#from breakups to isolations
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@saburo-kyoto
You’ve been stuck here on tumblr with me for years, as really my only real constant. We don’t interact as much as we used too, but I felt it appropriate to point out how much your presence has helped me. I’ve spent a good while on here feeling alone. Because some years back, pretty much all of my friends left tumblr entirely. You’ve been the one constant. The one glimmer of light through a really dark time. Generally, the only one around to encourage me whenever I was trying to do something here. Best of wishes. Lots of love. Lets go running into 2023 with our arms flailing, ready to punch God in the face.
@zenkaiankoku
You’re not the newest mutual here, but you’re the one that’s become a sense of comfort through all the shit in life. I genuinely enjoy talking to you and I genuinely enjoy the dumb BS we come up with when we do chat. I apologize for constantly keeping you up with my antics even though I’m sure we’re both just carried away and having fun. I love your take on the DCA and I look forward to goofing off with you more as we go into the new year. Lets see what sort of toomfoolery we can get into to disappoint the powers that be. Or weird them out. Either works for me.
@feralmoonlight
Admittedly, we haven’t really spoken much (then again, we haven’t really known each other for long at all). But I wanted to give you a personal thank you. I’ve spent a while struggling and generally feeling isolated. With tumblr being a right cunt for some reason and keeping my blog from turning up anywhere, I was getting hard to find the motivation to do much of anything. You were the hammer that turned up to crack the wall I felt that I’d wound up trapped behind. Slowly but surely, I’m getting out there again. Into a public setting. I’m finding people to interact with and I’m having fun in a fandom for the first time in years. What you did was something very small, and ultimately it was probably just a casual thing for you. But it still meant a lot to me.
So a very heartfelt thank you. Whether we get closer or not is fine. What matters now is that things are getting better. And it started with you.
I feel like spreading positivity so.
If you get tagged here, here's a few messages from the person who tagged you:
You are one of the coolest people I know, if not THE coolest ever. I may not have known you for long, but it feels like my whole life, and I don't know what I would do without you. If I haven't met you my life would be fundamentally different. You may have changed, but I've changed with you, and I think we've both grown a lot, and for the better.
I love seeing you create stuff! Be it art, writing, headcannons, or something you DIY-ed, I know that any time you make something it's bound to be good. Every project you start is always very exciting, even if you don't finish it! Watching you create is always very fun.
I know you have bad days, we all do. Don't hesitate to talk to me if you need to. I'm always here, I'll always listen, and I'll always do my best to try to understand and help. Know that you'll always be loved and appreciated!
Here's to our friendship growing even more in 2023!
(ps. don't feel pressured to tag anyone back! This is just to let you know that you're loved and appreciated. And if you were planning on tagging someone, but see that they've already been tagged, don't worry! This will be a message from you to them. Tag them!)
#the past few years have been rough#for everyone I'm sure#from breakups to isolations#to horrible losses and difficult changes#But we're all still here#we're still swinging#and I'm gonna keep swinging#to spite god and to spite my own inner demons#have a great end of 2022 guys#Lets make 2023 worth something to remember
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I loooove the jp fandom's headcanon that geeta and larry are childhood friends who met during their time in the academy and, sometime in the future, geeta personally recruited larry to work for the paldean pokemon league, as she must be one of the first people who knew of his prowess in pokemon battling! Like yeah, the whole geeta being a "strict boss who is frustrated by larry's stubborn insistence to be an average worker that she has to assign him different workloads just to broaden his horizon" idea is intriguing, but stepping it up a notch by making geeta be the "best friend a.k.a the only one who has seen larry at his very best and his very worst, and knows for a fact that he could excel at anything he put his mind into if he steps out of his comfort zone, so she doesn't particularly drag him out of said zone, but pushes him out of it each time she can because she can't bear to see her best friend be unaware of the good chances and positive things that awaits him out there, not if she has a (small) say in it" is also downright hilarious 😭🤚
#it's happened to me before which is why i think this headcanon isn't very far-fetched! it's actually so big-brained even lmaooo 😭😭😭#like. i happened to befriend a stupidly genius in high school and she's why i got into a reputable uni in the first place. she dragged me t#study even when i was never in the mood and look at what it did to my high school grades! look at the strict habits that got me through uni#it's also kinda like when you're isolating yourself after a bad breakup and your friend has to physically drag you out to eat. maybe to get#piss drunk as well. all because they know that it's better to have company than to rot alone in your room with your thoughts... you get me?#that's geeta and larry in my eyes. larry's whole line about sticking to flat well-trodden path isn't about making him a famous trainer to#inspire paldea (geeta's whole goal). it's just to show larry that there are other good things too if he takes a peek outside!#and at the end of the day geeta meant well with that advice. that all she wants is for larry to see more of the world than what he's used t#which... idk. i think it's just more heartwarming to think of that advice coming from a friend! even if said friend is also your strict bos#also makes larry's quiet fuming even funnier LMAOOOO 😭😭😭 sometimes you have to suck it up and endure your besties' whims#but this is not a silly and whimsical whim. this is straight-up corporate whim. larry's not surprised he ended up patrolling area zero 🤣#if you've read this far and wanna see jp fanart of them on pixiv i can refer them to you privately! all of them are lovely and heartwarming#champion geeta#gym leader larry#elite four larry#pokemon#pokemon scarlet and violet#pokemon scarvio#scarvio#paldea
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I'm actually really wondering how Bojan feels about... everything, cause Kris is just in denial but he's clearly very deeply in love. But what about Bojan? Does he know that he is in love with Kris? Is he also in denial? I don't think he really knows but maybe he does feel it but can't place the feeling?
You probably can't really answer this without spoiling, but I just had to ask.
😌
sorry i started typing out two tags and then just kept going i shouldve just put this all here but now its too late argh. sorry </3
#well .... we will hear about bojans side a bit later but i can say that at least right now this very moment neither of them have fully#defined romantic feelings for each other? theyre definitely SO slipping into it but without even noticing it#ofc ofc you can all interpret it in your own way as well but from my perspective its like. hm.#not DEFINITELY romantic yet but a weird limbo between platonic and romantic that theyve slipped into and i mean we all know its not gonna#stay platonic forever lmao but THEY dont know that yet 😌#but we'll get more into how bojan experiences it in a later chapter dont worry ✌🏼#inbox#apfel07#txt#chapter spoilers#like especially for kris i can say this:#him realising hes not in love with anja anymore / doesnt mourn the breakup anymore is HUGE and its a combination of#a) being forced out of his isolation that he put himself in after the breakup aka he is more social now he hangs out with the guys and#hes having fun and making connections and that helped him so much to get to this point#and b) the connection he has with bojan. developing new feelings (although hesitantly so) drew his focus away from clinging to what hes los#from anja#-> and then now that he stopped clinging to that loss those feelings hes starting to have for bojan have full freedom to develop further#so thats where hes at at the moment
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me slowly breaking down and isolating myself from everybody except my close friends and family because my first instinct when i get overwhelmed and don't want to be perceived is to make myself inaccessible to everyone else aha
#the friendship breakup from years ago still fucking me up real bad#self isolation feels safe for me#but yeah it's a problem and maybe i need to start talking to someone lol#g.txt
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Pls send help I feel so hollow and empty instead
#noodle talks#IDK if I'm crashing out or just depressed but ugh.#my chest physically aches over the dumbest shit rn#it's so weird when I feel this crippling notion that nothing will improve#i haven't really felt this way since like#my dad died and fresh off the breakup#I wish I could just like.#isolate from the whole world#i hate yearning for shit I can't have#unless i feel like settling.#i just feel so empty#I thought I'd feel better by now#i have ppl who care about me#loving family#a roof over my head that's not a nightmare zone#But the rot... it still persists.#ppl are always like 'u gotta love urself 1st before u love someone else'#ok ... how??#at least a couple days to one week out of each month I feel like hell#be it physically or emotionally#I'd rather be in physical agony rn than emotional agony#you think anyone would care if I fell off the face of the earth for a while?#i don't really think so.#I'm not particularly cool or swag to be around#just some weirdo who's embarrassingly transparent and easily hurt i guess 😮💨#here's to hoping the sound of the washing machine cycle Drowns out my sobs#if anyone asks I'll just say I'm sad over my dead dad#negative/#easier to explain than 'i hate myself and i want to die' i think#vent
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be so serious with me. do you think that shared trauma caused by interdimensional violence and death and government conspiracies and survivor’s guilt would seriously be outweighed by a petty high school breakup.
#be SO serious.#like. are you kidding. are you joking.#you'd isolate nancy from the other teens. two of her only living friends. bc of a stupid breakup in a dwindling failing unfortunately#incompatible relationship. you think that's like. a good take.#i'm personally a fan of steve and nancy weird awkward best friend soulmatism. they gave it a go it didnt work they still had fun chemistry#and they have all that shared experience.#i'm pretending i dont see s4's Moments#abby talks#i just got hit with this bc of a gifset of steve robin and nancy and the little gremlin in my brain went#oh people would Hate this. because god forbid nancy be anywhere near the golden duo. but they're STUPID#steve still admires nancy i think!!!! that's his first love!!!! and they made up in season 2 and so much has happened since???#i dont think he needed to say I may be a shit boyfriend because yeah no he wasnt. but he was not compatible for nancy#dealing with her trauma and her need for acknowledgment in barb's death. and her guilt. that's not a fault of either of them it just didnt#work. that's just. whoopsies oopsies it's almost like they needed to show an incompatibility there to eventually move her on to jonathan#which is so reductive and stupid and i wish she was just alone but whatever#and REGARDLESS of that. she is not responsible for his feelings of insecurity!!! she had a drunken rant and yeah that sucks it was harsh#but god everyone has their moments#another YOU PEOPLE ARE WEIRD!!!!!! moment. try fucking thinking for once#you don't have to like nancy but coming up with all these absurd ass excuses and centering her entire character arc around how she#interacts with men. oh i could kill you.#btw whatever i dont hate jon and nancy and it's a story and it's fine but god she could use time to just be with herself
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Ik in my heart Xina has posted on now defunct forums dozens of essays breaking down the historical inspirations for fictitious twencen scifi tech❤️
#she built her own vpn fr and uses it specifically to create twencen themed message boards and idk. spam Alchemax’s Twitter with bots#all jokes aside it would be so damn hard to disconnect urself as much as possible from social spheres that still fall under Alchemax’s#(or any other company’s) brand domain#in between breakup depression building AN ENTIRE ROBOT her ass completely self isolated#tunes talks 2099
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the mimuro tag is very small and also very weird
#multiple incidences of what i think are people just repurposing him into being their oc???????#also someone saying that mimuro and nisei’s breakup was the healthiest thing to happen in loveless which while i don’t think is entirely—#untrue i do think is a really funny way to frame it because it almost seemed like they think it was mimuro’s idea lol#like i do think the fact that it’s nisei leaving him is important because nisei is self isolating but also it shows that he cares—#he DOES care about mimuro and maybe even mei(!!) or at least wants to appear that he does (?) and while nisei is manipulative i don’t think#that this particular incidence is manipulation because like. fearless is basically useless to him at this point since they have faceless#and fearless aren’t great fighters or anything but anyway.#like idk it’s just interesting to me because mimuro could/could’ve been a really positive force in nisei’s life#but he ummmm. wasn’t. because he’s kind of a fuckingn asshole.#like idk i’ve said this before but fearless and mimuro do really come off as just Silly Little Guys#but like there is SOMETHING not right going on with mimuro#i don’t know where it starts or ends but at the very least he’s the type of person who’s willing to let a lot of nisei’s shit slide#we don’t know the degree of what he knows and i don’t think he knows everything i really doubt that but like.#he takes his pet 8 year old out to fight a famously strong adult at night for nisei so like.#not off to a great start!!!!!!!#we literally see him stealing from mei which is FUNNY but also like come on. dick move.
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My ex would deride me for eating a pop tart, but inject himself with a substance he bought on the internet that had only ever been tested on rats and which, he conceded, might increase the risk of cancer.
But I was being unforgivably irresponsible. For eating a fucking pop tart.
The fact that I convinced myself this man was an exemplar of rare intellectual genius is a fucking testament to my ability to suspend disbelief.
#the weird injectable is isolated from human gastric juices#it’s banned by the fda because of the lack of evidence vs risk of contamination#this man won’t get a covid vaccine#he also won’t get a sharps container for needle disposal#just throws them in the trash#actually argued with me about this#breakup thoughts
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1/3/2024 7:35 am.
#over 15 years of my life I’ve struggled with this#more than half of my life I’ve lived in shame from an addiction I was unwilling to face or accept#years of self hatred#isolating myself from people I care about#losing sleep#last night I finally told my mother about it#I’ve never directly told another soul this was a struggle for me#the last I tried to it backfired horribly#I’ve read so many stories of others who have struggled the same#I know this can be overcome and things can get better#I also know this isn’t going to magically fix everything#it won’t be a light switch life changer#but -those- thoughts came back#I had them after the breakup with Margo and I attempted in May 2 years ago#I can’t go on living like this#I’ll be talking to my therapist too on Saturday#so many times I’ve said I’d change and did nothing#I want to be free#i want my life back#they say one month is the hardest#so here’s to seeing yall in February
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This phrase popped into my head about my cat being a nuisance, but also going through a breakup so it just sounds like I'm lamenting that. rip trying to be overdramatic and have the drama just be fitting. Why do such lovable creatures create such anguish.
#idk i feel like i forgot how to be a person#doesnt help that my job is super isolating and i literally moved cities for this#WHY THE FUCK DID SHE WANT TO GET CATS#ugh i still just cant fathom any of this why would you get cats with your partner a month before leaving them#especially since this breakup isnt really a sudden thing apparently#this whole thing is like building a tower with someone and then they just yank the cloth out from under it right after placing a big block
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thinking about this again… it’s the wrongness of the situation, i think, that really gets me. i genuinely cannot imagine this ever going well, nor can i imagine alec ever being happy with someone else, and that is so sweet and so tragic at the same time
i really would not change a single thing about the malec plotline (breakup and all) but sometimes i really do wish we got to see alec date at least one other person yk? and i dont mean that in a pre-cog focing himself to date a woman to hide his sexuality way, i mean in a post-breakup rebound/fling kinda way like i just know the drama would be legendary
#alec’s behaviour throughout the breakup tells me that he isnt the type of to really think about getting back at his ex#nevermind that its MAGNUS#and nothing about magnus strikes me as a jealous possesive type either#if alec ever dates another person i have no doubt whatsoever that he would be thinking of magnus the entire time#i think magnus would pretend like its no big deal but it Clearly is#i feel like this is something jace and izzy came up and alec just went with#cause what else is he doing?#but like sooo much of alec’s development came from magnus#and i think it would be so interesting to see that in action in a diffrent context??#cause i feel like the tmi gang is vry.. isolated? from other people#and it would be so interesting to see them from a diffrent perspective#honestly this never would happen in canon and im glad for it lol
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Can't Have a Good Thing || My ex is a footballer LS2 edition
[masterlist][my ex series masterlist]
summary you go from dating an american footballer to an american driver
pairings ex!christian pulisic x reader, logan sargeant x reader
warnings probably a little anti pulisic but i still love my baby
notes pictures are from pinterest so thank you to all those lovely users (as I wrote this my english teacher from 11th grade came into my job and it was not fun!)
May 2023 ynusername posted -------
liked by cmpulisic, reece and others
ynusername final chelsea game of the season, love you guys
chelseafc awww we love you too yn ❤️ by author
cmpulisic always love having you there ↳ ynusername wouldn't want to be anywhere else
username1 look at my girl dawg, chelsea is embarrassing her ↳ username2 please, christian didn't even play
reece once a blue always a blue ↳ username3 NAH WHY IS THIS SO CRYPTIC ↳ username4 you can't say shit like this then leave DUDE
username5 that chrisyn interaction screams for help ↳ username6 i wouldn't be surprised if they're not dating anymore but trying to keep up appearances ↳ username7 breakup statement incoming ↳ username8 can we get fabrizio to comment on wag breakups please!! ↳ username7 lol can you imagine a here we go! breakup is official! peak comedy
cesarazpilicueta 💙 ↳ ynusername love you too capitan!
July 2023 real life ---------
It’s been a rough few months in the house for the two of you. Christian’s time at Chelsea was most likely coming to an end, and you had just started a new project at work, so your time was filled with that. Nights spent making dinner and laughing together turned to plates left in the microwave and lights out early. Mornings started with short wake up kisses to hardly whispered goodbyes.
In fewer words, the relationship was falling apart. You barely knew what was going on in each others lives anymore, it’s no surprise when he tells you he’s leaving Chelsea.
Chris is still in Florida with his family, enjoying the last few days off before preseason. You had been with him for the 4th of July, but needed to fly back to London almost immediately for a new project and you’re exhausted. When he Facetimes you it’s almost 11:30 at night and your still sitting in your home office, but with how excited Chris is, he can’t tell that you’re operating on extremely low levels of energy. You want to be excited for him, but you can see the writing on the wall.
“Hey babe.” You know what’s coming, but it doesn’t make the shock any less. “I’ve got some big news.” He waits for you to say something, but all you do is blink and nod. “AC Milan are going to sign me.” He waits again for you to say something. “Did you hear me? I’m leaving Chelsea.”
“Yeah, I heard you.” Your lack of enthusiasm confuses Christian.
“Then why aren’t you excited?”
Your apathy turns to frustration quickly and you shift in the chair. “Because, Christian, I’m not just going to blow up my life in London to follow you to a new city. I’ve got a job here and it’s going well. I don’t want to have to start all over again. Not to mention learning a whole new language. Have you considered how isolating that would be for me?”
“So what, I just rot at Chelsea because you don’t want to move?” He is now just as defensive as you, words biting at the holes that have formed in your relationship, making them grow.
“I didn’t say that!” You sit up even straighter, putting your phone down against the computer so it stands on it’s own.
“Well it sounds like you don’t want to leave.”
“I don’t want to pack up my life and move to a new country where I don’t know anyone.”
You could see the fight leave his body as he came to the same realization you did. “What’s going to happen to us?”
“I think we’re done Chris.” You can feel your heart break that last little bit with the words you say. You love Christian, but with everything you’ve gone through, it’s not enough.
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September 2023 real life ------
In one hand you held your phone, looking down at the details of your train back to London, in the other a hot chocolate to warm you up in the brisk wind of Oxford. It’s how you missed the body in front of you and ended up falling straight on your ass because of it, hot chocolate splashing onto your shirt.
“Fucking hell,” you whispered, pulling your shirt away from your body so it didn’t burn.
“Oh my god, I’m so sorry,” said an American accent. You groaned in your head, not wanting to deal with this. “I should’ve been looking where I was going.” They put a hand in your face, gesturing to help you up, which you took.
“No, it was my fault, I was staring at my phone,” you told them as they pulled you up. He was strong, and also probably a little awkward as he was still holding your hand.
“Me too, so I really won’t let you take the blame.” His awkward smile was also cute, but you tried not to think that, it wouldn’t agree with your ‘no boys agenda.’ “Do you need another hot chocolate?” The cup was empty at your feet, making you wince.
“Yeah, probably another shirt too.” It’s at that point that he realizes he’s still holding your hand, and he drops it.
“Let me get you one.”
“Don’t worry about it.” You’re still very early for the train, but travel anxiety is terrible and you want to leave soon.
“I insist.” Something about his smile and red cheeks makes you say yes to him, and you’re really not sure why. “I’m Logan, by the way.” He’s leading you back into the line of the cafe, smiling at you still.
“I’m YN,” you tell him.
ynusername posted ---------
liked by logansargeant, benchilwell, and others
ynusername exploring oxford finally
bsfinstagram babe you run into any quidditch players ↳ ynusername bitch you know i'm swearing off athletes
username7 damn why are you so beautiful
samkerr 💞 ↳ ynusername ugh bestie i love you
pulisick10 'SWEARING OFF ATHLETES?' Christian mate pulisic what did you do!?! ↳ username8 that is so fucking harsh though like pulisic really did a number on our girl here ↳ pulisick10 ben chilwell still in the likes tho ↳ username8 nah her and ben are friends, like ben was always close with christian and just cause he left doesn't mean that she can't be friends still ↳ username8 also she's still good friends with the women's team ↳ pulisick10 well that's cause the women are better ❤️ by ynusername and bsfinstagram ↳ username8 NOT HER LIKING THAT but also won't argue with that
logansargeant at least the weather was good ↳ ynusername youre right, thank you english sun who comes out once in a blue moon ↳ bsfinstagram I'm questioning things ↳ ynusername well you shouldn't
username11 she's sworn off athletes but has a formula 1 driver in her comments... ↳ username12 fake bitch ↳ username13 two people can be friends right? ↳ username12 she breaks up with christian because of the distance but is talking a driver like he isn't gone more than half the year, she's definitely fake for that ↳ username13 how do you know that's why they broke up ↳ username14 she doesn't she's just being a hater ❤️ by ynusername ↳ username11 damn all this fighting on my comment thread?
username12 not yn liking so many comments, do you read them ↳ ynusername gotta appreciate a good laugh ↳ username13 yn stalks her comments like a real one should
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yn's messages -----------
November 2023 yn's messages ------------
real life --------
Your hotel room is kind of a mess, with clothes thrown around and various pieces of paper on the floor. It’s not really a surprise to Logan, even though he hasn’t known you very long.
After a long day exploring New York City in fairly okay weather, the two of you are relaxing in your hotel room before dinner. “Can I ask you something?” Logan asks. He’s currently sitting in the desk chair, feet propped up on the desk and head hung back.
“Go ahead.” You’re on your bed, laying like a starfish.
“Would you say yes to going on a date with me?” You sit up straight, staring at him with wide eyes as he doesn’t move.
“Are you asking me on a date?”
“No, I’m asking if you’d say yes to me asking you on a date.” His clarification makes you narrow your eyes, but he still doesn’t move.
“I don’t think it’s a good idea right now.”
That gets him moving, turning the chair to look at you. “So would you say yes or no?”
“I’d say no right now.”
“What about in a month?”
“In a month, when we’re both back in England, I’d probably say yes.”
“Cool,” he shrugs, going back to putting his feet on the desk. “Then I’ll ask you again in January.”
ynusername posted ---------
liked by logansargeant, alexalbon and others
ynusername look who came to visit
lilymhe booooo bring me next time ↳ ynusername you're welcome whenever, he invited himself ↳ logansargeant literally not true you asked me to come ↳ ynusername stop lying! i wanted thanksgiving but you have this job that makes you fly across the world to drive a stupid car or something
oscarpiastri look at him jumping for joy for you ↳ ynusername yeah well, what can i say, I'm a dream come true
bsfinstagram ahhhh just under 2 weeks until you come home!! ↳ ynusername I missed you so much ↳ bsfinstagram debrief over wine incoming!
username18 nope she is definitely dating this driver ↳ username19 it's so weird cause like if she really broke up with christian because of distance then isn't this just so much worse ↳ username20 i don't think they broke up just because of distance, things were probably weird for a couple of months before hand cause she wasn't going to as many mens games, she was definitely going to the women's games though.
timothyweah did you get a hotdog from the hotdog guy? ↳ ynusername yes... why? ↳ timothyweah cause they're good and i just want to make sure that you did ↳ ynusername okay timmy
chelseafcw don't stay too long we miss you ↳ ynusername aww, i miss you guys too
May 2024 ynusername posted--------
liked by oscarpiastri, landonorris and others
ynusername Miami you can be pretty but you're on my shit list
landonorris no whyyyyy ↳ ynusername idk might have something to do with my boyfriend dnfing at his home race. ↳ landonorris oh, okay ↳ ynusername but i guess congrats on your win ↳ landonorris thanks ynnnnn! ↳ oscarpiastri someone is still drunk
logansargeant ohhh he's handsome ↳ ynusername yeah and he's got a jealous ass girlfriend so beware ↳ logansargeant love you too babe
username23 finally confirmed that they're dating only seven months later
#logan sargeant x reader#logan sargeant imagine#logan sargeant smau#formula 1 imagine#formula 1 smau#f1 smau#read#logan sargeant x fem!reader#logan sargeant#christian pulisic x ex!reader#my ex is a footballer series#danielle writes
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Analysis: Why Jayce broke up with Mel in Arcane 2.08
Since the finale episodes of Arcane dropped this morning, I've been going back and re-watching some of my favorite scenes, and I was struck by Jayce breaking up with Mel.
First of all, yeah, he clearly does break up with her, though I missed how formally he does so on my first watch-through. He does it in the Council chamber, just before Viktor attacks. But since they get interrupted, he finishes breaking up with her (after checking in with her) on the balcony later.
But what really struck me about the breakup wasn't in those scenes, but actually back in 2.07, when Jayce is alone in cavern in the darkest timeline. I definitely didn't catch on the first viewing that this is where he chose to break up with her.
In the background, you can hear Jayce in the depths of his despair and solitude starts going over in his mind all the steps that led him to where he is.
Here are some of the quotes he hears:
"I never asked for this!" - Himself to Viktor, trying to justify his actions up to that point just before Viktor leaves him.
"This research is everything, my whole life," a quote from one of his first conversations with Viktor but, more importantly, it establishes Jayce's entire raison d'etre up to that point. Hextech research was his life.
"He was my mentor, Mel, and I betrayed him," obviously is Jayce discussing the coup d'etat against Heimerdinger he orchestrated to save Viktor, but it was with Mel's assistance and urging.
"You must destroy it. It corrupts. Consumes." A quote from Heimerdinger, warning against Hextech. Which must feel especially prescient now that Jayce is stuff in the evil bombed-out future where Hextech destroyed the world.
"I was trying to create magic." Jayce to the Council to defend his Hextech research and save himself from banishment, but, he only mentioned magic at Mel's goading, which I would guess he's beginning to recognize now for what it was in retrospect.
"It's your time now, Jayce." Mel, part of her goading of Jayce into advancing Hextech research and his political career.
"Perhaps it's time for the era of magic." Mel's words on the night she saw Hextech for the first time, after helping Jayce and Viktor break into Heimerdinger's lab.
"You must destroy it." Heimerdinger about the Hexcore, again, probably feeling pretty prescient right now with Jayce literally in the pit of despair in a the evil Hextech future.
Finally, while looking out over the fire while clearly going nearly insane from the isolation, Jayce begins to hallucinate seeing Mel. But then, her image in the fire gives way to Viktor's.
The decision has been made there. It's not just Jayce reflecting on his two closest loved ones (as I thought the first time), rather, it is the moment Jayce makes his decision: he is picking Viktor over Mel. He has decided that the reason he is here in this terrible place is because of Mel, not Viktor. He is choosing his partner, going back to what they had before she became involved in their life. His new course is set.
Now, I want to preface the next part by saying I love Mel, she's a fascinating character, and though I ship Jayvik I also ship/shipped MelJayVik, so this isn't coming from a place of bias. I'm just analyzing the material when I say these flashbacks were Jayce rearranging the narrative in his head and realizing Mel's been manipulating and goading him in his pursuit of Hextech.
Given where he is when this is happening: starving, freezing, in pain, alone for weeks if not months in a stone box, slowly going insane, surrounded by the burnt corpses of people destroyed by Hextech, I'd say... yeah. His need for someone to blame is pretty understandable. He even starts whispering, "No!" in a panic at the memories in response to what she says in his mind.
So when we get to the Council chamber in the main timeline in 2.08, I'd argue that Jayce is spoiling for a fight. He's had months of agony to decide things are over with Mel and that he's angry at her. He wants to blame her for what happened to Viktor, for what happened to him, and he's in pain and he wants to lash out. The relationship is definitely over.
But then Mel is in pain too. And Viktor shows up, with his own autonomy, showing that they all had their shitty parts to play in this drama.
The attack by Viktor adds another element, Jayce was probably also mourning that he had to shoot Viktor at that point, another thing that was painful and made him want to lash out and blame others for this horrible place he's in emotionally and the horrific place he's been in physically until recently.
It's only after Viktor's attack though that Jayce realizes that this situation is complex, it's not all Mel's fault. It would be easier to just pin all the blame on Mel and make Jayce and Viktor her victims, but Viktor shows to him that he has his own agency and Jayce needs to be clear-eyed going forward about who he is saving, because it's not "Mel's victim". Viktor is his own person.
Jayce also remembers some of the care he once had for Mel when he catches her before she falls (in a tender moment I mistook for a full reconciliation between them the first time but no, it's just him remembering he cares for her wellbeing). Jayce can't trust her anymore, after realizing just how adept she was at manipulating him without his realizing, but he does still care for her as a person. And he's cooled off enough to address the pain she is clearly carrying.
(I admit, I do love this moment of him calling himself an ass, because I adore Jayce but it's a lovely beat of self awareness and really shows his growth as a person that he can say this to someone that just hours before he was squaring up to fight against and blame for all his misfortunes.)
But anyway, the moments you really see that it's over between Mel and Jayce:
When he doesn't explain to her what happened to him. That's not for her to know anymore. He's decided that they're not together or intimate anymore. And he's probably still hurting from realizing how she's used what he told her in the past to encourage/manipulate him to her own ends and therefore wary of sharing. This is also a reason for the breakup: he can't share the immense pain he's been in because he can't trust her anymore, and he knows it. It's over.
In the scene on the balcony when he turns away from her instead of towards her before offering his advice. Jayce is very touchy-feely, he always offers physical comfort to his loved ones. But there, he deliberately turns away instead of taking her in his arms and comforting her. Again: it's over between them. But he still respects her. So he reminds her of how indomitable she is, along with offering the slight backhanded compliment born of his distrust for her: she's never the passenger, she is always the one in control. He knows, because he's realized she used to control him.
I've mentioned in other meta that this season deals in a lot of comeuppance for events in S1, and this is arguably Mel's. She'll be ok, she's got magical sun powers and she's the head of a powerful house now. But she doesn't get to keep Jayce in her life as her lover anymore after what she did, because she did manipulate him, even if she had good intentions mixed with the self-interested ones.
The trust is simply gone now. But he cares for her and wishes her well, so, I'd argue they parted on as good of terms as could be done.
#arcane#arcane spoilers#jayvik#jayce talis#mel medarda#it's about their relationship but I'm not putting it in that tag because it could come across as anti#but I'm not anti Mel this is just analyzing the text
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Gale canonically asking his closest friend (Tara) to leave the room before he takes off his shirt versus the fact that people can change his clothes to be the wavemother's robe or just shirtless or whatever.
From a video game perspective, it's just the option of making the characters wear whatever. From an in-story perspective, Gale had a bad breakup, spent a year in isolation, and then started trapesing around the continent, v neck low chest fully out zero modesty, skirt slit up to his thighs. Full depression followed by the probability of death bringing on a hot girl summer in this middle aged man.
#this is not a baldur's gate quote#gale#gale dekarios#gale of waterdeep#bg3#baldurs gate#baldur's gate#baldur's gate 3#baldur's gate iii#tara#tara the tressym
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The shitty thing about feeling as if you've been ignored is the Paradox you trap yourself in if you even THINK of mentioning it, on the one hand, if you directly say it to the faces of the people who have just been busy and haven't been ignoring you at all will think your clingy and desperate and might want to pull away from you because you've made them uncomfortable, on the other hand, if you do it in an untargeted soft way of "Hey I've felt a little left behind" in the general chat that could very well get ignored to, leaving you to just feel worse. It's a catch 22 of minty fucking eels
#Awled Ren Vents#posting this at fuck o'clock in the morning to avoid accidentally hurting anyone's feelings#Severe Isolation fucks with you#this whole situation isn't helped by the fact that I got broken up with not much more then a week before Christmas#while 2 thirds of the way though what turned out to be a nearly 2 week long migraine#because my glasses were slightly out of prescription and had a scratch that was constantly making my eyes refocus#and then got reminded that I'm about to experience my first valentines day single in almost 5 years#and the reason for the breakup?#I had confronted her about only ever coming to hang out with me to share her things#and even seeming disappointed and annoyed when we were doing something else#and constantly turning down every single offer I gave of joining us in our other thing even if I had to fit together a whole new schedule#to include her#and she'd promised to try and reach back a little more#and then everything barely changed at all#and she felt that wasn't fair to me#and is practically STILL doing it#meanwhile I can't get other people to even put in 5 minutes to throw an image on a doc without even having to consider formatting#or spend a few spare minutes putting the bare basics of their characters on to the point I have to do it#and everyone is always suggesting new things to watch and then somehow leaving me to do the scheduling#or saying 'oh we should write this all down somewhere' then not contributing at all aside from maybe three#of a group of up to 7 active people#sometimes 9!#I'm just sick of feeling like this#like I'm being ignored#like I'm the only one putting in effort#like I almost never get back what I put in#it makes me doubt myself so bad#my own skills- my personality- all of it#I can't even get one server to respond to me trying to set up times to talk to them or play the damn game we made the server for anymore
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