#friend time in 2 different worlds
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Dnd game today. You are jealous
#friend time in 2 different worlds#I need to draw the sexy scorpion man and the horrors of an ancient thing talking out a twitching dead body#or that woman talking about dissecting veil and singing ew#or oliver throwing back shots during the battle and being zappy#or Bip the undermount goblin who is perfect. amazing. my best friend.#prawn posts
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Like. Idk how to articulate it but it’s so insane to me that people will with their full chest say “I’m a tsukasa fan I #gethim” and not gaf about saki or ever talk about her or read any of her events or even her card stories with tsukasa. Everything in Tsukasa’s life has been touched by saki. You could, if necessary, take tsukasa out of saki’s story (it would make it worse! But you could). But you cannot take Saki out of Tsukasa’s story. He lives and breathes love for his sister there is no one on earth he values or loves more she is the catalyst for his dreams and his motivation. Before he was anything at all he was a big brother. even in the present he defines his ultimate goal of stardom & how to act like a star by the bench marks of being a good big brother. Don’t even get me started on seeing ppl make tsukasa say an ill word abt saki… they fought in dollfes and he wanted to be taken out back and shot like a lame horse. he 100% was like “well I remember what you’re talking about but you’re upset so clearly I’m wrong” he loves! His sister!! So much!!!! If you like tsukasa you have to love saki those are the rules. His starter vocaloid is the Ideal Big Brother his sister’s favorite stuffed animal is a constant figure in his sekai. His fragment sekai is about being a good big brother.
#mine#tsukasa#saki#tenmas#I love the tenmas so much I think tsukasa fans who don’t like saki will start coughing in 2 days#it makes me so frustrated when people don’t think abt that side of tsukasa#bc that’s 100% what endeared me to him in the first place#he loves his sister more than anything in the world and wants nothing more than for her to be happy#save me tsukasa colofes card save me…. it makes me cry every time. he loves saki so fucking much.#this is not to say saki doesn’t love him. it’s just a different dynamic w him being the older sibling and her being the younger sibling#in that he has his big brother complex and saki’s story is more friends focused#but always remember ‘if it wasn’t for you I wouldn’t have gotten through the hospital’ OUUUUUUUUUHGHHH I die. I die!
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i hate my face it needs to be softer and i hate my body it needs to be sharper
#there is nothing in the world i wished i had more than a smaller/rounder nose#why is that thang genuinely V#<#>#^#every direction sniffin#i want to bury my face in things and not impale them#i hate the way it looks when i smile#somehow it gets even bigger#and more downturned#and my body well . at least thats easier 2 change#im so hyper aware of how much i weigh i hate the number being known it makes me want to cry i feel too exposed#its like it being a secret keeps me safe#even though everyone can see my body anyway#if i just have that then im safe no one can hurt me#what if the number makes them see me differently#what if it changes the way i look in their eyes like it does in mine#what if the dysmorphia streaks out past just me#i know its stupid n realistically it doesnt matter at all but i am so Scared i am terrified#i hate my ed i hate everything it holds over me all the time everyday#every time i look at myself im different#n im worse#and no matter how much i suffer its never happy#im so sick rn im in pain but all i can think about is at least im not eating at least its stopping me from eating#i just want to be different i want to be anything else#i feel like im always going 2 be stuck as the grossest thing in the world#ill never get the chance to look at myself n see anything but that#i want to be better. i do. i want to just move on#im so tired. but im So awful looking. & everyone has always made sure i know it. made sure im lesser and i am#ive never had a real friend. theyve always hated me n kept be barely around because they feel bad for me. n just told me how bad i looked
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Lucy and Marona animatic of call them brothers by Regina Spektor and Only Son..
#duck speaks#psychonauts#haunted by an animatic I'll never make#but like.#over and over they call us their friend. can't we find something else to pretend ?#like nobody won and we're safe at the end ?#<- Lucy thinking about what if maybe it was different and Marona was safe..#I think mostly it would be her thinking back on it while she's older now and there's nothing that can be done#and then the um.#in the darkness the film machines spinning. so let's leave it on#we'll be out in the street before anyone knows that we're gone#<- her imagination still but them younger now (like teens or something idk)#maybe if they ran away then none of this would've happened..#and the.#the hunt is on. everyone's chasing. everyone's chasing a shot#a shot rings out. nobody wants it. nobody wants it to stop#<- her memories of what happened when she was Maligula coming through even though she's trying not to think about that#it could probably be either with the flood and what happened to Marona or even the fight with her friends and what happened to Helmut#maybe both ?#and then the last chorus would be her realizing that she can't fix the past and get Marona back..#but she still has family she can spend time with (the Aquatos and psychic 7)#idk about the other choruses much though.. probably at least one of those would have something to do with the locket in her brain world#but ough#Lucy and Marona...#um.#psychonauts 2 spoilers#probably I should have that there huh
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Gotta say my tags from this post are killing me
We're living past the end of our myth for a 3rd time. Number three. Triple of 'em
#Me: MK is a destiny defying boy!#s5: *kisses me on the forehead*#Okay random rant time#very much like. idk 4x06 painted being the ''Monkie Kid'' as a more negative/mysterious thing and MK kinda reclaimed it in 5x10#(though I guess MK has reaffirmed his identity as the monkie kid several times by now (AHiB; RoTSQ; 5x10; probs more))#But you know I do wonder like. Are there other reasons he's so similar to Wukong beyond being born from the same stone#Like why is he with the modern reincarnations of the pilgrims#Did Wukong really not know.#Why was the area around the stone so torn up.#What was up with the 4x06 memory Wukong flashes#Like I know MK was made as a sacrifice. Cool beans. Why. Why is he so powerful#Why did nine say SWK was an old friend and an old enemy#Like hello#''We decide who we are and what we do with the power we have!''#''This thing that wants to hurt that wants to destroy that wants chaos! [...] It's who you are!''#''The chaos is what makes them who they are!'' hello??????#''Even if it all leads to pain- that pain is ours! It's part of who we are!'' Hello?????#Idk s6 MK is made into a weapon arc I guess. ''All doomed to play a world in tearing this world apart''#or whatever#Like ultimately that feels like it was set up for whatever is gonna happen now that the cage is open right#''Whether it's better or worse- we only get to find out cause of you.''#Like MK chose to stop the cycle and therefore end and continue the ''eternal suffering of countless souls'' in different ways#Proving LBD kinda right tbh#So *starts dry heaving*#this shit keeps me up at night#God 5x10 is so funny to me. ''The people of this world are not weak!'' *is thinking only about his inner circle*#God bless you MK. God bless you gang#Everyone was so much more upset at MK sacrificing himself than they were at the world ending like they fucking kill me#Guys be normal for 2 minutes please#lmk rant
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so wait, since i was just reminded of the recorder thing donna talked about in the giggle, i now have a question for uk ppl: do yall learn the recorder in school? like in a music class? and like how much do yall have music class over there?
#this is a very interesting topic for me as a music educator from the us#ik a guy from ireland and he said there was no music class in schools for him and like not the same country BUT same island#(as northern ireland. not the others in the uk but still)#and its so wild and fascinating music education is a fascinating field and the way we do it in the us seems to be largely vvv unique to us#for clarification on how things are different so ppl have a better idea on how to answer my question lol:#in the us music class is standard in elementary schools and most places have general music until abt 5th/6th grade (year 6/7)#(general music = basics- music games learn recorder SOME notation-reading; often classroom instruments eg boomwhackers claves maracas#orff instruments if you're lucky/from a school district that isnt poor. also some world music)#its less standardized after that and not every school will have music after middle school but concert bands and choirs are both huge here#choirs start right on the heels of general music classes (sometimes start earlier + students elect to be in choir instead of general music)#bands USUALLY start in 4th grade (year 5) but sometimes can be later 5th/6th (year 6/7) or even 7th (year 8) (WAY less common)#depends on the state generally 4th is most common i think (choirs start at around the same time i think so probs 4th but choir isnt my area#orchestras are weird bc theyre a lot less common but can commonly start younger bc of one of the big approaches to music ed (suzuki method)#so like maybe 3rd grade (year 4) maybe 4th w/ band (year 5) but i have a friend who teaches at a private school#& said they have 1st/2nd graders (year 2/3)!! orchestra is also not my area though#also marching bands: vv common! usually just in hs (starting 9th grade / year 10) bc it supports the football team at games#but starting in 8th grade (year 9) is also common (sometimes even 7th / year 8)#theres two different styles: collegiate/show band and competition. former is very rah rah pop music etc; competition is more abstract#show bands are clearly designed to entertain whereas competition is designed to be more impressive and tell a story#so more impact moments abstract shapes/lines on the field and has movements - opener ballad closer (fast-slow-fast)
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trying to not be apprehensive about upcoming homebrew campaign and YET
#i just feel like theres a big disconnect from the characters the group wants to play vs what the campaign actually is gonna be#and unfortunately me and the dm just have different tastes for building dnd worlds/campaigns#hahah i should message him 2 be like hey. should we make totally new characters cause in the time since we made our pcs what you’ve made has#changed. and i dont wanna be playing a character whos stuff going on will never be relevant to any of the things you’ve planned#i love this group they’re my friends i adore them. but for this campaign to not totally fall apart. we gotta make characters that fit the#tone of whats been put down :/ and unfortunately thats not the type of character anyone gravitated towards
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the way all of anders' battle dialogue in da2 sounds stressed out right to the brink of hysteria is something that can actually be so personal. it's the real healer experience. anders you're herding moths constantly trying to launch themselves at any passing bonfire with your whole chest and your whole heart and you are so valid
#you can hear him all but tearing his hair out as he flits between them to get them back on their feet fhsdkjfa#obviously this is exactly what lands him in a fucking world of trouble but anders truly does just care so much at all times#dragon age#dragon age 2#anders#for real tho the battle dialogue in DA2 is phenomenal in general#it's so in-character and so emotional -- it makes it feel so real for them to have all these ways to react to each other getting hurt#they're friends not an army! they react as if their friend or their sibling just went down in front of them!#(except fenris who delivers all his lines with the sort of dry absentmindedness you'd use for commenting on the weather#and we love him for that)#carver gets super small and scared when he gets injuries and lashes out at you because of it but he's just. afraid.#he just wants his big brother/sister to fix it and it makes him sound so young and vulnerable under the surliness ;____;#also there's so many -- and I cannot stress this enough -- EXTREMELY funny lines in there#it's the sort of detail work I'm kind of sad inquisition left behind#tho I DO understand why it's not a thing you can feasibly do when you have permutations of like nine different companions lol#but the mixed horror and disbelief whenever aveline or hawke go down -- like they are universal constants to the rest of them.......#does so much storytelling and character work in such a little space it's so *elegant* writing-wise
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Do y'all make your tav(or origin) align perfectly with their love interest at all times and cheese the game to make sure you never get disapproval? Or do you lick the spider cause it's funny, repercussions be damned?
#bg3#baldur's gate 3#my friend and i have very different playstyles is all I'm saying#at least as far as romance is concerned#-2 approval is not the end of the world y'know#approvals don't have to align all the time for people to be compatible#or a dynamic to be interesting#ranting in the tags#you know how it is
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cancer sucks yo
#3 separate fiends#and i mean CLOSE friends#all had a parent get diagnosed with cancer#in the past year alone#2 out of these 3 lost said parent bc their diagnosis was stage 4#1 was my BEST friend and i grieved with him bc of that and being an empath#this was last january#the other was a family friends mom who was one of my other moms bc of how often i’d be at their house#one of 2 friends moms who i called mom to be funny but there was sm love there#she just passed away#luckily my 3rd friends mom had surgery that made it a lot better but still not gone#she’s doing well#but god fucking DAMN#3 friends all in the same time span#1 who broke my heart to see his family endure it#and another who i’m currently genuinely grieving bc i had a relationship a great one for a long time w her#even if me and my friend became different people and there was some conflict#this made all of it not matter anymore#i’m so happy i got to make peace with her and her mom a few months ago#that she didn’t leave this world with us on bad terms#cancer fucking SUCKS.
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i feel so much comfortable on here than on twitter and idk why it’s such a shock every time i come back here
#it’s like. i feel like such an outsider and a loser on twitter and it tanks my mental health and self esteem and i’ve found myself very#focused on follower count bc number have always fucked with my brain#and it’s different here. idk i feel like y’all actually want me here which means the whole entire world to me#i don’t hate twitter completely bc it’s where my favorite group chat is and where i keep up with current events + yellowjackets but i do#think i need to limit my time scrolling#idk everyone has their little friend group in the yj fandomand i’m flailing#anyway. that’s all. i try not to get too negative / in my head here bc i like to keep this blog positive#anyway (take 2) i love all of you guys here and if we have ever spoken even once i love you and consider you a friend <3
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the suyeol lore is so crazy
#their relationship is so interesting to me like aoughhhh#like you see subaek and even tho they don't talk a lot on camera (most of the time) those two get along so well#they understand and respect each other so much they take their job very seriously and they're actually good friends as a result#suyeol on the other hand is 12 years of slowburn like it's crazyyyyy#you admire him and believe in him like no one else does and then you discover that he isn't that great actually#so you get disappointed and distance yourself and then you both are in this weird limbo for years as you grow up#and slowly but surely you rediscover how your relationship works because both of you are adults now and now we're here#like yeah suhito was stressed back then the context was not great for a leader AND tao was still with exo so lmao pcy could fend for himself#so i get ittttt they were going through it but. i need to know what he said to pcy like oh my god was it really that bad 😭#i wonder if they've ever mentioned it 🤔#writing this bc i just remembered that one time they had to describe e/o and suho was like#“you're my cute dongsaeng i admire your talents so much and oh btw you're not uncomfortable around me these days right? uwu”#LIKE ??? KING YOU CAN'T SAY THAT AND LEAVE US IN THE DARK#(<- they totally can it's not our business lmao)#idolization to tentative ''''enemies'''' to coworkers to friends to good friends is crazy#i need to look into this properly omg let's do some research#anyways i want a subunit :) they can be called exo sc too sehun won't mind bc these are like his favorite people in the world!!!#idk i find the exos and their bond so interesting because you truly have it all with them there's a whole spectrum of friendships#and i appreciate that it's not like with b*s & taegi (if you don't know who they are... let's keep it that way <3)#because those two were just too different to get along. it was extreme. but bighit forced it so much it was painful to see sometimes#and then the hawaii trip came and they painted it like a ''see? after this trip they get along so well now <3'' moment#1. girl let's be serious for a sec 😐 and 2. it's not our business!!!!! focus on making good music!!!!!#i'm so glad exo didn't have to go through something like that bc i just know that they'd have disbanded by now sjfsifjsk#the saranghaja sprite isn't that intense we lovr freedom of choice (keeping in mind that they were under sm) <33333#so YEAH. can you guys tell i can't sleep hehe :)#dara.t#suho and chanyeol
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cue screaming abt legends Z-A
#I’m so happy they went for kalos instead of unova#like I love unova. I love unova. but I wasn’t sure what they’d do with it that would feel right#also I was 100% expecting johto either let’s go johto or legends celebi bc SO MUCH johto in that presents. THE UNOWN. and raikou and silver#but man kalos!!!! I rlly love the gen vi pokemon and it’ll be so cool to see what they do with a different version of the region#I’m expecting a kinda time travel element honestly? it seemed to go between futuristic + past stuff a BUNCH#with the redevelopment plan and the shiny light city#+ the two versions of the map it shows. those are Definitely 2 versions and one of them is past + more similar to the one we know#and one is updated but that could just be updating for switch#but ALSO Z-A. like okay AZ for a start is coming back but that’s very much a going backwards indication right#man my friend got to watch in real time as I went through the plot of the kalos games and remembered AZ and have everything click into place#it took me way too long to click that it was kalos in the trailer like it took me until talonflame to be like wait. and then PRISM TOWER#but god yeah I’m just like. I wanna know where they’re going with this bc I DOUBT it’s war era#it definitely COULD be but it would feel like a lot yknow for lumiose to be so similar that long ago#it’s not like 3000 years is a reasonable number in the first place anyway pokemon is weird#rlly rlly hoping there is the full region and that it’s made to feel less empty than paldea and hisui#if they’re going for an open world again which I feel like they will#I saw someone say they’re setting the whole thing in lumiose which would be a CHOICE. it’d be very different for sure#I don’t wanna say I wouldn’t like that but it would be a completely new kinda pokemon game. which would fit the legends idea. who knows#also wanna know what’s up with that logo bc I don’t recognise it. most similar is the aether foundation but that’s not close#even if it would make sense for aether to be around here (and I rlly hope they are)#okay wait so prism tower existing means it HAS to be future right bc clement designed it right? unless he redesigned it or smth#also I am excited abt megas coming back. I do like them they’re easily my favourite of the gimmicks#and I hope this means they’ll be sticking around again near future even though it’d be easy for them to drop them after this legends game#I can see them using lumiose or an otherwise limited setting as a way to stop it being a traditional game bc it’s proooobably not gonna be#like. go get gym badges yknow#yeah I’m rlly excited I can’t wait to see what they do with zygarde and where they’re going with this#pokemon#my money is still on time travel going backwards#luke.txt#plza
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I've not been on my ADHD meds lately so I could properly recover from the illness (probably covid and it's not exactly gone but it's gone enough that I'm good to do stuff in the house again) and I love that the second I'm back on them my brain is like "NEW AU??? MAYBE!!! BUT!!! I FELL FOR SOMEONE NEW BUT SHE'S JUST ANOTHER GIRL THAT LOOKS LIKE YOOOOUUUUUUU POOR CHICA RIGHT??? RIPPERONI!!!! TIGER TIME!!!!"
Like cool I don't feel as tired now but wow that's um. Fun?
#thinking of actually playing pokemon gates to infinity for more than just s bit#like properly playing it through#the only reason i didn't was because I'd gotten back into time/sky/darkness#just before and i really didn't like the switch to 3D everything#but also the 'you can only do one thing at a time'#LIKE NO!!!! LET ME DO A HUNDRED THINGS IN A SINGLE DUNGEON!!!!#and the fact i was expecting super mystery dungeon cause I'd asked for it and everyone said they got it for my chrombo#and they got gates to infinity instead which i specifically didn't care for cause black and white generation#which... i actually liked wait why didn't i want it?????#wait.......#OH YEAH IT WAS BECAUSE IT WAS THE FIRST POKEMON GAME I SAW RELEASED#and they came out with black and white 2 which pissed me off#cause I thought the third versions were all just... released with the other two#like diamond pearl and platinum were together#so i thought that was BULLSHIT because there was never a bog difference other than legends before#(and the distortion world yeah yeah whatever fuck that place and its waterfall-less waterfall)#i just assumed black and white 2 wasn't different either but apparently it was??? i dunno but i think that was it#i should play it i remember being intriqued by what was happening but my friend and i were gonna play super together...#and then didn't so that was fun#anyway the au was what if roxy was guarding a thingo instead of mimic that poofed you to pokemon world if it needed you#and roxy and cassie and whoever else got whooshed away to pokemon world and did pokemon stuff#wouldn't that be fun? yeah it would be. good job me#pop rox talks#okay shit to do bye bye bye
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sometimes i think about interactions boat and i have had and things he's said to/about me over the years and it makes me feel as though i must occupy some little space in his heart. like i live in his mind rent-free the way he does for me, although not nearly to the same extent lmao.
speak of the goddamn devil i just got a steam notification he's playing tf2
anyway i never thought i'd have that kind of effect on a person, much less my favorite content creator. but it sure appears to be that way, and idk. it makes me feel special. warms my heart n all that :)
#was one of two people to give me their phone number when i had to drop off of discord 2 years ago#never took advantage of it though (shy (also we have different brands of phones so texting probably wouldnt work right#other person was an irl friend (never contacted them either#i remember one time YEARS ago when he was wanting to read jjba on stream or smth like that#him: it's like REALLY not family friendly me: well i shouldnt watch bc i am a Child him: no its ok you dont have to skip It's very dirty th#like guy clearly just wanted me there bc he enjoys my company And he's said he does! i remember him saying he likes seeing me in chat#and once again he was the one that wanted me on the staff team when usually the staff pick new recruits and boat has final say#and apparently he's talked about me to his other friends. that's kinda where the old Time to Mod in-joke started#he was using voice to text to talk to whoever and said my username but the thing misinterpreted it#that coupled with the meme drawing i did that he edited so it's him just saying 'pain'. eventually that dumb fucking image spawned#and then there was the night he spammed it and spam mentioned me in chat when he was streaming while i was ASLEEP#once we were in a vc and he was like 'wow i'd forgotten what your voice sounded like' NEVER heard him say that to anyone else. What#dont even get me started with him and my artwork (man would probably flip tf out seeing what i can do now LOL)#guy literally wanted ME to design an official tff logo but at that point they were kinda slowing down so it never happened#but yeahno i just. ugh. our friendship means a lot to me. i am ITCHING to speak to him again you have no idea#and to just give him a big ol hug. been wanting that for such a long time#quite frankly a friendship dynamic like no other ive seen#dont mind me REMINISCING. im sooo sappy about him he's the most important guy in the world to me#if god exists he knew we'd be too powerful if we grew up together
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Cringetober 2023 Day 2
credit to @sleeprann for the concept and awestin martinez for this year's prompt list
Day 2's prompt is "Self Insert"
I chose to insert myself into Homestuck, because I'm still trash all these years later. Tbh self inserting myself into homestuck, or homestuck-adjacent scenarios, has been a long time escape daydream for me. I'm always thinking about how cool it'd be to become god tier and about all the trauma playing SBURB would cause lol. I like to imagine how I'd get along with the characters too. As a Homestuck character, I'd be good friends with John/June Egbert (windy buddies hell yeah), and I think somehow we'd both end up getting retcon powers and saving the day together (maybe I got recon powers first and I ended up in Homestuck proper thru shenanigans involving them? idk). I'd also be besties with Karkat. We'd develop some unspoken feelings for each other that don't come out until post-canon/Homestuck 2, and in the meantime I'd be with Jane til she decides to go for Jake/Gamzee and have Tavvi (who'd I'd eventually steal adopt as my son so he wouldn't have to have a fascist as a mother)
if you'd like to participate in the challenge, here's the prompt list
#sma's art#cringetober 2023#cringetober#cringetober day 2#day 2#self insert#homestuck#homestuck sona#tbh tbh I fucking love making self inserts#Viti is my main self insert for most media involving humans and tbh in most she's still got her homestuck abilities#/maid of breath and recon powers cause I think its fucking neat#there's two separate AUs where instead of going to Earth C after the game with everyone timespace yeets them to another dimension/media#one she just straight up ends up immediately in the my hero academia universe/ dimension and becomes stuck there#and in the other AU they end up traveling thru multiple universes/dimensions trying to get home to her friends on Earth C#and she enlists the help of characters from those universes to help make portals or find portals that can send her home#but they always get redirected to a different universe instead of sending her to the one she's aiming for#currently in my vast expansive daydream world Viti hasn't made it home and might never get there#I think she's in the DBZ universe rn but its been a while since I followed that AU's plot thread cause I have BNHA brainrot atm#did I mention I was a maladaptive daydreamer?#anyways if anybody took the time to read these tags thanks. hope you dont' think my daydream/ inner multiverse world is cringe#but then again this post and challenge celebrate cringe so fuck it idc if it is or not#it just feels good to talk about my daydreams even if nobody reads about em or cares#btw Viti doesn't remain in Homestuck's artstyle when she's transported to a new universe. her appearance changes to fit in where she's at#if I could draw better I'd SO make art of them in the different medias they visit. alas I can barely draw people right as it is.#maybe I'll buy art of her in different styles some day. that'd be fun af
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