#free my man nobody taught him the social expectations of robots

[dwln-22]

Very important question, can snaketoad kiss?

Sadly no, because of how I've decided to draw them...Snake man's snake jaw and his big ol forehead will physically get in the way. Toad man doesn't even have a mouth!

Alternatively, maybe their animal heads are their actual faces and they bonk foreheads to kiss. (Aw!)

This is my way of saying IDK how these guys would kiss. So I'll probably never draw it, because i genuinely have no idea. Which I honestly don't mind because in my hc robots show affection in different ways.

(Like caressing faces, cuddles and handholding. Yeah, humans do that too but to robots it's a much bigger deal. Holding hands for a long time? It's equivalent to making out for them. Getting caught cuddling is very scandalous and no one wants to see you holding your partner's face in public!)

[rayveewrites]

Ray Hijacks the Team ZIT Ghostbuster AU Again

So @shadeswift99 made a few posts a while ago about a Team ZIT(S) ghostbuster AU, And then I may or may not have hijacked the post to add in ideas for most of the other hermits because why not.

Now, back then I was spitballing ideas and making them up on the spot, which is admittedly my usual writing process, but hey.

That said, I've had more time to think about it, and then last night I blacked out for a few hours and came to with a Google Doc filled with short bios for all of the hermits and a handful of hermit-adjacents. Now, this rapidly turned into an urban fantasy AU in my hands, but hey. It's fun.

This is in alphabetical order, with alternate personas (EX, Helsknight, Beetlejhost) beneath their original counterparts when applicable:

Bdubs

Lives in an old mansion in the woods alongside Doc for reasons known only to them. Bdubs works as an interior designer, with a side gig as a freelance hairdresser. His eyes are unnaturally large, similar to Keralis’, and he is at least partially a plant. Completely feral and frequently gets in trouble for having knives on him at all times. He and Cleo have a thing called Knife Club which makes everyone else nervous. Nobody messes with Knife Club. It’s not worth it. Sunbathes frequently.

Beef

Is a perfectly normal human being. He works as a butcher with a side gig as a graphic designer specializing in album covers and spends his free time playing pokemon and dragging Etho along to social events. He was the first person to spot the cryptid, and the first person who Etho approached of his own accord.

Biffa

Is a ghost possessing a robotic shell. Biffa is from the future. While initially his main goal was to get back home to his own time, Biffa has since made friends and settled down into a new life running a cafe specializing in a wide range of teas. He’s quite content with this, and has actually found himself far happier than he was in his own time. While his nature means he can see, hear and touch ghosts, his body was built specifically for a disembodied soul to be in the driver’s seat, and he doesn’t want to risk another taking control. Also, he has more important things to do than have fistfights with ghosts.

Cleo

Is a ghost possessing her own dead corpse. Her nature allows her to see, hear and touch ghosts. Can and will fistfight spirits. She works as a teacher, so she’s usually busy, but occasionally in really nasty situations the Beetlejhost will drag her in to break a ghost’s legs. Does sculpture in her free time, and is actually really good. The only one who can wrangle Beetle to any real capacity, and she’s learned to keep him on a fairly short leash. Housemates with Joe, and Keralis also pops in pretty frequently. Has Knife Club with Bdubs. Has an enchanted flower crown that prevents her from decaying further; a gift from Beetle. Recently started learning magic in the form of necromancy and illusions. Has an ongoing ‘feud’ with Zloy, in which she temporarily traps his soul in random inanimate objects every now and then.

Cub

A bit of a ‘mad scientist’ archetype, Cub’s experiments are not exactly the most ethical, though they’re at least more professional than Doc’s. Responsible for the creation of Jevin. Cub gets possessed stupidly easily- sometimes willingly- and can usually handle it himself but sometimes has to call for help. Has a magical method of communication with Scar for exactly this reason. Has a day job as co-owner of a business called ConCorp, which he started with Scar. Has probably broken the Geneva Convention.

Doc

Was presumably human at one point. Now an abomination. Repeated experiments on himself have resulted in a massively changed facial and foot structure, a body covered in mottled green scales, claws, and goat horns. He lost half his face in one of his experiments, and constructed a new cybernetic one. He lost his right arm fighting God. Killed said god and would do it again. Lives in a mansion in the woods with Bdubs, though nobody’s really sure why. Owns a casino because of course he does. Also a living crime against fashion, because the man refuses to wear anything other than his tattered lab coat, torn jeans, and crocs.

Ely

Runs the local radio station. Nobody’s ever seen him in person, and nobody knows where he gets people’s voice clips for his remixes. Probably a cryptid. Maybe a ghost. Seems pretty chill, despite the blatant invasions of privacy.

Etho

Is a cryptid. Lives out in the woods in an abomination that can barely be called a house. Has never been seen in anything other than full Kakashi cosplay. Tends to keep to himself, but occasionally lets Beef drag him along to social events, often with Doc and Bdubs. Nobody really knows what his deal is. Probably not human. Probably.

False

Used to be part of an illegal underground cage fighting ring, until she earned enough to buy her way out. Having grown up in said ring, she struggles to adjust to normal life, but living in a town where the barista is a robot and the local tailor has wings makes it easier. She now has a job as security at Doc’s casino, alongside Iskall.

Grian

Is either an angel or a demigod, but nobody knows which. Has wings. Is both a tailor and an architect. A complete gremlin who has elaborate masks of various birds and will wear them to commit crimes. Eats seeds. Messes with everyone else’s plants. Lives in Jungle Wood Flats. Volunteers at the local theatre.

Hypno

Has three eyes, but hides the third one under a bandanna at all times. Can see ghosts with it. Had problems with sections of plumbing randomly getting clogged and also making very weird noises, and eventually called Team ZIT when the plumbers couldn’t find the source. Was prepared for ghosts, but wound up with a slime creature instead. Works in a $2 store for some reason.

Impulse

Is fully human. The most sensible member of Team ZIT (which admittedly isn’t saying much), Impulse has a day job as a freelancer building custom PCs and fixing broken tech. Agreed to the whole ghostbusting deal because he was bored, mostly. Was the first one to meet Skizz face-to-face, and is the one to own that particular place outright. Gets possessed every now and then, usually by larger spirits. Used to run solely on caffeine and chronic anxiety until Zedaph started getting on his case about his sleep schedule. Now he runs on less caffeine, more sleep, and the same amount of chronic anxiety.

Iskall

Was part of a cloning experiment to create the ultimate hitman, and was the only known one to both survive and escape before the whole thing was shut down by the authorities. Their eye and arm were replaced with cybernetics in order to increase their already enhanced abilities, and they were chased by said authorities, eventually winding up on Mumbo’s doorstep and becoming Mumbo’s problem. Now works as security at Doc’s casino, alongside False. Lives at Jungle Wood flats. Occasionally volunteers at the local theatre. Does bonsai as a hobby.

Jevin

Is the slime creature in the pipes. Hypno lets him live with him under the condition he stops blocking the plumbing and making weird noises at 3 AM (Jevin still blocks the plumbing and makes weird noises at 3 AM, just not as much as he was). Has taught himself to take a humanoid shape, and likes having fingers. Sleeps in the bathtub because he can. Was created from a vat of chemicals in a secret lab underneath the house, which used to be owned by Cub. Doesn’t really talk to the man in question that much, but will occasionally refer to Cub as his father for the sole reason of watching him go through eight existential crises in three minutes. Has a glock.

Joe

Head librarian at the local public library, and has read a lot of books on Supernatural Things. Is a veritable fountain of exposition if you can figure out what he’s saying or have Cleo along with you to threaten the integrity of his shins. Has never been seen in the same place as the Beetlejhost. Are they the same person? Are they entirely separate beings? Is there a Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde-type situation going on? Who knows!

Beetlejhost

Literally nobody really knows what his deal is. Nobody. Team ZIT ran into him on a call that they expected to be a false alarm and then he decided to follow them home. Spends most of his time being a minor nuisance in the most bizarre ways possible. Is implied to be responsible for the Ever Given getting lodged in the Suez Canal, but never confirmed. When he’s not bothering Team ZIT or getting them out of tight spots, he’s usually pestering Cleo, the only one who can keep him in line. It’s not really known if he and Cleo have a history or if they’re just Like That.

Keralis

Is a ghost haunting an architecture firm, and is mostly bound to the building, though he can travel to other buildings the firm has built, which is, uh, most of them. Initially only able to do small things- mostly writing notes or drawing diagrams- he eventually meets the Beetlejhost when the latter follows Mumbo to work one day for shits and giggles (he wanted to see how long he could mess with Mumbo before the man noticed. As it turned out, about a week, and by the end it was Iskall who noticed). After a couple of days in which Beetle teaches Keralis Ghost Things™, he scares half the office when he finally manifests for the first time. Has unnaturally large eyes and nicknames for most of the workers. Has no idea how he died or what his unfinished business might be. Very knowledgeable about architecture, and his input is usually very much appreciated.

Mumbo

Is a perfectly normal human being who does IT at Keralis’ architecture firm. Lives at Jungle Wood flats and spends most of his free time tinkering with tech and trying to keep Grian and Iskall out of trouble, which is a losing battle. Has a large, beating golden heart in his flat. He’s not really sure what its deal is, but if he feeds it apples it produces enough power for the entire building. Oh, and if he forgets to feed it for an extended period of time it starts draining his bank account. It’s really weird.

Pixlriffs

Was a perfectly normal human being until he died protecting a certain Russian zombie and became a perfectly normal ghost. Was a reporter in life and is a reporter in death. Runs a blog alongside Zloy about the local goings-on, supernatural or not. The blog’s the type where unless you live in/near the town you most likely won’t stumble across it, but they do have a small following of outsiders who assume the blog’s just a work of fiction. His unfinished business is to prevent Zloy from doing anything particularly stupid, a constant battle. Is able to go more places than Zloy due to being incorporeal, but respects people’s privacy. He’s bound to Zloy to a certain degree, not being able to go beyond a certain range of his friend. The range is pretty big, though, and he has plenty freedom of movement.

Python

Had a run-in with the fae as a kid, in which he accidentally pissed one off. In retribution, the faerie challenged him to answer a riddle or he’d be turned into a snake. Python’s answer was partially correct, so the faerie only transformed him partially. Python is fairly chill, though he strongly dislikes the cold and starts hissing if anyone disturbs him during Sun Time™. Sometimes Bdubs, being partially flora, joins Python for Sun Time™. He’s not venomous, because, you know...python. Also, he has a mildly disturbing habit of strangling rats and mice and then eating them whole, but he can’t help it and just tries not to do so when he has company.

Ren

Is a werewolf. He’s pretty chill regardless of form, though it’s only been recently he’s been comfortable enough leaving his ears and tail visible. He works as a lumberjack. One time Pixl introduced him to Monty Python’s Lumberjack Song and it quickly became his favourite thing. He spends most of his free time volunteering at the local theatre because Ren is absolutely a theatre kid and nobody can convince me otherwise. Gets possessed every now and then. Lives in Jungle Wood flats.

Scar

Works as a landscape developer. Gets possessed absurdly easily, though not quite as frequently as Cub. Has a magical method of communication with him. Technically co-owns ConCorp, but isn’t as involved. His cat, Jellie, is very obviously an eldritch abomination in feline form and he is comedically unaware of this. Lives in Jungle Wood Flats with Grian, Iskall, Mumbo, Stress, and Ren.

Skizz

Is the ghost haunting Team ZIT’s office. He was murdered by someone he’d thought was a friend who was trying to use his place to hide from the cops, and he’s stuck around, haunting the building. His unfinished business is to make sure nobody else uses the building for anyone shady, but the ghost rumours tended to chase most people off. Eventually he gets used to having Team ZIT around, and when Tango admits he doesn’t really have anywhere to go one day, Skizz eventually makes the decision to finally unlock the still-furnished upper floor for him. He’s bound to the building, but Impulse learns that carrying Skizz’s old vest with them allows him to leave. After that, Skizz sometimes accompanies them on missions and occasionally just hanging out. He’s usually more helpful than the Beetlejhost is.

Stress

Is a witch. Stress lives in Jungle Wood Flats and works as a doctor who specializes in supernaturally caused injuries- Team ZIT are some of her best customers. She also sells magic potions of various kinds, and has a side gig as a florist. She’s 90% of the Jungle inhabitants’ impulse control. Also has cryokinesis.

Tango

The Team ZIT member with a car. He gets possessed with frankly ridiculous frequency, but claims not to believe in ghosts for a long time (and keeps up the bit for even longer). Has developed various signals to indicate when he’s being possessed again. The strongest one, a rather nasty demon Cleo and the Beetlejhost had to team up on, left him with his glowing red eyes. He didn’t really have anywhere to go before Impulse bought the office, and tended to sleep on the couch or in his car until Skizz decided to let him into the upper floor, where he now lives alongside Zedaph and Impulse.

TFC

A now-retired ghostbuster, TFC calls in Team ZIT one night when he finds himself in over his head against a ghost with a grudge. He winds up becoming a bit of a mentor figure to the trio, usually coaching them over the phone if they’re not sure how to deal with one of the stranger spirits. Lost his leg years ago in a fight with a poltergeist that could have gone better, and now has a robotic prosthetic made by Doc.

Wels

While Team ZIT was out investigating some rumour or another in the woods, they came across a large stone box. Following video game logic, I guess, they then decided opening this large stone box sounded like a fun idea. Well, Tango and Zedaph did. Impulse was a bit more hesitant. The box actually held a medieval knight who’d been put in an enchanted sleep for centuries by his demonic doppelgänger, and was very much not prepared for modern life. Team ZIT took him to Xisuma, who happened to live closest, and Wels is currently helping out on the farm and trying to adjust to life in the 21st century. He can understand and speak modern English just fine because magic. Volunteers at the local theatre quite a lot.

Hels

Is Wels’ doppelgänger. Technically a minor demon. Won a fight with Wels and sealed him away for centuries as a result. A recurring problem. His real motivation is that he really desperately doesn’t want to go back to Hell, but he’s too proud to admit it. Lives in the woods with EX, who’s basically his only friend, though the weirdo with the brown cardigan keeps pestering him about his backstory and feelings for some reason. Has minor pyrokinesis.

XB

Like Biffa, XB is also a ghost from the future, though it seems to be a different timeline than Biffa’s. His unfinished business is preventing the apocalypse, but he has no idea how to do that, no idea if he’s in the right timeline, and is pretty sure he’s gone back a lot farther than he probably should’ve. Also, there’s the whole paradox issue, where if he prevents the apocalypse he never has a reason to go back and prevent the apocalypse, so he doesn’t prevent the apocalypse, so he has to go back and- he tries not to think about it too much. He mostly just hangs out in an abandoned house on the edge of town and vibes.

Xisuma

Is a beekeeper. Nobody’s ever seen his face; when he’s not in his beekeeping outfit, he’s either wearing a helmet, or (more recently) an extremely lifelike and detailed animal mask (is it a mask?). Actually a shapeshifting alien, he crashed down to Earth after a scuffle with his evil clone and was stranded because Earth doesn’t have the right tools or resources to repair a spaceship. These days he’s actually found he’s happier tending to his bees, selling honey, and helping his friends out, and probably wouldn’t leave Earth even if he could. It’s a simpler life, but a pleasant one. He bonds with Biffa over a shared love of tea and being stranded in a technologically inferior world and finding a home.

Evil Xisuma

Is Xisuma’s clone. Feels that if everyone’s going to call him ‘Evil’ he may as well own it. Shot his original’s spaceship down in a scuffle but wound up being brought down with him. Currently hides in the woods. Generally more of a minor nuisance than an actual danger. Used to spend his free time bothering X but has gotten put off by Wels, who has a problem when it comes to evil clones. His friends consist of Hels, who is a terrible role model, and Zedaph, who’s trying to help him work through his problems behind everyone’s backs. Can summon lightning because he deserves it.

Zedaph

Is the reason Team ZIT is ghostbusting in the first place. He’s a sheep shearer by trade, but that’s a fairly seasonal thing and ghostbusting is more fun anyway. Has somehow never been possessed, and claims it’s because he’s always standing next to Tango. He makes sure the other two gets enough sleep Because we all know they can’t be trusted to do it. Probably has some sort of really bizarre and situational magical powers he is thoroughly unaware of. Qualified to be a licensed therapist. Made friends with Evil X at one point, somehow.

Zloy

Like Cleo, he’s a ghost possessing a corpse. Unlike Cleo, there’s a good chance it’s not his corpse. Eh, it’s not like anyone else was using it. Runs a blog with Pixl, because why not. Was already a zombie when he met Pixl, who was still alive at the time. His body is a bit more decayed than Cleo’s, but it’s fine. His goggles are enchanted with the same preservation spell; it’s not really ever explained where he got them from. Has no regard for privacy but is fortunately unable to turn invisible or phase through walls due to inhabiting a physical body. Both can theoretically physically fight ghosts and has enough time to physically fight ghosts, meaning he would be a valuable ally if he could be bothered. Lives in a graveyard. Has an ongoing ‘feud’ with Cleo, in which he puts jabs at her on the blog. Once spent a week as a (very sarcastic) floating potato.

Hermiton

Is the name of the place they all live in/near. Located in an ambiguous location in an ambiguous country, Hermiton is technically large enough to be considered a city but has Town VibesTM. Supernatural going-ons are a fairly normal part of life, and a good number of inhabitants aren’t humans. Despite this, the wider world seems mostly ignorant of the existence of ghosts, magic, etc. I’m not too sure about geography, but it’s surrounded by forest in most directions and in a warm enough climate to not have snow in the winter (so Python doesn’t, you know, freeze to death). Most people don’t tend to bat an eyelid at strange-looking people walking down the street or serving them at the store; they’re used to it by now. There are several theories as to why Hermiton specifically has so much going on when it comes to the supernatural- ley lines, secretly the resting place of some long-forgotten god, et cetera- but it’s actually more of a case of ‘people who have supernatural traits hear rumours of a place where a lot of people have supernatural traits and go there in search of answers/a place to belong’. This doesn’t exactly explain where all the ghosts came from, but hey. Nothing’s perfect.

[inhalareexhalare]

“Let Him First Cast a Stone at Her”

Two occurrences in this early morning:

(1) I brushed off Ms. Len when she asked if I could deal with her bank deposit on my way, since yesterday I experienced the worst long wait ever. That particular bank has poor manpower and technology. Now I regret letting that opportunity to help pass me by.

(2) Reyna’s all anxious again from her mistakes at work. She thinks they’re minor and careless, but it’s exactly the simplicity of the mistakes that makes her feel bad about herself. Simple mistakes that she could have avoided, she thinks.

To Reyna:

Kung may mag-judge man sa iyo, sabihin mo walang kwenta siya JK HAHA

[If anyone ever judges you tell them they’re fucking useless JUST KIDDING HAHA]

Sabi nga ni Jesus sa Christianity, "He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her."

[Jesus of Christianity did say,...]

Remember, walang may karapatan na husgahan ka. Ginagawa mo ang pinaka-best mo, at alam mo yan.

[Remember, nobody has the right to judge you. You do the very best that you can, and you know it.]

Pero kung gusto mo ng improvement anyway, pwede mong i-note nalang yun para new habit na haha "always doublecheck" :) Malamang magkakamali ka pa rin kasi di naman tayo robot, pero magiging mas konti na probably ang frequency! :D

[But if you want to work on self-improvement anyway, you can note it instead to turn it into a new habit haha “always double-check” :) You will certainly still make mistakes since we aren’t robots, but you’ll probably less frequently miss it! :D]

I still feel bad about Ms. Len hahahuhu

Oh wait! She responded in e-mail! Yay she would like to take my re-offer of doing that deposit (as long as it’s on the wayy)

From Ms. Len:

Wait for a moment.I will go there.Thank you very much.

To Ms. Len:

Thank you so much for taking the trouble! Noted!

2019-02-28 08:40 Philippines Thursday

I.. 

I am seriously trembling, fuck.

I am overwhelmed with excitement as I crave for this social development.

Ms. Len and I hugged. She said sorry for the trouble, but that she also really appreciates it, because two secretaries that sit adjacent to her cubicle like to pick on her schedule. They spread weird rumors about her taking too long with errands (and are suspecting that Ms. Len is busy chatting with people and having fun despite it being the time for work.) 

So this is quite a help in saving her time. I told her not to mind them. I love them as individuals, but they’re letting their perspectives run over Ms. Len this time. Those two are known for having less responsibilities as Ms. Len as people also say that they are unreliable or slow. Which makes them not understand how Ms. Len can possibly have so much errands/responsibilities to be running out and back to office the whole day.

For people who some others belittle, they should understand what Ms. Len must be feeling if they just try. :<

People just like to pick on other people. Especially if they don’t think getting to know others better is worth their time. Let’s try to break the cycle, shall we?

2019-02-28 09:32 Philippines Thursday

I ran into Richel, one of my cousins, who is now in her early college years. I was able to properly express my pleasant surprise. It’s been so long that I thought we’d have a lot of troublesome ice to thaw between us but hey, we were good. I told her that I missed her (and I didn’t know that until I said it), and she met me with similar enthusiasm and told me that she and her family would actually love to have lunch together with me someday.

I thought I’d be allergic to her since ever since I left home, I hid from my relatives ( I didn’t like to be talked about or pried on, and I didn’t want unnecessary burden on my dad and everyone although I think this absence of mine might have just worsened the gossip fuel haha) But we were cool. She didn’t know how to talk to me but in the spur of the moment I initiated so that was a surprise.

I wonder if I should take them up on that offer? I dislike feeling like I have to explain myself, but isn’t that exactly what socializing is about? Helping each other understand each other?

Okay, a part of me still doesn’t want to, but I guess I should. If they initiate of course. I am technically sent the invitation through someone else’s intention, but I don’t want this gathering to be started by me because then it would be as if I want to push my ideas onto them.

Nevertheless:

Mission: Share Your Opinion.

2019-02-28 11:27 Philippines Thursday

Waaah. I couldn’t share my opinions at our meeting. I couldn’t even speak up or make a sound. Even when Dr. Virg started lightening up to me with jokes on my silence.

I just didn’t know what to say. I couldn’t relate to them. Worse, I couldn’t find my voice. My voice was also weak even when it was Dr. Seth asking. I guess the whole, general air can give so much effect on comfort. I saw them somewhat as a group of people I couldn’t relate to. 

Retirement? Salary? Nationwide competition? The only thing I could relate to was that scandal they talked about around a certain graduate who lied for years to their parents regarding studies and even graduation. That student made up a lot of stories which sounds so familiar to me because my brother did that before. 

So I could only empathize. Troubled, repressed individuals who don’t know who to go to for help. Or just plainly can’t because they’re no t used to asking for help.

I couldn’t speak because I’d just be adding fuel to their gossip. 

I had no idea what to do at all, although I did my job right when it’s about business.

I don’t understand what Dr. Virg and some others in the room expect from me. If they were in my position, I wonder what they would talk about? I could be the clown/joker and say some pretty stupid things just to get a laugh and a level of comfort, but that wouldn’t be me.

Hm. Whatcha think, reader?

I really believe now that small talk is important, but what could I possibly talk about? I’m clueless here...

All I can think of for now, is improve the volume of my voice. Be adventurous with it. Don’t let their expectations intimidate you.

But I’m severely lacking in improvisation in this case. Strange. 

Do I really just lack information? Is that it? But their topics are too irrelevant to me.

Seriously, what do you say to:

“Ey, Lobo. You and Phoebe should be hosts to this event. Haha!”

Don’t worry it wasn’t an attack. Or at least that’s how I heard it. Phoebe is an apparently soft-spoken staff member. I could only smile or chuckle along.

I have no idea what to say. Hm. If I do have to give an opinion though, I’d ask if the event was undercover because I’m too quiet to host it. I wonder if they’d relate though. I have pretty weird contextual language, just like anyone does when there’s a huge gap in culture.

What if, instead, I say, then the event would be chaos, because I'd make a pretty speechless and therefore powerless host. Hosts exist to control the flow. I exist to observe the flow.

...

...too serious? This has always been a kind of problem haha

I like this part of me, but most don’t relate.

But I think I’ll try my second idea next time. My way of showing affection is adding some flavor and insight into things.

-

WAIT. I think I found another hole. I’m too busy looking for a short response, since I know they don’t think of me highly yet for me to steal more than a minute out of one turn.

(1) Do they actually think that? If so, there’s nothing to do about it. I can only shut up, or be fake.

(2) Maybe they don’t think that. If so, then I should give myself a push and try.

(3) The truth is that I really just don’t know what they think; So I must try, and keep trying. Unless it’s really evident that (1) is true, then that’s the time I drop it.

I should give it tries.

Mission: Steal Time, Test Waters!

But I still think I wouldn’t have gotten this idea at the time, since I keep thinking about the comfort levels of the other speaker and what they are probably expecting out of me. So, a revision of the previous mission:

Mission: Share Your Opinion (Think Underlying Concepts)

2019-02-28 15:14 Philippines Thursday

Huh. I don't feel so attached to Karu now, even though it's nighttime.

I'm actually pretty happy and excited on my own.

I'm genuinely excited for his gig tonight and for his net gigs, and for his new flute!

Even though I won't get to hear it until maybe a weekend morning.

You know what? I don't feel bad at all. I watched a few short films, snd then manga, and then pondered for a bit on what I could develop in that collab story I have with Nynaeve.

And I'm going to bed pretty darn happy.

I am absolutely comfortable right now.

Hm.

It feels so free to rid yourself of unnecessary reins.

Chains that shackle unnecessary burdens like self-expectations, obsessions, self-depreciation, etc...

Why did I want Karu home at night before again?

The anxiety was triggered by extreme loneliness and envy. Unforgiving to myself for having such feelings, I would beat myself up and fixate on things about myself, and then I wouldn't be able to stop with the obsessive thinking if I didn't remember to do my calm spell and breathing exercise.

Now, I just have peace. Freedom. So much freedom that I find it easy to set other people free. Set Karu free.

I guess it's hard to find peace if you're looking for it. Peace is in everything around you; in everything that taught you important lessons; in everything that you love to do; in everything that you discover new.

You don't do tricks and hacks to get the peace of mind that you crave for; you just do things for reasons that actually matter to you—you do things for getting better, and for growing up.

Don't rush it, but don't delay it.

Don't resist it.

Literally be yourself and always find ways to enhance yourself.

This was Pa's truest words, when he wasn't held down so much by the pressures of society: (I was crying tears at the age of 19, having experienced my first of societal/social failures—flunking a subject.)

"I don't need you to be the best out of everyone. I want you to be the best of yourself."

2019-02-28 22:41 Philippines Thursday

What is this. I'm still not afraid of getting up in the morning!

Because how do I know it’s all gonna work out? I don’t.

Focus. IT'S A LEAP OF FAITH.

2019-03-01 06:00 Philippines Friday

PS watch Spider-man: Into the Spider-verse!

[xialing-gf]

you’re singing it wrong: chapter 2 (peter parker x reader)

Chapter 1

Summary: staying with your uncle tony resulted in something unexpected

How convenient was it that your parents had to travel to Europe to take care of some business in the central headquarters of their company for a month? And how even more convenient as it that they had to leave you with Uncle Tony because the last time you were home alone for a week, you almost burned down the apartment building by overheating popcorn? You didn’t really know Uncle Tony that well as he was very distantly related and you rarely saw him since he didn’t exactly show up at family reunions such as Thanksgiving. So when your parents told you that you would be staying with Uncle Tony, your reaction was, “Who?”

“You know, Uncle Tony. That one uncle you don’t get to see much who’s super rich and is more into technology than you,” Your mom had replied, rolling her eyes at your obliviousness. You had a week to pack for a month’s stay at Tony’s house, resulting in a less than thrilled attitude towards staying with a man you didn’t even know that well. If you were still friends with MJ, you would’ve complained about the whole situation but you had nobody to talk to so you busied yourself with designing an unreasonable amount of gadgets. If Uncle Tony was as innovative as your parents made him out to be, maybe he could help you with a few of your projects.

The day came way too fast for your liking; before you could spell out “pineapple” the week was over and your parents were dropping you off in front of this office building with a giant “A” on the side, claiming that it was Uncle Tony’s house. “Are you sure this is where he lives? This looks like a-” You stopped yourself mid-sentence when somebody placed a firm hand on your shoulder. You turned your head around to find a very familiar-looking man standing behind you. He had a sported sunglasses and a suit that complimented his goatee.

“Hello Kristen, long time no see,” The man (Uncle Tony?) smiled at your mother and nodded at your father.

“Nice to see you too Tony. You’ll take good care of her, right?” Your mom furrowed her brows in worry as she asked.

“Of course I will! She’ll be in the safest room there is on Earth! Now go do your thing, I’ve got Y/N now,” He barely gave you enough time to wave goodbye to your parents before guiding you into the elevator. You clutched the handle of your suitcase nervously in one hand while your other hand was wrapped around the strap of your backpack as the elevator began moving upwards.

“Okay, listen kid: your parents worry too much about you but you’ll be fine if you stay in the tower. According to my sister- sorry I meant your mom, you got my tech-savvy genes so you can stay in one of the labs. I don’t use that lab much so you can do whatever you want in it except for making explosives. That’s a big no. Other than that, do whatever you want,” Uncle Tony explained as you headed towards your room for the time being. Your jaw could’ve dropped right through the floor if you didn’t control your muscles.

Your new room was a fancy lab full of whirring machines and complex gadgets lying on tables. There was a bed in the corner of the room and a closet that was obviously squished in just for you. So many tools were lying around and unfinished gear was everywhere. It was the room of your dreams and when you opened your mouth to thank Uncle Tony, he answered you before the words could come out, “It’s nothing really. Don’t thank me. Dinner’s at 6:30. Feel free to show yourself around. Actually, I’ll ask my intern to show you around.”

With that, he disappeared down the hall, leaving you shell-shocked. You set your luggage down and completely ignored the idea of unpacking as you inspected every single aspect of the room you could. If your parents found out about all the dangerous tools in the room, they’d lose their minds. You were checking out an insanely durable shield when the intern knocked on the door.

“Hey, so Mr. Stark wanted- wait, do I know you?” You jerked your head upwards in surprise to find Peter Parker standing in your doorway, with a shocked expression on his face. The last time you spoke to him was when he was asking you to fix his web shooter and you rarely talked to him.

“Peter?” You fumbled with the shield, almost dropping it on your toe like the clumsy egghead you were.

“Y/N? Y-you’re Mr. Stark’s cousin?” Peter ran his fingers through his hair and appeared to be extremely flustered. If you were going to have to deal with him for the rest of this month, you might as well get used to dealing with him.

“Yep, and I guess you’re his intern so you’re stuck with me,” You dropped the shield and walked out the door. “Well, are you just gonna stand there and let me be my own tour guide or what?”

“Oh, yeah, yep. Um, so this is just all the labs and stuff. I’m not usually let in here because everybody’s afraid I’ll break something,” Peter chuckled to himself and you peeked in through the half-opened door to check out the other labs. “Who’s everybody else?” You questioned, frowning at the strange objects in a lab, wondering if those were materials from Earth.

“Oh, the Avengers. You know, like Bruce Banner, War Machine, Scarlet Witch, Black Widow, Hawkeye, Captain America-”

“Wait, the Avengers? Like those superhero guys who save the day and stuff? Wait, then wait… oh does that mean… oh my goD!” The realization hit you mid-sentence when you matched up the name Tony to Tony Stark and then Tony Stark to Iron Man. Your parents didn’t tell you that your uncle was the Tony Stark, as in Tony Stark the billionaire and superhero.

“Dude, how did you not know that your uncle is Iron Man?” Peter stifled a laugh at your reaction.

“My parents never told me he was! He never visits! How was I supposed to know?” You were tempted to throw a punch at Peter’s pretty face but decided against it since punching an Avenger on the first day would definitely make a bad impression.

“He’s your uncle! You should’ve known!” Peter exclaimed and you froze in place when you saw a group of people staring blatantly at you and Peter. They were sitting on the couch and talking but paused when you walked in.

“Are you Stark’s niece?” The girl dressed in red holding the red-faced robot’s hand asked, giving you a cautious glare. You felt kind of bad not knowing the names and faces of the team that saved everybody in New York but to be fair, school never taught anything useful.

“Uh, yeah. I’m Y/N. Who are you?” The man with dark colored hair chuckled under his breath and the rest of the team glanced at each other with confused looks. Peter was standing next to you with the most embarrassed look on his face.

“Oh, is this the girl you were talking about Peter? You showed us a picture of her the other day! She’s the one who helped you fix your web-shooter because you were too scared to tell Tony that you broke it? And the girl who taught you how to use Snapchat filters?” The middle-aged man with greyish hair smirked at Peter as the red robot asked.

“I think it is,” The woman in black grinned and everybody burst out laughing except for you and Peter. You were just very confused about the current situation that was happening while Peter seemed to want to hide underneath a large pile of hay.

“You know what? Let me show you around the place first and you can meet the others later at dinner,” Peter guided you away from the cackling adults with a gentle hand on your shoulder. Just as you two were heading down the next hall, one of the men shouted, “Parker, if you show her to your room, better keep it quiet!” Another wave of laughter rang through the room and Peter shook his head, his face redder than an apple. You were going to ask him about why he would tell the people about you but he busied himself with explaining what each room was for. The building held a lot more than you expected; there was a training center and a lot of bedrooms as well as office rooms.

Peter could not have been more relieved when you told him you wanted to eat dinner in your room. You fixed yourself a nice meal of mac and cheese and locked yourself in your room to work on the mechanical flower. Even the thick walls couldn’t block out the loud laughter of the others while they were eating dinner. You knew it was wrong of you to act on your anti-social instincts but you really wanted to finish as many projects when you had access to this huge amount of resources. You also discovered that there was an AI in the room who could help you out and you decided to name her Liv.

“Liv, open the door, please!” You called when somebody knocked on the door, your hands occupied with bending wires. Looking up from your creation, you found Uncle Tony with his arms crossed, watching you work.

“Hey kid, are you gonna join us for dinner? The team really wants to meet you,” He tilted his head towards the direction of the conversation outside. You twisted a wire into place and stood up straight.

“Maybe tomorrow. Thanks for the offer though,” You smiled before working on bending a petal into the correct shape with pliers.

“Your mom wasn’t lying, huh? You really like to create,” Your uncle critically inspected your work from afar. “Well, feel free to take a look at my suits whenever. I’ll be heading back to dinner.”

With that, he left you to work until 2 in the morning. Needless to say, you were exhausted the next day at school. You could barely keep yourself awake and relied on coffee to stay somewhat alert. During the lunch break, you stopped by the cafeteria only to get lunch (surprisingly, you forgot to pack lunch since you almost missed the bus) and had planned to head to the robotics room per usual but Peter invited you to sit at the lunch table with him and Ned. Luckily, Michelle was nowhere to be seen so it made the whole situation a little less awkward.

You introduced yourself to the Avengers officially later that evening and matched up their real names to their superhero names. You also met Pepper, Tony’s wife, who was extremely sweet and you became more comfortable around everybody after a few days. When Tony had time to spare, he taught you advanced programming methods and offered advice on improvement for your projects. At one point, he even welcomed you to criticise and improve one of the new suits he was designing.

Natasha taught you a couple of self-defense moves during the weekend and you showed your projects to Bucky, who was a lot kinder than his appearance carved him out to be. You told Steve how girls at Midtown still crushed on Captain America and laughed at Bruce’s ridiculous, spontaneous jokes. You listened to the stories Wanda and Vision told you and learned how to shoot a bow and arrow from Clint’s brief but helpful lesson. Although you spent lots of time with each Avenger, you would have to say that you were closest to Peter.

Peter started to talk to you at school more often and helped you with homework at night. He would constantly be loudly teased by the other heroes about having a crush on you which made the situation uncomfortable but you always found a way to lighten the mood. You had to admit, you were developing a strong liking for that boy. He was adorable when he was flustered and stumbled over words. He was always willing to help and he was one of the few people with genuinely kind hearts that you’ve met.

You decided against going to the Avengers to ask for advice and seeing as you had no other people to go to, you decided to talk with Liv for help. Even though she was an AI without human emotions, she searched the worldwide database for dating advice.

“I don’t know Liv, he’s cute and I really like him, what should I do?” You sighed as you stared up the ceiling, fiddling with the mechanical flower you finally completed. Pressing the rose shaped button you carved yourself, the flower’s petals opened up to reveal an empty center.

“The best way to get to someone better is to go on a date with them. You should ask him to go hiking with you or get coffee with you. Scientifically, choosing a low-stress location will be best for you two to get to know each other. Eating food together has also been proven to imply intimacy,” Liv explained from her corner of the room and you sighed as you inspected the flower to make sure every part was intact. “Also, if you wish to engage in any sexual activities with him, you should-”

“Liv! No! The date stuff is good enough!” You interrupted her, wishing that she could speak just a little bit softer. “Go take a break. I need some time.” The whooshing sound of Liv shutting herself down was the only sound you heard in the complete silence of the night. You had the nerve to ask Peter out but you didn’t know how to. You didn’t want to ask him in person because that’d be equally as awkward for the both of you so you decided to do it the old school way: write him a note.

You grabbed a post-it note and wrote down, “Hey, do you want to go grab some coffee Friday after school? - Y/N” and drew two boxes, one with “no thanks” next to it and the other with “sure”. You folded it into a small paper airplane and placed it in the core of the flower. As the flower closed shut with the press of a button, you quickly grabbed another post-it note and wrote “press the button for a surprise!” on it before grabbing the note and the flower.

You silently snuck down the hall and opened up Peter’s room. Luckily, he was sound asleep (like any normal person would be at 1 in the morning) and you gently placed the flower and note on his table before sneaking back into your room.

In the morning, you were greeted with the flower and when you opened it up, there was a checkmark in the “sure” box on the note. Maybe you should tell people that they were singing lyrics wrong more often.