#former sirius x reader
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ourloveisforthelovely · 2 years ago
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House of Black Part 7
Regulus Black AU
Request: Regulus and his wife are raising Sirius’ daughter after he ends up in Azkaban. Now after his escape Sirius comes to them to thank them and get to know his daughter.
Pairings: Regulus Black x Reader. Former Sirius x Reader
Link to Part 6
Rating- M 
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Sirius waited a few moments before tentatively getting up and sneaking after Regulus. He peaked around the corner as Regulus lightly knocked on the closed door.
“Who is it?”
Abby’s tearfully strained voice came from the other side as Regulus turned to look at Sirius. Giving his older brother a look that said “fuck off” Regulus turned back to worry about his daughter.
“It's me.”
He replied in his calm composed voice. The door opened after a few moments and Abby stepped out quickly wrapping her arms around Regulus’ waist. Sirius, meanwhile, was waiting for Regulus to shove her away and mutter something about too many feelings…however, he didn’t. Regulus simply wrapped his arms around Abby and gently patted her back.
“There, there, darling. I know this wasn’t at all what you wanted.”
“Why would I want to be sentenced to 35 years of monthly inconvenience?”
Abby grumbled. Regulus had to choke back a giggle.
“You sound like your mother and I don’t blame you. I wouldn’t be looking forward to that either. Now, do we need to go to the store?”
Abby shook her head.
“Mum has been preparing for this for ages.”
Regulus was once again thankful for your superb planning skills. You were always prepared for everything. For this particular event, Regulus made a note to forever be thankful for your planning even more. While he had been down the “feminine hygiene” aisle plenty of times in the years that he had been married to you that didn’t mean that he enjoyed it nor would have the slightest idea what to get Abby.
“Of course, she has. Your mum likes chocolate at this particular time. Want me to go get something?”
Abby nodded, sobbing a little more.
“That would be nice.”
Regulus gently patted Abby’s back once more.
“Now, go lie down. I’ll let you know when I get home. I’ll also keep the clueless one away as long as I can.”
Abby sighed.
“Thanks, Dad.”
Regulus waited until the door was closed before turning and going back to where Sirius stood peaking around the corner.
“Don’t worry, you cowering wimp, I took care of it. Once again, it is I who always comes to your aid to get your stupid self out of trouble. You are welcome.”
Sirius gave Regulus a scowl as his younger brother turned and walked from the house without another word.
Half an hour later, you stepped into Grimmauld Place and closed the door behind you. Looking around the room, you made a mental note of how quiet the room was. You could only hope that Regulus had killed Sirius while you were away. The last thing that you wanted to do was clean up that mess and come up with an explanation for the Order.
“Hey it's you”
You looked up at Sirius as you walked into the kitchen.
“Hey, it's you too. I see Regulus didn’t kill you while I was away.”
You had to stop yourself from laughing at the look of offense on Sirius’ face.
“Look, I may be clueless but that doesn’t make him the genius of being a perfect father and knowing how to deal with all women’s issues!”
You stared at Sirius for a few moments trying to figure out what the hell the man was talking about but could come up with nothing.
“What are you talking about?”
Sirius blinked back at you. He wanted to congratulate himself for once again putting his foot in his mouth. Judging the expression on your face you were totally not in on the “know” about what had been happening at Grimmauld Place that morning.
“Did Regulus not tell you?”
“Tell me what? What are you on about?”
Sirius groaned before sitting down.
“Abby started her…you know that thing that women have and men don’t.”
Your face went blood white.
“Merlin, she started her period. Oh, the poor thing. Sirius, please tell me that you didn’t handle that situation.”
You were relieved when Sirius shook his head.
“Thank Merlin.”
You murmured and went to the refrigerator to get a drink. Sirius didn’t move from his place.
“How did you do it, Y/n?”
You turned back to your brother-in-law with a frown.
“Do what?”
“Get that stick out of Regulus’ ass and teach him to deal with emotion? He handled that like a champ.”
You chuckled before taking a sip of your drink.
“He certainly didn’t come that way. I had to undo all of that shit your mother did to him. The years of pureblood garbage and your father’s lack of basic understanding of how a woman works. Once I knocked all of that shit down, Regulus was like a perfect little lump of clay. There was also the fact that he was willing to change for me…and for Abby. He did not want her growing up in a house like the one the two of you were raised in.”
Sirius was silent for a moment before looking at your face. The years hadn’t changed you. You were still the same beautiful person that you had always been…the beautiful person with the acid tongue.
“I never thanked you.”
He said idly.
“Taking care of Abby when you didn’t have to. Also for taking care of Regulus…while he and I may not be best buddies anymore…he is still my brother and I always worried about who he would end up with. I knew that person would either bring out the best or the worst in him. You definitely brought out the best. I suppose I also want to apologize to you for how I did you. I never should have cheated. You didn’t deserve that.”
Putting your drink down, you moved to sit down in front of Sirius. For once, it felt like you were talking to your old friend again. It felt like being back in school and calling Sirius on whatever shit he had done wrong that day.
“Sirius, I forgave you for that a long time ago. While at the time, I absolutely hated you for it…Now I thank you. Sirius, if we ended up together neither of us would have been happy. I’m with who I needed to be with. Regulus is the person that I needed to be with. As far as Abby, I would never have let her go to an orphanage or some horrible place. She’s my niece and I would never turn her away.”
The front door opening and closing ended the conversation. Regulus walked into the room with a frown on his face that vanished when he saw you.
“I suppose you heard the news.”
You moved to wrap your arms around Regulus’ neck. Neither of you chose to notice Sirius watching with an annoyed expression on his face. It didn’t matter that he apologized a few moments before. Part of him would always be salty over you choosing Regulus over him. It didn’t matter that you had every logical reason to choose Regulus over him…it still would hurt a little seeing you so happy with someone else.
“I did. I also heard that you handled everything well.”
Regulus groaned.
“Ugh…that debatable. I hit her with the there, there darling and, as with you, it works wonders.”
You giggled and moved to kiss Regulus once more.
“I’ll go deal with Abby.”
Regulus waited until you were out of the room before going back to his abandoned newspaper. He had got a few articles in before Sirius started talking yet again
“You’ve changed.”
Regulus waited a moment before meeting his brother’s gaze.
“I did because I had to. I did because if I didn’t change I would have lost Y/n to someone else and I was not about to let that happen. She is too special of a woman to let go.”
Sirius chose to let that little dig go instead of fighting Regulus on it. He knew that Regulus would take any chance that he could to let remind Sirius of how he had done you.
“Yeah, she is. I just never expected you to go against the family for a woman. How did they react when you married her?”
Regulus put his newspaper down, finally giving up.
“Mother didn’t like it. She pitched a fit until I told her how things were going to be. She grew to actually be fond of Y/n. Father absolutely adored everything about her. I am sure when he came to visit it wasn’t to see me but to see Y/n. You know that father wanted a daughter and instead got me.”
Sirius couldn’t help the scowl that came over his face.
“There is nothing wrong with you. Father just had a big old stick up his ass.”
Regulus took a breath. The last thing that he really wanted to do was think about his childhood. Regulus hated living it once. Going back and thinking about it a second time was more than he could really handle. Moving to stand up, Regulus turned back to Sirius.
“Stick up his ass or not, he had not reason to treat us the way that he did. I think Y/n is calling me.”
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moonstruckme · 2 months ago
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remus one shot where he can’t stop blushing around the reader because he has a huge crush on her and sirius and james are like dude please ask her out already?? 🙈
cw: the trials and tribulations of a restaurant job, semi-confident reader (or at least she can withstand Sirius' flirting, which I couldn't), James and Sirius' shameless wingmanning
shy!Remus x fem!reader ♡ 1.1k words
The cafe is crammed. You’ve almost tripped over two kids already whose parents let them run loose, you did let a glass slip from your tray when a customer stuck his leg out into the walkway without looking, and you’ve quickly reached the conclusion that today was definitely the wrong day to break in your new work shoes. You’re on your last straw at only ten in the morning, but your pasted-on smile becomes twice as genuine when you see a table of your favorite regulars. 
“Hi,” you say warmly, clicking your pen and readying it above your pad. “How are we doing today?” 
You’re greeted with two dazzling grins from one side of the booth and a shyer smile from the other. 
“Y/n,” says Sirius, in his suave, flirtatious way (you’ve learned not to take it personally), “you’re looking stunning.” 
You know your hair is suffering from the weather outside and there’s orange juice down the front of your apron, but you smile at him anyway. “Thank you, so are you.” 
“How’s your morning going?” James asks. These boys are never ones to skip over pleasantries to get to their meal, and while with other tables you might try to hurry them along, you never mind in this case. Today especially, you welcome the break. 
“Oh, it’s going,” you try to joke, looking pointedly down at your orange juice stain. “Could be worse.” 
He makes a face. “Yikes.” 
“It’s fine,” you say breezily. “What can I get you?” 
You look to James, because really he’s the only one you ever need to ask. The other two are fairly consistent, but James seems inclined to try something new every time he comes in. 
He doesn’t disappoint now, locking eyes with you seriously over the top of his menu. “How is your butterfly lemonade? No—actually, what is your butterfly lemonade?”
“It’s…” You bite your lip, thinking. Sirius snickers, and when you look he seems to be sharing in some joke with Remus’, whose cheeks have gone a tad pink. “I’m not sure, honestly, but it’s sweet. I think you’d like it.” 
“That, then.” James slaps down his menu decisively. 
“Right.” You write it down. “And then, a caramel latte and a tea?” You look to Sirius and Remus for confirmation. 
The former shoots you a grin you take as a yes, while the latter nods and says quietly, “Thank you.” 
“No problem.” You soften your smile for Remus. You adore all of these boys, but you have a bit of a tender spot for him. Remus is by far the quietest of his friends, though really just as friendly when he does talk. It’s terribly endearing. 
You click your pen again. “Okay, back soon!” 
The boys’ table remains a bright spot in your morning for as long as they’re there. Their antics you’re rather used to—the flirting, and the pranks, and the teasing way both James and Sirius poke at Remus while his blush worsens and worsens—but it surprises a laugh out of you when you joke that you’ll have to spit in Remus’ food if he orders the brioche (which infamously holds up the kitchen every time) and Sirius snorts doubt he’d mind before yelping and jumping in his seat. By the time you’re bringing them their ticket, the cafe has reached its late morning lull and your day is remarkably brighter than it started off. 
You seem to be interrupting some sort of debate when you approach their table, Remus leaning forward to whisper across the booth before he catches sight of you and sits back. The tops of his cheekbones are tinged pink. Sirius, on the other hand, is grinning wickedly, whereas James looks mostly exasperated. 
“Thank you,” James says kindly, taking the ticket from you. Remus starts rifling through his pockets for cash, but Sirius only looks at you as though sizing you up. 
“Y/n,” he starts to say, ignoring how Remus’ eyes narrow in his direction, “are you seeing anyone at the moment?” 
You feel your eyebrows lift. “Not currently, no.” 
“But why not?” He affects a look of puzzled contemplation, propping his chin on his hand. “You’re a pretty girl. Are you not looking to date?” 
You shrug, fighting the urge to cross your arms defensively. It’s not that you’ve never gotten these sorts of personal questions from customers before, but you weren’t expecting them from this table; you thought you knew better than to take Sirius’ flirting seriously. “Nothing has come up lately, I guess.” 
“Do you fancy men?”
“Sirius,” Remus hisses. “Leave her alone.” 
“What?” Sirius spreads his hands, guileless. “None of us would care if you didn’t, lovely—well, some might care, but no one would hold it against you—” He yelps for the second time today, this time shooting a glare at his friend across the booth. “Anyway, you don’t have to say if you aren’t comfortable.” 
You’re laughing a bit now, half nervously. “No, that’s okay. I do, yeah.” 
“Interesting.” James sets down the ticket. It seems you have his full attention now. “And what do you think of our Remus?” 
Remus makes a horrified sputtering sound, and you turn to find him looking at James in betrayal. He’s pink to the tips of his ears. 
You can’t help a small smile as you catch on. “I think he seems very sweet.” 
“Mm, well spotted.” James nods, tenting his hands like a man at a business meeting. 
“Yes, very good taste,” Sirius agrees. 
“He’s a dateable bloke, no?” James asks you. He jolts in his seat a little, but doesn’t yelp like Sirius had. Remus appears caught between wanting to hide his face in his hands and wanting to burn his friends to cinders with his gaze. He’ll be lucky, you think amusedly, if he doesn’t burn himself up first. The hue of his blush is only getting deeper. 
“He is,” you agree. You look at Remus again. This time, he meets your eyes, his look softening. 
“I’m so sorry,” he says miserably. 
Your grin spreads. “No, don’t be.” 
“So would you like to date him?” James furthers. 
Remus does put his head in his hands now, letting out a muffled groan. “James.” 
“What? Clearly you aren’t going to do it yourself, and I am sick of trying to eat my breakfast whilst you moon over—” He jumps in his seat again, and goes quiet, reaching down to rub at his leg. You tuck your lips in to hide a smile. 
“I’m just going to take this,” you say, reaching for the customer copy of their receipt. You bend over, scrawling your number down on the signature line. “And if anyone has more questions for me later, they can give me a ring. Okay?” 
You look at Remus. He looks nauseous and stop-sign red, but he manages to give you a small smile. “Alright,” he says, tentatively.
“Perfect. Bye, boys.” You shoot them a wave as you go to your next table. You hope Remus sees how your smile is really only for him.
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a-reverii · 1 year ago
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this is so adorable!!
Don’t Delete The Kisses
Part 1
Request: Hi! I absolutely love your writing and was wondering if I could request an imagine for young Sirius x reader on the song don’t delete the kisses by wolf Alice and possibly the video too? ❤
By: anonymous
Thanks for your request, dear anon, I really hope I did the job somewhat well because this song is so, so Sirius-like, great choice! Sorry it took me a while but it’s finally here, well, partly. I decided to split it in two because I got a bit carried away :) The second part will be up tomorrow. Hope you will enjoy this one!
I also thought I’d make it post-Hogwarts, because why not? ;)
Word count: 2,552
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You hated undergrounds and everything that went with them – crowds, no place to move a hand and noise that didn’t seem to ever end. As usual, you sighed at the entrance to the station, looking at all the people trying to fit into the doors and reluctantly stepped forward, getting into the flow. It was pouring rain and you, of course, didn’t have an umbrella, which added to the crowd pressing you on all sides and reduced the last bits of a good mood you had from a cup of coffee you finished five minutes ago.
Walking onto an escalator and meanwhile taking off your soaked jacket, you thought about it again. About the reason why three years ago you decided that after Hogwarts you won’t take any job in a magical world and stay in muggle London, working as a waitress in a small cafe in the very center. You didn’t abandon magic, no, it would be just stupid. But you were… tired? All the responsibilities that went with dealing with magic on daily basis scared you, so you made a decision to take a few years off. It was going great so far, you had learned lots of new things and almost forgot that some time ago you had a completely different life.
A push in the back made you flinch and turn around with widened eyes.
Keep reading
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robynlilyblack · 9 months ago
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Do you think I'm a monster?
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Remus Lupin x fem! hufflepuff! werewolf! reader
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Summary: After an eventful summer, Remus’ finds his girlfriend being distant, but it isn’t until the the next full moon he realises why
Warnings: swearing, mentions of eating, scars, greyback, violence, sex and nudity (non-sexual), kissing, established relationship, hurt/comfort
A/n: 4.1k words, I am back and taking requests, i haven’t written anything for over a year so things might be a little rusty, please bare with me as i get back into the groove of writing but I’m so happy to be back writing again, thank you so much for the request, enjoy ♡
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Navigation | Remus Lupin Masterlist
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Remus’ leg bobbed impatiently, eyes darting to the entrance everytime someone entered hoping it was you yet he was only met with disappointment. His mood did lighten as he saw his friends enter, chuckling as he watched James walk into the table as he tried to woo Lily.
“You alright?” he asks trying not to smile to hard as James groans 
“Eh it’s nothing” he cringes sitting opposite, Peter by his side, while Sirius plops himself down next to Remus “Did she laugh at least?” he ignores his pain and embarrassment, only thinking of the girl sitting little ways down from them now, giggling with Marlene and Alice
“Yeah Prongs, she laughed” he tells a little white lie, though he’s sure Lily probably did think it slightly adorable
“Where's your lovely lady?” Sirius asks, scanning the Hufflepuff table for you
Remus sighs “She hasn’t appeared yet” he knew you were probably catching up with your friends, they had both been away with their families travelling so you hadn’t seen them either…he’d never admit it but he was a tad jealous he wasn’t going to get to hug you first
“Oi” he’s pulled from his gloom by Sirius nudging him, pointing towards the door “Speak of the angel and there she shall appear” he grins, his point turning it’s a little wave at you and your friends
Remus lights up, heart warming at your shy smile and slight embarrassment when both Peter and James join in waving to you…in fact they couldn’t see but Marlene, Lily and Alice had all begun to wave as well. You grant them a small wave back as you head to find a seat, Amos joining you as he smiles at them, while Alex shoots a wink and a small salute, the former towards one particular marauder. 
“Happy now?” James grins at his friend
Remus nods bringing his gaze back to you as Dumbledore starts his speech, he barely listens, doubting it’s any more interesting this year than it has been the last six. Instead he admires you, he’d missed you so much, more than he realised in fact, the boy couldn’t take his eyes off you. His gaze drifted across your features, while he noted your face did look a little hollow, his mind had other ideas, asking you if you had been eating properly could come later, but for now his eyes fixated on your lips as he daydreamed about kissing you, touching you, f…
“Ha…best behaviour for the youngins…” Sirius brings him back to reality, chuckling to himself “...that’ll be right?” turning his gaze to him, before he starts to grin “Moony missin’ her too eh?” he wiggles his eyebrows noting Remus’ blown pupils and guilty look
If he wasn’t already bright in the face Remus was scarlet now “Shut up” he grumbles trying to compose himself, face riddled with embarrassment but it softens as he realises your looking over 
Hi, he mouths 
Hi, you mouth back with a small smile before turning your attention to the front once more but somethings off, he can feel it
You felt awful, every bone in your body ached, and it didn’t help that your skirt's waistband was rubbing against last month's scar. You were grateful none were too visible, the biggest were along your waist and hips from the initial attack, though there was one other on your arm, it could easily be written off as a fall or cat scratch, the former being the one used likely use as it lined up with a real fall you had written to Remus about over summer.
Remus
You sighed as you glanced over at him, finding his attention had finally moved back to his friends, most likely plotting their first prank of the year. It was easy to pretend in your letters, thankfully he hadn’t come looking for you on the train but you knew you would have to talk to him eventually. Would he know? Would he be able to sense you were now like him? Would he see you as he saw himself? Would he think you a monster?
Am I a monster now?
“Hey…” you’re broken out of your gaze, a soft hand finding your shoulder, followed by your friend's kind smile “...are you alright?” Alex asks, knowing something is wrong, just not what
“You can tell us anything” Amos adds, smiling on your other side “You’ve been quiet” and he was right, you’d barely said two words to them since kings cross that morning
How do I tell them? you think eyes welling 
“”Hey hey” Amos turns you around as you try to look away, making you face him “You don’t have to tell us…” he assures and you almost want to cry more, you had such wonderful friends “...but let us help you” 
“Anything you need, sunshine” Alex’s smile grows into a smirk “We do hugs, skipping out on welcome feasts early, hexes…” that one makes you giggle causing the two boys faces to light up
“Think we could start with a group hug?” you look up at them, the welling tears dissipating as they waste no time wrapping you up in a warm embrace
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“Love, wait up!”
You close your eyes, scrunching your face a little as you stop, trying to put on your best act as you turn back around to greet your boyfriend as he lightly jogs towards you
“Oh hi” you smile at him, playing dumb and pretending like you weren’t just trying to avoid him…again
Remus stops in front of you “I’ve been trying to catch you all day!” he laughs a little bit while you feel guilt swell in your stomach “Merlin I’ve missed you so much” he confesses right away 
Dammit, you think, finding yourself folding as you stare up at those big brown eyes of his, it didn’t help that your new little wolfy self was acting up either
You’d noticed the heightened senses, your hearing was impeccable now, and you finally understood why Remus was so prone to irritation, you almost smacked poor Amos in potions earlier for stirring the cauldron a little too loudly. Turns out smell was no different either, Remus smelled absolutely divine, and your wolf earned for him.
“Bun?” he gently prods and your heart breaks…you weren’t his bunny anymore
The realisation causes you to crumble, almost knocking him over as you wrap your arms around his torso, burying your face in his chest
He chuckles at that, oblivious to the turmoil inside “I’ll take that as you missed me too” he returns the hug, nose finding your hair
Merlin you smelled great, more so than normal, your pheromones always drove him nuts around the full moon but it was on overdrive now, so much so he finds himself gently shifting, unable to resist waiting to kiss you in a more private location as he brings one hand up to cup the back of your head, while he uses the other to guide your gaze back towards him, but as he moves in he notices the slight glisten in your eyes 
“Is something wrong?” he asks, large hands finding your cheeks 
You freeze, you never wanted to lie to Remus, you never thought yourself capable, and perhaps you aren’t not truely “I…I wish I could’ve spent the summer with you” it’s not a lie…because if you had, things would be just as they were and nothing would have to change 
His face softens to a downturned smile, his eyes looking at you with such love “You’re too sweet to me” he brings you back into a warm embrace “I promise we will next year” he tells you, and you squeeze him tighter
You might not want me next year
The next few days went slowly for both of you, you knew Remus had figured out you were avoiding him on purpose. Never before had you been so distant, especially before a full moon. It hurt so much, every time you crossed paths you wanted nothing more than to run to him, hold him, kiss him anywhere he was hurting but you couldn’t. You knew how the full moons affected your boyfriend, in fact you could feel it yourself, that desire to be close to the one you love, if you did go to his dorm as you normally did he would see the scars, he would see the bite mark, he would know you weren’t his sweet little bunny anymore.
You fell back on your bed, eyes glancing over to the clock, you would need to leave soon if you were to get deep enough into the woods. Your eyes started to water, you didn’t want to go, this was only your second moon and it was already unbearable 
You had never felt so alone…
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Remus was worried, you never came by to see him, it was so unlike you. These past few days had been so strange to him, he knew something must have happened, he also knew you hadn’t spoken to your friends about it as they seemed just as confused as he did, but whatever it was he couldn’t fix right now
“That's us set up” Sirius pokes his head in averting his eyes from Remus’ unclothed figure “I’m sure she has a good reason moons” 
Remus only nods, waiting until Sirius closes the door before reassuring himself  “She does…” he brings his legs up to his chest, wrapping his arms around them “...she loves us…” he gently rocks back and forth whispering “...she loves us”
Meanwhile Sirius makes it out of the willow, meeting James and Peter as they hide their bags for later “How is he?” Peter asks, looking forlorn as he notices his friend
“He’s putting on a brave face but…” Sirius shakes his head handing his and Remus’ bags to James “...he needs her” he puts simply
“I don’t understand why she didn’t come” James says, feeling genuinely confused as he reaches up to tuck away the last of the bags “Even when they’ve been in a fight she’s always shown up”
“Something must have happened” Peter looks to James “Maybe tomorrow we could go talk to her friends, surely they know” he suggests
James nods, hands finding his hips “Yeah…yeah that sounds good” he agrees, nodding a little more than was necessary in his worry “Sirius that a plan?” he and Peter look towards their friend only to find him looking somewhere between confused and concerned “Sirius?”
After a few more calls and one branch thrown at him Sirius finally responds “I…ugh…look” he can’t even form a sentence, doing a double take at his friends as he points towards the lining of the trees
James and Peter's eyes scan the area, widening with horror as they see you running towards the tree line. The trio look amongst themselves, their eyes doing the talking as they shift, they didn’t have much time to question why you were out here on tonight of all nights but they follow you into a small clearing, watching as you hang your bag on one of the branches, opening it up as you begin to take off your clothes.
Sirius makes a quiet grunt for only the boys to hear as they grasp you are fully stripping down causing them to all look at him instead of you as they give each other confused looks. However you never make it that far, it’s a scream that causes their heads to shoot back in your direction and they watch an all too familiar scene
You did have a good reason for not showing up tonight…and it shattered their hearts
They didn’t have much time to dwell. Sirius jumps into action first, attempting to distract you from clawing at yourself, while James slowly approaches behind with Peter sitting up on his back acting as a lookout for Remus as if you turned he surely couldn’t be far behind. 
You seem a little startled at first before stalking towards Sirius, you seem to note he isn’t scared of you, the boys watch as you calm, your body no longer tense, nor sensing you are in danger and so you let them guide you warily through the woods. In all honesty the boys had no idea what they were doing, they figured if you could sense that Sirius wasn’t a threat then maybe you and Remus would recognise each other as such as well…hopefully
As they came towards the clearing they could hear Remus as he whined in pain but the boys had no time to react as you already bolted off. Startled, they try to catch up, but as they move past the tree line they realise you’ve already made your way to him, growling. 
Shit
They’re eyes flick between one another, worried they had made the wrong choice until they watch Remus relax, the two of you sniffing around each other before you begin to lick his wounds and it dawns on them that you weren’t challenging him, you were berating him for hurting himself.
The rest of the moon went by smoothly, the best the boys had ever seen and it was all thanks to you. By the end Sirius and Peter had managed to herd you and Remus back into the willow while James headed back to get your bag
“I can’t believe it” Peter says in astonishment, sliding down the roots to sit at the entrance beside James “No wonder she’s been acting off”
James hums in agreement, fiddling with the strap of your bag “She doesn’t deserve this…neither of them do” he states, sadness washing over him “Man…this gonna break him when he wakes up, he loves her so much”
“He does…” the boys jump a little as Sirius reappears from the willow “I didn’t want to go in fully for y/n’s sake...but I’ve thrown the blanket in that general direction and well…it’s not like they haven’t seen it all before” he makes a face, chuckling softly with the other two as lowers himself to the ground to join them as they decide to try and get a little bit of sleep
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At first you didn’t know where you were, eyes opening slowly to survey your surroundings, you had expected to wake up in a ditch somewhere but not…wait. Your eyes widen, jolting up with a slight hiss as you look around, you were in the shack but if you were in the shack then that meant…
“Hey…” you jump a little at his voice, slowly turning to find Remus sitting just behind you, posted up against the wall, one leg half bent with his arm wrapped around it “...how are you feeling? Any pain?” he asks, strain evident in his voice, he looks broken and it kills you
You can only shake your head, slowly bringing the blanket up to cover yourself, shivering a little from the cold draft “Rem…” you say so quietly you’re not even sure you’ve said anything at all
“You’re cold” he states, wincing a little as he moves over to you, body still aching from from his own transformation “I’m okay, don’t worry” he assures, knowing exactly what you were thinking “Here” he pulls off his jumper “Hands up sweetheart” 
You do as you're told, allowing him to slip the jumper over your head. He was being so gentle with you, like you might shatter at a single touch, it shouldn’t have surprised you but it did, he must have seen the scars, he must see you differently now…he must…
“Do you think I’m a monster?” you whisper and his movements stop, eyes meeting yours in shock
He blinks at you a couple times before letting out a confused “What?”
Your eyes mist “Do you think I’m a monster?” you repeat, gaze never leaving his
“No” he shake his head firmly, hands finding yours “Never” he says almost harshly, stunned you would ever think such a thing 
“Really?” you eyebrows lift, hope and relief in your voice 
His eyes soften, confusion washing away as he finally sees it, and a bitter sense of deja vu falls over him. Almost a year ago to the day he sat in your position, looking up at you, asking if you fought him, a monster. He even remembers trying to convince you he was but you wouldn’t hear it, you refused to believe he was no matter what he said. In the end he stil didn’t believed it, but seeing you now, looking at you from the other position he realised just how stupid he had been, how much his own self hatred had made you scared to come to him, made you hate yourself the way he had all this time
“Really” he promises “Is…” he hesitates, because he’s almost certain he knows the answer “Is this why you've been avoiding me?” he asks, one hand slipping out of your own to softly cup your cheek
You lean into it, eyes fluttering as your own comes up to cup it “Yes” you confirm and he nods, looking in though “I’m so sorry…I…” he cuts you off 
“Don’t you dare” he warns “You aren’t turning into me, I won’t allow it” both hands are cupping your face now “You haven’t changed, not to me, okay? You are still my girl, still my bu-” but you cut him off this time
“But I’m not I-” you try to argue but Remus isn’t having it
“Stop” he gently shakes your face to regain your attention “You know why I started to call you bunny?” you shake your head “Because whenever you get excited you would do this little bounce, you do it when you’re excited to see me, geeking out about a new book and not to mention when we…” he blushes, stopping himself
You feel heat rush to your cheeks “Remmyy!” you gently shove him as you bounce a little in faux annoyance, causing you both to let out little laughs 
“There she is” he smiles at you, laughing more as you become self aware of your bounces, getting all shy before him “Nothing you could ever do would make me think you a monster. I’m so sorry bun, I never want you to talk about yourself the way I have, understood?”
You hum in agreement, nodding “...but that means you can’t be cruel to yourself either” you challenge him, holding your pinky up at him as a small smile gracing your face as you do
Remus clicks his tongue, of course you would use this as a way to help him love himself as well “Fine” he promises, taking your pinky “…now come ‘ere” he moves back to sit against the wall once more, patting his lap as he hithers for you to join him while you chew on your lip a little, shyly accepting the offer and moving to straddle his legs 
“There we go” he presses a lingering kiss to your hair, hands wrapping around you while your head falls into his chest “Better?”
“Much” you hum, savouring the moment before you lift your head “I suppose you must have some questions?” you wonder, hands finding his chest, fiddling with buttons of his shirt
“I do” he confesses, it was only natural “My attack is hazy for me now because I was so young…” he softly caresses your cheek “...but it’s fresh for you and I…I don’t want to pry, I can wait until you’re ready” he assures you
You take his hand, pressing a soft kiss to his palm “You remember I told you about my dads case? He was representing the family that was attacked much like you were?” you begin and Remus nods, hands moving to your hips, thumbs gently brushing beneath the hem of his jumper   
“Yeah, in your letters you said they got them all and your dad was taking you up north to celebrate?” he recalls but then his lips part “They didn’t get them all did they?”
You shake your head “Turns out their was a much bigger player, someone else behind the scenes who was pulling all the strings” you explain, eyes falling down to his chest, this is going to kill him
“Love…” he tries to guide you back to him “...who…” but as your eyes meet his and they tell all 
“Rem” you voice trembles a little
“Say it” he begs you
“Greyback” you whisper watching as Remus’ heartbreak sinks into rage, his grip on your hips tightening “Remmy…Rem…”
He doesn’t hear you say his name, everything around him fades as his anger grows. He never wanted to hear that name again, he never wanted to see that monster again but now? All he could think about was ripping him apart, taking away his freedom like he had done to so many, making him feel as weak and powerless as Remus had felt his whole life…how you would now feel your whole life
I’ll kill him
“Rem” you gently cup his face pulling back to you “Stay with me” you kiss him softly
His hands come up to meet yours “But he hurt you, cursed us to be in pain for the rest of our lives…and the worst part is he’ll be revelling in it all…that bastard…he…” his anger sinks into sadness at your comforting touch “he…” he pleads with you 
“He did and we don’t ever have to forgive him but we can't let him take away anything else from us either. He won’t ruin our lives”  you watch remus’ eyes soften and you smile at him trying to lighten the mood “Besides…there's always silver linings”
“And what would those be?” he tilts his head, struggling to see it
“Well…” you move your hands downward and kiss his cheeks “...if your senses are anything like mine I smell great” you giggle and he starts to smile, a loving gaze as he looks up at you “And perhaps more importantly…” you peck his nose making it scrunch in the most perfect way “...you’ll never worry about me during a full moon…” you nudge your nose against his “...and that fantasy you have of us living in your parents old cottage can be real, because…” you lean in close, lips grazing as your foreheads kiss “...you’ll never be alone again”
Remus’ heart feels like it might burst, you were right, there were silver linings. He had no idea what his life was going to be like after Hogwarts, he knew he couldn’t rely on his friends forever, nor could he have asked you to bear that responsibility alone, instead you and he would face it together, care for each other together…heal together
“Promise” he holds up his pinky 
You smile against his lips, wrapping you own pinky around it “Promise” and with that he closes the gap
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Thank you for reading ♡ (I promise my writing will get smoother again with time)
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daydreamingimagines · 1 month ago
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dogs, deers and rats?
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you tell sirius how you feel about dogs.... safe to say he gets much too defensive about it.
poly!marauders x reader
genre: fluff
words: 1.1k
a/n: this is repost, bc my acc got deleted, I will miss you 900 notes...
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"Hello-" before the words could leave your mouth, a limp body has thrown itself at you with a thump on the bed.
"Sirius, what the hell?" The words leave your mouth, but your hands find themselves in his hair as usual, removing strands of them from his face to see him more clearly. He looks up from where he had buried his face and leans to press his lips to yours. He breaks it off for a second just to say, "I missed you so much, my sweetest angel," and kisses you again.
"Oi, let us see her face too." says James as he settles himself beside Remus on the couch after he had draped a blanket over Remus. He didn't look that bad, but the tired and weary expression on his face was unmistakable.
You were treading water as you looked at Remus and extended a hand to beckon him to you, but Sirius was quick to snatch it to himself and say,
"No, first me, then you can do whatever." Sirius says as he wraps himself around you even closer, but you only laugh and say,
"Your time never ends, Sirius."
He lets out a scuff of disbelief before resorting to kissing your neck and shoulders, no answer to your accusation.
"What happened?" You ask James and Remus, breaking them from their conversation.
James was quick to answer, "Oh our dear Moony got himself into a tussle with this giant dog. Scratched him up a bit." For some odd reason, Remus only laughed at this.
"Oh my god, are you alright? Are you hurt?" You ask, your voice incredulous, mostly because that sounds like something Sirius, or James would do, not Remus.
Worry and annoyance both flooded your brain, but the former took over and you made a movement to get up and go towards Remus, but that was hard to do when you had a whole human being draped around you.
"Sirius, get off of me." He whined in defense and only tightened his grip and responded, "Don't worry about him, he's fine."
"I'm alright, sweetheart." Remus assures you from his seat, "And I'd rather just stretch for a while." He stretches his shoulders back and a groan of relief escapes him.
You take that as a confirmation and settle down, still skeptical of his answer. The silence doesn't go on for too long before you speak up,
"See, this is why I don't like dogs."
To someone else, it would've seemed like this was the biggest breaking news ever because Sirius stopped his ministrations and immediately distanced himself from you. Remus' eyebrows were raised with an amused smile, and James was looking directly at Sirius with a somewhat pitiful face.
"What did you say?" He asks, his voice flabbergasted.
You looked dumbfounded as if a deer in headlights by his dramatic question,
"I said I don't like dogs that much."
"Angel, how could you say that?" He asks, his eyes holding an expression of betrayal, a bit too dramatic.
You chuckle at his question, and say,
"I didn't know you had such dispositions for dogs." Your eyebrow raised in amusement as a smile adorned your lips.
James was pissing himself laughing on the couch, his hands clutching his chest to catch his breath. You looked at him, your expression amused and confused.
"How could you not like dogs? They're-" his hands fumble around as if to prove a point, "They're lovely!" You roll your eyes, having heard that argument, as if that's enough of an explanation.
"I'm not saying they're not lovely, they're just, you know," you shrug, "not for me."
Sirius' jaw hung open in disbelief and James was now on the half on the floor and half on the couch as his laugh got higher and higher.
"This is the funniest thing I will ever witness." He struggles to get out in between fits of laughter.
"What the hell is so funny?" You asked, feeling a bit out of the loop as to why this is such a big deal.
"It's just they're so clingy, and loud and obnoxious. I just want to come home and relax, and not have someone jumping through hoops for my attention." You continued to explain yourself, looking around for answers.
Now it was Remus' turn to release a bark of laughter as he joined James in his world. Tears had formed around Remus' eyes, his face red and James' glasses were nearly falling off, but he didn't seem to care. Remus could not get over how you had just described Sirius, just in a different form.
"Shut up, you two." Sirius barked at James and Remus which only caused their joy to increase. He turned to regard you,
"Angel, take it back, say you don't mean that."
Now even you were laughing at the situation.
"Don't you think you're taking this a bit too personally?"
James was now punching the sofa cushion as Remus' head fell back, his entire body shaking with laughter, "How else would he take it?" he says, to whom in particular you're not sure.
"Well, it's because they're lovely. Dogs are great." He defends himself, crossing his arms with a huff.
"Well I'm happy you've found your passion for animals, but dogs aren't my favourite. I'm sorry, okay?"
You extend your hand to touch his face, a form of apology, but he only pulls away,
"I can't believe you'd say that to my face, angel." He put his hands in in defense, "And fuck you two, too." He says to James and Remus. Remus was wiping his tears and James was adjusting his glasses, finally breaking their spell of laughter.
Sirius had refused your affections(which he regretted deeply now), because he now saw James take the opportunity and settle himself on your lap. He was still grinning like a maniac, much to Sirius' annoyance, when he suddenly asked,
"What do you think about deers, or stags?" You stopped running your hands through his hair as pure confusion filled your brain,
"What kind of question IS THAT?" Now it was Sirius' turn to laugh, as he clapped his hands in delight,
"I'm just asking! I can't have your opinion?" He says, forcing your hands to comb through his hair again, but your mind couldn't figure out how the conversation goes from dogs to deers.
"I don't know James, I don't think about deers that often."
"You wound me, princess." says James dramatically, as he imitates being stabbed in his heart.
"What about rats?" You heard from the door, seeing Peter come in. He must have heard a little bit of their conversation.
His question only confused you further, if that was even possible.
"You went from dogs, to deers, and now rats." You raise your hands in defeat,
"I can't do this anymore"
Remus throws his head back laughing, his eyes crinkled, and you think that might be the only good thing to come out of the whole debacle.
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heaven4lostgirls · 5 months ago
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hello luv! Could you possibly do a poly! marauders with reader who has issues sleeping like some times she can’t sleep for three nights straight and the next day she’ll fall asleep in the middle of class and can’t keep her eyes open? xxx
pairing: poly!marauders x fem!reader
summary: request above!
warnings: mentions of not sleeping well, insomnia? not sure. mentions of regulus also not sleeping well.
word count: 2.1K
a/n: really enjoyed writing this, hope you enjoy it! thanks for the request
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The emptiness on your side of James’ bed is what wakes him up. He blinks blearily as he stretches to reach over to your side of the bed. He’s greeted by an untouched duvet and perfectly stacked pillows.
As if you had never come to bed at all.
Worry gnaws at his heart as he turns over to look at Remus and Sirius’ beds to check if maybe you snuck off to them instead.
Instead, all he sees is Pete’s snoring figure underneath his covers and Remus and Sirius cuddled up together on the latter’s bed as the former’s bed looks unfortunately similar to the right side of his bed.
He rubs the sleep out of his eyes and thinks better than waking up Remus and Sirius to find you. He grasps his glasses off of his nightstand and tiptoes to his trunk to grab the map.
With a quick glance he’s surprised to find you in the Gryffindor common room, not far at all.
He stuffs the map  back into his trunk as he grabs a jumper that he tugs on as he walks sleepily out of the dorm and down the stairs.
He’s greeted by the sight of you curled up on the long sleeper couch in front of the fire as you have one of Remus’ novels in your hands.
He can see the tiredness wearing you down and the frustration that you can’t seem to give into it.
His feet shuffle against the marble floor which alerts you to his presence, you take a quick glance and frown worriedly as you catch a sleep befuddled James shuffling towards you.
He collapses on top of you with an uncoordinated movement and you let out a small whoosh of air.
“You didn’t come to bed” he murmurs into your neck before he sighs out blissfully as your hands cascade into his curls.
“I couldn’t sleep, didn’t want to worry you” you murmur back, and he frowns softly before pulling away to look into your eyes.
“I would have helped” he frowns and you smile before pulling your hand out of his hair and smoothing out the frown lines on his face.
“S’okay, I’m used to it” you shrug offhandedly and James lips tug down again.
“I’m sorry love” James says and his big brown eyes blink lovingly and morosely at you.
You only shake your head and push him to lay back down on your shoulder.
“Not your fault Jamie, s’just how it is” you say and go back to running your hands through his hair..
He lets out small puffs  of breath against your collarbone as you feel his form start to melt into you.
You’re unjustifiably jealous as you realise he’s fallen back to sleep, his breathing evening out to notify you enough that he’s no longer conscious
You feel your frustration rising and your form tensing enough that it has James whining in his sleep and snuggling into you harder.
You relax, helpless against your boyfriend as you try to keep your tears at bay.
You just wanted to sleep. It wasn’t fair that you had to work twenty times harder than the average person just to do something your body should do naturally.
It had been days since you had last gotten a proper nights sleep, you’d been relying on naps that lasted anywhere from 20 minutes to 2 hours at most.
It was enough to have you functioning but too little that people had started noticing, Sirius had tried to spray some of his lavender oil onto your pillow which had only assaulted your nostrils.
Remus had offered to give you a massage to help ease the tension in your muscles and relax you but that had only worked until he had stopped.
James had volunteered to do some quidditch practice together but that had only resulted in sore muscles in which Remus had to massage.
In conclusion, you were fucked.
Truly, you had tried everything, and you knew the only way to really go through this process was to wait it out.
Your boyfriends were less than willing to let you wait it out, they hated the idea of knowing you were struggling without being able to help.
You turn your gaze to the fire as you watch the flames crackle in the darkness of the semi-lit common room.
Time continues to pass and soon the sun is taking the place of the moon in the window behind you. As the sun rises, you shuffle carefully out from under James as you leave him with a pillow to cuddle.
You make your way to your dorm and a quick casting of tempus tells you that it’s 5 minutes past 6AM.
Early enough for none of your roommates to be awake but late enough for it to be acceptable for you to be getting ready.
You understand this is your reality, something you have to deal with. Some things come easier for you than it does for others and vice versa. It’s just unfortunate yours had to be a healthy sleep schedule.
As you go through your morning routine you cycle through explanations you can give to people about why you weren’t in bed and why you were up so early.
Fortunately, there was an astronomy assignment you could use as a scapegoat for your sleepless endeavours.
Less fortunately, the only people who wouldn’t believe your lies were the only people  you really wished would.
Remus, Sirius and James were all too aware of the fact that you struggled with sleeping, and you harboured some resentment towards yourself for stressing them out over such a trivial matter.
At least that was how you saw it.
By the time you had finished your morning routine, taken a shower and dressed into your uniform, it was 7AM. Breakfast would only start at half past, so you had time to wonder around the castle a bit and get some studying done.
Considering your lack of sleep, you were already quite ahead in assignments, nearly as ahead as Remus and Lily.
Those two really were the swots they swore they weren’t.
You make your way out of your dorm quietly as you grab your bag, as you pass through the common room you take a second to take in James’ sleeping form as you press a sweet kiss on his forehead.
He smiles in his sleep  which brings a soft one to your face as you walk out of the portrait hole.
The castle is lovely early in the morning, quiet and undisturbed by the bustling crowds of Hogwarts students that will soon plague the halls.
Now you can admire how the sun warms the walls of the outer barriers and how some of the portrait’s chatter to themselves in a quiet symphony.
The library is open, so you make your way there, slipping into a familiar alcove as you open the book you had been reading the night before.
The unfortunate side effects of reading whilst running on no sleep catches up to you as you feel your eyelids start to flutter.
You wish this would’ve happened last night, or really any of the other nights you had tried to get some rest.
Since  you can’t afford to miss your classes for the day, you shake yourself awake and make your way to breakfast as soon as possible.
As you reach the doors of the great hall, you’re met with the scrutinizing gazes of your boyfriends as they sleepily look over all the students who have also decided to have an early breakfast.
You’re shocked, truly.
It’s one thing for Remus to be out of bed and at breakfast early, he’s only grouchy until he has a cup of coffee, James basically lives for early mornings but what really takes the cake is whoever let Sirius get up before 8AM.
He looks like he’s taken a shower and done his usual morning routine,  but you can see him complaining as he stabs his eggs, his sleep really is important to him.
As you make your way to the Gryffindor table, you catch the sight of Regulus and Barty at the Slytherin table.
You know he also has trouble sleeping, many nights of meeting and bonding in the astronomy tower had told you that much. Before you two had gotten into relationships, those nights had been your crutch.
You both share a small smile before you pass them, James nudges Sirius harshly in the side at the sight of you,  which in turn causes a chain reaction of Sirius yelping and pushing Remus which causes him to spill his coffee and let out a string of curses.
The chaos stops when you reach the bench in front of them and take a seat, there’s only silence. Which surprises you, silence has never been synonymous with the marauders.
“You lot are awake early” you remark softly as you smile and take your seat. They  all exchange a glass before Remus clears his throat and looks at you.
“Where were you?” he asks, not confrontationally, just curious
Your shoulders migrate to your ears as you offer them all a soft shrug, “I was in my dorm, why?” you ask
You see Remus hesitate before James jumps in, “I woke up alone in the common room” he says sadly and you frown in sympathy.
“I’m sorry Jamie, I just couldn’t-” you start
“Sleep, we know” the three of them chorus together and your cheeks warm.
“Sorry” you mumble as you push your breakfast around on your plate.
“Nothing to be sorry for angel, we just wish you’d come to us” Sirius offers placatingly, and you nod numbly
“It’s just, hard y’know?” you say
“We know, but we want to take care of you” he replies, and you can only nod as you munch on your breakfast.
You can feel the tiredness catching up to you so instead of your usual glass of water or juice in the morning, you grab a cup of coffee to chug down before your first class.
The boys watch you with a nervous energy, three days of not sleeping is not good for anyone. You’re bound to crash out at some point.
You walk sluggishly alongside the boys to your DADA class and as you take a seat next to Remus, Sirius and James take their seats in front of the two of you.
You try and listen as the class continues, but the words start to blur as you glance at your textbook and black spots dart around your vision.
You allow yourself a few seconds to lay your head on the desk to rest, the soft scraping of Remus’ quill against the parchment and Sirius and James’ soft whispering lulls you to sleep.
Your breathing evens out as you fall asleep, cheek pressed against your textbook and hair framing your face.
Remus pauses in his note taking as he takes a quick glance to you. He huffs a small laugh as he catches your sleeping figure.
He turns backwards to catch the eyes of his boyfriends as he tilts his head to your sleeping form in amusement.
Although Sirius shares some of his amusement, James’ worry betrays itself in his eyes.
Sirius offers him a comforting smile before learning towards his boyfriend and whispering the word ‘cloak’ which has James’ smile shifting from worry to excitement.
Always one to skip class, James makes quick work of throwing the cloak over himself as Remus and Sirius try to act inconspicuous.
Remus shakes you awake softly as Sirius quickly levitates all of your belongings back into your bag which he slings over his shoulder.
You blink drowsily and look at Remus, who helps shift you towards James outstretched arms in the back corner on the class.
All you can do is sleepily walk into his arms as he wraps the cloak around the both of you as he carries you out of the class.
He waits outside to see Remus walk out the classroom confidently before a crash and a curse is heard before Sirius runs out of the class.
Remus looks at him with a baffled expression. “The fuck did you do?!” Remus asks incredulously.
Sirius gives him a glare, “hex Carrow, what’d you do?!”
“…Ask to go to the bathroom” Remus replies, and Sirius’ mouth drops open.
James huffs a laugh which has you jostling in his hold, he mutters a small apology as he adjusts you comfortably in his arms with your legs wrapped around his waist and his arms around his neck.
“Dorm?” Sirius offers with a fond look to your face peaking out and Remus nods as they make the walk back to the dorm.
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suugarbabe · 9 months ago
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drunken daydreams | s.b. x reader
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word count: 2.5k
warnings: mentions of drinking, pining, fluff
a/n: little fun fact i found out, beer pong was invented in the 1950's?? also this is for week three of jinxed july <3
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Hopeless. That is what it felt like to crush on Sirius Black. Hopeless because Sirius was, well…everything. He was charming beyond belief, even professors falling for his half turned smile and cheeky winks. He was absolutely gorgeous, unfairly so really, onyx hair that fell in messy tendrils no matter how many times he ran his ring glad fingers through it. His eyes were always playfully full of mischief, but if you truly paid attention to him (and you did) you could tell that they shifted just the slightest bit in shade depending on his mood. His mouth seemed to permanently be painted with a smirk unless someone was telling him ‘no’, then his powder pink lips would puff in a pout and who in their right mind could deny that look? (certainly not you). 
When Lily asked you to spend a week at James’s family cabin with her over summer holiday you had originally said no. James’s cabin meant Sirius’s cabin since the latter now lived with the former; that and they were attached at the hip with no hope of prying them apart. Lily had pouted, begging you to say yes, but going only seemed like torture. Torture because it’d be a week essentially alone with Sirius as Lily and James would likely frequently find couple things to do, Marlene and Dorcus would be hiking everyday and Remus would seclude himself with ‘peace and quite for once’. Alone time with Sirius made you nervous because you were nearly, practically, almost one hundred percent sure that your feelings toward Sirius were not reciprocated. 
But that did not stop Lily from employing the raven haired boy to get you to change your mind. Which is how you found yourself conveniently alone with Sirius in the train compartment on the ride back from Hogwarts. “Pretty please, you can’t not go, everyone’s going,” in classic fashion with his little pout and his eyes widened. You tried to avert your gaze from his, knowing if you looked too long you’d give in. But this tactic failed miserably as Sirius simply moved back into your view, “I’m literally begging here, love,” and oh how he looked so pretty begging. “Please say yes, I cannot hear James or Lils complain the whole week. I need you there.”
He needed you there. That’s what he had said. And that one phrase spun a slew of delusional scenarios in your mind that led you to agree to join the rest of the group for the week. 
It wasn’t as bad as you originally anticipated in the beginning. The lot of you gathered at the Potter’s manor, utilizing the floo system for the trip to the cabin, that experience going surprisingly swimmingly for it being your first time. The first night at the cabin you guys decided on a bonfire. “It’s like christening the place,” James had said, with much encouragement from Sirius and much to the eye roll of Remus. “We’ll go get drinks started!” Lily grabbed your arm, pulling you up from your chair and back towards the door of the cabin, “any requests or all we good with surprises?” 
James Dorcus and Remus laid out drink orders while Marlene said you could surprise her. You turned to Sirius as he spoke next, “You know my drink, don’t you love?” You bit the inside of your cheek, hoping the heat you felt wasn’t making itself prominent as a blush on your cheeks, “Firewhiskey with cola, right?” Sirius winked, nodding in confirmation and the swarm of butterflies in your stomach started humming. 
Back in the kitchen Lily was practically vibrating with excitement. You let out a long sigh, “Something got you worked up Lils? Wanna share with the class?” Lily wore a small grin as she filled all the glasses with ice, “I’m just thinking about what I saw and if you saw it too.” You halted in filling Sirius's glass, resting both hands on the counter in front of you, “What do you think you saw? Because James’s googly eyes over you is basically a daily occurrence, I didn’t think it’d have you this excited still.” Lily rolled her eyes at your statement, “I’m very clearly talking about Sirius and you.” 
You made a scrunched face at this, “There’s nothing between me and Sirius. Well, like we’re friends, obviously, but you know there’s nothing more.” Lily shrugged, a slight curl to her lips as she continued making drinks. “Lils, please. He doesn’t like me like that. It would never happen and honestly…” you grabbed a few glasses in your hands, “I’m coming to terms with that.” You were not coming to terms with it. But it would be far easier than having all your friends thinking you’re hopelessly pining after him. What doesn’t help is Lily’s next response, “I dunno, babes. I could see the two of you together.” She slid the back door open with her elbow before walking back onto the deck, calling out that drinks were ready.
That one comment had you reeling, overanalyzing every interaction and conversation you had ever had with Sirius. You barely even registered that he spoke to you when you handed him his drink before taking your seat in the lawn chair next to his. You glanced his way when you felt his stare after a moment, “Sorry, Siri, did you say something?” Sirius smiled sweetly at you, a hint of something you couldn’t read in his eyes, “Just a thanks for the drink, love.” The commonplace pet name had your cheeks aflame but you prayed to Merlin the light of the bonfire hid the evidence. 
As the night went on and the drinks flowed, everyone was eventually corralled inside for what James called a “mandatory game of beer pong” after Lily agreed to play (and be his partner) with the promise that everyone would play ‘the muggle way’, no use of magic for assistance. Everyone agreed and placed their wands on the counter and paired up, you finding yourself partnered with Sirius. Remus stated he would be the officiant to “help keep Sirius and James in line and following the rules” much to their promises to play cleanly. “Ready, partner?” Sirius called you up to the table, dropping the ping pong ball in one of the cups closest to him. You nodded, a tight lip smile on your lips to try and help hide the nerves that were brewing inside. 
You looked across the table at Lily and James, the red head trying to conceal her smirk as she looked from you to Sirius and back. You rolled your eyes with a slight smile before Sirius started smack talking James. “Oh you’re in for it now, Potter. You and your little Lilly flower are cute and all, but you’re no match for me and y/n/n here, isn’t that right, love?” Sirius held his hand out palm up, clearly waiting for you to slap it. You gave him a high five and a small nervous laugh, “Y-yeah, right.” 
To your surprise Sirius was actually correct; James and Lily were horrible at beer pong, but you and Sirius looked like seasoned champions. The game against them went rather quickly, James sulking against Lilly on the couch as Marlene and Dorcus re-racked the red cups. This game proved to be a little more difficult, the girls being able to really go toe to toe with you and Sirius, you were down to two cups left to sink, while Marlene and Dorcus only had three cups. Marlene stood tall at the end of the table, ping pong ball in hand. She closed one eye, Dorcus semi-slurring encouragements to her before Marlene gave the ball a light toss. 
You watched as the ball arched in the air coming down towards one of the last three cups. The ball began the swirl around the rim of the cup and your next actions were more on instinct than real knowledge or skill of the game. You bent down near the cup, giving a quick blow of air near the ball before watching the physics of the combination making the ball jump from the cup and land back onto the table. Sirius let out a gleeful noise of shock, whereas Marlene and Dorcas began protesting, “Hey! We said no magic! Remus, that’s a foul we get that cup right?!” Sirius, however, was quick to go to your defense, “Nuh-uh, there was no magic involved, that’s just how good y/n/n’s blowing abilities are!” 
Your eyes widened in shock at his words, Dorcas rattling off a teasing remark before Sirius could correct himself, “Oh? And how would you know about her blowing abilities, Black?” The drinks were getting to you slightly, a small giggle bubbling from your throat as Sirius tried his best to defend himself, “I, well…erm, that’s not what I meant…I-I mean,” he turned to face you, his eyes half lidded as they made contact with yours, “Don’t you look at me like that, love.” A lazy smile adorned your face, “I’m not looking at you any kind of way, Siri.” 
Sirius shook his head in disagreement, “You’re giving me those eyes.” You batted your eyelashes a few times, “I’m not giving you any special eyes. Besides, if you’re wanting to know about my abilities, you can just tell me.” Sirius’s eyes widened before he let out a huff of air through his nose, “No, I don’t, I want to- I mean, you did the, the thing- and then Dorcus said what she said and so I just - I, erm, n-no I’m good.” While you laughed a little at his stumbling, you couldn’t deny the pit growing in your stomach the longer he tried to find nice ways to essentially reject your playful advance. 
Luckily you didn’t have to hide your dejection for long as you and Sirius lost to the girls and now your solemn look could be explained by the loss of the game instead of the loss of any chance you had with Sirius. You gave him a half-hearted smile before going to find a seat on one of the couches as James and Lily went to play against the winners. You only half paid attention the game, every interaction with Sirius from the night playing back over and over in your mind. Why did he have to be so bloody hard to read? 
To even get you on this trip in the first place he said he needed you there. But you don’t speak two words to each other in any capacity until everyone arrived at James’s manor. Even there it was only long glances, which could have been strictly initiated by you. Although you could have sworn he was already looking your way one or two times when you made eye contact. Here at the cabin you knew his drink, because of course you did. Was he teasing you earlier when he asked?
But he also winked at you. And he’s been calling you love, and made that comment about your ‘blowing skills’. But he does make dirty jokes a lot. You really would be a perfect couple though, all of your friends told you so whenever you talked about him, sometimes even when you didn’t talk about him. People wouldn’t say that to you just to be mean to you, I mean, these were your best friends. But he also essentially rejected your flirtatious advances. Why was this so hard to- 
A ring clad hand was waving in front of your face causing you to blink several times before refocusing on the object of your delusional thoughts. Sirius had his ever present charming grin, a special glint in his hooded eyes, “Caught you daydreaming about me again, didn’t I, love?” Maybe it was the liquid courage, but the words came tumbling out of your mouth before you could stop them, “Don’t be mean, Sirius.” 
Sirius quirked an eyebrow, “What do you-” Rather ungracefully, you cut him off, “Just because you know I have a crush on you doesn’t mean you can tease me like everyone else does. It’s honestly humiliating enough.” Sirius’s once smirking features changed to that of confusion, “It’s humiliating to have a crush on me?” You groaned in frustration, covering your face with your hands before looking down at your feet, “Yes, Sirius, it’s humiliating to have a raging crush on someone that clearly has no interest or feelings toward me beyond platonic friendship.” 
The cool metal of his rings felt like ice against your flamed skin as he forced you to look at him, “Who said my feelings were strictly platonic?” You opened your mouth to respond before quickly closing it again. You sat up straighter then, Sirius’s hand dropping from your chin, “Well, you did, you said that. Back during the game, when Dorcus was teasing us and I asked if that’s what you wanted. You basically stumbled over a way to tell me you were uninterested in my advances.” 
His melodic laugh filled your ears. You were ready to smack him for being so rude before he started giving you a viable response. “Sweetheart…I wasn’t trying to reject you,” you looked up to meet his eyes once more as he continued, “I responded that way because you had me flustered, you…kind of always make me feel that way.” He scratched the back of his head nervously, “I didn’t really know how to respond properly when Dorcus made that remark. And, erm, I didn’t want to make you feel uncomfortable by admitting I probably, erm, wouldn’t mind finding out how good your,” he gulped slightly, “abilities are.” 
Your gaze fell to his lips before meeting his eyes once more; Sirius bit his lip, trying to hold back what you were sure was a shit-eating smirk. His hand cupped your cheek gently, “Can I?” You gave a small nod as you leaned in, Sirius closing the remaining distance before capturing your lips with his. This was not a fiery, passionate, kiss. But soft, gentle and sweet. His lips slotted against yours as though they were always meant to be there. 
His fingers entangled slightly in your hair, pulling you closer to him. You braced yourself with a hand on his thigh. A small whimper drifted from Sirius’s throat at the extra physical contact, wanting to fuel you further. What felt like two small, solid objects pelted both you and Sirius, causing you both to pull away from each other in confusion. “Don’t partners usually only make out when they win a game, not when they lose?” Marlene teased lightly. You looked over at Lilly who gave you a wink. One thing was for sure, you were not going to doubt her again.
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moonsprcngs · 10 months ago
Note
I love love love your writting. can you do an enemies to lovers Sirius Black one shot? idk like make it hella dramatic, like fighting in the rain n then they kiss, or like a truth or dare n they have to kiss or sum. again love u sm have a good day stay healthy
hi my lovely, thank you so so much for the compliment & the request! i'm so flattered that u love my writing. i love YOU and i hope this did ur idea justice! <3 i also decided to make the reader a hufflepuff in this cause i thought it'd be a cute lil asset, hope u don't mind!
sirius black x fem!hufflepuff!reader <3
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One thing about you is that you could not stand Sirius Black.
Everybody seemed to love him. Not just the students, but teachers too; even Professor McGonagall couldn't hide her smirk behind her hand when she often gave him a good scolding.
Really, the only one of the four marauders you could stand was Remus Lupin. Peter Pettigrew was okay, though he was far too much of a tag-a-long for your liking, and James Potter was practically Sirius' right hand man. Remus was your Potions partner and he was, admittedly, as much of a sweetheart as a marauder could get, often helping you study and walking you back to your common room when he caught you asleep in the library during his prefect rounds (which only happened once... or maybe twice).
"They're not so bad," he promised you one Potions class, watching for your reaction with a sheepish grin as Sirius and James messed with Snape's potion at the back of the room. "They're actually really nice once you, y'know, get to know them."
"Nice?" you questioned him, scoffing out a laugh and grimacing at the sound of Sirius' laughter bellowing through the classroom. "Need I remind you what Sirius did to me in third year?"
"I know, I know! But he's changed, Y/N, honestly! He's more... mature?"
Even Remus couldn't quite believe the words that had just left his mouth as you both watched the boy in question actually spit into Severus' cauldron. "Oh yeah, Rem, so mature."
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One thing about Sirius Black is that he could not stand you.
He'd always believed what he did to you in your third year was harmless, something that would be forgotten within a month or two and not to be dwelled on. He knew you harboured a secret little crush on him at the time, so he figured... why not?
He really did mean it when he asked you out, though. Sure, he didn't know you too well; you were really just another Hufflepuff that he shared some classes with. But Remus seemed to like you, so he figured it could at least be a good way to make a new friend if nothing else.
"Hey."
You looked up from your book on Herbology at the rude interruption, and of all the people you were expecting to be standing before you, you were surprised at the sight of Sirius Black. You cleared your throat awkwardly, willing the immediate blush to disappear from your cheeks. "Hi?"
It came out as more of a question than you intended it to, but he grinned at you nonetheless and your face felt warm, was it warm in there?
You did a quick scan of the library in search of any of his smug little friends, but you saw no one. Just him.
He didn't wait for an invitation before pulling out the chair beside you and sitting down, still grinning ear to ear. "You free Saturday?"
You couldn't help but raise your eyebrows in surprise, your yellow tie suddenly feeling far too restrictive around your neck as you somehow managed to splutter out a "yes". Sirius pulled a bouquet of flowers out from behind his back (pink and white roses) and offered them to you with the same lopsided grin. "Meet me at the Three Broomsticks? Two o'clock?"
The only problem was... James had gotten into his head.
That same afternoon, Sirius entered his dorm with an air of confidence, not dissimilar to usual, but he had a different sort of spring in his step.
Remus and James were sat on their respective beds. The former looked up at him over his book and raised a single eyebrow, clearly noticing something different about his entrance, though James didn't look up from the Quidditch magazine he was reading and paid no mind.
"Afternoon, boys," he announced, his voice dripping with glee as he crashed down onto his bed.
"Afternoon, Pads," Remus responded, a curious tone to his voice as he kept his eyebrow raised. "What's gotten into you today?"
"Scored a date," he said, far too matter-of-factly for the grin he was still sporting. "With Y/N."
Remus' book fell shut on the ground with a thud, jaw dropped open and lost for words as James finally cocked an eyebrow. "Who's that?"
"Y/N L/N. Y'know, the Hufflepuff girl in our Potions class?"
"And Herbology, and Charms," Remus finally composed himself, now staring at Sirius with a pointed look, well aware of his friend's... reputation. "Look, Pads. I know she likes you, but you have to be careful about this. Y/N is my friend, and I don't want to see you hurt her."
James suddenly barked out a laugh, finally dropping his magazine as he engaged in the conversation. "Be careful? There's nothing to be careful about, Moony. As if Sirius is actually going to go on a date with a Hufflepuff. Don't embarrass yourself like that, Padfoot."
"Don't be such a dick, Prongs," Remus spat, tossing a cushion at his mate and hitting him square in the head. "She's my friend."
Sirius said nothing.
So the next Saturday rolled around and you arrived at the Three Broomsticks at five minutes to two. Though, five minutes to two became two o'clock, which became two thirty, which became three, which soon became four.
And Sirius never showed.
The next day at breakfast, you'd found him, slapped him across the face, threw the bouquet of pink and white roses back at him and left without a word.
Sirius Black did not like to be publicly humiliated. He decided there and then that he wanted nothing else to do with you.
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It wasn't until your sixth year rolled around that Remus realised things were changing.
Gryffindor had just won their first match of the season against Slytherin and, as usual, there was a huge party in their common room.
You weren't much of a partier, usually preferring to stay in the comfort of your dorm with a book that you and Remus were bound to discuss within the next few days. Of course, you'd attend the parties when Hufflepuff won, but you were never one to join in with the other houses.
Although he knew this, Remus Lupin had a plan.
He was beginning to grow sick of the constant complaining on both sides of his friends. It was always "Come on, Moony, she's so bloody weird" or "Look at him, Remus, how on earth can you stand to be friends with him?" and, quite frankly, he'd had enough.
He loved the marauders, of course; they were his best friends, his brothers. But he also loved you, and though he knew that Sirius' young and dumb actions in third year hurt you, he really wasn't lying when he said he'd changed.
Yes, Sirius would call you weird or strange or annoying to his friends, but Remus knew he was deflecting. He saw the way something in his eyes changed when he watched you enter Platform 9 3/4 on the first day of your fifth year. He saw the way he'd been secretly pining over you for the last year.
Likewise, he knew the same went for you too. No matter how badly he hurt you, your feelings for Sirius never really left. He saw the way your gaze lingered on his friend for just a little bit too long. He knew the way you shook your head and muttered "what a dick" under your breath every time you looked away was a cover up.
The party in the Gryffindor common room was in full swing by the time Remus convinced you to join him. It had taken a lot of begging and a fair few promises to buy you more books before you agreed, and you found yourself awkwardly at Remus' side as you entered through the portrait hole.
It wasn't long until James had found his friend and immediately tugged him away. Remus tried to fight it but found him impossible, shooting you an apologetic smile before you lost sight of him. You made a mental note to demand another promise of more books when you found him again.
You accepted defeat and made your way over to the drinks table, in need of at least something before you inevitably called it a night early and headed back to the comfort of your own common room.
Smoothing the fabric of your dress down, you suddenly felt very out of place in the yellow and white floral fabric, but an unfortunately familiar voice snapped you out of your thoughts before you got too caught up in them.
"L/N?"
You immediately snapped your head up and fought the urge to roll your eyes at the source of the voice. "Black."
Sirius seemed surprised at your presence, his eyebrows raised and an interesting sort of smirk gracing his features as he looked down at you. "And what exactly are you doing here?"
"Remus invited me," you kept your answers short, trying to slow your rapidly beating heart as you reached for the firewhiskey and flashed him a sarcastic smile. "Is that a crime?"
"No." His smirk only grew, seemingly amused at your snap back as he kept his eyes on you. "Not a crime at all, love."
He knew what he was doing. How dare he try and flirt with you now after what he did before.
"Don't call me that," your response came immediately and you felt yourself trying to fight the shiver that was so desperate to creep down your spine. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have a party to enjoy and somebody to stay far away from."
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That was an hour ago now, and since then you had already downed way too many cups of firewhiskey for your body to handle. You were so set on trying to avoid Sirius that you tried to make yourself forget he was even there at all.
An hour became two and Sirius ended up finding you back at the drinks table again, barely even holding yourself up as you tried to pour yourself a cup of whatever alcohol was nearest to you. Sirius, though definitely not sober, was painfully so compared to you, and he watched in slight amusement as you managed to get more of the liquid on your dress than in the cup.
"You alright over there?" His voice snapped you out of your pitiful concentration and in turn made you jump, even more of the liquid spilling down you when you did.
"Hello, Sirius," you responded, turning to look at him with a big smile and almost stumbling into his chest, causing him to wrap his arms around you as he caught you.
In your clouded state of mind, you couldn't for the life of you remember that you're supposed to hate this guy, and instead only found memories of the longing gazes when you racked your mind. You'd regret this tomorrow; you most certainly could not handle your drink.
"Hello, Y/N," Sirius raised his eyebrows at your state as he answered you, still amused as he copied your tone of voice. "You look like you've had enough."
You gasped as if he had just suggested you were You-Know-Who himself. "I have not!"
Despite your best efforts, your words came out slurred and Sirius knew Remus would not be happy that you're left out here alone in this state. He cast a quick glance around the common room but couldn't find a single glimpse of his mate in the crowd, and he let out a quiet curse under his breath.
I'm supposed to hate her, he thought to himself, letting his eyes fall back on your smiling face. She embarrassed you Sirius, shoved a bouquet of bloody roses at you in front of the entire Great Hall to see. But why did she have to grow up and be so bloody pretty?
"Let's get you back to your common room, yeah?" He suggested, gently taking the cup from you and placing it back down on the table.
He admittedly felt bad for you. Remus was nowhere to be found and he couldn't just let you get all the way back to the Hufflepuff common room by yourself in this state. You're just being a decent guy, Sirius, he told himself again. You'd do this for anyone.
You either didn't seem to hear him or his words didn't register in your brain, because when he placed a hand on the small of your back to carefully lead you through the crowd and back through the portrait hole, you only spoke with a grin.
"Are we going on a walk?"
"Yeah, love. We're going on a walk." Sirius couldn't help but chuckle at your reaction, but deep down he felt a little tense. With the state you were in, anyone could've taken advantage of you, and he was glad he found you before anyone else did. Maybe it was the little bit of firewhiskey still running through his veins, but Merlin, Black, the fuck is wrong with you tonight?
The walk back to the Hufflepuff common room was slow and quiet, and Sirius ended up wrapping an arm around your shoulders and taking most of your weight against him to stop your constant stumbling.
Once you'd reached the portrait, you muttered the password and allowed Sirius to half-carry you through, still not completely aware of what was going on, and the pair of you only stopped when you reached the bottom of the stairs leading to the girls' dormitories.
He'd never been in this part of the castle before, and he couldn't stop the small smile that graced his lips when he noticed it smelt like a lovely mixture of flowers and freshly baked cookies.
You turned to face him once you reached the stairs and something suddenly clicked in your drunken mind.
"Sirius? Is that you?!"
He chuckled quietly again and nodded his head, raising his eyebrows with an amusement smile. "Yeah, it's me. You're back in your common room now, yeah?"
You took a moment to process his words through the thick fog clouding your brain and nodded your head, still smiling too before looking down at your dress. Your smile fell into a sad frown. "Oh no, it's ruined! It was so pretty!"
The boy in front of you took notice at the alcohol stains on your dress and shrugged his shoulders. "It's still pretty. I mean, you look pretty. I mean-"
If you did notice him stumbling over his words and the blush that rose to his warm cheeks, you didn't show it (though Sirius doubted very much that you did notice in your state). You simply smiled again, turning away from Sirius without another word as you all but skipped up the stairs.
It wasn't until he neared the portrait hall to leave again that he heard your quiet little drunken giggle. "Sirius Black thinks I'm pretty."
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That was months ago now and you and Sirius hadn't even uttered a word to each other about that night.
Actually, if it was possible, you started avoiding each other more.
You were finally starting to admit to yourself that you had feelings for Sirius Black, but that scared you. How could you fall for him again after he stood you up in your third year? He left you there for two hours, your single butterbeer looking pathetic in front of you as Madame Rosmerta shot you sympathetic smiles from behind the counter every now and again.
You hadn't been in there since.
Little did you know, Sirius was avoiding you for exactly the same reason.
Okay, perhaps he was a little embarrassed to admit that he liked you. James was a dick that day three years ago and, although Sirius knew the both of them had matured since then, he couldn't help but worry his best friend just wouldn't approve. He knew deep down that James, especially now older, would just want him to be happy, but he was scared.
Remus had been so angry with him when he stood you up that he was also scared to face him again. Would he even believe him or force him to stay away from you for your own wellbeing?
The rain was pelting down heavily in early February as you trudged into Professor Slughorn's Potions class. The castle at this time of year was sickening, with pink and red paper hearts hovering over your heads in the hallways and fluttering around the tables in the Great Hall as Valentine's Day drew closer.
Even your professors had taken on the Valentine's theme, and you couldn't help but groan as you gathered around Slughorn's desk with the other Hufflepuffs and Gryffindors.
"Amortentia," the professor announced, and a group of Gryffindors standing behind you giggled to themselves. "The most powerful love potion in the world. If brewed correctly, the scent will be different to everyone according to what attracts them."
James Potter scoffed on the other side of the crowd and whispered something in Sirius' ear. The latter laughed loudly, pulling the attention of everyone in the room.
"Mr Black?" Slughorn spoke through the boy's laughter, keeping his calm demeanour. "Perhaps, since you find this so amusing, you'd like to demonstrate for us?"
"Don't mind if I do, sir," Sirius just laughed again and made his way through the group, going to stand by the professor with a cocky smirk. "I bet it's just a load of old bollocks anyway."
"Well, I suppose we'll find out, Mr Black. Tell us what you smell, won't you?"
You watched as Sirius leant over the cauldron and you took a moment to take in his appearance. His shirt was untucked and unbuttoned a quarter of the way, his red and gold tie hanging loosely around his neck, and though you willed it not to, your heart couldn't help but flutter slightly.
At that moment, you realised that, if Slughorn was right, Sirius was about to reveal the scent of the one he loved.
"Smells like..." his voice pulled you from your thoughts as he took in the scent of the potion, "vanilla, fresh cookies, and..."
He trailed off, and his eyes suddenly flicked up to meet yours, an unreadable expression on his face as he muttered quietly.
"And, uh, roses."
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Whether it was the intensity of Sirius' gaze or the fact that everybody had turn round to look at you that made you storm out of the Potions classroom, you couldn't be sure.
Not even the heaviness of the rain could stop you as you tried to get as far away from the castle as possible. What the fuck just happened?
"Y/N?"
You shook your head, refusing to turn around as you continued walking. "Leave me alone, Sirius."
"Y/N, please-"
"I don't want to talk to you right now."
"Merlin's beard, L/N, would you stop and listen to me for one bloody second!"
He'd caught up to you now, throwing himself in front of you to stop you on your course. You'd almost crashed into his chest, and Sirius suddenly remembered how you'd done the same thing at that party four months ago.
"Sirius, please-" you begged quietly, trying to push past him.
You didn't get very far as he gently grabbed your elbow and brought you back in front of him. "No, Y/N, we're going to talk. For the first time, we're going to bloody talk."
"About what, Black? What could you possibly want to talk to me about? You haven't wanted to talk to me for the last three years, why start now?!"
He couldn't help it as his voice raised slightly, and you watched him grab at his dripping wet hair in frustration. "I just openly admitted my feelings for you in front of the entire fuckin' class and you won't even talk to me!"
"Because it's bullshit, Sirius!"
Sirius stopped at this, his eyebrows furrowing as he shook his head slightly. "What the bloody hell do you mean?"
"This is just another one of your plans to humiliate me, just like you did three years ago. I'm not falling for it this time."
Successfully this time, you pushed past him, shoulders brushing together as you did. He tried to grab your wrist to pull you back but you shook it out of his grip and continued walking away from him again.
"Y/N-"
"No."
"Y/N, come on-"
"I said no, Sirius."
"Y/N, I fucking love you!"
His words halted you in place. Neither of you spoke for a moment, and the only sounds you could hear was the violent pattering of the rain and his heavy breathing.
You shook your head slowly, not even turning around to face him. "You can't. You can't do this shit to me, Sirius."
"Why not? It's true!"
His words dripped with exasperation. He seemed desperate now, his body moving back in front of you again and Godric, were those just raindrops on your face or had you been crying too?
"Sirius, I can't- I can't let myself be hurt by you again," your voice cracked slightly as you refused to look at him, feeling your throat clog pathetically. "I liked you. I really bloody liked you and when you stood me up I was so humiliated."
Something in his face softened at your words, and his voice grew quieter. "Y/N, I didn't know-"
"I haven't been on a single date since, Sirius. I can't let anyone even attempt to get close to me like that because every time they do I think they're just gonna stand me up anyway, because that's what Sirius Black did. Do you have any idea how much it hurts to fall in love with you when-"
But suddenly all words were forgotten as his lips were on yours.
Sirius' hands were now on your waist, pulling you impossibly closer. He tasted faintly of cigarettes and some chocolate that was no doubt stolen from Remus, and it took a moment to process what was happening. But you kissed him back.
Godric, did you kiss him back.
It was a few moments later when you pulled away, his forehead finding place against yours. Neither of you spoke for a moment and your eyes took their time to flutter open, only to find him already looking at you.
"You love me, you said it yourself. Give me a chance," his voice came as a whisper, his breath fanning against your mouth as his eyes searched your features desperately.
You nodded your head breathlessly, your hands sliding up around his shoulders as you gave him a pathetically pointed look. "You pull that third year shit ever again and you're dead."
"I swear. Merlin, I swear."
You laughed quietly and Sirius broke out into a wide smile. The silence that took over you both was comfortable, the rain providing a settling background noise despite the cold that chilled your bones
"For the record, I would have smelled you too."
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694 notes · View notes
wbellab · 23 days ago
Text
Wild(Lily)flower | James Potter
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summary: You’ve been there for Lily after her break up with James Potter. Somewhere along the way, he started looking at you differently and you let it.
pairing: james potter x reader
cw: angsssst, mention of insecurity, breaking girl code, some fluff
1.7k words
inspo: wildflower by billie eilish
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The party was the biggest one you’d ever attended since your time at Hogwarts. It was Sirius’ idea. To organise a party with all the former seventh year students from two years ago. It was quite a big success if you could say so yourself. The laughter and chatting were muffled by the loud music playing in the background, and a crowd of dancing people was forming right in the middle of the room.
James’s hand is at the small of your back, guiding you through them. From behind you, you hear Sirius calling his name.
"Hey ! You guys are late." He stumbled nearly spilling the content of his half empty glass of firewhsky. Of course Sirius Black was already drunk.
"We wouldn’t have been if it weren’t for a certain someone." You turned your head playfully glaring at your boyfriend who groaned hiding his face with his hand.
"It’s hard when you look this beautiful." Sirius turned his head towards you and you both bursted into laughter. James face flushed brightly as he realised what he just said. "Not like that… I mean it’s hard to control myself- Whatever you guys are twats."
You simply continued laughing.
"Please love, stop this…" He grumbled embarrassed. You gave him a quick kiss on the cheek. You then turned around to take all your surroundings.
"We are actually late because we didn’t think there would be this much people." You said, slightly impressed. "Did you pay them ?" James snorted from next to you, unconsciously squeezing your waist. This made your heart leap from your chest. Even after one year of dating you couldn’t get used to the feeling of his hands against you.
"He truly did pay some people to come here." He commented, making Sirius’ face flush a darker shade
"You guys are haters. All these people are happy to be here. Told you this party would be wicked." Sirius smirked right at you. You rolled your eyes a small smile playing on your lips. "And as much as I love you sweetheart, I’ll have to steal MY bestfriend from you for a while." He winked, walking towards the sofa where Remus was sat smoking and Peter layed there completely blacked out.
James leans towards you. "I’ll bring you something to drink." He then pressed a quick kiss to your temple before following Sirius.
You exhale nervously, smoothing invisible creases from your dress, before raising your head trying to find some familiar faces. And that’s when you see her. Your stomach dropped at the sight.
Lily Evans stands across the room, her beautiful red hair catching the light, a drink held in her hand. And she isn’t looking at James, she is looking right at you.
You’ve spent sleepless nights apprehending to face her again. Somehow your nervous system can’t make the difference between being hit by a centaur and seeing her again. This is worse than you’ve ever imagined.
You tear your gaze away from her, not trying to dwell on what she would be thinking, but it’s too late. The weight in your chest, the one you’ve been carrying since the day James Potter first looked at you like you were something more than just a friend—it presses down, heavy and inescapable.
Because Lily Evans was never just a friend to him.
And because Lily Evans and James Potter were in love before. And Lily was your best friend.
"He is so annoying !" Lily groaned on her pillow as you watched her, an amused smirk on your lips.
"Whatever you say darling. You love it." You smiled when she tossed the pillow right in your face.
She dramatically huffed, still a small smile appearing on her face. "Maybe I do."
And you had smiled because your friend deserved to be loved by someone like James, a boy who could give her what she truly deserves.
"Why don’t you give him a chance Lils ? He’s a nice guy."
"I don’t think I like him that way. But you’re right, maybe I should ?"
There had never been a world where James Potter and Lily Evans weren’t orbiting each other. And the both of them were perfect for each other.
Until they weren’t.
"It’s not working I don’t get it." Lily sobbed that night on your bed. " What is wrong with me ?! He’s just been so perfect to me all this time, just everything I’ve always wanted. And I don’t know why I can’t like him."
"Sometimes things just fall apart. You can’t control your feelings." You whispered, lingering your fingers in her hair.
"I’m awful." She hiccuped.
"No you’re not Lily. It’s alright to feel that way but it’s important to share your feelings with James so you don’t lead him on.
James returned with a glass full of fruit punch. "Figured you’d rather drink this than Firewhisky." He smiled his dimples showing which instantly eased your mind. But you obviously couldn’t fool James Potter. "Something’s wrong ?" A worried frown appeared on his face. He then turned his eyes in the direction you were staring at earlier, noticing a flash of red hair.
"I’m alright don’t worry." You muttered.
"I’m very sorry about that." He sighed. "I love you. I don’t think there would be anything that would change that."
"Yes I know that." You gave him a small smile. "But it’s not that. I just… I crossed a line."
"We both did. But it was a long time ago, I’m sure she’ll understand and she’ll forgive us for that."
You hummed in respond.
You always thought that Lily’s forgiveness was all you ever needed. That after this, you’ll be able to live your life without any guilt. But oh how you were wrong.
The thought of her lingered in the back of your mind.
You were thriving with James, everyone noticed, he was perfect. Yet your mind couldn’t help overthink your situation. You wondered if James felt the same. If deep down, he disapproved of the way you had betrayed Lily and, because of it, had begun to think less of you.
Maybe he saw her through you ? Maybe you were just a reflection of what they had before ? Because truly Lily and you weren’t that different from the other. You have been friends since your First Year, of course you were both more alike in much more aspect than you could think of.
Sometimes in those darkest nights you guiltily wondered if he sometimes compared the both of you. You obviously didn’t ask him and you would never. But these thoughts quickly disappear as fast as they came, you would’ve never wanted to be in competition with her.
You knew that James Potter loved you and this was enough. It should’ve been.
You tried to forget the look your friend gave you when she learnt you were going out with him. She wasn’t mad nor angry. At first she didn’t say anything but her eyes spoke everything for her. Pain. A small frown of confusion on her face.
"How ?" She asked when you met her outside of a quidditch shop in Diagon Alley. James had quickly pecked your lips before going inside, claiming he needed to buy new gloves for training. Horror was etched on your face when you turned and was met with her shocked face. "Why didn’t you tell me ?" Her voice broke, you couldn’t speak.
You felt your knees shake and if it wasn’t for you leaning to the wall they would’ve probably buckled. You hated yourself. You would never forget this moment. Guilt was consuming you, strangling you from the inside, burning you leaving only numb limbs and ashes. You never thought regret could destroy you this much.
And before you could utter a word. Just like that, she was gone. Tears falling freely on your face, the only evidence that confirmed she was there.
You were sat in the balcony staring at the lights of the city down below. You were cold, but you didn’t mind, you liked the numbness it procured. Your fingers tapped on the arm rests on your chair as you hummed a melody. Your eyes were watering, whether from the cold or from the thoughts you were having, you didn’t really know.
"Isn’t she lovely." A voice that you immediately recognised stated from behind you. You turned around to meet the green eyes of Lily. You couldn’t clearly see her face from the darkness outside but you could discern glitters on her eyelids. She looked beautiful. "By Stevie Wonder, right ?"
Your eyes widened when you finally understood what she was referring to. You gave her a small smile nodding. She smiled back then sat in a chair, not far from yours.
"Aren’t you cold ? You used to always hate the cold." She sighed her hot breathe coming out with smoke, while wrapping her arms around herself.
"I needed to breathe a little."
"James was looking for you." She blurted. Oh. You stared across the city, a small frown on your face.
"I-… You know I’m sorry about that. I don’t think there is one day I don’t feel guilty about ruining what we had." Your throat tightened as you confessed, slowly turning your eyes towards her.
She was giving you a small smile and you noticed the tears pooling in her eyes.
"I miss what we had too you know." Hearing her say this was enough for you to completely break down. You let out a low sniffle as you felt the tears falling freely on your face. And dear Lily, pure sweet Lily, who’d been the one getting betrayed was the one comforting you. "You aren’t a better person for feeling guilty you know, just a sadder one." She hummed, her fingers fondling with you hair. "I forgive you. You should also forgive yourself."
"I’m not trying to feel like a better person." You muttered.
"Guilt doesn’t make you morally superior. Feeling bad about something doesn’t undo the action or make up for it. Real growth comes from change, not just remorse." She reached for your hand and squeezed it. "But I forgive you. You should also forgive yourself."
And somehow, this was worse than any other thing. Guilt will never stop slowly consuming your mind, because Lily, who never held grudges against anyone, didn’t deserve this. She didn’t deserve a friend who prioritised their own happiness before their friendship. Someone like you.
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fourmoony · 11 months ago
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𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐛𝐨𝐲 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐛𝐚𝐝 𝐝𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐬
james potter x f!reader, modern college au, 1.3k
cw: smoking, past rejection, implied self-esteem issues
summary: reader isn't as subtle as she thinks about her crush on jamie
James is propped up against the hood of his car when you pull into the space next to his. He's talking to Sirius and Remus, who stand a few paces in front of James, both smoking a cigarette. Technically, they're not supposed to smoke on campus, but you doubt anyone would be stupid enough to mention that to Sirius Black and his infamously smart-mouthed boyfriend.
James turns his gaze to you as your engine cuts out, keys jangling in your hand and he lifts his hand in a wave. You wave back, half focussed on collecting the multitude of things on your passenger seat and stuffing them into your bag. The carrier bag in your footwell snags your attention, heart stammering a little with the reminder of what lies inside. It's cool. In your opinion, a very cool poster. One you know James has been looking for, for months. His favourite band.
But there's a voice in the back of your head, one born of being fourteen and asking a crush out, only to be told you'd gotten the wrong idea. A voice born of years of being lusted after, but not wanted. It's a voice that tells you James might assume you got this poster because you fancy him and find it weird.
And, sure. You might have went to the lengths of scrolling the internet for hours and paying extra for express shipping because you couldn't wait to see his smile when he unveiled it, to watch his eyes crinkle at the corners with excitement. There's something so overwhelmingly pretty and soft about James Potter. You've been living with that heavy admittance in your chest all semester and next week, your final term of sharing classes with James will end and you want him to remember you. You want to be able to say you tried.
But you don't want him to know all of that.
With a glance, you look back to James. He's waiting patiently for you, still talking to Sirius and Remus. The bag crinkles when you pick it up, the anxiety prickling over your skin like a heat rash. His friends offer you kind smiles when you exit the car, bag slung over your shoulder and the framed poster in hand. "Your engine doesn't sound great, love. You checked your oil recently?" Sirius asks, foregoing a proper greeting.
James laughs at the same time Remus rolls his eyes, akin to a love sick fool even when he's pretending not to be. "Ignore him," Remus drawls, flicking his cigarette to the ground, "He's decided he's going to be a mechanic."
In the year you've known Sirius Black, he's decided he's going to be an artist, then the lead singer of a band, then a lawyer, then a pilot, and now, he's going to be a mechanic. You hope, one day, that one might stick. Though, you've seen how much he loves his motorbike and would put money on the mechanic idea sticking around for a while longer than the time he wanted to buy a zoo.
"Oh, right. You can have a look if you like, but Jamie filled the oil last week." You tell Sirius, who scowls at his best friend.
James smiles kindly when you settle beside him against his car, leaning over to bump your shoulder with his bicep. His height difference is nothing, compared to Remus, but you still have to look up to meet his kind eyes. "Hi." He says.
"Hey."
Sirius scoffs, "Hi."
James pointedly ignores him, "What's in the bag?"
Your eyes nervously flick to Sirius and Remus, the former becoming incredibly interested in what's in the bag as well. Remus must sense your hesitation, because he grabs his boyfriend by the wrist and turns to walk away. "See you later, Prongs. Bye, love."
Sirius can be heard causing a scene even when Remus has dragged him half way across the student parking area. You smile after them fondly.
"You gonna make me guess?" James asks, pushing off of his car to stand and face you.
You have to crane your neck even worse to meet his eyes at this angle, but it's worth it. They're so light in the morning sun they look crystallised. He looks amused, lips twitching as he looks down at you. Heat prickles over your skin as he assesses you. "What's in the bag?"
You hand it to him, wordlessly, and nod for him to look inside. He pulls the frame, turning it until he can see the poster inside. His brows furrow, then lift, his lips parting in surprise. Genuine joy passes through his eyes and you wonder how someone can be so readable, so expressive. His beauty astounds you.
James looks at you, mouth opening and closing like he can't find the words.
"It's for you," You offer, rather dumbly, "Obviously."
James laughs a little breathless, the sound sending your heart slamming into your rib cage. "Where on earth?" He asks, bewildered.
"It's a secret. But I know how long you've wanted one, so I had it framed for safe keeping."
"Thank you," James slides the frame back into the bag, sets it to lean against the front of his car. "Seriously, thank you."
You shrug, hoping it's somewhat believable. "No big deal."
James rolls his eyes at your nonchalance. "Can I hug you? Is that too much? I feel like I should hug you."
You laugh, the feeling of anxiety lifting as James reaches forward to wrap his arms around you. He's warm and soft and smells like cologne and freshly washed clothes. His arms squeeze you tight, his nose buried in your hair where he's hunched over.
"Let me take you to dinner or something, as a thank you." James says as he pulls away, unlocking his car to place the frame safely in the passenger footwell.
"Really, James, you don't have to do that. It's just a poster." You wave him off, pushing off of the car and collecting your bag.
James follows as you walk, shoulder to bicep, skin brushing and your heart in your mouth from the contact alone. "I'm taking you to dinner. Not because I have to, but because I want to."
You find yourself fighting a smile, "Well if you want to." Your voice is teasing an it makes James smile.
"I do. It's a date." James tells you, like it's nothing.
You've halted in the doorway he's holding open for you, head tilting to look into his face. To be sure. To make sure he's not kidding, to make sure he doesn't mean a 'friend date'. He smiles, knowingly.
"You're not subtle, you know," He ushers you through the door, eager to make it to your class on time, "That poster is not easy to find, nor is it cheap."
"It's what friends do." You protest, cheeks warm and palms sweaty.
You brace for rejection, for a joke, for the 'I just don't see you that way'. But James rolls his eyes, reaching around you for the door to the classroom, "Friend's don't go on dates."
"We haven't been on a date." You laugh, incredulously, leading James to your usual seats.
It's a nice feeling, a warm feeling, to feel suddenly safe within your conversation. To feel the normal level of comfort you do with James, even when putting yourself out there. James frowns, "We've been on multiple dates. The library, the cafeteria, the coffee shop just off campus. We even went to that Ethics seminar that one time!"
It takes looking at him to realise he's kidding, the corners of his lips twitching up until he can't fight it anymore. It should be unsettling, for him to make a joke of it. But as he sits, his hand brushes over your shoulder, a gentle touch that sets your skin on fire. "I'm kidding, when I take you out for real, there'll be no confusion on whether or not it's a date."
His breath fans over your ear, warm and his voice thick and you think you might pass out, saved only by the entrance of your professor. James settles in, sends you a wink that has you more flustered than it should.
"Noted." You whisper, though you don't imagine James has heard you.
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ourloveisforthelovely · 2 years ago
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House of Black Part 6
Regulus Black AU
Request: Regulus and his wife are raising Sirius’ daughter after he ends up in Azkaban. Now after his escape Sirius comes to them to thank them and get to know his daughter.
Pairings: Regulus Black x Reader. Former Sirius x Reader
Link to Part 5
Rating: M- smut
____
Sirius waited until Abby was out of the room before speaking. Remus had gone back about whatever he was doing and acted as if nothing weird and uncomfortable just happened.
“So, are you going to say anything about any of that?”
Sirius questioned, feeling his temper building. Remus turned around with a raised eyebrow.
“What would you like me to say?”
Sirius scratched his head before sitting down.
“Oh, I don't know…maybe You just had your ass handed to you Sirius or Sirius, I’m awfully sorry that your kid hates you.”
Remus rolled his eyes. It was time for dramatic Sirius to make his entrance.
“Don’t you think that you are being a tad over dramatic?”
Sirius’ mouth dropped.
“Dramatic? I’m being dramatic?! Excuse me!”
Remus decided it was time to cut in.
“Yes, you are being dramatic. If you were expecting Abby to suddenly accept you and act as if nothing happened then you are crazy. Sirius, you need to accept the fact that this is a lot for a 13-year-old girl to take in. Up until a few months ago, she was used to it just being Regulus and Y/n that she had to answer to. Now you are into the mix and it's a lot for a child. Sirius, you owe both Regulus and Y/n a few thousand thank yous.”
Sirius was silent for a moment. He hated admitting that Remus was right but he was. Sirius did owe both Regulus and yourself a lot.
“Damn it, Remus. Why do you always have to be right? I just hate having to face that snarky look on Regulus’ face when I thank him.”
Remus shook his head. Why he was slightly surprised that Sirius was acting like this was beyond him. Sirius always hated telling Regulus thank you or that he was right about something. That was most likely one of those things that would never change.
“Yes, you should. As Abby told you, you are also lucky to still have your brother. This is a chance for the two of you to hash out your differences and be brothers again. I would take it if I were you.”
Sirius sat back down and lost himself in his thoughts. Maybe Remus was right. This was a chance to work out his differences with Regulus. The only question was how would he go about it?”
“The next thing I know you are going to tell me to let go of the fact that I’m jealous of seeing Y/n so happy with Regulus.”
Remus leaned back in his chair.
“Since you brought it up…whatever you think can and would happen between Y/n and yourself…just don’t. Y/n loves Regulus and she won’t leave him. You burned that bridge a long time ago. If you try anything to mess with them I will take you out back and beat you.”
Sirius stared at Remus with wide eyes before nodding. While Sirius would agree to Remus’ demands, that didn’t mean that he wouldn't internally groan every time Regulus touched you in front of him.
“Okay, okay…I’ll be good.”
(meanwhile)
You were barely awake when there was a knock on the door. Regulus groaned before getting up and quickly dressing. You followed his lead and made the bed.
“If it’s Sirius, I swear I will punch him.”
Regulus grumbled as he opened the door. He was relieved to see Abby and Harry on the other side of the door. Abby looked annoyed while Harry was clearly on edge himself. Regulus couldn’t help but feel sorry for them. Both of their lives were now in an uproar that neither asked for.
“Did he run you lot off that quickly? Not that I blame either of you for leaving. Being in the same room with him made me want to fight.”
Abby walked into the bedroom and sat down on the bed with a frown on her face while Harry moved to the window. You couldn’t help but smirk at the visible resemblance between Abby and Regulus when they were annoyed at the same person. Turning your attention to Harry, you couldn’t help but think about how much he reminded you of James standing there.
Like Regulus, you too worried about how much having Sirius back in your lives and the new upcoming war with Voldemort would throw Harry and Abby’s lives into a complete tailspin?
“No…maybe…Remus told me to come find you both since other members of their Order possy are turning up. I did tell Sirius off a bit. He seemed slightly surprised.”
Regulus couldn’t help the smirk.
“You told him off?”
Abby chose to not mention the fact that she told Sirius about the horocrux. She would let Regulus assume that Remus let that ball drop on Sirius.
“Just that he owes you and mum a lot. There were some other things too but that isn’t important right now. What is important is how are we going to get along with the members of the Order that don’t like us…for whatever reason.”
Regulus briefly considered asking Abby “what other stuff” were said but decided to focus more on the lot of people that he was stuck in a house with. The last thing that Regulus really wanted to do was be involved with the order, however, he knew there was little choice. Regulus would much rather just things the four of you, just like they had been for so long.
The four of us.
That was exactly how it had been for some time. After inheriting Harry, “the three of us” became “the four of us” and that had always been enough for Regulus.
“Things will be just fine. It will take some getting used to but we’ll manage.”
You said, in a calming tone before going over to fix Abby’s hair. She looked up at you with a frown.
“That means that we have to be nice and social?”
She questioned, making you giggle. It didn’t matter that she was actually Sirius’ daughter…she acted just like Regulus.
“The two of you really have no chill.”
You replied. Regulus and Abby exchanged a frown that said “we hate people.”
“No, I just don’t like anyone down there. I didn’t like them as a kid and that really hasn’t changed now. I also haven’t forgotten that they all essentially ignored our presence until Harry and Abby became friends with Ron. Over the years, they could have at least checked in or remotely acted nice. I also haven’t really forgotten that they were supposed to be your friends. Friends don’t do each other the way that they dropped you like a bad habit.”
Regulus grumbled. He would forever have a slight dislike for every member of the order for how they treated you. It didn’t matter if Regulus was a death eater or not, they were your friends and should have been there for you.
How you were so kind and full of grace amazed Regulus. Your grace and dignity. That was two of the many things that Regulus loved about you. Even if someone did you down right dirty, most of the time you still acted with kindness. That didn’t mean that you wouldn’t put someone in their place if they needed to be, however.
“Dad is right. Mum.”
Abby replied, casually.
You turned your attention back to Regulus giving him a wary look. Abby calling the two of you “Mum” and “Dad” again had to be her way of asserting that the two of you being her parents would not change simply because Sirius was now in the mix.
“Right or not, we can’t just go down there and act like complete assholes.”
“Oh, I can.”
Regulus grumbled. You turned your attention to Harry, choosing to ignore Regulus’ comment.
“How are you feeling, dear?”
Harry shrugged.
“A bit uncomfortable, I guess.”
Regulus only had to agree with Harry on that one. This whole experience was about to be uncomfortable as hell.
“We might as well get this over with.”
Regulus murmured.
As expected, the dinner was an awkward meeting from hell. You found yourself sitting silently while members of the original Order carried on as if Regulus and yourself weren’t even there. You nearly made a comment a few times but decided not to. It didn’t seem to be worth it. Only Remus and Sirius made efforts to speak to the two of you. Regulus ignored both sitting in icy silence.
Both Molly and Arthur seemed almost afraid to speak to the two of you. Not that you really blamed them. From where they were sitting both Regulus and yourself had to seem pretty intimidating. Neither of you looked especially friendly. The two of you had to look like the stereotypical members of the House of Black at the moment…cold, icy, and haughty.
You were still a bit bitter about Molly abandoning your friendship when you married Regulus. Speaking to Molly about anything other than the children was almost too painful. You were not about to admit to Molly nor anyone else in the Order that they had hurt you. Old wounds were best left unspoken of and left in the dark. It seemed best, to you, to appear as if their abandonment really caused you no emotional harm at all. If there were one thing that you learned from having Walburga Black as a mother-in-law it would be to be able to hide your true emotions like a champ.
For Regulus, the dinner was just as awkward for him as it was for you…even if he didn’t let on. He, like you, was also thankful that his family taught him the art of being stoic and appearing “unfeeling.” It didn’t matter how many times Sirius nor anyone else, for that matter, tried to speak to him or appeared to try to get a rise out of him Regulus didn’t crack.
He wasn’t sure why anyone in The Order wanted anything to do with him anyway? To them, he was a death eater. He was dangerous. It didn’t matter the good that he did. It wouldn’t matter that he nearly died trying to stop Lord Snakeface. So what if Regulus wrecked his body trying to stop Voldemort? None of it would make any difference to anyone in this room (except you). In The Order’s eyes, Regulus would always be “tainted.”
“And in a way, I suppose that I am just fine with that.”
Regulus thought coldly. He would much rather someone hate him for some hair-brained stupid idea than blow smoke up his ass and pretend to care for him.
The next morning, Regulus sat at the kitchen table reading The Daily Prophet when Sirius came into the room. He didn’t look up from the newspaper as his older brother sat down. Regulus quietly tried to focus on the words in front of him instead of thinking about the last time that he and Sirius were in this room together.
The morning before he left…before everything changed…
Sirius, meanwhile, sat quietly for a moment. He wanted to say something to Regulus. The silence was making him nutty!
“So, don’t speak to me all at once.”
Sirius finally commented. Regulus didn’t look up from the newspaper.
“What would you like me to say?”
He questioned, keeping his voice cold and emotionless. Sirius ran a hand through his hair.
“I don’t know, Reggie. Just say something, anything. This silence…I don’t like it. You can tell me that you hate me if you want.”
Regulus still didn’t look up. The annoyance of Sirius calling him “Reggie” was starting to simmer.
“My name is Regulus. Don’t ever call me Reggie again, if you want to live.”
Regulus’ casual threat didn’t bother Sirius much. As kids, Regulus threatened to kill Sirius at least once a day. Being an adult and doing it seemed to be no different.
“Y/n calls you Reggie.”
Sirius commented.
“Y/n is my wife. She can call me anything that she likes. You…well we both know what you are to me.”
Sirius groaned.
“Right, I’m the blood traitor. I’m the one who shamed the most ancient and noble house of Black…blah blah blah I’m a no-good bastard that ran off and left everything to you.”
“Now I don’t have to say it.”
Regulus replied. He half expected Sirius to start yelling at that. When he didn’t Regulus took a breath.
“I wasn’t going to say any of that because none of its true. You made your choice because that was what was best for you. It didn’t matter if that meant leaving me in this house and making me feel as if I truly meant nothing at all to you. My suggestion is just to let all of that shit go because I don’t want to say anything more about it.”
Sirius sighed. There it was. That was the truth that he needed to hear. He did hurt Regulus and Regulus hadn’t forgotten it.
“It wasn’t to hurt you. I would have taken you with me but I knew that you wouldn’t go. That’s why you were the good son.”
Regulus finally looked up from his newspaper.
“Sirius, I said that I do not want to talk about what happened. It's over and time we both moved on. Neither Y/n nor Abby needs the aggravation.”
Sirius remained quiet for a moment.
“Abby said that I owe both Y/n and yourself a few thousand thank yous for everything and she’s right. I appreciate you taking her in and looking after her…”
Regulus only nodded.
“I would hope that you would have done the same for me, had shoes been on the other foot.”
“You know that I would. Regulus, I get that we aren’t best buddies anymore but you are still my brother. I also know that I did Y/n wrong with the whole getting another girl pregnant but…she seems genuinely happy with you. I think that we both know that I would never have made any kind of a decent husband. She deserves to be happy.”
Regulus again looked up. Sirius was definitely right about that one. You deserved to be happy more than anyone else in the world.
“Yes, she does deserve to be happy and I’m happy that I am able to be the one to make her happy.”
Sirius leaned back in his chair and looked around the kitchen.
“Tell me that mum and dad were halfway decent to her.”
Regulus finally gave up on reading his newspaper and sat it down. There was no way that he was going to escape Sirius.
“Believe it or not, I think that Mum and Dad liked her better than she did either of us. I think that they felt awfully shitty about her family disowning her for loving me. They saw it as an act of revenge for stealing a Potter child since the Potters got you. Dad adored her. He said that she was the one bright spot in our family and I couldn’t agree more. Marrying her was the one thing that I did to make that man proud.”
Before Sirius could respond, Abby walked into the room. She gave Sirius a wary look before going over to Regulus.
“Where is mum?”
Regulus turned to Abby, raising an eyebrow at her seemingly nervous demeanor.
“She went shopping to get some things to brighten this haunted house up a bit. She should be home soon. What’s wrong?”
Abby chewed on her bottom lip. She looked between Regulus and Sirius before speaking again.
“Can you call her and have her come home?”
“Abby, what is it?”
Regulus asked, keeping his voice calm and even. Abby muttered a few words quietly and all crammed together. Regulus blinked a few times.
“I’m sorry, what?”
Sirius decided to try his hand.
“I know that I am getting old but I did not hear a word of that.”
Abby finally groaned.
“I got my period, okay?!”
She turned and stormed from the room without another word. Sirius’ mouth dropped while Regulus acted as if nothing happened.
“So do we take her to the hospital?”
Sirius finally asked as he stood up to pace around the room. Regulus rolled his eyes and shoved his newspaper away. This morning just kept getting better! All Regulus wanted to do was read the newspaper in peace. That definitely wasn’t happening now.
“Tell me that you don’t know a thing about women without telling me that you don’t know a thing about women. I’ll handle this while you be the designated basket case of stupid.”
Sirius only nodded.
“Regulus, I owe you one.”
Regulus stood up and moved to walk out of the room.
“You owe me a few thousand things.”
_____
@amelie-black @jessyballet @knreidy1 @georgeweasleydumbhoe @justfinishthis @fific7 @mimisparkle12 @teletubiswszpilkach @criminalyetminimal @siriuslyceleste @goldendustwoman @littleshadow17 @livshifts @jsjcue @ell0ra-br3kk3r @bxcndd @stelleduarte @millies0bsimp @coffeeaddictednymph @readtomeregulus @saramaple @missgorldafirst @i-love-scott-mccall @s-we-e-t-t-ea @taylor-will-be-the-death-of-me @buttercup-beeee @f4iryluvy @panpride @bennyberry @gugggu6gvai @yousmellllikecaca @quinis @mentally-unstable-hoe @daddyslittlevillain @goldensunshineshit @haroldpotterson @aurorasnape12 @ad-astra-again @dumybitch @marichromatic @melaninnbarbie @ravenhood2792 @play-morezeppelin @spideyxalmighty @lucasfilms77 @rubyroscoe1 @brokencasbutt67-writer @authoressskr @moldy-old-boot @hankypranky @summer-novak @emiwrites3reads @shaylybaby2032 @li0nh34rt @tas898 @deanwherescas @shitfaceddaniel-blog @sprnaturallover @wontlookaway @knight-of-gleefulness @untoldshortsofthefandoms @deanwherescas @mycuddlycorner @padf00ts-l0ver @un-lovesherself
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moonstruckme · 8 months ago
Text
Thawing Out
summary: You and Sirius are in dire need of a new coach just weeks before the Olympics. Remus is a former figure skating prodigy forced to retire after a career-ending injury. Though it's not smooth skating right away, those stiff Olympic village beds are dying to be broken in.
collab with @ellecdc
part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | part 5 | part 6 | part 7 | part 8 | part 9 | part 10 | part 11 | part 12 | part 13 | part 14 | part 15 | part 16
cw: modern au, chronic pain
poly!wolfstar x fem!reader ♡ 1.3k words
Remus still wakes before dark every morning. It’s automatic, an urgency and excitement that thrums through him like an old instinct, born from years of his alarm clock rousing him at this time. The rink is always at its best right now, when they’ve just finished resurfacing the ice and no one else is around. It was Remus’ favorite time to practice. 
Now, he has a new reason to get up. His hip clicks as he does it, so he starts his day with a couple of proactive painkillers. If he really wanted to be proactive he would stretch like he’s supposed to, but there’s no time and Remus doesn’t feel like it. He’ll pay his toll for the negligence later. 
The webpage of his Airbnb boasted a five-minute walk to the rink, but with his hip it takes Remus seven. It’s like an odd sort of muscle memory, an old routine from another life that feels as bitter as it does comfortable. He heads out early to give himself some cushion. The streets are empty but for bakers and baristas, the first hints of dawn tinging the sky a deep blue. When he turns a corner and the rink comes into view, the absence of his bag hanging from his shoulder is a phantom ache. 
The front doors are locked but the side one staff uses isn’t, the Zamboni driver already inside. Remus lets himself in, makes a cup of tea from the hot water dispenser they leave out when concessions are closed, plants himself on a bench, and waits. 
And waits. 
And waits. 
Remus has nearly nodded off when two pairs of shoes come bounding up to him. Well, one pair bounds. The other drags. 
“Hi, sorry we’re late.” You’re breathless and hauling a sullen-looking boy along behind you by the hand, but you manage a smile when Remus looks up at you. “I had to run over and get him out of bed. It’s good to meet you!”
You hold out your untethered hand. Remus might normally stand to take it, but he no longer feels like doing you the courtesy. Your grip is firm and warm. 
“You were supposed to be here at six,” he says. 
You wince. “I know. Sorry, Sirius is really not a morning person.” 
Remus thinks that he might put more stock into your apologies if you looked a tad more contrite. As it is, your countenance is almost cheery, a fizzy eagerness about you as you look between him and the ice like you can’t wait to get out on it. 
In stark contrast, the ill-tempered boy behind you seems not to have a clue where he is. He looks rumpled and disoriented, squinting in the rink’s fluorescent light. 
“Then why didn’t you pick another time?” Remus asks. 
He hadn’t realized he was still looking at Sirius, or that the other boy could talk, so it’s a surprise when he answers. “Wasn’t my bloody idea.” 
By the way you grin, Remus wonders if you’ve even heard the obvious bitterness in your partner’s tone, or whether it’s gone straight over your head. 
“I like the rink better early,” you explain. “No one else ever comes before the hockey practice starts at nine, and they’ll have just finished resurfacing the ice.” 
Begrudgingly, Remus nods. “I always preferred it about now, too.” 
He realizes immediately that his agreement was a mistake, because your smile grows into something far too brilliant for the early hour. Christ, what has he gotten himself into? There’s you, starry-eyed and effervescing all over the place, and your partner, who looks more inclined to fall asleep on your shoulder than put on his skates. 
And this is the pair skating duo Remus is supposed to take to the Olympics. 
─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───
“Watch that back foot!” Remus shouts across the ice.
Sirius doesn’t look happy about it, but he corrects the placement of his skate, transitioning smoothly into the next synced turn. 
“Good,” Remus murmurs to himself. 
Once Sirius got out on the ice and woke up a bit, he was good. He skates with the technical proficiency of someone who’s been in the sport since before they started primary school, and the intuitive artistry of someone who loves it. You’re much the same, though your virtuosity and obvious competence are consistently undercut by hesitation, the grace of your movements interrupted when you second-guess yourself. But these—technical prowess paired with devotion—are the basics of what makes a good figure skater. You’ll have to be flawless if you want to do well at the Olympics. 
And Remus has found many flaws. 
“No, no—shit!” Remus stands as you fall out of your jump again, catching yourself on your forearms. “You’re still under-rotating! Come on!” 
Sirius snarls a quick “Hey!” over his shoulder before turning his back on Remus, going to help you up. He speaks to you quietly, checking you over as you stand. Remus seethes. 
He has no clue why he’s been called out here to coach a pair. Remus doesn’t know pairs, has never been a part of one. He was a solo skater. And frankly, it makes him wary that what’s supposed to be the best skating pair in Britain has asked him, a former solo skater who’s been isolated from the figure skating community in general for the past two years, to coach them. But Remus does know figure skating. And he knows when skaters are making stupid mistakes behind their skill level. 
“What aren’t you understanding?” asks Remus as you skate back to the edge of the rink. He really wants to know. “It’s simple. You can do this.” He knows he could have. As easy as breathing, and he would kill to have the chance again. 
“What the fuck is your problem?” 
Sirius’ glare is sharp as knives. He steps off the ice before you can, positioning himself between you and Remus. Your lips purse with a knowing sort of apprehension. 
“Sirius…” 
“No, you don’t talk to her like that,” Sirius spits. “It was a tiny mistake.” 
Remus raises his eyebrows, incredulous. “I’m trying to help her! It was a giant mistake, with a simple fix. You ought to be telling her the same, unless you’re okay with your partner snapping her ankle weeks out from competition.” 
“None of that means you get to fucking yell at her! Who do you think you are?” 
“Okay—” 
“I’m her coach,” says Remus, voice rising, “and—”
“Then coach her! Maybe if you’d give some actual fucking feedback instead of just nitpicking—” 
“Okay!” Your shout cuts through the space, echoing in the empty rink and silencing the other two. “That’s enough.” 
You haul Sirius back by his shoulder. Your grip doesn’t look severe enough to move him, but he goes, stepping back to your side. His eyes never leave Remus’. 
Your own gaze jumps between both boys, that same spark he’d seen in you earlier burning with a different light. 
“Let’s call it for today,” you say firmly. “Okay? We’ll try again tomorrow.” 
Neither boy speaks, though Remus nods. It seems to be taking all of Sirius’ willpower to bite his tongue. He gets the impression it isn’t something he succeeds at often, so Remus isn’t ashamed to say that it brings him a perverse sort of joy to see it now. His tiny bit of smugness fizzles out, though, when your eyes land on him. There’s something desolate in your expression that’s a salient deviation from how you’d looked at him before. Remus has the sinking feeling that he’s disappointed you. It’s more distressing than he can account for. 
“We’ll be here on time tomorrow,” you say in that same steady tone. “And my jump, I’ll work on it.” 
Remus nods again. You return it, and when you turn to leave, you drag Sirius after you by his shirtsleeve, picking up your bags along your way. Remus’ mouth feels dry. His lips are chapped, his fingertips hurt from the cold, and the sight of your skates sinking into the rubbery floor makes his hip ache terribly. 
It’s only once you’re nearly out of earshot that he manages to mumble, “Thank you.”
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dismalflo · 8 days ago
Note
now we need to know what else is going to happen and form between sirius and reader of shitty IT job and part 2 of it!! Maybe u, sirius and a few colleagues go out to have dinner in a restaurant and a waiter or someone is too obsessed with reader and sirius needs to step in? Or when the dinner is over, the group decides to walk around the city a bit and it’s cold and sirius gives u his jacket? Or maybe reader had an allergic reaction to something in the food? Idk, just some ideas
thankyou for requesting!! <3
Sirius Black x reader who's co-worker can't seem to take a hint ✩ 1.2k words
This work is technically a part of a wider drabble series but can be read as a standalone.
part 1 | part 2
cw: office au, creepy co-worker (has a history of asking the reader on dates despite being told no before) but Sirius to the rescue, fluff, maybe a touch of angst at the end, pre-relationship
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When Sirius got up for his second cigarette of the night, muttering, “It’s the only way I’ll survive this, doll,” the pet name slipping out like second nature in the weeks since he first called you it, you found yourself gravitating toward the bar for another drink. The mandatory company dinner had turned into the dullest event of the year. The only redeeming aspects were Sirius and the free booze—though with the former vanishing into a haze of smoke, it was starting to feel like there's just the booze left to keep you company.
As you wait for the bartender to finish your drink, a figure sidles up beside you, a little too close for comfort. You glance over, instinctively stepping back. It’s Jason from the marketing team. He smiles at you with a lopsided grin that doesn't quite match the look in his eyes, the same one he’s been wearing every time he’s asked you out in the last month.
“So, what’s the deal with you tonight?” he asks, his voice a little too familiar, his arm brushing against yours as he leans closer. “I mean, we could have dinner together sometime, right? I promise I’m not like all the other guys around here. I could make it... interesting.” His words hang in the air, an uncomfortable heaviness that makes your stomach churn.
You give him a tight smile, your fingers gripping the edge of the bar a little too tightly. “I’ve told you, Jason. I’m not interested.”
He laughs, clearly not taking the hint. “Come on, don’t be like that. I’m a nice guy, I swear. Just one dinner—what could it hurt?”
Your discomfort grows, but you force yourself to maintain composure. “Jason, I said no. Please respect that.”
He doesn’t move, though. In fact, he leans in a little closer, and the scent of his cologne overwhelms you. His breath is warm against your ear as he says, “Didn’t think you’d be so uptight, always hanging around that weird IT guy. Just one date. No big deal.”
Before you can respond, an arm slides around your shoulders, and you look up to find ‘that weird IT guy’ himself—Sirius. A rush of relief floods through you as the tension in your body melts away, even as Sirius glares daggers at Jason. 
“Are you ready to go?” you know he's talking to you even though his eyes aren’t on you. You agree readily. 
As Sirius starts to guide you away towards the door, he stops to shoot Jason the most insincere smile you’ve ever seen, his voice dropping low. 
“I’d suggest you learn what ‘no’ means because if you do that again it won't end as nicely.” 
With that, he pulls you along, effortlessly grabbing your bag from the table and leading you into the cool night air. The chill feels like a breath of fresh air after the oppressive tension of the room.
Sirius mutters under his breath, “Wanker,” his irritation unmistakable.
“Are you alright?” you ask, wide-eyed and concerned.
He lets out a half-choked laugh. “Are you?”
You shrug, trying to brush it off. “I’m fine. He’ll move on eventually.” Then a surprised giggle escapes you as you think. “Though, I guess you might’ve helped with that.”
At the sound of your laughter, Sirius’s expression softens, a grin tugging at the corners of his mouth.
“Glad I could be of service,” he says, his tone lighter now, though there’s still a glint of annoyance in his eyes. “Did you walk here?” 
“Yeah, I live like ten minutes away.” you reply, while gesturing in the general direction of your flat. 
“Come on then.” He starts walking and you find yourself struggling for words. 
“You– You don't have to walk me home, Sirius.”
“I know I don’t have to but I want to, so I'm going to.” His confidence settles in the air, and somehow, that’s all the confirmation you need. You fall into step beside him, a comfortable silence enveloping the two of you as you walk.
The walk is peaceful, the distant hum of the city mingling with the soft sound of your footsteps on the pavement. Every now and again Sirius’s hand brushes against yours, it’s an accident you think, but it makes your heart do an odd little flip in your chest each time.
Sirius breaks the silence first, his voice quieter than usual. “He really doesn’t get it, does he?”
You chuckle, the tension from earlier a distant memory. “I don’t think he’s ever heard the word ‘no’ before, honestly. I’m just glad you showed up when you did. I wasn’t sure what I was going to do.”
Sirius glances at you, a slight smirk playing on his lips. “I’ve got your back. Always.”
You smile at him, your steps in sync as you walk down the dimly lit streets. The night air is crisp, but you don’t mind. Not when Sirius is right beside you, his presence almost magnetic.
You arrive outside your flat, standing in front of the door as the sound of the city continues its low murmur in the background. For a moment, neither of you speaks. Sirius’ eyes are soft and searching as he looks at you, as if he’s weighing something. His lips part, but he doesn’t say anything right away. He’s close enough now that you can feel the heat radiating from his body, the faintest scent of tobacco lingering around him.
“Thanks,” you say quietly, looking up at him, not sure what exactly you’re thanking him for but knowing it’s more than just walking you home.
Sirius’s eyes flicker down to your lips for just a moment as you finish speaking, and your breath hitches. His gaze locks onto yours, and you both stand there, the tension between you palpable. You can feel your heart race, your pulse quickening.
And then, as if drawn by some invisible force, Sirius leans in. Your breath catches in your throat. It’s happening. You both know it’s happening.
But just as his lips are mere inches from yours, he freezes, his face tightening as if something inside him has shifted. With a sharp breath, he pulls back, putting just enough space between you to break the moment.
“I… I want to kiss you,” he mutters, his voice strained, “God, I do. But not like this.”
You blink, a mix of confusion and disappointment swirling in your chest. “What do you mean?”
Sirius runs a hand through his hair, looking torn. “I don’t want this to be some impulsive thing. Not when fucking Jasons just done what he did.” He takes a deep breath, his gaze steady on yours.
You stand there, the air suddenly thick with the weight of his words. You feel a strange blend of frustration and relief, unsure how to navigate this unexpected shift in the mood.
Sirius steps back, giving you a little more space, his fingers brushing against his temple as if he’s working through something.
“I—” he starts, then stops himself, clearly grappling with what to say. He looks at you, eyes softer now, like he’s searching for the right words. “Look, we can talk about it later, if that’s what you want, but I’ll see you on Monday, yeah?”
You nod, understanding the distance he's trying to create, but also sensing that the space is temporary. "Yeah. Monday."
He gives you a small, almost rueful smile before turning to leave, his steps fading into the night as you watch him go.
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mischievousmoony · 8 months ago
Text
𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚗𝚎𝚠 𝚑𝚒𝚛𝚎
𝚙𝚊𝚛𝚝 𝟻 ⟡ 𝚜𝚒𝚕𝚟𝚎𝚛𝚠𝚊𝚛𝚎
⟢ james potter x fem!reader
⟢ summary: modern restaurant au; you and james complete side work at the end of your shift . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁2.1k
⟢ warnings/tags: coworker!james, coworker!marauders, anxious!reader, not rlly proofread
⟢ the new hire masterlist ⟡ main masterlist
note: dropping lore in this part ig
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"I don't think this restaurant is fancy enough for this to be necessary," you huff, polishing what seems like your millionth spoon.
You're sitting at the rickety break room table, polishing silverware and rolling sets of them into cloths. James is across from you, looking at his reflection in a butter knife.
"No one who eats here is going to care if there are a few water stains on their spoons," you grumble. You're in a bit of a bad mood, this task being the only thing keeping you from going home.
"Nate wants this place to be fancier than it is. Always has," James replies, neatly arranging his knife with the other utensils on the cloth in front of him.
"Always, huh?" you wonder, "Has he always been the manager?"
"As long as I've been here."
"And how long is that?"
"Ah," James pauses in the middle of rolling his napkin, counting in his head, "Technically five years."
You stop in the middle of polishing a fork, looking up to meet James' gaze. "What? Really?" you ask.
James shrugs as if it's nothing, responding, "Started as a busser when I was seventeen. The only person who's been here longer is Remus."
You don't understand the relevance of the comparison, pointing out, "Well, he's older."
James looks at you puzzled, "Remus and I are the same age."
You put the fork down entirely, gaping at James. "Remus is twenty-two?" you ask, your tone conveying your shock.
"Yeah," James says slowly, furrowing his brows, "You didn't know that?"
"No. He looks at least a few years older."
James tilts his head side to side, pondering your comment. "Maybe a little," he admits. "That kitchen wears him down."
You look puzzled as you straighten out the fork you had dropped down on the table, thinking about the revelation that still doesn't quite add up to you.
"If he's our age how in the world is he already a head chef?"
James looks as if he's trying to recall the answer, but comes up short.
"You'd have to ask him. He was hired before me and I guess I never thought to ask that."
"He was a head chef at seventeen?" you ask, eyes widening as your shock doubles.
"No! No, he just worked in the kitchen. Think he was head chef by twenty, though."
"Oh..." you trail off, thinking that makes much more sense than your initial impression. But not by very much. "Still, wow. What about everyone else?"
James' eyebrows raise curiously as he starts polishing yet another spoon.
"What do you mean?"
"They've been here how long?" you clarify.
"Ah. Sirius started about a month after I did. Did you know he started as a server?" James shares the details like it's hot gossip.
To you, it basically is. You can't imagine Sirius doing anything besides bartending at this restaurant.
"Really?"
James smiles at the way your eyes light up in surprise and slight amusement. "Yeah," he confirms. "He absolutely hated it, but doing that he got to train with the bartender before him."
You nod understandingly. It makes sense, you suppose. Bartenders don't just appear out of thin air. You either have to work your way up the ranks or receive formal training, and if you had ever given it any thought, you would have assumed the former.
It dawns on you that you haven't given much thought to your other coworkers at all. Besides what you've naturally found out over the handful of weeks that you've worked here, you don't know much about anyone besides James.
"And the others?"
James blows out some air, thinking, and he takes two rolls of silverware and begins using them as drumsticks against the table. You smile a little at the action.
"Whenever I became a server I recommended Pete for my old busser job. That was probably four years ago."
James had told you stories about him and Peter before, but you wonder how long they've actually known each other.
"How did you know Peter?"
"Known him since primary school."
"Huh," you express your surprise quietly, and James continues on.
"The next hire was Marlene," James smirks as he recalls something. "Actually, she's the reason Lily and Mary were hired."
"Did she recommend them too?"
James chuckles, shaking his head as he explains, "No, Marlene was always complaining about too much testosterone in this place. I think five.. six months after she started, she told Nate that a customer said that they thought management must be sexist because of the lack of girl hires."
"Did someone actually say that?" you ask skeptically.
"No," James laughs, "He totally bought it though cause he hired Lily and Mary a week later. Worked out great for them in the end. You know they go to uni in the city? They’re both here to support themselves through it.”
Your bottom lip finds itself between your teeth as you think about how long everyone has worked here. They’ve all had years to get to know each other. You have already been feeling like an outsider, so learning this just amplifies that tenfold.
James puts his makeshift drumsticks away when he notices you getting lost in thought.
“What’s on your mind?”
Your eyes flash to him, startled out of your train of thought. Shrugging, you try to brush it off and return to your duties to the silverware.
“C’mon, I always know when you’re getting lost in that head of yours,” James says with a teasing yet affectionate tone.
You purse your lips, knowing the chances of James letting this go are slim.
"I just… I don't really know much about them at all I guess. Do they..." you trail off, apprehensive to admit your insecurities.
"What?" James probes gently, softening at your hesitation.
"I’m worried they don't like me,” you admit.
"What!? Why? You’re great! Why wouldn’t anyone like you?” James says it earnestly without a hint of hesitation, and that alone makes you feel a bit better.
You keep your hands busy with the silverware, your eyes focusing intently on the water stains you polish away so that you don’t have to face James as you explain.
“I feel like I haven’t made much of an effort to get to know them. I was nervous, I guess, to talk to new people. Now I’m even more nervous because it’s been so long and I haven’t even tried. They’re going to think–”
“Hey, hey, hey,” James stops you from snowballing into a self-deprecating ramble, placing a hand over yours across the table, also stopping the way you’re polishing a spoon to death.
He dips his head down to try to meet your eyes, which are trained intently on the table. “No one thinks anything,” he says patiently. “Actually, you know what I’ve heard? I’ve heard them say that you’re kind. Maybe a tad shy, but that’s not a bad thing!” The last few words tumble out in a rush, James being worried that you’d take it negatively when he really finds your timid nature so endearing.
Your gaze slowly shifts to meet his eyes. “It’s hard for me to warm up to new people,” you admit, your voice low.
James absentmindedly strokes the back of your hand with his thumb, “You got on with me just fine.”
“You’re different,” you say before you can give it much thought. You would’ve bit your tongue if you had.
“How am I different?” he asks, his eyes twinkling with something you can’t quite place.
“I-I don’t know you just are.”
It’s true, you’re not sure why but after your first day you were already comfortable with James, more than comfortable if you’re being honest. He quickly became your favorite part about this job.
He simply accepts your answer. Normally, he’d say something witty or teasing, but he finds himself at a loss for words.
The conversation fades into silence, neither of you knowing how to proceed, both overwhelmed with confusing feelings.
James can’t stop looking at where his hand rests over yours, not knowing how to retract it. Not wanting to.
Meanwhile, you search your brain for something to say, something that would change the subject. You don’t feel the need to keep talking about this anyway. Although, you’re not sure if you feel better about the situation with your other coworkers or if you’ve just been distracted from it.
“So, five years, huh?” you start.
"Technically," he emphasizes. He slowly retracts his hand as the conversation takes on a more casual tone.
You had barely even noticed his hand there with how natural it felt, but now that it’s gone your hand almost feels cold. You distract yourself by rolling more silverware.
"What does that mean?" you ask.
"I, er, pursued other things for a little while. Didn't work out, so I ended up back here."
You can’t help but wonder what he means, so you ask, "What things?"
James stammers, him now the apprehensive one.
"Sorry,” you say quickly, “I don't mean to pry."
"No, it's okay,” James waves off your worries, “I was playing rugby."
“What, like, professionally?” you ask, not expecting him to say yes.
“Er, yeah," he admits, twirling a butter knife in between his fingers.
You freeze. “Wait. Seriously?”
“Yes,” he chuckles airily.
He notices how your mouth is slightly agape, twitching as it forms the shape of words which never leave your lips. He can tell you’re wondering what happened, but you’re too polite to ask.
“I hurt my knee,” he continues, purposefully avoiding the specifics, “so ended up back here.”
Your face crumples in sympathy. "Oh. Oh, I-I'm sorry," you say, genuine compassion in your tone.
“It’s fine. I’ve come to terms with it," James says honestly. His career was brief— barely even got a chance to start— and while he'll always wonder what could've been, he's not angry about the way his life is turning out.
"So what about you? What would you be doing if you didn't work here?" James suddenly asks you.
"I never went to uni," you say, thinking of Lily and Mary— your age and likely almost done with their studies. "I would've liked to. I don't even know what for."
"You still could."
"Yeah, maybe," you say tentatively, rolling you're last set of cutlery. "That's all my side work. Want me to help with yours?"
"No, you get out of here, I'll be alright," James assures, not wanting to put extra work on your plate, recalling how annoyed you've been with this task.
You nod, standing from the table to collect your things from your locker. You bid him goodbye as you sling your bag over your shoulder.
"I'll see you tomorrow, James."
"Bye, love," he says fondly, waving with a fork in his hand as you go.
On your way out, you pass Sirius, giving him a small wave and a barely audible "goodnight" as he joins James in the break room.
"Night, doll," he calls down the hall as he turns into the room.
Sirius has a wide, knowing smirk on his face when he locks eyes with James.
"Rolling silverware?" Sirius asks, his tone dripping with his amusement.
James shrugs, "Yeah, so?"
Sirius tilts his head, chuckling, "I thought your side work was to prep garnishes today."
"Ah," James fumbles with some silverware as he responds, "I finished that ages ago. So, I offered to do Lily's side work."
"Oh, did you?" Sirius says with mock surprise.
"Yup. Just doing a favor for a friend," James grins innocently.
"Or trying to get some alone time with that work crush of yours."
"I do not have a work crush!" James quickly defends, feeling the heat rising to his cheeks. He almost feels guilty, Sirius is at least right about the alone time part. James still misses having you by his side as a trainee, but after you're conversation today he feels bad about stealing you away from your other coworkers.
Sirius raises his hands in the air, "Alright, mate. Whatever you say."
"You're a prat. Why don't you come help me with this?"
Sirius looks incredulous at the suggestion, "I'm not the one who volunteered to do extra work!"
James rolls his eyes, picking up one of the many forks he has left. But truth be told, he didn't quite mind having to do the extra work— spending time with you made it well worth it.
Sirius snorts at the sudden lovesick look on James' face when he gets lost in his thoughts, and makes a mental note to wager a bet with Remus tomorrow on how long James will last.
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ethereacals · 10 days ago
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can't fight the moonlight
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synopsis: Remus is electrified by your werewolf inspired costume
trope: costume party (it’s fun)
pairings: remus lupin x reader
cw: maybe a bit suggestive if you read into it
divider creds: @enchanthings
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“DEEP IN THE DARK YOU’LL SURRENDER YOUR HEART.” Were the lyrics blasting out of the speakers in the Gryffindor common room.
Remus watched closely as your hips swayed side to side with the rhythm of the music, unbeknownst to him— his hand clutched his glass of fire whiskey.
“Nice pirate costume, mate!” Sirius barked over the crowd, the former adorned in black drapes and skulls.
“Thanks, and— what exactly are you meant to be?” Remus cocked his head, puzzled.
“Hades, clearly.” Sirius scoffed, and he leaned on James for support.
“He insisted.” James said from beside him, the boy dressed as Persephone.
“Hm.” Remus nodded, maybe you two could have done a matching costume— if you didn’t get in a small disagreement earlier.
The full moon was approaching, and Remus had reprimanded you earlier that day.
You were just trying to check on him— but he knew how he got during that time.
Uncontrollable.
And the moon was clearly fucking with him tonight, since you were here.
You were dressed as a werewolf, of course.
Fluffy ears on your head, a grey babydoll dress— Merlin, you were really messing with him.
You caught him staring at you, and you knew your master plan had worked.
To make him jealous.
Remus could barely take it anymore.
He pushed past clusters of students and reached for your arm, his fingers grasped tightly at your wrist as he tugged you away from the crowd.
“R—Remus—“ You tried.
“Where’s the confidence now, hm?” He asked, his arms crossing over his chest as he cornered you.
“Look, I—“
“You don’t understand what you’re doing to me.” He whispered, his breath fanning your ear.
“I do, actually.” You mused, your eyes drooping down to… somewhere.
Remus groaned, as he tried to lean in and kiss you.
“Nope.” You pressed your index finger over his lips.
“Not till you say sorry.” The poor thing looked like a rejected puppy.
“I’m very, very, very, sorry.” He apologized between soft kisses on your neck.
“And?” You crossed your arms.
“And you can share my chocolate with me…” He answered, smiling sweetly.
“Oh, alright.” You murmured, your lips crashing against his.
-
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persephone-writes · 3 months ago
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A Diviner's Guide to James Potter
Chapter Nineteen: Yours, James
James Potter x Fem!Gryffindor!Reader
Chapter Eighteen - Chapter Twenty ☆ Series Masterlist
Description: You and James are forced to deal with the highly eventful nature of Saturday night
Word Count: 5.6k
The scarlet curtains of your four-poster were closed, though not well. You threw an arm over your face to block out the sunlight shining through the gap, turning over with a groan. Your attempt to go back to sleep did not last long, a rush of adrenaline surging through your veins as the memories of last night flooded your mind. 
James’s lips, your giggling as he whispered in your ear, the cloak over you both as he led you back to the common room, slipping back inside the party, or at least what was left of it. 
You had found Marlene strewn out on the sofa, clearly rather drunk. Sirius was still there as well, half heartedly flirting with a girl in your class, his wine-stained smile strained. There were only stranglers left, the morning fast approaching. Marlene asked you where you went, but you only said you took a walk, which was good enough for her in her hazy state. She told you Lily and Dorcas had already gone to bed, leaving you to follow in their footsteps. As you went to head up the stairs, you glanced back at James, waving his wand across a table littered with empty bottles and cigarette ash. His eyes found yours, sparkling like twin stars. 
You sat up in bed, your hands fisting into your blanket as your heart pounded. You couldn’t tell if what you were feeling was joy or dread, or perhaps an unnatural mixture of the two. Even through your racing thoughts, the unmistakable gnaw of guilt dug its way to the surface. You pressed the heels of your hands into your eyes, your stomach churning as you pondered what the fuck you were going to do. 
You took a deep breath, peeking through the curtains. Lily and Marlene’s beds were empty, though Dorcas still seemed to be in hers, likely sleeping off a wicked hangover. Hesitantly, you tiptoed to the bathroom, shutting the door softly behind you. You caught your reflection in the mirror, mildly a wreck, a little tired, though not too bad given the circumstances. 
You filled the basin with water, scrubbing your face as if it would rid you of last night's deeds. You could still feel the cold wind on your skin, the touch of his lips to yours, his voice like honey as he told you he loved you. You had gotten exactly what you wanted, the thing you had dreamt of countless nights, though it still wasn’t enough. You wanted James risk-free, you wanted to be with him and still have Lily as your best friend, no complications. You leaned your hands on the edge of the sink, you head hung towards your chest. 
A bitter laugh bubbled from you, a last ditch effort to try and come to terms with what you were faced with. At least at the present moment, you recognized two options: preserve your friendship with Lily at all costs, or put it in jeopardy. The former meant pushing James away, the latter meant continuing whatever was going on with him. As you stuck your toothbrush into your mouth, a permanent crease in your brow, you wondered what was going on with him. You hadn’t exactly defined your relationship the night prior, though it was safe to assume you could no longer consider him just a friend. 
By the time you got dressed, you still had no idea what you were going to do. You weren’t sure if you wanted to see James when you went down to the common room, unsure of how you would act, what you would say around the others. For all you knew, everyone could already know. If you had it your way, you’d run over to him, wrap your arms around his neck and kiss him like you had last night. But you couldn’t, shouldn’t, not with so much at stake. 
You descended the stairs with bated breath, your hands shaking as you saw Lily drinking a cup of tea in one of the armchairs nestled in the corner, a textbook in her lap. She was entirely alone and did not seem angry in the slightest. You couldn’t help but stare at her for a moment, memorizing the peaceful expression on her face, the color of her hair like the mountains in autumn. It felt as if every second was precious, every day she still loved you to be remembered fondly. 
She looked up from her work as you approached, offering you a kind smile, another thing to recall once she never wanted to speak to you again. You forced a casual look as you threw yourself into the seat across from her, still unable to meet her eyes. 
“Long night?” she asked, chuckling a bit at your demeanor, which she must have taken for grogginess.
“You could say that,” you said, glancing around the common room. “Where is everyone?”
“Marlene’s in the Library with Mary. I don’t know where the guys are.”
You raised your brows. “You didn’t go with them?”
“I wanted to wait for you,” she said, her lips pulling into a line. She hesitated a moment before speaking, careful with her words, “Are you all right, after what happened last night?” 
You nodded, preparing yourself for a whole new set of lies. Instead of pretending you didn’t like him at all, now you had to pretend that you both weren’t hopelessly in love with each other. 
You swallowed, trying to prepare yourself as much as you could, “Yeah, I just got a bit shaken, s’all. I needed to get out of the party for a minute, take a walk.”
You held your breath again, the air thick as you waited for her to react. She didn’t seem to feel any of your nervousness, nodding as she closed her book and grabbed her cup. 
“Lets get some breakfast,” she said, standing with a small smile.  
You were hungry, though for the first time in your life, you didn’t want to be alone with her. Usually it was James you had to avoid, skirting around invitations, excusing yourself to do your homework. Unfortunately for you, that would not work with Lily. She would catch on right away, cornering you with that sympathetic look of hers, practically forcing you into telling her what was going on. You could never resist it, hence why she knew every single secret of yours, except for one. 
“Sure,” you said, having no other choice. 
Realistically, you wondered how long you could keep it from her even with all your lies. For now she seemed none the wiser, pleased as she carried her things with her as you headed out of the common room. Behind you in the corridor the Fat Lady was singing an Italian opera, just out of pitch enough to raise the hair on the back of your neck.  
“No, per pieta, sei mia! V’aspenttan gli amici. Gia mi mandi via?”
Lily glanced behind back, watching as the Fat Lady swayed as if she were basking in the lights of the Teatro La Fenice. “Lovely work!” she said, smiling as the Fat Lady stopped, giggling girlishly. 
“My painter, Lorenzo Matero, said I was made for the stage,” said the Fat Lady, brushing a curling strand of hair from her face. She continued to sing, just as poorly as before, “Vorrei dir, ma non osso. Di! Se venissi con voi?”
You both scurried down the corridor towards the staircase, trying to keep your snickers down. 
When you were far enough away, Lily sighed, shaking her head with another laugh. “Even if she’s awful, I think I'd miss it if she stopped.”
“Really?” you asked, looking at her from the corner of your eye. 
She shrugged. “It’s sort of sweet, right?”
“Yeah, in a way,” you said, smiling despite your ever-present anxiety. It was hard not to smile around Lily. “I wonder how she learned them.”
“Maybe there was a student who was really into opera,” Lily suggested.
You laughed, “Well if there was, they have any idea what kind of trouble they caused.”
“I thought we agreed it was nice,” she said, her eyes playfully narrowed. 
You didn’t say anything for a moment, your hands finding their way into your pockets. “You think everything is nice.”
You were able to get through your early lunch in the kitchens without passing out from the stress, though it wasn’t easy. At every chance you turned the conversation towards one of your shared classes, discussing your Charms assignment or your trouble studying for the upcoming N.E.W.T.s. Thankfully, Lily seemed just as happy to go over the boring details of Transfiguration theory as anything else. You nodded along, trying your best not to let the festering guilt show in your expression. 
You grew more jittery on your way back to Gryffindor Tower, realizing it was becoming more and more imperative to your mental wellbeing that you talked with James. You feared he would be around every corner, waiting to ambush you with declarations of love like he had done with Lily a few years ago. The memory made your chest tight, a sliver of insecurity weaseling its way past the airy, spirited feeling of new love. 
When you and Lily entered the common room you thought you might faint. Having worked yourself up during the long walk back, the sight of James, Remus, Sirius, and Peter by the fire was nearly enough to push you over the edge. With no other choice, you followed Lily to the group, hoping you were a prized actress. 
“How's the headaches?” Lily teased, looking around at them. 
Sirius stretched out his legs with a cocky smile, his jeans riding up to reveal mismatched socks, again. “None for me, sister.”
Although he seemed recovered, Sirius was a little paler than normal, a slight tinge of purple under his eyes. It looked less unkempt on him than it would on anyone else, like a rockstar after a show. Remus was fine, of course, Peter only sleep deprived. James…well, James looked as handsome as ever, though you were not an unbiased judge. His curls were untamed, his arm thrown over the back of the sofa. The sight of him made your heart leap, everything in you screaming to simply let your eyes soften as you looked at him. 
You fought against it, leaning against the back of the armchair that Peter was sitting in before poking your head down. “How many did you have last night?” 
Peter shrugged weakly, scrunching his nose as he turned to look up at you. “Didn’t count.”
“You should’ve seen Meadowes,” said Sirius with a bark of laughter. “She went double or nothing in Sparks with Moony.”
“Now, why would you let her do that, Remus?” Lily sighed, giving him a strong look of disapproval.
“Free will,” he said, his smile small but cheeky. 
Lily shook her head, though it was rare she stayed upset with him. In a few minutes his wrongdoings would be entirely forgotten. 
“Won’t share any of your potion with her?” you asked Sirius, trying your best not to let your eyes drift to James, who had been staring at you since you arrived. You felt your face heating, your fingers digging into the cushion of the chair. 
“Of course he won’t,” Remus said. 
Sirius glared at James and Remus, who were each laughing at him, flicking his head to get his hair out of his eyes. “It’s a bitch to make,” he said, scoffing as if it would make it better. “It’s her fault, anyway. Who goes double or nothing against him?”
Lily pursed her lips, glancing at the girl’s staircase. “I should go check on her. She might want me to bring her up some lunch.”
You watched her closely as she left, flying up the staircase with her textbook tucked under her arm. Before you could stop yourself, you turned back to James, pushing off the armchair with newfound bravery. 
“I was wondering if I could ask you a question about a spell I want to try for dueling. I found it in the library, but I’ve never heard of it before.”
“What spell is that?” Sirius asked with a smirk, bloodcurdling and conniving. 
“Oh, uh,” you faltered, quickly trying to make up a spell in your head. “Ingarius scintillum. Ever heard of it?”
His stare was like hot ice, freezing you over. “No, I haven’t,” he said slowly, his head tilting as his eyes roved over you. 
James stood, his face lacking any acknowledgment of what he surely knew was a ploy to get him alone. He skirted around Remus’s legs, moving towards you. 
“C’mon, we shouldn’t talk about it here anyway,” he said, his voice a bit clipped towards the end. 
He glanced back at Sirius, though you could only see the latter’s expression, still enjoying the show. He placed a hand on your shoulder, sending a spark running down your arm as he turned you around towards the portrait. You could hear a soft snicker from Sirius as you went out into the corridor, relaxing when you were finally free of his teasing. 
You didn’t have enough time to fully appreciate the fact that you were alone before he grabbed your hand, motioning down the hall. “Let’s get out of here.”
With your fingers entwined, he pulled you towards the south side of the castle, the corridors encircling courtyards frequented by Gryffindors looking to study outside. There was nothing much this way but old lookouts from a bygone era when Hogwarts acted as a battleground. You hoped this place would never see that again, remaining untainted by the harshest realities of the war. 
In a matter of minutes there wasn’t a student or professor in sight, James hiding you each away in a small alcove, its rounded window overlooking Hogsmeade in the distance. He dropped your hand, a faint smile on his lips as he looked at you, lit by the rays bursting through a cloudless sky. You smiled as well, unable to stop yourself. You felt giddy, and as you had put it to Marlene all those weeks ago, thirteen again. Even so, this was entirely different from all the other teenage flings that scattered your past like rogue ink blots on an otherwise presine paper. You had never been in love, and no one had been in love with you. It was a new, undeniably fantastic feeling, blinding you to all else. 
“Hi,” you whispered, your voice catching in your throat. 
“Hi,” he said back, more amused than anything. After a beat his smile dropped, though not completely. The longer he remained silent, the more you thought he seemed nervous, perhaps for the first time since you’ve known him. “You still feel the same, right?” he asked, as if doubtful of his own words. 
Taken up by the excitement of your covert meeting, you momentarily forgot about the guilt eating away at you. The heaviness in your chest was replaced by sparks of heady joy, beguiled by his uncertainty. You grinned, lost in the look of him. “Of course, I do.”
He brightened, practically glowing. “I— really?”
“Yeah, really,” you laughed, shaking your head at him. Soon, however, the feeling settled, leaving you to remember the purpose of getting him alone in the first place. You bit your lip, sighing as you broke the moment. “We have to talk about this, how we’re gonna do things,” you said, watching as his smile dropped away to furrowed brows. 
“What d’you mean?”
“You and me,” you said, motion between you. “Our situation is a little abnormal, don’t you think?”
“What’s abnormal about it? We were mates and now we’re in love. It’s fairly typical, when you think about it,” he said with a shrug. He seemed eager to continue your initial conversation, his fingers hanging off the pockets of his jeans. 
You took a moment to think of how you could word it, knowing that in a way, he was right. However, the fact that he and Lily had dated seemed to conveniently slip his mind. 
“I know you don’t think Lily will be upset, but I really think she might be miffed with me,” you said, cringing at the thought of having to tell her you kissed her ex boyfriend. “Just imagine that Sirius started dating Lily. How would you feel?”
James paused to consider this scenario, his face becoming mildly repulsed. “That’s completely different. It’s Sirius. He’s my mate and all…but you have to admit that's different than you and me.” 
You crossed your arms, unconvinced. “How so?” 
“Number one, that’d never happen,” he began, completely sure of his statement. “Number two, it’s Sirius.”
You rolled your eyes, though he did have a point. Your arms fell to your sides again, twitchy and in need of something to do. “What about Remus, then?”
“I’d be fine,” he said enthusiastically. “Sure, it’d be weird seeing them together at first, but I’d get over it. It might actually make me happy, Remus is a good guy.”
“It’s just different with us. I don’t know how to explain it,” you said, your shoulders slumping. 
He stepped in front of you, forcing you to look him in the eyes. You had always loved them, the color, the shape, the way they unabashedly told you how he felt. Now, it was love. 
“I love you, Y/N. And Godric, I’ve fancied you for—” he stopped, swallowing as his gaze darted across your face, hurried yet distinctly sentimental. You wished you didn’t have business to attend to, for any other time you would have kissed him silly. “Whatever happens, even if she’s absolutely livid, it’ll be okay in the end. Even if Sirius started dating Lily I’d get over it eventually. I’d just have to.”
“How long?” you asked, the question falling out of you before you could think. 
“How long what?”
“How long have you fancied me?” 
Your heart raced as you watched his blush deepen, pink across his cheeks. He smiled sheepishly, his gaze drifting away. For once, you were the one watching him sweat. 
“Tell me,” you said, trying to stop yourself from laughing. 
He resisted for a few more seconds, slowly cracking under your scrutiny. He dipped his head down, his hair flopping onto his forehead. “Since last year,” he mumbled. 
“Last year!” you exclaimed, far louder than you should have. “When last year?” you asked quickly, the idea that you and James had been fawning over each other for this long nearly too much to process. 
He shrugged, still uncharacteristically shy. A guilty part of you reveled in it, though not enough to drag it out any longer. You wanted to know, and you wanted to know now. 
“C’mon,” you begged, slowly dying the longer he held out. 
“You’re not gonna like it,” he said warily. You only stared at him, urging him to speak. “It may have been a contributing factor to me and Lily, y’know, throwing in the towel.”
Your mouth hung open for a moment, searching his expression for falsehoods. You found none. “Merlin’s beard, are you kidding me?”
“I didn’t tell her that, of course, but I feel like she had a pretty good idea,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck. 
“What do you mean…a pretty good idea?” you asked, dread rushing like a cold sweat from your head to your feet.
“I don’t know,” he said, his hand flying from his neck in an exacerbated fit. “I just have a feeling she might know something. I have to be at least somewhat obvious, cause Padfoot’s been on my arse for a month now—”
“Oh, that's my fault,” you said with an apologetic, somewhat embarrassed expression. His perplexity was evident, his mouth ajar as he stared at you. You sighed, your head hanging for a moment as you prepared to explain yourself. “He knows that I fancy you. He found out the night of the quidditch match in February.”
His eyes widened. “Thats why you’ve been so pissy with him! I felt like I was going mad.” 
“He’s been the worst. I told Marlene in the corridor during the party, and then he found out where we were on the map and talked to a fucking portrait. Said he was bored, the little shit,” you grumbled, pausing for a moment as you remembered his earlier statement. “Why do you think Lily knows?” 
“Did she ever tell you about when we broke up?” he asked, his voice back down to a whisper. 
“Sort of,” you began, casting your mind back to the day. You had all stayed up the entire night in your dormitory, Marlene cursing James out the entire time. Lily was quiet, though not in awful spirits, insistent that it was for the best. “She said that you guys fought too much, but that she was the one who thought you two should break up. She said it was— I don’t know— amicable in the end.”
It felt wrong to discuss it with James, almost sinful, especially after last night. You wished you didn’t have to, that things were different. 
He nodded, shoving his hands back into his pockets. “That's basically it. But when we were talking about it she said something to me, and it made me think that she knew, and it scared me shitless at the time,” he let out a short breath from his nose, almost chuckling at the memory. You didn’t say anything, waiting for him to drop the dungbomb. “She said something like we weren’t meant for eachother, and that she knew she wasn’t the one I wanted to be with anymore. She thought we should just cut our losses. At first I didn’t really know what she meant by the second part, but I figured I wouldn’t argue, because she was right. We weren’t meant for each other.” 
You took a breath, gnawing at your lip. “You really think she meant me?”
His adams apple bobbed, his face blank for a beat before his expression relaxed, his mouth barely turning up at the corners. “Do you remember when you had that History of Magic project where you had to research an invention within the last century, and you chose Sleekeazy’s?”
“Yeah,” you said, a bit embarrassed given the hindsight. You ended up sending a few letters back and forth with Mr. Potter, who was kind enough to answer all your questions, almost overjoyed that someone would ask. 
“When you asked me if you could, do you remember what I said to you?” he asked, a small twinkle in his eyes. 
You laughed a bit, having no clue where he was going with any of this. “No, I don’t.”
“I said, ‘He’ll be so happy, he’ll think he’s hearing wedding bells.’ And then you said something like, ‘You’re ridiculous, James!’” his voice went high-pitched, the worst impression ever given, though you still laughed. “And you did that, you laughed, and I remember thinking, Godric, I’m in trouble, cause I want to hear her laugh forever,” he stopped, as if he was chewing his words before he said them. “Lily was there, she saw the way I looked at you. When I saw that she saw, I hoped she didn’t catch it, but in the back of my mind I knew that she would. How could she not?”
You didn’t know what to say, your mouth opening and then closing again. Nothing made sense any longer, all your previous notions having flown out the window. You wondered if he could be right, if Lily really had caught on to his crush. Did that mean she knew about yours as well? 
Despite all of this, you threw yourself into his chest like you had wanted to all day, letting him squeeze you so tightly it was almost too much. Everything was nearly perfect, so close it was all the more painful that it wasn’t. But for now, this was heaven. 
James placed his hand on your jaw, tilting your head to look at him. He seemed stricken by something wonderful, a fleeting poignancy crossing his face before he pressed his lips to yours. It was a kiss that could turn the world to gold. Your heart was still racing when you each pulled away, fuzzy with the feeling of him.
“We don’t have to tell anyone, if you don’t want,” he began, hesitant as his gaze drifted from yours, down to your lips and over your cheeks. Wherever his eyes went you felt beautiful, more than you ever have in your entire life. 
You could tell he wanted to speak more, though he wouldn’t meet your eyes, his bright smile fading. You frowned, moving just slightly away from where you were buried in his chest. 
“I’m sorry, James,” you said, a new kind of guilt taking over. “We can tell them, if you want, if it means that much to you.”
All at once you decided that you’d do a lot more for him than you had thought. It almost frightened you how much you’d give for him, though you realized it was most certainly the same on his end, maybe even worse if you were to believe Marlene. Still, you wanted to hold whatever you had with him out longer, keep it hidden in all its magnificence just until it felt a bit more real. Even if he was right, if Lily already knew and it would all turn out okay, your love seemed safe in its privacy, as if anything outside of it had no effect. In your distorted, love-stricken vision, right now no one was real except for you and him.
“It’s not that,” he said, again growing unsteady, nervous as he held you. “It’s just— you’re my girl, right?”
You stopped your effervescence from flowing out in the form of a celebratory laugh, choosing instead to grin, reaching your hand up to brush his temple with the back of your fingers. You twirled one of his dark curls, soft to the touch. “I’ve always been your girl.”
-✧₊∘₊✧──────✧₊∘₊✧──────✧₊∘₊✧-
Sunday had been filled with a never ending anxiety over your friends noticing a difference in either you or James, though neither of you had yet to give it away within twenty-four hours. Over breakfast on Monday, a few comments were made about the way James seemed to buzz in his seat even more so than usual, though he was able to brush them off with a joke, punctuated by a single, charming smile. Unlike James, your newfound avidity for the existence in a star-fated love had kept you up all night long, leaving your Monday self to pay the price in the form of half-lidded eyes and the desire to skive off.
You left the library for History of Magic, daydreaming about the way James had looked at you when you parted ways in the Entrance Hall as you turned down the window lined corridor above the courtyard. Your sweet imaginings, laced with the knowledge that you’d see him again in just over an hour, were cut short when you heard the sound of your name being called out behind you. The voice was distinctly girlish, somehow breathy even as it strained against the sound of the students in the corridor. You turned around, seeing Sybill zigzagging through the crowd, frantically waving a hand. You stopped, growing a bit embarrassed as she reached you, her heavy bag whipping forward. 
“Your aura!” she said, her eyes wide. “It had improved before, but now— did you take the Animaura Draught?”
You cringed at her volume, hoping that no one had been listening very closely. It didn’t seem so, though that didn’t stop you from speaking just loud enough for her to hear, “No, I went the natural route.” 
She didn’t seem to catch our sarcasm, her mouth parting as she continued to look you over in amazement. “It’s a most vibrant shade of cerise, maybe a bit of rose around the edges…have you had a transcendental experience recently?”
You shook your head, taken aback by her question. What would count as transcendental, anyway?
“Not that I can recall,” you answered. 
She hummed, pursing her lips, her hands wringing around the strap of her bag. “How interesting. Has Professor Quattlebaum mentioned it to you at all?”
“No,” you said, pulling up the sleeve of your robe to check your watch. It was nearly eleven forty-five, meaning the bell tower would soon ring in the start of third period. “I have to go, Sybill, I’m sorry.”
“Oh, yes, I have Transfiguration,” she sighed, almost sadly. “Perhaps I will see you later.”
You stared at her, mildly perplexed as she walked past you. She only got a few paces away before you called out to her, more confused than ever, “Wait! How do you know my name?”
She stopped, spinning around with the countenance of a mildly intrigued rabbit. “Oh, did you not tell it to me?” she asked, her voice far off. 
You slowly shook your head, her curiosity obviously diminishing. 
“What a funny thing, though I do have a way with names,” she said, continuing again down the corridor. You let her go, watching as her hair bounced behind her like a flaxen cotton ball. 
“Don’t be a dick,” Dorcas huffed, trying to snatch the Prophet from Sirius, who was having far too much fun evading her attempts. 
He pulled it away one more time before allowing her to take it, cackling as she ripped it from his hands. She flipped through the pages, groaning when she saw the quidditch scores. 
“Tutshill is such shite this season,” she said, throwing the paper back down into Sirius’s lap.
It was late, the common room quiet and rather empty. You were fighting off the urge to go to sleep despite spending the day pining for your bed. You simply couldn’t bring yourself to leave, as if James wouldn’t be there in the morning. You hadn’t been alone with him since Sunday, his quidditch practice leaving you both unable to excuse yourself to the RoR after classes. 
You tried not to look lovestruck as you watched him, perched on the arm of the sofa as he and Dorcas began debating the likelihood of the Wimborne Wasps making it to the quidditch world cup. Soon, Sirius was chiming in with his own predictions, talking up Puddlemere in the process. Within a matter of minutes the conversation had derailed into Sirius’s passionate retelling of the 1974 League Cup final, in which Puddlemere beat Ballycastle against incredible odds. 
Dorcas and James were rapidly losing interest, Dorcas rolling her eyes as Sirius went on about the final play. Your gaze met James’s, a fleeting expression of infatuation crossing his face before he turned away again, ready to pick on Sirius to save himself from suspicion. 
“That was four years ago,” he said, waving a dismissive hand in his direction. “After they got Fanthorne it was the beginning of the end. Puddlemere oughta to fire him, he’s the worst coach in the league.” 
Peter nodded, moving to speak before Sirius shot him a look of warning. He threw up a hand, burying himself back into his chair.  
“It’s just an off season,” said Sirius, turning back to James. “They shouldn’t have resigned Turner s’all.”
“You like Fanthorne?” Dorcas drawled, side-eying him. 
Sirius sunk down into the sofa, shrugging her off. “Yeah, I think he’s pretty good.”
Dorcas snorted, “You’re in denial. He’s fucking awful.”
“Always has to be quidditch, doesn’t it?” you teased, your cheeks warming at James’s laugh. Ever since Saturday night, every smile he gave you, every laugh meant something greater. You knew you shouldn’t read into every little word, every shift in his expression, though it felt impossible not to. I made him laugh, and he loves me, you’d think, each time without fail. It only made it worse with the knowledge that he thought the same.
“You’re telling me,” Remus muttered.
“They can’t help themselves,” said Lily, looking up from her spot on the carpet where she was playing a game of wizards chess with Marlene. “It’s in their nature.”
“There isn’t anything natural about liking Tutshill,” Sirius said, proud of his own cleverness. 
It was getting harder and harder to keep your eyes open, even if James was in front of you. You yawned, curling up more into your armchair, your head resting in your palm. 
Marlene twisted around, laughing at your state. “Go to bed,” she said, moving to shove your knee. “You look like you’re about to pass out.”
“Thanks, Marls,” you droned as you sat up, finally willing to give in to necessity. 
She only rolled her eyes, turning back around. 
You grabbed your bag lying on the floor, heaving it over your shoulder before saying goodnight, your gaze lingering on James a moment longer than the rest. He smiled softly, biting his lip to stop himself from breaking out into a grin. 
“Goodnight, sweet prince,” Lily called as you went towards the stairs, her voice like wind chimes. 
You laughed, though it tasted sour on your tongue. 
When you got back to your dormitory you began unpacking your books, replacing them with those you’d need for tomorrow. As you placed your Transfiguration notes onto your desk, a slip of parchment fell out, dancing like a feather to the floor. You picked it up and unfolded it, butterflies fluttering in your stomach as you saw the handwriting, nearly illegible. 
Meet me by the vegetable patch tomorrow after fourth period.
Yours, James  
Chapter Twenty
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