#forgot to tag this. prolly why no one saw it lmfao

[imsort-ofokay]

im gonna fuck your mom

[z-odiology]

THE SIGNS AS COLLEGE STUDENTS

Aries: that one kid that fits the whole college stereotype. frat boy. prob got a rep as a cheater but secretly loyal af. parties all the time. “there was homework? when?” jock. probably bullies nerds.

Taurus: he doesn’t gaf abt anything. skips class, dozes off, finals can eat their ass. probably the kid who pulls his shit during senior year. “when’s finals?” “right fucking now what the fuck david”

Gemini: hOly shit the fucking weird kid that you don’t wanna fw. creepy ass kid man. you have to be nice or else u ain’t gonna be safe LMFAO. they prolly have your social security number js ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Cancer: the sweet one who’s just a bit too sweet. sorority girl. “hi!! you should join, we accept everyone!! :))” the likable one cause she ain’t fake. is a cokehead.

Leo: sports sports sports. bio? “ALPHA KAPPA DELTA 💯 GOD 1ST 🙏 LACROSSE ‘22 10.12.15 JEN 💖🍷” not the sharpest tool in the shed but the biggest muscle they have is their heart.

Virgo: that fuckin kid that can’t shut the fuck up like jesus fucking christ kristen no one gives a fuck if you and sheridan made out with the same guy goddamn. “LAST NIGHT ME AND LAINEY WENT TO MARK’S PARTY AND I SAW PROFESSOR WILLIAMS DRINKING!” ok bitch but there’s something called minding your own fucking business

Libra: her dorm is a party room and her roommate is the DJ. she’s the party goer who loves to party and drink and she probably got a DUI at least twice. “oh yeah, i finished it. i’ll send you the answers. another drink? yeah love, ill drop you off. don’t worry, after 5 DUIs ya girl has practiced ;)” you can’t let her go cause lmao this girl is the girl you wanna be friends with even after college

Scorpio: the guy you want to be fwb cause lmao. 👀💦 either he’ll fall first or you will. the guy that once you’re married, everyone will be like “yeah that’s her that’s the girl that married Emotionally Unavailable Matt. he said he doesn’t want anything serious but seriously? he had to fuck me over?” they never get over him

Sagittarius: wiLd ass riDe. THE COPS ARE ALWAYS IT IN SAG’S GAME OF TAG JESUS CHRIST. this kid is probably in cross country or fuckin track and field cause they run away from the cops faster than they do from their problems and responsibilities. “why are there sirens?” “it’s probably fucking Nathan” everyone likes him lmao. he prolly has a clean record cause of his lawyers or he never gets caught ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ either way he’s always on the run man

Capricorn: living college. partying, doing work. stable job and relationship. friends and all that. procrastination to the extreme. hasn’t eaten anything but ramen this whole month. hospitalized twice cause of their sodium level. they go to class with mascara running down their face and their hair in a fucking mess or they’re wearing sweatpants and forgot to put on a t-shirt. brings vodka to class. probably puts vodka in their ramen instead of water. please help them.

Aquarius: the dealer. weed? yuh. lsd? yuh. coke? yuh. probably head of the speech and debate team. v wealth oriented. prolly dorms cause they don’t wanna go home. huge windows are their thing and don’t really like roommates.

Pisces: they’re like capricorn but they don’t have their shit together. says they’ll study later, never does. goes home just to eat something other than ramen. drinking their problems away. does their homework and is the kid who has descriptions of kids in their phone. “what’re you doing?” “texting Boy With Yellow Backpack From Psych for the study guide”. looks put together but can’t fuckin wait to get ot