#for the sake of my mental health and safety

[cent-scratchnsniff]

it was just going to be a few warmup doodles but then she infected the rest of the page like the ever eternal and spreading spores. hod!!! hod. hod :)

[blissfali]

I’ve been thinking a lot about Lexi’s stream from yesterday and I just wanted to share my thoughts:

Hearing all the lies Wilbur has told has really like. Well I knew it was bad obviously I knew he was a BAD guy, but hearing the like. Genuine “Women aren’t funny”, just really got me thinking about how much of the platform he built was a lie.

It really hurts because you think of all his songs about all these things that connected with a lot of people, but if he can put on this role of. Actually caring about women’s issues. And it all have been a complete lie, what else has he straight up put on a facade about?

I understand that there is a difference between people and internet personas, but you have to admit that the lengths he went to are beyond normal. An internet persona is usually just more put together, more energetic, etc. It’s not straight up lying about your opinions in order to please your audience. Like that’s insanely shitty and weird.

Call me parasocial for this but it genuinely makes you wonder how far he went. All of it. I don’t know how to articulate this I might be being too vague. It just makes me think if he was willing to foster this community on safety that he didn’t believe in like… why? For the fame and money? Like is it not just easier to believe those opinions instead of just PRETENDING? How do you go so far lying on being on someone’s side just to say it’s all fake 😭Like at what point is it necessary to truly convince yourself of those things.

And again I understand it’s very easy to lie on the internet about you are. I know that. But just like… the sheer SCALE of it.

He’s always came across as pretty humble on and off of stream, so to hear that he was basically doing it all for the sake of getting money and fame and not a genuine care for creation it just. That fucks you up. I haven’t put as much money into him as other people have and I’m grateful but also. I know if I had had the means to that I would’ve. Why would you manipulate people like that, y’know? It’s just. insane to me.

You play this character on an SMP about someone whose struggling with mental health and suicide, and you turn around and abuse your partner, and you lie to your entire audience, and you hurt others in your life. At what point does it just become too much effort to lie to people like that? Why put up this elaborate facade?

I think I’m going in circles now 😭I just want to know if anyone else feels like this.

[balkanradfem]

I remember back in the old days, when I first found radfems, I kept feeling it is inevitable that something will destroy them, someone will argue them down, shame them, point out that they’re doing something they’re not supposed to, and I kept reading on and on just waiting in fear, waiting for men to attack them and to humiliate them for speaking against the system.

But it didn’t happen. Instead, I found radfems arguing directly with men, over and over again, and defeating every single argument like it was nothing. Being raised in patriarchy, it was something I had never experienced before. I couldn’t understand the courage, the boldness and the dare to do it, I knew they were doing something dangerous, and I didn’t understand how was it possible that they couldn’t be shamed, couldn’t be guilt tripped, could not be humiliated or bullied into backing down.

They weren’t arguing with men for the chance they would persuade men to change their opinion, they were only showcasing for the other women, how to defeat those arguments, why are they wrong, why was it okay for a woman to fight back, to argue back.

I can remember the exact moment of reading one of those arguments, that reprogrammed my brain. I only wish I could find it again.

A woman was arguing against a man who kept saying things like ‘And how does this benefit us? Feminism is for everyone? You’re not helping anyone by being sexist and excluding men! What about the men who are abused, who are dying, traumatized, disabled? You’re uncaring and selfish **** and you should be shut down! You’re generalizing and demonizing half of the population! What about what we feel? What about our mental health? Men are victims too!’

And these arguments are something I’d heard so often I had them memorized, and reading radfem ideals, these arguments would constantly activate in my head, that we’re selfish and cruel if we don’t take care of the men in need, that compassion towards men is something we absolutely must have if we are good, normal human beings, that it’s only reasonable for men to despise us unless our movement is also proving useful to them, that they must have benefits too otherwise we’ll never get their support, never get anything done.

But the woman arguing back was having none of it. She asked right back ‘Why should you benefit out of it? Why should men get anything from a movement of women’s liberation? Do you only support women’s freedom and women’s rights if you directly benefit from it? Women are a half of a human population too, and you never once sacrificed anything to benefit us, yet you expect every single time that we sacrifice ourselves in order for you to get more benefits.

Why would I be uncaring and selfish if I don’t care about the men? You’re our primary predators, you are the number one cause of death in women, you are the reason we cannot go out safe at night, you’re the reason most if not all of our ancestors spent their lives in servitude, never getting to pursue their passions, never getting acknowledgment, money, land, legacy and matriarchal line of last names they deserved. You are shaming me like a wolf would shame a prey for running away from him, do you think a woman’s morality is to be questioned if she doesn’t feel compassion for a man who is holding a boot on her neck? Who is most likely to kill her? We have to put our safety before your feelings, for the sake of our own survival.

Why would men be what everyone and everything else must benefit? You think the rest of the world exists as resources to you, you believe we exist for you, to be used and violated and exploited by you, and you treat us accordingly, shaming us for having one place where we care about ourselves, and not you.

We have said nothing but the explicit, factual truth about the men, and if you find this demonizing, that’s on you. If mankind hasn’t oppressed and violated women’s freedom and lives for thousands of years, there would be no such facts to tell. If the truth reveals something rotten and demonic in you, that is not on us. We won’t shut up about what happened just because it makes you feel bad. Your feelings do not trump reality.

When men are victims, it’s primarily caused by other men, and in those situations, what do you expect us to do? Fight other men to save you, when we’d likely be killed? Fight for men, even though these exact victimized men are more than happy to go and victimize women, because now they have a great excuse of being victimized themselves? Men use everything, even their own victimization, against women. We do not have to feel compassion for those who have never, and will never feel it for us.’

-

It was while I was reading this, that I realized. I have been living all my life, until that moment, brainwashed to believe that I exist for men. That we all exist for men, that we’re around to make their life easier, that giving them whatever they want is mandatory, that we’re to be used. I believed my every word, action, thought, even appearance, has to be pleasing and approved by men in some way, or I would be shunned, punished, despised, and eventually, tortured and destroyed, for not being of use.

I believed that was reasonable, because men kept claiming it was, because they were arguing it loudly, with a threat of violence and humiliation for everyone who disagrees. I also believed it because I’ve never seen anything else. I’ve only ever seen women in servitude, acting like it’s natural to be so. All women in my family were servants of their husbands, almost all women in media were sexualized for men’s pleasure, almost every grown woman I’ve known was inclined to jump at male attention. Institutions, jobs, education, everything was favouring men, and we could have a try at it, but would ultimately be expected to be caretakers, or if we have a job, contribute money to men, to take off pressure from their responsibilities. We were supposed to believe they knew ‘better’ about what to do with money anyway. I’ve never dared to question it because the backlash was so hateful, violent, abusive and terrifying, I believed I would be a bad person if I thought otherwise, if I shut my compassion down.

But now, a handful of women online could argue it out without any fear of retribution because they were anonymous, they could not be touched, they could say anything, and no violence would reach them because it was anonymous platform. Men could rage at them but not touch them, never beat them. The power in that was unbelievable.

Realizing all this made me enraged, distressed, mortified, and determined to get free. From that moment on, I’ve not spend a second longer believing I exist for men. I never again considered if anything I wanted to do benefited them or not, or if anything that would benefit me would be well received with them as well. They never did this for us. They never took us into consideration when building the entire goddamn world. We do not exist for them. We are humans too. We are not selfish for not extending our patience and compassion to oppressors and predators. We are not responsible for troubles they create for themselves. And we do not have to sacrifice our rights for their convenience.

[oniraki]

Broken into fractures

Pairing : Simon "Ghost" Riley x Reader

TW : Mental health, Psych ward, mentions of : self harm, suicide wishes/attempts , severe trauma (both Simon and reader), dark themes , angst, hurt/comfort , swearing , nicotine and psychiatric medication/sedation use - maybe too much tagging but it's better safe than sorry I guess?

AN : inspired by all the fantastic artists and writers here I gathered the courage to try and write something up myself. Hope I don't mess shit up .. please have patience with me for I really don't know what I am doing right now (and English is not my first language..)

"you're in time out Mr.Riley.." his psychiatrist says in a hushed tone, making Simon's head throb painfully. He does not like that bawbag of a man with his silly round glasses and his pathetic attempts to comb his hair in a way, that would hide his growing baldness. Simon tries to focus on Doc.Hershal's words but instead his eyes are glued to a coffee stain on the man's button down.

"Mr.Riley do you even pay attention?" A grunt is the only response that so called doctor gets out of him. The man sighs. "You hurt another patient, Mr.Riley.." he tries again and Simon chuckles hoarsely. "I'm well aware of that. He had it coming for some time .." - "You broke his nose." The doctor states more urgently, observing Simon's features as far as possible, since half of his face is hidden behind a black scarf.

"Fucking hell..should've broken his neck instead." Dr.Hershal shakes his head. "We have talked about this plenty of times, didn't we, Mr.Riley? This is no healthy way of coping with your feelings. This is unacceptable behavior above all of it. Every patient has a right to be here, to heal and to be safe while doing so"

Simon could feel his blood boil, hear it rushing through his whole body. Safety? He was talking about safety after all, that happened earlier that day? "Where was her right of safety when that fucker had his hands all over her...?!" The psychiatrist nods "I have heard about the incident. But that does not justify your aggressive behavior. That was something to be dealt with by the hospitals staff, Mr.Riley."

Incident. The nurses should've handled this. "And still nobody showed up fast enough to put her out of her misery, for fucks sake!"

His heart was beating way too fast, his bruised hands shaking in his lap. Knuckles cut open from that other man's broken teeth. He felt no shame, no regret. He'd do it all over again. Do anything to keep you safe, to protect you from harm. Even if it ment that he had to be locked up here longer than he had anticipated.

He'd do it for you.

Anything..

_______

The light was nearly blinding you as you crossed the threshold of the door, leading to the cage on the hospitals rooftop. You've never been entitled to garden privileges, going out alone and wandering around the paths between old trees and decorative bushes. You couldn't be trusted, the nurses always explained with that sorry, kinda pittying smile on their faces. You'd be a danger to yourself, they'd argue. Couldn't risk you hurting yourself, fulfilling your death wish..

The cage was just a sorry excuse of a garden. An area with fake grass and plants, some benches, secured by a Chain-link fence.. but it was your only escape from the sterile and sad gray walls of the ward, crushing you between them until you couldn't breathe. Closing you in, never letting you go. The flickering of the neon lights, the squeaking of the linoleum floor. Cold,blood sucking fingers that had a hold of you. Everything designed to torture and torment you furthermore.

The only way for you to leave that place was in a body bag. That much you were sure of.

"Hey scare-bear.." you whispered as you let yourself slump down on the fake grass next to Simon. He didn't even flinch or look at you at your sudden intrusion of his space. Not even when your head was leaning against his biceps. No words or sounds left his lips as he fetched a cigarette out of the box, lighting it up on the one he was smoking and then offering it to you. You stayed in comfortable silence for a smoke or two. Simon could feel the tension leaving his body, how his shoulders relaxed more and more with every passing minute. You were here. With him. Not in the observation room with that big window, directly connected to the nurses office. Not sedated and fixated. Not alone.. never alone, as long as he could impede it.

You sneaked your arm around his, your hand engulfing his with featherlight touches. The nurses patched him up properly after his emergency session with Hershal.

"'m sorry, love." You could feel the vibration of Simon's voice. Calming and soothing as a lullaby. He still didn't look at you, instead he kept his gaze on the sundown, throwing another cigarette butt off of the roof. "nothing to be sorry for, Si. It's my fault they relieved you of all of your privileges.." you murmured kinda dejected, petting his hand ever so lovingly.

Simon huffed, shaking his head eagerly, nearly making his hood fall down. "I'd trade every fucking, meaningless privelege if that's what it takes to keep you safe. Stop acting like it was your fault. You didn't ask him to touch you.. should've killed that bastard the second he tried to get close to you the first time."

Your movements stilled for a long moment until you released a breath you didn't know you were holding.

"they all told you to stay away from me, didn't they...?" Your voice was merely anything above a whisper. Simon only grunted in response. "As if that's ever going to happen. Nothing can stop me from being near you, little gremlin."

"but what, if they're right, scare-bear?" You ask, now avoiding his gaze that lingers on your face. "What if.. I'm no good for you? Making your condition worse..?" You thought intensely about it for the last couple of weeks. Simon used to make progress, used to get better.. at least until you came along. Certainly it hast to be your fault. "Is that what they believe or what you believe?" He snapped at you, hating himself for the harshness in his voice immediately.

You heard the night nurses whisper about you and Simon. About you being a liability to him. Stopping his progress, pulling him down into your dark abyss.

Your mind began spiraling again.

"I need words, love. Talk to me.. don't shut me out. Not again.." he demanded softly, freeing his arm out of your grasp. He'd leave you, right ? Because he realized how much of a burden you were.

But instead of getting up and leaving he placed his arm around your shoulders, pulling you into him gently, as if he might break you.

But by now your thoughts and emotions were cutting too deep, pulling you into a kind of headspace where'd you go nonverbal ..

Burden. Threat. Liability. Rotten heart and soul inside a useless, broken body. Not good enough. Not loveable.

Why can't you finally die?

" 'm here, lovie. I got you." He whispered into the crown of your head. "It's okay not to be okay right now. We'll get through it, together."

Oh how you just wanted to believe him..

[confusedcunny]

All you need to know

I'm an FtM (Female to male) transman in my twenties (edit: fuck late twenties already). I have a misgendering and detransition kink but NO desire to detransition in real life, nor do I condone misgendering outside of a consensual agreement.

I like to make FtM Feminization hypnosis which you can find on discord ( https://discord.gg/Q2srVXzDbM ), feel free to copy the link and join. Everyone over the age of 18 (except actual transphobes) is welcome, however cis-guys please try not to dominate the chat (comfort and safety of the transpeople will always come first).

My favorite kinks: misgendering, detransition, bimbofication, brainwashing, edging, hypnosis, impregnation, gaslighting... Limits: T-slur, watersports, feet, poop, blood, feederism, pro-ana, continuing to keep bugging me for pics I don't want to share, actual transphobia, weight gain, calling me fat (or part of my body eg: "fat ass"), the expression "shame you got your tits cut off" or things of the sort, telling me my transition made me ugly (I was already ugly before lol), calling me a pig, limiting to who I can talk to/chat with or what I can post.

Soft limits: I'm not really into anal, although I have tried and enjoyed a small plug. I very, very rarely like to share my voice. Showing my face is reserved for people I've known for a while and trust, definitely not for people who keep bugging me about it.

Other noteworthy stuff:

I like to pretend I'm skipping T. I don't actually skip T. No, I will not mess up my hormones and health for kink.

I have lot's of body hair (like ass, chest, belly, thighs, all of it) and a full beard. I don't look like a woman and I have the privilege of passing all the time. My profile picture is when I shaved and wore a stuffed bra, I don't look like that all the time. I've been on T for over 5 years...

I've had a double mastectomy (boobies be gone).

I have vaginismus, I can insert one finger without pain. I'd like to improve this, but it's not easy. I mainly enjoy clitoral stimulation instead. Although for kink sake I love talking about being penetrated.

Believe it or not I'm aro-ace. Although I enjoy online naughties, I don't actually want to have face-to-face sex with anyone. I've never been in love and never had a crush and I'm very content with a future filled with cats.

Sometimes I take kink breaks for my mental health.

I don't always answer to dm's even if I am online. I'm autistic and sometimes I just don't want to interact.

[i-yap]

Disorders batboys s/o have( dick and jason ver)

Im a psychology student and i think everyone in this world has some symptoms if not full blown disorders. I also struggle with GAD and I have worked in 2 psychiatric hospitals so far in one I got a lot of readings+ 2 months , 8hrs on weekdays hospital shifts in 4 sectors. I don't mean to offend anyone but if you have a certain disorder it does determine a lot of your personality traits and therefore make you incompatible with certain types of people. this is just a " oh I think the batboys could take care or be compatible with someone with this disorder enough to not hamper their healing "

Anyways..(im so scared to post this)

Dick grayson- mood disorders (major depressive diroder. bipolar disorder, seasonal depression, burnout)

Dick is this silent mother hen sort of figure. he loves taking care of others, it fills him with altruistic feelings and helps him feel needed. Someone with a mood disorder needs someone they can go and be sad with without feeling judged. Dick understands that burnt out feeling really well. He understands how sometimes you just want to let your feelings go through you. He is warm sunshine personified, joyful calm and reliable. He likes taking care of you, the small quiet moments. He will find small personal ways to make your mood a little more bearable however he can without overwhelming you.

"he comes back from his crime fighting to find you in bed. he recognizes your mood instantly. slowly approaching you and gently kissing you awake .

"hey baby ", "youre back dickie" "mhm how long have you been in bed?" " I don't know" "I'm starting a bath, would you like to join me" "I don't really feel like moving" "ill carry you" ."

Jason todd- anxiety disorders ( generalized anxiety disorder(gad), phobia, panic attacks, separation anxiety disorder(sad))

gad- the fact that jason literally fights crime every night and is super impulsive/doesnt care about his safety, so seeing you almost ripping your head off from worry for him not only warms his heart ( he thinks you hate him and struggles to believe that YOU could give someone like him any attention but here you are) but also makes him take better care of himself for your sake. he hates seeing you worried but he loves calming you down. holding your hands tight, replecating meditation style breathing and mindfulness practices. kissing you overthinking head. hugging you when you stress cry, giving you massages.

Phobia- he understands triggers better than anyone else, he will be your big bad protector making sure to help you avoid the item that's causing you phobia. holding your hand and hiding you behind him if you have social anxiety, making sure to avoid triggering environments if you have agoraphobia, killing all snakes in the world if you have a phobia of them( he seriously suggests it but you stop him cuz it'll hurt the ecosystem)

Panic attacks- he has them too, either you have learned a way to deal with them and teach him or he has learned a way to deal with them and helps you . if he hasn't before meeting you, he has a new much stronger motivation to learn techniques or medication that can help deal with them for your sake and therefore also accelerate his healing

seperation anxiety-.. he has it too so like.( ik its more common in kids but adult sad is also a thing) both of you are clingy, its a win win for you two , fuck the rest of the world

again this is just my opinion okay? don't make mental health a taboo , if this post was about batboys x blind! y/n no one would have an issue. mental health is a condition and sometimes its out of our control, it depends on so many factors. Its nothing to be ashamed or scared of.

[pokemonshelterstories]

hello!

I’m thinking of starting a therapy place/shelter, mainly for queer youth, and I was wondering how to help possibly accustom my Pokémon to use as therapy mon? I raised most of them up from youth, and they’re quite friendly, but have been mostly used in battling (which is where I got the money for this) and I’m worried they might react adversely to other trainers and their companions. The main three I’d be using for this would be my Luxray Nimbus, who was the first I ever caught, and my Leafeon and Sylveon (shiny), Morel and Rory.

sorry for the long ask hehe

unfortunately, i think you'd have a really hard time doing this with your former battling pokemon. for liability's sake it's highly recommended that you certify therapy pokemon with an agency. and, for better or for worse, most of these agencies will not certify pokemon who are battle-trained. the general thinking is that a pokemon that has frequently battled, regardless of how friendly it is, is more likely to respond with aggression in unfamiliar situations. if one of your pokemon were to harm a client, you could be faced with charges.

there are, of course, some organizations that disagree with this line of thinking and will happily certify any pokemon that passes its tests; you'd have to look around to see if any such organization exists in your region. of all of those pokemon, your luxray would probably be the toughest to certify due to both general species temperament and typing. still, if you're concerned at all about the way any of them would react to clients, i personally think it's better to err on the side of caution and not use them as therapy pokemon without undergoing a full behavioral training course and assessment.

make sure that you also look into laws and recommendations surrounding accessibility and pokemon-free spaces. as a private establishment, you'd likely have control over whether or not you allow clients to have pokemon in your facilities. but many health providers and shelters do require clients' pokemon to be balled or boxed while they're inside to prevent things like unexpected battles. there's a lot of debate about whether allowing client pokemon in homeless shelters is a safety concern versus whether the mental/emotional effect of requiring vulnerable people to set their pokemon aside is demeaning/damaging. that's a choice you'll have to make for yourself, but i do think it's an important consideration.

[bekolxeram]

I had an idea of Buck finding out who Maurice was through Athena months ago. No one gave me that fic, I guess I'd better feed myself. I've never written any fic before, (You read that right, I don't mean for this fandom, I've never written any fic in my life) so I was planning for a short little humorous piece. Well, I'm around 2/3 of the way done, and it's already over 2.5k words long. I don't think I'll able to finish it in the very near future, and I still don't have an AO3 account, so I decide to share the first half of it with you? To give myself the motivation to keep writing?

I just want to get my ideas out there, I'll probably correct the grammar and refine the word choices when I finish the whole thing. Please enjoy and give me feedback. (Gently, it's my first time writing anything fictional outside of high school English exam)

The first time Buck heard the name Maurice, was at Chimney and Maddie’s hospital wedding.

Neither his sister nor his now brother-in-law had much luck in love. Murderous ex, surprise pregnancy, all sorts of trauma, mental health struggle, break up, make up, you name it, they had been through it all. Even on their wedding day, the universe decided to sprinkle in a little viral encephalitis as a last minute wedding gift. Any other couple would have taken all this as a sign of destiny’s disapproval of their relationship, but not Chimney and Maddie. Life kept trying to set them apart, but they chose to get back together, time and time again. Even when they were deep in delirium, when they had lost all sense of self, they always instinctively crawled back to one another, like it was in their very nature to love each other.

Buck agreed with his mother, getting married at a hospital was indeed appropriate. Plenty of newlyweds said their vows just for the sake of traditions, but when Maddie and Chimney pledged to their lives to each other, in sickness and in health, they had their entire relationship to back it up.

Buck was ecstatic, when Bobby pronounced them officially married. He envisioned how the day would be panning out quite differently, but he could not complain. Sure, he would prefer to have his date by his side, but as a firefighter himself, he understood the safety of the city was more important than his own feelings. If anything, on that day, he learned that life would not always let you have your dream wedding, or your dream date, but as long as you treasure and prioritize each other, everything would work out in the end.

Then Tommy walked into the hospital, still in his turnout gear, covered in soot, all apologetic.

Buck just knew he had to close their distance, taste the alluring flavor of smoke straight from his lips.

Tommy came, without stopping by to get changed or to wash up, because the wedding was important to Buck, because he promised to come. Buck once thought duty and romance was a question of either/or, but Tommy made enough of an effort to make them both work.

Buck knew very well how dirty his face must have been after making out aggressively with his date, but he did not care one bit. He had not been this happy for so long, he wanted everyone in the room to see how elated he was. He wanted to wear his happiness on his face.

He briefly congratulated the newlyweds. His sister, like the caretaker she was, pulled out a baby wipe for him to clean up his lower face. He tried his best to wipe off all the soot, then he took a piece a cake and started looking around the room for his date. He found Tommy having a conversation with the Wilsons.

“Hey,” Buck put his hand on Tommy’s lower back, “What are you guys talking about?”

“Just what an entrance you two have made,” Hen said with a smirk. Karen was struggling to hide her chuckle.

“Look at him, can you blame me?” Buck gazed adoringly at Tommy, “I was planning to show him off on the dancefloor anyway.”

“You’re full of surprise, Evan, you know that?” Tommy smiled, the ocean blue in his eyes filled Buck’s heart with affection.

“I’m sure it went a lot better than the last time you tried kissing someone in front of me,” Hen interrupted, with a devilish grin.

“Huh?” Tommy reacted, puzzled.

“Maurice.” The Wilsons were fully giggling at this point.

“Oh no.” Tommy covered half of his face with one of his hands, seemingly embarrassed by Hen’s teasing, “You guys are never going to let me live this down, aren’t you?”

The conversation kept flowing, but Buck was deafened by the thousands of questions in his head.

Who’s Maurice? Why have I never heard of him? Why was Tommy trying to kiss him? In front of Hen too? Was he Tommy’s crush? Who rejected him? No, were they… together?

“Evan?” Tommy noticed Buck’s lapse in focus.

“Uh… yes… yes, Tommy?”

“The cake?” Tommy pointed at the piece of dessert in Buck’s hand.

“Sure… Of course.” Buck handed the plate over. He really wanted to find out more about this Maurice, but at the same time, he recognized the recency of his budding romance with Tommy. Tommy would get around to mentioning this mysterious figure from his past eventually, Buck thought, so he decided to let it go for now.

“Sorry, I haven’t eaten since last night. I’m starving.” Tommy explained, while shoving a sizable chunk of wedding cake into his mouth. “Mmm, this is so good. This is everything I’ve been waiting for.” This man loved his cake, even the soot and fatigue on his face could not hide the genuine joy radiating from his face, in all its crinkly, wrinkly glory.

“The cake huh? Is that all?” Buck asked, flirtatiously.

Tommy flirted back, with his signature deadpan expression but burning lust in his eyes, “Well, I have to refuel my body before engaging in whatever activities await us tonight.”

Buck’s heart skipped a beat, probably from the sudden rush of blood down south. Yeah, Maurice could wait.

The second time Buck heard the name Maurice, was at the medal ceremony.

It was supposed to be a joyous occasion.

Not only did none of them get fired, they were all given medals for borrowing LAFD property and leading a pre-authorized rescue mission off the coast of Mexico. None of that would have been possible without the pilot. Yes, all of them played their part in saving Bobby and Athena from the sinking cruise ship, but Tommy in particular put his career, even his own life at risk just to help a few old colleagues he had not seen for years, just because there might be people in need. Judge him all you want, but seeing Tommy on that stage, being awarded for his skills and heroism, Buck simply could not conceal the fondness and enamorment written all over his face. Bobby and Athena being alive and well, looking like a classic Hollywood power couple, was obviously the most important part, Buck told himself. Although, Tommy being appreciated for the absolute ace he was, while in his dress blue, came as a close second.

The way the rigid fabric splayed across the pilot’s strong muscular body, buttons holding on for dear life against his bulging pecs, pants just tight enough to accentuate the curvature of his glutes, a feature Buck found enticing in all genders. Buck was not alone in ogling the real life erotic fantasy in front of him, about that he was sure, but he took comfort in knowing he was the only one there who got to touch this body, to worship it, to savor every inch of it, to feel it against his own. He might have almost missed his own call to the stage because he was too busy gawking at his boyfriend.

He was looking forward to celebrate this moment with his loved ones, maybe a little foreplay in costume with Tommy too, until Gerrard showed up and ruined everything.

Upon spotting the former 118 captain, Tommy looked as if he had seen a ghost.

The second Gerrard made a limp wrist gesture at Tommy, insinuating a homophobic slur, Buck realized he was more than an ignorant old man. He barely skirted the edge of blatant bigotry just to abuse his targets while staying on the side of possible deniability. If he used merely 10% of his brain power allocated for creative insults, Los Angeles would be a much safer place.

Tommy was clearly upset after their unexpected encounter with Gerrard. He was forking the food on his plate, without eating any, then abruptly, he stood up, “I don’t feel like eating these right now. I’m gonna get some cake, I’ll be back in a minute.”

Buck gave him a forced smile and a small peck to his temple, then he sent his boyfriend to his beloved sweet treat.

“I’m worried about him,” Buck turned to Chimney, “I’ve never seen him like this before, being so… small.”

“Working under Gerrard was not exactly a fun time worth keeping in your memory” Chimney sighed. “Like most of us, it took Tommy a long time and a lot of soul searching to become who he is right now. He did have a fat head back in the days, but I can’t say I blame the guy. Sometimes you do things you’ll regret further down the road just to survive at the moment.”

“Yeah… he told me the 118 was a regressive place back then.”

“Gerrard isn’t just another asshole, he’s an asshole with power, particularly power over his people’s safety. Tommy almost died because of him.”

“I know… Gas explosion, right? He said you saved his life.”

“I guess I did, but hey, Gerrard only gave me one month of KP duty as a reward, so that was a plus,” Chimney snickered, sarcastically.

“He punished you for saving Tommy’s life?” Buck never fully grasped the injustice, mistreatment, and suffering his loved ones faced under Gerrard’s reign of terror. He made a mental note to thank Bobby later for his gentle fatherly guidance.

“That’s who he is, Buck. All power trip, no leadership. I’ve never seen Tommy so scared of somebody,” Chimney continues, “except maybe... Maurice.”

Maurice, this name again. Buck still knew close to nothing about this cryptic individual.

Tommy was very upfront about how abrasive his was in his youth. Having to desperately hide his true self from his abusive father, then intolerant military policy, and finally his homophobic superior, he had learned very early on that the best defense was a solid offense. He was cold, distant, downright rude to anyone and everyone who tried getting too close, to the truth, to his desire, to his heart. So if Tommy was reluctant to share the parts of his life that he was less than proud of, Buck would not try to pry… At least until Chimney told him how fearful Tommy was of Maurice.

“Who…” Just as Buck opened his mouth, his brother in law rose from his seat, grabbing the red wine filled glass with him. “If you’ll excuse me, I have to take this wine to my wife.”

As soon as Chimney left, Tommy returned with a piece of cake in his hand and a subtle smile on his face.

“Heyy-” Tommy greeted Buck in his usual playful tone.

“Hey, feeling better?” Buck was relieved, sensing Tommy’s change of mood.

“Um…” Tommy looked down, seemingly pondering. Then he retook the seat he previously occupied, the one right next to Buck, and hooked one of his feet under his boyfriend’s chair. He gave the chair a swift, firm tug, and in the blink of an eye, the physical distance between them vanished.

“Now I am,” Tommy murmured with his deep, gravelly voice.

Just like that, the rest of the room ceased to exist for Buck. No Gerrard, no Maurice, only Tommy. Buck’s fingers slowly slid towards the strong, burly thigh leaning against his own, but Tommy stopped him on his track, by grabbing his inquisitive hand.

“This is not exactly... appropriate for work, don’t you think?”, Tommy said, without letting go of Buck. “People may have questions if they see us.” His grip tightened, just enough to reignite the fervent desire building up between them since the start of the day. “Hen and Karen asked me just now about my intentions with you, if they are…” He looked down at the shinny medal currently decorating his boyfriend’s chest, and used his free hand to adjust the ribbon, “honorable.”

“And what did you say?” Buck asked breathlessly, almost panting.

“I told them, we’re taking it very slow…” Tommy inched closer and closer. “You’re taking the lead, I’m just trying to keep up…” His lips ghosted over Buck’s cheek, then he whispered into his ear, “Where should we go now?”

Buck responded by simply dragging Tommy onto the station rooftop. With the “no visitors” sign blocking the stairs, it was the perfect place for some private pastime.

[shxtodxroki]

𝚆𝚊𝚛𝚖𝚝𝚑

Summary: It’s been just about a day since Izuku’s return to U.A. after exiling himself for the sake of you and the rest of your classmates, and you’re determined to help him warm up and feel safe once more with a cup of hot cocoa and some cozy cuddles.

Flufftober Day 7 Alternate Prompt: Hot Chocolate

Warnings: Mental health struggles in line with Izuku’s mental state during the vigilante arc

Pairing: Izuku Midoriya x Gender Neutral! Reader

Word Count: 1.4k

Check out my full Flufftober masterlist here!

He’s doing better now. Or at least, he looks to be doing better, in comparison to the frail, exhausted, beaten down boy you had dragged through the doors of the U.A. dorm just 24 hours ago, seeming so lonely as he clung on to your warm frame oozing with worry despite his insistence that he shouldn’t drag you down with his presence. You had barely left his side since the moment he returned to the dorms, struggling to let go of him even long enough to bathe himself though he desperately needed it now that you finally had him back.

He had spent most of the day resting, catching up on the sleep he had clearly been deprived of while out on his own. You were working with your classmates to keep him well-fed throughout the day, seeing how frail and worn out he looked after his brief life of solitude. All Might even made a point to bring food for the boy, his guilt shining through as he blamed himself for your boyfriend’s initial departure and the burden weighing him down. It had been a combined effort to get Izuku to where he was now, snuggling into your side with a blanket over his frame while you hold him close and run your fingers through his fluffy hair as he finally seemed somewhat content to be back in the dorms. 

“How are you feeling, ‘Zuku? Do you need anything?” You ask for what feels like the millionth time since the previous night, your hands gliding smoothly through his forest locks since you had long ago worked out any tangles. His wide, beautiful eyes look up at you as he hears your voice, his voice soft and gentle as he responds.

“Mmm…. I’m still a little cold…” He mumbles quietly, not meeting your eyes out of guilt. He feels bad putting so much on you, feels bad that he left you to worry about him while he was out on his own, and most of all, feels bad that just being with him puts you in even more danger than you would have been in otherwise as a U.A. student and future hero. Your brow furrows, not out of annoyance but rather concern, at his response. You had hoped your body heat and the thick blanket would be enough to warm him with time, but it seems that the cold from the outside him had managed to chill him to the very bone during his time away in a way that wasn't easily remedied, marking him with these lonely and bitter chills.

Luckily for both of you, you believe you just may have the perfect cure for his shivers and iciness.

“...I think I have something that can help you, baby. Can you stay here for a second? I want you to keep yourself bundled up as much as possible, and I’ll be right back.” You look at him with a soft, loving gaze as you speak, your hand moving to cup his cheek as your thumb gently brushes against his rough skin. Safety and security are what he needs right now, and you’ll be damned if you can’t give him that, at the very least. You’re gentle with him, maybe gentler than he needs, but you can’t stand anything else but the softest touches to his broken down frame right now as you carefully make your way out from his hold while still leaving him cozily wrapped up in a pile of blankets.

“Alright…” He practically whispers, seeming so unsure and dull, so unlike the bright, eager Izuku you used to know. This fight, the impending war against the villains who have been looming over the school and the world for so long, seems to have sucked out his joy like a leech. You need to find a way to bring it back, to return to him even an ounce of his happiness from before. You just have to. You can’t stand seeing him like this.

You don’t clue him in to what you’re thinking, however. You don’t want him to worry about you right now, not even a bit. So you simply offer him a soft smile as you make your way to the kitchen in the dorms, pulling out two mugs as well as two small plates as you temporarily exile those concerns from your mind. Even if you can’t do much, you can at least do something small for your boyfriend. He deserves it, he deserves the world right now and you would give anything to bring it to him.

You know the kettle takes around 10 minutes to boil, so you quickly turn that on as you set two packets of hot cocoa mix aside for the moment. The bag of marshmallows in the communal pantry is thankfully fresh, not yet fallen victim to Denki’s persistent habit of leaving them half-open until they go stale, and you set two large marshmallows onto the small plates on the counter before closing up the bag and returning it into the pantry.

The marshmallows spin and inflate in the microwave for a few seconds, growing puffy and gooey and perfect for s’mores before you swiftly pull them out once they've cooked enough to finish assembly. Sandwiched between a graham cracker on either side with a layer of chocolate in between, within five minutes you’re staring at two delectable sweet treats for you to share with your boyfriend, setting them aside as you turn to the kettle to see if it’s heated up yet.

It is, you realize as you see steam brewing and flowing from the lid, though you nearly jump out of your skin before you even get a chance to pour the water into the mugs. Two rough, calloused arms encircle your waist from behind as hands work their way beneath your shirt to gently brush your stomach, and after a moment the realization dawns on you that Izuku’s come to see you in the kitchen despite you asking him to stay on the couch.

“I missed you.” He mumbles pitifully, burying himself into the thin fabric of your shirt as he pulls you into his hold. Your heart melts at the touch, knowing he means more than just today with those words, and tears spring to your eyes at the thought that he felt so lonely and needy after so many days out on his own. You refuse to let them fall, though, as you turn to face him and hug him in return, still so relieved to have him back in your arms again after so much time apart. "I always miss you."

“I always miss you, too. You can stay here with me if you want, baby. I’m almost done anyways.” You whisper with a voice brimming with love, your heart cracking and mending itself back together all at once as you press a tender kiss to his forehead and cradle him in your arms. “I made s’mores, I know you love them.” 

His eyes seem to brighten a bit at the sight of the treat on the counter, subconsciously leaning more of his weight into you as you carefully pour a sufficient amount of hot cocoa mix into each of the mugs in front of you with the chocolatey scent wafting into the air. You quickly follow up with the kettle of hot water, filling the mugs nearly to the top before adding a splash of milk into each just the way you know he likes. No words are exchanged between the two of you for a moment, just a simple hum of contentment from your boyfriend’s lips as he watches you pull out a packet of mini-marshmallows and let him relax and melt into you. You load both cups up to the very brim, adding extra marshmallows into his cup for good measure as your free hand brushes against his where it rests on your stomach.

“....Sorry I didn’t stay on the couch like you told me to.” He whispers into your ear, the feeling sending shivers cascading down your spine as you wipe down the counter and move to put everything away with Izuku trailing behind you.

“Don’t apologize, you know I’m always happy to be around you.” You chide gently, now lacing your fingers through his and squeezing his hand lightly. You’re delicate as you pry his hands from the hold he has around your torso, placing his mug in one and his s’more in the other as you grab yours as well. And finally, finally after days of worry and stress and pain, a small smile blooms on his face as he makes his way back over to the couch with you right by his side, at peace for a brief moment following so many months of unease. You’re careful to bundle the two of you up tight in your mountain of blankets as you cuddle up closely to one another, your mugs in your hands as you swipe a puff of marshmallow off of Izuku’s face with a giggle. He nuzzles gratefully into your hand in response, and that night Izuku falls asleep warm, cozy, and most of all, loved, tucked into your side with a belly full of hot cocoa and s’mores and a heart full or warmth.

Request - Anonymous said: Izuku for flufftober, he’s the fluffiest of the fandom

A/N: Sorry this is so late, the past few days have been super busy and I didn’t have time to write when I thought I would! I literally pulled an all-nighter and didn’t sleep until like 8AM yesterday trying to get some classwork done, but once I finally slept I had some time to write! I’m gonna try and catch up on the Flufftober days I missed super quickly, but I still had fun writing this and think it turned out super cute so I hope you guys enjoy it as well! :D Also my requests are open right now, so if you have any requests please feel free to send them my way! :]

Taglist: @flufftober @pasteldaze @papijean @deadmans-toe @trashy-bowtie @palenightmarepersona @eunoiasa @lady-juliette @swiftbyul @tsukkisukkii @shotos-angelic-whore

If you’d like to be added to any of my taglists, you can fill out this form here! Thank you for your support <3

[cosmicjoke]

Yashiro never owed it to Doumeki to Stay

I know I'm probably gonna' draw the ire of a lot of people by making this post, but fuck it. I'm too exhausted at some of the same, ridiculous rhetoric I see in this fandom, over and over, again and again, and I think it needs to be addressed.

A big part of my problem with the way people talk about what happened between Yashiro and Doumeki pre-time skip, and in particular, the harsh criticism I see lobbed at Yashiro specifically for what happened is that, underlying it, is this presumption that Yashiro ever owed Doumeki anything. The way Yashiro's rejection of Doumeki so often gets framed makes it seem as if Yashiro somehow owed himself to Doumeki, body and soul, and how dare he push Doumeki away. How dare he refuse his advances. As if Yashiro was some sort of possession that Doumeki alone had a claim to.

Because, see, no, Yashiro isn't an object to be attained. He isn't, to quote Jasmine from "Aladdin", a prize to be won. He's a human being, and his previous relationship with Doumeki was that of employer and employee. Yashiro never promised himself to Doumeki. He never made any sort of vow of faithfulness or assurances to him that he alone would be his only partner. He never even hinted at or implied that he wanted to be with Doumeki in any sort of romantic capacity.

And yet, we see so many people raging against Yashiro for rejecting Doumeki's advances, straight up accusing Yashiro of causing Doumeki "trauma" by pushing him away, as if Yashiro was somehow obligated to accept and receive those advances for the sake of Doumeki's own, mental health.

What the hell is Yashiro to these people, I wonder. Do they view him as the catalyst for Doumeki's journey toward mental health? Is he meant only to serve Doumeki in his journey toward self-discovery and self-affirmation?

The reasons for why Yashiro pushed Doumeki away rarely, if ever, get discussed. All we hear about is how Yashiro hurt Doumeki, and how he's now supposed to make it up to him by being magically cured of all his own mental illnesses and embrace Doumeki's sudden reappearance in his life with open arms, confessing his unwavering love and faithfulness to Doumeki alone.

Again, no. Yashiro never owed anything to Doumeki. He didn't owe him a relationship. He didn't owe him his faithfulness. He didn't owe him an acceptance of his advances.

Yashiro pushed Doumeki away because he was trying to protect both of them. He resorted to more and more extreme tactics as the story went on because Doumeki wouldn't stop pursuing him. Doumeki wouldn't take no for an answer, and that made Yashiro more and more desperate. That doesn't make the way Yashiro treated Doumeki right, but it also is important to understanding why Yashiro acted as he did. It wasn't out of malice. It wasn't out of an intent to harm Doumeki. It was out of fear for Doumeki's safety and out of an attempt to protect himself. Yashrio felt threatened by Doumeki's pursuit of him. Not physically, but from an emotional and mental standpoint. Doumeki's presence in his life at that particular time, and his particular way of treating Yashiro, caused Yashiro immense mental and emotional anguish and also undermined his very sense of self-identity. It was devastating to him. He told Doumeki no, and Doumeki didn't listen.

I don't think people want to acknowledge this reality, or take into account that it was wrong of Doumeki to keep pursuing Yashiro when Yashiro told him he didn't want him to. He had no claim on Yashiro. He had no right to intrude on his life without being invited in. Yashiro didn't owe himself to Doumeki in any way, even as a means of healing Doumeki's negative self-image.

And so you see, the way it still gets talked about post-time skip, as if Doumeki's cold-facade is entirely Yashiro's fault and, thus, the onus is on Yashiro to assuage Doumeki's fears of him running away again by confessing his feelings, continues to make the presumption that Yashiro ever owed it to Doumeki to stay in the first place.

He didn't.

I understand Doumeki's fear. I understand why he continues to act indifferent to Yashiro. I understand he's attempting to prevent Yashiro from running away again because he wants to be in a relationship with him. The problem with all of this is, Yashiro staying or leaving is entirely up to Yashiro himself. It's his body, and his life, and whether he wants to stay with Doumeki or not isn't up to Doumeki at all. And so Doumeki attempting to manipulate him into staying isn't the right way to approach the situation. It isn't right to try and trick Yashiro into staying with him.

Obviously, Yashiro wants to be with Doumeki. Obviously he's in love with him. But what I think a lot of people don't want to accept, or admit is that, ultimately, the choice needs to be Yashiro's alone, without any sort of manipulative tactic from Doumeki calculated to keep Yashiro at his side. Yashiro staying at Doumeki's side needs to be consensual on Yashiro's part, and right now, it's not. Right now, Doumeki is lying to Yashiro to keep him frozen in place, because Doumeki wants it. Because Doumeki wants Yashiro. Doumeki is going to have to come to understand, at some point, that the choice isn't his to make. It's Yashiro's.

I think, if he does realize that, and accepts it, that Yashiro should be the one who gets to decide whether he stays or leaves, he can then let go of his fear of Yashiro running away. And if he can let that fear go, then he can start being honest with Yashiro again. And I think Doumeki will be pleasantly surprised at the results if he does. Because Yashiro very obviously DOES want to stay with him. But he needs to be allowed by Doumeki to choose that for himself.

[suzyandthefox]

Clarification, Apologies,A word for the community, and Blog Updates..

On 31st of July, around a week ago, A situation involving some users, myself included, happened, causing me to go on a temporary hiatus for a week, as it was handled indelicately and caused a lot of harm to users who never asked to be a part of it.

For the sake of privacy and not stirring the pot again, I will not name any of the users.

I should clarify that English is not my first language, so there might be grammatical mistakes in this.

TLDR: I was careless and I reblogged from NSFW blogs not knowing they were NSFW blogs, causing harassment to other members of the community. I have deleted these reblogs and I decided to not reblog anything on this blog for the safety of everyone.

Elaboration under break:

It started when an user, who I will not name, made a callout post about me. They screenshotted reblogs I made, and while I still believe that that user fully intended to cause drama instead of addressing any real issue, they were right in calling my mistakes out.

Throughout several months, I have reblogged from NSFW accs, even though I have a bold NSFW DNI on the top of my blog. I have also reblogged from an MDNI account multiple times despite having minors on my blog, endangering both parties.

I have since blocked these accounts and deleted these reblogs. However,that doesn't undo the damage I already did.

I know I have problems with many social skills, like social cues and etiquette. I do have Autism and ADHD after all. This led to, when I was reblogging things that I found cool, me accidentally missing many of the signs that most would have seen. I didn't realize what was happening until someone told me.

At the moment of the discourse, this blog had 194 followers (202 as I write this). In any other social media platform, this number means you're basically invisible, and so that's the logic I went with. I thought nobody saw this blog so I was lenient with my content, treating this blog as my personal shitposting place.

However, after this discourse,I realized that I am being seen on Tumblr. That unfortunately was at the cost of accidentally hurting innocent users who never asked to be a part of this, along with ruining my mental health for a while.

There have been kind hearted users who defended me, and users who told me that I am being looked up to and that I am a well respected member of the community, which is something I will remember for the rest of my life.

What I am trying to say is, I fucked up. Badly. Yet despite that, the community has given me a second chance, proven by the fact that I wasn't blocked or unfollowed (Quite the opposite actually)

I now understand the responsibility that I have and that I need to be very careful with what I post, especially since I have made the choice to let minors interact with this blog. I now understand I must look after them because of that.

I apologize so much for everyone that has been hurt by this. I won't ask for forgiveness. I only ask that everyone knows that I have acknowledged my mistakes and I promise to better myself in the future.

I am a human and I make mistakes, please don't ever be afraid to tell me when I do something wrong. (Tell me, by messaging or commenting. Please not by making a call out post on me, since this has proven to hurt more than help others.)

I made this blog to be a safe place to enjoy a certain trope without getting hurt, and I want to live up to that. For the safety of everyone, me included, I will make some changes to this blog.

Changes:

1: No more reblogs

This blog was handled indelicately, and unprofessionally, and I decided that I will change that, I will make this blog into an Art/Writing blog first and foremost, With prompt posts being a second priority.

The only exception to this will be fanworks or fanfics or things that are directly made for me/things I am mentioned in, I will tag them accordingly depending on content.

2: This blog is now +16

Yes, I interacted with users younger than 16 before, Yes,I have followers who are less than 16. I have thought about it deeply and I realized that for the sake of not hurting anyone, and if I wanted to be more comfortable around this blog, then I need to keep people who are slightly closer to my age range, Instead of censoring myself,

that's because I have taken a liking to (Nonsexual) fatal vore and gore, I want to make similar content in the future, as well as other darker topics.

I will not block anyone who is younger than 16, but I will not directly interact with you anymore, even if I'm not responsible for your actions, it's just to be safe.

Now I need to make some things clear:

I am not a minor so I can interact with MDNI blogs and they can interact if they wish to. As long as they're SFW

But, again, I will not reblog from them for the safety of those who are minors following my blog.

Vore is nonsexual for me and I don't want my work to be sexualised, especially because I depict myself in it.

I have absolutely nothing against people who are into it sexually, I just don't want my work in these circles.

I can't control how my work is perceived and where it goes, however my blog is SFW (In the sense that there's nothing graphic or sexual on it), meant for people who are also interested in that content, and so I don't want to see people who think it's “hot�� here.

I am not responsible for anyone's actions on this blog, I am not responsible for people who find my content weird or sexual or whatever,I am not responsible for the minors on this blog, I am not responsible for my mutuals, I am only responsible for my own actions.

This community has been extremely supportive of me, and there have been people who comforted me during this whole situation, without them I probably would've deleted my blog from sheer panic.

I owe these people my life, thank you so much for being on my side.

I hope that one day, my blog can be a source of comfort too.

Thank you for reading and I hope you guys have a wonderful day!

[yansimstorythatiwillnotworkon]

Hanako Yamada

Name: Hanako Yamada

Gender: Female

Class: 1-2

Club: N/A

Persona: Lovestruck (Social Butterfly)

Reputation:

Overall: +10

Liked: +60

Respected: 0

Feared: -30

Crush: Hazu Kashibuchi

Strength: Carries Pepper Spray

__

Hanako will NOT be portrayed as some sexualized minor with a brother complex in my story, and I like to think that that's because I'm a decent human being. Hanako was specifically very fun to draw because I like drawing happy characters and she's adorable.

But back to the important stuff. Hanako joins Akedemi to watch over her brother and make sure that his mental health doesn't absolutely deteriorate by trying to stop any incident that comes his way. I imagine that on the first day, she's nearly impossible to kill because Taro will be showing her around the school. On other days, she's constantly switching between socializing and checking on her brother, which might make her elimination difficult due to always being around people.

I'd like to think of a super hard task for her so it's worth it when you ask her to follow you or tell her to go away- if she even does, she may want to stay in Taro's general area. I don't think she'll leave if you threaten her because she'll just cry about it and go tell Taro, which might just be a general game over. More beneath the cut.

Some assume that Hazu was meant to be Mida's suitor (which is a horrible thought because he'd be way too anxious to say that he wouldn't want something like that), but I think that it's Toga simply because he's in her class. I'd rather Hazu be with Hanako, and I think that'd be beneficial for him because she's an extrovert and could teach him how to avoid negative social interactions more. As I stated above, Hanako will actively seek out his company, likely because she has a crush on him. I think it'd be interesting if we could get closer to a rival by treating her like the suitor and giving her the tips for winning over her crush.

Hanako may be labeled as an "unkillable rival" simply because of the toll it will take on Taro if she ever dies. Losing a childhood friend is one thing, and considering how much trauma he faces beforehand, losing his sister could break everything. If dangerous things happened before hand and Taro still ignored Hanako's worries, only for Hanako to get killed in the same environment that he's been in the whole time (and her ONLY being there for his wellbeing and safety), I think we could possibly have some sort of alternate nemesis on his hands. On a less depressing note, I think that Hanako will be clingy only when she's anxious. If she sees some blood on the floor, she'll run to Taro and tell him about it. Depending on the general atmosphere, he may decide to tell a teacher or leave the school, of course, with Hanako on his arm. If anything, seeing anything suspicious from a dangerous weapon to psychotic laughing could disturb Hanako's whole routine and cause her to stick by Taro for the rest of the day.

Another idea I had was having Hanako subtly follow people she finds suspicious, but only after seeing them do something strange. I don't mean for this to contradict my earlier statement. My goal is to make her follow Ayano. Only from a distance and only after she does something strange, like giggle for someone else's attention or tell someone to follow her or go away. Hanako might watch from a distance, but open doors that Ayano closes for the sake of being able to see. If she feels like she's being too weird, she might try to start a conversation with Ayano and question her. I think it's worth noting that anything that Hanako sees Ayano or someone else do, she'll refer to them to Taro by name. If the student or Ayano have a good reputation, it's unlikely that he'll believe that they mean any harm. Something else that could force Ayano to be peaceful in Hanako's week is to make it so if anyone dies or goes missing while she's present in the school, she'll force Taro to drop out for both of their safety. Unless you distract Hanako's anxieties with a love interest in Megami's week, she might do the same then, too. Maybe if Ayano befriends Hanako, Hanako will trust her enough to want Ayano to be around and possibly even protect him. But that would likely be adding some new complex function to the game. Lord knows the coding can't handle that. (🙄)

[sunanthrope]

My name is Ahmed Bakr, a Palestinian. I live in the Gaza Strip. My least wish is to save my wife and children (Neven, Khaled, Joan, Aida, and Musk) from certain death. I write these words and ask for your help. I do not know whether we will be able to survive. This is my last message to you as a human being and the story of my life and my family since the beginning of the war. My son (Khaled) is his age. (8) years old and suffers from enlarged liver diseases, infections, and anemia from contaminated food and water. We are unable to treat him, buy medicine for him, hold a baby no more than two months old, and I am unable to provide her with milk, pampers, or even supplies for small children. My children need food and treatment. We are deprived of the food we love. Our mental health is deteriorating and very destructive, and we need hygiene supplies in the tents. I was displaced from my home from the north to the south, to Khan Yunis, then to Rafah, and then to Nuseirat. I was injured by an occupation sniper while searching for a living for my children. I endured carrying water, searching for wood to light the fire, and bringing food for my children because there was no gas for long distances. Long, all day long, surrounded by devastation, bloody missiles and shattering shrapnel. We endured constant fear day and night for a whole year without any peace or comfort. I do not know where to take my children. Our lives are very painful and difficult, and every time we miraculously escape death, I want to help everyone who can help us, those with compassionate hearts. We live in the heat of tents and under the blazing sun. My house was completely demolished after years of effort and fatigue and building our house. Then, one night and one day, everything disappeared and my children’s room was completely burned and demolished. Even our car was not spared from the bombing, as we had all the wonderful means and tools. For the sake of a decent life, we started roasting our food over the fire despite the fatigue and heat. We are still standing despite the bombing, hunger, and severe shortages. We need your help. At this Save My Children event, we invite you to share our story with your friends and families with clarity and support. Your sensible words and prayers provide strength to endure these difficult circumstances... (Your donation) can make enough difference in our lives. We depend on your support and your standing by our side through this traditional ordeal, boxing, to restore hope and safety to Hayat and her family. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for considering my application. Your support and donation are very important to me and my family

Show your support for this GoFundMe

.

[young-royals-confessions]

funnily enough, season 3 changed how i view and write the royal family. and i mean every single member lmao

erik was not as perfect or as kind as a lot of us hoped for as and wille believed. he could be cruel and was likely just as unhappy as wille was as crown prince. he was just more willing and skilled at hiding it. this kind of creates an interesting view into how their sibling dynamic was so different from their actual selves. or at least it was for erik. in my mind, erik grew up knowing he was going to take over the throne and therefore felt like he kind of had to split himself off into different personas-showing a different part of who he really was to certain people so that everyone could stay in his corner (like a good king would i guess). so much so that no one, not even his parents or wille or august, can ever get a true grasp on who erik was.

wille didn’t grow up like that. he grew up very similarly, but he didn’t have the expectation of ruling an entire country. he was more of a “what if” and “just to be safe” option. he was an afterthought, and rather than split his personality into different pieces of himself, he instead became more of a recluse who yearns for love but never receives it in the way he needs. so he is only ever fully himself when he’s around people who can reciprocate his yearning for kindness and care. the people who he feels safe with. erik was that for him even though erik, unbeknownst to him, wasn’t who he really thought. and simon eventually became that safety net as well. but by that time he had become crown prince. and to be the crown prince, he was gonna have to adapt like erik had. and wille was never good at pretending for the sake of others, so the crown prince persona ended up intruding onto the real wille until simon could no longer recognize him.

kristina is neglectful and ludvig is a silent passenger in it all. these are things i already knew but i feel like season 3 gave me so much more to work with in terms of their family dynamic. wille loves them both and was going crazy with guilt at the thought of kristina’s mental health deteriorating because of him. wille blames himself a lot, which makes me believe that the two of them had no problem doing that before. blaming wille for scandals or tiny mistakes he made. so much so that wille ended up convincing himself that everything that goes wrong is somehow his fault. just bad bad parents. do i think they love wille? yea im sure they do, but the crown clearly comes first for them and wille honestly deserves so much better. he deserves to be loved in a way that is reciprocal and not based on condition. kristina loved erik so much because erik wasn’t just her firstborn but was also the perfect crown prince. he listened and followed order and played puppet. wille was obviously much more difficult, and since she couldn’t show her love for him by praising his behavior, she just didn’t show him it

[wolf-tail]

Sooo, just to clarify for everyone, I avoid the pro/antiship discourse like the plague because, since I have moral scrupulousity related OCD, enganging with it is the equivalent of huffing formaldehyde for my mental health. Seriously, I became suicidal over it as a 10th grader. For the sake of my sanity, I will take no stance on the topic. But, certain things in certain people's DNI lists may make me block or unfollow them for my own safety. If I do, I promise there's no hard feelings, I am avoiding you for my own sake.

[whimsicalcotton]

Hi it's me the mf with the polluted marrow brainrot, and I bring you semi-coherent rambles about Marrow Max that were brought on by a song I recently found that just fits her like a glove IMO.

(CW: mentions of suicide & suicidal ideation. Just to be safe.)

The other day I discovered a song called Gifts For The Earth by Deafheaven and idk if it's just me but it gives HEAVY marrow max vibes to me. It's a metal song & the vocals are VERY screechy, so I don't know if you'll like the song itself? Although I think the music itself is really good, but the vocals are still a bit distracting to me even after like 20 plays lmao

ANYWAY yeah my main point is the lyrics feel so fitting to Marrow Max's mental state at her lowest point. The song itself is basically about someone giving up their life and surrendering to death through suicide, depicting images of an angel of Death comforting them as they sink to the bottom of the ocean to become one with the Earth once more.

These metaphors make me think of Marrow!Max so much, like I can perfectly imagine her looking over the cliff during the storm at the start of the fic, feeling drawn to jump into the ocean, as Chloe had done once she found out about the time loops. Feeling beckoned to end it all just like her; to let the ocean waves take her in so she can finally stop the suffering.

(Hell, maybe she actually does in a nightmare she has later on, when she thinks she's gonna lose everything in the new reality… Of course she wakes up, and the terror she feels over losing everything might just make her realize how much she needs Rachel and Chloe, and it pushes her to stop running from them. Or maybe they find her and wake her up from her nightmare, as she sees a figure appear through the darkness of the ocean waves, and then Max wakes up, and realizing they're there, eyes filled with concern for *her*, she fully breaks down in sobs)

It could also be read as a metaphor for Max drowning under the weight of all the responsibility she's thrust onto herself, to save Chloe and the others. Plus the ending lines about the flesh disintegrating into consumption for the earth fits how she can no longer see any benefit to her existence beyond what she can do for others, and how she can save or help them. Completely divorced from any sense of self-worth, she gives herself entirely for the sake of others with no concern for her health.

There could also be a read of the song where it's about Max basically killing off/shedding any part of her that is irrelevant to saving Chloe & Rachel, as everything she once was is drowned in the ocean of her subconscious, letting her become single-minded in her purpose. I guess the angel of death in this case would be Chloe, whose safety she puts above everything else? This one is a hell of a stretch but I find it fascinating nonetheless sfhsdfjkshdl

Anyway uhh sorry about the rambly essay in your asks 😅 I just love this AU & fic and cannot stop thinking about it and wanted to share some of the brainrot with you while waiting for the next update; hopefully you enjoyed reading! & if you like the song too even better!

i see what you mean abt the vocals but i am Also a big enjoyer of good percussion/tonal whiplash music/songs that go on for a Really long time so i had a good time w this one actually! thanks for the rec ^^

also don't even worry about it i dearly dearly love reading ppl's rambly essays about this AU sjdkhfsjhfk <3 (that goes for anybody btw never worry abt being rambly in my inbox bc i am probably sitting here uncontrollably happy-stimming abt it)

👀👀👀 to all of these scenarios/readings also. good fucking food