#for silly possum girl

[kadens-a-bee]

how is my favorite loser doing today?/p/lh/j

Tummy and back hurts help help help help help h

[kadens-a-bee]

Okay idk who this guy is but I'm gonna look him up rq

have i played baldur's gate 3 yet? no

have i seen gameplay of the entire game? no

am i still an astarion fangirl? YESYESYESYESYES why do they not make men like that anymore 😭😭

[moon-ttokki-x]

HIII LOVEEE

could you do something about ninth member!reader who found out they were pregnant and are trying to hide it from everyone?? you don’t have too if your not comfortable with pregnancy and stuff

-🪻

hi my love~ just a few shorts thoughts on how skz would react . . . they would be the most supportive people ever and you can't change my mind >< here you gooo~

pairing: ot8!skz x pregnant 9th member!reader

summary: how skz would react to hearing about your pregnancy . . .

genre: this is literally just fluffy, idol!au, 9th member!au, mentions of pregnancy, eating, drinking, worried chan and seungmin, we're naming the baby megatron bc jisung said so, innie and felix's made me cry :(

a/n: 🪻 anon you've outdone yourself . . . skz would be the most supportive members ever :((

skz masterlist

Chan who instantly clears your schedule the moment he hears the news. No more dance practices for you. Reluctantly allows you to moderately exercise, but hovers worriedly nearby like you're about to give birth any minute. Still lets you sing and do interviews, but always has a watchful eye on you. Just in case.

Minho who heads straight to the kitchen and begins planning out nutritious meals. You have to eat snacks in secret because he'll snatch it off you and feed you a proper meal instead. You no longer have to worry about what to cook, because your fridge in the dorm is stocked to the brim with all sorts of deliciousness.

Changbin who gets all huffy when he finds out you've been keeping the news from him and the other members. Forgives you within a minute and recommends some gentle exercises to keep you fit and healthy during your pregnancy. Buys you maternity straps and lots of little helpful items. Secretly hopes the baby is a girl.

Hyunjin who wants to paint you instead of you getting a maternity shoot; even if the bump isn't visible, he'll insist on it anyway. Refuses to let you see until he's finished painting, giggling to himself. When he finally gifts it to you, it's an oil painting of you with a bouquet of flowers covering your stomach in shades of baby blue and pink.

Han who immediately asks to name the baby; goes all pouty when he finds out you don't know the gender. When the perinatal depression hits, he'll come up with all sorts of silly names to make you laugh ("Can we name it Megatron?") and always tickles your stomach with a finger to cheer you up. Wants to teach the baby to rap.

Felix who always has a hand on your stomach whenever you're sitting down; the warmth radiating from his palm is soothing and calming. Is often found gazing at you with soft, loving eyes, before they travel down to your stomach. Becomes even softer and more gently protective after you tell him the news (if that's even possible).

Seungmin who quietly sits by your side after you tell him; he's not sure how to process the news, so he gazes at you with wide eyes and starts to worry just a little. After some reassurance, he'll be fine, but be prepared for the teasing jokes that come after he's recovered from the initial shock ("Did you swallow a watermelon, Y/n?")

Jeongin who immediately starts asking tons of questions; he wants to know everything about the process. Does it hurt? How does it come out? Where is it growing? Can the baby hear him talking? Yes it can. Once the bump starts developing, he can be found sitting by your stomach and singing gently to your unborn baby.

a/n: div by @dollywons

ttokki's taglist: @emilywhyyy @galaxy4489 @hyuneskkami @justsomekpopstuff @wavetohannie @strayingawayy @its-stayville-forever @batty-barty-crouchjr @wickedbutlovely @headfirstfortoro @lov3yv4mps @possum-playground @bear8585 @astraystayyh @m-325 @gnabnahcbby @mbioooo0000 @akindaflora @tsunderelino @hhwangsmoon @crazyforthatbangchandude @bluebellsringinghereandthere @ladylexis @tillaboo

send a dm, comment under the taglist post, or send an ask to be added !

[libraryofgage]

Meddling Kids

Part of: Steve Deserves Good Parents, Actually

Debbie and Fester Addams One | Two | Three | Four | Five | Six Rick and Evelyn O'Connell One | Two | Three Harley Quinn One | Two | Three 10th Doctor and Rose One | Two Scooby Gang One (you're here!) Jedidiah and Octavius (from Night at the Museum) One | Two Queen Clarisse Renaldi One | Two | Three Leverage Crew One

From the girl that brought you that silly little Spicy Six Scooby Movie post (I've been thinking of making that post into one of those social media series things on Tumblr but imma let that cook a little longer actually lmao) is a brand new Stranger Things and Scooby Doo crossover

Anyway, we're here for good vibes and fluffy Scooby gang, so definitely don't point out any typos hfjkds

Have fun reading!

---------

People coming.

Steve freezes, looking at the possum that's scurried into the room and sidled up next to him. He takes a deep breath and forces his shoulders to relax. People have come to explore the abandoned lab before; usually, it's just older kids daring each other to stand inside for a few minutes. There's been that lady recently who likes dressing up as a weird rat-thing, but she hasn't bothered Steve or his friends. Actually, she may not even realize Steve is here.

"Is it the lady again?" he asks, his voice low as he places a hand on the possum's head. He feels its nerves flow through his palm, and it pushes its head against him, snout nuzzling against the 004 on his arm.

No. Four big ones and a beast.

Four adults and a dog, probably. Steve frowns slightly and gets up, carefully making his way across the dirty floor toward the window. He lifts the corner of the curtain and stares at the bright blue, green, and orange van parked in front of the building. Four adults are standing around with a big dog, which isn't looking too happy about being near the place. Steve can't blame it.

He slowly pushes the window open a crack, straining his ears to hear one of the adults say, "Okay, gang. Daphne, Velma, and I will look around downstairs. Shag, you and Scooby will take the second floor. We'll meet back in the lobby in an hour."

"Can't we just, like, not explore the creepy abandoned lab for once?"

Steve assumes this is the one called Shag, and he hopes the other man agrees to just leave. That would make his life so much easier. He hears the dog, Scooby, agree with the sentiment and hopes the other people can understand him, too.

Unfortunately, one of the women says, "C'mon, guys, the monster isn't real. Here, I'll give you some Scooby Snacks for the road."

And that seems to be the end of that. The man and dog accept the snacks, the people enter the building, and Steve resigns himself to hiding for however long they stick around.

He bunkers down, leaning against the wall beneath the window, and goes back to coloring the floor with markers. This entire room is covered in drawings that reach only a few feet up the wall. Steve isn't tall enough to go any higher.

Right now, he's drawing all the animals in the building. There are the ones that were there to begin with (mostly rats and rabbits) and the ones that moved in after the bad people left (possums and raccoons and cats and more rats). He doodles them marching across the floor, a relaxed smile tugging at his lips as he colors a cat purple.

He's putting the finishing touches on the final animal in the line (the very same possum that came to warn him about the people) when he hears a scream from down the hall. Steve blinks, looking up just in time to see Shag and Scooby throw open the door, slide into the room, and slam it behind them.

They lean against it, sinking to the ground, and finally notice Steve sitting against the opposite wall. "Like, Scooby, please tell me I'm imagining that kid over there," Shag says, his voice wavering and cracking near the end.

Scooby starts out looking as scared as Shag, but then he tilts his head. He hesitates for a few seconds before dropping low to the floor and slowly moving toward Steve. "Scoob, what are you doing?" Shag asks.

Not a ghost, Shaggy!

"Not a rhost, Raggy!"

Steve blinks, frowning in confusion. Scooby talked. Like, actually talked. He talked out loud and Shaggy (it makes as little sense as Shag in Steve's opinion) understood him. "There, like, can't be a kid here!"

By the time he says this, Scooby has reached Steve, looking up at him from the floor with hopeful eyes and an eagerly wagging tail. Steve holds himself back for all of two seconds before reaching out and scratching behind Scooby's ear.

The dog lights up and tries to squeeze into Steve's lap, licking his cheeks and covering him in slobber. Steve laughs, trying to evade Scooby's tongue and utterly failing. "Stop, stop!" he shouts breathlessly, still giggling even when Scooby finally gives him a break.

"Oh, man," Shaggy says, slowly moving from the door to approach Steve. When he's a few steps away, he stops and crouches. "What are you doing here, little guy?"

Steve blinks, glancing at Shaggy before turning his attention back to Scooby. He reaches up, scratching under Scooby's chin and trying to ignore his nerves about talking to another human after being alone for so long. "This is my home," he says.

Your home?

"Your rome?"

"Like, man, this is not a good home," Shaggy says, looking around at the dust and the cobwebs and the possum in the corner of the room. "Don't you have, like, parents or something?"

"Not really."

Can we keep him, Shaggy?

"Can re keep him, Raggy?" Scooby asks, his tail wagging hopefully as he looks at Shaggy over his shoulder.

"Gee, Scoob, I don't know," Shaggy says, frowning slightly as he finally sits down on the floor and hunches over. "A kid's a lotta responsibility, man. We gotta feed him and clothe him and, like, make sure he doesn't get sick."

Steve looks between the two and can't help a slight smile. Shaggy is nice, and Scooby is a dog, which automatically makes him good to Steve. He doesn't mind helping them out a little. "You're here about that lady, right?" he asks.

Lady?

"Rady?"

"Like, what do you mean lady?" Shaggy asks.

"The one dressing like a rat," Steve says, wondering how they didn't make that connection themselves. Haven't they already realized it's not a real rat-thing?

"Oh, man, I guess Velma was right," Shaggy says, a relieved laugh bubbling out of him as he slumps even more. "We gotta tell the gang, right, Scoob?"

Yeah, yeah!

"Reah, reah!"

"Are you trying to catch her?" Steve asks, looking between the two once more.

"Well, like, the rest of the gang's gonna want to."

"I can help with that," Steve offers, smiling reassuringly at the concerned looks that Shaggy and Scooby give him in return.

------------------------------------

Hawkins is supposed to be a vacation. Sort of. There's a possible mystery in the town, but even Velma couldn't confirm for sure, and Daphne had encouraged them to just relax.

Steve is inclined to agree with her, especially when she buys them a house with a pool that Scooby immediately launched himself into.

Still, he can tell that Velma won't relax unless she gets a chance to look around, so he finds her to go on a grocery run. "Oh, you're right," she says when he points out the lack of food in the house. "We'd better get something before Shaggy and Scooby start chewing on the walls."

"We'll set up the bedrooms while you get groceries," Fred says, grinning at them from across the living room. He digs in his pocket and pulls out the keys to the Mystery Machine. After making sure Steve is ready, he tosses them over.

"Please just don't put me in that plaid room," Steve tells him, catching the keys and passing them to Velma.

"I think that would count as cruel and unusual punishment, Steve," Daphne calls, her voice coming from down the hall where she's no doubt started setting up her room. She pokes her head into the hall, smiles at him, and adds, "Don't worry. We'll put Shaggy and Scooby in that one."

"Knowing them, they'd like it," Velma says.

As if he was just waiting for his queue, Shaggy leans over the second-floor railing and shouts, "Dibs on the plaid room! It looks groovy!"

Steve snorts as Velma rolls her eyes with an amused smile. "Come on, Steve, let's get going."

The drive to the grocery store is quiet, with Steve paying more attention to the town around him and Velma focusing on driving. He notes anything that looks weird, like the lack of people walking around. They pass other cars, of course, but even when they drive past what could be called Downtown Hawkins, he doesn't see anyone walking around.

He tucks that away for later, seeing nothing else of note until they park near a pile of bikes at the grocery store. "They're not locked," he says, nodding to them.

"It's a small town, Steve," Velma says, unbuckling as she turns the radio down so their ears aren't blasted when they get back. "They probably don't feel the need to."

"I guess," Steve mumbles, hopping out of the van and waiting for Velma to round the front. He walks next to her and holds the door open when they reach it. "Maybe we can get sandwich stuff."

"We'll have to wipe out their entire deli section," Velma says, sighing as she grabs a cart and pushes it towards the produce aisle. "At least we never have to worry about food waste."

Steve hums in agreement, easily falling into their normal routine of Velma calling out items and him grabbing at least five of them if there's enough in stock. "What do you think about that mystery?" he asks, placing a bag of apples in the cart.

"I think that forest out there is prime real estate," she replies, leaning on the cart's push bar. "Get a watermelon, too, Steve. Anyway, demon dogs aren't the weirdest we've run across."

"They were demodogs. Not demon dogs."

"I still think that was just a typo. Either way, I'm sure we can walk around the forest later and, you know, learn what the squirrels have seen."

Steve crinkles his nose, glancing at her as they make their way towards the deli. "You know the squirrels are too flighty. We're better off with the raccoons. Or, like, the sparrows."

He looks over to see her smirking and realizes she was just teasing him. Steve huffs and grabs as many sandwich meats as he can, getting everything but ham since Velma can't eat it and it gives Daphne migraines.

"Well, whichever animals you interrogate, I'm sure they'll clear up this mystery in no time."

Steve hums in agreement, follows Velma into the cereal aisle, and is about to say they should consider focusing on field mice when a voice from the other side of the shelf says, "Dude, spray cheese isn't gonna help us against the demodogs."

He blinks, pauses, and looks at Velma. She tilts her head, holds a finger up to her lips, and waves off the smirk he gives her at being right about demodogs not being a typo. "Yeah, I know," another voice says, followed by the clatter of grabbing a few cans, "but I want Cheez-Whiz."

"That stuff is gross," a girl's voice says, her tone flat in a way that Steve almost recognizes. He frowns slightly, tilting his head as he silently places a few cereal boxes in the cart. "It tastes fake."

"That's the point, El."

"Shouldn't we focus on lighters and hairspray?"

"I mean, this is technically a spray, right?"

Steve glances at Velma, raising an eyebrow before gesturing to the end of the aisle. She nods once and starts pushing the cart in that direction, huffing in amusement when Steve drops in a few more boxes along the way. "You'd think we're feeding an army," she says, tone dry.

"We might as well be," Steve replies, feelings his shoulders relax at the routine exchange.

They round the corner to see three kids down the aisle, two boys and one girl. One of the boys has curly hair and a baseball cap while the other is wearing a basketball jersey, and the girl has short hair that falls to her shoulders. They're all looking at the shelf, but the girl glances over when Velma and Steve enter the aisle.

She meets Steve's eyes, and he wonders if he's met her before. Her eyes narrow slightly, more in confusion than anything else, and her gaze travels down. He feels it on his arm as she lands on the 004, and her eyes widen as she steps away from the shelf.

Steve glances down at her arm in turn, sees the 011, and feels like his breath has been punched out of him. "Eleven," he whispers.

Next to him, Velma shifts closer, placing a hand on Steve's shoulder. "I'm here," she says, her voice low and more reassuring than she'll ever know.

"Four," Eleven says, walking up to him without another glance at her companions. "Are you here to hurt me or my friends?"

Steve blinks. "What?"

"Are you violent? Kali, Eight, was violent. And angry. Are you angry?"

As she talks, the two boys move to flank her, looking between Steve and Velma with something between suspicion and confusion. "Is this one of your siblings, El?" Basketball Jersey asks.

"Yes. Four. He was...transferred a year before the Upside Down. Four, these are my friends Dustin and Lucas"

"I go by Steve now. And, uh, no, not violent. We're grocery shopping," Steve says, awkwardly gesturing to their cart.

"Steve? You can name yourself and you choose Steve?" Dustin asks.

Steve blinks and frowns. "I didn't name myself. I asked the smartest rat I knew to name me."

The two boys blink as El nods in understanding. "The rat chose well," she says.

"Dude, how many people are you feeding?" Lucas asks, seeming to finally notice the shopping cart.

"Well, one of them is a Great Dane," Velma says. "Hello, El. I'm Velma, one of Steve's...guardians, I suppose. How would you like to come by for dinner? El and Steve can catch up, and you can tell us about those demodogs you mentioned."

"Were you spying on us?" Lucas asks.

"You weren't exactly being quiet," Velma tells them.

Before Lucas or Dustin can start arguing, El cuts them off, "We will come by for dinner. I am glad we met again, Steve."

"Yeah. Me, too," Steve replies, smiling at El and wondering if they'll have to explain how Scooby can talk.

----------

Tag List (please let me know if you'd like to be added!)

@romanticdestruction,

[witchaj]

We had a baby possum in the classroom today!

The students were having a break so they were scattered around the room playing with toys. One of them was making silly squeaky noises. I turned around to put something away and there, running along the wall, was the possum. It saw me, I saw it, it saw me seeing it and froze. A wave of emotions washed over me. Possums are my favorite animal and I was so excited to see one, but also I cannot have a possum running around in a classroom full of kids, but also I wanted the kids to see this cool animal.

So I yelled “There’s a possum in here!” They are 5 and do not know what that is, apparently. They said “what?!” I said “there’s a wild animal in the classroom!” They thought I was mistaken. “No, that’s just Liam* making noises,” the children helpfully informed me. “No you guys, turn around and look! There is an animal right here!”

The possum chose this moment to scurry out of sight. The kids are not sure whether I am just confused or playing along with Liam’s game. Thankfully, one little girl, Olivia, looked over quickly enough to see the possum before it got away. She immediately backed me up and started telling the other students there was really “a creature” in the classroom. They all thought she was messing with them.

At this point, I still cannot see the possum. I now have a new problem. I need to find it immediately. I use my absolute most serious teacher voice. “You guys, I know Liam was making animal noises. That is not what I am talking about. There is an actual real live animal in this room. I saw it. Olivia saw it. And now it’s hiding and I need to find it.” Pandemonium. Everyone started screaming and running around. I did not think this through. 2 kids are cracking up because they still think I’m kidding.

I yell at everyone to freeze. They do not, but they do stop screaming. I go in the direction I saw the possum running. I see it poke its little head out from underneath a desk. It freezes again. I keep my eyes on it so I won’t lose track of it if it runs again, which it promptly does. It slips behind a giant pad of paper. I am finally able to grab my phone and get a picture of it.

I call the office manager. She doesn’t answer. I call the principal. She also doesn’t answer. I send a group text (with the picture) to everyone I can think of. Finally they come running! They help me get the kids out of the room and then everyone grabs something to try and catch the poor little possum.

We corner it behind another desk and herd it towards a trash can. I grab a stuffed giraffe and lightly tap it to guide it in the right direction. Thankfully this works. Someone hands me a plastic lid big enough to cover the top of the trash can. The custodian calls some kind of wildlife professional to come get it, but not before we all got more pictures of it. I reach in and remove the white paper to get a better look at it. It hisses at me, but stays put. One of the kids asks if we can keep it as a class pet. Unfortunately I have to be a responsible adult and tell them no, we cannot keep a wild animal as a pet, no matter how cute it is and how much we might want to.

I still can’t believe this happened. It was awesome.

*names changed to protect the identities of the students

[macnmooore]

Vaquero Johnny so i can talk about my headcanons for Johnny, lots of words so be wary

I’m gonna be straight to the point for this one, he’s kinda ugly but in the cute way yk? Like you see a possum and you think aww it’s so ugly it’s cute type shit. That’s how I pictured him because the girl that sat next to me for my elective class described him as utterly adorable and I was like Nu uh his ass is ugly and I kept that mentality until my history teacher explained why people saw him as cute. Like people think he’s cute because he has the classic big ass eyes and he had the potential to be cutest or handsomest guy but he couldn’t since he’s troubled and it kinda just clicked for my then. But also with the whole ugly thing, he’s also tough and hood looking to other people that aren’t part of the gang so I like to exaggerate his ruggishness with his scar and everything about him. Now with that out of the way here is the actual silly headcanons 😭

Since he most likely doesn’t get to shower often you can’t really see his curls all the much so it ends up just looking a bit wavy idk if that’s possible but I also imagine greasing your hair isn’t going to help much with caring for your curls.

He had really fucked up teeth that where never corrected because his parents don’t even love him enough to get him a new toothbrush (lil homie has been using the same toothbrush since the second grade) They don’t hurt him too much much but his jaw does lock up and sometimes causes him to slur his words. His favorite food is anything meaty and rich and also popcorn, m&ms and peanuts. (Idk how he’s eating crunchy foods like popcorn with his fucked up teeth but whatever’s) But he doesn’t get to indulge in those favorites often since his ass usually has to settle for air, water or sleeping early for dinner.

He’s left handed, that’s like the only thing his dad likes about him since he’s also left handed. Speaking of arms! He fractured his right elbow when he was like eight and never told anyone so it healed on its own but healed crooked.

As we still are on the topic of Johnny’s medical history, he either gets sick really easily during the winter or has the toughest immune system nothing in between though.

I know he has a canonical birthday and favorite color but I’m just gonna ignore that. He was born on November 5 (he only exists because of Valentine’s Day) and he looks like he enjoys the color purple idk

Some miscellaneous ones now ig. Painted his nails black since Ponyboy begged him to match with him. Johnny and Dallas have matching dog tags. He likes to name the stray animals. He’s a light sleeper but in the way how soldiers in the military are. They sleep for a few hours but still somehow manage to get a lot of energy from it but can wake up easily when needed, like for Johnny’s case, police sirens. He has a different shade of dark brown in his eyes. It’s very VERY subtle but his right eye is a lighter brown than his left. His dad used to call him a brunt cookie when he was younger. Once the cops pulled up to him at one point and he just stared at them with fear in his eyes and they gave him a number to call if he wanted a lobotomy before driving away.

[rainbowxocs]

(Blah blah blah you know the drill. When the myth is done I’ll update this.)

Name: Amelia Solace.

Alter of: Daisy Bell.

Role: Protector, Caregiver.

Alt Names: Nurse Amelia.

Username: nurseameliax

Nicknames: Ami, Nursey.

Chronological Age: [???]

Age: 17.

Pronouns: She/Her.

Sexuality: “AceAro” Supposedly.

Gender: Cis Girl.

Species: Same as Daisy, but she prefers to be referred to as a demon or NPC.

Disorders: Same as Daisy, however has more anger/behavioral problems.

Physical Disabilities: Same as Daisy.

Religion: Daisyism.

Job: Daisy’s Nurses/Caregiver.

Degree: Claims to have a nursing degree.

Lives in: Headspace, unless needed outside of it.

Languages: English, ADA.

Height: 5’6”

Race: Same as Daisy.

Accent: Robotic, Inhuman, Monotone.

Voice Claim: Cortana from Halo.

Spirit Level: Anger.

Powers: Same as Daisy, but mainly focuses on healing.

Weaknesses: Same as Daisy.

Strings Form: A notepad that has pink bandages and stickers on it. Otherwise light pink cats cradle.

Soul: Barbie Pagoda.

Weapons: Syringes, Baseball Bat, Metal Pipe.

Alignment: Lawful Good.

Text Color: Pink, Sometimes Blue.

Main Animal: Possums.

Main Hobbies: Drawing, Medical Stuff, Puzzles, Collecting.

Favorite Food: She is an NPC therefore she does not eat.

Favorite Flower: Apple Blossoms.

Scent: Sterile, like a Hospital. But vaguely smells of bubblegum.

Handedness: Left Handed.

Blood Color: Bubblegum Pink.

Awareness: Very Aware. (Effect: Very Negative.)

Birthday: December 20th.

Theme:

Battle Theme:

Playlist:

Fun Facts: Amelia is a little bit silly. A bit of a goofball if you will.

Special Interests: Medicine.

Stims: Clicking her pen, shifting her gears, tapping her foot.

Stimboard: [wip]

Moodboard: [wip]

Fashion Board: [wip]

Comfort Objects: N/A.

Family: She is an NPC therefore she has no family.

Friends: She is an NPC therefore she has no friends.

Romance: She is an NPC therefore she has no partner.

Brief Personality: [???]

Brief Backstory: [???]

[goldeneyedgirl]

Ficmas24 Day 4: Anathema

Good night everyone! I am so sleepy, so just a few quick notes (and editing will have to wait til tomorrow because I am about three minutes from being curled up in my bed).

Today's offering is the first private meeting Alice and Jasper have in Anathema. I've had this scene in my head for such a long time, and I need to keep reworking this version to get it perfect. But it's a good start, and I do love exploring how vulnerable and alien this version of Jasper is to humans, to Alice - who is the first person to welcome him closer because she likes him and not out of fear or pity.

I hope you enjoy it, the ask box is still going, and i hope you all have an amazing day today!

I slipped into my bedroom without switching on the light. Dulcie was already tucked up in bed with one of her romance novels, and I knew that Freddie would follow suit as soon as the washing up was done. I also knew neither of them could hear anything that went on in my bedroom from previous experience - mostly all-night marathons of cartoons when my laptop could still reliably stream TV.

Closing the door carefully, and taking the time to jam it shut with an old phone book so that no one could barge in without knocking - I might not have ever been a Girl Guide, but I was always prepared - I walked over to my desk, awkwardly leaning over it to shimmy open the window and call out.

"Jasper?"

It was more of a hiss, really. Not exactly the girlish vision of a balcony scene. And I felt kind of silly - there was the chance I was imagining things. But if I was wrong, no one would hear me, so that made it less ridiculous. And the fact that I was certain that's why my dream and the cards were telling me. No vermin or possums or debris in the roof; Jasper Cullen was, for reasons known only to him (and possibly the future that involved the debasement of the downstairs gurney) hanging out on our roof at night. Specifically, over my window.

And it was completely anti-social, inhuman, and borderline stalker behaviour. Well, total stalker behaviour. But at the same time, he wasn't human. And he had no other way to get to me; I didn't go to school, and I was still under house arrest, even after the debacle with the Lamia. I was sympathetic. The vision of Jasper telling Mrs Cullen that I was the first person to care if he got hurt haunted me. I couldn't imagine being that completely and utterly alone. And I couldn't bear the idea of Jasper, my Jasper, being that alone. Was still that alone.

"Jasper, I know you're there," I hissed again, and waited.

The night was still for a moment before I heard some movement. But instead of him popping into view, there was a blur of movement from the tree next to the house onto the roof-proper.

Well.

Two could play that game.

It was cold tonight and my bedroom seemed to be colder than the rest of the apartment, so I was wearing a long flannel nightgown I’d thrifted. It was deeply unflattering, but so warm; I just looked like some kind of quasi-80s Victorian doll they sold on infomercials. Not exactly the look I wanted when I finally got to talk to Jasper for the first time in private, but I didn’t have time to change or he might leave. I jammed my feet into some shoes beside my desk, and dragged a Forks hoodie over my nightgown before I climbed onto my desk and then out of the window.

There was just enough ledge to balance on my toes and inch along from my window gingerly - immediately regretting my choice of clogs that felt awkward and insecure. But determination won out and I kept inching my way along. The hulking tree that shaded this side of the house was currently the MVP of this debacle - it hid me from view of anyone who might be driving past the funeral home. Nosy neighbours had caught me out a few times over the years, and I didn't really want to add to that list.

Finally having reached the edge of my window, I hoisted myself up by the frame, my fingers clawing for a hold as I somehow manoeuvered myself upwards until I got to the narrow flat roof top, where one Jasper Cullen was looking stunned. Not that I blamed him; it was less 'parkour' that got me up this high, and more 'roadkill frenzy'. The shoes were a bad choice.

"Miss Brandon." His voice is dry again, like he hasn't been talking

"I called out to you," I said grumpily, landing heavily beside him. I'm positive I look insane, with my hair all frizzy and this stupid nightgown. It even had ruffled cuffs and collar that were poking out of the hoodie.

I should have altered it when I bought it. It was just so snug.

"I heard you," Jasper looks down. "I didn't expect you to follow me."

"Neither did I," I reply. "It was a spur-of-the-moment decision." He's here. Right here, with me, and there are no witnesses, no nosy adults eavesdropping, and… just the two of us.

Jasper looks younger up-close. More fragile, like he's being held together by luck and determination, and the next terrible thing could tear him open. He somehow looks more and less human, sitting beside me trying not to look at me.

"Why are you here?" I asked quietly, tucking my hands inside my sleeves. "I just… want to know why you've been creeping around the roof of my house without saying anything."

And suddenly the daisy in the water glass on my nightstand makes sense. We didn't have any blooming daisies, but it could have easily been snuck in by a supernatural guest.

"I didn't want to scare you," he says after a pause. "I just wanted to make sure you were safe."

"You didn't scare me. It's just easier to get to know someone when you talk to them," I span to face him, crossing my legs to keep them under my nightgown - it was cold on the roof. "And I am safe. Most things that come through this area don't venture into town. They don't want to risk being caught."

"No, that's… I was worried your people were upset at the last two meetings," Jasper looks at me. "Mad at you."

"Oh!" I sit back. "No, no one would hurt me. Just a lot of yelling and house arrest. Freddie said that having my jeans ruined by lamia puke was worse than any punishment he could think up."

"You had a bruise on your face at the meeting. It's gone now." Jasper sounded uncertain and it was a strange tone for this stoic guy to use. Both times we had met, he had seemed like a half-wild creature, something much older and more dangerous than I could comprehend. In my visions, there was an energy to him - serious but affectionate and he had this energy about him, almost a playfulness around me. But here and now, he was ill-at-ease but trying desperately to keep it together.

"I fainted in the prep room," I said. "I hit my head. No one is hurting me, Jasper, I promise."

His shoulders relaxed an infinitesimal amount. "I shouldn't be here," he murmured. "Rose is going to kill me. They all told me to stay away from you until Carlisle met with them."

"We don't have to tell them. It can just be our secret," I say quickly, and the way he looks at me is something that I could get used to. I just want to reach out and touch him - push his hair off his face, or run my fingers over the thin scar on his cheek.

"You don't have to protect me," he said. "It's my fault."

"I want to." I want to touch your hair, I want to curl up in your lap, I want to kiss you.

"You're very young," he said doubtfully, but I could hear the waver in his voice.

"I'm nearly seventeen." Roughly, at least. "And we can take it slowly; get to know each other." My inner voice was having a hissy-fit; I needed to encourage him to get closer, not to negotiate some slow trickle to 'friendship'. I had an appointment with this boy on the gurney downstairs, and not the kind that required formaldehyde.

I could almost feel the uncertainty rolling off Jasper.

"Is anyone going to hurt you?" I asked softly. None of the Cullens looked like they would be into violence, but I had also seen the headlock that Emmett Cullen had put Jasper in when he had approached me the first time.

"No, no. The Cullens are good people. None of them know how to fight at all," he says. "I just… they did a lot for me. Do a lot for me. I don't want to make things difficult."

"And I'm difficult?"

He chuckles. "I couldn't have seen you coming in a hundred lifetimes." He looks directly at me. They don't want me to hurt you."

//

Getting off the roof is a lot scarier than going up, I realise as I lean over to sort of scramble down to the guttering. It looks a lot more like a fall that could do some serious harm from this angle. But there's no other way to get down from here, and if I get cut up on the roof tiles, there's a first aid kit in the bathroom.

And a vampire watching me with a frown.

As I crawl backwards - it seems like a good idea to go back down facing the roof - my right clog slips right off my foot, rolling down the roof, bouncing off the guttering and landing in the flowerbed below. I gasp as soon as I lose it, instinctively reaching over to grab it, and the only thing that stops me from following it to the ground is that suddenly Jasper has a fistful of my hoodie, hurling me back up next to him.

"Alice!" It was the most reaction I think I've ever gotten out of him - horrified and exasperated, looking at me like I had just dangled myself over a lions' pit. I would've been fine; I'd fallen out of the tree next to us once when I was younger - I had had grand plans for a Victorian treehouse I could access through my window, and had hauled up planks of wood for the flooring but failed to remember to secure them to the tree. A broken arm (that had healed cleanly in two weeks), fourteen stitches in my head, and a concussion had been the result. å

I'm expecting Jasper to scold me, to read me the riot act of being an idiot - both Freddie and Sue had yelled at me for forgetting to think in the past, and Dulcie usually told me that I didn't have the sense God gave a jellyfish, but he's staring at me, his hand still clenched in the fabric of my hoodie.

"I didn't mean to scare you," I said tentatively.

"You need to be more careful," Jasper said flatly, his voice devoid of emotion. "I can't… you can't get hurt, okay?"

I watch him, watch the play of emotions ripple across his face - frustration, worry, shame, and something I can't decipher.

"I'll be careful," I said, my voice soft and apologetic. "But can you lift me down? I don't think I can get back down by myself."

He looks at me, stunned - I keep surprising this boy - and he nods. Gingerly, I stand up; I am on the roof of a three story building, and the flat space isn't exactly huge. Jasper stands easily, releasing my hoodie to move closer, his arms extended to catch me if I slip.

"Are you ready?" he asks, and I nod.

I'm not sure what I expect, but all of a sudden, I'm swept into a bridal carry. My arms automatically wrap around his neck, and for a second we're just looking at each other. It's ridiculous and corny and cliche, but that's it. There was no stopping this from happening from the very second that I saw him in the woods, but this moment, with his arms cradling me so carefully, this is the moment that I know that Jasper Cullen is my future.

"Ready." I sound a little breathless, even to my own ears. I'm also not expecting to be freefalling for a split second, enough that my head is spinning and I gasp for air. I have no idea the exact jump he made, how he managed it, but in two seconds Jasper is setting me on my feet inside of my bedroom.

I ruin it by half falling backwards onto my bed, disorientated.

"Are you okay? I made sure your neck was supported?" he asked, immediately looming over me.

"It was so fast," I gasped, sitting up again. "How did you get us both through the window?" I thought of the weird little seal-wiggle I'd had to manage to get through on my own.

"Jumped," he answers, still inspecting me.

"I'm okay," I reassure him. "My neck's fine." That makes him relax, and I am once again intrigued by what he knows of humans, what he remembers of humanity.

"You need to get some sleep," he says, standing straight but keeping his eyes on the floor.

"Thank you for getting me off the roof, Jasper," I say, managing to stand up. Feeling bold, I reach out and grab his hand to squeeze it. "Maybe you can come by again?"

He looks at our joined hands and nods slowly. "I can come back." It almost sounds like he's asking a question.

//

I roll over the next morning, still in the hoodie. My window is open a crack, and there's feeble sunshine peering from behind the curtains that I've left knotted up.

And balanced on my window sill, with a little blue flower picked from the lawn resting on the toe, was my missing shoe.

[second-wife-playbook]

Hunger Games Simulator! Second Wife Playbook Edition:

(this seemed fun so here's a progression of how this silly simulator went some some of the pals I've RPed with, and a few I haven't, just to fill in spots :D Enjoy, and let's see if Coronis makes it to the end!)

The Districts:

The Bloodbath:

(Oh no Blitz!!! Well, Stolas, looks like you're gonna be single this round, sorry D: Also Stella coming in for the FENCING MASTER with a sword and sweet Zal punching Octavia is too much JESUS)

(Stolas you bastard! Losing Blitz really turned him! Also GOOD LORD CASS I thought your specialty was TEA not EXPLOSIVES)

End of Day One:

(....well. Good luck Babybird O_O)

Night One:

(WELL THERE GOES THE HEIR TO THE THRONE AND THE MARQUISDOM GODDAMN. Stella you burned your ice-queen bro alive HOW IS THAT AN ACCIDENT. Also Stolas and Cori?!?! Striker, wake up, he's stealing yo girl!)

Day Two:

(Again, Cassandra and Striker seem to have switched, that goat is OFF THE CHAIN. Coronis running to higher ground? Trying to get away? ALSO STELLA WHAT THE HELL YOU MURDERER YOU KILLED ZAL AND YOUR BROTHER???? IS THIS A GOETIA PURGE?)

End of Day Two:

(Slim pickings but Cori is still alive!....And so is Moxxie and Millie aww, couples survivin)

Night Two:

(Moxxie???? Moxxie YOU'RE A MARRIED MAN MOXXIE. Also FINALLY Striker getting in the royal assassination! Sorry Beelzy you didn't deserve it (probably). Stella not killing her husband?????? What?????)

Day Three:

(WELL THERE GOES THE WIFE GOOD GOING MOXXIE. Also did Cori learn to steal from Stolas??? ALSO NOOOOO STRIKKKKERRRRRR!!!!! And then Stolas too?!? This is getting intense!)

End of Day Three:

(So far Stella and Cassandra are the most RUTHLESS BITCHES EVER on this. Coronis still survives though! And no kills, just staying alive. I am sad the Bros Stalker and Striker are dead, fare thee well my cowboys ;_;)

Night Three:

(The theater kids with musical numbers are SINGING! That's oddly cute. Poor Cori though, just singing softly to herself :'( )

Day Four: The Feast

(I think maybe their are no supplies and memoirs for Coronis, because her parents don't like her. Also Ozzie running from this brutal Goat-Girl is amazing given Cass is getting so brutal this round. Poor Beelzabub didn't get to the Feast though awww)

(OH CRAP THERE GOES CASS! I guess all the killing didn't save her big ol' goat feet from making the wrong step. Also Coronis and her sister teaming up a little??? This can't possibly go wrong-)

End of Day Four:

(Only Cassandra died but GOD what a player! Five kills and taken out by a landmine. Sorry about your luck. But Cori still holding out!!!! Let's see how long that lasts-)

Night Four

(......well that didn't take long. So long Cori. You were sadly no match for the wily possum.)

Day Five:

(Disturbingly normal, though I see the Lust Pals are teaming up. Stella has got PLANS for that makeshift slingshot and all of them involve murder, just you wait!)

End of Day Five

(We lost Coronis ya'll ;-; But she's down in Hell with Striker now, so it's all good.)

Night Five:

( YOU SPARED STELLA????? BRUH SHE KILLED LIKE FIVE OR SIX PEOPLE!!!)

Day Six:

(This is getting tense.....)

Night Six:

(WHY CAN'T YOU GUYS TELL YOUR DRINKS APART?????? Also you four are seriously messed up telling ghost stories with Stella, she's gonna MAKE YOU a ghost)

Day Seven:

(OH NO STELLA OH NO. OH AND POOR BABY BOY DAMIAN!!! He's with his big sister now-)

End of Day Seven:

(err....there's only four left. this is about to pick up rapidly)

Night Seven:

(Oh Moxxie baby I hope that doesn't come to haunt you. Also Verosika SLIT HER THROAT she's just going to kill you later-)

Day Eight:

(eerrrr.....guys? what are you talking about????)

Night Eight:

(OH MY GOD ONLY THE GIRLS ARE LEFT THE GIRLS ARE FIIIIGHTINGGGGG)

Day Nine:

(Stella honing those killer instincts. She's had enough of high-society life and now she's a rutheless killer.)

End of Day Nine:

(It's coming down to the wire. These feisty ladies are bound to end one way or another!)

Night Nine:

(OH MY GOD THERE GOES VEROSIKA. Yui learned a thing or two from the wife. It's now Bird vs Fox! Who's it gonna be!??!)

Day Ten:

(.....what?)

(WHAT?)

(THIS IS THE TWISTED ENDING STELLA WINS??????????)

(Well that was interesting! It made sense Coronis never killed anyone but MY GOD Stella was the unexpected victor in my opinion! Among killing her brother and countless others though????? Not bad!)

(Thanks for reading this! Hope you enjoyed it!

@a-hell-of-a-time

@viagoetia

@helluvaoutlaw

@always-sleeping-in-his-grave

@moxxietude

@crystal-infusions

@keeperofquestions

@damian-morningstar

@holyfurnace

[chrishoughton]

As a former weird girl (now odd adult) from a farm in Oklahoma, with the last name Green, this show means alot! I find myself identifying with bunches of my pre-teen experiences with Tilly! I watch the new episodes with my dad and younger brother. I love when we point each other out in the show! Thank you for so much for your art! I also adore the possum/raccoon representation! I simply had to share some photos of my little outdoor darlings black-strap-molasses and chunky-heart with ya'! I would include baby-sundae, but he knows what he did.

I wish you truly the best in whatever you may do! Goodnightey!

Your last name is Green, you've got a younger brother, and you've befriended three opossums and gave them silly names?? Am I talking to some kinda alternative reality Tilly Green?? Amazing... Thanks for watching BCG!

And thank for the pics. Chunky-heart will always have a special place in my chunky heart.

[kadens-a-bee]

<3333 you're my favorite loser, pretty boy/p

The prettiest loser :] <333 /p

[kadens-a-bee]

>:|

@kadens-a-bee >:)

[noodle-is-unstable]

I am going to identify as a threat AND a silly goose. A girl can have it all. 🪿 love this magnificent bastard but the lack of possum emoji is slowly killing me

Anyway check this shit out

They’re just little fellas! Otto broke out of the blocked doggy door bc he let the parasites win (he was prolly barking at the neighbor dog)

Alright I’m going to bed wish me luck it takes less than six hours to fall asleep this time

I hope you got your sleep!!

I always love the Otto and Rutherford updates 💖

I choose to be a threatening goose

[cypriathus]

Updated: April 17, 2025

My asks are currently on!

For those who stumble upon my account... Hello and how are ya? You can refer to me as Yume, Dreamy, Floof, Jora, JJ, Roving, Gryph or whatever nickname you wanna give me. I'm a genuinely curious individual who sometimes gets obsessed with stuff that I eventually want to get engaged with or stuff that I have no intention of trying out, but I'm very fascinated by it. I'm also just a silly, creative 18-year-old Canadian who's trying to get the most out of life.

My general pronouns are she/her, but I genuinely don't mind you referring to me as they/them and he/him.

If you want to know what my MBTI is, I consider myself to be a mix between INFJ-T and INFP.

Some of my hobbies include writing, drawing, listening to music, reading novels and manga, watching YouTube, occasionally watching movies, TV shows or anime, and baking once in a blue moon. For those wondering what kind of art I do, I've primarily been doing a lot of digital artwork as of now. However, I've been using traditional mediums (acrylic paint, markers, coloured pencils, and regular ol' pencils) for many years now. Before we move on with other stuff about me, some of my interests include psychology, sociology, criminology, law, biology, outer space, mythology, folklore, legends, religion, history, internet mysteries, and lost media.

Please do not send me asks for donations

My StrawPage!

A collection of my art

(The userboxes above are made by @custom-userboxes! Go check her out if you haven't done so yet!)

(The userbox above is made by @dead-orange-club! Go check them out!)

In regards to asks...

If you want to send a RP starter or a question and/or something for my characters to answer and react to, please send them to @beautyinafruitfulworld.

If you want to start a random conversation with me or send random stuff like personal questions and memes, please send them to @floofgryph.

If you want to send questions about Metal Slug or my Metal Slug AU, please send them to @thesilliestrovingalive.

If you want to send questions about my work overall or send me a little something that won't spark much discussion like a positive message, please send them here.

If you want a moodboard, please send your request to @odysseyofmoods.

If you want to interact with my persona, please send your asks at @comingtoaskthecosmos.

I listen to a myriad of music artists including:

Muse

Set It Off

System Of A Down

Citizen Soldier

Fall Out Boy

Finger Eleven

Get Scared

Avenged Sevenfold

Sick Puppies

Hoobastank

Breaking Benjamin

Infected Musroom

AURORA and so much more

I have watched a lot of anime and there are still some I need to get around to watching eventually. Some of these anime include:

Cat Soup

Ergo Proxy

FLCL

Perfect Blue

Tokyo Godfathers

Neon Genesis Evangelion

Kaiba

Haibane Renmei

Outlaw Star

Now and Then, Here and There

Serial Experiments Lain

Summer Wars

Belle

Angel's Egg

Most Studio Ghibli movies

Cowboy Bebop

Metropolis

Steamboy

The Tatami Galaxy

Mind Game

Maquia: When the Promised Flower Blooms

Mononoke and so much more

Non-anine movies and TV shows that I remember watching:

Breaking Bad franchise

Seven

American Psycho

American History X

Videodrome

A Clockwork Orange

The House That Jack Built

Tokyo Gore Police

Cannibal Holocaust

Coraline

ParaNorman

Mad God

Schindler's List

Final Space

Clone High

Cliffhanger

Del Toro's Pinocchio

Tetsuo film trilogy

Cube film trilogy

Possum

The Mask

The Wedding Singer

Labyrinth

The Dark Crystal

Lord of War

Midsommar

Hereditary

Scarface

Evil Dead

Martyrs

Bullhead (also known as Rundskop)

Jacob's Ladder

Rosemary's Baby

Monty Python and the Holy Grail & Monty Python's Life of Brian

Silence of the Lambs

Popee the Performer

Mr. Stain on Junk Alley

The Devils (1971)

Funny Games (1997)

Rampage (2007)

And many more

Some manga and books that I have currently read are:

Homunculus

Chainsaw Man

AKIRA

The Girl from the Other Side: Siúil, a Rún

The Ancient Magus' Bride

Dandadan

Trigun and Trigun Maximum

Bibliomania

Heads

Goodbye, Eri

Look Back

Yogen no Nayuta

Eden: It’s An Endless World

Keyman: The Hand of Judgement

Shigahime

Rojica to Rakkasei

BLAME!

Nausicaä of the Valley of the Wind

I Have No Mouth, and I Must Scream

Animal Farm

The Green Mile

Salem's Lot

Lord of the Flies

The Catcher in the Rye

To Kill a Mockingbird

The Complete Tales of H. P. Lovecraft and more

Rules:

I would like to stay anonymous for the most part, so don't pry me for certain information that I don't feel comfortable sharing. I'll only share bits and pieces of my life if I feel comfortable doing so.

Don't ask me for pictures of myself or I'll block you immediately!

Don't be rudely judgemental

Don't say discriminatory and sexually disgusting things

Don't threaten me

Don't tease me, even if it's a joke!

Don't spread accusations without any solid proof to me or I'll seriously demand you for it!

Don't spread hate about my friends or I'll tear you a new one!

Don't ask me for money/donations or I'll ignore you

Don't ask me to reblog something from you or I'll ignore you

Don't send me asks regarding real world crises or I'll ignore you

Don't send me reminders that I'm capable of remembering (e.g. a reminder to drink water)

Don't mention pre-existing fictional characters or other forms of media through the comments, reblogs, and inbox.

Don't tag me without my permission first! You're allowed to freely tag me in OC work, moodboards, important announcements, and moot/family stuff that doesn't involve a tag game.

Don't give me suggestions on what to do when I'm in a good mood or trying to calm down because it only makes me feel more frustrated/miserable and puts unnecessary pressure on me. I fully know my healthy coping mechanisms and have free will to choose whatever I feel like doing. So, I don't need people telling me what to do.

Don't recommend me pieces of media I should watch and/or read because that gets under my skin really badly as I view it as a threat to my independence and freedom of choice. If you try to pressure me into a piece of media, I'll tell you off.

Please don't come to me to rant about your romantic partner or crush unless there's a real issue you need help figuring out.

Please be clear and patient when you talk to me. I'm still struggling with the lingering effects of my language delay and speech impediment.

If you want to provide constructive criticism, give me more than one thing to work off of because it'll give more of an opportunity to grow.

Do not interact with me if you're one of the following (I'll add more if needed):

TERFS!

AI "artists"

Drug dealers

Porn blogs and sex bots

Pedophile

Anti-LGBTQ+

Racist

Sexist/misogynistic

Ageist

Ableist

Pro-Israel

Misandrist

Islamophobic

MAGA

Supporters of terrible organisations like PETA

Someone who invalidates a person's pronouns, gender, and/or identity.

Someone who supports, participates, tolerates, and/or justifies any of the above.

That's most of the stuff you need to know about me as of now. Anyways, as I mentioned in the description, I plan on using this blog as a way to share various ideas in regards to my personal writing projects. I'm open to listening to your ideas, sharing new ideas, and even constructive criticism! I hope you enjoy your stay here and I can't wait to share my ideas with y'all!

Writing Projects:

[yanderefarm]

Bro! Lucky! My family would be ecstatic to have a baby opossum trying to move in! One of my cousins literally has a rule that she's only allowed to keep a baby opossum if it's clearly abandoned. We'd have adopted that adorable guy immediately. I'm gonna break into ur house to take ur possum. Maybe take my demented little sister to give you top surgery in exchange for either your soul or a bone, maybe an eye, she's odd. Not for free unfortunately, but for no money!

-🪼

top surgery but more advanced where she also takes the extra rib girls have so im even more masc.

listen i would have loved to adopt a baby possum they're so cute and silly. id feed him ants and name him rabies. unfortunately I was not allowed to have a possum.

[ace-does-stuff]

when the zeroes line up on the twenty four hour clock

Summary: this is their silly little ritual, they have to fill it out

Warnings: violence, blood, swearing

Authors Note: @kenmanweek2023 behold!! day 5, hope ya'll enjoy and if you do consider dropping a reblog

"Mysterion,"

"Coon,"

The hybrid glances up to the sky, so does the vigilante. The moon hangs full and high in the blanket of velveteen darkness. There's a comfortable beat of silence between them as they drop their gazes to meet once more.

That in itself is more than enough initiation to be on each other once again.

Mysterion is swift to have The Coon trembling, beating down on him as he blocks and dodges over and over. It's give and take, back and forth, kicks and slashes, but they stay relatively quiet all the way through their dance.

This spar they do has become a ritual at this point, every month when the moon is full and the city loses it's electricity (courtesy of Call Girl) they meet somewhere and fight. They brawl, they scream, they bleed, they bruise- but this is their thing. They hold on tight and don't let go, fingers digging into flesh and tearing open their outfits.

Hands come to rest at The Coon's neck and squeeze, in retaliation metal claws swipe across Mysterion's face. Where hands laid deep bruises start to blossom, and blood trickles down the vigilantes face. He wipes it aside as the hybrid heaves some breathes, and then they're at it again.

How long they fight for is lost on them, they just know that they start when the church bell tolls at the strike of midnight. They keep going until they're thoroughly bloodied and ragged, and then they kiss. Desperation to keep at each other mutates rather swiftly no matter how much they both desire to keep the spark as hatred. They need this, they need it so bad. Grasping at each other and not even caring as one of them is bashed against a wall for supports.

It's well into the AM when they finally stop, hauling each other home in the night.

"Idiot,"

"Asshole,"

-/-/-/-

"What the fuck happened to you two?!"

Neither Kenny nor Cartman answer the question, Kenny tracing over the slices on his face and Cartman the bruises on his throat.

"Possums weren't too kind," Kenny said.

"Moms lover didn't know she had a kid," Cartman said.

Their friends don't need to know this intricate little ritual they complete every full moon. They really don't, they'd hurl if they knew that Kenny and Cartman brawled for sick kicks every month. So Cartman and Kenny both keep their mouth shut on the manner up until they're in the streets, swapping blood like spit.