#for her daughter and how traumatizing this must be

[lullabyes22-blog]

"I think the cycle only ends when you find the will to walk away."

Got a lot of Q's for this in my inbox. Figured I'd just address them here.

tw: mentions of suicide, suicidal ideation

Re: the ending of S2:

Jinx did not die.

She symbolically killed her old self, and with it, her last ties to the past that imprisoned her. She understood that for her sister to move on and live her life - be happy without guilt - she'd have to renounce the bonds that held them together.

Her talk with ghostly Silco was the 'sign-off' she'd been waiting for, ever his dutiful daughter. Throughout S2, she kept hoping he'd haunt her, and in doing so, offer some impetus given her aimlessness. Maybe just straight up boss her around, and tell her how she's supposed to exist now that he's no longer there to be a (subversive if loving) guiding hand.

But it was the promise of time (as represented by Ekko) healing old wounds, and the courage to feel, as she once had - a hopeful child with a hopeful future - that allowed Jinx to commit impetus to action.

Her blimp-ship in the climactic battle is a tribute to Isha - but also to the child in Jinx's own fractured psyche: Powder. She's letting both little girls have one last hurrah before she takes care of business - and cuts off the last oaths, duties and commitments that bind her to a past whose parameters she's outgrown.

Better still, she knows she's got the capacity to outgrow them.

That was the point of Jinx's arc with Isha, and why, no matter my misgivings on Isha's character herself, I found Jinx's trajectory towards a more nurturing and fun-loving figure more life-affirming and positive than the straightforward 'Daddy's Villain Goes Postal' shtick.

It's even why there's a minigame titled Jinx Fixes Everything. It's Jinx, struggling and stumbling, as she tries to rewrite her narrative, and finds in herself the capacity to do good.

To fix things that seem irreparably broken.

And to understand why she's reached this stage, we've got to let go of our tendency to project our own stuff onto Jinx (precious meow meow, unrepentant terrorist, manic pixie crazypants, edgy hot psycho) and acknowledge the purpose she plays in Arcane's thematic structure.

Jinx's character comes off as a death-seeker, and that's no shocker. She is hounded by terrible guilt and loss. She's got blood on her hands, and ghosts on her heels, and no matter what she does, she can't seem to be rid of them. Her inner mind's fractured, her mannerisms ooze pure chaos, and she seems a creature of pure feral impulse and no mercy.

That's the Jinx we're accustomed to seeing in S1 - except that's also both the front she's most likely to put on during that timeline, and the persona that is necessary for her to inhabit to survive, as Silco's daughter and his top enforcer.

Then Silco kicks the bucket, she symbolically fulfills his dream by shooting at the Council HQ, she accepts that she must inhabit this path of shadows and loneliness (as symbolized by her starkly decorated chair in the tea party scene), she accepts the fragmented push-and-pull between past and present, and...

And now what?

Silco's given her a semblance of direction for six years, and he's gone. Vi, the sister she'd hoped would return, and whom she'd hinged so many childishly idealized hopes on, is herself traumatized, and afraid of what her sister's become.

Jinx has her shadows and her loneliness. Jinx is traumatized. Jinx is suicidal.

But Jinx is still, whatever else, alive.

And all living things need connections.

That's why we as the audience enjoy her little found family dynamic with Isha and Sevika. It's Jinx, taking the first tentative steps to reach out to people beyond Silco and Vi, and realizing, wow, she enjoys the pay-off.

And all throughout S2, we see Jinx growing more and more comfortable in this newfound space - even jealously guarding it at the expense of Zaun's liberty, and Silco's wishes, because she can't bear to lose what she's found.

And what she finds empowers her enough that, when Warwick shows up, she's actually willing to reach out to Vi, and call upon their family connection, because Jinx is learning the value of bonds, not as baling hooks of guilt, but as buoys to carry her forward.

That's the story Jinx's relationships serve to tell in S2. Each one shapes the choice she makes in the finale. Until she learns to accept the past (Vi), to lay the monsters to rest (Silco and Vander/Warwick), forgive herself (Caitlyn) trust that time heals all wounds (Ekko), and hope for happier new beginning (Isha), she'll never trust herself enough to just seize the chance.

Jinx's culminating arc is not about death, much less self-erasure. It's about resurrection, and embracing the sublime chaos of a freed mind, and a lightened spirit. That's what she craves beyond simple death, and what her baptism by fire, blood and riverwater, has been about.

Each trial grinds her down into someone else. Someone new.

Someone closer to who she is meant to be, rather than who she's expected to be.

That's why she's so glad to make the sacrifice for Vi. She's not dying as an act of self-immolation. She's giving her sister - the one who's proven she'll never give up on her - the ultimate gift, and showing Vi that she deserves to live.

She needs Vi to live, so Jinx, the persona, can finally die.

"He (Silco) didn't make Jinx. You did."

She's basically saying, "I love you, I will always be with you, but you are no longer responsible for my actions. Please move forward with your life, and grant me the choice to do the same."

It's two sisters embracing everything they've meant to each other, acknowledging the pain weighing them down on both sides, and welcoming the new so they can each slough off old paradigms and live life as a whole person - or at least take steps to remembering what wholeness feels like.

That's the reason the show's final shots linger on the Hexgate tunnels, Jinx's monkey bomb, and the aircraft.

It's the show's way of reminding us that Jinx has ascended to a different version of her identity - one removed from the past that haunted her. It's Jinx, finally striking out alone, away from the sister whose memory she clung so desperately to, and who was, in turn, horrified by her hand in making Powder a monster (perceived guilt or real, fandom may debate ad nauseum) due to past mistakes and abandonment.

The ending of Arcane isn't tragic. It's deeply hopeful, and serves as a reminder that no matter how damaged you think you are, and no matter how monstrous the world finds you, there are still ways to come back to yourself - or to walk the path toward a new you.

Jinx is symbolized by crows. Jinx is shown with firelights emerging from her mouth. Jinx is depicted holding a torch like Janna ushering in the winds of change.

Thematically, Jinx is change.

And the best way she can embody that change is to write her story, and make it her own.

[willowed-wisp]

könig as a dad (part two)[ könig ]

part one | part three

- In your second pregnancy he is much more likely to take in more missions (you told him to- ordered even)

- He HATES being away from you and your little boy.

- Marvels at how much he has grown in a couple of weeks.

- When his missions last for more than a fortnight, he goes stir crazy but focuses on the task at hand to get back to you

- Nobody knows he’s a dad at KorTac, he’s not close to any of them

- His greatest fear is for his kids to ever be scared of him.

- When he comes back, you don’t even realise until you see him in the rocking chair by the crib- your baby boy in his arms. Whatever wounds he has tended to by you, you MUST insist and pry your son away from him.

- Is glad that your boy will have a sibling very close in age- conceived a month after his birth. He was a very lonely child, he’s glad his kids won’t have the same experience.

- Presents you with another crib, and would be offended if you ever bought one.

- The cribs are very stable and thought carpentry looked good on him.

- He was going to teach his kids it, as his grandfather taught him.

- Your kids are named after his grandparents (I’m convinced he was raised by them in the Austrian countryside) and they were the only source of kindness in his traumatic childhood.

- The birth comes and it’s another boy.

- Next pregnancy comes in quick succession, and it’s a baby girl.

- Ahhh, that was why he got a four bedroom house… sly bastard.

AGES 0-4:

- Not afraid to change diapers or sick, he’s seen so much shit in the field… it doesn’t phase him

- Records everything! He’s such a documenter, he has very little photos from his youth so makes sure he takes them in excess.

- He manages to record all three children’s first steps and jots down their first words.

- Loves watching you teach your kids very early on, is so proud whenever they do something new.

- Your boys take after his height, they stick out like a sore thumb in nursery when around the other kids. And König doesn’t tolerate bullying, you rein him in from going yourself.

- He’s been known to make grown men cry and the kids at nursery look at him in fear. Even if he smiles.

- Mums flirt with him sometimes, he ignores them. He’s only there for the kids.

- Is sad when your kids start growing out of clothes, reminds him they’re growing up and in a matter of years they won’t need him anymore.

- He loves your kids equally but may be more attached to your daughter. She was premature and doctors said she may not make it.

- Cried in private when she was stuck in an incubator for weeks on end. He doesn’t want to burden you or unsettle the boys.

- When she could be held, he couldn’t let go. His sweet angel, so tiny compared to his large body. A kiss to her forehead.

- Your sons don’t know what to make of the small creature that cries in the middle of the night. You hoped they would come to understand what happened when they were old enough.

AGES 5-9

- Your boys look out for each other in school- König made sure of it.

- He also instilled them to watch over their little sister when she would attend primary school.

- You had to hide a bullying incident, every one of them concerning your little girl. Knowing what would happen if König found out.

- But he knew. He checked in with her every day after school and she told him, “It’s because I’m littler than them,”

- “I was picked on, for being too big…”

- “Really, papa?” With eyes like his own, the soul hadn’t been taken out though. “I wish I was tall like you…”

- He holds her on his knee, “You are perfect just the way you are, little mouse.” Giving him the love he rarely had gotten from his own parents.

- His constant lesson to his children is ‘be yourself’. Something he wishes he had learned at that age and onward.

- If your sons are picking on each other, he puts them through the wringer and gives them a hard time.

- He lets them then figure it out between themselves.

- Helps with homework, though literature and comprehensive skills aren’t his thing. Science and maths are his jam, though. Your kids are getting good grades from homework assignments.

- Walks them home from school, on the daily.

————

masterlist

[bella-goths-wife]

Yandere Vs reaction to pet reader accidentally killing someone out of anger

Warnings: toxic relationships, mentions of drug use, SA mentions, Valentino, death, description of wounds, forced affection, forced father-daughter relationship, workplace bullying, grooming mentioned, guilt

You were used to your coworkers being assholes to you

You were a fellow working soul yet you were treated nicer and given many more privileges then them, of course they weren’t going to like you

Everyone referred to you as a lost puppy or as a pet

They didn’t even know your name, but know one really knew your name in fairness

They sneered when they saw you enter a room, and if the Vs weren’t accompanying you then they would get physical by tripping you or shoving you around

Angel dust does his best to defend you when he sees this happen, but angel rarely has time to think nevermind look after you

But the rumours were the parts that upset you the most, to here small parts of your life become exaggerated and spread around

They’d also dump their workload on you so you had to do even more stuff while also balancing three very obsessed bosses

But something pushed you over the edge today, something that angered you so much that your power spun out of control

You’d had a certain guy around the tower spread vicious rumours about you lately and you could always hear the whispers following you because of them

“I heard she killed her friends”

“I heard she was a whore who overdosed with her junkie boyfriend”

“I heard that she only gets good treatment because she’s fucking one of the bosses, or all of them by the looks of her”

Many misinformation or misunderstandings spread around by this man would end up being whispered near you

So one day when you were in voxs office alone and this guy walked in, you knew something bad was going to happen

He made a few smart ass comments about your rumoured past but you just rolled your eyes and ignored him

But he pushed it to far when he uttered the words “they really groomed you into their perfect little pet huh?”

You shot him a glare as you questioned what he meant by that

He then went on a long rant about how it wasn’t fair that you got better treatment all because you were willing to throw away your dignity for their enjoyment

With every word he uttered about the luck you supposedly had caused rage to spark in your chest

The cherry on top was when he said “I wonder what your mother would think if she found out what a fucking whore you are and how she must have fucked you up real bad for you to have this little self respect”

One minute he’s standing over you and smirking at you, the next he’s crumpled on the floor covering his ears and screaming in agony

You couldn’t stop using your ability to create loud and excruciating noises directly in his ears, it’s like you’d been completely taken over by the anger you felt

You saw blood pouring out of his ears like a fountain and you couldn’t help but smile and increasing the volume, until he stopped moving except for a few twitches and you saw what looked like brain matter leak from his ears

You had killed him

You just stood in shock and stared at his body while processing this information that you’d killed a man in cold blood

And the Vs saw it all happen from the open door

Vox:

Vox almost felt like a proud dad as he watched you kill someone purposefully for the first time

He came up and patted you on the shoulder with a wide smile, as if you’d just passed some sort of test

He wrapped his arm around your shoulders and rambled on about how you could improve and what you did well, almost like a performance review for a singers night show

What had been a world changing and traumatic experience for you, was purely just entertainment for him

He couldn’t understand your shell shocked expression, you had killed this man while smiling so why were you overreacting so much

But he still walked you back to your room and cleaned the blood off of your body and sitting you on your bed

He went on a long rant about how you shouldn’t feel bad about your murder, he was provoking you and it was clearly all his fault

He said that he understood why you did what you did, and that he was proud of you for your decision

“I started out like you, but you’ll improve over time and get used to it” he had said with a wide grin “soon enough you’ll be just like me”

And the fact that you were seen as in any way comparable to Vox only sent a chill down your spine and doubled your guilt

After that day, you noticed people were much nicer to you and Vox only gave you a ‘told you so’ look

But since becoming aware of the harassment you were subjected to, he did give voxtech employees a strict warning and he broke a few bones to get his point across

He couldn’t have something like a little murder bring his favourite girl down, even if it did prepare you to become his heir one day

Velvette:

Velvette doesn’t really understand the big deal

Your in hell, you fraternise with murderers and worse on a daily basis

You live in a tower filled with the worst of the worst kind of criminals

So why are you overreacting so much over a little murder that could easily be sorted out

She does scold you slightly on doing your own dirty work and doing it on the expensive carpeting

She explained that if you really want someone dead then you should just tell one of them and they’d have their security deal with it

But she did express some pride for you efficient killing and you experiencing your first purposeful murder

She does nothing to comfort you at all, you should be over it already is her thought process

But she does kill more people around you in her own sick away to reassure you that murdering people is okay in her books, she only makes you want to peel your own skin off though because every sight of blood just makes you think about the fact you ended a man’s afterlife

She also makes an example of the man you killed to her employee, harass her pet and her pet will bite back

She makes a few more private examples or your bullies, but she’ll wait until the rumours of the event hits you before she explains

Valentino:

This entire situation is just a joke to this man

His little princesa bites as much as she can bark, and he’s meant to take that seriously?

He does much worse stuff then murder every day and you don’t see him she’ll shocked and crying on the floor do you?

He will actively crack jokes about one of the most traumatic things you’ve ever done in front of you

Every time he does and you get a guilty or shocked expression, he bursts out laughing at the ridiculousness of your reaction

But he would clean up the body for you

He’d either just dump it into the cannibal colonies or he’d just get his workers to get rid of it and clean up the office

But he’d definitely keep a body part of a piece of jewellery from your victims body to taunt you with when he’s bored

He also gave a few extremely rough video sessions to some of the people from him workers that contributed to your harassment

He can’t have his little musical toy become too tired to sing him a soothing tune to calm his ever present temper

Sorry this was so small, work exhausted me today :(

Tag list so far:

@buttercupfangirl @repostingmyfavs @lilyalone @the-faceless-bride

[a-hazbin-reader]

Can I request how Alastor would be when wifey was giving birth to any of the kids??

Alastor X Reader Headcanons

✅️Romantic

❌️Platonic

TW: Childbirth?

Description: 👆⬆️

When you go into labor, Alastor is probably in an overlord meeting or something when he gets the news

On the outside he's very calm, simply nodding and standing up while dusting himself off

"Ah, my most sincere apologies but I really must be going! Carmilla, your assistance would be deeply appreciated!"

Carmilla immediately gets the hint and ends the meeting early, Zestial and her daughters trailing behind her

Of course all the other overlords are curious af but Alastor doesn't give them the satisfaction of an answer

"Is it your pretty wife, radioman? She having the baby already?!"

Velvette is shoving her phone in his face and already opening up all her social media apps, Alastor simply walking around her

"Another time, my dear Velvette~"

In fact, he's all laid back smiles and effortless charm just like always, despite everyone else around him panicking

Charlie

"Charlie~ My dear, you must calm down! My wife is the strongest woman I know! She will be fine..!"

He instills confidence in everyone else around him until he's actually alone with you

Husk is the only one who sees through his facade but doesn't comment on it, simply sliding Alastor a single shot to knock back

He refuses to let anybody in that isn't strictly necessary, so Charlie is booted out, and Niffty has to be escorted out like five times

He tries to convince Zestial to leave, but at that point, he's much too focused on you

His grip on your hand is just as tight as your own and his smile is strained with worry, his usual air of confidence has now turned into quiet anxiety

Alastor's lips are nearly pressed against your temple as he whispers soft words of encouragement and apologies to you, rubbing your hip soothingly

If you're in a lot of pain or the birth is extremely traumatic for you then he'll feel guilty and give Lucifer a few dirty looks because it's partly his fault too

He is very soft and gentle with you throughout the entire labor process no matter how you treat him, he's only worried about you and the pain you're in

"This is all your fault! You did this to me!You terrible man!!"

"I know, darling... I'm sorry, please forgive me."

Once you've given birth then he's wiping sweat from your forehead and telling you how proud he is of you, cooing at you and trying to make you smile even though you're exhausted

"Even when you've been through such an ordeal, you're just as beautiful as ever, darling~"

Of course he's super interested in the baby too, checking them over and just watching you hold them with a lovesick expression

Your husband is also eager to hold his child, singing you to sleep while rocking the baby in his arms

He dotes on you and the baby, making sure every need is taken care of and crawling into bed to join the snuggles if you let him

He absolutely doesn't leave your side until you're practically begging him to give you space, and even then, he's reluctant to leave

"Darling, surely an hour is too long? Can't we shave it down to thirty minutes and I'll bring you back some jambalaya?"

He has the biggest, sweetest, most earnest look on his face. You almost forget he's a cold-blooded killer and a demonic overlord

"Make it forty minutes and bring me an extra pillow, please?"

"It's a deal~"

It's so sweet and domestic that it makes his teeth hurt, but he wouldn't trade it for the world

[azziesbattybaddie]

Shadows and Snow Angels

Azriel x Reader, Azriel x child OCs

Chapter 2 - My scars won't heal

Normally when your mate Azriel comes home from the camps and asks you not to get mad it's because he brought home another wounded animal, not a baby boy...

Word count: 1.5k

💔 💘

Series warnings: past emotional abuse, past physical abuse, past emotional trauma, non explicit thoughts of suicide, depression, parental doubt, child abandonment, past child abandonment, brief talk of past pregnancy. no details mentioned, mention of non explicit SA, we die like men. Every chapter will be individually tagged.

If you don't like what your reading click off!

Author's note: ok, so I kinda his a manic a episode and now I'm writing the second chapter literally the minute I posted the first. We'll see how long it will take me to finish this one but if y'all are lucky, maybe we'll get 2 chapters in one day!

Author's note 2: lucky streak gone but at least it'll be on time. I'm gonna try to post a new chapter every Friday, but we'll see how it goes, life's kinda crazy rn.

Chapter warnings: brief talk of child abuse, Azzie is a traumatized baby, this chapter is actually more fluff than angst but still, we die like men.

Rhys opened the door, only in his pajamas with his hair sticking up in random places. It must have been a long night. Nyx just turned two a couple months ago and he was having a horrible time sleeping through the night. Rhys and Feyre took shift but everyone knew that Rhys was the one that usually stayed up with him.

"hey I'm sorry, I know it's late, or well early, but we officially have an emergency." You said while Rhys just glanced between the two of you, it took him a good second to realize that there was suddenly an extra little one with you both. Azriels shadows darted past Rhys's feet to go check if the house was safe.

"yeah come on in, I'll go get Feyre." Rhys stepped aside and let you both in before jogging tiredly up the stairs to get his mate. You quietly sat down on the couch to re adjust the little hat Elain made for Astrid, fixing it to sit on her delicate head better. You chuckled as Rhys's appearance. Who knew that out of get trapped in hell for 50 years, enduring another war and having a baby, it was the baby that finally got him. "Poor high lord."

Azriel was still standing but he seemed to be enjoying bouncing Rhain in his arms, rocking him side to side as his shadows created a Shadowy mobile above them. He chuckled softly at your comment, glance in his brothers direction before looking back to the little boy in his arms. They were practically making heart eyes at eachother, if it wasn't so late at night you might have asked Feyre to paint it.

The way Azriel interacted with children was honestly what drew him to you in the first place and the ease in the way he can calm them makes your heart melt every time. Your mate was always so still and calm so seeing him bouncing and sway your daughter and the same way he does with Rhain now, made your heart soar higher than the stars above.

You were still smiling at your mate when you heard rushed footsteps flying down the stairs. You didn't have to look up to know that Feyre was running to come see the little one. The Shadows flared defensively but calmed at the sight of their high lady.

"OK, WHERE TH-" you shushed her quickly before she woke up all three kids in the house. She was still in her night gown and her hair was tied back messily. "Sorry, where the hell did this little cutie come from!..."

You chuckled as Feyre took Rhain from your mate. He looked skeptical and basically hovered over his sister in-law as she cuddled the baby. The Shadows however, seemed content to huddle around you and Astrid on the couch, completely ignoring their masters anxious behavior.

"Az, would you calm down, she's not gonna drop him." You say barely containing your laughter. He was actually just as overprotective as the day you brought your daughter home. It was adorable.

"Oh my gods! What's his name?!" Feyre squealed quietly and came to settle on the couch next to you. Rhain was babbling softly and grabbed Feyre's finger in his small hand.

"Rhain. His name is Rhain." Azriel said, still standing next to feyre, he's hands twitching at his side, wanting to take Rhain back from her. You shook your head at his antics, he's had this baby in his care for like 2 hours and he's already acting like Mother hen.

"I'm sorry, I know it late and I know that Nyx id having issues sleeping but we don't have anything that will fit him and I decided that this officially classified as an emergency."

"No, don't worry about it at all! Not at all, no! Not at all!" She said less to you as she cooed down at your little boy before actually lifter her gaze to you and responding. "Yeah, absolutely this is an emergency. Come on I'm sure I could spare some jumpers for him, Cauldron knows that Rhys is gonna buy him more anyway."

Feyre stood and tried to walk away with the Rhian still wrapped I her arms but a wall of shadows came to block her from walking away just long enough for Azriel to take him back. Feyre just rolled her eyes and lead you upstairs, muttering jokingly to herself about Azriel being overprotective.

2 hours later you all were back at your own home, azriel settling the baby's down for bed. You had added a temporary separator in the crib just for tonight, you'll have to make a trip to the Palace quarters tomorrow for another one. Your mate had just finished building your daughter's nursery and now you're either gonna have to rearrange everything or finds another room in your home for a second nursery... Wonderful...

Once they were both swaddled, wings and all, they were out like a light before he could flip the switch. You were sitting in bed trying to read and relax but you mind was reeling from the days events. Your mind wandered to Rhain. He was so small, he still had that fresh baby smell. You had tried to explain the smell to Mor one time but she thought you were crazy, must be a mom thing. He was underweight and dehydrated from what you could tell, the poor thing could barely suckle the bottle you had fed him earlier. You were lost in thought, book discarded laying open in your lap, as Azriel came into the room, his footsteps as silently as ever.

"So how much trouble am I in?" Your head snapped up at his voice. 4 years... 4 years you had been together and he still manages to sneak up on you, you'd think you would be better at spotted him now but no. You looked up at him, you eyes locked on him as you pulled yourself from the whirlwind of questions and worries you had gotten lost in. He was leaning forward against the bed frame at the foot of the bed. His Shadows fluttered and flitted out into the room randomly as per usual when it was time for bed. It was interesting, most people thought Azriels Shadows were just extensions of him but in reality, most of them had personalities and curiosity, it was kinda cute to watch them.

"come here..." You opened your arms for him and waited as he quickly shrugged off his leathers and siphons, a few of the Shadows helping him by catching his siphons and placing them on the dresser silently. He sank onto he stomach and into your arms with a sigh. He nuzzled his face into your chest as his wings relaxed and sprawled across the massive bed.

"I'm not upset with you. I mean I would have loved a heads up that we were gonna adopt an infant today but I know that the circumstances were anything but ideal. Trust me I would have been PISSED if I found out you didn't bring him home. You are the most compassionate and empathetic person I've ever known. Thats one of the reasons I love you so much." You smile as you feel every muscle in his body melt under your hands, your fingers working out the knots from his back. He let out a breathy moan when you gently pressed your fingers into the onyx skin at the base of his wings.

"he needed me, and you. Besides your a good mama, if anyone could give him the love he needs it's you..." He lifted himself slightly to settle on top of you better, he's arms wrapping around your waist and his thighs spreading yours a bit more. You took a second to bask in the moment, your fingers tangling and brushing through his hair, a couple of shadows coming to rest on the pillow next to you. You thanked the mother for moments like this. For the times when you both could just hold each other and feel just as loved and seen as if you had spent the night making the house shake.

"Thank you... for understanding, for not being upset. You have every right to be..." azriel mumbled, his voice laced with emotion. He was right, you did have a right to be mad but you weren't. How could you ever be upset with him for being the most loving male in Prythian?! You hugged him tighter and kissed his forehead.

"Do you wanna talk about it? Whatever your thinking about?" You smoothed a hand over his back to try and comfort him. Even though you had been mated for a few years there were still secrets and things he refused to tell you, especially about his excuse of a childhood. You knew the basics, a general idea of how he was treated but he never went into details. You liked to think he wouldn't tell you because he knew you would find his half brothers and rip them to shreds, although You knew in reality it was most likely just to painful to actively try to remember.

"yeah I do, but not tonight. I... we can talk about it tomorrow, I don't want to ruin the night..." He said choosing his words carfully. Azriel easily sat up and flipped you both so you to rest against his side and pulled the covers over you both, the Shadows that had been occupying the pillow previously jumped away I'm a misty puff. You didn't press. You knew he would tell you when he was ready to open up. It made sense, that he past would rear it's ugly head after he brought Rhain home. You left a small kiss on his chest before snuggling into him and letting yourself drift off into your thoughts, the shadows descending over you both is calm wave urging you both into sleep.

Thank you so much for reading and as always I hoped you enjoyed this chapter! If you wanna be added to the tag list please comments or DM me to be added!

Taglist

@romantasyreader28 @tele86 @mulansaucey @jennnsthings @6v6babycheese @mich0731 @starlightandsouls @ohemgeewhat @littlelunatica @icey--stars @paleidiot @jir67 @celestialamore @rcarbo1 @quiet-because-it-is-a-secret @queenoffeysand @suppppp97

[patheticpomegranite]

i go crazy for art of ambessa with a young mel. like i will always cry. i feel like it's easier for people in the fandom to masculinize ambessa and take her with no nuance but i think it's important to remember that she's a mom. that's such an intense and vulnerable experience to go through and you can't take that away from her character. there was time where she held mel and mel looked at her and loved her unconditionally not caring whether her mom was powerful or strong or anything, she's just her mom and she loves her. there's just something so heartbreaking about realizing that ambessa has always loved mel but that didn't stop her from imposing her shitty beliefs onto her and traumatizing her.

feeling like you must traumatize your kid in order to make them strong enough to survive must take such a toll on you but at the same time there is no excuse for that. knowing that it's not that your mom doesn't love you and wants to see you suffer but that your mom does love you and does this because of that, hurts even more.

i really wanted to see a truly happy ending for mel because she is one of my favorites from the show.

i loooove complicated mother-daughter relationships and I have not been as broken by one this much since Everything Everywhere All At Once and I feel like Mel and Ambessa's relationship represented how militaristic culture can also define the mother-daughter dynamic. Mel Medarda you will never not be famous to me. If Mel Medarda has no fans I'm dead.

[cherie-doll]

:o Im curious, how do you think the cod men would react to their kids wanting to be like them or having interest in joining the military?

hmm

༊࿔ Price, Ghost, Soap, Gaz, Roach, Alejandro, Rudy, Phillip Graves, Makarov, Keegan, König, Horangi, Nikto

࿐ Price...

all his life he's had to look out for others, his shoulders have been tense and heavy with the burden of worrying over his team, he's got them through tough moments

and now his children want to do the same? he honestly had hoped those days of distress were over for him, but it seems as if life was barely giving him a break, a moment's peace before it all went back to the way it was

like the loving father he is, he'll speak with them, try to figure out their true thoughts and goals in life, what they think is happiness and how they'd want to achieve it

he won't let them go on ignorantly, they deserve to know the ugly side of it all, but he knows he won't be able to shield them from everything or forever, which is why he must capacitate them to handle life and navigate through the chaos of it

࿐ Simon...

i think y'all remember how he traumatized those children when he told them his life story, you remember how stunned and heartbroken you were when you listened to him explain it you all in one sitting, if it was too much for you to take you know he has no business telling that same story to his kids as well

thankfully he didn't have any of that planned, still he wanted to gently discourage them from pursuing that path, sure he made it out alive but were the injuries even worth it?

they have been blessed with such a great start in life, a loving set of parents who show them what being gentle and kind is, who are willing to lead them through life and protect them from any evil in this world

they don't know how good they have it, and he'd like to for them to sit and ponder a bit more before they reach the brink of diving headfirst or not

࿐ Johnny...

his boys are always asking to go see his friends he still keeps in contact with because hearing only his side isn't enough for them

you can't help but sigh at their recklessness sometimes, they can be too much when they play pretend to be on missions like their father has told them, trying their best to recreate every scene they can remember

you roll your eyes even more when their father joins in, adding in more realistic dialogue and details that make them squeal in delight at how much fun they're having

it's endearing seeing them bond like this, maybe one day they will grow up into what they dream to be, they've got a father they take after in almost every aspect

you know he'd help them reach the stars if they truly wanted, he'll make them believe they can do everything they want to

࿐ Kyle...

he smiles fondly and caresses his daughter's face, "i'm very flattered" he'll say gently so as to not crush her dreams

he knows how much hell he went through, how much worse some of the people he's worked with had it too, and he understood their pain, all of it and tried to help as much as he could

she asks how it was like for him and he doesn't want to sugarcoat any of it because he knows how necessary some details are, still he omits the most gruesome parts

he knows as time passes he'll be able to explain to her in more detail, he'd rather she look up to someone else maybe you, you've been a great parent and partner to him and he couldn't imagine a stronger person than you

࿐ Roach...

he wouldn't want it to be true for anything in the world, this could just be a phase, right? many kids like playing with toy guns and pretending to fight, so he can only hope his kids will grow out of it collectively

the fear and anxiety that ripples through him is too much and you have to hold and calm him down before his mind can spiral too much, "you're thinking too far ahead" you tell him

also, maybe his kids won't get as involved as he thinks they'll be, he remembers the years it took for him to get to where he was, unless they had a strong determination they would lose interest before getting too involved, or at least he hopes

in the end, he learns to accept what may come, they look up to him after all, aren't they only trying to follow what they think is a good example?

࿐ Alejandro...

his kid didn't show much of an interest until they were entering their teenage years, and, as a father, he'd be neutral about it likely, maybe a slight inclination to disagreeing

would sit down and have a long and honest conversation about the topic with his son, he would bring up personal stories that his son hasn't ever heard before

"in the end, it's up to you, mijo" is all he says when he gets up from the chair and leaves his son deep in thought

he may voice his concerns to you and you try your best to listen to your husband, after all he can't help but worry about his kid, just know what whatever path your child decides to take he'll be right there to back them up no matter what <3

࿐ Rudy...

as supportive as he is, he wouldn't want his kids to see all that blood and death, to deal with what he's had to, he knows where his kids will want to reach, they want to be just like him

he sees the good intentions in their little tender hearts and commends them for wanting to help the world, just this isn't the way for them, and when they exclaim and whine he explains with simple analogies to make them understand

doesn't a nurse carry out her duty just as well as a soldier does? should she be ashamed because she's not on the battlefield taking bullets to the chest like the soldier is?

the soldier finds comfort in her, just like how he found comfort in you, how many times he's buried his head into your shoulder when it all felt like too much :((

it's not shameful nor selfish to not want to fight, some problems may be resolved with peace

࿐ Phillip...

either he'd be really proud or would ask if they really wanted that, the "try it out and see if you like it" type, he bets they wouldn't last a second on the job, some just aren't built for it

but in case he does encourage it, you'd probably have a ton of headaches just dealing with the delusions he's putting into your kid's head

he would be trying to build their character and toughen them up, he finds it touching that the kid will want to be like him, well who wouldn't?

would buy the kid their own uniform and everything just so he can take pictures and show it off to his shadows like "one day this kid will be yelling orders at ya"

maybe even take the kid down to the base on days where he'll be doing paperwork and let him run around pretending to be commander

"it's harmless" is all he tells you when you try to hold him accountable for it

࿐ Makarov...

he certainly does not want his children involved in any dirty business, he gets them everything they ever need so they won't have to stain their hands with blood

if anything he tries to hide that double life of his from them, you know how much he cares for them and if anyone found out he even has children much less are out in the open to kill... he'd be destroyed

"it's not something you should do" the advice he gives is more for their concern than anything, there's a lot of stuff he can't tell them even when they demand more information, some things are too much for children to handle

instead he'd like for them to shift their focus on studying or something that won't make them feel guilty down the road, he seeks your support during these times

for he knows what he's worked so hard to hide can be taken away from him in an instant, and these children don't have a clue about it

࿐ Keegan...

he'd say no so fast, but he sees the way his daughter looks at the guns and rifles he has from when he used to fight up on the garage wall, he sees how at the toy isle she picks out a tank instead of a house for her dolls

he's seen how she pulls his old balaclava over her face and look in the mirror when he's passing by her bedroom, how every time they play fight she seems to know where to hit, where is she learning this from?

but she just wants to be like her father who "has saved the world"

he knows he can't stop her from a decision she wants to make but will certainly try and open her eyes more to the truth of it, hopefully she can fully understand by the time she's old enough

࿐ König...

he's been through stuff but he's proud of it, so it shouldn't have been a surprise that his kid will naturally want to follow in that path

he even taught her to fight and stand up for herself since before she could properly walk, she of course wants to be strong like her father

however, he recognizes he used to be weak before he could be tough and an innocent child will surely be swallowed whole by the cruel world

he's had disappointment from not getting what he wants so he's had to be content with becoming the best at what was given

if his child is to face that same world, he'll help her toughen up, to not let a stab at your side bother too much, to learn to prove others wrong

he'll teach her how to fight her way to the top

࿐ Horangi...

he only got into this field because he was leading a terrible life that was going off the rails

and he hopes the love and care that he gives his child won't make them take desperate decisions

on that note, if you currently reside with him in Korea he knows the service will be mandatory, but what if the child has intentions of staying even after the required 18 months is over?

whatever path his kid chooses he will try his best to raise a confident kid who won't throw himself out to the world without a plan

just because horangi didn't have one yet got his life together he advices his child that he still wasted a lot of time

overall, he'd be okay with it

࿐ Nikto...

it's been drilled into him from childhood to be proud of his country and want to serve it one day, however, he realizes it's glorified

it's never how you think it's going to be, and unfortunately he's experienced that gruesome side, it's what left his face and body all torn and his mental health even worse

he won't let his child be pushed into it, sure be useful where you need to be but don't go blindly believing you can be a hero or someone that will be recognized nationally

no one sees the effort or the blood and sweat that you spill and no one will bend to pick it up, they won't see you break under that forcing hand

he'd strongly advice against it

[shapard]

Feather of Fate🕊️

Lucifer x Seraphim!fem!reader

Soulmate arc

You're eating breakfast peaceful (are you?) and Heaven is a big mess

In pieces

Chapter 1 < Chapter 2> Chapter 3

Heaven was a big mess. 

Nothing new. 

Since you’re gone Emily feels all the pressure that was on you. All your responsibility was handed to her like a silver tablet with no refund. 

It was exhausting. And it didn’t help that Sera was also a big mess. 

She never left Emily’s side, almost like a guard dog. 

She lost her daughter because of her dirty little lies. And is scared that Emily would leave her too.

The arch angels aren’t pleased for her doing. She’s not God.

Her Image now like a Hurricanes aftermath.

No one wants to deal with her not even her own daughter Emily. 

Emily was very distant towards Sera. She doesn’t want to be near her, not after what she has done.

Your Mother sent Emily away when you fell. 

She couldn’t be there for you. She wasn’t there when the most painful thing happened to you. 

She felt ashamed, like a failure. 

You always protect her from the vicious laws of heaven. Sometimes even taking her punishments to protect her. 

And when you needed her the most, she wasn’t there. 

She can’t deny that it’s probably her fault that you fell. Taking all her misleads and getting you into trouble after trouble.

So that she can be safe. 

Talking back towards Sera in the court was the final straw. 

Sera could’ve talked to them, but she didn’t. 

She agreed because of her Image. 

To Sera’s surprise, the upper angels weren’t Impressed.

It didn't help at all.

Not even the winners want to talk with her anymore.

…

Lucifer couldn’t believe his eyes. 

You were awake! 

But not in the state he’d hoped. You were covered in your own blood and the floor was all a mess.  Ceramic was soaked in with the golden color of your blood. 

“What happened?” You didn’t answer. 

Somehow, he knew you wouldn’t answer. Falling from heaven can be quite traumatizing. He talks out of experience.

You couldn’t even keep your wings like he did, the pain must be unbearable. You were definitely not used having no wings anymore. 

You were hiding behind a Blanket, Lucifer found it quite cute and adorable how you were hiding from him. 

But it also hurt him.

Ache.

“Are you hurt?” Lucifer asked you, not wanting to scare you away. You slowly peaked above the blanket. You have to say he is quite handsome. 

“I don’t know if I can trust you.” 

The handsome man looked at you and sighed. “I helped you when you fell out of heaven. You’ve been out for a couple of days. I can help you, please let me help.” 

“Why?” Your mere whispers made his heart squeeze. 

He couldn’t find an answer to your question. 

Was he helping you because he knows how it is? 

To get thrown out of your home, getting ripped apart from the elders. Family not even sparing a glance at you. But there was something else why, but he couldn’t put his finger on it.

“I know how you feel, let me help you.” You nod, you don’t have anything to lose. 

You already fell from heaven and live now in hell. Getting thrown right infront of the bus. 

Letting the Blanket fall from your back showing the man your fresh back wound. 

“Again, the back?” He chuckled, “By the way, the name’s Lucifer.” The name rang in your ear. “The Lucifer?” your voice is kind of soar. 

He snapped his fingers and with a sparkling sound a cup of water formed infront of you. Muttering a small thanks, you grabbed the cup pf water and let it slide down your throat. You hummed in approval. 

“I’m Y/n.” His hands hover over your back and he pulled the ceramic pieces slowly out of your back.

“That’s a beautiful name, Y/n.” Your name out of his mouth felt like sweet caramel. You wanted him to say your name again and again.

You smiled a bit and winced at him removing the splinters. After he pulled the last pieces out, he hovered his hand again over your back.

This time his hands started to glow in gold. His hands radiant heat, it was like a warm summer breeze. 

After a while the feeling stopped, you turned around to take a look at Lucifer. 

“You’re Lucifer?” He nods but didn’t look you in the eyes, he felt ashamed somehow. “Indeed I am.” He finally looks back at you and you beamed a smile at him. 

“You don’t look creepy at all.” That surprised him and he blushed slightly at your sudden forwardness. 

“You should rest. We’re going to talk tomorrow.” He patted your head and walked towards the exit. Giving you a final smile, he went back to his couch. 

You sighed and laid down on the lightly soaked blooded mattress. “I should at least try to sleep.”

…

You didn’t sleep well that night. 

Your back was still hurting even after the treatment Lucifer gave you. 

The blood still sticked on your skin making it quite uncomfortable to stand up. You have to take a shower.

The red Sun lighted the room red. A quick reminder that you indeed are in hell. In comparison to heaven was Hell rather cozy. It was warm and more colorful, even though the colors are very vibrant or dark. 

It was exciting. 

It’s been so long since you felt that kind of Emotions. 

Everything in heaven was the same. You must do the same and be like everyone else. You have to work 24/7, and work 9 to 5 or even worse. Not even a single break, not even for you a Seraphim. 

You worked over night almost every day for your Mother Sera. It pained you when you saw her chilling the while day and Emily flying and playing around heaven. It is your responsibility as the bigger Sister. 

Well, was to be exact.

A knock echoed through the silent chamber making you snap out of your thoughts.

A couple seconds later Lucifer came through the door. Peering inside to see if you’re awake.

“I made you some pancakes.” Lucifer nudges his sharp clawed finger into the direction of the kitchen. 

On a table you see a plate with pancakes, Ice cream and a cup of hot chocolate. He sat down on the mattress. 

His pants started to soak in the semi fresh golden blood. He shrieked and sat up looking at his pants. 

“Are you still bleeding?” He franticly searched for any Injuries on your back. “I’m fine. It’s just the blood that spilled on the bed. Sorry for that.” He let out a sigh of relief, “Let me change the Mattress.” 

He held out a hand for you to take. With hesitation you took his clawed hand. With a pull he pushed you upwards, you gasp at how fast he was moving you. 

Your legs felt like jelly, your head started to spin, and it started to get dizzy. He held you tight before you could fell. “I got you.”

Without any second thought Lucifer carried you towards the kitchen. Your cheeks redden at this behavior. 

His touch was striking you like a lightning bolt. It was a warm comforting feeling. His Arm around your waist left a tingling almost sparkling feeling. The feeling almost made you smile like a fool. 

“Thanks.” It was a mere whisper, but Lucifer heard it very clear. The weird feeling on his arm was distracting him immense, though your voice brought him back out of his thoughts. And he smiled.

Lucifer realized how long he was actually holding your waist. Retrieving his Arm rather quickly he coughed out of distraction.  “Just sit over there.”

“Lucifer?” He hummed and looked at you, the way he chewed the food made you giggle slightly.

You smelled pretty bad. You didn’t want to ask him if you could take a shower, but you have to take a shower. His gentle gaze took your worries away and made her ten times more nervous. 

“Can I take a shower?” Lucifer nods hesitant. “Of course, you can.” He laid down his food and took your hands and walked slowly towards his bathroom. 

… Time skip…

The Shower was very relaxing, even though it was kind of creepy to know that Lucifer was waiting behind the door. 

The food was hellish good, heaven could never. 

In heaven it all tasted the same, very blunt and no emotions in it.  

Lucifer took your plate and cramped his sleeves up to wash your plate. You followed his swift movements and how smooth he washes them. 

It amazed you somehow, washing dishes isn’t something Interesting but how he washes them is just different. 

Then you saw it, his mark. Suspicious Identical like yours. Please no. 

Somewhere in Heaven:

Sera sat Infront of a U-shaped table looking up at none other than the arch Angels themselves. “Sera.” A rather deep voice said making her jolt in her seat.

“Michael.”

A/n: I know this chapter is kind of boring but trust me. It’s going to be good.

[winchester-24]

Imagine getting into an argument with Dean

You have been with Dean for just a little over a year. You met when they saved you from a werewolf, and ever since you learned about the things in the dark, you wanted to make sure you could protect someone else as they did for you. Dean and Sam left after that night, but you started to learn about the supernatural, train to fight and self-defense, and eventually began to go on hunts. You ran into the brothers about two months after that night on a hunt for a vengeful spirit. The boys recognized you from your most traumatic night. After the hunt, you went out to a bar with the boys and hit it off well with the older Winchester. You ended up leaving with them and have been hunting with them ever since. Dean and you became official after a few months of being on the road with them, and you couldn’t be happier. You learn Dean had a past with the ladies, and while in the beginning, it made you feel insecure, Dean showed you that he loved you through everything he did, even if he never said it, and those insecurities washed away until this case, at least.

You three were investigating mysterious deaths in South Carolina. The way of death is all over the place, from drowning to heart missing to throat slit. It didn’t make sense, but four occurred in the same area over three weeks. You were at the last victim's house talking to the victim's daughter, who was around your age and Sam’s. Sam was walking around the house, looking for anything that stood out. Dean was talking to the daughter, and you were going through the victim’s computer with the daughter's permission.

“I know this must be very hard for you.” You hear Dean say, and in the corner of your eye, you see him grab the daughter’s arm. You are tense as you don’t want to make it obvious you are watching, but why does he need to touch her to question her? Those insecurities that Dean worked so hard to get rid of started to creep back up. The daughter latches onto the empathy and starts crying, attaching herself to Dean and hugging him while she cries in his chest. He hugged her and began rubbing his hand up and down your back. Something he did to you when you needed reassurance from him. You saw in the corner of his eye that he looked over at you, but you quickly moved your eyes to focus back on the computer in front of you, even though you weren’t comprehending anything on the screen.

The daughter released herself from Dean, letting out an apology. Dean smiled at her and replied

“Don’t worry about it, sweetheart.” Your jaw clenched. The daughter then opened up with more information and said that was all she knew. Dean nodded his head and handed his card to her.

“If you need anything, I mean it; call me.” She nodded and took the card, and Sam walked back into the room. You shut the computer and stood up quickly—maybe a little too quickly, as the brothers looked at you curiously. You gave your condolences to the daughter one more time and curtly exited the house. The brothers looked at each other and excused themselves.

In the Impala, it was quiet until Sam spoke up.

“Did you find anything on the computer?” You didn’t, but it wasn’t because you didn’t know anything for sure; it was because you couldn’t focus on digging.

“No, I needed more time,” Dean spoke up.

“I could have stalled her more if you needed.” You roll your eyes from the back, not realizing Dean was watching you.

“I’m sure you could of.” Sam swallowed, already knowing what this was about and where this conversation was going. Dean’s jaw clenched.

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“You know exactly what that means.” You snapped back at Dean with an attitude, not looking at him but out the window.

“How about you elaborate for me?” Dean barked at you. You rolled your eyes once again.

“I swear to God, you roll your eyes one more time-“

“What, Dean, you’ll what? See that girl again? Rub on her again and call her all these cute little pet names? Go ahead.”

“That’s what this is about? Are you serious?” Anger fills you more as he is about to invalidate how you feel.

“Tell me you were just doing it to get information from her Dean. Look me in my eyes and tell me that.” You snapped, looking at him from the back seat.

“Uh, don’t do that right now; I don’t want to get into an accident,” Sam says quickly, knowing that Dean would do something like that to prove a point while driving. The Impala pulls up to the motel you three are staying at, and you fly out of the car, trying to escape Dean as quickly as possible.

“Oh no, sweetheart, we aren’t done. Get back here!” Dean yells after you. You ignore him and use your key to get into the room. You can’t even shut the door before Dean comes through it.

“She hugged me, crying. What did you want me to do- be an asshole and push her off me? That would have got us the information.” He snapped at you as you turned and looked at him.

“You didn’t have to rub her back, call her sweetheart, or tell her if she needed anything to call you!” You started to raise your voice at him.

“You are taking it out of context! I was trying to comfort her so she would tell us what we needed to know! She was hiding something!”  His voice raised.

“That’s not the only reason!”  You got louder.

“You think?!” He got louder.

“I know, Dean!” You got louder.

“You’re wrong!” He got louder.

“Oh yeah, prove it!” You got louder.

“Because I love you, dammit! I wouldn’t do that to the person I love most!” He yelled as loud as he could.

You went silent.

You stared at him. His chest heaved up and down, and he was breathing hard, trying to keep his cool as best as he could. He looked at you in the eyes.

“Because I love you.” Is all he said again, quieter. You walked over to him and hugged him. He was hiding your face in the crook of his neck. He has never told you that he loved you out loud. It was always shown through his actions. Your heart hammered as your brain replayed what he said over and over. He wrapped his arms around you and held you close, his face against your head. You pulled from his neck and looked at him, still hugging him.

“I love you too.” He smiled a small smile at you.

“You mean everything to me. When you came into my life full-time, I couldn’t look at anyone else the same; you are the only person I want. You turned my whole lifestyle upside down, but I wouldn’t change a thing. I only have eyes for you. Don’t ever forget that.” You nod, not able to form words. He leans and kisses you on the lips. You bring your hands up to his hair and tug a little, earning a groan from him. He deepens the kiss as his hands slide down to your butt. The motel door opens just as he grabs your shirt to lift it over your head.

“Hey, did you guys—OH, okay, never mind, guess you did,” Sam says, red in the face. You two break apart, your face turning red as Sam has never walked in on you two before. Dean looks at Sam.

“Thank you for that, Sam.” You giggle and kiss Dean’s cheek as you help Sam with the bags he is bringing. Your heart is whole, and the insecurities are gone again.

[star-girl69]

Fade Into You

Clarisse La Rue x Fem!AphroditeCabin!Reader

—-

sypnosis: you fell first, but clarisse fell harder. requested by anonymous!

a/n: decided to feed y’all today….. two fics i’m a monster that just creates and creates. this was so funny bc i kept accidentally writing angst and i had to stop myself. they’re allowed to have crushes on each other. it’s ok. this was hard anyways i hope you all enjoy!!

Fade Into You - Mazzy Star

warnings: just so cutesy, swearing, mentions of violence, mentions of blood and injury, soft clarisse i looooovvvvveeeeee you, tell me if i missed anything!!

—-

Your chest heaves. You’ve never ran that fast or that far before in your life. Your satyr protector runs ahead to get the healers, and you crash against some random building- a tool shed, maybe?

You groan, crouching down to clutch at your lower leg sporting a large gash running blood. You don’t remember how it happened. Maybe it was when you fell? You could have sliced it open on an unfortunately sharp stick.

You don’t even want to think about the fact that the stupid monster thing chasing you could have gotten close enough to claw at you.

“Hey, hey,” someone says, crouching down next to you. She’s wearing an orange shirt. Her hair is curly, her eyes are pretty and brown, and oxygen isn’t getting to your brain so she kind of seems like an angel. “Oh, wow,” she mutters, looking at your leg. “One second, ‘kay?”

“Wait,” you say, grabbing onto her forearm. She looks up at you.

“I’m going two steps away, dummy.” She laughs, and you’ll remember that sound for the rest of your life.

She leaves you, and you almost want to cry because you feel so alone. You’ve just been told you’re a demigod, then you were forced to run through the woods, your heart is still hammering and your leg fucking burns.

But she was right. It was only two steps, and she comes back, the door of what must be some sort of storage shutting behind her.

She leans back down and presses a towel against your gash.

You hiss.

“Sorry,”

“You’re not.” She laughs again. More beautiful music in your ears.

“I’m not,” she agrees.

You fall into silence, it’s so dark out, but you can see everything about her so clearly.

“You can stop breathing so heavily,” she whispers, the shouting of your satyr protector getting closer, along with what must be the healers. “Camp Half-Blood is surrounded by a magical barrier. You’re safe here. Well, at least, no monsters are gonna get you.

“O-okay,” you mumble. You aren’t sure if you believe her. You don’t think you believe anything anymore.

The healers push her away, you’re so so tired, and she stands up, dusting off her hands.

“Thank you, Clarisse,” one of the healers says. “We’ll take it from here.”

Clarisse.

—-

The purpose of Clarisse La Rue’s entire existence seems to be to drive you insane.

The way her arms flex when she wields her spear, the way she lifts her shirt up to dab at sweat on her brow; and the way you can see her toned stomach and the faintest hint of abs you would actually kill to touch. The way she smiles, even though it’s never really genuine, and the way she laughs when she’s making fun of someone.

She was the first person you met at camp, and you’re pretty sure she doesn’t even remember it, yet alone know your name.

It was ironic, as the daughter of Aphrodite, to be quietly pining over someone from the distance. And it sucked, but maybe you would just always have this quiet crush on Clarisse, and you learned to take it like you took your breakfast.

Until the start of this summer, when everyone came back to camp, it was alive again, and it all changed. And now you’re fucked.

—-

You smile, watching a few of the younger campers scream about how amazing the lake is. Summer’s just started. It’s so beautiful this time of year. They didn’t have as traumatic experiences as you, no monsters chased them right up to the barrier of camp. The lake is huge and so blue it seems otherworldly- probably because it is.

You slam into something.

It’s an awkward flare of limbs and muttered obscenities, but you manage to keep yourself upright by falling back into a very convenient tree.

“Sorry,” you say, looking up and expecting to make eye contact with anyone but her.

You haven’t been face to face with Clarisse in four years. You mouth snaps shut, and you’re sure you look like a terrified deer in headlights.

She’s frozen just like you.

“W-watch where you’re going,” she hisses, pushing you farther into the tree as she walks past you.

Did Clarisse just stutter?

—-

Clarisse stares at you.

You blush like you’re about to turn into a flamingo.

The cycle repeats.

—-

This year, the Ares and Aphrodite cabins were paired together to share the field for sword practice just before dinner. The sun is hidden by the trees, providing some nice shade as you frown at all the Ares kids sparring like their lives depend on it.

While Aphrodite kids are not the most naturally skilled in fighting, you’re still demigods, and you still have to know how to protect yourselves.

Matty, a Ares child and your sister Tyla’s boyfriend, already sparred three times, winning against his siblings, then sparred with Tyla once; which just ended with her getting bored after a minute and dropping her sword before jumping into his arms.

You watch random people spar. Everyone moves around you, Tyla and Matty are on top of each other next to you on the bench, everyone walks around you to collect their water bottles from the table behind you.

“Aren’t you gonna spar, Y/N?” Tyla asks, fiddling with Matty’s hands.

“No,” you laugh.

“That’s against the rules.”

You know that voice, you hear that annoyingly angelic voice in your dreams.

Clarisse sits down next to you. You can hear Tyla smiling. Only a few of your siblings who can be trusted to keep a secret know about your wretched crush. You’re probably blushing.

“Uh, what?” you say, looking in her direction but not risking actually looking at her.

“You have to spar,” she says, like it’s painfully obvious, kicking out her legs.

“I’ll do it tomorrow,” you shrug.

“Sounds like you’re scared, Y/N,” Matty muses.

You shoot him a bored look. “Sounds like you’re whipped, Matty.”

Tyla is currently in Matty’s lap, her hands in his hair.

“Oh, definitely,” he says, turning towards Tyla with a sweet smile on his face and she coos and immediately attaches her face to his.

“Oh, Gods,” you mutter, turning away from the two of them having borderline sex on the bench.

Clarisse laughs.

You clench your fist, you feel like you’re gonna explode being so close to her and not able to climb up into her lap and kiss her like a woman starved.

“You still have to spar, you know.”

“Are you going to tell on me?”

“Hm, no. I won’t have to.”

You finally look towards her, if only because you’re confused, but she’s looking straight out at the the distance, where a certain centaur is making his way to the fields-

“Oh, fuck,” you hiss, immediately jumping up and scrambling for a sword from the pile behind you.

You turn around, hoping one of your siblings is free so you can spar with them-

The sword is ripped out of your hands.

“That one sucks,” Clarisse says, simply, while you stand there with your mouth open. She rifles through the swords. “Use this one instead.”

The one she hands you does seem a lot easier to hold. Not too heavy, not too light.

How the hell could she tell which one is best for you just by looking at you?

“Matty,” Clarisse says. “Chiron’s coming.”

Tyla and Matty both hop up, giggling at they make their way towards one of the marked circles.

As you’re left there with Clarisse, it suddenly hits you that after four years of simple indifference, she’s talking to you like she knows you. Or like she wants to know you.

You like her too much to question it. You want her too much to be bothered as to why she’s giving you five minutes of her time.

Clarisse walks away. You thought it was going to happen, so your heart feels this sort of heavy that is indescribable, but she turns around.

“Are you coming?” she asks, deadpan.

“Oh. Uh, yeah,” you say, sticking your sword under your arm and cracking your knuckles. With Chiron showing up, she leads you to the marked circle all the way at the edge of the field, the start of the woods, the very last one.

She stops and turns around, this sort of nonchalant but smug look on her face. She reaches forward and bats your hands away from each other with a single swat that leaves you so shocked from the feeling of her skin on hers that your hands fall to your sides.

“Stop that. You’ll hurt ‘em.”

Here, right in front of the trees, the sun shining through the gaps shines off of Clarisse’s tan skin and her bronze armor in a way that makes her look otherworldly.

Clarisse’s that kind of pretty where you just never want to stop staring at her. The kind of pretty where you just want to fade into her and be next to her; the kind of pretty where nothing compares to her but it just watches her too.

Like the sun behind her, it isn’t jealous, it just admires her and shines off her skin.

She’s smirking at you, her knees bending into an offensive position, her spear pointing at you.

“He’s watching,” she taunts, and you’re really not in the mood for a lecture and the loss of dessert privileges, so you copy her.

“I’m not the best-”

She spins forward, spear arcing toward you. You yelp, raising your sword up to block her spear. They slam together.

“You’ll do fine,” she smiles, so smug in a way that makes you want to slap her and kiss her all at once.

“Whatever,” you mumble as she pulls back.

But you feel a little more confident with her praise, launching a surprise attack. She seems a little shocked, but she blocks it, probably a bit closer than normal.

“Feisty,” she murmurs.

“What the hell does that even mean?”

She launches her own attack, more force behind it this time, and it’s harder to stop her, but you do, you push her back.

“It means you’re exactly like I thought you were.”

You frown, because what is she even saying, but she launches another attack, smiling brightly as you block it, her eyes never leaving your form.

It’s a blurry of your heartbeat in your ears, her smile, the clash of her spear and your sword, the rest of the field coming to life with the sound of metal on metal, wins and losses.

Your arm is growing heavy.

But you keep your eyes open, blocking her attacks and waiting for an opening you’re not sure will ever come.

Finally, she reveals her side, and you swing, your sword clanging as it hits her metal armor.

She looks down at your sword and then you.

When she looks up again, it’s never the same.

—-

“Did you let me win that first day?”

You’re in the woods with her, so many months after that first day, and it all still feels like it was yesterday. You’re laying on a blanket on the soft grass, facing each other, limbs tangled together and her arm around you.

“Hm?” she says, slightly sleepy.

“When we sparred?”

“Oh,” she smiles, yawns. “Yeah, I let you win.”

You gasp and hit her arm.

“Clar, that’s, like, horrible. Our relationship was built on lies.”

You’re the only person allowed to call her that.

She frowns. “It wasn’t. What are you talking about?”

“I was gloating over you for months, and you let me-”

“Okay, but, you still won. I just helped you a bit. That’s what a good girlfriend should do.”

“You were not my girlfriend then.”

“Yeah, but you wanted me to be. For how long? Four years?”

You roll yours eyes. “You bumped into me once and then became obsessed with me.”

She smiles against you as she kisses your forehead.

“Who wouldn’t?” she snorts. “Not my fault you bumped into me in a way no one else ever has, angel.”

“My love language is just bumping into people, I think.”

“Then you can’t bump into anybody but me. Or else I’d kill them, probably.”

“A true romantic.”

She wraps her arms around you, muscles flexing as she pulls you on top of her.

“Only for you, angel,” she says, eyes falling closed again. “‘M cold, be my blanket.”

“Aren’t you supposed to be all rough and tough?”

“Can’t be with you,” she yawns. “Love you too much. Now shush. I’m gonna fall asleep.”

“You big baby,” you mumble. “Big bad Clarisse needs to fall asleep with her girlfriend and get her full eight hours or else she’ll go on a rampage.”

“Damn right.”

Clarisse is the type of pretty that just makes you wanna fade into her. And you do, in the light of the rising moon, the light of the fading sun. You fade into her.

—-

y/n when clarisse helps her on her first day: wow, an angel 😍😍

clarisse when y/n bumps into her: wow, an angel 😍😍

ALSO CLARISSE CALLING Y/N ANGEL???? I THINK I’VE FOUND MY NEW OBSESSION Y’ALL

—-

taglist:

@lvrue @t-wylia @laughingcheese037 @kroumi @urdeadpoet @colezb @rey26 @harmzilla @elliewilliamsbae @amberfreemansburntface @kyuupidwrites @neverwaakeme-up @shark1008 @liballer @heyimadison @nvirskies

[romaevelizz]

Bittersweet ˖ ࣪⊹

Younger!Aemond Targaryen x Cousinblk!reader

sum: Her and Aemond have always been close, but the death of Lady Y/ns mother Laena has closed her off, his betrothed not as bright as she once was. More than one loss is made that day and some is gained.

warnings: reader n aemond are aboout 15-16 ish(non cannon age at time but whatever. cannon violence, sneaky kiss ‘ GASP’, Older sister y/n scolding her sisters and nephews, umm if you don’t like they way i write bc i will be making Aemond a wee bit of a victim srry not sorry the mf needs a therapist and a happy crazy wife ‘that’s what princess y/n is!’. not profread- if you come back in a few days i bet thing will be better trust😭

It was strange when he saw her she wasn’t smiling, not even an offer of a small one. His betrothed face was sad and tired, her face slightly puffy from her crying. There was nothing behind her eyes and it hurt him to see her like that. To see her so taken by grief.

A Loss was never easy by any means, and the princess had just suffered a great one. Her mother, Princess Y/n was in all ways her mother's daughter a strong-headed soon-to-be woman-grown, but like her father, she had a mouth that may have gotten her in trouble a mouth her mother's lips twitched upward when she was a girl. Y/n was the Anger and grief, the understanding Leana couldn’t be. Soon saw Y/n as wild, but she was a girl who spoke her mind and put dozens of lords to shame.

Y/n was Leana's girl, Aemond watched the kindness of Leana through herself. through words, acts, and touch. The gentleness Leana displayed to her daughter came through as she tended to Aemond and even his older brother's wound. A snarky smile on her lips as Aegon tried to get on with her only for her words to fight right back playfully as his. The way Leana would kiss her daughter's forehead before the night, Aemond had experienced it. The hand holding the praising words, the jesting and teasing words always a grin upon her dark features.

How the night of his thirteenth name day he came to her visiting chambers. How when he couldn’t get words out of what had happened she shushed him as he sought comfort after his traumatic event. how when he pushed away from her at first she didn’t try to continue close to him but wanted for him, waiting till he fell into her arms his soft sobs discomforting as he told her what had happened.

He had never felt unsafe or unwelcome by her like he did with her sisters and their nephews, How she’d go out of her way to call them off when they picked at him. She always told them “He’s only Human, only one can take abuse and hate like this for so long till something in them snaps. Must believe Nephews when that day comes I won’t step in between you and him.”

She stood by his side loyaly as his betrothed as did he. And nothing could change that, not the respect they had for one another nor the trust they built.

It wasn’t long before he found himself by her side, standing by one’s side they were always told. He did as such. The words were being exchanged as her mother was put to rest the sound of the waves crashing along the cliff side, the wind loud. His eyes glanced over to her his eyes watching her face carefully. The way her lip trembled as she choked back tears her Light eyes reddening as she kept to herself. Then her hand, the coldness of her hands causing him to wince slightly, but never pull away. Her fingers intertwining with his, she shakes against him, the princess's shoulders soon shuttering as she sighs out a small cry. Aemond held her hand tightly letting her know he was here, her face soon falling into his shoulder as she cited softly.

“They took her from me, the gods took my mother from me..” she cried her voice hushed.

Aemond head fell a top of hers in a comforting manner, his sister Helaena comforting her as well with her hand on her arms carefully her head resting on the back of her shoulder.

It angerd her when her father chuckled such a inappropriate time, his wife her mother was being out to rest and he laughed. Her grip on Aemond tightened for a moment, but released he could see it in her eyes that she didn’t have the strength to speak up now. Or even at all..

The night grew late as sympathies were given to her Aemond at her side as she held his arm close her nails digging into his arm. She was over it, being told her mother was a good woman and taken too soon. Aemond bit his lip a moment “We could always retreat to the shore or your chambers take Ser Maliki and Khalil with us..” he whispered down to her. Silently she nodded.

“Ser Maliki, Ser Khalil The prince and I wish to go down to the shore, you are to accompany us,” she spoke softly to her guards.

With one hand holding his arm the other in his hand they went down, the two guards following behind a bit. Aemond didn’t try to talk to her quite yet, he wanted her to talk to him when she was ready, they left because she didn’t want to talk. All he needed to do right now was let his warmth comfort her.

“My grandmothers asked me to stay..” she spoke softly her face pressed against his shoulder.

He looked over at her “Here in Drifftmark?”

“mmhm my sisters may stay but gods know my father's gonna fly off and do something crazy..” she muttered her hands playing with his fingers as they continued to walk.

“What if you came with us?” He asked, “I understand we’re not to be wed for another 3 years but something in me tells me, if you don’t I may not see you till those years are up..”

Her eyes met Aemonds watching his face as his brows frowned “I find that doubtable, Your father would make sure i could come and see you. Your mother would have me live in her chambers all these years if she could.” she spoke her lips twitching as she jest.

He laughed softly as she took a seat on the sand coming next to him leaning her weight onto him “My mother does like you,”

“Her favorite son is actually happy and getting the attention she can’t quite give him as she wished.” Y/n hummed.

“You think of me her Favirote?”

he watched her as she nodded “That women would do anything for you, I watched her bully her else’s after she caught him making cruel jest towards you.”

Aemond smiled lightly hearing that. he felt as she moved her head now laying in his lap, looking down he truly saw how her beautiful features had been ruled against my sadness, she looked discolored not as warm, the bags under her eyes heavy and tired, the small tear marks that dusted her melanin skin. Aemonds fingers gently brushed her silver curls out of her face “Let me see you..” he said in Valyrian his voice not above a whisper.

“I’m a mess, i look and feel disgusting.” her words just as quiet as his.

“Don’t say such a thing, you look beautiful..”

“tierd, but truly gorgeous.”

that what did it his snarky remark put a small smile on her face, he heeled watching as she rolled her eyes. “Wow really, me tired.” she she sat up, her hand on top of his thighs her face close to his a small grin on her face.

Aemond watched as her eyes went form his to the men behind her, “what-“

“they’re turned away..” she whispered, her face closing in her lips softly brushing his.

he closed his eyes backing up a bit, not as if they hadn’t shared a kiss before but, “We’re out in the open, what would they make of if we kissed before our wedding?”

“maybe they’ll marry us sooner.” she answers simply.

Aemond pushed himself up his had holding her face “You’re grieving, i am not a man who takes advantage of one’s vulnerability…”

“Aemond you’re..”

“my Betrothed, we must’int..” he spoke gently, theyer eyes never leaving one another’s.

she nodded in his grasp “Apologies..” she spoke her forehead falling to his, his eyes closing with hers.

“no need..”

he felt her shutter in his hold a small sniffle, “What am I going to do without her Aemond, she supported me through and through her.” she cried softly.

“and she’ll continued to, with the gods. With me, I stand by your side remember? through and through i shall stand by you.” he responded. His words are full of sincerity.

He pulled back his lips meeting her forehead.

“Can i introduce you to an old lady..” she spoke..

he pulled away a questioning look on his face. “What do you mean?”

“i think it’s time you get your dragon. And if she doesn’t try to kill us think of it as a very early wedding gift.” she said standing up, pulling him up with her.

She took him wher Vhagar and Cannibal laid, Two old dragons that always found the company of one another. Two Dragons that rode together with mother and daughter maybe now, Husband and wife.

Aemonds hand held her tightly as they came over the hill Vhagar Sleeping but Cannibal was awake, His attention was quickly brought to them. Y/n put her finger to her mouth to shush him as he grumbled, they walked down to him first Y/n touching the black beast her head falling into his “You should rest sweet boy, there’s no need for you to worry.”

He only huffed but as she pet him he let out a hyena like giggle, it scared Aemond a bit her dragon giggling so menacingly. “He dose that when he’s happy, irritated, or just enjoying himself,” she said looking over to Aemond.

look as if he may piss his pants, a toothy grin came from the princess as she turned back to her dragon “Perhaps the old lady is ready for someone new in her life hm?”

Cannibal sighed lifting his head a louder grumble coming from him awakening Vhagar her letting out and irritates growl. Y/n looked over to Aemond, “Go ahead just as you’ve done before.” she encouraged him.

And so he did after almost getting smoked to ashes Vhagar was his, without a second thought Aemond climbed on top. Stupid yes but she soon followed behind him just incase he fell from her, but at last. The two of them flew in the night sky together. They’d laugh as their dragons danced together, in the night. Aemond had never been so overjoyed, years of trying to claim a dragon, and one of the oldest the queen herself is now his, flying next to her king The dragon eater himself, and his soon-to-be bride.

Their bond grew deeper because of their dragons that day.

But not all good things come free, even to a prince a dragon like that comes at a cost. Y/n had stuck back a little longer to pretty much biker with her old man, the dragon sassing her. but this time back got Aemond cornered. Jace, Luke, Baela and Rhaena, she could hear the echoed screams to the five, her feet started running.

The four now ontop of him beating as him like some ally dog. “Get off!”

“He Claimed Vhagar! she was for me!” Baela screamed as you pulled her off of him.

“For you?! Don’t be so selfish sister Vhagar was never yours to claim!” She spoke to her sister before going to the others.

Jace had pushed her back his elbow connecting with her face, a small cry of pain came from her, Rhaena quickly goin to her as Aemond pushed off the two boys. His anger growing as he saw the blood drip for her face. Pushing Luke of he got to Jace.

“Aemond Enough! Please!” she spoke standing up moving towards them, pulling aemond off him with struggle Luke came out of nowhere.

a dagger in his hand, through Aemonds face, and through her collar as Luce hand came down she had gotten in the way simply. Aemond fell quickly the kings guard yelling as he went to Aemond.

“Princess,-“

“Aemond! Luke what did you do! why did you do that!” she yelled her brows frowned. The only though going through her head was going that he wouldn’t die. She watched at the Lord commander picked the prince up huring him inside.

“Y/n?! Aemond! oh, gods what has happen?!” Alicent demanded as she rushed towards the two of them; Viserys coming slowly behind her.

“Dear girl your blessing yourself.” Viserys spoke.

“it’s nothing dear uncle, Aemond is the one who needs to be seen quickly..” she assured, but in reality she was still bleeding form her nose lightly but still and her collar bled quite well aswell.

the room was filled crowded as the maesters sttiched Aemonds eye the boy crying in bad as it happened his mother by his side holding his hiding him as she whinced. Y/ns Grandmother by her as her collar was stitched closed aswell, a rag up to her nose for the bleeding there. The maester working quickly and efficiently at the both of them, The yells of Viserys demanding what happend for the guards; the Lord Commander; Khalil, Maliki aswell as Ser Cole they stood under strong interrogation as well.

Aemond had lost his eye, but thank the gods he’d heal, Y/na eyes met his screaming around them trining dull as he asked “Are you alright?”

Is she? He lost and eye for gods sake, his mouth mouthing ‘I’m sorry’..

The princess looked at him clueless sorry? Sorry for what he hadn’t done anything wrong to her hunderatanding ‘i’m sorry i could protect you.’

no.. that not. “tis not your fault Aemond; please..” she whispered shaking her head her brows frowned.

She had stayed seated across from Awmond as her father and Rhaenyra entered, her grandparents moving to Baela and Rhaena. Rhyaenys kissing her head before she got up.

“Who did this?” Rhaenyra asked Luke.

“They attacked me!” Aemond yelled sitting up.

“He attacked Baela.”

“pushed her off me” he scoffed, warning a disapproving glare from Y/n from the fact he’d put hand on her sister.

“He stole my mother dragon!”

“Enough,” Viserys demanded, but they continued to argue around him.

“Stole?” Y/n scoffed, “I was the one that lead him to her Baela! He didn’t take her from you! she was never yours to claim and you know that sister!”

Baela glared at her older sister but soon look at the ground.

“He was going to kill Jace!”

“Because he came a me first All of you did! Joined together and bead me like so stray dog in an ally!” Aemond yelled in defense.

“Luke Cut Y/n aswell needing for her to be stitched, and Jace Elbowed her in the face!” Aemond sat up further his mother ushering his to sit back.

aemond other eyes was heavy and he saw yes he was out of it he had lost so much blood the pain he mush be in must be unbearable. “Enough!” Viserys yelled once more.

“He called us -”

“SILENCE!”

The room quickly went quiet. “he called us bastards..”

Rhaenyra stood for a moment stood to put her boy behind her, her eyes meeting y/ns only to quickly look at her father.

“Aemond..” he spoke the echo of his cane being heard, “I will have the truth of what happened… Now.”

A small scoff could be heard from Alicent her hands planing themselves on Y/ns chair “What else is there to hear?” she asked a heavy frown on her face. “Your Son, Your son and niece have been maimed. Her son is responsible for it.” she spoke.

“ Ot was a regrettable accident,” Rhaenyra quickly defended, yet her voice still sounded shaken.

“Accident?” Y/n spoke, “Me yes, i was in the way but Aemond! Cousin your son ment to kill him..!” she voiced in disbelief her voice it’s self shaken yet stern.

“Daughter.” Daemons spoke, letting her know to not interject with her righteousness as he would say.

Alicent looked from Y/n to them angered “You mean to Silence your fighter as she speaks the truth? As she defends her future husband?” Alicent spoke her head falling shaking her head.

“ The Prince Lucerys brought a blade to an ambush. He ment by all means to kill my boy!” she spoke angerly her hands falling to her hair in frustration.

“it was Jaces dagger your grace..” y/n spoke up softly.

“Jaces? Is that right sweet girl?” she asked her tone encouraging her to speak up.

“Don’t sit there and claim my daughter like she’s your own.” Daemon hissed.

“Quiet!” Viserys said to his brother.

Rhaenyra was quick to speak up on her part “Ot was my sons who were attacked and forced to defend themselves.”

“Vile insults were levied against them.”

Viserys looked over and questioned “What insults?”

“The legitimacy of my son’s birth, was loudly to question.”

Y/n groaned that what the defense was? Disrespectful yes; but to draw a dagger at to mean to kill? They continue to go back n forth the king soon questioning those who were there and even she could not lie he had said it. Viserys asking Aemond where he heard such a lie his eyes moving twords his mother yet answers Aegon. Now Aegon was getting yelled at, only for the prince to be a smart ass.

“This is insufficient.” Alicent said hurriedly to her husband, The King turning to her to hear the words she spoke. “Aemond has been damaged,  permanently; my king. ‘Goodwill’ cannot make my boy while once more!” she cried.

“I know, Alicent, but you mush understand i cannot restore his eye.”

She groaned frustratedly “No; Viserys! Because it has been taken from him!”

“What would you have me do?” he growled.

Alicent stood up straight “There is a debt to be paid,” she declared, the room falling still. “I shall have her son’s eye in return.”

The scream of the boys and Rhaenyras voice raising, Alicent getting Cole to move but him being shut down. Alicent being shut down. She wasn’t having it, Y/n thought that if in this moment it was her or one of her sisters who lost an eye her mother would be the same. The rage of a mother was different to mans. Watching as Alicent grabed a dagger heading towards them Rhaenyra swiftly grabbing her.

Hushed words being exchange twords the two.

“Exhausting, wasn’t it?” She spoke up. “Hiding beneath the cloak of your own righteousness.” she whispered.

“But now they see you as you are.”

The room went quiet as Rhaenyra was cut by her grace. The night couldn’t just come to an end could it?

Y/n watched Aemonds face a satisfied smirk on his face as he spoke “Don’t mourn me, Mother.” His eyes moving for her to his mothers, “It was a fair exchange you could say.. I may have lost an eye but i gain a dragon.

“The queen herself,” Y/n interjected. “Vhagar and Cannibal shall ride together once again.” The princess said keeping eye contact with Aemond as he leaned back.

“We shall ride together.” he spoke softly yet confidently.

The princess smiled; as did he. Oh he couldn’t wait till they married, nor could his mother. Because she could see the side you’ve fallen on. You Trusted Alicent as well as respected her, Rhaenyra had snuck away with her father after the death of her own mother. It take a lot to respect her and Daemond again. Saddening isn’t it?

More so a Bittersweet taste in their mouths; no?

[samitostuff]

ART DUMP ART DUMP ART DUMP ART DUMP ART DUMP ART DUMP ART DUMP ART DUMP ART DUMP ART-

a little angst, otherwise it wouldn't be a DC AU, ofc

in this drawing, i was thinking about p&f reader's arrival at wayne mansion and how alone she must have felt since no one really cared to spend time with her and, if we go the route where her mother died, she just went through a traumatic event and has literally no one to support her through her grief

and I can even see people around her just brushing off her feelings, since she was adopted by a rich family, so it doesn't matter if she lost someone important for this to happen, she should be grateful that she isn't in a worse situation yadda yadda

in this one I was just having fun with the idea of the crossover between gravity falls and this au, which is a brilliant one! I literally can't stop giggling while thinking about how dangerous, big, incredibly bizarre and probably traumatizing adventures these three would get into

(and if you saw what I did there, you did it, If you didn't, you didn't)

ohohohohohohoho this one

I kept thinking about p&f reader helping this alternate version of Batman solve the vampires case while stuck in their dimension, and then waddling away as soon she's done with it and still making It in time for dinner

I just hold this scenario very dear to me

I might move this one to digital, I still don't know if it's worth the sleepless nights I'll probably have, but we'll see...

I also remembered our our lord and savior @yanmuffins mentioned once that these two versions of damian were going to end up fighting once because of p&f reader and that information just stuck in my brain in a way I just can't get rid of it

aside from that, maybe I should make vampire!reader with a mullet, I feel this would make her hotter-

It will probably never happen, but imagine if jon manages to confess and it ends up being reciprocated? or p&f reader just found out some very important things about herself, like an allergy or smth

I couldn't do an art dump without tim being paranoid about perry, sorry, it was stronger than me

more crossovers, mORE, MORE, MORE

(and again, if you saw It, you did it, If you didn't, you won't)

It doesn't look like It, but the thing in the ground is a book... the journal kinda book

and last but not least, the p&f reader in the vampire!reader dimension, but she got yoinked outta the mashine she builted by her own father who immediately recognized the extremely intelligent and problematic genius in her blood, which was all the fucking confirmation he needed to confirm that she was, infact, his daughter

the fifty seven hours without sleep didn't help his case either-

[quack-quack-snacks]

Time Will Tell - Chapter 1.05

My Time Will Tell Masterlist

My Cha Hyun-su Masterlist

My Navigation and Masterlist

The Time Will Tell Glossary

Warnings: Anxiety? Word Count: 1,815

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The worry and anxiety about your siblings and father got worse with each minute. It was fine in the beginning, knowing they should be safe inside your apartment, but with every growl you heard outside the apartment walls, the more the dread in your gut sank like quicksand. 

Watching Yi-kyung and the man in his military uniform as they carried the man who was attacked by the monster into a separate room so as to not constantly traumatize the residents made you feel sick with fear. 

Not for yourself, but for all the people in the lobby with you. Fear for Yi-kyung and the boy you learned was named Eun-hyuk, no matter how little you knew them. But most of all, fear for, of course, your family. 

It was the pleading of the desperate mother in the lobby with you that was the last straw for you. 

“My daughter isn’t back yet!” The woman protested as the residents started to barricade the gate, putting whatever they could find in front of it to make up for the wall it lacked. “What are you doing? You can’t block this! If anything happens to Min-ju, it’s all your fault!”

You stopped from where you were dragging a medium-sized dry-erase board you found in the management room and looked at her. Your face remained blank but your eyes showed everything. Eun-hyuk just looked at the mother, his own face blank of any emotion. 

“Block it,” he told everyone. The mother looked back at him with shock and a hint of betrayal. 

“Please wait,” she told the two beside her before running over to another two residents dragging over an arcade game machine and trying her best to stop them. “I said wait!” She pushed the one closest to her out of the way and opened her phone to show Eun-hyuk the tracking app she had on her phone. “She’s here!” She pleaded with him. “I can go get her quickly and come back! Open it, please!” 

You sympathized with her emotional state but couldn't think of anything you could do to help. 

“I can’t do that,” Eun-hyuk answered the woman before grabbing onto the machine where she had pushed the other man to help move it over. She pushed him again, her expression becoming one of more anger rather than just stress.

“And who are you? Do you know who I am?”

“I have to keep this place safe,” he told her. 

“There’s no way you can know that’s actually her, too,” you supported him, slowly starting to drag the whiteboard over again. “She could have dropped her phone, and you would just be going out there blindly.”

“Then that’s my decision to make!” She screamed at you. Eun-hyuk grabbed onto the machine again, starting to pull at it while the woman fought against it. “Please, stop it. Stop!”

Suddenly, everyone’s phones started to go off, buzzing with the same type of alert you’d get if a natural disaster were to occur. You weren’t entirely sure if this disaster could be considered ‘natural’ with the way the monsters looked outside, but you decided not to dwell on it.

“It’s working,” the boy wearing a light green shirt over a black and white striped undershirt said. You’d come to learn his name was Jae-hwan. He was the same one who opened the door for you the first day you moved back into the apartment complex.  

Everyone, safe for you with your broken phone, pulled out their devices and started looking at the alert. You moved to Eun-hyuk’s side and peered over his shoulder to look. He moved it so you could see more easily. 

The alert read: 

EMERGENCY DISASTER

[MINISTRY OF THE INTERIOR AND SAFETY] DISASTER ALERT: ANYONE SHOWING ABNORMAL SYMPTOMS SUCH AS NOSEBLEEDS, BLACKOUTS, OR SUDDEN AGGRESSIVE BEHAVIOR MUST BE IMMEDIATELY QUARANTINED. 

“Is it an epidemic?” You heard one of the residents say, though you couldn’t place which one it was. You heard people talking but couldn’t tear your eyes off Eun-hyuk’s phone screen. 

You could hear sobs as they bounced off the walls and echoed around the room, and you could feel the fear radiating off everyone around you. It filled the air like a thick smoke and did nothing to help you deal with your own emotions. 

“Are you okay?”

It took you a moment to realize that they were talking to you. It took you even longer to raise your eyes from the screen and to look into the calm, brown eyes of Eun-hyuk. 

You tried your best to smile but it was little more than a slight tilt of your lips. “Y-yeah. I think… I think I just need a minute.”

You stumbled over to a bench, the same one you helped clean Yi-kyung’s wounds on, and fell onto it heavily. You brought your knees up to your chest and plopped your chin on top of them, staring mindlessly into the void as you tried not to think of every possible bad outcome that could happen to your family while you weren’t with them. 

“Let’s all go home,” you suddenly heard Jae-hwan say after a while of everyone sitting around in silence. He had just been pacing back and forth until then. “What are we doing sitting here?”

“Won’t the rescue squad come?” The shorter man with glasses and a dark teal shirt, Seung-wan, asked him, his previously anxiously bouncing leg stopping. 

“Do you not see this? Huh?” He asked somewhat condescendingly. “I think we’re all fucked.”

“Our country won’t go down like this. It won’t,” Seung-wan tried to say with conviction, but the wavering in his voice betrayed his lack of confidence. “Right, Mr. Military Man?”

The ‘Mr. Military Man’ in question snapped his head over and stood up straight when called upon. “Uh… Yes. You’re right,” he said. You scoffed in response, only receiving a quick glance from the residents but otherwise being ignored. “If you stay calm and wait-”

“I can wait at home!” Jae-hwan screamed in response. 

“Oh!” The taller man who hung around the loud, short man exclaimed. “There must be an emergency shelter nearby. Right?” He suggested. 

Jae-hwan rolled his eyes in frustration. “We don’t know where.”

You blocked out the rest of the conversation, your head throbbing from all the arguments and yells. It got even worse when some of them started heading towards the stair doors, intending to go up only to be blocked by a few of the other residents. You rubbed your temples and looked at the clock on the wall to see what time it was. 

11:47

It barely felt like it had been five minutes, let alone more than two hours. You don’t know where Eun-hyuk wandered off to, but he was nowhere in sight. The thought had you feeling a sliver of fear traveling up your spine but you knew he could take care of himself, as he had proved earlier in the night. 

A sudden banging on the door and the silencing of the yells caught your attention and you stood up quickly. You watched as everyone backed away from the door in fear when the handle started to turn and quickly tried to look around for something to defend yourself and the people around you with. You came up with nothing just in time for the door to burst open and reveal-

A man?

He looked normal, besides the burn mark on his right cheek, but you didn’t think that made him look any less normal or… attractive even. He had on some light brown shiny khakis along with a beautifully decorated button-up shirt that made you wish you had something like it. A blazer that matched his pants was gripped tightly in his hand. It was only after a second of him standing in front of everyone that you noticed the blood on his right shoulder. 

“What are you looking at?” He asked, scanning the faces of the people surrounding him. He turned to the right and walked a few steps before you, and the people in the circle realized the blood on his shoulder came from a bite mark. He stopped in his tracks when he saw the barricaded state of the gate, sighing softly in annoyance as Seok-hyeon, the older loud man who owned the shop of the building, yelled at him to stop. 

“Byeong-il,” Seok-hyeon said to his companion. 

“Yeah?”

“Check him. Go and check him.”

“What, me?”

They argued back and forth for a bit as you got up from your seated position and wandered toward the man to make sure he was okay. You were stopped by a familiar presence and hand.

You looked up at Eun-hyuk but he wasn’t looking at you. Instead, he was looking cautiously at the newcomer as Byeong-il went to check the wound. You only looked away from him when you heard the sound of a taser and the thump of a body on the floor. 

“I got him! You saw me, right?” Seok-hyeon said nervously, still holding the taser with caution. 

“Why would you do that?” You asked him, pulling yourself away from Eun-hyuk’s grip and jogging to kneel beside the passed-out man on the floor. You somewhat registered the other newcomer who came in through the doors but focused your attention on the first one. “He didn’t even do anything!”

“Haven’t you seen any movies? The bitten one is always the one to destroy the group!” Seok-hyeon explained like you were stupid but you gave him a look of disbelief. 

“Those are just fucking movies! This is real life! Don’t base your knowledge off of fictional situations!”

The man pushed you away and you fell backwards while they started to drag the man into a separate room. You watched silently, conflicted about how you should feel about what they were doing. 

The opened door tempted you to go back upstairs, back into your home, and reunite with your family so you could fight this together. You didn’t even realize you were walking towards it until the same gentle grip from before latched onto your wrist and pulled you back. 

“It’s too dangerous to go. You need to stay down here,” he told you when you slowly raised your gaze to look at him.  

“My family is up there, though. I need to find them, they… they could be in danger,” you protested, your voice breaking before you fixed it. 

“Wouldn’t you running in just mean you would be put into danger too? They’re in your apartment, right?” He asked and you nodded. “They should be alright as long as they stay there, but you need to keep yourself safe too. So stay here.”

You stood there for what seemed like ages, contemplating his words against your raging anxiety. Eventually, you gave a slight nod and moved away from the door. 

He closed it soon after.

[nanoland]

i actually don't mind the 'having sex in the cell in which your little sister was imprisoned for weeks minutes after she escaped and, on the way out, heavily implied that she was suicidal', because it lines up with what we've been shown about vi and cait this season, ie that they are both kinda thoughtless, careless people who only think about their own pain and their own happiness and that their relationship actively makes both of them even worse.

(which is not a criticism! unless, y'know, the writers wanted me to admire them as heroic protagonists. then it's kind of an issue)

no what BOTHERS me is the bit just before that, when Vi's seeing Jinx in the cell, finding her sister looking Like That, knowing that Jinx's daughter and father both died in front of her only a few months after her other father died, seeing this obviously extremely unwell, traumatized teenage girl being kept in a cage with no one to comfort her

and what does Vi do?

she starts talking about atonement. about how Jinx can redeem herself and the work Jinx must now do.

and ok, never mind that Vi is asking Jinx to atone for attacking Piltover with bombs and NOT asking Caitlyn to atone for attacking Zaun with poisonous gas, never mind that she's still treating Jinx like The Main Problem, all that aside,

now??

now is the time to say this? to put this on the table? your sick sister is locked up and mourning her dead daughter and NOW you're gonna tell her what she's gotta do to prove herself worthy of your love?

this is honestly why i felt nothing during their back-to-back fight later, this relationship feels so hopelessly rotten and the show simply did not put the work in to get me to want to see it fixed

[daenerys-targaryns]

deep diving into the episode three line from rhaenyra, “no one is here for me,” and how if the takeaway from that scene is that rhaenyra is a selfish brat you aren’t proficient enough to do anything past surface-level reading.

in episode one rhaenyra expresses to alicent that she hopes her father gets his son, “for as long as i can recall it’s all he’s wanted.” which leads us (the audience) to understand that while rhaenyra loves both of her parents she feels ostracized from her father (and mayhaps even her mother, to some extent, because of her constant pregnancies) due to his ‘need’ for a son to continue the targaryen dynasty. she is a daughter, only seen as valuable for her womb, which is evidenced that she knows about when talking to her mother. rhaenyra wishes to be a knight and ride off to battle and glory, with aemma giving her a gentle reality check on her lot in life. she does not want to serve the same purpose as her mother.

aemma dies near the end of the episode, with viserys ordering her butchered for the chance that his long-awaited male heir might live. this is a violent and gruesome scene, followed by rhaenyra not even being given the privilege of hearing her mother’s death first. she is instead relegated to members of the small council being alerted, even corlys and rhaenys learning about this before her, she is a silent member on the sidelines. she does not know the extent of what has happened, but she knows that something is wrong.

we have to think about how she learns of her mother’s fate. did otto tell her? did rhaenys? did viserys? did she see her mother’s body ripped open? did she see the bloody sheets left at the scene? was she allowed to hold baby baelon, considering he didn’t die immediately? was she there when he took his last breath? maybe it would bring her some comfort, she didn’t get to say goodbye to her mom. maybe she held him until he passed. did her father offer any explanation? we’ll never know, but these are all such heavy questions in regards to what she experienced that day. she’s fourteen, has spent her entire life watching her mother grieve dead baby after dead baby, losing little bits of herself in the process. it’s no wonder this was a traumatizing period for her, fueling her want (her need) to not be shackled down by marriage and childbirth.

even at her mother and brother’s funeral she isn’t allowed to just grieve, to just be. she has to hold her head high, she has to comfort her father, she has to order their corpses burned. was her father happy for the few hours he had a son? she wouldn’t know, she never will be that for him. how long does he spend wallowing is his self pity? he reprimands daemon for not being there for his niece, but where was he, her father? he banishes daemon, takes comfort from his daughter’s best friend. he finally comes to her, tells her of a great danger rising from the north; from my blood comes the prince that was promised, his will be the song of ice and fire. she hasn’t heard from him in days, a targaryen must be seated on the iron throne to unite the realm against the cold and the dark. her mother is dead, and he has wasted the years since she was born wanting a son. she is now enough, her mother never was.

it has now been six months since her mother's death (murder), and she has been heir the *entire* time. her father won't talk to her, she is still the cupbearer for the small council. lord corlys is angry about a war he says has cost him, the crown will not help. she suggests they use dragons, a show of force against their enemies. her father admonishes her, "it isn't that simple, rhaenyra." he allows the lords at the table to belittle her efforts. the only one appreciative is corlys, "at least the princess has a plan." otto says there are better uses for her talents, she has been heir to the iron throne for six months. she's been given the chance to choose a future kingsguard, she wants one with actual combat experience. the hand is exacerbated, she is firm in her decision. ser criston cole will be the replacement for ser ryam redwyne.

alicent has been visiting her father in his private chambers secretly, corlys wants his daughter to be the next queen. viserys begins openly courting lady laena of house velaryon. rhaenyra and alicent visit the sept, she expresses her worry, her mother has only dead for half a year. the lords seek to replace her, alicent convinces her that she cannot worry about the plots of lords and men, she is the heir, however. why shouldn't she worry? she misses her mother.

she meets with her father, he reassures her, "i loved your mother very much." she apologizes for speaking out of turn at the small council meeting, he tells her she will learn (will he be the one to teach her, though?) daemon has taken a dragon's egg and seized dragonstone, bringing news of his future marriage to lady mysaria. the king means to go himself to stop him, otto will not let him. daemon took baelon's egg. rhaenyra is angry. she reaches dragonstone just after otto's party, she knows they were about to come to blows. she confronts daemon, she is the reason he was disinherited. if he kills her, he'd be done with all this bother. daemon scoffs, walking away from her. he throws the egg whilst still retreating. rhaenyra smiles and leaves. her father is mad once he learns what she's done. she left without his permission, but she retrieved the egg and prevented bloodshed, he should be pleased with her efforts. otto would never have been able to accomplish what she did, he relents.

rhaenys lectures her about the order of things. the realm will never accept a woman ascending the iron throne, but it's different for her. her father is the king, rhaenys' father dies as a prince. her father made the lords of the realm swear obeisance to her, rhaenys never had such a thing. the lords chose viserys over rhaenys at the great council, viserys has not given them a choice. rhaenys is the the queen who never was, rhaenyra is the queen to be. when she is queen she will create a new order, rhaenys warns there will be war (unfortunately she is right).

another meeting takes place between father and daughter. he must take a new wife, someone to help propagate the targaryen line. they are vulerable, to easily ended. rhaenyra understands, it is his duty as king. obviously he will marry laena, the daughter of one of the most powerful houses in the realm and of pure valyrian stock, it is a fine match. alicent is still visiting her father in secret.

her father calls a small council meeting, he means to announce his next wife. rhaenyra is ready, she gave him her blessing (why is alicent here? she never has been before.) her father starts speaking, "i intend to marry... the lady alicent hightower." corlys is enraged, otto is pleased, alicent is anxious. rhaenyra was ready, it has all fallen apart. alicent is her best friend, that friendship dies before her very eyes. she runs from the room.

it has been two years. viserys and alicent are married, and they have a son, with one more baby on the way. the boy's name is aegon, it is his second birthday. he has past his infancy, the lords believe it is only a matter of time until the king names him heir, rhaenyra is well aware of this. the queen visits the godswood where rhaenyra sits. she overrides rhaenyra's authority, commanding the singer to leave. she states the king wishes for her to join them, he wants them to have fun as a family. they do not need her to celebrate his long-awaited son. it is the king's command, she leaves unhappily. alicent wishes for things to be different, rhaenyra knows they never can be.

together they all sit, traveling towards the kingswood. rhaenyra asks after alicent's well-being, viserys reminds her that she will be in this position sooner than late (the same position that killed her mother). "it isn't so bad, the days are long but aegon came quickly and without fuss." the queen states. rhaenyra is hurt, she tries not to show it. the king reminds her she has duties, rhaenyra retorts sarcastically. how long will these duties last, once her father names alicent's son as heir over her? her life will be forfeit before long. no one is here for her.

"no one is here for me." translates to "no one has been here for me. i’ve been alone and angry and terrified for years. i am my father’s heir, but what does that mean? what will it cost? you put me here. daemon put me here. alicent put me here. you have a son now, he outlived baelon and my other siblings. how long until i am cast aside again? made to be some petty lord's wife, made to be a broodmare until it kills me? i don't want to end up like my mother. this heirship is all i have. it will soon no longer be mine. i'm only seventeen. no one is here for me."

rhaenyra is never shown the same amount of grace as alicent for her strifes and anguish in life, for the fact that she too was a child from episodes one through five. rhaenyra might not have been a child bride, but she still spent her life being told she was never enough. she was not a boy, she could not be the heir, her father needed an heir. he kills her mother for it, he ignores her unless she can benefit him. he makes her believe that he will marry laena, only to blindside her by marrying alicent. she realizes alicent has been lying to her for months. her father continues to undermine her throughout the years. he names her heir to spite daemon, which she admits she knows about in episode two. he allows the lords to ignore her. it takes him two years to reassure her he won't replace her. rhaenyra is an angsty teen who has seemingly lost everything and has no support to counter that. she is not upset that no one showed up to a two-year-olds birthday party with her in mind, she is upset that her father continuously overlooks her, that he takes and takes and takes everything from her. he took her mother, he took daemon, he took alicent, he had a son. she has not been able to catch a break due to her father's selfishness. in all honesty, she should have acted out worse, maybe burn everything to the ground. viserys would deserve it, she was far too lenient with him.

[cursecuelebre]

Ancestral Veneration and Why it’s Important

This is going to be a post about a topic that people seem to forget or deem unimportant even fearful about with either good reasons or just never thought about it. I just wanted to mention YOU DO NOT HAVE TO WORK WITH ANCESTORS IN YOUR PRACTICE this blog is mostly for those who are interested in it and not sure what ancestral veneration is.

I’m a pagan and a witch that practices Ancestral veneration in my practice, not around it but it’s definitely a big part of why I practice certain paths. I’ll go in beginner tips, what to expect and the myths, the offerings and the recommendations. But let me go a bit into the importance of Ancestral Veneration and worship in human history since it’s still prevalent today.

Historical importance of Ancestral Worship

Ancestral worship and veneration has been at least one of the oldest religions that humans have ever believed in. Archaeological evidence shows the early humans taking care of their dead and burying them for respect and dignity maybe even courtesy to the deceased. It became sacred to them, imagine back then without fully understanding about the world someone that you spoke and saw now gone, it’s a profound moment one’s life that they must believe that their spirit lives on and they themselves wanted a peaceful resting place. It’s a cycle, many cultures and religions believe that life is a cycle, death is never the “end” rather an end of a journey to a new part of one’s life.

To this day people honor their deceased loved ones, visiting their graves, offering them gifts at their resting places, speaking to them, having their picture on a table surrounded by their favorite flowers, etc. Honoring the dead and respecting the dead is a very revered part of human life and something that we all would like to expect when we’re gone from our living family. Spirits also related or not, the dead as well should be treated with outmost respect and dignity like our ancestors did.

Some cultures like the Romans believed that if the spirits especially ancestral spirits (Lares) weren’t appeased they become angry if worshipped improperly or their will have not be been fulfilled. In Ancient Greek tradition they would place a coin in the mouth for the deceased to make sure their spirits would go into the afterlife safely and less traumatic. Each culture and society had a different way of how the ancestors would live in the afterlife.

Even in the Christian Bible shows the significance of ancestors, there is a reason why genealogies are included in the Bible. How Jewish people revere Abraham as their founding father since he is the first Hebrew patriarch which is very important to them and their religion. How even Jesus is related to David on both sides. Even immediate family is important like Jesus’s mother Holy Mary. In Norse Paganism it’s said that the kings were descend from gods like the Swedish Royal family related to Freyr. In Shintoism it is said that the First Emperor of Japan is related to the Sun Goddess Amaterasu. Japan and other many East Asian countries have a strong relationship and traditions regrading Ancestors.

Why Ancestral Veneration?

Ancestral Veneration is generally taken outside of paganism and witchcraft a very sacred thing for families, they can heal, they can come together, grieve together, reminisce together especially if they knew that person in life. But also asking the deceased loved ones for guidance and protection, to help their family in life whom they love the most. Plus this can help especially if you are into past life regression, we reincarnated with our ancestors many times and they have been able to see us in their time and now. It can be really insightful to understand of who we were in those lives.

Whatever legacy they left behind that you admired from them is continued for generations to come as well as heirlooms, a mother passing down her sentimental items to daughters or their children alike it’s a remembrance of what they were known by as well.

“Cows die, family die, you will die the same way . I know only one thing that never dies: the reputation of the one who’s died.” Havamal, Stanza 77.

If you’re going into paganism or witchcraft or both that are related to your ancestry. Your ancestors are the best teachers and mentors especially if they also have been in these specific practices and traditions. If you want to learn Seidr for instance a magical practice rooted within Scandinavian traditions and you have said Scandinavian roots you can contact a ancestor that practiced it in life and willing to help and teach you. What’s unfortunate about ancestral veneration looking down upon for many centuries making people turn away and against the practice is that it’s said that spirits can become lost if they aren’t being honored or remembered that makes them fade and lost.

Five Myths about Ancestral Veneration and what to expect. This is not going to be sugarcoated, I’m being honest and this what I’ve experienced in my own practice and how many others have experienced as well. I would add on if I forgot anything but these are most common misconceptions I have heard. The red are the myths if you are wondering.

Myth #1: All ancestors on the other side have my best interest and support all what I’m doing This is a common misbelief, now there is ancestors that will support you no matter what and your actions. But if you’re a pagan and a witch there is going to be Christian ancestors who won’t support you at all. Their human spirits with still human functions and beliefs. Not to say you can’t communicate but set your intentions and boundaries before meeting them, some will tolerate and some will make their opinions and beliefs known possibly even try to convince you. I know it sounds like fear mongering but it’s to what you would expect. This doesn’t mean you cannot make contact or venerate them because of it. It’s a choice that is a two way street, even spirits in the other side have freewill just like we do.

Myth #2: All Ancestors are well in spirit No, not exactly, when humans on earth do horrible things or experience horrible things it will take affect in the spirit world no matter what. Keep in mind time works very differently in the other world that it will take centuries for those who are healing to fully recover and those to actually realize their problems, messed up life on earth if they choose to recognize it. Again as I said just humans in the physical world human spirits also have free will and choices.

Myth #3: Only Human spirits are ancestors Nope commonly yes when we think of Ancestors we think of human beings that lived either with us or before us. But this isn’t the case, pets for instance that became our beloved family members and part of our inner circle are our ancestors. My cat that recently passed I had him since I was nine years old, I always thought and treated him like family because of that he merged into my family circle. Also animals can symbols of family, like a bear, an owl, an elephant, etc. that they can be represented as your ancestors as a whole.

Myth #4 : Ancestors are limited to just blood family Also a misconception, close friends and even adopted family members are considered to be close family. Some people won’t have blood relatives in life and find their found family which is just as valid and meaningful like a blood family is. This also goes to if you’re a person that likes to write you might venerate your favorite author, if you like to draw or paint you can venerate an artist that you admired a lot. Your family might have patron saints, deities, or local heroes and spirits that have been part of your family for generations. That’s why it’s nice to know where your family originated from what country, village, city, etc.

Myth #5: No Ancestors of mine did anything wrong Everyone’s ancestors did something horribly wrong in their lifetime, some were messed up people. But there are good ones that aren’t like that anymore, if you want to venerate them that’s up to you and your practice. I personally don’t do it because especially if they did something wrong and have no remorse for it I ain’t venerating none of them.

There is no reason to be afraid.

I know I seemed to be fear mongering in the previous part that’s because I don’t want to sugarcoated of which is most likely to be expected.

The Bottom line when contacting (if you want to have contact with them) and venerating your ancestors is that their no different from a human person in this physical realm. They will have personalities, likes, dislikes, opinions, beliefs like any other human being BUT from my experience a lot of my ancestors are very wise, humorous, kind, and non-judgmental. My advice if you really want to contact someone who is going to be supportive and helpful in your paganism and witchcraft, ask specifically for that person I usually ask for ancient ancestors pre Christian wise but there many folk witches and pagan ancestors that are more modern and recent that can most definitely help you! Speak to them like any other human interaction would be as if you’re talking to a living friend, family member or complete stranger you’re meeting for the first time.

How to Communicate with your ancestors

I have mention “contacting” your ancestors you can speak with them it’s not impossible.

1. Meditation and dream work: Most common and effective way to really get them to communicate you and send signs is through dreams. Meditation for a clear and close connection with them.

2. Tarot: Very common and just as effective, my most recommended first step when communicating with your ancestors. Using a tarot deck can help with putting your foot through the door. There is a great book which will recommend at the of the blog that does ancestral and tarot together.

3. Pendulum and a spirit board: This is more in depth but it has been very effective for me and many others to really connect and communicate with my ancestors. It’s good to state your intentions and boundaries before doing any of said above, but this is where you really need to set it. Before starting grab the pendulum over the board don’t let it swing and say, “I ask of the good and supporting ancestors that have me in good intent and support of my path and practice, I would like to meet you”. Of course you get specific like “I would like to meet an ancient Roman ancestor” that’s just an example of how it would go safely and respectfully.

4. Just talking to them. Yep sounds easy enough, you would just get something that represents ancestors or even a specific ancestor. For instance your grandmother’s rosary and just talk to them or pray to them. It’s a very simple and comforting way to bond with your family.

Offerings

This is going to be a “it depends on the ancestors” but there has been a universal notion of what ancestors do really like. From items, food, drink, etc.

Rosaries for catholic ancestors or the cross for Christian ancestors generally speaking

Pagan symbols for your pagan ancestors

Statues of ancestral gods or saints or other important entities

Sweets: Cookies and cakes are very popular

Alcohol: my Germanic ancestors love it when I offer beer, mead, ale. But also wine and other alcoholic beverages for others.

Regular libations like water, coffee, tea. juice, etc. good substitute if you cannot use alcohol.

Their meals from their home country, my Italian ancestors, recent and ancient love it when I make them pasta.

Incense some cultures call it the food for spirits

Heirlooms

Family photographs

Candles

Coins

Book of the dead, if you meet an ancestor you can record them down into a book that is solely for your family and to be passed down on and on. It’s a memorial service to them that someone knows their name and who they were.

Specific traditions that your ancestors came from for instance libations of wine for your Greek ancestors.

Good ancestral veneration books that personally helped me a lot and I know a lot of others to get started.

Ancestral Tarot by Nancy Hendrickson she helps how to contact and connect with your ancestors and ancestry using tarot

Ancestral Grimoire by Nancy Hendrickson like Ancestral Tarot she goes how to connect with your ancestors but this time how to really work with them. One of the exercises is to work with an ancestor for a month and a different for the next one.

Honoring your Ancestors by Mallorie Vaudoise she gives good information on different ways to connect with your ancestors, the different types of ancestors, she does have a Southern European and Catholic folk magic take to it which is fine but it’s not the sole focus of it but she does put good information in the book to help someone get started. 

Badass Ancestors by Patti Wigington also good beginners guide to ancestral veneration and how to connect through meditations and develop relationships with them even how to deal with problematic ancestors. She goes into how to research your genealogy and useful tips!