#for all you know people making art in that way do so bc they cant handle the heavier aspects
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lunarharp · 5 months ago
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played dragon age 2...just simple scribbles
#dragon age tag#i doubt that will see much use again..but who knows. vvv rambling below#weird game..the characters dialogue stuff and ending were good tho :')#i've played some of the first game but it kept crashing. i knew already despite knowing nothing that this guy was going to be my type#it doesnt feel right making video game art any more bc games like this end up feeling really personal - an experience that happened to me#if i design the main character a bit and fall in love then..that happened to me..i can't make Fan Art of that..only ive been through that..#like i cant make fanart of my dear companions in bg3 despite it having been a huge part of my heart in the last year#almost 1000 hours of playtime in something i can barely talk about bc it means too much.... lol#tons of ideas and conversations and extra thoughts and scenes and emotions about all the incredible times i've been through in bg3#and the maelstrom just rotates around intensely in my own heart forever...but that's ok too...that is so precious to me#but fortunately i already knew people that have played this game and talked/drew abt it recently so it was saved from that for me#sharing scribbly fanart on my Blog is a way to capture the feeling just after experiencing something so it has good points#witch hat atelier escapes that by not being a GAME. games are so immersive. but my wha art & feelings are incredibly immersive too#which makes it difficult sometimes now. i live a complicated and emotional life <3 i am not suited to fandom <3#my character ended up looking so much like oru without me realising that's what i was doing. Kind bearded fireball throwing gay mage. Hmm.#falling for a sad white hair memory trauma fellow that keeps you at a tragic distance. Hmmmmmm.#i see also how very much bg3 is inspired by stuff like dragon age now lol so i'm glad i experienced it. I WANT MY KIRKWALL LIFE BACK...#so dated though as well and unpleasant at times (the city and the dismal atmosphere was depressing.) i hate violence/horror..#bg3 is SOOOO very dismal but it feels like I am killing people and going through horrors because i have to survive i have to be free#Well anyway. ahh it's so refreshing to fall in love. my gay journey continues...
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elllteo · 2 months ago
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gonna be real seeing you boil down someone else's concerns abt making light of a rapist in media as fandom drama really hurts as someone who's experienced that kind of violence first hand. the character is fictional and obviously doesnt exist. but rape victims do exist and we see when people sexualize or joke about predators. idk. i don't intend to tell you what to do, but i hope this helps maybe explain why someone else could've been startled or upset to see that on your blog. its your space you can do what you want with it. i think some media doesn't need to be fandomized or treated as yaoi fodder. maybe it can just be taken seriously and discussed with respect. i think its pretty reasonable for victims of particular types of violence to express discomfort or concern when people joke about or make light of those who perpetrate it.
I genuinely get where you are coming from, I do. But what that ask was getting at did not convey to me what you seem to have taken from it.
There's a difference between making light of/mocking/making jokes about sexual assault/rape vs drawing a character who does those things in a narrative in an unserious way. Likewise, I feel that boiling down the narrative to just be about that One Act in many, many ways does a disservice to the narrative and characters as a whole.
I'm also not understanding where exactly this is coming from, to be entirely honest.
A person can be fully capable of breaking down and analyzing Jimmy in a way that is entirely respectful while still, also, making light of other aspects or enjoying him removed from that context. Drawing a character in a goofy way doesn't mean the person is making light of Anya's SA, or even excusing it. You can ship two characters while still finding the canon actions of one absolutely despicable. These things are not mutually exclusive!
Just as you're not telling me what to do, I'm not saying you, or that other anon, or anyone else has to put up with seeing that character or engaging with media that portrays him that way, to be clear. I'm not trying to tell you that your feelings or hurt or experiences aren't valid, they clearly and very much are.
But it's not my job, or even obligation, to protect you from it. Or any other trigger, for that matter. I do what I can with tags, but that's a courtesy I try to apply when and where I can.
That's what I'm getting at here. I tagged for him and that ship so others could avoid it if they found it upsetting. The anon did not do that, so I explained my stance.
People will engage with media in ways that are upsetting to you, or ways that even disgust you. I can't stop them, I make no plans to, and if my opinions or behaviors around this are upsetting or disappointing to you, if I endanger you or anyone by behaving this way, it is in your best interest to block me and have a safer and less stressful experience online. Those tools are readily available for that very reason.
I know far too many others who have also experienced that kind of violence, family included. I know the frustration and hurt of making light of that kind of thing, and how it can and does impact others.
But this is not that.
If, however, you feel it is, that's your right! I can't tell you how to engage with anything, nor do I intend to. I cannot change my space to fit your needs, and I'm genuinely sorry if that makes you feel unsafe or upset. I'm not trying to make light SA or the victims thereof.
I'm trying to, as best as I can, explain that policing how others engage with a fandom and its characters simply does not and cannot work. That isn't "fandom drama" - it's the psychology of humans and the media they connect with. Humans are complicated creatures, and our needs and interests vary wildly.
There is no monolithic way to demand others engage with a source material, and attempting to do so does more harm to you than that effort is worth. I hope you and that other anon can have a less upsetting day/night/etc - again, I'm sorry if this is frustrating to hear, but I fear this is an impasse we simply won't agree on in this way.
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skitskatdacat63 · 1 year ago
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Thank you f1 for being canon compliant and putting Fernando in his habitual Santa suit
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captainshyguy · 2 days ago
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thinking a little recently about trivia based fandom vs transformative based fandom, and how cleanly these can be divided into reddit and tumblr fandoms respectively a lot of the time, and how foreign only doing the first is to me from an artist perspective
#idk. ik that looking up facts and knowing all the things about your favourite media can be fun#but so many people on reddit and similar places- those type of straight nerdy men#(and they are usually men. i say this as a man myself lol)#they do ONLY that. its the only valid form of nerdom for them because its all strictly canon#its being right. its something you can be right at.#but idk man. whats the point in knowing the designation of every single ship in sw#if you dont understand the themes of what ur watching#whats the point in knowing all the hollow knight lore-#if you dont understand how it highlights the games themes of ruin and memory and legacy#whats the point in knowing it all if you dont understand a lick of it#i keep thinking thay maybe this is the case because themes and literary analysis is much more subjective#its harder to be objectively right here. esp once u start transforming. expanding on canon#its insane to me thay so many of them see that as a lesser form of fandom#like im sorry but im out here digging into the well of this character in a way thatd make u vomit#because u cant imagine ur macho man having a hint of vulnerability.#idk i cant imagine being so fundamentally incurious about what the art you love is trying to say.#i cant imagine not wondering what the characters are feeling in a situation. wondering how an event might affect them etc#like sure my fics arent canon but theyre interesting conversations with it.#because we're trying to say something. idk i had to leave the hk subreddit bc this attitude in particular was bugging me#i remember someone was doing speculative thinking/charcter analysis about bretta and one comment was somethig like#'all this for a cartoon bug' KING UR O THE CARTOON BUG SUBREDDIT HELLO??#luke rambles
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aroanthy · 10 months ago
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hi!! i know u talk a lot about aromanticism a lot on here, but i don’t think i’ve ever seen u talk about aromantic anthy. would u mind discussing/elaborating on it or linking to a post where u do because i’m very curious!!
i got a similar ask half a year ago or something ridiculous like that on my main blog, but i’d like to really do justice to my url right now and explain it in more concrete terms.
i will say, it’s important to bear in mind that this reading of anthy’s character is very much informed by my own experiences, and a lot of those experiences are ones im not keen to talk in depth about. but you know. let’s make some nebulous gestures towards ideas of being traumatised, being autistic, struggling to meaningfully connect with others and honestly not really wanting to do such because of how they treat you.
like ive previously said, an aromantic perspective on the world would, i think, really benefit anthy. when youve lived your whole life experiencing violence at the hands of these patriarchal structures, of which romance is absolutely one, it’s kinda like. damn. im uncomfortable buying into those ideas.
anthy also has this lovely line in ep 19 where she says to utena ‘romance either happens or it doesn’t’ and it’s just sooooooo. so very interesting to me, actually, that anthy would say something so black and white about ‘romance’, a topic that anthy knows better than a lot of rgu characters is hopelessly confused and arbitrary and often enabling violence. and utena (fellow aromantic gaybo) says 'yeah, i know, but...'. these simplifications, these elisions. what is and isn't articulated. but what? maybe things are much more complicated than we'd like to think.
anyway enough of that tangent. one thing i as a trans and aromantic person always return to when discussing trans and aromantic readings of characters/texts more broadly is that there's no singular piece of evidence that can really cement these readings as Undeniable. it's like. okay. there's a critique of romance as a patriarchal structure in revolutionary girl utena. there's an ambiguity about anthy's feelings towards characters like utena, where there is clearly a queer connection but it takes shape in unconventional and complex ways. me, i'm aromantic, i see all of these pieces and i go oh well that's because she's an aromantic lesbian. you know, there's plenty of little moments i can evidence but those moments can be used to argue for an alloromantic lesbian anthy too. romance is a very arbitrary thing and i think everyone should take their own approach to it unapologetically. of course, mine is that it's hellish and i want nothing to do with it, but im just one guy. and im okay with that. i feel strongly about this reading and it is personal, and id be dishonest to say otherwise, but i do also find that it's well-evidenced in the text. as one of my lecturers once said, don't worry about authorial intent, it isn't real <3
#and authorial intent is NOT real i really cant emphasise that one enough#like it's fun to engage with the stuff a writer/director/whoever thinks about their art#and it can be very useful#but it's not definitive. that's not the last word on the topic#like did be papas consciously write any rgu character as aromantic? idk probably not#but i find such powerful aromantic narratives and themes coming through in this show#in how it chooses to examine relationships and power dynamics and the pervasive nature of romance as a concept#how it is so easily unequal how it is DESIGNED to be unequal how it offers chivalry and safety to mitigate harm#which it directly enables. makes easier#and that doesnt mean that aromanticism is the only solution bc you know. some ppl do feel romantic attraction#but it's like ok let's rethink 'romance'. let's combat amatonormativity let's challenge the relationship hierarchy that privileges#families and romantic partners in such a dangerous dangerous way#and i see all of that in this show and it resonates so deeply with my experiences many of which pertain to aromanticism#and you know. this show made me accept that im aromantic. so i think that speaks to how strongly these themes come through#but i digress. i find it hard to talk about this stuff bc its deeply personal and quite arbitrary#and also every time i do someone sends me anon hate about how i hate gay people. which is so cool btw please keep doing that#i didnt realise that loving being gay and loving gay people and loving when gay people love each other made me homophobic /s#just to clarify for the second time that is all sarcasm im gay and aromantic and i dont have time for arophobia here#anywayyyyy#im aware of all the asks ppl have sent me. im working on it i prommy <3#dais.txt#dais talks aspec
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sp4ceboo · 5 days ago
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ai rant in tags bc im so fucking tired
#came across an instagram account which used ai for animations#and this guy claimed to be an artist and i read a few of his replies to people calling him out for ai art and it made me SO ANGRY#like he said that him to his animations was less like an actor and more like a movie director like FUCK YOU MEAN#like no you didn't make that. other people made that. movie directors don't fucking plagiarise.#GRRR SO MUCH ANGER#the people talking to him were making VALID LOGICAL POINTS and he was just fobbing them off w like 'nice' replies asking for 'understanding#like FUCK OFF your heart emoji means NOTHING#worst of all i think most ai users like this know and understand what people are saying but they just ignore it bc ignoring it favours them#and the amount of people in the comments who were just like 'oh this is cool' PLS IT'S CLEARLY BLOODY FUCKING AI FUCK OFF#the worst thing about ai is that not only is it plagiarism but it's SO BAD FOR THE PLANET#idk the details but i know that it consumes so much water to function (to cool it down)#not to mention each search u do on ai takes up SO MUCH ENERGY like our planet is already fucked and with each use of ai it gets MORE FUCKED#and because our society wants things NOW and is obsessed with EFFICIENCY no once fucking cares#like we're ruining our planet using a thing we survived without perfectly fine??#like ok fine it's convenient in the short run BUT WHATEVER THAT DOESNT MATTER#ITS NOT CONVENIENT FOR OUR PLANET AT ALL#idk if we noticed but like?? WE LIVE HERE????#anyways i dmed this guy very politely asking if he'd taken into consideration the impacts of ai on the environment#i do not expect any sort of helpful response but i couldnt just sit there while this idiocy continued#obviously i cant fight every ai user in the world but i can sure as hell TRY#what is our society's obsession with new technology like we've blinded ourselves to how we're basically killing ourselves with it#like ok some people believe in ai conspiracy theories etc and obviously it's plagiarism but like?#even if you dont believe in either of those two points above it is still SO BAD for our planet#which also happens to be THE ONLY PLACE WE CAN SURVIVE IN THE WHOLE UNIVERSE#and bla bla bla elon musk will takes us to mars NO HE FUCKING WONT.#anyways if he could he'd obviously find a way to do it and milk everyone of their money#and then he'd leave 'commoners' like us to die on earth#not that i even think he'll be able to get people living on mars in his lifetime or mine anyways#space boo screams into the void#ai
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mainfaggot · 9 months ago
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just watched challengers at the cinema w my little sister. it was so intense wtf
#i was like grabbing onto my scalp just yanking my hair in the last 5 mins and at the end i yelled (quietly) LOVE WINS!#bc there were only 4 other ppl in the cinema lol#its so fucking stupid on the surface like ok complicated polyamory and also insane obsession with a sport bc that is what makes these people#who they are; as in the sport IS their identity as individuals that's what fills the void that lies underneath skin and bone etc.#blah blah basic shit about messy relationships with the self and romantically with others#but it's also so profound because despite the many obstacles and personality differences. they all love one another and the sport so much.#it's so weird it's twisted in a sense because it's like they only have one another and then obviously tennis (bc tennis is the bridge)#it's very.. codependent#i can't believe my little sister understood like not in a condescending way i cant believe she got it but in a “oh i didnt know you watched#stuff with this much emotion and that you cared enough to critique media“ since she doesn't usually tell me about what shes watching#and when she does she tells me about sitcoms ..#so yeah it was nice that we watched it together but also kind of weird bc#well surface level: the make out scenes were just us giggling awkwardly#and on a deeper level when i was watching it. i couldn't help but think about how#patrick at some point turned into an observer; he stopped being a part of the art tashi patrick trio (and tennis!) and turned#into a spectator#despite very much still being a fellow player#and then tashi became a spectator of the sport despite very much being absorbed in it all and in love with art (?)#i dont know what else to call it but her need to control him came from a place of some kind of care ... albeit manipulative and self serving#so Patrick and tashi are almost parallel lines if that makes sense#theyre kicked out of “the club” whatever the club may be (for Patrick he's no longer in the trio) and for Tashi once the trio is long gone#she's no longer a competitor bc of her injury#and then art is just in the middle of it all#and he'd always followed Patrick's lead in the past and then he started thinking for himself until he became so taken by Tashi#and then he just became her little follower#he just wants to be loved and told what to do because he doesn't know how else to live. im projecting? im projecting. anyway!#the ending. god. the ending sums up their whole past dynamic:#patrick is petty. art is irritated. tashi doesn't get their little dynamic. patrick loves art. art is forgiving. tashi loves the sport#(and maybe she loves them both in her own fucked up control freak way)#z.post
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crescentfool · 2 years ago
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hello everyone! now that team picking is out i wanted to say that i am participating in artfight for the first time this year on team werewolves! (its the color blue. i love the color blue.)
you can find my profile here! https://artfight.net/~crescentfool
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thimbleb3rries · 1 year ago
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ASFSBDJHKHDHAJF me when I
Anyone: /reblogs my art or writing
Me: /fucking RUSHES OVER TO SEE IF ANYTHING IS IN THE TAGS
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snekdood · 9 months ago
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personally, i dont see the fundamental difference between deleting your account and making a new one and deleting all your old posts, if we're talking about "running from ones past", then what are you tryna hide there, bud?
#mood#vent#the evidence of your past is gone regardless either way sooooooooooo#how is it so different and how do you keep convincing yourself you're morally superior?#i mean- this is me pretending I agree that that's true to play devils advocate a lil here#bc i know the only reason i deleted any account of mine was bc i just like fresh starts sometimes#and tbh i struggle to find a username i like and some website require me to delete & remake in order to change it#what-- is the problem that you struggle to hold on to me and keep track of me?#bc i promise as soon as i start posting my ocs people Will know who I am regardless of if I recreate-#at least yall and your kiwifarms stalking-ass followers will recognize it and immediately report back to their cult leader#so whats your issue here EXACTLY?#you're already documenting everything I do. so whats your issue?#i mean. is it bc other people wont 'know who I am' and what YOU think i'm like? even though other people- strangers-#already dont know who I am?#bc if thats your argument- I could say the same for you! how are people supposed to 'know who you are' when you delete all your posts?#there was only 1 time I actually deleted my acct out of fear of how ppl would treat me- and it was bc I was dating you!#you made me feel like I had to be Perfect. so quite frankly#blame yourself you bum#what can I say- ig i learned how to cover my tracks from you.#bc before you- I probably would have left it up even with all the bs happening at the time#and now I regret deleting it bc the only reason I did was to impress you with how Good I Am. 🤮#be honest- the reason you're upset is bc you cant use what was on that blog against me#even though what was on that blog PALES in comparison to the kind of shit you've done and posted.#ok ignoring you now and focusing on me again- there was so much art on that blog thats just lost forever and it makes me sad.#even any problematic things. I woulda wanted to keep it if only to keep an archive of my growth as an artist#plus there was a gif of hoody dancing to the thrill by wiz khalifa (i think that was the song I made the gif to) that i'll never get back 😔#i honestly have an issue with deleting my art in general- stuff that isnt problematic so dont start w me bitch- but- for some reason#I just used to get these urges to delete shit like out of shame. I think its bc of being trans and trying to stuff that down and feeling#ashamed that I even wanted to be the guy I wanted to be so I would just get rid of it all and .-.#theres a lil chunk of my comic art that's just gone forever and i wish ik everything I drew. at least I remember one of the ocs i deleted
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etherealkissed88 · 9 months ago
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its all about self, not the physical object.
its so interesting knowing u are never manifesting a material object, but the version of u with that object. u are always manifesting urself, thats why we always want the feeling & why the material world (3d) is always neutral. since everything is u -> u are always manifesting you!
stop trying to "get" the material object and BEcome the person who already has it. there is a difference between the two. there are infinite STATES, infinite versions of YOU, not versions of that car or that acceptance letter (<-reread this until it clicks!) BE it, dont chase it.
the object does not define the person. edward art said that two ppl can have the same clothes. lets say two ppl have a juicy contour tracksuit; one knows they are poor and ugly & the other knows they are rich and beautiful.
the object doesnt mean shit for their identities!
objects cant change who you are - YOU change who you are! even if you think otherwise like the object brings you confidence aka a new identity, at the end of the day it is YOU deciding to change based on the object. its all you. stop putting objects on the pedestal! the change in identity and what you know to be true about yourself comes from YOU. THATS what u have to CHANGE, NOT the object itself. crave BEING that version of you, NOT the object.
you're always only manifesting yourself, never the object. this is a fact so idc if u think im wrong. we are always being (manifesting) a version of ourselves. and this version might have a material object but the root of it all is that we are always manifesting a version of US! NOT THE OBJECT. this also makes sense bc everything is only you (consciousness) so ofc you will always be manifesting yourself. thats why we say the only success story is when you change self/states/your identity or fulfill yourself! its all about YOU YOU YOU, not the OBJECT!
this connects to "you dont want the object, u want the feeling (knowing/fulfillment)." listen: OFC U WANT THE OBJECT. but yall gotta realize that the object gives u some kind of validation or satisfaction so thats WHY u want it.
you want a car -> you want the feeling/freedom of driving wherever, whenever; having control you want a glow up -> you want to know/feel comfrtoable in your own skin or have people love the way you look; self validation or validation from others you want to be with this sp bc you love them -> you want to be loved & give love; want to feel worthy of love, etc
everything comes down to SELF, what you KNOW about you. its the feeling that comes first and THEN the object. its not you want the object THEN the feeling. that makes no sense.
theres nothing wrong w acknowledging u want the feeling first. some of yall love arguing about how this is wrong but it actually helps so many ppl who get so hyperfixed on the object itself, getting unhealthy obsessions & anxieties over objects when getting objects isnt the goal.
i know for a fact that the ppl who say its wrong are the same ppl who havent felt fully fulfilled w something they want. bc when you become truly fulfilled, you literally KNOW you have it even when you dont physically have it. the feeling feels SO powerful.
you can even get fulfilled / know "negative shit" in the 3d. thats proof that the FEELING CONTROLS ALL. regardless of the physical, regardless of the objects. this is especially true since everything in the 3d is NEUTRAL. so feelings are all you can receive from it!
★ you are always manifesting yourself, not the object
☆ you want the feeling first, then the object regardless if you believe it
★ having a object doesnt change your state/identity -> you do
☆ stop focusing on the object & just be
kisses, cutie jani ☆
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bobluvbot · 10 months ago
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late night cravings
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pairing: sirius black x afab!reader summary: you sneak off the night for a cheeky midnight snack, hoping sirius won’t notice (spoiler alert: he does, and he’s sulky about it)  wc: 4k cw: pregnancy & baby talk, descriptions of food and eating, brief allusions to sex (not directly stated), no physical traits of reader specified but sirius can hold things out of reader’s reach  a/n: so i had a lengthy angst fic for sirius’s debut on my blog and im halfway done on it but i cant seem to finish it bc it sends me to a depressing spiral each time <33333 so pls enjoy a very self-indulgent domestic excessively fluffy blurb with my beloved <33333 p.s this is not proofread so plz ignore mistakes ty <3
opening the tomato salsa jar turned out to be the hardest part. 
back in bed, you thought the trickiest part of your late night escapade from sirius black was his long limbs wound up tight with yours, even in low light of the small nightlight in the corner, you could still make out the intricate script and designs following the curves and dips of his strong arms, holding you close to his chest. 
you had it committed to memory by now, having explored sirius’s body well enough to memorize the way his skin feels against yours, with heartbeats and breaths falling in sync without much effort. 
judging by the way his breathing gets heavy after every exhale and the little snores that escape in between, you knew he was beyond knackered. it was day five of sirius’s new job as an deputy director at the auror office. the day he learned about the promotion was pure unadulterated happiness. after letting you know through an express owl, you mustered up enough vigor available to your seven months pregnant self to get out of the house and go to the local shops to get party supplies and food to celebrate sirius’s achievement. 
Coming in third out of the list of things he genuinely loved in this life, after you and his luscious locks of course, was his job as an auror. young sirius had never thought in his wildest dreams that he’d work at the ministry, much less actually enjoy it. can’t really blame sixteen year old sirius, starting an underground rock band with the marauders seemed like the perfect thing to do after gruelling hours of studying at hogwarts. 
defense against the dark arts came to him naturally, with some counterspells like second nature to him as being exposed with use of dark magic young gave him no choice but to grow up quickly and defend himself from the excruciating pain or the mind control that was from his own family’s doing. Winning the first wizarding war alongside his friends and found family has solidified sirius’s calling in eradicating the use of dark magic and making sure the next generation can have a safe and normal life without the looming threat of a megalomaniac sorting people with their blood status and taking over the wizarding world. 
that night, sirius walked into a dark and eerily quiet home that had his senses on overdrive. but when the lights turned on and he saw familiar faces of his loved ones all beaming with pride, and there you were in the center, looking ethereal and round and all his, with his favorite red velvet cake on hand and a ridiculously big balloon that says “congratulations” tied to the candle, he could have melted in a syrupy mess of gooey happiness right then and there if he hadn’t caught himself together last minute.
Sirius had thought– that after you agreeing to go on one date with him to hogsmeade, winning the quidditch cup and seeing the proud look on minerva’s face, going home for christmas break and euphemia welcoming him with a kiss on the cheek and a warm hug, remus teaching at the very same classroom you all were in years back, james and lily’s first kiss at the altar, holding little baby harry in his arms, you walking down the aisle with a bouquet of peonies in the most beautiful dress, and when you held his hand that one night and told him that you were expecting—- that he knew of love. but you do something extraordinary that has him scrambling to add to the endless list of why you’re the love of his life. he was so focused on you that he wasn’t prepared to catch pure muscle of james’s body as he flung himself to tackle his best friend in a hug. luckily, remus with a party hat was aptly standing between a toppling sirius and the living room wall, and he singlehandedly saved the two from creating a huge hole in the drywall. 
this was the life, sirius had thought after many hours of partying celebrating and eating, when he laid beside you in bed, limbs tangled, sated and dizzy and warm as you both came down from your highs. and he gets to spend it with you.
but as fun and exciting sirius’s new job is, it entailed an increased amount of responsibility as he was assisting the head auror. his least favorite part of the job was the boatloads of paperwork he has to deal with. An express owl almost dropped a howler letter into the soup you were making for dinner earlier that day and you opened it up panicking thinking it was an emergency. But no, it was just sirius whining that his hand hurt and is about to fall off and that he needs you to kiss it better. 
You did eventually, and one thing led to another and here you were, tucked in your husband’s warm embrace. you could stay here forever, only separating to drink water and bathroom trips, but the gnawing urge to eat something savory, sweet, tangy, and crunchy has possessed your entire being, the only way to quell it was to get up and go to the kitchen. the baby doesn’t seem to have a semblance of time yet, a fact you both envied and despised, because the clock on your nightstand said it was 3:48am in bold red numbers. A few months ago, you’d never be caught dead awake at this time, taking your precious sleep time seriously. The man himself would poke fun at you and say you’d gladly sleep through an earthquake or a housefire just as long as you get your seven to eight hours of sleep per day, and despite of your assumed role of contradicting and arguing with spontaneous and stubborn sirius, you had to agree.
But this was not about you anymore, or at least not quite yet for a good seventeen years, so you untangle yourself from sirius and your perfectly warm and cool side of the bed and waddle down the carpeted stairs, careful not to set foot on the creaky step that might risk waking sirius up. You need your secrets too, and you’re not in the mood to share food.
Grateful for the heavens that you and sirius stocked up on groceries two days ago, you had a wide selection of random items to munch on. A few days ago, you were introduced to the idea of a fluffernutter sandwich while scrolling through the short videos on your feed. Peanut butter and marshmallow fluff as spreads on their own was something you didn’t mind eating, but both together in a sandwich? You were enthralled, and the only way to quell the curiosity was to make it. So you did. 
You shovel and slather more than enough spread on each slice of bread, though you might have used the same spoon on both jars.. but who’s to tell you off otherwise, your snoozing husband upstairs? pfft. 
Smiling happily as if committing a particularly naughty crime, you place the spoon in your mouth, licking off the gooey mixture as you place the sandwich on a piece of paper towel (yes, you take the no dishwashing tonight seriously) on the table. humming, you mull over what to prepare next.
The baby needs something savory and tangy, but you’re not particularly keen on going through all the effort of heating up the soup from dinner, not to mention the amount of cutlery and dishes you’ll use for that, so you zero in on the tostada shells you chose rather than tortilla chips because its much more crispier. 
Opening the fridge, you see the laughing cow on a round packaging and decide its the one, so you grab two cheese wedges from it. 
Sirius had argued that the next aisle had actual, real blocks of cheese with a variety on display and that there was no point in getting artificially flavored ones. But you’ve gotten really good at giving him the stank face, which inadvertently ends 75 percent of nonsense bickering before it even starts; and since you’ve started showing more and more, sirius has admittedly gone softer on you, not that he was ever more but a pushover your entire relationship. Merely widening of eyes and a jut of your lower lip, even adding a slight tremble or two during times where you did actually fuck up, sirius can’t hold his stance longer than a minute before sighing and taking you in his arms. he might call you out for being a brat at times, but there’s no denying he loves it. And so the artificial wheel of cheese wedges got purchased and bagged home, and you’re meticulously spreading it over the golden shells, leaving little to no gaps of it bare. 
Laying it on another paper towel, your heart gets giddy on your chest knowing you’re in for a treat tonight. But not quite time to start munching, the baby reminds you that you still need something tangy to complete the meal. So comes your big predicament, should you get dill pickles or tomato salsa? 
It took you ten seconds too long of weighing down the pros-and-cons of choosing one and feeling like you made the wrong choice if you end up not liking it. It doesn’t help that the pregnancy hormones make you more anxious and tend to put you always on the verge of tears. So when the not-so-groundbreaking idea of just eating them both hits you, you feel the weight slide off your shoulders as you sigh. Because again, who’s gonna tell you that eating pickles this late at night can give you bad acid reflux, your snoozing husband? Pfft.
Snacking on some, you do manage to pick out the juiciest looking pickle chips and lay them atop of your tostadas. You and the little one are beyond excited to dive in. It’s looking like a mini upside-down pizza with the cheese spread first then the pickle as toppings. Only thing left now was the the tomato salsa slathered on top to seal the deal. 
Opening tight lids wasn’t an issue for you before, in fact, you took pride when friends hand you a jar or bottle to open because you could do it in a breeze. Chances were, the lid wasn’t even screwed on that tight, you were just built different, you’d say with a shrug once you give the items back. So when the tomato jar doesn’t budge after two attempts, you get puzzled.
Maybe your hands were slippery? You wipe them down with a tea towel and try again. No.
You weren’t holding it tight enough? Fingers held taut against the lid, you try three times. Still no.
Determined, you try different positions before letting the jar go, shooting it glares as if it’d get intimidated and just open up for you. You were also getting lightheaded, and passing out on the kitchen floor due to excessive stimulation of your vagal reflex because you were too stubborn to use magic or wake your husband up to open it for you doesn’t seem like the best way to spend the early Tuesday morning hours.
Magic was even out of the option (well, in your brain it was), because your wand’s tucked beside sirius’s on your nightstand, and frankly, you don’t have the patience to drag yourself upstairs just to flick a utility spell to open the wretched thing. So you do the next best option: lose hope. 
The disappointment was mutual between you and your baby. And the acid reflux did start to kick in, making your stomach grumble in both hunger and pain. This was all going so well until it isn’t, tears began to make its way up to your eyes.
“See, this is what you get for being greedy and eating all snacks by yourself,” sirius huffs behind you, deep voice still raspy with sleep. You didn’t even hear him getting out of bed and coming down the stairs, that’s how preoccupied you were with opening the jar.
He grabs the container away from you to open it, but not without throwing a scowl at your direction, handsome face contorted with furrowed eyebrows and downturned mouth, enough to express that he felt betrayed by this whole ordeal. If you were in a better mood, you’d poke his sides and tackle him playfully, teasing him for being sulky. But for now, you need the jar opened so you could eat in peace. You’ll deal with the sharing food issue later.
“t wasn’t supposed to take long,” you mumble, caught off guard and refusing to make eye contact, pretending the fridge magnets beside sirius’s head is ten times more interesting than his face. You don’t miss his raised eyebrow and snort at your response. 
The second attempt comes and he opens it with a satisfying pop. your mouth falls agape, eyeing the *now accessible* tomato salsa dip in disbelief. What the hell? 
And you couldn’t even take the smug grin spreading across sirius’s face by the millisecond. Refuse to. You try to snatch the open container away from him but he holds it higher and out of reach, making a show of puffing his chest, flexing his biceps, even giving it a kiss. This is all James’s doing, you need to have a talk with Lily soon about keeping these two separated.
“Sirius!” you try to plead your way out. the trademark innocent, pouty expression settles on your face like a second mask, hoping he’d go down this easy. 
It doesn’t work. He just chuckles, mocking your pleas and face while his free hand sneaks up and pinches your unsuspecting cheek to tease you further.
You yelp in mock outrage and swat his hand away, trying your best to keep your displeasure firm on your face, but you feel the giggles coming up. “This is why I sneak out alone to eat, you’re such a bully,” you huff, but take a seat in front of your makeshift spread. 
Sirius places the jar near you, but not without poking your exposed sides, armed with the knowledge that the easiest way to get you laughing (and eventually conceding in an argument) is knowing where your tickle zones are. “Oh yeah,” he drawls, plopping himself beside you. “That’s also why you’re the only one waking up with an upset stomach, stinking up our bathroom so early in the morning.”
Now this one got you appalled, embarrassed, disturbed, basically hit with all the feelings. You’ve been living together long before you got married, and he never brought up this issue until today. “That’s it. I’m leaving.” He makes a move to snatch the sandwich away but the embarrassment on your cheeks made you more agile, swatting his hand away and shielding the sandwich with your hands. “After I finish my meal,” you continue, shooting him a glare.
But see, one of the things that drove you nuts even way back at Hogwarts, was how Sirius Black mostly managed to outsmart you or be one step ahead of you in everything. After you turned him down without much thought whatsoever despite his grand declaration of interest, Sirius took it upon himself to show you (1) that you made a mistake for rejecting him, (2) that his ego won’t let you embarrass him like that again, (3) and that you won’t get rid of him that easily. Once he set his eyes on you, you were face to face with him in everything: grades, OWLs/NEWTs scores, Quidditch plays and bets, wins at the duelling club, even with the fucking gobstones tournament. He never let you catch a break.
Things were surely different now, since you vowed to be with him in sickness and health and untill death parts you both– hell, you’re carrying his child. So you figured maybe, maybe, he’ll let you catch a break this time. Let you eat in peace as you mull over his bathroom comment and how you’re going to get him back. 
But again, no. Unlike you, Sirius remembered to grab his wand from the nightstand. Not even batting an eye, he says nonchalantly, “Accio sandwich.” And the fluffernutter you protected with all your physical might managed to escape your watch, and land gracefully on his waiting palm. 
What irritated you more from this whole ordeal? The prodigal auror that climbed his way up the ranks and became the youngest deputy director, fully capable of complex spells and wielding different kinds of magic, felt the need to do a verbal Accio spell just to make a point to you.
Out of words, you just stare at him blankly. Too stunned to even cry in frustration because you knew you made a conscious, willing choice to be with this man. 
Maybe your best guilt-tripping expression comes best when you’re not trying. Color drains from his face when you remained silent and he scrambles to take a bite off the sandwich before handing it back to you, or rather placing it on your limp hand as you refuse to acknowledge it, still too hurt to budge. “‘m sorry, baby. Just wanted to eat with you since we didn’t get to earlier.”
He did arrive later than usual, deciding to finish the stack of case files and paperwork so he won’t have to sift through them again the next day. There were plans to wait for him before eating, but when the jitteriness and slightly nausea started to kick in, you had no choice in the matter. Sirius had been sulky and clingy the moment he got home, and as compromise, you stayed to watch him eat; listening and reacting animatedly as he ranted about his stressful day.
So you cut him off some slack, also exhausted from all the emotional stimulation sirius brought since he woke up. As a silent peace offering (also because you’re not ready to say sorry to his face), you slide the tostadas within his reach and finally take your bite of the goddamn sandwich. It was good, tasted as expected, sweet peanut butter. You’d probably have it again as a drunk at 3am meal.
Sirius also went and got snacks of his own: microwaved popcorn, pickles, toasted bread slathered with butter, and grapes. Together, you munched on the little spread of random food you could find in your kitchen at 4am in comfortable silence, which is surprising after the earlier bickering. No matter how cheesy it sounded in your head, sirius was the only person that can drive you to the brink of insanity and right back. You were in for a hell of a ride for the foreseeable future; and while there’s a lot of uncertainty right now and changes to be made when the little one gets here, you’re beyond happy that you get to do all this with him. 
Sleep was beginning to creep up on you. Of course he notices this right when you do, so a warm arm wrapped across your back urges you to settle on his lap, bodies melding into the familiar crevices like puzzle pieces, though you both had to adjust certain angles to accommodate your growing belly. You sit like this for a while; your head tucked securely in the crook of his neck, steady breaths lulling you to sleep, while sirius’s hands instinctively finds its way under your sleep shirt and on the natural curve of your belly, lithe fingers stroking and drawing soothing circles anywhere he could reach. 
you wish you could stay like this forever– cozy and soft and safe– but alas, you were carrying sirius black’s offspring. the baby decides to reward you with a round of kicks, probably giddy after feeling their father’s touch. Sirius chuckles and coos at your bump, while a muffled groan leaves your lips from the sudden onslaught of movement, but still refusing to move from this comfortable position.
Smooth cold lips touch the side of your forehead and you relish in the feeling. “Does it ever hurt, love? All that kicking and wiggling?” 
“Not really,” a content sigh leaves your lips. “Feels strange at times, seeing your belly move on its own.” 
To prove your point, two tiny bulges make a split second appearance just above where Sirius’s hand lay. His thumb soothes the area lovingly.
“Definitely getting stronger though; Lily told me during the later months, harry for some reason loved to kick downwards, making bathroom trips more frequent than it already is. Not excited for that.”
He presses kisses on your forehead, temple, hairline, anywhere he could reach without moving too much. “Things that you do and endure for this ‘lil troublemaker,” sirius murmurs. He doesn’t need to say it out loud, you could feel his body reverberating with awe and fondness. You try to bask in it for as long as you could, but a passing thought makes its presence known to you again.
“Do i really make the bathroom stink?” it comes out whinier than you intended it to be but you just had to know for peace of mind. 
Sirius’s whole frame vibrates as he tries to stifle his laughter, taking you with him. He’s laughing at your expense but you feel your own giggles brewing in your belly. You try to hold it in for longer, preserving some self respect. “A little bit,” he says solemnly. You groan, earlier mortified feeling returning in full swing. It triggers another round of chuckles.
“But dove, it’s nothing that my deep love and adoration for my lovely strong hot and sexy wife can’t handle.” He says assuredly, and you curse yourself for being so down bad for this man as blood rushes to your cheeks from his words. Good thing it’s dim and your face is still tucked in the crook of his neck. 
You do pinch his arm in response, and both your laughters compliment the comfortable silence. 
“Although,” he says after a while. “The betrayal of you eating without me still hurts.” 
“Siri.. i’m sorry,” you mumble. “‘y looked so tired, Didn’t wanna wake you up.”
He tuts and doesn’t say much after that. In sirius dictionary, this means he just wants some affection from you— for you to dote on him and coax out his forgiveness, even if you both know he’s not really mad; judging by his arms still wrapped securely around your frame and steady breaths that tickle and fan on your bare skin. 
So you mimic his actions from earlier, planting tiny kisses on his neck, collarbones, jawline, anywhere your lips could reach. Kissing his cheek seem to do the trick, his fake scowl quickly coming undone as a bashful smile breaks through the frown, and his tiny dimple you love so much making an appearance. The muggle maternity books did say dimples are genetic, so an image of a little Sirius running around and smiling up at you with those dimpled cheeks is a warming thought. 
“I am charming all the lids to be stuck at night as soon as i wake up tomorrow for work.” You poke a sensitive spot on his side, making him jolt, but you couldn’t resist laughter as it bubbles out of the surface. “You’re insufferable, I can’t believe I married a psychopath.”
“And you let him knock you up too. I’d say it takes one to know one, hm?” 
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panther-os · 2 years ago
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I have hopes and dreams and predictions for the show but if they don't come true, I go "Okay, this is actually really cool in another direction" or "Damn, that was disappointing but I wonder what's gonna happen next" and I enjoy what I got and go write fanfiction about what I didn't.
"Expectations are premeditated disappointments." This doesn't mean don't have expectations, it means be aware your expectations might not be met and that you're going to have an emotional reaction about it.
And while I don't believe there's any such thing as overreacting because you feel what you feel, there is such a thing as reacting appropriately or inappropriately. So when your expectations are let down and you're having an emotional reaction about it, make sure to express that reaction appropriately.
Maybe come up with a plan in advance. "If Cody doesn't show up in the finale, I will choose something else I like about the episodes to focus on instead of obsessing over my disappointment. When I'm done watching, I will be miserable into my pillow for a bit to properly feel the emotion. Afterward, to cheer myself up, I will grab comfort food or take a shower and then make/look for fanworks about what he was doing instead or about him deus ex machina-ing the episode. I will not harass the creative team who did their jobs or my fellow fans who aren't that upset about it."
Please reblog if you're here for the story.
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I watch The Bad Batch as an exploration of the beginning of the Empire from the perspective of a group of fugitives trying to get by in a galaxy that doesn't always make sense.
I'm here for their story.
I'm here for WHATEVER the writers, artists, and composers give us in their own good time. I want the plot to be given to me slowly. I want a character's redemption or further fall to have so much meat to it that I sit back and think, "Wow. They went through hell to get here."
I want to find out what makes the characters tick one morsel at a time, and I'm NOT going to complain about where the writers take them if it's not what I envisioned for them because it's the story.
Honestly, I'm finding this fandom to be a tedious place lately. A lot of people only seem to enjoy the show if they are given exactly what they want by the writers and the moment the show deviates from that, they complain.
I'm here for the story. Please reblog this or leave me a comment if you are too because I want to surround myself with other fans who are here for the Batch's story in whatever direction it takes us.
#/incoherent noises/#star wars#the bad batch#op is right some of y'all need to learn chill like yesterday#dont even get me started on the unwh/tewashtbb gang#as a bipoc i am ashamed to share a fandom with people so aggressively proselytizing about the bare minimum#racism doesnt start and stop at whitewashing and there are far more concerning things to me in the show#like trandoshans being antisemitic caricatures who in tcw literally hunt and kill children for sport#and cid especially is greedy and selfish and only being portrayed as more and more so to play up phee#i love phee so much but pitting two marginalized women against each other is not the thing to do disney#its pretty obvious just about everybody knows tem is māori and the clones shouldn't look the way they do#just look at all the art#though some of yall take it too far in the opposite direction and make them black instead of māori#bc y'all cant tell bipoc apart ig???#i am also still very much going to die on the hill of y'all making fun of gree's hair is racist#bc it is and i have energy to defend that one small thing even though literally nobody is listening#anyways its a finished work of fiction and we're getting one chapter at a time#unless you got a time machine the writer's choices are already made and you have to live with that#everybody does bc thats how common sense works#if you dont like it read or write fanfiction that is literally what fanfiction is for#youre entitled to your opinion and your right to be disappointed and complain#but dear god please have some civility about it#anyway i said dont get me started and then got myself started#i have Opinions about this#when it comes to media hoard things that spark joy yeet things that dont and move on with your life
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choccy-milky · 29 days ago
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I dont know why I had this vision of clora riding a scooter, like a cute light blue one with italy vibes, like a vespa, and sebastian panicking behind her LMAO
I SEE THE VISION AS WELL...idk how shes on a vespa tho since they werent invented yet so lets just assume theres time-turner shenanigans going on LMAO
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but also anon this request was so funny to me because the SAME day you sent me it, i also got this one on twitter:
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TRULY THE DUALITY OF MAN IS AT PLAY HERE!!! LMAOO debauchery vs wholesomeness...and it made me laugh so much
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(and for anyone curious yes i WILL also be honouring the other request......eventually👀)
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@jstfndmthngs splitting your ask into 2 again bc its a CHONKER but I LOVED READING IT🥹🥹 "how much they love each other to the abnormal level that i envy" LMAOO THATS FANFICTION FOR YOU, BABY!!😍 also YESS interacting with my readers in the comments was my fav parts of writing a lot of the time, and im SOOO grateful to the ppl who commented bc without them the story would have turned out DRASTICALLY DIFFERENT. like, i know there are some people who write the entirety of their fanfic and then upload it in chunks, but if i had done that/written my story in a vacuum and hadnt incorporated any of my readers ideas/suggestions it would have been SOOOO much worse honestly LMAO. like, not even necessarily putting their requests or ideas in my fic, but even sometimes just reading a comment that would say something like "i cant wait to see how clora/seb reacts to..." would make me think...oh. i was never planning on even showing their reaction to that. but now that they say that, good point, i definitely need to include that LOL. so yeah even just little stuff like that was SUPER important to my writing process and my story and helped me keep in mind what people wanted to see/things i may have missed or glossed over if i'd been writing by myself, but i also just loved getting comments in general bc i loved reading them and they were so motivating🥹 BUT THANK U SO MUCH IM GLAD U LIKED MY STORY/SEB & CLORA SO MUCH, AND TY FOR SHARING ALL YOUR THOUGHTS WITH ME!!🥹💖💖 im lowkey the same way... i cant read any other fics rn bc im still too attached to seb/clora BAHAHA so i still need to give it some time before i delve into other HL fics (i even downloaded a program that will let me replace names so that i can replace the mc's name with clora's LMFAOOOO THATS HOW MENTALLY ILL I AM ABOUT THEM!!😭😭DONT COME FOR ME🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🚓)
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omg...i already love unlocking kinks in people but for it to be specifically seb x clora is even more of an honour BAHAHA omg i love that....but i get it too. clora is submissive and breedable af😍LMAOO (im sorry💀that wasnt me just now that was seb blame him)
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@acrenna MERRY LATE CHRISTMAS AND ALSO LATE HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! this is so sweet THANK YOU SO MUCH😭😭im happy my story was able to get you out of your reading slump!! (and hopefully will continue to, with my oneshot im slowly but surely working on😩) BUT THANK YOU AGAIN I APPRECIATE YOU SM🥹🥹💖
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@misskkfritz you actually arent the first to say this and i also saw a pinterest comment on my art say this........FELLAS DO I NEED TO WATCH GILMORE GIRLS NOW🤔🤔🤔
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beiibeiii · 6 months ago
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"baby." she's got to be crazy
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short arlecchino angst-ish hcs bc ive had alot on my mind lately and im sleepy (wlw)
art - tehettenandayo on twt
every morning she tries to leave the house as early as possible to avoid you. somedays, she leaves before the sun even rises. she most certainly makes a lot of effort in trying to get away from you. call her selfish, she doesn't really care. she doesn't want to bother making one extra serving of coffee or breakfast. you can always make it yourself.
arlecchino would take her wedding ring off and pockets it when she's at work as the 4th fatui harbinger. she doesn't want people to think she's gone weak. not letting people know she's taken by you. she only wears the wedding ring when she's around you so you don't question her.
she fucking hates physical touch and stupid cheesy 'lover' things. she feel sick just at the thought of someone else's arms all over her. she hates it when she has to call you "baby" or "my dear". especially in public, she just sort of half mumbles the pet names quietly. she wouldn't want people to hear her say such sappy shit. it isn't like you don't already have a name anyways.
i cant see her ever responding to your text messages properly, like she has so much better things to do. she leaves you on sent or read most the times. occasionally hitting you with the "👍" if shes being nice. probably ghosts u alot lol. you have tried to confront her about it. she just tells you she doesn't have time.
same goes for when you call her. whether if it is a emergency or not, you'd get sent straight to voicemail. she doesn't check those either.
she dislikes it alot when you try to post photos of you two on social media. she just doesn't want to be seen with you. not only that, the captions you put in are way too 'cutesy' for her style. she has a reputation to hold after all.
arlecchino probably doesn't have high libido at all. she's rarely ever in the mood. whenever you do ask her, she just tells you she's busy with something else. you feel embarrassed for even building up the courage at all. that was the last time you openly talked about having sex together.
whenever you two somehow end up fucking, arlecchino always has her mind elsewhere. more worried about how much banging noises the headboard is making or how much of a bother it is to change the bed sheets after. there is no aftercare too. the most you'd probably get is a "you did well." afterwards, you'd succumb to exhaustion and fall asleep. only to find yourself alone that next morning.
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pastabaguette · 17 days ago
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hi!! i just wanted to try and clear something up with you bc i really need to know? what are your thoughts on eridan as a whole? bc i love your art and i love all your equius stuff (youve made me rethink him as a character that i initially wrote off, a lot like how i used to do with eridan before i re-read the comic) but the hitler joke in one of your humanstuck doodles really rubbed me the wrong way and i couldnt decipher if it was just supposed to be taken as a write off joke or if it was supposed to be exaggerated. theres a really massive misconception within the fandom that eridan is/would be a neonazi and tbh i cant keep following you if you believe that. he's my favorite character and it just makes me upset to see popular artists in the fandom still not reading further into him beyond the surface level and perpetuating fanon that makes volotile people in the fandom harass ampora fans. nothing against you personally, as i dont know you personally. i just would really like to know your full thoughts on him as a character.
hello! no, i don’t think humanstuck eridan (edison) would genuinely be a neo-nazi. i do think he’s definitely falling down that alt-right pipeline, but he’s not too far gone.
i do think he might actually say things like this, but a lot of what he says he doesn’t really understand or mean. he’s trying to sound smart, or cool, or edgy or whatever, but it’s not really working, and it only makes him look like an asshole. he’s mainly echoing things he’s picked up from his environment, namely the spaces he hangs out in online. in homestuck, every troll is based off of a specific type of internet archetype. (angry screaming guy, leetspeaker, roleplayer, etc.) each of them, at the beginning of act 5, is a parody of different annoying or strange types of people you meet online. this is his.
as for my thoughts on eridan’s character as a whole, as a troll in homestuck, i still don’t think he’s a genuine nazi. i think he’s similar to equius in that, again, he says a lot of things that he doesn’t really fully mean. they’re just ingrained in him due to his highblood upbringing.
i think that something that bears repeating is that all of these characters are 13 years old. i think that hussie did a pretty good job of writing them based on this fact. when you’re 13, you’re pretty much at the peak of insecurity and self-consciousness and desire to seem cool and interesting to others and society as a whole. you’re really just starting to try and explore your identity and establish yourself as your own person. all this considered, you still really don’t know what you’re doing at all when you’re 13. you’re desperate to prove yourself, to seem capable and strong.
i think a lot of the highbloods’ (vriska, equius, gamzee to an extent, eridan) behaviors make sense when you consider their environments and upbringing. they don’t think the awful things they do are actually awful, in fact, this is the behavior that’s expected of them. society’s told them their whole lives that this is the way they’re supposed to act, so they act accordingly. i’m not saying it makes their actions excusable, but i think it makes them make sense, given their circumstances.
sorry if my point started getting away from me at the end there. in conclusion, no, eridan is not a nazi. i think to say so would be a little silly. even the people eridan kills, he doesn’t do so because of their blood color (to my remembrance). he kills them because he perceives them as a direct threat, and because they’re in his way. (and i believe feferi technically attacked him first, right?) the solution he jumps to is violence, because that’s what he’s been accustomed to. it’s the first and easiest thing he can think of.
again, of course this doesn’t excuse his actions; it doesn’t excuse any of their actions, but it does explain them.
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