On the shen jiu in the inventory thing: "SHANG SHIDI LET ME THE FUCK OUT" Five minutes later "actually I'm fine in here theres food and water and it's clean in here and there's no men. Sure shang-shidi is a man but he also appears to be fucked up and weird so it's probably fine." Meanwhile sqh is sweating. How does he get him out. Yqy is in shambles.
"He appears to be fucked up and weird so it's probably fine" iM CRYING that's so true tho
I LOVE the idea that he's just chilling in Qinghuas inventory even though this is NOTHING like anything anyone's ever seen
Qinghua is frantically trying to take him out, Yue Qingyuan is emotionally devastated but also keeps side eyeing Qinghua because he's acting weird too all while Shen Jiu is just
Look Mihawk’s eyes definitely glow in the dark and this fact definitely threw Shanks of the first time he learned it which coincidently was during their *coughs* first time. But it’s kind of hot and he’s grown used to it now……mostly.
Because you know Mihawk is definetly the type of dude to never turn on a light ever and with his propensity for staring unblinkingly and his half hazard middle of the night sleeping habits. It’s a bit of a bit of a problem .
the years Shanks has lost of his life waking up to a floating pair of shimmering golden and ringed eyes staring at him in complete darkness he will never gain back and are best not talked out.
Also imagine if Mihawk is prone to midnight snacking (making up for all the food he doesn’t eat during the day to maintain his vampiric reputation) so many a red haired pirate have woken the ship with Shrieks having stumbled into the very dark kitchen to see a pair of otherworldly eyes completely demolishing a plate of leftovers or an entire charcuterie board staring right into their soul.
Ben and Yasopp have almost shot him multiple times(with only one of those times being on purpose) Many a crew member has solicited Shanks to get his boyfriend exorcised and the ship cleansed. In 2 years the closest Zoro ever came to cutting Mihawk was while blindly flailing his swords around in the dark trying to fend of the kitchen demon that besieged him during his midnight beer run. This will happen every night, they never talk about it. Zoro never figures out it’s Mihawk and is pretty sure the Kitchen is haunted. Won’t keep him from his midnight protein shake (he is no longer allowed beer)
Perona is the only person who is even slightly normal about this (she lived on thriller bark floating pair of eyes in the dark is child’s play) she just switches on the very bright white kitchen lights, effectively blinding Mihawk and leaving his terrible posture and he use of his precious kogatana to eat meatballs exposed to the light. She gets a cup of water turns off the light and leaves. The next day Mihawk buys her a new dress they never speak of this again.
OCEAN. OCEAN. YOU DID THIS BECAUSE MY DUMB SELF STEPPED ON A THUMBTACK DIDNT YOU.MYOURE EVIL. YOURE EVIL.SO EVIL IM GIGGLGINGG SSMILING RUNNING AROUND THE ENTIRE HOUSE.N
i cant even lean on my Really expensive Lamborghini i literally just blew it up. im gonna spontaneously combust . Set aeveryhigh aorund me ablaze. I AM ON FIRE! I AM ON FIRE! OMGGGG ASTRO THATS SI CRAZY😭😭😭😭😭😭 THERES NO FIRE EXTINGUISHER😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 THE ONLY WAY TO PUT IT OUT 𝓲𝓼 𝓽𝓸 𝓴𝓲𝓼𝓼 𝓶𝓮.. YOU HAVE TO SAVE MY LIFE HURRY,!!!!!!!!!!!
he needs to reject me so i can move on. Please. but like reject as in kill me or something because thats never happening.
its a beautiful saturday morning Why would you do this to me. im gonna tweak out for the next hour MINIMUM. Maximum? There is none. HEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYi LITERALLY KEEP FORGETTING WHAT I WAS GOING RO TYPE BECAUSE I SCROLL UP AND SEE HIM AGAIN AND I JUST STARE. AND STARE. LIKE I DONT EVEN HAVE WORDS ANYMORE IM JUST LOOKING. IM JUST LURKING NEAR HIM NOW. I CANT.EXPLAIN? MY . EMOTIONS. WITH WORDS ANYMORE. I JUST CANT DO IT. IM JUST HERE MAN. IM HERE. AND I LIKE ASTRO A NORMAL AMOUJT as you all can tell
i.I BRUISED MY LEG I GIR ROO EXCITED I HIR MY LEG! YEEEEOOUCH!
ok i have more you know how the only 5 chilaios fics on ao3 rn are all from chilchuck's pov well what about how laios feels about chilchuck huh. i think that laios does admire and respect chil personally like he compliments him so genuinely when he pulls off impressive feats (like defeating a mimic by himself or figuring out that those fucked up dungeon frogs' skin could protect them) i think in my sick fucked up little head that laios finds those aspects of chilchuck (outsmarting a monster/learning how to use parts of it for their own advantage) soooo alluring i would read a fic all about how laios realizes he wants to make out sloppy style with chil after those moments i think every time after that they have an encounter with a different monster he is looking intently at chilchuck almost like hes waiting for him to do something impressive yet again like oh nooooo theres a mimic in that other room what do you think we should do chilchuck meanwhile chil is like ??? why are you asking me?? you can literally kill them yourself just fine? and hes like yeah but. i wanna see *you* do it.
I THINK CHILCHUCK'S SIZE ALSO PLAYS A ROLE IN THIS like him overtaking a monster twice his size is so sexy to laios you know that adventure time episode where finn tricks flame princess into fighting ice king for his own pleasure its like that. he wants to see chilchuck commit violence so bad. *pants out of breath like i just said all of this in one sitting without breathing once*
dont fucking tempt me i. have already been thinking about writing snth from Laios' POV ( i jus t have. no confidence in my writing abilities) but i think youre right. chilchucks competency is 100% part of his sexiness and laios knows this. bro is about to pounce.
Kyle plans your conversations. He keeps scripts, and the ones about you are his favorite. They keep him company, what he thinks you might do and say and how you’d smile at him gently soothing him out on missions. He could probably talk about your life, up to marriage and maybe kids, for hours.
What he doesn’t have a script for is you sitting down right besides him at the bar with that expression on your face. Kyle knows he’s been caught out the second you pull out the stool, you’re a creature of habit and you never sit this close to the middle of the bar. It’s Friday night, the night you like to come and have a few cocktails before retiring to your home, and Kyle’s new favorite day of the week. Alcohol shows sides of people hidden to everyone under the sun, and ever since you got those tacky, ugly blinds Kyle has been aching for some vulnerability. Something he can pretend is privately shared between the two of you, shine and clutch close without having to grapple with the guilt of intruding, stepping too far away from what can be waived off.
Maybe it’s the lack of you, the sudden deprivement of something hes quickly coming to cherish as much as the blood in his veins, that makes him sloppy. You’re not as neat as you usually are, messy shirt under a jacket, boot laces untied. Your face is cast in shadow and dim lights, and all Kyle can manage to think about as his eyes trace the agitated crease of your brow is that you look like something that belongs in a museum.
“Who,” you hiss, speaking lowly in tight, furious syllables, “the hell are you?”
It’s said in anger, but the words are for him and that sends a little thrill through him. Kyle cherishes each part of you you give him, like anyone who deserves you should.
Kyle, sweetheart. Your secret admirer. No one special. Your soulmate.
“I’m sorry?” He coughs politely, feigning confusion. Kyle leans awayl trying to sell the image of someone being wary of an angry looking drunk stranger, but he’s already mourning the proximity.
“I know you’ve been following me, asshole.” You don’t let him, half standing to shove your face into his, and he’s more pleased than he should be, but your hands are curling into a fist and you smell like alcohol. “I’ve seen you.”
Shit. Now he couldn’t deny it fully. You couldn’t have had more than a glass, were you drinking at home? The drapes must’ve been deliberate, you trying to cut him out of your life. It sends a pang of hurt in his chest—why do you withdraw so suddenly now? It seems like everything about the world demands him to tug you closer, and now you’re running away?
Kyle averts his eyes, lifting a hand in a placating manner. “I have a generic face.” He lies guilelessly, ignoring how you practically breathe smoke at the deflection. Your rage is incandescent, and as much as Kyle loves to stare into the face of your emotions, he isn’t willing to have you get spooked enough to try anything extreme.
Though, with the way you’re cocking your fist back, you’ve got a different idea in mind. Kyle isn’t too mad at you, he’s happy you’re not that scared of him and he likes the idea of you defending yourself if an actual creep ever showed up. He can work with this, though, and he turns into the blow, taking it poorly on purpose.
It’s not exactly how he wanted to get your number, but he’s willing to take anything he can get.
What ever you do don't think about Percy reading Estelle a little kid version of 'The Odyssey' because that's what Sally read to him but he doesn't want to scare her. Don't imagine Sally looking on with guilt in her eyes cus she HAD to read him the real one so he knew what to expect. Don't think about Sally looking down on her little girl with tears in her eyes cus she doesn't need to worry about snakes in her bed or teachers being Cyclopes. Don't think of Sally seeing Estelle with Paul and having to leave the room cus when Percy was that age they had Gabe. Don't think of the unimaginable guilt that Sally must feel for being relieved that Estelle's biggest battle at 16, is her Dad being her teacher. And whatever you do don't think about Percy feeling like an outsider in his own family even though he gets constantly reassured that he's part of it and loved.
Ich hätte mich nie darauf einlassen sollen einen Minderjährigen eine All-You-Can-Eat-Jahresflatrate gewinnen zu lassen. Nicht nur, dass so ein Teenager fressen kann ohne Ende, er hört im Gegensatz zu Erwachsenen auch nicht auf, ständig sich hier vollzustopfen, wenn er dick und dicker wird. In letzter Zeit animiere ich ihn noch und noch mehr zu essen. Bringt mir das finanziell was? Definitiv nicht, aber es wäre mir eine Genugtuung zu sehen, wie er mit einem Herzinfarkt vom Stuhl kippt. Zumindest wird er, wenn er so weitermacht morbid fettleibig am letzten Tag hier rauswatscheln. Sein Körper endgültig ruiniert.
I should never have agreed to let a minor win an all-you-can-eat annual flat rate. Not only can a teenager eat without end, but unlike adults, he won't stop stuffing himself as he gets fatter and fatter. Lately I've been encouraging him to eat even more. Does that help me financially? Definitely not, but it would give me satisfaction to see him fall off his chair with a heart attack. At the very least, if he carries on like this, he'll waddle out of here morbidly obese on the last day. His body ruined for good.
It hasn’t even been a week since Sanji left and Luffy already nearly DIED by starvation and then ingesting something poisonous. Absolutely fucking unbelievable. How have they survived this long without him