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lailannajacobs · 4 years ago

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Girl Going Nowhere

Pairing: Bucky x fem!reader

Request: Aaaanyways I had a small request about a Bucky x reader fanfic that I was wondering if you could do sometime if you get a break in your busy schedule. Maybe something along the lines of them both being in the avengers and reader has like a huge crush on Bucky but he sees her as a "kid" until boom they have some sorta fancy event where reader turns up lookin like a snacc and Bucky is like o.O when he sees her AND THEN THEY GET TOGETHER AND LIVE HAPPILY EVER AFTER ...

Word Count: 5.1k

Warnings: Little violence, pinch of angst but 99% fluff

A/N: thank you so much @winkwonk123456 I had a blast with this request! This is probably much longer than it had to be, but I couldn’t resist adding in some 2012 avengers type moments! Hope you enjoy, I’d love to know what you think! P.s Italics are flashbacks, all else is present <3

Girl Going Nowhere

“You know, I think you’re getting better at this,” Nat stared down at you, her smirk the only thing you could see.

A groan escaped your lips and you sunk further into the sparring mat. You’d done this enough times to know that you’d find a few new bruises tomorrow but that the worst part was right here, right now, trying to catch your breath.

“No, really,” She continued, “That was a whole minute longer than last time. Anyone else and you would have had them down.”

“Doesn’t feel like it,” You muttered, taking her extended hand.

Straightening you out, she laughed, “You’ve got your first mission in a couple days. Just making sure you’re ready. The more pain-”

“I know, I know,” You interrupted, stretching your neck from side to side, “The more pain I feel here, the less likely I am to be dead out there. Doesn’t make getting pounded into the ground any easier though.”

“But then it would ruin the fun for me,” She grinned, the kind that usually meant you’d be flat on your back within seconds.

The gym doors opened and you both looked up. Bucky and Sam walked in, gym bags slung over their shoulders, already dressed for a workout. They both smiled when they saw the two of you.

“Hey kid, ready for your first mission?” Bucky asked with a pleasant smile.

“Always,” You snapped.

It was a wonder you’d heard anything passed the word ‘kid’. The one syllable, three letter word made you want to punch something. Mainly him. Though half the time you weren’t sure which part of your body you wanted to connect with his. And that was the problem. He saw you as the new recruit, as nothing more than a… than a…you swore internally: a kid. It didn’t matter that you looked the same age or that you were a fully functioning adult, in his eyes, you were just a kid who’d shown up on the compound a year ago - SHIELD’s newest asset. That old fart could go to hell for all you cared.

“You boys had better not be late for dinner,” Nat shot them both a pointed look, “It’s Tony’s idea of a big family dinner while most of us are around and he’s expecting you.”

“Tony’s cooking?” Sam asked incredulously. Nat laughed, steering you toward the door. He grinned, “Yeah, didn’t think so.”

“Just be there!” She called over her shoulder. Then she turned her action to you, winced and then shrugged, “If you need it, come see me, I’ve got concealer that works for that kind of thing.”

And with that cryptic bit, she walked off with a joyful wave. You touched your cheek and winced. Shower first and then you’d deal with the damage done.

“I’m pretty sure I don’t need to tell you this,” Sam stepped onto the treadmill, a devilish smirk on his lips, “But every time you call her that, I’m sure it’s the time she throws a punch at you.”

Bucky started at a slow jog and shot him a grin in response. He didn’t need to explain to Sam that the reason he did it was to make sure she stayed far away from him and all his baggage. They’d gotten too close the first couple weeks after she’d arrived at the compound, and the moment he realized there might be something between them he’d quickly dismissed the thought, starting the whole ‘kid’ charade. He was an old man, out of his time, who’d done far too many terrible things to even consider anything even remotely romantic. Even if it was with another agent who’d seen her fair share of shit and was living the same lifestyle as he was. One who knew who and what he was. One who…

He punched the speed on his treadmill, pumping his legs to keep up with the gruelling increase in pace. He was doing it again. Making excuses for himself - for the future he caught himself imagining from time to time. Calling her ‘kid’ as often as he could was barely working to remind himself that he was better off alone. Not that it mattered all that much. Nowadays, half the time she looked like she wanted to kill him, so even if he did change his mind - which he wouldn’t - he was pretty sure she wasn’t interested.

“She’s going with you on her first mission. Did you ever figure out why Fury recruited her?” Sam asked between puffs of breath.

Bucky stared straight ahead, annoyed that he couldn’t push the treadmill further, “No idea. All I know if that if they waited a year to deem her mission ready, then they would have waited longer if she wasn’t.Though whatever the reason is, it must have something to do with the reason Wanda avoids her like the plague.”

“Well, she’s not me, but I’m sure you’ll be fine with her as your back up,” Sam laughed, though he was fighting so hard for breath it sounded more like a wheeze.

Bucky chuckled, “I can’t get used to having you at my back 24-7. You have to sleep at some point.”

“Unlike you people. All you supers are making me dizzy,” Sam huffed with mock seriousness, “Look at you. Are you even sweating?”

“I’m still waiting on Tony’s new treadmills,” Bucky laughed, slowing the machine, Nat’s warning fresh in his mind.

They kept on in silence for another ten minutes until deciding to call it. Dinner with all the Avengers and their families. Oddly enough, Bucky found that he no longer dreaded this kind of thing.

“What’s going on?” You demanded, looking up at the numbers above the doors that were no longer glowing.

Bucky’s eyes widened a bit as if he’d forgotten you were there but recovered quickly, “Even elevators in a place like this jam from time to time.”

You nodded slowly, silently wishing it would start moving again. You weren’t ready to be stuck in an elevator with a complete stranger - well, a person you’d only spoken to for about a minute. You’d arrived on the compound less than two weeks ago and you’d barely said a word to anyone and that was including Natasha Romanoff who’d been assigned to teach you how to fight and defend yourself. You were not ready for close proximity chitchat.

“You okay in enclosed spaces?” He asked, settling down on the floor and extending his feet.

He looked like he was settling in for a long wait, not one bit bothered by the fact that he was stuck in a hanging box hundreds of feet in the air. Of course, if you were as resilient as he was, you’d be completely at ease as well.

Thankfully, apart from your anxiety at being trapped with someone else, you were pretty calm, and crouched down until your butt was on the floor, your knees tucked tight against your chest. You stared at your knees, half hoping he wouldn’t talk to you and half hoping he would. Although you did it on purpose to keep to yourself, it was undeniably lonely. Maybe you could use a friend…you couldn’t remember the last time you’d had one.

“Just a little warning,” He began, his tone causing you to worry. You hadn’t thought there was anything to worry about, but the way he spoke made you wonder if you maybe there was, “If you ever get trapped in here with Peter, he will most definitely tell you about the time his classmates were stuck in an elevator. Every time.”

You looked up at him, relieved and surprised, “So this kind of thing happens often?”

“Weirdly enough, yeah,” He shrugged, a small smile on his face, “It’s the one elevator in the whole place that never seems to work properly, no matter what they do to it.”

“Would you be able to get us out if this thing goes down?” You were surprised by the question, but you didn’t know much about the others who lived here and the question had come out on its own.

He shrugged again, “I’d like to think so. What about you? Got any skills that’ll get us out of here?”

You clenched your fists, thinking of the pain on the redhead’s face when she had walked into that Hydra base. Controlling your powers wasn’t something you were good at yet and you were avoiding anyone else with the mutant gene until you knew for sure that you wouldn’t hurt anyone else. You’d been relieved to learn that secret serums and alien lifeforms weren’t affected - even though Dr. Banner thought that maybe your abilities could extend to even inanimate objects one day. You weren’t sure you wanted them to. Too many people had gotten hurt. It didn’t matter that they had promised you that you’d only be doing good from now on.

“Forget I asked the question,” Bucky said after your elongated silence. You were about to apologize, but it was as if he knew exactly what you were going to do and he wasn’t having any of it, “Whatever reason you’re here for, I’m sure it’s a good one. It doesn’t matter where you were before this…trust me.”

And by the way he said it, you did. If ghosts were real, you had a feeling you could have seen them hovering around him weights.

“I’ve actually got a more important question to ask you,” He continued.

“What’s that?” You were glad your voice wasn’t shaky.

“You know about Thor’s hammer, right?” Your nod was all he needed to continue, “We’ve got a debate going; if you put it in an elevator and it goes up, is the elevator worthy?”

You raised a brow, not sure if he was being serious or not, and when he smiled, you did too, starting to feel yourself relax for the first time since you got here.

There were three things you knew were about to happen in the next minute and a half. The first was that Clint wouldn’t miss; he never missed. The second was that, immediately afterwards, you’d find a small smirk on Wanda’s face despite her claims that she was not involved and was not paying attention. The third was the the commotion would get the rest of the Avengers, who were still in the kitchen, into the massive living space.

Thor’s booming laughter filled the room, shaking the apple balanced precariously on his head. Lightening crackled at his finger tips, his eyes bright and his stance wide. Loki was in the corner, looking extremely bored as he picked at the grime under his nails, but occasionally he’d glance up, a slight quirk to his lips. Bruce stood quietly on the far end of the room, taking in everything with a slightly worried look on his face. Despite the number of adults in the room, he was the only one who looked relatively responsible. Your eyes kept searching the room for the same person they always did. Sam had his brow raised, arms crossed over his chest as he watched in amusement, and Scott stood by his side, a wide grin on his face. Bucky was nowhere to be seen.

Thor lifted his hand, index finger and thumb touching to create a small circle just above his head, right in front of the apple. No one was worried for anyone’s safety, especially that Dum-E stood nearby, fire extinguisher on hand.

“I thought I was done with parlour tricks,” Clint shook his head as he lined up his shot.

“Come on dad!” His daughter Lila begged, “I told Cassie that you could hit anything!”

Clint couldn’t hold back a smile, “Thanks for the vote of confidence, honey.”

“Are we ready?” Thor laughed, “Because I’m starving!”

“Here we go,” Clint muttered.

Then he released the shot. The moment it flew between Thor’s fingers, lightening cackled, setting the arrow aflame. The arrow split the apple, and still burning, lodged into the wall behind him. The kids burst cheers and Thor’s face split into a a wide grin. Dum - E moved into action. Everyone else, including Wanda, couldn’t help but smile and applaud along with the kids. You relaxed into the wall behind you, days like this making you so thankful that Fury had found you.

“Are you trying to burn the place down before dinner?” Tony asked, strolling into the room, “Because I’m pretty sure a flaming arrow will do it. The kinds of things I have to put up-”

You wanted to follow the rest of what Tony was saying, but all you could see was Bucky who had come in behind with Steve at his side. He smiled and mouthed the words ‘hey kid’ before going off to see Sam. Tearing your gaze away, you managed to catch the end of what Tony was saying, telling everyone that dinner was ready. Everyone else began filing out of the room, but you stayed seated, wondering why you couldn’t seem to behave like a normal person whenever Bucky was around. You knew you’d have to get your act together before the mission or else you’d compromise the whole thing and put everyone in danger.

Bursts of laughter exploded from the dining room and you decided it was time you joined. However, you let Wanda go first, making sure to give her a wide birth as she passed. She’d forgiven you, but you couldn’t say there was anything friendly between the two of you; not that you blamed her. Sam, Steve and Bucky were talking in hushed tones, lagging behind, but you walked away as if you couldn’t care less about him. You had dinner to get to and you were going to enjoy yourself.

“Are you in position?” Bucky asked into the coms.

He looked around the main floor, watching the rich party goers mingle and observe the artefacts at the silent auction. From his position at the top of the staircase, he could see everything except for the one person he was supposed to be on this mission with. Bucky was used to missions where he barely had any information to go on, but he wasn’t used to rely on a person whose abilities were classified - even to him. Fury had told him that it was safer this way. Bucky had had no choice but to believe him. The only consolation was that by the end of the night, he’d know that much more about YN.

He scanned the room for her, but couldn’t find her usual workout attire. Of course, this being a black tie event, she was probably - surely - wearing something completely different, but it was hard to picture her wearing anything else.

“I’m following the target,” Her clipped voice came in through the coms, “He’s alone.”

“Don’t engage. Stand down,” Bucky ordered, taking off in a sprint.

This wasn’t the plan - at least not the plan he’d been given. His heart rate picked up as he made his way to the target’s office. The target - Jackson Cure - was deadly, an inhuman with mind manipulation and telepathy and YN was about to walk in there, alone. He swore and picked up the pace, ignoring the pointed glares in his direction.

He raced up the stairs, going so fast that he almost came face to face with the target himself. Before Bucky could even get a punch in, he lost control of his body. Fear crashed over him. He struggled to regain control, refusing to let something like this happen to him again, but his hand was reaching for his gun and he knew it wasn’t because he was about to shoot the target.

“You’re a strong one,” Cure purred, eyes lighting up at the challenge.

Bucky grit his teeth, fighting a loosing battle. From the corner of his eye, he noticed YN creep up from behind. He tried to warn her, get her to leave before anything happened to her, but his mouth wouldn’t work. He only succeeded in making Cure notice that something was up.

Cure turned and practically laughed when he saw her, “Come to join the fun then?”

She lifted her gun, pointing it at his head.

“I don’t think so, darling,” He grinned, “Why don’t you kill him instead?”

Bucky felt his body still despite his futile attempts to move. The only thing he could do was look at her and try to convey a million different things before she pulled the trigger.

But she didn’t.

“Lie down on the ground and put your hands behind your head,” She snarled, eyes flaring with hatred, “Do it now.”

Cure’s brows furrowed in what seemed like a mix between confusion and concentration.

She clicked the gun, “I said, do it now.”

“Your friend,” He started.

“You won’t do a damned thing to my friend,” She took a step forward, looking like she really would shoot him.

Before Bucky knew what was happening, Cure doubled over, howling in pain. Suddenly, he could move again, sucking in deep breaths of relief. But all he could do was stare dumbfounded at YN, who stood coldly a few feet away from Cure, watching. No, not watching. She was the reason he was in pain.

She stepped forward and his howls turned to groans. He watched as Cure tightened in a ball on the ground, looking like he was about to pass out.

“Sergeant Barnes,” He barely recognized her voice, but somehow it was enough it pull him out of his stupor, “Are you all right?”

He nodded.

“Then I need you to cuff him. Romanoff is waiting on the roof,” She spoke clinically, but her eyes kept darting toward him as if she was worried.

He followed her order, still out of breath and trying to piece his mind back together again. Cure was still in pain, but he couldn’t risk telling her to ease whatever it was that she was doing. Not right now.

When they made it to the roof, Bucky had regained most of his composure, but he noticed YN had sweat dripping down her temple. Cure was cuffed, but they didn’t know if it was safe for her to let go of her hold on him.

Nat slid open the helicopter door, “You can let him go,” She shouted over the sound o the blades, “His abilities won’t work with the cuffs on.”

YN looked skeptical but did as she was told, Cure sucking in a deep breath despite the fact that he was still powerless. She swayed and Bucky shot out his hand to steady her. She only stared at him, a look in her eyes he didn’t think he’d ever begin to understand.

“The limo will be here in a half an hour,” Nat continued, eyes darting between them, “Make sure you’re seen on the way out.”

They both nodded, watching util the helicopter was out of sight.

“Are you okay?” She asked.

He thought so. Though he knew he wouldn’t be is she hadn’t been there. Hell, she’d practically taken care of this whole thing singlehandedly. She may have been the new recruit, but there was no way he could get away with calling her kid anymore. Bucky didn’t know what would have happened if Cure had had the chance to poke around in his head longer than he had. He shuddered at the thought, trying to push it far away.

“I was supposed to have him subdued before you got there,” She continued when he said nothing, “That’s on me.”

Stunned, her realized she was trying to apologize to him. After everything she’d just done for him, she was trying to apologize.

“You saved my life. That’s on you,” He stated firmly, “I can never thank you enough for that, so please don’t apologize.”

She sighed, “Are you sure you’re all right?”

“I’m fine,” He said, turning to face her, “Thanks to you - holy shit.”

He stared at her, at a loss for words. Amidst all the action, he’d never really taken a good look at her. He’d known she was there, but hadn’t needed to know more than that.

“What?” She demanded, voice panicked as she whirled around to find the threat, “Bucky, what?”

He couldn’t help but stare at her in her gown. It was as if every feeling he’d pushed down since the day they’d met came rushing back to the surface, only to mix with the leftover adrenaline to hit him like a tidal wave. YN had always been beautiful, but tonight she was something else, coming through for him with confidence and kindness like he’d never seen at the compound. Bucky also had to admit that he’d always had a soft spot for a woman in a pretty dress.

Yet, all that managed to come out of his mouth was, “You look beautiful,” Which felt kind of lame and very much an understatement.

She stared back at him, an expression on her face he couldn’t read, then looked down at the dress she was wearing.

Finally, she shrugged, “You have Nat to thank for that. She picked it out.”

He extended his arm, trying to sort through all his emotions while not being able to help himself, “A dress is only as beautiful as the woman wearing it.”

His words caught him by surprise, the familiarity of them like a long lost friend he hadn’t seen since the forties. He knew he would never be the person he was before the war, but maybe he could find away to be something else; something different, but just as good.

You were dreading working with SHIELD and living on Tony Stark’s compound. It wasn’t that you wanted to keep being blackmailed by Hydra - working for them against your will - but you were pretty sure these people wouldn’t accept you. They were all heroes. You were…you were a coward who couldn’t fight her way out of a shitty problem.

Fury didn’t say a word. You weren’t sure if it was because small talk wasn’t his thing, if he was ignoring you, or if he was being nice and giving you you space. Either way, you were glad for it. You weren’t sure what to say. After almost killing one of his team members the night they’d raided the Hydra compound you were on, the only thing you’d been able to say had been a string of apologies. The only break in your profuse apologies had been the moment you’d agreed to work for him, both a penance for your actions and a freedom from the situation you’d been stuck in.

When you followed him through a set of clear, double doors, you were hit with the bustle of what felt like a small city. Not only were there soldiers smiling about, but there were women dressed in suits - both regular and some like you’d never seen before - men in jumpsuits, people with clipboards, screens above-head with flashing lights and what appeared to be a mechanical bird swooping precariously in and out of the crowds.

“You can’t be a bazaar half your flock is gone loose!” A laughing voice shouted, “You’re going to have to catch that thing before it pokes someone’s eye out!”

“Shut up and start helping me!” A different, much less amused, shouted back.

You searched for the voices, but couldn’t find the men they belonged to amid the crowd.

Fury muttered beside you, “They’ll both lose an eye if that thing takes out mine.”

You smirked, the action taking you by surprise.

Two men then stumbled into the room, shooing the bystanders out of the way. The crowd parted with little more than an eye-roll . The long haired one raised a gun but didn’t get to fire off a shot.

The man with wings strapped to his back gripped his friend’s arm and glared at him, “You kill that thing, the guys in tech are going to kill you.”

“How do you want to get it then? Because last I checked, you weren’t able to fly this model,” He retorted, shaking him off and taking aim again.

“If one of you fires a damn shot,” Fury warned, his voice no louder than it was before but easily carrying across the room, “I don’t care how accurate it was, you’re going to wish you didn’t.”

In unison, they turned their heads, noticing Fury for the first time. The bird swooped toward them and you almost cried out to warn them, watching as it aimed for the long haired one’s head but his hard shot out, the clang of metal on metal ringing out through the room. You blinked, not sure you’d seen correctly, but knowing in a place like this there was no way you were imagining things.

Wings grinned, noticing you, “See you’ve brought a new recruit.”

They wandered over, blue and brown eyes trained unnervingly on you.

You looked down instinctively at the bracelet they’d given you only a week ago. Judging by the pain free looks on their faces, it was working fine.

“No need to look worried,” Wings shot you another grin, this one more welcoming, “There are only idiots here who sometimes manage to save the world from time to time.”

What little good mood you’d found at watching them chase after that metal bird vanished quickly. None of the work you’d done for Hydra had anything to do with saving lives…And that was the big problem, wasn’t it?

“Maybe she should be worried,” Blue eyes said, and you stopped breathing thinking that he knew who you were and what you’d done, “She’s going to have to work with you and your unruly birds from time to time.”

Wings rolled his eyes, “Wait until she sees the Spiderkid or Lang.

“You’ll be fine here. Trust me," Long-hair shot you a small, knowing smile, that eased the pressure off your chest as he extended his hand, “I’m James and this is Sam. But you can call me Bucky.”

You didn’t know what to think about Bucky’s reaction. You were part worried, part thrilled, and also riding the high that came from finally being able to loosen the cap that you kept on your powers. You didn’t know what the hell to think.

So, arm in arm, you followed him back down to the auction. He was silent the whole way, almost contemplative, so you said nothing. The fury you’d felt at seeing that man get inside Bucky’s head and then try to kill him…It had been so blinding you were surprised you’d managed to keep hold of your powers long enough to keep him alive. You could still feel it simmering beneath the surface, threatening your hard earned control over your ability. The bracelet was in your clutch, but you’d promised yourself you wouldn’t ever need to use it. You never knew who could be in the vicinity and you couldn’t risk what you’d done to Wanda happen tonight.

“Bucky,” You whispered when you walked out onto the quiet sidewalk. You weren’t sure what you wanted to say, his name having slipped out as if on its own.

His gaze found yours, searching as if to make sure you were all right. The look wasn’t the same as the one he’d had on his face earlier, but it still sent shivers down your spine anyways, “YN? Are you cold?”

You shook your head, not sure what to do or say.

He dipped his head, trying to get a better look at your face.

“Are you hurt?” The words were a deep growl, surprising you.

After the way he’d looked at you when you’d saved his life - as if he was truly seeing you for the first time - you were taken back to that moment in the elevator when you’d thought there was something between you. But you pushed the thought away. You were just a kid in his eyes, SHIELD’s newest recruit. Whatever you’d thought you’d seen was only what you were hoping to see there. Nothing more.

“No. No I’m fine,” You muttered, forcing a smile, “The limo’s here.”

Something flickered across his face, but you ignored it, shoving out of his grip to get into the car. You melted into the seat and closed your eyes, leaning your head back against the headrest. You heard him get in and felt the limo take off.

“YN?” He murmured.

You opened your eyes and slide a glance his way, “Yeah?”

“I never did thank you for saving my life.”

You shrugged, “You would have done the same for me.”

“I would have,” He said forcefully, “Every damn time.”

There was something in his voice that made your breath catch in your throat, and you turned so that you were fully facing him. He leaned in closer.

“I mean it,” He whispered.

You felt yourself getting sucked in, but pulled back just in time, “Good thing for you that this kid can take care of herself.”

His brow furrowed, “What I saw out there was the work of a powerful woman who looked absolutely beautiful while being completely badass. You’re no kid, trust me.”

You stared at him, confused. He was telling you the exact opposite of what he’d been telling you for the past several month. It was hard to believe that doing your job could have changed his mind unless…he’d always believed the same thing? You were so confused. You didn’t know if you were simply imagining things or if this was real.

“Exactly,” You said, opting for humour to try and avoid your feelings, “I’m no kid. You’re just old.”

The corner of his mouth lifted and you found yourself being drawn in again.

“Good thing then, that that’s only technically. I’m pretty sure we’re actually the same age,” He whispered.

You were having trouble tearing your attention away from his eyes and murmured, “Why’s that a good thing?”

He answered by sliding his hand around to the nape of your neck and closing the distance so that his lips were on yours.

“You could always wear that dress around the compound, you know,” He joked when he pulled away, fingers trailing over the edge of the material until they rested on your thigh, “Practice fighting while dressed undercover.”

You laughed though the sound was cut off by the feeling of his lips on your neck, “How considerate of you, but I’m going to stick to my usual clothes.”

You felt his smile on your skin, “I’m not good at keeping my eyes off you either way.”

#bucky #Bucky Barnes #james buchanan barnes #bucky fanfic #bucky fluff #bucky fanfiction #marvel fic #MCU fic #fan fiction #fanfic

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johannesviii · 4 years ago

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Top 10 Personal Favorite Hit Songs from 2020

You know, when I finished my latest list and realised every decade had the same pattern and that we were slowly going towards a series of great years for pop, I didn’t realise how good that year would be.

What’s at the top? Am I boringly predictable because I already said I loved that song all the way back in January 2020? Let’s find out.

Disclaimers:

Keep in mind I’m using both the year-end top 100 lists from the US and from France while making these top 10 things. There’s songs in English that charted in my country way higher than they did in their home countries, or even earlier or later, so that might get surprising at times.

Of course there will probably be stuff in French somewhere on this post. We suck. I know. It’s my list. Deal with it.

My musical tastes have always been terrible and I’m not a critic, just a listener and an idiot.

I have sound to color synesthesia which justifies nothing but might explain why I have trouble describing some songs in other terms than visual ones.

So. Uh. How was your 2020?

Mine was actually surprisingly good, considering. I’m lucky enough to have a job that I can partially do from home, and I was extremely paranoid from the get-go and nobody got sick under this roof so far. Turns out I’m even better at my job from home and I got permission to work from home one day per week even after the health crisis is over! My first name was also finally officially approved and I can’t tell you how happy I feel about that. I almost feel bad to have had such a good year considering the circumstances. I feel like an asshole just because I’m happy, haha.

The only frustrating part was that I was supposed to see Hatari in concert in Paris in early April which, as you can guess, was cancelled. I’m not too mad about it though, since their tour was called “Europe will crumble” and the message saying the tour was cancelled started with “since Europe is actually crumbling due to Covid-19″ and that’s hysterical.

Good or interesting albums that came out in 2020 now, let’s see.

Nightwish released Human/Nature, which was a huge letdown compared to their previous album, but I will relisten to it at some point to make sure I wasn’t just in a bad mood that day.

The Birthday Massacre released Diamonds, which might be their weakest album since their debut, but contained some real gems (I listened to The Last Goodbye on a loop, it floored me. Flashback and Enter are also very good).

The 1975 released Notes On A Conditional Form, and let’s be real, it’s a f█cking mess. You could cut half the tracks and end up with an excellent album, but as it is it’s like, yes, a collection of notes ; however there’s some truely excellent shit on it (see unelligible songs).

Thanks to a friend on a discord server I was exposed to Dorian Electra’s music and I haven’t been quite the same ever since. I’m so happy to be alive to see other enbies making such great music with an insanely good aesthetic surrounding it and asking so many interesting questions about gender. Also the arc the ‘gentleman’ character goes through over the course of the entire tracklist of the 2020 My Agenda album is absolutely hilarious, don’t @ me.

I also discovered 100 Gecs this year. Why are most of you guys saying it’s unlistenable garbage. It’s just as abrasive and over the top as industrial music is, but with none of the edginess or drama. I love it. What the hell. But yeah Tree of Clues was released this year. Good.

Speaking of industrial, in March 2020 Nine Inch Nails were like “hey remember when we released Ghosts I-IV a decade ago entirely for free and how amazing that was? Well we’re all in lockdown and bored as hell so here’s Ghosts V-VI and it’s also free. Enjoy” and I f█cking died instantly. And it’s even better than I-IV. What the hell was that year

Jonsi released Shiver. It’s strange and highly experimental. I’m pretty sure it’s a good thing I was into hyperpop this year, otherwise going from his previous material straight to this album would have been brutal.

Yadda yadda yadda After Hours by the Weeknd good yadda yadda.

I’ve joked about that already but if you had told me in 2019 that 2020 would have fires, a pandemic, riots, monoliths appearing and disappearing, and also a super good Machine Gun Kelly album, guess which part I would have found the most ridiculous. But yeah uh. Tickets to my Downfall good

So uh this year I tried to listen to some hyperpop and liked it a lot, and I also dipped my toes timidly into screamo and listened to Svalbard, who released When I Die this year, and the entire album was a very beautiful, very intricately decorated punch to the face. It sounds like God Is An Astronaut except with a shit ton of yelling. I love it. Open Wound is my favorite track on it.

But no, despite all of this, my album of the year was from a band I had never even heard about before that year, called Spanish Love Songs. The album is titled Brave Faces Everyone and it’s line after line after line of extremely relatable generational angst but yelled with complete sincerity and it’s so propulsive and energetic you can’t help but feel both exhausted and ready to fight the entire universe. I don’t know how it works, but it’s incredible. The entire album is wonderfully brutal, so it’s kind of difficult to pick my favorite songs on it, but Beachfront Property and the title track stand out.

Unelligible songs, now, and there’s, uh, quite a few of them too so I’m also gonna use bullet points. Good lord this post is gonna be long.

First, let me say I have literally no idea why Midnight Sky by Miley Cyrus wasn’t a bigger hit. It’s not on the year-end US top 100 and it feels extremely wrong. Would have made it to #4 on this list otherwise.

I still entertain the vague hope that stuff from Machine Gun Kelly will chart higher in 2021 but I doubt it will happen so I might as well tackle it now and say that Bloody Valentine and especially Forget Me Too are both excellent and that it’s a shame radios aren’t playing them more often.

Heaven by the late Avicii featuring Coldplay should have charted in 2019 and still didn’t chart in 2020 and that’s a real shame.

If the world was a bit less unfair, Lovesick Girls by Blackpink would have been a hit rather than the awful Ice Cream.

One day I will stop complaining about my bafflement concerning the lack of mainstream pop charts success of The 1975. Today is not that day. I just love how they keep making songs about extremely awkward relationships full of weird details, and I haven’t grown tired of that yet. So yeah If You’re Too Shy is about a guy who’s crush is asking him to get naked on Skype in his hotel room and he’s, uh, not too sure about that idea.

And Me & You Together is about a guy who never finds the right moment to tell his best friend he’s in love with her, and he manages to do so at the end and it’s cute as hell. My fave part is “I'm sorry that I'm kinda queer / It's not as weird as it appears / It's 'cause my body doesn't stop me (Stop me) / Oh, it's okay, lots of people think I'm gay / But we're friends, so it's cool, why would it not be?”. Relatable as f█ck.

And now for an international hit that should have been bigger in the US and/or in my country but wasn’t: Head & Heart by Joel Corry and MNEK.

I’ve heard Nos Célébrations by Indochine extremely often on French radio for months now so I was very surprised to see that it didn’t crack the local year-end list. What happened.

I can finally hear the appeal of Bring Me The Horizon. It took me ages. And also Death Stranding. The song Ludens isn’t in the game per say, but it’s among the ones you can pick to broadcast briefly when people drive by your constructions, and long story short it's been living rent-free in my head for months now.

Phew.

It’s time for a round of Honorable Mentions for elligible songs, containing a couple of guilty pleasures, which is saying something considering the kind of shit I put on some of my previous lists.

Ne Reviens Pas (Gradur et Heuss l’Enfoiré) - Heuss is a French artist that kept baffling me while making my lists for the previous years, and I was like “??? ok, that’s it then, I guess I’m getting too old to get what teenagers find funny”. This one worked for me, though. And the music video doesn’t hurt. Really dumb and really fun.

Adore You (Harry Styles) - Perfectly good little pop song, very pleasant to listen to, never outstayed its welcome for me.

Mood (24kGoldn) - This doesn’t sound like a very good relationship, my dude, but that’s still a super pleasant song.

WAP (Cardi B & Megan Thee Stallion) - This song is absolutely hilarious and I will hear no argument from any of you.

Control (Zoe Wees) - Was clearly a hit here. Should have been even bigger though. What a powerful but comfy voice. If I had better taste it would be on the list.

Hot Girl Bummer (Blackbear) - I. Uh. Listen. I keep saying I have bad taste and nobody believes me. Do you believe me now. But yeah. “F█ck you, and you, and you~, I hate your friends and they hate me too” is gonna pop in my head every single time someone is being a jerk anywhere near me now. It’s been happening all year already. Someone trashed my documents at work? Someone isn’t wearing a mask in public? That guy has filled his car with rolls of toilet paper? Brain goes “F█ck you, and you, and you~”. Every. Single. Time.

Come & Go (Juice WRLD & Marshmello ) - Damn, that’s a pretty good little song. I’ve seen plenty of people saying it’s ruined by the drop, but may I remind you I’m the person who loves Blue by Eiffel 65 with all my heart. If the song was ramping up consistently until the end instead of ending like that, it would have made the list, definitely.

And now, the actual list. This one actually feels pretty solid, I genuinely like everything on it, there’s no filler here for once.

10 - The Box (Roddy Rich)

US: #3 / FR: #23

Now this is a weird case, because for the longest time I couldn’t figure out why this song was so popular and I was completely neutral about it. Then, one morning in September, my mental jukebox (which always, always puts a song on a loop in my head when I wake up) decided to play it. And I was like oh wow?? I never noticed the atmosphere in that song before? It’s so great. And that hook too. Let’s listen to it.

So yeah, I don’t know what happened. It just clicked one day and everything fell into place, I guess.

9 - Alane (Wes & Robin Shulz)

US: Not on the list / FR: #93

Come on. You can’t do a remake of one of my previous #1 songs and let it chart in 2020. That’s cheating. Even with this subpar drop, I have to put it on the list, now.

I’ve already said my piece about the original, so I’m just going to send you back to my 1997 list.

8 - Kings and Queens (Ava Max)

US: Not on the list / FR: #76

[BBC documentary voice] After Lady Gaga decided to make piano balads and left her musical niche vacant, Ava Max quickly took her place as the top predator pop diva. Even after Lady Gaga was re-introduced to her natural habitat in 2020, she still hasn’t fully recovered in Europe, where Ava Max still reigns supreme on the charts -

(tldr I think it’s hilarious that this isn’t on the US Billboard while Lady Gaga isn’t on the French year-end top 100)

7 - Roses (Saint Jhn & Imanbek)

US: #19 / FR: #3

What an earworm. It doesn’t even bother trying to have an intro or an outro, so it loops almost perfectly. It’s like entering a party that started long before you arrived, and it will go on long after you leave it to go back home. Kind of hypnotic in a way.

And yes, my mental jukebox was very fond of using it to wake me up this year, so this is another song that’s here almost solely because of that.

6 - Physical (Dua Lipa)

US: Not on the list / FR: #69 (hehehe)

“Hey I’m not that old” says the guy who’s definitely a sucker for this kind of retro throwback that was so popular this year. Oh well.

I don’t have anything interesting to say about this one, though. Apart from the fact that everyone seems to have a different fave song on that album. Guess that’s quality for you.

5 - Rain on Me (Lady Gaga & Ariana Grande)

US: #48 / FR: Not on the list

That is far from being Lady Gaga’s best song, but it was a joy to listen to everytime it was on the radio anyway. Also Ariana Grande has surprisingly good chemistry with Gaga! This year was full of strange duets mostly made for commercial reasons, and this one isn’t an exception, but unlike a lot of them, it really, really works.

4 - Dynamite (BTS)

US: #38 / FR: Not on the list

I’m still not 100% sold on k-pop even if a ton of it sounds super good, but come on. Even if some bits of this song (especially the beginning of the second chorus) sound a bit like they were made on autopilot, it still sounds just as happy and fun several months after I first heard it and I never got tired of it. That’s quality. You hear it and you can’t help but tap your feet and smile.

Actually, I’m sure there’s people somewhere that don’t smile when they hear this song. And they must be avoided at all costs.

3 - Godzilla (Eminem ft Juice WRLD)

US: #62 / FR: Not on the list

What are you doing so high on this list, old man. Why are you still here in the year 2020. I thought we left you in the previous decade. Who gave you the right.

I’m gonna tell you who did, and it’s actually Juice WRLD. Because that chorus is incredible, and like a lot of people I’m pissed off because the guy died super young and this shit shouldn’t happen to anybody. No, his early material wasn’t great, but I’m sorry I’m gonna say it again: have you heard this damn chorus? It’s suspenseful and dark, it’s got this lowkey menacing quality, it’s an earworm and a half, and it’s more convincing in like six lines than Eminem’s own flexing is in the entire song.

The beat is extremely good as well, and the flow, obviously, impressive. The weakest link is Eminem’s writing, which is as usual full of puns and weird wordplay, except here a lot of it isn’t great, and that last ultra fast part at the end is technically impressive but it also drives the song up a cliff and stops it dead in its tracks once it’s over. But frankly the lines fly by so fast it’s difficult to be too annoyed by them.

Can I sincerely put this extremely flawed song so high on my list? A better question would be “did I spend hours trying to learn how to sing this shit without choking on my own spit?”. The answer is yes. To both.

2 - Heartless (The Weeknd)

US: #28 / FR: Not on the list

I’ve said it on my 2015 and 2016 lists already, but just for the record I’ll say it again: it took me ages to like The Weeknd, mostly because I found most of his songs fairly boring, or disliked the lyrics, or both. Also I never really liked the general vibe of his “sexy” songs like The Hills, they felt dark but in an unpleasant creepy way. Felt like miserable hedonism, if that makes sense.

So, because I’m a person with extremely consistent and logical tastes, here’s the exact same shit he was making before, except that this time I absolutely adore it.

What is he doing differently that makes the whole After Hours album click for me whereas almost all of his previous material failed to do so? Is it the energy? Is it the reverb? Is it the fact that the narrator sounds properly unhinged and, frankly, scared to be spiralling out of control? Why are the colors so beautiful yet full of anxiety? Why is that bridge so fantastic? How can you make your voice look like a glowstick in the dark?

I give up. I have no clue. At least I’m done talking about-

Oh.

1 - Blinding Lights (The Weeknd)

US: #1 / FR: #1 (listen sometimes something’s just that good, ok)

Surprise. Or not.

Wow, look at that, Johannes has put this year’s number one pop song at number one on their personal playlist. The audacity. The edge. What a hot take.

I discovered that song when it first came out at the end of 2019 and I adored it instantly. And I was so scared it wouldn’t be a hit. Which means I’m a f█cking dumbass considering it ended up breaking all sorts of records in 2020. But what can I say, overplay can be a blessing when you love a song that much.

Like every single song I put at number one on one of my lists, I will draw this one at some point and you will understand how incredibly satisfying it is to listen to a song called Blinding Lights, talking about city lights looking blurry when you’re driving at night, while looking itself like a bunch of blurry city lights passing by super fast. Perfect in every way.

Also it sounds exactly like A-ha, and that never hurts.

See you next year! Pretty sure it will be even better music-wise.

#Johannes’ bad not good pretty terrible music lists #music #long post #eye contact tw

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atamascolily · 5 years ago

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lilyliveblogs “terminator 2″ for the first time, part 2

When we last left off, I was a pile of shipper goo, so time to get back to the movie.

(Part one here)

Someone -- the female doctor we saw before who looks kinda like Sarah? -- watching the video, smoking. I think I can see how Sarah is going to escape now. Oh, wait, it's Sarah, with Dr. Silbermann, watching herself on screen. The two asshole guards are in the background. Her hair's combed. She's subdued. Silbermann is still a jerk.

She wants to see her son. Silbermann's not going to let her, is he? Asshole. She denies crushing a Terminator, their existence, claiming Cyberdyne covered up the evidence. Cut to '90s computer nerds in their cubes, doing experiments that are probably going to trigger Judgment Day. Like you do.

They're doing experiments on "it," and new employee wants to know where "it" came from, so Dyson the manager can tell the audience. "Don't ask," is the answer. Everyone's wearing clean suits, which can't be good. There's a door with two keys that needs two people to open it. Yeah, this really can't be good.

Showdown at the Cyberdyne factory with whatever Terminator goes rogue in here??

Cyberdyne has built a safe for that one little fragment they got from the original Terminator... maybe there are more in different jars; it's a really big vault. Yup, there's the arm. The manager stares at it, and you can see the muscles in his cheek twitch as he contemplates it. He's probably going to die by strangulation at the hands of the Terminator if this movie keeps up with its dramatic ironies.

Of course Silbermann won't let Sarah see her son, so she tries to strangle him with his own tie.

Arnold on a motorcycle spies John Connor on a motorcycle, and the game is on!!

I'm like... 90% certain that's the Los Angeles River that John Connor is cycling down... because it's channeled and running through LA and barely has any water in it and everybody LOVES to film there... going to wiki that later...

Fake police officer asking girls for info about John. They're also delightfully '90s. John is an the arcade, delighting in his ill-gotten funds.

Terminator has disguised his gun as a... box of roses? Did I see that right?

John is playing a fighter simulation that is SO MUCH A CALLBACK TO THE OPENING SCENE WITH ALL THE SHIPS TRYING TO KILL THE HUMANS.

The police dude ASKS THE PUNK FRIEND shows him John's photograph, and the friend says "Nah, I don't know him," BECAUSE HE KNOWS BETTER THAN TO TRUST THE COP. Of course this gets John's attention and they run. And then the friend tries to point the cop in the other direction, but the cop just shoves him aside.

(I'll say this much for the punk friend: he tried. He was a good friend.)

LOL, the fact that John Connor knows better than to trust cops is what saves him. Otherwise, he'd've been a sitting duck. Except he runs right into Arnold...

Arnold flips over the rose box, revealing the gun, and it looks like all hope is lost as the cop comes around the corner... and Arnold tells John to get down and shoots at the cops. His first line in the movie.

When this movie first came out, I bet the audience FLIPPED THEIR SHIT at this twist, but I was a) kinda tangentially aware of it from pop cultural osmosis and also b) that fake cop guy was HELLA SUSPICIOUS, so I'm just like... yeah!!! Because the only way to top being hunted by Arnold was to either a) BE HUNTED BY MULTIPLE ARNOLDS, or b) HAVE ARNOLD ON YOUR SIDE, and of course they went with the latter, because WHY NOT?

the cop's hit but gets back up, John is freaked out, and we the audience realize SOMETHING'S UP. A poor bystander gets murdered as the Terminator uses himself as a human shield to save John, who is screaming...

Arnold busts him into the voltage room out of the way and we have a Terminator on Terminator shoot-out, which is kinda incredible, except that Arnold has a bigger gun, so he gets to keep shooting while the police dude tries to recover from the impact.

That moment where the bullet holes are all silver-y as the police guy re-heals himself, and the CGI is obviously early '90s, but still quite effective and horrifying. And then he gets back up and they start grappling and going through walls AND NOW THEY'RE IN THE '90S MALL, OH MY GOD.

John Connor, not surprisingly, gets the fuck OUT. I wonder if Sarah told him what the Terminator looks like, and if he's surprised to see it defend him?

THE LIQUID METAL TERMINATOR LOOKING AT THE SILVERY-SKINNED MANNEQUINS IN THE MALL DISPLAY OH MY GOD.

LOL random dude snapping photos with his SLR he just happens to be carrying around.

John's motorcycle won't start for reasons of DRAMA, lol.

God, this new Terminator can run freakishly fast, it's inhuman.

Of course no one is going to question a cop chasing anyone, sigh...

(I feel like this movie works eerily well for social commentary in 2019 on SO MANY LEVELS.)

The running terminator runs up to a moving truck and tosses out the driver and keeps driving... wow.

ok, this is all great, but I really want more Sarah, where is Sarah in all this, will she ever talk to another woman in this movie PROBABLY NOT. How about more Kyle Reese flashbacks/dream sequences, can we have those? I am but a simple soul.

Okay NOW there's a chase scene in the Los Angeles riverbed.... that little tiny rivulet in the midst of all that concrete is the river. SOB.

Well, I gotta hand it to the human resistance for sending a Terminator after another Terminator, but it also works because JOHN CONNOR LIVED THROUGH THE EXPERIENCE AND REMEMBERS WHAT THE HELL HIS FUTURE SELF DID... timey-wimey paradox ball...

OH MY GOD THAT LEAP AS ARNOLD'S MOTORCYCLE LEAPS INTO THE RIVERBED. No wonder this movie is so frikkin' famous.

John Connor's bike getting run over by the truck is SO a callback to that tiny little toy truck getting run over by the Terminator in T1...

I like how the police Terminator is so focused on John Connor to the exclusion of ignoring the other Terminator unless he's actively in the way. The intensity in his blue-eyed stare is FANATICAL and inhuman and I love it because it's so gosh darn creepy.

Arnold shoots out the truck's tires, and it catches on FIRE. i love how arnold is prepared to shoot anything that comes out of the flames, but they've bought themselves at least a little time. Of course the CGI silver man comes out of the flames as soon as they leave and melts back to normal. He looks like the frikkin' Oscars statue, only silver.

Even his clothes regenerate back on, which raises interesting and troubling questions as to WHY since he couldn't just re-generate his clothes back on when he came out of the sphere, he had to steal them. I have no clue why this is.

Of course, Arnold and John stop in an alleyway to have their conversation. JOHN KNOWS THIS IS A TERMINATOR, OH MY GOD. (Do you think he feels bad for bad-mouthing Sarah earlier now??)

I think Arnold's talked more in this scene than he did in the entirety of T1, lol. The irony of him being John's father-figure now is just priceless, really.

John handles this much better than Sarah in T1, precisely because this is pretty much EXACTLY WHAT HIS MOM'S BEING TELLING HIM FOR AGES, so at least he has a FRAMEWORK for weird shit like this.

John Connor fighting alongside his own father and re-programming a Terminator to BE HIS OWN ADOPTED FATHER FIGURE OH MY GOD. No wonder he's so fucked up.

Arnold: "The T-1000 would definitely try to re-acquire you there." John: "You sure?" Arnold: "I would."

BAM. That's cold. I love it.

They go to a phone booth, and John doesn't have any quarters because he used them all at the arcade. He's going to try to warn his foster parents because he's not a complete asshole, but I... don't think the T-1000 is interested in killing them? Like, they already cooperated with this dude because he was in uniform. John doesn't seem to GET that not everybody responds to police the way he does.

Arnold slamming the machine to get more quarters is AMAZING and the look on John's face is PRICELESS. Also, parallels to his robbing the ATM earlier...

John's foster parents have a German shepherd that won't stop barking, oh this isn't good... the foster dad doesn't like the dog, which is further proof he's an asshole.Oh, wait, it’s John’s dog, this is probably the same dog we saw with Sarah at the end of T1 or its successor, ahhhhhhhh.

I really feel for Janelle. I feel like she's stuck in a relationship with this asshole Todd, and she deserves better and she's probably going to die, and I'm gonna feel bad about it.

Then we hear a gun cock, and she sticks her arm out, and we realize that holy shit, it's the Terminator mimicking Janelle's face as well as her voice, just like the Terminator did with Sarah's mother in T1, and we realize THAT's why she's being so OOC to John over the phone...

Arnold takes over the call and starts mimicking John's voice. John just stares. I think he's starting to get it.

The T1000 doesn't know the name of the dog. Arnold hangs up and tells John his foster parents are dead. Well, fuck. At least Janelle is dead. Too much to hope that the T1000 didn't just tie her up in the spare bedroom and Todd will find her later after "Janelle" goes to look for John? Sigh.

Nope. No luck. Todd is dead and the T1000 has shifted its arm to be a FRIGGIN' SWORD. Fuck, I didn't know they could do that.

This is supposed to be played as black comedy, but it's just horrific, really, even if the dude was an asshole.

Okay, I get it, the T1000 didn't steal the original cop outfit, he just mimicked it? along with the appearance? That's why he only took the gun. Only the earlier models needed to actually steal clothes.

Oh, good, we cut to Arnold explaining all this to John. Thanks, Cameron!

Oh, and now the T1000's going to kill the dog, right? Because it can. Sigh. And the dog's name is on the collar, so it knows that John knows that it wasn't really Janelle on the phone OR it was talking to a Terminator instead. Clever. Poor doggie. IT WAS TRYING SO HARD. IT DESERVED BETTER.

Sarah is being shown photos of the original Terminator from T1 from the security footage at the police station. Apparently, they saw him on mall footage, too. The police are mad that Sarah has no reaction and I'm like... you spent years telling her she was crazy, and NOW you want stuff from her?? Sigh. Is this the drugs that are responsible for her apathy or is it something else? I think she's contemplating her next move...

Silbermann being an ASSHOLE about it...

Honestly, not sure I blame Sarah for not cooperating given how she's been treated thus far... she knows from experience that even the most well-meaning officers are functionally useless against a Terminator because they don't really GET IT.

But she gets a paper clip. And knowing Sarah, that's all she needs to pick a lock and GTFO.

John says he grew up in Nicaragua as Sarah studied from paramilitary officers throughout Central and South America. He uses the word "shack up," which implies Sarah traded lessons for sex, but I hope... she found some sort of comfort there? It's clear from her hallucination she still desperately loves Kyle. SOB.

John realizes he's been an asshole about Sarah all this time because she WAS RIGHT ALL ALONG. The whole theme of this series is that pretty much everyone except for Kyle TOTALLY BELIEVED SARAH WAS CRAZY, so it's nice to see John finally back on track again. He's younger, so he hasn't been indoctrinated into the patriarchy quite as hard as everyone else in this movie.

of course they're going to go try to bust her out, but she might be out on her own by the time they get there...

But of course the T1000 is going to try to get her so he can copy her and he's going to kill her after that, because that's standard operating procedure. I'm not sure how a T101 would necessarily know that, but maybe he ran into some in the future before he was sent back? Whatever, it sounds plausible.

"Fuck you! She's a priority to me!" YEAH, JOHN, YOU TELL 'EM!!

I like how all these random muscle dudes are all coming over to investigate when John starts shouting about being kidnapped... only to be so confused when he blows them off. I'm sure the T1000 will be around to question them later, of course.

Oh, T101 is programmed to obey John Connor... even the younger version. LOLOLOLOL.

John is such a little shit. YOU CALLED THOSE PUNKS OVER TO HELP YOU, WHY ARE YOU BEING SUCH AN ASS NOW? All you had to do was say "Look, sorry, just a misunderstanding, we're good," and MOVE ON instead of this Macho power trip.

(I take back what I said about John and the patriarchy, btw.)

Oh my god, the random dude who tried to help his friend gets SHOT, WTF JOHN, THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT, YOU STARTED THIS!!!

In which John Connor learns that Terminators are NOT toys. DAMN STRAIGHT YOU LITTLE PUNK.

Of course the police can get into the state mental hospital without question. The guard doesn't even check ID or ask questions, just waves him through. (It probably saves his life, though.)

AAAAAHHHH, the creepy guard is assaulting Sarah when she's strapped down eww gross please no. I suppose I should be grateful it wasn't anything more graphic than him licking her face. She can't react because she's got the paper clip in her mouth.

(Kyle Reese would be so proud of her right now.)

Ahh, it's night, but everything's so brightly lit. This is going to be freakin' beautiful action scene.

Sarah ties her hair back! This is a symbolic gesture, of course, and a practical one, but also a huge question for me: what is she using for a hair tie? No way they gave her one... what is she improvising with?

AHHHH THE T1000 IS IN THE FLOOR HOLY FUCK THAT'S CREEPY. And that's how he acquired the guard when the guard walked over him. WOW.

So the gun on his hip when he originally shifts is a fake? It's part of him- because the T1000 can't make weapons. So he has to take the guard's gun. I think that's what happened?

It's going to be really hard for me to mourn when that asshole orderly that's assaulted Sarah gets what's coming to him. The only question is whether Sarah's going to get him first.

GOD SARAH CONNOR KICKING ASS IS SO SATISFYING. First the dude who assaulted her, and then Silbermann. Karma's such a bitch, isn't it?

John in his naivete order the T101 not to kill anybody, so he just shoots the guard in the legs instead. John, you'd better be more careful with your wording there....

Oh, goody, another underground parking garage...

Sarah comes face to face with the T101... awkward. She runs away before she sees John, only to get tackled. But the T101 comes to her rescue.

The female guard is the only one to bother him by knocking his shades off, lol.

AAHHHHHH THE TERMINATOR TELLS HER WHAT KYLE REESE SAID TO HER BECAUSE ADULT JOHN CONNOR TOLD HIM IT WAS THE ONLY WAY TO GET HER TO TRUST HIM (and also a freakin' great callback!!!)

Silbermann is watching the whole thing go down, he's probably going to spill it all to the T1000, of course...

Of course the T1000 just walks through the bars. Holy shit Silbermann is never going to get over the fact that Sarah was right all along. This is going to totally break him. Either that, or he'll double down on it.to save face. The only reason he survives is because he stays close to the wall and nobody cares enough to stop and deal with him.

AHHH, THE CGI WHEN HIS HEAD SPLITS OPEN IS BOTH TOTALLY FAKE AND ALSO HELLA CREEPY AND SILBERMANN IS WATCHING ALL OF IT, THEY'RE TOTALLY GOING TO LOCK HIM UP AFTER THIS OH MY GOD, KARMA.

Like, the uncanny valley of '90s CGI totally WORKS here, because it's just so fucking creepy. But it's also another sign that this is action and not horror, because action is less focused on blood and guts and gore--the reality and effects of violence.

Oh, good, they steal a car, because they weren't all going to fit on the motorcycle.

The T1000 has given up all subtlety now, and is just a giant silver amorphous human now. Oh, wait, now they ran out of money and he's human again.

LOLOLOLOL Sarah and T101 making John reload in the back seat because OF COURSE HE KNOWS HOW TO DO THAT, HE'S SARAH'S KID.

Sarah Connor is in her friggin' ELEMENT NOW, boys and girls.

god, it's like crossing the Terminator with Freddie Krueger or something (I almost typed "Freddie Mercury," and that's an interesting slip, given how much like mercury the silver goo reminds me of...)

Ahhh, Sarah hugs John and then lectures him for being stupid and reckless, and John just wants love and support... awwwww, he's trying so hard. I love Sarah, and she loves her son, but they don't always connect...

John doesn't want his mom or the T101 to see him crying, because patriarchy. Sigh.

The T101 sewing Sarah up is such a delicious callback to T1 on so many levels. And then she sews HIM up, oh my god.

BRAIN SURGERY ON A TERMINATOR, WOW.

The CPU of a Terminator is what's in the lab at Cyberdyne that they're experimenting on... which is going to become the core of Skynet... NO WONDER IT TRIES TO KILL EVERYONE, IT'S A FUCKING TERMINATOR AT HEART, IT'S ONLY DOING WHAT IT WAS PROGRAMMED TO DO!!!!

(this explains SO MUCH, honestly)

I wish John asserting his independence was NOT another example of a man telling Sarah Connor what to do, thank you very much. And I hate how she's literally relegated to the back seat, ugh. This is a great example of how horror tropes are more feminist-friendly than action.

John deigning to give his mother money is the most obnoxious thing ever, good for Sarah snatching it out of his hand, counting it, and handing him back a handful. We're supposed to find him endearing and relatable and I just keep wanting to smack him for his sexist bullshit.

Children playing with fake guns at the gas station, like that isn't symbolic of anything. John's seen too much now to take it lightly. Compare the children playing on the playground earlier in the movie with this.

wow, I’m still only halfway through the movie, who knew this was so deep

#Movie Reviews #terminator 2 #terminator

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lacklusterswirl · 5 years ago

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Thatcher and... ?

Let’s be honest, my title abilities are poor at best lol.

So this is a continuation of a short fic I posted a while back about Thatcher and possible death. This is kind of an aftermath of that fic. (and I know I haven’t posted any fanfic in a while, forgive me, I got reabsorbed in my original stuff.) It’s kinda sad and reminisces a lot but has a happy ending (imo) (1.8k words)

It’s based off of and includes the lyrics of You by Keaton Henson. It’s a really moving (?) song so prepare yourself if you haven’t listened to it already :)

Warnings: (Mentions/implied for all at least) death (of friends/family), dementia, injury, fighting, gun fights, canon typical violence, and mass violence (bartlett u)

If you must wait…

A quick mission. That was all. After a training accident, he was taken off the roster and sent back home to recover. So, Thatcher sat on the couch with his mother’s arms around him as he awaited news. His best friend, brother in arms, was on that squad. They were unbeatable together.

Unbeatable is a strange word, no? It was supposed to mean victorious, impossible to defeat. The image of his friend at the end of the mission with a new medal and a new smile that just said that it went alright. That’s who they were… together. And Thatcher saw what the issue was now. He wasn’t there to prevent his friend from getting shot in the leg, leaving him stranded in enemy territory as his squad was massacred.

Unbeatable.

Yet that very man was still in that casket, arms on his chest, and eyes closed, draped in a flag.

… wait for them here in my arms as I shake.

If you must weep…

The ocean was known for many things. Thatcher sipped on his beer as he rocked with the waves. After the mission, he wasn’t the same. His mother passed, his father didn’t recognize him, and more recently, his wife had left him, saying that she couldn’t take it anymore.

Take what? Surely it must’ve been the money issue. Maybe a personality clash. But it couldn’t have been because of… what did she call it? It couldn’t have been because he was “obsessed.” It was a job – one he took seriously. That was all. He wasn’t obsessed with it, but he couldn’t stop certain flashbacks, certain triggers, certain emotions that refused to leave him alone when he slept at night.

That was all… But that couldn’t be helped.

Right? There was no other option – no other choice for him in his life. He took the chance to leave his home, he took his opportunities; he took what was in front of him like any other human was. And he was human.

… do it right here in my bed as I sleep.

If you must mourn, my love…

He still remembers that day, to this day. He remembers the smoke, the screams, the gunshots, the blood. All of it. It will never leave him, being on par in horror levels with the wars he’s been a part of except those fights were between those who knew why they were there. It was a battle. Not a massacre.

And even though he knows that it went well, that they did all that they could, that only Rainbow could’ve helped, he can’t help but feel a pit in his stomach, one that threatens to – no, does swallow up his thoughts and starts asking what if’s.

What if they cleared faster?

What if they could evacuate earlier?

What if the terrorists were caught before they even entered the US?

What if they could’ve gone into one of the labs and crushed the project before it began?

What if?

And that’s where Sledge found him. Pacing on the roof, and glaring at the stars as though they could’ve prevented it all.

… mourn with the moon and the stars up above.

If you must mourn…

Sledge was a good leader. One that takes his time with all his teammates – not just the weakest – and makes sure that they’re all alright. He is one that understand unity and team cohesion like it was as easy as reciting the alphabet. He knows how to talk and hold a meaningful, helpful conversation like it was as natural as eating or breathing to him.

And know best he does. It’s as clear as the scowl on Thatcher’s face while he’s being dragged to an empty office.

“What’s on yer mind?”

“Nothin’”

“Mike.”

A sigh. “Just a little worried that we’ve seen this before. That’s all.”

…Don’t do it alone.

If you must leave…

The conversation from the night before was not repeated as Thatcher was getting strapped and ready for their next mission. It was not repeated again as he gave his briefing and walked out of the room. And it was definitely not repeated right before the initial attack.

The next thing he remembers is walking into a dark building. Twenty-two kilos of cocaine, ready for sale, and one of those kilos contains a very special message. One crime hidden in another. It was here, in the shadows, where Thatcher could finally forget about his past.

It’s hard to reminisce on the past when your future was in danger.

He has a purpose in life. The same one he’s had since eighteen.

Two shots to the right, and a foot disappeared behind a shelf, though the shadow was still there. That was easy, two steps forward and turn to the right. One shot to end a life.

That was simple. One for one.

Except that the one shot could also mean something else.

There was a spray of gunfire underneath him, and he heard a thud.

“Mute!” Smoke’s voice called out over comms. “He’s down! Under heavy fire, sir!”

From somewhere below, he could hear the sound of one of Smoke’s grenades going off. “In cover! Repeat, Mute is down, and we’re in cover! Requesting immediate back-up… please.”

Without another thought, Thatcher used a breaching charge to jump down a floor and rush in the direction of the fight.

… leave as though fire burns under your feet.

If you must speak…

Rat-tat-tat. Thatcher took down terrorist after terrorist. They weren’t expecting a flank, and he was cutting them down like a razor to hair.

“I’m here, Mute.”

The boy didn’t even turn to look at him. His eyes were glazed and his mouth slightly open, though no sounds came out.

“His gut, we need an evac.” Smoke tossed his last grenade and set it off to buy them some time.

There are four of them in this one building. Sledge’s shadow was coming up form behind them, the hammer giving him away. Evacuating Mute would be a two-person job. If he were any less confident, there would be no chance, but he actually believes. There’s a chance he can clear the floor and cover their evac on his own.

Take out the last two to the right, and one to the left. EMP the soft wall and breach through. Finish the floor. His was empty above anyways, and Sledge should have finished done down below.

“Go…”

“Mike, that’s also not a…” Sledge finally caught on to what he was suggesting.

“Nah, I’m proud of my team. Cliché and all, but I’ve had plenty of good years in my life, but he’s barely started his. Now get him help, and leave the rest to me.”

… Speak every word as though it were unique.

If you must die, sweetheart…

It’s a long fight. One that sapped all strength from his muscles, that softened his bones, that makes his hands tremble, but it’s a fight he takes. It’s down to Thatcher and one other man now. They see each other, know where the other is, and stare at each other with their hands tightening around their respective weapons.

Two gunshots: one pinging off a box, and the other tasting air, muscle, bone, muscle, air and then the wall behind.

One of them falls.

“Mike? MIKE!”

That voice… was it Smoke? Maybe Mute? No, he was unconscious. Probably Sledge, given that he had issues understanding what came next. Or maybe that was just the darkness calling his name.

What was it that Mark kept quoting at him? You die a hero or live long enough to become the villain? Or something like that?

Legends are always remembered. He just hopes he died fast enough.

… die knowing that your life was my life’s best part.

If you must die… remember your life.

There was a soft murmuring that slowly faded into silence. All things pass – even the complete and utter emptiness. Instead of going anywhere, he sits in that dark shell of what he can only assume is his own mind. It’s a welcome rest, and in his mind’s mind, he relives everything. The good, the bad, the really bad, and the atrocities.

There was no sun to tell him how many hours he’s been lying there. Yet in the distance, he swears he could hear his mother’s voice.

You are… You are… All you are… all.

And with that, he’s had it with this place. Wherever he is.

If you must fight…

When he comes to, he’s still on the floor, significantly weaker from before, but still alive. There’s a bullet in his vest, maybe a cracked rib or two, but he’s alive. His pistol was still there. That’s nice. He struggled to get to this hands and knees and crawl to cover. There were voices that definitely did not belong to his teammates. Had they gotten out? Or was he fighting a losing battle just to die as a martyr?

With a shaky hand, he measures everything, considers his strength. He might only have one shot. But that’s all he needs.

One shot, and the last body hits the floor. Then, he returns to that dark shell inside of him. There were worse fates.

… fight with yourself and your thoughts in the night.

If you must work…

Medal of honor, yadda yadda yadda. He couldn’t care less.

What mattered more was that he was hooked up to a machine that was listing out a very important number. That, and a friendly face was staring back at him.

“Do you want me to show you this new game I started? It’s super simple, but it’s very fun and simple to play. You’d love it.”

There was a light in his eyes that wasn’t there before. And from Sledge and Smoke, who stood a little farther behind the kid, they all had the same look. They admired him, and looked up to him. They’ll tell his stories to the legions of new recruits long after he himself has said goodbye to Hereford.

Isn’t this what you work for? For those who will pass on your morals and give you that piece of mind that you left the world slightly better than when you entered it.

… work to leave some part of you on this Earth.

If you must live, darling one…

“Hey, Mike?”

He jerked his head up and towards the sound of the voice. He must’ve been asleep, seeing as Sledge and Smoke had left, leaving Mute behind.

“Yeah?”

“Thank you.”

“For what?”

“You know… I know you know.”

With that, they shared a chuckle, and Mute gave one last nod before leaving him to fall asleep again.

… just live.

#r6s #rainbow six siege #r6s fanfiction #fanfiction #r6s thatcher #my writing #my story #based off of a song #fanfic #feels bad man #why do i always pick on thatcher

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cmncisspnandmore · 6 years ago

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Mistakes were made, Spencer Reid x Reader.

It hurt to look at him, every glance just pushed the icy dagger further into your broken heart.

It felt like just yesterday you sat down on the couch from a long day at work and he came in and broke your heart.

*flashback to 2 months ago*

Spencer walked into the room, his black cardigan pulled tightly around him, and he took a seat on the coffee table in front of you. You were about to share what you had been so anxiously waiting to tell him all day. When you noticed he wasn’t as happy to see you as you were to see him.

“What’s wrong Spence?” You sat forward on the couch, resting your elbows on your knees and grabbed his hand, running your thumbs over his long nimble fingers.

“We need to talk” he mumbled pulling his hands from your grasp; tucking them under his legs, his eyes cast downward.

Anxiety bubbled in your chest, and your knee started to bounce. If there was one thing you hated the most it was sentences like that. Swallowing thickly you nodded, “sure, what’s going on.”

“I’m in love with someone else..” Spencer whispers, and your heart shatters. The physical pain that swarmed in your chest made you take a gasping breath.

“Wh-what do you mean?” You stutter out, clenching your hands, your fingernails digging into the palms of your hands.

“I’ve been talking to this girl… her name is Maeve, we’ve been talking for 4 months. And I’ve fallen in love with her. I’m sorry” Spencer reaches over for your hand, as tears pool in your eyes.

“So this.. this is the end?” You choke out, ripping your hands away from him, and curling in on yourself. Your happy composure cracking like glass.

“I’m sorry Y/n” he stands up, and puts a hand on your hair brushing his fingers through it before he walks out the apartment door.

The lock clicks and then tears cascade down your cheeks like an unruly waterfall. Your chest heaves with sobs. You never got to tell him what you had been holding back all day at work. You laid back on the couch, putting one hand under your head, the other laying flat against your stomach. You laid there and cried until there was nothing left to cry and your head pounded.

You stand up from your couch and walk over to your bag, pulling the box wrapped in blue sparkly paper, and rip it open. With shaky hands you pull out the leather bound journal and flip to the front page where you had spent an hour decorating. You grab the corner of the page and tear it out, you glance at the thick paper.

‘You + Me = Three; Baby Reid EST 2013’

You crumple up the paper and shove it into the trash can, and make your way to the bedroom, where you hope for the sweet escape of sleep.

Standing in the bullpen with the team, you watch as Morgan claps Spencer on the back, telling him that it was good for him to have found someone.

Your eyes prick with tears and you take a deep shaky breath before turning and walking from the room. You make your way to the copy room, and put your hands on the copy machine and try to hold back the tears that are so desperately trying to escape.

“Y/n? You okay?” JJ puts a hand on your arm, shifting the papers she was coming to copy into her left arm.

You nod slowly, trying to return your breathing to normal.

“Yeah, yeah, I’m okay,” you sniffle and look over at the blonde. Her eyes are full of worry, she knew that you and Spencer didn’t leave on the greatest of terms, but she didn’t think it was this bad.

“You know you can talk to me. Spencer is my best friend, but that doesn’t mean I agree with what he did to you.” She sets the papers down and rubs your arm.

“Oh.. JJ. My life is a mess.” You sob, and JJ frowns, she’s never seen you this upset before and it worried her.

“Tell me what’s going on..” She guides you to a chair in the copy room, and pulls one up in front of you. It’s then that you feel the overwhelming need to finally tell someone what has been going on.

“I-I’m pregnant…” you whisper and for a second JJ isn’t sure she heard you right.

“What?” She sits up, and brushes her hair behind her ear.

“I’m pregnant and it’s Spencer’s..” You our your head in your hands, and let the tears fall.

“Does he know?”

“No.. I only found out the day he told me he.. he was in love with her…” you wiped at your eyes furiously.

“Oh y/n, you need to tell him… How far along are you?” She takes you hand and squeezes it gently.

“14 weeks.” You take a deep breath and try to calm down.

JJ pulls you into a bone crushing hug, “it’s better that he know now.”

“I know.. I just can’t.. I can't tell him. I can’t ruin his happiness, no matter what he did to mine.” You shake your head, and JJ runs her hands through her hair. Torn between wanting to punch her best friend and wanting to help you.

“He needs to know, it’s his baby too.” JJ states, her eyes searching your face.

“Who’s having a baby?” Spencer walks around the corner, his brows furrowed.

JJ gives you a sympathetic look, “I’ll go.”

Spencer watches as she walks from the room, confused as to why no one has answered his question.

“Y/n, who’s having a baby? Is it JJ?” He asks, glancing at you.

“No.. not JJ.” You mumble, and try to brush past him, desperate to leave the confined area.

“If it’s not her, then who?” He grabs your arm as you try to walk by and stop in your tracks.

“Just some friend from school.” You tug your arm free, and make your way to Hotchs office. Spencer watches you climb the stairs to his office, still confused as to where you are going.

You knock on Hotchs door, and he waves you in from his desk.

“Y/n, what can I do for you.” He smiles, gesturing to the chair across from his desk.

“I’m leaving.” You pick at a loose thread, on your skirt.

“Let’s talk about this.” Hotch leans back in his chair, and lets you explain why you’re leaving. You tell him about your pregnancy and how you need to get away for the safety of your baby and your own mental health. Hotch tried to get you to stay and you deny all his offers. Intent on getting out of the bau before anyone else catches on. Eventually Hotch relents, and lets you go, promising you that if you ever want your job back that you have it. With one last nod you leave, grab all your stuff from your desk and say goodbye to the team, not going into detail. Just saying that you need to take some time off. They all expected you to come back in a week or so, but you didn’t.

*4 months later*

You were walking home from the grocery store, having to stop more frequently now that you were almost 7 months pregnant. It took a lot to walk for few short blocks to your apartment from the grocery store. You glanced up at the setting sun, and someone ran right into you, causing you to drop the few bags you were carrying.

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry! I wasn’t paying attention.” The man who bumped into profusely apologized. You lean down and attempt to grab the bags that had spilled onto the sidewalk.

“It’s okay, don’t worry about.” You manage to grab one of the handles with the tips of your fingers.

“Y/n…. is that you.” The voice asks, and it hits you just how familiar it sounds.

“Hi… Spencer…” you stand up straight and he looks at you, his eyes wide. He takes in your protruding stomach and something in his mind clicks.

“It.. it was you.” He whispers, he sounds almost horrified.

“Yeah it was me.” You swallow hard, fingers picking at the plastic strap of the bag.

“He’s one lucky man..” he trails off, and you take in his sunken eyes and tired expression.

“Yeah.. I guess. I’m not so lucky, he doesn’t know and I’m sure he’ll want nothing to do with it. He’s happy with another girl.” You tuck your hair back, and tap your foot anxiously. You hadn’t spoken to him since the day you left the BAU.

“Oh I’m sorry,”

“It’s okay. Anyway how’s Maeve?” You ask trying to change the subject.

“She.. she um died. But yeah, when are you due?” He takes a deep breath and shoves his hand down into his pockets.

“Uh about 10 weeks.”

“Oh…” he trails off, and you start to lean back down to collect the runaway groceries. Spencer was smart and if you stayed there any longer he would surely put the timeline together.

“Wait… we broke up 6 months ago…” you can almost hear the gears in his head turning, and panic courses through your veins.

“Is.. is the baby… is it mine?” He asks tears in his eyes. You can do nothing but nod, as your own tears start to form. You hated crying, but since he left you. It was something you found yourself doing more and more.

He grabs you and pulls you into a hug and you both stand there on the sidewalk crying, holding onto each other for dear life.

“I want to be here for you..” He whispers and looks down at you, holding you a small distance away from him by your shoulders. You glance up through your tears, and let out a broken laugh. One that cuts Spencer deeply, he should’ve done something he should’ve tried to get in contact with you after you left.

“Okay…” you whisper, and he leans down and kisses you softly, and even though he gave you no indication that you were going to get back together. You felt in your heart that you were going to be okay again and you would both fix the broken pieces of your hearts together.

#spencer x y/n #criminal minds x y/n #criminal minds x you #criminal minds x reader #spencer x you #spencer x reader #criminal minds #pregnancy #angst #fluff #jj #spencer reid #spencer #reid

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halfusek · 6 years ago

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Hello, question concerning your Amazon Abomination comic Verse: What do you would have happened, if Henry stayed? I don't think it would've changes mich in the whole creating live thing and Joeys growing Obsession with it, but what would've happened to Henry?

Lemme clear something up - Abomination is nothing else but an interpretation of what in my opinion has happened in the studio. In the beginning, I wanted to make it a thing focusing on Joey and Bendy only but then I started getting more and more ideas which made me figure out a way to tell the whole story (in the way I see it at least).

At first I wanted to shortly answer “there would be no Abomination lol” but then I gave it some thinking and… get ready for an essay:

What would happen if Henry didn’t leave the studio?

I believe we have an answer for this concerning just Henry himself in the game.And it’s not a pleasant one.

“Local Artist Pushed Himself Too Hard, Found Dead At Desk”. I mean that’s basically what staying would mean for Henry - pushing harder.

I don’t think this newspaper is telling us what happened to Henry Stein, I got that impression the moment I saw the headline, but after a while, I realised it doesn’t really… make sense.

The whole point of Joey and Henry choosing two different roads is that Joey held onto working and creating while Henry chose family over work. (Even though Henry showed some signs of workaholism, I think Linda could be the one helping him choose what’s right and better for him - I mean why even mention and focus on her at any moment if she wasn’t important in any way?)Does that make sense? Make this whole “Henry chose the right path and didn’t push himself too hard” just to say that he pushed himself too hard in the end? Yeah, no, I’m not buying that. I mean it could be true but not really satisfying to me.

So I think it’s just a “what if”. What if he stayed.He would overwork himself.And since he would choose work over family then maybe he would lose Linda in the process, maybe not but either way their relationship wouldn’t be doing well.

Now let’s do a small comparison.

To me, Henry seems like a sorta passive person, especially with his “just keep drawing”. Don’t question anything, just keep doing what you do.On the other hand, we have Joey who is like “just do whatever it is you do and trust me as your leader”.

This is… a really bad mix.Even worse when you take into consideration that they are friends. And you are willing to push yourself harder for someone like that. For a friend.

Since we already are going kind of against Henry’s character by assuming he wouldn’t leave, we might as well assume he wouldn’t really change the way he’s working. He would keep pushing, just as Joey wants him to and as an old man thinks would magically fix everything but… no, I honestly doubt that.

I don’t think studio’s successes/failures depended on Henry either, he was one amazing animator, we can surely give him that (it took a few people to replace him), but Joey still managed to (temporarily) succeed without him.

I honestly doubt the debt the studio was later in could be easily fixed by one person. Maybe Joey would listen to Henry more than other people (like Grant, his goddamn accountant), but the thing is that at some point they were successful and well things often rely on luck, economy and stuff like that, so many ideas could have seemed fine until things weren’t really fine. I mean Great Depression made some people really rich and some really poor, it was really tricky to make financial decisions.Plus - Henry is passive. He just keeps drawing.Joey believes Henry would push him to do the right thing, maybe he would try but then again - Henry ends up overworking himself, so in the end, it’s almost as if he just left.Can’t really push if you’re dead.

So we actually end up with a similar set up to what we have in the original story.

The only exception is that we could have a 6th labelled coffin. With Henry’s name on it. So it could somehow go even more unpleasant from now. How? Oh, it’s pretty simple:

…kind of. As Henry would die from overworking himself and wouldn’t be actually… killed. But still, there is something which I think is worth noting.

It seems to me as if the inkwell is associated with Henry. I mean if any of the items was associated with him, it would be this one and no one from the workers doesn’t really fit (except for Joey, but “The Illusion of Living” fits him waaay better for obvious reasons). Also, let’s assume here that the items are connected to actual workers because they could just represent something else, but in this interpretation, I take them this way. I think I should elaborate a bit on how I see it works, which I actually did include in Abomination:

I did some math. And I don’t like it.

We have 14 characters: Joey, Henry, Wally. Thomas, Sammy, Norman, Jack, Johnny, Susie, Allison, Shawn, Grant, Lacie, Bertrum.(I’m going to aggressively count Johnny even if it’s not his name because the organ moans in pain and there has got to be someone in it and I like things making sense in the game, even if it’s just a reference to something else.)

12 (next to Norman’s and Grant’s there is an unlabeled coffin).

Another unlabeled one in that hallway after you exit Allison’s and Tom’s safehouse. So 13…

14.

Now, I’m not counting this one:

As it’s not a physical coffin, only a drawn one. It’s another symbol of death and death is connected to Henry a lot.

(The last one could be just referring to the ink as in the Ink Machine or to the inkwell, or maybe even to both, who knows.)

But the best/worst is:

The actual offering has a skull and crossed bones on it.Ink = death.Scythe being a “reward” for not dying a single time and killing everyone on your way. And activating all the flashbacks which help Henry realise he’s in a cartoonish loop. By entering the death tunnel on purpose. When Henry is most lucid.“You bring death”.And, heck, even him playing “The End” and setting everyone free (by playing “The End” and in some ways killing everyone in the studio) is something death-connected.

Whatever the symbolism is, let’s go with the inkwell being an offering connected to Henry’s soul.

Also, let’s go back to the number 14.

Workers with coffins: Norman, Grant, Bertrum, Lacie, Susie.

Workers with offerings: Henry (inkwell), Joey (book), Shawn (doll), Sammy (record), Thomas (gear), Wally (wrench).

Workers without labelled coffins nor offerings: Allison, Jack, Johnny.

Unlabeled coffins: 3.

What made me start thinking deeper about this is the fact that none of the workers has both a coffin and an offering.Also an interesting thing with how… corpses in the game act:

workers with coffins: Norman/The Projectionist, Susie/Alice - corpses don’t disappear (hard to tell what’s with Grant and Lacie as we can’t be sure of their fates and Bertrum is an octopus ride but his head doesn’t seem to go anywhere)

workers with offerings: Joey/The Ink Demon, Sammy/The Prophet, Wally/Boris - corpses sort of disintegrate/vanish? (except for Sammy in the searcher form but yeah he is a searcher which work differently, again we don’t know Shawn’s fate and Thomas/Tom didn’t die in-game)

the rest: Allison doesn’t die in-game, neither does Johnny (lmao imagine killing the organ) but Jack is crushed by a box and we can’t really tell what happens to his body but… his hat stays

other deaths: Searchers - they go back to the puddles, same with the Swollen Ones and the Lost Ones buuuuuuuuuuut!

the Butcher Gang - corpses don’t vanish but sort of? collapse? which is confusing (in a way Grant, Shawn and Lacie’s fates are so they aren’t necessarily crossed out of being at least some of the Butcher Gang members)

So the thing I think is that while not everyone was sacrificed, Joey still has some control over their souls. Or, if you please

owns.

And let me tell ya seeing as older, slightly more rationally thinking Joey still was playing with Henry’s soul making him go in an endless loop, leaves me with zero doubt that he would play with it 30 years earlier.I mean the inkwell has always been included in the packet. ;)And definitely Henry’s death would impact Joey, but I’m afraid…

…nothing good would come out of it.

#bendy and the ink machine #henry stein #joey drew #halfask #halfpost #abomination #long post #god it was longer than expected sorry vnkjsnkjds

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murasaki-murasame · 5 years ago

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Thoughts on Sarazanmai Episode 8: “I Want To Connect, But We’ll Never Meet Again”

Hey Ikuhara, do you take constructive criticism on your posts? :) I JUST WANT TO TALK :)))

I’d seen vague stuff on twitter recently about how devastating this episode was gonna be, and honestly I think that actually under-sold how messed up and tragic this episode was, on so many levels. I was actually worried that I’d end up being a little disappointed in it after how strongly people were talking about it, but hahaha nope. I am officially dead now :)

Thoughts under the cut.

OK first of all I may as well point out that I, and also lots of other people, totally saw that starting scene coming. It’s a lot more obvious if you’re familiar with Ikuhara’s writing style and the sorta tropes he likes to use, but it felt pretty inevitable that Toi and Kazuki would have had a prior connection we didn’t know about before now.

I was a bit confused about the timeline of it at first, but by the end of the episode it became pretty clear that it must have happened shortly after Toi shot that gangster dude. I guess it also must have happened shortly after the whole incident with Haruka, since Kazuki talked about ‘not being connected to anyone’, but I vaguely remember Kazuki looking older in the flashbacks to that whole sequence of events than he did in this episode’s flashback.

Even though this all makes sense and just ties everything together, I’m curious about why Enta has been saying that he was the one to give Kazuki the micanga. I mean, I think the initial story was that Enta gave it to him, but I can’t actually remember now. I wouldn’t be surprised if there’s still a little more for us to find out about how Enta and Kazuki first met and became friends.

Over the last few days I’d been preparing myself for the possibility of Chikai becoming a kappa zombie and getting erased from existence, and on the one hand I guess I’m happy that didn’t happen, but on the other hand I feel like what happened instead was even more tragic.

I’d been waiting for the inevitable part where the main trio would come into direct conflict with Reo and Mabu, and oh boy did that sure go in the worst possible way. Reo’s out there looking like a horror movie villain, and now Enta’s dead? Maybe? The fact that it looks like the severity of the gunshot wounds is censored so much actually makes it hard to get a feel for how fatal it’s meant to be. When they shot the first gangster dude earlier in the episode, it was so clean and bloodless that I honestly thought it was more like a magical tranquilizer dart so they could drag him to their police box to use the desire extraction machine on him, but I guess we’re meant to think that it was a straight up regular fatal gunshot.

To address the whole elephant in the room, I’d be very surprised if Enta’s actually permanently dead, when we have three whole episodes left. I know Ikuhara likes killing off his characters, but I feel like that tends to happen much closer to the end of the show. And since we already have a whole wish-granting system in place, anything’s possible. And going by what Mabu said at the end, and how one of the ep9 preview images seems to be of Kazuki in a hospital, I have a feeling that Enta might still be alive, but on the brink of death.

I’ve been on the Enta Defense Train [tm] from day one, and I hope that this episode helped people understand that he really is a good boy who doesn’t deserve the shit he’s gotten. The whole bit with him saying at the end that even after everything that happened, he couldn’t make himself say that he hated Kazuki was high-key heartbreaking.

And on top of all that, I honestly wasn’t expecting Toi to actually end up leaving with his brother. Well, mostly because I expected Chikai to die in this episode, but still. I imagine Kazuki will find a way to get back into contact with him soon enough, but the fact that Toi had also left them sure puts Kazuki in an even more tragic spot.

I hope I’m not the only one who’s getting the feeling that Kazuki’s quickly developing a crush on Toi, with how fast they’ve been bonding and how severely he’s reacting to Toi’s departure. It’d at least throw a whole new wrench in things if it’s true.

In spite of how Reo and Mabu’s actions in this episode are pretty straight-up indefensible, especially if we’re meant to think that Reo actually just outright shot both Enta and the gang member dude, I still can’t help but like them. Reo in particular is being driven out of loneliness and desperation, and also tbh it’s kinda hard to take his scary moments too seriously when they’re so over the top, and when we also know what he’s like in his day to day life, lol. At the very least I’d much rather people criticize them than Enta, considering that the worst thing Enta’s done so far is be a petty and jealous 14-year old with a crush, whereas Reo and Mabu are literally serial killers at this point.

And on the note of them, it sounds like the anime might never get around to adapting the short chapter from the first light novel volume that goes over how the two of them first met, which would be kinda sad since, now that I’ve read it, it’s really good and helps contextualize why Reo feels so strongly about Mabu and is doing so much for his sake. I’d say that the material from the manga and the twitter account is actually more ‘plot important’ and necessary to truly understanding them as characters, but still.

Vaguely related to them, we also got another scene with Sara and Keppi in this episode, which seems to spell out more explicitly that they’re both on the side of the kappas and are working against the otters, to the point of Sara whipping out some anti-otter technology. I still have no goddamn idea what to make of her as a character at this point, especially since this episode really makes it seem like she doesn’t remember Reo and Mabu, even though we’ve already been told that the ReoMabu manga is, one way or another, canon to the anime.

I initially wasn’t sure if Keppi getting frozen was meant to have consequences or just be a silly thing, but I saw someone point out that if he stays that way for a while, then Kazuki won’t be able to transform into a kappa, which could be a problem.

I think I said in the last episode post that it looks like things are heading straight into the climax, and that seems to be the case now. A lot is probably going to hinge on who gets to use the plates to make a wish, and what they use it for. I’m curious to see if Reo and Mabu only have the four plates that Enta had stolen, or if they also got the fifth one that the trio would have gotten after the ball zombie fight. It’d probably make more sense if Rreo and Mabu only have four of them, so they can’t immediately make a wish with it.

The more the show goes on, the more things pop up that seem like really good and necessary places to use the wish on, so it’s getting harder to tell how I think that’ll all end up. At this point the situations going on with Toi and Enta seem a lot more severe and in need of outside help than Reo and Mabu’s situation.

Even with just three episodes left, I’m not entirely sure what to expect. Mostly I just hope it manages to stick the landing. I’m kinda worried that, at the very least, Reo and Mabu’s characters might end up being too reliant on material from outside of the anime to really flesh them out, but at this point I think the main trio and their development will be handled in a satisfying way.

I said before that I thought we’d be in for another whole round of secret reveals, but with how this episode went, and the possibility of Kazuki not being able to even turn into a kappa in the short term with Keppi being out of commission, I think the pattern is completely broken at this point and we might not get any more secret leaking sequences. At least not via the whole sarazanmai transformation thing.

If there’s any one specific thing I really want them to address before the anime ends, it’s the whole connection between Reo, Mabu, and Sara, since that hasn’t come up at all yet in the anime, and it seems really important. But we’ll see.

One way or another I think we’re in for a lot more tragedy before this ends, lol.

#murasaki rambles #sarazanmai #I want to get off Ikuhara's Wild Ride :(

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takerfoxx · 6 years ago

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Strap in folks, because I couldn’t narrow it down to a single fav from this series, so buck up guys, because today we have a four-way tie! The fav(s) of the day are...

MEGABYTE!

Reboot was a very special show. Not only was it the first all CGI show ever and singlehandedly innovated much of the technology, but it also featured great writing, great direction, and a lot of creativity. And it had some amazing characters, not the least of which was its main villain.

In fact, Megabyte might just very well be one of the coolest villains ever. He hasan awesome design that conveyed power, malice, speed, and intelligence, and he checked off just about every box off an awesome bad guy. Strong enough to throw around armored vehicles like toys? Check. Genuinely brilliant? Check. A thin veneer of class and manners? Check. Does everything with style? Check. Ends up being completely immune to the threat decay most animated villains suffer from and actually becomes more threatening, more ruthless, and more terrifying as the show goes on? Big check. Hell, he spends most of season three having actually defeated the good guys and ruling over all of Mainframe, and is only stopped from spreading his infection to the super computer at the very last second.

But most of all, credit has to be given to the late, great Tony Jay for giving him just the most awesome voice ever. Ever line is just so silky smooth, so dripping with malice and evil. Whether he be trying to manipulate the heroes, giving dastardly commands to his underlings, or just dropping the pretenses and making it clear that he is here to fuck shit up, every word just sends a chill down your spine.

But the best of it is, he actually wins! No, I’m serious, the final episode ends on a cliff-hanger, with a now more vicious than ever Megabyte having taken over Mainframe again and making it clear that he intends to hunt down the heroes one by one to eliminate them. This was done in hopes that it would drum up enough fan interest to get funding for a full continuation. Sadly, this never materialized and Reboot was cancelled for good, but I guess that does mean that Megabyte ends up the winner. And no, the Guardian Code doesn’t fucking count.

Plus he dueled Bob in an awesome guitar duel in what is probably the greatest moment in animation history ever, so that’s amazing.

AND HEXADECIMAL!

However, his sister Hexadecimal is a different sort of beast entirely, but no less awesome. If Megabyte is the perfect example of lawful evil, than she is chaotic evil incarnate. The woman of a million masks is far more powerful than her already OP brother, and a million times crazier. She cares little for power and control. After all, she has it already, and would rather spend her time wreaking havoc just for the fun of it.

Hex isn’t all that active for a first season and a half, probably because the creators knew that a villain that powerful would be too much of a problem to keep trying to come up with a solutions for. But her rare solo episodes are among the series’ best, with the heroes barely managing to snatch victory by the barest of centimeters, and having to rely on their wits to do so. And she is just a joy to watch on-screen, with Shirley Millner obviously having a blast voicing her. She can go from kind and grandmotherly to downright seductive to shrieking with laughter at the carnage she’s about to unleash to driven by blind fury at the drop of a hat, and every conversation with her has the participants constantly shitting themselves, hoping not to upset her. And she knows it.

Hex also gets a rather fascinating character arc. As twisted as she is, her infatuation with Bob does give her some redeeming qualities, and he is smart enough to take advantage of that to get her to do the right thing on more than one occasion. He also is the only person to show her genuine kindness, and one act of mercy eventually does convince her to throw in with the good guys. Even then she’s great fun to watch, as it’s clear she’s only in it out of affection for Bob, and everyone just has to learn to work with that, because what else can they do? But in time she becomes an actual hero herself, giving her life for save the entire Net from the greatest threat the show has ever seen. And it’s awesome.

I’ll freely admit, when I wrote Yuuka Kazami in Imperfect Metamorphosis, I pretty much ripped off Hexadecimal’s personality for her, to...interesting results. But as much fun as Yuuka was to write, she doesn’t hold a candle to the original Queen of Chaos, long may she reign.

AND MATRIX!

As far as kid characters go, little Enzo Matrix was...all right. He started off annoying as such characters do, but he did grow and mature and actually make himself useful, so his over-enthusiasm eventually became kind of endearing. And his struggles to prove himself once the heroes lose Bob was pretty fascinating.

But then the show flips the script. He loses a game and is forced to switch into Game Sprite mode to avoid being nullified, causing him and Andraia to leave wit the game. And when we do catch up with them, it is much later, and little Enzo is all grown up.

And he is awesome.

Matrix is every 90′s anti-hero all rolled into one. He’s big, he’s muscular, he’s gruff, he’s short tempered, he likes shooting things, he has all the angst, and he even has a cool mechanical eye to replace the one he lost in the games. Normally this sort of thing would be annoying, but the show does take a great deal of time to show how his insecurities and PTSD have shaped him into what he became, with him often having to face his own flaws in his quest to get home. Added to the fact that we already know the plucky kid he used to be instead of just getting to see him in flashbacks, and you got yourself some great television.

But while show doesn’t cut Matrix any slack when he screws up (which is awesome), it also doesn’t condemn him for changing like he did, acknowledging that what he went through was terrible and he did what he had to do to survive. Plus, it also doesn’t shy away from giving him a lot of genuine badass moments. And that final fight where he goes one-on-one with Megabyte? Pure awesome.

AND ANDRAIA!

No raging angst machine is complete without someone level-headed to keep them in check, and AndrAIa is exactly that. A Game Sprite that befriended Enzo during a game and managed to trick the game itself into letting her stay with him. I admit, when I was a kid, I had wee bit of a crush on her, and was really interested in what this new character could bring to the story.

Like Enzo, she also has to do a lot of growing up to survive the games, maturing from an overly-literal fish-out-of-water into a cool and confident (and hot, I’ll freely admit it) warrior, who was the Ying to Matrix’s Yang. Their relationship was pretty great, from how they support one another to their bickering but always reconciling. AndrAIa is never one to take Matrix’s shit and will call him on it, but also be there to build him back up when he’s down.

Unfortunately, given how late in the series she appeared, AndrAIa doesn’t have much of a character arc of her own, which is a real shame. She’s a constant supporting character, and it did annoy me that she never really got much to do that wasn’t directly related to what another character was doing. Personally I would liked to see her have more agency and more of her own struggles to deal with instead of always being the one to help others with their own. Still, for what it’s worth, she is incredibly cool. I just wish she got to have more to do.

I come from the net. Through systems, peoples and cities to this place: Mainframe.

#reboot #megabyte #hexadecimal #enzo matrix #andraia #fav of the day

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animebw · 6 years ago

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Binge-Watching: Elfen Lied, Episodes 8-10

In which some semblance of sanity returns, I bitch about the show abandoning its best qualities, and Nana reminds me that this show can be good at times.

Wish I Could Turn Back Time

Elfen Lied is a bad show. I think it’s safe to say that at this point. It’s crushed under mountains of its own bullshit, a turd prancing about in a silken dress and trying to pass itself off as art. I mentioned it feels like a story tailored to the sensibilities of angry, angsty teen boys, and with how flawed the writing can be, it also feels like a story that would be written by an angry, angsty teen boy. It demands to be taken seriously, with its painterly color palette and aria-inspired soundtrack, but the actual meat of the story is too trite and messy to warrant that level of pretension. And yet, there are still moments where it just damn works. For all the sturm and drang and buckets of blood flying everywhere, Elfen Lied is a show that manages to speak its loudest when it gets out of its own way, shuts up, and just lets itself be.

The 1.5 episode flashback detailing Lucy’s upbringing, and how she first met Kohta, is easily the strongest the show has been since its opening episodes, because it remembers the lesson of those first few episodes: use a little to say a lot. That one shot of the two of them sitting in a cave in the rain, while the music box plays an eerie rendition of the OP song, is 10 times more evocative than anything the show’s done since episode 3. It speaks through images, like Lucy waking up after a nightmare to see the thousands of ghastly handprints her vectors left all over her room, saying all it needs to about her mental state through just a single picture, or Lucy and Kohta humming the music box tune back to back, lost in their own thoughts. It lets the emotions flow unclouded until it’s earned the catharsis of a bloodbath that marks Lucy’s descent into madness- and likely, the moment where Kohta’s sister died. It’s even got moments of real heart, like a blushing Lucy furiously trying to control her amazement at the zoo animals, surprised to find she can still be happy. It’s still got the problem of neither of these characters feeling like the people they eventually grew up into, but as a self-contained story, it tracks really well.

But I still have issues.

Edgelord Bullshit

If there’s one part of Elfen Lied’s failure to capitalize on the promise of its first few episodes that irks me more than anything, it’s the failure to recapture what made its insane violence work so well. The bloodletting in the first two episodes was intense as hell, but it was also artful, in a way, like a well-choreographed machine of chaos. Watching these insanely powerful psychics rip everything in their path to shreds was an exercise in awe, witnessing the destructive might of a chaotic creator god figuring out the coolest way to get the guts flying. And yet, we haven’t had a single other sequence since then that’s matched that mad genius. Nana and Lucy’s first fight approached it, but we’ve already seen limbs being torn off. It’s old hat at this point.

Instead, all the violence has become annoying and frustrating, because it’s stopped trying to be engaging and started trying to matter. Elfen Lied no longer wants to awe us with its bloody spectacle; instead, it wants to present you with a gritty reality so you can gasp and say, “How profound! What a meaningful, grounded exploration of very real violence!” Expect, as we’ve established, Elfen Lied does realistic about as well as Donald Trump does politics. So every single attempt to create moments of impactful violence tips so far into edgy territory that it almost becomes comical. When the orphanage kids slaughter Lucy’s dog, I was staring at the screen utterly bemused, because who the fuck kills a dog? Seriously, what fucking kids are that cruel? Are they all just sociopaths? If Lucy’s story is supposed to be that she was crushed by the raw, unfiltered cruelty humanity is capable of, it fails because the level of sadism present is too cartoonish to be believable. And how about that moment where she freaks out and violently strangles Kohta, only for him to brush it off like it’s no big deal? It was so stupidly banal that I almost laughed.

Yes, these moments take place in an arc that’s actually able to support its own weight, even with these additions. And if anything, that only frustrates me more. Because the storytelling chops on display here prove that Elfen Lied isn’t a hopeless case. It can tell a good story when it puts its mind to it. It can wrangle actual emotions out of me. So why does it insist on bogging itself down in this garbage?

Nana is the Key

Amidst all this frustration, I find myself again turning to Nana, the single character who I genuinely care about in this mess. And she continues to impress me, learning from his mistakes and coming to accept Nyu, despite the pain of feeling like she was betrayed. In fact, the other piece of backstory we learn these episodes makes her presence in the show even more fascinating: Turns out she doesn’t call Kurama “Papa” just because he was the only person who was nice to her; he actually is her father! He was supposed to kill her as a child to keep the Diclonius virus from spreading, but his wife’s dying wish convinced him to keep her alive. No wonder he’s been fighting so hard for her safety all this time.

If the Diclonius are supposed to be mankind’s ultimate doom, a stepping stone on the path to their next evolution, then Nana is the rebuttal to that assessment. She’s prove these evolved humans can coexist alongside the current generation, proof that they don’t need to live in fear of each other. She’s the true beating heart at this story’s center. Whether the finale with make good on the promise she represents or end on a moment of tragic lost hope remains to be seen. All I know is that she and Lucy are going to have to face down #35, the most dangerous Diclonius in existence. However it turns out, it should be one hell of a finish.

Odds and Ends

-I’m a bit pissed we haven’t had any further development of Kohta and Yuka’s relationship. They literally kissed last time, why are they suddenly stuck in place now? You had such a good opportunity there, show!

-”I told you, I’m quite fond of unusual animals.” Lucy, your self-hating visions are a piece of work.

-”She’s just hungry and irritable!” Smooth cover, Mayu.

-”Consequently, you’re sentenced to naked crucifixion!” Um, Nana? What the fuck is up with your subconscious?

And with that, I’m calling it a night. See you next time for the epic conclusion to Elfen Lied!

#anime #the anime binge-watcher #tabw #elfen lied

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weedle-testaburger · 6 years ago

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Steven Universe for Depth Fandom Questions!

Top 5 favourite characters: Stevonnie, Lapis, Steven, Connie and Amethyst

Other characters you like: Peridot, Pearl, Flourite, Sadie, the Cool Kids, Bismuth, Rhodonite and Greg

Least favourite characters: Ronaldo, Jasper, Holly Blue Agate and Aquamarine

Otps: Connverse, Lapidot, Rupphire and the Cool Kids as a poly ship (including Sadie)

Notps: Jaspis and any other Steven ship besides Connverse

Favourite friendships: Steven and Connie’s, Steven and Lapis’s, Amethyst and Pearl’s and Lars’ friendship with the Off-Colors

Favourite family: Steven, the Gems and Greg

Favourite episodes: I guess I’ll pick one from each season for brevity? :P Alone Together, Sworn To The Sword, Alone At Sea, Mindful Education and Reunited.

Favourite season/book/movie: Hmm... I think season 3, although it’s close between seasons 3, 4 and 5

Favourite quotes: Peridot describing her meep morp: ‘It represents the struggles of inner communication. The tape is the ribbon that binds our experience on Earth together. It has no functional purpose! It just makes me feel bad!” (the way she says that last bit so delightedly kills me), and Steven throwing marshmallows at Peridot and declaring “This is life for you now! Endless suffering!”

Best musical moment: Here Comes A Thought, I do love Mr Greg but that song hits me even harder than all the songs from that episode tbh

Moment that made you fangirl/boy the hardest: Steven and Connie making up in Kevin Party (I know that episode had its flaws but I was so happy to see them make up honestly)

When it really disappointed you: Lapis fleeing the moment Steven mentioned the Diamonds in Can’t Go Back, I felt like it sucked that they almost seemed to be abandoning her for the foreseeable future and I was so glad to see her back for Reunited

Saddest moment: Lapis taking the barn and leaving Peridot in Raising The Barn

Most well done character death: Jasper’s corruption (I think it’s the only ‘death’ that counts anyway lol)

Favourite guest star: I don’t think Uzo Aduba counts since Bismuth is back in the regular cast so I guess I’ll go with Nicki Minaj Favourite cast member: I kinda have to say Grace Rolek cause I met her and got an autograph at Birmingham Comic-Con, she was lovely :3

Character you wish was still alive: Can I say Lapis and Peridot since they’re poofed now? If not I guess Centipeetle

One thing you hope really happens: I would love so much to see another full-on Crystal Temps episode, maybe with a special intro or something

Most shocking twist: The Pink Diamond one, I’m still barely over it tbh

When did you start watching/reading?: Early Summer 2016

Best animal/creature: I would die for Cat Steven

Favourite location: the Jungle Moon I think

Trope you wish they would stop using: I feel like it’d be nice if the show didn’t make everyone redeemable, I don’t mind the lead on from Reunited because I do think the Diamonds turning against Homeworld could be really interesting, but I feel like much as kids need to learn respect and tolerance they also need to learn some people won’t respect you no matter how nice you are to them

One thing this show/book/film does better than others: Showing the importance of consent, communication and mutual trust in friendships and relationships

Funniest moments: The meep morp quote I mentioned before

Couple you would like to see: If Lapidot becomes canon I would go nuts

Actor/Actress you want to join the cast: Hmm... maybe some well-known voice actresses like Tara Strong or Kristen Schaal voicing fusions would be cool

Favourite outfit: Lapis’s or all of Connie’s and Stevonnie’s (I can’t choose between them aidsfdsh)

Favourite item: Ik it’s cliche but Cookie Cats, if they were a real food I’d eat them all the time honestly

Do you own anything related to this show/book/film?: A few of the books, a postcard book, all the Pops except the Pink Diamond and Stevonnie ones (I WANT THE LATTER SO MUCH), all the blind box figures except one of the Garnets, Onion and Peridot, the Steven, Connie, Amethyst and Peridot blind bag figures and the Australian DVD box sets (because I love having DVDs of the shows I like and my PC works with all regions)

What house/team/group/friendship group/family/race etc would you be in?: I feel like I’d want to hang out with Sadie tbh, she’s kinda dorky and cute and the sort of person I like being friends with irl. Gem stuff is cool but I’m too much of a wuss for it :P

Most boring plotline: Gem Drill wasn’t great imo, the buildup was fun more for seeing Peridot’s big redemption than the actual Cluster and the climax was kinda sneezed at us

Most laughably bad moment: Idk if it’s very laughable but most of the Ronaldo stuff (I actually remember liking Rising Tides, Crashing Skies though)

Best flashback/flashfoward if any: Hmm... either We Need To Talk or The Answer, I think

Most layered character: Torn between Amethyst, Pearl, Steven and Lapis, but I’m inclined to say Lapis cause she’s had the biggest arc proportional to her screentime

Most one dimensional character: Ronaldo, I don’t think there’s any argument here

Scariest moment: Lapis and Jasper fusing at the end of Jail Break was haunting as hell

Grossest moment: The Human Zoo’s machine stripping Steven in Gem Heist :/Best looking male: I think Lars tbh, although young Greg is cute as hell too

Best looking female: Amethyst is the one I find most attractive, but Lapis is very pretty

Who you’re crushing on (if any): Amethyst tbh

Favourite cast moment: Those vines Zach, Deedee, Jennifer and Michaela did with Thomas Sanders were amazing XD

Favourite transportation: Lion

Most beautiful scene (scenery/shot wise): the Jungle Moon was gorgeous, although the bit where the Gems all line up to take on Blue Diamond in Reunited was amazing too

Unanswered question/continuity issue/plot error that bugs you: Much as I love Mindful Education to bits, I do find Connie’s ‘fighting instincts kicking in at school’ kinda weird, and think it would’ve been better if she’d just had a fight with her parents since that’s kinda more relatable.

Best promo: Probably the Lars of the Stars preview from SDCC last year, that got me super hyped for that episode half a year before it aired!

At what point did you fall in love with this show/book: I think the moment I went from liking this show to realizing I absolutely love this show was probably Alone Together. That episode is just so nuanced, has so many great moments and lines, and has some of the smartest symbolism SU has ever done, that it really endeared me to it.

Thanks for asking Bia! Sorry I took a while with all the questions :3

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cassandra-mcclure · 6 years ago

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Talk about a flashback to my childhood when I worked for my moms party + event rental companies.. Who would have guessed that I would follow in her footsteps so closely. I have not been homesick but yesterday all I kept thinking about was how we worked onsite at so many events together growing up.. tearing down tents, setting up bounce houses, delivering snow cone machines, long drives in the box van all over the Pacific Northwest... and SO long nights in the shop in the industrial park in Kent, Washington... it was our whole life. Yesterday I found myself picking up glasswear from @unicapartyrentals , florals from @dubonfloraldesign , styling pieces from @stephaniestimmler and worked with @weddingswithgina .. After we arrived onsite Gina & I set up tables, linens, glassware and signage for 165 women for the @onehope crush event at @crissyfieldsbeach ! Thanks to @mintstudiosd for trusting in my @bayareastyledshoots team to make it all happen! 🍾 #onehopewine #mintstudios #bayareastyledshoots #eventsbycassandramcclure #bayareaevents #sfevents #onehopecrush #sfevents #sfstylist

#onehopewine #onehopecrush #bayareastyledshoots #mintstudios #bayareaevents #sfevents #eventsbycassandramcclure #sfstylist

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vadhnatta · 7 years ago

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Justice League Rant

Have you ever been to a movie where you hoped it would be decent, despite assorted warning signs, but then you end up having a CinemaSins track running through your head the entire time as you slowly crush the empty box of concession stand candy and wonder if it actually is possible to murder a man with the force of sheer hatred, disgust, and a growing tension headache? Because that was this movie. I could have been sleeping. I could have been working on my projects due next week. I haven’t really seen many DC movies, or been invested in their world at all, but I saw Wonder Woman and loved it and Diana was featured prominently in the trailer, which looked pretty good, so I figured, hey, maybe they actually figured out how to make a good character and can keep this momentum going for a bit. It won’t be as good as Wonder Woman, but I could at least probably see Diana be a badass for a bit, and Aquaman looks like a decently amusing character. I saw a few episodes of the Flash TV series and that wasn’t awful. Maybe this will be okay.

No.

No it’s not.

I’m mostly waiting for the Excedrin to kick in so I can take a nap before diving back into a project with a program that has most of its documentation in Polish (which I do not speak), so this isn’t going to be a detailed or coherent meta analysis of all the points wrong with this film, or how I’m not sure there wasn’t a woman under the age of 60/over the age of 10 that wasn’t immediately sexualized, or how Joss Whedon should never be allowed within 30 feet of a woman apparently. But here’s a list of thoughts that went through my head while I watched this, for amusement and catharsis, because Wonder Woman was a fluke, Patty Jenkins and Gal Gadot both deserved better, and DC Comics is incapable of having nice things.

((Spoilers, obviously))

--I heard beforehand that there were four ass-shots of Diana, all added in by Joss Whedon, and I was hoping that was an exaggeration or not horribly noticeable, but yeah. I actually think there were more than four, but I didn’t count.

--On the ass-shot note, at first I didn’t think Diana was wearing underwear under her skirt because we saw her ass cheek. Yeah. But she was. It’s dark blue. I know that because we saw up her skirt again, multiple times.

--People tried to say the bikini armor was only in a flashback. No it wasn’t. They lied to us. We get to see Amazon warriors crushed to death under large stone gate things, straining to hold it up for their queen to run underneath it like that one bit from Prince Caspian, except with women in metal bikinis.

--You know how the Amazons all had really cool armor that wasn’t super sexualizing based on actual ancient armor forms and construction techniques? Nope. Now they have similar highly-stylized banded chestplates like Diana’s, form-fitted around their boobs, and about half of those come in bikini form! Because variety!

--The Amazons can’t leave their island??? Um. But the entire reason they didn’t leave in Wonder Woman was because Hippolyta didn’t want to sacrifice her warriors for a war that wasn’t theirs, not because they physically couldn’t leave the island? So there’s an attack on their home, many warriors slain, and the only thing they can do at all is light a fucking signal fire??? They are way better than this.

--Did they actually kill Hippolyta’s wife/partner? Because that’s how that scene read to me. Fuck you movie.

--At least they didn’t actually destroy all of Themyscira. I’ll take my small victories there because I was convinced they were going to take my favorite part of Wonder Woman and burn it the first chance they got.

--How did they light this fire? Where was this temple? It’s obviously visible to the rest of the world, so it’s not on Themyscira. Was that a magic bow that could fire across dimensions? How could you aim it? I’m so confused by this scene. It’s one temple on fire, how did you know it would make the news and Diana would also happen to be watching the news when they ran that story, that’s hardly the biggest news story out there.

--So Diana had lightning powers. Or did the final battle of Wonder Woman not actually happen now. You know, the bit where she shot a giant lightning bolt thing out of her bracers. Vaporized a god. That. So, why the fuck is the only thing her bracer boosh move is good for now is creating a small shockwave to knock people back. It does nothing.

--Also, “we need an electric charge to shock the cube so we can activate the resurrection bullshit.” “Okay, so we need the Flash to run really fast down a hallway to build up electricity and poke the cube at exactly the right moment. That’s the best and simplest way to do this. I mean, it’s not like we have a literal daughter of the god of lightning bolts that has enough lightning powers to vaporize a god standing right next to us, where she could make lightning.”

--I thought the whole point of this movie was an Avengers-style team up where they actually worked together to take down the evil guy. But they just teamed up to bring back Superman, distract the bad guy long enough for Superman to show up, then Superman handles it. So. You just proved the point that you’re all worthless without Superman.

--Rich isn’t a superpower, how are you not dead yet Batman.

--Batman is bitter/jealous/??? because Clark is more human than him for... getting a job and living a middle-class lifestyle when he didn’t have to? Bruce. You could do that. You too can put on glasses and go get a day job. You could give away all your money and go live on a farm and be a reporter or whatever. Like. That’s an option for you. Being rich isn’t a handicap.

--Aquaman I don’t care what you are or that you’re Legolas-surfing on a bug-orc, if you fall from hundreds of feet in the air, you die. At the very least your legs should be shattered.

--Also, I have to agree with Batman on that one, you literally just brought a trident. You. You’re powers are water-related. Yeah, you have combat abilities apparently on par with Amazons, but. You couldn’t have steered this fight towards a lake? Brought some water with you? I feel like you could have been more effective in this fight somehow.

--I actually liked Aquaman for a good bit during this film. He came across kind of like Thor did to me early on, but with more whiskey and less ties to his home. I can totally get behind the vigilante merman defender of this town that rescues fishermen and hangs out at bars and randomly wanders into the ocean. He felt nicely reminiscent of old mythology stories for a bit there.

--But then the plane scene. Yeah, good points about how Batman doesn’t have a superpower, Flash is just tripping over his feet and slamming into walls all the time, and Cyborg may or may not be controlled by the cube things, or at least not have full control of his powers, agreed. But your point on Diana was “you’re gorgeous”, then increased rambling, leading into more rambling motivated by the lasso. You were actually doing okay, you didn’t need the sexist bullshit. It seemed like Atlanteans and Amazons fought, but still respected each other as powerful warrior cultures (at the very least, they seemed really similar), and she’s the one that’s actually shown the most effectiveness and power in fighting so far. So what the fuck.

--Did we really need the disparity between the male and female Atlantean armor. Did we really need the boobplate.

--Can Atlanteans not talk underwater? They live underwater. Do they need to create air bubbles every time they want to say anything?

--What are Cyborg’s powers exactly? Anything electronic/machine related? Regenerating machine(??) body parts? Can he change his limbs into anything? Does he need fuel? What is his deal, idk.

--”The plane won’t fly that fast (to get across the world in under a few hours).” Cyborg: “It will for me.” ...I don’t. That’s. That’s not how planes work. Or can you expand your entire body/infinitely-shapeshifting limbs to cover the entire plane so it won’t fall apart from higher speeds than it was meant to fly at. Can you just restructure the engines, or reshape the plane to make it more aerodynamic. Are you just going to merge with the plane and turn it into an SR-71 Blackbird. Is that the plan here. BECAUSE THAT’S NOT HOW PLANES WORK. YOU CAN’T JUST TELL IT TO GO FASTER BECAUSE YOU HACKED IT WITH MAGIC SHIT.

--Why is there an egg thing around the town for a few minutes. I don’t. Is that a bug thing? That’s not what the cube did in the flashback.

--What’s with the purple tendril rock things? It looks sort of like the Crystal Dragon landscaping stuff from GW2. Idk. How that fits.

--So. I’m sure Superman can pick up a building and he’s strong enough for that. But. I don’t think that’s how buildings work? Like if you put the entire weight of the building supported by two hands in the middle, especially an apartment structure that large/wide, it’s probably going to collapse at the ends. Unless Superman also has magic forcefield building-holding powers, idk, maybe he does, what do I know.

--I’m really not sure what was going on with this bad guy, but he looked like a frost giant from Thor, mixed with the plot-line of Pitch Black from Rise of the Guardians. Literally both movies ended the same way. Also not sure how nothing seemed to hurt him, how does something get more powerful than all the armies, when did this become Lord of the Rings? Was he supposed to be Sauron?

--How did they all just. Forget the cube. When Superman woke up. You just. Left the apocalypse-causing mcguffin in the empty plane. Unguarded. What. Did the DM just rush the party out of the room without letting any of the players say anything about taking the thing with them because he wanted to progress the story in a certain way? Because I’ve had that happen, that’s plausible, but.

--Why was calling Lois to handle newly-resurrected Superman not the first plan? I mean, protect her, obviously, in case he has no memories at all, but. That seems like the obvious first plan. Wake him up, have Flash waiting to get her out of there quickly if something goes wrong and Diana standing with her (not with armor and sword and everything out looking ready for battle), and talk to him? Don’t immediately trigger a threat response because he’s disoriented and confused and why are battle-ready people staring at him?

--Why did Diana always need her sword to fight? She even jumped down the reactor thing to get her sword back. What’s so special about this sword? It’s not the Godkiller sword, that was destroyed in the last movie by Ares. So. It’s a regular sword, presumably. She has lots of them. Bring an extra.

--Also Diana can use other weapons. She trained with Amazons, she can wield all the weapons.

--I almost left to go to the bathroom during the final climactic fight. Because I had no investment in this film, and the only thing that kept me there was the last shred of a chance that Diana could at least do something cool during this fight. She didn’t. She swung her sword at the bad guy, which didn’t do anything, made a shockwave a couple times. She broke his axe after Superman froze it. Wow.

--Is that really it? Was his power all in his axe? This really is Sauron.

--So did the cubes just vaporize when they separated? Didn’t happen last time. But we don’t see them anymore. So. Are they not a threat? Also “big power surge” on separation really seemed like it should be more than that. It knocked Superman and Cyborg back by a foot or so and onto their backs (also how did they both handle that the same way, I don’t care if you have magically regenerating metal, I’m pretty sure you’re not as explosion-resistant as Superman). And the rest of the team didn’t seem to feel it at all, and they were in the same complex. I thought power surge on separating this planet-destroying nuclear bomb of a power core would at least take out that town.

--Why. Did it make flowers? I’m. Really confused by the terraforming at the end. I think they tried to frame it earlier as a life-regenerating thing that just worked so fast it destroyed everything, but. That’s not really an explanation. Also don’t stick your face in that small child, the bright colors probably mean it will kill you. Also alien plants. Probably going to completely fuck up the ecosystem for a good while. But sure, it’s pretty so it’s fine.

--Oh, and the boob-faceplant did happen. She was facing away from the camera, so I easily believe the body-double story because they were so fucking desperate to have this happen.

--Was the Flash always an idiot? I feel like his entire character was just played for laughs as the dumb one because he was younger/less experienced, which is disappointing. Seriously, who meets Batman and the first thing you talk about is that you don’t understand people because they’re on a different frequency/slow, and what is brunch??

I’m sure there’s a lot more, but those are the things that immediately came to mind, so. Save yourself the headache. Don’t see this movie. Just go watch Wonder Woman again. Or Thor: Ragnarok, that one was good.

EDIT: WAIT I HAVE MORE.

--Fuck you Bruce you little shit, you have no right to call out Diana for not superheroing all the time. First of all, we’ve already seen her on multiple occasions out helping people, like the opening of the film where she saves a bunch of people from that terrorist group, and whatever happened in BvS. Second, she didn’t leave her home and everyone she loved to help clean up your shit or put up with you, she specifically left to stop WW1 and kill Ares. Guess what. She did it. She did her explicit mission, and then stayed to help when she wanted to because she’s a good person. Yeah, I think she gets to “shut down” for however long she fucking wants to after the person she cared most about outside of Themiscyra died and she had to deal with the entire “no, men actually suck and will go to war and commit atrocities because it’s their nature” thing she had to come to terms with, WHILE STILL STAYING AND FIGHTING FOR THEM ANYWAY. She has no obligations to you, you do not own her attention or her help, yes Barry, we would all cover for her if she murdered your ass for antagonizing her and insinuating that she has done anything wrong in her life.

--Also, what have you done huh? You dress up like a bat in your costume and run around the city because you like an adrenaline rush and want to feel cool taking down criminals. Sure, you donate to charity, whoopdee-fucking-do. You could probably buy a country. You have so much money. What were the stats on how much money it would take to end world hunger? 5% of what the US spends on their military budget or something? Less? You probably have more money than that. You want to do something more than cosplay with it??

#justice league #justice league spoilers #wonder woman #rant #long post #everything wrong with #i don't even know #it was just bad

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evelyn-fenton-blog · 7 years ago

Text

Family Fuck ups.

I sit at the desk. I had hoped the palace would make chairs more comfortable than the ones at my own home, but alas any chair sat in for more than four hours is a bad chair. I suppose I should be socializing.

Maya is now my friend, Eloise is my friend, I’m supposed to be seducing Prince Nathaniel. But I want to write. There’s just no inspiration. It’s not like the first time I wrote. Not like the first time I lost.

**************Flashback time***********

It’s almost time for finals, but I couldn’t care less. All I care about is him. My childhood friend, my only friend, my first love, and my boyfriend.

I wait after school for him hiding around a vending machine, using the angles to keep me out of sight. Once he is in my sight I leap hugging him, taking him by surprise.

“I got you!” I cheer. He laughs as we hug. Then he tries to kiss me, though I was still much too young for that. So I pulled away.

The next year we stayed the same.

He aged to 18, I aged to 16. We grew up together, holding hands together, laughing together. Being together.

Then it all stopped.

It started calm.

“This is a really good poem for just Ms. Wallis’ class. Why not enter it in a contest?”

“You know I don’t really want to be a writer.”

“You’re just saying that because I’m a six.”

“It’s not that.”

“If it isn’t how come that is the only time you truly seem yourself? Why do you put in words the things you’d never say? Why do you put writing above even eating at times?”

“I don’t know. Well.. I may love writing but I love you more I just want to be with you!”

“You don’t know what you want Evey! You’re a child!”

“Yes I do I want you! If I’m such a child why are you even with me then?”

***************************************************

I lean back in the seat and look at the time.

One in the morning. It’s time to wake him.

I walk up to the royals hall. I know I shouldn’t be here but I couldn’t send a maid. Then I knock on the door and wait.

“Brooks!” I yell in a hushed voice not wanting to wake anyone.

He groggily opens the door. “What? Evelyn?”

I giggled at his appearance. He was not a very dainty sleeper. “You have bedhead. Anyways, it's time for you to help me with my next book. Get dressed.”

He looked back into his room, presumingly at a clock. “It’s 1am.”

“Yup. This way we won't get in trouble, brains work better at night, and the cold can wake you up.”

He yawns “Fine.” then grabs a sweater and closes the door.

“Where're we going?”

“We're going to escape the palace. I read on a map there's a beach by here. In short we're going exploring.”

“We should tell a guard.”

“That would take the fun out of it. If by some magic they notice we're gone we'll just say you were kind enough to take me on a walk because I couldn't sleep. Just to the gardens.”

“I'm hardly allowed to go anywhere without supervision.”

“Well, you have my supervision. Come on.” I then took his sleeve to slowly drag him along which he doesn't resist.

“Good boy. Nooowwww how do you think we should escape. The beach looks closer to the garden and there's that big woods right by it so I'm guessing there's a weak point there.”

“We are so not going in the woods.”

“And why not?”

“I could be murdered.”

“By a bunny rabbit?”

“By Hooks Heave.”

I laughed, “You'll be fine. If Hooks Heave makes an appearance I'll write in a wolf to maul him.”

“Oh, thank God. I'm so glad I have your writing to rely on regarding my life.”

“You’re very welcome.”

“Are you planning on murdering me?”

“Nope this is not inspiration for Hooks Heave.”

“Damn.”

“Damn? Did you want to die?”

He grinned, “Oh no, I would never be so self deprecating.”

“Somehow I feel like that's sarcasm. Now i'm for sure going to push you into the ocean.”

“Excuse you, I am royalty and I do not take threats like that lightly. Watch yourself, peasant.” He then poked my forehead.

“Right. Dear me, now I may lose my head. All because of some cold salt water.”

“The real world is a cruel, cruel place.”

“Thats an idea for a book. Writing about the crudeness of the world. A woman falls in love with a man only to learn he's a dick then they fight and she finally storms out to leave with their 5 year old daughter. She packs a small suitcase and boards a bus out of town. As the bus leaves a giant octopus comes and crushes the town. Everyone dies but the daughter. The lesson is the world is cruel.”

“Yikes... I see why you need my help. Tsk tsk.” I thought that one was pretty good. Even when you want to escape to a nicer world, the world is not nice and will kill you if you try.

“Well I lost my past inspirations so now I'm just stuck with bad ideas but a good brain. It's a very complicated situation.” I lost him, and I lost her.

“What a tragic time. I don't know about you, but I'm partial to accuracy.”

“Yeah but I don't know what to be accurate about. Even if i took out the octopus the root of that idea sucks. My first book was a love story, the second was a murder mystery, now I need something new but all I have are octopi and hooks heave.”

“Okay, what about a coming of age story?”

“People like those, but that focuses just on one person. I'm not good at that.”

His face brightens, “A challenge!”

I sighed, why’d something I hate so much have to inspire him? “I don't even know where to start with a book like that.”

“Think of a main character.”

“Well I normally base my characters a bit on myself but I can't make it too similar ummm..okay so it's about a young girl, maybe 18. No idea what her name is.”

“Close your eyes.”

“Why?” I ask but close them.

“Just do it. Okay, what is this character like.”

“Ummm. She's a redhead, she's pretty introverted, she can be a bit aggressive and selfish too but that's because she raised well. She likes sweets and cats.” Like you but meaner.

“What's her family like?”

“Her mother and father fight a lot. They stay together for financial reasons. For most of her youth she was neglected as they were trying to divorce but finally settled on living separately but staying married. She later had a half-sister who is much younger than her who's raised under the custody of her father who was a much nicer man than her mother as a female.”

“Does she have friends?”

“Not really. She doesn't go out much because she's scared people will hurt her like her parents did.”

“Is there a love interest in her world?”

“No men are horrible.....” A book with a female lead without a female love interest is risky. It might not sell well.

I sigh, “I guess she can have a male for awhile. But I write tragedies so it'll end with them breaking up somehow.”

“She finds herself, huh?”

“Always better to pick yourself over a man. That's the theme of my first book, not the one you were reading.” It’s what I should have done. Instead he forced me to have no choice but myself.

“Ah, but are you writing your first book?”

“Ah no. I wrote that book in 2 days, dont want a mistake like that again.” I wrote it sobbing, with a fever.

He left me. He made me pick writing over him. He broke me. I didn’t leave my home for a month afterwards. I failed all my classes, I was basically a high school dropout. All I had was a box of tissues, my laptop, my cat, and my feelings. I needed to vent it all out somehow. My first book was how.

“Think of what you want again.”

“Right. Book. New book. Book with brooks. Maybe I'll have it end with her picking her career over her boy.”

“Why can't she do both?” Right Brooks is a prince. He has time to do careers as hobbies along with his caste given duty.

“She's a three, her boyfriends a four and wanted to include her in the family. If she stayed with him she'd have to accept eventually becoming a four and no longer being able to be a writer as her career.” Make it a four. Make it seem better. Safer. Less of a risk. That way the idea of her dropping down a caste seems more possible. Instead of falling three.

“So she chooses work over love?”

“Yes. It's the wise choice. It's what will make her money and keep her afloat in a society which she is already disadvantaged in due to her gender. Because of her upbringing she is also taught to have the practical mindset that would lead her to that choice. Also she wants to make her mother happy so obviously there is no other choice for her.” It’s the choice I should have made. I should have left his ass. I should have won our relationship. Been the empowered woman. Not the deer in the headlights.

“What if she breaks past that?”

“She can't she shouldn't give up what she loves for a man. But I can't end it that way either. Even if he wasn't right for her, she's still a person. No one deserves to just live alone like that, without friends or anyone to love. Maybe she should have just settled so she wouldn't have to be alone with only a cat who would die three months later.”

“Stop writing what you're used to.”

“I don't know what else to write.”

“Do something you're not comfortable with.”

“What about a sci-fi book. I hate those so maybe I could make one I like.”

He laughs. What? I thought that was a legitimate idea. “Open your eyes.”

I open them, happy to see Brooks again. “Thank God I'm not blind. I was starting to get tired.”

“Do you have an idea of what you want to do?”

“I want to go swimming. If I go to bed I'll miss the window the brain is most creative in.”

“You should go to bed.”

“Fine. I'll walk back with you so you don't get murdered.”

“I'm so honored.”

“You should be.” I then held my arm out.

“Here you can even link arms with me that way if Hooks comes at you it'll be easier to hide behind me.”

“What if I'm Hooks?”

That stumped me for a moment. “Hmmm then I guess I deserve to be killed for being dumb enough to not notice, then lead you to a secluded area with me.”

“Let's just head back to the palace. And quickly too. I don't want the press getting the wrong idea.”

“What do you mean wrong idea? Plus I doubt there's any press out and about this late.”

“Well, it's a little weird a selected would be walking with me out here. And they're always around.”

“True but I could explain it. Writers always do crazy things. And thats creepy. Maybe I should write about journalists being aliens from hell.”

“Wouldn't be that far off. Luckily, I'm not in the papers very often.”

“Shocking, you don't want to be a drama llama and win all the attention?”

“'Drama llama'?”

“I like the rhyme, kill me. Your sister clearly shows off that even those who aren't the heir can get all the attention they need.”

He frowned and back away from me, unlinking our arms. “Are you talking about Mal?” Fuck.

“A bit? It's not a judgement just a fact that press likes the way she acts so she gets a lot of attention from them. Why does it matter?” shit.

“It sounds like you're speaking in the negative.” Fuck, fuck, fuck.

“You can't insult my sister to my face, Evelyn.” God I’m a moron.

“Right. Maybe I should not talk about your sisters at all, doesn't seem to go well.”

“Yeah, maybe you shouldn't.” We walked in silence. Great Evey, you are a master of conversation. Insult his sister to his face.

“I trust you can make it to your room from here.”

I apologize once more and leave. It seems everytime we talk I ruin it.

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thebibliomancer · 7 years ago

Text

Essential Avengers: Avengers #135: The Torch is Passed!

May, 1975

Another really great title and another lying cover!

But, again. Flashback mode doesn’t give many options. At least there are some angry faces. Iron Man is so angry that he’s looking away in disgust. Or maybe he just has terrible peripheral vision in that helmet and can’t figure out what everyone else is looking at.

So last time: Hoo boy. Kang attacked multiple times to try to marry the Celestial Madonna who turned out to be Mantis. Defeating him in Limbo, the Avengers then went on a far out time journey to uncover the origins of Mantis and Vision, which involved the robot Human Torch dying multiple times and space intreegue.

When last we left Vision, 1967 Ultron-5 had just KRUMP’d through the wall.

This time: Ultron-5 continues to KRUMP.

Unfortunately, not the dance move.

Apparently the Mad Thinker pointed Ultron towards the Human Torch’s dead deceased corpse. To contextualize this moment in time, the Human Torch’s memorial service was the previous year but Reed Richards kept his ‘respectful gesture’ of leaving the Human Torch to molder in an abandoned underground laboratory a secret.

When Ultron is the one thinking that’s a ‘respectful gesture’ you know you goofed up.

Anyway, Ultron is not alone with a corpse. Because the Mad Thinker’s solitude maddened living computer Quasimodo is also in the area.

Quasimodo begs Ultron to give him a human form. Ultron responds ‘fuck no.’ Because then Quasimodo would be a robot and Ultron doesn’t want the competition.

He also decides to narrate his entire backstory to Quasimodo. Because he’s going to erase this memory anyway and he loves hearing himself talk.

You know most of it. Hank Pym built a crude robot based on his five seconds of research into non-man non-dragon Dragon Man.

Hank Pym was so bad at building robots that not only did he somehow create Ultron-1 so self-aware that it turned itself on before Hank ever activated him, Hank also built him too durable to crush and with lethal weapons equipped.

Hank Pym, how do you fuck up so badly? Pro-tip: Your first attempt at building a machine intelligence? Don’t give it its own means of locomotion and DON’T GIVE IT WEAPONS.

Anyway, Ultron-1 blasts Hank with a hypno-beam to make him forget this incident and abandon this lab.

With his existence now a secret to everyone, Ultron OH YEAHS through the wall in plain sight of several civilians and flees.

Clearly no one saw that or reported it.

He returns a week later to find the lab as abandoned as he hoped. Using the solitude of the abandoned lab, Ultron repaired the lab equipment so he could use it to rebuild and upgrade himself.

And only six days ago, Ultron finished his upgrade into Ultron-5, “the most perfect example of a robot in all the world!”

To again contextualize this into a time frame, this was right after the fight against the Super-Adaptoid. Hank and Jan walk by the house/lab but Hank refuses to go inside, the hypnosis still holding.

Having perfectly upgraded himself to a perfect existence, Ultron decides that his perfect murder plan will require the acquisition of an android. So he went to hunt down the Mad Thinker to ‘borrow’ one of his.

So wait. Where does the new Masters of Evil fit into this? This would seem to imply that he acquired Vision first so did he then always expect the new Masters of Evil to fail?

He sure seemed peeved at the time that his plan failed.

Anyway. Mad Thinker initially avers that he needs all his androids in his latest most doomed scheme to destroy the Fantastic Four. But since he calculates with his mad thinkering that Ultron will attack in 3.8 seconds if he’s not appeased, he asks if Ultron will accept an old, busted android.

Ultron would actually be good with that. He was planning to do a complete overhaul anyway so the more primitive the better.

So Mad Thinker offers him the original Human Torch. “He was more trouble to me than he was worth!”

And then the Mad Thinker realizes he’s been talking to a robot and gives Ultron the oddest look but also gives him directions to that old, abandoned lab.

Thus ends Ultron’s tale. Which I just realized was a flashback inside of a time-travel-assisted flashback. You are bad at your job, Space Phantom disguised as a staff.

Quasimodo asks why Ultron wants an android and Ultron says its because he wants a son!

Which is funny because we’ve seen how Ultron treated Vision. ‘You don’t need a name, you are only meant to obey without thinking!’ Although, there have been human parents as bad.

Quasimodo offers to be Ultron’s son but Ultron blasts him with the hypno-beam to erase this whole conversation, grabs the Torch, and skedaddles.

Because he just heard an incoming noise. And seconds after Ultron has vacated, the Silver Surfer busts into the lab, having been drawn here by Quasimodo’s extreme angst (from Fantastic Four Special #5).

Geez, this is a busy lab.

But now it is time to check in on Team Rest of the Avengers now. When last we left them, they finished the Mantis Origin Journey and saw the beginnings of the Kree empire and the sad fate of the Cotati. And at the end of it, they were transported back to the Eternal Garden of the Priests of Pama where the Avengers had buried the Swordsman, based on a weird gut feeling that Mantis had.

A gut feeling about where to bury Swordsman, I mean.

Ghost Swordsman repeats that today will see THE COMING OF THE CELESTIAL MADONNA! Or maybe we went back a little to repeat that scene.

Mantis demands that Libra, as her self-proclaimed father, explain all this. Libra says its not his right but then a spaceship happens.

Specifically Moondragon.

In previous issues, she responded to the Avengers’ call for Captain Marvel based on a weird gut feeling (a lot of that going around), went to Avengers Mansion, got her shit kicked by possibly possessed Scarlet Witch, and then got back on her spaceship to head to Vietnam to find the Avengers.

And here she is!

Ghost Swordsman asks Moondragon to explain her origin (oh my god origin overdose!) and Moondragon decides okay spoopy ghost man, I trust you.

THANOS!

Is what led her to encounter the Avengers in the past. You remember the Thanos War? I hope so, I’m not explaining it again.

But Thanos also is her tragic backstory. While scouting Earth, he blasted a random automobile because it may have spotted his UFO.

Heather Douglas survived the attack and staggered out of the wreckage to be found by Mentor, ruler of Titan. Who had followed Thanos to Earth to find out what he was up to.

Heather, probably a bit loopy from the experience, assumed Mentor was an angel and begged him to take her to heaven.

So he took her to Titan. And had her placed within the Shao-Lom Monastery, where she learned the full knowledge of body and soul. And grew to be a priestess, an athlete, and a geneticist and took the title Moondragon.

This is actually a double origin. Because although Moondragon’s dad Arthur Douglas died in the crash, his spirit was used by Kronos to create Drax the Destroyer to combat Thanos.

Thanos really does create most of his own problems for himself.

Anyway, Mantis realizes that Moondragon’s backstory is in many respects identical to her own as relayed by Libra. Earth girl trained at an alien temple. Trained to master body and mind. Cool codename.

Back to Vision’s origin.

Six months have gone by, it is now the spring of 1968, and Ultron is getting fed up with this project.

The Human Torch had burned himself out when he died. Ultron had thought that a rebuilding project would involve component and wires but he lacks the understanding to remold plastoid flesh. There are systems in the Human Torch that only the inventor could- oh. Duh.

So Ultron goes off to kidnap Professor Phineas T. Horton. It takes him two additional months to track down Horton, now making a living in Stamford, Connecticut (eesh!) as a television repairman.

And then he just tucks him under his arm and carries him off.

Ultron re-introduces Horton to the Human Torch and demands he help repair him. But Horton refuses. Creating the Human Torch was his crowning achievement and also his downfall. After the Torch escaped, Horton was ostracized by scientific society for creating him and the Torch never, ever returned to his creator.

For three decades he’s been drinking to forget and relying on television repair to get by.

So please, don’t make him face his old shame now that he’s so, so old and so, so drunk.

BACKHAND.

Ultron: “Now get to work, my decadent Gepetto -- get to work and give me a Pinocchio!”

Ultron’s favorite Disney movie is Pinocchio apparently.

So, held hostage, Horton was forced to perform to Ultron’s weird whims. Changing the Torch’s face so he has a completely new life, divorced of his time as a hero. OOO ALSO NEW SUPERPOWERS! Flame is old biz. Give him something that will be the new hotness. Oh but make his face scarlet! ISN’T THAT A HILARIOUS JOKE??

Ultron: “For though he will remain ignorant -- I shall be reminded of his past every time I look upon his flame-hued visage! It is the most subtle of jests professor! Why do you not laugh?”

Ultron and Kang both confirmed for shit senses of humor.

Finally, in September, 1968, the revamp to turn the Human Torch into the Vision is complete (making Vision a Virgo according to a caption).

But if you wanted to know what happened next, then you’d best hold your shorts. We have to check up on the others first.

At the Eternal Garden, Immortus shows up with a glass box and tells Iron Man they’ll learn what it is when the box opens. You sure are vague and smug, Immortus.

And at Avengers Mansion, Jarvis relies on the ancient servant’s gambit of bringing tea and snacks to check up on Wanda. But he hears a malevolent male voice coming from Wanda’s room. But when he busts open the door, the room is dark and deserted.

Wanda, Agatha Harkness, and mysterious malevolent male mirth have vanished.

Okay. back to Vision of September, 1968.

The revamped robot is activated but proclaims himself the Human Torch and angrily questions what happened to his body.

Horton could not bring himself to destroy the Torch’s memories, his soul, even as he was forced to rework his body. Even though he created the Torch for base money reasons, Horton poured his soul into him. Even after all the trouble the creation brought him, he loves his creation. The Human Torch is the high point of his time on Earth.

Ultron is not pleased by this betrayal or with Horton’s “maudlin human nostalgia.” He runs off to grab weaponry he can use to restrain the rampaging Vision Torch but before he does, he eye blasts Horton.

The Vision Torch doesn’t notice this in the midst of his rampage but as he’s wondering if he’s gone to robot hell, he comes across the wounded Horton.

Horton: “my torch, i was not a man for marriage -- yet i wanted an issue, creation, some part of me to live on! i thought of you -- and the thought grew into a dream -- and that dream almost grew into reality! i build you flawed -- just as i was flawed -- but i gave you life. tell me, was i... wrong?”

And then Horton died.

Which on a petty note means that Horton is too dead to show up and retcon this whole story in West Coast Avengers when John Byrne decides that the Vision will be more interesting if he walks back all his character development.

Anyway, he’s dead now. And Vision Torch marches out of the lab wondering what to do with his new life. But he’s definitely coming after Ultron for revenge!

Its not a long search. Ultron is waiting for him.

Ultron asserts that Vision Torch belongs to him. And then there’s a robot rumble.

But even though Vision Torch has added strength to compensate for his lost flame, Ultron outmatches him (especially since Vision Torch doesn’t know how to exploit his density powers). And while he was gone, he grabbed a laser gun that he uses to laser gun Vision Torch to death.

So back to the ol’ drawing board.

Of course, without Horton, its going to be hard to do a mind alteration procedure but Ultron just thought of a cool life hack. He’ll just use this random computer tape recording of Wonder Man’s brain as a model for his robot’s new mind!

Genius!

So far we’ve had Ultron have to borrow an android from the Mad Thinker because he didn’t want to build his own, had to kidnap the original creator because he couldn’t figure out how to revamp the Torch, and then had to use another brain because he couldn’t figure out how to program an artificial intelligence from scrap.

This is a sort of pattern with Ultron. Vision was based on Wonder Man’s brain. Jocasta from the Wasp’s. Alkhema was based on Mockingbird’s. And in Ultron Unlimited Ultron kidnaps Hank Pym, the Wasp, the Vision, the Scarlet Witch, Wonder Man, and the Grim Reaper to use their brain patterns to create a new race of robots.

But since it was later revealed that Ultron himself was based on Hank Pym’s brain patterns, it kind of makes sense. Ultron can’t create a mind from scratch because his mind wasn’t created from scratch.

Anyway, using already existing brain patterns is apparently a great life hack. Because the new mostly blank slate Vision is ready that same evening.

But we know how that turned out. He sent Vision against the Avengers. Vision turned on him and helped the Avengers destroy him. And now Vision knows he did not spring full blown from Ultron’s mind. His genesis was in one of the greatest heroes the world has ever seen.

And since he learned his origin, now its time to return to Immortus.

But something goes wrong. Instead of finding himself back in Limbo or the Eternal Garden, Vision finds himself floating adrift in a black void. The Synchro-Staff vanished from his hands. Abandoned and no apparent way home.

Next time: the fate of the Vision, nine surprise supervillains, and the moment of the Celestial Madona. Sounds like a lot for one issue, right?

Well, its another Giant-Size Avengers next time! Geez. That will be three Giant-Size issues for the Celestial Madonna Saga. In addition to eight regular-sized issues so far. Englehart really had a lot of story to tell.

#Avengers #Ultron #the Vision #Human Torch #Mantis #Moondragon #Celestial Madonna Saga #Essential Avengers #Essential marvel liveblogging #Ultron is a bad dad and a derivative inventor #fight me #the plot thickens even further

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