#fix my focus

[delicourse]

lesbian pride moment 😳🌸

[shalom-iamcominghome]

If even acknowledging antisemitism within your community spaces is going to "distract from the cause," maybe that's because the foundation of your beliefs comes down to antisemitism. What you're doing is telling on yourself.

[reineydraws]

i have this fic series i'm still working on where mihawk sort of becomes rayleigh's kid and spends ages 11-17ish on the oro jackson.

shanks and buggy imprint on him (bugs considers him a sort of older brother figure/sparring inspiration and shanks has a crush that eventually turns into full-blown love) and this is how i imagine they're like on the day mihawk sets off on his own haha.

[localguy2]

I find it highly amusing how in situations where the ninja are separated/it's just the OG four, Kai and Zane immediately assume control/start spearheading the team because apparently no one else is sane enough or in the right mind to do so.

Your honour, they literally have one of the best dynamics in the show, with how they're probably the most protective people in the team. And it makes me mad how this is overlooked by the fandom and the show.

[fluffylord]

The man who holds the universe in his eyes

[kazamajun]

[fullmetalbee]

I was listening to the GTN audiobook and I was at the bit from chapter 21 where Camilla mentions that soul siphoning normally causes brain damage, and that Colum probably does have brain damage:

And now I can't stop thinking about Augustine basically calling Cristabel an idiot in chapter 17 of HTN

Was it just the siphoning??

[cluelessbees]

Yknow what ? I think Byler getting Murray’d would be more heartfelt than anything else.

Because like-

Murray doesn’t just call out Jopper and Jancy because it’s obvious. He points it out because he knows they’re being stupid. In their cases, it’s really just them not communicating their feelings to one another and trying to pretend they don’t exist.

But with Byler it’s like…it’s different.

Because it’s not just that is it? We’re not just watching two people pine over one another whilst being oblivious to the fact they other likes them back. We’re not just looking at two people who can’t communicate well. There’s more to it.

Because they’re two boys who have been best friends since childhood. They grew up at the peak of the AIDS epidemic. They live in a small town and they’re expected to act a certain way. It’s different for them.

I don’t think Murray is gonna waltz in acting all holier than thou and essentially out both Mike and Will to one another. He’s a smart man as we’ve seen. He’s attentive. He doesn’t just call jancy and jopper out to prove a point he knows what they both need to hear so they can get over their miscommunication hurdle.

I think he’s going to go up to them. Either both or just Mike or Will or whatever, and he’s going to talk to them about it. Because that’s what they need. They need someone to talk to them about it. And I don’t think he would start with just directly talking about it. I think he (and this is me headcanonning Murray as queer) would open up first. Like about his own experiences- to show them that he gets it, and he knows what it’s like. And then he would casually bring up the whole byler thing.

Hmmm something along the lines of...

Okay– picture a conflict Mike Wheeler sitting by himself – either on the couch or on the floor or whatever. And, he’s stuck in his head. A lot had happened. He broke up with El and he’s struggling to grasp what he’s feeling about his best friend. And there's this…weird tension between them that– he just– he can't put his finger on. But they’re off. They aren’t clicking like they used to and Mike can’t seem to fix things. 

So he sat alone, trying to understand or comprehend whatever he’s feeling whilst everyone else is god knows where in the house. Will was in the kitchen though. Mike knew that much. And then suddenly, he felt a weight on the couch seat next to him or the space on the floor beside him was no longer there and he heard the words of Murray Bauman pull him out of his thoughts with the weirdest fucking ice-breaker he has ever heard.

“Y’know…I was like you when I was younger.” 

“Really?” Mike asked – mostly out of disbelief as he scanned Murray. No way. Not a chance. 

“Oh yeah…” Murray smiled, nodding to himself as he continued. “I know it's hard to believe it, but I was this…brash, stubborn, reactive teen who loved going against authority. I was very...headstrong in my beliefs.” 

He paused and Mike turned to him. Murray had his head down, looking at his lap silently, and Mike didn’t know what to do but watch or…more– listen to the silence. 

“And…I was also in my head a lot.” Murray looked up, turning to Mike once before looking forward again. “I was angry at things – at people and at myself because…no matter how much I pretended like I loved being a freak…a part of me hated that I wasn’t normal…”

Mike felt cold. His heartbeat raced as he turned away from Murray – facing forward and staring at his lap as he continued to listen.

“Yeah?”

“Oh yeah…I was-- going through a lot of stuff internally that I tried pretending didn’t exist.” He paused again – taking a deep breath. “I was…in love with someone who I didn’t want to be in love with.”

“...You were?” 

“Yeah…” Murray laughed to himself. “Yeah…it was– well he was…my best friend.”

Mike held his breath.

“I fell for him. And I was mad at myself for falling for him. Because even though I knew it wasn’t wrong…I just kept thinking about how I wasn’t supposed to like him. Because that’s not normal– Well ‘normal.’” Murray airquoted, rolling his eyes. Mike’s eyes were glued onto him at this point. 

“So…I grew angrier. And I took it out on myself. On him. Even though he didn’t deserve it. Even though I loved him– I just..I let my fear get the better of me and I pushed him away until I lost him…And I hated myself for doing that.” He breathed, another pause, before finally turning to Mike. “It took me a long time to realise that there was nothing wrong about loving someone.”

Murray tilted his head towards the direction of the kitchen as he raised his eyebrows – and it clicked to Mike.

“I..” Mike’s throat felt dry. “You know?”

“I had a hunch.”

“Is it obvious? Does he–”

“No, he doesn’t know. Your secret's safe with me, kid.”

“Okay– good.” Mike paced his breathing. “I just…I– I can’t lose him because of this. If he knew– if– if he knew he would–”

“He’s your best friend right?” Murray cut him off.

“What? Yes but–”

“Then. he could never hate you, Mike. Not about this.”

“How do you know that?”

“Call it…another one of my hunches.” Mike knitted his brows together.

“Look – kid, I’m not going to force you to tell him or anything. It's your choice at the end of the day. And I can’t say much, but it doesn’t take a genius to know how much that boy cares about you. And you care about him, correct?”

Mike nodded. 

“And you trust him?”

Mike nodded again. “With my life.”

“So…all I can say is…if you trust him? Then...trust him with this.” Murray began to stand up. “Take it from me. Holding it in only hurts the both of you.”

And then Murray leaves

Anyways yeah thoughts––

[belovedstill]

svsss 10th anniversary snippets ◀ [ 6/7 ] ▶ the voice @ ao3 | bingqiu | disciple years, lbh is aware of the system

Shizun acts differently these days and it might have something to do with the voice in Binghe's head. Well, it's not a voice in his head per se, more like—a voice without a body. It converses with Shizun, gives him reminders, and threatens him.

And it seems that Luo Binghe is the only other person who can hear it.

It hasn't always been the case! He doesn't remember the strange voice during his entry into the sect. Unless it was more conscious of its presence back then, Binghe doesn't recall it urging Shizun to… to pour tea over his head. Or have him strung, the first time. Or have him whipped, any of the times.

The voice appeared together with hushed whispers of Shizun qi-deviating in his sleep. It wasn't fatal, or else Zhangmen-shibo’s face would wear a mourning look rather than worry. Ning-shijie heard that there were suspicions of possession that, in the end, remained unconfirmed.

But that fateful moment Shizun woke up from the post qi-deviation fever, his body seemed to be occupied by more than just his soul. Luo Binghe remained silent about it, if only for the fear of being thought the one possessed and removed from the life his mother had dedicated her final years to secure for him.

Shizun gives him medicine and argues with the voice, unnoticed by Ming Fan.

The voice screeches in the distance when Ming Fan is about to deal a blow, right before he’s cut by something sharp.

Shizun smiles at him, and the voice taunts him with “Oh, Oh, See”, as if it’s always watching. The smile is immediately replaced with a scowl.

Binghe discovers he quite likes it when Shizun smiles.

The voice refuses to help Shizun when he’s trapped by the Skinner Demon. It seems to punish him in some way for reasons beyond Binghe’s understanding. It rewards him for killing the demon and assuring Binghe he’ll always be there to keep him safe.

This is a much nicer version of Shizun than the one Luo Binghe first met, even if he’s haunted by the strange ghost with an even stranger power over him.

After he moves into the room in Shizun’s bamboo house, he sometimes hears Shizun pacing late at night, back and forth, back and forth, coming close to his closed door and walking away, silent except for a muttered question here and there. He asks about some future event. The voice insists it’s unavoidable. Shizun’s eyes always look heavier after nights like those, so he makes sure to make his breakfast with even more care on those days.

The heaviness clears a little and Shizun smiles, even if it’s tinged with an unnamed emotion.

There are long stretches of time when the voice doesn’t appear and Shizun’s expression remains easy and light and kind. That’s when Luo Binghe allows himself to meddle just the slightest bit: stumbling during sword practice just so Shizun tuts at him and helps correct his posture, inserting himself into the role Ming Fan previously used to fill, preparing tea and snacks and surprise desserts unprompted. Shizun smiles, pats his head and praises, and Binghe feels like he could surely grow wings right now and fly.

—

Demonic monsters have entered the Jue Di Gorge. Some disciples have died. Senior cultivators have come to their rescue.

Shizun finds him amid a terrified bunch of other sects’ competitors. Binghe feels relief.

With Shizun there, nothing bad will ever happen.

Except the ground shakes and opens along with a fiery rift. A large, demonic man clad in expensive robes walks through a portal.

The voice is back. Shizun is deathly pale. He holds Xiu Ya and stands in front of Binghe, ready to fight, with no spiritual energy to guide it in a distance combat.

The demon looks their way and tilts his head.

Luo Binghe tastes real fear for the second time in his life.

—

He should have feared for his own life.

—

Curled on the barren land surrounded by heavy crimson fog and the stench of rot, Luo Binghe feels painfully, utterly alone for the first time in what feels like a lifetime.

Deep inside, he hopes that—that Shizun will come get him. Surely, he’ll fight the voice and destroy its source and will open the hellish rift to this place with the same hands that stroked his hair so sweetly. He will take his hands and pull him up and they’ll go home.

Hasn’t Shizun said that no matter what happened to him, Binghe would be safe? The voice threatened to remove his soul if he didn’t comply, if he didn’t push Binghe over the edge, but Shizun has in the past sacrificed himself twice for him, so why wouldn’t he do so again…?

(Shizun’s eyes looked so scared during the second the world stood still.)

Any time now. He will come. He will. He will.

Buy days pass and nobody arrives. Luo Binghe cuts his palms open on the shards of his heart, trying to hold them together, and stuffs them in his inner robes for later use.

Even when he starts to doubt Shizun’s motivations and the existence of the voice—he hears so many voices now, his head pounds with them, has he always simply imagined it?—he keeps going.

If Shizun doesn’t come get him, he’ll get out and go to him himself.

[wikipediadogdotnet]

WAYNE’S HIT & RUN

+ image referenced

[skunkes]

[user-name-h3re]

i'm posting these mediocre sketches before school kicks my ass again

[citrussunrises]

New coping mechanism: drawing perry.

[kunikisss]

keegan face hcs or smt. idk. he’s all i ever think about

i do not know whats going on with his hair and he doesnt either

[quietly-sleeping]

I'll admit I'm a sucker for qijiu, (this could be my hyperfixation on sy talking), but I think those idiots deserve someone who's brand of chaos isn't murder. Or self sacrifice over deeply internalized guilt.

[kyurochurro]

exploring the woods with some little buddies!!🌿