#five out of fifteen

[samualcheese]

not expecting this to get as many likes as the old one but hey. i remade that lineup

Happy halloween btw ! i was locking in on this so i didnt have time to make something for it. sad

[404-art-found]

I know you're feening for uncertainty, but I'm not scared!

[actuallykatz]

[bumblingbabooshka]

St Voyager Memes: Tuvok sitting in the corner of the mess hall always reading and always alone is so y/n of him

[jtl-fics]

Fluent Freshman - Part 13

PREVIOUS

“I can’t believe you would go out on Black Friday to grocery shop but I guess thanks for going out on Black Friday to grocery shop.” Aaron greets him with as FF moves over to the table.

Andrew and Captain Neil had apparently went out shopping.

Andrew and Captain Neil had apparently come back and have been in Andrew’s room for the past couple hours.

“Josten probably wanted to go to Excites for some gear. I don’t know what my brother sees in that Exy-obsessed jerk.” Aaron says as he eats his own smiley eggs and bacon. FF hears the sound of a hammer and a drill from Andrew’s room.

Heart in his throat he forces himself not to think about what Andrew and Captain Neil COULD be building.

(A guillotine, an iron maiden, that weird wedge thing that splits people in half at the groin, He should NOT have taken that Spanish history class. Oh god it’s probably a fence so he can’t escape whatever hunting ground Andrew is going to drag him to if he can’t buy his continued existence via baked good.)

“Shut up, they’re actually really sweet to one another.” Nicky chastises before turning to FF, “Because of that your final serving goes to Smithy. He deserves it more than you.” Nicky says and slides the final plate of eggs and bacon.

“He’s just as bothered by it as I am!” Aaron scowls.

“By what?” FF asks because there are a lot of things that bother him so Aaron is going to have to be more specific.

“By those two being all close. I’ve seen the way you turn and walk away.” Aaron reaches across the table for his bacon but FF just pushes the plate closer to him. The two plates he had already eaten were more than enough, especially after the full dinner that they’d had the night before. “You’re grossed out by it too right?” He asks as he goes to stab the bacon.

FF slides the plate away and Aaron stabs the table.

FF is NOT HOMOPHOBIC.

His gran raised him better than that.

“I don’t agree with you.” He says because he doesn’t but can’t bring himself to say anymore. He’s in Aaron’s house, he stole Aaron’s keys that morning to lock up the house.

(it was so rude but what if someone broke in because he left the house unlocked? What if someone got hurt just because he wanted to ensure his own survival? Isn’t it better that he just borrowed Aaron’s keys to make sure that no one in the house got hurt? Does FF still believe with every fiber of his being that Andrew Minyard is trying to murder him in this exact house? Yes. Can these concerns coexist peacefully? Also yes.)

If anything he finds Captain Neil and Andrew to be an incredibly nice couple. They talk about things together, they make plans about their future, their PDA was actually pretty minimal (especially in comparison to Aaron), and he had figured out the weird code Andrew talked in so he was pretty sure that Andrew and Neil loved one another.

The only issue he has with the couple is that they are out at a store probably buying supplies to torture and then kill FF.

Otherwise they were perfectly fine.

Aaron scowls, “You can’t be serious. You walk away faster than you run on the court when you see the two of them getting all gross.” He points with his fork and tries to grab the bacon again.

FF frowns deeper.

“I walk away even faster from you and your girlfriend.” He returns because Aaron and Katelyn are the couple who have been the MOST guilty of initiating something in front of him when he was in ‘Visible only when the sunlight strikes him at the exact right angle on the summer solstice’ mode.

 He had tried to clear his throat to get them to quit quite a few times but…well…he has heard Katelyn mention that one of her and Aaron’s favorite ‘hang out’ spots might be haunted….so he hadn’t been overly successful.

“PDA makes me uncomfortable in general. Captain Neil and Andrew are a very nice couple who you shouldn’t talk bad about.” He defends as one of the only people who would know exactly how thoughtful the two were to one another.

He hopes his Gran is proud of him for saying something.

Aaron looks at him with a twisted mouth for a while before relenting, “Fine they’re not that bad. It’s just a big brother thing.” Aaron rolls his eyes.

FF swallows down some acid in his throat and pushes the smiling eggs and bacon over to Aaron who smiles back at the breakfast and proceeds to eat it.

A big brother thing.

FF gets up and heads over to the final bag that Andrew had left out on the counter. FF had bought some additional offerings for his mortal soul to tide Andrew over while he made the brownies. It’s also where the incense and his latest two five hour energies should still be.

He finds the incense, wonders if he hallucinated the five hour energies (very possible), and hands Nicky a box of sour patch kids to distract him when he comes over.

“Smithy, why the hell are you lighting incense?” Nicky asks because the sour patch kids were NEVER going to be enough to distract Nicky. That would take something on the level of Swedish Fish but he’d been more focused on avoiding the candy thrown by an irate woman towards a member of Target staff because the grocery department couldn’t get her the redemption coupon for one of the flat screens in the Electronic department so he had FAILED to procure them. He’d even seen a box sail through the air is bullet time because his brain was too hopped up on Five Hour Energy but he’d let it go believing he could just grab a box at check out. THEN HE ZONED OUT IN THE CHECK OUT LINE AS HE STARED AT BOTH THE FUTURE AND THE PAST AND FORGOT HE WAS IN THE PRESENT WHERE HE HADN’T GOTTEN THE DAMN SWEDISH FISH.

“I’m going to make my Great Grandma’s brownies.” He says in response, “I’m hoping to channel her so I don’t mess up.” He says.

“Oh! More grandma baking goodies?! I can be your assistant baker! What do you need?” Nicky says visibly vibrating with excitement at the prospect. “We can listen to Mariah and I can lick the spoon!”

There is a noise of revulsion from the kitchen table.

“Don’t let him lick the spoon Smiths! He gets WEIRD about it.”

“That sounds like what someone who wants to lick the spoon would say.”

“Oh shut up!”

“That’s not a NO!”

The cousins continue to argue about spoon licking rights as FF gets started checking to make sure that the kitchen has all the necessary equipment to even make his brownies. He’d been so tired (last night? This morning?) that he hadn’t thought about even checking that the cousins would have things like a glass bowl, an baking dish, pie tin, etc.

Thankfully FOR ONCE luck is on his side and FF does not have to walk back to the Target.

So he finishes pulling out everything he’ll need, getting the oven pre-heated, and pulling out the ingredients for the brownies from the fridge.

He lights some incense with the stove top burners sends a quick prayer up and wonders if maybe a ouija board would have been better but if the Home Goods section had been a dangerous spot then the toy section would have been like walking into an active war zone. There are no laws as far as parents are concerned when it comes to getting the ‘it’ toy for their kids. FF has watched the highs and lows of humanity in the Barbie aisle more than once.

So he melts chocolate, he sifts flour and sugar, he separates eggs, and he uses every muscle that Kevin’s insane work out regiment had given his arms to whip those egg whites into stiff peaks. He knows his great gran is with him when Nicky and Aaron continue to argue (they are now talking about the ethics of licking the spoon vs. licking the bowl? He doesn’t quite get how they got there but alright) so Nicky doesn’t hear him say “Stiff Peaks Acquired” to himself because he knows Nicky well enough to know that he would have NEVER heard the end of it.

He uses all of the delicacy his gran had ever tried to teach him to fold those egg whites into the chocolate and then to fold in the flour and sugar. There are more steps, more ingredients, but unless you are family then those are CLASSIFIED.

Great Gran had always been the suspicious sort.

The oven beeps to let him know it’s done pre-heating as he’s carefully transferring his great gran’s life’s work into the baking dish.

He was so focused that he hadn’t even realized that Andrew was back until he turned to do the dishes and found Andrew holding the bowl and running his fingers through the scant remaining mix and shoving it into his mouth.

He is surprise that the scream remains in his head. He’s even more surprised that he stays upright. Maybe the nap did him some good even if it let Andrew and Captain Neil build whatever torture device they were intending to use on him.

He really needs to drink some pepto. He doesn’t think that Andrew will pause their ‘The Most Dangerous Game’ recreation to let FF manage his ulcers. Andrew is staring straight at him.

Andrew offers him the spoon.

FF declines. Raw eggs, sugar, and chocolate? With THIS stomach? He’d almost prefer to be chased through whatever enclosure Andrew is going to drag him to.

“When did you wake up?” Andrew asks.

“Hour ago.” He answers.

“Hm.”

“I’ll make the pie tomorrow.” he ventures trying to extend his life by another day.

Andrew shoves the spoon into his own mouth after that and walks out into the dining room. FF hears both Aaron and Nicky’s cries of anguish.

FF looks at the brownies in the oven at the incense burning on the counter and wonders if that was Andrew’s way of confirming his stay of execution.

MASTERPOST FOR ALL PARTS OF FLUENT FRESHMAN AU

NEXT

Per your requests:

@i-have-three-feelings @blep-23 @dreamerking27 @andreilsmyreligion @belodensetdust @rainbowpineapplebottle @yarn-ace @iwouldlikesometea @lily-s-world @obscureshipsandchips @booklover242 @whataboutmyfries @sahturnos @pluto-pepsi @dreamerthinker @passinhosdetartaruga @leftunknownheart @aro-manita-muscaria @hologramsaredead @Chaoticgremlinswishtheycouldbeme @tntwme @tayspots @nick-scar @crazy-fangirl2524​ @blue-jos10​ @stabbyfoxandrew​ @splishsplashyouropinionistrash​ @sammichly​ @the-broken-pen​ @bitchesdoweknowu​ @very-small-flower​ @ghostlyboiii​ @its-a-paxycab​ @bisexual-genderfluid-fan​ @cheesecookie​ @theoneandonlylostsock​ @foxsoulcourt​ @blueleys @adverbialstarlight​ @elia-nna​ @can-i-just-stay-in-the-corner​ @nikodiangel​ @foxandcrow-inatrenchcoat​ @hallucinatedjosten​ @satanic-foxhole-court​ @vexingcosmos​ @chalilodimun​ @insectsgetcooked​ @angry-kid-with-no-money​ @queer-crows​ @lilyndra @themugglemudperson​ @readertodeath​ @apileofpillows​ @mortalsbowbeforeme​ @hellomynameismoo​ @next-level-mess @youreonlylow​ @interstellarfig​

As stated before if you’re up here and I spelled it right but you didn’t  get a notification there might be something switched around in your  settings that won’t let me tag you properly?

[kyoukamybeloved]

on dazai and chuuya (part 3):

part 1 part 2

(also please reblog if you saw this in the search bar/tags cause I was shadow banned so I want to know if that issue is resolved or not)

edit: thanks to those who said they saw it in the tags, im out of tumblr jail yippee

[chiropteracupola]

challenge for ME to actually do WORK at SOME POINT IN THIS DAY

[laurenttheninth]

i have been a tommy-is-abby’s-tommy truther from the start idc about “ooh well why wouldn’t she know anyone at the 118” or “oooh why wouldn’t she have mentioned her ex was also a firefighter” idgaf it would be so fucking funny and im manifesting that this is one of the bucktommy hurdles let us all join hands in prayer 🙏🏻

[arctic-hands]

For real tho health freaks who scream about how sugar and salt will kill us all and try to push for restrictions on things like candy and chips for SNAP recipients or politicians who try from time to time to replace food stamps all together and give out Government Approved Staples like bread and peanut butter and Government Cheese are gonna kill a whole lotta sick and disabled people like

Diabetics

POTS sufferers

Hypotensives

People with peanut allergies

People with celiac disease or wheat allergies

The lactose intolerant

People who can't eat solid food

People who are undernourished for any reason and need all the calories they can pack on

So-called "picky eaters" who can't tolerate certain tastes and textures without getting violently ill

A myriad of other human conditions that cannot be neatly tallied into categories because the human body and human experience is vast and infinitely variable

But I don't think ableds really care about us and our health like they like to claim so they can harass us about it, do you?

[mybraindumpsterfire]

The time has come for Dan and I to fight to the death to win Princess Philip’s hand and I don’t care that Dan’s a feral watch dog, I WILL WIN TO BE ABLE TO HOLD HANDS WITH BEAUTIFUL BABYGIRL PHIL😡

[kamari2038]

Now that I've *mostly* cleared my head, A FEW THOUGHTS:

(1) Hank is really frickin’ passionate about the deviant cause. When Connor LETS HIM DIE to try and save the deviants, he’s mildly pissed but they’re still friends. But when my man is just DOING HIS JOB AND TRYING TO SAVE HUMANITY, Hank is not only aggressive, but so hostile that Connor can BEG FOR HIS LIFE, try to reason with him, point out the irony of believing all androids are alive yet still denying Connor’s personhood, but if Connor doesn’t have the heart to murder Hank first, then Hank will DANGLE AND THEN DROP HIM OFF THE EDGE OF A BUILDING EVEN IF HE LITERALLY SAVED HANK’S LIFE MULTIPLE TIMES EARLIER IN THE GAME (which is that much more traumatizing for my head canon of this Connor, which is that it took him an unusually long time to die after falling from the rooftop in hostage)

(2) Hank must fully expect that Connor is secretly a deviant and send him to Jericho with the full expectation that Connor will join the deviants, because otherwise this scene makes no dang sense.

Y’all, I still love Hank, but I am PISSED OFF about this. Just a reminder that he’s still only human and kind of messed up, I guess. Clancy Brown scares the SHIT out of me now. That look of helplessness and betrayal on Connor's face as he's held on by his coat above the ledge will haunt me forever.

[samualcheese]

(REALLY OUTDATED) its ironic on how i hate actual math irl

Been wanting to do a lineup of my designs for a while... all designs here are subject to change by the way (specially one...i struggle a little with her)

[robinyourcreator]

mentors! teachers! librarians! old ladies you see at the grocery or the knitting shop once in a while! middle aged men who are regulars at the same hardware store! the teenagers who come to the local game shops board game events and THEIR little siblings!

do you believe you dont share common humanity with any of these people?????

or do you have bizarre ideas gatekeeping the "sanctity" of friendship limiting it to only people you could have gone to high school with???

"what do a 19 and a 28 year old even have in common"

WE ARE ON THIS BIG BEAUTIFUL BLUE EARTH AT THE SAME TIME, ENJOYING THE GLORIOUS EXPERIMENT THAT IS HUMANITY, GOOD SIR!!!!!

this isnt even about dating-- like fuck no you couldnt PAY me to date someone in their early twenties NOW!!! but this is how we're being about FRIENDSHIP??????

[actuallykatz]

back at it again with the numbers

[figofswords]

anybody remember the stephanie brown essay I was working on under a research grant fully last summer? yeah it’s not done yet it super needs to be done and I’ve been avoiding working on it for weeks. someone tell me to just do it already

[sastielsfandom]

The End of Hollandween

Here is a complete list and summary of all the fics I wrote; in order; during October:

Treats In The Making

Summary: Eileen and Sam decide they want to go over the top for Jack for Halloween. Unfortunately for them, going over the top is a lot of work.  

My Babysitter’s Kevin Freaking Solo

Summary: Kevin somehow gets roped into watching Garth’s twins and Jack. He blames Dean.

Dinner And A Show

Summary: Dean is showing Cassie one of his favorite movies while they eat takeout, but gets distracted by something much greater than a movie, Cassie. 

Blending In

Gabriel and Dean find themselves in a mug painting cafe much to Den’s dismay and all to Gabriel’s delight.

Jumping To Cloud Nine

Castiel and Meg find a trampoline and Dean makes it his problem. 

Guinea Pig

Sam wants to do something special for Castiel and decides to surprise him. 

3 And A Half Men

Dean, Adam, and Sam are handed a baby. 

The Phone May Ring, But It’s Not Being Picked Up

It’s not that Peter is avoiding Mr. Stark’s phone calls, it’s just he’s not trying to be lectured for certain things… Like turning off “important” parts of his suit. He knows what he’s doing. (To a degree.)

Fallen Deaf To His Ears

What do you do when you find out you can no longer hear anything around you? You torment your younger brother because you can no longer lose arguments. 

Sleeping Beauties

Exam season is hitting everyone hars, Sam’s not even an acquaintance with sleep anymore. They’re strangers. However, even through his foggy state he can focus on the important things like Jess. That alone had him running to get home.

Extracurricular Activities

Dean tricks Sam and Cas into wearing matching costumes and hopes to kick them out of the bunker for the night. Her plan did not go quite as she expected.

Lonely

Kenji and Darius know each other too well to believe each other’s lies but if they call each other out they’d have to confront their emotions and it’s late, who has time for that?

Keeping Up With Jack 

Everyone is being interviewed about their experiences with Jack. And everyone has interesting stories to tell.

No Escape

Sam can’t handle the forced detox, she knows her time is running out. But she’s not the only one and Castiel can’t sit back and watch any longer. 

Piling On

Superheroes aren’t born in a day, they don’t have all the right answers. Or decisions. Which is why Peter didn’t think too much about the consequences of falling asleep underneath rubble. 

Taking It As A Sign

Dean is a big supportive brother who needs to harp on his younger brother for signing, “Fuck you,” to a pretty girl despite signing all the time. Sam didn’t want to hear it but Dean makes sure he does.

Cat Like Instincts

Magda, Jack, and Elijah find a cat on a walk and decide to bring it home. Dean senses the kids are up to something and wants to prove it despite Sam and Castiel’s wishes not to. 

Morning Chaos

Jack is vlogging a typical morning of course chaos ensues. 

Something About Cars and Such

Dean believes Cas has an addiction to car washes, Castiel disagrees. They’re addicted to something, but it isn’t car washes, it’s something much sweeter and taller. 

Brought Together

A twist on there was only one bed, in fact there were two, but magic kept them from being able to be on different beds. 

Peter Did Not Have It In The Bag

Peter has the brilliant idea to dress up as Spider-Man for a Halloween party. It doesn’t pan out how Peter thought it was going to. 

Superheroes

Dean is rounding everyone up to go trick or treating; cracking jokes the entire time. He may have been the only one laughing, but at least someone was cracking up. 

We’re All In This Together

Dean is curious about Eileen’s Halloween costume and all Hell breaks loose after that. 

Oh How The Corruption Spreads

Castiel is reflecting on Sam’s fate, and needs to do something about it.

Treat or Treat

Dean is not a fan of Castiel and Sam’s version of trick or treat. And runs to Eileen for help. 

Cold Feet

Castiel is human and learning how to navigate their new life as one. Sam is very helpful, but there are some bits that are impossible for Castiel.

Humoring

Dean finds it very funny to throw the most crude jokes at Castiel to see their reaction, but seems to forget, Castiel has a sense of humor too. 

Quality Time Together

Dean misses his brother, but it’s not Sam or Adam. Castiel is a little shit about it though.

Confessions

Castiel goes to Dean for advice and questions the actuality of getting good advice.

Will You?

Castiel turns to Sam for help with the Empty, and is still surprised by Sam’s determination.

The Day We Met

Dean isn’t sure why the Hell Castiel likes Halloween so much until he finally just asks the angel. The answer isn’t all that surprising.