emotionallydeteriorating

[emotionallydeteriorating]

i was js born w bad luck

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hate evryone hate myself too

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where my globoy at

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and i cant breathe

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evrything hurts its been hurting

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my heart aches

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i feel like a loser when i am around people i hate myself sm why cant i be like them why am i like this when will i be able to fix myseld. i dont do shit thay will make someone proud of me i dont think. i cant even get myself to do things that will make a change in my life and the people i love. i dont wanna be a disappointment fr but the things ik doing rn leads me to that path where i dont wanna be. i dont know how to save myself from ts. i js want to die and if god isnt gonna fucking kill me then why cant he fix shit for me it makes me cry knowing how i have hurt people rn too i have tears in my eyes evrytime i think ab ts i end up crying. i beg god to fix evrything im so tired of this. i only pray to god to fix me cus i wanna give the people i love what they deserve that is good things which theyve been giving me ever since i was born. my head starts hurting when i think ab this i want to scream and cry and i js want this to get better. i rly would km$ cus idgaf ab ts shit. but i cant do it cus there r ppl who will have to be sad ab me and i dont want them to blame themselves for something that i do to myself. this is no fun i don’t like to be alive i didnt ask to be here what am i doing here. if i was js born to be a loser then whats the point of existing why cant i js die without making everyone sad. i have so much guilt in my heart and it hurts everyday everytime. i only do bad things to people. theres nothing good ab me i hate myself i hate this so much like im so tired of ts bs bro no shit. its so hard to walk with all the guilt in my heart it hurts rly. i js want to run away from my thoughts idk. when im happy or something good has happened i get scared cus ik ts is only temporary when and at the end of the day ik how its gonna be again. i get scared cus ik god will take anyrhing away from me that makes me happy. well not always hit sometimes but im still grateful for the things that have happened that were good but still again it didnt change anything for the people i hurt so idk. i honestly dont even feel shit idk i cant do normal things that people do i dont experience things that people my age do i js rot rot rot and let my thoughts consume me. iwhen i feel soemthing its like all emotions together otherwise its like i don’t feel anything? like what is happening dude. i js dont understand this. i cant think anything positive or any good thing happening with me bc i js know thats not whats gonna happen and not like i deserve it idk and anyways theres no point in thinking good when u already know whats gonna happen why would i wanna disappoint myself by thinking positive cus ik that the outcome is always negative. idk bro im tired

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alr bro 😭

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LMAOO CRAZYYY

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its always like this n i hate it

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perhaps i should sleep

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waiting for somethinf thats never gonna happen

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Xbox (2001)

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k

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im my only follower and im the only one seeinf my tumblr posts😭😭

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omg posting here is fun ngl

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no heart but i do i wish i had one