#five hargreeves x male!reader
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panandinpain0 · 2 years ago
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Can you do a five hargreeves x male reader fluff where five saves the reader from a robber at the bank and then convinces his dad to let him go and see the boy because his (reader) older brother wanted to thank them with tea and cookies
Wanted to Say Thanks
Okay- so this turned out differently than you requested and I expected- but I really like it. I hope you do too! Sorry for not doing the full thing. <3
Fluff Five Hargreeves x Male!Reader
Warnings: Kinda ooc, swearing, blood
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The Umbrella Academy was at it again, chaos erupting within the bank. People outside crowded around, gawking at the violence sounding from the brick building; police having to keep them back.
(Y/N) was unfortunately on the wrong side of the police barrier; inside the building. He had been running some errands for his neighbors for some extra cash, and when he got to the bank, robbers arrived.
Hiding behind the registers (where he'd been since the thieves showed their guns) (Y/N) had his hands on his knees, body in the fetal position and wide eyes staring ahead. He had no idea what to do in this situation. He'd never had to know before.
"I heard a rumor..." He heard from nearby.
A tentacle whipped the wall in front of him, a man's body dropping in a pool of his own blood.
Oh God.
(Y/N) gasped and threw himself back to get away from the probably dead body.
"There's someone back there!" Someone yelled before a blond teenager appeared crouching in front of (Y/N).
"Hey! You okay-?!"
The teenager was cut off as he was thrown backwards, shouting in surprise.
Well, there went (Y/N)'s only chance of leaving this place.
A scream bellowed closer and another man joined the corpse on the floor. He was beaten and bruised, panting like a dog with eyes as rabid as one.
Much to (Y/N)'s dismay, the man caught sight of him. His anger faded as he smiled dangerously, slipping a knife from the side of his jeans and pulling (Y/N) to his feet.
(Y/N) struggled against the man, a shout turning into a gasp as the knife was placed to his throat. The attackers arm went around (Y/N)'s shoulders to keep him in place as his excitement was replaced, again, with rage.
"Hey!" He screamed, spit flying from his mouth as (Y/N)'s hands went to hold his forearm to hopefully relieve some pressure.
At first nobody had noticed- nobody but Five Hargreeves.
"Stop!" Five shouted as (Y/N)'s captor moved the blad3 closer to his exposed throat.
Everything came to some sort of calm, even the dagger in Diego's hand came to a pause.
"Just, let him go," Luther slowly said, holding his hands out as if to calm the man.
Before he could even respond Five had disappeared, and so had Diego's knife.
Then (Y/N) was on the floor, panting on his hands and knees as he looked around. Five was standing above the dead man, Diego's dagger now bloody in his hand.
The chaos resumed as Five dropped the blade, falling to his knees next to (Y/N).
"Hold on," was all he said before pulling (Y/N) close and disappearing.
Gasping when they appeared in the alleyway next to the bank, (Y/N) was clutching Five's arm.
"Are you okay?" Five asked, looking (Y/N) over to ensure he was unharmed.
Shakily nodding, (Y/N) gulped and responded, "Y-Yeah. Yeah I'm fine. Just spooked, I guess."
"If you go out front the police are there, they'll help you get home." He pointed to the crowded street ahead of them.
"I live nearby, I can just walk home." (Y/N) shook his head, not wanting to bother the police if he didn't need to.
"They'll want your statement- What's your name?" Five suddenly asked, realizing the teenager in front of him was familiar.
"(Y/N) (L/N)."
It clicked where Five knew him from; he was a fellow regular at Griddy's Doughnuts.
"Well, (Y/N)..." he tested the name on his tongue, "They'll be wanting your statement."
(Y/N) seemed distressed by this news and Five rushed to fix it.
"But if you give me your address I can send them by later, since they're so busy."
Letting out a breath, (Y/N) nodded, listing off his address. He was worried that Five wouldn't remember the numbers and names but he nodded along like he would.
"Alright they'll be by later but I've really got to go-"
"Oh! Yeah, of course. Th-"
Before (Y/N) could finish thanking him he was gone.
...
Five really wasn't expecting to see the boy again, but the next day at Griddy's- there he was.
He was ordering a donut to go- probably to school. Five bet it was odd to try to go back to normal life after an event like that. For him, those events were his normal life.
Five cleared his throat, trying to gather his sudden bout of nerves.
"Hi, again...?" He was so nervous it sounded like a question.
(Y/N) turned his head and blinked, his face lighting up when he recognized Five.
"No need to thank me, and everyone's- mostly- fine." And awkward smile quirked his lips up.
"Tell that to my brother- speaking of which, I told him how you saved me and he wanted to thank you. You wanna come over to our house tonight? He's making cookies." It was almost like he was giving Five puppy dog eyes. (Because he was.)
And how could Five say no to those eyes?
End
---
Et Voila!
Sorry again for not doing all of it, but I hope this was good! Have a good day anon!
-Author Max <3
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moonyswoony · 3 months ago
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A stitch in the heart
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pairing: Diego hargreeves x reader
Summary: After Five’s betrayal you and Diego find unexpected comfort in each other.
Warning(s): making out, insults, humour
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Your fingers trace the edge of the old, worn-out armchair, a painful reminder of all the moments you thought you once shared with him. A hollow feeling settles in your chest, and you can’t decide what hurts more—the betrayal or the fact that you actually hadn’t seen it coming.
The doorbell rings sharply, startling you from your thoughts. You hesitate before opening it, your heart sinking as you see Diego standing there. He had come straight from the Umbrella Academy’s chaotic mess, having heard about the situation from Klaus, who had filled him in on the details. Diego’s dark eyes are filled with frustration and concern as he steps into the apartment.
“I didn’t know he was that stupid,” Diego says, his voice rough with a mix of irritation and empathy. His short brown hair is slightly tousled, and his mustache gives him a rugged, determined look.
You scoff, biting back the tears that threaten to spill. “Neither did I. But hey, at least I’m not the one who’ll be dodging flying knives for a while.”
Diego’s jaw clenches, the muscles working under his skin as he processes your pain. He had always been the protector, the one to throw himself into danger without a second thought, but this was different. He couldn’t punch Five without making things worse—without hurting you even more.
“He’s an idiot,” Diego mutters, stepping closer. His presence is like a comforting weight, a reminder that not everyone in this messed-up world would abandon you. “And if he wasn’t, I’d be happy to throw him off a building for you.”
You look up at him, trying to find solace in his words, but the wound was too fresh, too deep. “You’re way too good at the ‘throwing people off buildings’ thing, Diego. I’d hate to see what you could do if you really put your mind to it.”
Diego’s jaw twitches into a reluctant smile. “Trust me, I’ve got a lot of practice. But this isn’t about me or Five or Lila. This is about you.”
“You mean it’s not about making sure Five ends up face-first in the dirt?” you ask, a hint of sarcasm in your voice.
He shakes his head, his expression serious again. “Look, I know you’re hurting. And I’m not saying Five isn’t a jerk—he is. But you don’t deserve to be dragged down by his mistakes.”
A heavy silence sits between you, filled with unspoken words and the shared history that ties you both to the people who had hurt you. Diego has his own scars, the ones Lila had left on his heart. He knew betrayal, maybe as well as you did.
“Lila…” you began, but Diego cuts you off.
“She’s not worth it,” he says sharply, his tone brooking no argument. “And neither is he.”
His words are a balm, a gentle reminder that you aren’t alone in your pain. You take a deep breath, feeling the weight of the day begin to lift, if only slightly.
Diego’s hand finally finds its way to your shoulder, a tentative touch that sends a shiver down your spine. His fingers, rough but warm, rest gently on your skin. “You don’t have to go through this alone, you know.”
You look up at him, really look at him. The scars, the bruises, the lines of worry etched into his features—Diego had always been there, in the background, watching out for you even when you didn’t realize it.
“I’m sorry about Lila,” you whisper, not really sure why you’re apologizing. Maybe because it feels like you should, because your pain is linked to his in a way you hadn’t expected.
Diego shakes his head, his expression softening. “Don’t be. That chapter’s over. Has been for a long time.”
There’s something in his eyes, something that made your heart skip a beat. He’s not lying, he had moved on. But from the way he’s looking at you, you wonder if he had been waiting for you to realize you needed to move on too.
And maybe… maybe with him.
“Diego,” you breathe, the air between you crackling with a sudden tension, a shift that makes your heart race for an entirely different reason.
His fingers tighten on your shoulder, his gaze dropping to your lips for the briefest moment before returning to your eyes. “If you ever want to forget about him,” he says, voice low and intense, “I’m right here.”
The world seemed to narrow down to the space between you, the inches that felt like miles. Your breath hitched, your heart pounding in your chest. This was the Diego you knew so well—hotheaded, stubborn, fiercely loyal Diego. The man who had been by your side through thick and thin, who was willing to pick up the pieces of your heart when they fell apart.
You take a step closer, your hand coming up to rest on his chest, feeling the steady beat of his heart under your palm. His eyes darken, and he leans in, his breath warm against your skin. The tension between you is palpable, like the air before a storm.
Then, as if on cue, he closes the gap between you two.
The kiss is urgent, his lips surprisingly soft as snow.It all feels like a desperate attempt to make something beautiful out of the wreckage of the day.
The kiss deepens, growing more fervent as you both lose yourselves in the heat of the moment. Diego’s hands roam to your back, pulling you impossibly closer, his embrace enveloping you completely. His lips move with a new, careful intensity, exploring your mouth with a touch of tenderness and need.
After a few moments, Diego pulls back slightly, his forehead resting against yours. His eyes sparkle with a playful glint, and he gives a light-hearted chuckle. “You know,” he smirks “Before Lila came along and turned everything upside down, I actually had a crush on you.”
You look at him, surprised and amused. “Seriously? You had a crush on me?”
Diego nods, grinning. “Yep, and I guess I was so busy trying to play the tough guy that I didn’t realize honesty might’ve worked out better. But hey, Five and Lila didn’t exactly set the bar high, did they?”
You laugh, shaking your head. “True, true. It’s not like they made the most convincing case for keeping things simple.”
Diego chuckles, pulling you closer again. “Exactly. And honestly, if I’m better at anything, it’s being upfront about my feelings.”
You smile, feeling the warmth of his words and the comfort of his embrace. “I guess that’s something I can definitely appreciate.”
Diego leans in for another kiss, his lips brushing against yours with renewed fervor and for the first time in a while, the future feels like something worth fighting for.
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mattykay · 5 months ago
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Five Hargreeves x M/GNReader Headcanons
(that no one asked for but in honor of the trailer!)
We got both smut and the works in here so yk the drill
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~ General Hc ~
- Honestly, when Five meets you he's a little surprised. During the apocalypse he had Delores so he didn't really think to entertain any ideas of liking men, until you.
- He's honestly a pretty firm bisexual. He prefers to be dominant in his relationships and do the more care. He will melt into you the first time he lets you take care of him though.
- Very big on gifts and gentle words. He'll whisper compliments to you if his siblings are around, to save himself the teasing.
- Skin care freak. I'm strong on this. He takes really good care of not only his skin but his hair and his body. He spent forty five years all dirty in the apacolypse and will always make you wash your face. Morning and night.
- He has a hidden love for babies. He knows he can't have one because he'll be too old mentally when his body can have one but he likes taking care of them. He will say they're weird if asked though.
- Everything about Five is generally very pristine. His pajamas always match, his clothes are always nicely hung and ironed.
- On that topic, he does that for you too. Suddenly your closets full of nicely ironed and lint rolled clothes.
- A big time cat guy. He didn't really understand them for a while because they didn't have used like dogs. But when he finds one to love himself.. game over.
~ Smut ~
- For M readers: Honestly, he's a switch. He will say he's a top but once, a very rare once in a while, he will let you top. He's nervous about being penetrated but when he learns to relinquish control, he's down bad.
- He won't let you degrade him or call you daddy but he will let you fuck him nearly into another time line. He's the kind of guy to just start making those "Uh- Uh- Uh-" Sounds with every thrust. Cock or strap too, he doesn't care.
- Okay, back to more GN stuff: He will degrade you. No questions asked.
- He can fuck. It's the only way to say it, he just can. He can and he will. Fast and hard or slow and intimate. He'll go and go.
- He really does strive for your pleasure. Even when he claims that he's just fucking you to use you, you're his everything and he'll care for you hours after.
I hope you guys like this- could be totally self indulgent butttt it don't matter
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jweekgoji · 4 months ago
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Yandere!Five/Reader.
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wow how long has it been? two years since I wrote something for TUA? I still haven't rewatched it since I'm finally catching up with breaking bad but I hope I'll rewatch TUA next week or so. for some strange reason I feel that weird feeling like I need to come back to my fav fictional family with bread and milk and concentrate on it ughhh. when I rewatch it I will check that requests I had before for TUA and will finish them!
tw: yandere Five, unhealthy obsession, mentions of the reader's death, Five has ZERO moments of peace here, angst, controlling Five, mentions of Five's childhood, sort of happy ending?
I'm probably describing my thoughts sooo bad don't be mad please
Like we know, Reginald wasn't afraid to use his own «children» for every heroic mission. Bank robbery? He'll make a 14 year old kids deal with it. Some villains are trying to cause problems? Well, another time to test Number 1's leadership skills, no time for a happy childhood, kiddos! And that is basically what their life is.
Basically, the only source from which they can get the feeling of being needed, loved by the public, and recognized, if not by their father but by the citizens. Reginald trained them well, as long as there are 6 of them, they can deal with any kind of problem. I mean, come on, they're THE Hargreeves, one of the strongest people in the world who have unique superpowers, it's not like something might go wrong one day.
Five was always the most compatible member of the team, always trying to be the best. Despite only being the fifth in the ranking, it doesn't stop him from showing off every time he taunts another criminal, making them lose their minds in attempts to catch him.
It was another day when he and his siblings would find a criminal to deal with. Everything went smoothly, as Luther would discuss the plan with everyone. Klaus and Ben would be outside waiting for the signal, Allison and Luther would be the ones to distract the criminals from the hostages and Diego should disarm them before causing any serious trouble. Five would be the one who would save the hostages.
I think his abilities help the most in such situations. He can teleport any person away in just seconds and lead them into safety, no one would even notice. And if something happens, Five is capable enough to fight by himself.
You are the last hostage he protects now. He had already saved more than 10 people non-stop before, and for some reason, his powers refused to work. It's not like he is weak or something, no, no, just give him some time to catch his breath, and he will continue in a moment! He can't let someone see him like this, let alone let his father find out about this little problem.
He would huff and puff about it, probably imagining how Diego or Klaus were teasing him, how Five was losing his cool and accidentally forgetting how his own powers were working due to what a pretty little hostage Five talked to! And they're close to his age too, so it would be natural for his age to get shy and awkward in front of someone cute he found~! Well, at least it's exactly what he imagines hearing from Klaus after the mission.
Five wasn't quiet around people, usually. He enjoys talking with his siblings, well, with some of them—and he finds it amusing to toy with criminals.
For some reason, he is quiet around you.
Of course, he would try to reassure you that everything is fine, he is a good guy here, and soon enough, you would be safe. The only thing you have to do is just listen to him and follow his lead.
He didn't suspect everything, of course, and was so full of himself even at such an age, thinking nothing would go wrong. You were around his age, and naturally, despite being an arrogant little brat, he did find you quite cute. Maybe, if he had a different life, he would have approached you in different circumstances.
But Five learned the hard way that he's not the strongest and could never be the number one. He would never be able to save everyone. He just stopped paying attention for a one damn second, and the next thing he heard, was a gunshot. Five could feel your hand slipping away from his own, and he would look back just in time to see you almost stumbling, only to catch you in his own arms. Blood painted his dark blue uniform in red.
After that incident, Five became more obsessed with the idea of time travelling. If at first he wanted to prove to his father that he is capable of much more, to show that he's actually much better than everyone, this idea also feeds off his guilt. His first mistake, the only time he failed to do his task. And he just can't let go of it, no matter how much Viktor tries to tell him that it's really not his fault, that he couldn't predict it.
And then, during dinner, he runs away, despite Viktor silently begging him not to do it. Then he blinks again, again, and again, until it's nothing but ruins surrounding him. Until The Handler decides to pay him a visit, expect that he will probably be much more calculative and controlling. 40 years of being alone did it's horrible job on his mind, every day trying to survive while thinking about a possible way out of this situation. Maybe, if he makes much better calculations, he will actually succeed. But being away from humanity for so long makes him crave human contact, he already had that mannequin, Dolores, he could find, talking every day to her about how he actually missed his family, how he wants at least some kind of sick normalcy he had back in the academy. At least he had a place to live without worrying every day about his own survival.
During these moments, where he actually gives himself some time to be weak, he wonders would he still do this if you were still alive? Would he still risk everything just to make his father proud?
He didn't know much about you before. The police shortly said that day that one of the employees had a child in the building, and they were taken hostages by the villains. You were around his age, a young, probably promising student in your normal school, with caring parents and friends who worried about you. Something he craved deeply, even though he would have never admitted it.
When he couldn't have teleported you away safely, he led you through the second way out. He can tell you were scared. Of course, who wouldn't be? It's not like you were used to it. He isn't the gentlest person, more like focused on the business and how to end it all as fast as possible. But you were shaking mess, asking from time to time if it's safe or is actually everything okay? Five, in his some kind of nonchalant and gruff manner, would only nod, reassuring you that his siblings probably dealt with the villains by that time.
You looked so normal for him. You had no powers, no one made you train every day just to bend you into their high expectations, you didn't have to compete for someone's love and approval. You acted like he's just a normal person too, never bothering him with questions about his brothers or a sister, not trying to peek into some secret life of the Hargreeves family. Do you even know who he is?
Eventually, he can't remember who exactly started the dialogue. Was it you, who just wanted to talk about something so boring like your school life, or like that you probably skipped a few classes and missed a math test? Or was it him, remembering his trainings how he should try to make the worried and scared hostage less afraid by making a small talk with them? He's too old to remember every single detail. But he certainly remembered that he at least listened to what you said to him. That he was actually looking at you, giving you his full attention.
Maybe if he was born into a normal family, he would have had a chance to live that normal life with you. But that would be too kind to wish for, wasn't it? Now, that his hands are covered in blood of so many innocent people he had to kill, asking for a normal life is impossible. Even after taking hundreds of lives, he still can't understand why is the sight of yours in his hands any different? He thought he would be used to it by now. What kind of evil God makes him see it over and over again, in every goddamn timeline?
First, it was a villain killing you right in front of him. Second, it was the Swedes who killed you the next day they saw Five trying to talk to you. He almost lost his mind when he spotted you living near the same hotel where his siblings and he decided to stay. But once again, the more problems just followed, leading to another damn disaster to take you away.
When he lost his powers, he didn't know if he should feel relieved or more concerned about it. Of course, that means that he probably has to find Reginald, to get more answers about what the hell happened in this new universe. But that also meant that he finally has a chance to live like a normal person too. Like you did.
He was unfamiliar with this world. He felt lost, humiliated most of the time now that everyone treat him like he's actually younger than he is. At least people stopped treating him like a child, yet he still has to deal with someone underestimating him. He has to find a job, a place to live, for God's sake, how the hell is he going to live without any documents here?
The fate seemed to be connecting you two once again, as it seemed. You would meet him accidentally, one time you just saw him visiting a café you were working for and the same process would repeat again. This time, he would actually remember every single little detail. He would approach you first, carefully and as politely as he could. He still thinks that if he makes even the smallest mistake, he would experience your loss once again. This time he won't screw up, he would plan everything strictly to his scenario. Your meeting, your first date, your first 'I love you'. You might think he's just the most perfect guy you ever met, which actually... would not be so far from the truth? ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯
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kaybreezy3000 · 4 months ago
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Looking for Happy Five Hargreeves X FTM Reader -anon request)
~Explicit sexual content -if no likey-stay away please.
Hilariously simple but true summary: Five Hargreeves is sad and horny and wants to fuck, and all he wants is you.
(Don't worry, I will try to take you a little emotional rollercoaster that's not all the dirty-dirty 👍)
~Reader is post-top surgery and pre-bottom surgery.
~This story was done as an anon request, asking if I'd be willing to do a pairing of Five X m reader, or Five X ftm reader. The request left the plot open for me to decide if it had much of one or how deep I went with it. Anon did give me a few fun ideas to include if I could, and I did my best to deliver and had a lot of fun doing it, so I hope you enjoy. Thank you, anon. And special thanks to my buddy Bad Kitty @badkitty3000 for proof reading this and catching my zillions of mistakes.❤️
(18,900 words)
Content Warnings and additional tags: Dom Five and some Sub Five, small 'Scream' movie add in per anon's personal love of the movie with sexy Billy and Stu, light praise kink, daddy kink, rough sex, choking, spanking, public sex, Five being sweet, Five being a cocky jerk, masturbation mentions, flirting)
NOTE: This story takes place during season four and after it, using a series of flashbacks, so it moves between past and present several times. Also, this was obviously written before season 4 came out, with an alternate season 4 ending written my way. It has lots of season 4 trailer and interview mentions to make it more fun and hopefully tie in a little with the real season 4.
~~~~~Looking for Happy~~~~~
Coming out of one of the empty offices at the Temps Commission headquarters, Five is met with silence. He still holds the title to the main building of the time controlling agency that he founded, but now, he and his family are the only ones that know it ever existed. 
He has no reason to be there.
It’s as it should be, but like always, he can’t seem to move on.
As Five told The Handler, he is a man that no longer belongs anywhere, only when he said that, he didn’t realize he was the driving force behind so much of his own suffering, or that in the end, it would all come down to him.
Everything he’s done was to restore life as it should be, and finally, this time they won. They are all alive. He should be happy. They are back in their original timeline where they should have always been, but the concept of time and Five’s place in it have always felt like pieces of a puzzle that were never meant to be solved. 
For everyone but the Hargreeves, with their exceptional powers given at birth, it’s as if the final battle that brought on the end, and then opened the door for the new beginning never happened.
That means you don’t remember him.
The rest of the world didn’t need to remember the terror. You just needed to live.
Strolling along, hands in his pockets, eyes downcast as the heels of his dress shoes echo down the vacant halls, despite his wins, Five feels empty. All he wants is to go back to a time and place that’s no more, back to when he could feel your lips pressed to his with a desperation that matched his own.
Reaching the end of the hall, he enters the narrow room filled with screens and panels of little white and blue blinking lights. He sinks into one of the industrial style chairs that’s placed in front of the Infinite Switchboard’s main frame.
Five clicks on the outdated looking monitor, his fingers turning the knobs, dialing.
~~~
Not long later, Five’s face is glued to the screen when Klaus peaks in at him from the hall.
Knowing Five would be here, Klaus passes over the threshold, loudly clearing his throat before saying, “Hey there, big bro…watcha doing?”
Five doesn’t even look up. “Yeah, lucky me. Is it time for our weekly check-in already?”
Treading lightly, Klaus approaches. “When you missed dinner tonight, we were a little worried you’d fallen asleep on the countertop in the break room again, but here you are...”
Klaus lightheartedly laughs at his attempt to make a joke about Five’s odd sleeping habits, but Five continues to ignore him.
“Thank goodness we still have a few of these things hanging around, otherwise the rest of us wouldn’t be able to visit this lovely place,” he says as he lugs up one of Five’s time traveling briefcases, waving it in his face.
Five glares at him.
“Really, man,” Klaus continues. “Everyone was there tonight. It was all the usual banter you’d expect from such an amazing group of misfits, but it would have been so much better if you were there too. Things even got a little out of hand when Diego insisted on coming here to force you to eat what was left of their disgusting vegan goulash, but don’t worry, I put him in his place.”
“Sure, you did,” Five mumbles.
Taking a step closer Klaus asks, “How are you?”
“I’m fine.”
Klaus’s eyes follow his brother’s unbroken gaze to the monitor, just as you enter your apartment building, where you stop in front of the wall of mailboxes. Your hand comes up, bringing your key to your lock, but your eyes remain fixed on the mailbox above yours.
“That was your mailbox,” Klaus points out, like Five doesn’t already know that.
Five once stood right there by you in that entryway. He hadn’t thought anyone that wasn’t part of his family would ever have the balls to try to put him in his place, but you did, and by doing it, you opened a part of him that before that, he hadn’t been willing to let anyone touch.
After shoving your mail in the back pocket of your baggy jeans, just like the day you met, with your face obscured by your sweatshirt, you stomp up the stairs, your anger evident.
The screen hisses with static as Five adjusts your location until it shows you walking into your bedroom. 
“Why don’t you just go there and talk to him? Maybe jump him in the shower or something. Sounds like something you kinky boys would both enjoy,” Klaus unhelpfully suggests.
“He’s not in the shower, you dumbass,” Five says, letting out an irritated sigh afterwards.
“He might be in a few minutes…”
“No.”
“Hey man, I know it wasn’t supposed to happen, but he remembers you,” Klaus insists, spinning Five’s chair around.
Swinging around, Five almost falls out of his chair. “What the fu-!"
“Five, I know you’re only trying to do what you think is right, but just look at him, something is wrong!”
Five does look, just as you pick up the stack of papers and news clippings from your bedside table. He doesn’t need to zoom in to see the one you are holding. It’s a famous image of him in his academy uniform, mask and all, standing like the smug little jerk he was while posing in line next to the rest of the superpowered Hargreeves children.
“There is no other explanation for why he is looking up all this stuff about you, and there’s other reason why he keeps coming by my old place,” Klaus furthers, “Why won’t you let me go talk to him? We were friends. He might remember me too.”
“Leave him alone!” Five snaps, but his bark has no bite, and his eyes can no longer hide how painful this is seeing you this way.
“Everyone is worried about you. We just want to help,” Klaus pleads.
“You can’t help me with THIS!” Hands shaking, Five jumps up, his voice breaking just a little as he says, “Klaus... I can’t.”  He looks back over at the screen, right as you furiously toss a tiny collector figurine version of him across the room. “Just because I want to see something in this doesn’t mean it’s real,” Five whispers, looking anywhere but at his brother, or you.
“He maybe wasn’t supposed to remember, but I think he does. As we all know, there are a lot of things that make no sense in this world,” Klaus disagrees. “There is something going on with him. Can’t you see he’s falling apart?”
Jaw working anxiously, Five drops back down in front of his screens again, flipping them to what is clearly a random time and date, somewhere in the past with ladies in long billowing skirts and the men in fancy dress coats, escorting them down muddy streets filled with steaming piles of horse shit.
It’s over.
This is how it always goes.
Klaus remains silent as Five pulls out a notebook, pretending to be taking notes on whatever he is pretending to get out of watching things from the past when there is no longer a reason to monitor it for corrections. 
Klaus knows that Five isn’t going to budge, but before he leaves, he says, “Five, I know you are only trying to do what you think is best for him, but what if it’s not best. It’s not too late to fix this part of what was broken too.”
Five’s pen slows as he looks up at his brother standing over by the door. He nods, trying to smile but Klaus can see it’s so hard for him to do it. “I promise I’ll be there next time. Tell Lila that I am sorry.”
“Tell her yourself,” Klaus shoots back, followed by a small chuckle, “She’s pissed. She worked for hours cutting up all those fancy organic carrots for you, so don’t be surprised if the next time you drop by, she chops something off that you find equally important as wanting us all to eat sustainably. And by important, I mean your wiener,” he unnecessarily clarifies.
The hint of a real smile fights to come out and wins this time as Five says, “Lila hates to cook, so I know she did not help make me dinner, and if she was going to chop off my dick, she would have done it by now.”
Klaus smiles too and shrugs. “Maybe… She was pretty mad at you though, so I guess you’ll have to come over to their place to find out if you are still besties. And hey, maybe think about bringing my friend along with you next time. Everyone is dying to meet him and see that adorable smiling face of yours. It’s not like we all don’t know how you like being perpetually grumpy, but seriously…you’re so much prettier when you smile.”
While Five is telling Klaus to fuck off, hoping he finally talked some sense into him, Klaus quickly rounds the corner, hoisting up his briefcase, his fingers punching in the correct date to go back to the present.
As soon as Klaus is gone, Five’s smile fades. He turns the dial, bringing up the footage of you also back in current time, right as you’re screaming into your pillow. “What the fuck is wrong with me!”
His heart breaks a little more.
Nothing is wrong with you. He is the problem, that is why he never should have done what he did. 
He should have let you walk away, but he didn’t.
~~~
The invisible string, a connection that refuses to be ignored, tugs at your mind and it won’t stop.
You’re going crazy.  
Like the miniature resin version Five you just sent flying, the pillow on your face joins it on the floor.
It makes no sense, but you can still feel the tickle of Five’s breath against your neck as you cuddled together on your couch, him contentedly holding you like he never wanted to let you go.
Your eyes remain focused on your motionless ceiling fan, but your brain refuses to come back to the present.
The pain inside your chest tightens.
You try to push it away, but it only gets worse the more you try to tell yourself to stop this.
This is insanity. You need help. That’s what people would say if you told them about the things going on inside your head.
From anything you can gather, Five’s family seem like they aren’t concerned about anything at all, but not that long ago you remember them being shown on every news channel, doing unimaginable things while defending themselves from the barrage of artillery being shot at them.
Five left you only hours before that, promising to be back, but he never came back.
Long after he said he’d be home, you watched in shock as the news blasted stories about him and other people associated with him that made no sense. They said they were aliens! They said they were superheroes from another dimension! They flashed images of Five’s much younger face alongside the other people he grew up with, including Klaus.
Then a war started in the streets.
Almost immediately, the news reporters had given up trying to maintain their façade of calm. The holiday lights beyond their lens twinkled eerily as the sound of explosions filled the air and rocked the ground.
People screamed and sirens blared, and not just on the TV. You could hear it coming from outside your windows.
As the collapsed news camera continued to stream live feed, out of nowhere, Five appeared in the frame, enveloped for a fraction of a second in a flash of violet hued light.
Your jaw nearly hit the floor. It couldn’t be real.
Five’s long coat tails flung like wings behind him as he grabbed ahold of the terrified girl whose picture you’d seen on the birthday invite Klaus had shown you. Five and the girl disappeared in another burst of light, just as bullets ripped through the metal garbage can she was hiding behind.
You smelled the smoke in the air when you ran outside. The earth shook, rattling your teeth as the echo of gunfire sent chills up your spine.
It all happened, only it didn’t. Nobody else remembers it.
Now, the Umbrella Academy is a thing of the past. The superpowered children that had once lived there are common knowledge, but they supposedly moved on with their lives long ago.
Klaus’s apartment isn’t his anymore, and the doors at the Umbrella Academy never open when you ring the bell.
The world in which you met is gone and the Five you knew is gone with it.
Five Hargreeves disappeared at the age of 13, never to be seen or heard from again.
Was any of it even real?
Again, you’re back to questioning your sanity.
“Fuck,” you curse, while raking your hand through your hair.
It’s been months. Three months and twenty-seven days to be exact since you first talked to Five, only then, you didn’t know that was his real name and not just a quirky nickname he preferred to go by.
He always had a nervous energy about him, and he always seemed distracted, so you usually paid no attention to him, but that day, something about the way he refused to acknowledge your presence set you off.
After he rudely stepped on your foot and pushed into you with his shoulder while reaching for his mailbox, you slammed your metal mailbox door closed, doing it much louder than needed.
You smiled with satisfaction when Five startled, even jumping a little.
He looked over at you with cartoon sized wide eyes.
Shaking your head, you’d said, “Not sure if you noticed, but you are not the only one trying to occupy this space. I exist too.”
Five’s eyes narrowed, the intensity of his glare slowly moving up and down as he took in your loose t-shirt and baggy jeans, comfortably paired with your favorite beat up low top sneakers.
You were sure the assessment he was making of you was not a good one. Especially when you consider that he was dressed impeccably as he always was, a long wool coat over a three-piece suit, with his hair a mess of chocolate brown strands, that though all over the place, only made him look even more unfairly attractive.
Compared to him, even though you stood over him by an inch or more, you suddenly felt like a tiny bug on the floor about to be obliterated under one of his shiny dress shoes. Your bodies outwardly didn’t look that much different, but you could tell that you were a little scrawny even when compared to his relative scrawniness. On top of that, he appeared to be close to the same age as you, but it was as if you were opposites, living in the same shitty apartment building, but he was somehow better than you.
You quickly concluded that he was a totally dickhead. Thinking about his stupid big black shoes, and then dicks as they related to shoe size, your mind started moving to certain ways that you were pretty sure you were different from him other than the fact that you weren’t an asshole.
You started to turn away, but before you did, you bitterly added, “I live here, by-the-way. We pass by each other almost daily. Not sure if you are aware of that?”
Ingrained manners getting the best of you, you extended a hand. Five looked at it like a foreign object.
He said nothing, so getting really mad, you casually as possible hooked a thumb under your waistline, while defiantly cocking your chin at him. “An I am sorry, or an excuse me, are just two options you could use to apologize when you just rudely rammed into someone, but it looks like you’re not going to do that since you lack even the most basic kindergarten level social skills.”
You tucked your mail in your back pocket and his eyes immediately moved down to your waist, openly checking out your striped boxers that were starting to show thanks to your pants sagging. Even more annoyed by this less than pleasant interaction, you started to walk away, quietly breathing out the word ‘jerk’ as you headed back towards the stairs.
“Wait!” he called out.
Surprised, you turned back to see the corner of Five’s mouth ticked up, the small movement hardly even noticeable if you hadn’t been suddenly hyper focused on the softness of his slightly parted lips.
“You aren’t wrong. Social graces aren’t where I excel,” he started. “I get lost inside my own head sometimes. I am sorry. Will you accept my apology, or is there something else I can do to make up for being so impolite? Wouldn’t want the neighbor boy thinking I’m a jerk.” 
He extended his hand. 
“You can call me Five, by-the-way.”
Fuck. He heard you, and what the hell, was he trying to be condescending? And Five? 
What the hell kind of name is that?
You looked back over at the name on his mailbox, it wasn’t Five.
“Five is a family nickname,” he explained. The dimple in Five’s cheek grew deeper the longer you dumbfoundedly stared at him. He lifted a brow. “I may be a lot of things, but deep down, I swear I’m a gentleman. I really am sorry for violating your personal space, but I am not that sorry about it because it meant we got to do this.”
What was with this guy?
Rarely did guys his age act so…
Shit… Was he hitting on you?
Five’s smile was like a superpower all its own and it was rendering you speechless, making you temporarily unable to maintain the level of irritation you’d had before. Feeling your face getting hotter, you couldn’t figure out why his words or his expression looked and sounded so flirty, but they did.
Maybe he was just trying to be nice?
Trying to play it cool, you threw a hand back through your slightly less shaggy looking haircut, then replied, “Sure… Nice to meet you and the apology is good enough. Very big of you. Thanks.”
Five’s taunting smile remained, as if you shooting him down was exactly what he wanted.
“Oh,” he breathed, digging through his stack of mail before pulling out an envelope, “I believe this is yours?” He frowned as he looked down at the feminine sounding name and your apartment number that was printed under the clear cellophane address window. “Your roommate, or girlfriend’s, I’m assuming?”
You took the mail from him. “No. No roommate and no girlfriend, just me.”
You were sure that Five looked relieved to hear that, and your breath caught, and your heart kicked up accordingly.
Adding the envelope to your back pocket, you breathed in, then slowly let it out as you rocked back on your heels. “That’s…my dead name,” you clarified.
Five said nothing. He seemed confused as his eyes wandered from yours and he rubbed his chin, but then his eyes suddenly came up, meeting yours again just as it seemed a lightbulb went off inside his brain.
His handsome smile took your breath away as he said, “I never would have guessed, but then again, there is a slightly unhinged, 64-year-old man hiding inside my head, and I am sure you never would have guessed that either.”
You laughed. You never would have guessed he’d be so funny or cute, but he was full of all sorts of surprises.
“You know, nobody reads the news that way anymore, other than grumpy old men, but I guess that makes sense since you’re a retiree,” you teased, trying to keep this whatever it was going by fucking with him again.
Unfazed by you making fun of him, Five nodded. “True,” he agreed, “When it comes to reading real newspapers and my other geriatric ways, I don’t mind getting my hands dirty from time to time on these ink smudged pages,” he waved his paper at you, “-or in other more challenging ways that are much more enjoyable. With the lifetime of experience I have under my belt, I’m sure I could teach you a lesson or two on how to have a good time the old-fashioned way.”
Taking his rolled newspaper, Five slapped it into his opposite hand, making a spanking gesture, all the while never taking his eyes off you.
You rubbed your palms down the front of your jeans. “Wha-what kind of fun?” you stammered, your brain clicking off as blood rushed between your legs.
“The crossword puzzle,” he clarified, followed by a cocky little chuckle. “There’s much more to the newspaper than doom and gloom news stories. It’s all about the delayed gratification. Seeing all those empty squares filled in the only words that can solve the puzzle is a sight well worth the effort.”
“You’re talking about doing crossword puzzles from the newspaper?”
“What else would I be talking about?” he countered.
Holy shit, you wanted to deck him.
~~~
A few days went by, and you didn’t run into your charmingly arrogant neighbor again, not until you were coming home late and you walked into a neighborhood pub to grab some dinner. You looked over, and to your surprise, you saw the familiar profile of a dark-haired asshole sitting alone at the bar.
“You can’t be twenty-one,” you said, sliding in next to him.
Five’s lips pulled to the side as he gave you the most mischievous looking side eye you’d ever seen. “So, you’re stalking me now? If my coworkers at the CIA knew how easily you tracked me down, I’d be fired.”
You scoffed, “You wish,” meaning both to the stalking and him working for the CIA.
Smirking fully, as if acknowledging he did wish you were stalking him, Five self-assuredly tipped his glass your way before sending the rest of the amber colored liquid down his throat.
With his head tipped back, tie pulled loose, and the top two buttons of his dress shirt undone, try as you might, you couldn’t stop looking at the way his Adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed.
“Really. How old are you?” you pushed, trying not to drool.
Five let out a cocky sounding laugh, his eyes a mossy calm as his gaze flicked down and up, drinking you in like he was a lion, sizing up its prey. “19 going on 64, give or take. Doesn’t matter because here, the drinks are strong, and the bartenders don’t care.”
“Right…” Shaking your head at him as you smiled, you flagged down a server.
Knowing what you wanted already, you ordered, but when you asked for it to-go, Five unexpectedly interrupted. “Make that for here, and for two, and put it on my tab, please.”
The bartender looked at you and you nodded that it was okay.
When you were alone again and Five realized you were still looking at him like he was nuts, he calmly said, “What? I thought we were friends now, and I owe you, remember?”
“I suppose that talking smack to each other for five minutes, one time, means we’re friends,” you pointed out, before adding, “And as long as you don’t try to plow into me again, you don’t owe me shit.”
Five shifted his weight, leaning closer, so only you could hear him since the seats on both sides of you had just been taken. “As a man that hasn’t come close to mastering traveling through time, both forwards or backwards, and can no longer do either anymore anyway, I can’t promise anything with it comes to my spatial awareness issues, but that’s a whole different problem of mine among the many. When it comes to sticking my landings and running into you accidentally or not, I tend to think you like the idea of me plowing into you again.”
Your mouth opened and closed a few times, like you were a brainless fish, nothing coming out, because what the hell do you say to that!
Five burst out laughing. “You are so easy to fuck with.”
“And you are a dick,” you duly noted.
“A dick that you’re apparently not opposed to eating dinner with, and hey, I’ll even buy you a drink too, but only if you’re a good boy and keep looking at me with that handsome little smirk of yours.”
Jesus… Did he just say that?
He did, and his patronizingly suggestive comments weren’t the only thing getting you worked up. You could smell the heady scent of his cologne every time you had to move closer to him to let someone else get up to the bar, and damn did he smell good.
“Confident much?” you cocked off.
Five shrugged. “Yes,” he said, matter of fact. “But the truth is, most of the time I am not great with people. I’ve spent most of my life alone, and I have only ever been with one other person intimately, and that relationship wasn’t what anyone would call normal, and abstaining from any sexual relationship since then is definitely not my penis’s first choice, it's more of an existential problem.”
“Oh, my God!” You burst out laughing.
Your second conversation with Five was starting no less shocking and confusing than the first, and like the time before, you were loving it.
For the next few hours, you sat there with him, getting to know each other, having several more drinks that went down with plenty of laughs and hardly concealed innuendoes that proved over and over that what was going on between you was much more than just friendly chatter.
With his dark strands of hair dangling in his eyes and his perfectly tailored three-piece suit, Five looked hot as hell, and because of that, he was getting checked out constantly the entire time, but he never seemed to notice, and that was because his eyes were always on you.
You didn’t even think about leaving until the band that had been setting up since you got there started to play, and it got way too loud to hold a conversation. As you offered to pay again, Five refused. Then, having already had his foot resting on the rung of your barstool, he abruptly spun you around to face him more directly, giving you an innocent looking smile as he let the tip of his shoe glide up your ankle.
“I’m not ready to let you go yet,” he said, his voice low.
“You’re not?” you sputtered, trying not to spray the liquid you’d just tried to swallow all over him.
“This has been nice,” he said, velvety soft as he moved closer “Thank you for keeping me company.”
“That’s not all I want to do,” you found yourself saying back, your lips brushing his cheek as your hand lowered to his knee, your palm running along the smooth wool fabric, stopping mid-thigh.
Five’s leg tensed. For the first time since you got there, he was tongue tied.
He suddenly moved back, and you instantly removed your hand. You were sure you’d just freaked him out, but then he quickly said, “Maybe we should move?”
Not a second later, you were both making your way through the mob of people, all the way to the edge of the dance floor in front of the stage.
Five seemed so at ease in the crowd, even having fun listening to the live music. He was not at all who you thought he was, and just looking at him next to you made it feel like you had a swarm of butterflies fluttering around in your stomach.
With eyes glossed over, standing as close as you were, the music wasn’t the only thing Five seemed to be enjoying. Taking full advantage of there being no room to move, every now and then, his hand would brush against the side of your thigh, staying there a little longer than necessary. Then, after both of you were getting repeatedly shoved around in the crowd of inebriated people, Five strategically placed himself behind you, as he was trying to protect you.
With him standing behind you, your body got even warmer, and you smiled to yourself, remembering how Five had claimed to be such a gentleman. Whether he did it to be gentlemanly or not, Five seemed all too happy to have a reason to press up against your backside, because now he had an even better reason to place his face next to yours, humming in your ear as he said absurd things to make you laugh.
You weren’t so much dancing together as the people around you were trying to do, but that didn’t mean Five wasn’t intentionally or unintentionally moving himself against you to the rhythm of the music. Trying to figure out which one it was, you reached back taking him his belt, tugging him flush as you dropped your head back and arched your back into him.
Five let out a pained sounding whimper as his hard-on poked the back of your leg and almost just as fast, the tip of his nose brushed your neck as the warmth of his breath caressed your skin. “I’m sorry, but fuck, you’re making me hard,” he whispered before you felt his lips gently kiss your already tingling skin.
He had no reason to be sorry.
Turning around, you slipped your hand around his, assertively leading him through the crowd. You weren’t even off the main floor, a few feet down a side hall near the bathrooms, when Five was on you, taking your face in his hands, pulling you into a kiss. He was so excited, his lips actually trembled as they pressed against yours, a low moan coming from deep inside his chest when you eagerly reciprocated.
It had to be a whole minute later before he let you up for air, gazing at you with darkened eyes as he smiled. "I really like you.”
Sliding your other hand around his neck, you grabbed at the soft tangle of hair brushing the crisp edge of his shirt collar, tugging it sharply. "You’re going to like me even more in a second,” you shot back, while moving your other hand lower.
Five let out the cutest sound as you started fondling him while also giving his mane another tug, but it must not have been all that upsetting that you were manhandling him because as you tightened your grip in his hair, his hips reactively bucked into yours.
Five’s hard cock pressed up against the crotch of your jeans as he ground himself against you, his hands hungrily groping your ass, pulling you back and forth over his dick.
"Fffiv-vvve," you panted into his frantic kiss.
He smiled against your lips and kept on kissing.
You trailed a hand up his inner thigh, cupping his erection through his clothing as your mouths parted wider. The heat of his tongue entered you, engaging you in a sloppy kiss that ended with biting and tugging at your bottom lip before he said, “You have no idea how bad I wanted this.”
Five let out a shaky sigh as he glanced over at the man carrying several cases of liquor, trudging by, heading towards one of the bars' storage rooms.
You were a little taken aback by how vulnerable he looked, his face flushed, and his lips wet and full from kissing you. You stayed silent for a few seconds, just looking at him.
You weren’t sure if he was going to stop. Something seemed off, only you couldn’t put your finger on it. Not that you were trying that hard. Your fingers were still busy doing something else.
Before you got too worried that he’d changed his mind, Five started kissing again, your oversized sweatshirt hood falling over your heads.
Going at it hard, with his hands latched on your ass, Five dry humped you into the wall, not even stopping when the door across from you flung open. Coming to your senses only slightly, you shoved Five backwards, forcing him into the men’s room.
Your adrenaline was pumping hard, and your heart was racing as the door closed behind you.
Five came at you again. Your hands went around him as he grabbed a handful of your ass, nearly lifting you off the floor. He pinned you to the wall again, his cock slamming between your legs.
His hands ran down your sides, fingers digging in hard enough to bruise as he kissed and sucked your collarbone, trailing teeth and kisses gently up your neck.
Breathing heavily as you momentarily broke apart, Five anxiously said, “You need to tell me to stop if this is too much, okay?”
You didn’t reply verbally, instead you kept kissing him. Five groaned into the kiss and pushed your crotches together with more determination.
Miraculously for as busy as the bar was, the bathroom was empty, but it wouldn’t be for long. Not even breaking apart, you walked Five backwards again, moving him inside the largest bathroom stall. Thankfully it didn’t appear that dirty, but again, you weren’t really looking.
You kicked the door closed, hand only leaving Five long enough to twist the lock. Lips coming off your neck, Five’s eyes trailed up and down your taller frame. He reached out as you cornered him, brushing some of your hair away from your ear while his other hand snuck between your legs and squeezed your crotch. Looking pleased with himself and what he was feeling, he tilted his head to kiss your neck while he rubbed his hand over your clothed sex repeatedly.
In return, you moved your hand over his dick again, unzipping and then tugging his pants down. His cock sprung forward with no underwear to prevent it from happening.
Naturally you both looked down, and wow did Five look proud as your eyes went wide.
“Impressed?” he asked.
“Hardly.”
He was clearly not buying that lie because fuck…
With no further ado, you lowered to your knees, and he watched you do it as if transfixed. Your hand wrapped around his ankle, then trailed up a bit further, before you stopped under his knee, rubbing lightly.
Five reactively opened his legs a little, and so did you in a futile effort to ease the slight feeling of friction you were experiencing against your briefs.  
You were buzzed and horny, and this was nuts, but fuck it. This was happening!
Five’s cock was already leaking. You licked your lips and positioned yourself. With the hand not already holding him, you reached out and gave his long cock a tentative pump, spreading the precum around with your thumb. He pulled back a little.
“You okay, big shot?” you teased.
A smile crept onto Five’s face, but his voice came out so broken it caught you off guard. “You don’t have to do this.”
Okay… Maybe he was nervous, that was fair, especially if all his arrogance was just a show and what he said about being inexperienced was true, but considering how he had just been all over you, and now you were on your knees in a bathroom stall with his dick in your face, you looked up at him in disbelief as you said, “I know I don’t have to do this. I want to. Now stop being so damn frustrating and let me suck your dick!”
It was as if something in him snapped, the darkness in Five’s eyes smoldered as he purred, "Just remember, pretty boy, you asked for it. I am going to fuck your face so hard you’ll think twice before smarting off to daddy again.”
Holy fuck that was fucked but it only made you wetter.
Just then, someone walked in, going straight to the urinals. Your heads both flung that way. If they looked behind them, they for sure would see Five’s shoes lined up against your knees. There was no question what was happening, and even more turned on by that, you started stroking Five gently as you could while playfully sticking out your tongue to lick up the glistening fluid running down his shaft.
Falling back against the partition between the stalls, Five’s head made a hilariously loud thunking sound.
You kept at it, kissing the slit of his rounded tip, working it in a circular pattern. Five let out the quietest hum of approval as his fingers at his sides clenched and unclenched repeatedly.
You kept toying with him, enjoying how he was struggling to stay quiet, but only until the door closed and you were alone again, then he brought his hand to your cheek.
You looked up as his hand moved into your hair. “You look so good with your mouth on my cock.”
To that, the throbbing between your legs had you tensing your thighs to increase the sensation but it wasn’t enough and you let out a moan of complaint over it that made the darkness in Five’s eyes look all the more wicked with delight.
You put his whole tip in your mouth, opening and closing your kiss reddened lips around it, grazing it just barely with your teeth. From above, Five let out a moan as his hand in your hair moved, brushing your fringe of hair out of your face.
He couldn’t take his eyes off you and God did you love it.
He was letting out breathy sighs and grunts as you serviced them, his free hand pushing back through his hair the more agitated he got.
Wanting to send him over the edge, with the hand you were holding him with, slowly pumping him at just the tip, you leaned in even more, letting the musky scent of him fill your senses as your tongue ran along his balls. You were rewarded for that with a deep groan and an unsteady hand coming to the top of your shoulder.
That was all the praise you needed.
“Fuck yeah,” Five hissed, then he bit down on his lower lip, as you took him in your mouth, moving over him just little deeper and faster.
Almost right away, Five started rocking his hips in strained, shallow nudges. Each time he entered you and hit the back of your throat, he’d break apart a little more, and you swore you’d never seen anything so beautiful in your life.
Petting you, and making your hair all sorts of fucked up, Five encouragingly murmured “You are so fucking good at this. Fuck- Ohh-ffffff-you’re amazing,” he gasped.
Even though it was happening, you could hardly believe you were seeing this normally composed man turning into such a stuttering, red-faced mess.
Tipping your head back and opening your throat to him, the thick head of Five’s cock moved inside with ease, fucking you deep and hard enough in quick but controlled thrusts that it took away your ability to breathe.
Your eyes instantly began to water.
“Fu-ck-ye-ah-take-my-dick,” Five stammered as he wildly fucked into you.
The door opened again, the music getting louder for a moment before it shut again. This time there were several guys in there, but between the sound of them pissing, and their talking, and the thrum of the bass coming from outside, it still wasn’t enough to hide Five’s sharply cut off breaths and curses.
They knew, but the way Five’s eyes kept drooping closed proved his brain was no longer running the show and he didn’t care.
His fingers gripped tighter, yanking at your hair. You took the abuse, gagging on him until Five suddenly clasped his hands on the sides of your face, stopping you. “I’m gonna-cum,” he quietly cried.
He had a panicked look in his eyes. His teeth were clenched, and it was clear he was trying so hard not to orgasm, but it was coming one way or another, even with the guys outside your stall snickering and making lewd comments.
“Fuck yeah you are, and you’re going to do it my mouth,” you commanded, right before sucking him raw again, taking him all the way to the hilt.
Losing all self control, Five started railing your face again.
You couldn’t breathe at all, and were choking on your own spit. Your fingers dug into his thighs as your body instinctively fought back, but Five held the back of your head tight, forcing you down on him over and over.
Then, while violently scrambling your brains with his throbbing cock, hot spurts of Five’s seed started shooting down your throat. His hips jerked uncontrollably as he dug his heels into the floor. He fell back against the wall again. The waves of his shuddering release came out in a cadence of grunted curses as he moved himself in and out of your gaping mouth, moving slower and slower with each thrust until he was spent.
Having dumped his load, he started to slide out. Getting oxygen again, your blurred eyes took in the sight above you as you gave his well worked shaft a few more loving licks and twirls of your tongue. Sure that you just blew his mind, you popped your mouth off and smirked.
Five’s doe eyes were only slightly open and the dreamy way he was looking down at you was priceless.
~~~
Five was temporarily out of commission but you were both still horny as fuck as you burst out in the cool night air onto the sidewalk. Both riding the high, you fully intended to take your fun back to one of your apartments. As worked up as you were, coming out of that bathroom, hand-in-hand, quickly cutting through the crowded bar, your discussion hadn’t gone much past both of you smiling like idiots, but you knew the night wasn’t over, that was until you saw Klaus.
“Five?” he questioned, sounding totally shocked to see him as he approached from the opposite direction with his colorful meditation robe bundled around him.
Five slowed to a stop, back peddling a little. You looked from him to your friend, as his hand slipped from yours.
“Hey there, little brother,” Klaus said, “Would have never thought I’d see you out this late. What’s this?” He pointed at you with one of his latex covered gloves, the motion exposing his usual weird bubble wrap inner padding system that he liked to keep secured around him, so as he put it, he didn’t die while accidentally getting run over. “I didn’t know you guys knew each other,” Klaus added as he waved the hand holding his Styrofoam cup between the two of you.
It was subtle, but Five moved away from you a little more as he stuffed his hands in his pockets, trying even harder to hide that he’d been touching you.
Looking very uncomfortable, Five cleared his throat. “Well, Klaus, what with the nature of my employment, I am known to leave my apartment from time to time, and it’s not like I see you that often, so you wouldn’t know that. I also wasn’t aware that I needed to keep you updated with who my acquaintances are.”
Five looked at you for the briefest of moments, no indication of the sweet guy he had been in his now hardened eyes.
“We live in the same building,” Five irritatedly furthered, as he looked at Klaus again. “Happened to run into each other a bit ago while picking up dinner, so yeah… That’s it.”
“You guys going anywhere else fun? I’d love to join you, catch-up on life before the big family reunion b-day party next weekend.” Klaus held up his drink again. “This tea is amazing. I got it at a place about a block down. I’ll buy you guys one,” he pushed as you silently tried not to let it show how confused you were.
You’d met Klaus over a year before while at a park. He was there alone, sitting under a shady tree, legs crossed, eyes closed while positioned in namaste, when one of your friends threw a frisbee that glided over and clocked him in the side of the head, which was the only part of him not covered with protection from germs or flying projectiles.
Running over to apologize, from that point on, you’d been friends with the slightly odd, but always interesting spiritualist. The fact that Klaus was Five’s older brother, one of the other six orphans he’d told you he’d grown up with, was as crazy and unsettling as the way Five was acting all of a sudden.
As if you weren’t already feeling like shit, then Five said, “No thanks. I’ll have to pass on the tea. I have work to do at the office. I’ll see you around.”
“You still doing cool secret government stuff?” Klaus questioned, but Five didn’t answer him, or specify if he meant he’d see you around, or just his brother, then he strode off, his breath a plume of white in the night air as he quickly rounded the corner like he couldn’t get away quick enough.
~~~
The work week came and went, and you didn’t run into Five again, but that didn’t mean you hadn’t thought about him about a million times.
Of course, you asked Klaus about him, and he asked you about you and Five. Klaus said that his brother was super secretive. He said that he thought Five worked for the government in some capacity, but really, he wasn’t sure, but you were pretty sure that was a lie.
Klaus said Five was a loner and that he didn’t get out socially that much, so he was floored when he saw him laughing and smiling, walking down the street with you, and that part you figured was true.
When Klaus pressed you about Five, you could tell that he knew you were lying when you went along with Five’s story, by not giving him anything new, other than you’d eaten dinner with him since you both happened to be sitting at the same bar.
You said you were being neighborly. That was it.
You both weren’t telling the whole truth, and you both knew it.
As much as you wanted to tell someone how mad you were about what Five had done, it sure as hell wasn’t going to be his older brother. The way Five played you was dirty, but you weren’t the type to start shit.
Five was a prick. End of story.
You didn’t know if he was ashamed of people knowing about him being with you, or it was just his family knowing about it, or if he just used you to get off and that’s all it ever was.
It didn’t matter.
You felt so stupid because you had felt like you had something real with him, something that was maybe a bit too much based on an intense sexual attraction and a shared craving to one up the other with cocky remarks and flirty jokes, but there was also something else. When you were with Five, it felt like you were all that he could see. And even more important, he saw you how you wanted to be seen.
You wanted to get lost in him and the feeling seemed to be mutual, but you were wrong.
What Five did hurt. There was no other way to put it.
When you came and went from your place, a part of you wanted to run into him, and another part of you never wanted to see him again. Some days when you couldn’t stop thinking about that asshole’s smile and those dark lashes of his fanning his pale cheeks, you contemplated going up a floor to kick his door in, to either jump his bones or kick him in the nuts, maybe both.
You didn’t.
It had been a long day, and the last thing you wanted was to go out. You were planning on having over a group of guys to watch a horror movie marathon. It was going to be a mixed group, old friends and Klaus.
Klaus always seemed lonely, too obsessed with keeping himself from getting sick or avoiding quicker, more gruesome forms of death, so you weren’t about to leave him out. He needed to get outside of his head and so did you. Klaus was someone that needed a friend and you were happy to bring him into your fold, even if he often remained quiet, or nervously excitable. He could be so hot and cold, and so detached, and something about that reminded you of Five.
They were brothers, so…
No. 
No, you were not going there.
Fuck Five.
You dropped some bags of chips and other junk food on the table in front of the couch, busying yourself with getting things ready for your guests, rather than wasting your time thinking about Five.
Life goes on, your friends showed up and as usual, Klaus was late, but when he knocked on your door with his brother in tow, you naturally did a double take because you were so floored.  
“Mind if I join you?” Five sheepishly asked while handing you a bottle of very expensive looking Scotch, the same brand he kept buying you at the bar.
There you were, wearing your favorite sweats and frumpy faded t-shirt, and there he was, looking amazing as always in his slim fit white dress shirt and usual black slacks, but gone was the self-assured guy who strutted into your life and then stomped on your dick.
He looked so nervous and unlike himself that all you could bring yourself to do was take the bottle as you nodded your head, stepping aside to let them in.
Klaus came waltzing in, minus his usual bubble wrap bumper vest, which you assumed he left at Five’s apartment before coming down to yours. He instantly took his place on your recliner since you’d abandoned it.
“Since, my dearest little brother lives in your building and you two are friends, I figured I’d stop by and see if he wanted to join us,” he explained, clearly aware that you weren’t thrilled. “With how chummy you two looked the other night, I was surprised that you hadn’t already plucked Five out of his boring man cave,” he added while wagging his eyebrows at you.
“Funny, when inviting my friends over, thinking anything about Five and our chumminess totally slipped my mind,” you muttered, as you glared at the jerk you did not want there who was still expectantly staring at you.
The asshole was standing there on your door mat, looking about as clueless as ever, so you waved him on. “Don’t just stand there. Come on in. Join the party. We’re about thirty minutes into the first ‘Scream’ movie.”
“Are you sure this is, okay?” Five quietly asked, clearly not wanting anyone else to hear as you shut the door behind him.
“Why wouldn’t it be,” you shot back, the anger in your voice impossible to hide.
“It’s not what you think. I am sorry,” he tried.
“Whatever,” you snapped. “Hey, Klaus!” He looked up with his mouth full of popcorn. “Introduce your brother, please.”
After dismissing him, with no other choice Five walked out to meet your friends.
Entering your kitchen, you got down some tumblers to pour everyone a glass of Five’s ‘you sucked my dick and then I rejected you,’ peace offering or whatever the fuck it was supposed to be.
“Gentleman, my ass,” you breathed before coming out to the living room with your hands full of the sloshing liquid.
Of course, there was nowhere to sit but next to him on your L-shaped couch. Five was at the hooked end, doing his best to look somewhat comfortable.
Like before they came, mostly everyone ignored the addition to the party as they zoned out, watching the movie, making comments here and there. As it was before, everyone was just chilling, lounged out on your furniture. Deputy Duey was being a dipshit that you couldn’t help but love, and terrified girls with big tits, and stupid horny guys ran for their life, screaming as the ghost-faced killer sliced and diced them.
It would have been great, exactly what you needed, but Five’s presence was making it anything but relaxing for you. He was so close; you could feel the heat of his leg next to yours as the silent tension between you grew. The way he was bouncing his knee made it clear he wasn’t feeling very comfortable either, but fuck him.
Nearing the end, when the masks came off, Five’s agitation had gotten noticeably worse. He could hardly hold still. You could tell he wasn’t okay. His hand laying against his leg was shaking. Not even thinking, you reached over, placing yours over it.
His breath hitched as he looked at you. “Excuse me,” he whispered, abruptly pushing himself up off the couch.
As he passed, Klaus gave his brother a worried glance, but you told him to stay put as you got up to follow Five.
Coming around the partition dividing your small living space, you saw that Five had himself leaned back against your kitchen counter, head down, pinching his forehead between two fingers.
“Not enjoying the movie?” you sarcastically asked.
Five pulled in a long breath AS he looked up at you. “I am afraid that as an ex-assassin, there is something about these tragically misguided young men happily stalking their prey before slicing them apart with blunt objects that hits a little too close to home.”
You blinked rapidly. “You’re kidding?”
His lip quirked up. “Not entirely.”
“Ah-huh,” you breathed before taking a long pull of your drink while glancing around the corner at the TV in the other room.
“At least part of the motivation for these two bonehead murderers being their secret love affair made this otherwise less than thrilling teen slasher film less boring,” Five furthered, seemingly a little less upset, almost playful as he smiled a little more when you looked at him again.
“What! NO! I love this movie,” you argued, forgetting that you hated him, even playing up how offended you were by his comment over your favorite scary movie. “And hell yes, them being mad as fuck for each other makes this better,” you agreed, followed by a laugh.
Five’s smile fell. “I wish I hadn’t done what I did the other night.”
“Then why did you?”
He ran his hand back, pushing his hair out his eyes, but it fell right back. “Because, when it comes to my family, it’s complicated, and not even factoring them into my life, I don’t know how to be with anyone, and I don’t know if I should be with anyone with the way I am anyway.”
“I don’t get it. If you’re ashamed-"
“It’s not that,” he interrupted, then he raised his voice. “I don’t care if the entire world knows how I feel about you!”
Klaus had been talking, but hearing that, the other room got very quiet.
“You are the first person I want to open myself to like this, or who has ever made me feel this way,” Five said, coming to you, his hands finding yours at your sides as he leaned into you. “I still want this more than anything, I just messed up because I am messed up.”
Coming closer, his lips touched yours so softly for just a fraction of a second. His eyes like gems, implored you-asking forgiveness.
“Since the other night, other than hating myself, I have wanted nothing more than to see your smile again,” he whispered, “even though what I did made it seem like I don’t care about you, that is about the farthest thing from the truth. Will you give me a second chance to show you how much you mean to me?”
You were pretty sure you couldn’t have made your lips form the word no, no matter how hard you tried.
“Are you sure you’re not embarrassed about this?” you questioned, your fingers making soothing circles along the undersides of his wrists.
Five smiled again. “I’m sure.”
“Prove it.”
“You forgive me then?”
“I’m working on it, but you have a lot of making up to do.”
Five’s hand moved around to your lower back, sliding up the back of your shirt, pulling you closer. You nudged his nose with yours.
“Like I said, prove it,” you softly repeated, daring him to show you that he meant what he said about not caring if his family or anyone else knew.
Five glanced over your shoulder, as if he could see your guests even though there was a wall in the way. His hand moved along your hip, slipping below the waistband of your sweatpants. “What do you have in mind for how I can prove it to you, handsome?”
He plucked the knot in your drawstring free, pulling the bunched cotton at your waist, loosening it so his hand could slip inside your pants.
“This, maybe?” he hummed against your ear, his fingers just under the elastic of your briefs.
You looked back at him with pleading eyes.
“Your bedroom is right over there but you want it right here, don’t you dirty boy?” he taunted.
There was no time for a comeback, only a shuttered breath before Five’s hand dove lower and you gasped at the sudden feeling of his finger abruptly entering you.
A devilish smile lit up Five’s face. “Awww… Wet for me already? Such a good boy,” he chuckled as his finger began to move, lovingly stroking the lubrication upwards.
You lowered your head against his neck, your body already tightening with pleasure from the feel of his finger rubbing against your clit.
Five kissed your forehead as you clung to him, his words tickling the shell of your ear as he spoke. "Wanna give our audience a show? You were amazing the other night, but I’m sure if we both try really hard, we can do better this time.”
You whimpered, trying to put your thighs together so you could increase the friction. Five brought another finger into the game trailing his digits up and down before flicking them against you, making you let out a small moan.
A shout came from the other room. “Hey! While you guys are in there, you should make some more popcorn!”
Twisting just enough, you snatched a bag of microwave pop off the counter, furiously tearing into the plastic with your teeth before spitting it out. You reached back, yanking the microwave open, carelessly tossing it in there without looking.
After you slammed the door shut, while smiling at you looking so fucking cocky, Five helpfully reached up, punching in the popcorn button before he hit start. He raised a brow. “Looks like I better get to work. We have a countdown, sweetheart.”
Moving his fingers quickly, jerking you hard, you let out a low groan that got much higher pitched when you felt the warmth of his erection nudging your hip.
Riding Five’s glorious fingers, but thinking of him slowly entering you with his heavy cock instead had your eyes rolling back in your head. The agonizing pace he was setting making your moans of complaint louder.
“That’s it, baby, louder,” he encouraged, gazing at you with half lidded eyes that were so beautiful.
“I need more,” you hissed, gritting your teeth.
“So needy,” he teased, just before his finger dipped inside you again, only this time crooked up just a little before he pulled it out again.
Then, just as you thought the bastard was going to really start finger fucking you, he slipped his hand out of your pants leaving your cunt clenching around nothing. After your waistband snapped against your tensed abs, Five brought his slicked finger to his mouth, making a naughty show of sucking it clean.  
“I fucking hate you!” you growled.
If he tried to leave you with blue balls again, you were going to kill him!
Five gave you a sly grin and you frowned. “I’m going to make you take that back,” he menacingly sang, then suddenly your pants and underwear were tugged down, and your legs were forcefully spread open by his knees wedging yours wide.
His hands come up your sides, moving under your shirt, over your rib cage. His eyes looked into yours, watching you for signs of distress as his fingers moved up, traveling over the flattened planes of your pecs.
You closed your eyes and you felt Five rest his forehead against yours.
His hand smoothed down to your hips again, stopping.
You took a deep breath.
“You are the most handsome man I have ever seen,” he breathed, throwing you off even more.
To say your senses were heightened was an understatement. Every sound your friends made in the other room only added to the tension brewing. All they had to do was come around the corner and they could see you back up against your counter with Five dominatingly standing between your legs as your pants and underwear lay in a heap at your ankles.
Five moved his forehead away from yours. “I will stop if you want me to. If not, you know what to say,” he soothed. “You want me to suck you off, right here. Right now. With them listening.”
��Little explosions started to go off inside the microwave.
 You had never been so hot and bothered in your life. You moaned desperately, “Five, you fucking-!"
"Shh...” Five teased as his hand moved up over your mouth to silence you. "Can’t have you getting too loud. Don’t want anyone thinking I’m in here doing awful things to you.” He leaned in, his breath ruffling the short ends of your hair, his words ominously intimidating. “I want to hear you beg.”
“Please,” you whimpered under his hot fingers.
"Sorry, what was that?" Five asked, sweet as honey while moving his hand a little so you could say it louder.
“Please!”
“That’s it.” Five’s sinful looking grin spread across his entire face.
He got down on his knees. Not taking his eyes off you, he pushed up your t-shirt just a little so he could leave a trail of wet kisses along the fine trail of hair leading from your belly button downward.
He let out a heavy breath, hovering over your sex. “You’re perfect, you know that, right?” he said, then his tongue drug along your length before flicking against the tip of your swollen clit.
“Oh, FUCK,” you loudly cursed.
You tried to relax and keep your hips still as Five licked at you slowly, but with the way his tongue was pushing between your thickened folds it was impossible
A bitten whimper croaked out of you as he licked up a stripe while slowly palming his own dick. You lowered to your head, your fingers threading through his hair, tightening.
You gasped when Five began sucking you. His hum of approval and the sting of pleasure from his teeth accidentally dragging as he sucked a little too roughly, left your thighs shaking and the next thing you knew, you were grinding down on him trying to get more.
Undeterred, by you humping his face, Five continued to contentedly lap at you. At this point, you didn’t know what to focus on, the pleasure that was tearing through your veins, the screams coming for movie, the people who could come in the kitchen at any second, or the fact that there was no way Five was able to breathe correctly with the way he was going at it, his whole face buried between your legs, fucking you.
Everything clouded over. His hands were plastered to your thighs, his hair was sticking out in a million places, and his tongue kept probing inside your entrance, devouring you before he came back up to harshly flick at your clit again.
Your body fought against the invasive sensation. Vulgar noises were being forced out of you, but you couldn’t cum no matter how badly you wanted to.
The microwave beeped.
“I-I fff-fu-ah-ck,” you stammered as you tugged at Five’s dark waves, attempting to separate your throbbing sex from his mouth, but he wasn’t having any of that.
He grasped your waist, holding you in place, hungrily demolishing you. He was like an animal, the scratchiness of his very light stubble only adding to the brutality of what he was doing to you.
It felt like every nerve in your body was being touched at once. You were being torn apart more and more with each trail of his tongue and rub of his fingers, pinching and pulling you between forefinger and thumb as he sucked your clit like a dick.
As your orgasm hit, it felt electric, a flash after flash of hot white light.
Five made you cum so hard that you totally forgot that he was fisting his own cock, but he sure was, and he was loudly moaning while doing it and still sucking you with the most tender of kisses, making sure not to leave you until you’d ridden out all your crashing waves of pleasure.  
When he finally came up for air, his face from his eyes down was shining and his smug grin proved that he could have cared less that he was a mess.
 “So, did you enjoy cumming on my face?” he rhetorically questioned.
He lifted himself off the ground, staring at you as he leaned in, connecting your lips, making you taste yourself on his tongue.
“I am not sure. It was okay, I guess,” you said, smirking when he pulled away, wiping his face and then yours with the sleeve of his shirt.
“Maybe one more try, with a little more tongue and teeth this time and you’ll have a more definitive answer?” he suggested.
He started to drop back down, and even though your body felt like jello, you pulled him back up easily enough.
As you were reaching to pick up your pants, Five took advantage of you dropping your guard to quickly spin you around, your socked feet slipping on the floor before he aggressively pulled your hips out, making you present your ass to him.
You heard him hastily unhooking his belt, the metal clanking together before you heard his zipper coming down, then his body molded to your backside, the tip of his thick cock dangling between your legs.
“We aren’t done and I’m not stopping until they know you’re mine,” he said while lovingly massaging the side of your ass.
He started nudging himself against your inner thigh and you let out a little whimper. “So cute, just like your little dick,” he mocked. Then he moved his hand around you, tugging you out a little more from the counter so he could grope you, making you shudder.
He slapped your ass hard, the thwack sure to make everyone’s head in the other room spin in your direction. You jolted up. You heard your friends laughing, then Five spanked you again. "Fuck!” you cried, moving your ass against his cock even tighter.
“You really want it, don’t you baby,” Five growled in your ear, slapping your ass again.
“Please!" you begged with your head falling back against Five’s shoulder before rolling to the side so you could see him.
“You want danger?” he purred as he yanked up his shirt, letting his predatory eyes narrow at the sight of his cock wedged between your cheeks.
You said nothing, so, looking like a mad man, he reached up, taking hold of your neck.
You whined and squirmed in his grasp as his other hand cupped you bare. He slid his fingers inside as his thumb swirled over your slippery clit. Before you could make a sound, he started to choke you. 
He fingered your hole roughly, as he cut off the flow of oxygen to your brain. You couldn’t even think. You were drowning with desire, your body submitting.
Five started to rut his hips into you as you lost your mind, moaning into the palm of his hand.
That’s when Klaus called out. “How’s that popcorn coming, boys? Better not be any dick in it!”
As Five fucked into you and his second finger slide inside, you all but screamed through his fingers. “Mmmfff-fuck, Ff-ive!”
If Five hadn’t thought to muzzle you, you were being so loud, it wouldn’t just be the people in the living room aware of what he was doing to you.
As if that wasn’t enough, Five bit down on your shoulder through your shirt, thrusting as hard and as fast as he could go.
You felt your orgasm building all the way from your toes to your stomach. Your calves painfully flexed as you bucked your hips, trying to get more.
Five let out a moan of his own, and the pleasure of his fingers, the dizziness of being choked, along with the pain from his teeth marking had you clenching around his fingers.
The only sounds that could be heard in the room were the sounds of squelching, your moans, and Five’s sexy grunting.
Yanking your face back, he took his hand off your mouth, forcing his tongue onto yours, aiming to take you for all you were worth.
Your walls contracted around him, spilling fresh liquid pleasure with his every thrust.
His breath and his movements started getting more erratic, and he let out a few manic sounding noises.
He only stopped slipping his dick up and down your crack for a second to reposition himself. Apparently, the new angle was even better for him because when he started back up, his fingers in you started to move again too and that got you cursing and gasping into his hand again.
"Good boy. Let it out. Your pussy is mine now,” he growled, but he didn’t let you let it out as he clamped down on your mouth harder and slammed into you with all the energy he had.
You peaked again, him clinging to you, your stifled gasps hissing through his fingers.
“So perfect,” he breathed, then he let you free, the air filling your lungs doing nothing to clear your clouded mind and you helplessly slumped over.
One of his hands kept a tight hold on your hip, the other taking care of his own need. The sight of you bent over on the counter in front of him had Five grunting and growling as he stroked himself, his cum splattering all over your abused ass.
When Five was done, he crashed into you, pulling you up in a lovers embrace from behind, panting harder than he had been the entire time. The second he had enough air to speak, he did. “That was- Fuck."
You were out of it, legs shaking, mouth agape, head lolling to the side. He grabbed your face and languidly kissed you before breaking away, his lips moving along your sweat moistened neck as he said, “I want you and only you and I don’t care who knows. Don’t you ever question that again.”
“Ready or not, the men out here are demanding a proof of life check after that beautiful screaming performance, and we need more sustenance, so pull your pants up! I am coming in,” Klaus suddenly shouted.
Scrambling, you and Five both untangled yourselves. He snatched your hand towel off the counter, taking it to your butt cheeks, doing his best to wipe you first, then himself.
Dropping to the floor, he started pulling your sweatpants up, then sure you had them in hand, Five started trying to fix his own rumpled clothing.
“Is my little brother behaving himself?” Klaus questioned and by the way he said it, you could tell he had a huge smile even before he rounded the corner, eyeing you both up proudly.
“Why wouldn’t I be?” Five fired back, with his pants only just zipped up, the ends of his belt hanging in front of the prominent tent he was still sporting. 
“Oh, I don’t know… Sounded like you were getting a little frisky in here is all,” Klaus replied.
Five reached over, opening the microwave, throwing the bag of popcorn at his brother.
As one would expect, Klaus started tossing the bag, hand to hand. “Ouch! Hot! Hot!”
You couldn’t help but laugh. That’s how mind blowingly dazed you were. You could tell it took a great deal of effort for Five to pry himself from you and you were still having a hard time standing up straight, so you had no idea how he was composing himself so well but then again, he didn’t just cum three times.
“If only I could blink us out of here,” he muttered while sticking the prong of his belt through the length, tightening it as he looked at you fumbling the strings on your sweatpants.
“Blink?” you questioned, unable to stop laughing as you said it because for the life of you, you couldn’t perform the simple task of tying a knot.
“What my adorable brother is referring to,” Klaus said, “is a thing we used to call a thing he used to do.” He reached out, ruffling Five’s already fucked up hair. “He’s super fast, but you already knew that,” he said while winking at you, “He used to be able to blink or as the common man says, telapor-"
“If you don’t shut your yapper, I am going to shut it for you,” Five snapped, while reaching over to tie your pants up since you’d failed and they were already slipping down.
“Oh… Not going there yet. Okay,” Klaus said as he shrugged off whatever Five was angrily trying to get him to shut up about. “You two joining us for the second movie?” Klaus mumbled with a handful of freshly popped kernels in his mouth.
You looked at Five. He took you by the hand, grabbing the bottle of liquor off the counter in his other, leading you out there.
Moving to your spot on the couch, Five sat down first, pulling you down next to him. As soon as you were seated, he wrapped his arms around you, pulling you in tighter, his lower leg hooking yours to him as he took your throw blanket, tossing it over you both.
“So, you guys a thing now,” your buddy next to him asked while giving you a smart-ass grin.
Five glanced at you. He squeezed his hand that was already in yours. “Yes,” you firmly stated and just like the amazing friends they were, they all let it go. They could see this is what you wanted. It was written all over your hopeful face.
You leaned back against Five’s warmth, the comforting rise and fall of his chest reassuring you that everything was as perfect as it seemed.
Every so often, as his fingers absentmindedly trailed down your arm, Five would softly kiss the side of your cheek, then nuzzle his face into your hair.
~~~
When you woke, hours later to one of your friends leaving and Five attempting not to wake you as he quietly answered something his brother had just said, you had no idea what time it was.
“Klaus was planning on staying at my place,” Five whispered. “We have that family birthday thing early in the morning and we are riding together.” He slid you out from under him. “You want me to carry you to your room?” he asked, as he righted himself.
“I doubt you could,” you said back while smiling up at him in the dim light as you stretched your legs out, accidentally kicking your zonked out friend who was sprawled out on the other end of the couch.
“Goodnite,” Klaus whispered, before he went out the door.
Swooping down, Five gently kissed you and kept on kissing you until you started to laugh over how obviously he didn’t want to go. “Best night of my life,” he chuckled, his own smile stretching as he finally pulled away. “I’ll be back sometime early afternoon. Can I see you again?”
Stroking your fingers along his jaw, you whispered back, “You better.”
Five’s tired eyes softened even more. He brushed his lips against yours one more time.
Then he was gone.
~~~
Back to reality, your mind lost in a past that doesn’t exist anymore while your body remains stuck in a present form of hell you can’t escape, lying there in your bed, you keep trying to work through your memories of Five.
For his part, like he always does at night, Five stays with you in the only way he feels that he can, over 60 years of time separating you as he sits in his chair in front of the Infinite Switchboard.
After thrashing around in your blankets, reliving things you don’t want to let go, giving into your body’s most primal urges, you shove your hand in your pants, digging your fingers against your clit, tugging and pulling and rubbing. Breathing heavily, your release comes and goes way too fast, giving you nothing to replace the man you refuse to let go.
Finally, worn out and mentally broken, your breathing slows, and your eyes close.
You fall into a fitful sleep, your face pinched with the same stress it’s had since you entered your apartment earlier that night.
A few minutes before this, with his reddened eyes darting around as he tries to squash his own anguish, trying in vain to convince himself that what he’s seeing isn’t because of him, Five throws his arms down on the messy desk space, burying his face in the fold of his arm.
You’re upset, that much he is willing to admit.
You have old news clippings of him and his faded collector cards, and other silly trinkets from the days the Umbrella Academy meant something to the world.
You only have his.
Going through the list of issues in his head, Five comes up with only more problems with all this.
All that is something, but it's not like you would be harboring some old crush on the nerdy little 13-year-old he was in those pictures, because back when those cards were cool, you were only four years old! Back then, you probably didn't even know your address, let alone who the kids who lived at the Umbrella Academy were. But despite that, you clearly have something going on and it’s clearly aimed at him.
You moan repeatedly as the blankets covering you shuffle.
“Fuck…” Five breathes as he looks up, realizing what you are doing.
What you have going on is clearly at least partially a horny thing, and an angry thing, and fuck, fuck, FUCK!
Five can’t stop looking at you writhing against your hand.
He shifts his legs apart, refusing to give his hardening cock the attention it's screaming for. It’s bad enough that he’s watching you jerk off, but doing that with you, like this…
No.
“God damn it!” he curses, kicking his legs out, throwing his hands back behind his head as he forces himself to look at the floor.
No one else remembers, so there is no way you do! 
This has to be something else causing this, right?
Swallowing the lump in his throat, he looks back up. Your breaths are slowing. Your hand slips up along your stomach, laying limply against your t-shirt.
Your eyes stay closed and Five wants so badly to kiss the lids covering them. Since he can’t, he does what he’s always done, he imagines the things he wants.
Shutting his own eyes, he imagines himself there with you, protectively folded around you, your bodies illuminated by the muted silhouettes from the leaves fluttering outside in the canopy of trees outside your window. 
He can almost feel himself kissing the moonbeam dancing across your cheek, flickering along the ridge of your nose-almost.
There’s no warmth to this dream, no sensation of your touch lovingly holding him back.
This is all there had ever been for Five for nearly a lifetime, but now, thanks to you, he knows what it’s like to have something real, and now he is drowning in the shocking reality of his endless loneliness.
Chilled, but unwilling to move to an office to throw himself down on something more comfortable, when his breathing melts into a rhythm of rest, Five floats away with you, going into a nightmarish dreamscape, a place moments before the world fell apart and he lost you.
~~~
As your sleep deepens, you start tossing and turning, your mind projecting images of you bursting out the doors of your apartment. You didn’t care how terrified you were or that you had no weapon to defend yourself against whatever was happening. You had to get to Five.
You took off, sprinting down the sidewalk in the direction of the explosions, rather than in the opposite direction like everyone else was doing.
The sky was casting a strange glow of orange and violet light over everything. It looked like an alien landscape, not the loud city with its shops and business filled with people doing normal things, unless you considered running for their life normal.
You knew it was crazy for you of all people to think you could do anything to help, but it was also crazy that the Five apparently had superpowers, but you'd seen it for yourself on your TV, and the people with him did too.
You kept on, moving along, seeing the destruction getting worse the closer you got to where the news had shown the fighting.
The air near the ground was thick with black smoke as you got closer, but you kept going, knowing from what you’d seen on the news that Five was there, but nothing could have prepared you for it when you rounded a corner and saw all of them. Like some kind of science fiction movie on crack, everywhere you looked, unexplainable things were happening that shouldn’t be.
It was madness, all of it, the way Five was disappearing and reappearing, the way they were shooting laser beams from their eyes and throwing cars like they were nothing. Klaus was there too, like some kind of oracle, casting his hands out, making phantom-like figures appear out of nowhere, all the luminous bodies he’d created readily joining the fight.
Either brave or stupid, you started to cross the battlefield of flipped cars that lay between you and them, staying down, trying not to get hit by the barrage of bullets and other things flying in your direction.  
Five was yelling, calling for everyone to get together. He wasn’t okay, you could see that. He was staggering, trying so hard to stand in the storm that was enveloping him.
He fell to his knees, screaming for them. 
Blood smeared across his face as his hand came up, wiping his cheek. 
The blood was gushing from his nose and seeping down his neck from his ears, but he kept screaming for them. The near blinding light kept growing, extending out from his hands and entire body.
Between broken car windows, you watched as the group gathered around him, two of them looking like they were sending out some kind of force field that was keeping them safe from the bullets and the fire-like aura that was glowing down from the sky.
Then, to your horror, you realized the fire was actually coming from some of them. Their flesh was cracked and blackened, like lava was running under their skin.
They were burning. 
Five was burning!
Your voice cut through the air, penetrating the chaos. “FIVE!”
Just then, extreme pain was the only way to describe what you felt. 
A deafening blast sent you flying, slamming your spine against the door of an upside-down car. Pain radiated through you. You reactively curled in on yourself. You desperately clasped your hands over your ears, trying to block out the high-pitched sound that was trying to stab your brains out, but you painfully realized that the ringing wasn’t something you could stop.
You could hardly move, gasping for air that wouldn’t fill your lungs, but then suddenly Five was next to you, eyes wide, searching you over, saying something, but all you could see was his lips moving as his hands frantically moved over you, trying to cover all the places where your clothes were becoming wet with blooming circles of red.
You watched Five’s mouth repeating the words, “I will fix this.” He was saying it over and over.
Then, just like that, stinging pelts of liquid hit your face as the side of Five’s skull ripped open.
You watched as if in slow motion as the inside of his head spilled out like a macabre brain soup. Then you watched in horror as he tumbled over, your shell-shocked body not working fast enough to catch him.
The side of Five’s ashen face slammed into the glass covered concrete.
Scrambling to your knees, you pulled him to you, his broken head rolling limply in your lap as you screamed. 
Your tears mixed with his blood. 
You didn’t even notice Klaus until he was right there. He came sprinting to a stop a few yards away, seeing you and his brother.
“Help him,” you begged. You refused to take your eyes from Five’s, then Klaus took off, shouting something.
“No, no, no! Please, no!” you wailed as Five remained motionless, legs twisted in a way that made him look so small.
Five was not small. He was strong and he was…
He was everything.
Suddenly a wind from nowhere started whipping up tiny bits of debris from all around you. Looking up, you saw the impossible. There was a ghostly image of Five out in the street next to his brother where they were standing in a blue-ish purple electrical storm filled with glistening marigold, fire and light.
You could see Five over there, but he was also still with you, his warm blood matting his dark strands of hair, coating your fingers as you cradled his head as if you could fix the damage done to him if you willed the hole in him closed, but his empty green eyes continued to stare off at nothing.
The torrents of energy that Five had been violently projecting before he’d appeared over by you grew stronger, making it near impossible to make out anything happening over by them, but you were able to see him out there, lightning filled hands clenched like claws as fire like sparkles swirled around him and the strange static and twinkling lights of power weren’t just coming from Five. It was coming from all of them, as if mixing.
Dazed, and evidently not stable, they all simultaneously fell to their knees, but Five didn’t this time.
His face was no longer spattered with his blood as he looked up, past his siblings as they fell to the ground as if they were puppets whose strings had just been cut.
As your eyes met, it was as if you were seeing Five for the first time ever, seeing all versions of him, and it wasn’t just happening to him, though the ghostlike projections of Five were dramatically different compared to those of his siblings. He was older in some of them, but you were sure it was him, with that funny mustache and his same soft eyes.
Five was that man, and then he wasn’t again, he was just a boy, so young, so angry, nothing but skin and bones, his tormented face covered in ash and grime. 
All of them, all the different versions of them were morphing, snapping together with alternate images of themselves, like a flip book that’s pages clapped with thunder as they turned.
Then, out of nowhere, out of anyone who could have been out there in all that madness, Reginald Hargreeves, the richest man in the world, was towering over you. His expression was serene as he looked down at the dead boy you were crying over. Then he looked up, his expression not scared at all as he said, “Hold on to him. It will all be over soon.”
Bleeding out and going into shock, you looked back out at the other Five. Even in the distance, you could see his mouth. 
His mouth! The one you knew intimately, pulled up just a little as he gave you a dreamy smile, as if he was seeing something in all this that you couldn’t.
You screamed Five’s name as the ball of fire inside him began to consume what was left of his crumbling body.
“No!” you cried, but this time Five couldn’t hear it.
The bubble around them burst, life and death, creation and destruction, you, Five, all of it and time itself, all tied to him and the tale of rebirth, and it was coming for you in a wall of fire.
Your own terrified scream echoing inside your head was the last thing you heard.
Then you were all gone.
~~~
“NO!” You cry out, trying to free yourself from your knotted blankets. You’re in the darkness of your bedroom again, no longer holding Five’s dead body while you watched the ghost of him in the distance, being taken away by an otherworldly fire.
Your heart feels like it could rip out of your chest, it's pounding so hard.
Your hands come up, digging at your eyes as if you can make it all go away, but the heat of your tears is as real as the pain of losing him. “Please no,” you helplessly whimper as you pull your legs up under your arms so you can drop your head between your knees. “I need you, Five,” you sob, your body shuddering.
“I am here, please don’t cry, I am so sorry.”
Your head shoots up, your eyebrows flying halfway up your face, the thumping in your chest threatening to do you in as you blink, over and over, seeing Five right there, at the side of your bed, looking like he just woke up, but looking as beautifully disheveled in his three-piece suit as he always does.
“Ff-Five?” your voice cracks.
“Hey, handsome,” he quietly breathes as he sinks down on the bed next to you, his legs dangling over the side as he reaches over, gently brushing a sweat-dampened piece of hair out of your eyes.
“You you-you-"
“I know,” Five says, pulling you to him.
Arms around him, he squeezes you tight. You breathe in, your face buried against his collar because you’re still not sure he’s real.
“I didn’t think it was possible, but-” He stops, pulling back enough to make you look at him. His eyes glaze over in thought as he lets out a shaky breath. “No one else but us remembered, and I didn’t-" His teary words catch in his throat. “I didn’t want to hurt you. I never should have-” A single tear rolls down his cheek. “I never should have let this happen, but nothing could have prepared me for you and how you made me feel, and I- Even if you remember me, I shouldn’t be here, but I heard you crying, and I had to-"
He tries to pull away.
“NO! Don’t you dare go!” You give Five’s shoulders a little shake, “Don’t you dare leave me again! And what the hell do you mean you heard me? Where were you, in my fucking closet!”
“No, I was pathetically hiding out in a musty old office building in 1955.”
“Okay- Okay-" Your heart is racing so hard you can’t think but that makes no sense. “What the fuck, Five!”
He lowers his face like he wants to disappear and that only makes you cling to him tighter.
“The place I am talking about, and my association with it is a long story,” he starts, “-and I promise I will tell you everything if you want me to, but the reason I was there now was because it’s the only place I could go to see you.” He looks up, his eyes filling. “There’s a machine I invented, it lets the operator dial in places and times. I have missed you so fucking much,” he rambles, clearly spiraling, but you refuse to let him go no matter how confused and mad you are.
“Look, the things you say are just- Yeah.” You let out a puff of air, shaking your head over all this craziness. “But I want you! I don’t care about the rest!"
“I’m not who you think I am. I have done so many horrible things,” he interrupts.
“Five, I know that you are so many more things than what I thought you were in the beginning, but I want all of them. I saw you! All of you! You had a mustache for Christ Sake! I know who you are!”
“You don’t know all of it,” he whispers.
“I don’t care! You saved us. I don’t understand it, but I know you did. You were the only one in the end before everything disappeared. I thought you were dead!”
“I know.”
“You told me that I’m the first person you wanted to open yourself up to,” you continue, “Did you mean it when you said that?”
His lower lip quivers as he nods. “I meant every word of it, and you are still all I want.”
“Then don’t leave me again!” you shout at him, pushing him down on your bed.
Five still looks totally lost but with your insistence, he surrenders himself to you heavily crawling on top of him.
Fully reclined, you throw your leg over his, coming down at his side to tuck your head under his chin, effectively detaining him but letting him breathe. You can hear his heart hammering in his chest as he looks down at you peering up at him. 
His eyes search yours he quietly asks, “Are you sure you still want this?”
“Yes, I am sure,” you insist.
His long fingers trace a line up your back, skating the surface of your shirt.
“Please talk to me, Five. I meant it when I said I want this with you more than anything.”
“Why?” he questions, sounding so dejected.
You sit up, straddling him so you can keep him trapped but also take him on, face to face. “Because even with all the crazy things you told me, knowing what I know now, I think you were telling me the truth about all of it, and you know what, I am not scared. I don’t care how old you are, or if you were an assassin. I don’t care what you’ve done to get here. All that matters is you are.”
“You mean that?” he whispers, reaching around you, his long fingers tracing a soothing line up your back.
You nod and his hand comes up, moving to the back of your head, pulling your lips to his in a chaste kiss that ends all too fast.
You try to kiss him again but Five turns his head, squirming away, not letting you.
Your eyebrows come together in frustration.
“You know… For all my mistakes, I finally thought I had it all figured out, but then this…” His voice trails off as his hands move around your backside, grabbing your ass. “This never should have happened. You weren’t supposed to remember, but you evidently do, or you wouldn’t be trying to hump my leg because you know that getting me hard is going to help you get your way.”
You look down where your crotch is pinning his quad, and he laughs.
You’re just about to tell the asshole you are not trying to hump his leg when he says, “The reason I think you remember,” He cracks a sad smile, making him look so beautifully broken, “The reason you remembered, is because I fell in love with you. A part of you was with me in the end and I couldn’t let it go. You’re a part of me now whether you like it or not.”
“You love me?”
“More than anything.”
In the subsequent silence, your shoulders wither, a single thought floating among the sea of worries in your mind.
You love him too.
You come at him, there’s no stopping you from kissing him. Like you are doing to him, Five’s hands grasp at your body, everywhere they can reach, caressing, groping, pinching, anything to feel each other. 
Jutting your cunt across his thigh, you assault his lips, drawing your teeth across his pout in retribution for him thinking you wouldn’t want this.
Stroking his neck, his hands holding you in place, he moans as you grind his leg. Adding to your pleasure, Five begins exploring your neck with his tongue, tasting your skin, licking the sweat of your nightmare clean off as you rut into him, panting and gasping, filling the quiet of the small room.
Boldly sticking your hand down your pants, rubbing your cock, you lower your voice as deep as you can as you ask, “Did you watch me do this?”
“Yes,” Five rasps, his hands moving down, suddenly taking you by the waist. Like lightning striking, the air around you lights up, every nerve ending in your body comes alive as you’re flung through a swirling storm of sapphire, coming back to the present a millisecond later with your back slamming on your mattress.
Head still spinning, Five falls over you from the air, his body still glowing in his whirl of magical light. His irises dance with embers as he dives in, kissing your neck again.
“What. The Fuck Was That? Did you just teleport me?” you deliriously groan as he attacks you.
"No, I blinked you," he corrects, "It's a spontaneous reaction to having a very naughty boy trying to fuck my lap,” Five informs you with his lips at your earlobe, before kissing down, gnawing on your jaw, as he attempts to blindly unbutton his shirt.
Oh, my God, this man...
Not satisfied with the speed, you begin to help him, and his smile at your impatience is almost as hot as the sight of him laying over you, shrugging it off. Five is nothing but lean valleys of muscle, all pointing to the dangerous weapon he’s packing in his pants, but interestingly enough, his famous Umbrella Academy tattoo on his wrist isn’t the only tattoo he’s got.
Seeing geometrically balanced circles and lines criss-crossing in the middle of his chest must have you making the funniest looking face because Five starts laughing.
“This,” He points to the black and gray washes of ink marking him. “This is evidence of one of my many blunders through time, but it’s worth the pain and looking like a fucking idiot if it means I get to see you looking at me like that.”
You trace the lines. “You are beautiful, Five, all of you.”
“As long as you think so, because I think I’m stuck with it now,. I am a complete package of the old me, the young me, and the tattooed and very fucking horny me,” he says before much more seriously asking, "You ok taking yours off too?"
You nod and Five dips low, using his nose, he starts nudging your t-shirt shirt up. He playfully sucks and nips you all the way up to one of the darkened pink scars under your pecs. Your breath hitches as he traces a line over it with his fingertip, then slowly begins to kiss you there too, his teeth grazing your nipple for good measure.
“So perfect,” he hums, sending a direct signal from you’re the now hardened nub all the way down to your groin. 
As you’re reeling over him saying that and the feeling of him flicking his tongue across your other pec, Five’s hands start moving up your sides, slowly lifting your shirt over your head.
Your legs tense, fighting against the growing ache between them as Five kisses down your torso, marking you where the skin dips at your hip, the palm of his hand hot as it rests over your abs, firmly holding you down.
Already trembling, you let out a small cry of desperation.
Gazing up at you with his pupils blown dark with desire, Five tears open the button holding your jeans closed. Lifting for him, he pushes your remaining clothes down your flushed thighs.
With you fully naked, your bodies roll slightly as Five comes down on the bed next to you. You spread your legs and just as fast, he reaches between them, rolling your clit between thumb and forefinger.
You gasp your approval, “Fuck yeah, don’t stop.”
“Fuck, you’re so hard for me,” Five groans, just below your ear, sending a shiver zipping up your spine as a gush of wet drips out of you. “I can’t get enough of your dick,” he says while playfully pecking your jaw.
“Same,” you gasp, your enlarged clit so sensitive, you can’t help but whine like a puppy when his hand starts to firmly rub it.
Your hand reactively grips his shoulder painfully hard the faster he goes, and his eyes narrow dangerously in response.
Knowing without words what you need, barely thirty seconds into it, two fingers start jabbing inside you, aiming at your sweet spot.
“Holy fuck,” you breath before Five can capture your mouth in a hard kiss again.
As your hips jerk into his hand, Five’s hand snakes down along your side to rub his own cock, all the while he never stops sucking at your neck or giving you needly little licks in between his kisses. Soon the nips get hard enough to make you throw your head back, thrashing.
With Five jerking himself, bucking against you, your hands grip at the sheets, hanging on for dear life as your walls start spasming.
Even though you’re flailing, moaning loud as your hips jerkily fuck into his fingers, you can hear that Five is humming all sorts of dirty things, the vibrations of his words against your throat sending your brain even further down the spiral of your fuckedy fuck land.
Having brought you over the edge, he pulls out. His hand on your thigh moves around you, gripping your ass to pull you in closer as he rolls on top of you.
Five licks at your lips before he slides his hands down to the back of your thighs to pick you up, grinding your crotch into his restrained shaft. “God, I want to fuck you so badly,’ he growls before crashing your lips together again.
Five’s powerful body bears down on you, the drag of his cock between your legs too much but also not enough. Encouraging him to keep up what he was doing, only with his pants off, you try to push his pants down, even as he’s still urgently rocking his hips into you.
“Fuck,” he groans, his teeth grazing your neck as he gasps for air. His hips twitch to a stop at the feeling of his cock about to spring free.
“I want all of you, Five,” you breathe, holding his cheeks under your palms as you pull his head up, making him look at you.
“Are you sure?”
“More than anything. I love you, Five.”
His soft eyes light up as if this wasn’t already obvious. He smiles down at you with an adoring look, caressing your face and pushing your hair aside as you blush under his loving gaze. He leans in to kiss along your jaw and down your neck as he scrambles to remove his pants with you helping him along, hooking your fingers under his tailored waistband, dragging them down his thighs, pushing them the rest of the way off with your feet.
“Oh Fuck,” Five groans as he lowers back down and his cock slips over the moist heat between your legs.
Instinctively, he starts to rut against you again. Before you can do more than hum a moan through your pinched lips, you feel the head of Five’s dick align with your throbbing hole. 
“Protection?” Five impatiently asks, coming to a full stop.
Drunk with desire, all you can do is shake your head no, but the message is clear. You don’t need it.
Tenderly squeezing your ass, with his eyes locked to yours and his voice barely above a whisper, Five asks, “You ready?”
“Yes,” you breathe, keeping your fingers threaded in his thick dark hair, holding him in place with one hand, the other sliding from his muscular back to gripe his shoulder.
He starts to push slowly. “Aw fuck” you moan as just the head of his cock slips in. You throw your head into the pillow, biting your lip to keep from crying out.
Five’s warm breath slowly fans over your neck. He’s not moving a single inch. “Does it hurt?”
“It- It’s good,” you huff, letting out a tense breath as you lift your hips higher, letting him know you can take it.
“That’s it, baby,” he soothes, as your body tightens and quivers along the thick length slowly filling you.
Not even full deep, your brain feels like it’s just flashed on and off and it’s not at all working right.
"You’re so fucking gorgeous," Five patiently huffs, his focus on gauging your every reaction, holding himself still as possible.
“More,” you whine.
You clench involuntarily, letting out a low moan when Five works his hips forward, then back a little, a pleasant change that has you twitching for him even more.
He dips to kiss you, gasping for breath as he opens you even more. Too much for him at once, he takes his kisses to your neck.
He takes a moment to pull half-out of you before digging back in. Firm, slow, and steady, he fucks his hips into you while he bears down with a hiss. Your walls clench him tight, the extra pressure drawing out a moan from both of you.
Your eyes flutter closed as your fingers scratch against Five back. His hips press up, aiming to get as deep as possible, where he stays for one moment before pulling out and thrusting halfway in again and again.
"Fuck, Five, fuck," you slur out as your body begins to slip and slide across your sheets.
He grabs hold of your knee, pushing it back to meet your shoulder, falling into you deeper on his next thrust and you let out wet gasp, before he starts fucking you at a maddening pace, in and out, in shallow thrusts.
As he looks between your bodies, watching with an adorable fascination as his cock disappears inside you, you cry out, “Faster.”
Five obliges.
He really starts moving and the feel of him pumping his whole length inside you has your body arching and writhing up from the bed, lips parted in broken moans that fill the room and your entire apartment and probably your entire floor.
“Yes, Five. Fuck yes! “Don’t stop-fucking-fff,” you stammer, moving your ass up slightly which drives him deeper and brings on more breathless curses from you both. He’s so deep each time his body meets yours he’s knocking the wind from your lungs in breathy consonants and vowels of nonsense.
“Mmmmffff- aaah-ahhh-"
“Fuck-you-rrr-such-ah-good-boy, so tight,” he incoherently gasps along with you, as he pistons his cock into you, his thick tip fucking your cunt just right.
You’re plunging into a freefall, the coiling inside you causing you to cry out his name. At the sound of it, Five’s mouth finds yours, sloppily kissing you.
You’re both breathing too heavily for the kiss to last very long because breathing through your noses isn’t giving either of you enough oxygen. Breaking away, his forehead presses to your shoulder, a curtain of his dark hair falling around it as his strong pelvic slams into you.
"Please- fuck- harder-" you plead, and your magical super boy grants your wish.
Your eyes roll back in your head as Five pounds you harder and faster. Head spinning, your heart feeling like it might burst, your entire body is screaming for release.
“Come on, cum for me,” Five growls before resting his palm over your clit, thrusting his hand in time to his hips.
Your brain is getting shook loose with each slam of his body smacking into yours, and your bed frame isn't doing much better as it creaks and thumps into the wall in a pattern that matches your curses.
"Fuck- Fuck- FUCK-"
You’re reduced to disjointed moans as you fall apart. Shaking head to toe through a mind-melting orgasm, the throbbing intensity as you cum hits you over and over until it completely overwhelms your senses and leaves you speechless.
“That’s right, cream on daddy’s cock,” Five encourages as he quickly flips his head back, his dampened hair falling right back in front of his eyes as he smirks.
“Five- Fu-ffff,” you wetly gasp.
“Ready for another one?” he asks, still undulating his cock as he quirks an eyebrow.
“Ww-wah? How are you doing this,” you ask, meaning how the fuck is he still fucking you! He said he’d been with someone else before, but… Fuck!
His smirk only gets bigger. “Lots of practice with a very receptive inanimate object, named Dolores,” he replies. “Now roll over. Don’t make me count to three,” he warns, before suddenly pulling out, leaving you reeling, his hands on your hips, rolling you over before he pulls your ass high in the air.
The heat of his cock hits your entrance with zero resistance and your body jumps forward when you feel his balls hit your ass.
That move gets you both hissing out strings of discombobulated profanities again as Five holds himself stock still, his eyes closing tight as if he’s in pain..
“Dolores?” you manage to choke.
“Desperate times,” he huffs in way of explanation, then just as the shocking statement he just made and the jolt of him bottoming out is starting to subside, Five smacks your ass, and he’s back to it, fucking into you with a relentless pace.
“Fu-ua-uch-yea-ah, so good,” he disjointedly praises as he rides your ass, hooking his feet inside your ankles so you can’t close your legs.
Your body tightens as his thrusts speed up. You shudder, mouth falling open with a shocked moan as you feel Five’s cock rutting against your insides, demanding every inch of your attention.
With your face down in your mattress, you gasp against moistened fabric. Your shaky fingers clutch at your fitted bedsheet, Five’s brutal pace making steady smack, smack, smack sounds.
You still have no idea how he’s doing it, but Five just keeps on going like his real superpower is that he’s the fucking Energizer Bunny.
Pulling your limp body up to his, Five’s face nuzzles against the back of your neck, hips rolling hard and fast, the sweat from your flush bodies only making it easier for him to fuck into like he’s a well-oiled machine.
“God, you’re magnificent. You feel so fucking good,” he breathes.
"Hnn-mm-unh, uh, uh, please, please-" you moan.
“I’m gonna cum inside you. And you’re gonna cum with me,” Five growls, bearing down on you harder.
You cry out, your next orgasm hitting you as Earth shattering at the first two. You’re shivering, open-mouthed and helpless as you start to feel his warmth spreading with each thrust, Five’s hips jerking slower and slower as he empties his throbbing cock.
He hisses, moaning out a melody of expletives as his hips stutter to a near halt. He just came hard, but that doesn’t stop him as he rolls you against the mattress, coming down next to you, his cock pumping into you a few more times until you’re both left panting and boneless.
He kisses the nape of your neck and tenderly brushes a sweaty strand of your hair from the side of your face. Five stays connected to you until your chests are both rising and falling much slower, then his softening length slips out on its own, a white ribbon of cum immediately spilling out of you, the feel and sight of it making Five let out the softest whimper of distress.
Not letting you go, he kisses your temple.
"That was amazing," he contentedly breathes.
You huff out a sigh in agreement, cheeks flushed, gaze half lidded.
"I didn’t hurt you?" he whispers, a hand coming up to brush over your jaw, so gently. The concern for your wellbeing is reflected in Five’s soft green eyes as he pulls himself up on a wobbly elbow to look at you better.
“Not at all," you mutter with a weak smile as you pull your blankets over, throwing them over both of you.
Five’s hair is sticking up in just about every direction and it’s only adding to the beauty of his dazed grin.
“I’m never leaving you again, that’s unless you make me,” Five murmurs as he lays back down, kissing your shoulder. 
“I can’t see that happening, unless you get all boring, getting up early, only to take afternoon naps on my couch before you finish your old man day with one of your exhilarating crossword puzzles rather than finding new ways you can pounce on me and spank my ass.”
He laughs. There’s an impish glint in his eyes, like the twinkles of distant starlight.
“Awww, sweetheart,” he mocks. “You make all my favorite hobbies sound like bad things” 
You lean into his touch, sighing in contempt before gently whispering, “Go to sleep and I’ll deal with you in the morning.”
Obediently shutting his droopy eyes, he whispers I love you. Then the prick sneakily pulls his hand back, then smacks you in the ass, making you yelp like a little girl.
Ass burning, your heart is full.
This is Five. The wonderful, amazing, sexy jerk you fell in love with.
Next to you, almost as soon as the quiet fills the space between you again, you can tell he’s drifting off to sleep.
Five is finally home.
You roll over just enough to watch him sleeping. 
He looks so peaceful. Like a very naughty angel. The best kind.
You kiss his forehead, and he pulls you back in, making you his little spoon.
Laying there, still trying to take in everything that just happened, you think about all the times Five made jokes about his traumatic life and his loneliness. You caught stolen glimpses of his pain in his sweet but sad smiles, shaking his head, eyelids fluttering closed as he determinedly set his jaw, acting like his memories didn’t hurt him.
Five tried to build a wall around his heart, the barriers entrenched by years of grief, but it all came crashing down at the world’s end. 
Now it’s time for happiness. 
~~~~~~~
Masterpost
Link to my other Tumblr story/art/and asks
Link to visit me direct on A03tua
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moonyswritinq · 9 months ago
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diego : "come on, just admit you have a thing for Five."
you : "no, I do not. 'Cause I'm not the kind to fall for a guy who flashes a smile."
five, overhearing : *sends you a smug smile*
klaus : "yes, you are."
you : "yes, I am."
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my-love-of-books · 9 months ago
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A/N: yeah no this is super short and entirely self-indulgent
Pairing: gn!reader x five hargreeves
Summary: reader has a nightmare, and five (their bf) comforts them
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That smile. That red-lipsticked smile of The Handler. She taunted me as I watch her smirk. Curious as to why, I trace her gaze to Five. He stands between us, looking back and forth in-between her and I, before walking towards her, and something inside told me that he wasn't coming back. That he was choosing the commission over me. "Five?" I asked "wha- where are you going? What are you doing?"
Once beside her, he turns around, scoffs and smirks, "you didn't think I'd really stay did you? Why would I, being with you is pointless."
My eyes burned, and my throat caved in. "But- but you said-"
"I lie for a living y/n. Damn I knew you weren't smart but I didn't think you were stupid"
It was like the air got sucked out of the room. The handler cackled and everything went black.
My eyes open and I breath with a start; it was a dream. I try to slow my breathing when I feel tears on my face. shit I cried in my sleep. I move to wipe the tears off my face when an arm around my waist tightened. "Baby? You okay?" A tired and angelic voice asks.
Afraid my words will betray me I just respond with an "mhm" and a nod while I wipe away the streaks on my face.
This seems to really wake him up "No your not. What's the matter what's going on?" Five sits up a bit more, leaning over me and caressing my cheek.
"Another nightmare?" He asks softly.
I nod.
"wanna talk about it?" More tears well up in my eyes at the thought of him leaving me for something better. I turn in his arms cling to him, looking for support; he hugs me tight and whispers into my hair "mkay, love. We can talk when you're ready." His heartbeat is soft, but rhythmic, and steady, and he smells like an old forest and the lavender soap they have here.
"please don't leave me," I whimper into his chest "please"
I feel his sharp intake of breath, "never, my love. I would sooner die without you"
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i-dont-wanna-be-me-anymore · 3 months ago
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Friends | Five H. x male!reader | Part 1!
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Five Hargreeves x male reader
SPOILER WARNING FOR SEASON 4 UNDER CUT!!!!!
Summary: Five, after gaining a job at the CIA, has found himself falling in love with his coworker, for whom which he both hates and admires. But after his brother gets kidnapped, Five has to resort to, for the first time in 50 years, trusting someone other than his family to help him. THIS IS KIND OF LONG SO BEAR WITH ME.
Warnings: fluff?, Cursing, mention of gun, frenemies SPOILERS FOR SEASON 4 ‼️
A/n: I just really hated the whole relationship between Five and Lila, so I’m erasing it, erasing their 7 years together, and making an ACTUAL uninvolved and un-family love interest for Five. This is also based off of the fact that Steve Blackman said he wanted to give Five a love interest whether it be a guy or a girl. I AM NOW A HEAVY BISEXUAL FIVE BELIEVER.
Part 2
• • • • •
It’s been 5 years since Five and his family reset the universe and brought about this new timeline. 5 years of trying to make his life worth living and actually trying to enjoy the peacefulness of this new life. But he couldn’t help but feel like something was missing. Something that he needed in order to keep him stable or at least just keep him from losing it. Maybe that something was actually a someone….
He always hated the thought of being completely alone. Ever since the apocalypse, losing his family and people that he loved or cared about was his number one fear. He didn’t want to ever be alone again.
In his new job with the CIA, he’s been able to observe and oversee what things could attempt to hurt those people that he cares about. Helped him have control over his life for once.
The only downside of the job was having to deal with stubborn coworkers and the terrible work hours. However, there was one person in particular that he was thinking of.
Y/n. He was a royal pain in the ass to Five. He was a talkative person. Always wanting to know how Five’s day was, always asking about his cases. And when Five would interact with him, he would sometimes leave mid conversation just to piss him off.
He thrived off making him annoyed, like it was his reason for being there in the first place.
And although Five would never admit it, but Y/n did have some redeemable qualities.
He was intelligent. One of the most intelligent people Five knew, all things considered. In his eyes, he was smart and knowledgable when it came to his job, he took it seriously, but in other cases he would always act rather stupid.
Another thing, that Five again would never admit to others or himself, was that Y/n was undeniably hot. And Five was honestly somewhat attracted to him because of that.
Not attracted to him in the way where he wanted to be with him, no…
Never in the way where he wanted to have a life with him…
Get Past being coworkers and actually learn more about him…
Have longer conversation rather than the short and sweet ones that they already had…
No, not in those ways at all.
When it came to work, Five would always try to find a way to swerve around him, try not to get caught up in whatever stupid conversation he wanted to have with him. But when he did get caught up, there would be times where he would leave an implicit comment and then rush off, ending their conversation.
Despite interacting with him, Five preferred to work alone in the office. Allowed him to know everything that he needed to know without having to ask anyone, or communicate with anyone…unless it was his boss, Lance, whose office he was currently sitting in.
Lance sat in his chair, staring at the “teen” for a bit before speaking.
“How are you handling your job? You enjoying the experience?”
“Yes, sir, I’m very grateful for this job and I intend to do everything I can to be efficient and productive with it.” Five answered, his fingers pinching the skin of his fingers as he watches his every movement, not understanding why he was here in the first place.
“Mm, I like to hear that. You can send him in,” Lance says to his assistant, who quickly nods sending in the man himself, Y/n.
“You summoned me, boss?” He asked, glancing at Five for a quick second as his eyebrows twitch up at the sight of him.
“Yes, I did. Because I have taken it upon myself to assign you two as partners,” he points to both of them.
“What?” “Come again?” The pair say, both now standing as they look at each other.
“With all due respect, sir, I don’t think Five and I would make good partners-“
“That’s exactly the reason I’m doing it. Look,” Y/n and Five both sit back down.
“I know you two don’t like each other that much, maybe even at all, but I’ve seen you, Five, you don’t talk to anyone else in the office. And Y/n, you talk to everyone in this office-in this building really, and you rarely talk to him. I think with this opportunity, you two can actually get along and succeed in working with each other. And, maybe this will take your mind away from the Keeper case,” he says to Five, who leans back into his seat, a deep sigh emitting from him.
Y/n groans quietly, slumping into his chair. Five rolls his eyes at him, making Lance speak up again.
“I’ll make a deal with you two,” they perk up, “solve one case together and maybe I’ll reconsider allowing you two to work separately again, all right?” Y/n looks at Five, who does the same, and they both nod.
“Good, now leave,” the assistant opens the door for the two, allowing(forcing) them to leave.
Y/n sighs, “do you have any open and easy to solve cases?”
“Oh a shit ton, but I’m not gonna let you get in the way of my job,” Five spits, Y/n now looking at him with an unamused face.
“Well, that’s good, because I won’t let you get in the way of mine, either.” With that, the two walk out of the building, heading in separate directions from each other.
• • • • •
Weeks had gone by since then, and they still had not solved one case together. They attempted to lie and have one of them solve a case and the other also have credit, but that ended up backfiring because they didn’t get their processes of working on it completely in sync with one another. There were details either missing or added in each other their reports. Granted the case was solved, but not for their own benefit.
Y/n was starting to grow annoyed, wanting nothing more than to go back to how things were. Where Five was just a simple guy in the office that he would annoy just for the hell of it, and there wouldn’t be any consequences to their work ethic and values.
Later that night, however, Y/n got a call.
“What? What is it?” He answers, groggy from the fact that he just woke up.
“Hey, I need your help,” the person on the other line says, seeming like he struggled to get that out.
“Wha-Five?” He looks over at the clock on the wall, “why the hell are you calling me at 12 in the morning?”
“Just-I need you to help me, okay? My brother’s been kidnapped and…” he sighs, his siblings listening at him talk to the unknown person.
“It would be nice to have some backup,” Y/n grins, already getting up to get dressed.
“Aw, Five, I never knew you had it in you to actually ask for hel-“
“Are you going to or not?”
“Okay, okay, fine, yes, I’ll help, where do you want me to meet you?”
“I think it’ll just be easier if I-“
“YOU’RE NOT DRIVING WANDA!”
“-If we pick you up. Jesus, Diego,” Y/n pulled the phone away from his ear as he heard someone yell, he assumed it was one of the many siblings Five had told him about.
“Okay, I’ll meet you in..five minutes?”
��Make it three.” The phone goes silent as Y/n grabs his gun and his badge, making sure it was loaded before heading down the stairs to his apartment building.
The family picks him up, in what he learned to be Wanda, and they head to the laundry mat.
There, him and Five go in front of the group as they hold their guns and a flashlight in front of them, checking in every area to make sure that they are safe and not at risk of getting hurt.
When they see Viktor, he’s loosely tied to a chair and not even looking as if he’s in pain.
Five helps his brother as Y/n makes sure his gun is still up, making sure Five’s family and him are safe.
A man then appears from the back, shakily holding a gun as he asks for their help.
Y/n eventually drops his hands and puts away his gone when he realizes that the man was asking for help to find his daughter, Jennifer.
After some explaining, Five tells the man that he’ll get her back to him in at least 24 hours.
“Five, what the hell, why are we helping that guy, what if he’s lying? And what the fuck is the ‘Umbrella Academy’?” Y/n had a million thoughts racing through his head after that conversation.
They weren’t stopped, in fact they grew into ones of more confusion as Five responded to him, and his siblings confusion, by holding up a jar of glowing particles.
They all ended up in an asian restaurant, watching the man entertain them with knife tricks.
“So, what? You guys all used to have powers?” Five nods.
“And now you don’t because your dad, who’s an alien, reset the universe and made this timeline?”
“Look, I know it’s hard to understand, and I would prove it to you if I could, but-“
“Well, you can prove it to him, Five, with this!” Ben holds up the Marigold as Five quickly shuts him down.
They all argue and banter as they all, except Ben, agree to not regain their powers.
Ben then heads to the bathroom and Y/n drinks a shot of whatever liquor they had there.
“Look, maybe this can be the case that we solve together? And then you don’t have to see me working with you again, hm?” Five proposes, making Y/n tilt his head to the side, agreeing with him, for once.
Ben returns and they all have shots, including Y/n who was just about to leave.
“Alright, I’m leaving,” Y/n stands up and starts to leave.
Five looks at him and then back at his siblings.
“I’m gonna walk him out,” he follows Y/n, silently walking as they head outside.
“My apartment’s not too far from here, so you don’t have to drive me. But, I’ll, uh, follow up with you tomorrow I guess,” he chuckles, looking at Five for a second longer than he meant to.
“Yeah, I’ll…see you tomorrow,” they stare at each other, their bodies starting to take control as they go closer to one another with each moment of silence.
They step back once they hear the rest of Five’s siblings come outside.
“Uh-bye,” Five rushes off, hopping in the van as he silently curses at himself.
“What are you doing? You hate him…right?” Five thinks, staring at the back of his head.
He watches as the guy he’s started to hate walks away, unknowingly getting wrapped up in whatever crazy family shenanigans are about to happen.
• • • • •
A/n: I kinda fuck with where this is going, so if you guys liked this, let me know!
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animesmolbean · 3 months ago
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Words Hold Power 
An “The Umbrella Academy” fanfiction
Five x Reader
(Male)
Author's Note: Welcome to my The Umbrella Academy fanfiction! I'm so excited to share this story with you all! TUA is my favorite Netflix show! I'm very sad to see it's in its final season, but all great shows come to an end! But at least we'll get to rewatch it over and over again, lol.
Speaking of which, please, no spoilers for S4 since I have not watched it yet. I'll let you guys know where I am in S4 in coming posts.
With that said, I just wanted to tell you guys this. There was one hesitation I had with writing this story. Handling Viktor's character. I know about the journey of this character and Elliot Page's journey as well. I know about the transition, and I wanted to tell you how I planned on approaching this.
I did research on this topic and wanted to be sure I was handling it correctly. I researched how I should write transgender characters and their journeys throughout the story.
I also read other TUA fanfictions for research to see how other authors handle it, and like the research, it's a mixed bag. Some use Viktor only, and some show the name change.
After researching, I decided on an approach.
I will follow what the show does and show the transition story Viktor has. I chose this because I believe it's a beautiful journey, and the show does a great job handling the topic.
One last thing, all the main characters (The Hargreeves siblings) are aged up a little.
With all that said, I hope you enjoy the first chapter! ♥️
~Character Info~
Reader's ability is cursed speech.  She can make anyone do what she says with only a few words.  It's similar to Allison's, except she doesn't need to say certain words first like her, and her ability is much more powerful.  To the point where she has to be extremely careful about what she says.  
(As you can tell, this was inspired by the anime character, Toge Inumaki from Jujutsu Kaisen.)
Chapter 1: We Only See Each Other at Weddings and Funerals (Family Reunion)
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On the twelfth hour of the first day of October 1985, forty-three women around the world gave birth.  
This was unusual only in the fact that none of these women have been pregnant when the day first began.
Sir Reginald Hargreeves, eccentric billionaire and adventurer, resolved to locate and adopt as many of the children as possible.
He got eight of them. 
Many years later, the kids grew up and went on with their lives as adults.  
There was Number One, aka Luther Hargreeves.  Big, strong and was currently on the moon, studying and preparing for whatever his mission was.  
There was Number Two, aka Diego Hargreeves.  Impulsive, brave and works as a vigilante of sorts.  
There was Number Three, aka Allison Hargreeves.  Famous actress who was currently on the red carpet in front of paparazzi.  
There was Number Four, aka Klaus.  A lazy, free-spirited soul who is currently leaving rehab and using the money he got from the rehab to buy drugs.  He ended up in the back of an ambulance.  
And, there was Number Seven, aka Vanya Hargreeves.  She was quiet, timid and was currently leaving the theater after practicing her violin.  
However, their lives would change forever with one broadcast.  
Their father was now dead. 
THE UMBRELLA ACADEMY 
Vanya rode a taxi to her childhood home.  A place she lived for many years.  
The Umbrella Academy.  
A tall condo-like building with a black gate.  
Vanya approached the building and opened the doors, whose windows were decorated by umbrellas.  
The foyer was fancy still.  The middle was open with a chandelier hanging above a small round table in the middle.  Tall, smooth white beams holding the sides which held the second floor.  A staircase that leads to that second floor was behind the small round table.  
It was just as Vayna remembered it.  Every little detail was still there.  
“Hey, Mom.” 
Vanya called to the woman in the living room.  Said woman sat on the sofa in front of the fireplace which currently had a fire going.  She stayed still as she stared into the dancing flames.  
“Mom?”
“Vanya?” 
A familiar voice turned Vanya’s attention elsewhere.  
“You're actually here.” 
She turned and saw her sister, Allison coming down the stairs.  
“Hey, Allison.” 
“Hey sis.” 
Allison now stood before her sister.  She chuckled and brought the other girl into a hug, which Vanya quietly but graciously returned.  
“Ah.  What is she doing here?” 
A new voice spoke through the quiet foyer.
“You don't belong here.  Not after what you did.”
It was Diego.
“You're seriously gonna do this today?” Allison spoke up, her tone telling that she wasn't in the mood for the male's attitude. 
“Way to dress for the occasion, by the way.” She added, mocking Diego’s attire as he ascended the stairs.  He was still in his “hero” gear; knives and everything.
“At least I'm wearing black.” Diego shot back nonchalantly as he turned left on the stairs, disappearing from the girls’ views.  
Vanya, now uncomfortable, spoke up quietly, “You know what?  I- Maybe he's right.  And I shouldn't-”
“Forget about him.” Allison interrupted her.  “I'm glad you're here.” She spoke softly.  Vanya’s lips quirked up a little at Allison's words.  The sisters shared a moment of silence.  
Diego arrived at his late father's room, to see Luther there checking the windows.  He leaned against the doorframe.  
“I can save you some time.  They're all locked.  No forced entry, no sign of struggle.  Nothing out of the ordinary.” 
As he spoke, he walked over to Luther who was also walking towards him.  
“Oh, you got big, Luther.  What's the secret, huh?  Protein shakes?  Low carbs?” Diego asked mockingly.  
“What do you want?”  Luther asked, not wanting to deal with Diego's attitude.  
Diego reached into his pocket and pulled out a few folded pieces of paper, handing them to Luther.  “The autopsy report.” 
After he teasingly tried to pull them away from Luther, the latter brother snatched them out of his hand.  
“And you have this, why?” Luther asked. 
“Well, that's because I… broke into the coroner's office.” Diego explained as he sat down in an armchair.  “And surprise, surprise, Dad's death was… normal.  Just a boring, old heart failure.”
“Yeah, so?” Luther looked at Diego.  
“So, why are you in here, checking all the windows?”
“Were you the first one on the scene?” Luther asked.
“Pogo found him.” Diego answered. 
“Yeah, I talked with Pogo.  He said he couldn't find Dad's monocle.”
“And your point being?” Diego asked in a bored tone.
“Can you think of a single time you saw Dad, and he wasn't wearing that monocle?  No.  Which means someone took it.  Which means there's a chance he wasn't alone when he died.”
Diego sat up from the armchair.  “There is no mystery here.  Nothing to avenge.  Nothing to solve, nothing like that.  It's just a sad old man who kicked it in a big empty house.  Just like he deserved.” 
“You should leave.” Lither spoke, not liking Diego's tone with that last sentence he spoke.  
“Whatever you say, brother.” Diego said in a mocking tone as he turned to leave.  Before he did, he turned back to Luther.  “By the way, did you visit (Your Name) yet?” 
Luther shook his head.  “No.  I was about to, actually.” 
“You know where he is.” Diego simply said.
Vanya entered the living room, looking around at the interior.  She spotted a comic and new articles on their group, The Umbrella Academy.  She looked at the bookshelves and pulled out one book in particular.  
The title read, “Extra Ordinary My Life as Number Seven” 
It was her autobiography book.  The one she wrote when she left the academy. 
She observed it solemnly, until a voice spoke out.
“Welcome home, Ms. Vanya.” 
She turned and saw Pogo, a human sized monkey dressed formally with a cane and glasses.  
Vanya walked over to him and hugged him.  Pogo hugged back with a hum.  “So good to see you.” He noticed the book in her hand.  “Ah, yes, your autobiography.” 
“Do you know, um…” Vanya paused before continuing.  “Did he ever read it?” 
Pogo thought for a moment before replying, “Not that I'm aware of.” 
Vanya turned her attention to the portrait above the fireplace.  It showed a boy, around seventeen in age, sitting with a neutral but sophisticated look on his face.  
“How long has it been since Five disappeared?” She asked.
Pogo turned to look at the portrait too.  “It's been sixteen years, four months, and fourteen days.” The two looked at each other.  “Your father insisted I keep track.” 
“And… how long has (Your Name) been in that coma?” 
“Sixteen years, four months, and six days.” Pogo replied.  
“You wanna know something stupid?  I always used to leave the lights on for him.  I was scared that he would come back, it would be late, and the house would be dark and he wouldn't be able to find us, so he'd leave again.  And he would take (Your Name) with him.  So, every night, I'd make a little snack and make sure all the lights were on.” 
Pogo nodded.  “Oh, I remember your snacks.  I'm pretty sure I stepped in half those peanut butter and marshmallow sandwiches, and those (Favorite type of Cookie) cookies.”  He sighed a couple times before he spoke again, “Your father always believed that Number Five was still out there somewhere.  He also believed that one day (Your Name) would wake up.  He never lost hope.” 
“And look where that got him.” Vanya said solemnly. 
Allison went up to her late father's study, looking around the area.  The familiarity of it brought up a memory.  
〰️
Reginald Hargreeves was working in his office, as usual, when Grace knocked on the door.  She entered before closing the door.
“The children are ready for bed, sir.  They wanted to say goodnight.” 
She turned and walked a couple of paces and opened the sliding door.  
On the other side revealed the eight children, all wearing matching pajamas.  Allison was in the center while the others surrounded her.  Little (Your Name) stood between her and Five, a black cloth face mask covering his mouth and nose.  
The children were all smiling as they waited for their father to acknowledge them.  But he was so into his work that he didn't even glance up at them.  
Sensing the awkwardness, Grace quickly dismissed the kids.  The kids, of course, were disappointed but not surprised.  As they left slowly, (Your Name) tugged on Allison's sleeve, silently asking her to come.  
“I'll be there in a minute (Your Name).” The girl whispered.  (Your Name) tilted his head to the side.  Allison spoke again, “Why don't you go hang out with Five for a bit before bed?  I know you planned on it.” She gave the masked boy a small smile.  (Your Name) felt his cheeks warm up, but he nodded, leaving and quietly walking over to Five.  The boy saw him coming and, with a nod of his head, gestured to him to follow him.  (Your Name) nodded and started to walk beside him.  As he did, he heard Allison, 
“He's always busy.” 
〰️
“Where's the cash, Dad?” 
The sound of a voice diverted Allison's attention and she walked over to her father's desk, hearing clamoring noises.  She leaned forward to look to see who was over there.  
“Klaus?  What are you doing in here?” She asked.  
Said boy looked up and gasped at the sight of his sister.  “Oh!  Allison!  Wow, is that you?” He asked as he stood up.  He embraced her slowly; Allison slowly returned the hug.  “Long time.  Too long.” He pulled away.  “Hey, I was hoping to see you, actually, because I wanted to get your autograph.  Add it to my collection!” He planted his chin onto his hands.  
Allison let her brother act because it was how he always behaved when she noticed the white paper bracelet on his left wrist.  “Just out of rehab?” She asked.
“No, no.  No, no, no, no.  No.  I'm done with all of that.” Klaus replied with a sigh as he removed the bracelet. “I just came down here to prove to myself that the old man was really gone.” He smiled.  “And he is!  He's dead.  Yeah!” He clapped, making Allison smile a little, shaking her head a bit.  
“You know how I know?  Because if he were alive, not one of us would be allowed to set foot in this room.” Allison silently agreed with Klaus.  
“He was always in here, our whole childhood, plotting his next torment, right?” He said with a chuckle as he sat in the armchair behind the desk, putting his feet on the desk.  “Remember how he used to look at us?  That scowl?” He pointed to the man's portrait onto the wall behind him.  “Thank Christ, he's not our real father, so we couldn't inherit those cold, dead eyes!” He stretched his eyelids to show more of his eyeballs.  He fake screams, making Allison chuckle a little as Klaus started to dramatically imitate their late father. 
“Get out of his chair.” 
Klaus turned his head and saw Luther standing by the doorway.  “Oh, wow, Luther!  Wow, you really, uh… You really filled out over the years huh?” Klaus said as he stood and flexed his arm muscles.  
“Klaus.” Luther warned.
“Save the lecture.  I was already leaving.  You guys can talk amongst yourselves.  I am going to visit (Your Name).  Oh!  The precious little brother of ours.” He chuckled softly.  Before he could leave though, Luther stopped him.  “Drop it.”
“Ex-squeeze me?” Klaus said.
“Do it.  Now.” Luther ordered.  
Klaus pulled his arm away from Luther and went back to the desk and started to empty out his pockets, which held a few of his late father's belongings.  “It's just an advance on our inheritance!  That's all it is!” Allison chuckled silently at her brother.  “No need to get your little panties in a bunch.” With that, Klaus left, closing the door; leaving Luther and Allison alone in the room. 
“So, Klaus is still Klaus, in case you are wondering.” Luther started.
“You know, after all these years, I find it strangely comforting.” Allison stated.
“Did you see Diego?” Luther asked.
“With his stupid outfit?” Allison added in amusement. 
“Oh, I know.  Do you think he wears that thing in the bathroom?” Lauther asked.
“Like in the shower?” Allison asked for confirmation. 
“Yeah.” Luther confirmed.
“Yes, absolutely!” Allison laughed.  
The two went on to talk about how their lives are going now that they are adults.  Luther was the only one to stay while the rest went their separate ways.  Their conversation ended talking about Allison's family and her powers.  
〰️
A little later, everyone congregated in the living room.  The fire was still going in the fireplace as everyone sat in silence.  
Luther started talking about doing a memorial service for their late father.  Some like Allison were mostly confused by this, or making fun of it like Klaus.  
“Is that my skirt?” Allison asked, noticing Klaus wearing a skirt now.  
“Oh, yeah this.  I found it in your room.  It's a little dated, I know, but it's very breathy on the bits.”
Luther stopped Klaus before he could go further and started to talk about their father's death.  He had a theory that he didn't die simply of heart failure.  He recounted how he was acting suspicious and requested Klaus to try to communicate with him.  Klaus was not interested.  
“I can't just call Dad into the afterlife and be like, “Dad, could you just stop playing tennis with Hitler for a moment and take a quick call?” 
“Since when?  That's your thing.” Luther said.
“I'm not in the right… frame of mind.” 
“You're high?” Allison asked, not surprised.
“Yeah!  Yeah!” Klaus laughed.  “I mean, how are you not listening to this nonsense?” 
“Well, sober up, this is important.” Luther said.
Klaus only sighed.  
When Luther started talking about the missing monocle, Diego concluded that Luther was suspicious of all of them, saying that Luther thought one of them killed their dad.  This caused everyone to get upset.  Diego insulted Luther's leadership, Klaus got up and jokingly said that he might as well go murder their Mom and (Your Name), unless he was already dead.  Vanya left in silence and. Allison left in silence as well.  Luther tried to defend himself, but it was too late.  
They weren't always like this.  When they were kids, they were tight knit.  
〰️
17 YEARS AGO
“This is Jim Hellerman, reporting live for Channel 2 News outside of the Capital West Bank at Main and Sixth.  A group of heavily armed men stormed the bank not three hours ago and took an unknown number of hostages.” 
The armed men surveyed the bank as they pointed their guns at the bound up hostages and pushed them behind the counter as they proceeded with the robbery.  
Unexpectedly, a girl with curly black hair, in a school uniform and mask, walked casually to one of the robbers.  
It was Allison. 
“Hey, get back with the others.” The robber ordered the girl.  
“I heard a rumor.” Allison spoke. 
“What?  What did you say?” 
Allison leaned forward and used her ability, “I heard a rumor that you shot your friend in the foot.” 
The robber pointed his gun at one of his partners and promptly shot him in the foot, knocking him down.  The hostages screamed at the sound of the gun.  
Suddenly, someone dressed in a boy's school uniform with a mask came crashing down from a window above and landed behind the counter.  It was Luther.  He punched one robber and threw him out the window with surprising strength.  
Then, another kid dressed like Luther came from the other side of the bank.  “Guns are for sissies.  Real men throw knives.” He threw two long knives at one of the robbers only for them to redirect to another robber and immediately killed him. 
There were now only two robbers left in the lobby.  
One of them climbed onto the desk and pointed his gun shakily at the three kids.  “Get back, you freaks.” 
“Hey, be careful up there, buddy.” Diego, the knife throwing kid taunted.
“Get back now!” 
“Wouldn't want you to get hurt.” Allison taunted as well.
“Or what?” 
A fourth kid appeared seemingly out of nowhere, sitting criss cross on the desk.  A taunting smirk on his face.  This was Number Five.  
The robber shot at Five, but he disappeared and reappeared on the other side.  When the robber turned around and tried to shoot him again, he suddenly realized that he was not holding a gun.
“Ooh!  That's one badass stapler!” Five taunted before smacking the guy's hand holding the stapler into his head.  This knocked the robber over.  
All they had to do now was get rid of the robbers in the vault.  
Or so they thought.  
There was one more.  
He loaded his gun and his gun cocked, catching the kids off guard.  
“Down you freaks!” He yelled.  
Suddenly, running from a hidden place behind a wall, was a fifth kid, dressed like the rest of the boys, as he pulled down his face mask.  He directed his attention to the robber.  
“Explode!” 
The single word echoed loudly through the bank, and just before the guy could turn his gun to the boy, his body suddenly exploded, body parts, guts, and blood spreading out everywhere.  The hostages screamed in fear.  The boy quickly covered his face again, breathing heavily as he ran to his siblings.  
He gestured to all of them.  They couldn't see much of his face, but they could tell he was worried by the look in his eyes.  
“We're okay.  Thanks (Your Name).” Allison said.
(Your Name) hummed, nodding as he walked over to behind the desk with the others, while two more kids dressed like the rest of the boys joined them.  Five looked at him.  “That was pretty badass.  Good work.” He complimented, giving him a smile.  (Your Name) felt his cheeks warm up a little, and he tilted his head a bit and closed his eyes.  Most people wouldn't be able to tell his expression behind the mask, but Five knew he was smiling at him in thanks.  
“Do we really have to do this?” A meek voice asked. 
“Come on, Ben.  There's more guys in the vault.” Luther told the boy.
Ben sighed as he walked to the vault door.  “I didn't sign up for this.” 
He entered as the hostages all ran for their lives out of the bank.  Inside the vault, the last of the robbers were eyeing slaughtered by Ben's ability.  He screeched and roared as his tentacles ripped them apart and threw them against the walls.  Blood splattered all over the windows.  
Once it was quiet, Ben came out, covered in blood.  “Can we go home now?” He asked, his breathing shaky.  
It was time to leave.  
The seven kids started walking towards the entrance of the bank. (Your Name) pulled out a small vial and turned the cap.  He pulled the bottom part of his mask up and put the bottle to his lips.  He tilted his head back and started swallowing the liquid.  He finished it and placed the empty bottle back in his pocket.  
“Are you feeling okay?” 
Five's voice made (Your Name) turn to him.  He nodded and hummed in thanks.  Five offered his arm to him.  “Ready?” He asked.  The boy nodded again, and he hooked his arm with Five's.  Five smiled at him, and they started walking after their siblings.  
The seven kids emerged from the back as the news reporters pointed their cameras at the group, and they all clamored to try to talk to them.  
Above on the top of a building nearby, stood Reginald Hargreeves, observing the other kids with a mini telescope. An eighth kid, dressed like Allison, stood next to him.
“Why can't I go play with the others?” The girl asked.  
“We've been through this before, Number Seven.  I'm afraid there's just nothing special about you.” Reginald said as he lowered his telescope.  
The girl looked down.  “Oh.”
Eventually, Reginald came down to stand with the children.  
“Our world is changing.  Has changed.  There are some among us gifted with abilities far beyond the ordinary.  I have adopted seven such children.” 
‘You mean eight.’ (Your Name) thought to himself as he looked down temporarily, his arm still linked with Five's.  
“I give you the inaugural class of the Umbrella Academy.” 
Many news reporters asked many questions.
“What happened to their parents?” One asked.
“They were suitably compensated.” Reginald replied.  
“Are you concerned about the welfare of the children?” Another asked.  
“Of course.  As I am for the fate of the world.” Reginald said.  
〰️
Everyone was in separate rooms, having their alone time after the little dispute from earlier.  Klaus was still in the living room, trying to talk to their late father, but he ended up knocking the vase filled with his ashes over.  
Luther was walking through the hallways, reminiscing until he got to his room.  
Allison was looking through her belongings until she found a gold heart locket with ‘A+L’ carved onto the front.  
Klaus took the vase into the kitchen where he proceeded to take more pills.  
Diego laid on the couch in the living room, playing with one of his knives.
Vanya sat on the stairs, a solemn look on her face.
Luther eventually found a familiar record and played it on the record player.  
“I Think We're Alone Now” by Tiffany started to play.  
Everyone heard the familiar tune all throughout the house and they all started to dance in their respective rooms.  
Childhood nostalgia ran through their bodies as they all danced like no one was watching.  Even Pogo moved a little to the beat.  
But suddenly, thunder rumbled and lightning flashed.  
The music stopped as the house reacted to the violent disturbance.  
The siblings all ran to the courtyard and saw a giant hole, surrounded by blue lightning.  
“What is it?” Vanya asked.
“Don't get too close!” Allison warned.  
“Yeah, no shit.” Diego said.
“Looks like some sort of temporal anomaly.  Either that or a miniature black hole.  One of the two. 
“Pretty big difference there, Paul Bunyan.” Diego insulted.
“Out of the way!” Klaus exclaimed as he came out with a fire extinguisher and tried to spray it but it was out of steam.  So, he just threw it at the mysterious anomaly only for it to get sucked in.  
“What is that gonna do?” Allison asked.
“I don't know.  Do you have a better idea?” Klaus asked.  
The anomaly got stronger and Luther ushered everyone behind him to protect them.  Klaus wanted to run.  Luther and Allison held hands.  
The electrical crackling intensified and someone emerged from the anomaly, arms out.  It disappeared and the person fell out of the sky and landed on the ground.  The sky cleared up as the siblings walked towards the person, who stood up.  He was dressed in a suit way too big for him. 
“Does anyone else see little Number Five, or is that just me?” Klaus asked. 
The boy known as Five looked at himself then back at the siblings.  
“Shit.” 
The six were now in the kitchen.  Five was busy making a sandwich while the others watched in shock.  
“What's the date?  The exact date.” Five asked.  
“The 24th.” Vanya replied. 
“Of what?”
“March.” 
“Good.” 
Luther spoke up.  “So, are we gonna talk about what just happened?” 
Five didn't reply.  He just continued with making his sandwich.  
Silence fell for a couple seconds until Luther stood up.  “It's been seventeen years.” 
Five scoffed.  “It's been a lot longer than that.” He blinked over to the cabinet. 
“I haven't missed that.” Luther muttered.  
“Where'd you go?” Diego asked.
“The future.  It's shit, by the way.” Five replied as he blinked back to the table.  
“Called it.” Klaus said.  
“I should've listened to the old man.  You know, jumping through space is one thing, jumping through time is a toss of the dice.” Five looked up at the siblings.  “Nice dress.” He told Klaus. 
“Oh, well, danke!” Klaus said, playing with the article of clothing.  
“Wait, how did you get back?” Vanya asked.
“In the end I had to project my consciousness forward into a suspended quantum state version of myself that exists across every possible instance of time.” Five explained.  
“That makes no sense.” Diego spoke up.
“Well, it would if you were smarter.” Five sasses.
Diego stood up to confront the boy, but Luther stopped him, holding him back.
“How long were you there?” He asked.
“Forty-one years.  Give or take.” 
Luther and Diego sat back down.  “So what are you saying?  That you're fifty-eight?” The former asked.
Five looked at Luther.  “No, my consciousness is fifty-eight.” He finished his sandwich.  “Apparently, my body is now seventeen again.” 
“Wait, how does that even work?” Vanya asked.
“Delores kept saying the equations were off.  Eh.” Five took a bite out of his sandwich.  “Bet she's laughing now.” 
Vanya was confused.  “Delores?” 
Five ignored her and looked at the newspaper that told him about Reginald Hargreeves’ death.  “Guess I missed the funeral.”
“How'd you know about that?” Luther asked.
“What part of the future do you not understand?” Five asked.  “Heart failure, huh?” 
“Yeah.” “No.” Diego and Luther said together.
Five hummed before clicking his tongue.  “Nice to see nothing's changed.”  Then, he got a good look at his siblings again.  He realized that one was missing.  “By the way, where's (Your Name)?”
The other five siblings looked at each other, solemn expressions on their faces now.  “Well…” Vanya started.  “There isn't an easy way to say this.” Allison said.  “He's in a coma.” “He's dead.” Klaus and Diego finished.  “Diego!” Allison scolded. 
Five looked at his siblings, a subtle look of worry on his face, but on the inside, his heart was beating faster.  “What happened?” 
“Well…. like I said… this isn't easy to say.” As Allison tried to explain, they suddenly heard soft footsteps approaching the kitchen.  They slowly turned their heads and what they saw shook them to the core. 
There stood…
(Your Name).
Klaus yelled in surprise.  
“Holy shit.” Diego said. 
Everyone else looked in surprise.  
(Your Name) was alive.
115 notes · View notes
xmalereader · 11 months ago
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Five Hargreeves x Chef! Male Reader
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☆ — MASTERLIST — ☆
SUMMARY: After the events of TUA S3, Fives is left without his powers and can finally try to have a normal life without relying on his abilities. Trapped in a his teenage body at the age of fifty he can finally retire at a nice little town, getting himself a job as a waiter in the towns famous ‘Daybreak Diner’ where he befriends the owner and chef of the place. Not only that, but Fives has competition with the bakery across the street.
CONTENT/WARNINGS: Pure fluff, mature language, crossovers between characters, and bakery verse, reader is a chef and an adult, fives is around 15-16 years old, platonic parent, found family, fives and Alex are enemies to lovers, mentions of Simon Riley and his baker husband, cooking, fives hates customers, love sick teenagers.
WC: 1.5K
NOTES: Hello everyone! It’s a new year, meaning new format and new characters and ideas! I’ve actually been thinking about this idea for awhile now and decided to create my own little baker or cooking verse between one of my favorite series of Simon Riley and perhaps a new one starting with Five Hargreeves! Please, feel free to leave some feedback and if you wish to read some more of this cooking verse then I’ll be more than happy to make more!
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Daybreaks Diner was a simple restaurant that served grilled and raw sea food dishes. It was one of the popular places in town that many people went to eat after leaving work either to relax with some alcohol in their system or perhaps a nice shrimp cocktail that many people enjoyed. The place had only been standing for a few years, owned by one single person who did all of the cooking and cleaning before and after closing for the day, everyone in town knew who the chef was and how passionate he is when it comes towards his menu and various food choices.
Some would say that he was in competition with the bakery across the street due to both owners always getting caught conversing with each other, only for the rumor to be shut down after it became clear the the two were simply friends and helped each other out when it comes towards new ideas for their own places.
It wasn’t until their time together slowly decreased going from days to only a few hours. Only to find out that his good friend had recently found someone that helped him in the bakery which later resulted in them getting married and getting the family he always wanted and keeping himself busy in the bakery. The two still talked, but they were both moving on with their lives and busy with their own dreams.
It wasn’t until a year later that he hired a sixteen year old teenager to work in his diner. He was hesitant about the kid at first only to find out that he no place nor a job and was easily persuaded into hiring the kid and evening letting the kid rent out his extra room upstairs. It took some adjusting for him, waking up in the mornings to find the teenager with messy bed hair and drinking black coffee on the small table that he had in his dining room, silent as always only to get a bit chatty when the two head downstairs to prep for the day.
The other strange thing that he hasn’t gotten used to yet was the kids name, Fives.
Did this kids parents hate him so much that they gave him a number for a name?
Fives never spoke about his past nor about his family and kept to himself. That wasn’t until he caught the kid having a nightmare late one night, jolting him awake when hearing the kids scream which caused him to spend the night sleeping on the floor after the kid asked him to stay with him even though his words sounded forced as if he didn’t want him there at all. Y/n didn’t know shit about kids nor did he consider himself a parent since he’s been alone for majority of his adult life to the point where his main focus became his restaurant and now this kid too.
After having Fives live with him for almost six months now, the teenager had grown on him and enjoyed his presence even though the kid himself can be a little sarcastic bastard whenever they were alone.
It was the weekend and the restaurant usually opens late, giving Y/n the time to get everything prepped without any problems as he stood on the other side of the counter, cutting up various vegetables while glancing over to Five who had his face pressed against the glass window, staring across the street with a frown on his face.
“If you keep staring they’ll notice.” He speaks up but Fives doesn’t budge from his spot, glaring down at Alex from across the street at the other teenager worked on writing out todays specials for his fathers bakery. “He thinks some piece of bread with white crap on top is better than my specials?” Fives hissed out, earning an eye roll from Y/n.
When Y/n first introduced Fives to his friend he expected his friends son, Alex to get along only to get the total opposite. Fives loathed the guy and Alex felt the same way towards him. Their hatred started over who’s food was better either the bakery or the diner and neither saw eye to eye and the boys always turned everything into a competition.
“There chocolate filled croissants are good—“
Fives whips his head to glare at Y/n when hearing his comment. He can’t help but laugh at his expression and shake his head, he used to find the kid so intimidating at times and now his looks never phase him anymore. “You two are always fighting.” He mumbled to himself and focused on the fish next and moves around the counter and placed the different ingredients out in order to get lunch ready.
“Come on Fives, clean the tables and set down the chairs the lunch rush is gonna hit soon.” He orders the kid around who does as he’s told, walking around the counter to put on his own apron and tying it around his waist and grabbing a table cloth. It became a regular routine for the two, Y/n prepping the food while Fives cleans the place and gets the tables set for any customer that are to come even though Fives was the only waiter he did the work fast and wasn’t afraid of taking back to customers who talked badly about the food or complained about the smallest things, remembering him threatening a family who couldn’t control their kids running around the place and ruining other people’s nights.
Fives didn’t hesitate to approach the table, slamming the bill on their counter while giving them a wide grin. “If you don’t control your kids I am more than happy to do it for you and believe me it ain’t gonna be a pretty sight.” The parents thought he was joking around and laughed at Fives words only for Y/n to wince at the couples response, knowing damn well that he wasn’t joking.
Fives sighed through his nose before slamming his hand on the table, startling not just the couple but the other customers around them while speaking out loud to them. “Listen here ass, I have spent the last five minutes dealing with your kids running around this place while serving food to everyone else and I am caring around hot and cold plates and if one of your kids bumps into me and gets that food on them, do not complain about your little mistake getting burned.”
Safe to say the parents listened to him and were able to control their kids.
Y/n relied on Fives with situations like that which rarely happened after that day, no one wanted to deal with the teens wrath.
As the two got ready, Fives was the one to turn on the ‘open’ sign on and step outside to wipe down the windows, using a rag to wipe them clean only to stop when he noticed Alex approaching him, making him glare as he focused on his task.
“I’d ask what you’re up to Fives, but then it occurred to me. I don’t care.” Said Alex while entering the resturant, leaving Fives outside who glared at Alex when entering the place, getting Y/n’s attention from over the counter and smiling at the other teen. “Alex! The usual today?” He questions as he began to get the food ready as Alex sits at the bar.
“The usual for dad and for Simon he actually wanted to try one of your specials.” Alex points towards the menu behind Y/n and let him know that Simon wishes to try the third special on the menu.
Y/n works on getting the food ready. “Why do you call him Simon? Why not dad too?” He knows that his friend and his husband have been married for awhile which lead up to Simon finally adopting Alex as his own kid too. “I guess I’m used to it yet?” Alex shrugs his shoulders while leaning his elbows on the counter top and reaching over to steal one of the juice boxes only to get his hand smacked with a towel making him yelp in surprise.
“Hey, thats for customers only.” Fives cuts in, tossing his dirty towel into the sink while Alex grumbled. “I’m a valuable customer here.”
“To me you ain’t, so if you want the juice box you gotta pay.” The two boys glare at each other and Y/n is quick to cut the tension between the two. “Alright that’s enough you two.” He sets a bag of food in front of Alex, “Here you go, also tell your dad to send me some those specials too.”
“I will,” Alex responds while taking the bag with him, shooting Fives a smirk when Y/n slips the juice box in the bag which makes Fives groan as the two watch him leave the restaurant. It was normal for both owners to try each others specials without charge due to them being close friends after so many years together.
Y/n watched Alex, making sure that he got back to the bakery without any accidents, sighing in relief once the teen makes it inside only to turn around to face Fives who had his arms crossed over his chest while frowning. “Do you want me to kill him?”
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desperate-daydream · 1 year ago
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I LOVE YOUR WORKS SO MUCHHH!!!! Could you please make a headcannon or short story of Five having a husband who's more chaotic than Klaus? Or a shy husband but more deadly than Five?
☂️Umbrella Academy
❀ five hargreeves x male (chaotic husband) reader ⚣
A/N: thank you so much!! I’m glad that you like reading what my crazy brain creates. XD. alright, I hope you like this one.
tags/warnings: you‘re five‘s husband, you and klaus are the chaos duo
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(headcanons)
so, yeah, you‘re sometimes even more chaotic than klaus
five still can‘t believe how he fell for you
well, actually, you were the one to fall at your first meeting
like literally. you fell into his arms even
he caught you and you had looked up into the most handsome face you‘ve ever seen (and that cute little frown)
that wasn‘t the last time you fell and he had to catch you
when you walked somewhere you either jumped or ran around or you were walking on top of a wall
it seems like there is nothing to stop you from your antics
get up in the middle of the night to go swimming? okay
steal a little something from that ignorant asshole that had insulted you mere moments ago? why not?
bring home any pet you find on the streets and convince five to let it stay for a while? definitely
start singing and dancing out of nowhere, wherever you are? always
five will never admit it, but you manage more often than not to convince him to help you with your crazy ideas
he will say it‘s because he has to make sure you don‘t accidentally kill yourself
but he‘s mostly just deeply in love with you
he would do anything for his husband
he‘s killed for you before and he‘d do it again
everything to see his precious chaotic husband happy
but he also saw his life flash before his eyes when you and klaus met
he literally went and got a knife to carry around at all times in case you two got into serious trouble
another thing he would never admit is that klaus was probably his favorite sibling
apparently he had a lot of sympathy or whatever for the chaotic ones
okay so, the next thing he knows he finds klaus and you laying half naked in the living room
and somehow you two had found a stray kitten again and brought it back with you
together with at least ten bags full. of. clothes.
he made his way through the bags while purposely avoiding the cat that followed him with its gaze
then he slowly shook you awake
“(y/n)“, he sighed, “..love, wake up.“
you grumbled and slowly opened your eyes
a smile formed on your face when you saw that it was your husband and you reached out your arms towards him
he sighed again but let you pull him in to cuddle
you snuggled closer but five wouldn’t let you fall asleep again, he sat up and pulled you into his lap
you took the chance to kiss him
as much as he loved kissing you your husband pulled away after a few moments
“brush your teeth“
you let out an annoyed whine and pinched his cheek
“okay, can we talk about the cat now?“
five gestured to the creature that had approached them
you bent down to pick it up and the kitten started purring while it snuggled against your chest
„Can we keep it? Pleeeeease“, you put on your best pout combined with big pleading eyes, „for just a few days?“
five sighed another time, he knew he couldn‘t resist you
he nodded and you cuddled closer to him together with the kitten
yeah, five really loved his chaotic husband
so much that he let you get through with most of your crazy ideas
in the end your chaos brightened up his days much more than anything else
424 notes · View notes
kadentherabbit · 11 months ago
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Five Hargreeves blabs!
(I haven’t watch TUA besides season 1)
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(Dating! SFW! Includes like hickeys n stuff)
Hargreeves!Reader ⬇️
Five’s love language is buying you stuff. Clothes, jewelry, shoes, he will buy you absolutely anything. Even spying in on your conversations so he can come up with random gifts.
You two aren’t dating unless he wants you two to be dating. It’s nothing like being FWB, he just absolutely hates labels. If someone else talks to you with even a hint of being nice, he’ll lose his shit, you’re his partner.
He loves hickeys, giving and receiving. He finds it adorable. Leaving marks all over you and you leaving marks all over him. A lot of the time, he only lets you give him hickeys if he doesn’t have any work the next day.
Five isn’t a big PDA fan besides holding hands. He doesn’t like the idea of people thinking he’s some sweet mushy guy, You’d be lucky if he called you a pet name in-front of any of his siblings.
Five is definitely a big cooking guy, just for you, he could probably cook you any meal. Even nuggets and fries if you really wanted him to. He’d definitely wear a “Kiss the cook” apron.
Lets you draw on him if you really wanted to. Absolutely anything, he’d let you draw on him with anything but sharpie. I mean, he’s a busy man. Saving the world and shit.
He’d only stop his studies to cuddle with you, food, nah, sleep, nah but you? Absolutely, he’d be an asshole about cuddling but he would actually love cuddling with you, and if you play with his hair, he will be out within seconds.
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moonyswoony · 3 months ago
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Lost and found
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Pairing: Five hargreeves x reader
Summary: You an Five discover more than just plants and strawberries in the greenhouse
Warning(s): kissing, fluff, nothing really
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“What the hell is this place?” Five muttered, his voice tinged with suspicion.
“Beats me,” you replied, stepping further inside. “But it’s not like we’ve stumbled upon a better place than this one so far.”
The two of you had been on the run for what felt like an eternity. Your attempt to figure out the subway had gone sideways—again—and now you were stuck in this strange, green timeline with no clear path back.
Five stayed close as you ventured deeper into the greenhouse, his sharp eyes scanning every inch. “This doesn’t make sense. None of this should be here.”
You brushed your fingers against a nearby vine, feeling the life pulsing through it. “Maybe this is just a small piece of the world that refused to die.”
Five huffed, the ghost of a smile on his lips. “That, or we’ve stumbled into some kind of twisted fairytale.”
“Great. Does that make you the grumpy old troll under the bridge?” you teased.
“If I’m the troll, that makes you the annoying adventurer who won’t stop asking questions,” he shot back, though his tone was more fond than bitter.
As you explored, you found yourself drawn to a patch of strawberries growing along the far wall. They were perfectly ripe, a vibrant red that stood out against the greens and browns around them. Without thinking, you plucked one and popped it into your mouth, savoring the sweetness.
Five watched with raised eyebrows. “You sure that’s safe?”
“If it’s not, at least I’ll go out with a decent meal,” you replied, plucking another and offering it to him.
He hesitated, then took it, biting into the fruit with a thoughtful expression. “Not bad.”
“High praise from you,” you quipped.
There was a brief, comfortable silence as you both absorbed the strange beauty of this place. The tension that had been winding tighter and tighter over the past few days—or even years—slowly began to ease, the peacefulness of this place working its way into your entire being.
As you wandered deeper, you came across a patch of wildflowers bathed in golden sunlight. You knelt to touch them, their delicate petals soft under your fingers. “This feels like a dream,” you murmured.
“Or a trap,” Five countered, though his voice lacked its usual edge.
You looked up at him, catching an unguarded expression in his eyes,something softer, more vulnerable than you were used to seeing. ��Five?”
He stepped closer, the sunlight casting a warm glow across his features. “You’ve always been fearless,” he chuckled,though his voice was quieter than usual.
You blinked in surprise. “What are you talking about? I’m not fearless, I’m—”
“You are,” he insisted. “And I should have told you sooner.”
“Five…”
“I’ve spent so much time trying to fix everything, trying to keep us all alive, that I forgot there are things I want, too,” he said, his gaze pined on you.
His words hit you like a punch to the gut as you realised what he was implying—not in a painful way, but in a way that left you breathless. You had always known there was something between you, a connection that went deeper than partnership or friendship, but his words still had that affect on you.
Without giving yourself time to overthink it, you reached up and pulled him into a kiss. It wasn’t rushed or frantic, but slow and deliberate, a promise in every brush of your lips against his. Five responded in kind, one hand slipping around your waist while the other cupped the back of your neck, holding you close.
The kiss deepened, his tongue teasing your lower lip before slipping into your mouth. You felt your knees weaken as a wave of heat washed over you, your fingers gripping the front of his shirt as if to support yourself. His hand slid down your back, pulling you flush against him as the kiss grew more intense, more desperate.
It was a kiss that spoke of everything you had both been holding back,years of unspoken feelings, of missed opportunities, all coming to the surface in this one, perfect moment.
When you finally broke apart, both of you were breathing hard, your foreheads resting against each other as you tried to catch your breath.
“I love you,” he said, his voice rough but certain.
You smiled, your thumb brushing against his jaw. “I love you too.”
For a moment, you both stood there in silence, the reality of what you had just confessed settling over you like a warm blanket. The world around you didn’t feel as interesting anymore, not when he was in front of you.
Five glanced around at the greenery, his expression contemplative. “You know, we don’t have to leave right away.”
You raised an eyebrow. “You want to stay?”
“Just for a little while,” he admitted, surprising you with the softness in his voice. “It’s been a long time since we’ve had a moment of peace. We could use the rest and some proper food.”
You looked around at the lush greenery, the golden sunlight filtering through the broken skylight, and felt a sense of calm settle over you. “Yeah,” you agreed, smiling up at him. “Let’s stay.”
With that decision made, the tension that had been a constant companion began to melt away. You found a spot to sit, leaning against a wall covered in ivy, and Five joined you, his hand finding yours and holding it tightly.
For the first time in what felt like forever, you let yourself relax. No missions, no timelines, no disasters—just the two of you, in a place that felt almost unreal.
Five squeezed your hand, drawing your attention back to him. “You know,” he said, his voice low and teasing, “if we’re staying here, we might as well make the most of it.”
You grinned, leaning in to kiss him again, this time slower, savoring every second. “I couldn’t agree more.”
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mattykay · 9 months ago
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His Man - Five Hargreeves x FTM Reader
NSFW!
Reader is post top surgery and pre bottom surgery
contains: top!five, bottom!reader, pussy eating, light age gap (not said), praise, light degrading, Five being sweet, out of character???
-
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You were fresh out the shower, towel around your waist with your hair still damp. You were greeted by your lover with a grin.
"Oh look at my handsome man," Five said as he looked you up and down. He was quick to leave his place at the sink to wrap his arms around your waist and kiss the spot where your jaw and neck met.
"Fiveeee..!" You attempted to protest but your words fell of deaf ears and were brushed off with the 'tsk' of Fives tongue. "C'mon dearest.. how am I supposed to resist you with these perfect scars?" He cooed to you in that goddamn voice that got you weak every time. You felt his roughened finger tips trace your scars with sincerity. You never understood his obsession with your newly flat chest but there was no use fighting him.
He kissed your neck sweetly, teeth catching lightly and soaking in every shudder your body made. Fives hands made their way to your towel, removing it from your waist with the light tug of his finger. Next thing you knew he was on his knees.
"Five-"
"Shh.. shh.. sweet boy. No need." He said as his hands traced over your slit. "Look at my darling and his pretty little pussy.." He said, sounding like a starved man. You felt yourself tighten around nothing. You knew he'd eat you like a starved man too, and he did.
He soon enough had you shaking under the strong blows his tongue made on your clit. You had to grab onto the bathrooms counter to keep yourself upright.
"Like a candy.." He purred into your core, sending vibrations through it that made your back arch. You were breathing heavier and heavier. "Five.. shit.."
"I know.." He spoke into your pussy. "Doin' s'good.." You couldn't handle the way your drooling pussy made his words slur. You truly couldn't. "Prettiest little slut I've ever seen.." Five slurred again, you tried to sit on the counter but he held you too tight.
A few more flicks of his tongue and you came, letting cum squirt over the light hook of his nose and his lips.
He stood up and wiped his face and your now dripping pussy with a towel. "You're the best thing I've ever tasted," Five said with a gentle kiss to your temple. "My handsome, handsome man."
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This is short but I hope y'all like it. Check my requests post to see if they're open, or just drop one in and I'll answer when I have time!
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fruityfics · 5 months ago
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~Blog Introduction~
Hi, I’m Felix (he/him) and this is my gayass fanfic blog🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️
Im mainly known on here for my other blogs: felix-floyd, lucifers-slutty-waist, bulletsforyourtrain, and geefrankieroway.
I’m a 20 year old trans man who loves reading fanfics, but hate that all the male ones are x fem!reader, and I’m sure I’m not the only one. So I’m dedicating this blog to writing fanfics that are x male!reader, x transmasc!reader, x male!oc, male character x male character, etc.
I can do SFW or NSFW
And I am planning on taking requests eventually!!
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People/characters I plan on writing for:
Hazbin Hotel/Helluva Boss:
~ Lucifer
~ Alastor
~ Vox
~ Angel Dust
~ Husk
Game Grumps/NSP:
~ Dan Avidan
~ Danny Sexbang
~ Alex Taylor
~ Arin Hansen
~ Ryland Tate
~ Ninja Brian
~ Ryan Magee
~ TWRP members
My Chemical Romance:
~ Gerard Way
~ Frank Iero
~ Mikey Way
~ Ray Toro
~ Party Poison
~ Fun Ghoul
~ Kobra Kid
~ Jet Star
Bullet Train:
~ Tangerine
~ Ladybug
~ Lemon
Umbrella Academy:
~ Klaus
~ Five
~ Diego
~ Viktor
~ Hazel
Other:
- Markiplier
~ Jeremy Jordan
~ Jack Kelly
~ Luigi (Mario movie version💚)
~ Bowser (also Mario movie)
~ Deadpool
- Beetlejuice
- Link
- Revali
~ Dylan Fuentes (Deadrising 3, look him up I love him)
~ And more if I feel like it🙃
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Of course, a lot of these would be upon request and I could do more in those fandoms if requested, or even other fandoms if I know them. I wanna do a little bit of everything so everyone has a place to go for good mlm fanfics and not be triggered reading she/her pronouns when reading x readers <3 <3 <3
Stay tuned for the fics!
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kaybreezy3000 · 9 months ago
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Master Post-Five Hargreeves Stuff
I like to write, and I hope there's a little something on here for everyone to enjoy. Short one-shots, the occasional requests if I get them, long novel length stories- Pairings, no pairings, various rating options-all clearly marked so stay away from stuff you don't like please or find the versions I have on A03 that allow you to skip explicit material.
This is a full list with links for my stories and some of my art featuring Number Five (TUA). For direct Tumblr posts for art and stories, hit here.
⚠️Since this came up for me: Please do not repost, translate, or reproduce my works in any format to other sites or this one. REBLOGS ARE THE WAY TO GO, AND I ADORE ALL OF YOU THAT ARE KIND ENOUGH TO HIT THAT BUTTON AND HELP ME GET MY WORK OUT THERE FOR OTHERS TO FIND. ❤️
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Inside of You
5714 words. Rated Mature for sexually explicit content, so stay away if that isn't your jam.
While joining Five for family night at his brother's house, he treats you to much more than you expected of your evening, ending the night by leaving you feeling more loved than you ever thought was possible.
Warnings and simple more summary: Smutty smut, Cockwarming, Dom Five, cocky Five and sweet vulnerable Five, s4 setting-assuming that all that sort of went down only with a twist in brief mention that Five in the end saved the day (because he's the man of course and I can't do it any other way, also Lila and Five never got stuck in the subway-so no worries on triggers for that-pretending that didn't happen, this one's all about you and Five 😉
The Boy
Created for an Anon request (rated mature for explicit sexual content)
Warnings: 18-yr old Five, Lots of Smut, Five being soft and also not, CIA setting but with none of the other things happening from season 4
Anonymous asked:
will you do one or just some scenes with Five being soft with a girl he's falling for? Like first kiss stuff or other more intimate things between them? Or any stuff with him letting his guard down for someone for the first time- not with Lila please. Explicit or not explicit. Anything like this. Ty:⁠-⁠*
Note~This quarter end treat is broken into 5 parts of smutty progression-Your Welcome😂 (18193 words)
Please Hold me
~A one-shot reader request, rated General, 5780 words, This one for the sake of being different is Season 3 Five and his family, Mega Whump with no warnings other than panic attacks and traumatic flashbacks of the apocalypse
Summary: Set at the beginning of season 3, the pain that had been inflicted on Five mentally and physically up until this point comes to a head. Little did Five know, when the truth comes out and he finally breaks, he is going to get the love and support he was dying for all along.
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Amor Fati ~ A Five Hargreeves Sad, Soft, and Arousing Season 4, ABC’s Headcannon Story
(Five X Female reader insert, rated E for sexually Explicit content-see above or full story on A03 here. Originally done as another headcanon request but this one is a full story too.)
Broken but breathing. Longing for something that always felt just out of his reach, Five was not okay.
With fates forever intertwined, a train, and a smile he would never forget, once again, the impossible became his reality, but like always, not without tragedy.
In the end, all that mattered are the people Five loved. For them, he would do anything.
(Warnings and Tags: Rated R for sexually explicit content, Hurt Number Five, Alternate S4, Whump, Mental Break Down, Self-Doubt, Angst-humor-love, Uncle Five, The Deli Fives, Starts with Five in a very dark place, Not the end the show gave us.)
Worlds Collide -Five Hargreeves X 6 separate Female reader inserts
A steaming hot and humorous deli Five story, and An Ode To All The Fives We’ve Loved Before.
Written by: @badkitty3000 and me, @kaybreezy3000
(Rated Mature for Sexually Explicit Content, 6976 words)
Note: All six reader inserts in this one were inspired by characters we wrote in our other stories about Five. But if you haven't read any of these stories, you can still easily enjoy this one. If you find that you want a little more of Five and any one of these lovelies, links will be provided at the end.
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Looking for Happy
Hilariously simple but true summary: Five Hargreeves is sad and horny, and all he wants is you. (Don't worry, I will take you a little emotional rollercoaster that's not all the dirty-dirty 😂👍)
(Reader is post-top surgery and pre-bottom surgery.)
(Rated E for explicit sexual content. 18900k words. Anon request for a Five X male or Five X ftm pairing.)
Content Warnings and additional tags: Dom Five and some Sub Five, small 'Scream' movie add in per anon's personal love of the movie with sexy Billy and Stu, light praise kink, daddy kink, rough sex, choking, spanking, public sex, Five being sweet, Five being a cocky jerk, masturbation mentions, flirting)
NOTE: This story takes place during season four and after it, using a series of flashbacks, so it moves between past and present several times. Also, this was obviously written before season 4 came out, with an alternate season 4 ending written my way. It has lots of season 4 trailer and interview mentions to make it more fun and hopefully tie in a little with the real season 4.
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Five Hargreeves Dirty Headcanon ABC's
(Rated M for sexually explicit content, 5438 words, the last one for Z is sort of a mini story for you to enjoy. This list explores Five and his relationship with 'you' while taking a small dive into his very complicated psyche and looking at some of the reasons why he is the way he is. This is written with 'you' as anyone-not male or female specific.)
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He Who Holds The Power~(rated Teen and Up or General) (10,409 words)(alt season 4 story with ending)(Not a Romance- reader insert style that lets anyone be the 'you' character) (original Five cover art painting made by me and a little photoshop story insert to make it more fun)(real friendship and healing)
This one is a little season 4 teaser short story I dreamed up that gives us a look inside Five's world both before he jumped to the apocalypse and post season 3.
~~~~~~~~It all begins and ends with Five....
warnings: mild description/mention of child abuse, and signs of panic attack, potential trigger by mention of bombing a building
tags: not romance, whump, fluff, trauma, heartbreak, love, revenge, forgiveness, Mr. Pennycrumb, all the Hargreeves and some of our new character mentions from season 4, Five deserves better, Klaus is awesome, You x Five, reader insert, Five is amazing and with this one you get to imagine yourself a part of his story/future be it as a friend or whatever you want to imagine👍
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Under Your Hat~ (rated M/Explicit for sexual content but you can still read this and enjoy it by skipping those parts using the ⚠️ symbol in the story for start and stop points.) (9827 words)
You never know what kind of trouble you might find if you put yourself out there and speak your mind, and tonight, that kind of trouble is Five Hargreeves.
~Set post season three. (the 5ish years later thing) Five is older, but still struggling with life and you happen to find yourself at a party with him.
Warnings: explicit sexual content, rough sex, spanking, daddy kink, humiliation play, and Five pretty much being the sweet and sexy guy I like to think he is under that hat.
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'Hargreeves Home for Wayward Boys ~(rated G since you can easily skip the sexually explicit parts and still enjoy the story. There is a clear point to stop if you are avoiding that stuff 👍) (8711 words)
~Five is your employer and he's not happy with you. As the night unfolds, you have a very unexpected encounter with him...
~This story takes place where we left off with season three, but 5 years later. The name is a nod to hints of what might be coming, though I doubt the Netflix writers are going with my little storyline I have created for you.
~This one is sort of gift to all fanfiction readers and writers. May you always keep passwords on our documents and devices, or maybe not... 😂👌
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'Free at Last' - a short, general rated, image based/comic book style story blip of Dolores and Five
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‘Bad Things’
Five Hargreeves/Reader Insert (rated explicit for sexual content)(Dark and very messed up version of Five mixed with some ideas from the comic books, submissive Five, mental issues, making huge mistakes and overcoming past trauma,)(see story for specific tags) (49,996 words)
Summary:
~Psychopathy is a neuropsychiatric disorder marked by deficient emotional responses, lack of empathy, the inability to distinguish between right and wrong, poor behavioral controls, and behaviors that contradict social norms which then commonly result in persistent antisocial deviance and criminal behavior. Enter, Five Hargreeves, everyone's favorite little psycho. Having been left in a new world with nothing, his mental state growing more and more dangerous, Five Hargreeves finds something he feels will keep him from going off the deep end, but just like in so many things he thinks that are wrong, the fact that he thinks this already proves he has.
Full Summary and Chapter One and Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five, Six, and Seven
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‘The Anti Hero’s Pitfall of Arrogance’
Five Hargeeves/Female OC (rated explicit for sexual content-see AO3 version for the Teen and up version)(starts when the Hargreeves are sixteen so that changes the timeline from the show a bit, but it still follows cannon material fairly closely)(see story for specific tags) (44,599 words)
Chapter One and Two
Chapter Three and Four
Chapter Five, Six, and Seven
AO3 Teen and up Version
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‘In The Flesh’
Five Hargreeves/Reader Insert (rated G) (5337 words) (special request based off an extended scene from 'The Anti Hero’s Pitfall of Arrogance.’)(meant to be dark and very disturbing but with a heart filled message that is very Five. )
Link to 'In The Flesh’
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'The Devil Within’
Five Hargreeves/Reader Insert (rated explicit for sexual content) (This one is the smuttiest Five fiction I have ever written so there is no way to avoid those parts) (see story for specific tags but I leave many off to keep you surprised as you read) (23,134 words)
Chapter One and Two
Chapters Three and Four
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Paramour (The Umbrella Academy 3-part series)-Rated Teen because you can skip the many sexually explicit parts or potential triggers with chapter warnings and detailed end notes for what you missed in those parts. It's a love story but about 85% or more of this story is really about healing and focuses on Five but features a lot of all the Hargreeves and even the Sparrows in part 2 and 3.
-If you love Five and long rollercoaster ride stories that you can get lost in than this is a great read for you.
Five’s POV and centered on him, but it has all the Hargreeves and Female OC love interest, stays very true to cannon themes and for Character’s personalities.
- See specific tags per-story on A03
Part One: 'Number Five and the Girl  (227,442 words) (Starts pre-season one, age 16, coming of age angst, humor, sexual activity and trauma)
Part Two: 'Infinity’ (417,307 words) (Starts right at start of season three but not a show rewrite, and full of shockers and fun and angst and fluff and plenty of explicit fun)
Part Three: 'Oblivion’ (152,100 words) (Hurt Five and Sexy Five galore, my version season four finale)
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'No More the Victim’  
(132,130 words) (rated E-🏳️‍🌈trans female pairing-see tags in AO3) (Five in a very dark place/hurt/comfort/redemption)
Starts after very dark post Season Three but does get much lighter, angst, first-time, finding yourself, revenge, unexpected romance, sub/dom, sexual humor, overcoming tragedy. seeing yourself and others with openness and love, Five’s time travel fix-it optional finale to the show. 
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My co-authored works with Bad_Kitty
Link to all Bad_Kitty’s private works on AO3)
'The Text Mess’ (5576 words) (rated Teen and up) (Five and Klaus)
A text-based format story done with actual textboxes and phones to make it more fun. Not a love story/romance. Full of hilarious images, sexual humor, Five is Five and Klaus is Klaus in this make you laugh and get the feels short story. Takes place in a blip in time post season three.
'Sharp Dressed Man’  (5514 words) (rated Explicit for sexual content)
Five and his lady love Vivian one shot based off of Bad_Kitty’s Halo Series-see link above. Humor based, sexy Five doing his sexy daddy thing. Christmas time story with a few of the other Hargreeves. Closet sexy craziness.
'When Number Five Steps out, He’s Gonna Do you In’ (8730 words, rated Explicit for sexual content)
The sequel one-shot to 'Sharp Dressed Man.’ Sexual humor, frustrated Five doing New Years things with the family. Lots of feels, sexy Five, a few of the fam, daddy Five getting it done and checking his naughty list off for the year. 
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My Art Featuring Number Five (TUA)
To view my Five art features on Tumblr hit this link
For stuff not on Tumbler see Original Five art from my various works  at this link (rated General)
Hand drawn sketches, graphic art in later chapters. 
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