#five x male reader

[moonyswritinq]

diego : "come on, just admit you have a thing for Five."

you : "no, I do not. 'Cause I'm not the kind to fall for a guy who flashes a smile."

five, overhearing : *sends you a smug smile*

klaus : "yes, you are."

you : "yes, I am."

[i-dont-wanna-be-me-anymore]

Friends? | Five H. x male!reader | Part 2!

Five Hargreeves x male reader

SPOILER WARNING FOR SEASON 4 UNDER

CUT !!!!!

Summary: After a strange night of helping Five and his family and learning about his family’s secrets, Y/n, Five’s coworker and now work partner, wakes up the next morning to a shocking discovery. Inevitably, he’ll have no choice, but be sucked into the family’s antics and problems. This one is longer….Sorry. 🌛

Warnings: fluff, cursing, blood and (gun) violence, vomit, frenemies to friends, sexual tension, SPOILERS FOR SEASON 4 ‼️

A/n: Since some people actually liked my idea for this, I’ll just continue to write more about this, and yes, a lot of this stuff will start to rear away from what happened in the canon. Steve Blackman, sleep with one eye open.

Part 1

• • • • •

When he wakes up, he’s faced with a blinding headache and sweat covering his body.

Y/n sits up slowly, the sweat dripping down his body, but he was thankful he didn’t wear a shirt when he slept. He checked the time and realized it was 3 am, making him groan.

He got up, turning the shower on as he tried whatever he could to nurse his state of dizziness and nausea for the next couple hours until he went to work.

He tried everything. He took a cold shower, he took some pain medication, he drank pepto bismol to relieve his nausea, he tried to rest more, and yet nothing helped.

He decided against calling in sick for work, a part of him wanting to talk to Five and discuss the missing person’s case, and then another part just wanted to see him.

He got to the building and tried his best not to think about the symptoms he was experiencing.

He started to become agitated. His exhaustion and headache becoming a bad mix in him, like he was mad, but he didn’t know at who.

He decided maybe an energy boost will try and relieve it. When he tried to grab some coffee, he accidentally knocked his hand into one of his coworkers, apologizing as he didn’t look in their direction.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to-“ a thud.

As he picked up the coffee pot, he looked in the direction that he heard the body drop, seeing that the person he accidentally knocked into was now on the floor, groaning.

“Oh shit, are you alright?” The man looked at him.

“Do you want me to get some help?” Y/n touched the guys uncovered arm, skin coming in contact with one another as Y/n gasps.

He feels the exhaustion leave his body, the man’s eyes roll back and he passes out on the floor.

Y/n quickly lets go, seeing that the area where he touched his hand was a light glow of yellow. He backs away from the man, looking around to see if anyone saw, and thankfully, no one did.

He got up, rushing to grab his belongings as he went up to someone, sweat still sticking to him as he was still hot and dizzy.

“Hey, can you tell Lance I’m taking a sick day? Thanks,” he rushes out to the lobby of the building, pausing as he felt a rush of pain shoot into his head.

He winced, grabbing his head as he stumbled a little, grabbing the attention of his partner.

“Y/n!” Five called out, almost tripping down the stairs as he basically ran over to him and grabbed his arm.

“Five? What the- where are we going?” Five turns to him once they’re outside the building.

It’s then that Y/n sees what Five fully looks like at the moment.

Sweat is dripping down his forehead, his eyes are twitching. Five’s shaking as he holds his partner’s arm, or maybe he was shivering. It was hard to say.

“You need to come with me,” Five states.

“What are you my boss now?”

“Something’s happening to you, and I know it, okay? You have the same symptoms as me, so I’m going to try and figure this all out before it gets any worse for you, okay?”

For the first time since they started working with each other, it felt like Five truly cared for Y/n. Which was strange and out of the ordinary for him. So, despite the voice that was yelling at him to yank his arm away and run away from him, Y/n nodded.

With that, they hurried over and got to a broken down building, that Y/n soon learned used to be their home in the other timeline.

When they got there, Y/n looked around seeing that some of Five’s siblings from yesterday were there, but not all of them. He saw Diego, Lila, and Luther there, but no Allison, Viktor, Klaus, or Ben.

“Wait, what’s he doing here, Five?” Luther asked, not bothering to cover himself up, even though was only wearing a g-string.

“He’s here because, oddly enough, he’s experiencing the same symptoms as us-“ Five glances over at Luther, “or at least us three.”

“What the fuck is happening to me?” Y/n mumbled to himself, his arms holding his body as he leaned against a nearby wall, staying away from everyone. He didn’t want to hurt anyone else.

Five looked over at him.

“Here,” Five went over and tried to grab his hand, but Y/n pulled it away.

“Watch the skin, I accidentally made Eric from human resources pass out when I accidentally touched his hand,” Luther, Diego, and Lila look over at him with wide eyes.

“Sorry, what?” Lila asked, trying not to look in his exact direction due to her own problem.

Five thought for a moment, trying to not fall over as his body swayed, becoming unsteady.

“Ok…” Five started, “okay, so, try to relax, calm your mind and focus on, you know, not…doing..that?”

Despite the poorly worded advice, Y/n did just that. He took a deep breath, closing his eyes, and tried to calm his mind as he tried to ignore the ache in his hands.

The sting slowly faded away, becoming less hurtful and more calming as he focused on letting his muscles relax and the joints in his hand crack.

He slowly opened his eyes to see Five staring down at their hands as he was able to hold it while not pasing out.

The siblings who started to come in, Allison and Klaus, saw the two at the entrance of the living room and silently reacted to it.

“Come on,” Five led him over to the couch, sitting next to him so he was now between the armrest and Five.

The siblings all argued and bickered with each other around the two, and as much as Y/n wanted to argue and yell at Five about the hell was going on, he just stayed silent, feeling Five lean into him as he fought to stay awake.

“Someone explain what the hell is going on here, quick?!” Viktor shouted over the others who were yelling.

“Well, Viktor, that’s what we’re all trying to figure out,” Luther started to yell at Diego and told everyone to not look at him, and up until this point Y/n hadn’t. But, as he did, he saw that his body was a lot hairier than a regular person, and since meeting him yesterday, he either looked like he pumped himself full of steroids or had a drastic change to his body.

“I SAID DON’T LOOK AT ME!” Y/n quickly looked away as Five shouted at him.

“Hey! Don’t yell at him, alright? You’re drawing attention to yourself by telling everyone not to look at you!” He groaned, his vision getting blurry.

He then sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“Look, at least you’re back to your old self, the rest of us feel like someone injected motor oil into our veins,” that’s when Klaus perked up and admitted that he felt great, his voice only slightly muffled by the mask he was wearing.

Lila joined in on the bickering as she addressed her own problem, one that almost made most of them lose their heads.

Five dragged Y/n by the arm down to the ground, Lila’s laser just barely missing them both times she did it.

They then all tried to calm Viktor down as he started to power up, the house now shaking as Y/n fell back on the couch, head falling back against the edge.

“Relax, Kodiak Jack,” a voice emerged from the corridor as the last Hargreeves brother appeared, seemingly with a tail now.

“It was me.”

“I know you’re all too terminally emo to do what had to be done, so I made an executive decision and spiked your sake with the marigold,” Y/n scoffed, eye twitching as he wanted to rip him apart.

“Why am I not surprised?” Five shook his head.

“I know we just met—actually that’s exactly why I am mad, why the fuck did you have to go and spike mine? I’m not like you guys, I wasn’t born with this!” He gestured to his hands as he yelled at Ben.

“You had no right to do that, asshole!” Viktor shouted.

“Oh, trust me, you’ll thank me later. Even you, newbie,” Viktor grew even more mad at that comment, because it’s exactly like he said, he wasn’t like them, he didn’t want it.

“Yeah, or I’ll kick your ass right now!” He threatened.

“Oh yeah, now that I would love to see,” Ben sat down, almost on Allison, but she frantically moved away, not wanting to touch his tentacles.

Y/n couldn’t help but laugh.

“What’s with the tail?” Y/n snickered, making Ben turn to him.

“I don’t know, they won’t go back in!” They all started to touch or make fun of his tails and he started to say that he was feeling better than ever.

He started to rub some of the marigold onto his teeth, making Five walk up to him and snatch it away.

Klaus then explained how he didn’t feel sick because he didn’t drink in the first place, like the rest of them because of the fact he was sober and didn’t want to go down that path again.

“Wow, I’m both proud and jealous of you,” Y/n gave a small smile to him, making Klaus look at him.

“Thank you!” He pouted, happy that someone actually cared.

But all their heads turned to Viktor and Ben as they started to fight, and Y/n didn’t even both trying to stop them as he was enjoying seeing him get beat up. That and he just felt like it wasn’t his place.

When they stopped, Ben started to speak.

“Give me one good reason as to why we shouldn’t have our powers back?”

“Well, you gave someone powers who didn’t want or have them in the first place?”

“Yeah, and maybe because we ended the world three times?”

“I’m sorry?” Y/n sat up because of that.

“And saved it three times,” Diego butted in.

“Well, that parts highly debatable, Diego,” Y/n’s head snapped over at Five.

“I’ll explain later,” Five reassured, trying to calm his new partner down to the best of ability.

God, he hated him so much, but at the same time he felt the need to care about him just as much.

Feelings were rushing through Five that he had no idea how to feel about, and he didn’t stop thinking about them until Ben threw up on the carpet.

He offered the idea to go back to the laundry mat and grabbed his coat, still holding the marigold.

He placed it in his pocket as he hesitantly placed his hand on the other’s back.

“Come on, I’ll fix this, I promise,” Y/n looked up at him, eyes half lidded as he stood up.

“You know, this is the most I’ve seen you care about someone who wasn’t your family. And, you’re never this nice to me,” Five blinks, stunned as he doesn’t say a word, the realization of his statement hitting him.

“Just…shut up and get in the van,” Y/n grinned at him, climbing in as they all headed off.

When they arrived, they only found an address hanging from the rack as they debated their options.

Either it was all a set up, and this guy, Sy, was tricking them, or he was actually in trouble.

Either way, they ultimately knew that they would be leaving to go to the address anyway.

New Grumpson, Maine.

Diego got excited and unlocked the doors, to which Five was about to get in front, but Lila already called it, so he just decided to get in the back with Klaus, Allison, and Y/n.

Allison got in the middle row first, then Five, then Y/n, and then Klaus, causing them to be extremely close to each other.

So close, to the point where Y/n’s leg was underneath Five’s as he adjusted himself, barely making it work.

“FIRST MISSION BACK!”

“No, not right now,” Y/n mumbled, covering his ears as Lila clapped in the front.

“Why are you so loud?” Five groaned.

• • • • •

After a few minutes of driving, the “Baby Shark” song started to play.

“Can you please change the song?” Viktor groaned, covering his ears.

“Can’t, it’s stuck.” Klaus started to bob his head to the music.

They groaned, and accepted it.

• • • • •

An hour later, the same song was still playing, and Y/n tried his best to control his breathing. He was on the verge of throwing up, but he kept himself composed as he looked over at his coworker.

Five was looking at Diego with a look. A look that screamed that he was about to strangle him in his seat at any moment, while his knuckles clenched, turning white.

Y/n didn’t know what else to do, so instead he placed a hand on his knee, his thumb rubbing it ever so slightly as Five slowly looked at him. And the anger he was feeling before suddenly, and strangely, disappeared.

• • • • •

“Diego, will you change that song!”

“I can’t!” Diego shouts to Luther.

“Oh god, that smells disgusting,” Y/n grimaces, gripping Five’s leg tighter for his own sanity.

Five struggles to keep his composure as his stomach begins to churn.

“Oh, what, you don’t like my kale-kiwi-carrot-cabbage kombucha?”

“For the love of god…” Y/n mumbles, his head falling back as he shakes slightly.

“Uh, Diego..?” He glances at the rear view mirror.

“Maybe, uh, pull over?”

“Nah man, we’re making good time,” Diego glances at the mirror to look back at Five, not realizing that they were all nauseous.

“I could care less about the time and more of my need to leave this car,” Y/n speaks up, holding his stomach.

They all start to argue as Diego insists on not pulling over, throwing his pee bottle at Lila which ends up knocking off her hands and to the middle row at Y/n, who chucks it to the backseat.

Luther screams at Lila to open the window who accidentally ends up breaking it. And as Diego tries to grab the broken handle, he swerves the car, causing everyone to get even more dizzy.

Lila starts to gag, throwing up in her seat.

It triggers a chain reaction as Allison and Y/n start to throw up, Five soon joining in as Klaus freaks out.

Viktor’s bubble bursts as he yells, shattering all the windows.

Diego pulls over and shouts at them, telling them to stop yelling, puking, and using their powers.

He then begins to gag, exiting the car to hurl.

They talk about what to do, and Luther mentions something.

“It’s only another 13 hours to New Grumpson,” they all groan as Five leans his head against Y/n, whose own falls on top of Five’s.

• • • • •

They end up falling asleep as Lila and Diego talk in the front seat.

Mid conversation, Lila begins to hesitate, looking back at Five to see him fast asleep against Y/n. The same man he was complaining about just two days ago at the birthday party.

“I don’t know, what have you been up to Five?” Ben takes a swig of his beer as Luther climbs out of the ball pit, joining them in their conversation as he drinks some punch.

“I hate my partner. He’s such a dick, and sometimes I really just want to grab a number two pencil off his desk and shove up into his scrotum just to get him to shut up,” Five illustrates, annoyed.

“Wow, that’s really graphic,” Ben laughs, seeing the look in his eyes.

“Jesus, Five, you work with the guy, you just gotta suck it up, like I do. There’s some guys I don’t wanna work with, but I still do,�� Luther comments.

“Yeah, well, my job’s different. I can’t get a new partner until we finally solve a case together, which if I’m being honest will most likely never happen,” Five rolls his eyes as he looks away from them, taking another sip of his beer.

“Correct me if I’m wrong, Y/n is the one that Five hates, right? At his job?” Lila asks.

“Yeah, why?”

“Cause he looks like he enjoys his presence quite a lot,” Diego glances at the mirror, his eyebrows furrowing as he smiles.

“Weird,“ he shrugs, not really thinking about it.

“Do you think he likes him?” Diego laughs quietly.

“I doubt it, he hates him too much to be able to ever like one characteristic about him,” Diego says, snickering.

“You hated me when we first started to like each other,” she states.

“No, I didn’t hate you, I was annoyed by you-“ she gives him a look.

“No, no way, Uh-uh, Five is a lot of things, but I think we would know now if he’s gay by now…right?” Lila shrugs, smiling at Diego.

• • • • •

When they arrive to New Grumpson, Y/n and Five both head to the phone booth, looking at each other before shoving one another out of the way, trying to get to it first.

“Move. Over!” Y/n shoves Five away, who yelps almost falling into the snow before he catches himself with the booth’s wall.

He glares at Y/n, who starts to call the town, looking for two people; Sy Grossman and Jennifer Grossman.

Five stands behind him, listening to him speaking to the operator, hearing that there’s no listings of either.

“There’s no Sy Grossman or Jennifer Grossman listed here,” Five announces, making Y/n roll his eyes as he puts the phone back down.

They agree that they need to split up and Diego walks out from behind the van wearing, what looks like, a harness.

“Oh my god,” Y/n laughs, making Five smile at him before it quickly drops as he looks away from him.

Five couldn’t figure out what the reason was for him to be feeling like this for him, Y/n, of all people. He was stubborn, and a prick, and way too comfortable around him, even if at times he did like it, a lot.

He shook the thoughts away as he heard Diego say it fits like a glove.

“Yeah, OJ’s glove…” Five nods, smiling again as they split up.

Diego and Lila go one way as Five takes Y/n with him, heading to an area with a fair going on.

• • • • •

Y/n looks around, seeing a cart selling hats and gloves for the weather.

“Come on,” He grabs Five by the upper arm, pulling him to the cart despite his disproval.

“What are we doing?” Five asks, letting himself be taken by the other man.

“Buying me gloves,” He smiles, technically asking Five.

“We’re doing that?” Five asks, pointedly.

“Well, you.” Five scoffs.

“Need I remind you that you are the reason I have these god awful powers now?”

“How is that my fault? My idiot brother was the one who spiked the drinks, not me?”

“Who was the one who asked me to go with him to the restaurant?” Five goes silent. Y/n puts his finger behind his ear as if to listen to him better.

“You got me in a box here, you win,” Five pulls out his wallet as Y/n picks out some black leather gloves, handing to Five as he pays for them.

“Thank, Fivey.”

“Don’t call me that.”

Y/n, as an experiment, pokes Five’s cheek, making sure that he was still safe before continuing on to put to the gloves on.

“Just seeing if I can still control it right now,” he responds and that reminds Five of something.

“Um, can you just keep a look out?” Y/n looks confused as Five moves to an area with less people, but still in public and balls his hands up into fists.

He starts to take a step and then step back, repeating this motion until Y/n starts to laugh a bit.

“What are you doing?” Five rolls his eyes.

“Why do you care?”

“Cause it looks like you’re constipated, Five,” Five stops, turning to him.

“What’s your problem?”

“My problem?” Y/n repeats.

“Why do you always seem to want to piss me off every single second we’re around each other?”

“Um, because it’s funny?” Y/n looks at Five as he looks like he’s trying to read him.

“Look, I don’t know what other ways to socialize than using my humor, and it’s gotten me this far,” Five chuckles, the cold air making his breath show.

“Why are you always such a hothead all the time?”

“I am not-!” Y/n raises his eyebrows as Five had stepped closer.

He backs down, relaxing as he comes face to face with him, but this time he doesn’t look like he’s threatening him.

“I am not a hothead, I just get annoyed by people who can’t seem to mind their business,” Y/n leans closer.

“Well, your business is my business now, thanks to your brother,” their inches apart as they look at each other, Five’s eyes change as he continues to look at him, softening.

“Look, I’m-“

“What are you guys talking about?” Diego comes up with Lila, who is still wearing her sunglasses to cover up her eye bags.

“Deciding which seasonal beverage to indulge in,” Five lies, smiling up at his brother.

Y/n’s lips had shut tightly as he looks down at the spot where Five’s lips used to be, his eyebrows furrowing as he tries to shake a thought away.

“Why’d he feel the need to lie? Is he-? No, there’s no way,” he thought.

“And?”

“I’m getting some muller wine for myself, and uh, Y/n, here is getting the cider,” Diego looks at, the still dazed, Y/n as he just offers up a smile.

“Okay..” he looks over at Lila.

“Well, we were just trying to decide that as well, I was thinking…” Y/n looks away from the two, looking over at the rides as Five continues to listen to the two bicker.

In the distance, there’s an elf, staring directly at Five and his family. Y/n could tell because as the elf realized he was looking, his eyes shifted slightly towards him.

“Five?” He nudges him, who looks in the direction he was looking in.

“That elf…he’s staring right at us,” Diego and Lila look.

“Who?”

“That elf. He’s been staring at you guys,” Y/n states, watching as his hand twists on the lever.

“Actually, maybe he just likes you,” Y/n snickers as Lila high-fives him, but Five doesn’t say anything. Now this was starting to worry him even more.

The man pulls the lever up, causing the rides to stop and everybody to turn their heads towards them as they start firing.

Y/n pushes Five in front of him, who is about to look back at him before he disappears in front of him.

“FIVE?!” Y/n keeps running, wanting to look over and try and see where he went, but he knows he can’t stop as the bullets fly past him.

He runs into the town, trying to find the rest of Five’s family.

A person with a shotgun comes up in front of him, causing him to pull out his gun and shoot, shooting any other people who had a gun pointed at him.

He hears gunfire closer to the outside of the town, causing him to run towards it, finding a Santa Claus running at Luther and two other siblings with two guns in hand.

Five soon blinks into the street, not realizing he’s getting shot at, but he’s quickly pulled down.

“Fuck,” Y/n tries to shoot, but he realizes he’s out of ammo. As the man gets closer to Luther, Y/n looks down, seeing one of the guys he shot move.

He looks up, wanting to try something with this new found power he has.

He leans down, tearing off a glove with his teeth as he touches the man’s hand, speeding up his death as he absorbs the energy he had.

With that, he starts to sprint towards the Santa Claus, running faster than he ever has before.

He catches up to the Santa Claus and grabs his face, pressing his exposed hands into it as they glow.

The gunfire stops, and Five peaks around Luther to see Y/n behind him, a yellow glow emitting from him as he absorbed the man’s energy.

His skin tightened. His cheekbones began to show as his eyes rolled into the back of his head.

His suit became looser as he exhaled shakily, falling limp under Y/n’s grasp.

He looked down at his hands and then at the man in front of him, seeing him now dead.

He took his life force.

He stares at the glow in his hands, watching as it fades into his skin, energizing him.

All the muscle aches he had before from running, the nausea from his sickness, all gone.

Five practically jumps on him as he wraps his arms around his neck, holding him tightly.

He closes his eyes and inhales, his scent filling his senses before he realizes who and what he’s exactly doing this to.

Five quickly pulls away and pushes Y/n.

“What the hell were you thinking?”

“Wha-?” Y/n looks over to the three siblings, shocked that Five just said that to him, and then stunned as they’d never seen Five hug anyone since they were kids.

“I saved your life, Five! What did it look like I was doing?”

“You could have gotten killed!”

“Yeah, well I didn’t! In fact, I’ve never felt this alive in my entire life,” Y/n looks down at his hands, watching as they glow as he turns them over, and then fade.

Five’s about to say more, but they both turn their heads as soon as they hear the familiar tune that brought them to the town in the first place.

Diego was driving Wanda, running the Santa over as he stopped just in front of Y/n and Five.

“Get in! Now! Go, go, go!” Everyone crowded into the van as Klaus spit up blood in the backseat, a bullet wound in his chest.

Five looked around, trying to find a spot to quickly squeeze into.

“Oh for Christ’s sake,” Y/n pulled Five in by the waist, seating him on his lap and closing the door.

Diego started to drive away as the other van door closed, a dying Klaus in the backseat.

Y/n looked back at him, quickly shoving Five to get the marigold for him as everyone started to yell to give Klaus the marigold.

Allison hesitated, stumbling over her words as she didn’t want to give him it, but decided against it as she couldn’t let him die.

Not her best friend. Not Claire’s uncle. Not her brother.

“I’m so sorry, Klaus,” she whispered, shaking as she poured the rest of the marigold into his wound.

It took a minute, but Klaus soon gasped to life, asking what did they do, and started to cry in their arms.

Diego tossed one of the reindeers he had for his kids into the back, Klaus holding it as he grounded himself from coming back to life.

Y/n let out a deep breath, his head hitting the back of the seats as Five’s did too, reminding both of them of the position they were in.

Five didn’t dare to turn his head to the side, and neither did Y/n, now terrified if they ever hit a bump while driving.

He started taking deep breaths, slowly trying to calm his mind.

Five wanted to shift, he wanted to reposition himself so he wasn’t directly on…him, but he couldn’t. He was stuck. Afraid of what the outcome would be if he suddenly felt his-

“What?”

“We’re taking you to your father, Sy Grossman..?”

“Who?”

In an instant they were in mid-air, Five didn’t have a seat belt though.

Y/n quickly wrapped his arms around Five again, holding onto the roof of the car as they flipped, Five’s head falling back as he passes out.

Y/n starts to lift out of his seat, with Diego trying to reach over and block Five from flying around the car.

Diego’s hand touches Y/n’s and suddenly, Y/n feels a spike of energy.

His hand comes crashing down against the dashboard, quickly gripping onto it as he stabilizes both himself and Five. His nails carving into the material of the car and leaving highly noticeable marks.

Unfortunately for him, the car comes crashing down, and when it does, he gets whiplashed by the force of it and is knocked out, hand still grasping at Five’s waist.

He barely even notices when two unknown people come and take Jennifer away.

—

A/n: Okay! Hello! I did not realize the last part would get so much recognition, but it did. YIPEE! Thank you for actually liking this work. I’m going based off memory when writing these because I do NOT want to rewatch s4 cus i will scream and cry. Also I’m in between works rn, bc I have another Five fanfic called “Lost with You” and that I post on AO3 so. If you want to check it out, feel free to! Also! reader is like mid 20’s, because I felt like any older, AND DEFINETLY ANY YOUNGER, would be too weird to develop a relationship with Five. Because considering he’s mentally 63, and physically 18-19, it’s a little odd. Anyways, next part will hopefully be out soon.

[reallyromealone]

five with child male reader who he takes care of like his own sun but the kid is slightly older or taller which makes people think their older brother when really Five is the one driving them to fucking soccer practice in a van

imagine the rest of the umbrella academy finding out and seeing how fond Five looks at male reader when he makes him something

Oh this was fun to write

Male reader - child male reader - fluff

🩷☁️🩷☁️🩷☁️🩷☁️🩷☁️🩷☁️🩷☁️🩷☁️🩷☁️🩷

"(name)! Hurry your ass up or I'm leaving you" five said to the nine year old who was already taller than the old man in a tweens body "sorry! Forgot my guards" (name) said with his duffle bag over his shoulder in his uniform.

They found (name) when he was only six, the boy abandoned and give took him as his own.

Klaus found it hilarious.

"He's taller than you!" The clairvoyant man cackled during dinner, five throwing a fork at him.

Five drove them to the kids game, a cup of coffee and a sugary drink for the exhausted dad and his son "god it's so sweet seeing a dad and his son bond, it's beautiful" Klaus spoke up from the back seat and five glared "Of course you're sleeping behind there" the single dad grumbled "and miss my beloved nephews big game? Never"

"Thanks uncle Klaus" (name) said taking a sip of his drink and Klaus eyed it curiously as a tattooed band went to reach for his nephews drink "don't touch it" Ben said to klaus, the blonde ignoring his dead brother but five slapped his hand away, the blond groaning.

When they got there five told his son "beat their asses" and watched him run to his team "oh you're such a good older brother, are you old enough to be driving though?" A woman said patronizing and the brunette glared "Don't fucking talk to me, I'm his dad" the other moms snickered, many of which already know the snappy brunette and fell for the technical lie of he looks extremely young like Thomas Brodie-Sangster.

It helped that Five stopped dressing in his uniform and in more "casual" clothes, the man preferring to dress in suits.

(Name) was a beast in soccer, the tallest in his team gave him an advantage with speed as he decimated the other team.

Klaus saw how fond he looked at his son and snapped a picture, sending it to the other siblings who genuinely didn't think five could have this side to him, but apparently murderous old men in a teens body could be fatherly as well.

[ynbabe]

TUA x Reader :- Incorrect quotes

Five: Watcha doin?

Y/N, an inter-dimentional time traveler : Stealing from the commission.

Five: Scandalous.

Five: Can I help?

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

Five: Are you busy?

Y/N, laying on the floor, falling from the time rip Five opened in season 2: No.

Five, trying to understand who he is and why he’s there: Want to do something?

Y/N, looking up from his own blood: Why would you try to ruin this for me?

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

Klaus, pointing a camera at Five and his ‘friend’: There they are, our sweet babies.

Five, holding a cigarette and a beer, Y/N, pulling out the knife Five stabbed him with and chugging wine,: What-?

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

Five: Y/N is not allowed to decide which one of us is the chosen one.

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

Y/N: Hey there demons, It's me, ya boi.

Five: I’M NOT A DEMON!

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

Diego, oldest sibling extraordinare {luther don’t count}: Christmas is cancelled.

Y/N, not a part of the family: You can't cancel a holiday.

Diego, adopted them already: Keep it up, Y/N, and you'll lose New Year's too.

Y/N: What does that mean?

Diego: Klaus, take New Year's away from Y/N.

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

*Comments under an image of a really hot knife cutting bread*

Diego: Imagine stabbing someone with this knife.

Y/N: It would instantly cauterize the wound, so the person wouldn't bleed, so it's not very useful.

Five: if you want information it is

Klaus: why would you STAB a person when you can have TOAST?

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

Diego, watching Y/N and Five fight: Are you sure they should be fighting? What if they break Elliot’s stuff?

Klaus, not bothered by the chaos: It’s fine. They’re too evenly matched to hurt each other... or anything else... hopefully.

Diego: Then... who’s the strongest?

Klaus: Y/N.

Five: Me.

Y/N: Me.

Y/N: ...

Five: ....

Y/N and Five: *Start fighting again*

Diego: I mean it’s kinda fun right?

Klaus: Yeah, want popcorn?

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

Klaus: You guys worried about Five?

Diego: Totally!

Y/N: Yeah, he teleported to me in the middle of the night and just yelled, "what do I do, what do I do, what do I do, what do I do?"

Klaus: And what'd you say?

Y/N: "I dunno, I dunno, I dunno, I dunno."

Diego:

Klaus: He’s lucky to have you as a friend.

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

Five: Look guys, I need help.

Klaus: Love help?

Y/N: Financial help?

Viktor: Emotional help?

Diego: Help moving a body?

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

Viktor: Ah, yes. Here we have a beautiful broship...

Klaus: I really care about your feelings!

Diego: I really care about YOUR feelings!

Viktor, turning his head: ...and then there's the disaster couple...

Y/N: YOU NEED TO PAY MORE ATTENTION TO ME INSTEAD OF HIDING BODIES!

Five: I WOULDN'T HAVE TO SPEND SO MUCH TIME HIDING BODIES IF YOU STOPPED INSISTING ON FIGHTING EVERYONE WHO COMES WITHIN A FIVE FOOT RADIUS OF YOU!

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

Viktor: Who the fuck added me to a fucking group chat?

Diego: >:O language

Five: Yeah watch your fucking language

Klaus: Okay, who taught Five the fuck word?!

Y/N: 'The fuck word'.

Sparrow!Ben, highly comercialized: Are you stupid? You guys use the f word all the time

Five: Oh my god he censored it

Y/N: Say fuck, Ben.

Five: Do it, Ben. Say fuck.

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

*The Squad with cigarettes*

Y/N: I smoke regularly.

Allison: I smoke sparingly.

Sparrow!Ben: I smoked once, but I didn't care for it.

Five: I've never smoked, but the idea intrigues me.

Diego: I've never smoked, and I refuse to do so.

Viktor: What's a cigarette?

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

Five, trying to be happier, after strict orders from Klaus and Diego: A butterfly. Hey, little guy, gal or nonbinary pal.

Diego: Can a butterfly be nonbinary?

Five: I mean, maybe? I don't judge.

Viktor, staring dreamily out of the window: Ah, have you ever imagine having butterfly wings? Then-

Klaus: Then it would be inconvenient as fuck. Your wings would smack every doorframe and your clothes would have to have holes in the back.

Sparrow!Ben: Also, your wing's paper thin, so even a six year old aimed a NERF gun at it would... Yeah...

Y/N: *sips coffee* According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way that a-

Viktor: No, nononono. You fuckers have already shattered my dream, you don't get the fucking privilege to make that reference.

Diego: Also, it's about a butterfly, not a bee... Why would you make that reference?

Five: You clearly have not known with the bastard long enough.

[fandomz-brainrot]

Far From Home... (Five Hargreeves x Male Reader)

“Where are we?”

Prompt by @soprompt <3

Five Hargreeves x male reader

Tw: gang violence, guns, death, brief drug mention

---

You and Five have been friends for a while now. You met after one of the Umbrella's missions; resolving a gang shootout. A bit dark and extreme, as they usually deal with the simple bank robbers and the like, but oh well. They were growing older, around the age of 12 by now, so Reginald must deem them mature and skilled enough to handle a task such as this.

You were in the midst of this shootout, and a bit older than the Umbrella's at 14-- a one and a half year difference to be exact. Your family had been mixed up with crime for as long as you could remember. Your brother would end up becoming Klaus's plug in the future, a sign of solidarity between a small section of your family and the Academy. They did save your asses during the infamous shootout after all.

Speaking of the shootout, that was a thing that was happening. You had been taught how to wield a small pistol since a young age, and it was now your weapon of choice-- tiny yet effective. Or, it would be effective, if the rival gang member hadn't knocked it out of your hands. So it was safe to say that you were utterly screwed.

You couldn't even remember what the reasoning for the gang shootout was-- drug money, perhaps? A murder of a member? Who knows, if you wanted to survive out here you had to fight for your gang. So it was now fists or nothi-- OH SHIT.

You felt a boot roughly kick the back of your knees, causing them to buckle beneath you. You fell to the ground, scraping your palms as you caught yourself. The bullets were still being shot around you, and they were quite honestly giving you a migraine. Especially now that you had been injured.

A hand roughly grabs you by your hair and yanks you to an upright kneeling position. You felt the barrel of a firearm press against your temple as the person behind you held your wrists behind your back. You gritted your teeth, trying to keep your composure.

"You're the leader's son, right? I don't want to shoot you kid, so just tell me where the goddamn money is!" he yelled in your ear, pressing the gun harder against your head. Giving the answer would surely mean death by your gang, staying silent would mean death from the rivals. It was really a lose-lose situation.

So, you clenched your jaw and stared ahead. If you were going to die, you weren't going to be a little bitch about it. It was just the way these things were.

The man sighed angrily. "I'll give you one last chance boy, just tell me wh-" you didn't hear the last of his words because all you could feel was the lack of cold metal against you. You took this as an opportunity to headbutt the dude in the face. He groaned, letting go of you to hold his now bleeding nose.

You wasted no time grabbing your pistol from the ground and slamming the butt of it on the back of the guy's head. There was a small crack-- probably a fracture, hopefully nothing more than that. As long as he was out cold.

But where did his gun even go? You looked around, until you spotted it in the hands of a boy a bit younger than you. He stared at you, mouth slightly agape and grinning. He seemed very impressed with your movements.

You recognized him as an Umbrella kid-- that prissy little uniform and mask being a dead giveaway. You didn't know which one. And he was standing a considerable ways away, so how did he even get that from him-- HOLY SHIT WHY IS THERE BLUE LIGHT AND WHY IS HE NOW NEXT TO YOU-

"Nice moves, for a civilian." He said, now standing less than a foot away from you. He decided to stay with you for the time being. His siblings could handle it, the action was already dying down, and this would be a lot more interesting. Plus, once he was trained enough, he would be out of this shithole...

You looked at the gun in his hand, eyebrow raised. "How did you...?" If his eyes weren't obscured by the mask, you're sure he would've rolled them. You felt the metal of your gun leave your hand. It reappeared in the boy's, accompanied by what looked like some sort of blue energy and a small woosh type of noise.

"Are you... not familiar with us? With me? That's... literally my whole thing." he said, the same blue energy surging as he reappeared next to you. He kicked the unconscious man who had you at gunpoint moments earlier to the side, leaning on the wall behind you two.

"Um.. I've heard of you. Didn't know the specifics." you said shortly, your eyes slightly wide as you scooted away. "You guys are... strange." you said your words carefully. The boy huffed angrily, crossing his arms as he rested his foot against the wall. "Yeah, well, we just saved your ass, so..." he said pointedly, pushing himself off the wall. He started to leave, so you put a hand on his shoulder to stop him.

"And I'm um... that was like... cool of you... so... thanks..?" you said hesitantly. You've never had to thank anyone before. You really didn't like it. He huffed, starting to walk away again.

"Wait!" he paused again, growling in frustration. "What, what do you want?" he said grumpily. "Can I see you again... um..." "Five"

"Um... what?"

"Five. My name. It's Five. Five Hargreeves."

You chuckle under your breath. "Your name is... Five? Like the number?"

"...yeah."

You instantly feel bad. "Wait, no, that was a dick move, I'm sor-"

"Yeah, I'll see you againnn..." He dragged out the last word so you could tell him your name.

"(Y/n). (Y/n) (L/n)."

"Well then I'll see you around, (Y/n) (L/n)."

"Yeah, see ya, Five Hargreeves."

He tensed his body as if to teleport, but stopped. "Get your side of the gang out of here quick. Police will be here in 10 minutes, give or take. I'll convince my siblings to cut you guys some slack."

And with that, he teleported out of there in a flash of blue, leaving you in awe.

It took you a second to realize what he said, and you hauled ass to get you and your people out of there.

---

Five kept his word. The next day you woke up to Five sitting on the windowsill of your shitty apartment, knocking on the window casually. That's how most days would go; him sneaking over to visit you and teleporting on to your windowsill or you sneaking off to the Hargreeve's mansion. Five would meet you outside and teleport you in, and your name became familiar to the other Umbrellas.

Whenever your home life would get too much to handle, you'd go over to the mansion. If it was Five's training day, someone else would look after you. You and Klaus would do each other's nails. You would teach Diego your combat skills and help him with his stutter. Luther would try to bench-press you. You and Allison would put on little fashion shows together. You'd sneak some comics over that you stole for Ben to read, so you guys could talk about them together. And you'd listen to Viktor play his violin.

The Hargreeve's children and even Grace, who kept your visits a secret from Reginald, had become more of a family to you than your own. Except for your older brother, Aidan, he was your best friend. He even accompanied you sometimes, and got close to Klaus.

But, as nice as all the other Umbrellas were, you would always have a soft spot for Five. You enjoyed annoying the prickly pre-teen, but also got to see a hint of his soft side. You were the only person who seemed to actually enjoy his company. You'd bring him coffee, which quickly became his favorite thing to ever exist. He would teach you basic skills; you had never enrolled in school because of your gang background, so he taught you how to read and write. Eventually, when you could read well, you two would read books together. Or he would just read to you and let you listen. Either was fine with you.

You were very childish by nature, since you had been forced to grow up quickly. Around Five you could just let loose. And that childishness complimented his uptight nature perfectly, allowing his hard edges to soften for a few moments.

You two were best friends. So, when Five told you his plan go in to the future, you offered to go with him without hesitation. You didn't have much to lose besides Aidan, so you didn't see the harm in it. You would follow Five to the ends of the Earth if you had to.

So, when Five knocked on your windowsill and told you that it was time, you eagerly followed him. You put the prewritten note you had ready next to Aidan's bed left with Five. And what a mistake that was.

You had a hand on Five's shoulder as you two travelled through time. Months, at first. You two grinned at each other as you watched the seasons change before your eyes. It was beautiful.

Then, you were met with the rubble of the world you had once known. Your hand fell from Five's shoulder, your eyes widening in shock and disbelief.

"Um... Five?" your voice was strained as you tried to remain calm.

“Where are we?”

Five didn't meet your eyes. He stared at ruined world around him, bits of soot and ash sticking to his face. "The... the future, but- no this... this can't be right..." he muttered nervously, his eyes knitted together in confusion and disbelief. He began to walk around, looking for any clues or signs of life. You followed him, slowly looking around.

All of a sudden he froze in his tracks. You followed his gaze, your breath hitching at what you saw. It was what must have been the corpses of all of Five's siblings. All of your friends.

Your brunette companion's eyes glazed with tears as he stared blankly. "N-no... this... no, this isn't right..." he muttered shakily. He let out a dry chuckle, his trembling hands tangling in his hair. He tugged at it, staring at the corpses in front of him. "This... This can't be what the future is..." He whispers to himself.

You go to comfort him when something catches your eye; a newspaper. You pick it up, reading the date before walking back over to Five. You place a hand on his face, tilting it to look at you. "Hey- this is the day it all went to shit. If we can get back... maybe we can get all of your siblings, and stop this from ever happening. You're like.. a genius, I'm sure you can figure out how to get back. And I'll help however I can, alright?" you reasoned.

He took a deep inhale from his nose, breathing out through his mouth. He blinked rapidly to clear the tears from his eyes, and grounded himself. He stared back in to your eyes. "Alright... we'll... we can prevent this." he said, mainly trying to convince himself.

You smiled at him, beckoning him to follow you as you walked away. "Come on-- lets try and find some supplies." you said, holding your head up high. "And plus, you still have me, right?"

You feel his hand brush against yours. He smirks slightly, trying to look confident as he walks beside you. "Yeah. And I know you'll still be a pain in my ass, even during the fucking apocalypse." he said sarcastically, but his smile never left his face.

"Awww, you know you love me!"

He pauses, a light blush dusting his cheeks as his smile widens. "Yeah. I do love you." he says, his words sounding clear and sure.

You smile widely, taking his hand in your own and interlocking your fingers. "And I love you too."

(2041 words)

[eternal-armin]

'CAUSE HE THINKS he's made of candy.

i think this is the longest thing i've ever written here, around 6.7k words and i had to revise it a lot because it took up too much space ;;; the title is a reference to candy by robbie williams because that song slaps hard

pairing : five hargreeves x male/transmasc reader. [he/him pronouns]

─────

where : after surviving the apocalypse together and saving the world, things finally return to normal, in good ways and in bad ways.

─────

warnings : mentions of trauma, some light mentions of gore, reader has a congenital insensitivity to pain and find getting injured amusing, so... a lot of that kind of trouble. i totally wanna do another part or so because klaus and diego being father figures gives me life

you walked through the half-dark house, making your way to five's room like you had many times, skateboard in one hand and phone in the other. making sure you hadn't waken anybody up, you opened the door, greeted by the expected sight of a dark bedroom and the sound of gentle snoring. "five, wake up~," you whispered, half singing, shaking his arm, steadily waking him up. he looked annoyed, his brow already furrowed and a frown already tugging at his lips, but he wasn't angry. he was rather used to it by now, in all honesty. "your favorite person ever in the entire world is here!" you hummed. five could basically smell the grin you wore.

"and i wish he would go away," he grumbled in response, trying to turn back over and go back to sleep, only for you to flick on the light and blind him. "jesus christ, a fucking―a warning next time, please?"

"shove your warnings up your ass, five, you can miss out on your middle schooler sleep schedule for a night."

"many nights, actually," he hissed distastefully, giving a mourning glance to the cozy pillow before he sat up, now disappointingly awake. "what do you want this time?" the grogginess was now leaving his voice, but not really his eyes. five almost looked nice when sleepy, even if he looked pissed as hell at being woken up. at least your face was a little more pleasant to look at now that you were back to your teenage self.

"let's go shopping."

five looked at you like you were utterly insane, then slowly looked over at his clock. he cocked his head at you. "it's almost midnight."

"mm, did i stutter?"

"i wish you did. i'm not going shopping with you at midnight. no place is even open." five tried to put his foot down. he was a steel wall to anyone else. but to you―perhaps for you, he was simply a clay plot, one easy to crack the more water you filled it with. it was nice to spend time with you without the entire world desolate and destroyed around you, at least.

"who said the place had to be open?" you shot back with a cheeky grin. five wished that he could be surprised with your blatant delinquency. at some points it had done you both well and your affinity for breaking rules, laws, and regulations gave you a peculiar resourcefulness, but now that you were both safe and home, well... you'd become a mischievous troublemaker. just how you used to be.

"... how the hell did we ever become friends." his voice was utterly flat and his expression exhausted and peeved and yet he still stood up, shrugging the blankets off of himself, heading to his closet because he would be damned if you were going to get hurt and he wouldn't be there to laugh at you.

well, you didn't really get hurt, did you?

"i dunno, but i'm sure you regret your decision." five didn't respond to that. "i will satiate your worries, though, old man, it's an abandoned mall this time."

"wow. character development. didn't expect that from you." with the newfound information he searched for something decent to wear. something that allowed him to move and remain covered by shadows should any unsavory things come to pass.

"hey, hey, i went from crying when i stepped on an ant to killing people, and even if that's negative character development, it's still character development, okay? stop underselling me." you leaned against the wall next to his door, skateboard lounging beside you, picking at your nails. he finally took a full glance at you now that sleep was totally gone from his mind and his body, narrowing his eyes. you were wearing jean shorts, an old nirvana t-shirt, and a hawaiian button-down completely unbuttoned. at least you were wearing knee-pads this time around, but that was all the praise he could give you. five still found himself stunned that you so brazenly didn't care about how visible your scars were; scars from broken bones, scrapes, cuts, gashes, burns, stabs, bullets, shrapnel. you paraded them about like they were boy scout badges which was almost hilarious because you never learned anything from the incidents which now lined your body. even though five would never do it himself, and in fact found it incredibly weird, he kind of respected it. admired it, even. but just that one thing, nothing else. never.

"what, see something you like, old man?" you mused, going from fidgeting with your fingers to looking him in the eye, your own glinting with a bit of cheekiness. not the worst thing to be woken up to in the middle of the night.

five scoffed. "never in my life." you rolled your eyes at that sarcastic response and your grin did not fade. "you're―you're seriously wearing that?"

"hey, i dress my age, mr. retired-man-with-dementia-who-only-remembers-how-to-play-bingo, alright? leave me be." neither of you were bothered by bickering whilst five changed from pajamas to day clothes. he wasn't getting totally naked, so neither of you really gave a shit.

"'dress your age'..." he muttered. "you dress like a blind tween."

"thanks, hot stuff."

"that wasn't a compliment."

"i literally could not care less," you shot back, then winked at him, adding, "lovingly."

five faked a chuckle in some sort of hum sound, shooting you a falsified grin before returning to what he was doing. "i don't want your love. i'm good."

you frowned a bit yourself, which was totally and utterly unnerving and made five, somehow, regret what he said a little bit. "ouch, dude, tell me how you really feel."

"you couldn't comprehend even the most elementary of my emotions, so i'll spare you the headache." he glanced at you a few times, more so at that lingering twinge of unhappiness that so brazenly took over your expression. those words were typically the closest you would ever get to verbal reassurance or comfort from five, not just because he was completely incapable of voicing his own emotions properly, but because physicality did more for you than talking ever did; so, with a comfortable, neutral flannel now hiding his previously exposed torso, he placed a hand on your shoulder. he was always gentle with you, which completely didn't make sense because if anyone in the world needed to be treated gently it would certainly not be you.

a little smile found its way back on your lips. now reassured that not everything was wrong with the world, five pulled on a dark sweater and paperboy cap. you looked him over. "you really look like a retiree now," you mused, but it wasn't an insult. he looked nice like this, out of that hellish uniform, and never could you imagine him in anything else. "do you wanna hit the golf course too, gramps? i'm sure they got some mocktails for you since you wanna keep the drinking to a minimum tonight."

"shut it before i make you." he spoke through gritted teeth, jabbing a finger at you, only succeeding in making you grin.

"is that a threat or a promise?" you clicked your tongue, picking up your skateboard and heading for the door before he could say anything else. "the old tree is, like, a twenty-five-minute walk."

"i'll just blink us, i'm not spending another thirty minutes with you on a skateboard on rough sidewalks, i don't even wanna think about what would happen this time."

"it was so cool, though! i never thought a compound fracture could look like that!"

"[y/n], you only think it's cool because you couldn't feel the pain."

"uh, yeah," you said back, raising a brow at him while he shut off the light to his room and closed the door behind you two. "but it was still cool." you had your bubbly little grin again and five rolled his eyes. despite all that trouble, all that excessive worry he would never admit to feeling, five still looked back somewhat fondly on those times. back when you were ten, still learning how to skateboard, and your parents didn't even give you a helmet or joint pads, when you broke your ankle and didn't even know something had happened until five pointed it out.

after taking one hell of a tumble, hearing the board crack a bit beneath you, you let out a breathless huff, allowing yourself a moment to absorb the sudden shift in, well, everything. five perked up at the sound, surprised you weren't crying or something after falling like that. you stood up and brushed yourself off like nothing was wrong, peering strangely down at the board, which had no damage. you pushed it back and forth once or twice with one foot and it seemed undamaged. that was weird. you'd heard it break, right? five came up to your side, glancing you over once or twice, before his eyes settled down at your feet. "you've got a little something on, uh―" five cut himself off, eyes wide, and you knew that shit was bad when he looked at you like that. he looked about as shocked as one could be, and that unnerved you to no end.

"what? what, did i..." you looked down at your shirt to make sure you hadn't torn it up or anything or were totally exposed, somehow completely not noticing the broken ankle on which you were unsteadily standing, chalking it up to you still half-standing on your skateboard. "what, i don't see what's wrong this picture. stop being cryptic with me, man, you know i'm dumb as shit."

"well―i mean, you aren't wrong about that 'dumb as shit' thing, but i think you just fully busted your ankle." his curtness was plain and simple, and you had already known back then that it would be a constant in his attitude. you looked down, then back up, your eyes wide and mouth twisted as you poorly suppressed a grin and a very annoying giggle. "don't look at me like that! how―how are you not feeling it? that would hurt like hell!" he kept gesturing down at your ankle, at the protrusion of bone and reddening, swelling skin.

"i dunno, i just can't feel it," you mumbled. he pursed his lips, simultaneously in disbelief at what you were saying and knowing that you were too shit at lying to pull this kind of thing off. all of a sudden, his mind was screeching like a fork in a garbage disposal. not being able to feel pain was kind of a bad thing.

he had actually been right, to no one's surprise, when you were diagnosed with congenital analgesia. that incident had marked the day where five silently vowed to be there to protect you, because you were alone except for him. and, to a certain extent, he was alone except for you.

"god really was fucked up when he made you, wasn't he," he muttered.

you both headed downstairs and the clock, by now, was probably around twelve. klaus waited at the bottom of the staircase with the cheekiest of smirks on his face, hands clasped together and his cheek leaning against them. you let out an exhausted groan, thinking you'd missed this tonight.

"something tells me he's super weird-dad tonight."

"why are you surprised, he's klaus, and he's basically your dad."

klaus let out some weird giggle. "i mean, i prefer the thought of being the really cool uncle who teaches you how to smuggle alcohol and how to juke rehab therapists, but i don't mind being a dad." he stepped in front of you two, hands now extended, and that dopey uber-proud dad smile back. "oh, just look at you two!"

"i thought you were sober," five said flatly.

"come on, you two are perfect together! your over-the-top chaos," he gestured to you, "and your sterile literalism!" and he gestured to five. "i'm just waiting for you two to make it official, i mean, two guys don't just survive fifty years in the apocalypse together only from a platonic bond." you and five shared a wide-eyed glance. "don't worry, if my cupid abilities don't get you two together, hormones will. i can't imagine going through puberty twice, let alone the sexual tension between two guys who can't admit their love for one another―"

you put your face in your hands, utterly embarrassed, whilst five was utterly unsurprised. a similar conversation had gone down before, and he just hated reliving it. "okay! that's enough. okay, okay, uh, we're gonna go! if you contact me within the next seven days, i will call child protection services and the police." of course, the threat was empty, but hyperbole was the best way to get your point across. klaus raised his hands in surrender and stepped out of your way. he did enjoy the picture of you two, though; the two extremes on opposite sides of the social attitudes spectrum, one extroverted to the point of it being a flaw and the other antisocial to hell; the opposite sides of the fashion spectrum, one being well-put together mature vintage, and the other being power-clashing at its finest. the multicolored shoelaces were also an appreciated detail.

"i love you too, my little schneke."

"... stop calling me a snail, i'm―i'm not slow."

"maybe not physically," five said quietly to you, and in response you jabbed him in the side with a quiet 'fuck you.' on that cheerful note, you two went about your way. the front door clicked closed behind you, and in a flash of blue-tinted light, you were gone, and the house was mostly silent. klaus was soon joined by allison, quietly making her way downstairs, the only remaining light sleeper of the family.

"you really are just laying on that matchmaker thing, aren't you." she sounded drowsy and awake at the same time. klaus greeted her with a simple smile and a single nod.

"i mean, aren't they just the perfect couple?"

"they certainly were standing next to each other," allison mumbled.

seeing five frustrated was worrying. staring down at his clenched fists, blue light barely rippling out like ice spreading over a metal surface. and so when you passed him, even when he did not notice you, you touched his shoulder, finding yourself in another time. "h-hey, uh, five―" you managed, feeling nauseated as yet again he travelled to some time else.

"get off of me, [y/n], you shouldn't be here!" he looked at you with anger, more like fury, but it was a weird cocktail because it was mixed with a very weird concern. suddenly the world around you two zipped away and was replaced with one of fire, ruined buildings, complete and utter desolation of what was once a world, once compiled with many lives and now every single one was snuffed out because a different roaring fire took everything with it. both of you stood in shock for a few seconds but your cool nature was the first to crack.

"five?! five, where are we?" your voice cracked and your chest tightened, whipping your head around because you thought if you turned fast enough you would be back home.

"like hell if i know, [y/n]! why didn't you let go of me?!"

"i wouldn't have been home anyway, five! i would be just as stranded, i―we―someone needs to be alive, right? someone?" both of you seemed to have the same idea click into your minds, stumbling into weak runs to find the umbrella academy. the building had once stood grand and tall and foreboding and now it was down to the foundations. your friends, his siblings, were gone. he fell to his knees and you turned around, horrified at the world but at least free from the stinging pain of heat and dust whipping into your skin. you felt as cold as ice in a world of fire and heat because, buried amongst the broken homes, were the only family you both had. just older, and... dead. in very painful, excruciating ways.

for all those years, you thought it had been you that stranded you in the apocalypse together; you had distracted him, you had ruined it all, and you never forgave yourself. you hid it well. but five never came out with the same thought process because he didn't believe it in the slightest. he'd already been struggling to transport himself to the time he wanted. maybe you'd exasperated things just a little, but it wasn't entirely your fault. never.

you both allowed yourselves time for the mental breakdown you so dearly deserved, but the time was coming to man up and start trying to find ways to survive. joined at the hip didn't really cover how close you were over those decades, how you couldn't sleep unless you were besides each other, how you protected five because you wouldn't feel the pain and how he always patched you up while cursing you out and still kissing the wound better because it always properly calmed you down, at least more than any words could. you took the brunt of the pain, weaponizing your congenital analgesia and using it as a defensive plan. it worked. even when the handler came around, especially when the handler came around, no defense quite matched yours.

"i should've left you back near the academy building," five muttered, wrapping makeshift bandages around your... well, your practically crushed arm. his voice was gruff now, and not just from the unpleasant living situation, but you were both nearing your thirtieth birthdays. you'd both filled out. you kept gazing at him whenever he patched you up, and even though his words were sour, his touch was sweet.

"what're you looking at, dipshit."

"nothing much."

"fuck you."

"you first."

five grinned a bit. some things never changed.

"wow. this place really didn't age well." the old liberty tree spanned out in front of you with basically no windows left intact, and beyond them a black void without any electricity in the circuits. the outdoor walls were crawling with ivy, the grounds fuzzy from overgrown plants on unkempt laws, and the concrete of the structure looked about ready to crumble. you'd come here a few times in your pre-apocalyptic childhood. it had been coming down for a long time after a few bigger malls came into the picture, carrying more stores, more variety, more fast food restaurants in the food court. now its charms drew only you in as 'how sick would it be to die crushed under the ceiling of an abandoned mall?'

"it's super cool, right?" you giggled, giddy as all hell. your attitude toward liminal spaces had stayed remarkably the same over the years. always, when passing by some tired old house, you nagged five to just take a peek.

"i don't think so, no."

"well, you're friends with me, so i don't think you really have good taste, so i'm gonna ignore that comment and think you said yes." try as he might, and he desperately did, five couldn't bring himself to hate that glint in your eyes when you looked at him. pure, raw curiosity with an undertone of excitement and glee that you were exploring some boring, abandoned place with him of all people. you set down your board and took your place standing on top of it and before five could scold you for skating on very uneven ground, you took off, ducking and pulling a small ollie to get through the shattered pane of the glass main door. five sighed through his nose and followed you in, eventually greeted by the sound of your bluetooth speaker blasting something he couldn't make out by its echo.

"how could you possibly find this fun?" he almost had to shout to be heard. you were approaching again after going around the empty lobby for a few turns, just going faster and faster, losing more caution every time.

"because it's mindless and mostly not illegal!" you responded brightly. suddenly you got the fantastic idea to jump off your board and let it go flying and you followed the instinct, landing wrong on your foot and immediately heading straight for the ground. you would've landed hard, getting at least a deep bruise, if five hadn't caught you by your waist before you could break yet another bone, scoffing at your terrible decisions.

"there are millions of words in the english but none of them could ever describe just how incredible it is that you aren't dead yet," he said curtly, helping you stand back up. you were giggling.

the music was still playing and so you wrapped your arms around his neck, starting to sway and hum along to the eerily-echoing tune. he looked at you with confused horror, eyes narrowed slightly, not moving with you.

"don't give me that, shortstack!"

"i'm taller than you."

"i'm going to ignore that!" you chirped. "we're alive and out of hell, and we have been for, like, weeks now, it wouldn't kill you to dance a little bit!" your hair, bouncy from its messiness, danced almost more than you did as you moved it back and forth, singing whole-heartedly along to saint motel, keeping it a bit dialed back so that five wouldn't have his ears fully blown out by the volume. "who do you think'll see your shitty dance moves other than me? and we both know that i would be a total hypocrite if i insulted you for them."

"i don't dance."

"yeah, and i don't care. your hip won't give out if you use it for fun, fivey."

"don't... don't say that, actually." the cracks were staring to show, just as they always did with his clay pot attitude. you sputtered at the accidental innuendo.

"aw, c'mon, please? just this once?" it was no wonder that klaus was dead-set on his precious, unofficially-adopted son being in love with five, and also no wonder that diego was dead-set on keeping that same unofficially-adopted son as far away from five as possible. your puppy dog eyes were totally nauseating and deeply troubling and so he gave in, solely for the sake of his own sanity. he shut his eyes for a second, mumbling something along the lines of 'i should've killed you decades ago.' but he hugged your waist a little more purposefully and begrudgingly swayed a bit to the tune. the look of utter happiness on your face was, admittedly, kind of worth the wake-up call and following exhaustion.

"i cannot believe that you guilt-tripped me into dancing."

the happy music saw you getting a bit more creative, making up the moves as you went, whatever felt right. five let go of a little control to do the same, and found himself mildly enjoying it. would he do it again? not on his own accord. would you probably make him do it again? without a doubt. it was, however, nice to watch you enjoy yourself. he kind of wanted to dip you, but he didn't.

"you're a natural, though." clasping his hands and intertwining your fingers, you leaned back, and he found himself doing the same, both of you held upright by your grasps on the others' hands, and you started to move in a circle. for the sake of both your safety, five went about it too. walking turned into sideways jogging and you started giggling. the world around you both blurred. for five, it was just you now, just you, like it had always been. it had been a while since you'd held hands for so long but eventually it ended, much to five's dismay, and you went stumbling backward a few steps, falling hard on your ass whilst he quickly remained his balance. you were breathless for a moment after falling so suddenly, but eventually you just started laughing. five wiped his hands on his shirt, peering at you strangely.

"you didn't hear anything crack or whatever? nothing feels weird?" he spoke with no emotion in his voice and yet the words and underlying tone were careful and concerned. nobody else could hear it, but after so long, you could read his every move.

"no, nothing." you shook your head a bit, finding yourself dizzy. "nice to see you're still concerned."

he offered his hand out to you and you took it, and in a strong move, he pulled you up. "i wouldn't call it concern."

"well, then, what would you call it?"

good question.

you were sniffling and crying while trying not to sound it at all. of course, it wasn't from the pain, but from the total stress. sometimes it all just collapsed on you again and you were a hyperventilating, shaking kid again, too scared to turn off the light because the shadows freaked you out. five sat down beside you, leaning against the least-crumbling wall of the small shack you'd both been calling home.

"you're not really a crier," he began. "did something happen?"

"i-i almost got crushed and i saw my life fucking―flash before my eyes and i hated all of it. every single second. i wish i'd killed my parents, i wish i'd killed that landlord, i wish i'd killed my uncle―"

"wish all you want but that's not gonna happen, [y/n]." his voice softened. five was essentially the same as he had been when he was thirteen, just sprouted into someone who would've been one hell of a college freshman. "i wish i killed a lot of people too, but we're here, and we're here together, and―for what it's worth―i'm glad that you're alive." he settled a bit closer to you, wrapping an arm around your shoulder, pulling you, still sniveling, against him. "hating your childhood is pretty common where i'm from," he joked, successfully getting a wheezy chuckle from you, "and it's still possible to lead a decently okay life. i'm trapped in a terrible apocalypse, and it's not just external, but... it's a little better because i have someone else who's more insane to remind me that i'm right."

you chuckled yet again, snuggling against him. his warmth was better than the world's. "i think i only moved because i heard you call."

"seriously?"

"i-i mean, yeah." it was kind of hard to forget the feeling of stumbling away from a ton of hard reinforced concrete that would've left you as a reddish smear on an orange world. five's curt and somewhat annoyed call was the only thing that grounded you, and you both knew just how quick that faded.

"you really would be dead without me." his voice was quiet and deeply peeved but he didn't shy away from you, his hand remaining idly just against your hair.

"no shit, dumbass―trust me, i am well aware." you snorted to yourself and five sprouted a small amused smile on his own. eventually your smile dimmed a bit, and were reminded of the world in which you lived in, and the world from which you had come from. "why did you stick around?" your disheartened soul was reflected in those words, lined with a pure confusion. five furrowed his brow. apparently it was completely out of the realm of possibility to you for him to just care.

"... there was a lot of―"

"answer the question. please. j-just this once." five quieted a bit when he heard that. usually he was quite skilled at deflecting questions but you melted his resolve so easily. you asking a genuine question in a hauntingly low voice left five silent with no idea how to respond, even after all these years of dealing with your rollercoaster mannerisms.

"wrong place at the wrong time, i suppose." right place at the right time was better to describe it, maybe. "after you broke your ankle when we were ten, i guess i took it upon myself to make sure you didn't do any dumb shit that would end up in a gnarly death. whether you can feel it or not." so he'd appointed himself to be your protector?

"why? it wouldn't do you any good. well... it hasn't done you any good."

"do you really think i only do things if they'll give me an advantage?" five paused, not looking down to see the squinted eyes you stared at him with. "don't answer that question, actually. don't answer. it hasn't done me any good but i don't regret anything i did. not terribly, anyway."

your grin would make the cheshire cat blush.

five immediately regretted saying that. "don't let that go to your head, [y/n]."

"already there, bud."

his brow furrowed again, the corners of his lips twitching down in another frown. "alright. maybe it's partially concern. but fracturing your pelvis would be a very stupid way to die, and not worth laughing at, so i didn't want to miss out on a show." maybe there was some form of truth in that desire for a fun death, but you had that desire too, so small potatoes. it was silence between you two for a few seconds as you patted concrete dust off of your clothes and the backs of your thighs. "let me help," he said, and it was a demand and not an ill-cadenced suggestion. he stepped behind you and swiped away the strips you couldn't reach with a heavy hand. while he did so he carefully looked you over, even going to far as lifting your arms to check for any injuries. you were quite used to it by now.

"thanks," you mumbled. "still waiting for that broken leg."

"well, your plan wouldn't work anyway, because i can see your legs."

"yeah... i like my legs. i don't want one to go janky from a broken bone."

"it would be unfortunate."

"mmhm, so you agree."

five narrowed his eyes slightly, not getting what you meant for a second or two, before scoffing. "i don't think that your legs are nice."

"really?" you turned to look at him, and the teasing grin on your face was reassuring in how amused it was. you were just playing with him, but that was always the way you got him to inadvertently expel whatever he was thinking. you tilted your head, crossing your arms.

"don't give me that, [y/n], or i'll blink away and leave you here."

"there's ceiling access."

he pursed his lips. "alright, then leaving you alone here is completely out of the question, but i will find some way to make this miserable for you."

"what, why? why d'you wanna misery me?"

"you're dreadfully annoying, for one. i hate how you're always smiling, it gives you really bad wrinkles. you have the heart of a child because you're so immature and i don't know why the universe thought it would be funny to shove us two together, because god knows it would never happen normally, but here we are, much to my chagrin." five paused. you were accustomed to his rants by now. "your weird uncle-dad keeps trying to rush something which shouldn't be rushed, and i don't even know what level of weird that is but i hate being a part of it."

"rush something which shouldn't be rushed―what does that mean?" it was like you had selective hearing for the smallest freudian slips known to man. "what, do you need sixty more years to admit you've had some sort of big emotion or something?" it was mostly a jab, something meant to be funny, which was met with a stolid seriousness. you let out a near-silent 'oh' as the moment continued.

"yeah. turns out the crazy alcoholic was onto something, for the first time in his life." you snorted at the quip, nodding in agreement. both of you knew, dearly knew, that words wouldn't be the vessel of the confession, but both of you knew, dearly knew, that it was coming pretty fast. you'd just never think it would come this fast. klaus was really good at sniffing out a love arc, apparently. five felt like steel when he took your hands back into his, not because his biting sharp edges hurt you, no, and they never would, but he'd never done something in a manner such as this. with a few unspoken words the entire atmosphere of your relationship had been turned upside down and that was the scary part; he had no clue where to go from here.

"the worst part will be telling klaus he was right," you joked, swinging your arms in and out on socially-awkward instinct.

"you're telling me. he's gonna tout it around for the rest of time."

"we'll never live it down."

"i doubt you'll need to worry about that, i'll be surprised if you make it to your 16th birthday."

"you give me three years? seriously? you really think that my 58-year-old-13-year-old self can only survive three more years?"

"absolutely correct." you found yourself laughing and he found himself grinning, just slightly. the sound was pleasant, admittedly. he was more open with that now. well, barely, but it still counted. the silence that did follow this time around was almost pleasant. you were too nervous to maintain eye contact very long, so you glanced away from him and your gaze lingered on the random spot which it landed. plants had somehow found their way into the internal cracks of the floor, green shards glinting out in the pale light from the grimy sunroof.

"i never thought i'd see the day where you couldn't look me in the eyes. it's weird and i don't like it. look at me." your cheeks felt warm but you did as you were told. he smiled a little bit, and it didn't even hint at a snarky grin or smug smirk. you leaned forward and rested your forehead against his.

"i'm totally not telling klaus about this."

"neither am i, are you kidding?"

"never in my life," you giggled to yourself, graduating from holding his hands to wrapping your arms back about his neck, where it felt like they belonged. suddenly it was like he was new to embraces because his arms felt stiff when he hugged back, but he hugged back, tight. never before had you encountered something so gentle and so suffocating at the same time; gentle because he might break you, suffocating because he might lose you. neither of those would happen on his watch, of course. somehow, even with your wild self, your flaws and lack of capability to abide by laws and rules, you'd managed to charm the most level-headed, logic-addicted, cynical douchebag the world had ever seen. maybe there was some truth behind that old 'opposites attract' thing.

"do you wanna stick around this dingy place for a while longer like the psychopath you are or get food before you go to sleep so you don"t whine about being hungry?"

"am i really that predi—"

"yes."

"wow, you muttered, furrowing your brow. "i really am predictable."

"yes."

with just the will to prove him wrong you stood straighter and gave him a quick, albeit strong, kiss, and then you were right back on your feet. you caught him off-guard, that's for sure, because he looked like an android in the middle of uploading information; eyes slightly wide, brows slightly raised, pure subtlety. "how about that?"

it still took him a few seconds to respond after that, trying to regain his smug and blunt composure while also trying not to dampen the mood in any way. "you're terrible at convincing. give it another shot."

[delusionalwritingsofagay]

 Press Here for Rules

Ben Hargreeves

Head canons

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Diego Hargreeves

Head canons

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The morning shift - I Rated G I CW: none I Tags : Established relationship, fluff, comfort

Five Hargreeves

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Viktor Hargreeves

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[thealphashitter]

A Bother | Five X Male Reader | Chapter Four

“Oh my god, I’m so, so sorry are you okay?” Y/N said, taking a few moments to realize who was in front of him. He made eye contact with Five for what felt like eternity before he stood up and walked away into an alley around 20ft away from where they originally were.

Y/N after the shock disappeared he ran into the alley where he saw Five enter mere moments ago but found that there was nobody there. “What the fuck…” Y/N said as he looked around. “Hello? Five?” Y/N shouted into the empty alleyway. Maybe Marcy was right, maybe it was the missing Umbrella Academy kid. But wouldn’t he be a lot older? None of this made any sense, he wondered what really was going on-

Y/N’s thoughts were interrupted by a raccoon knocking over a few bottles, causing Y/N to jump. What was he thinking about? He couldn’t remember as the raccoon crawled closer to him, hissing. It probably wasn’t that important. “Hey there little guy” Y/N said as he rubbed his index and thumb together. Making a spspsps sound.

The raccoon hissed a bit more before running back deeper into the alley. Whatever, maybe he’ll try befriending him another day. He stood up slowly, watching the raccoon before turning out of the alleyway. 

Y/N didn’t really know where to go, all he knew is that he didn’t want to be in that house. He took out his phone and earbuds and plugged it in, hitting the youtube app and clicking on ‘My Mix’ in the mixes section of youtube and shoved it back in his pocket, hoping that it wouldn’t get too jostled around and turn off or switch the songs randomly.

Eventually Y/N got texted by his mother that dinner was ready and he headed back. Eating dinner before brushing his teeth and going to bed, dreading the next school day to come.

—--------------------------------------------------

Y/N walked into his first class after an uneventful breakfast by himself. Why did his first class have to be Algebra of all things? He wasn’t necessarily bad at it but he sure did not understand it. He’s still passing but not with good grades, just barely above a D.

Y/N noticed that everybody was in different seats than usual and looked to see what teacher he had and silently cheered as he realized he had a substitute today. And it was Mrs. Evans, the sweetest and nicest person working in this entire place. He took a free seat in the middle row closest to the window. 

Y/N Watched as the classroom slowly filled up with his classmates, keeping an eye out for the elusive and mysterious Five. Y/N’s words, not mine. He remembered in the back of his mind that he shared all of his classes with Five which was a weird coincidence. He silently hoped he’d sit near him so he could bother his new crush.

Y/N was disappointed as he saw Mrs. Evans closes the door, with Five nowhere in sight. He was about to give up and take a nap when he heard a quiet knock on the door. Him and a few of his other classmates as well as Mrs. Evans looked up and there were Five, waiting outside the classroom for somebody to open the door. Mrs. Evans got up to open the door for him, he nodded a small thanks to Mrs. Evans as he walked into the room. Y/N could tell Five was scanning the room for an empty seat. Y/N waved his hand to get Five’s attention and point to the empty seat in front of him. Five looked around, seeing as there were no more chairs he sat in front of Y/N. 

Y/N waited for Mrs. Evans to finish taking attendance, telling us to stay quiet and just do whatever. After she was done talking Y/N quickly tapped on Five’s shoulder. Five turned around and gave Y/N a glare. “What do you want?” Five snapped harshly. “Geez, chill out, have a snicker” Y/N said as he dug into his pocket and pretended to hand Five a snicker. 

Five stared at the other boy's hand and back to him, causing Y/N to giggle quietly. Five went back to glaring at Y/N as Y/N continued to giggle. “Oh you don’t want it? I’ll take it then.” Y/N pretended to open the imaginary snickers and eat it. Five looked at him with a look of confusion and disgust. “Damn dude, are you okay? You constipated or something?” Y/N said as he looked Five up and down. “What? No I- What do you want.” Five stuttered out before just asking Y/N flat out. “Nothing, I just want to bother the hot new kid.” Y/N said, pretending to admire his nails. 

Five’s face went red with Y/N assumed it was a mixture of flustered and angry. Y/N let out a slight smirk as Five just went quiet. “Anyways, how are you doing on this fine morning, sir Five?” Y/N asked with a fake British accent. Five rolled his eyes before answering, his face going back to its regular pale shade. “Fine. You?” Five said through gritted teeth which did not deter Y/N. “Pretty good, I have some eye candy I’m munching on right now so I’m feeling great.” Y/N said as he propped his chin on his hands, his gaze not leaving Five’s eyes. 

Five rolled his eyes again. Y/N reckoned that his eyes were gonna fall out at this point, which obviously did not happen. “And this eye candy is going to eat you alive if you don’t shut the fuck up.” Five said as he leaned towards Y/N. Y/N’s eyes widened before he composed himself and let out the word “Out?” He said with confidence.

“What?” Five said, backing up a bit with a confused look on his face. “Are you gonna eat me out alive? I’d imagine you’d do so while I’m alive or that’d make you a necrophiliac.” Y/N said, a small smile threatening to spill on his lips. Five just gave him a look of disgust. “What the fuck is wrong with you.”

-----------------

I hope you enjoy this, sorry it took so long

[self-hater-17-0]

Ig y/n point of view??? Idk sorry it's my first time doing this and wanted to do it before I forgot

[When five was injured in season 1 and they take him to grace and there ig infirmary, five woke up and once the siblings end up leaving five and y/n or m/n r alone together]

Yn/ m/n: ...yk when a massive star runs out of fuel, the force of gravity causes it to collapse on itself and explode. the stars remains r fired across the galaxy, at a speed of 40,000km per second, entire galaxies r outshines by the death of one star, called a super Nova

*takes a deep shakey breath before continuing still looking at the floor*

Y/n m/n: the death of u and ur health stary is more important then the end of the world to me

*the silence fills the room for a moment as he processes this cut off by us once again*

Y/n m/n: well u need more sleep so sleep some more and ists I will kill u if u dare not at least try, mental and physical rest matter dimwit

*with a flick of there fingers to fives forhead they exit the room, after processing they end up stressing thinking they said to much and that maybe there crush on five was now way to obvious to him, making them scared of rejection or what he might say later If he even acknowledges it at all that is, eventually passes out in a spare bedroom closest u can get to the infirmary and passes out due to exhaustion*

Inspired by this TikTok btw, so sorry about all the tags

[bomber-grl]

Mike Schmidt relationship headcannons !

Pairing(s): Mike Schmidt x Gn!Reader

Note! Has some plot | This is my relationship headcannons for movie Mike, stating this because I just might make video game Michael Afton headcannons aswell in the near future

Very closed off and not looking for a relationship

He had hired you to take care of Abby when he was away and that’s how you two began getting closer.

Not the best conversation starter, however when you gave him the opportunity to speak about the dream theory he starts going on about it.

Then he apologizes and begins feeling a bit unsure and awkward.

It never really advanced from there and he’d almost constantly apologize and reassure that he’d pay you soon, but you never really cared for it.

Really peaked his interest when he realized that Abby had really grown to like you and began inviting you to do things with the both of them.

You, of course accepted and eventually Mike had started developing feelings for you.

Just as you did for him.

He didnt act on them at first.

Primarily Because he doesn’t see himself in a relationship, especially not with someone like you with him.

You were amazing, and he was a sad grown man who had to care for his little sister, and not even in a way he saw proper.

So of course he shuts it down, telling himself it’d be better off that way.

However, some way, somehow you got involved with Freddy’s pizzeria and you not only managed to save him but also Abby.

Then from there it just went uphill.

He got a better job, better pay, and is able to connect with Abby easier.

Not only that but the custody battle has been leaning in his favor.

He had no one to thank but you.

You’d take Abby to school, occasionally cook for them, and you were always reliable.

One fateful evening you and Mike were just hanging out in the living room.

Talking and just watching whatever was on TV.

Then he brought up your relationship, and stated that he’d really like to start one with you, a romantic one, that is.

You of course, said yes, and he was relieved and happy at your reaction.

But then Abby came to mind, what would she think?

You asked him this almost immediately.

But he reassured and said that the final push was actually when Abby hinted/teased her older brother about your potential relationship, then ran off.

You let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding and an awkward atmosphere hung in the air but then Mike went to hold you hand and it made it semi better.

The next morning you almost immediately told Abby and she was so happy.

Which really relieved the both of you.

-

Things had changed, albeit subtly.

And although Mike wasn’t the most physically affectionate, probably due to him being pretty much touched starved and traumatized.

He tried his best to convey his affection towards you with teasing and joking around.

You’d often just enjoy the others company and bond mostly with Abby around.

If you were to ever do something even a little bit flirty around her she’d immediately be grossed out.

Which was funny, and was mentally noted to ever do again in her presence, even if it was just a kid friendly comment.

Your guy’s first kiss was pretty intimate

I mean Mike had never seemed much interested in kissing or doing anything further down the road.

However, after a particularly draining day, and horrible weather outside, Mike had offered you to stay for the night.

Abby was so excited and the three of you played with her just a little bit over her curfew then sent her off to bed.

When you were finally able to be alone, Mike, very awkwardly and a bit bashful, offered for you to sleep in his bed.

You, like the amazing person you were, rejected and said that it was fine and that he should just sleep there.

Not completely understanding that Mike didn’t mean separate, but together.

Once he bashfully explains that all you can do is mutter out an “oh” and go along with it.

Pretty awkward as you both just lay down as stiff as rods in silence.

Then you guys begin talking.

And it’s just you two talking about whatever at like 2 a.m, trying your best to keep it down.

If you decide to be bold and make a move by asking if you could cuddle with him, then he’d hesitantly agree.

Again, not because he hates you, but because he’s an awkward guy.

So once you’re settled in each others arms you start talking about each others traumas and mostly hidden things.

It’s the sleep deprivation getting to you guys.

Well once you’re both finished venting and just being vulnerable you decide to make a move and lean forward, giving him plenty of time to move if it’s not wanted.

But he didn’t, and the clash of your lips followed soon after and how drawed out it was won’t be mentioned by either of you either.

Things not only start changing and he’s side hugging you more (publicly)

Although not really into pda

And be more affectionate (as he can)

I’m sure at one point you get so comfortable with one another that although awkward moments occur, most of them spent together is just you saying cringe stuff and making him regret ever making it out alive of Freddy’s.

From then on, not only do you tease and get a worthwhile reaction but he’s always hugging and giving you cheek kisses in private.

He’s also grown fond of cuddling, just because of how close he gets to be to you.

If you were to ever tell him he’s hot.

He’d get really taken back but then laughs it off and says whatever.

(Saying this because I know those fans of him exist 😭)

Honestly it’s kind of hard for you to tell when he’s being sarcastic or not😔

He’s always making snarky and joking remarks and hard to tell when he’s just being his sassy self.

Honestly home dude is just trying his best and his relationship with you really lightened up his life even more.

Note! Should I make a pt 2 with Mike as your husband?

[moonyswoony]

A stitch in the heart

pairing: Diego hargreeves x reader

Summary: After Five’s betrayal you and Diego find unexpected comfort in each other.

Warning(s): making out, insults, humour

Your fingers trace the edge of the old, worn-out armchair, a painful reminder of all the moments you thought you once shared with him. A hollow feeling settles in your chest, and you can’t decide what hurts more—the betrayal or the fact that you actually hadn’t seen it coming.

The doorbell rings sharply, startling you from your thoughts. You hesitate before opening it, your heart sinking as you see Diego standing there. He had come straight from the Umbrella Academy’s chaotic mess, having heard about the situation from Klaus, who had filled him in on the details. Diego’s dark eyes are filled with frustration and concern as he steps into the apartment.

“I didn’t know he was that stupid,” Diego says, his voice rough with a mix of irritation and empathy. His short brown hair is slightly tousled, and his mustache gives him a rugged, determined look.

You scoff, biting back the tears that threaten to spill. “Neither did I. But hey, at least I’m not the one who’ll be dodging flying knives for a while.”

Diego’s jaw clenches, the muscles working under his skin as he processes your pain. He had always been the protector, the one to throw himself into danger without a second thought, but this was different. He couldn’t punch Five without making things worse—without hurting you even more.

“He’s an idiot,” Diego mutters, stepping closer. His presence is like a comforting weight, a reminder that not everyone in this messed-up world would abandon you. “And if he wasn’t, I’d be happy to throw him off a building for you.”

You look up at him, trying to find solace in his words, but the wound was too fresh, too deep. “You’re way too good at the ‘throwing people off buildings’ thing, Diego. I’d hate to see what you could do if you really put your mind to it.”

Diego’s jaw twitches into a reluctant smile. “Trust me, I’ve got a lot of practice. But this isn’t about me or Five or Lila. This is about you.”

“You mean it’s not about making sure Five ends up face-first in the dirt?” you ask, a hint of sarcasm in your voice.

He shakes his head, his expression serious again. “Look, I know you’re hurting. And I’m not saying Five isn’t a jerk—he is. But you don’t deserve to be dragged down by his mistakes.”

A heavy silence sits between you, filled with unspoken words and the shared history that ties you both to the people who had hurt you. Diego has his own scars, the ones Lila had left on his heart. He knew betrayal, maybe as well as you did.

“Lila…” you began, but Diego cuts you off.

“She’s not worth it,” he says sharply, his tone brooking no argument. “And neither is he.”

His words are a balm, a gentle reminder that you aren’t alone in your pain. You take a deep breath, feeling the weight of the day begin to lift, if only slightly.

Diego’s hand finally finds its way to your shoulder, a tentative touch that sends a shiver down your spine. His fingers, rough but warm, rest gently on your skin. “You don’t have to go through this alone, you know.”

You look up at him, really look at him. The scars, the bruises, the lines of worry etched into his features—Diego had always been there, in the background, watching out for you even when you didn’t realize it.

“I’m sorry about Lila,” you whisper, not really sure why you’re apologizing. Maybe because it feels like you should, because your pain is linked to his in a way you hadn’t expected.

Diego shakes his head, his expression softening. “Don’t be. That chapter’s over. Has been for a long time.”

There’s something in his eyes, something that made your heart skip a beat. He’s not lying, he had moved on. But from the way he’s looking at you, you wonder if he had been waiting for you to realize you needed to move on too.

And maybe… maybe with him.

“Diego,” you breathe, the air between you crackling with a sudden tension, a shift that makes your heart race for an entirely different reason.

His fingers tighten on your shoulder, his gaze dropping to your lips for the briefest moment before returning to your eyes. “If you ever want to forget about him,” he says, voice low and intense, “I’m right here.”

The world seemed to narrow down to the space between you, the inches that felt like miles. Your breath hitched, your heart pounding in your chest. This was the Diego you knew so well—hotheaded, stubborn, fiercely loyal Diego. The man who had been by your side through thick and thin, who was willing to pick up the pieces of your heart when they fell apart.

You take a step closer, your hand coming up to rest on his chest, feeling the steady beat of his heart under your palm. His eyes darken, and he leans in, his breath warm against your skin. The tension between you is palpable, like the air before a storm.

Then, as if on cue, he closes the gap between you two.

The kiss is urgent, his lips surprisingly soft as snow.It all feels like a desperate attempt to make something beautiful out of the wreckage of the day.

The kiss deepens, growing more fervent as you both lose yourselves in the heat of the moment. Diego’s hands roam to your back, pulling you impossibly closer, his embrace enveloping you completely. His lips move with a new, careful intensity, exploring your mouth with a touch of tenderness and need.

After a few moments, Diego pulls back slightly, his forehead resting against yours. His eyes sparkle with a playful glint, and he gives a light-hearted chuckle. “You know,” he smirks “Before Lila came along and turned everything upside down, I actually had a crush on you.”

You look at him, surprised and amused. “Seriously? You had a crush on me?”

Diego nods, grinning. “Yep, and I guess I was so busy trying to play the tough guy that I didn’t realize honesty might’ve worked out better. But hey, Five and Lila didn’t exactly set the bar high, did they?”

You laugh, shaking your head. “True, true. It’s not like they made the most convincing case for keeping things simple.”

Diego chuckles, pulling you closer again. “Exactly. And honestly, if I’m better at anything, it’s being upfront about my feelings.”

You smile, feeling the warmth of his words and the comfort of his embrace. “I guess that’s something I can definitely appreciate.”

Diego leans in for another kiss, his lips brushing against yours with renewed fervor and for the first time in a while, the future feels like something worth fighting for.

[lefteagleblizzard]

ℭ𝔯𝔲𝔰𝔥 𝔞𝔠𝔯𝔬𝔰𝔰 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔰𝔱𝔯𝔢𝔢𝔱

Mike Schmidt x male reader

Summary: Life as a college student was hectic. You had always noticed Mike Schmidt, the quiet, brooding neighbor who lived just a few houses down. Though he was about five years older than you, that gap only fueled the intrigue and admiration you felt toward him. You admired the way he balanced his responsibilities, especially his care for his younger sister, Abby. Over the years, this admiration blossomed into a deep-seated crush that you couldn't quite shake off. Today, you finally got the chance to talk to him again after so much time due to you going to college.

Warnings: Age-gap (5 years) between you and Mike. Male reader. He/him pronouns used towards the reader. Fluff. Strangers/Friends to lovers. Smut at the end. Top Mike. Bottom reader. Reader being called “good boy”. Handjob (M receiving). Anal sex.

Words count: 5000

Part 2- Part 3-Part 4-Part 5-Part 6-Part 7-Part 8- Part 9

Can also be found on wattpad and ao3

This is different from the usual gender-neutral stuff I write, and I’m sorry to those who are used to them. I’m just so sad about never being able to find a male reader story, something that I can relate to. Your support and understanding mean a lot to me!

You had always noticed Mike Schmidt, the quiet, brooding neighbor who lived just a few houses down. Though he was about five years older than you, that gap only fueled the intrigue and admiration you felt toward him.

Over the years, you often saw him in the mornings when he returned from work, his expression weary but softened when he exchanged a word or two with your father.

Those fleeting moments were enough to plant a growing crush in your heart, a mix of admiration and something deeper you couldn't quite name.

One crisp morning, as you grabbed your backpack, ready to head out to college, you ran into him.

Literally.

You were in such a rush that you barely noticed him until you bumped into his solid frame on the sidewalk.

"Whoa, sorry about that," he chuckled, a warm sound that made your heart race. His hazel eyes, always a bit shadowed with fatigue, brightening just a little at the sight of you.

His hair was slightly tousled, and there was a shadow of stubble on his chin, which somehow made him even more attractive.

The sight of him made your heart skip a beat, a reaction you were becoming increasingly familiar with but were still not quite used to.

You felt your cheeks heat up, embarrassed by your clumsiness but secretly thrilled to be talking to him. "You're in a hurry, aren't you?"

His voice was deep and warm, like a comforting blanket after a long day.

You laughed nervously, trying to play it cool. "Yeah, running late as usual. What about you? Just getting back from work?"

"Yeah," he replied, scratching the back of his neck in a way you found endearing. His movements were tired yet graceful, revealing the strain of long nights but also a quiet resilience you admired. "Long night, But hey, it's good to finally bump into you —literally."

"You're looking... good." You regretted your choice of words almost immediately, feeling your face flush with embarrassment.

Mike chuckled softly, the sound warm and comforting, as if he was genuinely pleased by your compliment. "Thanks. You look great too. College must be treating you well."

"Thanks," you murmured, trying to hide your blush and not wanting to make a fool of yourself in front of him.

"The usual chaos. It's busy, but I'm hanging in there. I guess I'm learning a lot, though some days it feels more like I'm just trying to survive."

He chuckled, nodding knowingly. "Sounds about right. I remember those days, even if they were a bit short-lived for me. Dropping out to take care of Abby was the right choice, but sometimes I wonder what it would've been like to finish."

The way he spoke, his voice tinged with a mix of nostalgia and acceptance, made your heart ache. You admired him for the sacrifices he made. "You did what you had to do. Abby's lucky to have you looking out for her."

You stood there, both hesitant yet unwilling to end the conversation. It had been a while since you'd last talked. Life, college, and his busy schedule made these interactions rare. But when they happened, they were the highlight of your week. There was a warmth to his presence, a comforting steadiness that contrasted with the chaos of your daily life.

"So, how's Abby doing?" you asked, shifting the weight of your backpack on your shoulder. You knew how much she meant to him and how hard he fought to keep her happy and safe.

"She's great," Mike said, a genuine smile breaking through his usual guarded demeanor. His eyes softened, a hint of pride and affection in them. "Growing up way too fast, though. She actually asked about you the other day.

The idea that Abby remembered you, even though you'd only met a few times, warmed your heart. You tried to picture her as you remembered-a bright, inquisitive little girl who could light up a room with her laughter. "That's sweet. I should stop by more often."

"Yeah, you should," he replied, a glint in his beautiful hazel eyes that made your heart skip a beat. There was something earnest in his tone, something that suggested he wouldn't mind having you around more often. "She misses having someone around who doesn't mind her endless questions."

"I don't mind at all," you said quickly, realizing how eager you sounded. "In fact, I like talking to her. She's a really smart kid."

"She is," Mike agreed, his expression softening further.

"And you?" The question slipped out before you could stop it. "How are things going with... you know, the custody stuff?"

A shadow crossed his face, and you regretted bringing it up. You watched as his shoulders tensed slightly, and the easy smile slipped a notch.

"It's... it's been tough. My aunt's not making it any easier," he admitted, his voice tinged with frustration. There was a pause, a moment of shared understanding of the challenges he faced. You admired his strength, how he continued to push forward despite everything.

Your temper flared at the thought of the obstacles thrown his way. "That woman is just-" You caught yourself, but not before an unsavory word slipped out.

You covered your mouth, horrified, but Mike just laughed, a sound that was more soothing than you'd anticipated.

"You're not wrong," he said, his laughter fading into a soft smile. "But it's nice to know someone's on my side. You're cute when you're mad, you know that?"

The compliment caught you off guard, heat rushing to your cheeks. You tried to brush it off with a smile, but inside, you were glowing. He noticed, of course, but chose to let it slide.

"Well, I just... I hope things work out for you, Mike. You deserve that."

His gaze lingered on you, something unreadable in his eyes. You wondered what he saw when he looked at you and if he could sense the emotions you tried so hard to keep under wraps.

"Thanks. It means a lot coming from you" Then, as if suddenly remembering something, he added, "I need to find a new babysitter for Abby. The last one quit because, well, I can't really afford much right now."

Without thinking, you blurted out, "I could do it!" you offered eagerly, almost too quickly, the words spilling out before you had a chance to reconsider.

The offer hung in the air between you, and for a moment, you worried you'd overstepped.

But you couldn't help it. The thought of spending more time with him, getting to know him and Abby better, was too enticing to pass up.

Mike studied you, his expression softening. His eyes held a mix of surprise and gratitude, and you noticed how his lips curved up slightly at the edges, almost as if he was trying not to show too much emotion. "You'd really do that?"

"Of course," you replied, trying to sound casual despite the hammering of your heart. "I mean, I have some free time, and honestly, my college roommate is loud and annoying. Plus, I'd love to help."

He smiled, and it reached his eyes this time. There was a warmth there that seemed to envelop you, drawing you in. "That'd be great. I can't promise much in terms of payment, though."

"Don't worry about it," you said, waving a hand dismissively. "I'd be happy to help. It's not about the money. I'd love to help out, really. I've missed seeing you guys around."

Your heart pounded in your chest, both from the rush of making the offer and from the hope that he would accept.

The way he looked at you then, with a mixture of gratitude and something else— something hopeful—made you believe this was the start of something more.

You felt your heart flutter, a thrilling sensation that made you wonder if maybe he felt something too. "You're really something," he said softly, almost to himself.

You shrugged, trying to appear nonchalant even as your heart soared. "Just trying to do what I can."

"Well, thanks. Really," he said, his voice earnest. "It's nice to see you again after so long.

You nodded, feeling warmth spread through you at his words. "Yeah, it's good to see you to, Mike."

As you both parted ways, you couldn't help but glance back over your shoulder Mike was doing the same, and when your eyes met, he waved. You waved back, feeling a flutter of excitement.

This new arrangement was more than just a job; it was a chance to see him, to learn more about the man who had quietly captured your heart. And maybe, just maybe, it was the beginning of something that could change both your lives for the better.

As you walked away, your mind replayed the conversation. You noticed how Mike seemed to pay close attention to your words, how he listened intently as if every word mattered. It was a rare quality, one that made you feel truly seen and heard. You couldn't help but wonder if there was more beneath the surface of his smiles and laughter, if perhaps he harbored feelings that mirrored your own

Mike's presence lingered with you throughout the day, the memory of his rare smile and warm gaze etched into your thoughts. You found yourself imagining the moments you would share while babysitting Abby, the possibility of spending more time with Mike, getting to know him on a deeper level.

As you reached campus with a heart full of excitement and a mind brimming with thoughts of Mike, you headed into the day, eager for what the future might hold.

The first day of babysitting Abby was a mix of nerves and excitement. As you approached Mike's modest home, a cozy littie house with a well-kept garden, you couldn't help but feel a rush of anticipation and a bit of anxiety. You wanted to make a good impression and hoped that Abby would like you as much as you liked her brother.

Abby greeted you at the door, her eyes wide with curiosity and a hint of shyness. She was a bright, energetic girl with dark hair and a mischievous grin that reminded you so much of Mike. Her presence was immediately infectious, and you felt any lingering anxiety melt away.

"Hi, Abby! I'm here to hang out with you while your brother's at work. How does that sound?" you asked, bending down to her level, hoping to convey friendliness and approachability.

She nodded, her eyes lighting up with enthusiasm as if she had been eagerly anticipating your arrival. "Okay! Can we play with my toys?" Her excitement was palpable, and it was impossible not to be drawn into her world.

"Of course," you replied, smiling as she grabbed your hand and pulled you inside with a surprising amount of strength for such a small person. You were grateful for her enthusiasm, feeling your own spirits lift at the prospect of spending the day with her.

The hours flew by as you played games, read stories, and even painted together. Abby had a vivid imagination, and you found it easy to connect with her. She was talkative, often sharing stories about her day and asking about yours.

Her innocence and curiosity were refreshing, a welcome escape from the complexities of adult life.

"Do you like my brother?" Abby asked innocently, her eyes wide with curiosity as you helped her with her coloring book. Her question caught you off guard, and you felt a blush creeping up your neck.

"I think your brother is a really great person," you said carefully, hoping to dodge the deeper implications of her question. You didn't want to make things awkward or too serious.

She giggled, a knowing look in her eyes that made you wonder just how much she picked up on. "He likes you too. He talks about you sometimes" Her words sent a jolt through you, a mix of excitement and hope that you struggled to keep under control.

Your heart skipped a beat at her words.

Unbeknownst to you, Mike had returned home earlier than expected. He needed to grab some pills he'd forgotten and thought he'd quickly check in on how things were going. As he stepped inside, he heard the sound of Abby's laughter echoing through the house, drawing him toward the living room.

Peeking inside, Mike found you and Abby sprawled on the floor, surrounded by crayons and papers.

Abby was in the middle of telling a story, using her drawings as illustrations, her eyes alight with creativity. You listened intently, encouraging her with nods and comments, clearly engrossed in her imaginative tale.

For a moment, Mike simply stood there, watching the scene unfold before him. His heart swelled with warmth and admiration as he saw the joy on Abby's face, the ease with which you interacted with her. It was a sight he hadn't realized he longed to see, and it stirred something deep within him.

Seeing you there, so effortlessly connecting with Abby, made him fall even more in love with you. It wasn't just your kindness or the way you made Abby laugh, it was the way you seemed to understand her, to know exactly how to make her feel valued and cherished.

Mike cleared his throat, stepping into the room. "Looks like you two are having fun."

You looked up, surprised but pleased to see him. "Hey, Mike. We're just finishing up Abby's latest masterpiece."

Abby beamed at her brother, waving her drawing triumphantly. "Look what we made!”

He approached, crouching beside you to examine the masterpiece. "I love it.”

Abby beamed, and you couldn't help but feel a sense of pride at her joy. "We make a good duo," you agreed, catching Mike's eye. There was something in his gaze, a warmth and appreciation that made your heart flutter.

"Thanks for today," Mike said, his voice low enough for only you to hear. "It means a lot to see her so happy"

"It was my pleasure," you replied, feeling your cheeks heat up under his scrutiny. "She's a wonderful kid."

As the days turned into weeks, your bond with both Abby and Mike deepened. You found yourself looking forward to each visit, eager to spend time with Abby and, more secretly, to see Mike. He was kind, patient, and had a dry sense of humor that often caught you off guard and made you laugh until your sides hurt.

Abby quickly became a friend, often sharing her thoughts and ideas with you. "Do you want to see my drawing?" she'd ask, holding up a colorful sketch that she'd made with all the innocence and creativity of a child.

"Wow, Abby, that's amazing!" you'd respond, genuinely impressed by her creativity. "You've got a real talent." Her pride in her work was infectious, and you felt a deep sense of fulfillment knowing you were making a positive impact in her life, fostering her confidence and creativity.

Meanwhile, your interactions with Mike grew more frequent and meaningful. Sometimes, after Abby had gone to bed, you and Mike would sit in the living room, sharing a beer or a cup of tea, discussing everything from music to movies to life's challenges. These moments became the highlight of your day, a chance to unwind and connect on a deeper level.

One evening, as you settled onto the couch after a long day, Mike handed you a steaming mug of tea, his fingers brushing yours briefly. The contact sent a jolt of electricity through you, and you wondered if he felt it too. Your heart skipped a beat at the possibility, and you felt a warmth spreading through your chest.

"You're really easy to talk to," Mike said, his voice sincere, cutting through the quiet hum of the room. "I don't get that a lot." His admission made your heart swell, knowing that you were someone he felt comfortable with, someone he valued.

"I feel the same way, Mike," you admitted, feeling a warmth in your chest that was becoming all too familiar. "It's nice having someone who gets me and doesn't think I'm weird for my horror movie obsession."

You wanted him to know that you felt a connection, a shared understanding that was rare and precious.

He chuckled, shaking his head, his eyes twinkling with amusement. "I think it's cool. Most people just give me funny looks when I tell them I enjoy those films." His smile was infectious, and you couldn't help but smile back, feeling a sense of camaraderie and mutual understanding.

"Then they're missing out," you said, a smile playing on your lips, enjoying the banter and the ease with which you could share these moments with him.

You found yourself opening up to Mike in ways you hadn't with anyone else, revealing dreams and fears that you usually kept hidden.

There was a trust between you, a sense of safety that encouraged honesty and vulnerability.

"I always wanted to be a writer," you confessed one night, surprised by your own admission. The words felt heavy and significant, a part of yourself that you hadn't shared with many people. "But I don't know if I'm good enough."

Mike looked at you thoughtfully, his gaze steady and encouraging, as if he could see the potential within you. "I think you'd be great. You have a way with words, and you see things differently. That's a gift." His words filled you with a warmth that lingered long after the evening had ended, a validation that resonated deeply with you.

You often caught yourself daydreaming about him, replaying conversations and imagining what it might be like to tell him how you really felt.

The movie you've found online and that you were currently watching, an old, obscure horror film, played on his TV. The film was terrible, with laughable special effects and wooden acting, but it provided ample opportunity for humor.

You tried to focus on the movie, but you found yourself constantly distracted by Mike. The way his eyes crinkled when he laughed, the sound of his chuckle, and the way he seemed genuinely relaxed in your presence made you feel special and welcomed.

"There's something about these films that just never gets old," Mike said, his eyes still glued to the screen as a particularly ridiculous scene unfolded. "I mean, look at that monster. It looks like it was made from papier-mâché. Did they really think that scene would be scary?" Mike chuckled, shaking his head. His laughter was contagious, a sound that filled the room with warmth and lightened the weight of the day.

"Right?" you replied, though your focus was more on him than the film. You watched the way his smile lingered, the subtle way his body leaned toward you as if drawn by an invisible force.

You were lost in thought, contemplating the words that had been on the tip of your tongue for weeks. Watching him enjoy himself, knowing that you were part of the reason he could unwind, filled you with a sense of pride and affection that was hard to ignore.

"There's something I need to tell you," you began, your voice steady but your heart racing. The words were heavy on your tongue, but you knew it was time to speak your truth.

His expression shifted slightly, a flicker of surprise crossing his features. He sensed the seriousness of your tone and straightened, giving you his full attention.

"What's on your mind?" His voice was calm and steady, a reassurance that made the confession feel a little less daunting.

You took a deep breath, gathering your courage and pushing past the fear of rejection. "I really like spending time with you, Mike. And not just as a friend. I've felt this way for a while now." The admission hung in the air between you, a truth that couldn't be taken back.

For a moment, Mike looked at you with wide eyes, clearly caught off guard by your confession, His initial surprise was evident, and you could see the conflict playing out in his mind. He opened his mouth to speak but seemed to struggle to find the right words.

His thoughts were a jumble of emotions and concerns. The age difference between you, Abby, and his financial struggles weighed heavily on him. He didn't want you to feel tied to him, not because he didn't feel anything for you, but because he knew he couldn't give you everything you deserved.

"... I didn't expect this," he finally said, his voice laced with uncertainty. "I care about you a lot, but... it's complicated. You're younger than me. I have a lot of responsibilities with Abby and work. There's a lot I can't give you, and I don't want you to feel stuck because of me. You deserve better" His words were hesitant, filled with an internal struggle that made your heart ache for him.

You understood his hesitation, could see the conflict in his eyes, but you also saw the way he looked at you, the warmth and affection that couldn't be hidden. It was enough to give you hope, to make you want to show him that you didn't care about the obstacles, only about him.

Gently, you moved closer to him, closing the space between you. His eyes widened slightly, but he didn't pull away. Instead, he seemed frozen, waiting to see what you would do next.

Reaching up, you cupped his cheek with your hand, feeling the roughness of his stubble against your palm. "I just want to be here with you." Your voice was soft but firm, a quiet promise of your intentions.

Then, slowly, you leaned in and pressed your lips to his. It was a gentle, tentative kiss, one that held all the feelings you hadn't been able to put into words. For a moment, Mike seemed surprised, his body tensing at the unexpectedness of it all. But then, he melted into the kiss, his hesitation giving way to something deeper.

His hand found your waist, his fingers tightening slightly as he pulled you closer, closing any remaining distance between you.

The kiss was slow and tender, a shared moment that spoke volumes about what words couldn't convey.

You felt him relax against you, his internal conflicts momentarily forgotten as you both gave in to the feelings you had been harboring for so long.

His other hand reached up to gently cradle your head, deepening the kiss as he finally allowed himself to accept what was between you.

When you finally pulled away, breathless and heart racing, you looked into his eyes and saw the worry and doubt had been replaced by something softer and more hopeful.

"Well, that was unexpected," Mike said softly, breaking the silence. His voice was a gentle rumble, carrying a hint of wonder and disbelief.

"In a good way, I hope?" you replied, your own voice barely above a whisper.

"In a very good way," he assured you, his lips curving into a smile that sent a flutter of joy through you.

"I've wanted to do that for a long time," you admitted, a small smile playing on your lips as you stayed close, unwilling to let the moment end.

"Me too," he confessed, his voice barely above a whisper. "l'm still scared about what this means, but I know I don't want to lose what we have."

You leaned in closer, feeling his breath mingle with yours, and captured his lips in another kiss. This one was softer, more lingering, a gentle exploration of the connection between you. It was a silent affirmation of the feelings you both shared, a testament to the bond that had grown between you over time.

You felt his hands slide up your back, pulling you even closer, while you wrapped your arms around his neck, reveling in the warmth and security of his embrace. The kiss deepened, and you lost yourself in the sensation of being so close to him, of sharing in this moment of intimacy and understanding.

A soft sound escaped your lips, a quiet sigh of contentment, and you felt him smile against your mouth. There was a playfulness to his touch now, a sense of joy that mirrored your own.

"Shh," he whispered teasingly, pulling back slightly, his eyes sparkling with amusement.

Mike's lips moved against yours with a growing urgency, his own quiet moans mingling with yours. He tried to keep quiet, pressing soft kisses against your lips to muffle your own sounds, though the effort only served to heighten the sensation, a delicious tension that wound tighter with each passing moment.

His efforts to remain quiet were punctuated by low, throaty grunts, each one a reminder of the passion that simmered between you.

The quiet of the room was punctuated by soft gasps and whispered names, a symphony of affection that crescendoed in perfect harmony.

With a gentle tug, he guided you onto his lap, his touch firm yet careful, as if handling something both precious and fragile. The movement was fluid, instinctive, a seamless continuation of the magnetic pull that had drawn you together on the porch. Your knees settled on either side of him, bringing you chest to chest, your faces inches apart. The heat of his body seeped through your clothes, a tangible reminder of the passion simmering just beneath the surface.

His hands found their place on your legs, fingers splayed to support and explore, tracing slow, deliberate paths along the fabric that covered your skin. It was as though he sought to memorize every contour, every curve, feeding the curiosity that had lingered in the recesses of his mind for years wondering how it would feel to finally hold you close.

You leaned in, capturing his lips with yours in a kiss that was both tender and insistent, a mingling of breath and heartbeat that spoke of shared longing and mutual surrender. The world outside faded further into oblivion, leaving only the two of you entwined in a dance of exploration and affection.

His tongue slipped into your mouth, exploring with a curiosity that had been held in check for too long. The sensation was intoxicating, a dance of intimacy that spoke of all the moments he had wondered, all the times he had imagined what it would be like to taste you.

Mike's quiet grunts of pleasure were a symphony to your ears. You could sense the tension in him, the effort it took to maintain control even as his own desires threatened to overwhelm him.

His fingers brushed over your back, tracing the line of your spine, before moving to explore the curve of your waist and the strength of your thighs.

You mirrored his exploration, your hands finding purchase on his shoulders, feeling the tension and release of muscle beneath your touch. Your fingers traveled to his neck, threading through his hair, drawing him even closer as the kiss became more fervent. It was a symphony of sensation-a blending of warmth, breath, and the gentle hum of shared affection that enveloped you both.

It was as if time itself had slowed, allowing you to savor each second, each heartbeat, as you became one in a language unspoken yet deeply understood.

His hands were slowly gliding all over your hips and lower back now, and they eventually made their way down to rest on your ass.

He squeezed, causing you to grind down against him and you moaned. You started prepping with kisses on his face, his stumble scratching your lips occasionally. Mike groaned in response, his eyes fluttering shut for a minute. You began a slow rhythm of rocking your hips against him, his head falling back to rest on the back of the couch.

"Good boy," Mike murmured against your lips, his voice a low, soothing rumble that vibrated through you. It sent a shiver down your spine, your heart swelling in response to the intimacy of the moment.

Mike's hands, confident yet gentle, found their way beneath the hem of your shirt, a silent question hanging in the air as his fingers brushed against bare skin. You nodded, granting permission. The fabric lifted, sliding over your skin with a whisper, leaving you vulnerable and exposed, yet utterly safe in his embrace.

His touch was electrifying, a gentle exploration of the expanse of your chest, the warmth of his hands grounding and exhilarating all at once.

You leaned up and captured Mike’s lips again in a bruising kiss, moaning into his mouth. His hips bucking up into yours as you quickened the movement of your hips against his.

He was trying to pull you even closer against his body to increase the friction between the two of you as much as possible.

He began peppering open-mouthed kisses all over your chest and collarbones. You sighed, and laced your fingers in his hair, relishing in the feeling of his lips all over you.

He began sucking on one of your nipples, moving one of his hands to play with your other, which earned him a suppressed moan from you and caused you to throw your head back. You tugged on his hair, and it only seemed to make him even more enthusiastic with his movements.

He suddenly stood up, moving his arms to hold onto you tightly as you gasped, but landed back onto the couch almost instantly. You were now laying on your back and still looking up at him as Mike reached to pull his gray shirt off.

He was so handsome.

He began undoing his belt and the button to his jeans, pushing them down his legs. He kicked the jeans off and kneeled down, placing a hand on your thigh and looking at you.

“Can I?” he asked. You didn’t waste a second nodding your head, and you watched as he took his time to pull off your jeans and underwear, throwing them onto the floor beside his own discarded clothes.

Mike didn’t take his eyes off of you for a single second, wanting to admire the sight of you and he moved so that he was now on top of you. He now had you pinned down against the couch cushion, and you felt your own heartbeat inside your eardrums.

He leaned down to kiss you again, his enthusiasm from earlier returning as he deepened the kiss instantly.

He shifted slightly, reaching over to a small drawer built into the side table next to the couch. You watched curiously as he pulled out a small bottle of lube. The position was a bit awkward, and you couldn't help but give him a puzzled look, wondering why it was there instead of in his room.

Mike caught your expression and stuttered slightly, a hint of a blush coloring his cheeks. "Uh, well, I keep it here because of Abby. She tends to rummage around my room looking for toys or paper to draw on."

You giggled at the thought, imagining Abby innocently sifting through Mike's things, completely unaware of what she might find. "That makes sense," you said with a smile, amused by his predicament.

He chuckled along with you, the tension in the air dissolving into something more playful and intimate. With a deft motion, he flicked open the cap of the bottle and poured a small amount onto his fingers, his movements careful and deliberate.

You watched, fascinated, as he spread the substance between his fingers, his focus returning to you with a renewed intensity. There was something thrilling about the trust and care in his actions, a silent promise that you were in good hands.

"Are you sure about this?" he asked softly, his gaze steady and reassuring.

You nodded, feeling your heart race with anticipation and excitement. "Absolutely" you replied, meeting his eyes with unwavering confidence.

His hand slowly trailed from its place at your side, down your hip before moving it to the space between your thighs. You gasped slightly when you felt his touch on your dick, causing fireworks to set off all throughout your body.

You moaned into his mouth now that Mike was touching you exactly where you needed him and he picked up the pace, pumping you as you began to let out soft moans at his touch. He flicks his finger over your tip, which was now leaking profusely.

Your hand returned itself to tangle in his hair while your other made its way to his shoulder to steady yourself.

“Does that feel good, baby?” He questioned, and you could’ve swore he was smirking against your lips.

You whined and nodded slightly. You had very little control over your reactions at this point, and Mike was well aware of this. He quickened his pace once again, and you were beginning to squirm underneath him.

It seemed like he was having a lot of fun at this point, amused by all of the reactions he was dragging out of you. You weren’t sure how this could get any better when he had maneuvered his hand lower, beginning to thrust his middle finger deep into your hole.

Another loud moan, muffled by your own hand, escaped your lips and you squeezed your eyes shut at the sensation, clenching your thighs together around his hand.

He pulled his head away and began biting your jaw, sucking hard enough that it will definitely leave a mark tomorrow, but you were too focused on his finger moving inside of you to care.

Mike then added his ring finger and you whined loudly, tugging on his hair. He let out a groan, and began fucking you faster, causing you to come into his hand, and onto your stomach.

Your back arching off of the couch and your fingers digging into his shoulder, but he didn’t seem to mind one bit.

He was only focused on you, and he would do anything to indulge you at the moment. He pulled his fingers out of you after riding out your climax and shifted above you a bit. Your entire body flooded with warmth and you were panting.

Your recovery was cut short by Mike grinding into you, the length of his cock rubbing against you.

A soft, involuntary groan escaped his lips, signaling his turn.

He pulled back to look at you and his expression was questioning, waiting for an answer before going further with anything.

You whimpered out a small please and that was all it took before he was slowly sinking his cock inside of you.

He threw his head back and groaned, his cock twitching inside of you. You whined at the feeling and bit your lip, squeezing your eyes shut. He slowly bottomed out inside of you and kept still, Pausing to admire you, lost in your serene, blissed-out state, like a masterpiece in a moment of pure tranquility before he began thrusting into you.

“You gonna be a good boy for me?” He groaned out, leaning his head down to speak directly into your ear.

Your eyes shot open when you heard him, whimpering and quickly nodding your head, you were unable to speak, all you that was coming out of your mouth were the most pathetic whines, whimpers, and pants. Hearing him talk like this made you clench around him, which in turn caused him to slam into you faster.

“All mine, every bit of you,” he declared, his words sending shivers down your spine. You bit down hard on your bottom lip, trying to stifle any more sounds that might escape

You wrapped your legs around his hips, your body bouncing each time he thrusted into you, each time even harder than the last.

You and Mike were drenched in sweat, looking like you just conquered an epic adventure.

Your back was continuously arched off of the couch as he kept railing into you.

Your entire body was tingling with pleasure, and you knew you could get addicted to this feeling.

Mike slamming into you at just the right angle, the feeling of his body moving against yours, and before you knew it, Mike had reached his hand down between your bodies to begin stroking faster and faster, and each time a new sound came from your mouth, devoured from his own mouth.

You were officially done for after that. It was all too much, but it was so, so good.

“Please cum for me, my sweet boy. C’mon.” Mike gritted out, and that was all you had needed to hear.

You clenched around Mike’s cock and you came, your eyes rolling on the back of your head. All you could do while riding out your orgasam was squirm from the overstimulation, Mike still pounding into you as he was chasing his own orgasm.

Feeling the tightness of your body, he couldn't hold back any longer, his own release spurting deep within you.

Mike, who had been resting on top of you, shifted to lie beside you, the couch barely wide enough to accommodate both of you. His chest rose and fell rhythmically, a mirror to your own breaths as you both began to calm in the quiet aftermath

Your mind was a whirlwind of thoughts and emotions, the reality of what had just transpired between you and Mike barely beginning to settle in. It felt surreal, like a dream spun from the depths of your imagination, and yet the solid warmth of Mike beside you was a comforting reminder that it had indeed happened.

As you lay there, lost in your thoughts, you felt a gentle nudge against your cheek. Mike was nuzzling you, his stubble a rough but comforting texture against your skin. The affectionate gesture pulled you back to the present, grounding you in the moment and dispelling any lingering disbelief.

He turned his head slightly, capturing your lips in a quick, tender kiss that spoke of both contentment and lingering desire. When he pulled back, a hint of shyness flickered in his eyes, an endearing contrast to the confidence he had shown just moments before.

"Hey," he murmured softly, his voice barely above a whisper in the quiet room. "Do you want to sleep in the bed with me? The couch isn't exactly comfortable for the night."

His invitation caught you off guard, a warmth spreading through you that had nothing to do with the lingering heat from earlier. A smile broke across your face, broad and genuine, as you nodded, the simple gesture carrying a weight of unspoken emotion.

"I'd like that," you replied, your voice infused with a joy that you couldn't hide even if you wanted to.

Note: If you liked this story please leave a comment, I love reading them <3. Next on the list is a Josh Futturman fic from a request on wattpad.

[grave-z-boy]

If they didn’t want me to want to fuck William Afton they should not have cast Mathew lillard

[seveett]

ONE MORE .

seveett .

Starring…??;; (ftm) Micheal Schmidt x AMAB reader

Genre...??;; Smut, hardcore sex 👍🏽 (short, sorry..)

Warnings…??;; AFAB terms used (cunt, clit, pussy.), (Semi?) Public sex, Cowgirl pos, Overstimulation, Breeding kink, Marking, Multiple orgasms, Belly bulge .

(fem aligned DNI.)

The chair let out a high pitched squeaking sound, shaking a bit with the aggressiveness of Mike bouncing on your cock. Moans and whimpers fall from his mouth, face buried into your shoulder.

His body ached but the feeling of your nails digging his hips encouraged him to keep moving, chants of your name rolled off his tongue, soaked cunt clenching around your length.

Slick coated Micheal’s thighs from previous orgasms, his insides already filled with your cum from previous rounds, a bulge forming in his stomach.

“ One more , Please . ” is what he would always say although it was never just ‘One more’, he always wanted more, he could never get enough of your fat cock dragging along his warm walls.

the loud sound of skin smacking against skin filled the room, thought you were too caught up in the fact that your bodies molded together, as if you were meant to stay like that forever.

Mike’s pace started to get sloppy, only lifting himself up a little then immediately slamming back down onto your length; pussy pulsing around you.

Your fingers found its way to his puffy clit, rubbing circles, a loud guttural moan coming from Mike.

The next thing you new Micheal was convulsing and gushing, his bouncing coming a temporary stop, a groan being pulled from you as he continued to suck you in.

He inhaled sharply before going back to ride you, his bounce harsher this time, determined to make you cum.

it only took a few more of these movements until your seed spilling inside his cunt, a white ring forming where you two are connected, cum oozing out.

You both stayed there for a moment, breathing heavily into each others necks before he lifted himself up again, starting off at a slow pace before getting quicker.

“ One more , Please just one more . ” Mike begged, and how could you ever say no to him?

even though you both knew this wasn't the last round, you still agreed.

᪤; works belong to seveett, do not translate, copy or repost anywhere.

dt:: @shaesbby

[redcoralpot]

Tougher Than Nails - Mike Schmidt X M!Reader

Warnings/Details: NSFW content, implied substance abuse, alcohol, cowboy!reader, hankie/cowboy hat code.

Summary: Mike goes to a bar downtown in hopes of getting his mind off of court, but instead finds something much healthier.

A/N: Everyone should thank my boyfriend for this idea; he's always the one that reminds me that I am technically a 'cowboy'. He saves a horse very often.

Word Count: 1.8K

-

-

Bars weren’t really Mike’s thing. Any alcohol he’s ever had tasted like crap, and becoming an alcoholic would just be another check on Aunt Jane’s list to prove to the court that he wasn’t suitable for custody. Hell, he swore her perfume was still clinging onto his nose hairs, and all he wanted to do was escape her. Escape reality, too. Mike remembered when his father used to do just that after Garret disappeared, drowning himself in the bitter liquid at night, his speech slurred. That’s why he was here, at a bar in downtown Afton, while Maxine stayed with Abby. He was desperate.

The building was crowded, delightful chatter and jazz music filling the air. Lights were strung along the wooden walls, narrowly dodging the black and white photos hanging by themselves. More customers squeezed in behind him; Mike frantically searched for any open spot in the room. Hallelujah– a single stool was left vacant near the serving counter, and Mike shuffled into it, shoulders tense. The bartender seemed to notice his presence, as she leaned towards the man, still shaking another person’s drink. 

“You’re a new face,” she rattled, “may I see your license?”

Mike fumbled with his wallet, sliding the card for her to see, “Uh, sure.”

“Right, you’re all clear; would you like to open a tab?”

A man cut in before he could answer, and for the first time, Mike got a good look at the person sitting beside him, “Just add whatever he orders to mine, Molly.” 

She shrugged, the key hanging from her left pocket jingling, “Easier for me.”

You chuckled, the brim of your hat covering your eyes. It was decorated with embroidery and leather, complimenting your purple button up shirt, though that was partially hidden by a black vest. Two hankies hung out of your back, left pocket, similar to Molly’s keychain. One was rust colored, but the other was a complimentary gray; Mike thought it was an interesting stylistic choice. 

“I’ll just have a beer, thanks.”

As the bartender turned, scribbling in a notebook, you inquired, “So, what’s a fine boy like you doing ‘round these parts?”

Mike grabbed the foaming beer that was placed in front of him, “I live nearby.”

“That’s not the only reason, is it?”

He hesitated to answer, instead choosing to take a long sip of the beverage. It burned down his throat, the flavor making his lips curl and his head a little more dizzy. Somehow, it loosened his will, and he found his lips moving without his permission. Your energy was just hypnotizing; he felt himself being pulled in.

“Needed a break from stress,” Mike admitted, picking at the glass’ label.

You cocked your head to the side, your hat tipping upward, “Just ‘cause you’re in a hole, doesn’t mean you gotta keep digging. Alcohol isn’t the cure to what you’re feelin’.”

“What am I supposed to do? Not even my medicine works anymore.”

“I go here for stress relief too,” you assured, downing a shot, “but not necessarily for the drinks.”

Your hand hovered over the small of his back, looking at him for consent. When he didn’t move away, you settled your fingers there, feeling a shiver run through Mike’s body. Some of the previous tension released from his shoulders, and he almost leaned back in relief. Many of the customers in this bar were paired with the same sex, unlike most of the movies he’d seen that included the subject. So, he supposed it wouldn’t look too weird if he did.

You elaborated, “People can be cruel, can’t they, sweetheart? Comin’ to a place like this, where everyone’s like me in some way or another, is a damn good bonus.”

“Like you?”

“Y’know,” you gestured to your handkerchiefs, “queer and such.”

He paused, “Ah.”

“You didn’t know this was a boy bar?”

Mike replied, “I kinda just looked up the closest bar to my house.”

…

“Good to know.” Your hand fell away from his back.

He almost chased it. Mike liked the feeling, the weight of your fingers pressing into such an intimate spot. However, he wasn’t tipsy enough for that, and controlled himself. He watched as you spoke to Molly, the lady’s eyes flicking towards him and back, and you slipped her the money needed to cover the tab. You tipped your hat towards Mike, a respectful way to put distance between you, before disappearing into the suffocating crowd. Molly side eyed him, sweeping away his bottle, before leaving as well. Mike swallowed, pulling loose skin from his bottom lip with his teeth. It was now, or never– perhaps alcohol wasn’t the only way, after all. You were right. 

Mike could still see the very top of your hat swerving above the crowd, and he trailed after it to the best of his ability. A random girl almost elbowed him in the face, and he was sure his shins would be bruised after tonight. Your shadow was reflecting in the glass door, growing fainter and fainter as you walked further away, your hips swaying. Mike pushed it open, the vision dissolving, and cold air stung his cheeks. The moon reflected off of car hoods, the only way he was able to see where he was running. His hand reached out and grabbed your arm, as you flinched.

Mike’s ears were red, probably from the alcohol, and you stared at him, “What’re you doing?”

“I don’t know,” was the only answer you got before your collar was jerked forward.

Your lips crashed violently with his; your teeth clicking as he struggled to pull you closer. Mike was still fisting your shirt as you brought your hands to cup his jaw and the back of his neck, trying to gentle the kiss. 

You mumbled against his mouth, “Better not be some experiment of yours, pretty boy.”

“Nope,” he whispered, the aftertaste of whiskey on his tongue.

His back hit the side of your car, and his hands moved from your collar to swinging his arms around your neck. Your knee found its way in between Mike’s thighs, pressing against his crotch, and his groan was swallowed by your lips. Mike whined when you trailed down, aiming instead for his neck. Dark marks and bites soon decorated the pale flesh, his blood dripping a contrasting splash of color. 

Tugging on his earlobe, you challenged, “Gonna come back to my place?”

Mike doubted he ever agreed to something so quickly.

The drive was long, too long in his opinion. Though, it was most likely only fifteen minutes, at most. Mike didn’t even have to walk up the driveway to your cabin; his legs were locked around your hips as you carried him through the door and up the stairs. He ground his groin against you, searching for any possible friction. You tossed him onto your bed, unbuckling your belt, holding it taut. The man in front of you wiggled back and spread his legs to make room for you. You snickered at how willing Mike was, considering his hesitation when you first met.

You regularly kept lube on the bedside table, just to be prepared for when you brought men home from the bar. However, this one was different in a way you had trouble putting into words, other than positive. His thighs shook as you massaged the liquid into his hole, a hand covering his mouth to prevent you from hearing his noises. Ah, now that wouldn’t do, would it?

In response, you tugged his hand off of his mouth, “Lemme hear you.”

Such pretty sounds from a pretty mouth, it was truly a shame. When Mike immediately went back to covering them up, you slid your fingers out of him, instead reaching for your abandoned belt. His eyes trailed after your hands as they bound his wrists together in front of him, almost akin to handcuffs. Mike couldn’t see much of your expression after your head dipped down, only the shit-eating grin playing on your lips. Of course, that was before you took your hat off by the crown and placed it firmly on his head, though it was a tad too big for him.

“Why don’t you keep that safe for me, sweetheart?”

For a second, Mike was confused. Keep it safe? Just what were you planning on doing? He felt a grip on his waist, right before his world spun around him, and the positions were practically reversed. The guard was now sitting on top of you, or more so your crotch, his thighs caging in your hips. Mike’s hair was disheveled and the light on the ceiling created a sort of halo around him, and fuck, did you think he was pretty. Only a few select people had ever gotten to wear your hat, and you could confidently say that he was the most beautiful in it.

You unbuttoned your jeans, letting your cock slip through the opening, “You ready?”

“I’ve never done this before.”

You had a grip on his waist again, slowly guiding him down. You didn’t thrust, didn’t force him to go fast, and allowed him his proper time to adjust, “How’s that feelin’?”

“G-good,” he shuddered, precum leaking from his tip, “think ‘m ready.”

“You haven’t seen the brunt of it yet, boy!” You grunt, thrusting the rest of you inside, brushing against Mike’s prostate. 

The man on top of you moaned, and the sound was so uncharacteristically loud that even he seemed surprised by it. Mike leaned down, resting his tied fists on your chest in order to keep his balance. His sweat dampened your collarbones, his drool smearing on your neck, and the pathetic excuse of a guard tried leaving kisses over the areas he could reach. You soon found a rhythm to your thrusts; groans were punched out of your throat on their own.

Mike could feel heat rushing through his brain, bringing tears that stuck to his eyelashes, covering any thoughts or hesitance he may have had before. That wasn’t enough for it– it spread like wildfire down his body, down to where your fingers were leaving bruises, and down to his red, leaking dick. Something deep was brewing inside of him, nothing he’s felt since his hormonal teenage years. Hell, he didn’t even have time to process it when you kissed his cheek, whispering in his ear that he’s such a needy slut; it exploded.

When he finally came to, he could feel his thighs twitching and your heaving, sticky abs below him. His eyelids felt heavy, and all he wanted to do was stay there with you. You were rubbing circles into his back, attempting to pull out, but a grumble from Mike made you stop. In fact, you were saying things, but it sounded muffled and far away. He took great comfort in your voice, no matter what you were talking about. It was getting farther and farther away, yet still managed to follow him into his dreams. For the first time since the incident with Garret, he did not have a nightmare. 

-

Taglist: @cannabrisano @kai_beanz @fandomz-brainrot @slimemakermas

[eternal-armin]

SO, HOW SHOULD i begin this?

this is the first time i'm going to do a multi-part fic that goes beyond like 2 or 3 parts (rip to the chandelier fic.) bear with me ;;;; but i'm obsessed with everything everywhere and i wanted to do something with the abilities evelyn and joy specifically have. and, of course, the angst that can come from it. looked over this as much as i could but im exhausted so my apologies for any errors ;;;

pairing : five hargreeves x male/transmasc reader [he/him pronouns]

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where : five is instantly intrigued by the eighth sparrow, a kid just like himself, which makes him try to seek him out specifically; nothing better than a second opinion about time from another person who knew its intricacies, right? well, he... may have gotten more than he bargained for.

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warnings : future mentions of trauma, fighting and injury (specific mentions of choking), existentialism, reader is just exhausted of life and shit in general, future cheesiness and such because i said so, depression, a whole lot of 'if i can bend reality to my will then how much does it really matter' kind of questioning (later on for the most part.)

the disheartening sight of seven other people—ahem, sorry, and one very confusing cube—was made endlessly puzzling by the appearance of a kid behind them. someone who looked five's age. physically, anyway. they both seemed equally entranced by the other; the kid's eyes were wide, his lips slightly parted, as if seeing someone he had been missing for decades. he furrowed his brow a bit, cocking his head, and klaus found himself peering where five glared.

"well, would you look at that? they've got a little brother, too!"

"zip it, klaus," he hissed, though with a certain degree of gentleness in his voice, even excluding the volume he had to use. looking back at the balcony, he was wearing more casual clothes with a sort of... varsity jacket of the sparrow academy's traditional colors and emblems. he was a sparrow, meaning he was born in 1989, meaning he was around thirty years old. so why did he look thirteen? it clicked then, suddenly; his power could have something to do with time. five felt instantly that he needed to speak with him. and if it needed to be done by force, then...

hands crossed neatly over his lap, barely restraining that very obvious agitation, ben chimed in with, "dad, who the hell are these assholes?"

a chorus of "shit" rang out amongst the umbrellas. five stared at him with the same amount of emotion as usual, mostly overrun by confusion, however his sentimentalities ended there. that balcony, barely a few yards from where five stood, held something—someone, rather—that could be an answer to his predicament. or at least help figure out if he could retire or not. if this world was safe enough to stay in. there was a whole host of colorful characters. if he was the sparrows' number eight, what exactly inspired reginald to adopt him as well? or was it just sort of a convenience thing?

luther stepped forward along with klaus. "is that really you?"

no amusement struck ben. if anything, he somehow managed to look more annoyed.

"and who are the weirdos on the balcony!"

"they are the sparrows. my children." reginald's controlled, vaguely irritated voice was such a contrast to diego's harsh tone.

much to five's chagrin this moment was a bit more important than staring at a boy. he turned on his heel, narrowing his eyes at the old man. "i'm sorry, what do you mean your children? that's not possible, old man."

"of course it is! i think i'd know, wouldn't i?"

well. something was very wrong, wasn't it?

the sound of footsteps and shuffling caught his attention and yet again he looked back forward; all of the sparrows once situated haphazardly on the balcony now stood across the tile threshold. the kid was shorter than he expected, in all honesty, and he seemed to be the least serious out of all his siblings—not to say that he looked like he was having fun or that he was laughing, but that he didn't want to fight. he looked like he would avoid it at every cost.

"everyone else can see ben, right?"

"cute hat, sundance."

"they call themselves the umbrella academy," reginald interrupted, "a group of scheming, perfidious malcontents who accosted me in the fall of '63 when i was away on business in dallas. be warned—they claim to be my spawn." all throughout reginald's little schpiel, five and the other kid maintained eye contact, five puzzled at his existence and him puzzled by five's puzzlement. he seemed to find it weird but, oddly enough, he didn't seem weirded out specifically. occasionally five would glance about the rest of the sparrows, gauge them if he could, and when that happened he would sometimes catch the barest glimpse of the kid looking at two of his sisters with confusion.

should i be worried? he was probably thinking to himself.

with five on his opposition? absolutely.

"claim? look, five, what the hell is going on?" allison sounded like she was moments away from boiling over.

"not sure yet, but it's concerning."

"is he telling the truth?" seeming to sense the steadily-rising tensions, the kid started, very slowly, to back away, retreating to the furthest reaches of the carpet before the battle had even begun.

"not the part about us being perfidious." vanya seemed to kind of placate that cowardice in him. maybe he even smiled at vanya.

"no! no, we're amateur-fidious, at best!"

"but we are his children, this is our house."

"yeah, we grew up here."

"yeah, yeah, we grew up here," alphonso mocked, getting a snicker from jayme, however the kid just shot them both a slightly judgmental look.

"i kind of think we would've noticed you," sloane said, to which luther stated his name and offered out his hand. sloane did not accept, really she didn't do a thing, and some whispers broke out amongst her and her little brother, whispers that five couldn't make out.

"okay. none of you belong here."

"oh! well, then. i guess we'll just pack our bags and move out."

christopher babbled and chittered, milking chuckles from his brothers and sisters. five had to say he looked way better smiling than frowning, though he figured it would probably be the same for anyone.

grace came in to the living room, heels click-click-clicking, holding a plate of cookies in her hand and apologizing that she couldn't do better. five couldn't catch the precise details. it was just kind of nice to see her again, even if she was certainly in need of a... few repairs.

"mom." diego's sentimental mumble caught some of the sparrows off-guard. the kid included.

"she's a robot, you perv."

"it's not a robot."

"don't call him that!"

"or what?" ben challenged.

"come closer and find out." bickering broke out between the two families, vanya and marcus actively trying to keep everyone's heads on straight, and five may have lost track of the conversation. until ben threw the first punch, anyway. he ducked back, watching as luther next was flung like a ragdoll across the room, landing on and breaking the poor couch. he saw the boy duck out and wanted to chase but first kept his loyalties, attacking ben and getting lost in a flurry of sharp punches and occasionally-failed dodges.

"you're alive. that's—great, or possibly horrible, i haven't decided yet."

"is that some weird kind of smack talk?"

"it's more of an existential problem, really, ben."

"awesome. well, here's your next problem." with his arms extending back and torso leaning forward, a grimy tentacle quickly burst from his chest, though not fast enough to stop five before he blinked away and onto the balcony.

"y'know, even though you're a total asshat now," five began, rudely cut off by another attack which he yet again evaded with ease. it was easier to land a punch and he watched as ben crashed into the ground. "it's nice to see you again. really." after seeing a particularly disturbing scene between diego and the cube, he stepped in to save allison from a few of the other sparrows, yet again finding himself on the second-floor balcony.

"thanks," allison managed through uneven breaths.

"no problem." both standing up, both dusting themselves off, they saw someone rounding the corner. it was him. still, that look of passive pacifism remained, now somewhat stoic in nature; he didn't want to fight, but he may need to. he was resigning himself to that fact and five could see it in his setting expression. and most importantly, there was also endless loyalty. oh, well.

five furrowed his brow, readjusting his jacket. "go help the others. i'll handle this one."

his new opponent almost seemed to space out, eyes narrowing just a bit as if being flooded by tons of new information. with grace and precision, and certainly speed, he set into a defensive stance. five blinked behind him to try for an attack and it was blocked. he continued to block, evade, block, evade, as fast as five tried to attack. the only sounds he made for a while were little grunts.

every failed punch and every successful block was adding to five's aggravation and his exasperation.

"y'know, five," he said, and hearing him speak for the first time startled five terribly, "delores wouldn't like you fighting like this! i'm not doing anything to you!" that shocked him so bad he misfired a punch but it landed for the first time because of how he went to dodge. he was weaker than five first surmised, falling onto the ground, and five continued to strike him back down until he was pinned and unable to move. he looked enraged, face twisted, eyes wide, teeth bared and gritted, glaring daggers at the kid, who looked to be in quite a bit of pain.

"how do you know my name?!" he barked. "how do you know her name?!" five got no answer and that was endlessly more irritating. the kid slammed his hand onto the ground and grabbed the first thing he could, a small piece of rubble, but five watched as, in those few fractions of seconds, that small piece of debris turned into a metal candlestick.

a metal candlestick.

the moment five saw that, he teleported, reappearing just a few feet away. he pushed off his total confusion; no time. the kid kept the candlestick in his hand when he fumbled to stand, not getting even a moment before five tackled him into a headlock. he didn't think twice about the look of pain on the kid's face because that wasn't exactly imperative and he didn't hesitate at the sounds he made.

the kid raised the candlestick again and five watched in subtle horror as it flitted between many different forms, each punctuated by a small sound and a bit of light. he only recognized a few of those hundred forms before he saw it land, like a wheel of fortune, on a knife and he plunged it down. five jerked out of the way of the blade. even though he had once been so hesitant to fight, so afraid of hurting other people, he seemed finally able to push that away and actually defend himself. he may not have been particularly strong, but he was swift and flexible while wrenching himself out of five's grip and adept at landing hits that would still make five flinch and pause. the kid blocked a punch and the moment that they came in contact with each other, the world around them... changed.

from the slightly destroyed upper floor of the academy house, it became an office building, papers flying about while people panicked about the violent fight between the aisles of cubicles. in that moment of confusion, he landed a hit on five, right in the gut. after a pained second, eyes squeezed tight, he grit his teeth and kept fighting.

the office building had become a high-rise skyscraper that they were fighting on the edge of.

another punch and they were on the deck of a cruise ship.

another block and they were in a spanning parking garage. the kid advanced and forced five to back up, closer to the edge of the space, and certainly to a painful fall. he continued to evade every attempted hit, no matter how five had calculated them, before pouncing on him and shoving him right out of the concrete monolith, plummeting down toward the ground along with him.

"how the hell are you doing this?!" five shouted, voice swallowed up by the shouting winds. he grabbed his shirt, bunching up his collar tight enough to cut off his breathing. the panic in his eyes welled up very quick.

and then they were back. instead of hitting the hard pavement ground, five lost all the air in his lungs when he thudded onto the carpeted academy floor, gasping for a second as the kid scrambled away from him, coughing and wheezing.

five hadn't even strangled him for that long, what the hell?

five forced himself to sit, to stand, shooting the glare to end all glares at the boy across from him—however he didn't attack yet. after all the disorientation he felt from those few... transitions, he wanted to keel over and vomit. he was in no condition to fight. luckily, however, neither was his opponent.

killing the kid would not get five his answers, no matter how badly he wanted to do it.

the kid was on the ground, propping himself up on one of his hands, his entire body seeming wracked by pained, nauseated tremors. he looked to be heaving, expression conflicted, exhausted beyond exhausted. he held his head the way one would when suffering from a bad headache.

his question went unanswered, which just served to annoy five further. "are you a time traveler or something? no. a multiversal traveler? do you work with the commission? that's the only possibility i can think of." knowing about delores, knowing about his name, certainly knowing his past, instantly transporting both of them to different places, it could all connect to multiversal travel.

but that spacing out part, before he could dodge like some highly trained professional, and that debris-to-candlestick-to-knife part? those still kind of puzzled him.

the kid wrinkled his nose. "that's the only possibility? you've got a narrow range." for someone who sounded so pained and exhausted, he could manage some mouthiness. somehow he sounded more genuine than sarcastic, though. strange. what about him wasn't?

five's eye twitched and his lips pressed hard into a scowl. "a narrow range? a narrow range? my 'range' isn't narrow! i've seen so many possibilities unfold! do you even know what i had to do to get here?" his words hissed with pure venom. that didn't faze his opponent, even whilst he jabbed an accusatory finger at him, as though somehow this was his fault.

"i do, actually," he managed, although still short of breath. "you got trapped in the apocalypse for a few decades, offered a deal from the commission, broke your contract with them and became a fugitive, got back to your family, and have been trying to evade apocalypses ever since. third time's the charm, right, five?" he recounted it all with the cadence and sensitivity of a history teacher summarizing an important, yet complicated, period of time.

"how could you possibly know—stop calling me that! how are you able to do any of this!"

"i'm not gonna stop calling you by your name." he laughed through his words. he laughed.

"is my exasperation funny to you?"

"i-i mean, kinda! do you know how many ways i've seen this conversation going?" five stilled like a statue. "this was the most common outcome. well, uhm, aside from you just killing me. it's just a little funny how you always react the same way." he shrugged a bit, as though this was simply some high school gossip, and not (one of) the most puzzling thing that five had ever been exposed to.

"look," five began, trying to steady himself. "if you don't tell me how you know about me—how you know about delores—this will become a timeline where i kill you. okay? capiche?"

he raised his hands in surrender. they shook. "capiche, five."

"stop. calling me that."

"to even the playing field, i'm [y/n]. there." he sat forward, resting his elbows on his knees, checking his hands. yet again he seemed to space out, just for a moment this time, before going through a grounding technique. he looked determined now, not as tired as before, though it did remain rather clearly in his eyes. [y/n] was just a kid again. he looked like a pathetic, sick kitten. "it's my power. i was born like this. you travel through space and time, i travel through reality. all of reality. alternate universes, as you know them. close by, far away, ones almost exactly the same and some with very distinctive evolutionary branches. the further away the world, the... stranger they get. i can see literally any possibility. so i—i fucking know you, five. i know you. i know your brothers and your sister and your in-laws and your niece and every other niece or nephew you could've had. there are so, so many worlds where i was an umbrella, or your friend, or stuck with you in the apocalypse, or... something like that. that's how i know you, and know delores. i was there."

sister, singular?

fuck, why was that his first take-away?

five narrowed his eyes slightly. "you can see every alternate universe," he said, slowly, as if clarifying something to [y/n] when he really needed the clarification for himself.

he nodded. "use them, too."

"use...?"

[y/n] broke into a little smile. his answer remained unknown because their restrained conversation was interrupted by one of [y/n]'s sisters. just one glance and his smile disappeared, staring at five with now-widened eyes, mouthing something along the lines of 'get the fuck out.'

five didn't need to be told twice. a flit of light and he had disappeared to who-the-hell-knows-where.

"who the hell was that creep," jayme mumbled, watching as [y/n] stumbled to his feet and dusted himself off. she grabbed him by the scruff of his jacket out of instinct to make sure he didn't fall over.

"uh... someone pretty interesting," [y/n] said, staring at where he'd once been, the flash of bright light still burned into his eyes. he wanted to find him. maybe needed to find him. probably because something in the world was very wrong, even if no other timeline had figured it out yet.

if any of the umbrellas knew where to hide out, it would probably be klaus, right? simple solution. kind of. as long as he could sneak out undetected by his siblings.

a good bit of time had passed when you finally had the chance to scope out the hotel obsidian. you had changed into something more casual and lowkey, sunglasses now balanced atop your nose and a nice light scarf about your neck. music played over your headphones and you wandered inside of the place, stricken with the sight of heavy art deco. it was rather nice, actually, when you took the time to appreciate it. then again, your mind was rather preoccupied with what was probably a very big deal. on the other side of the lobby, in the little bar and lounge area, you could spot a few of the hargreeves siblings. most notably five, now wearing a white bathrobe. soon his eyes glanced to you and you could feel his gaze sharpen. he looked back at his brothers and excused himself, stepping off the stool and teleporting to you before his feet hit the ground.

"what are you doing here," he hissed through gritted teeth.

"i mean, our conversation got cut off earlier. seemed right to continue it, y'know?"

five looked back at his brothers and then at you once more. klaus was staring after him but you didn't know if he recognized you; luther and diego were still totally enraptured in their chinese food.

the look on five's face told you a whole lot; it was critical to him to talk with you, figure things out, because he guessed—and guessed right—that you weren't just here to politely finish a conversation. something weird was going on, whether he wanted to know or not. "alright. okay. fine. just," he grasped your shoulder after a second and then you were both gone, reappearing instantaneously in a room you assumed to be five's. small cot in the corner, bunk bed opposite, and a couch.

god, you wanted to throw up. you clutched your stomach, squeezing your eyes shut for a minute.

he crossed his arms and looked at you. "so where exactly did we leave off?"

you paused to scrub your mind, trying to recall. a few blinks broke the few seconds of spacing out. usually you weren't this forgetful, but, uh, today was an interesting one. "i said i can use those universes and that confused you. and then jayme came around and i told you to leave."

"right," five muttered. "what exactly did you mean by that?"

"well, obviously i can use them for information." your voice was somewhat soft, actually, which was mighty strange to him.

"hmph. how could i forget." five's flat voice was thick with sarcasm.

you managed a smile. "but i can also use them for skills and stuff. the dodging, earlier; i can't really do that here. there's a world where i star in fighting movies and stuff, where i'm good at dodging and i'm fast and flexible, and i can... link my mind, i guess, and use those skills. and the... the candlestick. knife. thing. i can change things to whatever another me is holding. i can change my clothes. i can change reality."

"so, in essence, your mind is able to find every other instance of you across time and space and access them? and... communicate with them, i suppose, in some way or another."

you shrugged a bit. "about explains it. but the—... can i ask you something?" you suddenly sounded sheepish, hesitant, like you were constantly rethinking what you were about to say. five furrowed his brow, a little surprised to see that look on your face, and he really didn't like it.

"depends on what that something is," he responded, speaking cautiously.

you found yourself spacing out again, but this time not to access some alternate plane of existence. every other universe had its own noise, and every other universe was persistently audible; that loud buzz was starting to give you yet another headache. it was probably possible to overdose on tylenol, right? suddenly that constant look of exhaustion on your face was even more obvious to five. for a moment, he seemed almost sympathetic to that. he could certainly understand it, at the very least. "you've got about twenty-eight years of experience on me," you began, forcing your voice to be steady. "do you have any clue how to deal with the, uhm, existential part of it all?" lightheartedness seemed to be a skill of yours. five could respect it.

you doubted, sincerely doubted, that there could be anything in the world to help you from the persistent noise. or from the pain and exhaustion of swatting from world to world to world in the span of thirty seconds during a fight. it was a wonder you were still walking.

"why should i help you with that, exactly? your family tried to kill mine."

"i didn't try to kill anyone. i hid upstairs the entire time. well, uh, almost the entire time. i can be an ally to you guys. i'd... prefer to be allied with you guys." if anyone else in the world knew about the ins and outs of the umbrella academy, five had no doubt in his mind that it would be you and your presumably-torturous ability. it would probably be a smart idea on their side as well, to ally with you.

"before i agree to help you at all, how can i be sure your family isn't using you as some sort of... puppet? some sort of inside man?"

you shrugged a bit after a second. "i wouldn't be a very good choice."

"seriously? do you think i'm stupid or something?"

you crossed your arms, looking at him with narrowed eyes. "no. i know you aren't stupid. and i'm pretty sure that your first choice wouldn't be a 'weak thirteen-year-old kid with a power that cripples him with headaches and exhaustion whenever he uses it,' either. not to mention that said kid can't hear what's going on sometimes because of literally every other sound in the expansive multiverse." the words were sarcastic but the tone was very genuine, almost excruciatingly so.

"i have... so many more questions now."

you shrugged a bit. "i can answer some of them, i guess." considering that you knew almost all the ins and outs of his life, it seemed only fair to share some of yours. you were too tired to steer the conversation back to why you had came. perhaps you'd already forgotten it.

"why exactly are you thirteen? you were born in 1989, you had to be."

"... i chose to stay this age."

"how can you just choose to stay that age?" exasperation met with confusion in a very strange voice of five's. even after all he'd gone through and learned, you were just springing question marks all over the place. god damnit.

"i can manipulate almost every aspect of reality, five," you said, softly, in response. "it's not out of the realm of possibility to stay thirteen. not for me."

five nodded slightly after a second. that nod steadily turned into a shake of his head. "jesus—i should've grabbed some coffee." he pinched the bridge of his nose, shaking his head. "just give me a second."

"oh. uh, no need." glancing about the room, there was a small corner table, atop it an ice bucket and some plastic cups for water. he watched, for some reason a bit puzzled, as you placed your hands on it. spaced out. and it flitted to a fresh coffee pot and a mug. they seemed like something from a diner.

well, that would make sense, wouldn't it?

you poured him a cup and handed it, still steaming, over to him.

five scowled a bit, staring down at the filled mug, before his sharp gaze landed on you again.

"it's just coffee, five. it's not poisoned or anything. here." you plucked it back out of his grasp and took a sip, waited a few seconds, and handed it back. "see? you're fine."

after a second, he nodded. "right." he didn't find himself bothered by drinking from the same mug you had. he'd done a lot worse things, hadn't he?

"so... what were those other questions?"

after taking a few healthy swigs, he cleared his throat. "your ability—it really taxes you? even after all these years?" five would never admit it, but the coffee was pretty goddamn good. whatever diner your alternate-self worked in was worth a visit, if it existed in this world. "is that why you were shaking and panting so much earlier?"

you felt a bit embarrassed. "yeah," you mumbled. "i trained with it a lot, but, i wasn't very strong to begin with." you sat down carefully on the sofa, pulling a bottle of painkillers from your coat pocket.

"when's the last time you had a dose?" five asked, mug to his lips, shooting you a side-eye.

"... maybe three hours ago. why?"

he clicked his tongue and shook his head, plucking the bottle out of your hands. "not now, then."

"dude! what the hell! i-i need those!"

"well, i can't keep asking questions to someone sick from taking too much tylenol. and you can wait three hours."

you groaned but didn't complain, just settling back against the comfortable cushions. "fine. i'll wait." and you mumbled 'you're just like sloane' under your breath.

"good," he mumbled, sitting down beside you after tossing the pills onto his bed. "you said you could hear every sound in the multiverse. something tells me that isn't a hyperbole."

you nodded a bit and slouched down, trying to figure out a decent analogy. "when you remove a door from its threshold, you can always hear what's on the other side, unless you actively tune it out. just, for me, there were never doors. it was always like this. every single feasible universe is out there, fighting for my attention, almost every waking moment." you recounted with a deep sort of mourning. five couldn't blame you, he supposed. you had been robbed of silence, of pure solitude, of privacy. his heart almost ached for you.

had you been born with the doors off their frames? he wanted to ask, he really wanted to ask, but it was probably going to be way too... private of a thing. personal. from what he could tell.

"and i thought wrangling that crowd of toddlers was bad. i can't imagine hearing everything they do, everywhere, constantly," he mused.

you cracked a smile. it had been a while since you were able to joke around with someone, even if that someone had interrogated you like a police investigator. "oh, it's the worst," you giggled, and he laughed along. "i mean, it's bad enough knowing what your brothers do into their socks, it's even worse to walk in on them over, like, over two thousand times."

"i've known you for a very short period of time, but something tells me that's the worst thing you've ever said."

for someone in a very persistent and terrible bout of pain, your laugh, and your smile, were incredibly bright. five couldn't really say that he was expecting this when first appearing in the umbre—ahem. in the sparrow academy building, but he wasn't exactly complaining. this could be nice. he really hoped it would be, anyway.

silence fell on you two for a while. the overbearing static was starting to edge back in now that you had nothing more to say. the pain was ebbing.

"... something's wrong." you sounded deadly serious, it was horrifying.

"s—sorry?" five felt like he had whiplash after such an extreme diversion from the topic.

you seemed to be fighting that urge to space out a whole lot more. this was important, you needed to stay on track, and yet your stress was doing exactly the opposite of tunnel vision. shit.

five noticed; and he kind of needed you to talk, as fast as possible, so reached out and pinched your neck, successfully getting you to tense and wake up, in some sense of the words. offense was replaced with gratitude in your eyes. "i don't know exactly what. no other universe has figured it out. but you aren't supposed to be here, this isn't your timeline, that's—a very big problem. it could potentially 'rip a hole in space and time.'" five muttered along with you, cussing and hanging his head.

"why didn't you say this first?" he hissed.

"i'm sorry!" you sounded very genuine and he felt rather bad. "i-i—the interrogation and then the pain and then the... getting along with you, i forgot." it was another world, some utterance of 'not normal yet' that brought the thought back to you.

your voice was cracking. you felt far worse than five could ever make you feel.

"... it's fine. it's fine."

"it very much isn't. you know that."

five knew it all too well. he groaned, pinched the bridge of his nose, and downed the rest of his coffee. "fantastic."

"i mean, it may be a problem we can solve." you shot him a smile, a tired and weak little thing, but it did comfort him a bit.

"the universe will really mind if seven dumbasses stick around?" his humor had soured, but it was still there. you felt very guilty, unable to look him in his eyes, shoulders slouched as if defeated in some great thing.

"she's a stickler for rules."

"hmph." he scowled a full-face scowl. "no retirement yet, i guess."

out of all the things you could ever have seen, heard, felt, and known, one thing seemed... important. emotionally, anyway. "if it's, uhm, any consolation... retirement did look good on you, by the way."

he couldn't help but smile a bit. somewhere out there was a world where you and five were friends well into his retirement, be that at his confusing age or his chronological age from 1989, where he was happily retired with no time-threatening anomalous issues to draw him out. even if he was bound to die in this timeline, there was some comfort in knowing many other timelines saw him content. "i'll take your word for it."