#first year gang my beloved

[theheightofdishonor]

[sodaspoppers]

Woah!! Redraw upon ye

This is and always has been a Yuki Juza friendship household

[igotanidea]

Dirty work: Jason Todd x reader

A/N: I am a firm believer that even in his post-patrol haze and surge of energy all Jason Todd needs from his beloved princess are hugs, not fucks and i will die on this hill.

***

The adrenaline was still fuzzing in his system, even after hours and hours of his night job in Gotham. It was stressful and hitting on all his sensitive spots hidden so deep under the surface. Muscles moving in the trained motion he practised milion times before, each instinct spurred on by imagination running wild.

Hurt, scared, innocent kids, left to tend to themselves on the streets.

Ordinary citizens exposed to the aftermath of whatever drama and destruction the mobs and gangs decided to wage that night.

Terror on the street on women who were working the night shift, trying to make a living, make ends meet.

And the same shit going on over and over again every fucking night, because fucking someone had a fucking moral code. Because fucking someone refused to put an end to something terrible, too afraid to stain his fucking soul.

Red Hood didn't have a soul to save anymore.

Not after everything that happened in his life.

Dirty wokrk, but someone had to do it.

One life taken, dozens of other's saved. Felt like constantly being at war and the heat of the fight made it so much easier to forget about the sacrifices made along the way.

Red Hood was strong, tough and ready to take on the hardest responsiblity of cleaning Gotham of scumbags and crimnals.

But after?

Once the first rays of a morning sun loomed on the horizon, Jason knew it was time to go home. Take off the mask. Became an ordinary man once more.

Hoping, wishing and praying she wouldn't kick him out again this time. That she would take him, despite the blood on his hands, the injuries on his body and deep scars on his soul.

Not a Red Hood anymore.

Jason Todd. Human. Man. Boyfiend.

The energy was still high when he climbed to the apartment and stood on the wooden floor, carefullly avoiding that one screetching floarboard, almost stepping on his toes to not wake her.

"Jason."

Years of vigilantism and dealing with shit.

Hightened instincts and senses.

And yet, Y'N's voice in the morning, in the empty, quiet apartment made him jump from surprise, causing her to giggle, causing the surprise to give way to a wave of warm feelings.

"Morning, sunshine."

"Depends. Did you bring me breakfast?" she teased

"Since when do you eat breakfast?"

"It doesn't matter if I do!" she got out of the bed, yawning widely, rubbing her eyes and stepping closer to him, taking his helmet off, mindful of the explosived installed there (biting her tongue to not say something about using a protection that was simultaniously life threatening) "You are supposed to preach me about not eating healthy and feeding me with the best groceries. Croissaints, fancy salads, low fat cheese. All that stuff!"

"Are you for real?" he frowned in confusion upon her words. What was going on here?

"Nah, I'm joking cause I can tell that under all this pose you're tired. Though maybe a bit of laugh would do you good. Even if it;s at my expense" she smiled cupping his cheek and meeting his eyes "What do you need? hugs, kisses, cuddles? Or somehing more intense?" that was an obvious hint she was willing to help if he needed some action to blow off some steam.

"Can you just be with me? I just need your presence next to me. Knowing this is all real and I won't wake up alone again." hearing those words coming from Jason was the biggest leap of faith. He was not the one to admit to feeling tired or that something was weighting on his conscience once out of the mask. Never in the million years. But with her - it was simpler, easier, knowing she would just listen and observe rather than fill the silence with silly questions and talking and preaching and lamenting about his behaviour.

"I'm here. I promise, it's all real. You're not alone." She nodded calmly.

Jason produced the tiniest smile and let her guide him to the warm bed with the soft sheets smelling like her, with her arms wrapped around him like a soft cocoon.

And it was just fine.

No need to talk or to explain or to fight anymore.

Getting rid of this feeling that nothing made sense, his efforts were futile and no one would ever understand him.

Finally, a little bit of peace and maybe - just maybe - the tiniest amount of happiness brought by the steady beating of her heart in his ear and the gentle movement of her fingers in his hair.

True meaning of intimacy between two people.

Bonding for life.

[celestemona]

WHERE YOU’RE HIS BELOVED S/O

but you don’t respect the law

pairing: neuvillette x fem former gang leader! reader

reblogs and comments are appreciated ♡

when you first started dating Neuvillette, the looks you both got on the street were pure admiration and a touch of envy. after all, it was no wonder why when the two of you exuded an unshakable elegance and the stares you exchanged with each other drew long sighs from even the most unromantic person.

wherever you went together people would whisper in delight, gossiping about your last date and pointing out on how you filled in what the other lacked. from your charming, mysterious personality to Neuvillette's seriousness and honesty, you and him were considered the most famous, beautiful and powerful couple in Fontaine — the definition of perfect for each other.

but many still wondered how the Chief Justice got his heart stole after spending the last few years rejecting any potential partners, because even the most senior citizens of the capital remember only seeing the iudex accompanied only by the eccentric hydro archon, to whom he served more as a responsible guardian than a right hand.

the truth was that for nearly a decade you had been in Neuvillette's crosshairs. or rather, in the crosshairs of the law.

what the hydro nation’s population didn’t imagine was that behind your sweet smiles and kind words was hiding an ambitious, astute woman and former head of one of the most famous illegal organizations in Fontaine with connections throughout Teyvat. and for years you managed to manage and expand your business without the goddess herself being suspicious of all the illegal activities that went on under her nose.

at that time, you didn't know which of the fontanian authorities to watch out for and so you loosened the reins. unfortunately or not, that was your downfall so you couldn't hide from the Chief Justice for very long — in fact, you actually did.

the only relationship that Neuvillette had for all the decades (centuries) he was alive was with his responsibility, therefore, it wasn’t difficult for you to use the art of persuasion and seduction to get rid of the main objectives of the man who was to take you to court and condemn you for your crimes.

for months you've been successful in your escapes, using your wiles, wits and contacts to hide any evidence that could land you in trial.

however, it wasn't until you ended up stumbling into your own trap that you found yourself willingly surrendering to the dragon-man.

it was only when you partially abandoned the illegal business that you then started dating, though. Neuvillette might love you irrevocably but he wouldn't date someone who was involved in fraud or smuggling — besides, you too were tired of your old life and so left your leader's chair to your most faithful and trusted friend.

although you now had a good business as a florist in the hydro capital, you still pulled strings to smuggle some rare flowers from Sumeru or seeds only found in the heart of Natlan to your shop. Neuvillette would usually stare at you in disapproval, but then forget to give you a lecture for the way you managed to distract him with kisses and sweet talk.

“last time this month, my love. i promise."

“ma chérie, you said that last week.”

“i know i know! but do you know Colette? that kind lady who always offers us the freshest macarons from her thursday batches? she loved the popularity of Kalpalatas in her bakery and made me an order of sixty of them, can you believe that? Kalpalatas are not easy to find, mon amour. no no.”

Neuvillette could only sigh in weariness, the silver engagement ring on his right ring finger glinting as he pinched the bridge of his nose.

“make sure the goods arrive before dawn on tuesday.”

smiling mischievously you declared “i love you.”

even if this new life was quite different from your original character, no one could dispute how it fit you so well. even your former subordinates had only positive comments to make about how the domestic routine suited you. and you really wouldn't change a thing about it because you were never as happy as you were with the man who lay down beside you every night, and dawned with his arms tightly around you.

if anything, you wouldn't change anything in your life because that way you would never meet Neuvillette.

even if there was still so much difference between the two of you, there couldn't be a better relationship of companionship and understanding than that.

that must be the reason why that instead of running away again, you preferred to be caught.

[cheonstapes]

😝 omg I absolutely loved the way u wrote spider barbie!!! Thanks again so much!! 💕✨

If it’s not too much of a bother, I would like to send in another request lol. 😅 (unless there’s a limit on how many requests can be sent, I completely understand 😊)

I would like to request Miguel O’Haraxfem!Jessica rabbit inspired reader. She’s the most beautiful & generous spider woman across the multiverse, which makes sense since she’s also the most desired among the spiders. Maybe one day she’s hanging out w/ her friends (Miles, Gwen, Hobie, Pavitr, & Peter) at the spider society cafeteria when everyone in the group could be discussing their Valentine’s Day plans. Until they decide to ask her if she has a date or any upcoming plans (The spider gang not knowing she’s already married to Miguel 😂) When asked she just zones out and has flashbacks about all the multiple dates her and miguel went on throughout the multiverse, including the spicy times they shared together~ 😉

When asked again, she lets them know tht she’s already in an established relationship w/ Miguel; which makes the spider gang’s jaws drop bcuz even though miguel is a good looking guy they can’t understand how a ray of sunshine like her ended up with someone as serious and angry like Miguel 😂

The spider gang could ask: “What do u see in tht guy?!?!” 😱 Spider-reader: “He makes me laugh..😏”

Thanks again! 😊🙏🏻

miguel o'hara stars in... 'WAIT...YOU'RE ROGER RABBIT?' (°ロ°) !

a/n ~ i absolutely love jessica rabbit, girlboss, she's so hot. TYSM for this request my love!!!! there's never a limit ( ` ω ´ ) send as many as you want bby 💗 i went a little overboard but this was so fun to write!! ALSO ITS MIGUELS BIRTHDAY!!

summary; it's valentine's day at hq, and everyone can't help but wonder why you're still single.

pairing; miguel o'hara x reader

wc; 2.3k+

cw; FLUFF!! SMUT!!, secret relationship, pining, no one can believe you n miguel are together, loss of virginity, m!masturbation, pillow fuckin, fleshlights, miguel fucks an ai you, first time, established relationship, reader is very popular, day dreaming abt miguel (real), they're just in love, nawt proofread - crying over this

valentine’s day at hq was always fun - for you least.

every year since you joined the spider society it seemed like the gifts would multiply - what stared out as some cute cards and a couple boxes of chocolate eventually turned into bouquets of roses, teddies, gifts, and even declaration’s of love. it was all flattering, honestly. to know that so many people admired you was a great feeling, even if you can’t reciprocate - it’s the sentiment that counts. but unfortunately you were already spoken for - by none other than your own boss, your fiancé, miguel. 

having started with such a beloved reputation was one of the main reasons your husband-to-be actually avoided you at first. it was like you had your own personal fan club - spiders’ following you around where you go, people offering to by you lunch, begging miguel to put you on a mission with them, showering you with compliments. you were really irritating to him, another distraction he didn’t have the time to deal with - not that he wanted to anyway. well, that was until he did. 

gradually, he started to notice how your eyes would light up when you’d see something you like, how you’d wear that one perfume thats scent would linger a bit too long in the air, ages after you’ve already sped off down the hallway. he warmed up to you eventually, leading to you two spending a lot more time together. little dates in the different universes, him picking up a little souvenir for you on missions and you doing the same - eventually leading to you two moving in together, and then him proposing. keeping you two’s relationship a secret was a decision that you both had to make, considering how popular you were and that miguel’s your boss. so every valentine’s day, you both celebrate together privately in miguel’s nueva york condo - exchanging gifts and kisses, drinking till you fall asleep in each other’s arms. this year, however, was a little different. 

hiding a relationship isn’t the easiest thing in the word, especially at a time like this - when all you want to do is pounce on your fiancé every time you see him ’n kiss him till you’re both breathless. it was getting tiring. it’s the day of love and you can’t do the one thing the day is about, love someone. you’d both send lingering glances at each other throughout the day, sneaky touches when no one’s looking, maybe even a few quick make out sesh’s in miguel’s office. you both knew you wouldn’t make it through the rest of the day, eventually separating as you sat in the canteen with some of your spider-friends - ones miguel wasn’t very keen on eating lunch with, leading to him retreating back to his office alone. 

the table was buzzing as everyone mentioned their plans for the day - miles taking gwen to his universe on a little day out that he swears isn’t a date, pav and gayatri going to her new movie, peter and mj having someone babysit mayday so they can go on a long-overdue date, and hobie - well, he doesn’t believe in valentine’s, i guess. you so badly wanted to join in, silently chewing on your ’spider-man 2099’ themed burger. your fiancé was basically everywhere, how can you not miss him - even if he’s just a couple minutes walk from you. it was bittersweet, to say the least, to listen to your friends so passionately- 

“hey, y/n, any plans this year? please tell me you’re finally dating someone.” the sudden voice made you jump, eyes widening as you look at the culprit, a sly smile on her face. “uhhh, n-no not really.” that was a lie. the whole table groaned their complaints, all still in disbelief that you’re still not seeing anyone. “you serious? love, look at you - and look at them.” hobie gestures to the crowd forming behind the table, all of them holding some sort of gift for you - some more…extravagant than the rest. “there’s no way that you can’t find someone, babe.” i mean, technically, he was right - you could practically get anyone you wanted. but, you already got what you want, and that’s miguel. 

he’s your everything. despite the turbulent start you both had, it was all worth it in the end. miguel loves like you’re his last - which you are, and his first too - in all aspects. hearing your boss was a virgin was even more shocking then him admitting his feelings for you - cause, like, how? you tried so hard not to laugh, he couldn’t be serious. it turns out he was very, very, very serious. you felt so bad, running up to him and holding him tightly - reassuring him that is was ok, that there was nothing wrong with being a virgin no matter his age. you took it slow for the first few months, nothing more than heated kisses and a bit of groping but it never went further than that. to be honest, you were scared. miguel was nothing short of impatient to feel you, to finally sink his cock into you after centuries of you denying him of that. you knew, of course, how desperate he was - but it was a big deal to you. the thing was, you were a virgin too. it was too sudden to mention so you went with keeping it a secret, but damn was it getting harder to not give in. the thought of him leaving after fucking you was at the forefront of your mind, you obviously knew he wouldn’t - but men are still men, right?

when he did find out, it went a hell of a lot better than you expected it to. both of you deciding to take your time learning each other’s bodies, exploring new likes and dislikes, discovering new kinks, and overall - strengthening the love you both hold for each other. your first time was magical. it was exactly three years ago now, on valentines day, sprawled out on miguel’s plush, king sized bed.

“f-fhhuck, feels so good, baby. are…are you doing ok, sweetheart?”

he was so attentive, making sure you felt as comfortable as possible, constantly asking if you’re feeling alright. it couldn’t have been more perfect. miguel’s large frame engulfed you as you sat in his. lap, his body pressed against the headboard. holding you close, he guided your hips slowly against his slick cock, the stretch momentarily caused a sharp pain to run through your body - miguel soothing you with sweet, wet kisses down the side of your sweaty neck. his large hands roamed your body, gripping your hips, waist, gently kneading your ass. the room felt hot, sweat mixing together as your hips move in tandem with his own - it was a prime example of love making. breathless kisses were shared, lips slotting together sloppily as you rode him eagerly - you were such a sight on top of him, a goddess sent just for him. “mig- baby, you’re so- shit, you’re so perfect.” no, you were perfect. soft skin pressing against his solid body, tits rubbing on his - slick running down his length. your moans were like a chorus of angels singing down to him, his heart almost pounding out of his chest from the love he feels for you. 

sharing a moment like this together was a turning point in your relationship. giving each other your virginities, connecting in a way you will never experience with anyone else - you were made for each other. his hips sped up, slamming into your sore cunt as he wrapped his arms around your waist. digging his feet into the soft sheets and pulling your hot body into his, lips latching onto your jaw. you still couldn’t believe he was a virgin before he met you. the way he moved, the way his tip would hit that one spot deep by your cervix, the way his thick fingers would caress your aching nipples - he had to have had some sort of experience. but the truth was, miguel had little to no sex drive. not feeling compelled at all to even rub one off, he was too busy after all - trying to keep the multiverse in tact. that all changed when he met you. suddenly, in his 30 years of living, did he have his first wet dream - and it was about you. 

he felt like a teenager again, learning things for the first time. watching porn for the first time was something, spending hours looking for a woman who looks somewhat like you - much to the interest and concern of LYLA. this was very serious to him, knowing that he would eventually fuck you - he would spend all his free time learning how to please you properly. tutorials, articles, and just plain amateur porn were his best friends. he would practice with his pillow, even buying a fleshlight to stick between it to just make it a little bit more realistic. at one point, he felt like he completely lost it. spending months learning how to fuck you wasn’t making him feel any better, he didn’t feel like he really knew how to please you. so what did he do? he made a holographic version of you, of course!

programming it to be exactly like you, using your measurements from when he made your suit to get your body as accurate as possible. it wasn’t really you, but it was good enough. he still had to work out the kinks but he was getting there. he ditched the porn completely, using ai you to progress instead. fucking an ai isn’t as easy as you think, but it was enough to help him figure out what positions he wants you in, even what ones you’d like statistically. miguel never did end up telling you about it, keeping ai you locked away in a secret folder. he was no stranger in letting you know how obsessed he was with you, but this was just embarrassing to him - and knowing you, he would never live this down. but don’t worry, LYLA’s always here to remind him time and time again. 

miguel was never the same after he lost his virginity to you - he became insatiable. it was like a switch flipped in his brain and suddenly he was always horny for you, quickies in his office becoming daily occurrences. speaking of quickies, you could feel his cum from earlier pooling in your panties right now- 

“yn? YN! is she- is she ok?” oh…you were at lunch still. everyone at the table was staring at. you with raised brows, silently intimidating you into spilling what you were so engrossed in to the point where you missed the whole conversation. you obviously weren’t about to tell them you were just thinking of their boss fucking you into next week, like come on - think about the kids, guys. “i…i, uh- it was nothing really. sorry about that, just zoned out for a sec.” it was something, someone as a matter of fact. you might as well tell them, what’s the harm in it? you’re only gonna get absolutely bombarded by everyone and anyone in hq but that’s the least of your worries. the table had seemingly moved on, chatting about their plans again before you jumped in - “actually, i do have plans.” that certainly got their attention. all eyes were on you, even the crowd still lingering behind perked up at your comment, leaning closer to hear what you had to say. 

“me ’n miguel were just gonna stay ho-“ 

“MIGUEL?!”

gasps. that’s all you could hear. everyones jaws were dropped, blinking their eyes at you like a bunch of frogs. “what? am i not allowed to spend time with my fiancé-“

“FIANCÈ?!”

it’s like every time you spoke it got worse, the table erupting in shouts of disbelief - it was getting difficult to speak over them, the constant questions being thrown at you were overwhelming to say the least. you weren’t obligated to explain yourself, love is love - even if it’s between someone as lovely and sweet as you, and someone as moody and feral as miguel. you guys made it work and that’s all that matters! someone else had something to say on the matter though, the commotion prompting miguel to emerge out of his cave and head straight to you.

“as i was saying, he’s my fiancé, we always spend valentines together. miguel is a great guy. yeah, he’s an asshole - but you just gotta get to know him.” you’re not wrong, miguel certainly seems to agree. the table went silent, staring up at his figure looming over you. “i don’t appreciate you guys harassing my wife. now, if you have no further questions - we have plans tonight, that don’t involve people prying into our privacy.” you spun around in your seat, looking up at him sheepishly. his eyes seemed to warm up at bit, a large hand reaching out to you - one that you immediately take. he held you close to him, interlocking your fingers tightly as he addressed the table. “and…our wedding is next year. you’re all only invited ‘cause she wanted you guys there. do not disappoint her.” with that, he turns on his heels, dragging you along with him - he didn’t want to deal with them anymore, not when he had the rest of the day to spend loving you instead. 

“baby, y’sure you’re ok with everyone knowing about…us?” that was a stupid question. of course he was, you’re his - and he’s yours. “you’re about to be my wife cariño, todo el mundo necesita saber que estás fuera de los límites - ‘specially that fuckin’ fan club of yours.” he was such a big baby, pouting like that. “oh my god! you’re jealous of a bunch of kids who have a little crush on me, babe. ‘sides, i think it’s quite cute - i got so much chocolate this year-“

“throw them away, i’m getting you all that and more.”

-cariño, todo el mundo necesita saber que estás fuera de los límites - sweetheart, everyone needs to know you're off limits

-the miguel figure on my dresser says hi!

[corroded-hellfire]

Something Sweet - Eddie Munson x Reader

A collab with my beloved @munson-blurbs

An As You Wish story

Summary: When the Munson boys that you babysit ask you to join them for trick-or-treating, how can you say no? Especially when you have a massive crush on their father.

Note: Happy Halloween! Please enjoy the first time that reader gets to spend the holiday with the crazy Munson gang 🧡

Warnings: older!eddie, dad!eddie, babysitter!reader, male masturbation

Words: 4k

[As You Wish masterlist]

It’s the week before Halloween, and while the weather has cooled and fall decor is in abundance, the Munson boys are still trying to determine their costumes. 

“I can’t deciiiide,” Ryan whines to you, flopping back onto the couch with a dramatic groan. 

You take a seat next to him, scrunching up your nose in thought. “What’re we down to?” you ask. 

“Vampire or Scooby-Doo.”

You consider both options, trying to drown out the sound of the Hey, Arnold episode Luke’s engrossed in. “Hmm…my vote is for vampire.” You laugh when his face pinches in a frown. “That right there tells me you wanna be Scooby-Doo. I knew I could help,” you teasingly add. 

“Hey!” Luke calls out, startling you briefly.  

“Hey is for horses.” You grin. “What’s up?”

“Can—”

The front door opens with a soft groan, and Eddie steps inside. He shrugs out of his leather jacket and hangs it on a hook near the door. 

“Daddy!” Luke calls, pushing himself off the ground and running full speed at his father.

Eddie catches him easily and tosses the small boy over his shoulder as he walks further into the house. Luke’s little legs kick excitedly against Eddie’s torso. 

“Hello, my two jesters.” Eddie smiles, holding onto Luke with one hand and ruffling Ryan’s hair with the other. 

“Whatsa jester?” Luke asks from behind his father’s back.

“Like a clown but fancier. For a king,” Ryan tells him.

“And Princess,” Eddie addresses you, doing an abbreviated form of a bow with his son slung over his shoulder, being sure not to drop him.

The name and gesture make you giggle nonetheless, and you can feel the heat climbing in your cheeks.  

Eddie heads towards the kitchen, but Luke starts to flail in his grip, legs kicking dangerously close to a light fixture on the wall that’s already had to be replaced twice because of incidents involving the little boy.

“Waaaait! I hadda question!” 

“What’s up?” Eddie asks as he plops Luke back down on the floor.

Luke raises his eyebrows. “Not for you.” His tone implies that this should have been obvious. The five-year-old turns towards you and gives you his best pleading smile, complete with batted eyelashes. “Will you come trick-or-treating with me and Ryan? Pleeeeease?”

Ryan instantly loves the idea and bounds over to the stand next to his brother, both of them giving you those large Munson eyes that you’re helpless against.  

“Yes, pleeeeeease!” Ryan adds, jutting out his lower lip in a puppy dog-esque pout. 

As if you could say no to them. You didn’t want to either, really. It’d be fun to go around with them, and you’d never turn down time with Eddie. 

Speak of the devil… “As long as it’s okay with your dad,” you tell them.

As one, the boys spin around to face Eddie, giving him the same longing stare. 

“Don’t give me that look; I invented it,” Eddie tells them before looking at you over their heads. “But, of course. You’re always welcome, you know that.” 

“Yesssss!” The boys cheer and you give Eddie a grateful smile. He nods in return before grabbing a beer from the fridge, opening it using the side of the countertop. For some reason, it’s incredibly attractive to you, and you smile at him. 

“Ryan!” Luke says loudly, jarring you out of your daydreams about your boss. Luke turns to his older brother and places his hands on his shoulders. “I have a very important question.”

“What?” Ryan asks, frowning in confusion.

“Are your pillowcases bigger than mine? Cause we gotta use whatever lets us get the most candy!”

“Ooh!” Ryan lights up at the idea. “I’m not sure, let’s go check.”

Eddie turns to you as the boys dart to their rooms. “How long do you think it’ll take them to realize they’re the same size?”

You just laugh, thumbs dancing around each other nervously. “I’m excited to trick-or-treat with you. Them. All of you.” Heat creeps up your neck in embarrassment.

If Eddie notices, he doesn’t show it. 

“Yeah, me too. I gotta warn you, though,” he adds mischievously, “I’m more ‘tricks’ than ‘treats.’”

You furrow your brow. “What does that mean?”

He leans in so his lips are next to your ear, about to let you in on a secret. 

“I’m home!” an already irritated voice calls from the front door. You’d been so caught up in your conversation (flirtation?) with Eddie that you hadn’t even heard Brittany come in.  

Eddie lets out a small groan under his breath that you don’t think you were meant to hear—it’s just that his lips are so close to your ear. 

Brittany strides down the hall and Eddie takes a subtle step away from you. His wife hardly spares a glance in the direction of you two as she continues down the hall towards the master bedroom.

“I should head out,” you say, eager to avoid any more Brittany appearances. 

“Drive safe,” Eddie says. “Lots of weirdos out there around Halloween.”

“I’m a college student,” you remind him. “I’m very used to weirdos.”

Eddie chuckles and you give him a wave before walking out of the kitchen, exhaling a long-held breath once the door closes behind you. 

On Halloween, Ryan and Luke come bounding out of school, even more hyper than usual. They come bearing crafts that they made in school and chatter on a mile a minute about the fun activities they’d done that day in their respective classes.

“Are you guys sure you need more candy?” you tease. “Looks like you’ve had enough sugar to last a lifetime.”

They just chant “more candy” in response, and you regret even asking. One of them hyper, you could handle no problem. But when it’s both of them? This is how you assume zookeepers feel while trying to care for the monkeys.

“Whatcha dressing up as tonight?” Luke asks once their chanting has come to an end.

“Ah, that’s just gonna have to remain a surprise,” you tell them, a smirk growing on your lips even though they can’t see it from the back seat.  

Once they figure out that they’re not going to break you and get the information they want, the car ride is filled with them singing at the top of their lungs, even Ryan, who is usually much more reserved. They jump from song to song: some they must know because of Eddie and some from Disney movies. 

Despite their protests to rifle through their bags when you get home, you manage to get them to eat some apple slices with peanut butter for a snack. Something healthy before their mouths feast on the pounds of sugar they’ll collect tonight. 

They still have an abundance of energy, so you get the idea to teach them the Time Warp dance. It’s something you remember learning long ago—from your sister, actually. And even though they are far too young to watch The Rocky Horror Picture Show, it’s still fun to pass on the iconic choreography to the brothers. 

It also serves as a means to distract them since they’ve now tried twice to peek inside your bag and find out what your costume is. All attempts were unsuccessful. Maybe soon they’d actually start believing that you have eyes in the back of your head. 

You’re just finishing up cleaning the dishes as they jump to the left and step to the right, when the front door opens. Fight or flight instinct kicks in as you freeze on the spot, ready to protect the boys against the mystery intruder. But you relax as soon as Eddie calls out, “who’s ready to trick-or-treat?”

Ryan and Luke run over to their dad as usual, even more excited than they normally are since he’s come home early. 

“Look what we learned!” Luke exclaims, and the two of them execute the moves to The Time Warp as well as they can without music. It’s a little stiff and robotic, but they give it a valiant effort. At least Eddie was able to figure out what the hell they were doing.

“All right, little Riff Raffs,” Eddie chuckles, ruffling their hair. “Let’s get going before it gets too dark.”

“We’re not afraid of the dark!” Ryan protests. 

Eddie points to you as you step out of the kitchen, a shit-eating grin on his face. “She is.”

If the boys weren’t there, you’d flip him off; instead, you stick out your tongue. 

“Don’t worry, Sweetheart,” he coos, “I—we’ll protect you.”

“My hero,” you playfully gush, hands coming up to clasp beneath your chin and your voice going an octave higher to portray your role as the damsel in distress. 

The boys shuffle off to their rooms to change into their costumes, and you go into the bathroom to do the same. You unzip the old, faded gray duffel bag and take your fairy costume out piece by piece, the bright colors contrasting nicely in the mostly black and white bathroom. It would be a little difficult to attach the baby blue wings in the cramped space of the bathroom, so you decide you’ll do that last, out in the living room. The off-white dress you zip yourself into is off the shoulder and the short skirt has layers of cream-colored chiffon resting atop one another. The ballet flats you slip into are the same shade of white as well, with a touch of silver glitter sprinkled on them thanks to one of your friends in the art department at school. Deciding it’s probably easier to put your fake pointed ears on before your flower crown, you struggle to get the right ear to stick. Once it’s successful, you pick up the beautiful, thick flower crown adorned with red roses, pink peonies, and yellow carnations. It takes a little maneuvering to get it to sit on your head just right, but you smile to yourself in the mirror once you’ve got it just how you want it. You inspect yourself as you’re looking in the mirror and decide you’re glad you chose this costume. Of course, since Eddie’s going to be seeing you in it you want to make sure it looks good. 

Bringing the wings and bag out with you, you make your way back into the living room.

“What do you think?” you ask Eddie, mustering up all your courage to give a little twirl. The layers of your skirt spin with you, giving a cool breeze to the tops of your legs. 

Eddie swallows thickly. “Wow, um, I mean, you’re…” Hot. Gorgeous. Sexy. The girl of my goddamn dreams. “…a fairy,” he decides lamely. 

You nod, trying not to show your disappointment at his reaction, or lack thereof. “Yeah, I am,” you say softly. “My friend is going as one, too, so we’ll kinda match.”

Eddie wrinkles his nose. “Which friend?”

“Just someone from school. But we’re both going to the same party tonight, so we figured it would be fun to have similar costumes.”

“Oh, right, yeah.” Of course you’re going to a party. You’re young and carefree. Was he really expecting you to stay here with him and the boys? What would you do, curl up on the couch and watch Charlie Brown and his pumpkin while snacking on candy? And then after the kids go to bed, you and he would taste the chocolate on each others’ tongues—

“We’re ready!”

Luke’s announcement catches Eddie off guard and startles him. He’s quick to compose himself though and gives his boys a bright smile.

“Let’s head on out.”

“Wait, I’m coming!”

Luke’s slightly shorter legs have him trailing behind his big brother as they climb the small hill to the next house. The orange streetlight glints off the golden dog tag resting against Ryan’s, or Scooby Doo’s, throat. The younger Munson brother’s hand comes up to keep his pirate hat in place as he struggles to catch up. 

The boys have all but forgotten that you and Eddie are there with them. The pair of you trail along behind the two excited boys, strolling leisurely in the chilly air and enjoying talking with one another. 

“Do you think the constant running will balance out any effects from the sugar so that they might actually fall asleep before four in the morning?” Eddie asks. He shakes his head in amusement as Luke barrels up to the next door.

“Unlikely,” you say with a chuckle. “But don’t worry, I’ll make sure they’re all hopped up on candy again when you come home from work tomorrow.”

Eddie narrows his eyes at you and even in the dim lighting as you walk in the dark patch between streetlights, you can tell how nonthreatening of a gesture it is on his face. You don’t dare for a moment think that Eddie isn’t capable of an intimidating look. Without a doubt, you know Eddie would flip a switch if anything happened to either of his children. You would never want to see anything happen to your two favorite boys, but part of you is curious what temper Eddie hides beneath the coveralls and metal band t-shirts. 

“You want me to fire you, huh? Is that it?” Eddie teases, bringing you back to the conversation at hand. 

“Oh, please,” you say, shrugging your bare shoulders. “You wouldn’t know what to do without me.”

You have no idea how right you are, Eddie thinks. He pretends to consider your words though, as he slips his hands into the pockets of his denim jacket—one better suited to combat the wind tonight than his usual leather. 

“I don’t know,” Eddie playfully muses. “How about you ask that friend of yours tonight if they’d be interested in babysitting two adorable, if not slightly crazy, little boys?”

Your responding giggle is like air to Eddie; he needs it so desperately that it goes far beyond a want or a craving. Each laugh of yours has him feeling like he’s Tinker Bell who needs applause to keep himself alive. 

“Lily serves coffee all day, so she could just as well give that to the kids. I think candy is the better option here,” you say, pulling Eddie out of his thoughts. 

Okay, the friend tonight is a girl, Eddie thinks with relief, before it’s quickly replaced by guilt. Why should it matter to him anyway? But it does and he’s in deep enough where he can admit that to himself. She said they were going as fairies, of course it’s a girl friend. But aren’t you glad to have that bit of confirmation? Jesus Christ, Eddie. Stop having internalized conversations with yourself and listen to what the intoxicatingly beautiful fairy next to you is saying. 

“…my sister’s for Thanksgiving, but I’m not sure if that’s going to happen,” you’re saying as Eddie manages to zone back in. “Do you know what you guys will be doing?”

“Uh…” Eddie stammers as he tries to shake the cobwebs out of his brain. “I think it’s our house this year.” Eddie scratches at his stubble as he thinks back to whatever Brittany yammered on about Thanksgiving a few weeks ago. “My uncle might be coming over. Or Britt’s sister and family. I don’t know, I’d rather just go over to my uncle’s place, honestly. Bring the kids back to the home I grew up in and have a nice dinner.” He’s babbling, but he can’t stop himself. “H-Have you met Wayne?”

You nod, confirming with a kind smile. “A few times. He seems really nice, and he obviously loves the boys.”

“Yeah,” Eddie beams. He’s so used to Brittany bashing his uncle that he’s caught off-guard by your compliment. “He pretty much raised me, so Luke and Ryan are like grandkids to him.”

Your heart soars, yet you’re compelled to know why Wayne took care of him instead of his own parents. It’s not a discussion for right now, so you tuck the thought in your pocket and move on. 

“If you need a babysitter to keep an eye on the kids while you get the cooking done, just let me know,” you chirp. 

“Thanks, Fairy Princess.”

“Any time, Boring, Costume-less Man.”

Somehow despite all the energy they previously possessed, the boys drag their feet on the way back to the house. At one point, Eddie even throws Luke over his shoulder, the little boy slowing you all down so much with his tiny, tired steps. Happily, you hold his plastic pirate sword in one hand and pillowcase full of candy in the other as Luke is slumped down his dad’s back. Ryan trudges along beside you, each of his steps looking like it’s heavier than the last. You duck your head away to hide your smile; it’s just so nice to see him tuckered out after a fun evening with his family—and you, you mentally add. As much as you’d love to be part of this family, you’re still just a paid employee. 

Even through his massive lack of energy, Luke still begs to go through his collected stash before they go to bed. Because he can tell his youngest is wilting fast, he gives the okay while Ryan gets his pajamas on and brushes his teeth. 

“Both of you tuck me in?” Ryan asks sleepily, the palm of his hand rubbing his left eye.

“Sure thing, bud,” you tell him, following him to his room. You and Eddie tuck both of them in, watching contentedly as they snuggle into their blankets. They’re happy, innocent kids; just as they should be. 

Eddie presses a kiss to each of their foreheads. Luke is nearly asleep, but Ryan musters up the energy to crinkle his nose, looking at you through heavy-lidded eyes. 

“Can you kiss me, too?” he asks, yawning at the end of his question. 

“Me, too,” mumbles Luke. 

You look at Eddie for permission, not wanting to overstep bounds. He smiles and steps out of the way, and you place a soft kiss on their scalps and wish them sweet dreams. 

“Thanks, Fairy Godmother,” Luke says with a sleepy smile.

Jesus Christ, I wish she was your mother, Eddie can’t help but reflexively think, shaking off the idea. Brittany. You’re married to Brittany, and she’s the love of your life. Something nags at him that he shouldn’t have to constantly remind himself about it. 

Oblivious to Eddie’s inner turmoil, you giggle and muss up Luke’s soft curls. “See you tomorrow, First Mate Luke.”

“I’m the capt’n…” Luke slurs as he already falls headfirst into sleep. 

Both you and Eddie head back out to the living room and you scoop up your duffel bag that now holds your clothes from earlier in the day. 

Eddie takes full advantage of your back bring turned to let his eyes rake over you. “Have fun at your party tonight,” he says as he appreciates the curve of your ass. “Just be careful, yeah?”

His eyes automatically snap back up as you turn around to face him, hoping the pink tinge in the tips of his ears doesn’t give him away. 

“Of course,” you assure him. You hike the strap of the bag over your shoulder and give Eddie a smile. “Thanks for letting me come with you guys tonight. I had a lot of fun.” I always have fun with you and the boys, you think.

“No need to thank me, sweetheart,” Eddie says with a chuckle. “You did me a favor being there. Didn’t have to wrangle two hopped up munchkins on my own. Also, I had fun too.” Eddie feels the heat stinging his cheeks at the statement, but it’s the truth. 

He walks you over to the front door and just before you reach for the doorknob you remember the wings attached to your back. 

“Oh. Would you mind unhooking the wings for me? It’d be kind of hard to drive with them on.”

He nods quickly. “Yeah, uh, sure. How do they come off?” Eddie asks.

You turn your back towards him and maneuver yourself so he can see them better. “There’s a little hook about midway down my back. About where my bra clasp is.”

Eddie bites down on his lip to silence any noises that might have wanted to escape him at the reference to your bra and just how close his hands will be to it. That, plus the way your soft dress feels against his fingers as he undoes the hook and the heat radiating off your body has him half hard in his pants. 

Okay, maybe three-quarters hard, but who’s measuring?

A shiver goes down your spine as well at the feeling of his hands so gentle against you. Guys your age just paw at you, treating you like a piece of meat. You’re not used to being handled so delicately. Eddie clears his throat and removes the wings, handing them to you when you turn around. 

“Thanks,” you say, giving him a shy smile.

“No problem.” Thank you for giving me a reason to think about your bra. 

“I’ll see you tomorrow?” 

“See you then.” He winces as he’s sure he’s coming off cold, but really, he’s just trying to keep his composure. You’re going to a college party with college guys; what could you possibly see in a man of his age, who has two kids of his own? 

You open the front door and a chill wind bursts in, making you shiver. 

“It gets cold earlier and earlier each year, I swear,” you joke lamely, forcing a smile through your nerves. 

Before he can overthink it, Eddie quickly grabs his denim jacket off the hook near the door and drapes it over your shoulders. 

“Here,” he says. “Can’t have you getting sick, can we?” 

“Thanks. Again.” You pull the jacket tighter around you, reveling in his scent engulfing you. If the smell of his cologne lingers on your skin, you’ll be hesitant to wash it off. “I’ll bring this back tomorrow.”

“I trust you,” Eddie tells you with a playful wink that sends fireworks erupting in your belly. 

On the inside, Eddie is thinking that you never have to give him back his jacket. He’d rather see you wearing it any day. Though, if he’s being honest, the sight of you in an item of his clothing is not helping the situation behind his fly.  

“Bye, Eddie.”

“Bye, sweetheart.”

You give him one more smile before heading out to your car. 

Eddie closes the door behind you and lets out a long groan. “Fuck,” he mumbles under his breath. He rubs his hands over his face as he heads towards the bathroom. Suddenly he has a whole new variety of fantasies about you to play in his head while he’s in the shower, starring one particular fairy princess. 

As soon as the water is warm enough, he steps into the tub and wraps his hand around his cock. It only takes a few tugs—coupled with images of you—for him to get fully hard. 

You, in your cute fairy costume. 

You, flirting with him and showing off your body. 

“Thassit,” Eddie mumbles to himself, “on your knees for me. Please.” He pictures you following his orders, opening up your mouth as he taps his length on your lips. “Good girl.”

He increases his pace, groaning as he jerks himself. “Love being in that pretty mouth of yours, honey. So warm and wet. Almost as good as your pussy, fuck.” He blinks the water from his eyes. “You knew what that costume would do to me, didn’t you? Knew how fuckin’ hot you looked, hmm? Would be a shame if someone were to…ruin it.”

He can’t help how quickly he cums, grunting and panting as he spills onto his hand. In his mind, his load drips down your once-flawless costume. “Poor little fairy. Christ, you look even better covered in my cum.”

Embarrassment sets in as his orgasm wanes. He needs to stop thinking about you this way. You’re twenty years old, you’re his kids’ babysitter, you’re forbidden fruit. 

What he wouldn’t give to take a bite. 

[oneshotnewbie]

Carina is afraid of Reader getting hurt (she is a police officer) and maybe, just maybe, they get hurt? You don't have to if you don't want to!!

Authors note: This story has been sitting in my finished documents for about two years haha. So maybe it's not all that well written

ᕚ---ᕘ

Working undercover was exhausting, if not draining. You were aware of it both physically and mentally, yet you accepted the job. Accepted it in hope that, like every order, it would pass quickly. You had been investigating undercover in a drug gang for several weeks now. Barely exchanged a word with your wife for endless days to protect her from the cunning mastermind of the gang. Sporadically, there was a short on-minute-conversation at a phone booth here and there, but it was not enough. On both sides.

Carina was worried sick; she only got fleeting answers from your lieutenant on how you were doing. She was so concerned for your life that the brunette even fell ill and had to be hospitalized. When you found out, you wanted to break your cover and risk your life just so you could see her. But she managed to stop you, promising she would take care of herself until you were back home.

You missed everything about the cozy apartment you shared with her. The scent, your bed. Even the smell of cheese that had spread throughout the kitchen. But mostly the closeness of your girlfriend and the warmth that reached you every time you had a hard day at work. All of that you had to exchange for a cold, sparsely furnished one-room apartment outside of the city.

With each passing day it became harder to maintain the disguise. Everything got on your last nerves and ripped you apart. On the very first day, you wished that you could leave work and go back to your family but it had taken you a long time to earn the trust of the drug lord, Joaquín González, before he gave you permission to do big jobs. You were basically his second hand and knew everything about his business.

Even so, you still had to wait to snag all of his followers. At least until this evening where the cruical deal would go through. If everything went smoothly, you could go back to your old life tomorrow. Back to your family. The day passed faster than you could have imagined and it slowly started to get dark. The pink tone of the setting sun gave you a feeling of security and freedom- a feeling you had not had in a long time and made you believe that everything would turn out the way you wished for.

Slowly, you sat down on the chair you had prepared and waited out the last hours before your assignment while you looked through the small window. The landscape was swallowed up in a deep darkness, so completely dark that you felt the cold and hatefulness filling up your heart. Without the feeling, you could not think straight in the violent drug clan. This feeling had changed you, you felt it deep inside. That freezing cold surrounded you and gave you the courage to do any assignment without hesitation so you would not experience pain. But you still hoped to shed that mask once you were safe in the arms of your beloved Italian.

The mask had so often saved you from a mental collapse on missions, that you might not want to take it off as protection for further police operations and it shocked you deeply, that you even believed in wanting to keep it. After each undercover assignment, Carina was always able to give you the feeling of security, and the conscience that everything would be fine again. But you were not sure if she could still save you from what ate away your soul this time.

Of course you knew that she would do everything in her power to get your old self back- Carina had managed it all the time. The brunette would take care of you, spoil you like your life was more important than hers. This time was different. You had been separated from your old life for far too long to make up for with a few days of utmost nurturing.

A small tear, which you quickly wiped away, rolled down your face. You were not allowed to cry, you had to blame yourself for your fate and now you had to face the consequences.

ᕚ---ᕘ

"Where is she? Where is Y/n?" yelled a rough and worried voice at a nurse of the emergency room and you could immediately assign it to Carina. Frantically, she made her way to search between the occupied beds for the woman for whom she was the emergency contacts. „Deluca, calm down. She is here, I will lead you to her"

To her ears, the spoken sentence of Owen Hunt sounded like a war. Knowing the seriousness of the situation, she felt nothing but pure fear. Worries enveloped the woman and she could not imagine finding you badly injured somewhere in the emergency room and realizing that you were hovering between life and death.

The brunette swallowed hard. She missed you so much and just wanted to back healthily. Quietly, she trotted behind the head of trauma surgery, very carefully and slowly, until she came to a stop in front of a curtained bed. There, she already heard your pain-distorted grumbling while stilling in her movement.

Carina had never forgotten how your voice sounded, longed for it every single minute of the day. And now, hearing it without the hum of the phones terminating line, her heart was racing like the first time she had met you. She was only centimeters away from you, as close as she had not been for a long time. "It hurts like hell!"

"I wanted to give you a pain hemmer but you refused," she heard the soft chuckle of Miranda Bailey and a stone rolled from her heavy heart. You were not badly injured, at least not bad enough to be concerned for your life. "Now live with it"

As the brunette doctor moved the curtain with a firm grip to gain access to you, she looked down at you with glassy eyes. Your clothes and face were spattered with dirt and blood, your jeans cut down on one leg to the thigh. Her eyes widened to the bulled hole in your femur, blood still dripping slightly through the stitches already in place.

"Bella, what happened? Stai bene?" (Are you alright?) her voice trembled and was overwhelmed by choked tears. She sneaked through the narrow space between bed and curtain and knelt down next to it. Her warm hand softly cupped your cold one, that was gripping the bed sheets, and squeezed it tightly.

"The deal was overrun by my colleagues. The shooting was in full swing and some were trying to escape. I wanted to help another police officer and I caught a ricochet myself. It is half as bad, it was a straight through shot"

Disorted in pain, your body tensed up briefly before relaxing shortly after; abruptly pinching the hand of your wife before your eyes turned back to her. Deeply, her fawn eyes stared at you, some pitiful tears welling up from them before they closed. "For a brief moment I thought I lost you, mi amor"

Thinking lines appeared on her face and you swallowed impercepitibly. You knew her mind was working through every negative scenario she had ever saw in movies. A faint smile appeared on your face and you broke away from her before you put your hand under her chin and tenderly pulled her to you. "Carina, look at me"

The addressed opened her eyes slightly, pure was immediately recognizable. A tear rolled down the Italian´s face and she grabbed your midsection to cross the last empty space between you. "You did not lost me. I am still here"

Gentle kisses spread across her ruddy cheeks, forehead and nose; trying to catch her bitter tears. You hated when she cried. But you hated yourself even more for causing those sadness upon her. Such a great woman like Carina did not deserve to be in a constant state of fear and you were more than sorry. It broke your heart and shattered it into pieces. 

"You won't do me another mission like this. Mai più, capito?" (Never again, understand?) she said insistently. Her arms broke free from you and crossed over her crumpled pink scrubs, expertly starting to pout. "Se lo fai di nuovo, ti uccido io stesso" (If you do it again, I'll kill you personally)

That it was your last police operations for the time being, which you would do in the next few weeks, was more than clear to you. But you did not care. The most important thing you had to worry about now was your wife, whom you had neglected for weeks, and your health.

[doublel27]

We Are: Queer Found Family and Romance

Or the meta I didn’t intend to write.

It’s taken 9 eps (of me admittedly watching We Are through gifs and clips on Twitter, because I have yet to pay for iQIYI and I am bad at grey watching) but I think I have figured out the central conflict/plot of We Are and why the mostly linear narrative of Phum and Peem with the in media res relationships of our other three pairings made this impossible to fully tease out until we got all the pieces.

The through line that connects all of these stories about how incredibly hard it can be to be part of a queer friend group when the lines of friendship and romance blur, especially when there’s a real aspect of found family to that group.

Two things really cemented it for me this week: Tan telling the gang (and therefore the audience) the full scope of his background with Fang, as well as the beginning of Phuwin’s IG live where he talks about why he likes Kluen as a character is that he’s very direct with people he likes and isn’t blurring the lines between friends and possibly fucking up the friendship.

Because that’s the central problem that all four main couples of the show grapple with in different ways. I’m gonna get into all of that under the cut.

I’m going to start with Tan and Fang because aou contains multitudes and is my beloved while going for Fang could have always messed up his relationship with Phum, we find out in episode 9 that Tan met Fang first. Unsurprisingly, it’s not a great first meeting between what are seemingly two known fighters of what appear to be rival high schools. But then Tan finds Phum and Fang being jumped by a group from his own high school and saves them and eventually becomes friends with them sometime two years+ before the start of our story. Within this time, Tan falls so far in love with Fang, who can both out bitch and out fight, him that Tan goes full simp instead and cuts out the fighting(love that for him).

And mixing his reveal to his friends of how he met Fang and how Fang eventually consumed his waking thoughts to the point he would wish to order Fang as a pizza topping (my love for Tan is immeasurable).

But take us back to episode 2 (which is now on YouTube for US watchers for how long I don’t know) and Tan has clearly not seen Fang in awhile. He asks Phum to invite Fang out where Tan will happen to be. At the time, it was taken as Tan and Phum are university friends and Tan and been obsessed with Fang ever since and needs Phum to make the connections. But the clues that Tan and Fang were also close were already laid down. Their exchange goes:

Tan: Hey. It’s been awhile. Right?

Fang: I thought you were dead.

Tan: Come on. I haven’t seen you in ages either. (That’s the English translation, but the flow of the conversation connotes that Fang hasn’t sought him out either)

At which point Phum makes the face he always makes when Tan is in Fang hyperfocus mode of looking away and sighing. And Fang pointedly asks why Phum invited him out and what is going on.

Which is a weird exchange when you think Tan is Phum’s friend who is obsessed with Fang. It is a less weird exchange between friends that have been avoiding each other for an unspecified amount of time. And we can assume Tan started avoiding Fang because he was madly in love with him and didn’t know how to handle it and didn’t tell Fang why he was avoiding him.

In the episode 9 speech to his friends, Tan outlines that he didn’t think Fang would ever reciprocate his feelings (that it was impossible) and didn’t want to fuck with the friendship (at which point Pun sends a longing look to Chain but we’ll get back to that later) with Fang and Phum and he buried it. Until he couldn’t live with it any longer and decided to do something about it.

Which with the limited information we have, his feelings were already fucking with his friendship. He already didn’t know how to approach Fang because of his feelings at the start of the show, so is it better to not try and hope the romantic feeling dies while avoiding your friend or shoot your shot and maybe get a boyfriend out of it or maybe continue to fuck up your friendship. Tan chooses to roll the dice and it’s clear from the moment they leave the bar in episode two that Fang likes him back.

They both watch each other when they think the other isn’t looking. Fang is the one who sends Phum and Peem home together and sets himself up with a taxi ride with Tan. It’s particularly interesting to me after episode 9, this exchange, because Fang looks at a passed out Peem, mouths Peem? And proceeds to ask Phum if this is the guy that hit him while Tan snickers and Peem looks like the saddest wet cat. It’s only after the affirmative from Phum that Fang is essentially like “well, you can take him home Phum. Take home your drunk friend who hit you and I will go home with Tan.” Which our besotted Tan jumps at.

And considering the parallel between Tan and Fang meeting and Tan immediately sassing him and Fang throwing a punch leading to a fight, and Phum ruining Peem’s painting which led to mutual sassing and a kick to the nuts and a fight…I don’t know if Fang is a mastermind and connected the dots because these brothers need someone who will occasionally not be afraid talk back if need be and sees the potential for Phum to care as much about Peem as Fang does for Tan. Or if he just wants time alone with Tan and doesn’t see it. Look, I wouldn’t be surprised if Fang is secretly a long game mastermind.

Once they’re alone, Tan and Fang steal glances and flirt in the way that Tan makes very loud attempts at flirting and

Additionally, Fang is reserved like Phum, and seemingly as isolated as his only friends seem to be Phum’s friends. We don’t know if he is just not paying attention to other members of the architecture faculty or knows stuff about Kluen he won’t share. As previous parts of this narrative are folded in later episodes, we may find out. What we do know is he’s either ever only appeared alone or in connection to Tan and Phum and Phum’s friends. Even with the flashbacks, Tan points out that the head of the Fang, head of cheer club, approaches him alone and later it’s just Fang and Phum when Tan finds the group of guys jumping them. We know he and Phum adopt Toey who is bullied in high school. It makes sense why he’s potentially reserved about pushing things with Tan if Tan becomes his first real high school+ friend that he has outside of his brother.

Which is why by the time we get to episode 5, Fang says yes before Tan finishes talking. He’s been waiting but also wasn’t willing to be the first to put himself out there. And considering how much Fang and Phum seem to live in their heads and not in the world with everyone else, I can see why he needed Tan to be the one to commit to it first, especially with Fang’s later comments about not understanding why hanging out with him is a preference of Tan’s. I do hope we cross his “don’t tell tan how gone I am on him” bridge later in the narrative. Cause I think Tan knows, but also it’s nice to hear.

Let’s go back to another long-suffering pair where only one half really knew why they were suffering, and the other got a nasty shock, QToey.

I know the guys are all team if Toey loves Q and Q loves Toey then why is Q so hesitant? And I get it, but let’s talk about the double shock Q suffered and the potential layers of risk Q is facing.

It’s not just that Q is cautious with his heart. That is a factual truth. It’s why he ghosted Milk Frappe Boy, because while he fell in love with Milk Frappe Boy I think there was a deep worry, and a self esteem issue that the reality of Q, instead of Pencil Senior, would not be enough for Milk Frappe boy. So Q bolted and then deeply regretted said bolting enough say so to both Toey, not knowing the truth, and to Peem.

But the fact that he learned that Toey was indeed Milk Frappe boy at the same time he learned all of his best friends, his family for all intents and purposes, also knew and no one told him. And the way the confrontation is staged between Q and Toey, it is Q against Toey and everyone else is behind Toey.

And that, friends, that’s the real third rail for Q.

It’s one thing to know that he loved Milk Frappe Boy and that he loves Toey. And that is scary enough. The fandom loves to joke about how Toey is everyone’s little brother and they’ve all adopted him: and that is a correct assessment. But that means if Q fucks it up with Toey, he stands a chance in his mind of everyone else choosing Toey over him.

That fear doesn’t even feel that unfounded when everyone calmed Toey down mostly before Peem, Q’s true bestest friend, came out to be with him. Like Peem caught Toey before going after Q. The next episode nearly every character but Q (aside from Fai who is at all connected to this group) shows up to plan how to support Toey in getting Q.

And while I know my brain cell-less brain trust fully believe they’re helping Q, no one actually seems to ask what Q wants. Aside from Peem trying to get him to come to some that first night on the curb, no one ever asks. And that night all Q wants is to sleep in a pile with his four best friends, because that’s his family. Losing them is even scarier than losing Toey. In essence he’s lost Milk Frappe Boy once. He could do it again. But if they chose Toey…IDK.

We don’t know anything about their families really, aside from Peem’s lovely aunt and the fact that Phum doesn’t get along with his dad. And I get why when the focus is really on these large groups of found families (that are becoming one large found family) that the audience is really in love with. The bonds between the friends are just as much a part of the romance as the actual romances. Because the friendship is where the complications come from.

And while I can’t speak to mlm spaces, as I have never identified as a man, within queer wlw and non-binary spaces there are jokes about dating yourself out of friend groups. There are people you used to know who you don’t anymore because you dated someone in the friend group and were too new and got bounced. Or you date and the way it ends make everyone choose one side. Or, a person in the friend group has a crush on another person in said group, that is an open secret but when the person who was crushed upon gets a new relationship people get mad at them for not dating the person in the friend group who liked them all along because didn’t everyone know. (None of these are from personal experience I assure you 🙃)

And it doesn’t always happen like that. Sometimes the people figure out a friendship or a queer platonic solution when they’re not attracted to each other anymore. Sometimes they orbit around the friend group like two comets on opposite trajectories, occasionally crossing in awkward moments. Sometimes everyone gets past the weird. Sometimes no one does.

But that’s the risk that we’re playing in this show. I can choose the romance, but if it doesn’t work out, I am gambling this safe zone.

Which is gonna bring me to our last two pieces of this: one has had the most development and one the least but both are struggling.

I’m gonna start with Chain and Pun who are the most unhinged, gay yearning codependent besties that exist in the middle of the week and give Potae and Payos on Only Boo a real run for their money. (Both have lips touching earlobes and I don’t have a platonic answer for either) The thing is, I think both Chain and Pun are very aware of the mutual feelings. They both have moments where you know they’re aware but neither will do anything about it. And they are in the case of the story, the most embedded in one single friend group, and have the potential to explode their core group of five if things go sideways.

Now, they’re also the pair that has been effectively dating this entire time without actually dating. The ear biting and the blowing on things in the other’s mouth and the…I don’t have platonic explanations for their behavior okay? I don’t. Not naming it keeps it from being real though. It’s a collective hallucination or the biggest game of chicken.

Eventually, though, one of them is going to cross the line in a way that can’t be erased or the line redrawn. And it’s gonna have to be big because their friends watched them gaze longingly into each other's eyes for 20+ seconds and thought it was normal. Because this is how they are.

And that brings us to not quite friends not quite lovers and not quite enemies, Phum and Peem. The risk is, as discussed in many other metas, mostly on Phum’s side here and it’s why he spent the episode so hesitant. Yes he started off particularly entitled and rude. His and Peem’s relationship started as a fight (but so did Tan and Fang) and Phum feels incredibly comfortable with Peem. He’s definitely neurodivergent coded my Phum, which doesn’t make his assholery okay, but it explains his hesitancy to try new things and his struggle with making friends and expressing his feelings.

He’s got friends but he doesn’t feel particularly deeply connected to them. Yes, Beer makes time for him and actively seeks him out to give advice. He and Fang have a level of sibling codependency that hints at neglect and Fang protecting Phum at all costs. We see Tan approach Phum most of the time and while some of that is angling to get to Fang, Tan does genuinely care. But Tan is also incredibly loud which seems to be a lot for our neurospicy Phum, and Tan also has his large found family with Peem. Same with Toey, who Phum and Fang adopted long ago, and clearly Phum adores him, but he’s also the little brother of the art faculty.

And Peem is a very loving and giving soul and he makes time and space for Phum even though he’s annoying and high handed and gets Phum out of his ruts and comfort zones. And Phum clearly wants Peem to choose him, because Phum has already chosen even if he hasn’t said “I like you and want to date you.” He’s said other very direct things about how safe he feels with Peem and how connected he feels to other people by hanging out with Peem. And Peem is this safe space for him to go out and connect with the world without it being overwhelming and he even feels more connected to his own friends.

And that’s the danger that Kluen represents and what Phum struggles with. He wants Peem to choose him, but he also doesn’t want to force Peem to make a choice and not choose him, and then lose out on the experiences he’s building with Peem as well as a break in some of the connections he has with the people closest to him as Fang and Toey find love within Peem’s group. And so again, the question comes around, is it better to stay in this limbo where no one says anything and maybe Peem dates Kluen but I get to keep him as a friend, or do I roll the dice like Tan and maybe win.

I think it’s been a hard thread to pull because without the context of Tan & Fang meeting first, and Phum and Peem mending their relationship to become something akin to friends who kiss sometimes and don’t talk about it, and the lingering feelings of betrayal for Q by his friends (where they learned about his largest secret/mystery and NO ONE TOLD HIM) which are later revelations in the course of the show, they feel like different types of love stories without the mess of friendship blurring the lines. The story feels linear, because we start in a school year with the meeting of Phum and Peem, the connections between the other characters are older than this year, leaving some of their stories in media res.

And it’s an interesting core struggle taking a risk when the line between who you’re friends with, who you depend on, and who you’re attracted to blurs and the potential for rifts in your safety net are everywhere. It’s not the first show with this as a central tangle nor is it specific to queer television. But the reality of the deep ties that can exist within queer friendships and how they form deep supportive communities makes the stakes higher. And that’s why the friendships are developed nearly as much if not more than some of the romances. That’s where a lot of the risk lies for these characters.

Anyway, that’s nearly 3K of thoughts I didn’t know I had in me about We Are until today. But here we are.

[lemonmoonlavender]

whats up guys im here to introduce you to:

the vat7k pizza heroes au

(aka a really stupid idea i had after listening to lemon demon)

the gang is a group of vampire hunters disguised as a pizza delivery service!

first up is hugo! he is the distraction, who goes to the front door and pretends he got the wrong house to stall for time

basically it thought "who would be the most miserable pretending to be a minimum wage worker?" well its hugo, obviously, look at him.

next are varian and nuru, who sneak into the house while hugo is using his natural charisma to fuck up a vampires life! they break in and set up traps

varian dresses like he only shops at a small thrift shop just outside a farming village in bakersfield and nuru dresses like she only knows what hot topic and etsy are

finally of the group is yong! he oversees everything from the van, checks all their bodycams and tells them if any complications are occurring, like if hugo needs to stall for longer or varian and nuru need to get out as quickly as possible

as someone who loves interesting outfits, it pained me to design one for a 12 year old boy.

so i actually came up with this 2 years ago when i hadnt even known about tangled the series, and shamefully was a huge dsmp fan. it was originally just ranboo, tubbo and tommy, and i very quickly forgot about it, even though i liked the very silly idea

then about two weeks ago i thought "holy shit remember that au i made" so friendship ended with dsmp (two years ago, actually, so this thing was thought up only a few months before i dropped it) vat7k is my new best friend

so idk how germany works but theyre in germany so ill figure it out <3

ill get drawings of the others later! just so you know some of your beloved (or beloathed) characters may be vampires, and rapunzel is like one of my favourite character designs next to nurus (maybe im just a girl liker)

[katakaluptastrophy]

Instantiating the Trinity and the Second Resurrection.

I have spent way too long wondering what on earth was going on here:

G— on his way with the nuke. The ships on the launchpad, twenty hours to go now, less. So much waiting around. Me in my bedroom with a nun and a migraine, her thinking that if she pushed me enough we’d instantiate the Trinity and we’d all be saved. Everyone else drinking.

What on earth does "instantiate the Trinity" mean? What did the nun think she was doing? What did she think John was?

This happens in John 1:20. What is John 1:20 in the Bible?

And he confessed, and denied not; but confessed, I am not the Christ.

It's where John the Baptist is asked if he is the messiah and says that he is not.

But what other role does John the Baptist play in the Bible? As his name might suggest, he baptises. He baptises lots of people, but specifically, he baptises Jesus.

But before he does that, he's out in the wilderness prophesying the end of the world: he warns people of "the wrath to come" and criticises the corrupt authorities and those hoarding wealth and resources. He gets into some trouble with the authorities. All themes that either have or are about to become very pressing in John 1:20...

And then Jesus comes along to be baptised:

In those days Jesus came from Nazareth of Galilee and was baptized by John in the Jordan. And when he came up out of the water, immediately he saw the heavens being torn open and the Spirit descending on him like a dove. And a voice came from heaven, “You are my beloved Son; with you I am well pleased.” (Mark 1:9-11)

After all his prophesying and calling people to repentence, John the Baptist does something very specific. And suddenly God the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit are all seen together. The gospel passages describing Jesus' baptism by John are some of the key texts that underpin the Christian theology of the Trinity.

The nun has watched John warn people of the doom to come, criticise those who ignore those warnings and value wealth and power. She has watched him perform miracles. And as the clock ticks closer, she is waiting for his moment.

Just as John the Baptist proclaimed the beginning of Jesus' ministry, his actions tearing the heavens open and revealing the truth of God, does the nun expect some climactic action from John to reveal God at the end of days? The book of Revelation too describes heaven as standing open and the figures of the Trinity in action as the end of the world begins.

The nun thought John was a prophet whose decisive action would herald this opening of heaven, the revelation of God, and the end of the world.

When John says she thought "we'd all be saved", that doesn't mean global warming would be fixed, everything would go back to normal, and John and the gang would get tenure and posters of their faces. It means they would all be Saved. The world would end and they, followers of the prophet of the apocalypse, would be amongst "the blessed and holy who share in the first resurrection. The second death has no power over them, but they will be priests of God and of Christ and will reign with him for a thousand years." (Rev 20:6)

This might be starting to sound familiar. Abigail Pent talks about the horrors of a second death. John describes how he picked a worthy few to resurrect and be his followers...

John, of course, was not a prophet. He did not crack open heaven and instantiate the Trinity. He did not usher in the Kingdom of God. He did fundamentally fuck up the boundaries of metaphysics, declare himself god, and then proceed to badly plagiarise the Book of Revelation.

Because what happens next in the Bible may again sound familiar... After that thousand year reign, the Devil is released from prison. There's a final battle. And then, there's the second resurrection:

The sea gave up the dead that were in it, and death and Hades gave up the dead that were in them, and each person was judged according to what they had done. Then death and Hades were thrown into the lake of fire. The lake of fire is the second death. (Rev 20:13)

Waiting in death, in the sea or in the underworld until a second resurrection and judgement - where have we heard that before?

Magnus coughed in a genteel Fifth House way, and said, “Who wait for our Lord’s touch on the day of a second Resurrection.”

Although Abigail Pent suspects the metaphysical reality is rather different, this is the eschatology of the Houses: the world ended and the righteous dead were raised by god and they and their descendants live in his myriadic reign. And when that reign ends, he will raise the ancient dead who were not included in that first resurrection and those who wait in the River in a second Resurrection.

What happens after that? In the Bible, the world is destroyed and remade:

Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and there was no longer any sea. (Rev 20:11)

We don't know what the Houses believe will happen at the second Resurrection. We don't know for sure what John is planning. But in light of Revelation, I do wonder about the poem at the start of NTN:

Let’s put this first-draft dream of mine to bed.

In the appointed hour

I’ll pull up your sheets. I’ll kill the light,

Lie down beside you; die; and sleep the night.

This time will be the time we get it right:

Forgiveness not so hard, nor anger long;

Our graves will be less deep, our lies less true.

You held aloft the sword. I still love y-

[theheightofdishonor]

morons (affectionate). They're trying so hard to pretend that they don't want to practice with each other but break the second Yachi gives them a reason too. And she's soo sweet for it too 🥺

[olderthannetfic]

Sending this to you specifically because I feel like you're the only normal brained person about this series.

I read Captive Prince a couple of years ago and liked it fine, as someone who doesn't have a strong preference for or against m/m and therefore isn't well-versed enough in its clichés to notice whether it reads like something full of cliché fanfic tropes. I really liked the use of language, some of the historical/political stuff, some of the ways that the characters are made complicated or unreliable.

The problem is, I've since coincidentally read most of the books that were Pacat's inspiration and. Well. Like 80-90% of the stuff in there has direct parallels in one of those. I'm not sure if there are more than three original thoughts in there.

I am not joking, if you read 1. The Lymond Chronicles and House of Niccolò by Dorothy Dunnett; 2. The Nightrunner series by Lynn Flewelling and 3. The Vampire Chronicles by Anne Rice, you will find that some of the scenes were ripped off beat for beat, many jokes were taken and just lazily reworded, a lot of the character beats and arcs are at best a mashup of 2 or maximum 3 things from those books with the serial numbers filed off really poorly. There's a scene where some characters discover a suicide victim whose structure and descriptions are completely ripped off from another series, except Pacat fails to see what made the original scene so impactful. A lot of the pretty use of language is also directly copied from those, including some really really specific descriptors. It's so blatant!

And I don't see how people are okay with this! I know people who are fans of several of these works and they're totally cool with it! And honestly if it were some rando's unpublished original project I'd be cool with it too, but as a published beloved worldwide phenomenon with rabid fans? C'mon.

And another thing is, all of the other series mentioned above are balls to the wall insane. She just... she just made it bland. She took off most of the edge and reshuffled the elements into a fairly straightforward MLM love story with some light kink thrown in. It's not a BAD series, but I feel like I'm disappointed that someone read all my favourite books and THAT was their takeaway?

--

I started reading, got to the name of the series and burst out laughing.

And, wow, you brought up something totally new that I hadn't thought about! I'm impressed. Genuinely. Usually, I rant about all the reasons I hate the series while debunking the standard anti talking points.

--

I've read the Vampire Chronicles, but that was in the 90s and I read Captive Prince in like 2016 or after. I had zero recollection of common points. I haven't read The Lymond Chronicles despite years of hurt/comfort fans bugging me to do so, and I think I got like a chapter into the Nightrunner series before getting distracted...

The reason I found Captive Prince annoying and derivative is that it also reads exactly like the original m/m that was available when it was first being written, most notably the work of P.L. Nunn who was extremely famous for horny fan art but who also wrote some original m/m fantasy novels. The scene where they finally bone reminds me heavily of the one from... uh... what's the P.L. Nunn one where the prince creeps on that archer dude and he gets raped because of course and then the prince has to be ~patient~ and it's peak boring 2000s rape recovery tropes?

The rape backstory is not only lifted from Fushigi Yuugi (the author's fandom at the time) but is shared with basically 100% of original m/m from that era. It's sometimes the uncle, sometimes the stepfather. One single time that I can think of, it was the foster brother, but mostly it's that "funny uncle" type. Unless it's gang rape from a bad Gundam Wing fic. That was also everywhere.

Once somebody told me the author had previously shipped Tamahome/Nakago, I realized that they'd taken what would be a kind of unusual anime ship and made it a thousand times more boring by dumbing down the scary, tall general with the tragic backstory into an uke-appropriate waif.

So I guess what I'm saying is that there may be some inspiration you aren't familiar with, but it's the same story as what you said above: this is the blander remix.

--

As for why people are okay with this... honestly, most of the people who really adore the series whom I've talked to point to how it encapsulates the exact tropes and tone they loved in anime fic circa 2000.

As a fellow weeb, I loathed the tone of said anime fic circa 2000 and could not wait for tastes to change, so Captive Prince is a hideous blast from an unlamented past for me.

I think most people who love the series aren't familiar with its inspirations. Those that are may have consumed them quite a while ago and don't realize quite how direct the parallels are. Or, for the inspirations that aren't overtly canon m/m, the lure of it being Exactly Right may overshadow other things.

(They also mostly haven't read 90s fantasy doorstops that actually contain political intrigue, tactics and strategy. Captive Prince is a piss poor entry into this genre and should be recced for m/m, not this other stuff people constantly think is in there. None of these characters can reason their way out of a paper bag.)

More than any of that, there's a lot of love left over from when the series was a serialized original story on Livejournal in an era when we had vanishingly few original m/m works, especially long ones in a fantasy alternate world.

I think that is what gets it a pass when a new m/m novel presented as "m/m romance" or posted on one of the webnovel sites would be mocked for unoriginality. Many Captive Prince fans aren't (or weren't when they read it) all that familiar with the smorgasbord of original m/m available today. Many are unfamiliar with anime fanfic circa 2000, so this feels adjacent to the fic they've read but a little fresher... instead of like the week-old sardine tin I found it to be.

[twstjam]

People are always writing Sebek being anti-Malleyuu and it's fun and makes sense but also I love to shake things up so consider:

Sebek being REALLY supportive or actively helping them get together because he's really close friends with Yuu (First Years Gang my beloved).

He's so loyal, dedicated, protective, and eager that I can't help but imagine him being a slightly watered-down version of himself in bodyguard mode with anything that concerns his friends. Let's ignore his stigma against humans for now or say that he's grown past it for the sake of this idea. Imagine Sebek finding out Yuu (or any of his friends, really. Yes this very much includes Silver omg sebesil where sebek gets wary about silver's secret crush who turns out to be him) has a crush or is dating someone. I feel like there's so much potential for him to get all protective and ask a shit ton questions to make sure the crush/partner is worthy of them and confronting the partner to give them the shovel talk.

Now, imagine him finding out that Yuu has a crush on/is dating Malleus, his lord and master. I feel like it could go a lot of ways. He's either:

absolutely ECSTATIC because omg Malleus is amazing he's PERFECT for you and omg you're amazing too you're PERFECT for him OMG YOU'RE PERFECT FOR EACH OTHER!!!

or,

kind of conflicted because he cares about both of them so he doesn't want either of them to end up hurting the other, but BECAUSE they're both some of his favorite people he doesn't want to doubt them, but still he can't help being concerned because there's very much still the possibility of things turning out sour. I can imagine him playing wingman for both of them to make sure things turn out well and that they're both happy.

Just. Idk. Friend-shaped Sebek my beloved QwQ

[ioniansunsets]

may i please have some heartsteel yone/f!reader? i haven't seen much of my beloved producer 🥺

✖ Heartsteel!Yone x Reader ✖

✖ Word Count: 2k

✖ Tags: Long Term Established R/S

✖ A/N: You get together with Yone 10 years ago in Japan. HC Yone as someone who started out DJ-ing at clubs before outgrowing the scene and fading to obscurity online before Heartsteel picked him up.

----  Meeting Him ----

- You met him back in Japan, back when you visited clubs and actually managed to catch his DJ-ing before he quit. It was underground but it was unique. Experimental stuff that just somehow still sounded so damn good to you. You found yourself drawn to him and eventually going up to talk to him during a break between sets. He fell in love with you shortly after, he had a small but loyal fanbase and having someone like you appear at every single one of his performances really weakened the walls around his heart.

- You spent college dropping by any of Yone's appearances throughout your fall quarter and as school went on and as winter break came over, you finally found the time and energy to hang around and visit his other appearances too. Some fun mall gigs, cute online streams in the day, even managing to land a dj-ing gig at a local dance competition. You could tell it was hard, he had a distinctive style that was as much a pro as it was a con and eventually he faded away from performing at all in person.

- It was his 'Final Performance' so the speak. That late night in the club, a drink in hand, bright smiles as you had fun with you friends while watching the elusive masked dj on his little stage. It was his final performance. Now or never to confess your love for both him and his music, your nerves straight ice as the night slowly drew to a close. Unbeknown to you, he too, felt exactly the same as he watched you from the stand. The passing comments and small conversations the two of you shared over the months left him yearning for something more with you.

- And it was sweet when it finally happened. Uncharacteristically gentlemanly coming from a DJ. You stayed as the club begun to close, Yone walking up to talk to you just like any other time a friendly conversation before he offers you a small giftbag, softly telling you its a personal Christmas gift for his most loyal supporter, telling you to open it when you're home. You thank him, pushing yourself to exchange numbers with him so you can give him feedback when you're home safe. You curse as you miss your chance to confess in the heat of the moment.

- As you return home, you pull a thin package beautifully wrapped in the little bag. You unwrap it to find a homemade mixtape, all of your favorite songs from him paired with special unreleased works that he think you would like. How he even managed to know which were your favorites shocked you honestly. As you look into the bag further a sweet handwritten note confessing his budding love for you neatly written in decorative paper falls out. Poetic words with the neatest handwriting, you could swear the paper itself was scented too. Your heart races as you listen to the CD while reading the pages of his feelings. The first thing you ever messaged him was a cute " Yone, I love you too." Which Yone has graciously screenshotted and looked back on often over the years.

---- Heartsteel / Dating ----

- You two are the loving parents of Heartsteel, the comforting consistency, the caring confidants of the group. There was just something nice about seeing Yone and his partner of almost ten years still going strong in such a stable relationship that causes all the boys to look at you with such respect. You have fun with them all, you work hard late nights supporting Yone and his work, you look out for him as he looked out for you. You were as much part of the gang as he was.

- Surprisingly Yasuo loves you just as much (platonically), he's happy to see Yone just genuinely be so at ease around you, to have someone be there for his brother that can actually make the man relax? You have his approval. After moving on and joining True Damage, Yasuo would worry seeing Yone so alone, so having you appear and provide his brother with such companionship made him happy. Though, Yasuo does tease Yone a lot, every time you meet him he always asks you if Yone has proposed. He can't understand how you two have been together so long yet not gotten married.

- Dates with Yone were always so calming. Bringing you out to hot spring inns during stressful times, inviting you to cute hidden cafes to work together, comforting jamming sessions late night at his place if money was tight. Nothing embarrassingly over to top yet not so casual that you felt like the two of you weren't doing anything special. There was just something about the way he just knows what you need. As the years went by you realized it was just how Yone was, he was an attentive guy and especially so when it came to you.

- Also it was no secret that Yone looked at self care as a priority and slowly you picked up on his little habits too. Simple yet small adjustments to your own habits. The way you two would go through the motions of burning incense and making tea early in the mornings for a quick meditation and mindfulness session. The loving way he would cook healthier meals for you, how he would be the one buying bath and beauty products, how he would motivate you to follow him to Kendo lessons to exercise, how he would leave books filled with comments on post-its around the house for you to read when you had time. The softest part was how he never seemed disappointed even if you said no to any of this, he was caring and patient after all, he'll win you over into self help eventually.

- The biggest change with the new popularity of Heartsteel was seeing the sheer number of fans Yone started to get. You almost forgot what it was like being his fangirl honestly, so used to your life with him after his semi-retirement, it was weird suddenly being thrown back to your college days of being in love with that DJ at the club. Sure things were different, you came home to him, you slept by his side every night, you heard all his music before it was released, but still... There was something about the way your heart thrums as you stand in the audience watching Yone lift his mask to throw you a charming smile. There was something about the way you knew when he laughed softly on stage, when he waves to the fans, when the crowd cheers, that the cool DJ standing up there was all yours. Oh it made you smile just as bright.

---- During Touring Season ----

- Being together for so long had its perks and its downfalls, for one, you two had a really nice house together, a place you truly called home. Little bits of Yone all around you all the time in the way the bed smelt like him, the way you see his drinks in the fridge and his things around the room. As much as it all comforts you when he is away, it all also oh so depressingly reminds you how lonely you are without him. At the least, Yone was a man of conviction and strict schedules, without fail every day at midnight where he is, when the concerts over he would always contact you somehow. Be it a call, a message, and photo. He would always make sure to send you at the very least, something, once a day. Lovingly checking in on you to make sure you were ok.

- Sure you had your own life outside of being his loving girlfriend but yet, being by Yone's side was such a commonplace that the emptiness of the house felt foreign after all these years. Yone did his best to make sure you weren't alone though, leaving little notes hidden around the house for you to find and read, leaving you a playlist to fill his study with music so you could feel like someone was still there. Of course he still called you when he could but there were other things too, like how he kept ordering meals for you, secretly asking your neighbors to keep an eye out to make sure you were safe at night, how he actually sent you postcards so you could have a physical reminder that he was thinking of you. It was all so sweet.

- If you could make it to a concert? You had the VIP treatment, he was very secretive, not really having social media, no one really knew he was in a long term relationship with you. But for Heartsteel? Everyone close to Yone knew who you were. No questions asked, a VIP pass thrust into your hands courtesy of Alune who excitedly dragged you backstage to say hi to your partner before and after the performance.

- During the actual show it was crazy, for someone whose style was so underground it was exciting and certainly different to see how wild the crowd was compared to your hazy memories of small secluded rooms in the fringes of Tokyo all those years back. Heartsteel was good for him you had to admit, seeing him on the international stage, seeing him having so much fun with the other boys, seeing the way he was just glowing with joy when people actually hollered and cheered at his beat drops. A warm bubbling feeling rises up in your chest as you see him smile the way he does around you, only this time it was on the big stage. You knew he was happy with his own small fanbase of loyal stans but you two knew better, a tiny fanbase wouldn't pay the bills, being so wildly loved, being able to make music, his passion, for work. Having so many new people hear the same style of mixing that caught your attention years back and actually love it? Heartsteel was a blessing to you both.

- When you run backstage after the performance to congratulate all the boys on the successful performance Yone stands further back. A warm smile on his face as he pulls off his mask to watch you hug and high five everyone else, a mix of feelings as he watches you talk to his bandmate. As the initial greetings pass, you finally walk up to him, everyone leaving to settle their own post performance maintenance. For Yone, that was a little habit of searching for you and reaching out to pull you into a hug. A habit that he once had all those years back, the nostalgia after every performance always hitting him so hard his usually calm and cool demeanor would crack. The lightest tinge of a blush could be seen rising up to his ears as he finally makes eye contact with you. Slowly he walks over, a hand reaching out to beckon you to come over and hold him.

" You were amazing up on stage, I almost forgot how charming you always looked in the DJ booth."

" And I almost forgot how exciting it was to search for you cheering for me in the crowd. Especially when the crowd is that big."

Yone laughs softly. A deep melodic noise that sends shivers down your spine. Oh the way the corners of his lips curl up, his sparkling emerald eyes gaze down at you. His right hand reaching up, the back of his fingers lightly brushing over your cheeks, pushing your hair back behind your ears.

" Just like old times my love?"

" Just like old times Yone."

Carefully, doing his best to make sure his hair doesn't tickle you, the same hand that pushed your hair back now rises to hold his own messy fringe up as he leans down. Gently, just like always. His lips press against yours. Nothing too affectionate, you two were still in public after all, but still you could feel it, the way the softest kiss from your lover fills your chest with such overwhelming love. As you pull back you look up to see a smile so bright that it causes his eyes to close. Ah, you were truly loved.

[hexed-padlock]

Thinking about how elves can reincarnate. What if there are a few individuals besides elves that have a similar ability. Take our dear Tav for example. What if in a past life, they were a great Artificer. Nowadays, they’ve settled for a simpler life alongside their beloved Astarion. What Astarion doesn’t know, however, is that his partner has been working on a special ring for him. Tav went on a small journey without Astarion to look for the Cloak of Dragomir, study it’s enchantments, and create a ring that has the cloak’s enchantments but is able mitigates its negative effects. It takes them months, and the one year anniversary of saving Baldur’s Gate is fast approaching. The last month is spent in a haze of furious work, getting the ring done just in time. They’re always away, spending long hours getting everything perfect. Gale and Tav have been spending a lot of time together researching and working on the ring as a team.

Then the one year anniversary of the Absolute’s defeat comes around. The whole city is in a joyous mood, a massive festival is set to run all throughout the night.

The old gang is back together, standing by the docks once again. It’s dark, but sunrise is just a few minutes away. Tav is by Gale’s side, and he hands them a box with the ring inside.

Astarion sees Gale hand Tav something as Tav gives him a peck on the cheek in thanks. Ah, so this is why Tav’s been so distant lately. He sulks in a corner, self-loathing taking hold. But Tav bounds over, grabs his hands and pulls him out of the shadows.

Astarion looked at their happy expression, noting that daylight was coming. Is this how this’d end? Burning in the sunlight as the love of his life leaves him for that damned wizard? He looks away, refusing to meet Tav’s eyes.

Tav finally registers the expression on his face as guilt grips them. “Love, I’m sorry. I’m sorry if you felt like I neglected you, but all this was for our future. Please look at me.” Hours spent perfecting a gift for him were still hours spent away from his side, they kept it a secret, not wanting to ruin the surprise.

“Starlight, my beautiful night sky. Please.”

And he finally looks at them, and they’re on their knees, holding a box out, a ring with a single glowing stone shining out in the darkness.

“Astarion Ancunin, my love, will you marry me?”

Astarion stares, awe, disbelief, confusion, all warring inside him—But above it all, relief, fear, and love.

Breathless, he whispers, “Yes.”

Tav slips the ring on and pulls him into a kiss, just as the first rays of sunlight bathe the city in a golden glow. Astarion panics for a moment, trying to find shade, before he feels only the warm caress of the sun, and the gentle touch of his lover.

The party once stood upon these docks as the wreckage of the city lay around them, incomplete and fractured as Astarion disappeared into the shadows and Karlach vanished back into Avernus. It was a solemn celebration. Now, they were all finally together, standing in the glorious light of a bright future as the rebuilt city celebrates it’s continued freedom.

The future is bright and the world is so full of color.

[positivexcellence]

Jared Padalecki Says Goodbye to ‘Walker’ and Blasts the CW’s ‘Cheap Content’ Strategy After Show’s Cancellation: ‘F— It. They Can’t Fire Me Again’

The writers first introduced this Jackal storyline at the end of the third season as a way to excavate more demons from Cordell and Captain James’ (Coby Bell) shared past. What did this storyline help you unlock in terms of your understanding of Cordell? What were you most interested in exploring from a character perspective?

I’ve been fortunate enough for many years, many decades, to play characters that are in situations where the story is not about the situation necessarily: It’s about what’s going on with the character. On “Supernatural,” we fought God, we fought Lucifer, I was Lucifer at one point, we fought demons — but it was really about the brothers. It was about a bond; it was about the tropes of sacrifice, loyalty, determination, discipline and so many more things.

So when the Jackal storyline first occurred to the gang, [a serial killer storyline] was something that we hadn’t approached yet on “Walker.” And it’s something that the real Texas Rangers actually get involved with: They do hunt down and investigate serial killer allegations. So it was a fun template with which to play out past traumas, [as well as this idea of] trusting those close to you and them trusting you back and getting out of your head.

I don’t want to say I suffer [from this], but I’m in my head a lot. Partially that’s my nature, just the way I was born; and partially that’s my nurture, being an actor. You have your script, you read it, and you’re like, “OK, now what can I add? What does this mean?” So I just spend a lot of time in my head, and oftentimes it takes somebody beloved that’s part of my circle to go, “Hey, you all right?” And I’ll be like, “Oh shit. Yeah, sorry, I’ve been kind of elsewhere.” So [I enjoyed] playing that role this season, and understanding how the rabbit hole of emotions in your mind can sometimes affect more than just you.

This iteration of “Walker” has always been about Cordell’s neverending internal struggle to find the right work-life balance. For me, he seems to finally recognize that he’s done plenty of great work as a Ranger, but he has yet to really fulfill his duties as a father, even though he is about to become an empty nester. What is your take on where we leave him in the finale?

Yeah, it’s exactly that — and kudos to Anna and the rest of the writing gang. It was a lot of what I was going through [in real life]. It’s a lot of what I’m going through now, having worked since I was 17 years old when I started “Gilmore Girls.” There are a lot of things that you miss when you’re acting — a lot of graduations, camp drop-offs, kids’ games, whatever. It’s a wonderful job, and I’m so grateful to have been able to do it for so long, but there’s a lot that you give up.

So I think where we find Cordell in the finale is exactly in that spot where he’s no longer anxiety- or panic-driven about having to do the next job, having to get up and find somebody to arrest or find something to fix or investigate. He has realized — much to the credit of Jeff Pierre’s Trey, Ashley Reyes’ Cassie, and obviously Coby Bell’s Larry James — that, “Hey, the world goes on without you.” I think Cordell was in his own head for a lot of the episodes, and afraid that if he wasn’t around, things would fall apart. I think he found a place where he is like, “The world was here before me. The world will be here after me. And what I need to do for those around me is spend time with them.” So he’s come to a realization that there’s more than just the next job.

I think it took him — I don’t want to call it rock bottom, but getting out of control with his obsession with the Jackal to realize, “Oh, wait, maybe I need to step away from this for a little bit, and when I come back, I’ll come back stronger and more clear headed.” There will always be another job, but the family is growing up. August is graduating, Stella is in college, and he and Geri are working through some stuff. So I think he realized that, “Hey, I need to put my energies elsewhere.” It’s told in TV form, but it’s a really universal lesson. Sometimes, just doing something different, just changing your routine, can open your eyes to not only the positives of the routine — but also the drawbacks.

The writers have put Cordell through the wringer over the years, but this is the closest that he came to dying. The idea of mortality becomes even more intense when you become a parent — and, in Cordell’s case, a widowed single parent — because you have to think about what you’re leaving behind for your children.

Great point. [My wife] Genevieve [who played Cordell’s late wife, Emily] and I talk about that all the time, as parents. I think this is one of the lessons that both Gen and I hope to give to our kids, and for them to grasp as well. As kids grow up — and even adults — they will often deal with and question: “Is what I’m doing right? Should I be doing something else? If I’m not important here, then am I important at all?” I think part of the reason Cordell makes the decision that he does at the end of the finale is to show his kids: “Hey, I know I’ve been doing this, and it is very important. But so are you. It’s not a ‘no, but.’ It’s a ‘yes, and.’” It takes courage to leave routine, to leave habits, and I think he wants his kids to know, “Hey, it’s OK if y’all have to pivot, if y’all have to change. Do what you know is right, not what you think other people think is right.”

Unlike some other shows on the bubble, you and the writers elected not to shoot an alternate ending. That means you’ve left the audience with a couple big cliffhangers: In addition to taking a leave of absence, Cordell is also planning to propose to Geri; and James Van Der Beek was going to play the Walkers’ new (and potentially nefarious) neighbor. Did you and Anna discuss what next season would have looked like?

Yeah, there was so much to deal with, now that Violet and Kale are both young adults. They’re not children like they were four years ago, both literally and metaphorically. So there was a lot that we were going to explore with them — like, how much the sins of the father can carry down to the progeny, and how much Stella and/or August had, unfortunately, [inherited] their father’s bad qualities as well, which we dealt with this year with Stella. She’s very much like her father in the good ways and in the bad ways.

But we were very excited to have James on the show. He’s a personal friend, and he lives here in Austin. It wasn’t going to be like the Walker-Davidson feud necessarily [from Season 2], and the fifth season was certainly not written by any means, but I think there was going to be a very interesting dynamic that Cordell was maybe not anticipating, because he was taking a backseat on his law enforcement duties. We thought that James and his crew were going to be maybe up to no good, and Walker was just blinded to it.

Walker was a “Hell yes” or “hell no” kind of guy; he was either all-in on something, or he was kind of oblivious to it. And that was good when he was all-in on a job or all-in on trying to work with his family. But it was bad when he was oblivious: “Oh, no, the kids are fine. I’m fine. They’re nice. Don’t be suspicious of this person, or that person.” And he kind of got stuck in his own head, as we all often do at times. So we were going to explore that.

Is there something that you would have personally loved to have explored further with Cordell, if you had been given more time?

Oh my God. How long do you have? I really would’ve done the show forever. I just loved my character. I loved that I got to be in Austin with my family. I loved my cast and loved our crew. Maybe this is what ultimately was our downfall, but we weren’t ever seeking like, “Oh, here’s the explosion. Oh, here’s the wild cliffhanger where the aliens come down. Oh, here’s the next hot reality star that comes in and takes their clothes off.” It was never about sensationalism. It was more about life. When Anna and I first talked about the show many years ago, one of the reasons [this reboot] was called “Walker,” not “Walker, Texas Ranger,” was because he’s a widow and a father who happens to be in law enforcement. It was an exploration of everything that life could have to offer — heartbreak, disappointment, shame, love, becoming an empty nester — and I’m worse than heartbroken that we are not going to get to explore all those storylines. 

You’ve developed a tradition, on both “Supernatural” and “Walker,” of being the one to deliver the news of a renewal or a cancellation to your cast and crew. How did that happen this time around?

Yes. I talked to David Stapf at CBS and Brad Schwartz at CW before the announcement was made. And when Brad and I were talking, he was wildly flattering of “Walker” and what we had done, and he has his directives as well. He asked me, “Hey, how would you feel if we release the news or if you release the news? Do you have a preference? You’re CW royalty. You’ve been here since Day 1. How do you want to do this?” I thought about it, and I was like, “You know what, man? I think it might be best if I go ahead and make the announcement.” He was like, “Cool. Just go ahead.” And I asked him, “Do you want me to send what I’m going to post to you first, or do you want me to just go and post it?” And he goes, “We know you. We love you. We trust you. You don’t need to double check it with me. Just go ahead and send it when you’re ready.”

It was not easy to see the keyboard on my phone through the tears in my eyes, but I was grateful that I was allowed to [do that]. So often, when these big announcements are made, it’s like, “OK, here’s what’s going to happen. Don’t say anything until 1 p.m. in three days because we haven’t called all the outlets yet.” It felt like a very human send-off to go, “OK, do what you need to say, and we will reiterate it.” It felt like a great part of the closure that I’m still seeking. 

Did The CW ever give you a reason for the cancellation? Did it come down to budgetary reasons? Do you know any of the particulars?

Yeah. I talked with the head of CBS and the head of Nexstar/CW, I talked with the other [executive producers] on “Walker,” and I think it was a multivariate kind of issue. My understanding is — and again, this is just what I’m told — that Nexstar is going in a different direction with The CW. I mean, they have an hour of “Trivial Pursuit” and an hour of “Scrabble” coming up. I don’t know why you wouldn’t just download the app or grab a board game and play with your friends, but they’re clearly just — what’s that great quote? It’s like, “If somebody tells you who they are, ask questions. If somebody shows you who they are, believe them.”

I feel like The CW that I was a part of last year is not The CW that I was a part of under [former chairman and CEO] Mark Pedowitz for that entire, almost 20-year stretch. They’re just changing the network around, where it’s not really going to be a TV network as much as it’s going to be, “Here’s something fun for an hour that you’ll never watch again, but hopefully you watch it. And it’s cheap!” And I hate to say that, but I’m just being honest. I mean, fuck it. They can’t fire me again. I’m just being brutally honest. I think it felt to me like they were looking for really easy, cheap content that they could fill up time with.

You’ve only had a few weeks to process the cancellation, but have you given any thought to what you will do next?

I left two days [after the cancellation was announced] to go to Europe for work and then for play. My wife and kids met me out there, and we took a little vacation that was already planned. It was strange, and it was both horrible and wonderful. It was horrible because I really wanted to grieve. I really wanted to sit there and grieve, and call my cast. But here I was, eight or 10 hours ahead of their time zone, and I couldn’t make a phone call to everybody I wanted to make. The texts would come in when I woke up in the morning, and I just wanted or needed a personal connection with everybody who I had worked with for so long. But it was great, because I had a lot of distractions.

But I haven’t taken a whole lot of time just yet to think about what’s next. I kind of said this at the end of “Supernatural”: I wasn’t interested in acting [again], per se. I do love producing. I love the production aspect, and I love the problem-solving that comes with it. So there are a few things that my wife and I are in the process of developing that I would love to produce and act in. But beyond that, I still feel like I haven’t grieved the loss of “Walker,” so I don’t know yet if I trust my feelings. That sounds like a cop-out. I’m so sorry.

No, that’s a totally valid answer, considering that you openly spoke about how you hoped “Walker” would last just as long as, if not longer than, “Supernatural.” It’s natural that you wouldn’t necessarily know where to go from here.

Yeah, I don’t want to disappear into the bushes by any means, but I kind of want to disappear into the bushes. But hopefully, at this point in my life, and much like Cordell realized at the end of Season 4, I need to take a good, long, hard look at my personal life and the time I spend with my family and my friends, and I need to stop being so aggressive and obsessed with work. I still want to work, but for now, you’ll find me in and out of the bushes, hanging out with family and seeing friends. If a project comes up and I don’t care about it, then money doesn’t matter. But if a project comes up and I love the story or there’s somebody I really want to work with, then all right, [I’ll do it].

One of the people that you presumably want to work with again is Eric Kripke, who already recruited your former “Supernatural” costar Jensen Ackles to star in his current show, “The Boys.” Now that your schedule has opened up, are you officially joining the final season of “The Boys”?

Well, I’ll say this: Kripke and I texted today. It’s not been written yet, but I think he was saying [the final season] doesn’t even film until 2025. So yeah, I’m going to go play in Kripke’s newest playground. I had a great time the first time around, so I’m sure I’ll have a great time here again. I love the show. I think it’s hilarious and exciting. But you were asking what my plans for the future were — and I love Jensen and Eric Kripke. Obviously, I’ll be indebted to [Kripke] and entangled with him forever. I met my wife because of him. I was Sam Winchester because of him. “Supernatural” happened because of him. So working with him on a show that I enjoy, I’m like, “Yeah, when do I fly out?” But I don’t think we would film until at least January. 

Your body of work has spanned so many genres, but is there a specific genre that you are looking to explore next?

I thought “Walker” was kind of a mixture of “Gilmore Girls” and “Supernatural.” It was a family show with excitement and stunts, and macro storylines married with the micro. You know what? There’s a script that I love, and if we can get it turned into something, then I’d love to be a part of it. It’s actually a sitcom, but not a slapstick or knee-slapping sitcom. It’s kind of like a family-esque sitcom. It could actually be an hourlong show that you’d kind of define as a sitcom.

One of the things I really enjoyed about “Walker” was the humor that I was able to try and bring to screen, because my characters on “Gilmore Girls” and “Supernatural” were more stoic and serious, and I am by nature a much goofier person than the characters I’d played for 20 years. It terrifies me, because I think I’m funny among friends, but I don’t think I’m a funny person. I just think I’m goofy.

I’d like to explore that. It’s scary. It’s something I haven’t done, and I think I’d be very intrigued. 

It seems very difficult for dramatic actors to make that transition to comedy.

It’s so difficult!

You’ve now starred in over 450 episodes of primetime network TV, which is no small feat. What is your biggest takeaway from the time you’ve spent on The WB and The CW? When you think back to your biggest aspirations when you began on “Gilmore Girls,” how did your dreams ultimately compare to your reality?

Yeah, it’s been a long time. I think there’s some form of the saying, “If I only knew then what I know now…” Oftentimes, [this is] such a cutthroat industry. I think I spent so long in my adult life trying to get to a point where I could live my life, where I felt comfortable, where I felt safe and secure. I love storytelling. I love storytellers. I love raconteurs. I love that friend we all have that can just talk for an hour, and you’re laughing, you’re crying, you’re interested, and you’re learning. I love being able to pretend to be one of those characters on screen.

But I think along the way, it feels like I really learned, “Hey, don’t work to earn. Work to learn.” And at some point in time, you’ve got to look in the mirror and go, “Hey, you’re working towards some ever-moving goalpost. Why don’t you try and enjoy it now?” I think that’s kind of where I sit now. We’re just about a month [removed] from the announcement that we weren’t picked up again, so it’s kind of funny how life imitates art, or art imitates life. What Cordell went through in the finale and what I’m going through now are mirrors. I’ll be 42 next month. Am I waiting until I’m 60 and I have 800 episodes of television or something? I have to live my life now. I’ve got a 12-year-old, a 10-year-old, and a 7-year-old. 

I think, ironically, in trying to tell somebody else’s story for so long, I’ve realized that my story has value too.

Variety