#first manuscript
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bee-barnes-author · 1 year ago
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ISO Beta Readers for a first time novelist!
Hello all!
My name is James, I'm a queer trans man and I'm working on my first manuscript. I'm looking for beta readers that can provide in-depth feedback. I'm pretty terrible at summaries, so I hope what I put here is enticing for y'all LOL
Princess Elida was a lonely girl, until she met her new best friend, Naurcia. In the years following their meeting, the girls end up falling in love. When tragedy strikes Elida decides to become whatever she has to in order to get the love of her life back.
Currently, the novel is at 74k words, with an end goal of somewhere between 80k and 100k words. If you'd like to volunteer please DM me here! I'll provide you with a sample of the novel and if you want to read further I'll add you to the google doc with commenter permissions.
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soleberlandieri · 1 year ago
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oidheadh-con-culainn · 10 months ago
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Hi, with the arthurian legenda being entirely christian, aren't there welsh legends believed to be where the arthurian legends were drived from? Sorry if i misunderstood your point but tmk the christian elements were added later. Not trying to start anything tbc i am honestly curious
the welsh material is also christian, hope this helps 💚
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pangur-and-grim · 2 years ago
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BRO I GOT A FULL REQUEST! HEHHEHEHEHEHHEHEHEHEHEHEHHEHEHEHEHEHHEHEHEHHEHEHEHHEHEHEEHHEHEHEH
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brynn-lear · 5 months ago
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LOCKED AND LOADED [Yandere!Wanderer x Reader]
Prompt: The world is about to end. How will you grieve when you're forced to be with a miserable man until the last second? [Dedicated To: @mixed-kester for the Alone Together Event]
Content Tags: yandere!scaramouche "fluff" oneshot (yes, there are no other parts:]), major persona 3 spoilers but you DON’T need to know the game before reading this since everything is explained, improper use of a S.E.E.S evoker /j, Scaramouche is so normal about you, UNRELIABLE NARRATOR, major character death/s–
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V. Acceptance.
"Where the hell are you, (Y/n)?"
Standing near what should have been the front doors of his university was a short man with dark purple hair. He leaned precariously against them, his head tilted upward as if the sickly green moon's ominous pull was nothing to be afraid of. Gekkoukan University's nearby dorms– fraternity and sorority houses included– are not usually this silent. Instead of people, coffins were aligned perpendicular to the ground.
The wanderer glanced at his watch with mild interest. He had been waiting for a while now. Your guest hoisted himself up, circling the ground with the tip of his shoe. The baseline of his attitude had always defaulted to irritability and passive-aggressiveness. The vertically aligned hour-and-minute hands do not placate it. The timing itself makes it worse.
It's December 31st, 2009, 12 AM– the Dark Hour.
With a harsh sneer, he pocketed his hands. You usually have the door to the Velvet Room open to him whenever. What's the big deal? Were you seriously THAT mad at him? Really? He didn't do anything to warrant this "pettiness". He had never known silence as much as this moment.
You should've accounted for the hostility that proceeds on the "off-chance" he did arrive early.
His tone darkened, his bloodied hands gripping his S.E.E.S evoker tightly.
"If you don’t show up, I will cleanse the world of human emotion all by myself"
You shook from afar, afraid of how he wouldn't hesitate to make his threat a reality. He had already taken so much– you were beyond mad at him. You were terrified. Wronged. Abused. You didn't want to step into the light. Much worse, step into his shadow.
The worst thing evil can do is to turn you into one of them.
He clutched the bloodied yellow scarf in his hands tightly.
Why did this happen?
How did things END up like this?
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IV. Depression.
You took a deep breath and charged forward.
You don't trust [Wanderer] ever since Ryoji told him about the impending apocalypse.
Seldom do you leave the Velvet Room. You weren't hiding in the Velvet room months before the end of the world was imminent. When April had only reached its fourth day, there was nothing you wanted more than to spend time outside. So ignominiously innocent. You did not know who [Wanderer] was and how much effect he would have on your life at the time. You were just tired of the ongoing stream of uneventfulness.
And now here you are, berating the protagonist in full.
"[Wanderer], why is Ryoji missing?! US ATTENDANTS CAN'T FIND TRACK HIM ANYWHERE!!!"
With a fistful of his university uniform, you yanked him by the collar. Your eyes were livid as you reeled your composure. This wasn't what you had in mind when you were "isekai"d into a video game. Out of any game, why did it have to be Persona 3? And out of anyone that could be a protagonist, why did it have to be HIM?!
You thought this would be a grand affair... Whatever they spun in anime back when your reality existed were pure lies. Where are the scenic views? The mountains? The grasslands? This plane of existence you're forced to sit through for eternity was far from the RPG fantasy people would hope for. No closer you could ever be to paradise.
In fact, this man is threatening to ruin said paradise.
[Wanderer] pulled your hands away forcefully. His glare was not that different from yours. "Why do you care about him so much?"
"Oh, I don't know! Maybe it's because his death means forgetting everything?!" You clenched your empty fists. "You know damn well what happens if he dies! You'll lose all the help you can get to stopping the Fall!"
Such a heavy weight on your shoulders but the protagonist doesn't care. This may be a turn-based game– but it wasn't based on you. If it was, you wouldn't be screaming your heart out at him! You wouldn't be an NPC. Hell, you'd probably be a better protagonist than him.
You closed your eyes, took a deep breath, and sighed every stress out of your system.
"Listen—" You rubbed your temple. "You need to start forming bonds. Social links. Support system. Confidants. Whatever you want to call it. You were supposed to have the answer by now as to what life is for."
[Wanderer] remained silent throughout your spiels. His facial expression alone was enough to infer immense disinterest. You were mindlessly doing your job. There will be no tirade or physical aggression that can convince him that you believe in your assertions with full conviction.
"Do you want to see him?"
"Yes! Of course. Knowing you, you're—"
"Tempted to kill him because you think I want the world to end?"
"Obviously."
That's where you're wrong.
A nihilistic man can have other reasons to commit murder.
"But if he's missing, you can forget about him, right?"
"What on earth are you talking about?!"
[Wanderer] turned around. "Meet me later, you know the time."
"I'll show you where Ryoji is."
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III. Bargaining.
XX/09/2009
He doesn't recall the time he was brought into this world like you had.
Puppets are malleable. Memories are easy to overwrite when your body is held together by white wood and "khemia". His past evades him.
Maybe it's better this way.
He took you to Chagall Café. Although it was your first time out in a long while, he had no qualms about ignoring your questions. He feigned deafness as you asked about the news, his college life, friends, or anything related to what was happening in 2009. And he even ignored your humble request to buy the cheapest coffee for you. Instead, he bought you a chocolate frappe.
"For Elizabeth's cutest little sibling." He said, sarcastically copying Elizabeth's tone as he sharply handed the drink. "Wouldn't want everyone's darling to get a caffeine addiction."
Thanks, asshat.
Of all his offensive behavior— he really spent more money just to insult you. You shook your head and accepted it. It's the most expensive one on the menu too. What dedication to being a hater. But before you could open your wallet, he shot your payment down.
"Just take it." He smirked. "Look at you, paying me back for treating you poorly. Are you a masochist?"
You immediately shoved your money back in. "You still bought me a free drink, so really, who's the loser here? Prick."
[Wanderer] laughed heartily before he pulled out his battered codal, which had underlined texts for provisions he deemed important. There was a momentary softness in his gaze that disappeared in an instant.
But that's the only conversation he planned on having that evening. He did mention he'll drag you out in his study session so you weren't too shocked by it. Instead, you sat and awkwardly people-watched. The world you came from and this one were identical. You got through your old 2009 just fine— it's just that Tatsumi Port Island was not a real location from your original Japan.
Your memories about the video game Persona aren't very clear since you reincarnated in the game, but the red band [Wanderer] wore on his sleeve affirmed that he is the leader of S.E.E.S. It's nice to know that someone like him has the potential to become a leader.
[Wanderer] appeared wholly immersed in his studies.
Maybe he wouldn't notice if you looked around—
…?!
He immediately grabbed your hand. You yelped slightly as you noticed the iron grip he had.
"Where are you going?"
Don't leave him.
He squeezed just a bit more tightly.
"W-What the— I'm just going to the bathroom." You felt a shiver down your spine as you shared his gaze. There's a dull coldness to it you couldn't quite place, as if he had been a witness to injustice, sevenfold.
You quietly sat back down. He still hasn't let go of your hand.
"Good riddance." He muttered.
"If it isn't [Wanderer]!"
You turned around, yanking your hand away.
It's Ryoji.
You stood up, gawking.
"W-Woah, are you okay?" Ryoji asked, hurriedly approaching you. While you were frozen in place, [Wanderer] looked at his empty hand, feeling your warmth escape his fingertips.
G-Good… he's still alive.
You thought [Wanderer] killed him.
[Wanderer] is the wildcard, and that's a terrifying factor to consider. He hasn't shown any interest in humanity. Knowing his past has not increased any hope on your end. Everyone else in his eyes are insignificant insects.
He has the power to end Ryoji.
He has the power to end this world.
Locked and loaded.
Ryoji's eyes softened. "Wait, I think I know a beautiful face like yours from somewhere… You must be [Wanderer]'s attendant, (Y/n), right?"
You blinked.
"Wait, how did you…"
He chuckled, taking and placing a soft kiss on your gloved hands.
"I have my ways." Ryoji winked.
"Don't touch them." [Wanderer] sneered.
Ryoji stood up straight, unfazed by his threatening tone. You took a moment to examine his appearance. He had a lot of white clothing and a big yellow scarf around his neck. Just below his left eye is a mole. On the surface, he appeared quite human, but everyone seated at this table was aware of his true nature.
He is the 13th arcana. The appraiser.
You and [Wanderer] have every right to be wary.
"I'm Ryoji Mochizuki. It's nice to be officially introduced to you, Mx. (Y/n)."
"Ryoji Mochizuki…" You tasted the syllables.
"Oh? Who knew hearing my name from your lips makes it sound so wonderful."
"C-Cut it out, you don't mean that." You said, a little flustered.
[Wanderer]'s gaze fixated on you, stewing in his concoction of envy and misery. His fists were clenched beneath the table, knuckles turning white. With narrowed eyes, he watched as you continued engaging in conversation with Ryoji. His laughter was grating his ears. He couldn't bear the sight of you engaging with another man, especially someone as flirtatious as him.
Ryoji, sensing [Wanderer]'s distress, shot him a casual glance. To top the look, he paired it with a knowing smirk. He made mental notes of the man's clenched jaw and tensed shoulders.
"You seem a little on edge, [Wanderer]. Finals coming up?" He feigned innocence.
"It's December, and I'm not on edge." He scoffed, trying not to make his gritted teeth evident. "Don't you own a calendar? Finals are in March. To think a pea-brain like you managed to transfer to Gekkan…"
"Right, right." Ryoji smiled, closing his eyes. "Then it must be my proposal you're thinking of."
You stiffened; [Wanderer] did not.
"Ryoji—"
"I know, Mx. (Y/n)." He started. "I know you're not too keen on the idea of killing me. My existence is the affirmation of the Fall. None of you— sorry, I forgot (Y/n) is from the Velvet room— I meant none of them will live till Spring… Or perhaps it's more accurate to say they'll forfeit the will to live."
"… I-I'm sorry." Ryoji buried his face in his yellow scarf. There's a certain tremble in his voice that truly emphasizes his sorrow. "Just as all living things die, the flow of time cannot be hindered. But there's comfort in killing me. If you do… you won't have to suffer for the coming days."
If [Wanderer] kills Ryoji, Tartarus, the Dark Hour— the burden of everyone's memories will all disappear.
But [Wanderer] can retain his.
He's not originally from this world after all…
However, should he let him live, the rest of S.E.E.S's life will continue until everyone's inevitable demise.
"Yeah, yeah. Whatever."
[Wanderer] rolled his eyes, diverting his eyes back to his notes. "Everyone will die soon, who cares? I've heard your spiel several times already. You need to get more entertaining material."
"[Wanderer]!" You scolded him.
Your eyes widened in disbelief at [Wanderer]'s unwittingly casual jabs at the apocalypse. You wanted to ask him if he was even listening, but the truth will disappoint you. A cold sweat formed on your brow.
Ryoji's smile crooked into a hopeless one.
"You depend on (Y/n) too much."
[Wanderer] froze. "What did you say…?"
"You have a group of people around you, eager to establish a bond— eager to be friends with you. You have met Junpei, Yukari, Mitsuru, Akihiko, Fuuka, and many others– but you don't consider any of them as your friends." Ryoji shook his head. "Instead, you spend your time with just (Y/n). Never anyone else. Just them. To the point that I think it's unhealthy."
"I don't care for humans." He replied immediately.
"You're human too, [Wanderer]." Ryoji shot back. "You're made of blood, bones, and flesh."
[Wanderer] fell silent. What Ryoji said was true, and yet…
"Am I?" He laughed.
The sound was hollow and mechanical. Deprived of genuine mirth. It did not sound forced, yet his eyes were dull.
Perhaps he lived as a puppet for so long that the idea of being human has yet to reach him.
Ryoji shifted, uncomfortably glancing between you two. The tension was palpable despite the cafe's peaceful ambiance. Ryoji cleared his throat softly.
"I should leave…" He trailed off, voice slightly wavering. His eyes darted around, scrambling for words to say. "But, um, before I leave, I just want to say again that you need to give it some more thought, [Wanderer]... It's a big deal… Just…"
Ryoji sighed. "Remember to make your choice to spare or kill me by December 31st. I'm glad you're having fun but don't get too distracted with (Y/n). I'll be waiting."
That being said, his footsteps reverberated loudly in the otherwise still room as he turned and headed for the door. He dared to turn back as he grabbed for the doorknob and saw you two sharing a look that he couldn't determine if it was one of contemplation or displeasure. He hurried out and the cafe door shut behind him.
"Happy?" [Wanderer] bitterly asked.
You paused for a moment… then grinned.
"Tsk, what are you laughing at, worm?"
"Nothing, nothing!" You shrugged. "I just thought that for a guy with a stick up his ass, you're cute when you're jealous."
That riled [Wanderer] up in an instant.
You do not know the full extent of his envy's filth.
"I am NOT—" He stopped, realizing how counterproductive it would be. "Whatever. I don't care."
"Uhuh?"
"Shut up and finish your damn chocolate!"
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II. Anger.
Before you know it, it's April.
"Seriously, you three, I'm bored as fuck! Can't I just take a stroll outside?" You yelled, waving the heavy persona compendium in the air as your sisters ignored you.
It hasn't been long since you reincarnated, so your right to go outside isn't as liberal. Given the impending threat of an apocalypse, the Velvet Room attendants are especially overprotective.
"(Y/n), dear sibling, watch your mouth! You mustn't let Igor or Nameless hear you speak so vulgarly."
Taking a good look at your new "siblings", you've noticed how almost everyone was present. Margaret sat elegantly on the sofa while Theodore & Elizabeth were doing their best to calm you down. It's almost rare to have all three in one place. The three oldest were busy-bodies who had more eccentric matters they devoted their attention to. Including rapping and dancing, though neither performances are good for your senses.
"If boredom plagues you, then you should try teasing Theodore." Elizabeth yawned. "He's easy pickings."
"Sister!" Theodore pouted. "Shouldn't (Y/n) focus on studying how fusing works? It would be a better use of their time…"
"The day (Y/n)'s new wildcard learns the value of social links might just be the day miserly politicians become generous." Elizabeth shrugged.
You paled, tugging her sleeve. "Oh fuck… Am I screwed?"
She gave you a lopsided smile. "I may be your new sibling but that does not mean I am obliged to resolve your problems, (Y/n). Learn to solve this on your own."
Theodore coughed.
"Please, stop scaring them, sister Elizabeth. It's not their fault this new guest is a cruel arbiter. I fear there will not be a second of groundless joy in store for them…"
"You're not helping me relax either! Motherfucker. Can't you two speak normally?"
"Settle down, all of you."
The four of you stood straight as Igor tilted his chin up. Though you've gotten used to his bloodshot gaze, it had a way of prickling your skin this time around. With his signature smile, he closed his eyes and snapped his fingers.
"Our guest is about to enter."
"W-Wait, RIGHT NOW?!?"
Before you could react, the room transformed into what appeared to be a large elevator. The walls were barred and creaking noises began to subtly make their presence. A floating door materialized, and soon, opened.
Dark purple hair and eyes, short frame, soft face.
"…Hmm?"
You blinked.
"Wait, no way…"
You know him.
Of course, you know him.
"Everyone, meet [Wanderer]."
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You decided that you two should reintroduce yourselves and forget that the past ever happened.
For now, you had been gifted with a vital role: being the protagonist's attendant.
According to your Igor, your role is to assist your guest in fusing personas. He had chosen you specifically in advance as you are his "anima/animus figure". Initially, that job was for Elizabeth. However, your beliefs, your intuition, your emotions— they're in perfect tune with [Wanderer]. Igor expects you to facilitate their spiritual and psychological growth and implore them to interact more with others.
Which, based on that alone, sounds like this puppet just hired an unpaid therapist.
"What do you want?"
"Well…"
Since you became [Wanderer]'s attendant, you've started to have thicker skin. He will always make his crankiness known each visit. You're slightly grateful for it, for how else would you know patience otherwise? Though his personality rubs you the wrong way, his strength does have merits you cannot ignore. Even Belladona, the Velvet Room's devout singer, had sung praises for his mettle. There was one line that struck you about her song, something about him being like a puppet with a beating heart unbeknownst to himself…
Which is why you thought you might as well try to see if you could convince him to take you out sometimes.
"What, like a date?" [Wanderer] scoffed then smirked, a light blush on his face. "Are you really that desperate?"
"No, eww—" You rolled your eyes. "I meant it literally. Igor and the others wouldn't let me go outside unless I'm with someone they trust."
He looked away and covered his mouth, his shoulders trembling slightly.
"Like a child?"
"Yeah, yeah, shut the fuck up." You deadpanned, your pride slightly chipped. "Like a child or whatever you want to see it, as long as it gets me out of here. I just want to see the world before it all…"
You paused.
Better not to bring it up. You're not sure if Igor told him yet.
[Wanderer] raised an eyebrow. "What's in it for me?"
You shrugged. "Is money not enough?"
He paused.
"You've got to be kidding me— Fine, what else do you want?"
His eyelids lowered, hissing slightly. "Evil expects evil from others, huh? I wasn't trying to think of anything more, but now that I think about it…"
"Oh, great."
"… I can take your request," he pointed at you. "But only if you join me in the library. Anywhere else, especially loud places like clubs, I'll send your ass back."
That's a no-brainer.
"Deal!"
Though you've missed the peculiar sight, [Wanderer] had a small smile on his face as you shook hands. The two of you had become nearly inseparable since then.
Worryingly, he's closer to you than other humans.
The only relationship he needed was with you.
And with what little time this world has left, you hope you could have a last cup of coffee with him…
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I. Denial.
Your reality crumbled. What a START.
Your family, friends... all gone. No one was left. You convince yourself you "deserved" this punishment for smoking a life away with dreadful workloads, no matter how untrue it was. When the world burnt down, you were sent into a darkness you had not known before.
The person in charge of your reincarnation process told you that for the next few minutes, you and a selected companion will see your lives flash before your eyes in a void— and it will not necessarily be a comforting sight.
But you woke up relaxed. In an abyss filled with broken mirrors meant to depict your character to pieces, you donned a plain expression. There was not an inch of you that grieved for what was lost. Similarly, you had no care for how you were being transmigrated to another realm. Though you had grown accustomed to this isolation, humanity always struggled with silence. There was ringing on your fingers. When you unclasped your hands, you saw a pointed shard. Curiously, you clenched it. But no matter the tightness of your grip, no blood came out.
Your breath fogged up the glass. You wondered why that Memokeeper told you that you deserve to live on. You thought your life was rather unremarkable.
Makes sense. You thought to yourself. I'd rather pride myself on a boring life with integrity than an ambitious yet fraudulent one.
「Assignments. Commute. Study. Review. Assignments. Commute. Study. Review. Was that all your life was...? Then tell me, little (Y/n), why does the mirror in front of you appear distorted?」
And so, you gazed forward. Your reflection stood tall, larger than your life, and it beckoned you to come closer. This "(Y/n) (L/n)" had the opposite of a Cheshire grin- perhaps a caricature- perhaps an accurate depiction. Wearied of yourself and wearied of the sycophantic students around you. How unhappy are you to see yourself as someone like this? Are these the emotions you wish to be preserved? Is this the memory you want your world to be remembered by?
「These memories must be corrupted. Someone must be tampering with them. I do not think you lived a miserable life.」
I can't answer your questions either. But I think that reflection is who I am, because sometimes...
"I wish I had never been born at all."
Your lips were parted, but no sound came out. You resonated with those words, but they did not come from you. The voice was dark, hopeless, and alone.
When you were being sent off, you thought no one was around to greet you. There was another man. He had short hair and purple eyes- an incredibly rare sight in your world. This man seemed to be gazing at his reflection as well. You needn't know how he saw himself. The emptiness in his eyes did not differ from yours. He, too, was masking isolation as independence with an intense fragility. The dread he inflicted upon you was the closest you've ever gotten to facing your own perceived "weakness".
His memories were a mixbag. Some were filled with domestic bliss, but the anger in his heart triumphed more. He had friends but thought himself betrayed. His heart was constructed through a system of evasions, and he was a specialist in self-deception. This man knew little of emotions but had an abundance of it. It's no wonder he refused to sacrifice the artistry of his vengeance against humanity. You can sympathize with how he could not attach himself to those around him. He was burdened with malicious knowledge. Fakes. Lies. Insincerities. A class of his own.
However, he had a sin you cannot empathize with. A trait you can read that you're certain he had never noticed about himself.
He was a sickeningly beautiful man with a peculiar innocence.
He looked like a man who truly did not live in the real world.
This man did not feel real to you. He felt made-up. Fictional. His aura of flawlessness appalled you. Though you shared the same sentiments, you thought him dimensionless.
Yet this is supposedly your first meeting.
「Is it? Where have you seen him before? Can't you remember, dear (Y/n)?」
No. No, I can't.
「... What a shame. Worry no more, little (Y/n). Close your eyes. When you wake up, you will meet your new reality— new realm— new family.」
You nodded and agreed to a higher existence you did not believe in. Unlike others, you were a little bit more incapable of trusting a living soul. But there's no other choice.
Life is ordinarily far from anyone's control in the first place. Why bother fighting? If following can make her fuck off, it doesn't matter.
Nothing matters.
Wait…
Is that…
Scaramouche?
Before you closed your eyes and accepted your fate, you could've sworn...
He looked at you with a crooked grin.
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「Thou art I... And I am thou...
Thou hast established a new bond...
Thou shalt be blessed when creating
Personas of the Universe Arcana..."」
"Hmm. Strange… Is that truly the order of the story?"
A woman stared at you.
Not (Y/n) (L/n).
YOU.
BEHIND.
THE.
SCREEN.
She smiled wryly.
Hate might empower you for a short while, but it comes at the cost of consuming you whole. Should a shard or any surface reflect [Wanderer]'s face, he would understand what he had become. However, it's too late. He had made his choice and stomped away any remorse he could have. When all is said and done, he alone will spread the ashes. He alone will stand. A blank slate.
[Wanderer] spent his life looking for scapegoats and ended up removing his responsibility.
Betrayals?
What a sad, sad puppet.
What a poor excuse to justify an entire apocalypse.
A poor excuse of a man.
"THE ARCANA IS THE MEANS BY WHICH ALL IS REVEALED." She muttered softly. "And you have been reading your story in REVERSE. Perhaps this is the only way this world can attain SALVATION. The chronological order is not a slice of life. You did not have a disagreement and decided to start your relationship over again. Life is far more WICKED."
"Read it again, but from DENIAL to ACCEPTANCE. The proper way to GRIEVE DEATH."
With great reluctance, she took the five cards laid on the table and placed them in an upright position.
"Let's see if you'd rather ACCEPT the truth or live in DENIAL."
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Mixed-Kester can now message Wanderer [prior to 12/31/2009]
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kaleidos-copia · 4 months ago
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Behold: The Cardinal in medieval illuminated manuscript style 📜🖌️
(might wanna turn your brightness up a little)
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scudden · 1 year ago
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Jon Snow :) Wanted to make a portrait with him with a medieval manuscript style border!!
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curioscurio · 5 months ago
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my favorite part of the Voynich Manuscript is this little nymph bathing in a pitcher plant and making a rainbow with the water spray
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wavesoutbeingtossed · 7 months ago
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Many of the songs on TTPD are about both one muse and all the muses because the through line is that they all hurt her in very specific ways. The All Too Well of it all of The Manuscript is the original sin, the first act that broke her by someone she loved*. Once you finish the album with The Manuscript, it reframes the rest of the album, because you realize that first betrayal of her trust and her faith has informed the way she’s moved through life since — and why the lines between these muses/situations are so blurry. Because the actions are specific to people, but the betrayal and the outcomes are rote; they repeat themselves over and over in different places and times. It’d almost be funny how completely predictable these men are if it weren’t so utterly devastating and earth shattering.
The story of The Manuscript hangs like a spectre throughout the entire album, illuminating why the things she felt and wanted were so painful to lose beyond the obvious, and why she felt like she had to keep settling or hurting herself in the aftermath. So TTPD is about each of them and all of them and they cannot be disentangled. What a tangled web we weave indeed.
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friendamedes · 1 month ago
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submitted my first ever manuscript to a literary agent a couple months ago and got my first ever rejection today!! this is so huge for me
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cuties-in-codices · 1 year ago
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Where do you find these manuscripts? Is it like a website or do you find it randomly??
hey, thanks for the curiosity! lenghty answer below the cut :)
1)
medieval manuscripts are typically owned by libraries and showcased on the library's websites. so one thing i do is i randomly browse those digitized manuscript collections (like the collections of the bavarian state library or the bodleian libraries, to name just two), which everybody can do for free without any special access. some digital collections provide more useful tools than others (like search functions, filters, annotations on each manuscript). if they don't, the process of wading through numerous non-illustrated manuscripts before i find an illustrated one at all can be quite tedious.
2)
there are databases which help to navigate the vast sea of manuscripts. the one i couldn't live without personally use the most is called KdIH (Katalog der deutschsprachigen illustrierten Handschriften des Mittelalters). it's a project which aims to list all illustrated medieval manuscripts written in german dialects. the KdIH provides descriptions of the contents of each manuscript (with a focus on the illustrations), and if there's a digital reproduction of a manuscript available anywhere, the KdIH usually links to it. the KdIH is an invaluable tool for me because of its focus on illustrated manuscripts, because of the informations it provides for each manuscript, and because of its useful search function (once you've gotten over the initial confusion of how to navigate the website). the downside is that it includes only german manuscripts, which is one of the main reasons for the over-representation of german manuscripts on my blog (sorry about that).
3)
another important database for german manuscripts in general (i.e. not just illustrated ones) is the handschriftencensus, which catalogues information regarding the entirety of german language manuscripts of the middle ages, and also links to the digital reproductions of each manuscript.
4)
then there are simply considerable snowball effects. if you do even just superficial research on any medieval topic at all (say, if you open the wikipedia article on alchemy), you will inevitably stumble upon mentions of specific illustrated manuscripts. the next step is to simply search for a digital copy of the manuscript in question (this part can sometimes be easier said than done, especially when you're coming from wikipedia). one thing to keep in mind is that a manuscript illustration seldom comes alone - so every hint to any illustration at all is a greatly valuable one (if you do what i do lol). there's always gonna be something interesting in any given illustrated manuscript. (sidenote: one very effective 'cheat code' would be to simply go through all manuscripts that other online hobbyist archivers of manuscript illustrations have gone through before - like @discardingimages on tumblr - but some kind of 'professional pride' detains me from doing so. that's just a kind of stubbornness though. like, i want to find my material more or less on my own, not just the images but also the manuscripts, and i apply arbitrary rules to my search as to what exactly that means.)
5)
whatever tool or strategy i use to find specific illustrated manuscripts-- in the end, one unavoidable step is to actually manually skim through the (digitized) manuscript. i usually have at least a quick look at every single illustrated page, and i download or screenshot everything that is interesting to me. this process can take up to an hour per manuscript.
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in conclusion, i'd say that finding cool illuminated manuscripts is much simpler than i would have thought before i started this blog. there are so many of them out there and they're basically just 'hidden in plain side', it's really astounding. finding the manuscripts doesn't require special skills, just some basic experience with/knowledge of the tools available. the reason i'm able to post interesting images almost daily is just that i spend a lot of time doing all of this, going through manuscripts, curating this blog, etc. i find a lot of comfort in it, i learn a lot along the way, and i immensely enjoy people's engagement with my posts. so that's that :)
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uncleardyn · 2 months ago
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(alan wake-gravity falls crossover) man i love that character. you know, the deeply paranoid author who made a pact with a dark entity that ultimately ended with him stranded in another dimension separated from his loved ones for years at a time? takes place in the pacific northwest? has twin imagery associated with him and a reoccurring specific piece of symbology related to the unfortunate situation they're in? doesn't ever explain the reasoning behind his actions and instead just kinda goes "bro trust me"? yeah he also wears an outer layer of clothing with elbow pads on it, that one.
#my art#stanford pines#alan wake (the man)#ford pines#gravity falls#alan wake#remedyverse#SAtT au#i am. normal about the crossovers i make up.#what do you mean the esoteric weird horror game about stories and the disney cartoon about family dont have a shared audience. sounds fake.#anyways the comic on the right is in honor of a joke i had to scrap in my fic wip due to a perspective switch.#rip that joke i thought you were pretty funny. i like the idea of alan critiquing his own manuscript pages upon the events happening.#oh i should probably do a warning since theres that crunchy image of the aw2 alan death screen huh. uh#blood#aw2 alan death screen my beloved. literally made me go ''oh god'' out loud in shock and horror when i first saw it#anyways did you know theres an au to this objectively already an au crossover. i call it ''bill cipher gets sent to the shadow realm''#bill doesn't show up a lot in this au he gets one scene where he taunts ford abt alan being a danger#with the implication that the dark place/presence genuinely freaks him out. but in this self indulgence of a self indulgence#alan essentially manages to trick bill into swapping places with him and bill ends up trapped in the writers room/the dark place.#lmao get yötön yö'd idiot. YOU are aleksi kesä now.#also i like the idea of zane and bill meeting as well as door and bill meeting. i think they might scare bill a little bit.#just like how zane scares me <3 what a cool character what the fuck is his deal#also you may be wondering why alans in his aw2 look and not aw or awan look despite the fact that lines up closer#to when gravity falls happens-ish. well the answer to that is 1: the crossover uses a lot of the elements from aw2#and 2: i like alans long hair and suit and beard. i like the pathetic sopping look when his hair is in his face
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arctic-hands · 6 months ago
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You ever be totally immersed in a story and then you come across a line about a subject and you realize you know more about this subject than the author and what the author wrote down was completely wrong and it's not even that the author didn't do research so much as the author didn't even think this was something that even needed to be researched? And it drives you absolute cuckoo bananas?
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dreamofcamelot · 2 months ago
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what do you mean this is a fan art I made while in the dentist waiting room and not a real piece one of their servants made on a parchment back in the 12th century
(meme under the cut)
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brynn-lear · 7 months ago
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A Tasteless Cup [Yandere!Joker/Reader]
Prompt: After the destruction of your previous reality, you and Akira Kurusu landed in Teyvat. In an effort to stay afloat, Akira had set up a book café in Mondstadt alongside you. However, is this the true flavor of "Freedom"? [Dedicated to: Riley H. Goodheart, for the Alone Together event]
CW: yandere themes, dubious food, manipulation/controlling behavior, toxic relationship dynamic. P.S: Akira is aged up [20s] in this fic, happens after Persona 5.
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To Akira, those he lets into his heart will become an intrinsic part of him. They are more than a trick of a card, more than a mask to mimic and steal for his own, more than a numbers game. Every bit of them is his soul. His relationships are the culmination of his being and, eventually, his raison d'etre. 
And Akira Kurusu had a hard time coping with losing these links. 
To others, relationships are no different from chains. The surrounding people are less a home and more like bars to a cage— a prison. And despite being somewhat of a Mr/Ms. Congeniality, you aren't as affected by the fact that neither of you can return to your respective world.
You are both empty. You have been handed a clean slate, an empty card, and an empty vision.
You are both "fools" again.      
"Bit too early in the morning to start a serious discussion…" Akira tiredly muttered, removing his glasses before rubbing his eyes.
But as long as the sun rises once more, does a rebirth truly matter?
Anyone would be remiss to disregard the sheer jadedness in his eyes and the slight breathlessness of his speech. Akira poured himself a cup. Normally served to others rather than his indulgence, you quietly noticed that his cup lacked sugar. The cafe owner drank and embraced its bitterness, unflinching. 
It's been three months since you both arrived in the world of Teyvat. Getting by as an Outlander proved difficult, and thankfully, Akira is kind towards you and a jack-of-all-trades. One might say he has "maxed out his stats." Charismatic, skilled, and bold, he has the makings for an entrepreneur with a pyro vision to boot. Unsurprisingly, he had become one of old Mond's eligible bachelors in a short time frame. 
So, by just the third week, he managed to persuade Master Ragnvindr with a solid pitch. The cafe you both sit in is a testament to your shared hard work. With his brew proficiency and your hobby of accumulating knowledge through books and art pieces, the cozy place had become a second home for individuals such as the local librarian and the Guild's investigator. 
But you'll always remember his words the night before he was invited into Duke Ragnvindr's study room.
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"Akira, are you sure about this?" You muttered, tugging his sleeve. "Once you finalize it, you can't just..."
"Hmm? Why are you hesitating?" He tilted his chin up slightly, confused. "It's a good way to keep our finances afloat, right? Don't you want to keep collecting books and art supplies? I thought you said you wanted to have a small library someday."
"But, for you to work this much for it-"
"You matter to me. You are the only thing left binding me down here in Teyvat." He casually shot you down, but his light tone could not erase the heaviness of his words. "Besides..."
"Don't you like it when I make a hot cup and fresh pastries just for you?" 
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That dream materialized into something called Cafe LeBlanc. Though he claims the name wasn't his but a charming, cranky old man's— you doubt anyone else can come up with that. But he sounded genuine enough. His unexplainable "silent" face can sometimes make him a hard read.
… This isn't one of those times. You know what's troubling him quite well. 
"Yeah…" you muttered. "Can't we save this conversation for the end of the day instead?"
Akira laughed. 
"Smart," he hummed humorlessly. 
"You know I get too tired to do anything at night except washing dishes and doing crosswords. It's not happening. We'll have this talk now."
Fair enough. Avoiding one's problems is a mindset you never advocated. You'd be a terrible hypocrite if you start now. "Alright, I'll hear you out."
You shifted from your seat, dragging it closer to the counter. Akira downed his cup on the other side, revealing no liquid gold in its bottom. His eyes were wide awake thanks to the caffeine, yet you couldn't even glance upward. 
"(Y/n), do you remember how I got this pyro vision?"
You blinked, unsure how he'd make the fact relevant. Still, you nodded.
A long time ago, you liked how open Akira was about himself. You can tell he had immense trust issues he had worked on fixing. Akira is a good man. Being wrongfully expelled and imprisoned at a young age must've done damages you can't quite comprehend fully. Sometimes, you wish you had the courage to be just as vulnerable, too.
He traced the outline of a pyro symbol on the table with his slender finger collecting not a single dust nor stain. Despite the warmth his vision may hold, it did not detract from the cold atmosphere you both had to face. With the angle you were viewing him, you can't help but notice his eyelashes. They're prettier than yours, you thought. If only his glare wasn't so pointed.
"When I arrived in this world, I was alone and confused. But you? You weren't. I saw your face— the face of someone who had nothing to lose to begin with."
Akira's gaze softened. He was right. You adapted to this new world so suspiciously well. 
"I couldn't tell whether you saw our situation as a positive or whether you thought this whole transfer to another reality was a cruel joke. But I had a feeling you were as horrified as I was. That you couldn't bear the thought of living alone. I think that you also had friends you cared for, but now, you will never be able to hear their voices again."
He breathed in shakily, his eyes heavy. Akira may seem like a silent person, no different from Duke Ragnvindr, but the time you spent together backs up what your instincts are testifying right this second.
There's one true thought in his mind.
After all his efforts.
After all that he has gone through so that you'll stay by his side.
What was it all for?
"So, when a Lawachurl wounded you in Windrise, I stepped in. I can't help but project myself onto you. I thought about how you must also have friends waiting– family waiting– whether it's a cat or a sister— I knew I just had to. I had to risk everything, even if you were just a stranger to me then." He clenched his fists. "And you were worth it. You were absolutely worth every risk. You were worth everything. I knew I had to survive, if not for myself, but to help you."
"Even without some sort of— card– or whatever— to indicate it, I knew our relationship was progressing. That our understanding of each other has reached such high ranks. I know we had become each other's most trusted confidant, so why? Listen, I value freedom too, but—"
He slammed his cup down— you jolted as you heard it chip slightly. It wasn't his intent to scare. Akira would never wish to frighten you. But he can't stop his emotions and movements from being brash and pointed. 
"... Why did you want to quit working with me?"
There it goes.
"Is it because I haven't spent much time with you lately? You know I've been busy with trying to invest in a better flat—"
The pace of his breathing was starting to quicken.
"Kurusu, it's not that…" You need to rationalize this with him. Fast.
"I-Is it because work has been too much? I told you we could hire someone if you feel too faint for the job. I care about your health— hell— maybe even more than you do—"
"Akira, listen to me—"
His futile attempt to maintain control was like an age-weakened thread. The fibers of his composure whittled away string by string, itching to snap entirely. Akira's jaw clenched. 
The manacle may not be anchoring his feet down as it did in the Velvet Room, but there's no denying that doubt is tugging and clawing at his neck. He knew that if he should continue, only strained words would come from his coffee-bitter lips. 
He rubbed his head against his shoulder. He had to have been wiping a tear away, trying to make it unnoticeable but failing.
"But why are you LEAVING m—"
"Behold, for this fine hour, you are not only graced with the presence of soft rays— you are also blessed by myself: Fischl, the Prinzessin der Verurteilung!"
"Mein Fräulein meant to say good morning to you both, Arsene and Sholmes."
... Akira chuckled a short and strained sound that could easily be missed by a weak ear.
As though a switch had been flipped, Akira's contorted expression turned back to his customer service smile. You trembled slightly. Perhaps it's a skill he mastered during his part-time worker years in high school, but he seemed a little too good at hiding such overwhelming frustrations— almost shape-shifting.
It's… 
Eerie.
He's smiling. It's his usual smile he has that has a calm allure and a hint of cockiness.
As if nothing happened five seconds ago.
"Ah, greetings, Your Highness!"
The guests were none other than some of the regulars, Amy and her bird familiar. This blonde, eye-patched girl is the only person in Little Mond who consistently makes Akira act dramatic. 
He bowed, not missing a beat of young Amy's theatrics. After spending so many years chatting with Yusuke, he's gotten used to bouncing back conversations of this nature. Akira enjoys the young investigator's company. He saw tiny bits of his friend in her.
"What shall we, humble servants, offer you this dawn? Will it be your usual order, or does our dear royal have something else in mind entirely? We will do our best to provide you with maximum entertainment! After all, this is your castle, Mein Fräulein."
You stiffened.
We.
He's not letting you go just yet. You caught a glimpse of his dark pupils, slightly moving to meet yours. Imploring you without words to act out of his best interest.
Akira Kurusu has always been a witty man, but there is no way there's no anger beneath that mask.
"Are you alright, Sholmes?" Oz asked.
For whatever reason, Akira persuaded Amy to call you both Arsene Lupin and Herlock Sholmes. The former was likely a nod to his first persona's name. His explanation for the latter was something along the lines of "you strike me as the type who always wants to search for your truth."
You blinked.
Right. You're his version of Sherlock Holmes.
Ha.
Even here, he gets to dictate everything about you.
"... Yes, Your Highness, to what do I owe the pleasure?" you said. The blonde girl smiled and tilted her head up pompously. 
"What other brew could I possibly order but the darkest taste that leaves any normal mortal to shrivel in imagination?" Amy shrugged, her eyebrow raised as though everyone knew what she babbled on with commendable sass. Her aviator companion thankfully cleared the air— albeit a little too blunt.
"Mein Fräulein desires a cinnamon ginger affogato with more sugar than last time, please. Two spoons for the poor Mein Fräulein."
"O-Oz!?!"
It's easily one of the least bitter cups on the menu. It consists of vanilla gelato, a tablespoon of espresso powder, cinnamon sticks, hazelnut liqueur, and bits of dried sunsettia. I can't say what would make anyone fear such a thing except for those with complications. Someone else shared the same sentiment.
You and Akira laughed in unison.
Your eyes widened in astonishment. That was in sync. You immediately looked away as Akira busied himself with Amy's order. It was awkward knowing that even with your efforts to cut things off, there was still some vague commonality between you two.
"... Say, your Highness?" Akira smiled softly. "Would it be alright for me to probe some of your most revered royal musings?"
...
...
... What is his play this time?
"You have my ears, dear subject."
"Suppose there is a princess who is facing an uphill battle. Furthermore, her valiant knight aspires to rescue her. However, the princess, for unknown reasons, declines his assistance. Is that..." He shut his eyes, laughing that strained chuckle once more. "... equittable?"
"Oh, most grievous indeed! A knight, who is obligated by the code of chivalry, shall always respond to the plea of his princess when she is in peril. His solemn obligation is to protect her honor and safeguard her from any danger!"
Akira looked at you.
His eyes were cold.
"But what if the princess doesn't want to be saved? What if she believes she can handle the situation herself, or maybe she thinks having assistance would make her weak?"
"Ah, but thou dost speak in riddles!" Amy scoffed, unamused. "A princess may exhibit abundant power and courage, yet it is the responsibility of her faithful knight to guarantee her safety, especially when she questions her own necessity. For what good is a knight's valor if not to serve and protect his liege?"
"Would you say her actions essentially strip him of his purpose?"
"Why, of course!" Amy replied with full conviction. "One would not require Oz if he lacks such a necessary trait! It is the basis of our trust– our relationship! A true knight's honor lies not in the glory of battle, but in his unwavering commitment to his princess, even in the face of her refusal."
You sucked in a deep breath.
Akira, you—!
"Speak frankly. Do these inquiries pertain to me?" Amy glared at him. Akira shook his head immediately, umping up his flamboyant voice inflections.
No.
It's about you.
It's always about you when it comes to him.
"Of course not!" Akira feigned worry. "It was for a novel I'm writing— to honor one's love."
… To honor one's "love".
Love? You froze. He calls this relationship love? It hadn't been that for the past few months! Love is meant to be like coming home to a comforting home— not a cold palace with your unfeeling statue at the heart of it all.  
You were hoping that your life would be dictated by what you want it to mean this time around. You hope to create your own purpose, your own identity. You hope to reject his titles—being his partner and his "Sholmes." 
But mostly, you sincerely hoped his words were untrue and did not allude to something as sinister and self-destructive as his love.
Besides, you already have a lover waiting for you to leave this mess behind.
You and he already have everything planned out. A rented flat, food, work— everything is set. The only box to tick off was leaving itself, and then you'll be in your lover's arms.
But you swore.
You swore you just saw him smirk.
"(Y/n), could you please lend me a hand? Can you pass the cinnamon sticks from the cupboard?"
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Starting your day by serving Amy leads to serving a hundred more. You can't just stand up and leave whenever someone asks for your service. It's impossible to make the shortest comment about how you no longer work for LeBlanc, even more so when people beg for book recommendations. Being friendly is part of who you are. It can't be helped.
What made matters worse was that people were ordering seconds. Apparently, Akira must've adjusted all the recipes on the menu because whatever was added to those cups made it all the more divine. You knew his skills were perfection, but to think he could even exceed that...
In the end, despite multiple delays, Akira still got you right where he wanted you.
"Thank you. Please come again!" He escorted the final customer outside and flipped the closing sign himself.
Now, it was just the two of you left.
"... You must be tired." You offered, hoping he wouldn't catch on. "It's been a long day, why don't you take a rest—"
"Nice try." 
Well, it was worth a shot.
You stiffly waited for him to say something. Anything. But instead, he took a kettle off the icebox and heated the stove with his vision. 
"Back to my story, do you remember where we left off?"
The wisest thing to have down was biting your tongue or pretending not to know what he was talking about. Unfortunately, your answer was immediate.
"Something about how you got your vision?"
"Ah, yes, that." Akira laughed. "Say, I told you about how I used to be the leader of the Phantom Thieves when I was in High School, right?"
While waiting, Akira tapped his fingers against the table but stopped when he realized you were becoming distracted. Snapping out of it, you cleared your throat.
"You were stealing hearts in the Metaverse, yes, I recall..." You mumbled. Due to the sudden need to speak, you ended up unwittingly playing by his script again. "You manifested a Persona and used that to reform the heart of rotten adults."
You flinched slightly when his tea was starting to release thin smokes. It smelled too much like rust. Maybe he exhausted it too much today. The customers you had were double the amount. You had to commend his willpower for still managing exceed his usual sleep schedule.
"Isn't the kettle burning?"
"Trust me, it's not," he answered nonchalantly. "I remember when I told my story to you, you were mostly understanding of our actions. You didn't judge us. Rather, you told me that humanity is selfish and destructive."
"But back to how I got my vision," he finally turned the stove off. "I genuinely thought my most distinct trait was my appreciation for Freedom."
"Yet you got a pyro vision." You joked lightly.
He didn't laugh. Instead, he nodded.
"Strange, isn't it?" Akira tilted his head to look at you for a bit, before back at the hot cup he was pouring. It's the same liquid he's been adding the entire day. This must be the last of those ten pints. "Here, try it."
You slowly took it. It's still a bit too warm, so you continued talking.
"I thought about it, too. If we go by theories, it will make more sense if Barbatos blessed me instead. But with you here..." Akira laughed. "Pyro is definitely my element. I'm seeing a pattern with vision-wielders like me. Based on what I've seen so far, pyro users are often the most passionate. And passion can put a leash on freedom when need be."
You took a sip.
He put an elbow on the table and propped his chin on his palm.
"How is it?"
"It's... tasteless?" You blinked. 
You thought he must've added something grand to the cups today. Was it all just one big placebo effect?
"Makes it no different than regular water, huh?"
"Well, yeah, I guess?"
"I've actually been disposing of this the entire day, that's why the coffees looked darker. Diluting the original sample is hard work but worth it. Enough as a substitute for normal water in case we run out. Who knew you could empty 10 pints so quickly in a day..." 
"You. In case you run out." You sighed, finally addressing it. "Akira, I'm no longer your partner."
"So is he."
You both paused.
He returned the kettle to the ice box before unmasking its contents.
"You were near-fatally wounded once before. You tasted it in your mouth when I defended you from that Lawachurl-
"You should know by now that blood isn't supposed to be tasteless."
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Riley H. Goodheart can now message Akira Kurusu
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coquelicoq · 13 days ago
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for the record high teen boogie (1982) is not natori's favorite movie, but it is the only movie matoba ever successfully dragged him to see in high school. therefore matoba assumes it's his favorite movie.
BONUS: live teen reaction
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