#first he yells at jack for his bad driving and nearly sending them into the ocean
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benevolenterrancy · 2 years ago
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Not all SUV features function as intended... "Intentionally Drove Into The Ocean" is going to be a hard one to claim insurance for
(from "The Sin Eaters" audio)
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johnconstantinejld · 1 year ago
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Gotham Tales-The Bat
The Joker was a master manipulator and had the GCPD and myself looking in the wrong direction one last time. Arthur ‘Dodger’ Dreggs, one of his lackeys had been tasked to distract us by sending them to the Axis Chemical Plant. We found him with Wally Gillespie and Hugh Paine. All minor criminals before meeting the joker, charges of theft, breaking and entering and common assault for each of them. Gillespie also had charges of dangerous driving occasioning death and fleeing the scene of an accident. We found the chemical plant secure, no sign that the Joker had fallen in the chemicals as Harley Quinn had said.
Both men had been infected with joker poison, but we heard the common name ‘Gwynplaine’.
Total time to identify source of name, 4.59 minutes. Must upgrade speed of wrist computer.
The names should have tipped me off. G-P-W plus Hugh means Gwnplaine from Hugo’s 
The Man Who Laughs. Injected Dreggs with a temporary cure. Was unable to save other two. Current joker cure only lowers stress, thus preventing venom from spreading; I am unable to stop someone already stressing. Location was Gotham Cathedral. A man had requested a wedding tonight. His name was Jack Napier, and wife was Gwen Plaine. 
Arrived on the scene on time. Minister Black, defrocked for seven years, was the celebrant. Harley was in white. She had purchased it during her last release. That should have told me. Minister Black was wearing a Joker grin. Trust the Joker to tell another fake story on his final night. We check briefly on Arkham through Nightwing-Punchline secured and taking therapy.
‘I didn’t invite any guests! Nevertheless, you’re just in time for the cake cutting. And then you can see the couple have their first dance.’
‘I thought something funny!’ She said, ‘Something with bounce.’
‘No, boo, we agreed for something subtle. Well, I agreed. Plenty of bounce later on.’
‘Not a good sign-arguing on the wedding.’ Batgirl.
‘Shut up, Red! Don’t be broken again!’ He screams.
‘Another bad sign. Yelling on the wedding day.’
‘He’s right, puddin’.’ 
‘Shut up and cut the cake. Red cherry velvet. It’s official, Bats. Just a man and his sweet, always fresh out of college boo.’
‘But I’m twenty-six, Mistah J.’
‘And you’ll always be my sweet little sixteen.’
‘And he likes underage girls.’ Batgirl again. Slight wretch.
They each hold the butcher knife and lean forward. And he does it. He pushes her face into the cake. Then she acts. Something triggered. She turns and slashes his throat. 
All the nights I’ve had that desire to do that.
All the criminals who have nearly done that and I have prevented them from doing it.
All the people he has manipulated and broken. All the lives ruined.
For once, this was a punchline he did not see coming. The joke was on him.
Joker did not laugh.
Harley finishes it by stabbing him through the heart before we can hold her. Batgirl said she was crying.
She’s still there, in Arkham. Without any Joker to influence her, even Punchline was slowly coming round, but Harley isn’t moving. She’s in her wedding dress, a rotting bouquet of flowers like Miss Havisham. Harley is silent, only letting go of the flowers for basic bodily needs (eat, drink, sleep etc). Others leave her alone. Penguin sends literature, never read. Poison Ivy is incapable of getting through to her and is thus unable to help. She sits there in her cell, or in chapel, her face that of one who has been a victim of abuse, a real monster in our world. 
Another Gotham Tale, don't own rights
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ssahotchhner · 4 years ago
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angel of spite
hi, i wrote a quick little something about the reader intentionally making hotch jealous as revenge. i hope you like it (: i'll be working on a few requests in my inbox next. i also finally made a masterlist which i'll link below!
masterlist
questions, comments, concerns
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You supposed you should have known better than to spite Aaron for staying at the office too late, again. You had simply texted him that since he was going to be working late to not expect you to be there when he got home. Maybe that had been unfair to him, and you were normally so patient with his work schedule, but the last three nights in a row he had promised to be home for date night and continually cancelled last minute. Tonight, you had gotten angry when he texted you yet again, apologizing and saying he would be back late.
He tried calling you over an hour after you had sent the text message, having just then seen it in the throws of a difficult case, but you didn’t pick up. He tries to push down the flare of annoyance he feels, after all, this was the third time he had flaked on you. But still, you were acting like a child. He also knew part of the reason you were doing this was because you knew it would piss him off.
All he wanted at the end of a hard day was to see you waiting in bed for him with open arms. He put on a big show of being the dominant one in the relationship, but both of you knew Aaron became putty in your hands when you gently scratched at his scalp and whispered sweet nothings in his ear. You purposely took that away from him, knowing it was one of the only things that could get him through a tough work day. The more he sat at his desk trying to work, constantly checking his phone to see if you’d called or texted again (you hadn’t) the more angry he became. In fact, he stormed out of the BAU without saying goodbye to anyone without finishing his report.
He called you over and over again until you started sending him straight to voicemail. And so by the time he’s able to make an educated guess about what bar you’re in, his rage ripples off him in waves. He flashes his FBI badge to the bouncer to get inside without waiting in line, something he’s definitely not supposed to do, and heads up the elevator to the rooftop. Once up there, he heads straight to the bar. He scans the room quickly, but you’re nowhere to be found. Until, across the room, sparkling golden crescent moons dangled from someone’s ear. Aaron knew those earrings, he had bought them for you for your birthday this year. And standing in front of you is a broad, tall man. Not as tall as Aaron, but he was built a bit wider than Aaron, as if to make up for it. You sit on the arm of the couch, you look relaxed, your legs open just enough to get the man that was in front you salivating.
When your eyes settled on him, you couldn’t help the cocky smile that lit up your mouth. Unbridled fury filled his face when he saw the lawyer in front of you that was clearly wondering what you’d let him do to you in bed. You sigh as Aaron begins walking over you and turn to look at the lawyer, “I’m really sorry about this.” You say, cutting off whatever he was saying.
He frowns at you, “What?”
But Aaron was here now, “Hi baby,” You say sweetly, “I didn’t think you were going to make it tonight.”
He gives you a withering look as if to say I’ll deal with you later, before turning to the lawyer. “This is Ronnie, he’s a lawyer.”
Ronnie stared from Aaron, who was still silent, to you and back again. “And… who is this?” He refers to Aaron.
You open your mouth, but Aaron speaks first, “Supervisory Special Agent Aaron Hotchner, Unit Chief of the BAU. I’m also her boyfriend.” He gives the lawyer a look that anyone in opposition to the unit chief had experienced many times over the course of his career.
I’m sorry, you were mouthing to Ronnie from behind Aaron’s shoulder. “She didn’t mention a boyfriend.” Ronnie says.
You sigh, leave it to you to pick the one guy in this room that would decide to challenge Aaron Hotchner rather than just apologizing and walking away, “Oh, you idiot.” You murmur.
Aaron tilts his head to the side in an almost predatory way, “Are you suggesting that I’m lying?”
“I’m suggesting that the lady obviously doesn’t want you since she didn’t mention you, Mister FBI.”
“Oh, God help us.” You shake your head and say into your lap and the next time you look up Aaron’s fist has connected with the man’s face and whiskey had splashed on the floor and your ankles. At that your eyes widen, “Aaron, what the fuck?” Aaron had given many men that flirted with you a firm talking to, sometimes escalated to yelling, but never in the entire time that you’d known him had Aaron physically hurt anyone who had advanced on you.
Aaron puts a firm hand on your wrist as a commotion begins to gather around the two of you and pulls you away. He doesn’t speak as he practically drags you out to the back door, down several flights of stairs and out another door behind the building. Once the cold night air hits you, you pull your wrist away from him, “What the hell did you do that for?”
“Did you want him to fuck you?” He practically growls.
“No,” You say, exasperated, “Aaron, we play this game all the time, you’ve never hit someone.”
“You’ve never deliberately gone out of your way to flirt with someone else.”
It was true, you supposed. You always let the men come up to you if they were interested, but you never were the one to initiate. Why would you when no one would compare to Aaron anyway? Today you had come here with specific intentions to speak with someone that would piss off Aaron. “You’re right,” You admit softly, “I’m sorry, I just… I wanted you to feel what I’ve been feeling.”
“Do you think I enjoy coming home late and not spending time with you?”
“Yes, I do! You love your job!”
“So you behave like a child because you’re jealous of my job?”
When he says it out loud like that, it sounds ridiculous and your eyes water, “Yes.” You say quietly, “Because I need to make sure you still want me just as much as your job.”
He pinches the bridge of his nose, “Honey, of course I do, but I can’t control when I have more paperwork or a heavier caseload than usual.”
You feel deflated and stupid all of a sudden with the condescension that’s written so clearly on Aaron’s face. “Whatever, let’s just go home.”
“Sweetheart—“
“I don’t want to talk about it. Did you drive the SUV here?”
He looks at you hopelessly and then sighs, “Yes.”
You let him walk a couple of steps ahead of you the whole way, not wanting to let him hold your hand if you were close enough. He did open the car door for you, but you didn’t look at him as you climbed in.
“I’m sorry that I didn’t consider your feelings more this week when I cancelled our dates.” Aaron says. You remain quiet. “I’m nearly certain I’ll be off work this weekend. I’ll make it up to you then.”
You can’t help the roll of your eyes, “You have to stop making me promises that you can’t keep. We all know you’ll probably get a case in the middle of the weekend.”
His fingers flex on the steering wheel, “I don’t know what you want from me.”
“Aaron, I’m not even mad about you not being here all the time. I accepted that when we first started dating. I just hate when you promise you’ll do something and then you don’t do it. We planned this dinner weeks and weeks ago and you swore to me you’d get it off. And then we had to reschedule the reservation three nights in a row and you still didn’t show. Then you do show up, but only for the chance to be mad at me and condescend me which just tells me that you could have left work tonight if you wanted to. That’s why I’m mad.”
He supposed you were right. He had ended up leaving work early because he was upset with you. He knew that hadn’t been your intention, you had expected him to quietly stew in his anger until the next morning or until you had come home that night. But he had done it all the same, unable to bear even the idea of you flirting with another man in his absence. He figured it had to do with previously being cheated on because of his job, but he knew you would never do that. Knew that your relationship wasn’t fundamentally broken in that way, could tell by the way adoration still glowed in your eyes when he came home every night. But if he wasn’t careful, he wondered if you ever would. Just the thought had his knuckles whitening as he clenched the steering wheel. It was this thought that had made him punch that lawyer back at the bar.
When you arrive home, you get out of the car without waiting for Aaron, unlocking the door before he’s even out of the car and heading inside, heels in hand. Jack was sleeping at a friend’s house tonight as it was supposed to be date night. You don’t slam the bedroom door, but you close it as Aaron is walking down the hallway which in his mind is the same thing. He stops in the middle of the hallway, wondering if he should go in anyway. A minute later, he hears the intro to The Phantom of the Opera blaring from your bedroom.
He sighs, “Fuck.” He murmurs to himself and turns away from the room. Your mutual love of the theater had been something the two of you had bonded over early in the relationship. Aaron had learned quickly there was a specific stage performance of Phantom of the Opera that you turned to for comfort. If he ever came home to it playing, he knew you had had a bad day. Rarely, though, had you put it on after a fight with him.
He heads to the kitchen and turns on the electric kettle figuring he’d better come into the bedroom with your favorite tea if he was going to brave it at all. He sits down as he waits, resting his head in his hands. The two of you rarely ever fight and so Aaron is still trying to figure out how to do that with you in a productive way.
The kettle switches off and he pours the boiling water into your favorite mug, dunking your favorite tea bag before leaving it to steep. He takes a deep breath before picking up the mug and walking to the bedroom. When he enters, you don’t look at him until he stops by your nightstand, noticing he brought you tea. The gesture is sweet and so you sigh and pause the show.
“Hi.” You say softly to your boyfriend who’s still standing next to you.
“Hi.” He says gently, “I’m sorry.”
“For what?” You say, and he knows it’s a test.
“For making promises I know I can’t keep. For leaving work early after I told you I wouldn’t be able to solely to punch whatever man wanted to sleep with you. For patronizing you.”
You cover your hand with his, “And I’m sorry for flirting to intentionally make you upset. You know I’d never actually do that, right?”
Aaron looks down at your hands, “I saw the way you had spread your legs for him, just a little bit, and I…” He sighs, “I never told you this, but my last wife cheated on me because I wasn’t around enough and seeing you like that, I guess I just…” He trailed off shaking his head, “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have snapped like that.”
“Baby,” You say softly, eyes wide, “I’m so sorry, I had no idea… I never would’ve done that if I had known.”
“I know.” He gives you a small smile.
“Why don’t you come lay down and tell me about your day?”
His smile grows and he crawls into bed, laying his head in your lap and your fingers begin combing through his hair as he talks about the case.
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blank-space-daisy13 · 3 years ago
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Why I won’t invite my biological father to my wedding.
I wanted to post this on Instagram or Facebook but I don’t want to deal with people saying I’m “drama.” But I wanted to write this out just in case someone is ballsy enough to ask me.
Let’s start off with the fact that after he got with my step mom, he wasn’t really around. He also never really cared or tried to take care of us (my brother and me) unless he absolutely had to.
Before my step mom and when we still lived in the apartment, On nights he had us my mom would drop us off already fed, he’d turn the tv on and go play on his computer until we had to go to bed. If he had us on a weekend, same thing. We’d wake up and he’d feed us breakfast, then tv with him in his room on the computer, lunch, tv, dinner, tv, and bed. When we moved from the apartment we stayed at his buddy’s house where he rented a room but guess what? He’d send us down to the basement all day to watch tv, and let us up for meals.
When my stepmom came into the picture, we started going to Canada. On every single one of his weekends. She was nice, at first. Sooner or later everyone shows their true colors. But she started slowly to get a hold of my dad. (My dad had no boundaries with us and she wanted to “help” my dad learn to discipline, but she’s a little extreme.) I once got punished for saying the word “butt” because we only say, “bum” and he yelled at me. Yelled. I was about 7 or 8. Then I heard my future step mother telling him how good he did. Also while we were there, I remember very few times we actually hung out with my dad. It was always being shoved into the playroom with my brother, future stepsister, and sometimes future stepbrother. (Step mom never had full custody of stepbrother.) We’d never leave the playroom other than for meals like the TV. But at least we weren’t rotting our brains, I guess.
After awhile he decided he wanted 50/50 custody. My stepmom at this point could be brutal emotionally. I remember getting yelled at for not knowing any of my immediate family member’s birthdays. I was about 8 or 9. Kind of shitty don’t you think? Going back to the wanting 50/50 custody, he didn’t actually want us. Looking back I understand this now. He just didn’t want to pay as much child support, and that’s probably the only reason my step mom agreed to this. They treated us (my brother and i) horribly. He moved close to my mom’s to prove he’d be willing to do the 50/50 custody, and at that point it was hell. If we did something wrong, immediately we’d get soap in the mouth. My brother later on was getting hot sauce. It would be for things such as, “not sharing with your step sister,” (which she would’ve lied about) or “talking back,” when as a kid I was asking a simple question about their rules. They had so many rules to the point you didn’t realize you were breaking a rule until they told you it was one. My *fondest* memory was when they’d send us kids to the basement for a few hours during the weekend and then got mad when we went through boxes and such to find toys to play with. Because when they first sent us down there, they sent us down there with nothing at all. Sure we probably shouldn’t have gone through boxes, where my brother and I found our toys that they never put with our step sister’s toys, but they sent us down there with nothing at all. They expected us to “imagine” things with no toys. I also got yelled at one weekend because they asked us to clean our bathrooms. (Step sister and I shared a Jack and Jill bathroom and my brother had his own bathroom as well.) We went and picked things up and went back to play. They both yelled at us and said, “If I had meant pick up I would’ve said pick up. I said CLEAN.” At this point I had never cleaned a bathroom in my life. They gave us the cleaning supplies and we went to work. I did what I thought was the best I could do and then my stepmom yells at me, “That wasn’t nearly long enough!!!! Haven’t you ever cleaned a bathroom before?!” Uh no ma’am, I was literally 10. But that was her favorite way to make us feel like shit. To yell, “Haven’t you done XY&Z before?” Or “You don’t know (blank)?! So disrespectful! You should know these things!” (That was said about the birthdays. Again I was a decently young kid.) But going forward, towards the end of them living there, they had a baby together, my other brother J.
Luckily for my brother and I, he eventually gave up going for the 50/50 custody. But with doing this, he left and we didn’t see him for a long time. 5-6 years approximately. I was 15 when he decided he wanted to see us again, and because of everything we had gone through before, we didn’t want to. I had a choice but my brother didn’t, and I was forced to go.
At this point he had married my stepmother, and was living in the same subdivision, and one road away, where had had a house with my mom when they were married. Kind of awkward but ok.
And I have to say, they were better. To a point. They wanted us to feel bad that we didn’t want to be there. At the time I had a really old phone, not a smart phone, that didn’t lock, but they expected my phone to be on the counter at 9pm every night. They read my texts and held them against me, but when I called them out on reading my texts, they told me I was crazy. I would text my friends that I didn’t want to be there, and that I was uncomfortable. They asked me, “Why don’t you want to be here? Why are you uncomfortable? We understand what we did in the past was wrong, but the past is the past and you have to forgive us!” (One wrong thing I was always taught was you always have to forgive. You don’t always have to forgive for things that hurt you.) Finally at the end of this period, they sat us down and tried to make us feel bad by saying, “If you don’t want to be here, we don’t want you here. We want you to want to be here.” At 15 I tried to explain why this was hard, but they didn’t care. It wasn’t their way so they weren’t ok with it.
Fast forward to my Senior Year of high school, I don’t remember how, but my father and I got in touch. My step mom wanted nothing to do with me because of a dumb YouTube video I made at 14 where I “talked shit” about her daughter and herself. Yes, I did, but who didn’t do something dumb at 14? I wasn’t allowed around their house because HER son had a “drug problem.” (Marijuana) Whatever, I didn’t care. Slowly we lost touch because I was the only one calling, and I got sick of it. I was done. But I was still young.
Fast forward to me being a sophomore in college. I was 20 or 21. My brother had an issue that got the police and CPS involved. My father decided to text me and ask me what was going on. I called him and told him that he had “no fucking reason to know what was going on” because he was never around. He gaslighted me into feeling bad because I cussed him out for 10 minutes. But we kept contact after that because I had thought about it and I wanted to get to know my little brother J more. We did lose contact again but then we gain it back later on.
Skip forward a couple years and I’m talking to my cousin, (another thing was he kept us from his side of the family and I had lost contact with most of them until I was an adult.) my cousin told me he was going to MY little BABY sister’s 1st birthday. My father had been talking to me for a few months at this point and NEVER mentioned I had a baby sister. He told me, “I thought your aunt posted about it. I saw it on Facebook and assumed you knew!” It doesn’t matter whether I saw it on Facebook or not. He should’ve told me. But whatever, I let that go too.
Here is where I get frustrated. I wouldn’t call for a couple weeks because I didn’t think about it. I’ve only seen him twice in the past 9 years. But he would blame me for us not talking, when he’d never call or try to talk to me. It drives me crazy when people think like that. It’s not just my responsibility and mine alone.
Skip forward to a few months ago when he brought up politics. I hated this because I’m mostly liberal/democrat and he’s 100% republican. He called liberals “libtards” and goes, “you’re not a libtard are you?” And when I tell him it’s offensive he says, “It’s just a joke!” But now we’re here and yet again it’s been 2 or 3 months since we’ve spoken because he’s blocked my number. It goes straight to voicemail and my texts aren’t going through as iMessages. I’ve decided after trying for over two months, he’s uninvited to the wedding. He’s never met my fiancé, ever. We were only inviting him to be civil. But if he can’t even speak to me, I feel it’s not my problem, and it’s one less drama issue to worry about at the wedding.
My family can believe what they want. There are so many things left out of this 15 year drama circle of my father just disappearing. And I don’t care anymore. I hope someone asks why he wasn’t invited because I know for a fact he’ll be at least telling the whole family that he wasn’t invited. And I don’t mind sending them this so they can know why.
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hoboal87 · 4 years ago
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Carry On
Pairing : Sam x Reader, Platonic!Dean x Reader
Summary : One year after defeating Chuck, Sam and Dean are still hunting, but you’ve quit the life. When the boys take a vacation that quickly turns into a hunt, none of you expect it to change your lives forever.
Characters : Y/N, Sam Winchester, Dean Winchester, mentions of Bobby, Jody, Donna and the Girls
Word Count : 3.1k (I tried to keep it below 3k, but...😕)
Warnings : SPOILERS FOR 15X20, Angst, Feels, Fluff (it gets a little gross at the end), A Sprinkling of Pre-Smut, Pregnancy
A/N : This will keep the canon of the finale, and takes place during and after 15x20, but with an added reader insert. This was written as a sequel to “The Tie” but can be read as a stand-alone.
A/N 2 : This is my entry for @negans-lucille-tblr “6k Roll the Dice Challenge.” My prompt is “I didn’t have it in myself to go with grace,” which is bolded.
No Beta, all mistakes are my own.
Check out my Masterlist here
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You pull another book down from the library wall; everything has been relatively quiet since Jack took over Heaven, Rowena has put a leash on the demons, the only monsters you and the boys had to worry about were run-of-the-mill, so to speak. Adjusting to this new life is easier than you thought it would be, using the last year to learn that without the necessity to hunt, you and Sam were finally free to live your own lives. After Chuck was rendered powerless, you decided to give up hunting for good. Sam won't, you know that, Sam and Dean had been hunting their whole lives, but you were thrust into the life.
You make your way back towards your shared room with Sam, twirling the small diamond ring on your finger, passing Dean’s along the way. You peer inside, glad to see that the once mass trove of empty beer and whiskey bottles were gone. Sure, there’s still a few bottles strewn throughout the room, but nothing like it was before. In the months following Cas’ death, Dean had been a shell of himself, drinking himself into an early grave. He never told you or Sam exactly how Cas summoned the empty, or why it took him along with Billie. Dean always kept himself bottled up, until he would explode, letting his grief out by way of yelling and screaming. Cas’ trench was usually hanging in the corner, but it wasn’t there now, Dean must’ve taken it with him. Dean was still in pain, that much was clear.
Sam and Dean are off at some pie fest, and you opted to stay behind. You waved the boys off, asking Dean to eat a pie just for you. Sam and Dean needed this; brother time. It was something that rarely happened since you joined them over five years ago, even before you were with Sam, you, Cas or Jack were always tagging along. You saw it as the perfect opportunity to take some time for yourself as well, figuring out where you and Sam would go from here. Sam talked about going back to school, finishing his degree and applying to Law School again, he even had you buy him books on LSAT prep. You talked at length about taking the next steps in your relationship, you couldn’t ever get legally married, but you starting planning a ceremony anyway. Before Chuck was gone, you were content to just be, never needing more, afraid that it would be ripped out from under you the minute you let your guard down.
As you settle into your and Sam’s bed, book in hand, you feel as the weight that’s been sitting on your chest has finally lifted, you can breathe. It's been years since you've been able to truly relax, and as much fun as a pie fest sounded, you wanted to stay at the bunker, taking comfort in your and Sam's shared room. They’d only been gone a few days, but you already missed Sam terribly, pathetic, you know. Never in your life would you have imagined wanting and needing someone like you did Sam. The next morning you wake up to a text from Sam. The brothers mini-vacation quickly turned into a vampire hunt, a nest John had hunted years ago. The boys could handle it, you know that much, it's a milk run compared to everything they've fought over the years. Be Safe, Love You. You responded and went on with your day.
Sam always keeps you in the loop when he and Dean go on a hunt without you, providing you with a source of comfort knowing that they’ve killed the bad guy or solved the mystery. But now, they’ve been silent for too long, a nest of Vamps shouldn’t take more than a few days, and you start to worry. You’re heading towards the garage, determined to track down Sam and Dean, and lay it on thick about how worried you were when they went silent. You’re about to open the door to the garage when it swings open and Sam’s long body fills the frame. It startles you at first, even causing Miracle to bark in surprise. You throw your arms around Sam, all anger gone now that he’s back home with you.
“Don’t ever do that again!” You scold Sam. “You know how much I hate it when you and Dean stop responding.” You want to be mad, but you’re so focused on the fact that Sam’s back home with you again, that nothing else seems to matter. “If you’re gonna keep hunting you have to keep me in the loop,” you mumble.
Sam’s body stiffens against your touch. It takes him a minute, but he reciprocates your hug, pulling you tight against him. You stand there, waiting for some smart remark from Dean, normally barking at the two of you to get a room, but there’s nothing but the echo of the Impala’s engine filling the air. You try to pull away from Sam, but his grip around you only tightens, this hunt must have been more difficult than he or Dean anticipated. Head pressed against Sam’s chest, you can hear his heart thumping loudly and rapidly. Dean would never let you and Sam hold on to each other as long as you have.
“Sammy?” You whisper, trying to pull away again. Sam’s grip finally loosens, but his hands don’t leave you as you take a small step back. Your eyes travel upwards, finally landing on Sam’s face, his eyes are bloodshot and puffy, almost as if he has been crying. “Sam? What’s wrong?”
Sam shakes his head as tears fill his eyes.
“Where’s Dean?” You ask as you watch Sam slowly break down. His head nods towards the Impala, and you pull away completely from Sam’s embrace.
You run towards the Impala as fast as your legs can carry you, a swing open the back door, hoping to see Dean’s shining emerald eyes. Tears blur your vision faster than you can comprehend what you’re seeing. Dean’s lifeless body lays in the back seat, all color drained from him. You scan him desperately, waiting for some kind of sign that this is all a cruel prank, that he and Sam were trying to get one over you for not coming with them on this hunt.
But, there’s nothing.
You scream out, falling to your knees, Dean was just as much your brother as he was Sam’s, he was your best friend, and now, he’s gone. Your cries fill the otherwise silent garage, he can’t be dead, not like this, not on some vampire hunt, something he’s done a hundred times before. Not when you know that he was looking to settle down, find some normalcy, or at least normal for him. He deserved to live, he didn’t deserve to die at the hands of a monster.
Dean wasn’t going to be there when you and Sam got married, when you told Sam about the baby you were carrying. God, how were you going to tell him that? Dean was going to help you surprise Sam, as soon as they came home, he was going to start dropping hints, see how long it took Sam to figure it out. But now, you stared at his body, tearing streaming down your face, you couldn’t stop crying if you wanted to. Sam’s strong arms wrap around you, holding you close to him, and you both sit on the floor, unable to do anything but mourn the loss of the elder Winchester.
Through your sobs, you can hear Sam trying to offer you some comfort, assuring you that he went down saving the victims. You could barely process anything he was saying, and if this is how you felt, you can’t even begin to imagine how he feels. Dean was the only real family that Sam had left, there had to be a way to get him back.
“No, baby,” Sam murmurs in your ear through his tears, “I promised him. No bringing him back.” You didn’t realize you had said it out loud. “He wants us to keep going, he wants us to live.”
Three days later you’re surrounded by all the family you’d gained through the boys. Jody, Donna, Claire, Bobby and Charlie plus too many people to keep track of. You and Sam had already given Dean his proper send-off, dividing his ashes between the graveyard where Mary and John were buried and keeping the rest for yourselves. Jody told the story of the first time she’d met the brothers over ten years ago and how she’d come to think of the boys as surrogate sons. Claire talked about the time she and Dean went mini-golfing and how offended he was when she didn’t understand his Caddyshack references. The bunker was full laughter, it was Dean told you he wanted all those years ago.
You and Sam couldn’t stay in the Bunker after that. You’d left it open to all hunters, you’d still come back occasionally, but it was no longer home. You and Sam packed up most of your and Dean’s things, fitting as much as you could into the Impala, knowing that the two rooms would always be off limits to future hunters. Sam nearly slides into the passenger seat when you leave, and you can see it hitting him all over again. Dean’s gone.
You drive around the country for a few weeks, unsure of where to make your new home. Neither of you ever had a real home before moving into the Bunker, and you were the only family you had left now. You settle in Sioux Falls, Jody and the girls were there, Donna was close enough, and if need be, you could be back in Lebanon in a matter of 5 hours.
You find a small house close to where Bobby’s used to be, it is still a salvage yard, but Bobby’s house is long gone. As the weeks pass you don’t know how much longer you can keep your pregnancy hidden from Sam. Every time you try to tell him, it feels wrong; you are both still grieving the loss of Dean, and Sam has fallen into a deep depression. You have Jody take you to your doctor appointments, and she scolds you for not telling Sam, but when she drops you at your new home, and sees the current state of Sam, she backs off.
At your next appointment, she laughs and cries with you when you learn that you were carrying a boy, Dean. When you first told Dean that you were pregnant, he immediately insisted that the newest Winchester should be named after him, “boy or girl!” He insisted, “I’m named after a Deanna.”
“I think the world only needs one Dean Winchester,” you retorted playfully. Now, it seems the perfect way to carry on Dean’s legacy.
When you leave the doctors, you finally realize how obvious it is that you’re pregnant, your stomach rounding out perfectly under your shirt. You’re almost insulted that Sam hasn’t noticed your ever-growing stomach and the extra pounds you’ve put on over the last month, but he hasn't been himself since Dean died. You hadn’t been intimate with him since you settled into your new house, and he spends most of his day sleeping or in a fugue-like state.
Jody insists on taking you shopping for baby supplies, and by the end you’ve got a shopping cart onesies, blankets, something called a diaper genie, and many other things you didn’t even know you needed. As you walk through the store an iron-on name display catches your eye, and you make your way towards it. The names are written in large cursive lettering, and you hope that you can find the right one. You nearly squeal when you do, and find a plain onesie to attach it to.
You’re glad that the baby store carries labeless bags, especially when Sam is up and about when you get home. He looks good today, he’s slightly sweaty, and you know that he left the house and went for a run. He greets you with a quick kiss, a sheen of sweat covering his face, and makes for your room. He eyes the bags in your hands, but doesn’t say anything, and a few minutes later you can hear the shower running. Thank God, you sigh and take the bags into an empty room, Miracle following closely behind you. You set the bags down in what will be baby Dean’s nursery, Jody’s right, you think, we’ve got a lot of catching up to do.
You find the onesie and the iron-on decal, you place it in the center and carefully attach the decal. After letting it cool you tuck it into a small gift bag. You hear the shower turn off, and make your way back into your bedroom, placing the bag on your bedside table, waiting for Sam to exit the bathroom. You can’t help but stare at him appreciatively when he opens the door, a towel wrapped around his waist. You’re suddenly very aware of how long it's been since you’d been with him. Sam catches you eyeing him, and smirks, sending a jolt straight down to your core. You missed this, not just the sex, but how he takes charge with you, his domineering presence making you melt. He leans over you, and places a tender yet eager kiss on your lips.
You reach for the towel, letting it slide onto the floor as Sam deepens the kiss, and start to work him over in your hands. Sam groans at your touch, and starts to pull at your shirt, pulling his face away just long enough to rid you of it. Sam’s lips are back on yours just as quickly as they were gone. His hands palm at your breasts, and you moan into his hands reach into the overflowing cups, you really loved your pregnancy boobs, but your bras were doing very little to keep them in place. Sam’s hands travel to your back, and undos your bra, letting your breasts fall free. Sam finally opens his eyes when his hands land on your protruding stomach and takes a few steps back.
He quickly pulls on a pair of sweatpants as you pull your shirt back over your head, trying you best not to cry as he starts pacing the floor of your bedroom. You wait for him to say something, anything; you weren’t trying when you realized you were pregnant. You’d just gone off your birth control, and everyone told you it would take at least a few months for your body to get back to its natural cycle. You both knew it was possible but figured you’d have at least 6 months before really actively trying for a baby.
Sam’s face is almost unreadable; you can’t tell if he’s happy or mad, if he’ll tell you it’s too soon, that he’s not ready. He opens and closes his mouth multiple times, as if he can’t figure out what to say. If Dean were here, he’d probably knock him upside his head, telling him this exactly what he’s always wanted.
“How– why–” Sam stammers as you move to the edge of the bed. “Are you– You’re pregnant.” He says it almost as if it’s a question and you nod your head. “How long?” There’s almost an accusation in his voice, you’re sure it’s not intentional, but it doesn’t make you feel any better.
“18 weeks,” you murmur, trying to hold back your tears. “I wanted to tell you sooner, but it’s– it never seemed to be the right time. When you and Dean–” Sam winces at the mention of Dean’s name, you hadn’t said it out loud in almost a month, not since you left the Bunker. “I found out right before you left, I was going to tell you when you got back. But… after… I was afraid that you’d say it wasn’t the right time. That it was too soon.”
“It is too soon,” Sam mutters under his breath, you’re sure it’s not meant to be malicious, but it doesn’t make it hurt any less. “You said it would take at least 6 months.”
“It’s different for everyone,” you offer, as Sam runs his hands through his hair, still pacing in front of you. “Please, Sam, can you sit down? You’re freaking me out.” Sam moves to the edge of the bed, and sits down next to you.
“I don’t know if I can do this,” Sam whispers, eyeing your belly. “I don’t know how– I don’t know how to be a dad.”
“Yes, you do,” you grab his hand, and place it on your belly. “Dean taught you everything you would ever need to know.”
Sam smiles sadly, “I ever tell you about the night I left for Stanford?” You shake your head. “Dad and me, we got into this huge fight. So of course, Dean steps in– gets between us, attempts to calm us, but we were both just– just too fucking stubborn to listen.” He removes his hand, focusing down on them as he fidgets. “When dad said don’t come back, I called his bluff, and I was– I was so pissed at Dean, I thought he was taking Dad’s side, that I didn’t even say bye to him. I didn’t have it myself to go with grace. I walked away from him, the only family that I had, and I regretted it for years. I- I feel like he should be the one here, that- that we’re moving on too quickly.”
“Dean, he– he wouldn’t want you, us, to live like this, we owe it to him to keep fighting, to live our lives. I know how much you miss him,” a tear slips from Sam’s eye. “I miss him too, but you know what keeps me going everyday?” Sam shakes his head, and you take his hand in yours again, and place it back on the swell of your belly just as little Dean decides to kick for the first time. The smile on Sam’s face is instant, you can’t stop the happy tears from falling as Sam shifts in front of you, and lays his head on your swollen stomach. “Our son.”
Sam cries, truly cries for the first time since the day he brought home Dean’s body. You hold him against you, he’s been so pent up for the last 3 months, bottling up his emotions, he needs this, you both do. You’d been so focused on the baby growing inside of you never realized that you hadn’t realized that Sam had never come to terms with Dean’s death.
“It’s a boy?” Sam asks as his cries cease. “We’re having a son?”
“We’re having a son,” you nod, and hand Sam the gift bag still sitting on your bedside table.
Sam opens the bag, and you smile as he pulls out the green onesie, his eyes lighting up as he reads the lettering.
“You’re sure?” He questions.
“The world lost one Dean Winchester, let’s give it another.”
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hiccanna-tidbits · 3 years ago
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okay, okay but hear me out!
Hiccanna, Moanida and Jackunzel (and maybe someone else if u want) going on a holiday trip together (it could be sea or lake or just swimming pool).
And that three couples playing "chicken fight game"~ When u have to sit on partner shoulder or ridding piggy-back and knock down or separate the other couple!
sksksks just imagine the fun and the chaos!! hahaha
Okay SO I recently watched Palm Springs so I’m just imagining The Gang going to like…a fancy pool resort in like Arizona??? SURE LET’S GO WITH THAT
I’m imagining the only resort the gang could afford to stay at is someplace out in the middle of Arizona or something
It takes a LOT of persuading to get Jack to go, because he haaaaates deserts. Rapunzel basically has to beg. Moana finally managed to bribe him with really good homemade ice slushies. (She’s used to making smoothies for Merida, so how hard can slushies be??? Just throw in some ice!)
Rapunzel offers to help Moana with the slushies, since she gave Jack SO many puppy dog eyes to get him to come. Since they’ve got two people working on them, they’re REALLY good slushies. Jack approves.
Anna also tries to convince Elsa to go, but the perpetually-single Elsa is just like “Um, deserts? Sunburns? Being indefinitely stuck with gross couples doing gross couple stuff?!? Yeah no thank you”
Hiccup tries to wake everyone up at like 6 am to go hiking because "that's when the desert iguanas are out guys!!! C'mon, we have to go!!!" Anna is only persuaded to go after Hiccup makes her coffee--she really wants to make her bf happy, but also mornings can suck her dick. Rapunzel is more than happy to go, because she loves mornings anyways!!! And oh my god, IGUANAS!!! Jack, Merida, and Moana are like "oh FUCK no" and put the pillow back over their head, shoo Hiccup away, and go back to sleep.
On their hike, Hiccup just goes "!!!!!!!" about every reptile he sees. Snake, lizard, horny toad, literally anything with scales will send the boy into an excited frenzy. Rapunzel has similar reactions. Anna could not love both of them more.
At one point, they stumble across a gila monster sunbathing, and Rapunzel is overtaken with the unwavering desire to adopt him. She gets Hiccup on board, and he tries to lure the lizard over with a dusty piece of a snake carcass he found (Anna tried to tell him he really shouldn't touch that, but he was not to be swayed and Anna ended up figuring he could just wash his hands really well when they got back). Anna finds herself in the unusual position of having to be the Voice of Reason, having to be like “hey uh I think this might be illegal and stuff??? Also aren't they poisonous???”
(I know what you're thinking. Bold of you to assume Anna knows the difference between poisonous and venomous.)
Rapunzel literally CANNOT stop gushing to Jack about all the wildlife she saw when she gets back! Jackrabbits! Kangaroo rats! Roadrunners! Peccaries! Centipedes! Jack has only mild to moderate interest in desert ecology, but loves hearing his gf gush so he listens attentively anyways. 
Anna and Rapunzel definitely hit up the gift shops in the resort town at some point, and go ABSOLUTELY BATSHIT HOGWILD buying gifts for everyone. They probably max out their credit cards. It's embarrassing, really. But Anna gets Hiccup an absolute shitton of those little wall lizard things and he nearly cries tears of joy when he sees them, so it's all worth it, really.
Moana will not leave the pool like. The entire time. The girl is just obsessed with being in the water, honestly. She gets restless, though, and can't just stand in the pool and vibe--she needs to constantly be moving and swimming around or she'll explode. Merida is more than happy to indulge her by hanging out in the poor with her, but Merida is also constantly challenging her to swim races--a very dumb idea, considering Moana is on the high school swim team and water polo team. Merida, naturally, is an extremely sore loser and is not above excessive pouting, splashing, yelling in angry Scottish, and dunking her girlfriend in revenge. It's at least entertaining for all of their friends to watch.
Jack keeps fucking taking huge buckets of ice from the ice machine and dumping them in the pool. At first he only does this because he keeps griping about the pool not being cold enough (this boy will accept nothing less than sitting in the goddamn arctic ocean), but after her figures out that it pisses off his friends, he takes to pouring said ice directly over their heads. Merida has threatened to murder him several times for this.
Hiccup and Anna's main pool activity is just lazing around on their pool floaties (Anna has a duck one, Hicccup has a dragon one because obviously), sipping cocktails, and just generally vibing. Through some ungodly mixture of pure charisma and a fake ID that Rapunzel helped photoshop, Jack manages to talk his way into getting the whole group access to alcohol. Hiccup is a sangria or Moscow Mule kinda guy while Anna usually gets a Pina Colada or a Sex on the Beach (she's aspec, so she literally will not stop joking about the irony of this). Merida makes a game out of attempting to tip over their floaties and dunk them. Jack, chaos gremlin that he is, puts aside his usual rivalry with Merida to join in. They have a surprisingly strong dunking alliance.
Hiccup and Anna try to form a syndicate of their own, and try to lounge on the same floatie so that they can protect each other while fighting off Jack and Merida together. Unfortunately neither of their floaties were made to hold 2 peoples' weight, so the one they're on ends up tipping over, spilling their cocktails everywhere and dunking them anyways. Jack and Merida consider this a Win By Default.
Moana of course loops everyone into playing water polo at some point. Unfortunately some idiot decided it would be a good idea to let Merida of all people pick the teams, which means of course that they are incredibly rigged. It's Moana, Merida and Anna vs. Jack, Rapunzel, and Hiccup, so basically The Jocks vs. The Nerds (although admittedly Anna is more of a softcore jock--she's nowhere near on Moana or Merida's level, but she's still more naturally athletic than Hiccup, Rapunzel, or Jack). Naturally, Jock Team absolutely whoops Nerd Team's ass. Jack gets salty and demands a rematch. ...Jock Team kicks Nerd Team's ass again.
Throughout all of this, no one thinks to just...rearrange the teams a little. Merida was counting on this. All according to plan.
In the titular chicken game (yes, I remembered, don't worry!), it's Merida on Moana's shoulders (Moana swims and has a lot of upper body strength, what can I say?), Hiccup on Anna's shoulders (I mean...Hiccup's a twig, and Anna HAS to have a fair amount of upper body strength from throwing busts around and punching men off boats and such), and Punz on Jack's shoulders (Jack's pretty lithe and good at keeping his balance while jumping around, so he's their best candidate for not just falling over).
Jack and Rapunzel actually manage to stay in the game longer than anyone expects--their primary strategy is “be good at dodging and staying out of the way while Merida and Hiccup duke it out.” And it works! As limber as Hiccup is, Anna's not nearly as coordinated as Jack and is no match for Moana's sturdy footing. Also, neither Anna nor Hiccup are prepared for how goddamn ruthless and determined to win Merida is. Even though they really, really should have been. I mean...have you met Merida???
When it comes down to Merida-Moana and Rapunzel-Jack, Mer feels a little bad for having to go up against Pure Sweet Punzie. Unfortunately, Rapunzel turns out to be a very hardcore fighter when she puts her mind to it, and Merida is much more evenly matched than she initially thought and realizes she must use her Full Power. It definitely helps her snap out of Going Soft when Jack starts brutally roasting Merida in particular (as per usual). Merida gets a rage-fueled Second Wave, and finally manages to knock Rapunzel over in one foul swoop. Merida and Moana are victorious!
Moana and Merida basically always shower together after a day at the pool. They claim it's because they both know how to handle curly hair in chlorine, and just like to wash each other's hair, but the rest of the gang is pretty sure that's not all that's going on in there.
One day, Anna hits up the resort town alone to buy some kind of secret gifts for her friends with what little money she has left (this girl seriously has no chill when it comes to buying presents).  She goes past this huge, fancy ice cream shop and she's like “!!!! OMG!!! I'm gonna surprise all my buddies with pints of their faves!!!” She just gets super hyped and buys everyone ice cream, getting so caught up in the thrill of it that she forgets that she'll have to like. Drive all this back all the way back to the resort in the rental car. In like. You know. 110+ degree weather.
By the time she gets back to the resort, the ice cream is, of course, goop. Poor Anna, feeling incredibly dumb and like an utter failure of a friend, just kind of bursts into tears. Like damn. This is too much. She was gonna make all her pals so happy, and all for naught! Jack just kinda shrugs and throws all the melted ice cream cartons in the freezer anyways. Once they're (partially) re-frozen, Rapunzel and Moana make slushies with them. They actually come out pretty decent. Anna is substantially cheered up.
Moana prepares some tropical fruit platters for everyone to snack on. Rapunzel tries to “improve” them by adding chocolate sauce and nutella to half of them. Sometimes it works (I mean...bananas and strawberries with chocolate and/or nutella is pretty solid). Other times it just tastes...very weird. Merida gest frustrated and yells at Rapunzel for “ruining all of her girlfriend's good mangoes.”
Jack just thinks this whole thing is so funny, and decides to swap the chocolate sauce with barbecue sauce to cause further chaos. Absolute mayhem ensures. Everyone has a bad time. Except for Anna, who apparently is just a freak who enjoys eating pineapple slices dipped in barbecue sauce.
At some point, Merida gets really drunk on appletinis or some shit and signs the entire group up for a local archery competition. Much to everyone's chagrin, it's no refunds. Naturally, basically everyone sans Merida does terrible. Rapunzel and Hiccup very nearly shoot themselves, while Jack and Anna come very close to  accidentally shooting a group of referees (although Jack might have done this on purpose). Moana gets the farthest, if only because Merida's taught her how to shoot a bow at some point. Merida actually ends up winning--although unfortunately, the prize is $20 and a very cheap plastic trophy (which Merida STILL manages to find a way to break before the trip is even over).
The rest of the group is much more amicable to the concept of going on hikes when said hikes are in the evening. Hiccup and Rapunzel are still excitedly chattering about the local ecosystems the entire time, and Jack and Anna are just kind of looking at their nerdy SOs like “<3 <3 <3″ Moana and Merida, meanwhile, are just kinda vibing in the back, passively listening in and watching the desert sunset.
Rapunzel manages to capture Mer and Mo's interest and gets them to participate more with geology, of all things. Merida just thinks rocks are cool (especially when they can be thrown at people bothering her!), while Moana likes learning about the physical history of places--how water can carve out landscapes, and all that. Hiccup and Jack just kind of exchange a look like “I had no idea that they were into rocks, but...the more you know, I guess???”
Jack makes fun of every reptile they see, mainly to piss Hiccup off. Unfortunately it has the opposite effect, and Hiccup can't help but be entertained--mainly because Jack's insults are so weirdly specific and over-the-top that they loop around to being hilarious. Seriously, he keeps saying shit like “Those are the lamest scales I've ever seen. Absolutely drab, and not nearly shiny enough to prove that nature is beautiful. 0/10.” and “Ohhhh, this fucking rattlesnake think's he's so scary, with his dumb percussion instrument tail!!! I could be more intimidating with a mean look and a large pair of maracas!”
At some point, a bunch of tourists riding donkeys pass them. Anna, Rapunzel, and Merida just absolutely lose their shit fangirling over how cute the donkeys are, thus exposing all three of them as the unabashed Horse Girls they are. Hiccup, Jack, and Moana find this extremely amusing, and definitely aren't above teasing their girlfriends about it. Hiccup asks if next time they take a couples' vacation, the Horse Gang (as Moana insists on nicknaming them) would like to go to a ranch instead.
Anna gets like. Obsessed with palm trees. Like they're just so pretty and exotic and tropical!!! OMG!!! And they definitely don't have them wherever the gang is from in this AU. (Also if griping about Elsa not having "tropical powers" is anything to go by, she DOES canonically like the tropics!) She has to take a picture of like...every palm tree on her phone. And considering the gang is in Arizona, that means Anna is stopping to take a picture like...every 2 minutes. Rapunzel catches onto the fact that Anna likes them, and paints her a picture with some when Punz has the time. Anna definitely cries when she sees it. Hiccup can't do nearly that good, but he does buy her some little plastic figurine ones in a gift shop that she can put in her room. Anna also cries about this. She just cries whenever any of her friends indulge her random fixation on palm trees. Surely she doesn't deserve such niceties!!!
Rapunzel is just. In love with the desert landscape tbh. Like the huge funky cacti!!! The shrubs!!! The desert wildflowers!!! The mesas!!! All of it!!! So of course she needs to pull out her easel and paint it. Jack walks by one day and sees her working on it and, partly just to troll her, he's like “put some snow in it!” As he walks away, Rapunzel just stops like “wait...that'd actually be such a great idea for a surrealist-type fantasy piece!!!” After she finishes the main landscape, she adds an overcoat of little puffs of snow on top of everything, and has some clumps falling off of the cacti. When she shows Jack, he just about cries tears of joy, but frantically tries to hide it. She gives the painting to him as a present at the end of the trip. He hangs that shit front-in-center in his room and cherishes it forever and ever.
At some point, Jack gets the ingenious idea that he's going to prank Merida by catching a tarantula and leaving it in her room. It's one of the harmless ones--Jack fact-checks this by offhandedly asking Hiccup and framing it as a casual interest in local etymology. Still, Merida screams far louder than is at all dignified, and also probably loud enough to wake a neighboring country. Rapunzel later has to physically hold Merida back to keep her from absolutely beating Jack into a pulp. Rapunzel also manages to get the World's Largest Sheet of Cardboard and the World's Largest Cup and somehow manages to get the damn thing back outside.
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wormstacheangel · 4 years ago
Text
"Samstiel? Sastiel?" "Shut up, Sam!"
Word count: 2639
Sam drinks a little love potion that makes him fall for Cas. Dean is not really happy about it when him and Cas are still so new. A little jealous Dean and Cas being a cute boyfriend.
--
“Over there!” Dean whispered out as he pointed with his gun to the room he saw the witch disappear into. 
Following the witch into a big factory that might as well be a maze to them was probably not the brightest idea they had. They have been tracking the damn witch for a week now though and they weren’t going to lose her when they were so damn close. He only had two witch killing bullets left though but he was sure Cas and Sam had more. 
Cas went into the room first with his gun drawn but the angel blade easily accessible just in case. Dean followed in right behind him, almost shoulder to shoulder, while Sam followed a few steps behind to watch their backs. 
“Wonderful.” Dean heard the voice behind him and then quickly turned when he heard a gunshot go off. 
He watched the witch throw something at them and they all froze with groans, fingers ready on the trigger. She whispered something under her breath before she walked around them, her blonde hair falling over her shoulders as she grinned up at them.
“Winchester’s and their pet angel or I should say formal angel.” She hummed happily as she reached over to touch Cas’s face with her fingers. Dean could only see from the corner of his eyes as he tried to get control of his finger at least so he could pull the trigger when needed. “So famous but I don’t want any trouble. My business here is done so I’ll be leaving. Just to make sure you don’t get any funny ideas I’ll give you a small distraction. More for my entertainment and I’m sure a little nuisance for all of you. Still,” She walked over to Sam and carefully opened his mouth to pour something down his throat while Dean struggled to move, a low groan struggled to get out in his throat. “Don’t worry. Nothing deadly, just some fun. Can’t have the queen be too angry at me.”
She winked at them as he turned Sam around to face Cas. “There! Now the fun can start!”
She started walking out of the room and with a snap of her fingers they all got their control back. Dean pulled the trigger but missed and lost his last two bullets. He started chasing after her but then heard Cas call out to him.
He turned around to see Sam hugging Cas- no...no hugging would at least be a little more normal. Sam was full-on snuggling the ex-angel of the lord. 
“Sam, please,” Cas struggled to push Sam off of him. “The witch, Sam.”
“Let Dean take care of it. I can’t have you getting hurt, Cas.” Sam nuzzled his nose against their best friend's cheek. “Let’s go wait in the car. Do you want to go and eat something after this? I know you like ice cream. Do you want to go get some ice cream?”
Dean could only stare at the odd picture before him. He would have laughed if it didn’t bring a heat at the pit of his stomach. Jealousy taking over as he stomped over to push Sam off Cas. 
“Dude, what are you doing?” Sam shoved at Dean before reaching for Cas again but he moved to stand between them. Sam did that annoyed twitch of the mouth, his tongue poking at the inside of his cheek, as he stared down at him. “Dean, move.”
“I think the witch may have given him some sort of spell,” Cas told Dean as they both watched Sam slowly turning red-faced. 
“Yeah, genius, I got that,” Dean muttered at him and then nearly misses a fist from Sam. “Sammy!”
“Don’t talk to Cas like that!” Sam yelled at Dean as he took that chance to grab Cas’s wrist to shield him behind his overgrow body. “You’re always such an asshole to him!”
“Am not!” Dean argues back and then groans in annoyance. “Why am I arguing with you? Cas, control your new boyfriend.”
Cas poked his head from behind Sam to glare down at Dean, eyebrow raised. “New?”
Dean’s face flushed as he looked away from Cas to mumbled, “You know what I mean.”
Dean and Cas were still sorts of new. No labels just yet because they still had a lot to work through but they shared the occasional kiss. Enjoying each other’s company whenever the opportunity came around and just held one another for comfort. A nice nap snuggled up in one of the recliners in the Dean Cave.
So watching his brother reach to take his almost-boyfriend hand was weird, especially when he definitely had a girlfriend. 
“How about we go get that ice cream, Sam?” Cas asked as he twined their fingers together and smiled up at his little brother. 
Dean’s jealousy rose but he tried to fight it back. Knowing it wasn’t Sam’s fault but hating how he grinned down at Cas. Hating more when he lifted Cas’s hand to press against his lips before he led Cas out of the damn room. Not missing the blush on Cas’s cheeks as he smiled shyly back at Sam. 
“Fuck me.” Dean muttered to himself as he kicked the air and then quickly went to catch up with them. 
At the diner, Dean was on the phone with Rowena as Jack had flown down to watch Sam fall all over Cas. 
“They’re so cute.” Jack cooed at them as Sam wrapped an arm around Cas’s shoulder to pull him close while trying to feed him a fry. 
���Yeah, whatever.” Dean rolled his eyes as he kept waiting for Rowena who was flipping through some sort of book as she once again asked for a picture. “Jack has enough pictures to remember this nightmare.”
“Dean, why don’t you at least try to eat something.” Cas pushed his plate over to him but Dean shook his head as he pushed the plate back.
“I’m not hungry.” He got up to walk outside but Sam grabbed his arm. Dean shook it off as he glared back at his brother. 
“Talk nicely to him, Dean. I’m warning you.”
Dean rolled his eyes and continued walking back outside. Hearing Jack ask for them to pose for another picture to send to Claire who didn’t believe him apparently. 
While Dean leaned against his car Rowena told him that the spell was harmless and will pass through his system in a couple of days. “Nothing really you can do but wait it out.”
Dean shut his eyes as he pinched the bridge of his nose. Sighing in defeat as he nodded, “Okay, well thanks anyway. I’ll have Jack send you those pictures.”
“Oh, he has! They do look quite adorable don’t they.” She teased and Dean said his quick goodbye before hanging up.
“Bad news?” He looked up to see Cas walking over to him with a sheepish smile on his face. He stopped in front of him and then reached to kiss Dean’s cheek, instantly relaxing him. “It’s okay, Dean.”
“How is this okay?” Dean hesitantly reached to wrap his arms around Cas’s waist to pull him close. Hugging him to his chest as he hides his face into Cas’s neck, relaxing as the calm scent of Cas surrounds him. “I haven’t even taken you on a damn date yet and here is Sam buying you ice cream already.”
He feels Cas wrap his arms around him, one of his hands going up and down his back while the other plays with his hair. He smiled against Cas’s skin as he relaxed into the familiar touch. So new and yet familiar all at once. 
“It’s okay cause I’m yours. Not Sam’s.” Cas tells him as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. “Plus, I am pretty sure Sam is in love with Eileen.”
Dean pulls away to let their noses touch before he pressed his forehead to Cas’s own. Then teasingly he asked, “So you’re mine now?”
Cas hummed in agreement as he smiled back at Dean, nuzzling their noses together as they both grinned. “Haven’t I always been?”
They both chuckled softly as they tilted their head just enough to press their lips together for a soft kiss. One that never failed to bring a shiver down Dean’s spine and his toes curl up. Kisses were still new to them and Dean cherished each one he did get. 
“Cas!” They heard Sam call out and Cas pulled away too soon, always too soon. 
“Don’t be so jealous of your brother and let’s take him home. Maybe seeing Eileen will snap him out of it.” Cas tells him before he completely escaped Dean’s grasp and walked to where Sam was still calling out to him. 
Dean stayed there for a few seconds, his lips still tingling from the kiss before he took a deep breath to follow them back to the diner. Watching as Sam wrapped an arm around Cas’s shoulders and leaned down to kiss his cheek.
“Fine,” Dean rolled his shoulders back. “I’m fine.”
The drive back was just a pain as Sam sat in the back seat with Cas, sleeping with his head on Cas’s shoulder while Cas read the book he brought. Jack sat shotgun as he had his headphones on while he played some dumb game on his phone. Cas met his stare every once in a while on the rearview mirror and shared a soft smile with him. Reassuring him that everything was fine. That they were fine. 
Eileen met them in the garage and when Sam saw her he pulled her into a hug. Dean thought that she may have broken the spell-like a cute sleeping beauty story but it only gave Sam a headache as he fought to be with both Eileen and Cas. Dean reached over to check on him but Sam just pushed him away as he told him he was fine before he fell back into Cas arms. 
Eileen smiled, probably the same one Dean has had the whole time. A little awkward and hurt but there was no reasonable reason to be mad when this situation was not normal. Even for them. This was something they couldn’t really control. Even with Cas trying to set boundaries between him and Sam.
“I’ll sleep in my room. You go to bed, Sam, and I’ll see you in the morning.” Cas told him and Dean had to fight that lump in his throat, the bubbling jealousy in his stomach because Cas hasn’t even slept over in his room before. Now Sam is gonna steal that first too?
“Are you going to go with...him?” Sam motioned at Dean with his chin. “Dean, how about you leave us alone for five minutes?”
“How about you shut up and do what you’re told for once?” Dean says back to him. “Go to bed, Samuel.”
“Fuck off, Dean.” Sam tells him as he takes Cas’s arm to lead him inside his room. Dean motions to stop him but Cas holds his hand out. 
“It’s okay, Dean.” He smiled reassuringly at him. “I’ll just stay until Sam falls asleep and then head over to my room. Is that okay?”
“Why are you asking him for permission, Cas?” Sam says as he wraps his arms around Cas’s shoulders from behind him. “He’s not in charge of you.”
Dean locked his jaw to hold back his words before he turned away to walk back to his room. “Whatever. Goodnight.”
“Dean.” Cas called out to him but he kept walking until he made it back to his room and closed the door behind him. 
It was only a few minutes later when Cas was walking into the room, knocking be damned because Cas was annoyed with him. 
“Dean,” He starts again but Dean was already walking over to him to bring him into a kiss. The action surprised Cas as it was one they never really done before. The kiss was not the usual slow or sweet ones they give each other. No Dean was feeling too much to restrain himself. 
He didn’t mean to be so possessive, people can flirt all they want with Cas and Dean wouldn’t bat an eye because they were strangers, but this was Sam. His best friend so Cas was being nice to him. Humoring him because Cas was a rational person and knew this was only a spell. Knowing Sam didn’t actually want him in his bed but the spell did. Dean was having a hard time watching. 
He already couldn’t believe Cas wanted him at all. Always thinking Cas deserved to live the rest of his human life with someone more deserving of his love and seeing him with Sam made him wonder if Cas was rethinking his choice. Maybe he picked the wrong brother. 
Cas pulled away from the kiss breathing heavily as he looked back at Dean with a ditzy smile. “Wow. You’ve been holding back on me.”
“I-I love you, Cas.” Dean says as he pulls Cas into a tight hug. His chin resting on top of Cas’s shoulder as he gripped at his still not official boyfriend. 
He could feel Cas suck in a sharp breath as he stood still in Dean’s arms, “You...you do? I mean,” Cas pulls away just enough to make Dean look at him. “I know you do but you’ve never said it before. Out loud at least. Are you that jealous of Sam?”
“I just want to make sure you know where I stand,” Dean explains to him as he runs his hand down Cas’s jaw until he lets it rest at Cas’s neck. “I know I’m not really good at expressing myself but I’ll try harder, Cas. I promise.”
A gentle smile spread on Cas’s lips as he reached to kiss Dean one more time. So tender and warm that it instantly filled Dean with reassurance. 
“I love you, Dean. I’m in love with you.” Cas said against his lips as he slowly started to pepper him with kisses. Dean stood still with a slow-building grin as Cas kissed his jaw, his nose, his eyelids, his cheeks, and then ended on his forehead before he pulled away. “Please don’t worry so much.”
“Stay?” Dean asked as he nuzzled his nose into Cas’s throat. “I always sleep better in your arms.”
“Of course, Dean.”
The spell ended up lasting three long and slow days. One moment Dean and Sam were arguing about who gets to sit next to Cas during movie night and the next Sam blinks himself out of it. His shoulders falling forward as he holds his head in his free hand.
“Wow. What...what happened?” Sam rubbed his temple and then looked down at his other hand to see his fingers were still twined with Cas’s. “Dude, why are you holding my hand?”
“Fucking finally. Let go of my boyfriend, bitch!” Dean reached over and pretty much karate chopped their hands apart.
“Ow! Jerk!” Sam rubbed his hand as he held it close to his chest. Eileen then took the chance to bring Sam down for a hug. He rubbed her back as he softly asked her, “You okay, sweetheart?”
Jack ended up being the one explaining what had happened as Sam sat down looking through the slideshow of photos on their kid’s phone. His face getting redder as he kept on swiping but now that it’s over, and Cas was curled up beside him on the couch,  Dean could laugh at the situation. 
That is until Cas said, “We can still go on that date you planned, Sam. It would be fun.”
“No.” Dean said slowly before quickly adding, “No. No. No. No more dates.”
“Sure, Cas. It’ll be nice to catch up.”
“No!”
--
Tag List: @galaxycastiel
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prorevenge · 5 years ago
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Dispatcher refuses to send van in for maintenance. Gets forced to change my tire while I enjoy dinner on company time.
Hey all. So this is my first story on here that is squarely just a revenge. I honestly think it's a bit more pro than petty, but not really critical enough to go full nuclear, so here I am!
This story is one of how a lowly delivery driver got to royally irk a dispatcher, waste his time, get 4 hours of overtime, meal paid for, and a free beer. TL;DR below for your pleasure.
So I was a driver for a little company that rhymes with Slamazon. I had been there for several months by this point, and had developed a reputation of being very anal about vehicle maintenance. We aren't talking like washing them or whatnot, but cleaning out urine bottles, fixing broken wiper blades, installing lights to replace the burnt out ones, or other stuff that would indicate you actually remotely care for your driver's wellbeing. (Seriously guys, I had a van once with no working lights of any kind, and the passenger side door fell off its hinges right in front of my dispatchers, and they still sent me out). Needless to say, some trips were better than others, but this particular time, well, it was a doozy.
You see, friends, I was considered a problem driver by some for being obsessed with vehicles being kept road legal. I had not caused any issues other than this. We had dispatchers that were promoted up after a month, and after hitting mailboxes, cars, and other kinds of insanity, but I was always skipped over. This naturally irked me to no end, and I was looking for better within 6 months of starting. (I was there for nearly 2 years)
Naturally, all my requests for the essential equipment and urine bottle removal was denied, so I'd buy bulbs for my van, and pull them out after my route was done so I could put them into the next one the next day, and I chucked piss bottles out on the record. Kinda gross, but better than smelling it in the hot Georgia sun in the middle of summer in a van with sometimes working AC. This nonsense continued for the entirety of my time there, of course. This event however was the first of many times I decided to get back at the dispatchers for messing with my routes, and giving me the worst vans, and so on.
You see, this van had the lights that were bad. Broken AC. Shook like mad. Squeaked. Smelled like piss, and musty taco farts. Door didn't properly lock so anybody could have stole packages from it, and not much could be done. And to top this all off, 4 bad tires. Like, metal bands exposed, and one bulging out in it's death throws. The whole day, I babied this van as best I could. Putting air in the tire a few times, and just barely finished my route with some daylight to spare. So, 10 hours on the road down, and an hour and a half back to the distribution center. I get underway, and get about half way before I felt the tell tail shake of a tire going out.
"Well shit, here we go." I say to myself, and scan my surroundings. I am on the interstate, and not very far from an off ramp. So with what little tire I have left. I limp off the ramp, and to a parking lot which is right next to an Applebees (perfect luck, all things considered). I call dispatch, and give my exact location, and tell them what happened. The conversation goes as thus.
Me-Chucketbucket007, hello, again guys! Dipfuck- Dipshit dispatcher
That's it.
Me- Hey, I got a flat over here at (my location) Dipfuck- What? How? Me- Because you sent me out in a van that needed tires? Dipfuck- Fine, whatever, everyone has gone home, so you are gonna have to wait till I get there. Me- Sure. That's fine. I'll stay clocked in, then. Dipfuck- Uh-huh. You finished your route, so I don't see why you would be on the clock. Me- Because I am still in command of this vehicle, I have the keys, and if you want me to give it back, you are going to keep me on the clock.
I had called the company HR, and explained everything before I called dispatcher, and they ensured me that my time would be recorded.
Dipfuck- ...FINE, I have things to do tonight, so we gotta hurry up.
Perfect. Time to screw with this guy.
After giving him extremely vague directions while I enjoy a steak meal, and a large beer (on the clock, and no fucks given anymore) he finally finds it. I go out there, and see that he has brought the smallest, saddest, most not suitable for the task jack in the center.
Me- Well get to it, you made me leave with this van, and you can change the tire.
Dipfuck- NUH-UH, YOU WERE DRIVING IT, AND..
I interject.
Me- Drivers are not allowed, but company policy to perform repairs to the van. (He had yelled at me previously for doing this with the bulbs) only dispatch, management, maintenance, and the repair shop can repair the van.
So I walk away to finish my meal, while he tries to fix this flat with a jack barely able to lift the front of the vehicle, and needed bricks, and other items to even go high enough. In total, I wasted 4 hours of his time, cost him time to smoke up, and he missed the game that he apparently had money on. I got my meal effectively for free with the hefty overtime I got that week.
And as an extra smackdown, corporate came in, and fired the manager, assistant manager, and this particular dispatcher for failure to maintain the vehicles to DOT standards, and for mismanaging the DSP (delivery service provider) after my lovely chat with HR during the incident. I showed them the text messages, and some of the recorded audio I had taken of dispatcher being a general douchecanoe.
A week later, and we had a temp management comprised of corporate operations that would oversee the vans getting replaced with less shitty ones, training new management, and of course, giving training on what to do if you have a vehicle fail like that, and granting drivers some maintenance permissions.
TL;DR make drivers drive a van that is unfit for service, get nuked by a pissed off driver with little to lose.
(source) story by (/u/Chucketbucket007)
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artificialqueens · 4 years ago
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Tree House Kisses, Chapter 37 (Adorney) - Scorpio and Veronica
A/N: Click here for previous chapters or to read on AO3, click here! XOXO!
Chapter Summary: Courtney and Adore begin repairing their friendship, slowly but surely.
Chapter 37: I Have Confidence
“Bonnie!” Courtney flung herself into Bonnie’s arms, causing the older woman to laugh and put down the tongs, stepping away from the grill.
“Hiya darlin’, how are you?”
“I’m good now.” Courtney’s voice was soft, muffled in her hair.
“Dory told me you were coming, so I threw on a couple of veggie burgers.” Bonnie gestured to the grill.
“Aww, thank you!”
“Do you still eat cheese, or have you gone all the way to the dark side?” Bonnie held up a package of jack cheese, which she was about to put on the burgers.
“Cheese is fine,” Courtney laughed. “Although you know I’m really here for your macaroni salad.”
“Hey, Court? You wanna stop hanging on my poor mother and help me set the table?” Adore called from the other side of the patio, arms full.
“Coming!” Courtney pressed one last kiss to Bonnie’s cheek before skipping over to happily fold napkins, just as Angie came outside with a couple of serving bowls.
As she laid out the silverware, Courtney looked up at Adore, setting the condiments at one end of the table. She snatched a piece of red pepper from the veggie tray and grinned, thrilled to be here with her best friend and surrogate family on this beautiful, breezy Spring evening.
Adore smiled back, the light in her hazel eyes making Courtney’s heart nearly burst with happiness.
“Who wants toasted buns?” Bonnie called.
“I do!” Courtney exclaimed, eyes glittering with amusement at the joke she knew by now was coming.
“Well then, come sit on the grill…”
Adore and Angie both groaned, but Courtney laughed uproariously as if it was the first time she’d ever heard Bonnie’s lame joke.
“Why are you encouraging her?” Adore asked, slinging an arm around Courtney’s shoulders and guiding her towards the house to get the rest of the food.
“She’s cute. I missed her-” Courtney stopped suddenly, not wanting to kill the jovial mood, but Adore nodded.
“She missed you too,” Adore said, tossing Courtney another smile before she entered the house.
Courtney took a deep breath, grateful and happy, and then followed her inside.
-
Trinity adjusted her pillow behind her back, accidentally jostling the porch swing and Willam on the other side.
Willam had joined Trinity at her Granny's for the weekend. He never missed an opportunity to get some homemade cornbread, mac and cheese, and Granny Bonet’s Famous Peach Cobbler.
Plus Granny Bonet was sweet as pie, soft-spoken with a roaring laugh. She always seemed genuine when asking Willam what he has been up to since they last had seen each other, never making him feel any different than her own grandkids.
"Shit, Trin! Don't make me drop the weed." Willam snapped, adjusting the book on his legs.
"Sorry, sorry. This thing was stabbing me in the back," she said, finally getting the pillow in place and turning to get comfortable.
"Eh, Fuck it!" Willam shrugged, taking the half-open joint to his mouth and wrapping it closed. "If I can roll up while Violet is driving, I can fucking roll anywhere. That bitch drives like she’s playing Mario Cart."
Trinity burst into laughter, nodding her head in agreement unable to vocalize.
"I don't understand how the hell she even got her license," Willam snorted, spurred on by Trinity’s giggles.  
"It's really not that bad," Trinity said, finally trying to defend their friend.
Willam gave an incredulous look over the flame he quickly ran over the joint.
"It's more so when she's impatient," Trinity clarified.
"Oh." Willam rolled his eyes before actually lighting and taking a quick intake. “So, all the time.”
"She's gotten better recently. I think Pearl's been helping her or something," Trinity shrugged, grabbing the joint.
"Wait, what? Pearl doesn't even have a car. That's not right." Willam sat up, staring seriously at Trinity.
Trinity held his gaze, intrigued by the wheels turning in his head. What could he be thinking?
"They're having sex!" Willam finally exclaimed triumphantly.
"What? No!" Trinity’s brow furrowed.
Willam shook his head and continued, "Actually, it's pretty obvious. And right under our noses. Violet’s one sneaky bitch."
"No, no, no, no, no," Trinity coughed, deep and loud.
"Yes!"
"Do you really think Violet is over Fame though?" Trinity asked, intentionally rocking the swing as Willam took another hit.
"Well, yeah. Or...maybe. Probably. At least, she should be."
"No." Trinity shook her head adamantly. “She’s definitely not.”
"Okay, Trin. If Pearl and Violet haven't hooked up already; they will. I bet you that."
"Bet what? Because I don't even know if Pearl is really Violet's type," Trinity hesitated.
"How so?"
"Like compatibility...in bed and stuff like that. You know Violet is forward and aggressive and Pearl seems sort of nonchalant but in the ‘you can't tell me what to do’ kind of way. Violet has to be the boss, and Pearl doesn’t seem like she’d let her. Incompatible." Trinity shrugged, snatching the joint from her cousin’s hand. “Don’t forget to share, dick.”
"Hold up! And how would you know what either of them is like in bed? You’ve given this a lot of thought, cuz." Willam looked genuinely shocked and confused.
“It’s just a guess,” Trinity said, rolling her eyes. She put the joining to her lips, inhaling deeply, even as her cheeks darkened in embarrassment. “I mean, you know, it’s not like I obsess over it or anything...shut up.”
“Omigod, Trin, are you gonna start lezzing out with those whores?”
Trinity started coughing and laughing, shaking her head.
“Never say never,” she wheezed, laughing even harder at the scandalized look on his face.
-
“What’s so funny?” Roy asked, tapping on Courtney’s thigh. She was sitting next to him in the booth at Denny’s, giggling to herself over something on her phone for about the 20th time since they’d sat down. They were with April and Bob, getting a late snack after the movies, and her mind was clearly elsewhere.  
“Oh, um...sorry. Adore just sent me this-” Courtney gave a sheepish smile. “You know what, it’s not important.” She closed her phone and stuffed it into her jacket pocket.
“Well, thanks for finally joining us,” Roy said. He was going for lighthearted, but it came out a bit cross and scolding.
“Sorry, daddy,” Courtney teased, causing April to burst out laughing and Roy to make an even grumpier face. She stole a French fry off his plate, biting her lip to keep from laughing.
“I think she needs a spanking,” Bob said, and Courtney turned to stick her tongue out at him.
“You need a spanking,” she informed Bob.
“Hell yeah I do.” He cast a sly look over at April. “You wanna spank me?”
“Not especially,” April said, feigning boredom as she sipped her strawberry milkshake.
“What about you, Court?” Bob wiggled his eyebrows. “Want to teach me how to behave?”
“You’re sick,” Courtney said.
“Come on, someone must want to punish me,” Bob whined, and then yelled, “Ow!” as Roy kicked him hard under the table.
“You’re welcome,” Roy said. “Now eat your chicken fingers.”
Courtney laughed, then felt her phone buzz in her pocket, fingers itching to open it and see what Adore might have sent. She reached inside; even just touching it made her feel better. When Roy got into a heated debate with Bob over whether the Jackass crew was in fact funny, she quickly flipped it open and checked.
ADORE: LOL but can you blame me?
COURTNEY: Of course not. You’re only human.
Courtney finished sending the text, quickly putting her phone back, when she looked up and saw April gazing knowingly at her. She shrugged guiltily, pulling her root beer float over and taking a sip.
-
Once Courtney and Adore made up, play practice became about ten times as fun. They didn’t have any scenes together, so whenever one of them was on stage, the other would be cheering them on silently from the wings.
Courtney was especially supportive once the performances began—not once leaving during Adore’s big solo, ready to leap out and fight anyone who would dare upset her this year. Fortunately, the protestors stayed home. Apparently, as Mrs. Maguire thought, just the words ‘Sound of Music’ were enough to appease them. They didn’t bother watching to see the genderqueer lead, lesbian nuns, drag queen baroness or gay messenger boy mincing about.
Closing night was a bit bittersweet for Roy—after all, he’d had a starring role in every show his entire 4 years there. College would be different, and he knew that this part of his life was now officially over. Courtney hugged him tight, and Adore teasingly told him that it was okay if he wanted to cry.
“Fuck off,” he said, burying his face into Courtney’s hair.
“What, I’m serious! We’re all very impressed at this display of emotion,” Adore said.
“Yeah, it really shows how secure you are in your masculinity,” Courtney added with a wink.
“Ugh! You’re both assholes!” Roy said before he stomped off stage.
“Hmm. I guess he’s not that secure,” Adore commented, and she and Courtney both began to giggle again.  
-
As May bled into June, days getting longer and warmer, Adore began to feel antsy for summer to begin. One Saturday, she invited Courtney for an old-fashioned sleepover in the tree house, just like the good old days, and Courtney enthusiastically agreed. It was their first one in almost a year, and both girls were excited to reconnect, but maybe a bit nervous. There was still so much that they’d never said to each other. Still so much that they didn’t know how to put into words.
Adore climbed up the ladder with pizza and drinks, just as Courtney finished laying out the sleeping bags.
“Pizza delivery!”
“Ooh, yay!” Courtney exclaimed. “And um...I stole this from the liquor cabinet. Hopefully Adam won’t miss it.”
She produced a nearly full bottle of Jack Daniels, which impressed Adore, and made her send a grateful little prayer to Karen’s latest boyfriend.
“Thanks, Adam!”
Feeling like she could use a little something to help her relax, Courtney took a big swig from the bottle.
“Ugh, this is disgusting!” Courtney winced at the bitter taste, giggling.
“There's Coke too,” Adore said, and off Courtney's horrified expression, clarified, “Coca-cola, you dumbass. You can use it as a chaser.” She gestured to the white bag on top of the pizza box.
“Oh. Right.” Courtney flashed an apologetic grin and pulled a bottle of Coke from the bag, taking a sip.
Adore shook her head, chuckling, taking the bottle from her.
“Here…” She poured some of the soda out the window, then carefully replaced it with Jack, taking a sip to make sure the ratio was right before adding a little more alcohol. “Perfect.”
“Ugh, Adore!” Courtney opened the pizza box, groaning. “There’s pepperoni all over it!”
“Oh shit.”
“Gross…”
“Sorry!” Adore said, explaining, “I haven’t been hanging out with a lot of vegetarians lately, I forgot. Here, I’ll eat the pepperoni off for you.”
“Then there will still be pepperoni juice,” Courtney whined.
“You’re such a pain in the ass. Pepperoni is barely an animal. I don’t even know what animal it is!”
“Yeah. Don’t you think that’s a problem?” She pushed the pizza aside and dug into the bag of cheesy bread instead.
“Well. Sorry,” Adore said again, and Courtney leaned back, giving her a smile before taking another swig of Jack and Coke.
“It’s cool, I can eat this.”
-
“So…” Adore traced the edge of the sleeping bag with her finger, by now a bit sleepy and rocking a healthy buzz, finding herself realizing again just how much she’d missed her best friend. She felt bad, wished she could take back all the months of silence. But instead, she settled for trying her best to find out how her life was going these days. “...How are things with Roy?”
“Good. Great, actually,” Courtney sighed. “He’s the best.”
“He really loves you a lot,” Adore said, the memory of their argument a few weeks back still fresh in her mind. How Roy was the one who, in spite of everything, got her to make up with Courtney—and all because he wanted his girlfriend to be happy. It was disgustingly sweet, actually.
“Yeah. It’s gonna be so weird when he’s gone next year…” Courtney said.
“Oh, right. Shit. How’re you gonna survive?” They’d been joined at the hip for so long now that Adore couldn’t imagine what school—or life—would be like for Courtney without him.
“I’ll manage,” Courtney said, rolling over onto her side. “Anyway, he’s going to UCLA, so he’s only gonna be a few hours away. I’ll probably still see him all the time.”
“That’s cool.” Adore took another sip of their makeshift cocktail, swallowing down her residual bitterness about Roy and Courtney’s perfect teen romance along with the whiskey.  
“What about you. Any...special girls I should know about?” Courtney asked carefully. She took the bottle from Adore’s hands.
“Special girls? Okay mom.”
“Shut up, you know what I mean! Anyone who-”
“Nah.” Adore shook her head slowly.
“Do you and Violet still ever-”
“No,” Adore said, not even letting her get out the question. “We both realized that it was super toxic, and we’re much better off as friends. And this time, it feels like it’s stuck.”
“And Pearl?”
“Pearl?” Adore furrowed her brow, shaking her head. She and Pearl were still in that weird place where things were almost flirty but not. And she was still the only one who knew the whole truth about what happened with Courtney. It was too hard to explain, so instead she just said, “No. Although she has been really great this year. You know...with everything.”
Courtney took another sip, nearly polishing off the bottle, and Adore crawled over to make a new one.
“Can I ask you something?”
“Go ahead.” Adore once again poured the Coke out the window—this time maybe a bit more, and then replaced the contents with Jack.  
It was a few moments before Courtney spoke again. She appeared to be collecting her thoughts.
“How did you know that you were gay? Or...when…did you start thinking about it?”
Adore turned around, head tilted.
“Where’d this come from?”
“I’m just curious. You never really talked to me about it.” Courtney held a pillow in her arms, hair falling across her eyes.
Adore considered what to say, how honest to actually be in this moment, deciding that a few lies of omission were probably the best idea for everyone.
“I guess I always sort felt a little...different. And then when Violet started tutoring me, she kind of guessed? And she made me feel like...I don’t know. It was normal. Or at least, okay.”
“Of course it’s okay,” Courtney assured her, then asked, “So...was she the first girl you ever...had feelings for?”
Adore’s tongue felt thick in her mouth. She didn’t want to lie, not tonight when they were supposed to be bonding. But on the other hand, they’d only recently found their way back to each other, and what if she destroyed their delicate new reality? She didn’t think she could bear another fight, another period of loneliness like she’d had this year.
“Um...I guess I had little crushes before, but nothing that ever...went anywhere,” Adore finally said. Which was true.
“Oh yeah? Like who?” It was a fair question. A casual question. Her best friend showing interest in the inner workings of her heart.
“Uh…” Adore racked her brain for an answer that would satisfy her. “Remember that counselor we had at drama camp? Asia?”
Courtney did remember—she was a pretty Black girl with a dazzling smile, funny and lively but always sure to keep them in line.
“Oh yeah. She was cute,” Courtney nodded approvingly.
“And of course, um...Shakira.”
“Of course.” Courtney giggled, then bit her lip. “Anyone else?”
“Oh! Remember that girl who worked at Video Village? With the pink hair and all the piercings?” Adore grinned slyly, starting to have fun with this walk down memory lane.
“Her?!” This one, Courtney didn’t seem to appreciate, but Adore just shrugged.  
“Yeah! She was hot.”
Courtney took another thoughtful sip from the bottle before asking, “Have you ever liked a boy?”
“I used to try to make myself like boys,” Adore said. “Or, imagine that I did. But it was always just some dumb pop star or something. Like...remember Ashley Parker Angel?”
“No. Who?!” Courtney looked utterly confused, brow furrowed.
“The blond from O-Town.”
“O-Town!” Courtney giggled gleefully, a hiccup escaping her as she passed the bottle back to Adore. “Omigod. You had their picture on your binder and no one could figure out why.”
“Yeah, I know. Their music was terrible,” Adore admitted.
“They made music?”
Adore laughed, shaking her head.  
“And god, even my fake crushes were dudes with girl names…”
This made Courtney giggle some more, holding her pillow tighter. Her eyes drifted shut for a moment.
“What about you?” Adore asked.
Courtney’s eyes popped back open.
“What about me?”
“You ever like a girl?” Adore teased, poking her in the ribs. Fully expecting her to squeal in disgust, or burst out laughing.
But instead, Courtney looked back at her and said, “Besides you?”
Adore stared back at her for a long, heated moment. A million thoughts swirled in her head, but none so strong as the realization that Courtney was just fucking around, making her pay for her teasing. Adore started to laugh, shaking her head.
“Good one, bitch.”
Overcome with an impulse she couldn’t ignore, Courtney leaned forward and pressed her lips to Adore’s. And for a moment, it was perfect—Adore’s soft lips against hers, breath sweet and smoky from the drinks. And then Courtney felt a hand on her shoulder, shoving her backward.
Courtney clapped a hand over her mouth. What was wrong with her? This was exactly how she’d fucked things up last time. Her cheeks blazed red.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean-”
“I know,” Adore said hoarsely.
Courtney’s eyes filled with tears, terrified that this time, she’d fucked up for good.
“Are you mad?” she whispered.
“No.” Adore shook her head, giving a wry smile and reaching forward to pry the bottle from her fingers. “But you’ve probably had enough of this.”
Courtney let out a relieved chuckle, tension leaving her body as she laid back down against the bean bag chair. Things were okay; they were still friends and everything was back to normal. Or at least, as normal as possible.
“Dory?”
“Yeah?”
“Will you snuggle with me?” she asked, voice soft and tentative.
Adore turned to her friend, giving a gentle nod, saying “Of course,” before curling up beside her.
For a second, as she breathed in, Adore realized that Courtney must have switched shampoos. The scent of her hair was different, and the unfamiliarity of it gave Adore a strange pang of sadness.
But then, as they settled in some more, Adore realized that lingering beneath the surface was something she knew very well, something innately her that would never go away, no matter what perfumes she might use. And that, the sameness, was enough to make her smile to herself, arms wrapping tightly around Courtney as she pulled her in close.
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mickmarstookmyheart · 5 years ago
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I'm on my way (a whump drabble)
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Summary: The father of your unborn child, Mick Mars has finally the last concert of the tour and is eager to come home. You spend most of your time at his parents' house but when you are driving home an unexpected thing happens.
Being a wife to a rock star was never easy. Constant tours and albums and hardly any free time during them. But you exactly knew what you will face when you and Mick married. You have known each other since the Theatre of Pain tour when the Crüe went into a bar you actually worked in and you all meet there.
After dating for months you left your workplace and followed the boys on the tour. Then you got pregnant. In your 5th month Mick sent you home and didn't let you continuing the shows with them. He asked his parents to take care of you when he was not at home. Now you had a pretty big belly and was nearly in your 8th month.
"Eat more, honey, you look skinny." Tina, Mick's mother was really nice and helpful, and was your mother instead of the real one. She cooked for you and gave you several pieces of advice about raising a child. She told you many interesting and funny stories about little Mick and about her sister, Susie, she even showed you pictures.
"No, thank you. I have already eaten instead of two and I don't want to eat up your food." You leant back on the chair and rubbed your stomach with your hands sighing. Your little warrior was quite a wild one, he constantly let you know that he is such eager to come like his father did.
"Yo, Mick are you ready?" Vince yelled after knocking on the door. The guitarist was sitting in the changing room and waited for the concert to start. However he still had to call you before the show since he promised it. He went as quickly as his back let him to a phone booth and dialed his parents' home number. After a couple of minutes you picked it up.
"Hello, (Y/N)!"
"Hi Mick!" You mumbled in the phone since food coma hit you.
"Are you okay?" He asked worryingly immediately after he heard your voice.
"Of course. I'm okay. We are okay." You smiled and looked down on your belly. You felt your son kick and giggled. "Yes, it's daddy. It's your Dad speaking." You murmured.
"How is my little warrior?" He was smiling from ear-to-ear just hearing your voice, though he would be happier if he could see you. Finally it was the last concert of the tour and he was eager to arrive home sweet home to meet his beloved and his son.
"He is quite active lately. I'm pretty sure he will be a boxer or something. Or..." You were grinning from the thought.
"Or what?"
"A musician! Whenever I'm listening to music this little guy starts to dance like Michael Jackson." Mick sighed thinking maybe it's not the best idea for his son to follow his father's steps. One musician is more than enough in one family.
"We will see. Anyway Vince and the boys are sending hellos and big hugs for you. They say we will celebrate the birth of our son like no else has done before. I'm kinda scared if you ask me." He rubbed the back of head while playing several scenarios in his head how bad the party could be.
"Don't worry, I won't let them do any harmful things and I'm sure they will be the best uncles. They will love this boy to the moon and back."
"I hope so. Now I have to go but tomorrow we are heading back so we will soon see each other. I love you (Y/N)."
"We love you, too." You hung up the phone and headed to the couch to rest a bit before going back to your home to prepare everything for Mick's arrival.  As you sat down you looked out of the window and saw that it was already darkening.
"Are you sure you don't want to stay and sleep here?" Tina asked trying pursuade you not to drive home in the dark.
"Yeah, I'm sure. I want everything to be nice and ready when Mick arrives." You stated and started to pack your stuff.
"If you insist. Then I will pack you some food and ask Frank to bring it to your car." You placed a small kiss on her cheek, thanking her all the things she has already done for you. After saying goodbyes to Tina and Frank you got in the car and fasten your seatbelts and adjusted it not to bother your huge belly. You turn on the radio and set off from the driveway. It was pitch out there but luckily there wasn't so much car on the road. You hummed  along the song which was played and drummed on the wheel to the beat. Your eyes widened when you saw that a car was in your lines from the opposite direction. You honked but you exactly knew it won't help at all. You tried to turn the wheel away as fast as possible but other car hit yours hard. You heard the screeching of the tires and then a big bang. Your head was pounding and you lost your consciousness immediately.
"It was hell of a concert, man!" Nikki yelled as they walked down stage. His terror twin agreed as he patted Nikki's back.
"It was pretty wild, dude! Vinnie, what are you doing after this?" Vince turned around started walking backwards to be face-to-face to the drummer. He was grinning like a mad man and was laughing.
"Oh man. Didn't you see how many chicks wanted to get me?" He asked snickering. Mick just rolled his eyes and hoped his band mates won't do anything that could ruin their way back home.
"You got me there, dude." Tommy said while pointing at the singer. "And you Mick?"
"Being away from you." He muttered and tried not run away from these idiots.
"You already hyped up to see (Y/N) right?" Nikki asked while opening a bottle of Jack Daniel's when they arrived in the changing room. Mick nodded and sat down hissing from the pain his back was giving him.
"Oh man, I miss (Y/N) so much. I haven't annoy her in 4 months." Vince pouted.
"We will have the biggest party when (Y/N) and little dude comes home." Tommy cheered before Doc stormed in the room and was gasping for air. The boys looked at him questioning when he walked over to Mick.
"What is it, Doc? He asked their manager.
"You have to come to the TV. NOW!" They got up fast and followed Doc in the hallway. Many people were already there staring at the screen.
"Car crash on the motorway. We barely know anything about the condition of the drivers, the only thing we know that in the car which was driving in the wrong lane was completely wrecked and the passengers are wounded seriously. In the other car there was..." Mick heart skipped the beat when he recognized (Y/N)'s jet black car in the middle of the road. "We just got the news that the victim is the wife of the famous guitar player Mick Mars. She was critically injured but that's all we know right know. I will report the news as soon as we know something."
Mick quickly left the room and headed towards to the plane when Vince came running behind him.
"Mick wait!" He panted trying to catch his breath. Nikki and Tommy arrived soon and was walking next to the determined and shocked guitarist. "Mick stop! Listen here..."
"You don't have to come if don't want to. It's about my family so it's none of your business." Mick continued his way down the hall.
"What, no way man! We are coming with ya. Mötley Crüe is a family and we are stuck together no matter what." Nikki said and grabbed Mick's shoulder who sighed and smiled.
"Then come on let's go."
Even with the plane it was still two damn hours to get back to the city. Mick couldn't stop thinking about his wife and little boy. "I'm on my way, baby, just hold on." He whispered to himself looking out of the window. He constantly stomped his feet and was biting his lips worryingly. He couldn't eat a thing since the news and he wasn't even hungry. The boys were looking at him with sadness in their eyes, too. They loved (Y/N) more than anything and would give everything to save her.
After getting to the hospital Mick recognized his parents in the corridor. They got up in the moment they saw their son.
"Oh Robert, I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have let go alone. It's my fault." Mick sighed and hugged his mother strongly and was rubbing her back.
"Shh mom. It's not your fault at all. It was an accident. Believe me it wasn't you, okay?" He draw back and looked in her eyes making sure she didn't blame herself. His dad also hugged him and smiled sadly down at his frightened son. "Do we know anything about her?"
"No, they haven't told us anything. They told us to wait here, but it was like ages." Tina sat back and was playing with her scarf in her hand. Mick told his bandmates to go home, he will call them if he knows anything so they could come to visit you.
They were sitting in the hall for minutes when a nurse approached them.
"Mr Mars?" She asked not looking up the papers she was reading.
"Yes. How is she?"
"She was unconscious when she was brought in and she has many broken bones but apart from that she is lucky."
"And how is our son?" Mick was worried sick since the nurse haven't said a word about him.
"Well, since your wife was in the 8th month we thought it would be the best idea to operate your son from her. The surgery went well and they are both recovering now. Your son alive and he is healthy although he is in an incubator and you can only see him behind a window." Mick let out a long breath which he wasn't aware he was holding. He never felt so relieved before. His parents were also glad and followed the nurse to their newly born grandson.
"There he is in the middle." The nurse pointed on the bed and walked away after telling where was your room.
"Oh, Robert he is such a beautiful boy." Tina was trying to adore him through her now wet eyes.
"He got your eyes, son." Frank added as he glanced at Mick who couldn't took his eyes off his son. He felt he was luckiest guy on the Earth and couldn't believe that he is married to such a talented and perfect lady like you. After he was managed to think other than his son he told his parents to stay there until he is visiting you. He hesitated first before exiting the dark room but he silently stepped in and closed the door behind himself. He sat down a took a look at you. Your brown hair was still covered in blood just as your beautiful face. Mick leant closer and took your hand is his and placed a soft kiss on it.
"I will never let you go, (Y/N). Did you hear me? You won't get rid of me this easily." He promised to himself.
Two weeks later
"I can't believe I can finally sleep in my own bed now." You said while getting out of the car. You cautiously stretched your back before getting your son from the car. Mick stood next to you and waved you away.
"I will bring him in, babe." He said after kissing you on the lips.
"Thank you." You picked up your staff and opened the big door. When you stepped in you almost had a heart attack. All the boys and many people jumped in front of you cheering. Somebody switched the lights on and you can see the all the decoration and presents in the room.
"Guys, how..how?" You were looking for the right words from the shock, joy and happiness, you couldn't really decide.
"We told you we will throw the biggest party when you come home." Tommy yelled before giving you a big hug. You hissed from the pain but you didn't care anymore. You were with your family and that was the only thing that mattered.
tags:  @cmft-jr-winchester​ @leatherandheels​
This idea came up last night and I didn't want to insert in my other story so here it is.
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leahxx129 · 5 years ago
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The Last Descendant (Sam Winchester x Reader) pt.5/Final Chapter
Disclaimer: Tumblr is being weird again so if you’re using the app, the ‘Keep Reading’ cut off line may not be visible inspite of the fact that I always insert one.
Hi everyone! I originally planned on posting this on Friday but your girl is a busy bee and had some personal stuff to take care of. Nonetheless, I hope you enjoy the final part to this story, I had lots of fun writing it.
Summary to pt.5: You’ve managed to win a battle against Michael in the woods, but the war is not over just yet. He’s powerful - more than anyone you’ve ever encountered - but you also have some aces up your sleeve.  
Warnings: slight cursing, character death
Word count: 2.140-ish
PART 1.  PART 2.  PART 3.  PART 4.
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As the angels have disappeared, the force holding you flat against the trees dissipates, causing you all to fall to your knees. The first thing you realize when you get up is that there’s only three of you left – Kaia’s taken off without prior notice. Your blood runs cold for a minute but then you find the spear in the tall grass where you threw it. Sam makes sure everyone is well enough to travel and following Jody’s suggestion, you drive to her place.
It’s already dark when you pull up in her driveway. Neither you nor Sam have said a single word throughout the ride and as the engine dies, you feel an urge to change this.
“Sam...” you put a hand on his thigh “I’m gonna do everything I can in order to replicate the spear and we’ll get him back, okay? I promise.”
He puts his large one over yours and squeezes it.
“I know, Y/N. Now, let’s get inside and take a look at your wound.”
The interior of Jody’s house reminds you of your childhood home, and a sense of nostalgia washes over you, mixed with hope that one day even you can have something like this. Maybe with Sam. Who knows?
“Alright, the guest room is ready.” Jody informs you, pulling you out of your thoughts. “A bathroom opens directly from it, clean towels can be found in the cabinet. And if you’re hungry there’s food in the fridge, knock yourself out.”
“Thanks, Jody.”
“As for you, Sam, I’m sorry, but I don’t have any more guest rooms, so you’re stuck with the couch.” she pouts.
“It’s okay, uhm, we’re kind of used to sleeping together.” Sam flashes an awkward smile.
Jody appears startled for a second but soon regaines composure.
“In that case, excuse me for a second. I need to prepare another set of pillows in the guest room.”
When everything’s all set you decide to scrub off the combination of dirt, blood and sweat that’s defiling your body. Usually you shower with an almost boiling hot water, but this time you must settle for medium temperature as the scars and bruises don’t really appreciate the heat. You nearly punch Sam in the face when he pulls the floral shower curtain open, but realizing it’s him, you’re able to stop yourself in time.
“God, Sam, do not do that again! I ain’t the screaming kind of scared, I’m the might-break-your-nose kind of scared.”
“Noted!” he smiles, stepping into the bathtub.
You don’t question what he’s doing in there with you. Maybe for the first time ever in your life, you let someone else take control of a situation, and to much of your surprise, you discover it’s not that bad. He gently cleanses every inch of your body, with special attention to the scars.
“You know, I really think your shoulder could use a couple of stitches.” he whispers. You can hear a little worry in his tone.
“Nah, I’ve had worse I didn’t patch up and I’m still around.” you reply, swiping aside a wet strand of hair that was sticking to his forehead and you kiss him softly.
When you’re all finished, you dress up in the clothes Jody left you on the foot of the bed and pick up the spear from the corner of the room.
“Whoah, what are you doing?” Sam asks incredulously.
“Well, what does it look like I’m doing?” he opens his mouth to speak but you continue “You know what, don’t answer that. I’m gonna go to the garage and try to replicate this.”
“No, you’re not. Look, sweetheart, let’s be sensible here. You haven’t slept in a long time and I can assure you that the world’s not gonna end in those few hours when you do. I talked to Cas and he was able to track down Michael in Missouri. If anything happens, we’ll know firsthand. You need to be strong both mentally and phyisically to do what you’re about to… you know I’m right, so don’t fight it!” he delivers a lecture while taking the weapon out of your hand.
You pull a face but give in to his reasoning anyway. This time you manage to get three full hours of sleep before the nightmares start tainting your subconscious. Terrifying images you haven’t seen in a long time flood your mind, and you successfully wake the whole house up with your screams. You can hear Sam’s soothing vocie and Jody’s nervous inquiries about your well-being before you fully come around.
“I’m…I’m alright. I’m fine, really.” you stutter unconvincingly while running a hand through your hair. “Uhm, Jody?”
“Yeah?”
“Could you please show me your garage? I’ll collect the tools from Sam’s car and get right down to work.”
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The weapon contains an ancient magic you’ve never encountered before, or even anything similar to it. The runes carved into the shaft belong to a language uknown to you, making your job all the more difficult.  Nevertheless, you try your best, as always. First, you recreate the shape of the spear and its head, then join the two together. Replicating the runes requires the most time – you only realize just how much when the first lights of morning illuminate the garage and Sam brings you breakfast. You take a few bites of your toast and drink your coffee in one gulp.
“Okay, so here goes everything…” you mutter as you begin performing a spell, which should transfer some of the magic from the original weapon into the replica. The incantation you recite next supposedly enhances the transferred magic.
“It looks like the same to me.” Sam states when you show them your work.
“Yeah, and it also possesses that creepy vibe the original one does.” Jody nods in agreement.
“Good. Hopefully, it’ll work just as well, too. Let’s visit Missouri and kick some archangel ass, shall we?” you propose.
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You must give it to Michael – he has exceptionally good taste. Both the exterior and interior of the building he chose as temporary residence radiates elegance. You meet up with Cas and a boy in the underground parking lot. You furrow your brows.
“Who’s the kid?” you glance between Sam and the angel, the latter moving infront of the boy as you speak.
“Uhm, his name is Jack. Also, he happens to be the son of satan.” Cas replies.
Out of reflex, you touch the side of your overknee boots looking for your knife but ease off almost immediately and extend an arm towards the boy. Cas eyes you with suspicion.
“Don’t worry, Castiel, I’m not gonna attcak him.”
He seems hesitant but eventually steps aside, allowing you to shake Jack’s hand.
“I’m Y/N. Y/N Colt.”
His eyes widen.
“Colt? Are you related to Samuel Colt?” your nod sends him over the edge “Oh, wow! This is soo cool! I’m Jack! You must have some awesome stories to tell! When this is over, could you tell me all of them?”
“I’d absolutely love to, Jack!” you smile at his child-like enthusiasm, doubting that a sweet kid like him could be related to the Devil himself.
“Alright, I think we should go over the plan one more time.” Sam changes the subject.
You talk everything over one last time - including the intel on the monsters Sam got from a friend named Garth - and enter the elevator that takes you to the top floor. You feel like the tension could be cut with a knife.
An empty, silent hall welcomes you as you exit.
“Michael is the only one I can sense.” Cas whispers.
“I’m not sure if that’s a good thing.” you whisper back.
You all take feather light steps until you reach a double-winged door and Cas nods, confirming the archangel’s location. Sam kicks in the door in a blink of an eye. A well-dressed Michael is staring out the window, holding a glass of some probably expensive booze.
“Welcome!” he greets, turning to your direction. “Well, well, well… what do we have here? The Three Muskateers? If so, I have to admit, Y/N, you are the loveliest d’Artagnan I have ever laid my eyes upon.”
“Oh my God, just cut the crap or else I’m gonna vomit!” the words slip out before you could think them through.
As a result, Michael’s face hardens even more and he extends an arm in the height where your neck would be, casting an invisible force that pulls you straight into his grip.
Sam yells out your name in desperation.
“Oh, don’t worry, Samuel. I am not going to snap her pretty little neck. Although, my fingers may leave a bruise.” Michael exclaims innocently then averts his gaze back to you.
You find it hard not to try stripping his fingers from your neck with both hands, but there’s no other way. One hand is on his but with the other one you sign three behind your back – the catcher singal for a slider in baseball. Sam catches on, takes the spear out of Castiel’s trenchcoat and throws it to you. But before you could sink the tip in Michael’s body, he snatches the weapon and breaks it in half with one hand.
“Did you honestly believe it was going to be that easy to take me down?” he asks with utter disbelief. “The way you underestimate me is quite offensive.”
“Let her go, Michael.” Jack speaks up.
“I don’t think so, child. In fact, here’s what’s going to happen!” he looks right into your eyes “I am going to kill all of them – in which order, that’s your call – and then I will release my monster army on this city with you by my side. I think this vessel is handsome enough, you’ll grow used to him, darling.”
“Yeah, he may be handsome… but I kinda have a thing for his brother, asshole!”
Before he can react, you stab him in the chest with the knife from your boots. He looks down at the shaft smiling but it soon fades into an expression of sheer panic. He lets go of you and tries to pull the weapon out.
“Did you honestly believe we didn’t have a plan B? The way you underestimate us is quite offensive...” you retort.
“What’s happening?! I demand to know!” he bellows, confused.
“I upgraded my favorite blade a little. Now it has the magic of the spear from that other dimension, too. You like it?”
He screams out in agony while his whole body is lighting up with a blue-ish white blaze. You take a couple of steps back and bump into Sam, who envelopes you in a shielding embrace. Cas and Jack try to cover their eyes as the brightness has risen to an extent that’s almost blinding. Michael’s shrieking finally dies out with a huge energy explosion that busts out all the windows in the suite.
He is gone and the only thing he left behind is a very much so bleeding Dean Winchester on the floor.
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Dean is slowly opening his eyes. The fluorescent neon lights, the white walls and the beeping of machines tip him off regarding his whereabouts – he’s in a hospital. He tries to rip the needle out of his arm, but Sam prevents him from doing so.
“Hey, no! Stop!”
“Sam? Wha- what happened? Where am I?”
“Uhm, long story short, Y/N killed Michael and injured you in the process, so you are in a private clinic in Missouri.”
“Private clinic? You know damn well we can’t afford that stuff!”
“You may not be able to, but I can.” you appear in the door with two cups of coffee, one of which you hand to Sam while sitting down on a chair next to him.
“Uhm, we appreciate the offer, really, but we can’t accept it.” Dean says in protest without a beat.
“Hey… I almost killed you, I believe this is the least I can do.”
There’s a stare-down between the brothers and Dean’s the one to break the connection first.
“Alright, thank you.” he mumbles eventually, then checks his bandage by looking down the inside of his hospital robe.
“Uhm, question. Based on the place of the wound, how am I not dead right now?”
“Well, I know how to stab someone without killing them... Which is probably the weirdest thing I’ve ever said to anyone, so let’s pretend it never left my mouth, please.”
Both men chuckle lightly, and you feel a little heat rise to your cheeks.
“Hot, feisty and funny? Sam, you better not mess this up or I’ll snatch her right out of your hands.” Dean comments jokingly and this time, it’s your turn to laugh and Sam’s to blush.
“Don’t worry about that, Dean…” he intertwines his fingers with yours “I won’t. I kinda have a thing for her…”
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vydante · 6 years ago
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Restart | Avengers x Male! Reader | 4
Fandom: Marvel
Pairing: Avengers x Male! Reader (romantically: undecided)
Plot: Dr. Strange said there was only one possibility of winning the battle against Thanos. 
But when (Name) is forced into the past and into his younger body, he’s suddenly given the chance to start over and prevent the future from happening again.
So which route are you going to take? Are you going to risk the future and take preventative measures, or live life with the Avengers for the next 4 years, knowing what will soon come?
A/N: Long. Includes Endgame Spoilers.
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“We have a lead on recent H.Y.D.R.A. activities. Normally, they’d send two or three of us, but from what we’ve heard this one might be bigger than we think."
You weren’t looking at Steve but instead at the information in front of you. You were all sat in the quinjet while Nat was flying it. They'd usually take turns and sometimes they'd let you pilot it, despite the fact that you didn't even have a drivers permit yet. You either walked, flew, or had someone drive you to where you needed to be. Though truth be told, even if you weren't secretly a nearly 30-year old adult in a teenagers body, you knew how to drive anyways.
You were next to your dad, who was also looking at the information. And while all of them were discussing what the mission was, you were busy thinking.
‘H.Y.D.R.A.?’
You hadn’t heard of that name in a while. While you were more than confident that the group was still up and running in your original timeline, you had stopped joining all missions regarding H.Y.D.R.A. You left that to the government and lived your life as peaceful as can be. 
But now that you were reminded of H.Y.D.R.A., you remember that S.H.I.E.L.D. had been infiltrated by the enemy group. That caused an uproar among the United Nations. Because of that, it was one of the reasons why Steve was so against the government taking control over the Avengers.
You furrowed your eyebrows.
What should you do with that information? Should you take that up with Director Fury? Would he even believe you? Perhaps you should go to Strange. He’d probably know what you should do; he probably already knows that his timeline’s been jacked. 
But… If your sense of time is correct, then chances are Strange isn’t even here yet- at least, with the wisdom of the temple folks and time stone. Perhaps there's someone else who holds that wisdom? After all, Strange had to get it from somewhere.
But what if they didn't want to help you? Then should you just remain silent as H.Y.D.R.A. quietly steered S.H.I.E.L.D.’s head in their goals?
Your head snapped forward when you heard Tony call your name.
“(Name)!”
You glanced at him.
“Yeah?”
“You listening?”
You nodded and stood up. You positioned yourself over the map on display and cleared your throat.
“So, Hulk and Thor tank the front line while Black Widow and Hawkeye flank the rear. Captain, Iron Man and I head into the building and take care of each floor, hall, section, whatever. One of the floors holds the files we need, and if our information is right, then it's not on the first 4 floors. As far as we know, there’s more than a few hundred enemies, soldiers, and non-soldiers alike. No civilians in a 130-mile radius. Anything I miss?”
After your mess up with Tony a few days ago, you made an effort to remember all of the missions from then on, which going on these missions helps with jogging back your memory. This one was easy to remember; Steve chewed you out for not paying attention when you were in the quinjet and you had been pissy for a while afterward. 
You even stole and hid his shield, much to everyone's annoyance when the next mission came around.
You glanced at the rest of your teammates as you finished your recap of what you assumed Steve said. They were silent and looked at each other.
Steve coughs into his fists and looks at everyone else except for you. 
“Well, I couldn’t have worded it any better.”
You mentally cursed. Steve didn’t say anything about the plan. Shit.
Natasha walked up to you and patted your bicep.
“Well said. Boys, we’re approaching the enemy base.”
Steve nodded. You all positioned yourself as the quinjet lowered itself onto the ground. If your memory serves you right, you should know what you should be doing. This should be easy. Your helmet snapped over your face and you stood there silently. 
The entrance opened and you were greeted with the fresh patch of snow and silence.
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You will admit, the nano-tech suit spoiled you silly. It was, by far, the best damn suit that you had ever made and now that you were without it, you had to hulk around in this bulky suit. You grumble quietly.
There were no extra thrusters, barely any heating, and barely any stabilizers, so you were constantly shaking around as you flew. No extra cannons, no armor regeneration, no nothing. And it made you put making a secret nanotech suit on the top priority of your list. 
You knew you’d have to make a greater effort to conceal it. But since all you need was a housing unit for the nanotech- your dad preferred the one over his chest while you went for one around your neck- you’d just have to adapt for now. Maybe you’ll make the base as a watch, or something.
Reminiscent of your dad’s nanotech prototype. 
But for now, you’ll just have to deal with this clunky iron maiden suit. You were lurking around the corner, having already breached the first few stories, and watched as Steve was on the opposite corner from you. Your dad was watching out for any stragglers on the lower floors. Outside were sounds of screaming and gunshots, and the thunder from Thor's hammer. Chances are, Hulk and Thor probably burst through their 2nd line of defense by now. 
“Apex, you read me?”
That sounded so unfamiliar coming from Steve’s mouth. He hadn’t called you that ever since you disowned that nickname. And even now, you remembered that he'd sometimes slip up and calls you by your name.
“Yeah.”
You glanced over at him. He sent you a hard look and nodded over to his left. You glanced over and saw a staircase. While everyone in the building had already gone out to see the commotion, some had stayed and lingered behind. As far as you could tell, there were around, what, 30 plus? Not too bad, considering you and Steve were there, but it’d be a hassle nonetheless. 
You heard your dad speak over the comms.
“Cap, Iron Kid, I’m heading up.”
Your lips quirked upwards at the nickname. And in true fashion, you heard the faint sounds of his blasters powering up.
‘Weee…! Weee…!’
They were such ugly sounds. Funny, but… You were just glad the noise got upgraded.
Lord knows the number of memes and edits people tagged you in on social media.
Thankfully the guys still around were too busy yelling to notice your dad living it up on the lower level. It all stopped. You raised an eyebrow at Steve, who only sighed.
“So, what’d I miss?”
You jumped and glared at your dad, or as best as you could with the helmet covering your face. He was crouched down in a similar position to you. You saw your dad’s face pop up on your U.I., and rolled your eyes at his smug face. You turned around and mumbled into the comms.
“Not much. Around 30 or so guys. A bunch is armed. There's a staircase across the room.”
Your dad nodded. Clint spoke up in the comms.
“Hey, we’re gonna need you guys to hurry it up there. Not sure if the other two are gonna join us back here, but if he isn’t then we don’t have that much time left.”
In the back was a bunch of gunshots, echoing the ones you just heard then and there. You met eyes with Steve and he nodded.
“Apex, you head straight for the staircase and go up. Iron Man and I will take care of the rest. Files should be straight ahead. Get it, get out. No horseplaying. On the count of three."
"One."
Tony squatted and prepared his blasters. His face disappeared from your unit hub when you glanced at your U.I.
'Thruster Percent: 89...'
"Two."
Steve readied his shield. He nodded and leaned forwards. You got into position as your U.I. was blinking red.
'Thruster Percent: 97...'
"Three!"
You shot off immediately. The enemies head had turned in your direction, but all they saw was what they thought was Iron Man flying by them and to the staircase.
"Shit, stop hi-!"
Steve threw his shield at him and swung at another soldier. One aimed at him with his gun but was knocked back by Tony. He grunted. 
"On your left!"
Steve knocked his elbow back, colliding it into an enemy's face. His shield magnetically attached itself back on his arm as he deflected oncoming bullets. Steve rolled his shoulders as he stared directly into the barrel of a gun.
"I can do this all day."
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You were still hovering above the floor as you made your way through the building. Strangely enough, each floor before was loud and filled with people. But the door leading from the staircase was locked from the outside, so it made sense that the floor was silent. The only noise you heard was either from the outside or from the floors below you.
You flew through a few floors until you reached what seemed to be the last one. You blew the hatch open and cautiously walked in, your thrusters out and ready. The screens were off, but you didn't want to trigger anything by turning them on; for now, you left them alone. 
You settled down onto the ground as you carefully scanned the area. As far as you could tell, your signals weren't picking anything up. Though, that didn't mean that pit in your stomach lessoned any bit.
Something felt off.
"Hn, I don't like this..." You muttered quietly to yourself.
You carefully searched all of the tables and cabinets but it wasn't until you were deep into the floor did you finally catch a break.
"Sir, on your 5," J.A.R.V.I.S.' voice spoke up quietly.
Your eyes scanned to your right. 
There was a table next to you that was stacked with paperwork. You carefully approached it. You shuffled through them and scanned each one.
No, no, wrong one, no, no...
Aha.
In your hands, you held a hefty and beaten folder. There was no label, but searching through its contents you founded exactly what you needed.
You held it with a vice grip and prepared your thrusters to break through the ceiling. You got what you needed, and now was the time to dip. But in the corner of your eyes, you spotted a coffee cup.
It was still steaming.
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While it wasn't the toughest thing, beating a group of 30 plus people was a bit of a hassle for the two superheroes. Steve was barely breaking a sweat as he picked his shield back up. He glanced around as all he saw was the beaten bodies lying still. Some were struggling to get back up, but Steve just hit them with his shield and they were down for the count. 
While they were done here, judging by the sounds of gunshots and screaming from outside, the others were still busy.
Steve glanced around the room.
"Iron Man?"
"Over here."
Steve turned to see where he was, and Tony was holding up an enemy by his shirt. He looked bloody and bruised, and it was clear that he wasn't going to stay conscious for long. But what bothered Steve was that he had an expression on his face that only said one thing.
Victory.
"What're are you smiling for, soldier?"
Steve spoke up and approached him with his shield in hand. He squared up to the soldier, but he didn't seem the littlest bit intimidated by the super soldier.
The soldier smirked and chucked, but coughed up blood.
"You... You think you've w-won..."
Steve couldn't see Tony's expression, but he could tell that he was rolling his eyes.
"And why is that?"
His eyes were glazed, and Tony wasn't sure if he was looking at him or not. Either way, he didn't like his expression.
"Those gunshots..."
He chuckled quietly. His nose was bleeding by now. Tony listened closely to those gunshots and Steve's eyes widened, his stomach dropping to the floor. The soldier shakingly holds up a finger and points it to the ceiling.
Now that Tony thinks about it, they're a lot closer than they were before. There was thudding, and a sound that rang familiar with Tony too well.
'Wee...!'
"... Where do you think they're coming from?"
Tony finally realized it. He shot his thrusters in the soldier's face and knocked him back to the wall. Steve was already in a full blown sprint to the staircase. Tony shot his thrusters and raced towards the upper floors.
"(Name)!"
Tony called out to you through the comms, but he only heard nothing. You didn't reply back, and that sent slight waves of panic through his skin.
What if something had happened to you? He'd never forgive himself for letting his only child get hurt. What would he tell Pepper? The rest of the team?
While Steve didn't doubt your fighting capabilities, you were still a child in his eyes. You were also reckless and had only so much experience on the battlefield. 
"What happened to the child?"
Thor's voice rang through the comms. He was grunting a bit as the sound of Mjolnir hitting against a body echoes in their ears.
"He's been ambushed; he's not answering us."
Steve grunted as he sprinted up the stairs.
"Okay, we got our job done back here, I'll head up and Nat will get the other guy."
Clint says.
"As will I."
Thor responded back.
They didn't respond as they both made it up to the floor above them and saw that the door had been busted through; the sides were melted and still radiating heat, probably from your thrusters. 
They headed up a few more floors, and each one only made their anxiety worse until they reached the door, which was locked. Steve tried to break the lock by slamming his shield on it, but Tony had to blast it open.
"(Name)!"
While they were expecting to be greeted with an intense struggle, they instead found unconscious bodies lying everywhere, and in the middle stood an unscathed and dumbfounded (Name).
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Lesser Evil
Pairing: Pre- Derek/Reader 
Word Count: 1.6k
Summary: Reader witnesses Allison's dad confront Derek at the gas station.
A/N: I kinda want to continue this? Like not as a regular series, but just canonically(?) connected pieces...
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You were pretty sure Allison only asked you to help her get ready for her date because you were Scott’s friend, and either you could give her insight on what he’d like on her, or she was making an effort to befriend you for his sake.
It wasn’t that you didn’t like her, or didn’t want to get to know her, you were just freaked out by the fact that her father was a hunter, and nearly succeeded in killing your best friend. You avoided him at all costs, to the point of risking Coach yelling at you for sitting on the bench next to Stiles so Allison wouldn’t invite you to sit with them. The only reason you agreed to help, is that Lydia was going to be there, too. Of course, that meant your input was nonexistent.
“Pass. Paaaass. Ugh, pass on all of it,” she said, scanning every item in the closet. Finally, she pulled something black and shiny out. “This!”
Allison held it up to her neck, looking at herself in the mirror. “What do you think?” she asked, turning toward you. “Think Scott’ll like it?”
Honestly, she could wear a bread bag and Scott would think she looked great. “He’ll love it,” you smiled, making Lydia beam that you’d approved of her choice.
When her father walked in, you tried not to tense. Luckily, he was too flustered to realized he’d forgotten to knock to notice you right away.
“Hi, Mr. Argent,” Lydia greeted sweetly, plopping down beside you on Allison’s bed.
He gave her a small nod before turning his attention to you. “You must be Y/N,” he said, sticking his hand out. “Allison’s told me a lot about you. It’s good to finally meet you.”
“Good to meet you, too,” you answered, firmly shaking his hand.
“Dad, do you need something?” Allison interrupted, trying to hide her annoyance at his presence.
He told her that because of the curfew due to the animal attacks, she wouldn’t be going out. Allison tried to protest, but he he was firm in his insistence that she stay in. After offering you and Lydia a ride home, to which you both declined, he left, leaving Allison angry enough to decide to sneak out.
You bid them goodnight and wished them luck on their double date, and began the walk back to your house. It was already dark, but you still had about an hour before curfew. A black Camaro sped past, screeching to a halt just ahead before reversing to where you were standing.
“What are you doing?” Derek huffed in exasperation.
“I’m on my way home.”
“There’s an alpha on the loose and he’s after your friend, and you’re walking home in the dark by yourself?”
You frowned at him, not happy at his pointing out your mistake. “Well, yeah, it sounds bad when you say it like that.”
He groaned, rolling his eyes. “Get in.”
You bit the inside of your cheek, weighing your options. You still didn’t fully trust Derek, you hardly knew him, but he did save Scott from the hunters, and he didn’t come after you after you’d had him arrested. Plus, it seemed the better alternative to taking your chances with the alpha.
* * * * * * * * * * * * *
He’d pulled up to the gas station, and you decided to pop into the food mart while he filled his tank. Through the windows, you saw the Argent’s car and another silver one box Derek in. You rushed to the counter with two bottles of water, and pulled up the camera on your phone while the clerk rang you up. You placed the phone in the front pocket of your jacked, and left the store as quietly as you could.
You knew he’d sense you coming, but it was the other three men you were worried about. Using one pump to block the two by the silver SUV, you snuck toward the other pump behind Chris.
“Personally,” he said as he washed Derek’s windshield, “I’m very protective of the things I love. That’s something I learned from my family. And you don’t have much of that these days, do you?”
Derek’s fist balled in anger, and you could see the the rage and sorrow in his eyes. While you couldn’t blame him, you desperately hoped he wouldn’t wolf out.
He didn’t, and it seemed Chris was satisfied with his torment of the younger man. But Derek couldn’t keep his mouth shut. At Chris’ behest, one of the men by the silver car used a gun, a big ass one, to break the driver’s side window. He’d spotted you too late.
“Chris!”
“What the hell is wrong with you?!” you demanded, unable to keep quiet now that you’d been discovered.
Chris stared at you, wide eyed, before signaling his men to get back to their vehicle. “What are you doing out? There’s a curfew.”
“What are you doing harassing people and damaging their property?”
“It’s alright, Y/N,” Derek said. “Get in the car.”
Chris’ face hardened, and his eyes snapped toward Derek. “You’re with him? Absolutely not. Come on, I’ll take you home.” He stepped forward, ready to drag you away.
“I think not,” you scoffed, taking a step back. “I just met you and you haven’t made a very good first impression.”
He watched Derek protectively pull you to his side, his eyes briefly scanning the hunters behind you. If he wasn’t upset before, he was now.
“Y/N, listen to me, it’s dangerous out here.”
“I can see that.”
He set his glare on Derek, throwing all subtlety out the window. “There’s wild animals about.”
“Three standing right here, terrorizing me and my friend.”
You could practically see him swallow his pride. He knew he messed up approaching Derek without being certain he was alone, but he really needed you to trust him right now.
“I’m sorry.” You heard Derek scoff, and you fought to follow suit. “I just want to make sure you get home safe. You’re my daughter’s friend; I feel responsible for you.”
“Yeah, well I feel safer with the guy I’ve known for longer than a couple hours and hasn’t shown signs of being psycho,” you spat.
He stared at the ground, nodding in defeat. “Drive safely.”
Once they’d left, Derek released you. “You shouldn’t have done that.” He opened the car door and started to remove the glass.
You took your phone from your pocket and stopped the recording before replying. “What would you have me have done? Stay inside while they did who knows what else?”
“Yes!” he snapped, rounding on you. “Don’t you get it? If they don’t already think you’ve been turned, too, they will soon!”
“But I haven’t been. If they try to test me, give me some wolfsbane or something to see if I react, I’ll just say something stupid like... I’ll ask if it’s potpourri.”
“Then they’ll narrow it down to Scott that much quicker.”
“Maybe not?” you offered. “I mean, if he asks Allison, Scott told her he hardly knew you.”
He wasn’t satisfied, but it would have to do. He continued cleaning the passenger side, refusing to let you help, and removed his jacket to place on the seat. “Get in.”
The ride to your place was mostly quiet, still unnerved by the hunters boldness. He’d asked what you were going to do with the video, ready to argue with whatever you were going to say. However, when you said you were just going to hang onto it and send it to the sheriff in case you need to rid yourselves of Chris for a bit, he found he couldn’t.
“Try not to be out late if you’re going to be alone,” he said when he parked outside your house.
“You, too.” You didn’t move to get out, though, and he didn’t rush you. “Do you think they’ve gone home?”
“Probably not,” he sighed. “Chris will want to make sure I brought you home unharmed.”
“Right…” You sat in silence again, and though Derek was the type to get irritated and growl at you to get out, he didn’t. He just waited, an expectant look on his face, knowing there was still something on your mind. “Come back if you need to. If you see them following you, or they try to ambush you, just turn around and come back.”
“I’ll be fine.” He’d planned to leave it at that, but your accelerated heart rate made him feel a slight pang of guilt, and told him you needed assurance that they not catch him alone. “They won’t try anything tonight; not after realizing there was a witness. I’ll walk you to the door.”
Your shoulders slumped as you watched him get out of the car, bringing the discussion to an end. You unbuckled your seatbelt and reached for the handle, but he was already there and opening the door.
He scanned the surrounding area, following you as you dug your keys from your pocket. You thanked him for the ride, and he waited until he heard the bolt lock before heading back to his car.
You ran up to your room and to the window. “Be safe, Derek,” you muttered under your breath.
He looked up, sending you a short nod before getting in his car and driving away. You watched until he was out of sight, your breath catching when another car turned onto your street immediately after.
You recognized it as Chris’, and sure enough, the vehicle slowed to a crawl as it passed your house. The window rolled down, and your gaze met his for a moment. He looked relieved, and raised his hand in a waving gesture you didn’t return. Instead, you closed the curtains, listening as the car sped up and out of your neighborhood.
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smolbeandrabbles · 6 years ago
Text
Sway Pt. 6 - Danny Rayburn x Reader (Bloodline)
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Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5 / Here  / Part 7 / Part 8 / Part 9 / Part 10
Authors Note: ‘Better At Being Who I Am’ (Jason Aldean) Is angst theme GOALS. Whilst I always look for lyrics to suit the overall chapter theme, I also like looking for quotes. Two from Bloodline in particular hit me hard during season one; so not only is this part based on them… But I will also be using them during the part… It’s a pretty heavy part, I interspersed some lighter moments, because it’s not always all bad… even when things aren’t going great for our boy…
I wanted to note this chapter takes place over a period of years and is kinda like... the “Lowlights” of those years.
Disclaimer: Direct Quotes from Bloodline season 1 episode 6 & 11 used! Vaguely in context…! This is where I change Canon a little. He is no longer in jail when the resturant burns down... Because I had this idea before I found that out and I didn’t want to change it.
“Okay. Try this. I don’t care about you. You don’t mean anything to me. And if I mean something to you… You mean less than nothing to me.” Danny Rayburn, Season 1, Episode 6.
“I don’t hate you! I could never hate you! That’s my Fucking problem!” John Rayburn, Season 1, Episode 11.
Premise: Danny was known to go off the rails, you thought you’d seen it all. Until the day his restaurant burned down…
Word Count: 9492 (oh yeah. The long haul.)
Warnings: This part is pretty angsty. Essentially it details where in your relationship / pre-to-the-series that Danny’s life starts to fall apart. Drinking/Underage Drinking/Drug Mis-use/Swearing/
What doesn't destroy you Leaves you broken instead Got a hole in my soul growing deeper and deeper And I can't take One more moment of this silence The loneliness is haunting me And the weight of the worlds getting harder to hold up
I'm not OK and it's not all right Won't you drag the lake and bring me home again
Who will fix me now? Dive in when I'm down? Save me from myself Don't let me drown Who will make me fight? Drag me out alive? Save me from myself Don't let me drown
'Cause you know that I can't do this on my own…
Danny’s Apartment, Miami  - PM
Whilst Danny had told you he’d move in (Although, it had taken him about five minutes to actually talk in complete sentences) he’d always wanted to keep that little bit of just in case independence for himself. He told you this one morning over breakfast like it wasn’t a big deal – he was simply moving from his apartment into a newer one. “Oh really? Need help?” “Well. As you know the majority is in boxes. But I’d appreciate another car… Yeah.” “So where are you moving?” “First floor, one floor. Detached. Lot bigger. I was just thinking for Nolan, y’know… If he ever wants to come and stay… It’s a little better.” “I totally get it. AND I think it’s a great idea.” You understood Danny’s hesitancy of introducing Nolan to the apartment you lived in, judging on Danny’s own initial reactions. “Do you want to see it first?” “Danny…” You sighed, shaking your head “It’s your apartment! You go for it.” “Well, I want to know if I’m making the right choice.” “…What does your heart say?” “My heart…?” He looked at you questioningly but then changed his mind “…Says yes…” “Then your decision is made. I’ll see it, when I help you move in!”
You actually had a hard job of moving his boxes. Because your first night together came flooding back at everything you saw and everything you touched.  This would be the final time.
Danny clearly couldn't care less - he was always in between with this place - now where he was couldn’t be clearer to him. But you were slow and careful with everything, and it didn't escape his notice. "What?" he walked past you with another box "I dunno I just... This is the first impression I really got of you..." "Yeah. I'd rather not think on that. It was such a great impression you didn't call me for two days. Heck if you hadn't been persuaded into my restaurant I'd still be waiting...!" "...But I was right." "Owww...!" his voice echoed down the stairs, making you laugh as you followed "Having said that... We really should have had one last night here. For old times sake..." he gave a shrug "just have to christen the new place instead." "Do you ever stop!" "When I think about you?" he paused for effect, to pretend he was doing just that "No." He pushed his fingers to his lips "Not really." You smacked his arm, before walking back upstairs "C'mon baby! With a body like yours!?! How can I not!!! That would be injustice!!" "Danny SHUT UP!!" you knew he'd said it louder just to catch the attention of everyone that might be within earshot. His grin told you that too. He followed you; “It’s literally the second thing we ever did. And it was YOUR idea. I'm the innocent party in this." "You knew what you were doing..." you swung around the door, now the place was almost bare it had more space than Danny had ever made it look like it did. "Yeah, well you're still here... Can you imagine if I didn't! Oh, man..." Even he had to hesitate as he looked at the last box.  You watched him as he picked it up carefully, but stood for a good thirty seconds, before turning to you like he wasn't so sure what to do. You sighed;" Alright, give this place the send-off it deserves... Take me dancing." He smiled "in Little Havana?" "That exact dance floor." "I still get to take you back to the new place?" "Depends what the new place is like. Don't it." he remembered you hadn't seen it yet. "You'll like it. I've already started on fixing it up, see!!! Your boyfriend is just THAT considerate!" he gave a wink "Whatever he says..." you threw an arm around him "…I didn't spend nearly enough time here..." "Oh come on. You won't miss it and neither will I..." he puffed his cheeks "... I'll give it this. We started here. I guess I just never would have expected it to work out. Not this well." he tapped the wall "guess I owe it more than I realised!"
 **
His new apartment was much bigger. Ground floor and light, with distinct rooms. You were impressed.  Or you WERE impressed until you started staring at his decor. It wasn't even like he was trying to make it unnoticeable. About 2ft square the canvas was the only thing on his living room wall. This was the statement piece. Which, you wouldn't have minded. Were you not staring at yourself.
You weren't looking at the camera, but it was taken on your balcony. A bright summers day, you had a glass in your hand. By the dress you were wearing it had to have been a date... And it was recent telling by the 'D' around your neck. "WHAT THE HELL IS THAT!?!" "That is you..." he was nonchalant You pointed at it "Daniel Rayburn you take it down right now!!!! You are NOT keeping that up!!!" You were turning your usual shade of red. "it's damn huge...!! I don't want it there!!!" He scoffed; "Tough. My apartment and I want you on my wall!" "When the heck did you take it!?" "I take photographs all the time! Did you NEVER realise!?" "NO!!!" you were horrified, but it only made him chuckle. "That's probably good, Candids are the best... You look beautiful up there, what's wrong with you!? You ALWAYS look beautiful I had trouble with choosing just one...!" "Well, now I gotta put you up on my wall." Eye-for-an-eye style. If that was the plan, it didn’t work. Instead you were treated to another cheeky wink. “Well, I was beginning to wonder why I wasn't..."
It’d been a few years since that day. And in those intervening years much had happened... Too much... Some of which you’d rather forget.
**
Beth’s Apartment, Miami - Late AM
You pulled your car up to Beth’s apartment and rested your head on the steering wheel for a moment. Danny, what the hell did you get yourself into!? What the hell did you get ME into!? Beth was nice and all – she’d called you to help Danny out more than once; which had quickly made you see why Danny didn’t want you at a lot of the parties he attended - but she didn’t particularly sound pleased with you. You knew whatever it was was Danny’s fault and she couldn’t tell you over the phone, but she was certainly angry and nothing would do other than you driving out here to pick him up. You hopped out of your car and ascended to her apartment. You barely got to knock before she wrenched it open – she certainly looked angry. And you, without context weren’t exactly sure how to react; “Hi Be-” “Do you have ANY idea what your JACKASS of a boyfriend has just put me through!?!” Oh dear… “No. What’s he done?” “I just had to BAIL him from JAIL. BAIL HIM. ME!!” You furrowed your eyebrows together “…And I can pay you back…Beth, I’m sorry I don’t know why he wouldn’t…” You fished your phone out of your bag in preparation to transfer her the amount “I DAMN WELL DO!!” She stopped yelling at the expression on your face and took a deep breath, still sounding angry, she put her hands to her head “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t be yelling at you… I just…” she folded her arms; “He won’t list you, Ms.Ervin because if it gets back to your family or leaks to the press that the daughter of Jack Ervin is dating the guy that held up a drug store with a gun and then was caught selling and in possession of said drugs, he knows he’ll fuck everything up.” You knew your mouth was hanging open; “He WHAT!?” “That’s what they told me!” “God, Danny!!!” You placed a hand to your forehead “Geez… Beth, I’m sorry… How much do I owe you.” “…It’s not even about the money, Y/N… He better damn well pay you back.”  She told you the figure and you shook your head “You didn’t have to do this…” You handed your phone over after typing out an almost eyewatering $8500 “…It’ll transfer instantly.” “I couldn’t just leave him there… He’d get stuck in the system… I mean, even I know he’s been through enough… Then what about you?” “Next time, just call me and I’ll go down.” “Well, we both better hope for his sake there isn’t a next time.” She took the phone from you apologetically as she typed her account in; “He’s still here?” “Yeah. I’m not letting him walk out there alone…” she opened her door, “C’mon.” Danny was sitting with his head between his legs and his hands over his face, Beth kicked his foot. “Time to go, Rayburn! Get out of my house.” He looked up to voice the obvious question, when he spotted you and his face almost went white. He turned to her again; “YOU CALLED HER!?!” “Of COURSE I called her!!” “I told you NOT to call her!!” “Well who else was going to come get you Danny!? Hmm? No way after that you are going home alone.” She pushed his back to get him to stand himself; “Now go home!” She wandered into the back of her apartment “Also! You owe your girlfriend the bail money she just paid me! Do not screw this one up!!!” He was silent as his eyes followed her and then he turned back to you. You weren’t intent on staying very long, standing in the doorway you flicked your head and walked outside. He scrambled to follow you; “Y/N! Y/N! It’s not what you…! God, I’m sorry! I’m so sorry..!” You stopped on the stairs and turned to him, you didn’t feel angry but knew you looked it at the way he stopped. “Danny. I don’t want to hear it. I just want to get you home.”
He slumped into the passenger seat and chewed his lip. You took a deep breath and started the engine. You didn’t like it when Danny got quiet – it meant he was calculating, it meant he was upset or worse... And you knew which one it was. “…Can I light up.” “NO.” “Y/N…” “NO! Danny, when has it ever been OKAY to smoke in my car!” “But I really need to-!” “NO. Don’t push it! Ok?!” He got quiet again and just stared out of the window. Fidgeting the whole way with the pack of cigarettes, he tapped his foot to a beat that wasn’t there... Truth was you weren’t exactly sure what to say to him – what he’d done was serious, and he clearly wasn’t blameless. You just wondered how in the hell he’d gotten himself into it. You wanted answers, but he was hurting, and that hurt you. You rolled the 4 x 4 into your parking spot after what felt like hours but was barely a 30-minute drive. You both sat in silence for a moment… You were staring out of your own window, before you took up the same position against your wheel again. Why? He noticed this and turned to you; “Y/N…” When you didn’t respond he tried again; “I know… I fucked up. Like I seriously fucked up. I get it… And I’m sorry… I’m really sorry… and you have, every, right to be mad at me… And I don’t… Well, I guess the problem is I DID know what I was thinking but I… I wanted to protect you from… This whole… God… I’m such a mess…” He sighed and opened his car door; “…Okay, you know what, you’re right. You don’t want to hear it and you don’t need this. Lemmie just call a cab, and I’ll get back to my apartment-” You moved, grabbing his hand as he was half way out of the vehicle; “You are NOT going anywhere. Danny Rayburn.” You shook your head “Yeah. You probably did fuck up. Considering what Beth told me. But don’t you DARE think about walking out of here.” You took his hand again and held it firmly upon exiting your vehicle. Pulling him through the security door and across the lobby to the lift bank; “If this ever happens again will you PLEASE call me?” “It wasn’t even supposed to go down like this…” The lift pinged and you both entered, as you pressed the button to your floor; “So you weren’t meant to get caught. Danny, that doesn’t make robbing the damn store in the first place alright!!!” “I know, and I’m sorry!” “You don’t have to say sorry to me. I’m not mad at you!!” Well, maybe you were a little “…I’m frustrated. You have Nolan, you have your restaurant, you have me!! You don’t need to do this!” “I told you, that restaurant does not pay all the bills.” He owed people, that’s what he was telling you, without saying it. “Danny, look at my family! LOOK at me!! TRUST me, you do not need to go anywhere else for money.” “NO! I can’t take it from you! Or your family!” “It’d be a loan, it’d be fine!” “NO.” He’d point blank refused to let you help out before, but honestly, if he was going to make money illegally you didn’t know why he was being so stubborn about this. Getting into debt with your parents, or you, would not be the same as falling in with bad people. You opened your apartment door and pointed to the balcony; “Now, you can light up… Just… give me a second…” He watched you go… then crossed your kitchen and living room, sliding open the balcony door – he pulled a cigarette from the pack and flicked the lighter taking a drag. Were you mad at him? You said you weren’t. But you looked mad, or maybe you looked hurt. Or maybe both… He could understand why you would be both. He was nearly two cigarettes down when you joined him outside. You pressed your hands into the metal railing and the wind played with your hair as you stared out towards the ocean. He took another drag of his cigarette before he turned to you… Then he stopped and squinted; “…Oh…Oh…Darlin’…” He closed the few steps between you “…Have you been cryin’?” You didn’t answer, so he reached out and turned your face towards him; “God… I’m so sorry…” Just how many times was he going to say that line? You shook your head, dipping from his line of sight, and pulled him close to you; “Do you have ANY idea what could have happened if it had gone wrong!? Danny… Don’t you EVER do something like this again…” “…I promise…” He whispered it softly, “Baby, I promise…” The last thing Danny Rayburn ever wanted was to make you cry… You squeezed him tighter to you, so you could feel that calm and steady heartbeat of his reverberate through your body, then you let him go, gently. Wiping your eyes, you looked into his. “I love you… Danny. I love you. But sometimes, the people you hang out with… some of the things you do. Baby, you scare me…” You shook your head gently, “Please… Stop…” He pondered your words for a moment, taking another drag from his cigarette, but he knew he wasn’t sure what to say. “I feel like I knew that….” And he was sure he did “…I’m sorry… I’m not thinkin’ and I think you know that… But, I’ma try… for you… and for Nolan. Ok?” You nodded, you knew Danny was better than this. But it was a long hard road for him – you just wanted to see him right on it. “Okay…” You leant up to kiss him, and he accepted by kissing you back. “I love you, too…” This time when he pressed his cigarette to his lips his look was sincere. And you knew he meant it. REALLY meant it.
 **
 Danny’s Apartment / Miami Coast Line - Noon/Late
You sung along to your radio all the way to Danny’s apartment. It wasn’t often he insisted staying in his own, he just still wasn’t ready to introduce Nolan to yours yet. It made sense, Nolan was a young impressionable teen… Danny was intent on making the best impression. You were dancing in the front seat, windows down, music blasting – shades on. It was nearly mid-day and the sun was high but the breeze off the water today was cool. You turned into the apartment complex and rolled to a stop. Even with the radio off you were still humming along as you stepped out of the car. And you realised you had until you walked up to Danny’s front door to decide on something for you all to do today… Well. There was always the boat… Maybe not the one you’d taken Danny on though… too many memories completely inappropriate to be reminded of around his teenage son. You shouldered your bag and pushed your shades into your hair. By the time you’d looked up you realised they were both already outside… Geez, give a girl a minute…! You began walking up the path, and opened your mouth to greet Nolan. Then stopped when you realised that he wasn’t smiling as he started down the path towards you; “Hey…You, okay?” He barely stopped “No.” “…Nolan!” “No, you know what it’s fine!” “Where are you--!?” “Anywhere else!” He yelled, taking off down the sidewalk. You looked on after him, for a few seconds before turning to Danny, who was standing in the door arms folded; you pointed behind you – “What…?” “It doesn’t matter.” “Doesn’t!?” You turned back to Nolan, now nearly half way down the street “DANNY! Did you guys have an argument?!” You checked your watch, “You can’t have been back from the restaurant 20 minutes! What happened!” “Y/N – It doesn’t matter.” “Of course it matters!” “Why?” He gave a nonchalant shrug, “He’s made it perfectly clear he doesn’t want to see me.” He closed the door behind him and shuffled down the path to you. You looked to him, “But we were gonna…” “Yeah, well. Not anymore. Just let him go.” “You don’t mean that…” You could see he was trying to keep his face from betraying him “…Danny… you don’t…” You turned back to Nolan, “Oh. Geez…! NOLAN WAIT!!” You ran back down the path; “What the hell are you doing!?” Danny called after you, making you turn back; “I won’t watch your son walk away from you Danny. I can’t…!” For one, you knew it would break your heart. You had to run to catch up with him; “Nolan! Nolan… wait up…” It was almost a surprise that he did in fact stop and turn as you jogged to a stop; “…I don’t need to know what it was about…” You held your hands up “Hell, I know – but equally I know I don’t know…!” Danny could be difficult, and you couldn’t fathom what his relationship with Nolan really was. Danny wanted to pour as much into Nolan as he did keep him at arm’s length. It hurt the teen more than Danny thought it did.  “…Look, I wanted this to be a good day for you… So… If you want to do something… We can just… I’d just... Really appreciate it if you didn’t leave.” “…He doesn’t care.” “No, he only acts that way. And it’s a dumb way to act… He’s good at pushing people away when he cares… It’s a constant uphill battle. You shouldn’t have to fight it…” you threw your arms as if to say hell if you could ever understand Danny Rayburn “… The problem is having to accept we do. Look, I got a good plan going… And I’d like you to be part of it. But, only if you want to sweetie.” You really really liked Nolan. You weren’t about to watch Danny waste this. He huffed and folded his arms too, looking away from you and thinking on it for far longer than he had spent making up his mind; a typical teenager. “Does he have to come?” You laughed, “Just push him off the Yacht, you’ll feel better. Honest.” You turned back to unlock your car that Danny was now leaning against, watching you both shyly. “Sorry!? Did you just say Yacht!?” Nolan then jogged to keep up with you “You have a yacht!? Awesome!” And it almost sounded genuine. “Can I leave you two alone for five minutes without you wanting to walk all the way back. Because you will be walking from here…” Your question was more directed at Danny, and you only received a half nod. Neither of them had spoken more than about two words yet. You’d rectify that. You were determined to rectify that. You left the car, hopeful it might give them some time to cool off and apologise for whatever... But fully expecting to see your dad’s assistant greeting you with keys, you were surprised to discover that it was him. “Papa?!” “I’m only working on the waterfront,” He pointed in an unclear direction; “thought I’d come see your boys.” “I left them in the car!” You indicated behind you “but I’ll go get ‘em...” “I’ll meet you down there!” He was already walking down the pier. You shook your head, it was all men... you were pretty sure. ALL of them were like this! You wandered back to your 4x4; it still didn’t look like they were talking... “Okay, out you get. Dad is here. Best behaviour.” Today was obviously going to be like having two kids, rather than your boyfriend and his teenage son.
They walked apart down nearly the entire pier... you wondered if it was more a game of who could hold out the longest without apologising. Honestly! They both instantly changed their attitudes as your dad stepped off the smaller vessel. “Jack!” “Danny! A pleasure as always! Nolan!! Great to see you!” He gave Danny a firm handshake, but went for a full hug with Nolan. When you first told your parents about Nolan you were wondering what they would say. At that point you shouldn’t have been surprised by their surprise reaction. You guessed it might be because they had expected a man of Danny’s age to have been in a serious relationship, or married, before. Certainly the kind of relationship where children was plausible. Of course their first reaction was, how did you feel about that and then, seen as you were totally cool with it (obviously), when they would get to meet him. Since then, your parents had invited Danny and Nolan to dinner on numerous occasions, and included Nolan in any family event. If Danny was family to them, it was only natural that Nolan would be too.
You left them to chat with your dad as you checked the boat was ready to go. Considerably smaller than the yacht it was moored next to, your dad had already seen to nearly all preparations in the time it had taken you to walk here. Your dad turned back to you “Sure you’re okay with how fast this thing goes?!” Oh here we go... if he could get a dig in at the first few times you’d been out, when he was trying to teach you how to drive NO less!!, then he would. You wondered how it had factored into the conversation this time... “I’ll be okay. It’s been a while since...!” “I’m only saying you got a couple of strong men here... one of which can actually drive a boat.” You let out a sigh, and heard both Danny and Nolan laugh. “If I can steer the other one, this’ll be just fine.” “Yeah I’m glad I got her back in one piece.” “Guess you’ll be thanking Danny for that too, huh?”  You and your father both folded your arms defiantly “Yeah. He’s a good man. I’m only worried about the speed.” “I know what I’m doing.” “My red tape mark says otherwise.” This was leaving the other two cracking up. “... Oh my god... you are kidding!!!” You turned around to check; sure enough, your father had taped back the little marker he used for the top speed you were allowed to go. Back in your teens. You were sure that was just for Danny and Nolan’s entertainment. “Now you boys take care of her alright, make sure she doesn’t go too fast! And not a shade over that line!” Still chuckling they both boarded; “Don’t worry Mr.Ervin we won’t!” “We’ll have her back with you this evening. Say 9?” “Woah. Danny... 8:30, don’t go getting ahead of yourself.” Finally you could laugh at someone else. “Estrellita, no staying at the houses of other men tonight!!” He winked “... You’re lucky I trust you with this one!” “I’m in good hands dad don’t worry!” “Oh I know! I wouldn’t trust just anyone with you!” He had a sincerity that you could tell hit both Danny AND Nolan hard. Your dad held out the keys, “So? Who is getting these.” You pointed to Danny “As you’re so confident in the Rayburn’s.” Danny opened his mouth to protest but missed his chance as Jack chucked him the keys. “Be careful with her!” “I’ll get it back in one piece, Sir...” Your father chuckled, unmooring the boat “Not what I meant...!”
 Danny made sure the boat ran smoothly as he headed out across the stretch of water; “You just wanna head out anywhere...” He was clearly addressing you, as you watched the Miami skyline unfurl in front of you. Nolan was at the other end of the vessel running his hands through the sea. You stood and crossed to Danny “Uh... I didn’t have a place in mind... I wasn’t going to take him where we were last time, if that’s what you mean...” “Okay...” he checked the gauges; “I’ll take her a few more miles...”  you were still looking to Nolan “I’ll do it.” “What?” He turned his attention to you “Why?” You nodded back towards his son; “I don’t care what happened, but one of you needs to be the bigger man.” “Me?!” “You’re his father, Danny, yes you!” He sighed and gave you something close to a pout; “So you think this is my fault?!” “NO! I didn’t say that. I’m trying to fix it. Go... Go on…” you pushed him gently “I got this. Just... talk to him!!”
 You took the boat another few miles out and let her coast perpendicular to South Beach. When you turned back they were at least talking. Both of them hunched over the side and mumbling, looking back towards the city. You left them for a little while, going through what exactly your dad had decided to ‘get ready’... The cooler was a good indication of what he thought the day would entail. You opened it; breathing a sigh of relief when you realise that he remembered Nolan was underage. You guessed as it would just be an afternoon trip you didn’t need anything more than a few good drinks. You pulled one out and popped the top. The sound made both of them turn towards you. “Oh. I notice you heard that!” Danny pointed at you, “That better be alcohol!!” “NO! It’s soda! I don’t want to be the bad influence on this one!” You took a sip, indicating to Nolan; “Aw c’mon Y/N - you really think YOU’RE the bad influence here?!” Nolan looked between you and Danny a few times before Danny realised what he was doing; “Hey-!” You both laughed at that. “But there is alcohol in there, right?!” “Looks like...” “Excellente!” Danny stood and opened the cooler up; before you realised what was going on, he had handed Nolan a bottle. Nolan thanked his father, but you weren’t so keen “Uh! That better be Non-Alcoholic young man!” He hesitated, making Danny laugh; “Aw, C’mon! Like you didn’t do a little underage drinking!” “Yeah – My parents didn’t condone it!” “His mom’s not here!” Nolan took a sip with a laugh, making you cover your eyes “Oh God! I’m not seeing this!!” “Go into international waters! You’ll be fine!” “NO! That might get me in even MORE trouble!”
*
“Nolan you know how to drive one of these right?!” “What?!” He looked to you, “He doesn’t. But no time like the present.” Danny took a gulp of beer. “I was gonna say, my dad put that marker on as a joke but it’s a good little marker for beginners...” “Are you serious?!?” Nolan jumped out of his seat; “You got a good teacher. I’m not too bad either.” You laughed, realising Danny was referencing you. “Oh. No. Rayburn, he’s your son!!” “Yeah alright, Ervin. Then we’ll do this together...!” “He doesn’t need my bad habits!” “At least you admit you have them!” Danny beckoned Nolan over; “C’mon. I’m sure she’ll help get the basics down...!”
You observed the hysterical exchanges going on between Nolan and Danny the whole way back to port. Glad that now they were at least laughing in each other’s company. As you watched them, framed by the boat, the water, the Miami skyline, you knew perfectly well you could stay here forever. It might not have been that kind of family… But you were a family none the less… You loved them both. Truly, you knew what you already knew. This would be long haul. Ride or die. All or nothing.
**
Viva Caputa, Miami - PM
You wanted to be in that restaurant. When Danny told you he was doing this you wanted nothing more than to be there. He forbid it. You absolutely were NOT setting foot in that restaurant today under any circumstances. And you continued this back-and-forth until he pulled up outside; “You should let me.” “No. Absolutely not.” “Why?! Are you scared of what I’m going to say to him?!” “I kinda am. Yeah.” You folds your arms to prove your point “You don’t think I’m scared of what he’s gonna say to you?!” No dice though. So in the car you stayed.
This was the most nerve wreaking hour of your life. Part of you thought about defying Danny and just heading into the restaurant anyway... or sneaking in to listen to the conversation. But you knew you would be betraying Danny’s trust, and you knew Robert. If he said anything, no matter how small or veiled, you wouldn’t be able to contain yourself and then there would be problems.
Eventually, Nolan wandered out of the restaurant and to the car. You raised an eyebrow; “What’s going on?” Nolan shrugged; “He told me to wait in the car...” You tapped your fingernails on the dashboard “...Robert has NO idea I’m here does he.” “Nope.” You shook your head, staring back at the door from the window... “What did you think?” “Of Robert...? He’s uh... okay, I guess. I mean, I thanked him... He doesn’t need to send money every month.” You opened your mouth and then decided to hold your tongue. Nolan was right, you guessed, but he was also their Grandson... and if they knew about him they should have been doing a lot damn more than sending money each month. It was another while later that Danny and Robert exited the restaurant. They said goodbye like strangers, and went separate ways... you figured this couldn’t be good.  Danny took a deep breath before he opened the car door; “Alright. Let’s go.” “Did it go okay?” “It went Ok.” But he didn’t look at you, and his voice was level. Something was clearly off, because of Danny had got what he wanted he’d be running his mouth. You let it go, if only for Nolan’s sake. Danny started the engine and turned back to Nolan “Thank you for doing this...” “No problem dad! It was kinda good to meet him.” You watched Danny carefully, but he was being just as careful not to show anything on his face... “Yeah... you’re right...” The drive back to Nolan and Eve’s was quiet. Each of you preoccupied with your own thoughts. You clearly desperate to say something and Danny swearing you to silence with his body language alone. Nolan hopefully none the wiser... but he was a smart kid, so he probably figured something was going on.
You only opened your mouth once Danny pulled away from the curb; “Tell me what happened.” He released the breath he’d been holding waiting for you to say it; “With Nolan he was actually quite amicable. Which I’m glad of... because the last thing I want is him to cause my kid any problems... with me? Well... You know my dad.” “Danny...” you shook your head “...So he said no?” “Not exactly.” “Baby it’s clear he didn’t say yes...” Danny shook his head “No. He made me chose.” “What?!” “Money for the restaurant. Or the money he provides for Nolan.” You were almost speechless. That money was hush money for a start, and seen as Danny had already confessed to you his parents tried to stop Nolan from ever happening, it made you even more angry. Robert was making Danny choose between arguably his greatest achievement and his dream. You weren’t having it. “And?” He gave a half laugh “I chose Nolan. No question.” You were grateful. But it was also clear Danny had no other choice. That didn’t stop you from being pissed that after all Danny’s hard work and what he had to show for it his family still treated him SO badly. It was horrific for you to think that after everything Danny still literally couldn’t do anything right in the eyes of his own family. And you damned every single one of them.
“Danny... that’s just... absolutely... your family, your parents, are just despicable...” He knew there was more to your statement than just this single event. Suddenly you realised this has nothing to do with Sarah, Sarah was an excuse. Sarah was long in the past… Danny had made mistakes (with no wonder WHY!!) and you’d seen them. But to tear him down when he’d done all this ALONE was the most heart-breaking thing. It was sick and to your horror you knew it’s never going to stop. It should have ended on his accomplishment with the restaurant alone. Danny had bet on himself and STILL... it was obvious to you now if it wasn’t clear before; HE was too good for them. He just gave a helpless shrug “What can I do about it?” He laughed “He actually asked me to go to my siblings! Can you believe that?! Meg and Kevin - I don’t think so... and John? He’s given me enough... he’s a better big brother than I am...” You folded your arms; “Screw it. Danny you don’t need them...” shaking your head you looked out the window again “You know I’m so angry that I don’t even know what to say but I just can’t shut up!!” He laughed; “Exactly why you being there would not have been a good idea...” “How are my parents friends with yours?!” “Oh yeah cuz this is the exterior my dad gives off...” he waved his hand “... what do your parents know.” “What I know is that my parents are better parents to you than your own.” He tipped his head “That’s not untrue... they certainly treat Nolan like family.” “Well then.” You ran your hands through you hair and breathed out “Danny I’m sorry.” “You keep sayin’ that... but you can’t change them. Or the past.” “If they continue to use what happened as an excuse... then I think it’s them that needs to change.” You placed your hand over his on the wheel “You’ve done enough. And you have so much more to show for it than them. And More importantly Danny. You’re a better person, and they can’t ever take that from you.” He lifted your hand to his lips and kissed your knuckles, mumbling against your skin “…That’s why I have you…”
 **
Viva Caputa, Miami - AM Your phone rang in the middle of an important work meeting. Buzzing loudly against the table you picked it up so not to disturb your colleagues train of thought. Catching a glimpse of the caller, however, made you stop in your tracks. He barely ever called you when you were working. And never on your work phone. “Sorry. I have to take this!” Your boss waved you out, understanding, and you picked up on the final ring which clearly didn't help whatever the situation was; “Dan-” you barely got his name out, “Y/N..! Oh T-thank God-I- I...” He sounded panicked and he was most certainly in tears. “My God... Danny what's wrong??” “Just... G-Get down here. Please.” “To the restaurant? Danny are you okay?” “No... Just... Please hurry.” With that he hung up, and his panic transferred to you. But now was not a time to panic. You tapped on the door to beckon Rich over, “Is everything okay?” “No. Danny doesn't call at work and not on this number ever. Somethings going on... I need to go...” He smiled “Take all the time you need, take the rest of the day at home. We'll be fine.' “You sure?” “You know this back to front. Go...! If he needs you, go!”
You drove as fast as the limit and traffic conditions let you, but a few blocks out you could see the smoke rising. No, please God no... As you got even closer water was running all over the street from the fire trucks present. And you couldn't park up fast enough. When you found him he was sitting in the middle of the parking lot, his legs crossed. Staring at the restaurant but not seeing it. He had a pack of cigarettes and his lighter in front of him, but it was like he couldn't even bring himself to calm down yet. You ran across the lot then slowed as you reached him, without hesitation you crouched to his level and threw your arms around him. “I'm sorry... I'm so, so, so sorry” You were crying too now. This was Danny's life. And it'd just gone up in flames like everything else. Eventually he responded, winding his arms tightly around you as you both sat crying in the parking lot. He was broken enough, he didn't need this, and he certainly didn't need to say anything.
It was early, and there was no-one here yet. But as people turned up for their shifts you decided to start directing them back home. Only Javier and Jason stayed. They were clearly concerned for their friend, but you kept them down the other end of the lot; “Is he gonna be OK?” Jason peered around you. Danny was still sitting in the same position you'd left him in. “I don't think it's even registered yet...” You shook your head “he's in shock. God knows what I tell Nolan...” Javier frowned “Wasn’t this Danny's life? Geez after the remodel we just went through... I feel terrible.” He was right. And Danny still owed a lot of money for that loan. You turned to them both; “You better get off home… I got him… Thank you… For staying.” “If you need anything…” Jason put his hand on your shoulder, sincere “ANYTHING. Help with Danny or… CALL me. CALL us.” You nodded, grateful and thinking you might need it before the week was out. “Thank you. Both of you…”
“Danny...” You sank back down to the floor “Danny, sweetheart we need to go... we need to let them finish up here... Baby, there’s nothing we can do...” “Y/N! N-No-! Just-! Please!” You picked him up off the floor, and he was only a little reluctant to let you tug his arm around your shoulders. You gathered the cigarettes he still hadn’t touched; “Baby, please... let me take you home...” You almost had to drag him back to the car and help him into the front seat. He still wasn’t entirely in the moment and aware of the situation... You’d done all you could here and you couldn’t watch him sit there and suffer anymore. You placed his things in his lap and wandered back around to your side. Without daring to look back at the restaurant once, you started the engine and pulled away.
 So as to keep Danny moving, you took the long scenic route back to your apartment. You wanted to keep him lucid, but knew half of what you were talking was nonsense. You were talking at him and not to him... He kept flicking his lighter, back and forth, staring hard at your dashboard... You guessed it was a blessing that he hadn’t told you to shut up yet, because you needed to talk... Eventually, you ran out of things to say but you were still driving. He was still playing with his Lighter... You sighed and slowed your car down... Leaning across him you wound down his window. Danny only moved to steady the wheel for you, you sat up, looking across to him. “If you’re gonna do it... Danny...” you nodded to the window, “Please do...” He looked back to you. Danny smoked sometimes to relieve tension. You’d seen him do it to stop himself arguing, as much as he did when he had finished an argument. Of course, he smoked a lot anyway but this was another one of his ticks... He pulled one out of the pack and held it delicately between his lips. Looking across to you again, his eyes gave his question for him. Signalling you could back out. You wouldn’t. This once, you wouldn’t. When you didn’t respond he flicked his lighter and lit up. It was a long drag, and the sigh he made when he breathed out was the unhappiest you’d heard Danny in a while. **
Your Apartment, Uptown Miami - AM
About a week past where nothing really happened. Danny became quiet, withdrawn and didn’t have much of an appetite to do anything. You guessed that was better than him going and getting himself thrown in jail again. Still, that didn’t stop you from worrying all day when you departed in the morning only to come back to find him in exactly the same place you’d left him – wondering if he’d moved at all during the day. Every time you tried to broach the subject of fronting any money for him to rebuild he wasn’t having it. And you stopped trying when he seemed to only get angry about it, rather than politely saying no.
This weekend was another when you would be seeing Nolan, though. And you thought it might cheer him up. Apparently no such luck, at least not this morning. You wrapped your arms around him and kissed his shoulder; “We’re meant to pick Nolan up… you know?” “…Hmm…” That was close enough to acknowledgement “…So…Are you coming?” “…No…” You guessed it was an actual word “Baby, why not?” “…NO…” You sighed; “Well, you’re gonna be alright when he gets here, right…?” You propped yourself up on your elbow to look at him properly, he just continued staring at the wall. And for once you’d give anything to know what was going on behind those eyes. “…Yeah…Go get him.” It didn’t sound at all convincing, but you knew it would be on Danny if no one turned up for his kid. Eve was pretty much always on the edge of ‘just had it’ with Danny as it was. Better not to make her that way with you too. You dressed and got ready quickly, turning as you went to shut the bedroom door behind you; “I’ll be back within the hour, okay?” “Ok…” “Danny…” “Yes?” “I love you.” “Hm.” You shook your head. If he wasn’t going to play ball you’d just have to do something with Nolan yourself. You closed the door behind you and ran to catch the lift down to the parking lot.
 “Hey!” “…Where’s dad?” “Let’s not even go there…” You waved to Eve from your driver’s seat, she smiled and waved enthusiastically back. “…We will have to see when we get back to mine.” “Oh. Well. Shit.” Nolan opened the car door, and also waving to his mom, belting himself in as you pulled away from the curb. “That sums it up yeah…” “He’s really that bad!?” “…I dunno… He’s not really… Talking. That worries me only because he talks about everything…” “I can’t imagine that.” “Yeah…” You agreed with a laugh, “You’d think it’d be okay. It is, for the first hour.” You sighed “Anyway, plans for today?” “Won’t it depend on him?” “No! If he’s not gonna come out I’m determined to take you out somewhere…” “Surprise me.” “…Fine! How’d you feel about ice-cream?” “What?” He had an edge to his voice that let you know he thought you were treating him like 6 of his 16 years. “…That’s a clear No.” “I didn’t say that!” “There’s a great little homemade ice-cream bar I know down by South Beach… Puerto Rican… You can practice your Spanish on someone who isn’t me. I haven’t even taken Danny yet so…” “Yeah… sure…” You liked that he sounded at least curious. If Nolan was to give anyone any of his teenage attitude he never gave it to you. You unlocked the door to your apartment and stepped in. Within 5 seconds, and horrified, you attempted to usher Nolan out and close the door on him before he could walk in. In vain; the kid was strong. “…Is that…?” He didn’t dare voice it either. “Shit! Danny!!” Your alcohol cupboard was also open. A half-finished bottle of vodka stood on the counter. The bottle next to it, you couldn’t read the label of, was tipped on its side and clearly finished. Across your kitchen counter, however, was a line of white powder that you weren’t stupid enough to think was sugar. Drinking was one thing, illegal substances in your apartment was quite another. What do you even do about that!?! You placed your hands against your head trying to think quickly, until there was a crash from your bedroom. At least he hadn’t left. Nolan took a step forward but you pushed him back; “NO. No, no. I got this.” “Y/N..! Do you think that’s a good idea!?” He indicated to the counter. “…If he’s high and drinking then yeah, it is. Wait here.” You crept up the corridor, knocking gently on your bedroom door - your heart was racing. When you didn’t receive a response you opened it carefully. Danny was sitting on the end of your bed, head in his hands. Amazingly the room didn’t look out of place, until you glanced to the wall, whatever liquid was in the glass was now running down it, the remains of the tumbler was shattered and covered the floor. You kicked the door to with the back of your heel; “…Danny?” Dammit, you couldn’t have hated yourself more for the timid nature of your voice. He didn’t look up “…Danny.” You tried again, a little more confident “…Baby… What…?” He groaned “Just. Leave.” “What!?” This was your apartment. And you weren’t about to leave him alone with drink AND drugs “No- What?! I’m not just gonna leave!” He made a sound like he was angry and looked at you; “GO! GET OUT!” You weren’t sure you liked his tone of voice either. “I am NOT leaving you! Don’t you dare ask me to!” He stood and you backed yourself against the door “I am NOT ASKING.”  Despite this you still tried; “Danny. You are high and god knows how much you’ve drunk. You need help. RIGHT now. And I can’t leave!” He took a step forward “WHY?! WHY THE HELL DO YOU EVEN CARE Y/N!? Look at me!” You were, and you didn’t like what you were seeing “I’m a fucking MESS!” “I care because I LOVE you.” Why was he being like this!? Well, you knew WHY… But that didn’t mean you understood. He shook his head and advanced on you, and it pained you that you could feel yourself shaking; “Okay. Try this. I don’t care about you. You don’t mean anything to me. And if I mean something to you… You mean less than nothing to me.” Owch. It was like being stabbed through the heart, and you hated even more that your vision blurred and tears started running. He laughed at that, hollow. Not the man you knew. “SEE!! SEE! This is so fucking perfect! THIS!! THIS IS ME!” You couldn’t believe that for a second. You wouldn’t and you knew you were right. But you couldn’t stop how much what he had just said was hurting you, he kept yelling, but you weren’t even registering what he was saying. Only he was getting closer and you didn’t like it. He was trying to push you away, you weren’t having that. “STOP IT!” You were loud enough to stop his tirade. You shook your head, tears still running, your voice trembled, but you would not raise it; not to Danny. Not now. That’s exactly what he wanted, he wanted you to scream at him, he wanted you to tell him to leave and slam that door behind you and never see him again. You wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of being right “…I don’t know who the hell you think you are Danny Rayburn. But don’t you EVER tell me I mean nothing to you. I don’t know what is wrong with you. But I know you’re high, and you’re drunk and you are going to regret EVERYTHING you just said to me.” You pulled your bedroom door open and slammed it behind you. You weren’t sure if you could stop Danny from leaving, but you could take every set of keys that was here to try. You walked back through into the kitchen trying to dry your eyes before you got back to Nolan. But he was standing there in shock. And you realised he’d heard everything. “He can’t talk to you like that…” You took a breath; “Nolan. Don’t.” “HE CAN’T!”  It took everything you had to push him back “Leave it!! Nolan! Please! I beg you just leave it!” “You’re crying! How can you say that…!!” “Nolan… Please… For me. Don’t go in there…” “…Why?” “He is not himself…” “No shit! He’s drinking and has God knows how much cocaine in him!” “Please..! Can we just… go…” Nolan sighed, because you clearly weren’t giving this one up. “Okay…” He headed towards the front door and that’s when you noticed your kitchen counter was spotless, the cupboard was closed and the empty bottle was sat for recycling. “…Did you just do this…?” “Yeah.” “What did you do with the…?” “It doesn’t matter.” “Nolan!” “It’s not here anymore. That’s all that matters.” “Does he have anymore…” Nolan blatantly lied; “I’d say not. I think he did enough to finish it.” You didn’t question that Nolan had likely found the rest somewhere and had disposed of it, but if he wanted to keep that to himself you didn’t blame him.
***
 You still weren’t sure what you were going to find when you opened the door. Inserting the key you leant your head against it. “Do you want me to go in first?” You took a deep breath “Nope…” If things were better, you needed to talk to his father first. If not you weren’t about to let Danny say something stupid. The lock clicked open to the apartment looking exactly how you had left it. “Danny?” You were still met with silence. “Could he have left?” “He wouldn’t get far. I’ve got all the keys…” You walked on through, there were no signs of him, and your bedroom door was still closed; “Just let me check…” “If he starts yelling again you can’t stop me!” You turned back to Nolan; “Yeah okay… Get settled!” You opened your bedroom door. No? He wasn’t clearly in your bedroom, you glanced to the wall. The glass had disappeared from the floor, and the bed looked half made. Surely he hadn’t actually walked out of your front door? You said you weren’t leaving so he did? Well, at least he could only go back to his apartment. Then you heard it, faint with the door closed your onsuite fan hummed almost inconspicuously. You placed your bag down on the bed, also noticing his mobile was still on the bedside table. You placed your hand on the cool metal handle but it took you a good minute to open it. He was sitting with his knees up, head back against the cool tiles of your shower cubicle. His eyes were closed and he had one hand against his forehead and one over his knees. The rise and fall of his chest let you know he was at least alive. “…Danny…?” “Ugh…” He laughed, again un-genuine, “…What are you doing back…? Can’t you go hate me somewhere else…?” You shook your head. His voice was dry and it cracked in places. He coughed and took a sip from the glass of what you hoped was water next to him. “It at least sounds like you might be sober?” “Maybe…” He breathed it “Everything hurts and I’ve more than paid for it…” That left you to guess he was in here because his stomach was now empty. “…I’m such an fucking jackass…” You stepped over to the wall opposite him. “This might be the one time I don’t disagree with you.” “…I can’t believe I…” He sighed “Go on… Just… tell me you’re done. Kick me out… I get it.” “...Look at me.” He didn’t. He dipped his head before he opened his eyes. “Danny. LOOK at me.” “So I can see how disappointed you are? Or how angry or… how…” he shook his head “Scared? I can’t get that LOOK out of my head.” “Look at me.” You repeated it again, and slowly he raised his eyes to meet yours, he looked incredibly guilty. You took a deep breath; “I’m not kicking you out. OR leaving you.” “Why?! I would! After saying that!? Even in my state that was TOO far!” “Yeah, I know what you said. I know what you wanted. Because it’s easier for you, isn’t it? To deal with something by not having to deal with anyone else. But you’re stuck with me. As for Nolan…” “SHIT!” “Yeah well, he heard everything, so I’d apologise to him first.” “I haven’t even got sorry out yet. I didn’t even… SEE! This is why you should just…” He stopped for a minute and you thought he might be sick. “You okay?” “Yeah… Yeah… I…” He placed his hands on his stomach “Oh… God…” “How much did you take?” “…I did three lines… and drank something like a bottle and a half…” “THREE lines!?” “I know I know… I shouldn’t even have it.” “NO. There’s that…” He placed his arms across his knees again and rested his head against them; “Y/N... I just lost... everything... there’s nothing left... except...”  he waved in the general direction of the kitchen... you shook your head.
“Daniel Rayburn you’ve never been more wrong of anything in your entire life.” He lifted his eyes to look at you, you’d called him Daniel so, this was serious “I know... The restaurant is your life. A symbol of everything you built and everything you achieved... But it is material... Baby... You have me. More importantly than that you have Nolan... And that boy... He’s going to be a great man...” “In spite of me, not because of it.” “... You’re wrong. He is going to be a great man LIKE his father is. Self-made. Resourceful. Smart.” You couldn’t keep from laughing to yourself “One hell of a looker...” You leant on your hand for a second “That’s what I love about you Danny. Not your name, who you are. Not what you came from, what you have DONE. You don’t think I would want to stick around? You’re at a low point and I know it... And you know it... But, baby, I can’t wait to be around to see the bounce back...” He sighed and looked back to you, “…Please… I’m begging you to stop looking at me like that.” “Like what?” You weren’t aware that you were looking at him like anything “Like you love me.” “Well that’s unfortunate…” You slid down the wall to his level. “I DO love you.” “After what I just said…?” “You weren’t you. Half YOUR problem is you want to push people away… I understand why. But I don’t think you understand that not everyone wants to be pushed away…” “Don’t you hate me…? You must hate me a little…?” You smiled, shaking your head with a little laugh; “I don’t hate you… I could never hate you. That’s my Fucking problem...”
@stcphstrange - We made it!! All the way here! 4 to go! ❤
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feministdragon · 6 years ago
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Peter Jackson’s Cartoon War
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When director-producer Peter Jackson’s World War I film, “They Shall Not Grow Old,” which miraculously transforms grainy, choppy black-and-white archival footage from the war into a modern 3D color extravaganza, begins, he bombards us with the clichés used to ennoble war. Veterans, over background music, say things like “I wouldn’t have missed it,” “I would go through it all over again because I enjoyed the service life” and “It made me a man.” It must have taken some effort after the war to find the tiny minority of veterans willing to utter this rubbish. Military life is a form of servitude, prolonged exposure to combat leaves you broken, scarred for life by trauma and often so numb you have difficulty connecting with others, and the last thing war does is make you a man.
Far more common was the experience of the actor Wilfrid Lawson, who was wounded in the war and as a result had a metal plate in his skull. He drank heavily to dull the incessant pain. In his memoirs “Inside Memory,” Timothy Findley, who acted with him, recalled that Lawson “always went to bed sodden and all night long he would be dragged from one nightmare to another—often yelling—more often screaming—very often struggling physically to free himself of impeding bedclothes and threatening shapes in the shadows.” He would pound the walls, shouting “Help! Help! Help!” The noise, my dear—and the people.
David Lloyd George, wartime prime minister of Britain, in his memoirs used language like this to describe the conflict:
… [I]nexhaustible vanity that will never admit a mistake … individuals who would rather the million perish than that they as leaders should own—even to themselves—that they were blunderers … the notoriety attained by a narrow and stubborn egotism, unsurpassed among the records of disaster wrought by human complacency … a bad scheme badly handled … impossible orders issued by Generals who had no idea what the execution of their commands really meant … this insane enterprise … this muddy and muddle-headed venture. …
The British Imperial War Museum, which was behind the Jackson film, had no interest in portraying the dark reality of war. War may be savage, brutal and hard, but it is also, according to the myth, ennobling, heroic and selfless. You can believe this drivel only if you have never been in combat, which is what allows Jackson to modernize a cartoon version of war.
The poet Siegfried Sassoon in “The Hero” captured the callousness of war:
“Jack fell as he’d have wished,” the Mother said, And folded up the letter that she’d read. “The Colonel writes so nicely.” Something broke In the tired voice that quavered to a choke. She half looked up. “We mothers are so proud Of our dead soldiers.” Then her face was bowed.
Quietly the Brother Officer went out. He’d told the poor old dear some gallant lies That she would nourish all her days, no doubt. For while he coughed and mumbled, her weak eyes Had shone with gentle triumph, brimmed with joy, Because he’d been so brave, her glorious boy.
He thought how “Jack,” cold-footed, useless swine, Had panicked down the trench that night the mine Went up at Wicked Corner; how he’d tried To get sent home; and how, at last, he died, Blown to small bits. And no one seemed to care Except that lonely woman with white hair.
Our own generals and politicians, who nearly two decades ago launched the greatest strategic blunder in American history and have wasted nearly $6 trillion on conflicts in the Middle East that we cannot win, are no less egotistical and incompetent. The images of our wars are as carefully controlled and censored as the images from World War I. While the futility and human carnage of our current conflicts are rarely acknowledged in public, one might hope that we could confront the suicidal idiocy of World War I a century later.
Leon Wolff, in his book “In Flanders Fields: The 1917 Campaign,” writes of World War I:
“It had meant nothing, solved nothing, and proved nothing; and in so doing had killed 8,538,315 men and variously wounded 21,219,452. Of 7,750,919 others taken prisoner or missing, well over a million were later presumed dead; thus the total deaths (not counting civilians) approach ten million. The moral and mental defects of the leaders of the human race had been demonstrated with some exactitude. One of them (Woodrow Wilson) later admitted that the war had been fought for business interests; another (David Lloyd George) had told a newspaperman: ‘If people really knew, the war would be stopped tomorrow, but of course they don’t—and can’t know. The correspondents don’t write and the censorship wouldn’t pass the truth.’
There is no mention in the film of the colossal stupidity of the British general staff that sent hundreds of thousands of working-class Englishmen—they are seen grinning into the camera with their decayed teeth—in wave after wave, week after week, month after month, into the mouths of German machine guns to be killed or wounded. There is no serious exploration of the iron censorship that hid the realities of the war from the public and saw the press become a shill for warmongers. There is no investigation into how the war was used by the state, as it is today, as an excuse to eradicate civil liberties. There is no look at the immense wealth made by the arms manufacturers and contractors or how the war plunged Britain deep into debt with war-related costs totaling 70 percent of the gross national product. Yes, we see some pictures of gruesome wounds, digitalized into color, yes, we hear how rats ate corpses, but the war in the film is carefully choreographed, stripped of the deafening sounds, repugnant smells and most importantly the crippling fear and terror that make a battlefield a stygian nightmare. We glimpse dead bodies, but there are no long camera shots of the slow agony of those dying of horrific wounds. Sanitized images like these are war pornography. That they are no longer jerky and grainy and have been colorized in 3D merely gives old war porn a modern sheen.
“When the war was not very active, it was really rather fun to be in the front line,” a veteran says in the film. “It was a sort of outdoor camp holiday with a slight spice of danger to make it interesting.”
Insipid comments like that defined the perception of the war at home. The clash between a civilian population that saw the war as “a sort of outdoor camp holiday” and those who experienced it led to profound estrangement. The poet Charles Sorley wrote: “I should like so much to kill whoever was primarily responsible for the war.” And journalist and author Philip Gibbs noted that soldiers had a deep hatred of civilians who believed the lies. “They hated the smiling women in the streets. They loathed the old men. … They desired that profiteers should die by poison-gas. They prayed to God to get the Germans to send Zeppelins to England—to make the people know what war meant.”
Military studies have determined that after 60 days of continuous combat, 98 percent of those who survive will have become psychiatric casualties. The common trait among the 2 percent who were able to endure sustained combat was a predisposition toward “aggressive psychopathic personalities.” Lt. Col. David Grossman wrote: “It is not too far from the mark to observe that there is something about continuous, inescapable combat which will drive 98 percent of all men insane, and the other 2 percent were crazy when they got there.”
The military cliques in American society are as omnipotent as they were in World War I. The symbols of war and militarism, then and now, have a quasi-religious aura, especially in our failed democracy. Our incompetent generals—such as David Petraeus, whose surges only prolonged the Iraq War and raised the casualty figures and whose idea to arm “moderate” rebels in Syria was a debacle—are as lionized as the pig-headed and vainglorious Gen. Douglas Haig, the British commander in chief, who resisted innovations such as the tank, the airplane and the machine gun, which he called “a much overrated weapon.” He believed the cavalry would play the decisive role in winning the war. Haig, in the Battle of the Somme, oversaw 60,000 casualties on the first day of the offensive, July 1, 1916. None of his military objectives were achieved. Twenty thousand lay dead between the lines. The wounded cried out for days. This did not dampen Haig’s ardor to sacrifice his soldiers. Determined to make his plan of bursting through the German lines and unleashing his three divisions of cavalry on the fleeing enemy, he kept the waves of assaults going for four months until winter forced him to cease. By the time Haig was done, the army had suffered more than 400,000 casualties and accomplished nothing. Lt. Col. E.T.F. Sandys, who saw 500 of his soldiers killed or wounded on the first day at the Somme, wrote two months later, “I have never had a moment’s peace since July 1st.” He then shot himself to death in a London hotel room. Joe Sacco’s illustrated book “The Great War,” a 24-foot-long wordless panorama that depicts the first day of the Battle of Somme, reveals more truth about the horror of war than Jackson’s elaborate restoration of old film.
https://www.truthdig.com/articles/peter-jacksons-cartoon-war/
Jackson closes the film with an army ditty about prostitution. “You might forget the gas and shell,” the song goes, “but you’ll nev’r forget the Mademoiselle! Hinky-dinky, parlez-vous?”
Tens of thousands of girls and women, whose brothers, fathers, sons and husbands were dead or crippled, and whose homes often had been destroyed, became impoverished and often homeless. They were easy prey for the brothels, including the military-run brothels, and the pimps that serviced the soldiers. There is nothing amusing or cute about lying on a straw mat and being raped by as many as 60 men a day, unless you are the rapist.
“Give sorrow words,” William Shakespeare reminded us, “The grief that does not speak whispers the o’erfraught heart and bids it break.”
It is fortunate all the participants in the war are dead. They would find the film another example of the monstrous lie that denied their reality, ignored or minimized their suffering and never held the militarists, careerists, profiteers and imbeciles who prosecuted the war accountable. War is the raison d’être of technological society. It unleashes demons. And those who profit from these demons, then and now, work hard to keep them hidden.
https://www.truthdig.com/articles/peter-jacksons-cartoon-war/
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bob-giovanni · 6 years ago
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A Casual Affair - Part 26
Characters: Simon X OFC
Summary: After spending a lot of time getting to know Dodger, Simon decides it’s time he and Violet get to know each other again.
Warnings: Cursing, Angst, Fluff, Smut
Notes: I just realized that there was a six year time jump in this story from when Violet left New York to when Simon tracks her down in San Diego. And there was a six year time jump on The Walking Dead. Did I predict the six year time jump? I think I did. /sarcasm. Also, I’m headed to Walker Stalker Con next week so I may not have another chapter of either story up until after that.
Song for this Chapter: “Reunited” by Peaches & Herb (Playlist Here!)
It had been a little over a month and a half since Violet had introduced Dodger to Simon. So far things were going great. Dodger was calling Simon ‘dad’ and he always gets very excited when he hears that his dad is coming over. Simon had been spending nearly every night at Violet’s house. One Saturday the three of them did go to a nearby park and Violet sat on a bench while Simon and Dodger played on the jungle gym and swing set. Violet had brought a book with her but she barely read it since she was so busy watching Simon and Dodger. Simon really was a good father. Not that Violet had any doubts the he wouldn’t be. She knew how badly he’d wanted this. Violet had even let Simon and Dodger go out alone. It was good that they did as Violet needed time to explain to her family what was going on. They knew that Dodger’s father was Simon, that was old news. But she had to explain that Simon had found her and showed up randomly and that he was getting to know his son. Her father wanted to confront Simon about how he’d treated Violet all those years ago but Violet was able to talk some sense into him.
Violet was currently sitting at her kitchen table across from Dodger while he was eating a snack. She was so happy that he was getting on with Simon. He really seemed to be opening up a lot more. Not that he was closed off before. But he just seemed so much happier than he already had been having Simon around. Violet smiled softly to herself and bit her bottom lip. “Hey, listen, munchkin. Uncle Chris is gonna come over and hang out with you tonight, ok?” Dodger nodded enthusiastically. “Ok! Is my dad coming over too?” “Not tonight, sweetheart. Your dad and I are going out because we have some things that we need to talk about.” “Grown up things?” Violet nodded. “Yes, sweetie, grown up things. So once your Uncle Chris gets here mommy is gonna get ready and then go meet your dad at his hotel. But if you’re good for Uncle Chris tonight then maybe your dad will come over for breakfast tomorrow. How does that sound?” Dodger grinned. “Awesome!” Violet laughed as Dodger slid off his chair and ran to his playroom.
A few minutes later Violet heard her front door open. “Vi?” It was her brother Chris. “I’m in the kitchen.” She replied. Chris walked into the kitchen and sat where Dodger had been sitting a few minutes earlier. “Hey, how are you?” Violet shrugged a bit. “I’m ok. Kinda nervous about tonight.” “Why?” He asked. “It’s been a long time since I’ve spent any time alone with Simon. Things have been going great with him and Dodger and I’m worried that we’ll get in a fight and it’ll mess things up.”  “Well you said he’s a good guy and good father. Even if you guys get in a fight I doubt he’d let it come between him and his son. And I know that you’re not a vindictive person. You’d never keep him from seeing Dodger.” Violet nodded. “I know. I just…it’s gonna be weird seeing him one on one again.” “You’ll be alright, kiddo. You’re a lot stronger than you give yourself credit for.” Chris said reassuringly. Violet smiled and nodded. “I know. I should go get ready. Dodger’s in his playroom.” Violet stood and headed upstairs, smiling to herself when she heard Dodger yell “Uncle Chris!”
Violet opened her closet door and stared at everything for a moment. Her and Simon were getting dinner and drinks, nothing fancy. She didn’t want to overdress or dress provocatively and send the wrong message. She decided on a long sleeved burgundy colored blouse that didn’t show too much cleavage, black jeans, and nude colored flats. She put on a pair of simple gold stud earrings and quickly put on mauve eyeshadow, mascara, and lipgloss. She looked herself over in the mirror as she pulled her wavy hair into a ponytail, biting her bottom lip. She decided that her look was toned down enough and grabbed a black clutch purse from her closet. She put her ID, credit card, cash, phone, and lip gloss inside before heading downstairs. She walked to the playroom and leaned against the doorway. “Hey, munchkin, I’m heading out now.” Dodger stood and ran over to Violet, wrapped his arms around her. “Bye, mommy. I love you.” Violet held him close and leaned down to kiss his forehead. “I love you too. I’ll see you in the morning, ok?” Dodger nodded as he hurried back to his pile of legos and matchbox cars. Chris waved at her. “Have fun. Do you know what time you’ll be home?” Violet shook her head. “I’ll text you and let you know.” She said before heading out.
Violet texted Simon that she was on her way to the hotel and drove towards the highway. She wasn’t too far from where Simon was staying but was far enough that she had time to think on the drive. What if this was a bad idea? In the days leading up to this, Violet could feel herself letting her guard down more and more around Simon. As much as she wanted them to have a normal relationship, it was hard for her. They’d meant so much to each other at one point. She still cared about Simon and she was pretty sure that Simon still cared about her. But their relationship had taken such an emotional toll on her that she hadn’t been able to have a real relationship since. She’d only been with one other person in the six years since she left New York. Sure she had hookups here and there. But it just wasn’t the same. As much as she didn’t want to admit it, Violet could see herself being with Simon again. She tried to shake that thought from her mind as she pulled up in front of Simon’s hotel. She texted him that she was there and moment later he came outside and lightly jogged to her car before climbing in and buckling up. He smiled that bright, warm smile of his. “Hey, how are you?” He asked. Violet smiled and nodded. “I’m good, how are you?” Simon nodded as well. “Not too bad.”
The exchanged small talk as Violet drove to the restaurant. They had decided on a simple Italian place not too far from the hotel. Violet pulled into the parking lot and found a fairly close spot. They climbed out of the car and made their way inside. The hostess seated them at a cozy booth near the back of the restaurant and handed them each a menu. While Violet was looking over the menu, she could feel Simon looking at her. She flicked her eyes upward and saw Simon staring at her over his menu. “What?” She asked softly. Simon smiled and shook his head. “Nothing, just…you look nice. It’s nice seeing you again.” “You’ve seen me pretty much everyday for the last six weeks.” “I know but not like this. All dressed up and what not.” Violet looked over herself. “I’m not that dressed up.” Simon shrugged. “You just look really nice.” Violet blushed a bit and smiled. “Thanks. You look nice too.” A few moments later their waitress came over and took their orders. She returned quickly with a glass of wine for Violet and a beer for Simon.
The conversation started off a little strained at first but they quickly fell into a comfortable rhythm. Simon told Violet about what was going on with his business. He’d added some pretty famous clients to his roster over the years. Violet felt proud hearing him talk about it. She knew how important the business was to him and how hard he worked to build it into what it had become. Simon also told Violet about his brother and sister-in-law having twins and his mother having surgery after taking a bad fall. Violet never got a chance to meet any of Simon’s family but he’d told her a lot about them so she felt like she knew them. He got visibly upset when he talked about his mom. Violet reached over and placed her hand comfortingly over Simon’s. He looked down at her hand before looking up at her. He turned his hand and wrapped his fingers around hers, giving her hand a slight squeeze. Violet blushed a bit and pulled her hand back. Simon smirked a bit and took a sip of his beer. “So, besides having a secret baby, what else have you been up to?” Simon asked Violet.
Violet laughed softly. “Well I’ve been working at a local newspaper for the last couple of years.” “Oh are you a reporter now?” Violet shook her head. “Oh god no. I’m an associate editor.” Simon quirked an eyebrow. “What does an associate editor do?” “I’m a jack of all trades really. I do research and fact checking for stories, I do first draft edits, sometimes come up with headlines. An editor position is opening up soon so I’m hoping to get a promotion.” Simon nodded. “That sounds cool. Do you like it?” Violet smiled a bit. “I do. I really enjoy doing all the research especially when it’s like a really deep investigative piece about a legal issue. I like going to court hearings and reading all the legal briefs.” “Really? That’s awesome. You sound really passionate about it. I’m glad you’re happy.” A moment later the waitress brought their food. They continued talking as they ate and soon enough it felt as if no time had passed at all. Once they were done eating Simon paid the bill against Violet’s wishes. She wanted to split the bill but he insisted on paying.
They left the restaurant and stepped outside. Violet looked up at Simon. “There’s an ice cream shop right down the block. Wanna get dessert?” Simon smiled and nodded. “Yeah that sounds good.” They walked down the block to the crowded ice cream parlor and got in line. Violet got a cone with double chocolate ice cream and Simon got a dish with vanilla topped with rainbow jimmies. They walked outside and sat on a bench so they could eat. The pair were talking about less serious things now like TV and movies. At one point Simon stared at Violet licking her ice cream and let his thoughts drift to a not so clean place. He quickly shook himself out of that thought and blushed a bit once he realized what he was doing. It did not go unnoticed by Violet but she decided it was best not to say anything. After they finished their treats they walked back to the car. Violet drove back to the hotel and pulled up out front a few moments later. Simon looked at the time. “It’s still kinda early. Did you wanna come in a get a drink at the bar?” Violet thought for a moment. She wondered if this would be a good idea. She wanted to keep talking to Simon, she was having a really nice time. But there was part of her that knew that if she went into that hotel with Simon then there was a chance that she’d wind up back in his room. “Fuck it.” Violet thought to herself. She smiled and nodded. “Yeah, ok, sure.”
Simon pointed to where Violet could go to get her car valet parked. She pulled up and the valet opened her door for her. She thanked him as he handed her a ticket for her car. She slipped the ticket into her jean pocket and followed Simon into the hotel and to the bar. They sat on stools at the counter and the bartender walked over to them. “Good evening, folks. What can I get for you?” Simon motioned for Violet to order first. “Umm, I’ll take an apple martini.” The bartender nodded and looked to Simon. “I’ll have Crown Royal, neat, please.” The bartender walked away to prepare their drinks. He set their glasses down in front of them a moment later. “Would you like to open up a tab?” He asked. Simon nodded. “Yes, under room 705, please.” “You got it, sir. Enjoy.” Simon and Violet picked up their glasses and held them up. “Let’s make a toast.” Simon said. Violet smiled. “Ok, to what?” She asked. “To us. To new beginnings, to being friends, to being parents.” Violet laughed softly and clinked her glass against Simon’s before taking a drink.
As the night progressed, Simon and Violet laughed and talked and drank and just enjoyed being around each other. Violet had worried that things would be awkward between them but was relieved that things seemed almost like normal. At one point an older woman, probably in her late 60s, walked up to them while they were mid conversation. “Excuse me, I’m sorry to interrupt your conversation, but I’ve been watching you two and I just had to say that you two remind me of myself and my husband.” Violet furrowed her eyebrows as the woman spoke. “What do you mean?” “My husband and I were very much in love. Even though we were married for almost fifty years it was as if we were still in the honeymoon phase. You two are obviously very in love. It’s very sweet and I wish you both all the happiness in the world.” Violet’s jaw was hanging open a bit as she watched the woman walk away. Once she was out of the bar she and Simon looked at each other for a moment before they started giggling. “That was very strange.” Violet said. Simon finished his whiskey and put his glass on the counter. “Was it?” He asked.
“Um, yeah, it was.” Violet responded. Simon licked his lips. “You think someone seeing the way we’ve been acting and thinking we’re together is weird?” “What do you mean ‘the way we’ve been acting?’” “I mean we’ve been talking and laughing and maybe flirting a little for the last couple of hours.” Violet set her glass down. “Umm, I have not been flirting.” Simon laughed a bit. “Ok, if you say so.” “I haven’t.” She insisted. “Maybe you don’t even realize you’ve been doing it. I mean I don’t blame you because I have been to and I certainly haven’t been rebuffing you. I’ve been enjoying it, if I’m being honest.” Violet finished her drink and reached into her purse to get cash so she could tip the bartender. “This was a bad idea.” She said as she started to get off the stool. Simon stopped her by placing a hand on her side before quickly leaning in to press a soft kiss to her lips. Violet was caught off guard and initially responded by returning the kiss. A flood of emotion overwhelmed Violet at first and the kiss was so familiar. After a few seconds she realized what was going on and quickly pulled away. She stared up at Simon for a moment before quickly sliding off her stool and heading out of the hotel.
Violet walked outside and handed her ticket to the valet. He picked up a walkie talkie and gave someone on the other end the number on her ticket. Violet just stood there and kept replaying what had just happened. She was feeling confused. She told herself over and over again that she didn’t want to get back into it with Simon. But she definitely felt something when he kissed her. Something she hadn’t felt in years. She started questioning herself. Why didn’t she want to get back into it with Simon? Yes, she’d been hurt before. But so many years had passed and Violet knew that Simon was sorry for what had happened between them. Was she punishing herself? Violet had felt so bad about not telling Simon about Dodger that part of her felt like she didn’t deserve love or happiness. A voice in Violet’s head kept yelling at her, “What are you doing? Go get him!” Violet turned to the valet and smiled. “I’m so sorry but can you cancel? I’ve had a little too much to drink and I’m realizing that I probably shouldn’t drive right now.” The valet nodded and handed her back her ticket. “Of course, ma’am. Would you like me to call you a cab?” Violet shook her head. “No thank you. I’m just gonna go back inside.” But Violet wasn’t drunk. She’d never felt more sober in her life. She walked back inside the hotel and headed to the bar. Simon was gone. “Shit.” She was going to text him but then remembered he gave the bartender his room number to set up the tab. “705.” She mumbled to herself before heading to the elevators. She quickly texted her brother to let him know she was getting a room at the hotel because she drank too much and to see if he could spend the night with Dodger at her place. He quickly responded that he could and told her to be safe and feel better.
Violet got on an elevator and hit the button to head to the seventh floor. She started to feel nervous as the elevator approached the correct floor. Once the doors opened she stepped off and followed the sign on the wall to the end of the hall where room 705 was. Violet stood there and just stared at the door for a moment. What was she doing? She immediately turned and started back towards the elevator before stopping. No. She’d come up here for a reason. Even though it felt scary to open herself up again, she knew this was the right thing for her right now. She turned back and walked up Simon’s room, knocking on the door and stepping back a bit. A moment later Simon opened the door and furrowed his eyebrows. “Hey, is everythi-“ Violet cut him off by grabbing his shirt collar and pulling him down into a passionate kiss. Simon immediately wrapped his arms around Violet’s waist and pulled her close. She walked Simon back into his room and kicked the door closed behind her. After a minute Simon pulled back. “Wait, what’s happening?” He asked breathlessly. “I’ve decided to stop punishing myself and let myself be happy again.” “What about before? Downstairs?” Violet shrugged. “You made the first move. It caught me off guard, that’s all.” Simon brought a hand up to cup Violet’s cheek. She could feel herself tear up a little. It’d been so long since he touched her like that. She leaned into the touch. “Are you sure about this?” He asked. Violet smiled and nodded. “I’m positive.” She said before leaning up to kiss Simon sweetly.
As they continued kissing, Violet started to unbutton Simon’s shirt. She ran her hands down his chest and sighed softly when her fingers ran over his still chiseled abs. Simon quickly slipped his shirt off before wrapping his arms around Violet and holding her tightly. She wrapped her arms around his neck as she stood on the tips of her toes to kiss him. After a moment Simon pulled back and pulled Violet’s blouse over her head. She suddenly felt very self conscious and covered her belly with her arms. Simon looked down at her. “Hey, what’s wrong?” He asked. She shook her head. “You’re still in such good shape and I’m so not. This was a horrible idea.” Violet reached for her shirt. Simon sat on the edge of the bed and pulled Violet into his lap. “Hey, listen to me.” He turned her face towards him and pecked her lips a few times. “I told you before that you are the most beautiful woman in the world. I meant it then and I still mean it now. And your body…” He said with a smile as he ran his fingers over her belly. “You carried a child. Our child. Your body is amazing.” Violet’s lips slowly curled into a smile. “You’re still so cheesy.” Simon laughed softly and shrugged. “Some things never change.” Violet adjusted herself so she was straddling Simon’s waist and wrapped her arms around his neck as she kissed him deeply.
As Simon ran his hands over Violet’s exposed skin, she reached down and unbuttoned Simon’s jeans. It was something she’d done dozens of times. It felt so familiar and brought a little smile to her face. Once she had his jeans unbuttoned and unzipped Simon stood and gently placed Violet down on the bed. He kicked off his shoes and socks before pushing his jeans down. Seeing Simon like this again was unreal. He still looked so good. Violet bit her bottom lip as she felt a rush of excitement pulse through her. She squeezed her legs together and moaned softly. That moan was music to Simon’s ears. Violet kicked off her shoes and stood. Simon reached out and unbuttoned her jeans before pushing them down her hips. As soon as Violet’s jeans were off Simon lifted her and wrapped her legs around his waist, kissing her and holding her close as he walked towards the top of the bed. He turned and sat on the edge with Violet once again straddling his waist. He started to kiss along her jaw and down her neck to her chest. Violet reached behind her and unclasped her bra. Simon pulled her bra off and threw it across the room before placing soft kisses over Violet’s breasts. He leaned down and flicked his tongue over her left nipple, causing her to arch her back and grind her hips down against Simon’s. He made a mental that she still enjoyed that. Simon only got a few more flicks in before Violet started to reach into his underwear. “Please, Simon, I need you.” She panted softly.
Simon placed his hands on either side of Violet’s face before leaning in and kissing her deeply. She wrapped her hands around his wrists before moving off of his lap and laying on her back on the bed. Simon kneeled over her and hooked two fingers through the waistband of her panties and pulled them down. Seeing Violet naked again after all this time was surreal. “How could she ever doubt how beautiful she is?” Simon thought to himself. Violet blushed a bit when she notice Simon staring at her. She sat up and pressed a few soft kisses along his toned stomach as she pushed his underwear down, his hardened cock finally springing free. Violet immediately wrapped her hand around Simon’s thick member and pumped her fist slowly a few times. Simon moaned softly and pushed Violet down onto her back once more. Just as he was about to get into position between her legs, he realized something. “Fuck.” “What is it?” Violet asked. Simon sighed heavily. “I don’t have any condoms.” Violet bit her bottom lip. “It’s ok. I have an IUD.” “What about…ya know, other stuff?” He asked. Violet sat up again and placed her hands on Simon’s shoulders. “I trust you. Do you trust me?” Simon nodded. “Of course I do.” “Then I’m good.” “Me too.” Violet kissed Simon and wrapped her arms around his neck, bringing him down on top of her as she laid back.
Simon pressed his tip to her entrance, groaning when he felt how wet she was. “Are you ready for me?” Violet whimpered softly and nodded. “God, yes.” Simon reached down and wrapped a hand around his dick as he guided himself into Violet’s tight heat. The feeling was more intense than he could’ve imagined. It was familiar but overwhelming because he never thought he’d be with her like this again. As Simon entered Violet, her eyes rolled back and she gasped softly. She’d forgotten how good Simon felt inside her. Simon stilled his hips once he was completely inside Violet and pressed his forehead against hers. She placed hand in the back of Simon’s neck and gently threaded her fingers in his hair. After a moment Simon started to slowly thrust his hips. Violet licked her lips and moaned as Simon thrusted into her. “Oh god…” Violet breathed out as she hooked her feet around Simon’s thighs. Simon moaned as he started to thrust faster. He leaned down and kissed Violet passionately, slipping his tongue past her lips. Violet whimpered and dug her nails into Simon’s back. “Faster.” She begged softly. Simon started to thrust his hips faster, pushing himself up on his forearms so he could angle his hips better.
Violet let out a high pitched moan as Simon’s cock began hitting her g spot. “Right there, baby. Fuck, don’t stop.” Simon groaned and hooked his left arm under Violet’s right leg and lifted it up so he could thrust even deeper. Violet’s entire body was trembling with pleasure. She hadn’t felt this good in years. Simon began thrusting faster and harder still keeping his hips angled to hit Violet’s spot. Simon could feel his release getting closer. He reached down and used two fingers to start quickly circling Violet’s swollen clit, causing her to whimper loudly. He grunted as he thrusted into Violet. “Fuck, I’m so close, baby.” He moaned. Violet leaned up and started to kiss along Simon’s jaw. She took his earlobe between her teeth and tugged gently. She remembered that he used to like it and based on the sound he made when she did it, he still liked it. “I’m so close…don’t stop…” She moaned into his ear. Simon’s thrusting became erratic. He held on as long as he could. Two more hard, deep thrusts pushed Violet over the edge. Her walls clenched around Simon’s member as a powerful orgasm caused her whole body to spasm. Seconds later Simon came inside Violet, groaning loudly as he filled her with his release.
The pair laid there for a few moments, their limbs tangled and beads of sweat covering their bodies as they both panted heavily. Once Simon finally regained his composure he slowly slipped out of Violet and laid next to her. She rolled out of the bed and headed to the bathroom to clean herself up. She returned a few minutes later, smiling when she saw Simon laying on his back, one arm behind his head as the bedsheets barely covered his lower half. She was overwhelmed with deja vu seeing him like that. She walked over and climbed into the bed, covering herself with the sheet. Simon turned on his side and wrapped his arms around Violet, pulling her close. He tucked some hair behind her ear before leaning in to kiss her sweetly. Violet melted into it. As she laid there she had a realization. In the last six years, Violet had one serious relationship and plenty of opportunities for others, but they never worked out. She couldn’t quite figure out why before but now she knew. It’s because none of them were him. No matter how much she may not have wanted to admit it, Simon was her one true soulmate. Now that he was here she couldn’t let him go again. Almost as if he read her mind, Simon kissed Violet’s forehead and smiled. “You know that I’m yours, right? You have me forever.” Violet smiled and nodded. “I know.” As they cuddled and slowly drifted off to sleep, Violet had one last thought. She wasn’t entirely sure how all of this was going to work out, but she did know that this time she wasn’t going to give up without a fight.
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