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dykedvonte · 2 months ago

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You ever just see a Mouthwashing take that makes you want to bang your head into a wall? I literally just saw someone claim Curly couldn't have been emotionally abused by Jimmy before the crash because he was in a higher position of power than Jimmy.

-Shrimp Anon

The mouthwashing fandom has shown me that people genuinely do believe that certain types of abuse are not as detrimental as other types especially when they deem those immune/resistant, ergo, believing one is objectively worse no matter how it affects the person nor the intersections of power, history and dynamics at play.

Get ready cause this is a yap session:

Cause like it's heavily implied that Curly and Jimmy's friendship was toxic and abusive, pointedly in the direction of how Jimmy uses Curly's belief/comfort in him. Curly wasn't forced to enable Jimmy but he was emotional and mentally on edge around him in almost every scene in some way. Mental and emotional abuse are not contingent on what positions you have at work. Yeah, he's Jimmy's boss but he was Jimmy's friend first and it's like getting into Psych discussion to talk about how social power tends to overshadow any perceived organizational power in the human mind. People are concerned about their jobs ofc but they tend to hang onto and put more value/investment into their personal relationships, hence why there tends to be laws and restrictions around mixing the two.

I always see the sentiments that "Curly is a grown ass man", "Curly is bigger than Jimmy", "Curly is Jimmy's boss", "He just needed a backbone" as criticisms of Curly and while I do agree that on the surface level all of these to be true and viable ways Curly could've taken more control of the situation, I often look at the parallels of Anya and Curly as victims of Jimmy pre/post crash.

The way Jimmy talks to Anya post crash is how he talked to Curly in the pre-crash segments. It's hard to pin-point mainly because we know he hates and wants nothing to do with Anya compared to his contrary but similarly handled obsessions with Curly. It's a weird sort of "honey-moon" effect of abuse Jimmy does in terms of emotional and mental victimization. He is always horrid to Anya, always talking down or questioning her abilities and thoughts in a situation, this of course includes the harassment and assault. However, he has a moment of attempted gentleness/conditioning when he question her about the mouthwash when she's contemplating drinking it at the table. The key difference is he has no personal investment in Jimmy outside wanting nothing to do with him, meaning there is no sort of romanticized version of him that he can condition her off of. He knows this, hence, why he always reverts to trying to make her to scared to oppose him.

This sort of give and take of "kindness" doesn't work on her because she knows he is just doing it to take more from her than whatever he could possibly give but it reflects even the "softer" scenes between him and Curly where he always rewords or rephrases Curly's sentiments and concerns to sound more shallow. He is feigning a deeper understanding by reworking Curly's emotions into something bad and needing to be hidden. Everything is laced with envy and resentment, an outburst just around the corner, I mean he even slams the table in the birthday party scene, a tactic in emotional manipulation to set the victim on edge and cloud their ability to respond. Even if Curly knows Jimmy won't get physical in that moment, the physical actions is intended to make him back down in the confrontation in case it does. This is something that is just not person specific. It ingrains itself into how you interact with the world and life and it shows in major and minor ways with Curly.

Post-crash, the abusive nature is more in tandem to the physical victimization Anya went through and the stripping of voice and autonomy we see take place. Like the parasite in HFIM, Jimmy speaks for Curly most of the time and puts words in his mouth, similarly to how he takes Anya's plans as his own. He very commonly, with the both of them mind you, supplements the worst aspects of himself into them; pettiness, selfishness, lack of understanding... And tries to cover himself with their best qualities; kindness, planning, initiative, etc...

These parallel are just to say that positional power has little to do with if a person can be abused and how it can even be flipped to further the abuse. There is no doubt that Curly could've picked up on Jimmy's envy of his position hence another reason he never confronted him as a Captain but as a friend as doing so would immediately put Jimmy in a space to be confrontational/combative.

I think the disdain some people have when they talk about the heavily implied if not implicitly stated emotional/mental abuse Curly experienced being Jimmy's friend is when treating it as an excuse to why he didn't do more. I can understand that completely because it is not an excuse to why he didn't do more but is a very real reason people in his position in these scenarios can experience whether in the context of a work or social environment. However, I also think the way people talk about it really does demonstrate a bigger problem when talking about abuse when somehow who is/was abused is either part of the issue or enabled it.

Harkening back to the sentiments about Curly's inaction regarding Jimmy, I think the exact phrases I used/have seen show how there is an inherent belief that it is easier to overpower the effects of emotional/mental abuse that go in tandem with the perception of Curly as someone who should be able to. There is not an age you suddenly stop being susceptible to abuse nor a set point or low where you realize how it has affected you. You don't suddenly know to stand up or put a face on to face your abuser nor admit that you inadvertently enabled them to subjugate someone else to the same treatment. Maybe it's my psych brain but their is this growing belief that direct action is somehow easy or always the best method with the game shows you instances where it is not always the case. In real life that rings true too. He should have done more, but it's not impossible to see why he struggled to find a way or didn't even if it makes us mad.

It's not easy to suddenly gain a "back-bone". You don't immediately want to resort to aggression, especially if it mirrors the type you were a victim to. You don't want to believe you allowed yourself to be treated this bad, let it get that bad or allowed something bad to happen to someone else. It is easy to be in denial, to retreat to your thoughts or make excuses to avoid the painful truth. It's frustrating but in a way we know is relatable. It why we both hate and love Curly for it. We know we'd be better, we think we'd be better, we like to think we wouldn't falter in the same ways but it's always easier to say that from the outside looking in. It's easy to see what he was doing wrong because we are seeing it, not him, but the game really does make you picture what you would do if this was your raw reality and it's why this debate about Curly seems so never ending/contradictory. We can all say what we'd do but bottom line is that's much different when you're in the moment with all the emotions and human feelings attached.

I personally think Mouthwashing tackles the themes of rape culture, enabling, toxic masculinity, types of abuse and patriarchy in ways that are meant to deconstruct the typical straightforward views we mostly have of these concepts and how little subtilities of them are just as, if not more, detrimental than the overt/obvious parts. The game deals with the idea of little details and bigger picture in a way to show that sometimes the bigger picture is not the issue but the little details that make it up. It's why I have a personal dislike of depictions of Jimmy as the typical horrible person who would of course do something like this because the game is about noticing the little warning signs, the foreshadowing and foresight.

It's why I dislike the typical discussion of "bro code" and "boys will be boys" for the game because the game makes a point to avoid the standard depictions of such. It is about the type of men who still enable despite not condoning, agreeing or even perpetuating harmful beliefs because they can't see the little details or the ways it seeps into their everyday. The severity is not obvious to them as it was not obvious to Curly, Swansea or even Daisuke the way it was to a woman like Anya. There are little details about Jimmy that should ring alarms but if you are too naive like Daisuke, too distant like Swansea or too conditioned like Curly, they are just off markers.

There is 100% more constructive/concise ways to say "Curly was a victim of Jimmy's abuse on an emotional and mental aspect that clouded his judgements and perceptions in the scenario" while also critiquing on the side of "Curly still had a responsibility to protect Anya as a crew mate and Captain that he failed to do due to biases and stigma's he failed to surpass" without the weird condemnation people give him about should've knowing better than to let himself be manipulated by a person he considered a close, if not family/best-friend and had his own reasons to trust initially. Also stop being weird about victims of abuse in general with this fandom, like sorry not everyone has a like social epiphany the moment someone's nasty to them. People are treating it like you immediately know when you are in a toxic relationship immediately or comprehend when a person is actively dangerous and either it's your fault for not knowing how to leave/cut them off or you deserve it. Like the hypocrisy of people believing how certain fans treat the story reflect their irl views but not their own is crazy.

End statement is: I honestly don't even know man, I've been writing this too long and just like no man on that ship was perfect or really helped Anya when it mattered and I feel like pitting them against each other in discussion on who did the least or most or how it was justified sucks cause in the end Anya always did the most and best thing for herself.

#i also think it is because mouthwashing is first and foremost a game about rape culture and the patriarchy especially in work spaces #regarding women and centering conversation around Curly a man rubs people wrong because it does overshadow that commentary #but it still mixes other topics into its initial theming and message on how abuse conditions you to accept certain things that are harmful #and how getting used to a culture/enviornment does not mean you are happy healthy or most importantly safe in it. I personally like to #explore those aspects where it mixes all the themes so we can discuss the ways you have to watch out for things because there is a differen #in the idea Curly enabled Jimmy just because they were bros and because he was an example of another man afraid to step out from what #is a still oppressive system that does try to punish those who act against it even if they fall in the category of those who would benefit #from it as Jimmy and PE 100% represent that sort of misogynistic system where men that would be “good” are altered until they follow line #in a way both on the personal and professional level as PE is the corporate lock out and Jimmy represents the social and its just the issue #that the discussion of it sounds like “in defense of men” when I am more so trying to discuss how it is much deeper than men being scared t #upset other men but complacency is rewarded by not becoming another person subjugated hence as all the moments Curly does try to do #something we can tie it back to how Jimmy reacts and a possible penality from PE where we now need to address the ways to combat those #two concepts so we dont get cases like Curly or Daisuke or Swansea where male avoidance of the issue is considered neutral or even good.#i think most of this boils down the perfect victim mentality to where if someone who underwent or is being abused is not a perfect example #or accpetible type than their abuse can not be considered a valid or substantial reason for effects on their behavior compounded with the #fact that Anya's abuse at the hands of Jimmy is a systematic issue that Curly is a part of even if unwillingly and was more physically #violating and topical cause sometimes i have to remind myself that all media is still critiqued through the lens of the culture it came out #in cause i do think about what if this game came out inlike 2014 like the conversations would be sooooooo different could you imagine it?#but back the before statement Curly isn't perfect but I feel like boiling it down if hes a good person or man is not the point of the game #but more so good people can still be part of the problem and the idea of condemning a person for one act creates a false sense of #rightouesness and justice that does not aid the victim and in fact aids the abusers in escaping blame for their mulitple behaviors as we se #how the men on the ship tend to blame Jimmy for just one act against them including himself while there is a plethora of things Anya is #concerned about with Jimmy #and its not that Curly just made one mistake with Jimmy but more so we consider his actions more damning because he didn't stop Jimmy #instead of focusing on the fact Jimmy did what he did regardless of Curly and the consequence because we already know he's bad n maladjuste #which is problem in the conversation where the individuals are blamed but the system and perputrator are overlooked in a sense of acceptiab #complacency as we know how they are and the lack of tangibility to personally affect them on a larger scale like I should just make a post #on like cutting out the face when it comes it confronting systems of oppression rather than tag talking but just ask me to clarify if #you want that like im jus trying to say we avoid talking about Jimmy and PE so much cause it is obvious what they do wrong that we make #the initial and inherent problem out to be one aspect someone in this case Curly does and the the constraints they use to force actions

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thirdtimed · 3 months ago

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thinking about the jimmy scar pearl venn diagram and absolutely just disintegrating over it

#(obligatory: as characters)#was extensively rambling to myself in discord when i realized the lifers who anguish me most narratively are those three #(out of the ones that i am familiar with anyways)#thinking about this more and getting so inconsolably sad. hey guys does the loneliness ever eat you alive #the ostracization the isolation the shame the guilt the desperate continual want & desire for genuine human connection #only to be categorically denied it at every turn #to be mocked because you cannot fly though you desperately try. and you fall each and every single time #to be so easily discarded because you will always die first. a truth so widely accepted you almost start to believe in it too #because being a ''good person'' just simply isn't how you play this game #because it's a fundamental truth of this world that you always play the role of the villain. why start acting differently now?#you were left behind and abandoned and locked up. thrown inside that tower to rot.#your hair will never be long enough to let down so you cut it all off. and when you start yelling & screaming & drawing blood because of it #it only further convinces everyone else that this was the right decision #because you're a danger. a menace. a demon. and you will only ever hurt the ones you love #Hey. Hi. Hello #Hey guys. i need jimmy to win so so so so so so badly

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would-you-punt-them · 6 months ago

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I just want to tell you this:

Thank You So, SO Much for informing people about the horrid Mr. Beast situation occurring within his Squid Game Beast Games.

I don’t think would’ve known about this awful and disgusting event occurring as much as I do now if you didn’t post about it on this blog.

Thank you.

I do think it isn't something that should be brushed under the rug, and I also feel that the more people know about it, the worse it becomes for Jimmy when the Beast Games show actually comes out.

One thing I forgot to include in the post is that the Las Vegas shoot is going to be uploaded on YouTube as an extended qualifier to the actual show on Amazon Prime.

It's worth noting that the contestants didn't know that until they arrived at the stadium. They'd been told that the Las Vegas shoot was the Amazon show, and there would only be 1,000 competitors (which is how it is marketed by Amazon). They only learned that the player-count had doubled and this wasn't going to be on Prime once they were on set, and were shown a video message from Jimmy saying he forgot to mention that actually there were 2,000 people and this wasn't the Amazon show (though MrBeast later claimed that this was always the intent).

I don't know when the video(s) will be uploaded, but I honestly can't wait because I'm dying to know how they're planning on editing the footage to cut out the horrors that took place during the challenges.

Like, how are they going to show the Red team losing the first challenge with the rope and pulley? On the one hand, surely they've got to show the 400 people who were eliminated in that challenge. But on the other hand... what exactly do they have to work with?

The production team refused the Red team's pleas to stop the challenge and demanded they keep going to the end, presumably because they needed them to do it for the sake of the video. Instead, anti-capitalist icons that they are, the entire team abandoned the challenge mid-way anyway so they could go help their teammates who were literally being strangled, throwing the game. And once they'd abandoned the rope, they never picked it up again.

Obviously, the producers can't show competitors being throttled. But that means that they also can't explain why the Reds lost the challenge. If the throttling happened toward the end, maybe they'll be fine, but if it happened closer to the middle, there's no way for them to explain why those 400 people just gave up so early.

It also presumably means any overhead shots of all the teams are ruined, because that would require them to explain why the Reds just aren't participating.

Maybe they could show the Reds giving up, but give a different reason. But no reason I can think of works. If they say they "tried their best but knew they couldn't win", they would then also have to answer the question of why the challenge was impossible for them - the reason being that their team of 400 consisted of about 380 women, while their opposing teams consisted almost entirely of the youngest and strongest male competitors.

And I'm not sure how they're going to explain that, because if they show the challenge of everyone going for coloured jerseys, they can't reveal why the teams ended up so unbalanced, as the actual reason is that the male contestants were hoarding jerseys and were physically violent against the female and elderly contestants, and organised themselves to guarantee they were all on the same team, resulting in a gender split.

I'm also not sure how they plan to edit around challenges like the briefcase game, where in the middle of the cramped field the male contestants were attacking and trampling the women. It's going to take a lot of editing to cut around that. And while they can edit out the injuries occurring they can't edit out the fact that by the end of the challenge there are suspiciously fewer female contestants remaining than there were to begin with.

Additionally, they're going to have to justify why the contestants started off so diverse in gender and age, only for the 1,000 who made it to the actual Amazon show predominantly being young and male, without it becoming clear that no one else had any chance. They can't introduce new contestants to re-diversify the cast, because 1,000 were promised by Amazon, 1,000 qualified, and people will complain if they try to fudge the numbers or cheat by introducing last-minute entries, which is especially bad now that he's currently under fire for allegedly faking and rigging competitions.

Jimmy also can't just not upload it at all, because then he'd have to explain that as well, and this is such a massive event people, both fans and detractors, are going to notice.

The more people know about it, the worse his situation becomes, because there's just no way out of it without inviting questions he doesn't want people to know the answers to.

While this is obviously too much to hope for in this timeline, in an ideal world enough people start talking about this that Amazon cancels his show due to the controversy - Jimmy has said Beast Games is intended to be his break into more traditional media, and I think it would be nice to shut that down.

#asks #not a poll #mr beast #eat the rich

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kerink · 3 months ago

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i want to talk about this idea the fandom has that curly didn't do anything to help anya. the fact of the matter is, curly didn't do anything to help anya on screen.

when we first join the conversation, anya's already told curly about the assault and is just updating him on her pregnancy status. we're never privy to what that first conversation looked like, what anya said or how curly responded or what decisions were made about it. but given that anya confided in him twice more about the situation (that she was pregnant and later that she had told jimmy), i have to assume his response to the initial assault disclosure was sufficient enough in her eyes that she knew she could continue confiding in him.

this exchange reads to me like "what to do about the assault" has been an on-going conversation between them, but curly has limited options to help her. but if he could figure out something to do, he'd do it.

let's look at the options available:

report it to HR. i don't think this option is very viable for a few reasons:

first, pony express doesn't seem to care about its employees. there aren't locks on their bedroom doors, there's only enough food and oxygen to get them from port to port with no emergency allotment, there are more crew than cryopods, they're not allowed to sleep for more than 5 hours a night, etc. i don't think they would have done anything to support her even if they had reported it.

HR may even blame anya for the assault, they may say that it happened because of something she did or did not do. it's her responsibility to take, not theirs.

second:

(thank you to @mudstoneabyss for pointing this one out to me)

curly needs this money because he's considering changing careers, which is likely to result in a pay cut or some amount of time job-hunting without income. swansea has a family back home he needs to provide for. it's daisuke's first year on the job and what a piss-poor welcome a pay cut would be, and he's an intern so the pay cut may be all or most of his salary. jimmy is living in poverty. anya has no savings.

it's entirely possible anya asked curly not to file an HR complaint not only because it would make her financial situation worse, but because she doesn't want to ask him, swansea, and daisuke to literally pay for jimmy's actions.

third:

even if curly did file an HR report he may have been told to do nothing. it's a long trip and they need all hands on deck to make the delivery on time! productivity over employee welfare. it's his job to keep the peace but keep jimmy working.

given how much stress curly's shown to be under, it can be assumed being captain is an extremely taxing job with a lot of both assigned duties and off-book duties. it may not actually be feasible to run the ship without a co-pilot.

maybe all he could do was talk to him.

2. go to the police. are there even police in space? i have to assume so because the alternative poses way too many questions. so there's space police. curly and anya call them and they come to the tulpar and dock on the ship and do an investigation and what happens to that limited food and air supply? the late delivery fee?

i'm a psychologist and my first psychology job was working as a crisis counselor for my county. my primary job was to sit with rape survivors as they had their rape kits done and support them as they made their reports to the police. this may not be true everywhere or across the board or in this dystopia but in my experience the police won't take a rape case seriously, or will have limited options to prosecute, or maybe won't even take the case at all without a rape kit.

so curly and anya call the police. they're going to have to file with HR too, to let the company know what's going on. and now anya has to pay for an HR complaint, a late delivery, and a rape kit.

is she going to get this paycheck at all?

3. curly acts on his own accord. this is the one that makes the least amount of sense to me, personally.

if curly just beats the shit out of jimmy then what? now jimmy's mad and embarrassed and takes it out on anya. we're going to confront him and risk making her suffering worse?

curly can't lock jimmy in his quarters for the duration of the trip not only because, as i said, maybe having a co-pilot is necessary for the ship to operate, but there are not locks on the doors.

curly can't lock him in the cargo hold because a) pony express would probably be beyond pissed off about that and who knows if the crew's pay would get docked or curly would get fired or if dragonbreath would sue them all for property damage and contamination. b) how do we get food and water to him? let him go to the bathroom? we open the doors and he busts out and who knows how violent he'll be then.

curly isn't going to kill him because a) that's one of his oldest friends, and i don't care what he's done or how angry curly is or how badly he wants to help anya, i really don't think it's realistic to think he'd be able to separate the anger from the love enough to end his life. b) it's cold-blooded, premeditated murder. it'd be one thing if curly caught jimmy in the act and killed him in defense of anya, he could maybe get away with that. but after the event is over? curly's going to jail for that, possibly for the rest of his life. if you worked at the post office and a coworker told you your best friend since childhood raped her are you clocking out and going to his house and killing him? it's not reasonable. i'm also just really floored how often i've seen this option brought up on the "prison reform abolish the police no matter how bad you are you still deserve human rights" website.

i also don't think it's reasonable, realistic, or kind to ask curly to act on his own accord without consulting anya. for curly to go against her wishes or act without her consent, that's further taking agency away from her. that's another man deciding what happens in her life. even if curly wanted to beat jimmy up or lock him away or kill him, maybe anya asked him not to.

so i ask, what was curly supposed to do? what did he and anya explore as options? what did anya ask him to do? we don't know and we'll never know. and that was intentional on wrong organ's part.

i don't say any of this to discount or discredit conversations or explorations or analyses about the role The Boys Club, toxic masculinity, and bro culture play into the plot, themes, narrative, or personal take-away players have. i fully 100% agree with, support, and endorse those narrative because despite everything i just said above, it's also true that curly is partially responsible.

it's true that he was irresponsible and an enabler for helping jimmy cheat on his psych exam, but there's no evidence at all that he's a conspirator to sexual assault and abuse, that he was going to cover for jimmy in a court of law. all he said was they would figure it out, and that could mean a whole lot of things.

i think curly has some percentage of the blame for what happened on the tulpar, i just don't think that percentage is as large of a number as a lot of people seem to believe. i'm not asking that we forgive or apologize or absolve curly, what i am asking is that we try to look at the situation with more nuance and empathy and good faith.

i don't think curly was a bad man or a bro who was ignoring anya and covering for jimmy's actions. but i also don't think he did enough to help her. he was never good at seeing the small details amongst the larger picture. he couldn't see jimmy for the dead pixel he was.

i think curly was sleep deprived, possibly under-fed, definitely overworked, and juggling too many balls with not enough options. i think he made the wrong choice, but i think he thought it was the lesser of the evils.

#mouthwashing #mouthwashing game #mouthwashing spoilers

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phemiec · 2 months ago

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A Mouthwashing (and How Fish is Made) fansong, unfortunately from Jimmy’s POV mostly, sorry. 🐴 Music and lyrics by me, PhemieC

NOTE: this is my first fansong in five years, and sad to say but my voice has been decimated by illness in the last few years, so please don’t go into this expecting it to sound the same as my old stuff.

That being said, I have released an instrumental version, and I would LOVE to hear covers from other vocalists! Feel free to post and sell if you make a cover as well. <3

LYRICS UNDER CUT

[verse 1] Momma bird sleeping and her nest is empty Pretty and clean I feel the crease of envy Cutting a line right through the sky above me Healthy and green just like a good tree should be Momma bird leaving now her eggs are lonely Out from the underbrush I creep so slowly I’ll lay my own, her home is sound and safe, he’s Grey like a stone among her round blue babies She’ll never tell if she’s a few shells lighter Quick cracking clever comes my little fighter Babes that feel safer they hatch so much slower Thrown down below then by my own fast grower Momma returns to feed her only child he Smells like a stranger and he cries so loudly Drinks of his fill while I look up on proudly Picking away at the discarded bounty

[chorus] What hides inside has the skill to thrive Do you have the will to decide to survive? A parasite needs you alive To feed their growing appetite

[verse 2] Thing crawling thirsty, shared flesh, a blessing Drink of my stagnancy, the taste refreshing Carry a part of me and keep on climbing Top of the ladder’s just a place for dying Dread in your gullet, ignore it, buddy Lead in the bullet, it’s harmless, mostly Let me consume you, let you defend me Curling protector, my friendly fresh meat Im in control now and I like the feeling I’ll play the role of every wound you’re healing Follow the leader was always my thing Swallow your pills and lay still, unwrithing Master of puppets is my one objective Real apex predators can be selective Relay your message, it won’t stop the spread if I replace your tongue when I open your head up

[chorus] What hides inside has the skill to thrive Do you have the will to decide to survive? A parasite keeps you alive To feed their growing appetite

[verse 3] My stress relief, she keeps asking questions I can’t believe she thinks I’ll learn her lesson Nothing outside of me will ever get in No mocking birdie with an unblinking grin Four beating hooves, I hate to hear them thunder Trample the metal tomb I’m buried under braying beast, neighing in the womb inside her Breaking its legs to glue you back together

[chorus] What hides inside has the skill to thrive Do you have the will to decide to survive? A parasite needs you alive To feed their growing appetite…

#Mouthwashing #music #phemiec #Fansong #I’m proud of the instrumentation and lyrics #but the vocals are…….#well #it is what it is #Bandcamp

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mochiwrites · 3 months ago

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Grian is a hypocrite. He knows. God, does he know it. He’d never acknowledge that fact, however, would never admit to it. He isn’t exactly the type that goes around readily confessing his flaws, after all.

He had told Jimmy he wouldn’t restart the session if he died, right after he’d been knocked down a few lives. Grian said it without hesitation, as amusement spilled from his voice like it had been paint in a can that tipped over. It wouldn’t be fair, nor right, to restart the session. And if he restarted it for Jimmy, what kind of message would that send the others? It might become expectation if someone permanently died so early on.

He needed to be firm about it—even if Jimmy’s misfortune came from bad luck, things out of his control.

Grian can’t go giving out special favors. He can’t be biased.

He’s a hypocrite for it.

It happens on the mountain, right by the long staircase made of soft pink cherry wood. He doesn’t even notice at first, attempting to avoid his personal harbinger, a snail. Honestly, Grian didn’t mean for things to go this badly. As with most things with him, Grian thought it to be a silly joke. A hat tip toward a well known hypothetical query.

But in typical fashion, Grian overestimated his friends’ survival capabilities. With their own personal snails tailing them constantly, he watched as death after death rolled in, giggling over each one (unless it was Mumbo or Skizz).

Maybe by now he should know better.

“Who would make my snail invisible?! Who would boobytrap my snail like that?!”

Grian looks over at Lizzie, both flabbergasted and impressed, “That’s—that’s devious.”

The second he turns, it happens.

(Sandy domes under their feet, a ravine cutting right through their path. Mischievous giggles shared between them before they’re torn apart, the sound coming to an abrupt end.

With a shout he pushes his hand out, but to no avail. Yellow turns to red and all that’s left are their foot prints in sand, a pile of items below.

He’s left at the top, lips curling around the syllables of a name as hysteric laughter follows it, distress wrapping around it like a ring.

He never did manage to catch him.)

Grian is a hypocrite, because the moment Scar dies right in front of him, he panics. That invisible snail wasn’t Lizzie’s. It was Scar’s. He stops, breath cutting itself short on its own blade, body freezing itself in ice. He gets a second of eye contact with the man, seeing the shock and fear lacing his expression before he’s gone.

“Oh, Scar!” The outcry is loud as it crackles with distress.

This is it, he’s on his final life now. If he dies it’s permanent. No do overs. No restarts. No special favors. Scar will die. Grian can’t stomach the thought, can’t let it happen. He’s failed every other time and this world has only just begun. It’s too early. It’s… it’s not fair.

END THE SESSION. END THE SESSION! END IT. SAVE HIM. END END END END END END END!

Grian is a hypocrite.

Whether it be out of some sort of twisted and tangled guilt, or the lingering feeling of a debt to Death that never truly went fully repaid, he isn’t sure. There is no hesitation, just a natural instinct, an ingrained habit. If it were anyone else he’d let it happen, let the game run its course.

But his choice is obvious when it comes to Scar, even when he doesn’t want it to be. He’s always going to be drawn to him, always going to feel this pull. He’ll sacrifice it all, twist himself up in however many different contradictions he needs.

For Scar.

“The session is over!” he shouts, rapidly typing in the world chat for the others. He spams the message a few times in his hurry before switching to turn the wild card off. And he does it just in time, with Scar’s snail just a few inches away from the man. It disappears, along with the others, and a collective sigh of relief is released from those among them.

He feels Them watching, unhappy with their meal being cut short. But Grian doesn’t care. He never has.

“Man, that was a close one! I thought I was a goner,” Scar laughs over to his side, drawing Grian’s attention. “Thanks for the quick save there, G-man.”

Grian smiles at him, some small thing. “Don’t get used to it,” he returns.

There’s a knowing look in Scar’s now ruby eyes, and the sun on Grian’s hair feels warmer; heated, nostalgic. “Of course.”

He’s not supposed to play favorites, not meant to be biased. He’s not supposed to interfere to keep a player alive (something he made very clear to Mumbo and Skizz prior). But existing in a world like this without Scar feels wrong and near painful so early on. He couldn’t stand around and do nothing. He couldn’t just watch.

Not when it’s Scar.

Grian pretends not to notice the glance Jimmy throws at them, a brow raised. He’s been seen right through.

#mochi writes #wild life spoilers #wild life smp #scarian #desert duo #trafficshipping #I might rewrite this because I kind of hate it but #needed to go a little crazy over grian ending after scar went red #god #what is wrong with him #maybe I’ll talk more about it tmrw

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jambalaya-enthusiast · 2 months ago

Note

Just had another Jimmy thought...

If Curly had a daughter he would definitely introduce Jimmy as an uncle of sorts... Cutting it short once shes of age Uncle Jimmy about to get a whole lot creepier.

First he pulls you on his lap while He and your dad Curly are watching football or something, and you feel something but you dont say anything... but your dad needed to run to the store to grab some more beer. -Cupcake anon

Your own age.

Uncle! Jimmy x Curly's Daughter! Reader.

warnings: age gap(reader is an adult),toxic relationship themes, jimmy is a major creep, non-consensual touching. curly is an oblivious single father.

a/n; cupcake anon, you're a fucking genius. love you for sharing this prompt with me,hope I was able to do it justice!

It wasn't fun being a well respected captain's daughter. Especially after your mom left, your dad would leave for shipments for months on end,and you had to spend a good chunk of your childhood with nannies rather than your parents.

But that was when he came along,Jimmy... Or Jim,as your dad would call him. He was your dad's closest friend since childhood,and now he was gonna be... Living with the two of you? Your dad said that it was due to the shortage of leases on the market currently,but you know damn well it was because that jimmy person was just a broke guy.

"hey,so you're the daughter I keep hearing my friend talk about,huh?".

"uh yeah,my name is y/n".

"y/n huh? well that's a pretty name for a pretty little girl".

you did think it was strange as to how,Jimmy... or well,uncle jimmy as your dad advised you to call him, was so Frank and open minded with you,but you realised that's just how men in his situation were. Open-minded,and careless.

Uncle jimmy... was an interesting man to say the least,you hadn't really had the luck of having any fun 'relatives' for that matter so you thought this was the best as it was gonna get. Jimmy would offer you cigarettes. Something that your father had clearly mentioned in front of him was off limits for you.

"C'mon aren't you a big girl now? some rules are meant to be broken y'know?

"but dad would kill me if he ever found out..."

"it's alright,it will be our little secret".

All in all you started warming up to him,you thought that hey,this guy is already down on his luck,and he's also so fun to be around! wouldn't hurt to be friendly with him.

It didn't matter how unnecessarily long his hugs were,or how suffocating they were. he would always hug you so tight that you had to physically wriggle your way out of his grasp. on some occasions you could've sworn you heard him say something under his breath.

It didn't matter how he would stare at you for long periods of time if the two of you were in the same room,you thought maybe it's just a middle aged man thing

It didn't matter how during road trips,he would sit in the backseat beside you instead of sitting beside his best friend in the front. How somehow his hands would always find it's way to be on your thigh.

He was a fun guy after all! He lets you drink,smoke,and sneak out. Do all the things which your dad would have crucified you for.

Seeing both of you so close would have your dad asking you—

"wow you sure are having fun with uncle jimmy,huh? you guys seem to be close".

"yeah he's so cool! it's super fun to be around him".

"fun huh? Well im hoping it's a good kind of fun,honey".

But curly shouldn't be worried! His best friend was just taking care of his daughter... Right? He wouldn't do anything,wrong... Right? That much faith curly should have in his best friend... Should he not?

Your dad and uncle had a habit of watching football games during weekend nights,and you decided to join them one such night.

While watching the game,jimmy suddenly turned to you,and said.

'oi y/n, c'mere and sit" as he motioned towards his lap,he turned towards curly and said. "For old times sake,eh? You remember how I used to carry ya around? I'm feelin nostalgic".

Curly was already feeling tipsy from the 3rd pint of beer he was chugging,so he just laughter and said "haha,you guys are so adorable!".

Albeit,a strange request,you decided to do as your uncle asked anyway,and you went to him and plopped on his lap. No matter his lanky figure,he was still strong enough to carry your weight. So he had no problem in adjusting himself to have you sir on his lap while still getting a comfortable view of the ongoing game.

everybody was focusing on the game,but you,your focus was on something else entirely,all the while you were sitting on his lap, you could feel Jimmy's hot breath on your shoulder,how his left hand was rested at your side,firmly placing a grip, you could feel his heart beating, and you don't know what got over you,but you decided to do something risky, somthing vulgar which you hadn't even properly processed in your mind.

You grinded against him just a little,and that was enough to get his heart beating 10 times faster,you could practically feel his breath hitch,and him letting out the quietest groan. And you felt something hard between you legs,you realised that you had just gotten him rock hard. you felt accomplished for some reason. But that's when your dad decided to drop off the bomb.

"wait,fuck we're out of beer,jimmy look after y/n while I make a quick trip to the store to get few more".

"you got it boss".

You knew that it was wraps the moment your dad walked out the front door and closed it behind him. You blinked and suddenly you were pinned down onto the sofa, your uncle had both your hands pressed firmly above your head,he stared at you like a wild animal on the prowl, hunting its prey.

"damn,I didn't know that you were so dirty, grinding against me like that,you know how 'fuckin hard it was for me to keep from moaning?,you deserve to get punished for it don't you think?".

• you intently stared him,not knowing what to do,excited yet scared of what he was going to do next.

And then without a warning,he smashed his lips against yours,into a rough, messy, hungry kiss. he tasted like liquor with a hint of cigarettes,the cheap brand which he smokes all the time. His tongue was wildly exploring every inch of your mouth, he felt like an animal in heat.

then in between the kiss he said, "you don't know how long I've been wanting to do this,kid".

you already knew that this was going to be quick as your dad would be back from the store in no time,but you also knew,that this was the beginning of something,very long, something very vulgar. and even though it might be wrong,you felt eager,you felt excited. you were looking forward to whatever was going to happen next.

#never underestimate my freak guys #mouthwashing #mouthwashing wrong organ #jimmy mouthwashing #mouthwashing jimmy #mouthwashing x reader #jimmy x reader #dark content #mouthwashing jimmy x reader #mouthwashing smut #jimmy x reader smut #jimmy

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huggywuggysuppy · 5 days ago

Note

once you finish Empires S1 i'd like to hear your thoughts about esmp1!gem. she's genuinely one of my favorite characters to analyse because she is so nuanced and interesting in so many ways anywhere you look at her. her twisted determination to achieve peace at ANY cost, her rigid thinking and neurodivergency, her relation with symbols like her tower or the end and the moon, or her genuine wish to be a good person and so many other things. there's so much that is impossible to grasp at first (<- <- me, lesbian who is really normal about her favorite gem)

She's right.

Essentially, Gem understands the role a wizard PLAYS in a story. She's never the cause of something, but she sure amplifies both the problems and the solutions. She's morally gray, she's playing both sides, but nobody ever challenges her on that because of course Gem's helping the heroes too -- they need artifacts! She's a plot device, a questgiver, a weapon. She's the voice of reason, the straight man in any comedy duo, yet makes the same questionable decisions as anyone. She's experimenting, she's out of her comfort zone, she's having the time of her life. Wizard Gem is, ultimately, a real wizard.

That's the short answer anyhow. Longer analysis, well, I'm so glad you asked. I can't talk about character without diving into the content creator metanarrative (feature not a bug) so let's get into the noodles! What about Wizard Gem makes her so fantastic?

Wizard Gem is a catalyst.

From the beginning, Gem is mixing up dynamics and forcing new inspiration by opposing what's static. The way the rest of the Wither Rose Alliance sort of? Molds? Around her. How Sausage and fWhip are beefing until the day she alliances with Pearl and suddenly the four are besties. How she adds moral nuance to the villain side, both by mixing relations with the hero side, and just by insisting the Wither Rose are seeking peace, really, they're trying their best! This stops things from being so cut and dry and basic. Instead of Xornoth's vain forces against the heroic bumbling fish people (with the plant and animal empires in between), there's all sorts of messiness and drama. And Gem's aware of this, of how she's changing things, and so the effect is amplified.

On a CC level, even her origins are experimental. Gem was originally planning a more naturey plant wizard, but since Shubble, Katherine, AND Pearl, were plant based (& arguably Joey too) she adapted into amethyst and rocks. And it turned out amazing! That foundation of experimenting made it easier to take larger risks both content and character wise. All the empires folk enjoyed the lore centric storytelling: only getting deeper into it through the season, but Gem especially paved the way for embracing rp and outfits and items and fun.

But back to C! As the Wither Rose alliance progresses, terrorizing the server included, Gem maintains her peace loving stance. Taking on the role as fWhip's (and later Sausage)'s PR managers is genuinely so important to me. She never really stops them from doing bad things, but she's always discouraging them and talking them down one or two degrees. Ultimately loyal to her alliance, she's also taking responsibility for the consequences. Helping out Jimmy behind the scenes to lessen the blow, both for him but also herself.

At her core, Wizard Gem wants peace.

For herself and friends at least. Unfortunately, the Crystal Cliffs aren't in a bubble, so she keeps having to save the world anyway. She dreads conflict at best and fears it at worst. Her concerns are her kingdom, her neighbors, whatever magic / building she's invested in right now, and maybe a light shenanigan here or there. She'll help fWhip get out of trouble because they really do love each other, he's always helping her out too in his own ways (ex: making her stuff,) and she'll protect the realm so the problems stay far away from their doorsteps. When things do eventually fall into her lap, she definitely deals with them. Just... not 100%. Enough that they stop breaking the peace for now.

Let's be honest, Wizard Gem is firmly in denial. She's down for burying the corruption and letting it claim whole towers of her base. Often she'll just accept whatever another player brings to her: buying Scott and Katherines plush, whatever weird scams Lizzie tries on her, etc. When Scott gives her the Elsa curse, she hangs out in the nether, takes Shrub’s dodgy Xornoth cure, and stubbornly "it's fine"-s her way through avoiding a real solution until fWhip drags her to Katherine. It's telling that her (short-lived) corrupted evil version is more confident, while others become hyper or angry. This isn't laziness: it's fear. She doesn't want to step on any toes and start any conflicts. You can see it in how she talks to Jimmy and fWhip: giving them what they need not to win, but to end things.

This is how Gem maintains the story role of a wizard: she's always trying to stop things, so she's never starting new things, only making them better or worse. But how does Gem get away with it? She's simultaneously one of the most invested players in the lore, yet playing a character who'd rather be anywhere else. That dichotomy is entertaining, sure, but there's something else here.

Wizard Gem is loyal, curious, and moral. Just... not obviously.

Gem is unfathomably loyal. While she plays both sides, she's always standing alongside her allies in battle and all her actions are ensuring they're safe. She may be exasperated, yet treats her immediate alliance members with kindness. How fWhip drags her into things, but he never asks her to, it's always Gem CHOOSING to follow him because what else is she gonna do? Let him do it himself? How Sausage makes her laugh with his absurdity, even when they're fighting. How she's always a little uncomfortable, even in her great empire, except in the quiet simple moments with her allies between schemes.

(Still can’t believe roseblings isn’t canon. Like fWhip’s line about how he blew up relations with Scott because he messed with Gem, "it's okay fWhip I'm fine now," their tones, ohhhh devious work. They don't need to be canon, nonfamilial platonic relationships and all that, but STILL. I'm only human.)

Gem's also invested in magic and learning more about it, and she learns to trust and share that with others. The Crystal Cliffs Academy demonstrates growth: from solving problems herself when they’re too big to ignore, to actually addressing things at the source. Explicitly, the goal is to strengthen other empires magic knowledge so less crises happen. That’s preventative instead of reactionary. Even choosing the Ocean Queen as her first student is intentional: not an ally, causes a lot of medium scale ruckuses, in text Gem sensed her using transformation magic that wasn’t hers and wanted to guide Lizzie towards at least controlling it. Start of season Gem would’ve just kept handling any crises herself.

Essentially, Gem is trying SO HARD to be good. As anon said, she has a sort of rigid thinking (again, fun contrast between CC experimental and C rigidity) that creates this fantastic mix where she's staying true to the Wither Rose because she loves them and wants to keep them safe as their friend, but also trying to act for the greater good as a wizard, even though she'd rather focus on her own things. It's not a stable point of view, and is constantly challenged, creating the amazing series of events that we get to see unfold.

Also, Wizard Gem is straight up cool.

Regarding imagery, Wizard Gem has a distinct style that’s so fun to build and draw and write about. She's magical and otherworldly (dragons, the end) but also ethereal and magnificent on a human scale (towers, the moon.) Amethyst itself is inherently unique: something about forming deep under pressure, growing slow and beautiful, sought after as thrones and paths alike. These aesthetics have infinite storytelling potential, and look cute doing it.

And all these things are carried into Gem’s imagery as a whole! Losing her eye to and getting corrupted by the end portal in Life Series, building dragons and towers and villages all across her mc worlds, often using the moon in builds like her hc10 lighthouse. She’s solidly the moon in shinyduo sun/moon dynamic (while they both employ sun/moon all the time, Pearl builds and lores solidly more sun, let alone their comedy dynamic.) Even the struggle between embracing/chasing excellence versus holding herself back out of fear: that's Gem in every world! Emp1 is combining a lot of Gem's themes into one single character. And turns out she's really awesome!

This character wholeness lets Gem maintain her signature exasperated excellence over the other players. Like PVP prowess and building skill, she's an expert here too, and delightful to watch and interact with. Wizard Gem is amplifying everything, trying to keep her loved ones safe, learning that she needs to make peace herself, all while staying true to her beautiful masterful self.

Finally, CC!Gem is delighted to roleplay like this.

Every time she turns to the camera to give disclaimers and talk about her character, there's an infectious joy and "I can't believe this is my job." She often compares it to D&D, which ohh the parasocial brainrot is taking so normally, but also there's an unapologeticness to it. If you don't like her character / the roleplay / etc, stop watching, whatever, this is fun for the rest of us. Her and other CCs have talked about the crippling pushback from playing antagonistic characters -- and there's no shortage of that in emp1, she has to put disclaimers on the RP portions! But unlike Life Series where she's constantly fighting demons (it's own post, really) Wizard Gem is having too much fun to care. I think that's why emp1 hits different, at least for us Gem girlies. She's taking this seriously, and she's having the time of her life.

I originally posted about Worldhopper/Watcher Gem because that adds an extra layer of spice to her in all series, but it's still really awesome by itself. Summoning the dragons from ANOTHER WORLD? Hello?? Don't think I missed her using the nether portal to change skins either. Giggling during convos with Xornoth, undaunted by the Empires Crown, the list goes on. One day someone will assemble all her characters into the same room to compare notes and that someone will either be me or Geminitay herself.

In short, Empires S1 Gem is a Wizard. She's a catalyst, she ultimately wants peace, she's loyal curious and moral, she's straight up cool, and she's having fun. And isn't that just the most magical joy of all?

Anyway, accepting empires fic recommendations in reblogs / directly into my inbox. What a privilege to get to watch so much great art. Thank you for reading!

#geminitay #analysis #empires s1 #wizard gem appreciation post #let gem rp whatever she wants petition starting here #let her be morally ambiguous and experiment and wrong sometimes and brilliant other times and let her be happy #trafficblr #ask #no wonder they keep referencing emp1. it's still peak #also watched pearl. lizzie. joel. and some scott. so worth it #it's insane how much emp1 is like. the prototype for the next few years of content.#so many bits may not have begun here but they sure were refined #investing in a purple wizard hat and green cloak after this. mcyt does strange things to the mind #empires smp

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konpeitonom · 1 month ago

Text

first time with college grant curly.

nsfw — lowercase intended ^_^

fem reader—

requests are open and heavily encouraged, i write for every mw character ^.^

notes; college curly back in my head again.. sorry if this is short. i did like half a few days ago and just needed to finish it up now. i accidentally deleted the ask to this i am so so sorry anon out there..

nsfw under the cut! minors do not read

— he would wait for you to suggest it. he doesn’t want you to feel pressured to do so. maybe he’d bring the topic up as a way for you to sort of.. tell him how you feel on it? your comfort comes first.

— when the time comes though, he’s all romantic about it. he wants to give a good impression, wants you to want it as much as he does. maybe you guys are out on a little weekend trip, or jimmy decides to go for a few days. whatever it is, he wants you two to be alone.

— he’d tease you just a little on the undergarments you decide to wear.. like, “oh, picked this all out for me, yeah? that’s cute.” .. would laugh as you push his face away in embarrassment. he just can’t help but wanna poke fun at you, just a little! i’d ease any tension, for sure.

— would kiss you in just the right areas.. would ask over and over if you want this- if it’s too much, too little. it might seem overbearing but you’ll just have to push through it.

— he’d eat you out before fucking you. i think. it’s just really intimate for him. please grab at his hair, shove him further, push your thighs together, it encourages him.

— his foreplay is really good, exceptionally so. he likes the sight of you all soaked before he even puts his dick in, really, it gets him so hard.

— he’ll ask constantly if this is what you want, if he’s going too fast and such. he tries to be gentle but to be honest with himself, he’s a bit pent up.. he’s the kind of guy that once he starts even talking to a girl he likes, he’ll avoid stuff like hookups and one night stands..

— whispers sweet nothings, obviously. tells you how pretty you look, especially like that. that you’re doing so well, that he’s lucky to be able to do this with you.

— errrr read my nsfw alphabet, i think his dick is on the larger end. he’s aware of this and will let you decide if it’s something you can take well or not. he’ll be very gentle, promise!

— he’d stop being so lovey after the first round. i mean, he’s not going to be mean but he has been waiting for this. waiting to take you as his. and he hopes you’d be okay with that.

— “fuck, you can take it like this, right?” he’d ask.. as he’s literally splitting you open.

— he’d jerk off infront of you if you couldn’t take anymore.. his sex drive would probably be on the much higher end at this age. there’s something so erotic about it. he’d like to watch you play with yourself too!

— afterwards he’d make sure to reassure you that there’s no pressure to add sex as a regular thing in your relationship.. that he’s okay with it being a once in a while thing, despite how he acted.

— great aftercare! prepares a nice bath for you both. makes sure to have a conversation again with where you both stand. he doesn’t wanna mess things up.

#nomnompyon #mouthwashing #mouthwashing fic #mouthwashing x reader #captain curly x reader #curly grant x reader #curly x reader #curly headcanons #grant curly x reader #captain curly

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cherrifire · 10 months ago

Note

Hi :D Logic behind the latest batch of cutie marks? if you feel like sharing :)

Hello everypony ^-^ It is cuie mark info dump again ^-^

Before we start, reminder that Grian + Tango do not have cutie marks because they are a hippogriff and a Kirin respectively. Non-pony creatures do not have cutie marks :)

Now that we've got that out of the way, let's get started!

Mumbo's Cutie Mark

I'm the proudest of this one because it'd simple but affective.

Mumbo's cutie mark is a tangled-up red wire which has been cut at the ends to expose the conductors. The wire is also particularly made to create an 'M' shape.

Similar to Impulse's cutie mark, Mumbo's is related to electricity for his investment in redstone. Electricity being the closest thing to it. That said, I gave Mumbo a wire because it is the baseline of all electricity. It connects everything together. From the power source and into whatever little machine or contraption you've built, wires are needed to keep it all powered! So I thought using it as a cutie mark would work really well for Mumbo. Sometimes he can just bring people together just like a wire does for electricity.

(And the little knot in the wire is just a little something to indicate Mumbo may be a bit of a mess)

Additionally, with the wire being in the shape of an 'M' it could stand for Mumbo while also being in the shape of a mustache too :)

Scar's Cutie Mark

Capitalism baby! Scar's cutie mark is of a red top hat next to a bag of bits (the currency in my little pony is called bits and are essentially gold coins).

At heart, Scar is a swindler. He's full of joy and whimsy sure, but he has a real talent for selling little trinkets to anypony who takes a look at his store front. In my head, Scar is essentially the flim and flam of this AU. He's a wandering salespony who shows up from time to time with things to sell from all across Equestria! That's where the little bag can be interpreted as a bag of coins, or a bag full of mystery items he's collected over the years.

Also, the top hat is there to represent Scar's salespony flair.

Joel's Cutie Mark

Joel's cutie mark is of a greek stone pillar and a chisel.

There are a couple of meanings to this one. The first one is pretty obvious, Joel loves to build! He's a fantastic builder with an eye for design. So I chose a greek pillar to represent one of my favourite builds of his, Stratos! But of course, a simple pillar can be used for lots of things and that's where the second meaning comes in. To hold things up! Joel holds himself up to on pretty high pedestal. He's very full of himself and I honestly can't blame him. Joel is great! So of course I had to represent his ego in his cutie mark somehow.

Jimmy's Cutie Mark

Jimmy's cutie mark is of a little canary bird. Another cutie mark with two meanings behind it!

First, is the obvious one. The canary in the coal mine. Misfortune will fall upon the canary to indicate to others that the journey may be too dangerous to continue. A bad luck charm if you will or a bad omen. And that's the surface meaning of his cutie mark that everypony knows it for. Jimmy is the poor clumsy pony in town who always seems to hurt himself before things go wrong.

However, there is a second meaning. Canary birds are also supposed to happiness and harmony. This is the main core of the cutie mark which gets over looked. Despite the bad implications of his cutie mark, it does not stop Jimmy from spreading joy wherever he goes. He's kind and joyous, keeping a positive attitude no matter what.

(I of course have a Ranchers plot point where Tango says this to Jimmy to cheer him up about his cutie mark one day. Tango, who has never had a cutie mark and does not understand their importance, says he doesn't see Jimmy as bad luck, but instead feels joy when Jimmy smiles no matter the situation. But that's a story for another day 🤭)

#cherri.speaks #trafficblr #Third Life x MLP #mumbo jumbo #gtwscar #smallishbeans #solidaritygaming #mclp

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inkedbydesire · 2 months ago

Text

Extortion Part 2 (18+)

Jimmy Uso x Black Fem Reader

(Part 1)

Warning: 18+ Content, detailed storyline with just a little SMUT, MINORS DO NOT ENTER

Summary: Some extremely intimate photos of you and your boyfriend Jonathan Fatu (Jimmy Uso) have fallen into the wrong hands. Now you two must deal with the aftermath of finding out you’re being extorted.

Word Count: 3.9k

A/N: It took way too long to write this. But I’m thankful you guys seemed to like the first part of this story so I decided to continue it. I apologize in advance for any grammatical errors or typos.

Tagging: @msbigredmachine @trentybenty

*************************************************

"Bitch, why would you be butt-ass naked fucking on a balcony anyway?"

You watched your best friend through the screen of your iPhone as her caramel features contorted in pure confusion. As always, Chanel didn't hold back. You could always count on her to ask the most outwardly obnoxious questions. And normally her bluntness would make you laugh, cutting through any tension in your life. But not today. Not with everything you were currently dealing with. Today all Chanel's lack of a filter did was pile onto the rapidly growing weight on your chest.

It had been two days since you'd been back home from Costa Rica, and you were still trying to wrap your head around the mess you and Jonathan had found yourselves in. You could barely eat or sleep. And for the last 48 hours, you had been doing everything in your power to distract yourself from the magnitude of the situation. Stupidly, you were hoping to somehow wake up to it all being an extremely vivid dream. But no, each day you still awoke to that email taunting you.

You had no choice but to face reality.

Someone had pictures of you and Jonathan having sex out on that balcony in Costa Rica. That person threatened to spread those pictures if Jonathan didn't cough up 50,000 dollars in the next few days. The email said that he had a week starting after the day that the email was delivered. That was two days ago. Which meant you only had five days left before everything came crashing down.

You couldn't stop obsessing over the only two options you had. And neither one of them offered much comfort.

Option one: Pay the money.

Get it over with by doing what the creep was demanding. It sounded like the quickest way to get whoever it was to leave you and Jonathan alone. But still... who's to say that the person wouldn't come back for more, figuring that if Jonathan did it once, he would be liable to do it again? After all, the person would still have those pictures. And even worse, they could easily get Jonathan's money and still sell the photos to someone else.

Option two: Go to the cops.

Extortion was illegal. Maybe the authorities could track down the person before anything got leaked. But there was zero security in that. Even if the cops could find the person before the deadline, who's to say they hadn't already sent the photos to a few of their friends just in case?

No matter how you looked at it, you still felt like this was something that would haunt you for the rest of your life. And it left you feeling completely helpless.

Calling Chanel wasn't about seeking advice. This situation was unique to you and Jonathan, so you knew she could offer none. This call was more about needing a lifeline. You had to get ahead of this somehow. And you knew that there would be no pressure in telling Chanel. She was already privy to tons of your deepest secrets since you two became best friends in middle school. She knew you better than anyone on earth.

There was one person you were dreading having to relay the information to though, your mother. Just the thought of that conversation made you physically sick. And you were pretty sure that Jonathan was in the same boat with his parents.

How do you tell the people who raised you something like you were having sex in public and now someone had pictures of it?

It seemed damn near impossible.

However, yesterday Jonathan did tell his twin brother about the predicament. To your astonishment, all Joshua did was laugh at the situation at first, but then Jonathan hit him with a dose of reality. This situation didn't just affect you and him. Joshua could very well be confused for the person in those photos. Sure, he and Jonathan were fraternal twins with different hairstyles and tattoos, but everyone knows that the general public is going to believe what they want.

Who knew how far all of this could spiral?

The blackmailer could take those pictures and twist the story however they wanted. Hell, they could take an extreme step and make it look like you were cheating on Jimmy with Jey if they wanted to. People wouldn't give a damn about the truth. They would only care about the mess.

You had no idea that one reckless moment with the man you loved would spiral into such a living nightmare.

"That's not the point, Chanel," you stated to her as you returned from your stress-filled thoughts.

Her face softened as she studied you. "I know. I was trying to cheer you up, Y/N. You look terrified, girl."

"Thanks for trying," you murmured, then sighed before saying "I am terrified."

"Do you and Jonathan know what y'all are going to do?" A look of genuine concern washed over her facial features.

"Not yet," you admitted with a weak shrug. "But we don't have a choice but to figure something out."

Truthfully though, you and Jonathan hadn't even had a real discussion about the ordeal yet. You fainted when he told you about it in Costa Rica, so you felt like he was giving you the time and space to fully process what was happening. The expression on his face when you came to would forever be burned into your memory. You don't know how long you were out but when you opened your eyes, he was hovering over you, holding a cold towel to your forehead with the most petrified expression on his face. You had never seen him like that before and never wanted to see it again.

"This is a crazy-ass situation, Y/N," Chanel muttered more so to herself as your eyes averted up to the top of your phone screen after you felt a buzzing sensation. You quickly skimmed over the message you just received from Jonathan.

As you typed your okay to his message, you exhaled a breath you hadn't even realized you were holding. Even amidst the chaos, the mere thought of being near him made the burden feel just a little lighter.

Costa Rica was only a memory now as you and Jonathan had to step back into your day-to-day lives. He went back to work, and you, a first-grade teacher, had lesson plans and grading to get through. Your sub had covered for you while you took your little impromptu vacation, but on Monday you had to return to the classroom.

The world didn't stop for this disaster. You and Jonathan still had to find a way through it. No matter how this played out, the earth would keep spinning.

You conversed with Chanel for a few more minutes over FaceTime before you tore yourself away from the welcomed distraction and halfheartedly focused on your lesson plan. About 15 minutes into that, you heard Jonathan entering your apartment with the key you gave him a month ago.

"What's up, baby?" You heard his cheerful voice as he turned the corner and entered the living room. He dropped his training bag on the floor before walking over to where you were sitting on the couch. You pushed your MacBook aside and stood up to greet him with a hug.

"Get anything done today?" He asked you as he lifted you without effort while you wrapped your legs securely around his waist and placed your arms around his neck.

"Not much." You admitted to him. Anytime you tried to solely focus on your lesson plan, your mind wandered to that email and the mass destruction that was soon awaiting you. And that seemed to be the only thing to occupy your mind.

"I understand. It's a lot going on," he stated knowingly before pecking you on the lips.

"I'm about to hop in the shower right quick, though. Come get in with me." He added.

"I already got in," you told him.

"I didn't ask you that. I said come get in with me." He responded with a smile as he kept you in his arms and started walking towards the stairs that led up to your bedroom. He didn't place you back onto your feet until he reached the bathroom connected to your room. Something you already knew he would do because this was nearly a weekly occurrence for you two. You would always shower before Jonathan came over, and he would always want you to get right back in with him. Some nights you stood your ground, and others you gave in.

Tonight felt like one of those caving-in nights.

"Okay, but I don't want to hear no complaining about the temperature." You warned him as you moved over and pulled your shower door open. You turned on the water, adjusting it to your liking. A liking that Jonathan always seemed to have a problem with. You could already hear his nagging, "It's too hot." But on second thought, you found yourself adjusting the temperature so that you wouldn't have to hear his whining. Something you always did in the end anyway.

"I don't even be complaining," Jonathan muttered under his breath in a childish tone, making you smile and shake your head as you turned your attention to your mirror.

You watched his reflection as he took his hair down from the low ponytail he had it in and tossed the hair wrapper on the counter. You took the same wrapper and used it to put your braids up into a bun before walking back over to where he was removing his clothes. You followed in line, removing yours before stepping into the shower with him.

Your body instantly relaxed underneath the soothing water as you and Jonathan eased into familiar positions with his hands resting on your hips as you adjusted yourself in front of him. Lucky for you both, your shower was wide enough for you to stand beside each other rather than someone being forced to be in the back. You never had to deal with the predicament of someone hogging the water, and you were very thankful for that. One less thing you had to hear Jonathan jokingly whine about.

The sound of the water softly cascading off your bodies and hitting the shower floor could be the only thing heard for a few minutes as you and Jonathan appreciated each other's physical presence. He ran his hands from your hips to your thighs, then back up again while you traced his tattoos with your fingertips. He then planted a light kiss on your forehead, and for that moment while you were lost in each other, it almost felt like everything was okay.

Almost.

"Alright... how do you feel about everything?" Jonathan asked, abruptly shifting you back to reality. You looked up, connecting your eyes with his, knowing that "everything" meant that he finally wanted you to express how you felt about that email and what could potentially come of it.

You didn't know how the hell you two would manage to pull it off but no matter what you had to figure it out. Step one: have an actual conversation about it.

"I've... I've been," you begin to say, searching your brain for the right words.

"I've been managing it," you finalized as you reached behind Jonathan and grabbed your French vanilla-scented soap bar and loofah, before proceeding into your showering routine for the second time tonight.

Every few seconds you were internally uncontrollably freaking out about the situation but still, you wanted to appear brave in front of Jonathan. You already did something as extreme as fainting over it so you didn't want to do anything further to add to the stress he was most likely already under.

"Well, you know you don't have to manage the shit on your own......that's what I'm here for," he told you as he turned around and grabbed his showering items that were neatly kept beside yours. It was sort of unspoken but Jonathan had low-key moved into your apartment over the months. 75 percent of his clothing and personal items were sorted among your things. It happened so seamlessly that somehow it seemed like it had been that way all along.

"Be real with me Y/N." he urged you as he returned his gaze to yours watching you intently. It was clear that he wasn't buying your "I've been managing it" bullshit. He had learned your body language so well that he always knew when you were holding something back from him. You didn't know why you still tried to put up a front for him. He saw right through it every single time.

"Okay ........" you began to backtrack on your previous statement.

"Truthfully, I'm scared Jon," you revealed to him as you dropped your eyes from his and focused more on washing your body to distract yourself from how intense the conversation was about to get.

"I'm scared that if those pictures are exposed, I won't be able to face my family and friends or your family and friends anymore." You continued, and the more you talked the more you realized that wanting to put on a brave face for him was pointless. He had to be your rock through this as you had to be his. This was something you were going through together.

"And I know you're not supposed to care, but I'm scared about how the internet will perceive me and most importantly..." You paused as your next train of thought caused your heart to sink.

"I'm scared of losing my job," you concluded.

Since you were a little girl, you've always known that you wanted to be a teacher. So after you graduated high school you worked hard to make your dream come true. There were zero bumps in the road during your 4-year teaching career up until this point.

This whole ordeal was nerve-wracking because your being in a relationship with Jimmy Uso was public knowledge that even most of your students knew now. A lot of them tuned in to wrestling with their parents or on their own so the fact that Ms. (Your/Lastname) was dating a wrestler was exciting news to them. The amount of Jimmy and Jey Uso action figures you found yourself having to confiscate because your students thought it was funny to bring them out during the middle of your lessons was comical. But despite that, you still found their admiration for Jonathan and his craft heartwarming and even planned to surprise them with him on Career Day in the future.

But right now that same future was looking dreadful.

Your stomach turned at the thought of what your students and their parents would see if those photos were to get leaked. You had no idea how the school board would react. Would they understand that this was something that was completely out of your control? Or would they blame you for being reckless?

Could this be the end of your teaching career? You couldn't see any other school hiring you if those photos were exposed.

"What about you? How do you feel, Jon?" You suddenly asked him needing to deflect from your own feelings for a moment. You already knew how real this whole thing was but talking about your fears out loud was suddenly making it hard to breathe and the steam from the shower wasn't making it any better.

"I thought about it and I feel like I'ma be able to handle whatever happens," he told you with a surprising shrug as he moved his soapy washcloth from his neck to his chest.

This was your first time paying close attention to it but Jonathan didn't seem to have the same worry on his face that you had been sporting for the last 2 days. Besides looking terrified when you fainted afterward he quickly transformed back into his carefree goofy self. All this time you were assuming that you two had to be experiencing the same emotions because who wouldn't be freaking out behind this?

But you should've known that not even this could rattle Jonathan Fatu.

Since being with him you learned that no matter what life threw at him he always seemed to maintain a Hakuna Matata ass mindset. He always saw the glass as half full instead of half empty in any situation. He eased through life reminding himself to take things one day at a time. And that shit worked for him. But you on the other hand were a raging worrier. You worked yourself up and stressed over the smallest things. You two being so different in that aspect was probably why your relationship worked so well.

Jonathan grounded you.

"I'm just worried about you baby. I don't care how I'm going to be viewed or how people are going to react if those pictures get out. But I know this will affect you in a different way than it will affect me so how you're handling everything is my main priority."

As you thought about it you realized that he was right.

The backlash of the photos would hit you two differently. For one, Jonathan was a part of one of the most important storylines that the WWE had to often and he put so many years into the company. They wouldn't fire him over this especially with it not being his fault. Yeah, it would look bad for a little while but people would move on.

But even though you had given 4 years of your life to teaching, you could still see the school board turning their backs on you.

And as sad as it sounds at the end of the day Jonathan was a man. No one would judge him as harshly as you would be judged for what those photos consisted of. In fact, Jonathan would probably get a few brownie points while you would be slut shamed for simply engaging in a natural act with your boyfriend.

That was the world you lived in.

So you could see why Jonathan didn't carry the same stress as you.

"We were just having a conversation about you not being able to handle my lifestyle a couple of days ago and then some shit like this happens. I bet you really thinking about not wanting to be with me now. That's the only thing I'm worried about." he admitted.

You looked up at him confusedly for a few seconds.

"Wait ...... that's what you're worried about?" you asked him. "Me not wanting to be with you over this?"

As he nodded yes at you solemnly your heart fluttered at the notion that you walking out of his life was his main concern. Not the pornographic images of you and him that could potentially be plastered all over the internet in a few days.

He was worried about you breaking up with him. It sounded crazy but you loved him more because of it.

"Jon....listen," you told him as you ran your wet hands up his chest before placing them on either side of his neck.

"That's the last thing on my mind," you told him attempting to put his mind to rest.

"Yes, I'm scared as fuck about what will happen but I'd be even more terrified if I didn't have you to lean on. I love you."

"I love you too." He responded before leaning down to place another kiss on your forehead.

"We just have to figure it out," you said to him.

"I'm already on it." he told you "We got a meeting with my lawyer tomorrow morning. I'm not giving up no money just to have those pictures used against us anyway so we gone take it to the law and deal with whatever comes next."

You had no idea that Jonathan was already on top of things. His taking the initiative to do so did give you just a little more hope in the outcome.

"But no matter what we gone be alright ......... alright?" He asked you.

"Alright," you responded.

"Just stop stressing yourself out about it. I don't like how you been walking around here looking. And I don't want you to scare the fuck out of me again like you did when you fainted."

You could see in his eyes how much that still bothered him. You realized then that you needed to find a way to somehow take on his mindset. You had to stop worrying so much about it because, at the end of the day, it wouldn't help anything.

"I'm trying. I literally just can't stop thinking about it ..... like not even for a second. But I'll try Jon. I swear." you told him truthfully with a weak smile telling yourself that you would fight hard to have a better spirit about the situation.

"If you need some help not thinking about it I promise that I could take your mind off of it for a while." He stated to you.

"How?" you asked him and instantly regretted it when you saw the goofy ass grin he gave you in response as he placed his hands on your hips again.

"Jon no ..... no," you told him as you pushed his chest a little.

"That's the whole reason we're dealing with this right now." you shook your head at him and genuinely laughed for the first time in 2 days baffled that sex would even be on his mind right now. But you really weren't that surprised. Not much could throw a wrench in Jonathan's sex drive. There was no difference between him and the energizer bunny.

"Come on.... we can't let some weirdo with a camera stop us from doing what we do." He spoke to you softly before leaning down and planting a few kisses on your neck knowing that was a sure way to get you stirred up.

And it did.

"You looked good as fuck in them pictures though." He said when he returned his eyes to yours.

"I don't care. Something like that is supposed to be for your eyes only," you responded to him with a hit of playfulness causing him to smile.

Engaging in the very act that had a whole world of trouble waiting for you seemed ironic. But you had been worrying yourself crazy for 48-plus hours about the possible outcomes of that email. Maybe you deserved to let go for a moment.

You were still hesitant but all of that went out the window when Jonathan's lips touched yours. As you gladly welcomed his tongue into your mouth you felt him pulling you with him as he moved back and sat down on your shower seat. He then broke the kiss by reaching down grabbing hold of your right leg and pulling it up to place it over his shoulder.

"You're going to drop me" you squealed as you gripped onto him for support as he softly kissed your other set of lips.

"Have I ever dropped you before?" He asked as he paused to look up at you.

"No." You responded.

"Okay then. I'm not going to start today," he told you then moved his focus back to between your legs. He held onto you tightly as you tried your best to balance on one leg underneath the water as you felt his tongue on your clit. He moved it slowly up and down over your button causing you to moan out into the air.

"Oooh s-shit Jon" you breathe out as he started to gently suck on your clit. As you focused squarely on that feeling that email traveled to the far back of your mind.

You would just have to deal with that shit tomorrow.

*************************************************

#jimmy uso #jimmy uso x black reader #jimmy uso smut #jimmy uso x reader #jimmy uso x you #jimmy uso x oc #the bloodline x reader #jimmy uso fanfiction #wwe imagine #black writers #black women writers #black reader #jonathan fatu

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helplessautomaton · 2 months ago

Text

its you, youre all i see

y!daisuke x reader

wc, 853

writing this as i eat my beef bone broth ramen and listening to Queen

going off my word vomits, somewhat soft? everyone is mentioned

it'd been a week. yet the frustration and tiredness was setting in more heavily now. you tapped along whatever surface was available to you, something that wasnt so interruptive. daisuke wasnt here in the medical room with you, where you actually were needed. you were anya's intern but as of late you felt more like swansea's instead. you genuinely felt so bad for the woman, constantly being whisked off to a department you had little to none experience in. there's only so much of a branch she could offer towards your situation before getting fed up with it.

not to mention curly's frustrations with the situation at hand. god forbid if jimmy ever saw you, the man always managed to show up in the wrong place at the wrong time. getting more and more pissed off with you, to the point he almost put his hands on you. by some horrible place of giving credit where its due, you couldnt find yourself to blame him. before the extent of the situation got to be more, everyone thought your relationship with daisuke was cute. as long as it didnt interrupt work- now it feels thats all you ever did. you didnt want to pity yourself while proceeding not to do anything. obviously not wanting to be seen as a burden who stayed near only one person and couldnt do anything.

daisuke was so attached to your person, his million dollar smile refusing to extinguish when his arms were around your waist. you had your own little ray of sunshine by the hip, but eventually it began to burn. the two of you were getting constantly scolded by someone, even if you tried to explain to daisuke— you really needed to be helping anya right now. yet daisuke managed to make you stay just a bit longer and the cycle would repeat. there were times where you two were properly doing your separated tasks and the overall mood would lighten, apart from swansea complaining about daisuke. anya would relax and smile more towards you, curly looked like he didnt have a headache for most of the day, jimmy- jimmy was himself, couldnt have given less than a shit about him. these were times you didnt mind when daisuke stole you away, after shift when you both were doing your job separately.

yet, daisuke couldnt let you go for long, he'd start whining then run off to find you if swansea didnt force him to stick by his side. besides those moments, when hes with you he still feels the same as he was when you two first met. just always a little closer, letting you play with his hair or anything he was allowed to bring with. those were the times of normalcy where it didnt feel like everyone was on the edge of snapping at you two. both of you laughing at each other's jokes and getting along swimmingly. never failing to catch the stars in daisukes eyes whenever you were just there, in proximity to him. never mattered where you stood or sat, his eyes were wide open. somehow they only got wider when you praised him- even by a little bit. his too good smile radiating over to you as he held your hands in his.

daisuke always noticed your tiredness to some degree. genuinely concerned for you, slowing down to match your mood. he needed to be the one to cheer you up, in his mind no one else could do it as well as he did. you were aware of his inability to hand you over, even to your captain who might have needed you for something. in the back of your head, you understood why, he enjoyed your company like no else and he didnt want it to suddenly be cut off.

he always managed to some extent cheer you up, he made it hard to say no. some part of your brain was happy about that, he was your best friend after all. even if all the tension was caused by his need for you to be by him. his love was vibrant even if you thought he wasnt really in touch with it. he was just all over you and there was truth to say it was overwhelming but some part of you didnt mind. yet you had to stay reasonable and not let it consume you, you had a job to do.

you were quickly pulled away from your thoughts by anya, completely forgetting where you were. she gave you a concerned smile before stating that she had no idea you were in here waiting for her. giving a nervous laugh you apologized for being in your own head and not coming to find her first. just at this point hoping you get to stay doing your intended task and spending time bonding with someone different. hopefully you could find a balance with daisuke so this could all work out in some capacity.

#mouthwashing x reader #yandere daisuke #yandere mouthwashing #yandere #daisuke mouthwashing #mouthwashing #🫀soma's fics

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raya-hunter01 · 6 months ago

Text

What Are We? Pt. 1/2

What Are We?

Jey Uso X OC (Kayla)

Sefa

Roman X Jade

Jimmy X Trin

Rhea Ripley

Rating: 18+ Warning: Smut; sex, fluff, couple arguing, making up

Jey and Kayla have been friends and lovers for years. What happens when Kayla is tired of Jey asking for space instead of putting a label on what their relationship is. The script is flipped when Kayla is the one who asks for space and cuts off contact with Jey for six months, even moving out of the state.

What happens when Rhea, Bianca, and Trin invite Kayla to celebrate her birthday in Pensacola and Jey finds out? Can he finally admit he loves her or are they better off apart? This was requested by @royalkay23 thank you for being so patient and I hope you like it thus far.

Savannah, GA

“I ain’t comin’ Jey is going to be breathin’ down my neck.”

“And your ass know you gon’ fold like that chair I hit Becky with the other night,” Bianca said chuckling.

“Kayla, I need you to trust us, we have the whole weekend planned and you need this,” Jade pleaded as I sighed looking into the camera.

This was our weekly thing to do to talk on facetime once a week.

“Ya’ll I don’t know, I been trying to stay under the grid since I left Pensacola.”

“I promise we went Lowkey for your birthday this time. We got a little staycation with some activities planned and a little party. You don’t even have to go to the house show on Saturday if you don’t want too” Trin said pouting trying to make me feel guilty.

“I don’t want to see him ya’ll,” I whispered as I heard Jade fake cough muttering “bullshit” as I rolled my eyes.

Damn, she could always read me like a book.

“Jey is leaving for Atlanta; he won’t be here I promise. It’s a mini girl’s weekend celebrating your birthday,” Bianca swore as I chuckled.

It was nice they were trying to plan something nice for me, but I knew Jey. If he knew I was coming, he would be there with bells on trying to talk and I ain’t in the mood. He made his choice, and I made mine.

“Girl come on and turn up for your birthday,” Trin said making me laugh.

“Yes, let us celebrate you Kayla, let’s have some fun.” Rhea begged as I finally agreed. “Fine, I will be there but why do I have the feeling ya’ll setting me up.”

Six months earlier

Pensacola, FL

Jey's House

“So why would she show up here?” I asked as Jey wiped the sweat from his brow. “You really wanna talk about it now after we’ve just had sex.”

“Didn’t the bitch just knock on the door, trying to get in here!”

“I sent her ass away, I ain’t tryin’ to argue baby we’ve had a nice weekend together. Damn, sometimes I just wish I was single,” he said as I looked at him getting a familiar feeling.

But not this time, I was gonna get his ass first.

“Well let me help you out, I’m leaving, and you can be single and up in every piece of ass you see fit to be in.” I said pulling away from him.

“Kayla, I didn’t mean-”

“I can’t believe I feel for it again,” I hissed getting up putting my shirt back on. “Come on Kayla don’t go,” Jey pleaded as I searched for my skirt. “No, I need to go because once again you want to play games, Jey,” I said as he got out of bed trying to stop me from leaving.

“I didn’t tell her to come by, Kayla,” Jey said as I scurried around the room gathering clothing in my hands. His ex had just come by and had given this song and dance about wanting him back. Now I never met her, but I’m pissed because she’s the reason he can’t commit.

She also worked for the WWE as well which made it worse that he saw her a lot at work.

“Kayla, please can we just talk about this,” Jey pleaded as I shook my head putting on my shoes.

“Why? I know the drill; she is fucking with your head and now you’re not sure what we are all of a sudden and now you want space.”

“I don’t want to make it complicated Kayla, I been through some fucked up shit.”

“We’ve been sleeping together for years Jey; we are past complicated now. Every time we get close to putting a name on it you freak out or something happens that makes you question us.”

“So, you just gon’ leave now. Kay, I don’t want you to go,” Jey pleaded as I pushed him away.

“I ain’t getting back in bed with a man who doesn’t see himself being in a relationship with me.” I was tired and just wanted to go home. This was the last time I was falling for this bullshit.

“Kayla, I need you to understand-”

“Oh I understand, you like me but not enough to be in a relationship with me?"

“I never said that bae.”

“Your actions show me that you want me to share my body with you, do couple things such as have sex, go on dates, be there for you when you’re going through shit but you don’t want to be in a relationship with me?”

“Ok, that sounds shitty-”

“Because it is shitty Jey, but you ain’t gotta worry about it no more. I want you have a nice life and I hope you find what you’re looking for. Storming out of the bedroom.

“Kay, don’t do this-”

“Do what? Choose myself? Stop being your fuckin’ toy that you pick up off the shelf and play with when you get bored of other bitches?!” I screamed as Jey grabbed me by the arms stopping my rant, making me look at him.

“OK, dat’s it GOTDAMNIT!” The anger radiating off him seeping into me as well. Hell, I was pissed and fed up.

“Let me go, Josh!” I yelled as he invaded my space making me look at him.

“You ain’t no fuckin’ toy, I lo-”

“You what Josh?!......The silence pissing me off even further.

“Speak! Damn it!”

“Look just don’t let me hear you say some shit like that ever again. You ain’t no toy I just play wit and you know it.” Jey said more calmer as I scoffed heading towards the door.

“Don’t come by my house because I won’t be there, and don’t call my mom either. I just need some space Josh.”

The shock and look of disbelief on his face would have made me laugh if it wasn’t so sad. Throwing his words back at him had struck a nerve and knew it.

“Kay, you don’t mean that let’s just talk-”

“Never expected to hear those words from me, did you? Well, Josh I think we need some space from each other.”

And with that I slammed the door not only Jey but whatever we were to each other.

"Damn, we been through so shit." Thinking about that day was the last thing I wanted but the memory always came flooding back at the wrong time.

It took a lot of strength to walk away, but when you tired, you tired.I loved him and I knew he loved me, but I had to choose myself in that moment.

I only wished he had fought for me, and let me knew everything would be ok, but he didn’t and now six long months had passed.

The girls were right, I needed a break. I was going to enjoy my birthday and celebrate.

Maybe I wouldn’t run into Jey after all and if I did, don’t let me fold.

---

One Week Later

Pensacola, FL

Fusion R&B Club

Jey’s POV

“Man, I thought you was restin’ what you doin’ here?” Roman asked as I rolled my eyes. “Ya’ll ain’t slick I know Kayla flew in for her birthday and I just wanna see her.”

“Man let that girl have fun tonight, she just touched down two hours ago and you already trying to start.” Jimmy accused as I tried to find Kayla on the dance floor.

“I ain’t starting shit, she the one that left me six months ago.” I hissed still very angry even though I know I was to blame.

“She had a reason, look just get at her in the morning and let her enjoy the night,” Sefa said as I ignored him taking a seat. “I won’t bother her tonight, I just wanna make sure she good.”

“You are so full of shit, don’t ruin her night, or I will kill you." Roman's tone was stern but I ain’t scared of his ass, I’m here to see Kayla.

Throughout the night I managed to keep a low profile just watching Kayla from afar. It definetly put things even more into prospective.

Men desired her and they weren’t trying to hide it at all. Seeing Tama and his brother watching the girls VIP table more than the dance floor was pissing me off.

“I’m bout to flip all this shit over, if he looks at her one more time,” I hissed seeing Tama and his brother whispering and pointing at Kayla…My Kayla.

“Man, let them women do they thing, it’s cool,” Sefa said as I sat seething.

“That shit, easy for you to say. Your girl ain’t up there buckin’ like a mechanical bull in the VIP section,” I said looking at Kayla with her hands on the table, her ass bouncing from side to side as I subconsciously I gripped my dick…

Man, she just asking for it, and when I give it to her, she betta ride dis dick just like that too.

I swear I ain’t never been so thankful she had on jeans in my life but dat ass was thangin’ and looking extra fat as she shook her hips bouncing on her hands as Trin and Bianca cheered her on.

“Damn, you had it like that, and you fucked it up,” Sefa said as I shot him a look, he was enjoying my misery a little too much. I was about to knock that smile off his damn face.

“I ain’t fucked up shit, Kayla’s still mine. We just fall in and out from time to time.”

“Ain’t you tired of dat, Uce? You know you love her, gone make dat shit official twin.”

"I done told his ass, keep on letting her walk around this bitch single if you want to,” Roman said as I sighed knowing he was right.

“Beautiful and single at that,” Jimmy added, nudging me as I rolled my eyes.

“She ain’t fuckin’ single, we just takin a break trying to figure some shit out.”

“Aye! Buckin’, buckin' like a mechanical bull! You betta buck Kaydoll!” Trin yelled taping Kayla on her phone as I looked back at Jimmy.

“See, that’s what I’m talkin’ bout, yo' wife always instigating shit, probably on Instagram live right damn now broadcasting Kayla’s ass,” I hissed as he laughed.

“Hey, no face, no case.”

“Man fuck you.”

“But let’s be real twin, you always doin’ stupid shit and being indecisive about your feeling for her. Look it took a lot of convincing to get her out here for her birthday. The girls got a little staycation and party planned for her so stay outta the way,” Jimmy said as I frowned.

A party? Staycation? Really, and ain’t nobody told me shit. They really were gonna let me fly home to Atlanta and not tell me nothing.

“I ain’t being indecisive about shit. Kayla knows what the deal is and how we get down. But the real question, how come ya’ll ain’t told me about all these plans? Ya’ll know I been wanting to see her,” I said as Roman sighed.

“The girls said you weren’t invited, and ain’t you flying back to Atlanta tomorrow,” he said shrugging his shoulders as I saw Tama approaching Kayla in their VIP section with a drink.

“I ain’t going no fuckin’ where..I like to party just like the rest of ya’ll.” I said snarling at the fact this clown was up on my woman.

“Aye, I am so serious right now, you cockblock any of us this weekend with yo bullshit, I’mma beat yo ass,” Sefa said as I saw Tama lean over and try to whisper something to Kayla, but she moved away giving him a polite smile, keeping him at arm’s length.

“I’ll be back,” I said standing up as Jimmy tried to grab my arm but I snatched away from him.

“Man, Uce, chill out they just talkin’” Jimmy said as I ignored him making my way toward the girls VIP section. He ain’t got no fuckin’ reason talkin’ to her, that’s the damn point of the matter. Motherfucka know what time it is.

“Jey, what you are doing here?” Rhea asked blocking my path before I got to their VIP section as I frowned.

“I’m trying to talk to my girl, could you move please so I can go up there.”

“Oh, now she yo’ girl but for years you ain’t wanna put a label on it.” Bianca said rolling her eyes as I sighed. “Bee you know me..You my sister and you know I love her. I just have a hard time voicing that shit.”

“So, what you want us to do?”

“First of all move so I can go up there and break that shit up,” I said pointing at Kayla and Tama as Rhea smirked.

“Not on your life, Kayla can handle herself and she seems to like his company,” Jade said pointing at Kayla laughing at something Tama said.

“Look, you gonna only make it hard for yourself if you come up here acting a fool,” Rhea warned, but all I saw was red seeing him push up on her. The final straw was his leading her out of the VIP to the dance floor.

“I love ya’ll but please move, I need to get my girl.”

“Fine, go ahead and dig a deeper hole we can’t help you get out of,” Bianca said making the girls move.

“Fine I will,” I said stalking towards Kayla and Tama, but Sefa jumped in front of me. “Think about what you about to do.”

“I’m bout to talk to my woman and it ain’t got shit to do wit ya’ll secretive asses.”

“We did what we had to do for Kay and we ain’t sayin’ sorry for that. So, you can scratch your ass and get glad.”

Scanning the dance floor, I didn’t see Kayla nor Tama. I had lost them.

“Where the fuck did they go?! look what you did, ya’ll fuckin’ pissin’ me off now”. I hissed as Sefa rolled his eyes.

Where the fuck did they go? Searching the room, I sighed in relief seeing Kayla go in the restroom and Tama talking to his brother by the exit.

“I know she ain’t planning to leave wit him.”

“Leave it alone, Uce,” Sefa pleaded as I rolled my eyes making my way towards Tama and his brother Tonga.

“Hey, Jey what’s up wit you?” Tama asked as I tried to keep my cool.

“Oh, nothing just coming to talk to Kayla.”

Kayla’s POV

“Yes, relief,” I mumbled washing my hands. I had been having a great time. Tama seemed nice, and consoderate. When I told him I didn’t know where the bathroom was he offered to take me.

“You gon stay away from her is what you gon’ do or I’mma break every bone in your fuckin’ body.”

Hearing the familiar voice and commotion I went towards the door in shock. "I know it isn't?"

“Jey, she’s a big girl and can do what she wants. I bought her a drink and offered to show her where the restroom was, that’s all.”

“Stay away from her, that’s the only warning you getting.”

“I didn’t know she was spoken for Jey, but it’s cool.”

“You a bitch ass lie!”

Opening the door, Jey quickly ushered me back inside locking the door behind him.

“Are you carzy?!” I hissed as Tama pounded on the door.

“Hey, let me in. Are you good in there, Kayla?!” He shouted as Jey rolled his eyes.

“Tell lover boy you good, and to take his ass on somewhere.”

“You can’t tell me what to do,Jey. Why the hell are you even here?”

“Aye, it don’t matter to me, he can stay and listen to me fuck some sense into you for all I care.” Jey said without shame as I scoffed.

“Tama, I’m ok....I’ll call you later,” I said for good measure to piss Jey off knowing good and hell well I didn’t have his number.

“I’ll hopefully see you before the weekend is over Kayla.”

“You won’t be seeing her again, bye.” Jey hissed at the door as I threw my head back in frustration and screamed.

“You just so damn confusing, you don’t want a relationship, but you don’t want men talkin’ to me. Make it make sense, Jey.”

“He wasn’t talkin! He was wanting to get wit you, he been watchin’ you all fuckin' night!”

“Ok AND!! I’m not with you, what do you want from me Jey?! This off and on shit is getting old,” I said as he stopped me from walking past him, pulling me close as I avoided his gaze.

“Kayla, you already know I don’t share what’s mine and stop calling me Jey," he whispered as I growled in frustration, somewhat turned on.

Kayla keep your legs closed, don’t do it.

Jey’s POV

I didn’t want our first conversation to go this way, but Tama had pissed me off. Her dancing like she didn’t have a care pissed me off. Men looking at her pissed me off. My own stupidity of letting her walk out of my house that day pissed me off.

“What did you just say?”

“You heard me Kayla, I don’t share what’s mine and your mine.” I said boldly.

“Oh, so now I’m yours,” Kayla said sarcastically, pissing me off even more. She knows she’s mine and it was time to remind her.

“They sniffin’ round you cause’ they know what the deal is,” I said blocking Kayla from leaving, backed her up against the door.

“Jey, what exactly is the de-” my mouth swallowing her whimpers with a sloppy passionate kiss. Six months of anger, passion, regret and most importantly love taking over us both as our tongues battled for control as if we couldn't get close enough to each other.

Rendering her into a whimpering mess, Kayla quickly pulled away trying to regain a sense of control, but I refused to let up.

I had missed her and had to let her know it wasn’t over between us no matter the time or distance we belonged to each other.

“Yea, you already know what the deal is, and how I get down stop playin’ wit me.” I growled moving my kisses to her neck, knowing her weakness.

“J-Josh I can’t.”

Her moans of pleasure driving me insane, I knew I should stop, but I couldn't.

“Yea, say my name, like you know you mine,” I groaned claiming her lips once again, as she clawed at my shirt pulling me closer. Yea, I’m nippin’ this shit in the bud tonight.

“Left me, knowin’ what you mean to me.” I groaned wrapping her legs around my waist.

“You never showed it and I’m not yours,” Kayla moaned trying to move remain strong, but I wasn’t gon’ give up that easy. Grinding against her pants covered center, she gasped instinctively rolling her hips against mine.

“Fuck,” Kayla gasp as I moaned in agreement, burying my face in her neck. It had been too long, our pleasure short lived as Kayla pushed at my shoulders when a loud knock startled us.

“Let me down, Jey.” she pleaded as I placed her back on her feet but still held her in my arms, ignoring whoever was trying to come in.

“Your mind is mine,” I moaned making her look at me before I kissed her tenderly on the forehead. “Jey, stop,” she pleaded as I moved my attention to her now plump lips. Gently nipping at them before once again tasting them, in a deep kiss startling us both of its power.

“Your lips are mine.” I rasped.

My own heart racing as I kissed alongside her neck. “Yours,” she moaned as a primal growl escaped my lips, her acceptance of our fate turning me on even more.

Grasping her hand within mine and placing it over her heart. “Your heart is mine,” I whispered before placing our conjoined hands over my own heart as Kayla looked at me with confusion.

“And my heart is your, Kayla.”

“What are you sayin’?”

“I’m tired of fighting how I feel Kayla, I want to be with you, and I want you to be my mine.” Another knock at the door disrupting us again before she could respond.

“Open the door Jey, folks out here need to get in the bathroom. They threatenin' to call security,” Jimmy said as Kayla wiped her tears. “Two minutes Twin!" I shouted as Kayla shook her head smoothing down her clothes and her hair.

“No, we’re coming out now Jimmy.”

“Kayla, please just hear me out, Ma. We can go to my room and talk or least let me give you ride to where ya'll stayin'."

“No, talk to me when your sober and not saying what you want me to hear because you saw someone take an interest in me.” Kayla said unlocking the door, storming past Jimmy and out of the club with Rhea and Jade right on her heels.

“I told yo’ ass but you wouldn’t listen to none of us. Now you in a bigger mess.”

“Twin, not right now.”

I had to find Kayla, it was so much I had to tell her. Heading outside I saw her hugging Rhea.

“Look, I don’t know what you did in there, but she is a mess. Meet me at our breakfast spot in the morning at 8 am. Don’t be late Jey.” Bianca’s intense stare daring me to be late tomorrow.

“I’ll be there, sis.”

“You just couldn’t resist makin’ an ass out yourself, could you?” Roman asked walking towards me as I shot him a look and Bianca shook her head before walking off.

“Man, I’m out, I’ll see ya’ll sometime tomorrow.” “So you were serious about not leaving for Atlanta tomorrow. You acted like this morning you had some much to do before we head back out on the road.” Sefa throwing my words back up in my face irking me to no end.

“Plans change, I asked to be added me to the house show for tomorrow anyway. Plus, my home is wherever Kayla is and I ain’t leavin’ Pensacola without my girl. So, get ready to see me all weekend fam.”

“Just know when to back off twin, we all hope you and Kay can work it out but don’t come on too strong.”

“Jimmy, I can’t let her go back to Savannah not knowing how I feel.”

A’ight, we know and we got your back.”

I wasn’t going to come on too strong, but I definitely was getting Kayla back one way or another.

---

The Next Morning

Blaster’s Cafe

Bianca’s POV

Jade and I decided to come hear Jey out and see where his head is at. I can honestly say he’s done a lot of growing up these last six months but Jade was still on the fence Kayla is her cousin

“How do we know mean it? You could be just sayin’ what we all wanna hear,” Jade accused as Jey seemed so defeated.

“Jade, I know I fucked up, but the time apart made me realize part of me was missing. I Love Kayla, it’s time I took a chance.”

“She was so broken, thinking you guys were on the right track and then her comes Cameron once again and you didn’t do nothing to stop the disrespect,” I said throwing in my two cents, but Jade was hitting it home.

My cousin got tired, Jey. She wants to be married, have kids and have a partner who isn’t going to change his mind and has no problem being committed to her and her alone.”

“Jade, I’ve never changed my mind when it came to Kayla, I just had a lot of shit going on and you know that Bee.” Jey said pointing at me as I sighed sitting down my cup of coffee.

“I know but it’s been five years since Carmen, Jey. But you and I both know Kayla would never do what she did to you. She helped you get through it and saw what it did to you.”

“I know Bee.”

“Then I’mma need you to act like it bro. Stop letting her come in and make you second guess yourself.”

Jey’s POV

“Ya’ll have known each since ya’ll were teenagers, Jey. Name one time Kayla ain’t been there as your friend, or lover. Like people get tired of the back in forth and people not seeing their worth.” Jade scolded as I rubbed my temples feeling a headache coming on.

It was too early for this conversation, but they were right. I felt even more like shit remembering the times Kayla and I would be so close to putting a label on what we were. Then almost like clockwork, I’d get scared, push her away and say I needed space.

I was runnin’ from her love because I felt underserving, and I didn’t want to screw it up.

“Jade, I’mma be real wit you and Bee. I was scared of Kayla; I knew she was the one for me, but I was fighting it tooth and nail but I’m tired of fighting it. Kayla is it for me.” I said truthfully as Bianca nodded in understanding.

“So, what you saying? Bianca asked as I sighed knowing now was the right time to let them know my intentions especially if they are willing to help me.

“Kayla is my future; I want her to be my wife and the mother of my children someday when we’re both ready. She means everything to me, and I have no intention to leave Pensacola without her.”

“Well, if want Kayla to be all those things, are you going to keep livin’ in the past?” Jade asked refusing to make it easy on me.

“No Jade, I love Kay-”

“Good, because if you were, there is no future between ya’ll and you might as well leave her be.” Jade said without hesitation. Damn, she was a ball buster but I’m glad Kayla her cousin looking out for her.

“I know, that’s why I’m here. I love Kayla, I always have. I know I took her for granted but I never will again,” I said pleading my case as Bianca looked at me with a small smile before looking back at Jade who finally nodded.

“Fine, we will help you but don’t make us regret this,” Bianca said reaching into her bag pulling out a piece of paper and giving it to me.

“This is our schedule and addresses of everywhere we will be this weekend. We are having her little dinner party after the house show Tomorrow at the Westview. Come dressed and ready to plead your case.”

“If you leave now, you might be able to catch her before they leave the rental we’re staying at. Rhea just text me and said they about to eat before they head out. We’re going to meet them at the boat," Jade said as I smiled.

“I love ya’ll so much,” I said leaning over and giving them a hug before getting up to leave.

“Good luck, bro!” Bianca yelled as tore out of the cafe.

She did say talk to her when I was sober. Getting in the car I texted Rhea to let her know I was coming and to not leave.

Traffic wasn’t too bad, but I was getting stuck by every red light. “Damn, come on…Please still be there,” I mumbled finally pulling the driveway of their rental sighing in relief seeing their van rental still there.

“Good lookin’ out Rhea.” I whispered getting out, seeing her come out on the porch alone.

“She’s upstairs putting her shoes on; I’m going to wait in the van. Don’t upset her, I want her to enjoy this weeken. I don’t want to go to jail for killing you.”

“Rhea, I’m not, I promise,” I said giving her a hug before going inside nervously waiting for her to come down.

“Rhea, I changed my shoes like you said, but can you at least give me a hint about where we are going?” Kayla rambled coming down the steps.

“Good morning, Kay.”

“What are you doing here, Jey?” she asked coming towards me but looking out the window.

“Rhea ain’t left you, she’s just waiting in the car. I just wanted to talk, you did tell me to talk to you when I was sober.” I said shrugging my shoulders trying to lighten the mood.

“Yes, I did, but I didn’t mean now,” she said nervously shuffling her feet.

“I want to apologize, you were right. It wasn’t fair to you how I would always push you away.” I paused waiting for the anger from her, but it never came, she was actually listening to me.

“Truth is I wasn’t drunk last night, and I meant what I said. My heart does belong to you.”

“Can you wrap this up Jey, because I got somewhere to go.” Kayla said getting irritated.

“I’m tryin’ to tell you that I love you, and I want us to be together Kayla. I promise it will be different, these six months without you I been a mess. Just ask everybody, I really missed you.”

“Yea, until Cameron comes around with her drama, and you begin to doubt what we are to each other. You never even tried to find me Jey.”

“Kayla, I know you live in Savannah, I found out where you went the day you left. I even moved to Atlanta to be close to you so if anything happened, I could get to you.”

“But why didn’t you come to see me, and tell me how you felt? It’s been six months Jey.”

“Kayla I was scared as fuck. I mean for the first time ever, you had just told me you wanted space from me. You were hurt and fed up and I understood it. Just looking in your eyes that night, I knew any wrong word or move would have caused you to walk out of my life forever.

“Josh-”

“Just listen to me please,” I pleaded as Kayla nodded her head and folded her arms, trying to keep her tears at bay.

“I didn’t want to lose you, so I wanted to give you some time, like you always gave me. You ain’t never asked me for nothin’ Kayla, so the one thing you asked me for I was going to give you even though it killed me to do it.”

“Did it dawn on you that maybe just once I wanted you to fight for me, Josh. Fight for us and show you understood where I was coming from and that I wasn't in this alone.”

“Kayla, I know I made it hard for you to love me-”

“No, I let you talk, now let me finish. Josh, I wanted you to show me what I mean to you instead of me always trying to make you see that I love you and that you love me.”

“I do love you and want to be wit you Kayla."

"Then prove it, stop letting the past control your future!” Kayla cried as I reached out to touch her but she side steped me and started toward the front door.

“Baby don’t push me away,” I begged as she wiped her tears. “I have to go, Rhea’s waiting for me.”

“Can we at least talk a little more at the house show tomorrow?” I asked as Kara ignored me, hurrying outside. “Why does she have to be so fuckin' stubborn,” I muttered closing the door behind me, rushing to catch her before they left.

Y"ou alright?" Rhea asked as Kayla nodded getting in the front seat.

“Please Kayla,” I pleaded as she closes the door.

“Kayla, he’s begging."

“I’ll be around, Jey. If guess if you find me, it’s fate,” she whispered making me smile.

“Trust me, I’ll find you....I'll alway find you, because wether you know it or not, it is fate Kay Kay.” I said knowing she loved it when I called her that.

Trying her hardest not to blush, Kayla quickly put on her shades and stared straight ahead. Rhea, getting a kick out of the exchanged winked at me.

“We’ll see you, Jey.”

“Yea, count on it Rhea, I’ll be seeing ya'll.”

I felt I was making a little headway, but I had a long way to go. Heading back to the car I called Sefa.

"Well I see you still alive Bianca and Jade didn't kill you, yet."

Yea, I lived to tell the tale. Sefa, I need you to get in contact with that florist that did those roses for mom a couple years ago."

“Which one?”

“The one that does the big bouquet of roses, I need them done by tomorrow and I want them gold. If they don't have gold, red will do."

“Jey, what you up too now?”

“I’m getting my woman back, now are you gon’ help me or not.”

“I’ll see can they have the red done for you to pick up before the show.”

Thanks, bro, I appreciated it. I owe you one."

“You welcome, just make this opportunity count."

“Oh, I'm plannin' on it.”

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