#fic: cd

[the-hilda-librarians-wife]

Carpe Diem - Chapter 3

Pairing: Sketchbook (Kaisa/Johanna)

Summary: Carpe diem: one of the five latim mottos of the arcadist, or neoclassical movement. Literally translates to "seize the day"

Picking up where Locus Amoenus left off, this fic follows the lives of Kaisa and Johanna for a couple weeks as their feelings grow and develop.

Notes: Sorry but infodumping/letting someone infodump to you are the ultimate love languages

Read it on ao3 or read the first installment on this verse or read the second installment on this verse

A recurring theme that they noticed on the stalls was that they were mostly decorated and selling a couple of products related to Halloween already, never mind that they were still in September.

Another recurring thing that didn’t escape Johanna, was how excited Kaisa got whenever they passed by stalls that displayed such things. Whenever they walked by a particularly interesting Halloween decoration, or an artist who had selected some “creepy” or darker products to put in front of their stall, Kaisa gasped just loud enough for Johanna to hear, and very subtly bounced up and down on her heels. Very subtly, in a way that she was sure she only had noticed because she was walking oh-so-close to her. It didn’t really surprise her that Kaisa hadn’t been expecting her to pick up on it, because clearly the girl had been underestimating how closely Johanna paid attention to her.

Not that she hadn’t been doing that from day one, that is.

“You really like Halloween, don’t you?”

Kaisa turned to her with wide eyes when she asked it, like she’d been caught doing something she shouldn’t.

“Yeah, kind of. It’s silly though.”

“New rule!” Johanna’s sudden chirp made Kitty look at her like she’d grown a second head. “You’re absolutely not allowed to hold back on what makes you happy, or to feel bad for it. Let’s try this again. You really like Halloween, don’t you?”

Kaisa could only look down at her feet, hoping the black and purple hair that fell over her face covered the way she was absolutely failing to hold back a smile, uselessly biting at the inside of her lips to try to stop them from stretching.

“I really do. I was really obsessed with witches when I was younger, and Tildy always fueled my passions. She gave me every book on every subject I asked for, and an obsession with witches melted into an obsession with Halloween, which became one with the historical roots of the holiday and the Celtic people. Honestly, it’s one of the reasons why I chose to major in History as well as English.”

Success, Johanna thought, looking down at Kaisa who was now displaying the most adorable smile on her lips. She’d always been somewhat aware of the height difference between them, but like this she could see very clearly that Kitty was at least a full ten centimetres shorter.

“That sounds so fun!” As she assured, Johanna wondered how many other interests Kaisa had that would make her sound so alive when she spoke about them. It was kind of sad to know that they were all most likely being neglected, though. With how furiously Kaisa focused on college, Johanna doubted that left her much time to learn about anything that wasn’t related to her lectures. If she had any say in it, though, she’d make sure Kaisa spent as much time engaging with the things that made her happy as possible. “Do you have plans for this Halloween? We could spend it together, if you’d like.”

The look Kaisa gave her was shimmering at first, before being clouded by disappointment. “I’m afraid I have. Tildy forces Frida to go trick-or-treating every year, and makes me go with her. It’s one of her many strategies to force us to have a night of rest from studying. I already promised I’d be doing it. Frida wants us to dress like characters from a cartoon she likes.”

Even though Johanna smiled as Kaisa answered it, bemused at the image of two workaholics being forcibly kicked out of their home to ask for candy (Kaisa’s mother sounded more charming by the minute), Kaisa didn’t feel content about completely turning down her invitation. It was something she’d very much like to do, and she’d hate it for Johanna to get the wrong idea.

“We could do something the day before, though!” She rushed to assure her, terrified that Golden might think she’d been giving an excuse. “Or the day after. Even if it’s not Halloween related, I’d just love to hang out-”

Johanna gave her hand a reassuring squeeze, sensing her distress. “I’d love it too! I’m sure we’ll think of something nice. What characters are you and your sister dressing as?”

It was hard for Kaisa to even contain her sigh of relief when she understood that Johanna really didn’t feel like she was being brushed off. “Amity and Lilith, from The Owl House. Do you know it?”

They kept on walking, Johanna’s brow furrowed in thought. “Isn’t that the gay rights cartoon? I think I saw it on twitter.”

“Yeah, you’re probably thinking of the right one. Frida hasn’t said anything about liking girls or boys yet. I think she’s still very young to have that figured out. But I’m willing to bet that Tildy has some sort of magical filter that she uses when making adoptions that miraculously points her to the lesbians, honestly.”

Johanna was glad she hadn’t been drinking anything. If she had, she certainly would have choked on it and it would have spilled through her nostrils, and it would not have been a pretty sight.

“Gosh, I need to meet your family.” Johanna said through her laughter, happy to see that Kaisa had joined her in on it. “Radical change in topic, but I am starving. Want to grab a bite?”

“Sure!”

Funny, Johanna thought. Even her single worded answers sounded more full of life now.

They skimmed through the next stalls, since most of the food ones were deeper into the market, and only stopped for one that caught Kaisa’s attention. It sold small, handmade perfumed candles, and anyone that passed by the two of them while they were there would have thought they were clinically insane with the way they frantically picked candles of each available scent to smell it, discussing which were the best ones. While they came to the consensus that the coffee bean and vanilla one was the champion, Johanna for the most part was drawn to the wildflowers and tea scented ones, while Kaisa didn’t relinquish her opinion that the apple and cinnamon candle was special. Johanna left empty handed out of pure self control (the tons of unburned candles in her bedside table’s drawer would certainly not appreciate it if she brought home another one just to abandon it), but Kaisa purchased both their favourite candle and the one that smelled like apple pie.

Once more food vendors began popping up, their nostrils were assaulted with the scent of every kind of food you could imagine, which honestly felt like karma for so desperately smelling everything on the candle stall. One of the first stalls had a large metal bowl at its centre, and bags of powder of many colours around it, and there was a child walking away from it with an enormous blue and purple cloud on a stick.

“Cotton candy!” Johanna exclaimed when she spotted it. “Would you like it?”

Kaisa scrunched her nose. “Not really. It’s so… sticky. The texture isn’t really my jam, I guess. But you go ahead and get it! I’d love to see you try and eat that, it’s bigger than your head.”

Showing her friend her tongue, she tugged her hand to invite her to continue walking. “Nah, that’s okay. I’m not too fond of the taste, I just think it’s fun to eat it.”

“Once again, I won’t be the one to stop you.”

“No, but you’ll be the one to take pictures of me with cotton candy stuck in my hair and blackmail me with them later.”

“Fair enough.”

They took a while to look at all of the available options, paying close attention to the other market attendees who walked past them holding any sort of food so as to make an informed decision. The ultimate winner was a stall frying beignets and sprinkling confectioner’s sugar on top. If the smell of deep-fried pastry alone wasn’t enough to draw them in, the look of utter pleasure in the faces of those who they saw eating them certainly was.

Their paying time took three times longer than it should, a result of both of them arguing about how they should be the one to pay for the other while the shopkeeper looked absolutely unamused. In the end, Kaisa won and paid for them both with the argument that Johanna had already driven them here, which meant that Johanna was already plotting every sort of plan to pay for their next meal.

At the centre of the square, a couple of benches were positioned around what would be a bonfire as soon as night fell, and they took a seat on an empty one. As they bit into their beignets, neither contained the hums of delight at the sweet, warm explosion in their mouths.

After a few bites in silence, because that was definitely the kind of food that was too good to talk while eating, Johanna gasped and reached into one of the bags she had acquired while in the market.

“You know what would taste great with this?” Before Kaisa could even think of an answer, she took her jar of honey from the bag and opened it. She offered it to Kaisa first, who dipped her pastry only just enough so that her next bite would taste of honey, and then promptly poured such an obscene amount of it on hers that it began to spill and drip down her fingers.

“Hm, this is so good.” Johanna moaned. While Kaisa was sure that she wasn’t tasting the honey as much as Golden, she would admit that it gave the beignet a delicious depth of flavour.

And then she looked at Johanna and completely lost all rational train of thought.

Her eyes were closed in appreciation and her head was leaning slightly back as she chewed. What captured her attention, however, was the drop of honey that had caught on the corner of her lip, and was painfully slowly making its way down to her chin.

If a human could blue-screen, Kaisa imagined that this was it.

What was the appropriate reaction to this? Probably telling her about it and giving her one of her own napkins, since Johanna would probably already be needing hers to clean her hands. Was this what her mind was telling her to do, though? Absolutely not, because the only thing her damn brain was working for at the moment was providing her with a very vivid imagery of how nice it would be to kiss that drop of honey away from her face and into her own mouth.

With her face most definitely red at the appalling thought and her hands suddenly clammy, Kaisa wished it wasn’t weird to shake your head violently in a public space (what? At least she’d get the feeling of shaking that thought far away from her) and acted on what was probably the middle ground between those two options.

Reaching up with one of her spare napkins, she allowed her hand to float just in front of Johanna’s face.

“May I?” She asked when Johanna opened back her eyelids and looked at the offer with open curiosity. At her nod, she wiped the honey away.

“Thanks.” If Johanna’s voice was several octaves higher, Kaisa didn’t comment on it. It wasn’t like she had the credit to do that, anyway. “This is… really good.”

“Yeah.” Kaisa bit into her food again with gusto, willing her mind to allow her to forget that moment of insanity. It wasn’t creepy if she hadn’t done anything inappropriate, right?

They finished eating and without even communicating seemed to agree on just sitting there with each other for a while. Johanna extended her legs in front of herself while Kaisa sat with one knee bent and foot close to her skirt, and the other leg extended towards Johanna.

“It just occurred to me that I do not, in fact, know much about the historical roots of Halloween.” The wind played with Johanna’s curls, making her bangs swing softly from side to side.

Kaisa snorted. “Are you sure you want to go there? Get me started and it’ll be hard to get me to stop, you know.”

“I’d love to go there, actually.” She smiled. “Anything you’d like to teach me, I’m all ears.”

Sighing contently was the only thing Kaisa could think to do, really. How long had it been since anyone other than Tildy and Frida had been ‘all ears’ to her? Not only to her interests, but to anything at all? Had that ever even happened?

“Well, you see, it is generally agreed that the Celts had three harvest festivals…”

Johanna wasn’t sure how long they spent there. She didn’t care, either. All that she knew is that she’d gotten this girl who she had spent months wondering if she even knew how to speak to give her a full lecture about a topic she was passionate about. She’d never even known she had the slightest interest in druids or roman cultural assimilation or the issue with the typical definition of a “celt”, but watching the muscles in Kaisa’s face move and hearing the pitches of her voice which were apparently unlocked when she was excited made Johanna decide that that was one of the coolest topics in the world, actually. She’d be sure to check out a book on it next time she was in the library, so she could actually hold a conversation with Kaisa next time she talked about it.

At one point, Kaisa stopped talking and looked around them, letting out a chuckle.

“We have to stop meeting like this.” She quipped, but Johanna didn’t understand it. The haze of tranquillity that had come over her when Kaisa had begun her monologue still lingered, and she struggled to pay attention to anything else.

“Hm?”

Kaisa pointed to the sky by means of explanation, and to Johanna’s surprise, it was no longer blue, but somehow orange, pink and purple at the same time. Hadn’t they arrived just past three o’clock, she wondered with startlement.

“It looks so pretty from here.” Johanna marvelled. Even those masterful watercolours they had seen paled in comparison to the real thing.

Kaisa’s gaze wandered back and forth from the sky to Johanna’s face, struggling to decide which was the better view. “It really does.”

They drank in the moment greedily, knowing it was impossible to drown on such a beautiful thing (and that if it were, they would go down gladly). The sounds were softer now that night was falling and most people had left, the colours were shifting as the sun bid goodnight and a market worker worked to light the bonfire in front of them. This time, unlike the garden, Johanna didn’t have to teach her how to appreciate the moment. She wouldn’t let this one go for anything.

The flames rose up in front of them, filling the autumn air with their warmth, and Johanna extended her hands towards them gladly.

“I disagree, you know.” She said, looking at Kaisa mischievously. “I don’t think we should stop meeting like this. I wouldn’t change this for anything at all.”

Neither would I, Kaisa thought, worried at this feeling that was settling in her chest even though it felt like it was too big to fit in it, worried about her carefully selected priorities that all seemed irrelevant in the face of all this peace. Neither would I.

[pnfc]

assorted bits from historical australia au that was inspired by an old textpost. and also by 1800s naturalist lit on platypuses and other fauna

something like: charlene cajoled roger into letting heinz have a light sentence and he ultimately takes up naturalist studies. but ultimately he doesnt get credited for any of his work, and ends up unanimously blacklisted from the research community for being too much of a freak. like theyve all already figured out the secrets of the platypus but he's hung up on one particular specimen and refuses to kill him or any others to send back home for further dissection, what's up with that?

[on-a-lucky-tide]

Hi Lovely, just dropping by to say that you can totally decline weigh ins if not extremely necessary. You're a fantastic writer, you've got excellent music taste and clearly are funny at hell. Plus you can probably lift every twat nurse who tuts and scoffs at you, they shouldn't every judge you.

If you're up for it, I'd die for some NikPrice in a proper sex shop (Not a gag/gimmick one) or maybe a lil NikPrice who want to bring in a certain delightfully sassy sergeant to their dynamic.

Head up, we are all here to support you!

😊

Thank you for this, Selkie. It was a massive boost going in. So, Nikprice in a sex shop, eh? Well, obviously I had to visit Prowler to, uh, check it still looks the same as the last time I visited. Here we go...

Nik and John visit ProwlerRED in Soho as Nik helps John take those first tentative steps in exploring his sexuality.

cw: fetishwear, inexperienced and nervous sub, teasing Nikolai.

Price stood opposite the shop and stared at the giant white paw on the black banner between the ground and first floor, his hands buried deep in the pockets of his coat, his beanie pulled low around his ears to disguise the hot flush colouring them a deep red.

They stood at the crossroads. Passersby dipped into the gutter to get around them on their way down Old Compton Street and Price stepped back a little further as a cyclist hopped the pavement, swerving a stationary taxi that was blocked from turning into Dean Street. Price's eyes would make it to the window eventually, but first he needed to get over the road.

"We should go in," Nik said, exhaling the last breath of cigarette smoke as he ground it out under his boot. This had been his idea. He had spotted Price eyeing up some of the leathermen at the bar the previous evening, and teased his interest out of him under the duvet of their exorbitantly expensive hotel bed. It was hard to keep secrets from Nik when his hands and mouth were on ya... Some kinda witchcraft.

Price knew what leathermen were. It was impossible not to when your old man had been both a sergeant in the armed forces and a keen biker. It was a joining of the two things together; the latent homoeroticism of a career and a hobby that had been, at the time, completely male dominated. His old man had been predictably foul in his judgements of his fellow soldiers, but Price had been fascinated. He'd avoided looking too deeply at why he found them so--

Price was... he was interested, alright? Something about the way that the leather looked on a man's body; the harnesses, the jackets, the jock straps. He didn't much care for the caps or the police shirts. If he wanted to wear a cap, he'd give in to Mac's relentless naggin' and get promoted, you know, wear a cap that came with a bloody salary increase, and Peelers weren't exactly high in his esteem.

It was the smell and the texture of the leather against sweat, the slide of it across hard and soft curves as leashes and harnesses shifted, the sound of belts snapping together, watching the dominant partner haul their willing subordinate around and the responding trust. The relief and pleasure on faces that weren't covered by masks, moans muffled by gags. That looked good. Real good.

Imagining Nik's hand wound through a--

Price swallowed.

"John?"

"Hold up, I'm gettin' there. Don't rush me." Price bristled, shoulders rising up around his ears. He didn't even need to look at Nik to know what his face was doin'; Price could feel his grin like atmospheric pressure and it rankled him. "This ain't funny, Nik."

"It is funny," Nik said, arms folded across his big chest, open palm tapping his own elbow. "This is not live fire fight or hostage situation. You need to relax."

"I'm perfectly relaxed," Price said, immediately dropping his shoulders and sniffing when Nik raised his eyebrow. He bounced on his toes and coughed, aiming for nonchalant, but knew his eyes were wider than a rabbit's gazing into oncoming headlights. "See, fine."

"It is just a shop."

"I can see that."

"The owner is half your size."

"Oh yeah? You well acquainted?"

"Fairly."

"Course y'are." Price's cheeks reddened and he scrubbed a hand through his beard. "Alright. Ground rules. Nothin' that's sharp or... Let's just stick to the harness."

Nik hummed and started crossing the road. Price tried to grab his arm to get at least some verbal agreement, but Nik had already skipped up the opposite curb and was looking through the window. Price waited for a black cab to pass and then jogged over to stand at his side. He could see himself in the reflection of the window, hunkered low. "Is that a leather pig mask?"

"Da," Nik said, examining a full body harness with a metal cock ring at the groin. Price hazarded a glance at what had Nik so interested and his heart skipped a beat, his fingers curling into fists inside his pockets . Nik tapped his elbow. "Come." Price let Nik take his elbow and drag him through the door on the corner of the building, his breath held for... fuck knows what reason.

The first thing that hit him was the smell. The same smell as the bar the evening before, except without the added layer of sweat that had made his mouth water. It was sharp, clean. Behind the mannequins in the window were two railings of leather harnesses, and along the walls were racks of leather shirts and trousers. Fairly... innocuous, really. It could have been a biker's shop if it had helmets instead of masks, and less lube on the shelves.

"Hey," called a faintly accented voice from behind the counter, Price would guess Polish but Nik would get a better read. "Let me know if you need anything." She had enough metal in her mouth that kissing her would risk a stab wound, and Price found himself counting the studs when Nik cleared his throat.

"Da, thank you, we may need help with sizing."

She shrugged. "The best thing to do is try 'em on. There's a changing room round the corner," she jutted her thumb over her shoulder, "and two downstairs with the toys and bondage. Just no underwear, yeah?" With that, she turned back to untangling the pile of leather paraphernalia and hangers on the counter.

Nik seemed distracted by something on the far wall, so Price took the opportunity to examine the shelves behind the shop assistant. Aromas. A fair number of them, in fact. Price had seen a few of the lads holding them at the bar, but googling "aroma" and "disk cleaner" had yielded completely innocuous Amazon searches.

"You will not need those, solnyshko," Nik called, so Price continued to tentatively explore, hands still stuffed deep in his pockets.

His gaze wandered to a pile of flyers at the edge of the counter. "Boot blacking," Price murmured. "Is that what I think it is?"

"Da," Nik said softly, appearing at his shoulder with two harnesses in his hand. "It is a kink, but also good for repairing tired equipment."

"Fuckin 'ell, gettin' the troopers to buff their boots proper is like pullin' teeth, and these lot do it for jollies? Is he... Is he lickin' it?"

Nik chuckled and took the flyer out of Price's hand, stroking a finger over the bristles on Price's chin before twining their fingers together. "Perhaps if you put on a jock strap and licked their boots they might be more, hmm, proactive, no?"

"I'll run it by brass," Price said with a wry smirk, letting Nik pull him down the narrow staircase to the basement level.

His eyes blew wide once they'd adjusted to the dim lighting. Now that was what he had actually expected when Nik had said "fetish shop". The walls were crammed with an assortment of delightful looking torture devices from whips to gags to masks that covered everything but the mouth. There was a rack of staggeringly big silicone cocks, and Price felt the heat creeping back up his neck again at how bloody real some of them looked. And big. So fuckin' big.

He was so out of his bloody depth here.

The display case to the right of the stairs as they reached the bottom was filled with the weirdest collection of dildos he had ever seen in his life. He stooped down, hands on his knees, and peered inside. "Fuck me, that one's thicker than my thigh. Nik, there's no... Nik, come here. There's no way that fits. What the fuck is that meant to be?" He pressed his fingertip to the glass at what looked like a tentacle with little nodules all over it.

"John, here." Nik beckoned him over and Price sidled over to stand at his side, casting one final alarmed look into the display case. On the wall, there was an array of cuffs and collars, all with slightly different fastenings, studs and coloured linings. Nik took one of Price's hands and placed it on the nearest pair of cuffs, pressing against Price's back, his chin on his shoulder, palm on his belly to keep him close. "Choose."

"I thought we said just the harness..." Price murmured, but he could barely hear the words leave his own mouth, too fixated on the feel and smell of expensive leather. His toes curled in his boots as he pressed his fingers inside the circle of a cuff, slipping out the other side to nudge one of the metal links and stroke around the smooth edge of the buckle.

These weren't the laughably flimsy handcuffs Price had used previously in his, admittedly, limited sex life. The kind where the plastic broke through the cheap fur and cut your skin if you pulled too hard. Tokenisitic in their restraint. These were sturdy, unyielding; they would be completely unbreakable, even by a body like his. The thought of Nik securing Price's wrists to the headboard, working his hands down his body, made Price's damn prick twitch.

Nik nuzzled the side of his neck, bringing him back to the present, and he picked up a solid black pair like the ones he had seen on a man last night. They had a single silver loop each and a thick buckle. The leather was stiff, clean and unblemished, and Price flexed them a little in his palms. "Uh, these." His reward was a soft kiss just beneath his ear, and Nik reached a little higher to pluck the matching collar from the top row of hooks.

"Try them on, with your shirt off," Nik said. "I will wait here. Take your time." He placed the harness in Price's hands and nudged him towards the narrow changing cubicle. Price hesitated, glancing back up at the stairs and then into the shop proper. Nik placed a palm at the small of his back and pressed his nose to the side of Price's face. "It is fine. I will not allow anyone to see."

"Right, yeah..." Price ducked beneath a silk sash hanging from the railing as Nik nudged him forward. He figured if people were down here looking for a birch to take stripes out of them, seeing some battered old soldier in a leather harness wouldn't faze them too much. And that's what he told himself as he yanked the curtain across and shucked his shirt over his head.

The harness seemed to have more buckles than entirely necessary at first inspection, and he turned it over and over in his hands, checking the model on the label to work out how it should sit. It was sturdy, with silver studs and thick metal, and he felt that same throb of arousal as he handled it.

"John, is ok?"

"Yeah, yeah, fine, jus'... workin' it out."

In the end, Price pulled open one of the side buckles and ducked into it. The leather was chill on his skin and his nipples pulled tight as he sat the straps just above them. Once he'd fastened the buckle back in place, he glanced into the mirror through his eyebrows, hesitant.

The yellowing bruise on his ribs from the last op was beginning to fade, the scrapes all but healed into thin pink lines, and he had the usual litany of scars he was used to seeing by now.

He looked... good.

It sat well around his shoulders, framing the furred curves of his chest by sitting just above the line of his nipples, the silver d-ring between his tits. The straps beneath his arms sat just above his obliques, following the line of muscle comfortably.

Fuck, it made him look... made him look broad, strong, with his jeans belted at his narrow hips, his operation-ready athletic physique well-complemented, and he stood up a little straighter, jutting his chin. He'd expected to feel like a dog, maybe a bit demeaned, but when he flexed into the leather, heard the stiff straps creak a bit, he felt fuckin' powerful.

Next were the cuffs. He wrapped them around each wrist, turning them around until the silver rings sat on the top and the buckles beneath. The lining was slightly padded, lending to a snug fit.

"How does it feel?" Nik asked, close to the curtain.

"Yeah, s'nice. Like, uh, it fits well."

Price grabbed the collar and then pushed the curtain aside a bit, his eyes fixed on the floor as he felt the heat creeping up his neck again. He heard Nik's breath catch and then a soft curse whispered in awestruck Russian.

"Not bad, right?" Price asked, trying for cocksure but coming out shy.

Nik said nothing. He took the collar from Price's hand and wrapped it carefully around his neck, using his forefinger to stop the leather biting as he threaded the strap through. The moment it pulled tight enough for Price to feel it, he let out a soft gasp, his hands lifting to latch onto Nik's wrist, a sudden panic beating a little harder in his chest.

"Easy, solnyshko," Nik said gently, leaning in to kiss him. Price's grip relaxed, and he drew in a shaky breath. Nik took his hands. "Here, let me show you how it would feel with your wrists secure. If you feel unsafe, you must tell me, da?"

"Is... Is anyone down here?"

"Nyet. We are alone."

"Ye-yeah, right... Yeah." Price swallowed as Nik moved his arms behind his back, lifting each wrist until he could attach the cuffs to the d-ring at the back of the harness. When Nik was done, he stepped back, his broad shoulders blocking out the rest of the shop as he appraised the man before him.

"Krasivyy..." Nik said, reaching to lift Price's chin from where it was tilted down. John kept his head up as Nik's hands roamed his body, following the line of the leather straps over his clavicles to his upper chest, leaving goosebumps of pleasure in his wake.

Price watched Nik's eyes darken with desire and felt like the hottest piece of arse this side of the Thames; he flexed cheekily into the straps and Nik's lips twitched. The control in this wasn't so clear cut, was it? Price had assumed he'd be the one under the boot, but watching Nik's reaction made it clear he had more power than he'd assumed. Nik was enraptured, his arousal clear in the heated caress of his palms and fingers.

Price wanted to lean into his hands, arch like a damn cat. His stomach pulled tight as Nik stroked just above his nipples, following the line of the harness beneath his arms and making him flex and shiver. It was too much, too sensitive, and he let out a soft, strangled noise, squirming as heat gathered in his hips. He couldn't stop Nik from touching him, couldn't push his hands away, and that made his blood run south, hot and urgent. "Mm, Nik... Please... I..."

"You are... breath taking like this," Nik said, lifting a hand to hook the collar and draw Price to him. The experience of being drawn to Nik's chest like that, having to trust those strong arms would catch him, made Price groan softly. He buried his face into Nik's neck, arching only when Nik's hands swept down his back, gently stroking the burn scars at the base before dropping lower to squeeze his arse. "If I could, I would have you here."

"Fuck," Price breathed, grinding forward to feel the hard line of Nik's cock. "Guess we're buyin' this then..."

"Da, and one or two other things."

"Nik."

"Nothing sharp. Nothing to hurt you, John. I promise."

"You could never hurt me." Price had never been so certain of anything in his life.

Nik took the back of the harness and pulled Price away from him, lifting his chin so their eyes met. "This is important. So listen," Nik said. "Sometimes hurt is not physical pain in this. It can be feeling unsafe, it can be feeling too overwhelmed. I may push too far, and you must be honest with me."

Nik looked so serious and Price could only nod, the corners of his eyes crinkling with affection. Fuck, Nik cared about him so fuckin' much and it made Price's heart feel all kinds of warm. "So, what... We, uh, we need safe words and the like?" He flashed a lopsided grin and Nik kissed him on the forehead with a low chuckle.

"Da. We will discuss. Now, get dressed. I wish to get you back to the hotel."

"Yes, sir."

"John..."

"Sorry, couldn't help it."

"If you wish to call me sir in our bedroom, then I would not be opposed."

"Bet you fuckin' wouldn't..."

"I see you are going to be, what to say... a brat." Nik swatted Price's arse before he undid the cuffs from the back of the harness and drew the curtain across.

Price almost felt sad about taking the harness off, savouring the phantom sensation of it on his skin even when he pulled his t-shirt and coat back on. He lingered in the cubicle, squeezing his prick through his jeans with a grimace, and only re-emerged once it had calmed enough to be bloody discreet.

Nik was waiting at the bottom of the stairs. He was holding a coil of rope, a leash and what looked to be an anal toy of some kind. "It is remote control," Nik said with a roguish little smirk when he saw Price looking, before jogging up the stairs.

"Bloody 'ell," Price breathed, following behind him.

Nik flashed the plastic and purchased the lot, despite Price fumbling through his coat for his wallet. "This is treat for me," Nik said when Price glared at him, plucking the opaque black bags from the counter.

"'M worried what I've unleashed here," Price replied once Nik had thanked the assistant and they were heading for the door.

"Ah, I believe it is I that have leashed you, no?"

"Ha-fucking-ha, corny bastard."

Nik grabbed John's hand and looked far too proud of himself, his smile so bright and handsome that Price's heart felt light. He didn't let go of Price's hand as they strolled back towards the station, and Price felt his heart swell as he glanced down at their intertwined fingers, his lower lip between his teeth.

Today was a day of firsts: his first visit to a bloody sex shop, and the first time in his life he had ever held a lover's hand, head up, chest out, as he walked down the street. When in London, eh?

[the-hilda-librarians-wife]

SADIE. MY LIEGE. THIS IS AMAZING. No but I’m soooo honoured something I wrote inspired you to do art, I love this so muuuuch 😩😩 the bajilion of hearts around them, yes, this is exactly the atmosphere in this fic. And the way Kaisa seems to be looking at Johanna, Johanna seems to be daydreaming, and only Edmund is actually noticing the hearts all around them is sooo on point. Thank you so much for sharing this, made my day <33

I’m sooooo not. Have enough energy to do this but @the-hilda-librarians-wife’s fanfic has me. In a chokehold. Go read carpel tunnel guys. Wait that’s not it

[ottpopfic]

“Are you getting all puppy possessive again?” Leo laughs

“I married you”

“That you did, I married you back”

“Your mine, forever”

“Oh mi cielo,” he takes Jason’s face in his hands “I already was”

Jason kisses him, and kisses him and kisses him. He kisses him until natural oxygen is hard to draw in and he has to make his own to feed into his husband, breathing into him just as much as he takes his breath away. Its desperate and claiming and Leo gives back as good as he gets, his own breath going superheated against Jason’s lips becoming visible between them with the temperature difference. It would burn if Jason wasn't so resistant to temperature spikes, so instead he just licks into his husband's mouth and does everything in his power to drink him down

[b0amagination]

Tastes of Whumptober: Day 11

I had an absolute blast with this prompt and I've been looking forward to it for a while. I should've gone and bought some wine so I could write being IDed from experience though. Unrealistic writing 😮😮😮

Convenience Store

Each item was set neatly on the conveyor belt.

A roll of duct tape. Kleenex. Air freshener. Trash bags. Zipties. Rubbing alcohol. Superglue. A bottle of merlot. Disinfectant. Sponges. Latex gloves. A wrist brace. Ibuprofen. A hammer. And a bar of chocolate.

A bright beep sounded as the cashier scanned each one.

“Doing some home improvement?” They smiled, placing the superglue onto the other side of the conveyor where one of their customers, the shorter of the two, was busy bagging with their head down. The other stacked the empty shopping basket with the others and pulled out their wallet.

“Definitely an improvement project,” they nodded back with a knowing look. “The whole thing just needs to be demolished and rebuilt at this point.”

“Oh I hear you. A pipe burst in my basement just last month and my spouse had to stop me from tearing the whole thing down then and there.” The cashier scanned the wine and paused. “Your ID please, Mx.?”

They flashed it with a toothy grin. 

“I’m flattered!”

“Just doing my job. Thank you.” They typed something into the system and picked up the next item. A few items later, a snort broke their calm demeanor.

“Hm?”

“Oh my goodness, I’m sorry Mx! Just had a funny thought.” The cashier scanned the hammer. 

“Do share! Lord knows we could use the humor.” They elbowed their partner who smiled meekly and nodded along, balancing with a crutch under their arm. 

“Well, sometimes home improvement supplies look a lot like premeditated murder supplies,” they giggled, and the taller one broke out into raucous laughter. The shorter just shook their head. “Sorry, I meant no offense.”

Realizing they were being addressed, they fixed the sullen expression across their face.

“Ah, none taken! I’ve just had a tough day, what with this shithead and all.” A playful poke to their partner who just laughed again.

“You’re in for it when we get home!” They stuck out their tongue.

The other went back to catch the items they’d missed in that time, slipping the chocolate bar in their pocket. 

“Alright, cash or card?”

“Card please.”

“Your receipt?” 

“Sure, why not.”

“Perfect. Have a good one!” 

“You too!”

The taller one took most of the bags, but the other still managed to carry one. They were almost out the door when a voice shouted out.

“Oh! Excuse me, I think you forgot one of your items!” The cashier held up the hammer, and the couple turned around. Neither came forward to claim it, but with a nudge and a whisper, the shorter allowed the cashier to drop it into their bag. “Can’t do any demolition without that, can you?” 

“Absolutely not, I’m glad we didn’t forget it!” The other didn’t say a word, struggling to lift the bag now, and then the two were gone. 

.

“Interesting what you choose to forget, darling.” A hissing whisper in their ear, so different from the friendly persona they put on in public.

“I don’t… I don’t know what you’re implying,” they averted their eyes as the trunk of the car opened. Fuck. 

Their captor’s foot landed on their broken ankle and they had to suppress a scream.

“I let you have one good leg for today. Don’t let me regret it.” The bag was taken right out of their hand. “In.”

They crutched up to the passenger door but a clearing of the throat stopped them.

“Childlock doesn’t work on that seat.”

Somehow, climbing into the back was more humiliating after that comment. The door was slammed shut before they could do so themself, and they felt the car shake with how hard the trunk was slammed. A horrible indicator of what was to come.

“I behaved around the store,” they grumbled when the doors locked and the engine turned on. 

“And then you fuckin’ ruined it.” 

“Black and white thinking much…” 

A fist flew against the passenger headrest and they were suddenly grateful to be flinching in the backseat.

“I’m buying a car with blacked out windows. That way, next time, I can throttle you in the backseat.”

[killugonficlibrary]

Hi! Not sure if this fic is already on here, but if not PLEASE check out Double-Edged Crown by cyberflamingo on Ao3! It is probably my favorite fic of all time!

Double-Edged Crown by cyberflamingo ( T | 107,683 | 16/16 )

The wealthiest families in Yorbia are given the opportunity of a lifetime when their daughters qualify to compete for the prince’s hand in marriage.

Only one contestant isn’t excited to participate. Killua, a mercenary forced to take his sister’s place, just wants to be eliminated so he can stop cross-dressing and return to work. But things take a turn for the worse when he finds himself succeeding despite his best efforts to fail—and as the competition continues, he begins to suspect the prince may have a couple of screws loose.

Because if Killua’s pass rate is any indication...the man has some very strange requirements for his future wife

This fic~ is immediately and without question one of my all-time favorites. Utterly hilarious & charming. Authentic friendships. I felt the stellar-story flutters and laughed way too actually-out-loud-ly. Thanks for the rec! ^^

~ gabs ʕ•ᴥ•ʔ

[johnslittlespoon]

i know it came out a few years too late for tough and sweet, but i'm currently thinking about john and gale fucking in gale's truck with sex on fire playing on the radio 👍🏻 some quiet country road, windows rolled down because it's too hot to deal with them fogging up, muggy summer air, clothes half–off, hands sliding on sweat–slick skin, etc

[pinksilvace]

what is this funny circus thing you keep posting about. it has captivated me

RUBS MY HANDS TOGETHER IN A VERY EXCITED MANNER LIKE A FLY WHO HAS DISCOVERED STRAWBERRIES

Cirque du Soleil ("circus of the sun") is a Montreal-based company that's been producing animal-less circus shows since 1984 (you may recall a joke about this from Madagascar 3 lol). Most follow a very basic plot of "[character] gets isekai'd for approximately 1h38m then goes home" but it's honestly so much more fun to make up stories one one's own imho. They're also usually composed in Grommelot, an invented language that's usually a mix of multiple languages and gibberish - i.e., it's not supposed to be understood.

A little-known fact about me is that I grew up watching recordings of these shows (because ALMOST EVERY SINGLE ONE HAS A PROSHOT 🙏) and love them to bits. I've seen Alegria (pre-revival), Kooza, and Kurios live as well.

The official CdS youtube channel has been uploading tons of compilations since 2020. This year, to celebrate the company's 40th anniversary, they've also been releasing a bunch of abridged versions of their shows, which you can view on youtube here.

I'm going to yammer on about my 3 favorites under the cut now :))))

1: Varekai

oghhghgh my gosh I love this show. so much. absolutely devastated it's not touring anymore :(. If they ever bring it back then I NEED to see it. You understand

This has one of the more plotty premises: rather than falling to the sea and dying, it begins with Icarus falling into a strange land and healing through the power of... love? Communal support? It doesn't really matter because the MUSIC and the STAGING and the COSTUMES oh my GOD the COSTUMES. It's such a bright and fun time with good vibes all around and I cannot recommend it enough. Bonus for Greek mythology references. Did I mention the COSTUMES

2: Quidam (2 and 3 are interchangeable for me, depends on my mood)

CdS claims that this show isn't about much. This is a lie. I could write SO MANY ESSAYS on the symbolism in Quidam and all the different interpretations people have about it. Its soundtrack is also an absolute banger that I love listening to on my own time.

The only thing to be aware of before going into Quidam is that it's a bit of a downer. I think it's the most somber of any CdS show I know of.

3: Alegria (original)

Possibly the most well-known CdS show. No joke, I think I've been watching this proshot for my entire life. I think I saw this proshot before I ever saw a cartoon.

Another great soundtrack - I like the original 1994 recording the best. Francesca Gagnon is ICONIC as the singer in white.

This is one of the few non-isekai shows out there; it depicts a kingdon that has just lost its king and shows a brewing tension between the "old birds" in the aristocracy and the young upstarts who hope for structural change.

Mystère may have been the show that solidified the CdS format, but Alegria is so ridiculously well-known and unforgettable that it's always struck me as the cirque show. It makes for a great entry point.

[unluckyhoneybee]

It will work (Connor dewar)

Long time friends that finally get together... Fluff.

There was a crack on the wooden floor that made you look up. Connor was looking at his foot, nose scrunched up and frozen. His eyes then slowly moved to you.

You chuckled.

"I was trying to be quiet."

You patted the seat and moved to make him space. He quickly sat down, but kept some distance.

You silently offered him your beer, which he took.

"I don't know what I'm doing" He simply scoffed before taking a sip.

"What do you mean?"

You knew well what he meant.

It was someone's party, that highschool friend that lived by the river and had a cool house with a big backyard. Obviously you knew Connor would be there. You had seen each other a couple of times this past week. He knew you'd be there too.

You had chatted at the beginning of the night. After all, you had always been friends. Feelings apart. But then the beers started getting into your head and you had to move away. You knew yourself well enough to not be trusted drunk around Connor Dewar, for what could be said and done. So did he. So you both migrated to different sides of the house. He found a spot with some brunette from the neighbor town and you with the electrician son.

But it wasn't right. It didn't feel right.

Connor heard someone say you were having some fresh air at the back when he was on the verge of screaming. He had nothing against Claudia, the brunette. But she just... Why was she getting on his nerves like this?

"I mean that..." He stopped to take a deep breath and straight his back. "Last year you were with Adam. The year before and the other, I was with Ellie. Joe, Ricky, and Marie"

You felt a knot in your throat. It was easy to see where it was going.

"I was with Marie and you were with Ricky when it happened." That fight. You remembered that fight and how it lead you to break up with your then boyfriend. Marie never knew about it, though.

"But now..."

"Now? Now what Connor?"

You needed him to be brave, to be the one taking the step this time. You needed to see him fight for it, not just follow you lead.

"Now we both are single and losing our time with a girl I've never seen and the electrician's son"

His eyes were on the beer he had now completely stolen from you. He couldn't look at you now. But you wanted him too. You needed him to look at you in the eyes and say those words again. The words he said on the lake when he was still dating Ellie.

"Tell me, Con" You muttered as you cupped his cheek. "You tell me what you want"

His eyes scanned your face for a few seconds, trying to find some sign that told him you didn't want this just as much as him. But he couldn't. Your eyes were bright and there was a smile fighting in your lips.

"Connor..."

"I'm still in love with you. I can't get rid of it" He whispered.

"Why?" You pressed only a bit more.

"Because I don't want to"

You smiled and grabbed the beer from his hand and put it away.

"And what are you gonna do about it" You whispered on his lips.

"I'm not sure"

"Should I?"

"Rpobably, yeah" He chuckled nervously but still turned his body to you.

You giggled and finally kissed his lips. It was as if both bodies finally relaxed after years of longing. There was no girlfriend somewhere in the house this time, or guy in talking stage thinking he was the one. It was just you and Connor, finally.

It had been years of loving gazes, soft touches and long hugs, fights and hidden feelings... And his hands were on your back and you were kissing so deep and slow.

"Con-" You pulled back a bit.

"What, are you okay?" He asked worriedly. His thumb caressed your cheek.

"no. Uh. Yes. Sorry" You chuckled. "It's just... I still want you. I mean, you already know. But I hadn't said it. I'm still in love with you"

Connor smiled yo big, but instead of kissing you again, he simply hugged you. He pulled you to his side and craddled you on his arms.

"It will work. I will make it work" You heard him say from your place on his chest.

[the-hilda-librarians-wife]

Carpe Diem - Chapter 9

Pairing: Sketchbook (Kaisa/Johanna)

Summary: Carpe diem: one of the five latim mottos of the arcadist, or neoclassical movement. Literally translates to "seize the day"

Picking up where Locus Amoenus left off, this fic follows the lives of Kaisa and Johanna for a couple weeks as their feelings grow and develop. Updated weekly.

Notes: >:)

Read it on ao3 or read the first installment on this verse or read the second installment on this verse

It was barely past 6 am when Johanna got the message. True, it was probably a little inhuman to shoot someone a text before eight in the morning on a Saturday, but considering that Johanna was usually already awake at that time, it wasn’t like she could judge. That morning was only different because she’d stayed up later than usual with her friends the night before, and the dull pain behind her eyes let her know that her body hadn’t gotten its due of slumber yet.

Even though her brain told her to go back to sleep, she’d already gotten a glimpse of the name on her screen. It didn’t surprise her at all. If anyone out of all the people she knew would be awake at that time, it would be Kaisa. Save for Edmund, of course, but he was probably also still sleeping after their late game and pizza night. What did surprise her was that it was a voice message. Kaisa never sent her those.

She unlocked the cellphone and pressed play on the message, letting Kaisa’s voice, still with a morning roughness that meant she hadn’t woken up long ago, wash over her as she laid back down and closed her eyelids.

“Hey, Anna.” She began tentatively. “Good morning, I hope I’m not disturbing you. I just… wanted to thank you again. For yesterday, and for everything else. You really are very good to me. Tildy thinks so too. And Frida. So, thank you.” 

A smile spread over Johanna’s face. At the same time that she sounded sincere, she also sounded like she was reading from a script. Like she had been rehearsing what to say in her head so as not to forget once she started recording. It also didn’t escape her that apparently she’d talked even more about her to her family, and that Johanna seemed to have their approval.

Her sleepy mind did not manage to pick up on the fact that Kaisa clearly wanted her to know she had that approval, though.

“Also, Frida told me that the Scouts will be hosting a fundraiser today.” She said after what sounded like a deep breath to gather enough resolve. “They’ll be selling out picnic kits. I was wondering, if you’re free, would you like to go with me so we can spend some time together? Don’t worry about it, though, I know we’re all packed with college stuff to do.”

There was a pause. It sounded like Kaisa wanted to add something, but didn’t know what, or if she should.

“Um, that was it. Let me know when you can. Bye.” 

As much as Johanna’s eyes screamed at her to not look at a screen, Kaisa would be able to see that she’d received and listened to the voice note, and she didn't want to leave her hanging. She managed a quick text assuring her that she’d love to, but put her phone on silent before she could get any texts back about what time they’d meet. They’d sort that out later. For now, Johanna went back to sleep with a dreamy smile tugging at her lips.

                                                     ……… 

The weather closer to the town centre was radically different from that on campus. Where at home it had been drizzling slightly, there it was cloudless and the sun shone as brightly as it could for an October day.

After she’d woken up both body and soul, Johanna had made the appointment to be at the green area closest to the Sparrow Scouts headquarters at about four in the afternoon. Kaisa wouldn’t need to be driven there, she’d assured. She’d be going earlier to keep her sister company.

However, when Johanna arrived, Frida was nowhere in sight, and Kaisa was waving shyly at her from the spot she’d picked them under an Ash tree. She’d already set up their picnic, with a variety of baked goods, spreads, fruits and a couple of cold cuts, all on top of a towel that was white with a flowery pattern. There were other people sitting around the park with similar arrangements, but a quick glance told Johanna that Kaisa had brought some extra food with her to add to that which the Scouts were selling in their kits.

“Hi.” Kaisa stood up when Johanna approached her, ready to accept the hug she was greeted with. “I hope you don’t mind, I picked us a basket in advance. I thought you’d like the pattern of this towel that came with it.”

“I do.” Johanna smiled approvingly. "It's very pretty. Did you sleep well?”

“Oh, sure.” They sat down side by side, their backs resting against the bark of the tree. “I was exhausted. What about you?”

“Me too. Except I went to sleep much later than I’m used to. I had to sleep until, like, ten o’clock to get rid of the brain fog.”

After picking up a buttery biscuit, Johanna looked at Kaisa only to find that she’d gone slightly pale. Or more than usual, at least.

“Oh, shoot! I didn’t wake you up, did I?”

Laughing despite the biscuit still in her mouth, Johanna wondered if Kaisa thought most people woke up at six every weekend. Her reaction made Kaisa groan and bury her face in her hands, muttering out a coy ‘sorry’.

“That’s really okay. I found out I don’t mind being woken up by you at all.”

Lowering her hands enough that Johanna could see a roll of her grey eyes, Kaisa huffed. “I’ll make sure to remind you of that when I next need help with an essay at three in the morning.”

Johanna smirked. “Please. You and I both know you never needed my help. You just wanted to have my lovely self near you and didn’t know how to ask for it.”

“Oh, damn.” Kaisa said in the most monotone voice she managed. “Now you’ve unmasked me. Whatever shall I do?”

She shoved her playfully, and they both turned to analysing the food options in front of them. If there had been any doubt left in Johanna’s mind that Kaisa had a huge sweet tooth, it was gone as soon as she saw how her first choices were always the sugariest available. She took an entire half of the (admittedly tiny) strawberry pie as Johanna spread a heap of spiced herb butter over a cracker. The lower half of Kaisa’s face was pink by the time she finished, and Johanna handed her a napkin even if she thought the image was adorable.

“Sorry again for Abigail’s behaviour last night.” She said as she gave her the piece of paper. Since she’d come to the conclusion that the sweet biscuit had been more worth her while than the cracker, she decided to try another sweet food, a piece of the banana and apple bread. It turned out to have been the right decision, the taste rich and cinnamon-y. When she had joined her friends again after having dropped Kaisa off the night before, they had tried to pretend nothing had happened, but none of them had been pleased with Abi. Only Johanna had been truly mad, but even the rest of them had been clearly disappointed by her conduct. In the end, she’d left earlier. No one had asked her to, of course, but she seemed to have sensed they needed some time to forget about it.

“It’s no matter.” Kaisa shrugged, pretending to be more interested in the bizarre amount of pink that had come off of her face on the napkin than in the events of the previous night. “I really didn’t feel any hostility on her part. Why do you think she acted like that, though?”

Johanna took a pause, and a breath. She knew exactly why Abi had said that. The real question was, was Kaisa ready to hear it? 

She’d been giving her what Johanna sincerely hoped were hints for a while now; singing love songs with her, telling her she made her life better, texting her sweet ‘good morning’ messages filled with emojis, arranging this sweet little picnic for them… and yet, she’d never made an actual move. It could be that Johanna had severely misinterpreted everything, and she was simply excited about their friendship. But if there was even a small chance that Kaisa might be interested in her romantically, and Johanna sincerely hoped there was, she’d come to the conclusion that she would have to be the one to take that step.

Well, she better not throw away an opportunity, in that case. Carpe diem, Johanna thought. Let’s see if I actually learned anything from that seminar.

“Abigail isn’t at all mean, but she isn’t daft either. I hope it’s not too self centred of me to say this, but I got the feeling she was jealous of you.”

Her eyes opening wide, Kaisa’s lips parted in surprise as she blinked. “Wait, of me? Why the hell would she be jealous of me?”

It was impressive, in Johanna’s opinion, how someone could both be the smartest person she knew and not have a single brain cell at the same time.

“Well.” As she took a deep breath, her nerves got the best of her, and made her stare forward into the park instead of at Kaisa. “That would probably be because I’ve been trying to flirt with you since we first met.”

When there was no immediate response, or no response at all for the following couple of seconds, to be more precise, Johanna worried that she’d screwed up beyond repair. So then she forced herself to look back at her friend’s face, and try to understand if it was an ‘apologise’ moment, a ‘pretend it was a joke’ moment, or a ‘get this disaster lesbian to understand someone is into her’ moment.

It was that last one. She should have known.

The confusion was evident on her face, like half of her brain was trying to decide if it was a quip she should laugh about, and the other half was processing the implications of her having spoken seriously. Johanna bit the inside of her cheek to keep herself from smiling, wishing she could snap a picture of her and then place it side by side with that confused maths lady meme.

“Not to pressure you, but could you please say something? It’s starting to worry me.”

Kaisa’s face seemed to become even more panicked when she realised she was expected to have a coherent reaction to what was happening, and her eyes shifted from side to side like a deer in headlights, looking at every part of Johanna’s face except her eyes. Johanna sighed, a lot more amused than worried now, and placed her hand next to Kaisa’s on the towel. She wouldn't touch her without knowing if she was too overwhelmed for that at the moment, but the invitation was there in case the girl wanted to reach out.

“Kai.” She said, making sure to sound as patient as possible, and thinking of a clear way to word what she wanted to say. “Sorry to put this much pressure on you all of a sudden, but I’ve been crushing on you for a long while now and I can’t actually figure out if you feel the same, or if you’re happy with us being friends. I mean, I am, but I’d love it if we could try something more romance natured. I’ll be pleased with whatever you say as long as we can still be near each other, I just felt like I needed to put this out here so we could be clear with one another.”

Whatever Johanna had been expecting to get in answer, it was not this. Kaisa actually opened and closed her mouth a couple of times before she managed to get the words out. Each time she did so, the space between her eyebrows creased further, making her look more baffled.

“You can’t figure out if I feel the same?” Kaisa ran a hand over her hair, staring at the spot between their hands because looking directly at Johanna felt like too much at the moment, and she couldn’t risk losing the minimal amount of rationality she’d gathered by making that mistake. “Are you kidding me? I’ve been mad about you for like, almost a month at this point. I wasn’t aware of it for most of this time, sure, but I have! You don’t think I go around inviting all my acquaintances for private freaking picnics, do you?”

It was most likely not how she should react, but in the face of that sudden bluntness from someone she’d spent so long tip toeing around, Johanna couldn’t hold back a laugh. She hunched forward and buried her mouth in her hands, her shoulders shaking.

“Anna, I’m serious!” Now Kaisa was looking at her, and using her hands to gesticulate too. It only made her want to laugh harder, though out of delight or nervousness, she didn’t know. “I told you I listen to music because of you! That’s the simpiest thing in the history of ever, this isn’t fun! Do you think it’s easy having a secret playlist to listen to when I want to think about you?” 

Johanna now felt her face warm pleasantly, and a fluttery feeling take over her belly. Not wasps, she noticed, but beautiful butterflies making a garden of her abdomen.

Or maybe goth moths, come to think of it.

“Okay, okay, hold on.” She breathed when she got her giggling under control, even if it was hard with Kaisa squinting at her like she was going to send her to sleep on the sofa despite them not even living in the same house. “So what you’re telling me is that, if I wanted to kiss you, that would be alright?”

“Of course that would be alright!” Kaisa threw her hands up in the air in defeat. “Listen, I’m trying to be as direct as I dare with you here-”

She didn’t have the opportunity to finish that train of thought. Before her courage could wane, Johanna leaned forward and pressed her lips against hers. It had clearly been an unexpected move for Kaisa, but apparently also the right one, because after a millisecond of being ice still and trying to process this new development, Kaisa sighed in something that was partially joy and partially relief, and melted into it. 

It was a chaste brush of their mouths, but they drew back only long enough to look at one another with adoration before gravitating back to the halfway point between them where their lips met again. It felt like their blood was replaced with silver and stardust, like fireworks exploded just beneath their skin. Johanna captured Kaisa’s bottom lip between hers, amazed that it was just as soft as it looked, and was rewarded by gentle hands cradling the back of her head and threading into her hair. 

It took them longer than it should have to remember that they were in public, in a place filled with child scouts and their parents, and even longer to bring themselves to care about it. When they eventually did, they leaned back only the distance that they absolutely needed to, their foreheads still leaning against each other, in a way that they could feel each warm puff of breath from the other on their face.

Looking at Johanna like this, face flushed and smiling at her like she was some sort of gift, Kaisa felt caught between wanting to shout her feelings from the nearest rooftop and wanting to cry. Sure, the word ‘love’ hadn’t been mentioned, but she’d just made it clear, through words and actions, that she didn’t, apparently, know how far above Kaisa’s level she was. And since she hadn’t been ashamed to admit she’d fallen this far, maybe if Kaisa was smart she could persuade her to plummet even further. 

It should be terrifying. She’d always thought that she would never be close to anyone in this sense. She had thought she was too odd, too obsessive for anyone to truly be able to enjoy her presence beyond the show she put up for the outsiders in her life. But Johanna truly had. This woman had ever so gently lifted up her mask, inch by inch, and for some reason, decided that she liked what she saw. The thought that eventually she might lift it high enough and see something she couldn’t deal with should send Kaisa running, lest she get too attached and break her heart (and heavens know what else) trying to not be a disappointment. But it didn’t. 

From the very beginning, Johanna had taken everything that terrified her and turned it into something new and unexpected. Kaisa had handed her well written essays on why she was no good for a friendship, why she shouldn’t want to get close, why she was everything she was running from; and in turn, Johanna had picked them up with a smile, thanked her, and turned them into artful origamis which she kept close to herself like battled for trophies.

Kaisa was so afraid. She was afraid of disappointing, of not being perfect, of the future, and of everything she couldn’t control. But she wasn’t afraid of this. And, as long as the reason why she wasn’t afraid continued to look at her like there was something in her that was worth protecting, Kaisa was sure she would be alright.

[dazesanddoodles]

every house needs some music!

[overdevelopedglasses]

Sunday Six!

Phew, okay, more Ace Attorney for the crowd today, from the same WIP as last week's post. This time injecting a few silly headcanons, because why not!

No spoilers either but mentions characters from the AJ trilogy :)

Tagging... hoo boy let's hope I get everyone. @four-white-trees @ikainkspills @mike----wazowski @jichanxo @passthroughtime @skysquid22 @phantasy14 @nyxqueenofshadows

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Apollo looks at his options. There are the usual culprits: pop music CDs from Wright's childhood, a couple classical collections that seemed out of place, some CDs Apollo had gotten at Trucy's insistence, and a few CDs that were gifts from agency friends and clients. Apollo moves to grab a CD that Clay had gotten for him, a rock group whose whole shtick is space themed songs (Apollo immediately noticed the irony then, and didn't need the help of Clay's shit-eating grin). 

His hand stops a few albums to the left of its intended destination, though, at Trucy's collection of Gavineers albums. 

[likesummerrainn]

AEW Dynamite | 10.02.24

[ottpopfic]

[osaemu]

almost done with the fic, plus i need to add a couple more warnings but :,) after a long wait it is finally close to being finished :,)