#feels marginally better

[unspuncreature]

day three post op (late sry)

yesterday straight up sucked

i slept horribly the night prior, my nerve blocks wore off leaving me with pain and sensitivity everywhere, the whole day was something of a blur

super grateful that my nurse stopped by to change my dressings which are way more comfortable now and a friend stopped by to check on me and make me lunch and keep my company since my mom went back home in the morning and everyone else in my house had to work

had an edible instead of oxy to get thru the night which was much better

i think my drain sites are gonna bruise but my mastectomy sutures and graft bolsters all look good with no visible inflammation or bruising

drain output has been less and less in volume and less opaque and more pink and orangey with more clots (horrid. but normal and good lol)

had help taking my weekly t shot last night and it hurt so badly. probably because i’m living in nerve hell sensory overload rn and i was unlucky and struck a blood vessel

here’s my living room setup from yesterday. the rolling cart + side table combo has been so essential. percy took his role as lap warmer very seriously

u know the drill. chest image below the cut

peep the much improved and more stable drain port dressings. you can’t see it well but there is a much larger clear adhesive like second skin holding the gauze and drains in place, meaning the drains themselves and the sutures holding them in place are tugging WAY less. i still feel a deep ache and discomfort and sometimes sharp pain from the drains both inside and the ports but the improvement is night n day

shoutout to my nurse for fixing me up, she’s an angel

the lanyard is just for when i’m bathing which i did right after i took this pic. otherwise, i safety pin the drain bulbs to my shirt. any purple or orange you see on my skin is marker and betadine that hasn’t come off yet with scrubbing. the glue over my sutures is collecting just a little bit of lint from my shirt and just barely beginning to flake off, so it looks slightly more raggedy

as always, Qs are totally welcome. love u guys and hope ur well

[moonofmercury]

Moze is initially apprehensive about your and Jiaoqiu's relationship. Not because you're not good for him. You are. You make him smile, you make him laugh, you bring him fresh groceries when he has a hard time leaving the house, you make sure he doesn't just rot in bed all day (although you happily join him for this too). But as Moze comes to acknowledge his past, as he understands more about what it means to have people to care about and who truly care about you, he realizes how hard it is to live without people who mean so much. And if something happens to one of you, will the other survive?

It leaves Moze feeling confused. Is this jealousy? That losing one of you might mean losing you both, without care for what happens to the rest of them.

On some level, you all live dangerous lives, even if Jiaoqiu doesn't work for anyone but Feixiao anymore and diviners are fairly well guarded when they are near the battlefield. Moze knows it won't happen yet, that you are not yet so tied together, but he worries for Jiaoqiu and his fragile heart.

Moze remains his reticent self when Jiaoqiu talks about you, or when you talk about Jiaoqiu. You are undeniably good for him, and Moze can, with fond begrudging, admit Jiaoqiu is good for you too. And slowly, Moze's apprehension transforms into a more worn, tired worry touched with curiosity.

For so many years, stronger feelings have felt burned out of him. With no one to respond to his cries, they had died before they could lay half-formed in his chest. And although it is a gentle thing, the love between you and Jiaoqiu is strong enough to make Moze unsure. All he can do is keep you alive when he can. For Jiaoqiu's sake. He's not willing to let a thing like love keep you all from sharing the life you have been given.

[lilac-set]

Reminder: even if trump wins, we’ll be ok. The presidency isnt the only political position that matters, he wont be a dictator, the president doesnt have the power to remove every other part of government that keeps the president’s power in check. Also politics isnt the only thing that matters. Even if we lose some rights (which he cant singlehandedly do) we still have community, we still have activism, we’ll always be ok. We survived one trump presidency, we can survive another. We survived before gay marriage or transitioning were legal, if we have to survive that again we will. Please, no matter what happens, promise to stay alive. Youre valuable, youre important, and youre going to be ok. Its better to be overprepared than underprepared. Im not asking you to lose hope (im doing the opposite of that), im asking you to practice coping ahead, get all your coping skills ready, determine now to stay alive, because i dont want any of you to make any rash decisions later in case we get bad news and emotions are high. Make a safety plan if you need to. Make sure you’re gonna be ok

[bromcommie]

SKREEEECH.png has entered the chat

[ruelpsen]

Fuck it, I'm going to go out and say it: while I often enjoy being teased on here, a fair portion of what I receive irritates me as it's misguided at best and reeks deeply of unlearned, malicious fatphobia at its worst. Yes I want to be fatter but I'm not fat. I am a 140-lbs/63.5-kg twink despite all my efforts to gain weight. I'm not stick thin, sure, but I'm sure as hell not fat either. So why are some people insistent on calling me fat/huge/big? Are actual fat people too much for you (perhaps even in spite of you being a self-professed FA)? Is your idea of fatness grounded in equating 'not even that chubby' with 'fat' while not even being attracted to people who are actually fat? Do you solely find bloated skinny guys hot while still saying you like fat people? Or are you not attracted to fat people at all and here simply to take your fatphobia out on the people closest to your image of ideal thinness, who you'd be more openly attracted to if they lost 10-20 pounds, all while still scoffing at or ignoring the fat people at the heart of these communities?

Some of y'all really need to do better. Either own up to your love of people who are actually fat (which may entail adjusting your understanding of what fatness is), clean up your nomenclature, or don't be here. Yes unlearning biases like fatphobia takes time and effort, but your choices really are more or less that simple.

[ddarker-dreams]

You call chrollo "bro" and his brain crashes

tbh if you did this it'd inflict enough psychic damage for him to start journaling again.

[javierduffy]

javi because he comforts me

[bonefall]

I personally like Thunder's prosthetic. Explained it to my friend (who does use a mobility device, a cane and wheelchair, and listens to me rant and infodump about BB) and they agreed, it's important to know that not every person needs what someone wants to give them. It's another example of "bad ableist person does a thing that hurts a disabled person because they are bad and ableist".

Clear Sky got Jagged Peak killed and would have killed Sunlit Frost! He would absolutely force his disabled son to be "normal" and present it like a privilege. "I wouldn't do this for anyone else, it's special, why don't you want to be helped?"

Thunder Storm should toss it in Clear Sky's face. (I would say toss it into the river but we do not pollute waterways in this house)

Thank you for telling me this, and tell your friend I'm thanking them too! If they have anything else to add please forward what they have to say

Since BB!DOTC tackles some of the heaviest topics in the entire series because its canon equivalent is so dark, I think very carefully about what I do here and how I show it. I take feedback on its sensitive aspects very seriously. If I'm understanding the criticism properly, it's that I should avoid stigmatizing prosthetics by making sure Thunder Storm's not the only one with it-- which he's not! And I'll add even more.

I don't want to avoid something only because it's uncomfortable if the topic is important, and my portrayal is respectful. Ableism IS uncomfortable! There are some situations where a prosthetic is not wanted! I think the rejection of this particular one is both a good opportunity to show a type of ableism and ALSO is very fitting for the characters.

In BB!Clear Sky's mind, the villain, he's fixing an old mistake. He can't admit that he got Jagged Peak killed or take REAL accountability for it (though he will, occasionally, apologize insincerely), but deep in his bones, he knows what he did was cruel. He'll never tell anyone this because he doesn't really cognate it himself, but Thunder Storm NEEDS to take his gift.

If Thunder doesn't take it, it blows a hole in his newest story. You see, throwing Jagged Peak out was All That Could Have Been Done back then. It was a Tragedy and he simply Made A Hard Choice. He regrets it very much, But You Have To Understand.

But now? Now? Well, behold. Look at what he's accomplished since the tragic death of his little brother. His cats are well-fed, cared for, and stable enough to make such incredible advancements. If only Jagged Peak had been able to hold on longer, if only he could be here now, I could fix him.

Just like I can (MAKE YOU JUST LIKE ME) fix you.

"Everything I've ever done is for Jagged Peak. For Fluttering Wing. For you." Thunder Sky is SPECIAL, but if he rejects any gift, tries to turn down the "privileges" offered to him, in an instant that becomes ungratefulness and arrogance. He both forces him to be special, and then leverages it against him if it's rejected. "Spoiled brat, doesn't appreciate what I've worked so hard to give him."

It all goes back to him and his own guilt. He can NEVER be wrong. He can't accept his family doesn't have to be "normal" or reflect his own ability. He won't see himself as a bully, let alone a murderer. It was never about his son's comfort or finding out what Thunder Storm wants or needs, it was about his own ego.

...All that said I'm still taking feedback if there's anything else I should keep in mind, or if anyone has a counter point, especially if you also have experience here.

(In the interest of having a link trail for posterity, here's the critique/call for feedback this is in response to)

[lord-squiggletits]

I think the reason that MTMTE remains the most defining, influential, and loved series in the IDW1 run is fundamentally because, despite its many flaws, MTMTE has the power to make you think and wonder about the world beyond what's shown on the page. The character relationships are so strongly developed that it's easy to care about the characters and easy to imagine further adventures they could go on. While the myriad dropped plotlines, underwritten/underutilized characters, and worldbuilding with weird implications are all fucking maddening at times... even if it makes you mad, MTMTE makes you mad because you care and it makes you want to immerse yourself into a world that feels like it's real beyond what's explicitly shown to you on the page. It's a sandbox of a story where there's so much fertile ground for pretty much anyone with any preferred character archetype, storyline, etc to dig in.

It's just... immersive. That's the best way I can put it. It feels like it could be real and it makes you want to spend more time in it than the constraints JRO had. It makes you want to know more about it and come up with theories on how/why things function or happen the way they do. That's why it's loved and that's why it's the best series in IDW1.

[semi-completely-original]

this is how i envision childe and skirk's time together in the abyss went

[creatrixanimi]

bruh seeing posts like "this is time to organize" like man sorry to tell you but online leftists arent gonna do shit they couldnt even vote and now everything is gonna be so much worse like. Everyone who didnt vote is far too self-absorbed or lazy to do any activism that isnt reblogging inflammatory post

[natigail]

I've seen the rise, the fall and the rebirth of DanAndPhilGAMES. Honestly, I cannot believe we have arrived at this day and they obviously had to announce it in the most exaggerated and hilarious way. It's so them, and I am still trying to come to terms with the fact that we're going to get gaming videos by Dan and Phil post coming out.

I had just started watching Dan and Phil properly in the summer of 2014 and just a couple of months later, the very first video on the gaming channel dropped. Since then, the regular gaming channel videos have been such a huge comfort for me and so many others. Then came the hiatus, an indefinitely decision that caught the channel in limbo. It's made sense, in many ways leaving 2018 and entering 2019 spelled an important shift for the boys.

They retired several of their old projects, even pinof, and started to separate the entity of "Dan and Phil" and as such the gaming channel also had to go. I was gutted to see it go, but I trusted the boys were doing what they needed. And in the years that's followed, I've kept a small hope that it was never quite dead until they definitively said so. Hell, Phil had recently mentioned checking to see if Dil on the Sims save was okay, and we knew they still had that cursed Dil Howlter head from TATINOF somewhere in their nostalgia pile.

Today they used that very papier-mâché head again. The motherfucker rose from the grave and called the boys daddies, which honestly had me pausing and just doubling over in laughter at their horrified faces. And let's not even talk about the tweet an hour before the video cordially inviting us, as if it was a fucking wedding we were about to attend!

Dan and Phil are nothing if not extra, and I love them so much for it. It's been over nine years that I've followed along with their content and lives, and tonight just proved that I will never be dragged from the phandom. The instant surge of excitement, anticipation and a little dread upon seeing the invitation tweet and the video thumbnail still got me like I got into the boys yesterday. It's still so palpable in my chest even now, and I cannot stop smiling.

The gaming channel is and has always been full of comfort content for me. Dan and Phil know it too. They put it in the video, they put it in the video description, and just the way they handled this whole announcement all radiates that they're so aware of it. They know we've been here, waiting patiently, until they were ready to come back to it.

I would have accepted it if they had really decided to kill the channel, but man, oh man, I am delighted that it instead has come back from the grave. Risen with static flutter and a menacing Sims character who's story isn't quite over yet.

We get to have the regular banter back, but now with no filter at all. They don't have to conceal parts of themselves that they weren't ready to share, even if the gaming channel always felt more open and intimate.

I am extremely ready to parasocially see two domestic nerds laugh, bicker, scream and make questionable noises. I just know I will be right there besides them. Thank you to Dan and Phil for bringing back our comfort channel. It's a gift and we won't forget it.

[butchniqabi]

i know for legal reasons black student unions cant prevent nonblack people from joining, but why would you as a nb person want to join a bsu in the first place? reminds me of the nonblack people who kept asking to join my black writers server so they could "observe" or "better understand black experiences" like um. time and place!!

[idkaguyorsomething]

it’s quite fascinating how, up until this point, despite being framed as the traditional protagonist, jodio is given mostly traits that are associated with previous villains in other parts. think about it, he demonstrates greed, ambition, and a tendency towards excessive violence and short-sighted decisions. he’s even explicitly diagnosed with antisocial personality disorder and calls himself a sociopath, traits that are often associated with villains due to the lack of empathy it causes (which is a whole can of worms about the stigmatization of mental health in popular fiction, but i’m willing to give araki the benefit of the doubt and wait to see which direction he takes the story and that trait in particular in).

on the other hand, dragona is given the most traits we associate with classic heroism, being the leader and mediator of their group who advocates for holding back when jodio gets out of hand and the one that gets to experiment with the macguffin, as well as being nicer and having almost as much focus dedicated to them as their brother. the fact that, as a dark skinned person of color with an ambiguous gender identity, they’re also a rather nontraditional hero, especially in a japanese piece of media, adds another interesting layer to this.

there are two main parallels we can draw to these two: giorno and bruno, and dio and jonathan

jodio and giorno both obviously embody a lot of dio’s traits, being ruthless and power-hungry, although jodio is certainly more emotionally open and driven by personal gain than reserved and idealistic, more like a young dio than most of his sons were. whereas dragona, as a calmer team leader who follows the rules but still needs the protagonist to bail them out of a tight spot, has tons of parallels to bruno, but the fact that they’re set up as the underdog brother with more traits the story associates with heroism when their brother is a clear reference to dio brando of all characters should not go unnoticed

what i’m trying to say is that upcoming emotional drama is inevitable and it will HURT

[kikuism]

i'm so at peace with the ending now and that's the power of having an hour long conversation with my friend <333

[some-pers0n]

Every once in a while I think about the ship I've been obsessed over for close to two years now and feel like I'm ascending to another plane of reality. Like sometimes you just encounter a ship that hits every single mark and is perfect in every regard and you're left stunned how something like that can even exist