#feel the rush of my blood i’m 17 again i am not scared of death i’ve got dreams again

[digitalcalamity]

the view between villages extended has made me cry multiple times and i’ve had full body chills multiple times. this song means so much to me.

[caseadilla111]

I'm Not Scared of Death - Chuck Grant

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a/n - hiya, this is my first time writing something like this and I am not the most confident in my writing yet, hopefully this isn't too terrible but I wanted to write something a bit out of my element. Inspired by a lyric prompt I saw on here by @prxttyvixens and wanted to take it for a test run myself. Please go check out their page and work! They are GREAT!

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I could feel the rush of my blood throughout my limbs, ending in a throb when it reached my head. My left palm was warm, it felt like someone was holding me, petting my hand, comforting me. I could hear mumbles that resembled voices, but the ringing in my ears overpowered them, I couldn’t make out what they were saying.

Flashes of my life before the war began to roll out before my eyes like the film reel they put on for us so many times before. I could see myself running through the woods, chasing my friends with sticks, pretending we were soldiers amongst the trees. I saw my mother, licking her thumb to wipe dirt from my forehead. I saw my sister holding my hand as I danced with her at our aunt’s wedding. I saw myself floating on my back down stream in the creek, eyes shut and slipping further and further away from my family on shore as the cool summer breeze kissed my skin.

Suddenly I was 17 again. I was not scared of death. I was walking along railroad tracks and playing chicken in the street and diving off of the high rocks at the lake near Veterans Park. I was carefree, careless even, I was alive.

I heard the mumbling voices around me again. I wish this damn ringing in my ears would stop; it’s giving me one hell of a headache. I could feel the rush of my blood throughout my limbs, down my legs to my toes, up to my waist then to my chest, stretching to my arms and fingers, looping its way back up to my head and ending in that throbbing sensation again.

The reel of my life began again. This time I’m older. Glimpses of uniforms and screaming eagles flashed by, foaming golden ales sloshed in their glasses as I sang, with Liebgott to my right and Tab to my left. Now I’m floating, or falling rather, along with thousands of toy soldiers in the sky, round parachutes deployed carefully cradling each one of us down to the cool lush earth. The ground below lit up here and there, and just as my feet touched the grown, the grass turned to snow and frozen dirt. Warm coffee in a cold canteen cup was handed to me, the canopy of the straight trees above our heads was bare, a blue and yellow flare lit the sky for a moment. It was like staring at a comet, or a meteor and I was nothing but a prehistoric beast waiting for my untimely end.

It was night now, and I was in a hole in the ground. The earth shook, it sounded like I was in the middle of the grand finale of the local Fourth of July fireworks show back home. A rifle now replaced the cup of joe in my hands. I looked off into the rows of exploding trunks in front of me and saw a smaller, younger version of myself, running with sticks, chasing my friends, playing soldier amongst the trees. For a moment, the me from the past stopped and looked in my direction, smiling before disappearing behind the shrapnel and earth a mortar round brought up in the wake of its detonation.

Suddenly I was 17 again. I was not scared of death. I looked it square in the face.

I could feel the rush of my blood throughout my limbs, and the throbbing at the end of this rush was muted now but still present. Voices continued to mumble but the ringing in my ears was barely easing up. I felt that same warmth on my left palm and a warmth on my right shoulder. I heard a voice, louder and closer this time, so much so I almost made out what it said. The voice was accompanied by a squeezing sensation of my left hand. I wanted to speak, I wanted to clear my throat from the sick taste of copper, I wanted to open my eyes but I couldn’t, and I wanted that goddamn ringing to stop. I felt a pressure in my head for a moment, and then that film reel of my life kicked on again.

I was sitting in a bar enjoying a beer and good conversation with two younger soldiers. Laughs were had, our thirst was quenched, and we loaded into the topless army issued jeep to head back to the rest of the company. I was driving, sharing the funny bits of my war story with the new guys, giving them the pleasure of knowing the one and only Wild Bill and his take-no-shit attitude. In front of us there were bright lights pointed head on. I squinted, told the newbies to stay in the jeep, and got out to help the soldier seemingly stranded on the roadside. That was at least what I assumed as the lights continued to blind me from the scene sprawled out at my feet. Once I could see clearly, figures lay on the ground, though I couldn’t make out their faces nor their clothing nor their bodies. They were blurs in my mind, censored blurs of flesh and grey coloring. My head moved in slow-motion between the two figures on the ground, my vision began to double as I looked up at the soldier in front of me, who was now just as blurred as the figures laying below. Just as my eyes set on his shape, the soldier raised his arm and pointed at my face. I couldn’t quite understand until I saw the black object in his hand. I made sense of what I was staring at even if my eyes couldn’t see. I heard a pop.

I could feel the rush of my blood throughout my limbs. Suddenly I was 17 again. I was not scared of death.

[wyrcan]

HELLO WYR!!! I HOPE YOU'RE DOING WELL <33 FOR YOUR WUESTION GAME I'D LOVE TO ASK QUESTION 9 AND 29 IF THAT'S OK!! <3

HI NESS!! IM DOING GOOD I HOPE YOU’RE WELL TOO!! <33 ITS TOTALLY OKAY!

what do you consider your biggest accomplishment?

mmmh probably getting my bachelors degree at 18!! i started college young and finished fairly young, i ended up celebrating it a semester after getting my hs diploma! (although jobs don’t seem to like it :/)

favorite song lyrics right now?

oooomg i love talking about lyrics!! but ‘the view between villages’ by noah kahan is my favorite and this is my favorite verse: feel the rush of my blood, i’m 17 again  i am not scared of death, i’ve got dreams again  it’s just me and the curve of the valley  and there is meanin' on earth, i am happy i just love it and am listening to it on repeat!! and the way he sings it >>> like it’s just so lethargic to listen to and scream in the car

[hawkzeyes]

“For a minute, the world seemed so simple. Feel the rush of my blood, I’m 17 again. I am not scared of death, I’ve got dreams again.”

Hawkeye: Blindspot (2011)

[northernattude]

‘feel the rush of my blood, i’m 17 again. i am not scared of death, i’ve got dreams again’

ABOUT:

Full Name: Elizabeth Moira Shepherd Nickname(s): Liz, Lizzie, Lizbee, Bumble Bee (only used by her dad), EMS. Age: 47 Birthday: May 23rd Species: Human   Nationality: American   Gender: Female Sexual Orientation: Bisexual Religion: N/A Occupation: OB/GYN at SGMW Fandom: Grey’s Anatomy Face Claim: Neve Campbell

RELATIONSHIPS:

Parents: Christopher and Carolyn Shepherd Siblings: Derek, Kathleen, Nancy and Amelia Birth Order: Third oldest Other Family: Addison Forbes-Montgomery (ex sister in law), Meredith Grey (sister in law), Zola Shepherd (niece), Derek Bailey Shepherd (nephew), Ellis Shepherd (niece), Christopher Shepherd (nephew), Scout Shepherd-Lincoln (nephew) Significant Other(s): Benjamin Adams (divorced) Children: Lucas Adams, Lorraine Adams (22), Andrea Adams (18), Dominick Adams (14), Corrine Adams (10), Marianne Adams (7)

PHYSICAL TRAITS:

Eye Color(s): Brown Hair Color: Brown Body Build: Average Notable Physical Traits: Eyes, cheekbones Phobia(s): knives, guns, losing people. Mental Disease(s): depression When and how was this diagnosed?: Diagnosed when she was 15 because her mom he her see a therapist after her grades dropped. How was it overcome?: Medication and therapy. Physical Disease(s): None   When was this diagnosed and/or how did it happen?: N/A

BIOGRAPHY:

[bloomblitz]

Dracula Daily September 17

Five pieces of correspondence today While then under the cut it goes

Four days and nights of peace. I am getting so strong again that I hardly know myself. While I’m happy I feel this is just a ‘things get better before they reallllly get worse’ type of situation.

the flapping against the windows, the distant voices which seemed so close to me, the harsh sounds that came from I know not where and commanded me to do I know not what Wait so Drac really did the ‘come to me, my child?’ hypnotic talking? Was it psychic or did Helsing keep hearing Drac at Lucy’s window?

although the boughs or bats or something napped almost angrily against the window-panes. Drac its been days, man! Go find some other victim.

Suddenly the door was burst open, and in rushed my patient, with his face distorted with passion. I’m assuming its Renfield, but what the actual F?!

I was thunderstruck, for such a thing as a patient getting of his own accord into the Superintendent's study is almost unknown. Almost? This has happened before?

Without an instant's pause he made straight at me. He had a dinner-knife in his hand, and, as I saw he was dangerous, I tried to keep the table between us. Oh my god he’s gonna eat the Dr.

Before he could strike again, however, I got in my right and he was sprawling on his back on the floor. Man Seward has a mean right!

He was lying on his belly on the floor licking up, like a dog, the blood which had fallen from my wounded wrist. So...is he just trying to be a vampire? There’s no plausible way Renfield would know this but now both he and Drac have sipped Seward’s blood. Yet it seems odd that Renfield would only go after the Dr. for his blood, and not any other of the attendants. It couldn’t have been easy getting all the way to Seward’s study.

(Sent to Carfax, Sussex, as no county given; delivered late by twenty-two hours.) 17 September.—Do not fail to be at Hillingham to-night. So if it was delivered almost a day late does this mean that he missed the appointment?

Memorandum left by Lucy Westenra. M E M O R A N D U M holy f. Seward missed the telegram, therefore had no reason to check on Lucy. This is gonna be one of those ‘nobody’s truly at fault or everyone’s partially at fault,’ as its just a bunch of bad luck on everyone’s part

I feel I am dying of weakness, and have barely strength to write, but it must be done if I die in the doing. poor Lucy!

I went to bed as usual, taking care that the flowers were placed as Dr. Van Helsing directed, and soon fell asleep. Ok, no troubles there

I did wish that Dr. Seward was in the next room—as Dr. Van Helsing said he would be—so that I might have called him. Just in case people are confused, here’s what’s happened: Helsing went back to Amsterdam briefly. He telegraphed Seward to have the Dr. stay at Lucy’s this night. The telegraph was delivered late because no county was listed Seward, not receiving the telegraph, would not know that Helsing was away and that he needed to be at Lucy’s.

there was a crash at the window, and a lot of broken glass was hurled on the floor. HOLY SHIT. So much for needing an invite. If Drac wants your blood he’s gonna just let himself in!

she clutched the wreath of flowers that Dr. Van Helsing insisted on my wearing round my neck, and tore it away from me. For a second or two she sat up, pointing at the wolf, and there was a strange and horrible gurgling in her throat; then she fell over—as if struck with lightning oh man. I’m so sorry Lucy.

a whole myriad of little specks seemed to come blowing in through the broken window, and wheeling and circling round like the pillar of dust that travellers describe when there is a simoon in the desert. Another scene which I hope Hollywood did right

They were all so frightened and nervous that I directed them to go to the dining-room and have each a glass of wine. Damn Lucy is hardcore. A giant wolf broke into her room just a few hours prior and literally scared her mother to death. The maids come in and start panicking and Lucy’s just like ‘oh pishposh. Settle down. Have a glass or 2 why don’t you?

  It smelt of laudanum, and looking on the sideboard, I found that the bottle which mother's doctor uses for her—oh! did use—was empty. Did...did the maids all just accidentally poison themselves? Did Drac poison them? Did someone mix up the bottles beforehand?

My dear mother gone! It is time that I go too. Good-bye, dear Arthur, if I should not survive this night. God keep you, dear, and God help me! I want her to be ok but Drac is still there. What are you playing at anyway? If you were gonna drain her dry why mess with the maids at all?...unless you were planning to drain the whole household?????

Letter, Mina Harker to Lucy Westenra. (Unopened by her.) SHIT. She’s dead, isn’t she?

as an add-on, Mina’s letter was sweet, Glad she’s doing well but in the wake of this tragedy its just bittersweet.

[justcallmenikki7]

BTS Reaction To: You Getting Shot

Mafia!Au

Summary: you get shot and the boys handle the situation differently than expected.

Request: Anonymous said:

Mafia bts reaction to their s/o accidently or on purpose getting shot?

Warnings: angsttt, mafia!au, mentions of being shot. Taehyung is a dick in this im sorry, mentions of the boys wanting to murder the person who shot you, fluff, yoongi bloodlust,

W.C.: 2-300 for each member (1.7k)

Notes: Friday I am getting my puppy!!!!

Jin:

“Oh fuck.” Seokjin sighed as he watched you play with the guns that he has laid out on the table in the weapon room.

“What?” You laughed, confused on why your boyfriend is acting as if you are about to hurt yourself or someone. “I know what I am doing.”

Seokjin let out a nervous laugh at your words, cautiously walking up to you. The most feared mafia leader in the world is nervous of his own fiancée that is holding a gun for the first time. Not knowing what a certain switch does, you flicked it, and not knowing that the switch turns off the safety, you pulled back the trigger and a loud, ricocheting sound sounded in the room followed by a loud cry of pain coming from you.

Realizing what just has happened, Seokjin let out a loud curse, rushing towards.

“Oh, fuck!” You screeched, holding onto your thigh, trying to not pass out from the blood that is now covering your hands.

“You’re such an idiot, Jagi!” Seokjin scolded, picking you up bridal style, carrying you out of the room in a hurry to the headquarters doctors’ room.

“Did Noona just shoot herself?” Jungkook asked as Seokjin jogged passed him.

“Possibly,” you answered, doing the best as you could to not break down crying.

Yoongi:

Yoongi was already having a bad day. Having to deal with the new rookies he brought in, getting threats from a gang in the east, and having little to none sleep. It was as if he was ticking time bomb ready to explode at any second.

The last thing he needed was getting a call from the hospital, saying that you were a victim of a crossfire shooting.

So, here he was, sitting in the most uncomfortable chair in the room where you were attached to tubes and wires, the agonizingly beat from the heart monitor mocking him. Tears were streaking down his face, face red and expression heartbroken.

“Hyung,” Namjoon spoke out, knocking on the door softly.

Looking up, Yoongi gave him a death glare, not in the mood to deal with anything. “What do you want, Namjoon?” Yoongi growled out, voice croaky.

“The gang from the east, the one who has been making threats… they’re the ones who shot Y/N.”

To say that Namjoon was scared would be an understatement – from all of the years of knowing Yoongi, Namjoon has never seen the look that Yoongi is showing, which is bloodlust.

Hoseok:

“You’re so stupid!” Hoseok growled out at you, an angry look on his face. “You’re so Goddamn stupid! Why would you do that?” He clutched you closer to him, right hand adding pressure to your shoulder where you got shot at.

A laugh escaped your lips, which earned a glare from Hoseok. “What? You’d think I’d let you get shot by a crazy psychopath named Richie?” wincing at the pain that came from your shoulder, the action did not go unnoticed by your husband who then lessen the pressure he has on the wound.

“Yes! I am supposed to be the one who protects you, not the other way around.”

“You’re such a child,” you grumbled, shaking your head disappointedly.

“How am I the child?”

“Because you’re acting like one, Hope. In this relationship, we protect each other, no matter the consequences.”

“You could have gotten killed!”

“Yeah, and? I’d do it again just to make sure you are safe, because I love you dammit.”

Pulling you up closer to him, Hoseok pressed a kiss to your forehead, eyes closed to keep the tears from falling. Pulling away, he rested his chin on the top of your head, keeping you close to him as possible, body crouched over you in a protective manner. “I love you too, idiot.”

Namjoon:

To say Namjoon was not surprised by the phone call that he got from the maknae would be an understatement. Namjoon knew that once you got into the car with Jungkook, Jimin and Taehyung to go to the gun range to practice on your aim, he knew something bad would come out of it – and being right all the time can be exhausting.

“What do you mean she shot herself in the leg?” Namjoon sighed into the phone, pinching his nose from irritation.

“I don’t know, Hyung! We only had our backs turned for five seconds, and then we heard a bang! and next thing we know, Noona was crying and there was blood!”

“You allowed Y/N to hold a gun without any supervision?! You know how clumsy she is! She is worse than me, Jungkook!”

“That is factual, Hyung. But this isn’t our fault!”

“How is this not your fault? You were the ones with her! And my stupid ass allowed her to go with you three.”

“Can you please stop yelling? You’re stressing me out and I am the one driving!”

“You’re the one driving?!”

The sound of the call being disconnected told Namjoon everything.

“I’m going to kill all four of them.” Namjoon swore as he grabbed his coat and keys so he can meet you four at the hospital. “They’re so dead.”

Jimin:

You woke up to the sound of your boyfriend moving around the bedroom, failing at trying to be quiet for your sake. Sitting up, groaning at the pain the shot up your lower body, your movements caught your boyfriends’ attention.

“Jagia, why are up?” Jimin asked concern, sitting down beside you on the bed.

“Because I heard you, why are you up at 3:17 a.m.?” You asked, doing a one over on him. Jimin was wearing all black, his gun tucked into his pants and knife tucked into its holster on his calf. It was now silent confirmation that Jimin was going to kill the gunman who shot you at the drug store just a few days ago. “You’re going to kill him…” you trailed off.

“I am, he deserves it. He shot you, he deserves the consequences.” Jimin spoke harshly, the whole incident making him angrier by the second.

“Why can’t you let the cops handle it? they’ve already tracked him down, you don’t need to do anything else.”

Sighing, Jimin ran his hands over his face. Taking your hand into his, he brought your hand up to his face, pressing a kiss to the back of your hand. “I know you don’t want me too, but I am still going to do it. I do not agree with our justice system, and I believe that they’ll let him walk and he’ll do it again. This will give me a sense of peace and knowing that he is gone will give me some sort of justice.”

Knowing that you cannot do anything else, and Jimin with his mind already set, it is a losing battle for you. Nodding your head reluctantly, you squeezed his hand. “I love you, be safe okay? Don’t be back too late, Jiminie.”

“I love you too, Jagi.”

Taehyung:

Ever since you got shot, your boyfriend Taehyung has been distant from you. His actions have been bringing you more pain than the actual wound you got. Instead of taking care of you, the maids that he has have been the ones taking care of you. What makes you feel even more shitty is that he has not even came to check up on you once, and it has been a week since your accident.

Deciding that enough is enough when he decided to ignore your fifth call of the day, you ignored the protests from the maids and got up. Realizing that they cannot stop you, they decided to help you get dressed into a pair of sweats and a hoodie and shoes. Helping you down the stairs, Jungkook carried you out to the car, listening to your demands about taking you to the headquarters where Taehyung is at. Once you got to the headquarters, Jungkook helped you to your boyfriend’s office, giving you an encouraging smile before you knocked on the double doors. Hearing footsteps come your way; you began to feel nervous about the meeting with your boyfriend. When Taehyung opened the door, he held an irritated look.

“What are you doing out of bed? You shouldn’t be moving, doctors’ orders.” Your boyfriend scolded you, making you feel smaller than him.

“I wanted to see you,” you stated strongly.

“I’m busy right now, have Jungkook take you home.”

“Why are you acting like this?” You asked irritated, feeling hurt by your boyfriends’ words. “You haven’t even seen me this whole time, not once checking up on me. Do you not care?” Your voice shook at the end, tears welling up in your eyes.

“Please, Y/N, go home and stay in bed. It is not good for you to be out and about. I’ll see you when I get home.” And at that, he closed the door, leaving you all alone once again.

Jungkook:

“Jungkook, I don’t need all of these blankets.” You explained to your boyfriend who is wrapping you up in five blankets.

“Yes, you do. Doctor said that you need to be on bed rest for two weeks due to your wound, so I am going to make sure you are comfortable because you will be here for a while.” Jungkook spoke out, ignoring your words.

“I will be just fine in our bed where there is a TV and comfy bed. I don’t want to be on the couch for the next 14 days. I want to be in our bed.”

Looking up at you, bewildered at your statement, he stomped his foot like a child. “Why didn’t you just say that fifteen minutes ago?” He shouted exasperatedly; hands thrown up in the air.

“Well, if you would’ve just listened to me the first time, we wouldn’t be in this situation.”

“I thought I was being a good boyfriend, but now it looks like I’ve failed once again.”

“Stop being a baby and take me up to our room so we can cuddle before you go and hunt down that man who shot me, okay? Please?”

Not needing to say anymore, Jungkook picked you up bridal style, running down the hall like a mad man, excited at the thought of cuddles.

[palettes-and-prompts]

100 Whump Dialogue Prompts

1) "No one is coming to help you." 2) "Your screams are music to my ears." 3) "Keep your eyes open, I really want you to watch what I'm about to do to your little friend here." 4) "Does it kill you? Knowing that you can't do anything to stop me?" 5) "Don't worry, I'm not going to kill you just yet." 6) "You were always too soft, never could stand up for yourself." 7) "Where's your hero now when you need them the most? I don't see them." 8) "Do you really think they could ever love you?" 9) "Look at you now, you're pathetic. You're weak." 10) "I don't want to rush this, I've been waiting a long time for this moment so I want to be able to take my time with you." 11) "But they told me they loved me." "Aww, sweetheart, they were lying, I'm the only one who could ever love you." 12) "I never wanted to hurt people! I didn't want this life! You made me a monster." 13) "I didn't make you a monster, you were just born that way." 14) "Hope you're not too attached to that hand." 15) "You killed them, you bury them." 16) "You made me hurt them." "I didn't make you do anything you didn't want to do." 17) "Do as you're told or you're going to make me angry." 18) "Don't ever say that name in front of me again, do you understand?" 19) "I only do these things because I love you, you know that right? I don't want to hurt you, but you just make me so angry sometimes." 20) "Don't take me back there! Please, I can't go back there. They're there." 21) "If I tell you what they made me do you wont be able to look at me the same." 22) "Let them go. I did everything you asked me to do, now just let them go!" 23) "You're a talker, I never liked talkers. Let's see how much talking you can do with your tongue cut out." 24) "You never listen, but that's okay because after I finish carving up your little friend over here I think you're going to be able to hear me just fine. 25) "I've never smashed anyone's hand with a hammer before so this is going to be a first for both of us." 26) "What happened to you? What did they say to you?" "Please don't make me tell you." 27) "I can't sleep, every time I close my eyes I see them." 28) "They were right, I'm weak and I couldn't save them." 29) "Let them go and you can have me. Let them go and I'll never try to leave again. I promise." 30) "No, they were my friend. I should be the one to kill them." 31) "No, go on, say it. Say that you wish I'd died instead of them, I know you want to!" 32) "Why do you stay with them? You don't deserve to be treated like this, no one does." 33) "The only thing you've ever been good at is being a coward!" 34) "You don't belong here, you never did." 35) "You're a waste of air." 36) "You're useless." 37) "They hurt you, why do you go back?" "They're the only family I've got." 38) "You don't have friends, we're the only ones who are able to tolerate you. 39) "I've felt pain all my life, but now? I don't feel anything." "Good, then you're ready." 40) "I wish they would have let you die that day." 41) "You always were too emotional." 42) "What do hugs feel like?" 43) "Why does everything hurt?" 44) "Why doesn't anyone want me? 45) "Families are supposed to love you, not leave you." "Then I guess I've never had a family." 46) "Do you think I'll ever have a family one day?" 47) "How long do you think they can hold their breath underwater before they need to breathe?" 48) "Hey! Hey, wake up! How many of these did you take, huh? No, no, don't go back to sleep, you need to stay awake for me." 49) "Are you afraid of me too?" 50) "Why didn't you tell us you'd been hit? You almost died." 51) "Prove your loyalty. Kill them." "They're just a kid." 52) "Am I going to die here?" "No, okay? Just stay with me." 53) "Your efforts to be the good guy have been so cute but it's time to face reality. You were born to be bad, you'll never be the hero. 54) "I'm fine." "No you're not, you're losing a lot of blood." 55) "Save the others first. Save them first or all my fighting was for nothing." 56) "You see these scars? You did this to me." 57) "Do you think they knew I loved them before they died?" 58) "Could you ever forgive me?" 59) "I can't give up. They need me so I can never give up." 60) "You couldn't save your first love, what makes you think you can save your second?" 61) "It's okay if you're scared of dying, your friends were too." 62) "Whatever you want, anything you want, I'll give it to you. Just make it stop." 63) "They say I'm a monster and I never believed them but now I think they're right." 64) "I failed my mission, I couldn't save them. Their deaths are on me." 65) "I can't eat, I can't sleep, I can barely fucking breathe because they're gone and it's my fault. And god knows what they're doing to them right now and I'm just sitting here doing nothing!" 66) "Calm down, calm down, you were just dreaming." 67) "Take me instead, please?" "What would I want with someone as pathetic as you?" 68) "If you have to kill one of us kill me." 69) "I ruined your brilliant plan, I destroyed everything you built, I killed your friends, and now you've got one bullet left and two people in front of you. So, shoot me because if you shoot them and let me live I'm going tear you apart piece by piece. So, what's it going to be?" 70) "I know you've been out for a long time need you to do a job for me." "I'm not killing again." "Not even if the person I'm asking you to kill is responsible for all of your pain?" 71) "It'd be a shame if someone you loved got hurt, I know how much your friends mean to you." 72) "I hate myself when I'm with you." 73) "I wish you didn't have to be medicated to call me." 74) "This is all your fault. I wish you'd died in that car crash instead of them." 75) "I need to get up. They're dying so I need to get up right now." 76) "Just make it all stop, please, it hurts. Everything hurts." 77) "We can't be together. You know that. You and I bring out the worst in each other." 78) "Be a shame if you kept talking and I had to take out a few of those teeth to shut you up. Especially since you've got such a lovely smile." 79)  "Look at that, your hero came for you after all. They really do love you, huh? It's a shame you wont get the reunion you wanted." 80) "I know living with me hasn't been easy but I really am trying here." 81) "You put on such a brave face but the truth is you're terrified of what's out there." 82) "You think you're ready to do everything but you're not. You're not ready to kill someone, no matter how much you hate them." 83) "Everybody keeps telling me what to do, what to say, what to think, what to feel and I can't do this anymore, I can't. I feel like I'm not even a person anymore and I just need it to stop. I just want everything to stop! 84) "I'm just trying to keep you from dying! Don't you see that? I care about you and you are the last person I ever want to see dead out there, so just fucking listen to me for once!" 85) "I just want to keep you safe, there are a lot of bad people out there who want to hurt people like us. We have to be careful." 86) "Goddamn it, kid, don't you ever listen? Stay still, let me stop the bleeding, okay?" 87) "You are not one of us, okay? You're just some rando who got dragged into all this shit. So take this money, get a bus ticket, and go home, kid." 88) "What have I become?" 89) "Why hasn't anyone looked for me yet?" "Because they don't care about you like I do." 90) "I'm not a kid anymore so stop treating me like I am!" 91) "They left you all alone. Stay here with me and I'll never leave you. I can be your family and we can watch them all burn together." 92) "Why did you jump in front of me back there?" "Why didn't you move?" 93) "I never thought I'd see you again, they told me you were dead." 94) "Get under the bed and don't make a sound okay?" "But they'll get you." "Just get under the bed and no matter what you hear or what you see just stay completely quiet and completely still. Do that for me, alright?" 95) "Shh, it's just me, don't panic." "Don't sneak up on me like that." 96) "I feel so useless." 97) "You call out for them when you sleep. Do you want to talk about it?" 98) "My eyelids feel like they weigh a million pounds." "It's because you're tired, you should get some sleep. We have to save the world tomorrow." 99) "Hey! Hey, calm down. Calm down, it's just me." 100) "When I finish patching you up I swear to god I'm gonna kick your ass for making me worry about you."

[the-daily-multi-fandom-post]

Hey can you do Elijah mikaelson x reader where she is a demigod daughter of Zeus and she has similar armor like wonder women and she fight like her. The reader or older then Elijah and the mikaelson and one day the fall Inlove but the family espically Hayley don’t Iike her so they always look at her or say negative things about her not knowing she can hear them. And one day the mikaelson gets in trouble and she save them like in the scene in no mans land in wonder women and their awe of her.

Oh my gods yes!!!

I need more post like this! But I’m glad to be the one writing it! ❤️🖤❤️🖤

The originals: the daughter of Zeus.

Warnings: Death, kinda gore I guess, I don't think there is any cussing for the first time in forever!  cussing. pairing: Elijah Mikaelson x reader word count: 3, 2231 That's a lot of words I think.

"Who is Y/n L/n?" Rebekah asked as she looked at her brother Elijahs phone. "Why are you so nosey?" He asked as he pulled the phone to his chest hiding the screen from his younger sister. "Doesn't matter who is she? Is it someone I need to kill?" "You know who she is."  Elijah looked at his sister with murderous eyes. "If you dare lay a hand on her." He threatened. "Oh you mean this girl?" Klaus asked as he held Y/n up by her neck. "Help- me." You choked out. Elijah looked at his brother with frighten eyes. "Let her go." Elijah told Klaus with a dangerously calm voice. Klaus smirked, and Elijah knew he shouldn't have said that. "Okay." Klaus let go while snaping your neck. Elijah cried out as he jumped up in bed.

"It was just a dream." HE whispers, looking over at the lock on his nightstand flickered a 4:15 am. He sat up against the headboard, trying to calm his racing heart.

Y/n was the woman he had met years ago in (Your home town). She was absolutely flawless. Beautiful Y/s/t skin, amazing bright Y/e/c eyes, long/short y/h/c hair. She was amazingly beautiful. He had recently ran into her in Jackson square a month ago. Since then the two started talking again. *a Few hours later*

Y/n was walking down the french quarter enjoying her day when she heard someone scream. Looking around she seen it was just someone playing. She was always on guard, it was just a bad habit of hers to pay attention to her surroundings. And not like a normal person would pay attention to their surroundings but someone who is paranoid times a hundred. It comes with living for a very long time.

Y/n walked into Rousseau's. Y/n smiled, greeting the blonde perky Barmaid. "What can i get for you?"  She asked with a smile.

"Camille, That's  French isn't? Means Perfect?" Camille smiled and nodded. "You dont look famillar are you knew to town?" camille asked politely. "No, I've been here before. It's just been a very long time since, I've been here." Y/n spoke with a smile on her face. "I'll get a margarita, on the rocks,  please?" Y/n asked nicely, Camille nodded as she spoke, "Alright, I'll get right to it."  Y/n smiled as she waited for her drink to be made.

"Y/n, how are you doing?" Elijah asks as he sits down beside her on the empty bar stool. As she was about to answer Cami came back with Y/ns margarita. "Elijah, you know her?" Elijah nodded. "Yes, I've known her for quite some time." you could hear and see the smile  in his voice.  "Yes, quite a while hasn't it?" Y/n asked with a flirtatious smile.

"Wait is she?" Cami questioned knowingly. Elijah nodded and Y/n quietly giggle. Elijah still didn't know what Y/n truly was. . "Oh.." Cami looked at Y/n curious. "Can I have a bourbon, please?" Elijah asked as an awkward silence filled the air. "Sure, I'll be back."

"So, how are you?" Elijah asked politely, looking at you with his charming smile. Y/n smiled right as she took a sip of her margarita. "Quite well. When a little birdy told me you and your family was back in New Orleans, I couldn't help myself and come visit. It feels like it has been centuries since I have seen you last." Y/n joked, making Elijah chuckle a laugh. "It does seem to be centuries." Elijah continued the joke.

The two continued to talk, just enjoy the comfort of an old "Friend". Elijah updated her on the family even though she knew the met  family didn't like her Elijah had told her about them. So she would politely ask about them, not wanting to be rude. But Elijah always enjoyed talking about his family, but the family didn't like Y/n.

*Home town. 1765*

The L/n were one of the founding families of (Your home town/ or a town of your choice). Y/n was the daughter of Y/f/n and y/m/n. The L/n family were holding a ball for the town. Just to celebrate Y/ns birthday.

Y/n was wearing a light blue ball gown dress. It fit her perfectly showing off all the right things, but in a appropriate way. Your father would die to see how people dressed these days. Her Y/h/c hair was pulled out of her face put into Victorian kinda hair style. She had ruby red lip stick on and she just looked perfect (As always queen ;)

Y/n walked down the stairs, politely greeting the town folk who wished her a happy birthday. She slowly made her way through the crowd, politely reject the boys who asked her to dance. She wasn't a girl who loved big parties, nor the attention she got at the parties. She enjoyed small family get togethers. But ever since they founded the town the L/n family would have  extravagant parties for the entire town.

"My I ask the birthday girl for a dance?" Y/n turned around where the mysterious voice was coming from. Y/n smiled shyly just as she was going to say 'no' the man flashed a breath taking smile. "I guess one can't hurt." She responded with a nod. Elijah smiled as he took her hand walking out to the middle of the dance floor.

"You don't seem to be enjoy your birthday celebration, Lady Y/n." Y/n sighed as she nodded. "Well, it's not that I don't enjoy them. I just feel like after a certain age in life there's no reason to celebrate." Elijah chuckled as he looked at her a bit perplexed. "You're only celebrating your 17 birthday. I don't see how that is a very old age." Elijah said as he spun her around. Y/n nodded as she came back to stand in front of him. "Yes, but to me it does seem like it has been many life times."

Y/n and Elijah had a grand time that night. The two dance, talking about their lives while dancing. When they stopped dancing Elijah introduced Y/n to his siblings. Y/n enjoyed meeting them, though Klaus, Elijah's brother seemed quite skeptical of her. Rebekah began calling Y/n her sister, and Kol well he was Kol, very much a flirt.

Days after the party The mikealson's stayed in town. They were staying as a guest in the L/n family mansion. Y/n's father insisted on them staying. Y/n seemed confused when her father had announced they were staying, but she didn't pay any mind to it.

Y/n had grown use to seeing the mikealson's in her house. She loved when she and Elijah would take a lovely stroll in the garden. The two would talk just about anything, other then about who they really are.

Y/n walking into her house a hand basket full of sweet smelling flowers inside the basket. She laid the basket on the kitchen table. Smiling and humming as she grabbed a clear glass vase, but as she turned around she gasped dropping the vase.  Elijah had appeared out of no where.

"I apologize. I did not intend to spook you." He apologized as he rushed towards her trying to help her pick up the pieces of glass.

"It-t's okay." she stuttered out as she picked up the shards of glass. "Your cut." Elijah says pointing to the dripping blood on her hand. "Oh no, I'm fine. It's just a scratch." She made up as she grabbed a cloth from the counter. Ridding the blood with the cloth she showed him nothing was there, just a tiny scratch. "That's a lot of blood to just be a scratch." He spoke looking thinking maybe she was like him, maybe she was vampire as well.

"Elijah, come on." Rebekah called as she walked into the kitchen. "What's going on?" Y/n asked the blonde. "We're leaving. Did Elijah not tell you?" Rebekah spoke looking between the two. "I was about to, but I scared her making her drop a vase. I was just helping her pick it up." Elijah said as he put the glass in a bowl Y/n had put the glass in.  "Oh, well. I would say your goodbyes quick. Niklaus wants to leave as soon as possible." She said quickly. She gave Y/n a quick hug goodbye, then left the two.

"Well, I guess this is goodbye." She spoke as she walked Elijah to the front door. "Yes, I suppose it is. I do wish to see you again. Maybe, well see each other again in the future." Y/n smiled as she looked at him. Reaching up to him she kissed his cheek. "Its a promise."

Since it was near night time the Mikaelson family decided they were going to stay the night in an empty house in town. Not too far from the L/n mansion. Elijah pasted the living room, upset with his brother about leaving so early. "I don't know what you want me to say, brother. She is just not good for you! There's something about her. It's just not human!" Klaus bellowed towards his brother. "Why do you say that?! Because you think she is taking me away from you?! Because I finally care about someone who isn't family?" Elijah questioned his brother. Klaus rolled his eyes as he took a swig of his whiskey. Elijah huffed as he walked away from his brother. Going to his room for the night. Not feeling the need to talk to him. He was too angry to talk.

"If you feel like she is taking him from us then why don't you do something about it?" Kol spoke looking at his older brother. "What do you suggest I do? Just go up to her house, and murder her?" Klaus asked looking at his brother with a cold look. "It hasn't stopped you before with Rebekah's passed lovers." Kol pointed out as he nodded his head towards Rebekah. Klaus nodded.

Then later on that night as everyone was sleeping Klaus left the house. Quietly, hidden in the darkness of the night, he made his way to the L/n mansion. He quietly made his way up the stairs to Y/n's bed room. She was sound asleep, no lights on in her room, accept for the moon light leaking in from her open window. Klaus quietly walked over to her bed. Grabbing a dagger he had in held it up. He looked at her, she was  utterly exquisite. The way her hair shined in the moon light. "I'm so sorry, love." Just as he brought the knife down to her chest she opened her eyes. Her Y/e/c eyes staring into his blue ones. The dagger went into her chest and she gasped. "W-wh-at a-are yo-ou doi-ng?" She stuttered as blood began to come up. "I can't let you take my brother from me." He whispered, almost as if he was ashamed in what he had just done. She nodded as she looked up at him. "It's okay." She barely got out without stuttering. "I'mm.. I.. not.." Then she stops breathing.

Klaus sighed and tried to stop overthinking. "You did this to keep your family together. She was going to take Elijah away from the Family." He told himself over and over again all the way home.

The next morning they left before anyone could've expected it was them. That was the last time Klaus had seen Y/n. That's when he believed she "Died." But one thing still kept him up at night. What was she saying at the end. She was trying to choke out something but couldn't.

** back to present day.*

"Yes, I do believe that my lovely brother Niklaus tried to kill you." Elijah spoke in a lower voice. "Yes, well he didn't know what I was capable of." Elijah nodded and smiled, just enjoying the company of a "Friend", (The two were secretly together, but didn't want anyone to know. Aka his siblings *Cough Klaus *cough). Hours later the two had to go separate ways. Y/n had business to handle and Elijah had to go home since Klaus called saying he needed his help; which was never a good thing.

"I'll call you tonight?" Elijah asked as he looked down at the shorter woman. She nodded as she kissed his cheek. "Yes." She nodded and with that the two went their ways.

The night continued and Y/n had finished all she had to do for her work. She got an unpleasant text message from Hayley telling her that she was not to talk to Elijah ever again or a lot of bad things were going to happen to Y/n. Then Hayley called Y/n to make sure she would know that she was never going to be with Elijah. (Jokes on her, right?)

She still hadn't gotten a call from Elijah which made her worry. So she gave it an hour before she did anything. By midnight she was out of her house finding going to the Mikaelson plantation  in hopes that Elijah had just forgotten to call or was just a little busy with Klaus.

She quickly arrived at the Mikaelson plantation, it was a complete mess. Glass all over the floor, furniture broken. Something bad happened there. She tried to listen for any sounds in the house, but couldn't hear anything besides a very distant scream.

Running towards the sound she found herself going towards the bayou. It was dark, clouds hiding the once bright moon light. Luckily she found herself able to see. She heard the scream, but this time it was a lot closer.

Y/n quietly, but quickly ran towards the noise. She could see the Mikaelson family surrounded by three giant groups. She could only assume the groups were witches, werewolves, and vampires.

None of the Mikaelson family noticed Y/n lurking in the darkness. She was kind of good at not being noticed, how do you thinks she has lived for thousands upon thousands of years.

Y/n quickly grabbed a hold of a red haired witch breaking her neck then going to three more and doing the same, all while going unnoticed.

Some turned their heads a the sound of a thump, but didn't really know what happened. She smiled as she seen a vampire meet her eyes. She ran towards it as it announced to the others she was there. She like a challenge and there was at least a hundred creatures there in front of.

First three vampires came at her and she smirked. Pulling the hearts out of the first two and taking the heel of her shoe and kicking the third one down to the ground. The two vampires dropped to the ground dead. She took a dead branch from off the ground staking the vampire that lied on the ground.

"This is fun." She spoke with a smirk plastered on her face. Clapping her hands together a giant sound wave came through, throwing them back. Some of the vampires dying from being staked by the branches. Some of the witches were thrown against the trees breaking their necks. Y/n grabbed a stick that had just so happened to be laying beside her. She threw it and it went through two of the witches. Y/n felt an arm wrap around her as someone flung her over their shoulders and slammed her onto the ground. It she was human her spine would've been shattered. She took her leg and kicked the werewolf's knee completely breaking it. She stood up, her hand went through his chest to his heart. "Shouldn't have done that." She spoke with a dangerous glare then ripped his heart out.

She heard the witches begin chanting and she rolled her y/e/c eyes. "Wish that worked on me, but it doesn't."  She said she she rubbed her hands together sparks flying every which way from her hands. "Light 'em up." She thought to herself. Strikes of lighting came out of her hands frying the witches that were left. All that was left was a handful of vamps and werewolves.

"Now, you can either leave alive or you will die." She offered to the two groups. The two groups looked at each other and then back to Y/n. Nobody left so Y/n nodded. "Playing hard to get. Love it." She spoke sarcastically. A blue flamed fire started around the two groups. "My uncle is Hades. And he has taught me a lot. One of those things is how he loves visitors. So when Y'all see him in the underworld, tell him I said hello. The flame ingulfed them quickly killing each of them. After Y/n knew they were dead she put the fire out.

Running over towards Elijah and his siblings she asked, "Are you guys okay?" Completely worried about them. Yet not even out of breath after she had just kill one hundred supernatural creatures. "How in the bloody hell are you still alive?" Klaus whispered as he looked at Y/n.

"I'm not an average person." Y/n answered as she untied the vervain/wolfsbane rope.

"Obviously. How did you do all of that?" Rebekah asked. Y/n was going to answer when the rest of them started asking questions, except for Elijah. He didn't know what she was, but he knew she wasn't a vampire. He thought she was, but now? Now he wasn't sure.

Later that night Y/n and the Mikaelson siblings went back to the Mikaelson plantation house. The Mikaelson siblings got showers getting the blood off of them. Then after they were done they all met up in the living room waiting for an explanation from Y/n.

"I've been alive much longer then the rest of you. I've been alive since the beginning. My father is the god Zeus. He's the god of sky and thunder and the king of all the other gods and goddesses. I've got the powers of pretty much all the gods. I've been taught how to control my powers and sometimes even share them. I don't so Kol don't get any ideas." She told Kol as soon as she seen his face light up.

"Why didn't you tell anyone?" Elijah asked as he took her hands in his.  "Well, because the same reason y'all don't tell people you guys are who you are. I have a great many of enemies. If I go around saying, 'hey, I'm Y/n the demi god, daughter of Zeus, people would think I'm nuts. And my enemies could easily find me." She explained.

"I'm sorry, for all the horrible things I’ve said about you and said to you." Hayley said as she looked at Y/n sincerely.  Hayley was upstairs taking care of Hope. (She had just came back from a friends house out of town).

"I mean we were all terrible to you. And you saved us." Rebekah said looking at Y/n with a look that showed she was truly sorry. "It's okay, I understand where you guys were coming from

. Nothing gets in the way of family." She says with a smile. And then they just sit around in the living room asking her all about the gods and what they're really like. If Percy Jackson was really Poseidon's son, of course he is. Y/n felt like they really did treat her like family afterwards. Each other them brought her in like she was family. No longer seeing her as someone who was trying to break up the family. But as someone who might just bring the family together.

The end*

[useful-wasting-of-ink]

Life Before Death

Part 3 - Luke

Find “Part 1 - Reggie” Here

Find “Part 2 - Alex” Here 

“The last two years of Luke, Reggie, and Alex's life as told through their trauma and their support of one another.”

TRIGGER WARNING: suicide attempt, anxiety, fighting, running away, death, pain, let me know if anything else needs to be mentioned.

Luke rarely fought with his parents, but when he did fight, it lasted a while. They didn’t like him spending so much time on the band. And his grades had never been the best, but they began to drop when they started booking gigs and rehearsals got more serious. They didn’t mind him hanging out with friends, but they liked it when he focused more on school, and when he wasn’t out past midnight every other night. 

Luke was smart. He liked to read, he enjoyed history, but he just didn’t care for school. The only reason he kept going was for his parents. Because he knew how important it was to them that he get an education. 

The fighting got worse as his grades dipped, he spent more and more time at the garage, usually, Reggie or Alex would be there too, avoiding their own homes. 

There were nights he would show up at the garage late at night and find Reggie sleeping on the couch, and others where Alex was playing his drums so loud his ears didn’t stop ringing for an hour. 

Sometimes Bobby would be there, just cause he had nothing better to do, but that was rare. Bobby had a good family, who supported him and didn’t care what he did with his free time. 

When Luke ran away, the others knew immediately. He’d shown up at Alex’s house looking absolutely wrecked. Maddie had opened the door for him, but Alex had been right behind her. 

“Are you okay?” Maddie had asked as Alex rushed towards him. 

Luke had given her a weak smile, “I’ll be alright.”

Reggie had been called over immediately, and the three sat together for as long as they could but Reggie had to go home later that night. Luke had spent the night crying into Alex’s chest. 

He spent most of that year living in the garage. It wasn’t hard, it had a bathroom with a shower, and they had a minifridge in the corner. But there were nights he’d crash at Alex’s or Reggie’s when their parents were out for the night.

Alex’s parent’s still weren’t happy with Alex’s “decision to be gay” as they put it, so the only times Luke or Reggie could spend the night was when they were going to be out all night.

Luke tended to show up at his friend’s houses unannounced in the middle of the night when he was having a bad night. That was always something that he did, though it got more common after he ran away. He never liked being alone, and now he was almost always alone. 

Luke was depressed, he didn’t like to admit it, but it got hard for him sometimes. His parents knew that he wasn’t always feeling the best, but only Alex and Reggie knew the true extent of how bad it got. They were there at his absolute worst times. Alex had done his math homework the night after his attempt in tenth grade (they didn’t get much sleep that night, and Luke didn’t get much support from his parents after getting home from the hospital). Reggie had been the one to pull the blade out of his hand. He’d shown up at Luke’s house to get some help with homework and ended up at the hospital with blood on his hands. 

Luke had been released with stitches five hours later, and no one gave him a second glance (both Reggie and himself had been very insistent that it was merely a cooking accident involving a fallen knife). Alex had been there to pick them up from the hospital because Luke had decided halfway through the panic that he didn’t want his parents there, they tried to argue but he didn’t care. 

Reggie had used the payphone to call Alex and get him to come and pick them up. They’d gone back to Luke’s and didn’t leave his bedroom until lunch the next day when Reggie went to go get pizza for the three of them. Luke had fallen asleep fairly quickly, but Alex and Reggie couldn’t bring themselves to take their eyes off him. Alex was afraid if he stopped looking at him he’d disappear, Reggie was scared that if he closed his eyes he’d be back to holding the blood-soaked cloth over his best friend’s arm, trying to stop the bleeding. 

Around 5 AM Alex finally convinced Reggie to get some sleep, so Reggie fell asleep with his head on Alex’s chest and Luke’s hand in his. He hadn’t let go since they’d gotten back. 

When Luke had woken up the next morning, Alex and Reggie were both asleep next to him, and he realized how lucky he was to have them as his friends. 

Luke sat at the desk in Reggie’s room, he was staring down at his songbook, but he couldn’t figure out the lyrics he wanted to write. Alex and Reggie were sitting on the bed, and Alex was talking Reggie through a math problem he couldn’t figure out. 

Alex was good at that, explaining math to people. He’d helped Luke get his grade up on multiple occasions, and the three of them always studied together before a big test. He had been a math tutor for a couple of months, but it didn’t last long, he just didn’t have the time.

Luke turned around to stare at them, Reggie’s tongue was sticking out in concentration, and Alex was pointing at something on the page before trying to show Reggie how to do the problem on paper. 

Alex looked up and smiled at him before turning back to Reggie, the smile gave Luke butterflies, but he couldn’t explain why. He got the same feeling when Reggie would laugh at one of his jokes, or the three of them were hanging out and one of them touched his hand unexpectedly. It just happens.

Luke got up and went to sit by them, leaning over Reggie’s shoulder to watch what they were doing. Reggie leaned back onto him, letting his head fall back onto his chest. It was obvious to Alex and Luke that he was done with studying for the night. 

“Why do letters have to be in math? It was hard enough when it was just numbers, I don’t even know how to divide!” Reggie was mumbling. 

Luke laughed a little, wrapping his arms around him, “I’m gonna be honest, I’m not entirely sure I know how to divide either.” 

“I can teach you both how to divide if you’d like?” 

“No!” Reggie and Luke answered in unison. 

“Okay, okay, maybe another time,” Alex laughed, grabbing their textbooks and putting them on the floor. 

He laid back on the bed, “Reg, I love ya, but you need to buy new sheets. You’re 17, and your pillows have stormtroopers on them.” 

“My sheets are awesome, thank you very much. But also they’re just the most comfortable sheets I can find…” 

Luke nodded at that, “They are very comfortable. And I mean, the blankets are nice, it’s just plain red. Who cares about pillowcases or anything, I’m pretty sure my pillowcases still have flowers on them…” Luke hadn’t talked about his house in over a month, it wasn’t his favorite topic. 

Neither Alex nor Reggie commented, but Alex saw the way his eyes began to water and how his face scrunched up like he was in pain. Reggie noticed how Luke’s fingers began to tap slightly faster where they rested on his wrist.

Luke was holding Reggie in his arms, and Alex was laying on the bed next to them. Luke felt safer when he was touching someone, especially if it was Alex or Reggie. Even if they were just barely touching hands, it was an instant sense of relief. 

Luke wasn’t a happy person. He had a lot of issues, and he didn’t like talking about them. He wrote a lot of it into music, but he never showed anyone those songs. Sometimes he’d purposely leave his book laying open where one of them would find it, and he would find it again laying on top of his bag later that day. Whoever had found it wouldn’t talk to him about it, they knew that wasn’t what he wanted, but they gave him a hug, and a reassuring smile and they knew that that was what he wanted and that was what he needed. 

After Luke’s attempt, he spent a lot of time sitting at his desk, writing. That had been two years ago, when he was 15. The way he felt that night never really left him, but he fought it off the best he could. He realized the effect his death would have on the people he loved.

There were nights he would struggle and there were nights he’d call Alex in a panic because his head hurt so bad from the racing thoughts. Alex would come over and sit with him for hours, holding his hands so he couldn’t scratch at the skin on his arms. He would come up with strange conversation topics to help get his mind off of whatever was going on. There were also nights where Reggie would be the one to get on his bike at midnight and they would sit on the floor of Luke’s room and talk until they saw the sunrise.

Luke knew how to tell when Alex was having a bad day and when Reggie’s parents were going at it again. Alex knew how to tell when Luke was barely holding his head up, and Reggie was about to pass out from sleep deprivation. Reggie knew how to get Alex out of a situation that gave him anxiety, and how to get Luke to lay down and take a break. The three of them knew each other inside and out.

It was no surprise when Luke confessed to his feelings for the other two, and they reciprocated those feelings. They kept their relationship secret, of course. It was 1995, being gay was one thing, being in a relationship with two people was completely different. And both were frowned upon. 

They had been sitting in the garage, it was late and none of them wanted to go home (Luke couldn’t go home). And in a sleep-deprived state, Luke decided to confess. It had taken a minute for the other two to completely comprehend what he had said, and there had been a lot of asking for clarification (Luke had been trying to get them to understand what he was saying without actually saying it). But at the end of it, after a long conversation about feelings, they decided to try a relationship. 

One night, when the three of them were at Alex’s house (his parents had gone out for the night), Luke woke up to Maddie trying to get Alex awake. She knew that they spent the night, so it didn’t bother her that the three of them were in the bed, but she was crying and Alex wasn’t waking up. He had had a long day, so Luke wasn’t exactly surprised that he wasn’t waking.

“Maddie?” He asked quietly, “Are you okay?” he sat up to look at her, squinting in the dark room. 

“I had a nightmare and I tried not to come bother you guys, but I’m scared and Alex isn’t waking up,” she talked fast, and it was obvious in her voice that she was scared. 

“Do you want me to come downstairs and we can watch some TV?” he asked, knowing that Alex needed to sleep. 

The light from the hall made it easier to  see her nod in the dark room, “okay, I’ll be down in a minute,” he watched as Maddie left the room.

Luke got up and put some clothes on before heading downstairs. Maddie was sitting on the couch rewinding a VHS tape, Beauty and the Beast was her favorite, and Luke didn’t mind sitting through it for the fourth time that month. 

Luke had been around when Maddie took her first steps, he was there for all of her birthdays, and so had Reggie. She looked up to them, and she thought of them as her brothers. 

There was one day Alex couldn’t go pick her up from school, and so Luke went instead, and almost started crying when he heard her tell her friends “I gotta go, my brothers here!” and she ran up and gave him a big hug. 

“Okay, kiddo. It's past midnight, so don’t tell your parents, but do you want some hot chocolate?” 

Maddie grinned, nodding quickly. Luke laughed, going to make two cups of hot chocolate in the kitchen, trying to keep quiet so Alex and Reggie didn’t wake up. They both deserved to get some more sleep. He added extra marshmallows to Maddie’s cup and walked back to the living room a few minutes later to find the movie starting. 

Maddie fell asleep with her head in Luke’s lap, and Luke didn’t have the heart to wake her up to move her back to her own room, so he sat there until morning when Alex came downstairs to find him. 

Alex smiled at the sight of the two of them, but it was nearing seven and his parents would be home soon so they all had to get dressed and at least pretend that they hadn’t spent the night. He leaned down to kiss Luke’s cheek, who had woken up when he heard the stairs creak. 

Alex then shook Maddie’s shoulder softly, “Mads, wake up,” he spoke quietly.

“Alex!” she grinned, jumping up to give him a hug, “we watched Beauty and the Beast and Luke made hot chocolate!” 

“Is that so?” he glanced at Luke, who just smiled innocently in return. 

She nodded quickly, “Yep!”

Maddie was definitely a morning person.

Reggie woke up twenty minutes later when Luke and Alex came back upstairs to get him up, “It’s half past go away,” he mumbled when Luke stole the blankets from him. 

Luke grinned, “It’s actually half-past seven, but I guess that works too.”

Reggie flipped him off before curling into a ball to try to regain some warmth, “Let me sleep,” he mumbled. 

Alex laughed at him, “You gotta get up, Reg. My parents will be home soon so we all gotta get dressed.” 

Reggie groaned, sitting up to stare at them, “Are we going to the garage today?”

“We could, but we probably won’t be rehearsing. Bobby is busy, so we’d probably just hang out,” Luke tossed Reggie’s flannel at him, along with his jeans. He was already wearing his black tank top, which he fell asleep in. 

“I’m down to just hang out if Alex is?” 

Alex shrugged in response, “I don’t see why not, it’s not like any of us had anything better planned. We just gotta wait for my parents so Maddie isn’t alone. I can tell them you came over to pick me up and we didn’t want to leave Maddie by herself.”

The three got dressed, except for Luke who was already mostly dressed. Reggie grabbed his backpack, slinging it over his shoulder before following Alex downstairs. Luke sat on Alex’s bed for a minute, just thinking about life.

The boys broke up a week before they were supposed to perform at the Orpheum. It was a unanimous decision, though that didn’t make it any easier on any of them. They all cried. But their relationship didn’t suffer from it. It took them a few hours, but the next day they were right back to their old selves. They still cuddled, and there were still a lot of hugs and touchy moments, but they were friendly touches. They had decided that it was better for them as a band, and as friends, that they weren’t in a relationship. 

The day they were supposed to perform was one of the craziest days of any of their lives. Bobby was the only one who managed to stay calm throughout the entire day (and Alex was pretty sure that was because he only half cared). Alex had a panic attack in the dressing room, Luke kept tripping everywhere he stepped, and Reggie kept forgetting the words to the songs (he made them up on the spot if he couldn’t remember).

“This is it, boys, we’ve worked so hard to get here and now we’re finally here and soundcheck is in an hour,” Luke was always the one to hype them up before a show, he was good at it, “After tonight, nothing can stop us. The world will know our name, god… tonight defines our future. Even if we mess up, it’s still going to be the best show we’ve ever played.” 

Alex was twirling one of his sticks between his fingers, anxiety present on his face, but it was obvious that he was also more excited than he’d ever been before. 

“I left tickets on the counter of our kitchen, I hope my parents come, I’d love for Maddie to see us play.” Maddie had never been to one of their shows, and neither had Alex’s parents. 

“I left tickets too, but I don’t think my folks are gonna show…” 

“I sent my parents a letter, but I didn’t leave a note, just the tickets… Maybe they’ll come? I should never have left...” Luke looked up towards the ceiling, staring at the lights there. 

All three boys looked at Luke, though Alex and Reggie were the most shocked. He rarely talked about his parents, and the only regret he ever showed was though Unsaid Emily. 

Bobby was sitting on the couch with his feet up on the table, “who cares if our parents show? This is our night, not theirs.” 

Alex rolled his eyes, ignoring him. 

“It’s our night, which means that they should be here supporting us,” Luke was not one to ignore people’s ignorant comments. 

“Whatever, man.”

Soundcheck felt like it passed in seconds, though it was really only about an hour. And now they had another two hours before the actual show. The three boys always spent the last hour before their shows together if there was nothing else they had to do. Usually they’d just sit around until they were called on stage, but today was different. Today they were playing on their own, today they were the center of attention.

Sure, they’d played their own gigs before, but never like this. Never this big. Never this important. 

They were all on edge, and it was understandable. This was the biggest night of their lives. Too bad it was also the last.

They died just like they lived. Together. 

Luke went first, he had been feeling ill since the first bite but thought it was just nerves. It wasn't just nerves. Alex was having a panic attack, which may have been why he was the next to die. His body was fighting too hard for too many things at once. Reggie was last, he had to listen to both his friend's flatline, had to feel Alex's hand go limp in his own, but he was too tired to feel anything other than pain. Luke had died quickly, and Alex soon followed, but Reggie had to be there for all of it. None of them were entirely conscious while in the ambulance, they were in pain, they were tired, and they just wanted to sleep, but Reggie was there the longest, he remembered the most. And it was haunting

The paramedics said there was nothing they could do. But they kept them together in their last moments, and that was the best thing they could have done.

[oncerpotter2018]

So, it's nearly time for Whumptober again and thereby I decided to participate in my first ever Whumptober. Below is the list of this year's prompts and the summaries of what I am planning to write. The titles of my work is in red. I am doing this event as to help me practice my writing skills in short fiction as well as enjoying my love for writing some whump. I'm very into hurt and comfort or angst fics. I also wanted to focus mainly on my favourite OTP Cherik... I'm trying not to give too much of the story away in the summaries. Also all these stories will also be available on my AO3 if anyone is interested.

Cherik Whumptober 2020 // Summaries and Titles with Prompts

1. Waking up restrainted

All Mine Now

Erik wakes up unable to move, his body tied down as he notices the ropes binding him. He wanted to know what is happening but is approached by a mysterious man as he tortures Erik while being restrainted. The man doesn't allow Erik free knowing there is no escape.

2. Pick who dies

It's the Trolley Problem

Charles was forced to make the most toughest decision when he is faced with a moral dilemma. He was made to choice between saving his sister, friends and students from the school that is about to blow up or save Erik, his husband from being killed right in front of him. Charles knows he could only choice one but they were all awful decision. What should he do?

3. Held at gun point

Tougher Than The Rest

It was about time that they catches up to him and Erik knew that. At some point he knew that Charles couldn't hid him forever from the Government. So while despite Charles' pleas of begging him not to let him do what he was about to do Erik didn't listen. He let the CIA take him in and there they torture him and beat him before placing a gun to his forehead and with his final words, Erik closed his eyes knowing there is nothing they could do about it.

4. Collapsed building

You Before Me

Charles and Erik were at the school as they were having their time alone. Erik follows Charles down to Cerebro to help him with finding more mutants when all of the sudden, the school started to tremble and soon enough the emergency sirens goes off as bits of rumble begins to fall. Charles tells him to leave but Erik stays and tell him to get the staff and children out first. The last thing that Charles sees is Erik holding the ceiling before metal and plaster fell where Erik stood.

5. Failed escape

So Close Yet So Far

Erik was running as fast as he could to out run his kidnappers. He had out ran others before but this time he was outnumbered. He was so close to finally earning his freedom when he was captured once more as he swore he heard Charles' voice in the distance.

6. Stop please

Don't Touch Him

Charles watches as they beat the hell out of Erik. He is forced to watch them take Erik in their hands and murder him right in front of him. All Charles could do was watch as they kill his lover as a retaliation of his actions. All Charles wanted was for them to stop, to make them leave him alone but there was nothing he could do about it.

7. Carrying

I'll Be Your Hero

Charles finds Erik battered and broken on the side of an ally way. His face and body covered in bruises and fresh blood still all over himself. Charles decides to take him home where he takes care of him. He nurses him back to health where at one point while under the medications, Charles could have sworen Erik had confessed his love for him. Was it just his imagination or was it real?

8. Don't say goodbye

Death Was Never The Option

Charles knew that time was nearly up as he pulls Erik into his arms. The war was over and all Charles could do was cry as he kissed Erik on the lips knowing he won't respond. Was it reallt all over?

9. Take me instead

It Should Be Me

Charles was held back as he and Raven begged them not to kill Erik. Charles screamed all he could to make them stop waht they are doing. He begged them that it should be him. That he was the one who told the CIA about their plans. That it was him that stopped Shaw from getting away with destroying the world. But Shaw wasn't having it. He wanted to punish Charles by punishing Erik. To break him until it breaks Charles.

10. Trail of blood

The Road of Blood That Leads To You

Erik was bleeding and Charles knows it. He and the others could see a trail of blood where Erik had escaped. He could see the blood getting heavier and thicker as he hadn't gone far. They finally find him but to Charles' horror it seemed as if they were too late. Erik was crumpled over a field of grass, a trail of blood leading to him. His eyes were closed.

11. Struggling/ crying

There's No Escape Now

Erik had tried to escape but it was no use. The chains that was holding him prisoner was putting a straight on him as he could barely breath with the collar around his neck. He was struggling to get himsefl out to only cry himself to sleep when he realised that there is no escape from what his fate holds. He only wishes if Charles could be there, to help him out but he knew Charles won't do that.

12. Broken down

Nowhere To Be Found

Charles and Erik decided to go for a road trip to get away from the students for a while until the car had broken down in the middle of nowhere. They tried to call for some help and when they find it they are pleased to find a person to help them. But horrible things starts to happened when Erik goes missing.

13. Oxygen Mask

Take My Breath With You

Erik has been in a hospital for weeks which turned into mouths and now its turning into a year when Charles stayed beside him holding his hand. Charles hoped so badly that he will get better. He longed to see him open his eyes and hear him speak. But the only thing Charles sees is the oxygen mask covering his mouth breathing for him.

14. Fire

Burn Baby Burn

Charles and Erik are in collage together and are sharing a dorm with their other friends. Soon the fire alarms goes off and being in a wheelchair gave Charles the advantage of being on the ground floor. They all rush to the emergency assembly outside but the fire had started to spread quickly as the last thing Charles sees before Hank pushes him outside was Erik being left behind to help Darwin and Sean.

15. Possession

Someone I Used to Be

Charles wakes up not knowing what happened last night. He looks around and sees that the house was a mess and everything was trashed. Soon his phone rang and it was Raven telling him to go to the hospital. He sees that Erik has been there and when he wakes however when he sees Charles, Erik seemed frightened and confused. Charles tries to reach for his hand but he pulls away. He doesn't know what to do.

16. Shoot the hostage

Caught In The Crossfire

Erik was just supposed to be only out for a few minutes. He was only supposed to go out shopping. Charles never expected that he would be caught in a crossfire at a daylight robbery. He didn't expect Erik to be taken hostage among the others. It was all over the news, it was all over the papers and it was the knock on his door.

17. Blackmail

Little Secrets

Erik Lehnserr had done bad and terrible things, he had done things he wishes he could take back. So when he a ghost from his past threatens to blackmail him into telling Charles about the one thing he wishes he could forget, Erik does their bidding. They make him kill and silence those that didn't follow their orders. But when Erik couldn't do a kill, they give him a choice: Be punished or let the secret of his get let out to Charles. Erik choses to be punished.

18. Phobia

Among Us

Charles has been sacred of the dark for as long as he remembered. So when he is asked to go down to the basement to get some supplies, the darkness that lurked down there scared Charles until he couldn't do the task set out for him. When going to bed, he made sure Erik was by his side, knowing he was safe. When he suddenly woke from a nightmare and realised Erik wasn't there beside him, he bagan to panic but Erik came to his rescue.

19. Survivors guilt

I'm Sorry

They promised that they will escape together. They both promised that the both of them will make it out alive. But when rescue does come, Erik was the one who got left behind. Charles wanted them to rescue him too but they said he was more important. They knew of Erik's past and his attacks on the city so they didn't bother trying.

20. Lost

In The Darkness

After being lost for hours with no way of getting home, Charles and Erik had an argument on whos fault it was. So when they decided to split out, Charles in the end found a road was a body, he didn't take notice of it at first but soon he got curious and walked towards it only to realise that it was Erik.

21. Hypothermia

Cold Water

Charles had just rescued Erik from the cold water. He managed to get him in time or so he had thought. By the time he had rescued him Erik was already experiencing high levels of hypothermia which caused Charles to take serious actions and get him warmed up as soon as possible.

22. Drugged

What Did You Do?

While at a party, Charles and Erik had gotten some drinks. They chatted and flirted with each other for a while before Charles excused himself to the bathroom. A woman sat next to Erik and tried to chat him up but he declined and said he already has a boyfriend. She insisted to talk to him and while talking to him another man sat close to him and drugged his drink. After a while Erik started to get dizzy and collapsed. What will Charles do when he realises Erik is no longer there?

23. Exhaustion

Need A Little Break

Erik had been training so hard that just a week into their training Erik collapses out of exhaustion. He faints in front of the others students and Charles that they crowd around him. Charles takes care of him to make him feel better.

24. Blindfolded

Unseen Love

Erik was being kidnapped and the last thing he sees before the blindfold is placed over his eyes was Charles. All he could see then was the look on Charles' face as tears streamed from his eyes. The blindfold doesn't come off until he was tied to a pole and sees Charles in front of him with a gun. The last thing that Erik hears that came from Charles' mouth was that he was sorry.

25. Blurred vision

Tears Of An Angel

Charles couldn't see through the tears that blurred his eyes. He couldn't see the blood in his hands as he held onto Erik's dead body.

26. Migraine

The Cons and Pros of Being Telepath

Charles knew that being a telepath can sometimes sucks. It's sucks the most especially for when the migraines comes in and he has to make them stop before his next class. But he knows that Erik is only a few doors away to make him feel better. After each class he can't wait to get a head massage and a warm tea from his boyfriend Erik.

27. Power outrage

Goodnight! Goodbye

While having a break at the staff room, the school experienced a power outage and the whole school turned dark. Charles and Hank try to find the problem and so when the lights came on again they found something horrific.

28. Mugged

Let Me Be Your Hero

Charles and Erik were just walking home after a night out when a couple of young men tried to mug them. Charles complied immediately while Erik held him back. When Erik refused to do as they say, one of the men fired his gun at Charles hitting him in on the shoulder. Erik grew angry but was shot in a much more delicate place. Soon, ambulance and police sirens came close and took both of them to hospital. Charles survived but what about Erik?

29. Emergency room

Wait For Me

Erik was sent to hospital and was taken to the ICU as fast as they could. Erik was scared but not as scared as Charles was and when they had their last moments together Charles promised him that he will wait for him. Soon, Erik slipped into a coma. Charles is willing to wait for Erik to wake up.

30. Ignoring an njury

Blood In Your Hands

Erik had been shot in the stomach but didn't dare to tell Charles. He didn't want to sound weak. 0they carried on looking for mutants. They looked and looked until Erik couldn't do it anymore and collapses. Charles didn't understand what was happening until it was too late. Charles must get Erik the help he needs before anything else gets worse.

31. Left for dead

Vultures Awaits

Erik was left to die after a confrontation with an old enemy. He thought life as he knew it was about to slip way as he was being bleed tlo death. He wanted to wait for his body to rot away but it never happened. It seems that a unlikely outcome to his fate was changed the moment he cried for help.

[jj-lynn21]

Roman & Princess: You and Me and...

Notes: Spreading a little positive about Dialysis in this one. I was on dialysis 10 years before my current kidney transplant that has been working fine 23 years. I am lucky.  But I also want to share that Dialysis is not a death sentence like Hollywood movies and tv shows make it out to be, That annoys me so bad. I was patient coordinating while I was on dialysis 3 day a week for four to six hours.  The biggest issue I had was my blood pressure would drop real low. I still went out dancing after sometimes. A strict one cup a day/ 1000 ccs fluid restriction had to be followed and low potassium and low protein diet. So basically I ate pasta( LOL) I didn’t diabetes so I think that made it easier for me. I went through high school and two semesters of college while still on dialysis. I don’t think I could have held a full time job since it did make me get tired easier than most but everyone is different. I also told people if you follow your kidney diet you shouldn’t have a problem.  And way there is a dash about dialysis in this one so I wanted readers to know I was coming from a place of knowledge. No real warnings. Just lots of blood but you just expect that from a Roman fanfic.

__ _____________________________________________________________

The door slams shut as Roman tosses his brief across the table. Skin is paler than ever. He feels nauseated at the smallest sips from the blood bag in the refrigerator. As his stomach turns, he throws water on his face and that is when he hears the sounds of his girl lurching and dry heaving upstairs.  He rushes up.

Throwing the door open Roman sees the blood splatter on the toilet and floor as she is on her knees crying as she lurches again. “Oh, Hell, Princess.”

“Roman?” She looked up at him. Her eye lids heavy as she started to sway. “I don't feel so good.”

He grabbed her up right before she was passing out. Roman laid her gently on the bed.  “Call Dr. Pryce.” He screamed at his phone that he laid on the bedside table. He grabbed her some clean cloths as the phone rang.

“Hello Roman I was just about to call you about your test results.” His lack of really caring was evident in his voice.  

“I don’t fucking care about me right now,” Roman snapped. “My girl was puking blood when I came home. She passed out. I am bringing her to the white tower.”

“As you wish Roman,” Dr. Pryce’s voice had no reaction. “She is probably having a different reaction to the same enzyme I found in you. You both need dialysis treatments is my guess. See you when you get here.” He hung up abruptly before Roman could scream at him more.  

Roman finished dressing his Princess in under garments and a dark blue t-shirt dress. Then he swooped her, his phone and the car keys up to head to the white tower. He drove erratically. His eyes blurry, head heavy. He veered into the parking area hitting the wall before coming to a stop. He dented the front end of his new red Lexus SUV.  

Five men and women came out in white coats. Doctors Pryce and his assistance Dr. Galina followed them.  

“Roman you look like Hell,” Dr, Pryce commented nonchalantly. “Come with me. Dr. Galina will help your Princess.” He rolls his eyes thinking how ridiculous it is to give her a royal moniker.  

“I’m fucking living in Hell,” Roman picks up his girl. “I’ll bring her inside.”

“Nonsense,” Dr. Galina snapped. “Take the girl to my lab so I can run some tests. If she is the same as Roman, we will give her the same treatment promptly.”

“Don’t you dare hurt her or I will kill you all.” Roman threatened as the orderlies and nurses took her from his arms.

“Noted,” Dr. Galina said glibly. “You can come see her after your treatment.”  

Roman followed them until the area split where she was taken one way and he was taken another.  

“Sit please.” Dr. Pryce pointed his hand to a chair at the end of the room with a machine near it with tubing running through it. “I explained on the phone you have some foreign enzyme in your blood so we will be cleaning your blood. It may take more than one, four-hour treatment.”

Bright light pierces her eyes as they flutter open. Dr.  Galina leans over her with a clipboard in her hand. “Good you’re awake.” She checks the flow of the bag of blood hanging. “You gave Roman quite a scare. I didn’t realize he had such emotions. How do you feel?”

“A little better,” Roman’s girl said. “where? What happened?”

“You have that same enzyme in your system Roman does.” Dr,  Galina explained. “It prevented you from seeking nourishment like you should. I am cleaning your blood on this dialysis machine. And giving you blood. You may drink some when you think you can. But don’t worry, your baby will be fine. Would you like to sit up a little?”

“What?” Eyes wide as she looked at how she was attached to the machine.  

“Would you like to sit up?” Dr. Galina asked again. “You have about an hour left in this treatment. You can rest more if you like. A female upir in your condition needs her rest. And you need to drink more. Adding more beef or steak tartar might be a good idea also.”

She blinks a few times, “Are you serious? I’m pregnant?”

“Yes,” The Doctor answered her.

“Does Roman know?” His Princess pondered the reactions he might have from being angry to elated.  

“No,” Dr.  Galina set up the head of her bed. Moved the pill up. “would you like me to go do that dear?” This was not done out of kindness. She was curious of Roman’s reaction also.

“I’ll do it.” Her lips felt dry and she was getting a desire to rip into the Dr. She looked away from the vein pulsing in the Doctor’s neck. “Can I have a drink? Something fresh if you can.”

“I’ll do my best.” Dr. Galina  walked out. She told a lab tech, “Go watch over her. But I wouldn’t get to close if I were you.”  

The tech walked in the room. He smiled. “How are you doing, Princess.”

“I’m feeling better.” She smiled innocently as she heard the blood rushing through his body. “I could use the pillow behind me scooched up a little.”

The tech walked towards her slowly.  

“Is something wrong?” She tilted her head eyes big and bright. Face of an angel to the tech. “Fix my pillow please?”

“Everything is fine, I guess” He fluffed her pillow. “Anything else?”

“Yes.” She grinned before grabbing him down with one arm. Her mouth opens, teeth bite down on his shoulder to drink. He is paralyzed in fear.  

In minutes Dr. Galina  walks in with a glass full of nutrients. She audibly gasped. “What are you doing?”

Princess drops the lifeless body. “I thought you sent him in so I could have a fresh drink. You didn’t?” Her voice was calm and innocent as she licked at what got on her fingers.

Dr. Galina shakes her head, “I’ll clean you up before Roman comes to see you.’

She gets everything cleaned up. Princess stands still hooked to the dialysis machine. A chair with a blanket was put in the place of the bed. A clean white gown was put on her before she sat down. Other than being slightly tired, she felt much better than when she got there.  

Roman walked in as she was getting the 17-gauge needles pulled from the shunt the Doctor had put in her arm for the dialysis treatments. He pulled up a chair to rest beside her. ‘How are you feel, my Princess?”

“Much better.” She looked down biting her bottom lip nervously as Dr. Galina held pressure on the needle marks so they would stop bleeding.  

“The dialysis treatment wasn’t painful.” Roman lifted her chin up to look at him. “Just the needle sticks sting for a moment. So, tell me what’s wrong? Are you hungry? Is your stomach still upset?”

“I’m not sure how, I mean I know how but Roman...” She stammered not sure how to tell him the news.

Roman took her hand. “Just tell me what the problem is, and I will fix it, I promise.”

She took a deep breath, “Roman, I’m, we’re, pregnant.”  

The look on Roman’s face is a mix of worry and excitement. “Oh, fuck, serious? Of course, your serious. Hell, I am so happy. It is scary as Hell but I’m happy. I’m sorry, Princess. How do you feel about this?  

“The same,” Princess beamed.

Dr. Galina stays quiet as she put band aids on the needle marks. Princess threw her arms around Roman as soon as she could. “You are seriously happy about this?”

“Yeah, your tits are going be huge.” Roman grinned. “Not that they are not perfect now.” He puts his hand on her lower tummy. “when? How far along are you?”

“Three months,” The Doctor said. “She is ravenous. You must keep her nourished.”

“That won’t happen again, I promise.” She started crying. “I thought you sent him for me, I swear.”

“It’s okay baby.” Roman held her close. “What happened?”

“She killed Bill.” Dr.  Galina explained. “I shouldn’t have sent him in here. But I did warn the idiot.”  

“See baby.” Roman comforted his girl. “It wasn’t your fault at all. You had to drink something.” His hand patted her bag lightly. “Do you feel up to shopping? There is so much we need for our kid.”

“I would love to go shopping,” There is a new giddiness in her voice.

“It’s just you, me and baby makes three, Princess.” Roman and her both laughed.

Over the next few months, they go through there treatments side by side until there blood is cleansed completely. She goes through extra testing to check the baby’s progress. Roman cares for her and buys her things to let her know how sexy she still is to him as the baby grows. He brings her home a new gift basket every day. 

[mcntsee]

Hey y’all! I don’t really write stuff, but I found some old writing prompts in my notes, so I’m just gonna share them for anyone that wants to use them! (I’ll keep updating the list)

1) "No one is coming to help you."

2) "Your screams are music to my ears."

3) "Keep your eyes open, I really want you to watch what I'm about to do to your little friend here."

4) "Does it kill you? Knowing that you can't do anything to stop me?"

5) "Don't worry, I'm not going to kill you just yet."

6) "You were always too soft, never could stand up for yourself."

7) "Where's your hero now when you need them the most? I don't see them."

8) "Do you really think they could ever love you?"

9) "Look at you now, you're pathetic. You're weak."

10) "I don't want to rush this, I've been waiting a long time for this moment so I want to be able to take my time with you."

11) "But they told me they loved me." "Aww, sweetheart, they were lying, I'm the only one who could ever love you."

12) "I never wanted to hurt people! I didn't want this life! You made me a monster."

13) "I didn't make you a monster, you were just born that way."

14) "Hope you're not too attached to that hand."

15) "You killed them, you bury them."

16) "You made me hurt them." "I didn't make you do anything you didn't want to do."

17) "Do as you're told or you're going to make me angry."

18) "Don't ever say that name in front of me again, do you understand?"

19) "I only do these things because I love you, you know that right? I don't want to hurt you, but you just make me so angry sometimes."

20) "Don't take me back there! Please, I can't go back there. They're there."

21) "If I tell you what they made me do you wont be able to look at me the same."

22) "Let them go. I did everything you asked me to do, now just let them go!"

23) "You're a talker, I never liked talkers. Let's see how much talking you can do with your tongue cut out."

24) "You never listen, but that's okay because after I finish carving up your little friend over here I think you're going to be able to hear me just fine.

25) "I've never smashed anyone's hand with a hammer before so this is going to be a first for both of us."

26) "What happened to you? What did they say to you?" "Please don't make me tell you."

27) "I can't sleep, every time I close my eyes I see them."

28) "They were right, I'm weak and I couldn't save them."

29) "Let them go and you can have me. Let them go and I'll never try to leave again. I promise."

30) "No, they were my friend. I should be the one to kill them."

31) "No, go on, say it. Say that you wish I'd died instead of them, I know you want to!"

32) "Why do you stay with them? You don't deserve to be treated like this, no one does."

33) "The only thing you've ever been good at is being a coward!"

34) "You don't belong here, you never did."

35) "You're a waste of air."

36) "You're useless."

37) "They hurt you, why do you go back?" "They're the only family I've got."

38) "You don't have friends, we're the only ones who are able to tolerate you.

39) "I've felt pain all my life, but now? I don't feel anything." "Good, then you're ready."

40) "I wish they would have let you die that day."

41) "You always were too emotional."

42) "What do hugs feel like?"

43) "Why does everything hurt?"

44) "Why doesn't anyone want me?

45) "Families are supposed to love you, not leave you." "Then I guess I've never had a family."

46) "Do you think I'll ever have a family one day?"

47) "How long do you think they can hold their breath underwater before they need to breathe?"

48) "Hey! Hey, wake up! How many of these did you take, huh? No, no, don't go back to sleep, you need to stay awake for me."

49) "Are you afraid of me too?"

50) "Why didn't you tell us you'd been hit? You almost died."

51) "Prove your loyalty. Kill them." "They're just a kid."

52) "Am I going to die here?" "No, okay? Just stay with me."

53) "Your efforts to be the good guy have been so cute but it's time to face reality. You were born to be bad, you'll never be the hero.

54) "I'm fine." "No you're not, you're losing a lot of blood."

55) "Save the others first. Save them first or all my fighting was for nothing."

56) "You see these scars? You did this to me."

57) "Do you think they knew I loved them before they died?"

58) "Could you ever forgive me?"

59) "I can't give up. They need me so I can never give up."

60) "You couldn't save your first love, what makes you think you can save your second?"

61) "It's okay if you're scared of dying, your friends were too."

62) "Whatever you want, anything you want, I'll give it to you. Just make it stop."

63) "They say I'm a monster and I never believed them but now I think they're right."

64) "I failed my mission, I couldn't save them. Their deaths are on me."

65) "I can't eat, I can't sleep, I can barely fucking breathe because they're gone and it's my fault. And god knows what they're doing to them right now and I'm just sitting here doing nothing!"

66) "Calm down, calm down, you were just dreaming."

67) "Take me instead, please?" "What would I want with someone as pathetic as you?"

68) "If you have to kill one of us kill me."

69) "I ruined your brilliant plan, I destroyed everything you built, I killed your friends, and now you've got one bullet left and two people in front of you. So, shoot me because if you shoot them and let me live I'm going tear you apart piece by piece. So, what's it going to be?"

70) "I know you've been out for a long time need you to do a job for me." "I'm not killing again." "Not even if the person I'm asking you to kill is responsible for all of your pain?"

71) "It'd be a shame if someone you loved got hurt, I know how much your friends mean to you."

72) "I hate myself when I'm with you."

73) "I wish you didn't have to be medicated to call me."

74) "This is all your fault. I wish you'd died in that car crash instead of them."

75) "I need to get up. They're dying so I need to get up right now."

76) "Just make it all stop, please, it hurts. Everything hurts."

77) "We can't be together. You know that. You and I bring out the worst in each other."

78) "Be a shame if you kept talking and I had to take out a few of those teeth to shut you up. Especially since you've got such a lovely smile."

79)  "Look at that, your hero came for you after all. They really do love you, huh? It's a shame you wont get the reunion you wanted."

80) "I know living with me hasn't been easy but I really am trying here."

81) "You put on such a brave face but the truth is you're terrified of what's out there."

82) "You think you're ready to do everything but you're not. You're not ready to kill someone, no matter how much you hate them."

83) "Everybody keeps telling me what to do, what to say, what to think, what to feel and I can't do this anymore, I can't. I feel like I'm not even a person anymore and I just need it to stop. I just want everything to stop!

84) "I'm just trying to keep you from dying! Don't you see that? I care about you and you are the last person I ever want to see dead out there, so just fucking listen to me for once!"

85) "I just want to keep you safe, there are a lot of bad people out there who want to hurt people like us. We have to be careful."

86) "Goddamn it, kid, don't you ever listen? Stay still, let me stop the bleeding, okay?"

87) "You are not one of us, okay? You're just some rando who got dragged into all this shit. So take this money, get a bus ticket, and go home, kid."

88) "What have I become?"

89) "Why hasn't anyone looked for me yet?" "Because they don't care about you like I do."

90) "I'm not a kid anymore so stop treating me like I am!"

91) "They left you all alone. Stay here with me and I'll never leave you. I can be your family and we can watch them all burn together."

92) "Why did you jump in front of me back there?" "Why didn't you move?"

93) "I never thought I'd see you again, they told me you were dead."

94) "Get under the bed and don't make a sound okay?" "But they'll get you." "Just get under the bed and no matter what you hear or what you see just stay completely quiet and completely still. Do that for me, alright?"

95) "Shh, it's just me, don't panic." "Don't sneak up on me like that."

96) "I feel so useless."

97) "You call out for them when you sleep. Do you want to talk about it?"

98) "My eyelids feel like they weigh a million pounds." "It's because you're tired, you should get some sleep. We have to save the world tomorrow."

99) "Hey! Hey, calm down. Calm down, it's just me."

100) "When I finish patching you up I swear to god I'm gonna kick your ass for making me worry about you."

[parischangedher]

This.

FF/Ao3. Season 17 promo spoilers. Integrates some ideas from posts about the reunion and how everyone will react. Hope you enjoy!

“Tony,” McGee said after his old partner answered the phone.

“Hey Tim,” Tony replied, distracted by his daughter’s voice in the background. “Hold on a sec--No, not now Tali. Go get ready and let me talk to Uncle Tim.” 

Tali’s voice faded as she obeyed her father’s instructions. “Sorry. Can I call you back? We’re already late for school and I’m still packing her lunch.”

“No, Tony, it can’t wait.” McGee said, taking a deep breath. “She’s alive, Tony.”

Tony sighed. “Tim, I told you a million times that I don’t need to hear about these cases anymore. That part of my life is over. And, I really do need to get going. Speaking of Tali, though--don’t let me forget to tell you what she did to this kid bothering her last week. You’d be so proud. She could even be a star on those kid karate shows, you know, and I want to teach her some self-defense just in case, but I’m a bit worried because, well--”

“Tony, shut up!” McGee said, his voice a strange mix of excitement and annoyance.

Tony sighed, slightly intrigued as he continued making Tali’s sandwich. “Alright, McSerious. Calm down, I’ll bite. Who’s alive?”

McGee paused for a moment before answering, trying to find the right words. 

"It’s...it’s her, Tony. It’s Ziva.”

The line fell silent as Tony’s jaw dropped. The knife he was using to spread Tali’s favorite peanut butter fell from his hand and clattered against the plate, suddenly incredibly insignificant. 

He clutched the phone tightly in his hand as blood drained from his face. Feelings he’d long buried came rushing back, and his mind ran wild with questions and disbelief.

“Tony? Did you hear me?” McGee asked. “Ziva’s alive.”

Tony stayed silent, trying to form a coherent response as tears started to form. He covered his mouth with his hand as paralyzing surges of hope, anger, confusion, and guilt overwhelmed him.

“Tony, Ziva’s alive,” he repeated, growing increasingly concerned at the silence. “And, she’s in danger.”

Those were the magic words, apparently, because Tony suddenly stood up straighter with fire in his eyes. No one can hurt her again. He cleared his throat.

“I’m on my way.”

Tony hung up abruptly. Still grasping his phone, he crumpled to the ground in a small sob as the news finally started to sink in. She’s alive.

It was as if he was grieving all over again--but this time, grieving for the choices he made. For not staying with her in Israel or checking in with her for three years. For accepting that she was dead. For wasting so much time. Why didn’t I see it?

He was furious at her, too, of course. For not returning to DC with him and not telling him about Tali. And, now, for letting him believe she was dead for three years.

But most of all, he was overwhelmed with pure joy and the strength of his love for her. How, despite everything she put him through, he would do anything to see her one more time. He reached into his wallet and pulled her Star of David necklace from its permanent spot, fiddling with the pendant. He slapped his hand against the cabinet beside him as more tears slipped down his cheek.

Tali ran out of her room with her backpack in hand and stopped short when she saw her father on the floor.

“Abba, why are you sad?”

Tony looked up at her and laughed softly, finally letting himself see the love of his life in his daughter’s eyes. She looks just like her. He held out his arms and drew Tali close.

“I’m...I’m not sad, Tali. Well, I’m a bit sad. And mad. And guilty, like when you do something wrong. But, most of all Tali, I’m...I’m...very, very happy.”

"Why?”

Tony squeezed her hand. “I’ll tell you someday, love. I promise. But right now, we have to go see someone very special.”

+++

When it was all over, McGee offered to bring Tony and Tali to Ziva’s cabin. Gibbs’ house was still a crime scene, after all, and he knew they needed a place to work this out alone.

Ziva paced around the cabin, trying to calm her pounding heart. Although she had six years to think about what she would say to Tony if she ever saw him again, she felt completely unprepared to confront the man currently making his way to her. The man from whom she took so much. The man whom she treated  terribly the last time she saw him. The only man who could render her speechless from just a glance. And, the man she loved more than any other.

She also had no idea how she would explain to her daughter why she left her with a stranger--even if he was her father--and ceased all contact for three years. A mission, perhaps? 

A cold shudder ran through her as another possibility dawned: Will she even remember who I am?

Lost in her own thoughts, she almost didn’t hear the cabin door creak open. She turned quickly, involuntarily reaching for her weapon before finally, finally seeing him.

“Hello, Tony,” she said, the nervousness in her voice betraying her calm exterior.

He said nothing for a moment. He could only stare, not quite believing his eyes that she was really there, alive and standing before him, waiting.

Relief washed over her as he finally spoke.

“Ziva,” he said, her name feeling familiar yet out-of-place on his lips. He smiled gently and quickly made his way toward her, wrapping his arms around her like he was afraid she’d disappear again. “Oh, Ziva,” he repeated, his voice breaking as a few tears slipped down his face. He kissed her forehead before cradling her face in his hands.

“I can’t believe it’s really you.”

Ziva could only smile and nod, returning his embrace as a tear of her own started to fall. Tony wiped it away with his thumb.

“Are you okay? Are you hurt?”

She shook her head. “No, Tony, I am fine.”

“Good,” he said before he ran his fingers through her hair. “God, I’ve missed you so much, Ziva.”

At that, Ziva glanced away as the guilt rose within her. “I know, Tony. I’ve missed you too. I am...sorry. I am so, so sorry.”

Tony rubbed her cheek softly, encouraging her to look at him. She met his eyes, silently begging him to forgive her for what seemed unforgivable. Her fear almost broke his heart. Again.

“I know that you did what you thought you had to do to protect Tali,” Tony said, his voice shaking. “But, Ziva...how you could you not tell me?”

After he was met with silence, he continued. “I would’ve been there, Ziva. I would’ve been there in a heartbeat. I wanted to be there--for her and for you. You didn’t have to deal with this threat and having our child--our child, Ziva--alone. You know I’ll always have your back no matter what. So...what happened?”

“I...” Ziva started, forcing herself to look at Tony. Her eyes pleaded with him to understand as she took his hand, interlacing her fingers with his. “I know. And I wanted to tell you, Tony. I did. It took a while for me to realize I was pregnant, and by the time I did the threat was already growing. It was...better for all of us if I didn’t make contact. Then, when it grew to be too much...I knew it would be safer if everyone thought I was dead. They would stop looking for her. So, I ran, and I sent her to you.”

“I know what it is like to lose both parents, Tony. I didn’t want the same for Tali. And I knew it was a real possibility with Zahar on the loose. When she was born, I promised her that she would have a better life than I did.”

She hesitated before continuing. “I also couldn’t stand the thought of something happening to you because of what I did all those years ago, if I had gotten you involved. I simply would not have been able to live with myself. So, I did what had to be done. I know it was a bit selfish, in that respect. But I was sure that it was the only choice I had. And, I honestly...I honestly did not think I would ever see you two again.”

“Neither did we,” Tony replied. Ziva stiffened at the words, her heart aching with regret. 

“I get it--at least, a part of me gets it,” he said. “But I have to be honest here, Ziva. I won’t start whatever this is with a lie,” he said as he gestured vaguely between them. “The other part of me is still ticked. Your fake death almost killed me. I’m going to need some time. And more answers.” 

Ziva's eyes widened with a mix of pain and hope about what he meant by this.

“But,” he continued. “I’m sorry, too.”

“You have absolutely nothing to apologize for,” Ziva said firmly. “I am the one who pushed you away. I didn’t tell you about Tali. I let you think I was dead, and I left you blindsided with a child you did not know you had. Please do not blame yourself for my mistakes, Tony.”

"I don’t. I blame myself for my own mistakes,” he said, rubbing his forehead. “I shouldn’t have left you in Israel, Ziva. I chose DC and all that crap over you. I didn’t check in on you. But mostly, I was a complete idiot when I accepted the idea that you were dead when I knew how well you are trained to disappear. Hell, I’ve worked enough cases to know that if there’s no body, there’s no proof. It’s crime 101.”

Ziva smiled softly and kissed his cheek. “We will get through this, Tony.”

“We must. Because I can’t lose you again, Ziva. I don’t care if I have to spend the rest of my life in some tiny South American village with no cell service,” Tony said, eliciting the laugh he adored so much.

“There are two mistakes I need to rectify immediately, though.”

"Yes?”

He didn’t answer right away. Instead, he took both her hands in his and gave each a soft kiss. A small shudder ran through her at the act, reminiscent of their time in the orange grove.

“Here’s the first: I will not let one more second go by without telling you. It’s actually on my bucket list,” he chuckled to himself.

“Telling me what, Tony?”

He took a deep breath before answering. No more wasting time.

“Telling you...that I love you, Ziva. I have loved you for years, and I will love you forever. When I said I couldn’t live without you, I meant it. I am a mess without you. I am hopelessly, hopelessly in love with you.”

His eyes bored into hers. He was scared. Half of him expected her to pull away, to end this before it even had a chance to begin.

A million emotions ran through her as she processed his words. Words she thought she would never have the chance to hear. Ziva moved closer to him and traced his jaw as a small smile formed.

“I love you too, Anthony DiNozzo. Movie references and all. I want whatever this is, too.”

Tony laughed and looked deeply into her eyes before he leaned down to meet her waiting mouth. Ziva wrapped her arms around his neck and returned the kiss as Tony snaked his arms around her back and pulled her closer. It was slow and soft at first, before it grew into something passionate and raw, full of pain and regret and hope and love. It marked a new beginning neither thought they would get, and they were determined to savor every moment.

Finally, Ziva pulled away as Tony moved to plant kisses on her neck. “What was the second thing?”

“Hmm?” Tony mumbled, now reaching her earlobe. Ziva couldn’t help but laugh. “The second thing you wanted to fix.”

Tony smiled and pulled back. “Ah. Yes. Well for that, I’m going to need a little help.”

He gave her one last peck before stepping away and opening the door, gesturing to the car. As quickly as she could, Tali ran from McGee’s grasp and into her father’s waiting arms.

“Tali, there’s someone here who wants to see you.” 

Ziva’s anxiety spiked. She could barely hold back tears as Tali made eye contact with her for the first time in three years. She had gotten so big, so strong, and so, so beautiful. 

Tali broke away from Tony and looked at her mother. She smiled shyly. “Ima?”

Ziva smiled and got on her knees to be at eye-level with her. “Yes, tateleh. It’s me. Do you remember?” She asked, praying to whatever God would still listen to her that the answer was yes. 

Tali pondered the question, fingering the Star of David necklace she had around her neck. After a moment, she nodded and broke into a DiNozzo-esque grin.

Ziva grinned back and held out her arms, gesturing Tali over. 

When the two met, Ziva couldn’t stop the tears she was holding back from streaming down her face. She gently rocked Tali, running her hands through her hair and whispering softly. “I love you, Tali. I am sorry I had to leave you. So, so, so sorry. Please forgive me.”

Tali started to pull back from Ziva--which nearly broke her. She then took something out of her pocket. “Abba told me that this is yours. I kept it safe on the plane for you, Ima.”

She opened her palm to Ziva, revealing her Star of David necklace. Ziva smiled and took it from her, replacing it with a kiss. “Thank you, Tali. I love it. And it’s just like yours!”

Tali giggled, again playing with her own child-sized star. 

“Do you think you and Abba can help me put it back on?”

She nodded and looked at Tony, who came over and knelt down beside them. Tony took the necklace from Ziva and gently moved her hair out of the way before wrapping the chain around her neck. He easily clasped the necklace and softly stroked the back of her neck, placing a chaste kiss on her hairline. Ziva turned to face him and smiled. Her hand finally grasped the pendant she thought she’d never wear again.

“Thank you, Tony.”

He smiled and looked at Ziva and Tali. “It’s beautiful. Just you two.”

Tali grinned and reached for both of her parents, together, for the first time. Tony and Ziva smiled at each other before fully embracing Tali, staying that way before their daughter broke the silence.

“Ima! Abba! I am squished!” she yelled as she struggled to break free of her parents’ grasps. Laughing, the two let go. It felt like home.

Tony smiled and kissed his daughter’s head. “You better get used to it, kid. Because Abba and Ima aren’t going anywhere.”

[nadiawrites14]

whagt the hell nadia has a creepypasta oc???

its october mf

wc: 3.6k

not very well written and a bit of a hot mess but still love this tall king <3

There was this kid at my school. 

There was a kid at my school, and I just really need to talk about him. I think it’s something I need to put out there. I am talking about it because anyone and everyone I talk to seems to never remember his name, or him in general, but I can’t stop thinking about his face.

I was never popular at school, and my brother always outshined me in that fact. He was a cheerleader, and I was his nerdy, unattractive sister. His friends were never friendly with me, and it wasn’t easy for me to make new ones, so I mostly kept to myself. Besides a few nice classmates, I was a bit of a loner, and this led me to Charlie.

Charlie Nguyen had always attended school in my city. I knew of him — we’d never actually talked, besides nearly 10 years of attending school together. Come to think of it, I don’t think anyone really talked to Charlie. He was always there, a lingering presence, and seemed to get on better with teachers than he did with other kids. Despite both of us being outcasts, we never interacted, right up until recently. He just tapped my shoulder in the hallway once, shyly staring at his feet and asking if I would like to eat lunch with him in the library. Despite his crooked posture and timidness, he towered over me. I was only as tall as his shoulder. I had nothing to lose from it, really — it was more preferable to spending lunch with Ernest and his friends, so I accepted cheerily which made him very happy. 

Talking to him, I was shocked at how much I missed out on by never bothering to strike up a conversation. He was funny, sweet, and a hell of a lot more intelligent than I had believed. I’d often seen my teachers slip back 70s and 60s to him, but in one of the library’s secluded corners, we discussed politics and art and existentialism. I don’t even know how we got into talking about philosophy and what defines the self, but by the time the bell rang, my lunch was not eaten and I was much more enlightened than I was before. It was like a lightning bolt. I told him I’d be glad to eat lunch with him tomorrow as well, and he seemed very appreciative of it. As I headed to my last class, I realized I forgot to ask for his number, but decided I’d ask the next day.

Something about Charlie was just so alluring. I didn’t know much about him at all, even after our daily lunches began — he was 17, from Fresno, and his mother passed when he was young. Half-Vietnamese, half-white, and he spoke broken Spanish and loved to draw cartoons in the margins of his notes. I found myself chatting with him through text past my bedtime, where we’d discuss our lives, our academics, our interests. One thing Charlie and I really bonded over was our shared interest in both Shakespeare and horror movies. He’d been enamored since he read Romeo and Juliet his freshman year, but Hamlet was his favorite. At the time, I was peeling through AP Literature with straight A’s and was much more concerned with Tolstoy and Plath and Camus, but his fascination with the bard was certainly something I could bond with him over.

I prefer the comedies, though. Midsummer’s Night, Much Ado, As You Like It. Charlie’s interest in the tragedies ranged from the general to the obsessive, where he would produce sermons and sermons of how much the words and writings spoke to him. Considering how much death was in Hamlet and Macbeth, his other favorite, it concerned me, but I passed it off as nothing unique. After all, he was also a fan of slashers and all things horror. He loved a good scare. Whenever I tried to coax him into visiting his house for a movie night or a sleepover, he’d defer, and I would glumly accept the sentence. Once I switched the proposed setting from his house to mine, he gladly accepted.

Ernest was a little bit less enthusiastic about my liaisons with Charlie. They had gotten into scuffles before. Ernest got a very stern slap on the wrist for pulling on Charlie’s crutch in the hall once, freshman year. I told him a week in advance, just so he knew to vacate the house the next Friday and allow me and what he so lovingly called ‘the creepy asshole’ to watch a movie together. Ernie huffed and puffed about it the whole week and it really began to get on my nerves. The entire week, he bugged me and demanded just what I saw in that freak. I excused it as brotherly overprotection, but as Friday grew closer, I started to realize that it was fear.

When he dropped me off that morning, I confronted him in the car. “Why are you so scared of Charlie?”

Ernie scoffed. “I’m not scared of Charlie.”

“You sound pretty paranoid when you’re dropping a curfew on me and telling me to not get too close or talk too much.”

“Well, mom and dad are out of the house, and I wouldn’t want anything to happen to you.”

“Charlie is a freak. He’s... creepy. I can’t place my finger on what’s up with him. Esme, just tell me, have you ever left the room with a splitting headache when you’re with him? Has your phone ever started bugging out? Hm?”

I thought back. Well, a few lunches in, I did have such an awful headache I had to excuse myself from class to go try and throw my guts up in the bathroom. It wasn’t that, though, and it had subsided by the end of the school day. The back of my skull would sometimes pound and contract, but I didn’t think it was anything, reducing it to pollution or mold in the school. It always ebbed when I left the school. For my phone, it would get a little buggy. Just a little buggy, though! I had no reason to think it was Charlie’s fault! It’s not like we live in a world where that shit happens. He’s not some psychic, he’s a weird, lonely kid with trauma. That’s it. And I let Ernie know that by screaming an expletive and slamming the door on him, spending the rest of the school day with a headache tenfold worse than the one I had all those weeks ago. By lunchtime, my head was pounding so fiercely I almost slipped and fell down the stairs. 

Charlie noticed, and asked what was wrong, a worried look on his face. I asked if we could postpone, and went on to talk about how awful my headache was. He seemed very disappointed about it but nodded and accepted with a smile. I felt so guilty about it, but it was quickly absolved, because when I walked out of the library with him I must have blacked out in the hallway. Charlie and one of the other teachers brought me to the nurse’s office, where my mother brought me home as I moaned in the backseat.

The rest of the afternoon was a blur. A literal blur behind my crowded vision and the blood rushing in my ears, but I do remember awaking in the darkness of my room at around 1:00 AM. The red light on my digital clock said so. I awoke to the sound of something like water boiling, or when a witch’s brew bubbles inside of a movie or cartoon. It was bubbling, dripping, wet — but when I pulled back my curtain, everything appeared dry. No rain, not even any clouds. The stars were quite clear, due to the fact that it was a new moon. Despite that lingering sound of bubbling and popping, I was able to fall back asleep. I don’t know how long I slept, but when I came downstairs the next morning, my parents (and an over-concerned Ernie) were adamant that I stay home all weekend. I accepted that the next two days would be filled with boring movie binges and cups of hot soup and tea, and I plopped back under the covers. My head began to pound every time I checked my phone. I noticed Charlie had sent me a few texts, but I didn’t have the heart nor the energy to check what he had said. 

Sunday is when things actually began to get weird. The batteries in the remote for my TV had gone kaput, and I remembered that Ernie usually kept the same type in his desk for his old lamp. It was easier to walk across the hall to his room than down two flights of stairs into the basement. I knocked, and when there was no response, I entered. The lights were off. This was strange, because Ernie always loved to keep lights on. My parents constantly griped about seeing his outline in the window as late as 11, either from the strip LED lights that lined his room, the fairy lights, the candles, or the overhead light. I flipped the light switch and rubbed my eyes, as it was the most brightness I had seen in the past two days. Beginning to feel a tad nauseous, I took a seat at Ernie’s desk, trying to recall which drawer he kept his batteries in. As I searched, though, I noticed one drawer was shut from the inside, most likely from a heavyweight.

I should have just kept it shut. I shouldn’t have pressed. I should have gotten what I needed and left it alone, left my golden boy brother’s life completely alone. Then I could live knowing he didn’t have any dark secrets despite being a little bit of a bully and just a tad too standoffish. But, being the curious girl I was, I kept pushing until the drawer gave in.

Composition notebooks. The white smudges across the notebook covers had been filled in with dashes of pen, each one meticulously filled in. All five of the notebooks had this pattern. Blacked out, no name on the lines or any signage, otherwise normal in appearance. By that point, I should have known, but I kept going. I was once again shrouded in that same allure I felt around Charlie, the strange sense of being drawn in. When I opened the first notebook, I had to stop myself from making a sound. Every single page. Every single page in that notebook was filled with scratches in multicolored ballpoint pen, pleads and hypotheses and prayers. Drawings, maps, entries. The pages were thin from being worn down so deeply with the frantic pen marks, and many of the pages had been torn through from the intensity of the writing. My nausea grew and I began to feel my head pounding again. But I just couldn’t stop. Trying to process those frantic words written and dated and laden with tables and records and drawings was like trying to decipher hieroglyphics. Particularly, there was one symbol and one familiar figure that was retained throughout the notebook’s contents. An O with an X slashed through it. It reminded me of how I marked my bubbles on Scantrons, one line through, one line through, shade in the bubble. And the figure. The figure. A faceless man, a white oval of a face atop a suit and tie, and what looked to be tentacles pouring out from the sides. 

I was snapped out of my trance by the sound of footsteps rising up the stairs. I dumped the notebooks back in my drawer, besides the fourth one, which I tucked in the back of my shorts and underneath my sweatshirt. Ernie looked at me weirdly as I exited his room, but I offered a weak smile and held up the pack of batteries. He nodded, and I disappeared back into my room.

It fascinated me, and it scared me. When the oncoming headache and nauesa had left, I scanned over all his words and entries, observing each of his drawings and sentences and deconstructing like a true AP student should know how to do. I always assumed Ernie was going to parties when I heard his window open and shut or when he warned me he wouldn’t be home until late, not investigating supernatural entities in our affluent suburban town and measuring sound waves through apps he’d downloaded onto his phone. I hadn’t known Ernie was this brilliant. It took me about two hours of reading and rereading that singular notebook until I had connected the dots.

A few years ago, our cousin Ronnie disappeared. Ronnie and Ernie were best friends, close like brothers, and were inseparable at each and every family gathering. What I knew for certain about Ronnie is that he also had a particular fascination with ghost-hunting. He went out on frequent escapades with his girlfriend and her brother with some handy professional equipment in the most ‘supernatural’ bits of California. Most of my family excused it as a strange hobby that didn’t subtract from Ronnie’s successful business career, not until all three of the ghost-hunting squad disappeared without a trace while investigating the Lassen National Forest. No DNA, no bodies, no signs or directions or a reason were ever found. Even their car and all their expensive equipment, all of Ronnie’s research, had vanished into thin air. It seemed he had become one of those ghost stories he so adored to pursue. It didn’t hit me that hard, as I hadn’t known Ronnie all that well, but I hadn’t factored in how much of Ernie’s personality had changed since the disappearance. He had become more standoffish with his rivals, more competitive with his athletics, more jumpy and paranoid.

I should have known by the way he looked at Charlie. I assumed it was drama I had missed out on or the pure perils of high school hierarchies. But I had never noticed how hateful, how accusatory it really was. For some reason, I was certain that Ernie had it in his head that all of these things were connected. The Faceless Man, the disappearance of our beloved Ronnie Halaifinoua, and the outcast at my school who was seemingly responsible for bugged out phones and splitting headaches. It made no sense, but at the same time, it was like a missing piece to a puzzle that I simply had to snap into place. I hid the notebook in my schoolbag, and went back on Monday armed with a bottle of aspirin and comfortable clothes, ready to confront Charlie.

At lunch, I took two aspirin and handed him the notebook wordlessly. We sat in silence as he slowly peered over the pages, absorbing the information behind blank eyes without a single sound. When he reached the final page, he set it down and asked, “Did you write this?”

“Ernie did.”

Charlie sniggered at that and crossed his legs. “Well, he’s onto me, now, isn’t he?”

I stared at him, slack-jawed, feeling duped. “You’re— you’re—“

“What, supernatural? I’d like to think so,” he gave me a mellow look. “Ah… you may want to take another aspirin. Watch this.”

I popped one and I watched. He closed his eyes and snapped his fingers. The lights above us flickered off, then on, then off again, before the lights reignited. Charlie opened his eyes, suddenly breathless, and nodded. “I can’t… usually do it with that much control. It needs work.”

I slammed my hands down on the notebook, my mind barreling at 100 miles per hour with a smattering of questions in tow. “Everything. Tell me everything. Now.”

Charlie folded his hands and gestured to the aspirin. I shook my head and pulled the bottle to my side. He cleared his throat, steadied his gaze, and began. “I wouldn’t call myself willingly supernatural by any means. I did not ask to be this way. I have been tossed through more foster homes in 17 years than I can count on my hands, and I would give anything to give up this life. I hate living a life where I’m unable to control my abilities. I don’t want to hurt others, I don’t want to do this, but sometimes it gets out of hand. Lucky for you,” he said. “Some people will gain immunity once exposed to it long enough.”

“Gain immunity to what?”

“It has a lot of names depending on the universe you’re in. They mostly call it the slender sickness, but you can call it the static sickness, faceless-man-itis, whatever. You do you. Headaches, nausea, hallucinations. Malfunctioning electricity. Static. The whole thing.”

“So it is you.”

“Always has been. Well, not totally. Faceless Man? The Faceless Man, as your brother says, he may or may not have touched my mother with his hand, therefore touching me as well and handing me a degree of abilities that I drag with me. It’s my cross, Esme. I’ve been avoiding his gaze for the past 16 years and have always managed to just be out of his reach, but my powers are getting stronger and it’s all getting more and more out of hand. I needed to go to someone.”

“Does he have a name? An actual one.”

“Many names. The Operator, the Business Man, Chernobog. Apparently, now, the Faceless Man. And I guess he’s my parental figure now. I’ve been chilling with him more often. Crazy dude, gotta say,” Charlie said, putting his hands behind his head and crossing his legs. “Crazy, crazy things.”

I looked at my hands, unsure of what to feel. “Did he kill my cousin?”

Charlie’s face went slack. “He’s killed many, many, people, but I don’t have control over what he does.”

We sat in silence for a long moment until Charlie spoke again. “I’m sorry for your loss.”

My heart began to pound. “Ernie’s after you,” I said, running a hand through my hair and letting it fall over my face. “I think he might try and hurt you.”

“So… movie night is postponed indefinitely, then,” he replied.

I grinned sadly at him. “Don’t make me laugh, this is serious. I don’t want you to be harmed.”

His arms dropped to his side, and he smiled at me. He smiled in a way that drew me back in all over again. “Esme, be here tomorrow. I’ll see you then.”

He vanished back out into the hall. I chose not to follow him. But, for the first time, I had a surprising lack of a headache, and I don’t think it was because of the aspirin. 

That night, I slipped the notebook back into Ernie’s drawer. I think he may have figured it out, though, because when we bumped into each other on the stairs, we stared at each other for a good minute saying nothing. I believe it was my way of telling him which side I was on, because when he surrendered his gaze he slammed the door shut behind him and I heard rummaging in his room. I walked to school the next morning.

When I came to lunch the next day, Charlie was already waiting for me. He handed me a gift bag. “It’s a present,” he said. “For you.”

“What’s the occasion?”

“I’m moving. You might never see me again.”

“Oh, Charlie…”

“I say might. Might. There’s a chance we will meet again. Perhaps in another lifetime or in another universe. We can figure it out, alright? Alright.”

I shared my lunch with him, half a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, and we toasted to his new life with our milk cartons. When we left the library that day, our pinkies were interlocked. As he turned to go to class, I pulled him back, and kissed him on the cheek. “I’ll miss you,” I said. 

He hugged me. It was like hugging one of those plasma balls where your hair stands up when you touch it. I had just stuck my fingers in a socket, but when I pulled back, all I could see were Charlie’s grateful, glowing eyes. “I’ll miss you too. Goodbye, Esme. Goodbye.”

My hair on my arms was still standing up and my cheeks were dark with color. I had a mark on my pinkie from where it touched his.

Since that day, I haven’t seen Charlie Nguyen. Ernie is still doing tests and taking entries though they become more inconsistent and confusing each and every day. I have an idea of who’s altering his readings. The present Charlie gave me, though, might hold some importance for me in the future. It’s a key without something to unlock, a piece of quartz, his copy of Shakespeare’s Hamlet with all his annotations in the margins, and a pair of earrings with ghosts on them. Quartz conducts electricity. I remember learning that in class. I always keep it in my pocket now. When I ask my teachers about him, they seem confused, as do the other students. Ernie and I have seemed to make a silent pact as to not discuss the matters of the supernatural. I think he’s looking for Charlie. He’s looking for anything that will bring him closer to the truth.

I feel farther to the truth than ever before, but I know I cannot be far from it. It’s a matter of time. Ernie has begun to have headaches lately.

[underthewingsofthblackeagle]

The Murderess from the Grunewald (17): “Secret Whitsun Holidays on Rügen (7): Sharing Joy and Sorrow (5)”

(”Trauer” by Free-Photos)

Previously

3:00 am Sunday morning of Whitsun weekend 2020, two days after Claire's release from prison

        Jamie found it hard to fall asleep. He missed Claire next to him. But at some point exhaustion and sleep overwhelmed him. He slept peacefully, dreaming of wooded cliffs and white beaches until a blood-curdling scream tore him from his dreams.

"Claire!"

        His cry of her name - a seemingly automatic response to her cry of fear - rang through the dark cottage. The moment he switched on the bedside lamp with one hand, he threw off the coverlet with the other one. Then he hurried on in the direction of Claire's room. He almost stumbled over the sleepy and utterly surprised Bismarck lying on the small rug in front of his bed.

        In the light of the bedside lamp, he saw Claire sitting on the edge of her bed. She held onto the frame of it with both hands. Her face was pale. Drops of sweat beaded from her forehead and she looked exhausted, even scared.

        "Claire! What happened?"

        Carefully he sat down beside her and put an arm around her trembling body. She slipped into his embrace and put her head against his chest, utterly exhausted.

        "Nothing, Jamie. Nothing ... really bad. It was ...," she breathed in slowly and deeply," ... it was ... nothing but a bad dream."

        They sat side by side for several minutes, and Jamie felt herself settling down. When her breathing returned to nearly normal, he asked:

        "What did you dream of, Claire? What scared you so much? "

        She was silent for a moment. Then answered softly:

        "Since the death of Frank ... I dream ... every night of it ... how I ... found him. His pale face ... all the blood ... Oh, Jamie, all the blood! ... And then it's like ... as if it happens all over again ... how I try to keep him alive ... but all I do is ... pointless, ... meaningless. As I rush to the phone and call the ambulance. The policemen are coming ... I see my bloodied hands and the thought hits me what a failure I am. I couldn’t save him. I wasn’t a good wife for him .... all these years … I couldn’t give him the children he longed for ... and when he needed me the most ... when he was fighting for his life  ... I wasn’t able to save him. My whole life with him was ... one big failure. I let him down, I failed him so much."

        "Since his death? Every night?" Jamie asked horrified.

        "Yes, ... every night," she answered wearily.

        Claire began to cry quietly and inside of Jamie’s soul rose a wave of enormous anger, which he could only hold back with difficulty. Even beyond his death, this monster managed to provoke guilt in the woman he loved. Even now and after she was cleared of all charges, this narcissist was overshadowing her soul. Jamie knew that these feelings would not change overnight. But he also knew that he would not leave her alone that night. He gently started stroking her arm with his right hand.

        "Can we go?"

        "Go? Where?"        

        "Over there, in my room."

        "But …?"

        "I will not leave you alone in this state, Claire."

        The tone of his voice was serious and allowed no argument. She nodded and before she could get up, he had taken her in his arms and carried her to the opposite room. There he carefully placed her on the unused side of the bed.

        "Come, cover yourself so you don’t get cold. I'm going to pick you something to drink. Water or tea?"

        "Do we have chamomile tea?" Claire asked as she slipped under the covers.

        "For sure. I'll be right back."

”Über dem Bett” by Arcaion

        Jamie disappeared with Bismarck in tow. Claire sat with her back against the wall of the bed and pulled her knees up to her chest. Suddenly Adso appeared in the room. He had jumped out of bed when Claire started screaming and had taken refuge under a dresser. Now he looked around carefully and when everything seemed safe, he jumped onto the bed.

        "Come on, honey," Claire said, tapping with her hand on the seat to her right. Adso followed, sat down and let himself be cuddled. A few minutes later, Jamie appeared with a tray holding a large cup of tea and a small plate of biscuits.

        "Here, have a drink and take a biscuit. A little bit of sugar will boost your serotonin level," he said smiling as he placed the cup and plate on the bedside table by her side.

        "Thank you."

        "Gladly. I go and turn off the light in your room."

        Claire nodded. Then she realized that her biscuits were in danger.

        "Don’t, Adso! Sugar isn’t good for your health!"

        When Adso made no effort to give her words a hearing, let alone obedience, she unceremoniously took the cat and put him on the other side. Then she took a few gulps of the still hot tea.

        "This cat is a nuisance, at least when it comes to something edible," she said as Jamie returned to the room.

        "That's right," he answered with a serious expression, adding:

        "Adso is as effective as the biblical locust plague that devoured Egypt. Only that he doesn’t ruin any wheat fields, but the balance of your bank account. We should call him the fur locust."

        Claire, who had finished her tea, had to pull herself together so as not to cough up the liquid she had just taken. Then she put the cup on the bedside table.

         Jamie took her free hand and kissed it.

         "It's good to see you smiling again."

         She moved her hand to his cheek and tenderly stroked it with her thumb.

         "Yesterday night ... I even slept through."

         "I know," he replied, kissing her hand again.

         "It was the first time ... in ... many ... months."

         "I know and that's why I do not want you to sleep alone in the future," he whispered.

         She looked at him in astonishment.

         "But ... but will that not ...."

         "Become difficult? I admit it will not be easy. But I can stand that. What I can not stand is seeing you suffer, Claire."        

         Tears welled up in her eyes. With the hand still holding his cheek, she pulled him slowly to her lips until they touched. When they parted, he looked at her for a moment. Then he asked smiling:

         "Was anything easy in the last six months?"        

         "No," she whispered.        

         "And yet we have survived! Not only have we survived all the difficulties, but we’ve also won! Why shouldn’t we succeed now or in the future?"        

         Claire nodded.       

         "We should try to get some sleep. If we want to explore the island during the day, we need our strength. Good night, Claire."        

         Jamie kissed her hand the last time, then turned and switched off the light.        

         "Good night, Jamie."        

         Claire also turned around. She put Adso on the bedside rug and turned off the bedside lamp. She knew that at some point the cat would jump on the bed again and probably make itself comfortable at her feet. But for now, she had only one wish - to stretch again and then fall asleep as soon as possible.

“Mann” by Free-Photos

         For a long time, Jamie paid attention to the sounds coming from Claire's side. Her breathing had been somewhat normalized, but her movements were a testimony to the inner turmoil that had been flushed to the surface in her dreams. When she finally seemed to sleep peacefully, he was able to relax also.

        While he lay awake, he thought about her words. If she had really dreamed of that bloody crime scene night after night in the past fourteen months - and there was no reason not to believe her - were there other things that tormented her soul? Much more important than such details, yet, seemed to him the question of how he could help her. For a few semesters, he had attended lectures in legal and criminal psychology as a guest student. But that was at least a decade ago - years before that subject became a separate course of study. No, this knowledge wouldn’t help him to help Claire. But was she ready to accept professional help? Something told him that it was not the right time to ask her about it. He would have to start small. It had been intuitively clear to him at their first meeting in the State Criminal Police Office that this whole thing was not a 100-meter sprint but a marathon. However, after his talks with Claire in prison, and especially after hearing her detailed account of her life with Randall, he realized that the term marathon was inadequate. If he judged it correctly, then he had to prepare for nothing but an Ironman. But he was ready to go all the way for her.

        One first step could be to balance the heaviness that lay on her soul with lightness and joy. Maybe the trip during the day would distract her and help her to relax. Jamie had planned some things that he thought would give her joy. But he would ask her first. He was eager to give her the opportunity to choose for herself what she wanted to do or to see. Besides, Jamie pursued another idea, with which he hoped to provide a kind of inner relief and relaxation. But it was too early to talk about that too. He would have to wait until the right moment.

“Bett” by Dibjo

        The first rays of the new morning were almost an hour old when Claire awoke. She lay on her stomach and heard a soft purr. Shortly after, she felt Adso lolling under her left arm. She gave him a gentle push and muttered:

        "Out with you, you burdock!"

        The cat landed on all fours on the bedside rug. Claire turned and hoped to find some rest. But at that very moment, she was suddenly catapulted into reality by the raw and wet tongue of a dachshund that left a damp trail all over her face.

         "Ihhhgitt!”

        When she looked up startled, she saw an enthusiastic Bismarck, who had apparently been waiting for one of the two human beings to come back to life. Jamie, his owner, was lying on his back, still deep in the Land of Smiles, his right arm buried under Claire's pillow.

         "Dr. Fraser!" she said in a loud voice that would have honored the commanding tone of every Prussian parade ground.

         Jamie slowly opened his sleepy eyes and looked at her.

         "Good morning, Dr. Beauchamp."

         "Dr. Fraser! Nice to see you have come back to the land of the living."

         Claire's voice was quieter, but still very decisive.

         "Yes, Dr. Beauchamp?"

         "Should we ever share a marriage bed ..."

         Jamie's eyes widened and in an instant, he was completely awake,

         "Yeah, Dr. Beauchamp? I hear?" he asked expectantly, straightening up.

         "If we ever share a marriage bed, then I want a marriage contract ...before we get married!"

         "A marriage contract ..."        

         "Yes! It needs to contain only one paragraph. "        

         "And what kind of paragraph would that be?"        

         "No animals are allowed in the marriage bed!"        

         Jamie grinned all over his face.        

         "With that," he said, "I completely agree, Dr. Beauchamp."        

         Claire looked at him in surprise.        

         "It's not a problem for me," he said with a smile, nodding affirmatively.                  "You agree?" She asked in disbelief.        

         "Sure! I don’t want to have any cats in my marriage bed, Claire."        

         "I said animals, Jamie. Animals. Plural."        

         "Yes, no cats - plural - in the marriage bed."        

         "Not only cats, Dr. Fraser, but all animals."        

         "As I said, no problem, Dr. Beauchamp."        

         "You have no problem damning Bismarck out of bed?" she asked in surprise. Jamie sat cross-legged in front of her and had taken the dog in his arms. Now he began to scratch Bismarck behind the ears.      

         "Bismarck? Oh, there must have been a mistake, Dr. Beauchamp. Bismarck is a dachshund."        

         "An animal! And that does mean he's not allowed in a marriage bed. If there ever is ... "       

         "Dr. Beauchamp, this must be a misunderstanding. Dachshunds are no animals. Dachshunds are little miracles we do not deserve. And if we handle them properly, they will become the second chamber of our heart. How am I supposed to be able to sleep without my heart?"       

         As he said so, he caressed the dog’s head and grinned.       

         "Jamie! You ... you ... damn ... lawyer!"        

         Claire turned on her side and pulled the covers over her head to hide her grin. Jamie sighed. Then he turned to the dog he was still cuddling:        

         "Have you heard, Bismarck? I really tried everything. But this judge is relentless. I have to banish you. But do not worry about my heart, I'm going to apologize every day with a piece of meat. "        

         Before he knew it, Claire's pillow flew towards him and hit him on the head.

         "Uff! Come on, Bismarck, I think we better leave now."        

         He put the dog on the rug and got out of bed. Arriving at Claire's side, he flipped the blanket over her head and quickly gave her a kiss on the forehead.              "I'll take a shower and then I'll make breakfast for us and the fur monsters," he announced.        

         "Coffee! I need a strong coffee!" muttered a voice from under the covers.        

         "Sure," he mumbled back as he left the room, smiling.