#feel free to recommend things i dont know what im even looking for

[televenus]

it grows

[darlinguistics]

'its just IMPOSSIBLE to not be addicted to your phone nowadays its UNREALISTIC-'

heres some advice to being less chronically online. for gen z (and younger??) who dont even know how to start thinking about it and have only heard shitty advice from older adults who just genuinely do not get it, from a fellow gen z and my experiences so far.

*these are personal and may not all 100% resonate but its still good prompting to start thinking about things! PLEASE feel free to add your own stories/advice in the notes! support your fellow humans, dont gatekeep what youve learned, lets have these conversations! and no negativity/pessimism please <3

first thing is to make it a less scary thought, a more concrete idea and not a hypothetical. it doesnt have to be all-or-nothing, cold turkey, a huge announcement and a fundamental shift in your personality. the internet will be in your life for the rest of your life, this is an ongoing relationship you are trying to make healthier thats all! and it takes one step at a time and some self-compassion, but a true effort nonetheless. 'dont you think thats a bit too serious-' if youre my age you quite literally grew up and developed online, it is literally part of your psyche the way your childhood is, it IS serious, you deserve to treat it seriously.

dont save your login info/dont stay logged in for social media accounts, having to manually log in when you want to go on like youre on some elementary school chrome book is a really healthy and clear boundary to have between being logged off and logged on.

-> bigger challenge - uninstall it on your phone in general, only log on on your laptop/pc if applicable for you!

if youre motivated to, try to work on your posture too. i only say that because most of our bad posture is at least partially related to being on our phones a lot, and when i started wanting to fix my posture, completely separately and unrelated from trying to break my phone addiction, it made it easier to lose interest in my phone since i didnt want to ruin my progress with my posture. it made me start to have a mindset like 'well if you cant do this on your phone with good posture then dont do it' and 'if youre on your phone so long your posture starts to cave in, youve probably spent too long on your phone anyway'

listen to music more. its easier for me to kinda write off my phone and do other things if i just open music or a podcast or long youtube video on it. i know we all love long video essays, but i recommend music more specifically for me at least because im less inclined to pause music or scroll while listening to it for some reason? whereas using a show or video or podcast for white noise, im way more likely to also be scrolling on my phone and that is my activity lol. music for some reason i dont want to interrupt and instead of being on my phone i can clean or do something productive on my computer etc

this one is sooo hard but try to fall asleep with some distance between you and your phone, even just a couple feet. mine stays on the desk next to my bed which isnt that far but its better than on bed like it used to be. when you wake up you probably wont feel like reaching for it right away if its far and even better if you have to get up for it because then at least you stand and move your body first thing instead of looking at your phone first thing. and try to get more and more of your morning routine done before touching your phone over time.

-> for me, i started by just trying to at least wake up a bit in bed before touching it, then stand up before touching it, then stand and stretch, then going to the bathroom first, making coffee first, feeding the cat first, etc. its surprisingly helpful to have a specific chore/task in mind that is The requirement so that everytime you do it you get a lil dopamine rush for unlocking your phone from yourself lmao. when the weather was nice i used to make my Requirement being outside first before going on it and i LOVED that. esp as it got easier and i started doing more and more before going on it and finally walking outside with coffee and my phone felt like such a pleasant little reward.

find a hobby that uses your hands. example: i really need to get back into knitting because when i did it regularly so much time that wouldve been on my phone was spent knitting with music/podcasts/shows/(even online lectures! when i felt productive lol) playing. its the same amount of physical relaxing - barely moving lol - but uses a longer attention span and a much better dopamine hit than scrolling, i literally MADE things.

-> you might be thinking, 'but mindless knitting isnt better than mindless scrolling is it?' but that mindless feeling on your phone is just that, mindless. the mindless feeling you get when doing something like knitting is actually closer to a flow state, which is actually incredibly good for you, like a fulfilling nutritious meal as opposed to 'empty calories' or whatever

get a widget for your homescreen that shows your screen time. i have one and of course it doesnt always stop me but seeing that time go up all day the more i use it and the pride of keeping it low is really helpful

practice grounding. in general.

spend more time on anonymous activities and have more privacy and less attachment with your 'persona' - what i mean by that is, i consider things like scrolling through tumblr (for me personally!) to be relatively harmless because i dont try to like,, brand myself here. if youre a tumblr regular you know the jokes - 0 follows, 0 notes, screaming to the void, moots you dont talk to, blorbo pfp and urls, fake names everywhere, and we're having fun! basically targeting the 'everyone is famous now' thing with this one - embrace being a nobody with no personal stakes here

-> personally ive never kept up with having social media accounts that are actually just, me irl - like a facebook or main instagram, like a locals account yknow? but i think it goes for that too - stop spending so much time trying to further personalize your online presence in the hopes of it representing you perfectly - because it never will, and it shouldnt, and you shouldnt aspire for that. your social media presence is lighthearted and incredibly surface-level, treat it like that! thats not me bashing social media either, having that mindset will make it more enjoyable bc youll be using it as it should be used!

do following/followers or camera roll/files or app purges. this is also a soft launch type of way to practice easing into a better mindset. aside from just literally getting rid of junk, the process of trying to judge whether or not you need something is good practice in mindfulness! even if you dont delete everything you feel like you maybe should, thats fine, youll do other purges in the future too. eventually youll get better at parting with things and realizing when things that feel good in a moment are actually bad for you. and it forces you to regularly check in on your more long-lasting parasocial relationships online and how theyre serving you or not

speaking of parasocial - for actual friends, if theyre irl, think about how much you interact with them online vs in person and why you think that is and how it affects you. maybe youll wanna see them more irl if possible (i promise its better for your friendship), maybe youll realize you dont need to keep tabs on them anymore (old high school acquaintances lookin at you). for celebrities and fandom things - try to think about the bare minimum content from them you could do with. you dont have to unstan all your faves and stop enjoying things - but do you need their notifications on? if you have designated fan accounts, are they still a source of joy or of stress? do you need them on all the platforms or just one or two? do you need to have all that saved content of them? are there aspects of this that you love that could be found elsewhere, maybe even offline? (again you dont have to stay one way forever, just encouraging checking in with yourself!)

if youre of the genre of online where you just cant help yourself from getting involved in big discussions or discourse and arguments - i recommend journaling when you get upset by something online, articulating your feelings without the idea of someone ever reading it and without the goal of 'winning' or being the most correct and logical or even the most sympathetic and morally good. take away every audience aspect of it. what is this really about for you, and why would strangers online deserve to hear your personal well-thought out opinions? why would your thoughts deserve to be simplified and misconstrued and underappreciated the way they would be in this discussion? is there even an outcome to this where you feel truly satisfied? are their people who are more worthy of hearing your thoughts who arent part of this audience? is this a conversation that is best held online where so much communicative nuance is inevitably sacrificed?

in the end these are all just practices in remembering how in control you are. and that goes for if any of these are scary or too difficult sounding too! these all become less scary if you remember that as soon as anything becomes too uncomfortable or painful, you have all the power to stop doing it, make a change, and try again later. so much of advice for quitting bad habits can be intimidating because the pressure and the shame that would come from failing scares you out of the possible benefits of trying - just go ahead and kill that shame from the jump. of course youre going to fail! you are going to have setbacks! thats part of it! you have agency in this, always. the internet is not inherently or completely evil nor good. build trust in yourself to make the calls on when it is serving you and when it isnt on a case-by-case basis, and then give yourself permission to learn through trial and error.

and remember you are worth all of this effort. i believe in us <3

[boxheadpaint]

the problem with my last post on the subject was listing a bunch of pieces i already knew and not being specific enough to say 'im looking for something of similar feeling but lesser known'.

im specifically looking for unique "analog" or just video youtube horror that i Havent already heard of. something that doesnt rely exclusively on creepy photoshop face and text to speech voice with the same general idea as any other series. if you know something thats quite good and interesting but you dont see as many people talking about thats the recommendation im looking for

morley grove - from the creator of gemini, incredibly strong. plays with older internet, older youtube and geocities type of personal websites. things that dont jump you right out the blue but continuously build dread. things that are hidden even, implied to be something much worse than you can understand and allowing your mind to run wild. very good, but on hold Along with gemini due to the creators computer problems.

1990s lost media: obscure security system - only one video at the current time sadly, as it is a very good video. plays out plainly like a windows movie maker piece, and once again its only showing you a Part of whats happening. theres startling noises, but not without proper buildup or reason. again strange implications that make you actually Think about whats going on. funnily enough, actually had a nightmare based on this one after watching it. Extremely well done

countess pasta - moreso original writing and readings as opposed to visual storytelling. if you were ever into thelittlefears and still yearn for something that captures that same feeling, take a listen to countess pasta's videos. there also seems to be some kind of overarching plot that could tie the stories together, but even listening to them on their own is a treat. her selection of work is impeccable and anxiety-inducing, well thought-out and refreshing in the current climate of creepypasta readings

Minecraft alpha 1.0.16 versions - hard to describe, more mystery than horror but still unnerving. INCREDIBLY beautifully done and written. teases with the idea that things haunting your minecraft world may not be supernatural or truly sinister in nature, yet still a glimpse into a stranger world seemingly lost to time. remembered this one at the last second

if theres any other videos or series you feel arent discussed as widely as some others, something obscure and slash or of great quality, feel free to put it directly in my eyes

[samthecookielord]

Hi I'm a huge fan of byto and also just via following you have seen lots of posts about this puyo game. If I wanted to get into it which one would you recommend I start with I was admittedly a little confused looking up the name

Ty!!! And hoo boy thats a difficult question to answer because the first one highly depends on what intrigues you most!

All the games are fine standalone even if some are direct sequels to others because puyo game stories tend to be self contained and theyll do some re-explaining anyways each time.

ok prepare for a mildly long post i'll do my best to explain things !!

My first puyo game was Puyo Puyo Tetris, and I think it's a pretty fine and dandy start! It's available on various consoles and steam, and if youre struggling with puyo, you can rely a little more on tetris to get through levels! (they DO have a skip level button if you get stuck at any point though and just want to see the story! :D )

Or if you want to get the game with more gameplay options first, you can check out Puyo Puyo Tetris 2 (also on various consoles and steam!)

Characters have amnesia about PPT1 so you dont need to have seen it before playing this one, but if you do wanna go the "buy ppt2 first" route and still want to know what happened in PPT1, there's a compilation of all ppt1 cutscenes here! (and while im here, cutscene compilation for puyo puyo tetris 2 here as well)

But if its the lively side characters and interactions that interest you more, I think there are other games that will give you more of that! Don't get me wrong, puyo puyo tetris is a wonderful blast of fun character interactions!! But it doesnt really spend as much time with the wacky side characters since they're focused on the main big plot/characters.

If you want to get to know some of the cast before hopping in, I think Puyo Puyo 20th Anniversary is a fun start too! Each character has a dedicated storyline of 8 levels, plenty of time to get to know their flavour of weirdoness! If you're interested in emulating, Precise Museum has a translation patch for the game here! There is also this other fan translation youtube playlist here (but a few videos seem to have gone missing).

I hope this helps! Feel free to ask again for more elaboration! Here's a puyo nexus page with all puyo games if you want to look more into any of the games i mentioned here!

[to-my-emil]

luca's 2024 letter

so i did a whole analysis/explanation/infodump about luca's newest letter on my discord server and. figured i may as well post it here! theres a lot of fun tasty things in here and some confirmation of things that have been implied in previous letters which is fun to look at. please keep in mind i dont have the entirety of every character and manor game's lore memorized so while i did double check some things i mightve missed some stuff. anyway its all below the cut since its Long have fun :)

(also feel free to chime in with any thoughts/feelings/opinions/ideas!)

so theres three sections to this letter! im gonna go section by section, but some parts of the last section are mentioned earlier so uh. sorry if you havent read it yet (id recommend u do read it first)

so part 1 is pretty fun. luca is confirmed to have survived game 10 (which also features tracy, charles, and bonbon though we dont currently know who the fourth survivor participant is) And its implied that hes the only survivor of the game (according to the "fleeting victory" thats the assumption at least). his traits w being able to connect the ciphers is also officially tied into the lore here; there are in fact wires running underneath each arena (or at the very least whichever arena lucas game was in which we dont know yet iirc) so its canon that he can do what he does in matches and its not something that the detective incorrectly deduced lorewise (idk if any of the survivor abilities are Actually incorrect deductions/not actually things that theyre doing (like for example priestess's portals, etc that seem more far-fetched) but since we know hes done other things incorrectly (like "prisoner" and "psychologist" titles being in quotes/technically wrong) i figure he mightve gotten some of those wrong too). luca is also Super Fucked Up w an unusuable left arm (and his previous injuries which we know includes at Least severe brain trauma but likely physical trauma too considering his time in prison + the leg braces) so uhhhhhhhhhhh. my money is NOT on him for the next game.

which is the fun next thing to talk about: baron deross is making him do another game!! this confirms whats implied in emmas 2022 letter (she writes "I've won the previous round, for now" which implies a second round if not more), and probably means that helena and galatea would also go through another round even though its not confirmed yet. so far we dont have a record of what happens in any second manor game for a player who has won (as far as i remember); usually what happens is entire groups are eliminated before the game and the only survivor goes on to the next round to try again by default rather than having won the game (like murro and luchino). so far luca's second game is the only one we have ANY info about for a survivor whos won their first game; we know that alva is in it and its heavily implied ann is in it (we'll get to this later) so we'll likely find out what happens once we get either of their experiment letters. its also interesting that the baron seems to reveal more information about the experiments to luca after luca won his game, but its hard to know whether thats because luca is also a scientist or if he reveals that to everyone who wins. my guess is maybe the former bc u Know luca would have questions and theres also no mention of baron deross saying anything like that in emmas, galateas, or helenas letters.

on to section 2!!! (there was a slur against disabled people in the last line of this section so. thats whats blocked out)

OKAY SO. definitely confirmed that hes in a second manor game, its not even subtext its just right there. assuming the "mechanisms" refer to the same mechanisms that are running under the arena and connecting the cipher machines my guess is that this is what he used to shock other participants?? rather than just being to conduct electricity through himself like he does in the game?? idk thats just spaghetti at the wall its not clear here how he actually got shocked and why. it Is clear that he passed the fuck out at some point or another/his memory issues have gotten worse and the wiki points to that guy in his dream being hermann, so that's. interesting. theres an implication here that luca and hermann used to be closer, but once luca started w physics hermann went mmmm time to stop being a father. which. checks out knowing hermann. whats even more interesting is that luca calls hermanns ideas "ludicrous fantasies" that are neither idealistic nor realistic, because like luca you went and did THE EXACT SAME THING. BRO HE WORKED ON PERPETUAL MOTION. YOURE WORKING ON PERPETUAL MOTION. IM SORRY YOU CANT CLOWN ON UR DAD FOR RUINING HIS LIFE OVER PERPETUAL MOTION WHEN U DID LITERALLY THE EXACT SAME THING

anyway.

i do wonder if this is meant to imply that hermann was in fact actually working on a More ridiculous version of perpetual motion or if luca is just biased as hell against hermann. im banking on the latter there is no way in hell that luca is a reliable narrator considering all his memory issues + his general tendency to outright grab people hes mad at by the throat (<- fun fact we see this at least twice once in alvas backstory video and again in gattos backstory video. luca is the same across all timelines). also implications that hermann became an alcoholic. im guessing as a kid luca was told it was medicine and he hasnt put the pieces together?? or its ironic. idk could be either with him. i highly doubt its actually medicine. ALTHOUGH. theres an alternate explanation here; when luca says "swallow them down" i initially thought he was referring to hiding his "final feelings", since sometimes swallowing down feelings is a phrase used for that kind of thing. but potentially this could be implying that hermann had luca take some kind of medicine potentially to get rid of those feelings in some way?? personally i think its the former because we already know hermann was wasting his life and money so becoming an alcoholic would be an easy answer, but this is probably just because i dont have any answers if it were the latter. something to think about

now the third part, which gives us info about the next manor game!

so first the "gaunt old man" is (according to the wiki which i agree with in this case) mad eyes, which makes sense because mad eyes was involved in game 8/9 right before this and game 10 was filled with inventors + bonbon so it only makes sense he was there. no idea where he went though. whats more fun is that luca is now In The Fucking basement Walls where mad eyes used to be bc luca doesnt trust the rest of the participants. considering the "abnormal eyes" and that alva is here we know for sure that this is those related to the eye of darkness cult, which means ann is also definitely there. whats even more interesting is that this implies the existence of at least one more member of the eye of darkness cult whos going to be in this game; luca says "new participants" and "these people", and considering how specific the letters usually are with other things i would guess hed say "those two" if it were only ann and alva (of course its possible that theyre the only two have arrived at the writing of this journal, but considering he refers to a ritual coming up soon my money is on all the participants being of the cat cult except luca). luca makes a good note that this new game is likely the opposite of the previous and more focused on religion/spirituality which checks out w the participants, but DAMN hes an asshole about their writing style LMAO. sorry luca not everyone can have the same notes u do

the "brother in faith" guy here is alva, and i personally believe that he can in fact believe see through walls just bc thats funny as hell. just kidding its likely because luca is not as subtle he thinks he is because alva Literally Knows Him. other people might not be able to know hes there but like. that guys also a scientist. hed be able to figure out that theres someone in the walls AND he does in fact know luca. its difficult to tell bc of lucas memory issues but this probably also implies that alva looks very different from how he did in life (i doubt its as tall/etc as in his hunter form since thats what they all see when drugged not what he Actually looks like but im sure theres some stuff like his shorter hair/grayish skin/etc that carries across). i for one am fucking thrilled that theyre in a game together bc oh my god this is a time bomb and im just waiting to watch it explode (again).

as for the last line about a ritual... teehee. im very excited for whatever this is going to be and its killing me that this is the Only Information we have on it so far. likely we're going to have to wait for more alva and ann letters on this one, as well as whoever the third eye of darkness cult member is going to be, but i have no doubt that we'll have some more info eventually. if i had to take a guess its going to heavily affect how game 10-2/11 turns out; i highly doubt any ritual goes on without a sacrifice, and, well... theres only one guy here whos not already part of the cult. things are not looking great for lucas future.

[vee-lociraptor]

@james-spooky had to get out my laptop for this one /pos. im so sorry if you notice the pattern where several of these are indeed written by my mutuals. my mutuals are really good writers i cannot help this. i will not be tagging any of them because im about to be so cringe on main about their work. under the cut because i accidentally rambled

SupposedToBeWriting on ao3 (organchordsandlightning on tumblr) is really good!! she has a very good characterization of both john and arthur (from what i know she usually portrays them platonically) and she describes things beautifully :) i hear really good things about her writing in general but in particular i have bookmarked - A Light in the Dark (set in s1, coma arthur) - alike and together (spoilers for part 29, very much love this one) - The Alleyway Monster (set vaguely part 6) - A Body Divided (crossover with the monstrous agonies podcast, which i do not know, but very silly and i enjoy it)

WordsINeedToGetOut on ao3 (gayghostrights on tumblr) also has great depictions of arthur and john and writes them more as like. not romantic not platonic not qpr but a secret fourth thing. very fun to read. they have some good sfw fic but if nsfw isnt your thing (and it very much is. not mine) mind their tags. - i specifically follow their "a family found and made" series it's. so nice. it's post canon but an au of sorts so there's not really spoilers - what does and does not fit (post-part 43 john doe poem im Very Normal about (i met him because i was being feral about it)) - again. please mind his tags.

dearcaspian on ao3 (lighthouseshepard on tumblr) is an absolutely phenomenal writer and i am not biased about this at all. please trust. in all seriousness his prose reads like poetry it's so nice to get to read it every time. i know waltz already recommended it but take it as peer review because no sweeter innocence is mind altering. i read all like 28,000 words of it at the time in one go at two in the morning kind of mind altering. (visibly shaking) it's. really good - other than that they write really good separate bodies jarthur fic that makes me feral - i dont even have specific recommendations all of it makes me sick. go forth. some of it is on his tumblr go get it. - i LIED a kind of quiet holy makes me more sick than a lot of the rest of it. call me touch starved if you want but i will say that on main

safe_ship_habored on ao3 (izel-scribbles on tumblr) only has a few works and mostly writes dollins at this point but they're really good! i think they've posted some exclusively on tumblr? can't think of anything specific right now but ik i've read the most toothaching john and arthur fluff /pos from them

i don't want to talk about this one. lea's going to see it. im going to do it anyway because it is my favorite malevolent fic and i feel you should know about it. there is a fic and it's on tumblr and it's called when the land was godless and free. it is by percymawce-arts and ananxiousgenz on tumblr. i am insane about it. it is a cowboy au and it is somewhat suggestive (moaning making out sort of thing) but the prose is so so good. the characterization and the way they translate malev characters into a western cowboy setting is phenomenal. it has catholic guilt in it. it has yearning. it's romantic jarthur and if it's not your thing i get it but percy and lea both really cooked on this one. i know i've posted about it on tumblr before. i am so aware that one of the authors is my mutual now lea don't look.

i am rambling so hard right now i have more. im not even done. im so sorry - styrofoamdoor (ao3 and tumblr) has a noel character study on their ao3 account and it's so good and i am thinking about it always. it's set post-episode 40. - ETA, never change by green_tea_and_honey SO silly and goofy and yet. also serious somehow. au where arthur has a phone and john messes around with it - come, wayward souls is also by green_tea_and_honey and i havent read it yet but it IS an over the garden wall crossover and i love that show so much - kiss me better is the only work i've read by SeerOfTime but i hear really good things about their malevolent fic so i will definitely be checking them out in the future

[kamiliora]

Too people who want to get "prettier" and have a "glow up" Do NOT expect it to go over night.

Plenty of people believed that you just become pretty with no effort like you see on TV. It's never that easy. It takes steps, processes and Discipline. Always start with the basics like :

Hygeine

Make a skincare routine for your skin

Know your skin type and build you skincare routine from there

body care for the entire body

Scrubs , lotions and body butters are a must

Exfoliate 1-2 times a week

haircare (hair is everything even if u have a hijab hair care is still possible)

Oil train your hair and know you hair porosity to know what products to use

Use a non sulphate or silicon shampoo

Conditioner and a hair oil of your choice based on your hair problem

Hair mask 1 times a week

Know ur hair pattern to be able to use the right products and not damage your hair pattern

Do not straighten your hair everyday!!!

Use Silk pillows and silk scrunchies instead of elastics!!!

Getting a closet and hair cut for you

Find your best colors and body type

Therefore you would know which colors make you shine the most as well as

Find your seasonal color and which fraction ur in (like winter bright , summer light and etc)

Find which type of hair cuts and bangs suit your facial featured and face shape most

I recommend looksmaxing or the Yt channel Dear Peachie to help you including makeup tutorials, which archetype you are and which closet you can do

Look for styles that match your personality and makes you stand out

Build up a hobby

like sports photography, drawing, crocheting, dancing, and etc.

Doesn't have to be time consuming just something to do when ur bored or free even

Also depends on your time to be careful on what you commit to

Try to explore more options without much costs before fully committing to something that isn't for long-term

Exercise ( unless you already do)

Exercise requires discipline for you to be able to do it continuously for progress

If you can't afford a premium membership take a walk/jog/run around the block,street,park

If you feel unsafe you can do a YouTube work outs as they are effective depending on your goal

I recommend channels like :Madfit ,Hinafit, Shirley kim, April Han, ema wong, and Chloe ting

Take time for yourself (not all the time)

If you dont have time for yourself your body and brain will get stressed (from experience)

It can be as simple as drinking your daily detox water, green juice, coffee, tea or reading a book

Get 8 hours of sleep

Make sure not to stress for something so complete a task when given no matter how far the deadline is!!!

Reduce screen time to 3 hours a day (outside of school/work related stuff)

Diet

Never go too extreme like you see those people online do

Unless you are talking to professionals such as dieticians, Nutritionists and etc. (Bc most public figures do have professionals that they seek help too for these types of situations)

stick to a healthy diet like the 80/20 method

Or you can also do keto/greek/high carb or protein just never go extreme as it will slow down your metabolism

Find who you really are and trying to be better

People never really open up to try different things you should try more to find what you like most or which you are most stable with

See the perspectives on how you act im different situations and see what your mistakes are to try to avoid doing them again

Fix your mentality (watch wizard Liz, Song Jia,) and read quotes to inspire you to do better and the most you can

Always Analyze the situation before commenting or doing action unless its an emergency

Do not let people decide for you or get to your head it is their opinion not yours. You opinion is never invalid and justified in your perspective

Confident vs Arrogant vs Egoistic

Confident people never brag nor do they drag people down. They know they are THAT person and will NOT care about your opinion of them.

Arrogant people like to Brag about something that they have and thinks their all That. They bring down people for not having the luxury they have. But when someone has more and better than them they always try to avoid them, argue with them or get annoyed by them as They want to show supremacy

Egoistic people tend to make fun of people. Self-centered people that only think about themselves without knowing or thinking that they hurt others. Their too preoccupied with themselves to think of others helps or needs

(Sorry its so long and unorganized I made this at 2:30 am bc idk and these are just some tips)

[lemongogo]

what's your process for coloring like? the look of that elendira is so textured and interesting, i can't figure out how you do it

AA THANK YOUU ^__^ !! textures & brushwork are my favorite things abt my art, so im happy you find it interesting hehe . its SOO cool to look at & so much fun to draw imo

i prefer to color by building in layers , if that makes sense 🤔!! hundreds of them !! such that i'm always drawing on Top of previous layers, working from big & messy blocks of color to, eventually, small and refined blocks of color until it feels processed enough. as a result, i rarely ever erase (!!) and i rarely ever draw lineart aside from the initial sketch

a rough, patchy textured brush is key here, as it'll give you dimension and variability w/ your colors. i recommend "Brush and various sets of fountain pen style (万年筆風ブラシと色々セット)" on Clip Studio (ID: 1679706) !! :3

im terrible with explanations though, so i'm going to show a step by step of that elendira drawing if you dont mind :3

sketch layer !! because i mostly render through color alone, i try to make this as close to the finished thing as possible . ^__^ i hateee drawing the same thing over and over and like the expressivity and movement of my sketches anyways , so the more i can preserve at this step, the better. if u were to look at a side by side of my sketches and finished pieces, youd notice a lot of those og lines are present in the final drawing :3

2. flats !! pretty self explanatory, but the solid background gives me an idea of where the figure begins & ends while the colors themselves help distinguish whats what . i stick to ambient lighting @ this point because im usually not sure what i want to do with the overall palette or lighting yet . having two tones (ex, dark and light in her hair or dark and light on her skin) can also help in identifying key features early on that u wanna preserve. as you build layer by layer, sometimes these areas will remain untouched and i think it makes for a rly lovely feel at the end

3. start blocking !!! to be totally honest with you, i dont really know what i do here HAHAHA. like i just scribble the shit out of it, usually focusing on what i might want to do with lighting (ex: grey areas to accentuate folds in her costume). i think i like to start "erasing" the sketch where possible by coloring on top of it .. like if you look at her hat or her arm , you can tell i'm starting to get a sense of the shapes i like vs the ones i dont. it's at this point that the final image starts to emerge in my mind , like im gradually pulling her from a tarpit of scribbles until shes recognizable lol. chipping away at the marble until i can free her. tbh.

4. keep blockingg...when u think u are done , block some more . as you can probably see, the brushwork becomes more intentional as i add more shape, with specific focus on line weight. this is also where the patchiness of that textured brush comes in - notice how none of the colors seem totally uniform (ex: the red cross or the original sketchlines for her waist). you can see bits and pieces of the layers underneath pushing through and i really like that !! ^__^ its very fun and sketchy to me, so i try to keep them around. those areas are also great to colorpick from, because it'll give you "new" colors to work w/ that are already part of your palette.

5. GRADIENTS & GRADIENT MAPS !! TONE CURVE !! COLOR PICKER !! this is the best stage tbh. flatten your image so its all on one layer and just go crazy with all the color settings in ur program. add gradient layers and set them to darken, or overlay, or subtract, orrr. lighten or dodge glow or divide or soft/hard light.! OR!! edit the hue, saturation, luminosity and contrast.and then color pick from these edits, block even more on top of ur image, flatten, color edit again, etc. etc. until u feel satisfied.

ANYWAYSS . i hope that makes sense @__@ sry i wrote this out and deleted it like 23 times trying to make it make More sense but thats what ive got HAHA i hope its useful though :3 !

[astarionposting]

I love drow but I just can't seem to create a unique tav ;-; I'm scared all our drow tav's look the same in the end😭 any advice?🥹

Honestly, since most drow are purple/blue with white hair and red eyes, it’s hard not to make them look alike, but I don’t think it’s necessarily a bad thing! I love drow sooo much that I just love every single drow tav I see 😭 I think they are all beautiful, so that just means your tav is also beautiful! <3

This turned into kind of a long post, BUT MOD RECS BELOW!!

I am probably not the best person to ask when it comes to creating unique tavs since I use the same face and hair for my fem tavs (IM TOO ATTACHED </3)

I like what I like what can I say, what can I saaay?

But for character customization here are my tips:

I’d say if you want to create a more “unique” drow, feel free to go beyond what is the usual “drow” look (purple/blue skin, red eyes, white hair, etc.)

I’m pretty sure drow can’t naturally have other hair colours (idk i could be wrong, ask @vspin cause they are like a drow lore master-I KNOW NOTHING) but who says hair dye doesn’t exist in faerun?!! Try some cool new hair colours! Have fun with different hairstyles and tattoos, different eye colours, download some new scar mods!

Another big factor is the clothing and accessories + the dye you choose. I feel like they really will allow your tav/oc to stand out.

Basically, DONT FEEL LIMITED!!! GO CRAZY GO WILD RAAAAA

PC PLAYERS - MUST HAVE MODS

Unique Tav - for body tattoos

New Character Creation Presets - a large selection of beautiful heads created by the wonderful Toarie

Npc Options Unlocker - just unlocks npc heads/hairs

Hair Mixer - allows you to mix different hairstyles, I use the oldest version cause I’m too lazy to update this mod, but the newest version allows you to combine THREE hairstyles now!

Astralities' Hair Color Supplement - A fun thing you can do is play around with the eyebrow/eyelash colours + there is more variants of white/grey hair colours if you want to stick with that colour!!

Astralities' Skintone Expansions - Fantasy | Natural- SO many new skin tone options, i feel like this can make a huge difference as well.

New eye colours (and blindness for all eyes) - SO MANY new eye colours + blindness options (as u all know I luv my ocs half blind 😭)

CovenElf's Tattoo and Makeup Collection - I use this for the messy eye makeup + Lillith’s night elf tattoos + I use the one that replaces the floral neck tattoo to intensify eyeshadow colours or I use like a brownish red at a low opacity to create the effect of tired eyes (my fav thing ever)

OTHER MODS I RECOMMEND:

Hair mods - 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7

More heads (even though I use only one lol) - 1 | 2 | 3 | 4

Cool scar mods - 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5

Cool body tattoo mods - 1 | 2 (unique tav also has a large selection of body tattoos)

More face tattoos - 1 | 2 | 3

Cool armour/accessory mods - 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6

More eye variant mods - 1 | 2 | 3

Armour dye mods - 1 | 2 | 3

My full mod list is available HERE (needs to be updated tho) + my oc mod lists - Lillith / Freyja

I hope this was helpful! <3

[stelladess]

I feel a bit annoyed by people saying Firefly is the star rail version of Kallen. As a fan of both characters I feel they got next to nothing in common whatsoever. They dont look similar, they arnt similar people, they dont have similar backgrounds or motives... there is just nothing really. It feels like reducing them to Stelle/Caelus girlfriend (this one is supported by the story but I feel like much of what makes Firefly and this ship interesting gets overlooked, admittedly some of it assumes the theory about Firefly being SAM is true and some lore knowledge about SAM but even without taking that into account Firefly is a great character in her own right) and Otto´s girlfriend (which, as a huge Otto fan, I will say, of course has its own issues and I do not like the romantic interpretation with them, the previous era versions of them are different people and dont count for this imo and there is no evidence at all Kallen of the current era was into Otto and also Kolosten heavily suggests it wasnt even a romance thing for Otto either) I highly recommend people read the prequel comic focused on Kallen, its when Kallen is younger then when we see her in flashbacks, set before meeting Sakura (i highly recommend also checking out that whole story at some point even if it can be a bit awkwardly time gated in game and slightly confusing) in HI3 so her personality/demeanor is a bit different from how she was by then (she is a lot more naive for one) but I think its still a good introduction to see why Kallen is a good character and a good showcase of how she isnt like Firefly at all and doesnt require sitting trough all of Kolosten and several side stuff in game to get to, so its a convenient starting place to see if you want to see more about Kallen. Which I hope anyone reading this ends up wanting to but even if not thats fine and is why I recommend starting here since its an easy read with very nice art and a fairly self contained story. Also if you dont play HI3 and am just curious on Kallen because of what other people are saying. Elan Palatinus: https://manga.honkaiimpact3.com/book/ Some spoilers for Penacony mentioned below here....

Firefly I dont wanna go too deep into character analysis here cause some of it relies heavily on an unproven theory, ill probably write about her more later though. But either way I feel like she is a very well written character, her desire to indulge in some escapism to get a break from her harsh reality with her terminal illness, her determination to find the watchmaker´s legacy despite the risk, her clearly having gotten a lot of experience dealing with dangerous situations despite seemingly wanting to just live a normal happy life, she hasnt been in the game very long (yet, the boss that "killed" her whole gimmick is that you can free the souls it claims so im not so sure she is actually gone, also you can see a Firefly leave her body before she dissolves shortly before Sam shows up...) but she is already very strongly characterized even with her limited screentime. If the theory that she is Sam is also true then it would add an extra layer to her closeness with Stelle in that some lore about Sam suggests Sam was artifically created for the purpose of fighting against the swarm, so she likely would relate to Stelle on account of the whole... being made to fullfill a purpose thing. As a stellaron hunter in this case she would also know about that quite likely so I like the theory. Idunno I just feel frustrated how characters often feel like they get boiled down to just their archetype or role (and sometimes not even any of those but just completely unrecognizable) when they are actually very interesting and well written characters. I want people to appreciate the writing that went into these amazing characters, not just these two but also many other examples but I wont ramble on here. So I strongly recommend people read more about them if at all curious, altough be careful since there are tons of leaks and spoilers in general going around regarding anything Penacony related, so with Firefly it might be best to wait a bit if spoilers are a concern.

[hairscare]

It's not that your art looks like you don't care or don't put effort into it, but your style just looks so... Effortless, I guess lol. Like, it's a favorite of mine because it looks good but I feel like you don't feel the need to make it super polished every time, and I'm trying to move my work in that sort of direction, but I'm really struggling! Do you have any tips?

thank you!!! im the first to admit that a lot of my drawings i get done pretty quick and without a lot of effort, which i dont think is a bad thing or a good thing. i dont really draw to hone some amazing art skill or whatever, i just think its fun :) more than anything, i recommend doing whatevers the most fun for you to do. my art definitely isnt perfect but it makes me happy just to make it so as long as its doing that im fine with it not being technically stellar

anyways, actual art tips: with a simple style i find that a huge factor of it is knowing whats important and focusing on that. i mean if you like little details all power to you but i personally stick to what shapes i need and play with those. for instance the face: sometimes i go through the trouble to sketch it out and make it complicated, give it a chin and cheeks and whatnot, but sometimes you just gotta draw a character with a circle/oval head and call it there. from there its really about how you fill the shape, how big you make the eyes and mouth, what shape you make the nose, how exaggerated things are in proportion to one another. things like simple eyelashes, eyebags, eyebrows and dents around the mouth help exaggerate expressions without you needing to go crazy

shapes are awesome but also shape language is iffy imo because a. people use it to be weird about fat characters and b. theres a lot you can do with the same shape to convey different things. instead, i find that mixing shapes and lines works well for me. for instance, when i draw my classic Jeff The Killer art, i give him a round face and round eyes, sharp hair and mouth, and a square body. the shapes dont really symbolize anything they just look good like that

finally, a very important thing is feeling. when i draw i do it based on semi subconscious feeling. by this i mean what lines and textures are satisfying to draw, both for me and for the design. play around with your lines and try to find ones that feel nice to draw. for example i really like doing the rounded line with a point at the end that i do with dumois' hair. its just nice to draw

again, i cant emphasize enough that you should draw for your own enjoyment. be hedonistic with your art even if it doesnt look exactly like what you imagined: what matters is that you enjoy making it because even though it sounds cheesy it is true that you can tell when someone really enjoyed making their art and it makes it so charming! so go be free and play!!!

[officialgleamstar]

For the recommendation fic ask, 10 and 11 :)

hi anon!! you didnt give me a fandom, so im not sure what youre looking for recs for? :P but i am still thinking about oxventure fics so i will answer with that and if you want something else, you can get back to me XD (you absolutely want something else. i know this. i have like four followers who care about oxventure. i dont care though i wanna talk about these fics)

10. a fic in a series

[NSFW warning 👍‼️] the amount of time i spend thinking about how to get to the sea is like. i am absolutely incapable of explaining how much it lives in my head rent-free. and thats not even my actual recommendation here because actually, im talking about the sequel, and the ocean, which i think about EVEN MORE.

basically anyone who has spoken to me about oxventure knows that @stickthisbig is my favorite oxventure fan writer, i think their fics are brilliant and they can sell me on anything, but oh my god, and the ocean. i like, dont even know what to say here, but i was rereading scenes from this fic literally this morning because i just missed it. i think its such an interesting take on the characters, the plot points are engaging and feel well thought-out, the way everyone acts feels realistic for them, and it hits some tropes that are guilty pleasures of mine <33 i could read the hobby horses fighting with one another for 50 years if sabine was the one writing it. also the kids in the final chapter are so cute, i love them :(

11. Bonus: recommend your favorite fic

once again, probably not a surprising answer, even though its tied between two fics XD "travis, are they both gonna be the oxventurers guild as a polycule" HAHAHAHA. WHAT. yes obviously. have you seen me

another of sabine's fics, nsfw warning again: every which way but loose is just. its so fun. its so really very fun. one of those fics where i stayed up all night reading it even though i had something to do the next day. its silly, its heartfelt, its dramatic, prudence is severely weird about corazón, the guild actually has to deal with consequences for their actions while also hooking up with each other, and then they deal with the consequences of hooking up with each other, its just such a blast <3

aaand for a rated t fic this time LMAO: marriages are like wagons (you wait five years and then four turn up at once) by @ronniebox! (i am pretty sure these are the same ronnieboxes. if not im so sorry for the random @ lmao) im just a sucker for the guild getting married. i think its really cute. this is absolutely my most reread oxventure fic, which is crazy because i really do not tend to enjoy rereading/watching things but its just so special to me <3 in fact i am gonna go reread it again now. bye

fic rec game

[traumasurvivorshelpingsurvivors]

Tw sexual assault, manipulation

Seeking validation and support

My best friend said i wasnt assaulted bc i said yes and i consented and like technically she’s right but also i wouldn’t have said yes if theyd told me the truth

They lied to my face when i asked for reassurance before we had sex they lied so many times. They lied to get me to have sex over and over. I wouldn’t have said yes if id known.

Im so terrified that she is right. Please don��t tell me she’s right. I cant sleep anymore I cant shower. I get triggered over the smallest things and I dissociate all the time. I dont feel real anhmore. I cant leave my house without looking over my shoulder to make sure they arent around . I’m so scared. I dont know how to feel about it. It was coercion right? I feel like im losing my mind. Tey lied for our whole relationship about so many things bc they knew id leave if i knew

Hi anon,

This may sound confusing or contradictory at first, but just because you say yes doesn't mean you're giving consent. The context surrounding that yes determines whether or not it is a viable form of consent. For example, being pressured or coerced into saying yes is not viable consent, because you are not given the freedom to say no. Another example is being misled into giving consent, where you are told that one thing will happen, you give consent to that, but something unspoken then happens that you did not consent to. So, for example, you may consent to cuddle someone, but they may take that to mean you also consent to having sex with them next, even though that was not mentioned. It sounds like you were manipulated into giving consent to something you were not made aware of, in which case it is not viable consent. It's not about whether or not you say yes, it's about whether or not you wanted it.

It sounds like you're understandably experiencing several trauma responses after what happened, like hypervigilance, feelings of paranoia, and perpetual fear. If you can access or afford it, I strongly recommend reaching out to a mental health professional such as a therapist, as they can help you regulate your nervous system, process your experiences, and regain a sense of safety in your life. If anyone has any comments or suggestions, please feel free to add on. Otherwise, I hope I could help and please let us know if you need anything.

-Bun

[boycritter]

how i fuck with color like that: a hopefully helpful guide

STEP 1: SUSPEND YOUR DISBELIEF

skin doesnt have to be skin color. grass doesnt have to be grass color. free yourself from these shackles.

STEP 2: PICK COLOR PALETTE

pick 3-4 colors you want to be the main colors of your piece, but know you can use transitional shades and stuff like that as well, so you arent limited to those exact 3-4 colors

for this piece, this was the color scheme i went with, but obviously a lot more colors show up! general rule of thumb i follow is 1 dark tone, 1-3 mid tones, and 1 light tone. if you're painting digitally, you can reduce the saturation to check that your values are distinct :3

also if you're painting digitally!! you can use tonal correction (or whatever its called in your art program of choice) to adjust the hue/saturation/luminosity of an entire layer :3 which can be pretty helpful if you think your colors are a liiiittle bit off, but you want to keep the relative saturation/luminosity/etc the same

sometimes i will go to sites like this one for inspiration, but other times i just know what i want to do

STEP 3: FUCK AROUND?? IDK WHAT TO CALL THIS STEP

start slapping down color in the places you want it to go. uhhh i have no good advice for this part i just feel it in my bones. which i know is not super helpful. if you have a reference image, USE IT. its your reference for a reason. you can turn the saturation of it all the way down so you're not distracted by the hues, just pay attention to the value and stuff. don't worry about it looking realistic or smooth, in my experience the blockier the chunks of color, the funkier the piece will look.

STEP 4: FIND OUT !!!!

does it look good! hell yeah! good job! does it not look good? hell yeah! that means you're practicing! identify what you think works and what doesn't, and apply that knowledge in the future! working with a limited color palette definitely takes practice, but if you know basic color theory then you should be in a good starting position (if you dont um. you should learn that? i dont think im qualified to teach that) yeah idk basically you can just refine your piece a bit, i would recommend using a brush that has built in color mixing if you can find one of those, those are good :3

STEP 5: OVERLAYS

if you're painting digitally overlays are YOUR BEST FRIEND!!!! fill bucket tool a whole layer with one of your midtones, reduce opacity, set it to overlay (abt 20% in my experience), this will really unify the colors of the piece

get funky, get fancy, create visual interest. what i do is similar to the first thing, but i take this like. sand tool?

its one of the defaults on csp, but what ill do is i'll draw squiggles with this on a separate layer with all the colors of my color palette, then set it to a 10-20% overlay, and it gives it this grainy texture i think is really cool

piece linked above without any overlays versus with both a plain overlay and grainy overlay

STEP 6: PAT URSELF ON THE BACK FOR DOING SUCH A GOOD JOB AT ART !!!!!!!!!

^ do that. you are awesome and every thing you create is valuable even if you dont like how it turned out. you need to make mistakes to get better and you did such a good job and im proud of you for creating. <3

[cluster-b-culture-is]

hey!!! if its ok i’d like you’re thoughts on something ig and to sorta ask you something

so im bodily 15 atm, and i have cptsd. when i look at posts regarding certain cluster b experiences (possibly some cluster c aswell) i relate a LOT (obviously im not saying that bc i relate that i have these disorders, i just kinda have a feeling that *something* is going on). its tricky bc i keep looking into things and i cant really find an answer. i also dont know if im too young and that its just because im a teenager.

i wont get into like what “symptoms” i experience rn bc i feel like thats a whole other conversation but yeah.

i hope i dont sound like one of those people that are like “i must have x bc i related to a silly video i saw” im just really confused and i feel like something aint right

i know you’re probably not professionals so feel free to delete or ignore this if its too much, but if not, what do you think?

So, here's the thing (and we will attempt to avoid being patronizing): It is absolutely correct that your age and emotional/psychological development can affect things, and that the process of development can cause things that look like mild symptoms. It's also correct that that combined with c-ptsd (and any other disorders you may have; you'd be surprised how many symptoms and comorbidities autism, ADHD, NPD, and BPD all share) can make it extremely hard to determine where your symptoms are coming from and whether there might be something more.

(You're also correct that we are not professionals; this is all coming from our own research and personal experiences, so as with everything, take this with a grain of salt.)

However. I would argue that it would be far more harmful to deny any possibility of having a personality disorder until you reach some arbitrary age threshold than it would be to say that you do have a PD. Especially if looking at your life experiences through the lens of having a PD is helpful, and if resources for pw/[x]PDs are helpful to you. Even if you don't end up having a PD, that doesn't mean you were just a hormonal stupid teenager refusing to listen to the Adults™ or whatever the fuck--it means that you looked at your experiences, found something that seemed similar, and it turned out that you were wrong; but hopefully, along the way, you found things that were helpful.

Under the assumption that you have done a lot of research, I would personally recommend saying that you have traits of a particular disorder as opposed to saying you have the full disorder, and that is to two ends: one, a lot of adults with PDs (especially in ASPD spaces, if that's one of the disorders you're looking at) will kick your shit to hell and back if you even insinuate that you think you may have the full disorder (which I think is extremely counterintuitive if we want teenagers to understand their experiences and, yknow, not develop a full-blown personality disorder, regardless of whether you think teenagers can have a full personality disorder); and two, it might help you target the specific symptoms that you're experiencing without saddling you with the belief[/knowledge] that you have an incredibly stigmatized and lifelong disorder.

A lot of this stuff depends on a few things: (A) what your symptoms are (and if they can be better explained by other things, especially other things you know you have); (B) how severe your symptoms are (like the difference between being generally grouchy versus being actively hostile); and (C) how long your symptoms have lasted (if they only started popping up in the past few months or the past year versus if you've had them for years and years).

If you end up not having a personality disorder, anon, I think it will still be better for you in the long run to explore the possibility instead of shrugging it off under the excuse that you're "too young". It could turn out that you never had the disorder and it really was something else, it could turn out that you have traits but not the full disorder, or, hell, it could turn out that, by using resources and support you found by being part of communities surrounding PDs, you ended up not developing the full PD (even if you may still have a few traits)--because, at this age, you are still developing, and you are changing a lot, and very little is set in stone when it comes to these types of things--and you should absolutely take advantage of that! And even then, speaking from a more selfish perspective, it will never be a bad thing for more people to understand what it may be like to have a personality disorder.

For a bit of actionable advice on determining whether or not you may have one, though:

(1) Do your research. Obviously it's great that you're getting information from people with the disorders themselves by looking at PD communities; however, not everything having to do with the disorder will be talked about, and quite honestly, Tumblr is a terrible place to find definitive information on the PDs. Life experience? Yes. Actual information looking at how the disorders work and what they can entail in full? Ehhh, not quite. Look at a variety of academic sources, but in the same vein, keep your wits about you--professionals aren't immune to ableism, and may often perpetuate it with glee. Some of it may be obvious, some of it might not be.

(2) Keep an eye on your symptoms--make a manual check against the actual criteria every once in a while (but keep in mind that the DSM is also deeply flawed and biased); @shitborderlinesdo has a ton of checklists based on the DSM and individual testimony that can help. We first started questioning ASPD when we were 14, and we'd do those kinds of manual checks once every several months or once a year or so. It both helps you understand what your symptoms are, and helps you keep track of how you're doing over time. Don't use online quizzes for this; quite honestly, they're not really good for anything except validation if you know you'll get a high score.

(3) Look at stuff other than personality disorders, too, and try to figure out why your interest skews towards specific disorders. For a long ass time, we believed we had StPD and did our absolute best to ignore any information to the contrary, because (due to our symptoms) if it wasn't StPD, the only thing it could be otherwise was schizophrenia, and we were scared shitless of the idea; at first because we were scared of the idea that our symptoms might've been so severe, but eventually because we were afraid to admit that we were wrong. (As I've said before, no shame in being wrong--do as I say, not as I do.)

Ultimately, I can't stop you from doing anything, and I can't force you to do anything either. I'm just a mentally ill guy with an internet connection. My life experiences have led me to this conclusion, and others may disagree with it--that's perfectly fine. Again, I am not a professional. You know yourself and your experiences the best, and I think by this point, you have enough understanding of yourself and the world to be able to figure out what'll be best for you and your health, given that you have the proper resources to do so. You are a being with life experience, even if it's less than others may have; you aren't a rock, and you aren't a three year old who still hasn't realized that touching the lit stove will equal a burned finger. I personally think that the way a lot of folks go about talking to and about teenagers who think they may have personality disorders is, frankly, infantilizing and invalidating, and it just ends up with traumatized and unsupported teenagers turning into traumatized and unsupported adults, with the added bonus of an extra helping of imposter syndrome to top it all off.

I hope you're doing well anon, and I hope you see this (sorry for responding so late lmao). Off into the world ye may go, hopefully with a bit more knowledge and idea of what to do next than you had before.

[legacydevice]

Do you know what old pc I should get for retro gaming?

Thanks for the question! Keep in mind that this is written from the assumption that you have no/very basic knowledge of older computers, so I apologize if this comes off a bit patronizing! Even if you know quite a bit, other people reading may not and I want to make sure people are knowledgeable before making a purchase!

If you dont care about hardware, and your current pc can handle it, I'd recommend setting up a VM with the operating system of your choice (windows xp would probably have the most flexibility). Look up a tutorial on how to set up a VM with VirtualBox, and you can easily find .iso files of your operating system of choice online. (Obviously be careful of what you download). This is also convenient because if you dont own physical copies of your games it's pretty easy to get the files from the internet archive and transfer them to the VM! If you need any more help with this, feel free to send me an ask and I can help you out!

If you're a hardware lover like me though, I definitely understand wanting to have the experience of the real thing! Please keep in mind im not totally educated about specs and technical stuff, so take my opinion with a grain of salt and look for others input as well (followers please add on / correct me)!

A lot of it depends on the kind of games you want to run, if you're fine with only 2d games you should be fine with most computers that have an appropriate cpu/ram for the year it was made! However, running 3d games will definitely need a good gpu. There are plenty of people on ebay who sell custom built computers geared towards retro gaming, I'd recommend looking into listings of those even if you do not want to buy on eBay just to get an idea of what you would like!

I personally use Facebook marketplace to look for old computers that I want to buy. A lot of times you can get pretty good deals on there! While not a gaming oriented computer, I got my micron millennia, including the crt monitor, keyboard, mouse, and speakers all for $80! It also runs pretty much any games I want to play on there, but I haven't tried any beefier 3d games yet so I'm not sure how it will do with those. You can also check local thrift stores around you as well, I've been able to find a Dell optiplex for $40 once before. I would recommend local shops rather than goodwills since most goodwills usually sell their good stuff online for auction, but it doesn't hurt to check if you're feeling lucky!

Keep in mind that buying locally very much depends on if you can drive/have access to a car, so I totally understand if this isn't an option for you. I also have only ever lived in the US so your buying options will probably be different if you are in another country. If you know of any local retro tech enthusiast groups, they could probably help you out specific to your location! Again, Facebook is a good resource to find local groups.

The other option is buying from eBay. It will be more expensive because of shipping but you can at least get something more geared to your specifics and it's more convenient if you do not have access to transportation. Searching up something like "custom retro gaming pc" or "vintage gaming pc" should help you out!

Also, if this is your first time buying an old computer, or you do not have any experience with technology repair, you may want to buy from someone who has that experience and has already refurbished the computer for you. Blown capacitors and shitty power supplies are no joke, they can be very dangerous! If you absolutely need a computer that is advertised as not working/not tested, take it to someone who knows what they're doing before plugging it in. Again, I apologize if this comes off as patronizing but I want to make sure everyone is safe and no one has any bad experiences that may turn away people from this hobby!

Another recommendation I'd give is to get something you like! I know this might be a bit obvious, but I really like windows 98 because of nostalgia reasons, and my roommate would often ask me why I didn't get a pc with windows XP. Personally all the games I want to play run fine on 98, and i'm willing to use a VM for games that need XP. Get something that makes you happy if it is within your budget and convenient for you!

I apologize if this is a bit rambly! I'm waiting for an oil change and im bored lol. Other people feel free to add on and im willing to answer more questions if needed :)