#feel free to reblog this post again just because it's the last day let's get some more people in

[gayalienwilde]

Last day to join this!!!

Tomorrow I will write to everyone who they're gonna be making gifts for. The deadline is the 30th, but don't worry if you need a little more time you can post it whenever you're done, just remember to use #VGsecretfairy2023 and to tag the person so they can find it.

If everyone had fun with this we can do it next year too :)

Velvet Goldmine Secret Fairy gift exchange

These holidays I thought it would be fun to organize a Velvet Goldmine themed gift exchange. This event's tag will be #VGsecretfairy2023 feel free to use it!

How to participate

Whoever wants to participate can fill out this google form, that closes in a week, and will have until the 30th of December to work on a gift, the gifts can be fanarts, fanfics, analysis posts, web weavings, playlists etc...basically whatever your heart desires! I added a question for people that want to specify what character/s or scenarios they're interested in to make it easier for people to come up with a gift for them, if you want to be surprised simply leave it blank.

For any questions you can send an ask or message me any time :)

Happy holidays and have fun everyone!!! <3<3<3

[bloatedandalone04]

To The One I Love - Part 8

Series Masterlist

➪in which you get your stitches taken out the same day a storm is said to hit, and you and tyler separate for the first time in two and a half weeks.

PSA: strongly suggested to read the warnings before proceeding.

WC; 5.1k | Do not repost this anywhere, reblogs are fine ♡

Tyler smiled at you as he went back out to make a second trip to the truck to grab the rest of the groceries as you watched him from the front steps. “I can help, you know,” you said once he passed by you again, his arms holding more than two bags on each one. 

“I know,” he said back and paused next to you, towering over you a bit with his height. “But you’ve done a lot today already. You just keep doing what you’re doing; standin’ there and lookin’ pretty.”

You smirked and leaned against the post of the front deck, placing your hand on your hip. “Like this?” You asked, sliding your free hand up and gripping the white wood. 

Tyler smirked right back at you as he nodded, “Yeah,” he answered, setting the bags down, “Exactly like that.” 

He walked up to you and watched as your stance faltered a bit as he stood right in front of you, his chest practically pressed against yours as he stared down at you with nothing but love and adoration in his eyes.

“God, you’re so gorgeous,” he mumbled and you blushed as you let your arms fall to your sides again. Your eyes flicker between his own and his lips, and then you were giving him a shy smile and he wished it was time to go to bed already, because he was craving the feeling of being in his own bed he shared with you and having you in his arms. He wanted to kiss you and hold you so badly. He missed feeling your lips. He missed you. All of you. “You’re so beautiful.” 

Your face reddens even more as you place your hands flat on his chest. “Stop it, you’re making me feel all warm,”

Tyler grinned before he shook his head. “I’m not gonna stop, never,” he mumbled, “You’re the most stunnin’ girl I’ve ever seen, baby. I can’t help but tell you that all the time.” 

You poorly fought off a grin as you leaned forward and rested your head on his chest, your arms wrapping around his middle in a gentle hug that he instantly returned. 

Your body was warm against his, and he buried his face in your hair as he breathed you in. Even after everything, he was still addicted to you. Every single part of you. “I miss you,” he mumbled next to your ear, and you just held him a bit tighter. He didn’t mean for the words to make you feel bad, but when he felt you tense up a bit and press your face against his chest, he knew you were feeling guilty again. “Hey, baby…look at me.”

The last thing Tyler wanted was for you to feel like any of this was your fault in any way. It wasn’t at all, and he knew that. He just wished you knew it, too. 

You pulled away and reluctantly looked up at him, keeping your chest pressed to his as your eyes held a mix of frustration and guilt, and he hated all of it.

“Stop feelin’ guilty about forgettin’, baby. None of this is your fault, you know it and I know it. You think I blame you for somethin’ you had absolutely no control over? I don’t and I never have and never will, so stop thinkin’ like that,”he murmured, bringing his hands up to stroke your jaw. 

“But…” you trailed off as you looked up at him with teary eyes. “I’m just…I’m so sorry. I’m so…so sorry, Ty.”

He knew you had been beating yourself up over this for a week now, and it was honestly killing him. He wanted to protect you, and he always tried to, but how could he protect you from yourself? “Babe, you have nothin’ to apologize for. It’s not your fault,” he said, tilting your head up so you can’t look away again. “It’s not your fault, okay? I don’t blame you. I promise you, I don’t blame you.”  

You nodded and leaned into his touch, closing your eyes as you turned your head and pressed a kiss to his palm. Even though the getsure was small and the pressure of your lips on his skin was faint, it still sent sparks through Tyler’s body. 

Tyler leaned down to press a kiss to your forehead. “I promise, it doesn’t matter that you don’t remember,” he mumbled, pressing another soft, barely-there kiss to one end of your stitches. “And I’m not mad at you for any of this, and I never have been.”

You nodded again before giving him a tight smile. “I’m tired,” you whispered and changed the subject, which he was kinda glad about. It was twice now that you had become taken over by guilt today, and he didn’t want to dampen your mood further. “Can I watch a few more streams? Or maybe I can help you unpack the groceries and we can watch some together after?” 

Tyler grinned at your sneaky attempt of  trying to get him to let you help, but he was used to your tricks by now. “Yeah, you go get comfy on the couch,” he replied, guiding you inside and out of the afternoon sun. “I’ll handle the groceries.”

A few hours later, the groceries were unpacked and put away, and Tyler watched countless old streams with you until he got up to make dinner, then you asked to watch more after. He wondered if part of you, the one that failed to remember anything, missed those days that you had forgotten about, and that’s why you wanted to watch so many.  Eitherway, he wasn’t complaining. He liked reliving those memories with you. 

When it became quite late, he set you up with a show and a hot chocolate you managed to convince him to buy for you earlier, then he had a quick shower in the bathroom attached to yours and his bedroom. As he passed by the bed towards the dresser, he felt a warmth take over him as water droplets rolled down his body. Finally, after what felt like forever, he knew he would be getting some decent sleep tonight. Because he would be next to you, where he belonged. 

Half an hour later, you joined him in the bedroom just as he was pulling back the covers. “You sure you want me to sleep with you?” He asked as he fluffed the pillow on his side that he knew you’d been sleeping on since the fabric smelled like your conditioner. “I just want you to be comfortable.”

You turned to him with a small smile as you nodded. “Of course I still want you to sleep with me,” you answered, pulling off your hoodie as you sat down on your side of the bed. “This is where we’re supposed to be. Together.”

Those were the truest words he’d ever heard. Yeah, you and he were supposed to be together, and had been for over a decade. A whole decade with you, how lucky was he? Even though you lost almost all those years, nothing had really changed. 

Tyler got in bed next to you, and almost instantly you moved closer to him until your body was pressed against his, your head on his chest. His hands ran up and down your back, your skin feeling warm even through the fabric of your shirt. You felt so perfect against him, so right. He felt like a giddy teen again, like how he did when he held you like this for the first time. 

As he rests his chin gently on the top of your head, he can tell you’re almost asleep as he whispers, “You know I’d do anythin’ for you, right? Anythin’ you want…or need, I’ll do it. You know that, right?”

You hummed, nuzzling your face against his neck. “I know,” you whispered back, “You’ve proved that in the week I’ve been home.”

Tyler sighed quietly, tangling his fingers in your hair. “Promise me we’ll end every day like this,” he mumbled, “I don’t want to sleep by myself in that guest room ever again.”

You nodded, and that was enough for him, but your words just made the feeling inside him even more intense. “I already feel so much better and comfortable now that you’re here with me. I don’t want to be anywhere else than right here, with you,” you said quietly, clearly struggling to stay away at this point as you cuddled into his warmth. “So yeah…I promise.”

“Good…you’re where you belong, baby. Right here in my arms,” he said, then you were completely relaxed against him, and he knew you were asleep. But Tyler didn’t want to go to sleep yet, not when he finally had you back in his arms in almost two weeks. “I love you so much. So, so much.” He murmured, reveling in the familiar feeling of being this close to you again. 

A week goes by, and Dr. James had called Tyler in regards to you getting your stitches taken out. 

Tyler was a bit on edge today, since there was a Tornado watch out, but he wasn’t anxious because he was scared. No, he lived for the adrenaline of chasing, but he hadn’t left your side for two and a half weeks. He had completely put that part of his life on pause for you, and he wouldn’t change a thing about it. 

Still, he felt the urge he always got to throw himself right in the line of danger whenever a storm was set to hit. 

However, he was anxious about taking you back to the hospital, even though it was just for you to get your stitches taken out. He was in the kitchen, pulling open the dishwasher as he looked for his travel mug that he misplaced every single time he used it. 

It was rather early in the morning, and he needed coffee if he was going to be able to make the drive to and from the hospital. “Damn,” he muttered, closing the dishwasher after seeing that the mug wasn’t in there. You wandered into the kitchen, looking as adorable as ever in your leggings and one of his flannels, but he barely smiled at you as he opened up a cupboard. “Where the hell did I put it?” 

You laughed quietly before walking over to the cabinet across from the stove. You open it and pull out the black mug, holding it out to him as you mumbled, “Here,” 

Tyler froze once he took it from you, and he glanced down at it before back up at you, wondering how you knew it was in there since he hadn’t used it in a few weeks, and you definitely hadn’t been rummaging around in the kitchen the last two weeks for you to have seen it in there. Somehow you knew where it was, though. At least your body did. “Thanks, baby…” he said as he set the mug down on the counter. “How did you know where it was?”

It wasn’t rare for you to always know where the things he misplaced were, but instances like this hadn’t happened since you got injured. And maybe he was reading too much into it, but by the look on your face, you were a bit confused, too. “I don’t know. I just had a feeling, I guess,” you trailed off as you, too, glanced down at the steel mug as if the thing had powers or something. 

Tyler looked at you for a long moment, hoping that maybe this was a sign that your memory was on its way back, even if you didn’t know it. “You just knew, huh?” He couldn’t stop the grin from taking over his face as he reached out and took your chin between his thumb and index finger. 

You smiled up at him before stepping into his arms for a hug. You had told him that you were a bit nervous to have your stitches taken out, even though your head was looking so much better, and he could feel the way your body thrummed a bit in his hold. 

Just as he was about to speak, you pulled back and looked up at him for a few seconds before slowly leaning up to press your lips to his. Tyler froze for a second time as he processed the feeling of your mouth against his, the feeling so familiar even after he had gone without it for half a month. 

After a second, he melted against you, his hand sliding to your jaw as he kissed you back, unable to stop himself after holding back for so long. He kissed you as if his life depended on it, the ache he’s been feeling since he carried you into that hospital the first time finally beginning to fade just a bit. 

His heart was beating fast as he deepened the kiss, pulling you closer to him. His hand tangled gently in your hair as he softly took over, pushing you back against the counter as he wrapped his arm tightly around your waist. Kissing you like this felt as natural as breathing. It was how you and he always kissed, and it made him feel a bit light headed in the best possible way. 

After a few more seconds, you pull away with a breath of air escaping your mouth, and you grin up at him. Your lips were a bit wet from his, and your hands were tightly gripping his biceps as you tried to catch your breath, and you looked so beautiful. “Damn, baby,” he rasped, stroking your jaw with his thumb. “I almost forgot how good you taste.”

He didn’t, that was a lie. 

You laughed as blush took over your face, and you quickly covered his mouth with your hand. “Don’t say that,” you whined quietly, burying your face against his neck. 

Tyler laughed too, wrapping his fingers around your wrist and pulling your hand away from his mouth. “Why not? It’s true, you taste so good,” he said again, and you just groaned and shook your head, pulling back to look up at him. 

“We need to go,” you state, pulling away from him completely. 

Tyler almost groaned too, because now he wanted to forget about the hospital completely so he could stay here and kiss you like a horny teenager all morning, but then again…that could wait. It had to. “You’re right,” he mumbled, filling the mug he now had a strange amount of fondness for with coffee before leading you out to the truck. 

At the hospital, you and Tyler were both grinning as Nurse Karson led you into a room towards the end of a hallway. “How are you doing?” She asked as you situated yourself on the examination bed, the paper sheet wrinkling under you. “Any progress on those memories?”

You shook your head and answered, “No, not really,” 

But Tyler couldn’t even bring himself to feel disappointed, because he was still thinking about your kiss in the kitchen earlier. 

“Oh, that’s okay,” she smiled, gently turning your head so she could look at your stitches for a few seconds. “They look good, healed nicely. I’ll send in Dr. James in a few minutes.”

Tyler nodded and leaned against the end of the bed, smiling as you leaned towards him and pressed your cheek against his bicep. 

For some reason, he felt the best he’s felt since the night you got injured. He felt hopeless before, like there was no way you and he would be able to completely restart things, but now that he knew you were still connected both physically and emotionally, he had a change of heart. 

While the thought of you never getting your memories back hurt him beyond words,  he knew it really didn’t matter in the end, because he still had you. 

Dr. James entered the room a few minutes later, a big smile on his face as he walked towards you. “How are you? How are you feeling?” He asked, shaking Tyler’s hand in a greeting before moving to the other side of you. 

“I’m good,” you say, lifting your head from Tyler’s arm. “Feeling good.”

“I’m glad to hear it. Also glad to see smiles on both your faces,” he nodded, turning your head as he brought the light closer to your healed cut. “Looks great. You did a good job taking care of it. I hear that your memories still aren’t back, but don’t worry. It takes time. I’m just glad to see that you both seem a lot happier now than when I last saw you.” He grinned, reaching for a pair of gloves.

Happy didn’t even begin to cover it, but it was close enough. 

Just as James was about to slide the gloves on, another doctor knocked on the door. “Dr. James, you’re needed in 203,” he said a bit impatiently as James turned to look at him. “It’s urgent.” 

You looked between the two doctors before looking up at Tyler, and he just smiled and leaned down to kiss the top of your head. He was in such a good mood, he didn’t even care if he had to wait a bit longer now. 

But Dr. James sighed and turned back to you. “I don’t want to keep you, especially since the weather is supposed to get bad soon. Do you mind if my friend here takes over?” He asked, gesturing for the other doctor to enter the room. 

“No,” you shook your head. “I don’t mind at all.” It also sounded like you were in a great fucking mood, and that made Tyler smile as James nodded and quickly left the room. 

“Alright, let’s see here,” Doctor…Hansen said as he walked over to you and turned your head a bit fast to the side, making you look up at Tyler with wide eyes as a slight smile formed on your lips. “Ah, just need these to come out, huh?”

Hansen grabbed a pair of gloves and scissors and moved to tower over you, and Tyler would’ve actually preferred to have waited for James, because this guy seemed like he was a bit too impatient for this. 

“Okay, this shouldn’t hurt at all,” he mumbled, then began pulling at the threads of your stitches. 

You winced, your eyes squinting a bit as you tried to stay still, but now Tyler was kind of annoyed, because this guy was clearly in a rush and wasn’t going as slow as he needed to be. 

Tyler let you grab his hand as Dr. Hansen cut at each thread and pulled them out, and when you winced for a second time, Tyler leaned back to look at him. “Hey, can you maybe be a bit more gentle? You said it shouldn’t hurt, but it doesn’t seem to be turnin’ out that way, doctor,” he said, unable to keep the irritation out of his voice.

“I apologize,” the doctor muttered, but he did end up being a lot more gentle after that, and soon enough, the stitches were all out, leaving just a red line along your head. “There, all done. Any questions?”

You and Tyler shared a look before you both shook your heads, and he nodded before taking off his gloves. 

“Alright then, you guys better get home before the storm hits,” he said, already heading towards the door. “Have a good rest of your day.”

Then it was just you and Tyler in the room. “I think I like James better,” you mumbled and Tyler hummed in agreement, helping you off the bed.

He turned you to face him so he could look at your head, and the skin looked a bit irritated, but he wasn’t sure if it was because of Hansen or if this was a normal thing after having stitches removed. “Are you okay? Does it hurt?” He asked, wrapping his arm around your waist as he walked with you out of the room and down the hall. 

“Yeah, I’m good,” you replied, leaning against him as you reached up and ran your fingers along your head. “He could’ve been a bit more gentle, but it doesn’t hurt too much.”

Tyler furrowed his brows as he walked past the nurse’s station, and he made a mental note to call later and say that Doctor Hansen is a real prick. “It shouldn’t hurt at all, baby,” he sighed,  helping you up into the truck once you made it outside. The sky was a dark shade of gray, signaling that the storm was coming soon, and he sighed again before looking back at you. 

“You want to chase it, don’t you?” You asked quietly as you leaned back against the seat, and Tyler didn’t lie when he nodded his head in response. “Do it. Drop me off at home and meet up with Lilly and the others. I’ll be okay by myself.”

Tyler shook his head and reached for your seatbelt. “No, baby, it’s fine,” he said, “I’ll get the next one, I don’t want-”

You cut him off by guiding his mouth to yours for the second time today, and Tyler shut up immediately as he returned the sweet kiss. It was short but just as amazing as every other kiss, and when you pulled away, you were smiling. “I’ll be fine, Ty,” you said again, “Take me home then go do what you do best, Mr. Tornado Wrangler.” 

He was about to protest again, but the look you gave him had him grinning before nodding. “Okay,” he said quietly, leaning in to press one last quick kiss to your lips before shutting the door and getting in on the driver’s side. 

While Tyler wasn’t very keen on the idea of leaving you at home by yourself, the storm wasn’t set to hit anywhere near the house, so he knew you’d be safe in regards to that, but what if you needed him and he wasn’t there? You’d been great since the day he brought you home, and he knew you were completely comfortable there, but still…he had his doubts. 

His fingers were loosely laced with yours the whole ride home, and when he pulled up to yours and his little sanctuary, you looked tired when he turned to face you. “I can stay,” he said, giving your hand a gentle squeeze. “I don’t want to leave you alone.”

You grinned and unbuckled your seatbelt to be able to turn and face him fully. “I’ll be alone for only a little bit. And I’m kind of tired, so you’d just be sitting with me the whole time if you were to stay anyway,” you pointed out as you brought his hand up and pressed the back of it against your cheek. “I’ll watch your stream and wish I was there with you, but I don’t want you to think about me when you’re out there okay? Focus on what matters.”

“So…you?” Tyler smirked, his thumb stroking your cheek bone. “I’m always thinkin’ about you, baby. Always.”

Your smile grew and you leaned into his touch. “Good,” you laughed quietly. “I’ll be fine, okay? Don’t worry about me. And please, please, be careful.”

Tyler knew you were right, and with a reluctant sigh, he nodded. “I will,” he said before leaning over to kiss you sweetly. “Call me if you need anythin’, okay? I’ll have my phone on me the whole time.”

You nodded and pressed a quick kiss to his cheek, then you were getting out of the truck and walking towards the house as you subtly rubbed at your head. 

-

Tyler had been gone for about twenty minutes now as you settled on the couch, a blanket covering your body as you touched your head some more. 

You knew you should probably stop, but it was itchy and Dr. Hansen was definitely rushing the process of removing your stitches earlier. You had stitches in your arm when you were a kid, and that removal was painless, unlike this one. It shouldn’t hurt this much after. 

Still, you propped your elbow up on the armrest of the couch as you fumbled around with the TV remote, and soon enough, your boyfriend’s face was on the flat screen. You smiled as a warmth took over your body, and you felt a sense of pride fill your veins, because that crazy guy on the TV was all yours, and had been for so long now, even if you couldn’t remember all of those years right now. 

It was kind of crazy to see him go from the sweet, caring guy he was in the truck to the outgoing, wild and carefree person he was right now. It was honestly very attractive to see his many sides, and you leaned further back as you looked at his handsome face as he spoke to the camera mounted on the dashboard of the truck you had a large amount of fondness for. 

Then the screen changed to an aerial view of the tornado, and your smile faded a little bit. A feeling of dread took over you, because that massive gust of wind was happening right now, and your boyfriend was near it. And would be getting even closer to it. Right now. 

You knew what he did, and you knew you did it with him before you got hurt, but to see it now was something else. You didn’t feel this way when you were watching past streams, because Tyler was right next to you when you watched them, but now he wasn’t, because this was happening in real time. 

You quickly looked around for your phone, unsure of why you were suddenly feeling like you were about to be sick as you scrambled across the couch to grab the device from off the coffee table. 

Something didn’t feel right, and you were beginning to realize that it wasn’t just the side of your head that hurt, but all of it. Your whole head was pounding now, and it felt like your brain was expanding outside your skull’s limit. 

Your vision blurred a bit as you pushed the blanket onto the floor, suddenly feeling overheated as you tried to find Tyler’s contact through the blurriness. Just when you saw his name, you let out a sharp gasp and dropped your phone as you cradled your head and fell back against the couch, the only sounds being heard were your pained moans and the cheerful, smug voice of your boyfriend on the TV. 

Then it went black.

-

“Okay, lovebirds,” Lilly groaned as Tyler pulled you into his arms outside the movie theater. “It’s late, and I need to get some sleep if we’re gonna be chasin’ anythin’ tomorrow.”

Tyler smiled at his friend and nodded, tucking you close to his chest as he swayed with you in his arms. “Okay, Lil,” he mumbled, “Have a good night.”

Lilly nodded at you and Tyler. “I’ll see you both tomorrow,” she said, looking back to the street to check the traffic. “You guys get some sleep, yeah? No stayin’ up late doing…whatever.” She cringed before smiling and quickly walking across the street once it was clear for her to do so. 

You blushed and buried your face against Tyler’s neck, murmuring, “Take me home, Ty,”

Tyler hummed, leaning down to press a deep kiss to your lips, holding you tight against his body. “Oh, I will, baby,” he said back, peppering your face with quick kisses just as a few raindrops started to fall. He pulled away and looked up at the sky, blinking quickly as the rain dropped onto his face. “It wasn’t supposed to rain tonight. You stay right here, babe, I’ll go get the truck.” He stated, guiding you to stand closer to the doors of the theater so you were out of the rain. 

“I can get a little wet, baby,” you teased, leaning up to press a kiss to his cheek. “But you’re hot when you’re a gentleman, so I’ll do as I’m told.”

Tyler grinned and placed another soft kiss to your lips before pulling away. “You just stay out of trouble, yeah?” He teased back as he stepped out into the rain that hadn’t quite picked up yet. “Love you.”

“Love you,” you called back, smiling as you watched him walk quickly down the street. 

As you waited, the air became a bit thicker, an indication that a storm was on its way, but not just a rain storm. No, you’d been in enough storms to know that this was much bigger than rain, and you were proven right when the woman next to you, who was also seeking shelter from the cold drops of water, began panicking as she looked at her phone. 

You didn’t need to see the screen to know what she was reading, the loud alarm that sounded through the device told you that it was a tornado warning. 

Then everyone on the street started to panic, except for you. You knew better than to freak out at a time like this.

As you stepped away from the doors, you heard the unmistakable sound of a girl crying, and when you looked to your right, you saw a kid standing in the rain, tears falling down her rosy cheeks.  Without thinking, you quickly made your way over to her, kneeling down on the sidewalk as you gently grabbed her arms. “Hey, it’s okay,” you said, instantly becoming soaked as you looked around for anyone that shared any of the girl’s features. “Where’s your mom, huh? Or your dad?” 

She shrugged as she sobbed and clung to your shirt. “I don’t know!”

You furrowed your brows, feeling a sense of protectiveness over the young girl, who looked no more than five. “Hey, it’s okay,” you said again. “I’m gonna stay with you, okay? We’re gonna…” you trailed off as you looked behind her at the bricked wall of the theater. It was cracking with each passing second from the force of the wind and rain, and before you could get out another word, it began to collapse. 

Without hesitating, you shoved the girl away from you just as the bricks shot out everywhere, the whole wall breaking apart and raining debris down onto the sidewalk. A burning sensation took over your body as a brick slammed right into your head, and you fell back before you could process what had happened. 

Then your vision faded to black, and your eyes shut.

-

2 more parts left...thank you for reading x

[scoonsalicious]

Unwanted: Chapter 13, Uncomfortable - Pt. 4

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Avenger!Fem!Reader

Summary: When your FWB relationship with your best friend Bucky Barnes turns into something more, you couldn’t be happier. That is, however, until a new Avenger sets her sights on your super soldier and he inadvertently breaks your heart. You take on a mission you might not be prepared for to put some distance between the two of you and open yourself up to past traumas. Too bad the only one who can help you heal is the one person you can no longer trust.

Warnings: (For this part only; see Story Masterlist for general Warnings) Language, the last straw, arguing, violence, Sexually Explicit Content Minors: GTFO; I don’t serve your kind here (angry/rough PIV, fingering, degradation kink), memories of past CSA, self harm, Bucky really, really fucks up.

Word Count: 4k

Previously On...: Tony sent you a very expensive apology gift.

A/N: Ya’ll are getting this early! Just one thing to say:

I am so, so sorry.

Coincidentally, this is getting posted on the day I'll be coming home from NoLa, so I'll arrive just in time to hear you all say how much you now hate me. Yay. -_-

Banner By: The absolutely amazing @mrsbuckybarnes1917!

Thank you to all those who have been reading; if you like what you've read, likes, comments, and reblogs give me life, and I truly appreciate them, and you!

Taglist: (Please let me know if you’d like to be added!) @jmeelee @cazellen @blackhawkfanatic @les-sel @marcswife21 @buckybarnessimpp @mrsbuckybarnes1917 @erelierraceala @hayjat @capswife @itsteambarnes @jupiter-107 @marygoddessofmischief @sebastians-love @learisa @lethallyprotected @rabbitrabbit12321 @buckybarnesandmarvel @fanfictiongirl77 @calwitch @fantasyfootballchampion @selella @jackiehollanderr @wintercrows @sashaisready @missvelvetsstuff @angelbabyyy99 @keylimebeag @maybefoxysouls @vicmc624 @sashaisready @j23r23 @wintercrows @crist1216 @cjand10 @doublejeon @pattiemac1

You weren’t sure how long you sat there, lost in the dark colors, the reflection of the moonlight over the water. The sound of the door opening broke through your thoughts, and you turned to see Bucky shuffle into the room. 

“Hey, sweets,” he said, toeing off his boots.

“Hey,” you said without emotion, turning your face back to  the painting.

“Whacha lookin’ at?” he asked, coming to sit next to you on the couch.

“Apology gift from Tony.”

“What’s he apologizing to you for?” God, you couldn’t even muster up the energy to be angry at him.

“Calling out your unhealthy obsession with Jade in front of the team,” you said, voice flat. 

“I do not have an unhealthy obsession with Vix,” Bucky said, annoyance coloring his words. “How many times do I have to tell you there’s nothing going on between the two of us before you start believing me.” 

“Maybe you should stop telling me there’s nothing and start actually acting like there’s nothing,” you said as you stood up. “Because honestly, I’m tired of hearing your empty words.” You began to walk away, but Bucky reached out and grabbed your arm.

“They aren’t empty, Pocket!” he said. His voice wasn’t loud, but it filled the room as if he’d shouted. “It fucking hurts like hell to hear you say that.”

“Oh, I’m so sorry.” You couldn’t help the sarcasm that oozed from your voice now. “Your feelings are hurt now, so that changes everything. Let me put aside the pain I’ve been dealing with for months to reassure you.” You yanked your hand free from his grasp. “I’m exhausted, Bucky. Nothing is getting better. In fact, things are getting worse, and I keep pretending that I can be okay with things, but you just keep picking her over me, time and time again. I don’t deserve that. Not from someone who’s supposed to love me.”

“Pick her over you? That’s fucking bullshit and you know it,” he said, voice rising.

“Is it?” you asked him. You pointed to the corner where your overnight bags sat waiting for a trip you’d never take. “Is that bullshit, Bucky? Cause we were supposed to be in the Catskills right now, but because that fucking cunt came crying for you, you went running to her and left me sitting here, alone and forgotten. Again.”

“Pocket,” Bucky ran a hand over the back of his neck, a sure sign you were ruffling him. “She needed someone to support her. She’s not like you– she doesn’t–”

“Oh, shut the fuck up, Barnes!” you interrupted, shouting now. “I’m trying to tell you that I’m breaking up with you because of her and you still just stand there and defend her!”

Bucky’s face paled and his eyes went wide. “No,” he said, his voice barely audible.

“What?” You weren’t sure you heard him.

“I said ‘no,’” he said, his voice louder, but still soft. “You're not breakin' up with me. Doll, please. I need you. You said you were gonna fight for us, fight for me. That’s what you said!”

“I’m so tired of fighting for you when you’re off fighting for her! I can’t do this anymore, Bucky,” you practically sobbed. “You are fucking destroying me and feel like you just. don’t. care. I can’t just sit here and let it keep happening. You say you need me, but you’ve made it clear time and time again that you don’t give a shit about what I need. Every time I’ve asked you to put a boundary between you and Carthage, you’ve stomped right over it. And I can’t keep living like this. Yesterday was supposed to be a celebration of one of the greatest accomplishments of my career, and she ruined it.”

“It wasn’t her fault she got bad intel!” Bucky shouted.

“Could you just FUCKING STOP?!” you screamed. “Stop defending her! She either royally fucked up or she set them up on purpose! Those are the only two options! Either way, the entire thing was her fault. Rhodey is unconscious– almost died– because of her! She’s got you so wrapped around her fucking finger that you can’t even see it, and I am SO. GOD. DAMNED. OVER. IT! You promised me you’d make it up to me,” you continued shouting at him. “You fucking promised! But as soon as she bats her lashes, your promises don’t mean shit! You keep making excuses, you keep saying you’re sorry, but you keep doing the same fucking thing over and over again, and the only thing your actions are promising is that she means more to you than I do!”

“That’s not true!” he shouted back at you. “You mean more to me than anything!”

“I don’t fucking believe you!” you screamed, your voice going hoarse.

“I’ll fucking prove it to you!” He grabbed your elbows and pulled you to him, kissing you with such force it would have knocked you over if he hadn’t been holding you up. The moment he broke the kiss for air, you slapped him across the face. Only to immediately kiss him again.

Within seconds, you were ripping at each other’s clothes, desperate to feel one another, skin to skin, your tongues battling against each other as though whomever could dominate the kiss could win your fight. Bucky literally tore your shirt in half before you pushed him down onto your bed. Crawling on top of him, you scratched your nails down his chest, hard enough to draw blood.

Bucky hissed into your mouth, reaching down to yank off his pants and boxer briefs. You hastily pulled them down and off his legs before climbing back up to his mouth. Your kisses were passionate, angry and feral, each of you trying to prove a point to the other. 

You felt both of Bucky’s hands grasp the waistband of your jeans and rip them open, sending the button and zipper teeth flying. “Those were my favorite fucking jeans,” you warned.

“I’ll buy you another pair,” he growled, shoving a hand into your panties and finding your clit. You arched your back as he pinched and rolled it between his fingers, the aggression in his movements igniting your blood. You gasped as he shoved two fingers into you while simultaneously flipping you so you were now on your back and he loomed above you.

He pulled his hand from you, leaving you aching and empty. He kissed you as he divested you of what was left of your jeans and your panties. “Taste yourself,” he said, shoving his fingers into your mouth. You sucked on them, savoring the tang of your essence on his skin. Bucky groaned at the sight before pulling his fingers out and kissing you again. 

“You’re mine,” he growled, grabbing at your breasts and roughly kneading the flesh. “Look at me, Pocket. You’re mine.” You turned your head away, not wanting to meet his eyes, but Bucky would have none of it. Gripping your chin tight enough to leave a bruise, he yanked your head back so you were looking him in the eye. “I said, you’re mine.” He entered you then, the force of it nearly splitting you in half. “You’re mine and I’m fucking yours. Forever.”

He pounded into you as if his very life depended on it, and you clutched at his shoulders for dear life. “God, yes, Bucky,” you cried, all your resolve finally leaving you as the pleasure rose within you. “I’m yours, and you’re mine. Only mine. Only fucking mine!”

With a roar, Bucky picked up one of your legs and draped it over his shoulder, the new angle allowing him to hit you deeper as he drove into you. His thrusts were punishing, as though he were trying to see just how deep he could get himself inside of you before you actually broke in two.

"You like that?" he murmured as he rutted his hips into you.

"Fuck, yes, please, Bucky-- just like that," you moaned. He had you close. So, so close. "Keep going."

"Yeah, I thought so, you dirty slut," he grunted.

"What?" you asked, pulling your head back into the pillow so you could stare at him, wide-eyed as he continued to pound relentlessly into you. His words had taken you aback-- this was not something your loving boyfriend had ever said to you before. You dropped one leg from around his waist and tried to pull the other from his shoulder.

"Knew you loved taking my cock. God, you're such a filthy whore for me."

"Bucky, stop." You pushed gently against his chest, but he was already so far gone to his lust that he didn't seem to hear you.

"Such a good fucktoy for me," he grunted, his pace quickening as he neared his release. You felt your breath coming hard and fast now, but not from your impending climax, which had died with his words, but from an oncoming anxiety attack. “You goin’ dumb on me already, like a good little cockslut?”

Flashes of your miserable childhood flickered through your head, the way Darren would call you his "good little money-making whore" after you'd been raped by yet another of his clients, or when he decided to violate you himself, calling you his own personal slut, his special fuck toy.

"Bucky," you shouted, punching him with your fists, desperate now to get him off you, out of you. "Stop! Get off of me! GET OFF OF ME!" You screamed, thrashing at him. You saw the moment your words registered-- his eyes lost their haze of lust and his hips stopped pumping into you.

"Doll?" he asked, looking down on you in confusion. "What's wr--"

"Get off me, get off me, get off me!" you shrieked as you rolled out from under him, your entire body suddenly on fire with shame and disgust. The second your feet hit your bedroom floor, you were reaching for your silk robe, wrapping yourself in it as though the thin fabric could protect you from his words. From him.

"Pocket," Bucky watched your movements, his eyes betraying his bewilderment at your actions. "What's going on? What did I do?"

"Why would you call me that?" you asked, your words coming out in between your desperate gasps for air. "Why would you say those things?"

Bucky sat up, reaching for you, but you moved away from him. "Baby, what things? What did I s--" Realization dawned on him then, and his entire face fell. "Shit. Oh, God. Oh, Pocket. Sweetheart, I am so sorry. I didn't think--"

"Why would you say that, Bucky?" you asked, fighting back the tears that so desperately wanted to break free. "You've never called me a-a-..." you couldn't even get the word out. "How could you do that?"

"Fuck, Baby..." Bucky began, running his hands through his hair in response to your distress, "I never... I thought you'd like it. I should have realized, after Darren..."

"Don't say his name!" You hadn't meant to shout at him, but you were damned if you were going to invite the ghost of your tormentor into the sanctuary of your room. "Please," you cried, "don't say his name."

Bucky got up and tried to wrap his arms around you, but you pulled away, feeling too vile, too dirty, to even let him touch you.

"Sweetheart, please," he began, reaching for you again, "you're shaking. Let me hold you." You shook your head as you moved away from him yet again, trying to steady yourself.

"Where did that even come from, Bucky? Why would you think... What would even make you think that was something I would want?"

Bucky's hand went to rub the back of his neck as he looked up at you from behind his lashes. "I... I heard girls... like that sort of thing. That it turns them on."

"You can't just start it out of nowhere," you cried, "It's something you need to agree on first! You can't just say it without making sure your partner's okay with it! And I can't believe you'd ever think I would be okay with it! God, who even told you that?" You couldn't imagine any of Bucky's friends saying something like that to him; hell, Steve would have a coronary before even suggesting it. Did he read about it in some degrading kink group online?

"I was talking to Vix, and she said--"

"You what?" you spun to face him, your words sharp in your shock.

"Vixen. Jade. I was talking to her during training one time and she said girls like it when guys talk to them like that during sex. Well, she said she likes it. Said it, uh, turns her on."

Your entire body froze as if you'd been doused with ice water. "You were talking to Jade Carthage about sex and what gets her off." Your voice was hard and clipped. It wasn't even a question, just a statement that made your stomach twist, but you had to make sure you had understood him correctly.

"Well, when you say it like that, it sounds bad," Bucky hemmed, "but sweets, I swear, it wasn't like that."

You called for FRIDAY to turn up the lights, no longer wanting to be trapped in the intimacy of the semi-darkness with him.

"It wasn't like that? Then please enlighten me, Bucky, what was it like? Jesus, how did you two even stumble into that conversation in the first place?"

"Baby," Bucky looked frantic as he grabbed his boxer briefs from the floor and tugged them back on, "I don't even remember how we got on the subject. We were sparring and I pinned her and--"

"You had a conversation about sex while you were lying on fucking top of her?" You could barely contain your rage; you were seething, about to vibrate out of your skin with revulsion.

"Honey, it's not that big of a deal, really."

"Not that big of a deal?" you asked, knowing you were about to tread into some very dangerous territory, but needing him to understand you. "So, it wouldn't be that big of a deal if I let Steve get on top of me and had him tell me what gets him hard? What makes him come?"

Bucky's jaw tightened immediately at the mention of Steve. "Don't," he growled. "Do not bring him into this. It's completely different."

"It's not, Bucky! It's a thousand times worse! God," you threw your arms above your head as you began to pace in front of your bed. "I can't tell if you're actually this naive or if you think I'm fucking stupid."

"I don't think you're stupid, Pocket," Bucky's voice was quieter now, more restrained. "I... God, I just messed up. I'm an idiot. I didn't think it through and..." He trailed off and slumped onto the edge of the bed, his hands pushed into his hair as he stared down at the floor.

You could see his muscles craving to pull you back into his arms, but he resisted. His eyes flickered to you before darting away again, like looking at you caused him physical pain.

"Do you want to sleep with her? Were you imagining her while you were fucking me?" It was a reckless question to ask--a question that you didn’t want the answer to--but it slipped out before you could stop it.

Bucky's head whipped up, his eyes wide with shock as he stared at you. "What? No!" He stood abruptly, hands outstretched towards you. "Baby, no! God, no! I would never... I can't even believe you'd think... Don't even talk like that."

"But you took her kinks, her turn ons, and you brought them into our bed. You spoke words you knew another woman-- a woman you know I fucking loathe-- wanted to hear, you... you used them on me, knowing my history, and you didn't give a shit about what saying them might do to me!" Your voice was trembling with accusation, your body shaking with tremors of hurt and betrayal.

"No! No, sweetheart... it wasn't like that." He kept repeating himself, his words rushed, his face pale with shock and regret. "I didn't mean to disrespect you like that. I heard her say it and I thought... I mean, she's a woman too, right? So, if she liked it, I thought maybe you..." He trailed off, his expression one of sheer desperation as he tried to find the right words.

"But I'm not her. It wasn’t about pleasing me; it was about using what pleases her." You shook your head harshly, a lump forming in your throat. "You don't even see how wrong that is. And you shouldn't even have been having the conversation with her in the fucking first place!"

"What can I do?" Bucky pleaded, his voice a strained whisper as he raked his fingers through his hair again. His face was etched with pain, regret seeping from every pore of him. "How can I fix this? Tell me how to make it right."

But you were too overcome by anger and heartbreak to think straight. You moved further away from him, wrapping your arms around yourself as if you were trying to shield your heart from further damage.

“What did you tell her?” you asked, but Bucky looked at you with confusion etched across his face. “You said it was a conversation. I’m assuming she didn’t do all the talking. What did you talk about? Did you tell her what gets you off? What you like? Were you sharing intimate details about our sex life with a complete outsider? Did you tell her about your ‘sergeant’ kink?”

He didn’t need to speak for you to read the truth in the expression on his face.

The silence hung in the room, heavy and oppressive, as Bucky fought for words. A nerve twitched in his jaw, the only movement in his otherwise frozen face. After a moment of uncomfortable silence, he finally spoke.

"I... Yes, I did," he admitted, his voice a mere whisper. "I didn't think it through. I didn't mean to... I just..."

His voice trailed off again and he sunk back onto the bed, looking completely defeated. His hands covered his face as if he were desperate to hide himself from your accusing gaze.

“Get out.” You couldn’t even stand to look at him. This was a betrayal beyond anything you’d ever have expected from him. 

Bucky’s head snapped up at your words, his eyes wide with shock. He opened his mouth to speak, but no words came out. He just sat there on the edge of the bed, staring at you as though he was seeing you for the first time.

"Get out," you repeated, each word a dagger. "I can't... I can't stand to even look at you right now."

Still, Bucky didn’t move. He just sat there in stunned silence, his face pale and his eyes filled with regret.

"I said get out!" Your voice was shrill, filling the room with a chilling echo that seemed to reverberate through every fiber of your being.

Bucky flinched at your tone, and finally roused himself to his feet. He looked at you one last time, his steel-blue eyes so full of pain that it made your heart ache despite everything. For a moment, it seemed like he might say something else, like he might try to explain, but you’d had enough of his ‘explanations’ for the evening. Hell, maybe for the rest of your life.

Bucky swallowed hard, his eyes filling with a mixture of fear and dread as he nodded slowly. "Okay... yeah," he stammered. "I'll give you some space."

“No. I can’t do this anymore. I’m done, Bucky. This… this is unforgivable. We’re finished.”

"Doll," he breathed, the pet name he had given you sounding like a prayer on his lips, but a curse to your ears. "I love you... I'm sorry. I messed up, I know. But I love you."

“I don’t believe you.” You felt like your heart was being ripped apart as you watched him standing there, consumed by remorse. You had never seen him like this before, his usual charismatic confidence replaced with fearful uncertainty.

“Just go,” you whispered, turning away so you wouldn't have to see the pain in his eyes. You felt a sob rising in your throat, but you held it back, refusing to let it out while he was still there.

With every inch of him screaming resistance, Bucky walked over to the door and hesitated at the threshold. "I'll... I'll do anything to make this right, sweetheart," he promised, his voice choked with emotion. "I'll fix this... We can fix this."

But you remained silent, your back still turned to him as you tried desperately to keep your tears at bay. The sound of the door opening and closing behind him was deafening in its finality.

You wrapped your arms around yourself tighter, suddenly feeling cold. The room was suddenly too big, too empty without Bucky's reassuring presence. You sunk onto the bed, burying your head in your hands as the events of the night washed over you with overwhelming force as you began to sob in earnest.

You weren't even sure what you were angriest about. He’d broken yet another promise and left you waiting, your romantic getaway forgotten so he could be by her side. He'd called you a slut and a whore. He’d discussed your sex life with Jade-- the one woman you hated above all others, and openly discussed her kinks with her, and his own desires in return. He'd forced her kinks on you without your consent.

And then there was the worst part of it all, the bit that made you feel sick and hollow: he'd failed to see what he'd done wrong.

You had thought Bucky knew you better, that he respected you more than this. You'd shared secrets and fears with him, things you'd never shared with anyone else, not even Tony. He knew your past, knew how much trust meant to you - knew how difficult it had been for you to open your vulnerabilities up to something more than just casual sex - and yet he'd violated that trust in such a profound way.

This was just beyond anything else that had come before it. You couldn’t see a way to move forward after this.

Numbly, you began to strip off the sheets from the bed, your hands shaking as you balled them up and threw them into a corner of the room. You couldn't sleep on them now, nor ever again. You couldn't bear the thought of lying down where he'd... where he'd...

Tears started to spill down your cheeks as the reality of what had happened set in. You tried to blink them away, tried to swallow down the lump in your throat. But it was too late. Tears blinded you as you moved through your space on muscle memory alone, grabbing a garbage bag from under the sink in the kitchenette and shoving the offending sheets into it to dispose of later. Boiling them in chlorine wouldn't be able to relieve them of the taint they now carried.

Once the offending sheets were securely bagged and out of sight, you stumbled your way into the bathroom. Turning the shower on as hot as it would go, you stripped from your robe and stepped under the scalding stream from the waterfall shower head.

Hissing as the water hit your body, you let yourself succumb to your emotions. You reached for your loofah and began scrubbing at your skin, doing everything in your power to wash away the intense feeling of shame that had permeated deep under your dermis. You scrubbed until your skin was red, until it was raw and cracked and bleeding, but it offered you no relief.

The sensations were familiar, the burning heat, the stinging of newly torn flesh. It had been so long since you had felt the need to ritually cleanse yourself like this, you had desperately hoped you'd finally found yourself beyond the need to do so, but just a few words from Bucky's mouth had sent you reeling backwards, back to being that worthless, vile, used up girl that no number of college degrees, fancy company titles, or board-approved computer programs could fully erase. It was in your DNA, and you couldn't escape it. You scrubbed and scrubbed until time had lost meaning.

<- Previous Part / Next Part ->

[icypopz]

caught in 4k ♡

↬ request from anon ; I love your writing for blue lock and i was wondering if you could write a Rin x actress reader when they're adults and they get caught by the media somehow. ↬ notes ; itoshi rin x gn reader ↬ from ice ; pretends like i haven't been gone for months... anyways here's my grand comeback that literally no one asked for but this req was so cute i rlly wanted to write it 🥹 hope u enjoy ! ↬ warning(s) ; none

please reblog w comments ! it helps a lot :)

itoshi rin has always been a private person. he rarely shares anecdotes from his life with his friends, let alone the paparazzi. his fans constantly complain that they're starved for content, because despite the fact that he's one of the most famous football players in the world, he somehow manages to keep his schedule entirely under wraps and often downright refuses to do interviews. (the only way to get him on camera is to invite him for a joint interview with sae.)

his tendency to keep his personal life a secret is exactly why it comes as such a shock when it's revealed that he's dating you.

actually, 'revealed' is the wrong word to use when in reality, the both of you were spotted leaving a popular restaurant together by a pesky journalist. he snapped pictures of rin holding your hand, offering you his jacket, opening the car door for you... and the next morning they were all over the internet, splashed across the front page of all the major news websites. #itoshi rin is in a relationship?! was the number one trending topic for days.

the amount of attention showered upon the two of you is actually unsurprising, considering how you've been at the peak of fame ever since you recently took on a role that went viral. pair that with the fact that you're dating the most mysterious football player? it's a miracle they didn't hear about it in space! both your fanbases were gushing about how adorable you are together and they're always eager for crumbs of interaction between you two in public.

in private, rin groans and grumbles about how annoying it is to have a spotlight shining on your dating life, but he's secretly happy that you both don't have to hide your relationship anymore now that it's out in the open. he likes the idea that everyone knows he's yours, and you're his.

in public, he's as aloof and cold as ever to every enthusiastic interviewer that dares cross his path. the only time he visibly softens is when they mention you, and a hint of a smile will curve his lips. rin gets angry if they even imply that you're leeching off his fame, or you're a gold-digger, or you're trying to get close to his brother through him - he never fails to set the record straight immediately. the two of you love each other, and maybe these journalists' time would be better spent trying to find someone to love them instead of trying to ruin someone else's relationship. (his pr manager is at her wits' end).

overall, rin is not too bothered by the fact that your relationship ended up becoming public knowledge. of course he would have preferred it to be on both of your terms, but now that it's happened he just rolls with it. as long as you're happy, he's happy.

help i swear i'll be active now HAHAHA i won't disappear for a year again ,,, and btw i cannot believe my last post was over a year ago tf

✧ thank you for reading ! if you have a request, feel free to send it in 🌠 © icypopz 2023. do not repost or modify in any way.

[choism]

Choism's Kinktober 2023 | t.d.wl

dom!trafalgar law x afab!reader

Impregnation Kink: Being sexually aroused by the idea of impregnating someone ; getting someone pregnant turns you on, having an impregnation kink

Genre: smut, fluff

Word Count: 1k

Warnings: impreg kink (duh), breeding kink, unprotected sex (dont), fingering, making out, slight body worship, lots of dirty talk, petnames: baby, sweetheart, slight mommy kink? kind of, mating press, kind of feral sex

A/N: Hello and welcome to the first fic of kinktober! I decided to post this one first because as most of you know, I have been so feral for this man lately. I hope you all enjoy!!! Remember to leave feedback in the tags by reblogging <3

CHOISM'S KINKTOBER 2023 MASTERLIST

Today had been a long day for the crew. A long battle that had lasted seemingly forever taking up all of your energy and causing you to feel drained once back on the submarine. All you wanted was to take a shower and curl up in bed with your beloved captain, for a well deserved rest. But Law had other plans for you. 

You enter his quarters after washing up and see he’s relaxing on his bed. You dry off and slip on one of his shirts, plopping yourself next to him, “Today was a lot,” You mumble into his neck, kissing it and pulling away. “What do you wanna do before we go to bed? I was gonna play some games with the rest of the crew but it seems like we are all too tired.”

Law lays back and pulls you on top of him, hugging you tightly. “I dunno, just want you tonight.” He kisses along your neck. “We had a long day… We should just relax more.” You melt into his touch as his hands roam your body underneath your shirt, smoothing up and down your sides.

“Well, what did you have in mind?” You giggle and kiss him on the lips, setting a slow, intimate pace. Law moves so the both of you can sit up, each other's lips not leaving until he pulls apart to take off his shirt. Law kisses from your lips down to your chin, then down your neck. He lifts up your shirt a bit and you take the hint, pulling away to take it off. He takes a second to eye your torso,

“Just want to make love to you baby, let me take care of you.” Even though you have been together a while now, you feel your heart flutter. Law flips your positions so you are on bottom and he’s positioned on top. Leaning down to take a few pecks, he lifts back up and reaches over to grab the lube he stashes in his nightstand, squirting a fair amount in his fingers and warming it up. Law uses his other hand to take off your underwear as you lift your legs to help. He discards them somewhere to the side before he leans down to your center, pecking a kiss over your clit then leaning back up. You shiver under his touch and feel his thick fingers prod at your entrance, lubing up your hole before slowly entering two fingers. 

You let out a gasp at the welcome intrusion, feeling his fingers fill you up. Law leans forward and kisses your chest, suckling and biting and leaving hickeys everywhere to show off his love for you. You writhe and moan beneath him as he fucks his fingers into you, soon adding a third to open you up properly and prepare you for his cock. Law licks a stripe up your neck and kisses you once again, deeply, before pulling out his fingers, 

“Gonna fill you up so good sweetheart, wanna make you feel good.” 

Law back up to take off his boxers, his large cock springing free from its confines and bouncing towards his stomach. His tip already flush and leaking precum, he spreads it around before pouring some lube onto it, spreading it down his shaft. You observe as he jerks himself off slowly, preparing to enter you. “Ready for me?” He asks gently, pecking you on the lips.

“Yes, please Law I need you.” Law smiles at you, lining up with your hole and entering slowly, making you feel nice and full. You both moan out at the sensation in tandem. He rocks in and out of you shallowly, letting you get used to the feeling of his cock. You wrap your arms around his neck and lightly claw at his nape, the feeling of him stretching you out so good.

He kisses your forehead before moving more fluidly, now fucking you deeper, slower. You let out little moans as he works you open. Over time his thrust quickened, not too fast but just enough to get you to see stars, rolling out that heat that’s started to build in your abdomen.

“Can’t wait to fill you up, fuck you full of my cum.” He groans in your ear as he fucks into you deeper, “God, you’re so perfect, want to fill you with babies so bad.” He moans louder and lifts your legs over his shoulder now, his hips pressing deeper into your pelvis. You don’t know where this is coming from, but you like it. You moan loudly as he fucks harder, more feral now.

Law places his hand over your stomach and presses down so you can feel his cock hit near your cervix with each thrust. “I bet you would look so good as a mommy, filled up with my cum huh? Want me to make you a mommy? Fuck you full with my kids?” His filthy words bring you closer to your orgasm. Law brings your lifted legs forward to your chest, pressing down hard with his body and locking you into a mating press.

“Fuck Law, please it feels so good, wanna be a mommy, want your kids,” You moan out in overwhelming pleasure, his hips rocking into you relentlessly feels so good. 

“Gonna cum, want to cum inside of you.” He pants out, hips never slowing. You can feel your orgasm creep up, a white hot flame building in you about to burst. It builds and builds until you still and feel it pulse, you cum on his cock and you cum hard. A few more thrusts and he follows soon after, spilling inside of you. It feels like it goes on forever, it’s so hot and wet you feel like it’ll never stop but it feels so good that you don’t want it to stop. 

Law soon pulls out of you, the mixture of cum dripping your of your hole and onto the sheets below, “Fuck, you’re so good for me baby, that was so good.” He gets up to grab a towel and clean up the mess the two of you made. He comes back soon and gets to work quickly so the two of you can change back into your pajamas and sleep soundly.

© Choism 2023. do not repost or translate.

[idkmynameiskat]

you act like a nice person but you never respond to my messages

I CANNOT do this with y'all anymore. Why are half of you guys so fucking parasocial?

Let me set this straight for you people who think "I owe you" a message back or a response to your ask.

If I don't message you back, here are some reasons why:

I'm a fucking human, do you want me to show you how many messages I get a day and sometimes all at once? I literally have 200 messages just sitting in my inbox right now that have accumulated over the last year or so, and that's not even including the DM's I get daily. How is anyone supposed to possibly respond to every message unless this is their full time job?

If you are constantly trying to turn our conversations into something "sexual" or "flirty" even though I never reciprocate, I will just stop responding. I'm not fucking dumb. I'm a person who wants genuine friendships with genuine people, not someone who thinks I'm stupid enough to not realize what they're trying to do.

If you get upset or "mad" that I don't respond to your message in a few hours, you will absolutely not receive a response back, and if you keep acting upset, I will simply block you. I only have 3 people blocked, and 2 of them are because they were genuinely upset I took "too long" and had the audacity to try to make me feel bad about it. I don't owe anyone anything, and that includes a response to a message, no matter how much of a "nice guy" you think you're being.

If you only ever message me when I post a "sexy" selfie or post something about being horny, I won't respond. Again, I'm not dumb. I notice what you're trying to do.

Sometimes, I just don't want to have a conversation. Period. Whether that's on Tumblr or in real life, I am entitled to using my own free time however I want. And sometimes I just want to look and reblog dumb posts on here.

Sometimes, you guys are genuinely creepy. And simply put, no one should have to deal with that.

[that-one-anxious-mango]

Hi love! I hope you are feeling/doing better! I was just thinking about the Days of Our Love series. Any chance we might get an update soon? I miss it!

Oh, New York. How I Love You. (1)

Summary: Austin's best girl comes to visit him in New York to cherish the time they have together before he leaves to Australia, in what becomes a very eventful two weeks together.

Word count: 8.2k

Warning: LONG POST!

Contents: Lots of fluff. Mentions of childhood trauma. Sexual Content (Oral: Fem receiving, hand job: Male Receiving), emotional situations.

A/N: Hello beautiful humans, it has been a minute. Don't drag me please. I just always take so long because I want to always put out the best content. Would you believe me if I said this went through TWO edits. Geez! But all in all, I hope you enjoy.

PS: Everyone feel free to comment, send more letter, and reblog! Much Love *hugs* Tags: @purejasmine, @wacoshuffle , @flyestvenustrap , @louisejoy86 , @unicoreads, @incorectly

______

“ Are you seriously going to take all of that to New York with you? Why don’t you just take one suitcase and then buy some outfits to wear there, ya’ know. “ Phoebe chirped from her spot laid out across your bed while flipping through a HG magazine. 

“ I agree. Buy some cute outfits and surprise him that way. Then you’ll have room to bring back the clothes you buy for you and us.” Alex continued to play a riveting game of tug of war with Magnus on the floor.

Her last comment made a laugh erupt from you in the closet, “ Yeah nice try, buddy. I’m not bringing you heifers anything back but some damn keychains and the lasting scent of the smug and smoggy New York air on me the next time we see each other.” You yelled back. “ And plus it’s gonna be cold outside.” 

Phoebe laughed while Alex scoffed, “ UM! Excuse me ma’am, but as a friend, need I remind your ass that this was a part of the deal. Since you’re abandoning me, The Travel Buddy, to go FORNICATE with Mr. Goldilocks in New York instead of HOME with me for the Winter Wonderland Festival. You promised to bring me back something nice to add to my outfit for the Warner Bros. charity event next month.” She recalled the promise that you did in-fact make to cease her tantrum at the time. 

“ And on top of that, I’m also the one silk pressing your hair for this trip, ma’am. AND taking care of my fur nephew that you’re abandoning as well. Therefore,  I DESERVE SOMETHING.” She added. 

“ This is true.” Phoebe co-signed, continuing to flip through the pages. 

You cut your eyes at her when you entered the room again to walk a pair of shoes over to your bursting suitcase.

“ Yeah. Yeah. I’ll make sure to bring you back something for your pain and suffering. Brat.” You muttered the last part. “ AND fyi his hair is black now.” 

Alex grinned while blowing you an air kiss that you grab and pretend to smush in your hands. 

“ You know you LUHHHHH me, girl.” She teased. “ Now hurry up because I don’t have all night to do this. I don’t know why you didn’t just get braids or some passion twists put in like a normal person going on a trip .” 

“ What’s love got to do with it?” You sassed. In return you were met with a pillow to the side and giggles around the room. “ And don’t rush me! I’m almost done.” 

“ What time is Austin supposed to be coming to get you from the airport? Phoebe questioned. 

“ Noon.” You answered fighting to try and fit a scarf into your luggage. “ My flight leaves at noon and I should be there by evening. I’m not exactly sure when, I just know their three hours ahead. 

“ Okay. Cool, just make sure you let us know when you’re in the car and everything. “ Phoebe noted.

You scoff, “Like yall asses won’t be watching me on 360 anyway. Stalkers.” 

“ Hey! You should be happy that somebody cares enough to stalk your ass. People go missing everyone, B.” Alex mocked the line from Paid in Full. 

“ Yeah. I know. I do the same thing with ya’ll.” You huffed, “ Okay. I think that’s it.” 

“ Good! “ Alex jumped up, “ Now go and grab my hair bag. So we can start on this head, honey. All this dang hair.” She looked at the long blow dried mess on your head. 

“ I know damn well that is not a damn hot comb.” You deadpanned. 

“ Do you want the hair straight or not? We have heat protectant, so relax. Whenever we both get back I’ll come over and we can do a treatment to make sure your curls revert back right. I got this. Now tilt your head down..” 

Phoebe giggled watching the two of you fuss at one another, “ Yeah you better sleep pretty tonight, babes. Head on hands, silk scarf, and turn a fan on so you don’t sweat.”

“ I'm aware.” You sighed, settling into the chair and began to listen to Phoebe as she started her descent into her plans while you would be away.

“ OW! ” You jumped at the sudden sharp burning feeling on your scalp, “ Alex really.”

“ I barely touched you! It’s the steam.” She giggled at the scrunch on your face, “ Hehe. My bad.” 

______

The Next Day…

After a couple goodbyes to your fur baby and helping your driver wrestle your large suitcase into the back of the car Austin had sent for you against your wishes, you found yourself tiredly weaving about through LAX. 

You’d already pre-checked everything, so once you went through security and went to make sure your gate existed, you’d found a very overpriced coffee place and ordered a little danish and iced chai to settle the nerves.

It wasn’t until you were in a seat by the terminal happily scrolling away on your phone that you got a text message from Austin. 

Sweet Baboo: can’t wait to see you. enjoy your flight. love you. :3

Once you boarded, the flight had been fine and you’d done exactly what was predicted of you.

You’d read for a good couple of hours and then slept a good chunk of the rest of it. The flight was smooth with no delays.

When the pilot announced your descent, anticipation began to build up in your chest

Quickly you pulled out the mini mirror from your carry on bag and went to fix your minimal makeup and undid the head scarf on your head to reveal the flowy silk press that fell down your shoulders. You combed it out and fixed your little cute airport outfit in preparation to get off.

Seeing as you were in first class, against your wishes also,  you were one of the first to exit the plane. You made it to baggage claim where a nice older gentleman with a sign had begun setting your luggage up for you on a cart and offered to push it down to the terminal.

“ For Miss Y/L/N.” He’d smiled.

“ Yes, I’m her.” You nodded. 

“ Wonderful I’ll be helping you with your luggage. Compliments of a Mr. Sweet Baboo.” He told you with a grin on his face.

You stifled a part of your laugh as the two of you began walking through the airport, “ Did he really ask you to say that? “ 

He nodded, “ Yes, He did. But I don’t mind. One of the more milder things I’ve been asked to say in my time doing this job.” 

“ I can only imagine.” You laughed. 

“ Quite cold outside. But you look bundled up.” The man smiled.

“ Oh yeah. It’s the Sahara in here. I think the breeze will actually help cool me down.” 

The sharp chill of the evening wind swiped at the little exposed patches of your face as you made it to the extremely congested pick up and drop off area. It felt near impossible to try and find which car belonged to your boyfriend in the sea of what felt like a thousand black SUVs littering the street.

It wasn’t until you spotted a familiar head of slicked back raven hair stuck out one window that you recognized your boyfriend as he made his way out the car.

A squeal unintentionally left you and Austin smiled a mile wide as he opened his arms up to you, “ There’s my girl.” He laughed, catching your body that was flung into him. “ Hey there. Mr. Sweet Baboo.” You giggled into his neck, placing a kiss there.

He’d taken his time unlatching you from him until he offered to quickly help the man load the trunk since he’d spotted what he believed to be the shine of a camera in the distance. 

You didn’t have time to breathe once you both were inside and the door shut. The partition was already rolled up and once the car started to move, and so did Austin’s lips against yours. Your body had suddenly felt like it was on fire with a flame that only he could put out. 

Your hands were attached to his face while his own were free to roam the parts of your body he’d missed in his absence. 

A small moan escaped you at the sensation of his hand kneading your thigh under his touch and pulling you further into him to the point of being in his lap now. 

“ Fuck, I missed you, Baby.” He groaned.

“ Not as much as I missed you.” You mumbled in-between kisses, hands feverishly grabbing at anything on his body that would keep him tethered to you. 

He smiled into your lips, “ Is that a challenge? Because believe me, before this car even hits the main streets I can prove that I missed you most.” He whispers, hand sliding to rest just under your abdomen. Your breath hitches and the most indecent thoughts begin to pool around in your brain. 

You giggled feeling his fingers sliding up your cardigan, “ Okay..okay..okay. I believe you.” 

“ I can’t wait to get you home, all to myself.” His words came out muffled, but had all the same effect as you found yourself pacing your breath and clenching your legs together. 

“ You look cold, sweetheart. Let me warm you up.” 

The ride had been agonizingly long with Austin teasing you every chance you got. 

When the two of you arrived at Austin’s brownstone, your eyes couldn’t register just how beautiful it looked from the outside. Almost like something you’d see in movies like Autumn in New York or Maid in Manhattan. 

“ Aus it’s beautiful.” You mumbled out taking in the glistening snow that littered the cement steps beyond the black steel gate.

“ Thank you. Can’t wait to get you inside of it.” He smiled, pecking your lips before getting out.

To your protests, he’d gotten all of your bags himself and took them inside as you huffed and whined, “ I wanna help! It’s my stuff. Aus! It’s too cold for you to be out here doing this by yourself.” 

“ Nope. Just get your cute ass in the house. ” You rolled your eyes at his smug grin.

The minute you stepped inside the foyer of the home Austin had literally swept you off your feet, dipping his face into your neck to administer kisses. 

You laugh and thrash in his arms the entire way to his gorgeous couch, ridding yourselves of your coats. 

“ So, first, “  He plopped down next to you, instantly reaching his arms out to pull your body into his lap. “ Are you hungry? I know you didn’t eat on the plane. And before we do anything else I wanna get you fed if need be.” 

“ No, not really. “ You leaned back against him, “ I think I’m just hyped up on the adrenaline of getting to see you.”

“ Yeah me too.” A finger traced along your neck just where your hair fell past, , “ Damn. Look at your hair. I knew it was long, but I’ve never seen it like this. It’s beautiful.” 

“ Thanks. I wanted something a little more manageable since our itinerary is a bit packed. It’s not big and unruly like usual.” You played with your ends. 

“ Stop it.” He scolded, “  Big? Yes. Unruly? No. I love your hair in its natural state babe. It’s cute. I love watching you take care of it. It reminds me to stay up on my shit.” 

“ Yeah, no 2 in 1 conditioner for you buddy.” You reached to pick at one of his dark locks close to his ear. It was still taking some getting used to. 

“ Hey.” He turned to nip at your hand, “ There wasn’t any 2 in 1 shampoo before you and there damn sure won’t be any now that I’ve been exposed to the good life.”

And a good life it was! You’d exposed Austin to all the skin care, shea butter, oil pulling, essential oils and everything else needed and now mysteriously you had products coming up empty all the time.

“ I know babe I’m just teasing. Excited for this weekend with you.” 

“ So am I. Gonna’ feel good spending time with my girl. Kinda miss my little buddy though. “

“ I know me too.” You pout, “ But I promise you he’s living his best life with his Aunt Alex. He’s already had a pup cup, two treats, and last I knew was taking a nap in her office on a pile of heated blankets.” 

“ You’re going home to a diva, baby.” He smirked, imagining the little dog buried in blankets fast asleep. “ So, back to this itinerary that was mentioned.” 

“ Yes! It goes by day to optimize experiences and time.“ You pronounced proudly, bouncing on the couch.

“ Really? “ 

“ Truly. I wanna make the most of our time together.” You replied. 

“ Okay, do tell. “ His eyebrows raised in amusement, “ What’s on today? “

“ Today’s agenda is light because it’s the first day and I already knew I’d be tired. So the only two major things on the list are having dinner with my Sweet Baboo and unpacking.” 

“ Nice! And we can make all that happen. Let’s take a look at the other days.” 

And you did, together you examined the well planned and thought out itinerary in front of you.

He nodded , “ Looks good. We may have to make a couple of adjustments if that’s okay with you. I have some surprises in store.” 

“ Ouuu! What?! Tell me.” You practically bounced in his lap. 

He smiled, “ If I told you it wouldn’t be a surprise then, would it.”

“ Not even a hint.” You whine, slightly puckering your lips, and playfully batting your mascaraed eyelashes. 

“ No. Nuh uh. Not gonna happen. But you’re cute though, baby.” He pecked your lips.

You groan, “ Fine! On second thought I am hungry. Feed me seymour.” You goofed trying to imitate the rich voice of Levi Stubbs. 

The lines of his lips curl, “ C’’mon then Audrey II. You can keep me company while I start dinner.” 

And you did just that perched on a chair at the island while the two of you made small talk.

“ That can’t be all.” He softly laughed, “ I haven’t seen you and I wanna really know how my girl is doing? Tell me. I know there's something.”

“ I mean there really isn’t much to tell, baby. I told you. It’s just been work..writing…Magnus..and missing you.”

“ How about that lease? “ Austin said, rolling out the dough in front of you.

Your shoulders tensed, “ What about it?” 

“ You talk to your building manager about whether you're renewing or not this spring, yet? ” He inquired about your plans for your apartment, which was really his not so subtle way of asking if you’d thought anymore about his offer to move in with him after Elvis was estimated to wrap this summer.

Although you and Austin had been together for almost six months at this point, you weren’t exactly sure if you were completely ready for that kind of commitment yet. Granted when the projected time of wrapping would come around the two of you would be coming up on a year, you still had some things holding you back about the whole ordeal.

“ It’s on the to - do - list…” You stretched, “One of the many adult things to eventually be handled.” 

“ Uh huh. I see. “ He mused,” Well like I said before. I wouldn’t mind coming home to you and Magnus every night. And when I’m home you're either always at my place or vice versa. In my eyes it would just make sense.” Austin explained. 

Your hands fidget with the brown place mat in front of you, “ I hear you and I understand, babe. And I promise I’m really taking all of this into heavy consideration. “ You settled. 

“ Good, I can live with that. Now get up, come over here and help me by cutting the sheath on these asparagus.” Austin instructed, while heating up his rosemary and pepper butter mix in his skillet.

Your eyes widened at the opportunity to help, while you could cook you were unashamed to say that you had hard limitations of what you could and couldn’t make. Whereas Austin on the other-hand was practically a chef with the way he could make his assortment of dishes. Which in turn made him the primary cook of the relationship while you were always happy to be captain of the clean up crew. 

“ Oh yay. I get to help.” You hopped up, “ And you're going to let me use a knife! Sick! “ 

Now becoming skeptical, Austin cocked his head rethinking his offer of a sous chef position, “ On second thought maybe you should stick to being my honorary taste tester. Quite good at that job, peaches.” 

“ Nope. I’m helping. “ You rolled up your sleeves, “ Now prepare to see some clean beautifully mutilated asparagus, babe. “ 

“ Jesus.” Austin groaned, placing the steaks in the sizzling pan.

______

Your dinner of sirloin, seared asparagus, garlic and herb mash potatoes, and bread you couldn’t pronounce right was absolutely splendid. 

And now being presented in-front of you was just the dessert to top the night off: A thick and nice slice of strawberry drizzled NY cheesecake.

Favorite of yours.

As you began to indulge in your sweet treat you teased yourself by wondering if there was any way the night could possibly get better. 

Then it hit you…you could knock one of your tomorrow's itenary items off tonight without any worry.

So, yes. It definitely could. 

“ You know what would be really good, right now.” You mused aloud at the island. 

Still turned Austin asked, “ And what would that be, sweetheart? “ He continued loading the dishwasher. 

“ A nice hot relaxing bath. “ 

“ Uh huh.“ He sounded

Grabbing the towel off the stove handle, Austin walked over to the island to lean in. 

“ Okay. “ He simply said, “ Your wish is my command.” 

“ Really? “ You nervously scraped your fork against your plate.

“ Of course. This trip  is all about you. So, if the best girl wants to end the evening with a bath. Then it’s my job to make it happen.” He washed his hands. 

“ Just stay here and finish your dessert. And then come up. Alright? “ He instructed, coming around to stand in front of you, taking your face into his face.

“ Okay. “ You nodded.

He returned the gesture and placed a chaste kiss to your forehead on his way out before heading upstairs. 

You could hear the faint sounds of water running as you struggled to calm your weirdly nervous stomach and finish your dessert. 

By the time you made it up stairs and into the bathroom the lights were dimmed and  the aroma of jasmine bath salts and vanilla bubble bath filled your senses.

You weren’t spooked when you felt him appear behind you. 

“ Let me take this off of you.” His fingers danced along the curves of your side as his hands moved along to lift your shirt over your head. 

You sucked in tiny breaths the rest of the time he took to undress you. Ever so often you’d catch his eyes and smile, turning away to blush.

Once you were as naked as the day you were born, he gently helped you step into the creme claw foot tub.

“ You wanna get in? “ You sheepishly grinned.   “ Plenty of room.” Kicking up your feet over the side to expose the suds and bubbles that dripped down your legs.

Knowing that he’d already restrained himself while helping you undress, Austin wasn’t too sure he’d be able to handle any accidental slips of the hand or touching by any means without immediately yanking you out the bath and into the bedroom for some extremely intentional touching of his own to you.

“ No, I’m okay. This is about you. So, enjoy your bath, babe.” He smiled leaning over to grab at the loofa.

, “ Stop it. You’re fine.” Austin playfully scolded, watching the pout spread on your face.

“ If you want we can both sit on opposite sides. “ You offered just as a lightbulb went off in your brain, “ OH! Or you could lay with your back against my chest and my arms around you like Vivan and Edward in Pretty Woman. I’ve actually always wanted to do that.” You confessed your little fantasy. 

“ Plus. You did say this weekend was about me.” You moved to place your hands on the tub and rest your head on them, “ And what I want right now is for you to come in here with me. Now,“ 

Austin’s cheeks warmed in affection and amusement as he watched a twinkle appear in your eye at the idea of getting to live out another one of your little rom-com fantasies. And how you’d suddenly gotten a bit bold in your request. 

He sat there for a moment contemplating when ultimately he decided who would he be if he couldn’t be the person to fulfill your fantasies and desires. 

He blew out air, “ Fine. I’ll be the Edward to your Vivan, babe. But just know the accidental touching and moving needs to be kept to a minimum. “ You watched as he stood up to pull his shirt above his head and shimmy his pants. “ I mean it. I am a man of virtue after all, honey. A delicate flower you could say. So, I expect to be treated as such.” He teased.

You didn’t have a smart remark to quip back at him because your mind and eyes had both been polluted with the images of him bare before you in all his glory.

Instead you mustered a playful cat call, “ Yeah take it off! Look at those cheeks! “ 

All Austin could do was smile and shake his head as he walked over and maneuvered himself to get in and sink in between your legs. Your arms found a home around his shoulders and your lips made quick work of placing innocent enough kisses to his skin in places you knew may be less…inflammatory than others.

And you could tell by the low and almost soulful groan Austin let out once he was fully  submerged in the calm of the warm water that this was something he needed too. “ Feels good..” He mumbled letting his head back to rest in the valley of your naked breasts. 

“ Good.” You replied, as you too were enjoying the warm intimacy of the atmosphere. 

“ We don’t do this enough at home.” Austin sounded as you used the soft silicone loofah to scrub and wash his chest.

“ What? “

“ Relaxing…soaking like this.” He rubbed at your knee that was exposed out of the water. 

 “ I agree.” 

“ So..” He squeezed the sponge he’d grabbed and dipped into the water on your back, “ You excited for tomorrow? “

You nodded, “ I am. I’ve visited here once on a family trip and another time for a work thing. But I’ve always felt like I’ve never gotten the true experience. And since Aunt Kiki lives here now I’ve been wanting to visit her. But of course she’s away on a work trip this time of year.”

“ Mhmm.” A hum can from Austin as you move your hand lower.

“ Watch yourself.” Austin mumbled, grabbing that hand to interlock it with his. 

And you did, you made it a point to keep your hands clear of the southern equator of your man. That was until you felt him let guard with a sigh and push back into you. 

This was the moment you took your opportunity.

A breath hitched, “ Y/N…what are you doing? I thought I made it very clear the stipulations of this arrangement. “ 

You crane your head down to rest your lips just above the shell of his ear as your hand continues to move toward its desired destination. 

He tensed against you when you went to lightly grip at his now half-hard cock in your hand. You moved it up and down a bit before stopping and using the pad of your thumb to quickly run across his tip.

Involuntarily Austin lets out a small hiss at the sensation, “ Alright, that’s enough of that. “ He hand comes to try and halt yours. But you use your leg to stop him.

Instead you ignored him, keeping your attention focused on guiding your hand to stroke him up and down. The water of the tub has begun to sway from the movement, “ I’m not done.” You whispered in his ear.  “ You said this weekend was about making me feel good.” 

Your tongue darts out to lick and bite at his ear,  “ You wanna know what would make me good? 

“ Yes.” His answer sounded strained against his voice. By now he’d ever so slightly begun to move his hips upward into your hand, beginning to get lost in the sensation of his touch.

“ What would make me good right now is for you to be a good boyfriend and cum all over my hand for me.” You say, mindful to increase the pace of your hand. “ Please can I have it, baby. Will you give it to me? Will you give your cum, baby? “ 

“ Oh fuck.” Austin’s head dives back against your breast and his eyes are tightly shut as his  body begins to become overwhelmed with pleasure. Your words doing something to him, of course he’d heard you be verbal during exchanges, but never like this. “ I’ll give you anything you want.” He groaned. 

“ That good, Aus? “ You used your free hand to come from its place on his chest, to grip at his chin and guide his head to loll to the side. It gives you access to attach your lips to his in what could only be described as a sloppy exchange of love. You swallowed his grunts and groans in your throat while he allowed your soft whimpers to enclose his lips. 

By now the water of the tub began to slosh with bits beginning to fly out of the tub and onto the floor from the impact of Austin’s hips coming to meet the pace of your hand.

He reluctantly forced his mouth away from yours, saliva collected on his cheeks. “ Fuck, just like that. Baby you’re gonna make me cum if you keep doing this.” 

“ Yeah? That’s what I want, baby. Give it to me, Aus. Show me how much you missed my touch, baby.” You moaned dipping your head to suck on skin you’d long ago identified on his neck to be his “ sweet spot.”

With that he couldn’t contain himself anymore and you watched as his face contorted into a beautiful display of pleasure and angst,  his eyelashes fluttered as he shot his thick ropes of cum in your hand. You keep stroking him through it until a hand shoots out to stop you. This time it succeeded as you ceased your movement, and watched his chest heave up and down.

Your hand rubs at his shoulder to help ground him and bring him back to you.

After a couple of minutes with a huff he speaks, “ Was this your plan all along? To get me in this position, baby. So you could use me this way, as your play thing?  “ He accuses. 

“ Guilty.” You whispered, thinking about how this all was in-fact a long game in getting him here. You knew had it been in the bedroom or anywhere else he would have undermined your advances and made your own pleasure the main focus as usual. But you figured that if you could essentially “ trap him “ into a smaller more controlled environment where you could take the reins a bit, you could finally have a moment to adore your boyfriend the way he always makes sure to adore you. 

“ What am I gonna do with you?” He groans and you smile, placing a kiss on his head. 

Eventually with no more funny business involved, you both take turns cleaning each other off before he gets out and wraps a towel around his waist. And then comes back for you, plucking your wet body out of the water. 

Routines are done and pajamas are thrown on quickly before he ushers you both to lay in the big king size bed. 

You relish the opportunity to sleep in his arms after so long. It seemed like it’d been a day and forever. When really it’d been about five and a half weeks. 

“ Quite the little show you put on there in the bathroom.” He whispered.

“ What can I say, I missed seeing the faces you make like that in person. All those facetime calls just don’t do those flushed cheeks or sweet strangled moans justice,baby. Needed to see it.” You shot back, and went to lightly play at the dip in his shoulder.

“ I see we’ve grown quite bold in my absence.” He muttered, trailing his eyes to your thigh that peaked out from the slightly raised shirt.

 “ So what about me? When do I get my own personal refresher of your moans and the way your body arches off the bed when I use my fingers to touch your spot? “ 

At his words, you could feel your heartbeat begin to race and the all too familiar aching and yearning you’d been feeling throughout your body return.

“ I don’t know. I haven’t felt like that in a while. I’m not as good as you with my hands, baby. “ You casually say.

“ Well. I don’t particularly plan on using my hands tonight. I’ve got a bit of a different approach since we’re so eager to try out new things. “ He said.

And then he said something that knocked the wind out of your chest.

“ Instead I want you to come and sit that pretty pussy on my face.” 

It would take you many moments and labored breaths of shock before you mustered up your bewildered response, “ You want me to what?! “ 

“ You heard me.” Austin laughed from underneath you. You were straddling his lap while he lay flat on the bed and you were pretty sure that maybe he wasn’t getting enough oxygen down there as it was.

“ Aus. You can’t be serious. I-I’m not a Polly Pocket sized girly, babe. I have a nice amount of meat on these here bones.” You countered, “ I’m not sure this is a good idea.”

“ What? You don’t think I can handle you? Is that it? “ His voice purred, fingers dancing up along the curve of your spine. 

“ Of course not! “ You clarified, “ It’s just that…that.” You huffed trying to gather the right words together.  “ I want you to be able to breathe , babe. HOW WILL YOU BREATHE?! “ 

You watched his face turn in amusement at your flustered state, “ Don’t you worry about that, babe. I’m a big boy. I’ll figure it out. And if not…. when they find me you tell them I died happy and stuffed in-between the sweetest place on earth.” He said, immediately you felt your cheeks flush, “ These thighs.”

“ AUS! “ You softly slapped at his chest, “ Be serious.” 

He laughed ,“ I am. They’ll find me with a permanent glistening smile.” 

You groaned trying to shimmy off of him but his hands at your sides stopped you. “ Uh huh. From when good ole’ Rick and Mortis set in.” 

“ I’m not asking again, darling. “ You yelped when he grabbed your thighs and moved you further up his chest, close to your neck, “ Get up here.” 

“ But Aus I- “ You cut yourself off with moan when you felt his hand come to fondle at your breast. 

“ What was that? I’m sorry I may not have caught that.”

“ I-w-well-” 

He had your virgin ass absolutely flustered. 

“ Take em’ off. I want em’ off of you.” He mumbled,scooting you further and tugging at your night shorts. 

Obliging, you somehow managed to rid yourself of your shorts and his shirt. At that moment it took all the courage not to fold right there. 

You leaned forward against the pretty dark wood headboard to grip at its edges in a fair attempt at stabilizing yourself in your squat. 

The plan had been to lower yourself down nice and slow, but leave it to your boyfriend to be an absolutely impatient brat to knock the wind out of you by slamming you down against his face. 

You went to make a remark of protest but soon found that the second his tongue touched you, you’d been left unable to form long coherent sentences. A simple moan of, “ Austin!” Was all that was mustered. 

He groans as he begins to eagerly lap and lick at your drenched pussy. The vibration alone makes you tighten your grip. 

Using his hands he bares down pressing you further into him as you cry out from this new intense feeling. He's calculated with how he uses his tongue to tease the entrance of your opening before gliding it back to suckle at your poor throbbing clit. 

The more and more sucks, the more your juices uncontrollably leak from you, until now the sounds of lewd slurping and your moans come together to echo off the walls. 

“  That feels so good.” You mewl, unable to control how you begin to grind your pussy against his face. 

He lifts up a little bit to mumble, “ Yeah? Am I making this pussy cry with my tongue? She talking to me, honey?” He sends a long lick up your slit making you jump. 

“ Yes! Your tongue is so good, baby. It feels so good.” You cried out. 

You could practically feel him smile into your pussy when he closed the gap, obviously satisfied with desensitizing you this way. 

From there he really started to lay into you, when he laid his tongue completely flat on your clit you couldn’t help the pleas that spilled from your mouth, “ Yes! Yes! Yes! Just like that! Aus, PLEASE.” You began riding his face with more urgency. 

A hand came to smack and grip at your ass to help you with your motion, by now your stomach had begun to build up into that all too familiar knot of delicious agony. 

“ Oh shit! Oh shit! Oh shit! “ You squealed, “ Aus I’m close! I gotta get up.” You tried scrambling off him and out of his grip, out of fear he truly wouldn’t be able to breathe from how hard you were about to flood his face. 

Little did you know that was all the motivation he needed to go harder, using his tongue and mouth to take a grip on your clit that outta to be illegal. He sent a series of smacks to your exposed ass to let you know that you had better not go anywhere. 

Tears sprang in your eyes, “ I-I. It’s too much! “ 

You white knuckled the headboard as your body began to heat up and spark with your impending orgasm. “ Aus I’m about to cum all over your fucking face!” 

“ That’s it, baby. Let go for me.” He moaned out against you. 

Gripping your ass harder he helped grind you faster against his tongue until he felt your body begin convulsing above him, “ I’m fucking cumming! Aus! Yes! Yes! Yes! “ You hissed, feeling the floodgates overtake you. 

After cleaning you up with a couple more licks and slurps, he catches your limp body and gently lowers you to lay next to him. 

Through hazy pleasure ridden eyes you look over to see that previously mentioned glistening smile set across his face as he lays triumphantly next to you!

You feel the bed dip as he disappears into the bathroom and returns with two damp towels: one for you and one for him. 

He goes to really clean you up before hoisting you in his arms and carrying you to the bathroom to pee. 

After everything is said and done, he brings a now sleepy you into his chest, arms creating a warm cage of comfort, “ So, will I be doing that again this weekend?” His hands rub your back. 

You nod and he smiles, “ That good? “ 

Voice cracking you whisper back, “ Could you not tell by the way I left Lake Erie on your face that it was fuckin’ amazing.” 

“ Just checking. “ He laughed, “ Next time we’ll try for the Mississippi, yeah?” 

_____

Next Day

Madison Square Garden 

New York Rangers vs Philadelphia Flyers Game 

“ I can’t believe I’m actually doing this. I’ve always wanted to go to one of these.” You squealed looking out at the crisp white ice while you were surrounded by thousands of other people.

Cup of water in hand and popcorn in lap, you’d dressed in thick wool lined jeans , a Flyers jersey, converse, and had your baseball cap to the back in spirit of your first time seeing a Flyers game in person. 

Austin laughed and took a sip of the wine he’d gotten. “ I’m glad we’re enjoying ourselves. I keep forgetting you told me you were a little hockey fan. Would have never guessed.”

You laugh, “ Yeah. When I was little my Aunt dated the guy who did the sound at the games for the Blue Jackets so we always got tickets. She’d go and take us up on the weekends and I can remember just always having the best time. Ever since I’ve become quite fond of hockey. The smell of the wet ice when they redo it, the chill of the arena, the way the glass rattles when the players zip by. I love it.” 

Austin noticed the way you hadn’t taken your eyes off the ice the entire time you were talking about this little passion of yours. A smile passed his face in satisfaction that he’d learned something new about you. For most of the rest of the time he got more pleasure from watching you watch the game then actually paying attention to what was going on himself. 

The way your nose scrunched when a shot was missed, your little squeals when your team regained the puck, and even how you held your own and  weren’t afraid to get back with surrounding audience members who may have said something to you out of the way.

This was hockey after all.

By the time halftime rolled around you were content at watching your favorite little segments. 

Kid of the game, celeb look alike, and your personal favorite: The Kiss Cam. 

The cliche track by Sixpence None The Richer echoed throughout the arena as you watched couples old and young peck each other and giggle for the camera.

It warmed your heart, but what happened next made it drop to your ass and roll onto the ice.

Because suddenly, your face made up in about a million pixels on the big kiss cam screen, there you and your grinning boyfriend were on display for the whole world.

People around you had begun to cheer and you could see Austin’s face was turning a shade of candy apple red. 

“ Aus.” You whispered, half covering our face.  The encouragement and cheering only grew louder and you felt Austin’s hand come to remove yours from your face. “ Hey. C’mon we can’t let everyone else have all the fun.” 

“ Just pretend it’s you and I. Only us. Okay?” He whispered, taking your face into his hands. 

You nodded and took a deep breath closing your eyes with a mixture of excitement and nerves pinging through you as your lips connected with his in a sweet little innocent kiss. 

The whoops and cheers intensified around you and when you pulled away you saw the wide smile Austin had his arm around your waist and you both waved to the camera one last time. 

After you were off Austin wrapped his arms around you, placing a kiss on your head, “ Always wanted to kiss a pretty girl on one of those things. Never thought I’d ever get the guts to do it.  Guess dreams come true.“ He laughed.  

You could still feel your heart pounding in your chest a bit thinking about how you’d replay that moment in your head for who knew how long to come, “ Yeah. They really do, they really do.” 

He placed a kiss on your hand and the both of you returned your attention back to the screen just as an older couple appeared. 

Eventually after some shouting, another small bag of popcorn, and twenty autographs from Austin to some fans later, the game was over, the Flyers beat the Rangers, and the two of you happily walked along to the car. 

“ Home for a nap. “ Austin suggested. 

“ Yes Please.” You yawned, feeling the excitement of the day beginning to catch up with you. 

______

Austin’s Brownstone - 8:23pm 

“ Well, Good Evening sleepy-head.” Austin greeted your groggy figure as you sat up with a pile of blankets sliding from you. 

“ Evening?! “ You yawned while looking around at the dimming sky outside the big bay window in the living room. “ My gosh, babe. How long did you let me sleep? What time is it? Don’t we have reservations? “  

You looked over to the loveseat where Austin had his feet propped up with a book in hand.

“ Woah. “ He held up a hand, “ Slow down. Take a breath.”

“ I let you sleep because you needed to rest, Babe. It’s about eight-twenty five right now and I called and canceled the reservations we had because truth be told I’m a little tired too. “ 

Your bottom lip stuck out and you went to protest but he held up a hand. 

“ So, instead I thought maybe you’d want to order in. Your choice. Thai, Italian, Mexican…”  He threw out the options. Nothing sounds good.

“ Do you know any good sandwich places? “ 

______

Forty five minutes and two wrapped hero sandwiches later…

“ Two-truths and one lie go.” You randomly said, reaching for one of his fries. 

“ Hmm. Alright. Well, I once shared the same production lot with Beyoncé and met her. “ He began, “ Two, I used to come home every single day in elementary school to eat lunch with my mother, and I once played a sad tree in my acting group’s play when I was younger..” 

You threw up your grease ridden hands, “ Automatically I'm gonna assume that the Beyonce thing is unfortunately untrue because I don’t think you would’ve held out on me like that. And I’m almost positive from that picture your sister showed that you were a sad bird in that play. So,I don’t know…maybe the lunch thing. I wouldn’t think an elementary school would let a kid walk home like that? Right? “ 

Austin smiled, “ Well my dear. Unfortunately this one you’d be wrong because all through elementary school I did in fact have a standing lunch appointment with my mother everyday.” He revealed.

“ Really?! And the school just let you go? “ 

He nodded, “ Yeah. We started doing it because of how shy I was. I couldn't really make friends at that age because of it, so sometimes it was hard being in school. Everyone knew everyone in town so the walk home and back was a breeze. We always ate P & J’s and watched cartoons or old westerns.” He recalled the fond memories. “ I know with work and other things at the time I’m sure her doing it wasn’t exactly ideal, but she still always made it work.” 

Your heart swelled for him as you reached out to rub his shoulder.

“ Awe, Austin, that sounds so sweet. She seemed amazing. “ 

“ Yeah, she was.” He sighed, “ She really was.” 

“ Wish I’d had a mom like that.” You sighed, “ I wish I would have had a mom period. “ 

As soon as the words left your mouth and you saw the look on Austin’s face, you instantly felt embarrassed. 

It wasn’t like Austin didn’t know about your situation, it just wasn’t something that you had in-depth discussed before. And you also really weren’t trying to make this seem about you either. It was just a little slip of word vomit.

You backtracked, “ I mean I do have a Mom. Just, it’s rather I just…have no idea where she is. Sorta…” 

Noticing you were about to say more but held yourself back, Austin encouraged you to continue, “ Hey. It’s alright. Tell me.” 

“ Okay well. From what I know, my Aunt said after I turned a year my mother wasn’t really around much. Started going out and hanging around with friends all hours of the night, and she just really didn’t seem that interested in Gracie and me anymore. Even disappeared for days at a time.” 

“ She left my Dad a note one night. On it she explained that she couldn’t imagine another day of being a mother. Specifically she said that it was draining something out of her that she was afraid she’d never get back. That we’d all be better off without her being there, herself included.” 

 “ I was only a year and some change and Gracie was almost five. And Dad did the best he could raising two girls by himself. He didn’t date much or anything really. Just was a devoted GM Plant worker and an even more devoted Dad.” 

“ A couple years later he found out that she’d remarried, moved to a part of Spain, and had more children. So, he made the decision to go to court and officially file for full custody of us. Which she didn’t contest, naturally.” You continued, “ I don’t think he ever really got over it, unfortunately.” 

“ He never talked about her at all.  And when he passed away when I was thirteen from congestive heart failure we went to live with our grandmother in Georgia. Gracie graduated and decided to move to Texas to pursue a career in public service. And after graduation I got a scholarship to Arizona State, so my grandmother moved and then decided to travel the world.” 

“ If you don’t mind me asking, has she ever tried to reach out? “ Austin questioned. 

You nodded, “ Only once. Not to me though.” You clarified.

“  When Gracie got married. Somehow she’d found Gracie’s address and sent a letter. Gracie read it but never responded. And she never told me what the letter said either. Her silent way of still protecting her little sister. I guess.” 

“ Would you have wanted to know what it said? “ 

“ I don't really know. Maybe? Maybe not? “  You answered. “ She wrote it just to Gracie. So, I'm sure there’s a reason for that.” 

“ Being honest….” You started feeling your lip begin to quiver and eyes water at the incoming thought. “ I always wondered if I was the reason she left? Like maybe I was hard to take care of or if carrying me did something negative to her. I-I *sniffle* It doesn’t sound like she wanted to leave when she had Gracie, so why after me? Why didn’t she stay? “ 

Your vision had full on fuzzied out now and your cheeks were slick with tears, turning his head to look at you all Austin could do was feel his heart ache. 

He tried to reach out  but you instinctively moved away trying to cover your face, “ Don’t. It’s fine.” Your voice cracked. 

He frowned, “ No it’s not, babe. You’re upset. My best girl is crying. Nothing is ever fine when my best girl is crying. It’s very far from fine actually.” He fussed moving toward you still. 

“ Hey.” He cooed, while reaching over to gently grab you and pull you onto his body, “ Hey. Shhh. It’s okay. Let it out.” He encouraged, rubbing your back and placing a kiss to your head as small sobs still escaped you. 

A hand went to your head to hold against him as he offered you all of his love and comfort.

After a while you’d began to settle and quiet at the warm feeling of being enveloped in his arms and calmed by his words. He hated that you were feeling this way. In situations like this it truly made Austin appreciate his mother, he couldn’t have imagined ever having any other maternal experience then what he had. He wished everyone could have had that. 

“ Hey, look at me.” He cupped your face and wiped at the tears while you sniffled, “ Anyone would be lucky to have you in their life, sweetheart.” 

“ I’m lucky to have you in my life.” He affirmed while making sure your eye contact never broke, tears forming in his.  “ You hear me? I love you.” 

You nodded, clinging to his shirt, “ I love you too, Austin.” 

He smiled, “ Of course. Snot and all.” He teased making you giggle and shriek away from him. 

He went to lean over and hand you the tissue box he’d snatched.

“ Now, let’s get into bed. How about a shower and a movie? Any movie you want.”

At this declaration you perked, “ Any movie? “ 

Now a bit skeptical, Austin still nodded, “ Any movie.” 

______

“ Okay, I changed my mind. Any movie but this one.” He groaned.

“ Austin.” You mirrored his groan. 

“ Fine.” He mumbled dragging you into his arms as the beginning of Lilo and Stitch played on the screen.

“ You really like this movie, huh? “ Austin chuckled into your headscarf. 

“ It’s my favorite! I was obsessed when I was little. I had a lilo and stitch lunch box, bed set, and all kinds of stuff.” You explained.’

“ And have you ever been to Hawaii? “

“ Nu uh. Haven’t gotten around to it. Maybe one day.” 

“ Uh huh.” Austin yawned.

Maybe one day real soon…

[sister-lucifer]

READ PART TWO HERE

Genre: Fluff, not explicitly romantic

Summary: It’s been raining all day, and you and Tim are stuck inside the cabin together. You can’t sleep because of the thunder, and decide to see if Tim can help you out. 

Content/Warnings: Gender neutral reader, brief mentions of alcohol, uh…if you can think of anything else let me know! This is pretty damn soft, but actually not explicitly romantic.

Like my writing? I take requests! NSFW or SFW for any fandoms in my bio (request rules + masterlist in pinned post)!

Also, please reblog! it’s free, takes two seconds, and really helps me out 

Feedback is encouraged and appreciated.

Not fully proofread! Let me know if you see any errors!

You don’t really notice the sound of the rain against the windows anymore. It’s been raining nonstop since, what, 7 AM this morning? Its not quite storming, at least not yet, but everything is soaked, and you can hardly even walk out onto the patio without your shoes filling with water. It’s dreary, sure, but not exactly unpleasant. It’s a good day to stay in, that’s all. 

You shift your sitting position a bit, wrapping one of the woven blankets from the back of the couch around your shoulders as you gaze out the window. You’re not really expecting to see anything, it’s just trees and trees for miles around, but you always seem to find yourself gazing out into the endless pines. You only turn away when you hear Tim sit down in the recliner, sighing lazily as he puts his feet up. This is a sight you’ve seen many times: A few strands of hair falling between his eyes, an old flannel half unbuttoned over a stained white tank, a beer can in one hand and a nearly finished cigarette in the other. It’s practically Tim’s natural state.

He takes one last drag from his cigarette before snuffing it out in the ash tray he keeps on the end table, chasing the smoke with a sip of his beer before that, too, is set aside. He glances out the window, whistling softly. 

“Ain’t nobody goin’ out in that weather,” He drawls, “Nobody with half a mind, anyhow.”

You nod in agreement, taking a little sip of your hot cocoa. It’s a wonderful way to keep warm in this homely old cabin.

You glance over at Tim, who is now absentmindedly flipping through TV channels. He’s probably looking for sports or Storage Wars or something, you think. Some old man show you’ll never find interest in.

As you look at him a bit longer, just spacing out a bit with your eyes on his face, your mind meanders back to before you two were this comfortable with each other. It feels weird to think about that now, though. You couldn’t imagine being in that place again.

Tim’s told you before that you reminded him of himself when he was a younger, when he was ‘new and green’ as he’d say. You were a wide eyed, scared kid, just like he was. You deserved to be living in a dorm somewhere, getting shitfaced at college parties and making choices you’ll regret the next morning but laugh at for years, not to be forced to cope with this reality. No one deserves it, really, to wake up in an unfamiliar place surrounded only by endless woods, no one and nothing around to help you and your body aching all over with injuries you don’t recall getting. 

He knows that feeling. 

He’s never felt worse. Neither have you. It’s hard to get worse than that, really. 

You were still a bit dazed when he first helped you back to his cabin, but something about the worn walls and cozy, lived-in feeling of the old rugs and antique furniture told you you were safe, at least for now. You were out the second your head hit the pillow. You slept for nearly two days straight. You really needed it. 

Since then you’ve been a permanent fixture in Tim’s life. You don’t really leave the cabin, and you’ve never left alone. Tim says it’s just until you can find a job and a place of your own, but he doesn’t seem to be in any rush to kick you out. You’re thankful for that, of course, but you can’t help but smile every time he insists that this is only a temporary situation, that if you don’t get off your ass he’ll quite literally throw you to the wolves, but he always smiles too. You’re definitely on the same page, and the headline says you’re not going anywhere.

The rainy day melts into a rainy afternoon, then an evening, then a quiet night. The rain has slowed down a bit, but now the thunder has rolled in, and every ten or fifteen seconds or so you can hear it clapping loudly overhead. The sound is a bit more…penetrating than usual, a bit more raucous, and far more bothersome. You’re not sure why. The only thing you are sure of is that your once comforting outdoor ambience is really ticking you off. 

You sit up with a yawn, glancing at the clock and groaning with annoyance when you see it’s already passed 2:00 AM. Damn, you’ve been lying here a while, and still no luck getting to sleep. 

The thunder crashes outside once more, making you roll your eyes. It’s mocking you, you think, poking and prodding in an attempt to get a reaction. You simply sit there for a few moments, debating turning your TV on or reading a book to tire yourself a bit more, but neither of those are particularly attractive options at the moment. You bring your knees up and rest your head on them, half lidded eyes lazily wandering around your dark room. It looks the same as usual, no surprise there, but when you look down the hallway you notice that Tim’s door is cracked open. 

Hm. Odd. He never leaves it open. Must’ve stumbled off to bed and failed to realize he didn’t close it all the way. 

It’s not a big deal at all, really, but the light of his TV leaking out through the cracked door paired with the noise of the thunder gives you an idea. 

You slowly slip out of bed, cringing a bit when your feet hit the cold wood. You’re as quiet as you can be, avoiding all the floorboards you know will squeak. There’s really no point, Tim sleeps like a rock most nights, especially if he’s been drinking, but you figure you’re better off safe than sorry.

You make your way to his door, pushing it open just a bit to peek inside. You wince when the door creaks unbearably loudly, but Tim doesn’t move a muscle. He’s sprawled out like a starfish on his bed, limbs in all directions and his single blanket only half covering his body. He looks foolish, but in a charming sort of way. He’s even snoring a bit.

You cautiously make your way to his bedside, watching him for any sign of consciousness. You don’t want to startle him. Even if he didn’t mean to, he could really hurt you if he thought you were a threat, though at the moment he’s not very intimidating. His sweatpants are ratty, there’s no hiding his dad bod in that old sports tee, and his face is illuminated by the cheesy sitcom he left on; not exactly the pinnacle of danger. 

You step up to his bed, debating what to do. You should wake him gently, it reduces the risk of injury, but how do you gently wake someone who could sleep through an aerial assault?

“…Pssst, Tim?” You whisper, but get no response. You repeat yourself, a bit louder this time.

“Tim, wake up.” 

He stirs a bit, but all you get is a groan and a minute twitch of his eye. Dammit. 

You sigh and roll your eyes with annoyance, reaching out to softly shake his shoulder.

“Tim, it’s me. Wake up.”

He lazily swats your hand away, groaning again and mumbling a reply without even opening his eyes. 

“Whaddya want, kid…?” He asks, practically chewing his words.

“I can’t sleep,” You respond simply, giving a little shrug. Tim is not amused at this answer. 

“And why does this have to involve me?” He huffs, glancing at you for a moment before his eyes close again. He turns onto his side towards you, yawning as he tries to pull his blanket back up. 

You don’t really have an answer to that one. Why did you feel the need to come in here and wake Tim up? It’s not like he controls the thunder. It’s not like he controls your inability to sleep…

…But maybe he can help. 

“I can’t sleep,” You explain, trying to figure out how to word your request without sounding stupid, “The thunder is too loud. I thought maybe I could…you know…” 

Tim’s eyes finally open, for real. He raises a brow at you, and for a moment you fear you’ve overstepped, but his expression shifts to tired once more as he turns onto his back again. 

“Kid,” He mutters, clearly annoyed but trying to be gentle, “If you’re old enough to share a beer with me, you are definitely too damn old to be running into my bed ‘cause you’re scared of a li’l thunder.”

“I’m not scared,” You quickly protest, “It’s just too loud for me to sleep. I didn’t know what else to do, I just thought…”

You trail off. You’re not really sure what you thought.

“…Never mind.” 

You turn to walk away, hoping he’ll be too tired to remember this in the morning. You’re in the doorway when his gruff voice stops you. 

“Wait, wait,” He drawls, sleepily waving you over without moving from where he’s lying, “Get back here, I ain’t chasin’ ya off…” 

You pause at that, then slowly walk back to his bed. He’s silent, and for a few moments unmoving, but then he scoots over a bit, patting the bed next to him. 

“C’mon.” 

You sigh in relief, happy to see Tim responding at least somewhat positively. You climb into bed next to him, though you’re careful not to get too close to him. You and Tim don’t really do physical contact beyond a high five for a job well done. 

That’s what makes it all the more surprising when he wraps an arm around your shoulders, pulling you into his side but making sure to be gentle, giving you ample opportunity to pull away if you need to. You don’t.

He doesn’t turn to look at you, keeping his eyes closed and his face towards the ceiling, his free hand idly resting over his stomach. 

“…You ain’t too scared, are ya?” He drawls. You’re confused for a moment, but then the thunder sounds again and you realize what he means. You hadn’t even noticed the thunder since you walked in. It was nice. 

“No, I’m fine, really,” You insist, “I’m not scared, it’s just hard to sleep with the noise. It’s more annoying than anything else.”

He gives a grunt of acknowledgment. 

“You get on to sleep, then. Ain’t no reason for you to be tired tomorrow.” 

You nod, moving a bit closer to him. He, in turn, wraps him arm a bit tighter around you. It feels…nice. Foreign, yes, but far from unpleasant. He smells like pine trees and faded Old Spice cologne. 

You yawn softly, pulling the blanket up over the two of you as you get comfortable. A comfortable silence settles over you both as the sound of the thunder mixed with the blurry noise of the TV. You’re the first to break it, a question falling from your lips before you can really think of stopping it. 

“…You were worried I was afraid?” 

Tim shrugs, scratching at his stubble as he answers. 

“I mean, I guess…I just wanted to make sure, ya know? Make sure you didn’t need me to do nothing to make you feel better…” 

That makes you smile.

“Didn’t think you’d care that much…” You murmur with a hint of a giggle. 

“Don’t be stupid,” Tim quickly snaps, “Course I care. I care about you. Ain’t no way for me not to. I’ve cared about you since the second I took you in. You’re not that young, I know, but back then you were just a kid to me. You’ve matured since then, yeah, but I’ll never forget the way you looked when I found you wandering the trail that day…” 

“Yeah, yeah, and you remember when I was three apples tall, I get it,” You tease with a playful laugh. Tim can’t help but chuckle, giving you a little squeeze. 

“Can it, ya little shit. You know what I’m sayin’. I knew what I was doin’ when I let you into my home, I wouldn’t have done that if I didn’t care.”

He’s got a point there. Most of the time Tim’s number one priority is self preservation. He rarely goes out of his way to do anything that doesn’t directly benefit him. He must’ve seen something in you absolutely worth the trouble. What exactly it is you’ll never know, but you’re certainly happy with where it’s gotten you. 

You turn to him a bit, giving him a tired smile. He turns to you as though he can sense your stare, cracking open one eye to return your smile before laying his head back again. 

“Alright, alright, ‘nuff yammerin’. Go to sleep,” He orders, reaching over to ruffle your hair before his hand rests back on his stomach. He never was good at being strict.

You stretch a bit before settling into your spot, getting as comfortable as you can so that you won’t have to shift around and risk bothering or waking up Tim later on. He hasn’t moved a muscle, his breathing already slowed and all of his muscles relaxed for once. It’s an odd sight, really. Usually he’s always holding some tension in his brow or jaw or shoulders, but he’s completely relaxed now, as are you. You finally feel like you could fall asleep.

“Night,” You mutter, your eyes fluttering shut. The last thing you hear before you fall asleep is Tim’s southern drawl ringing in your ears. 

“Sweet dreams, kid.”

reblog banners by cafekitsune

[katnissandpeetamellark]

Idk if people aren’t getting Why I’m hyped that the logo on the book cover is shaped like a lyre

But here is why I am SO thrilled about the TikTok commenters epiphany!

••••

I assume most people at least have come across the Lyre as a symbol of Greek & Roman mythology (thank you Greek/Roman phase we all had as a child lol!) BUT for this post let’s look at the lyre as a symbol of one god, Apollo.

Apollo is the god things such as: music and dance, truth and prophecy, poetry … sun and light. AND archery. (among other things… but these are the ones I want us to focus on)

Let’s connect these things to what we know from the previous books!!!!⭐️

- we can connect music & dance to the Covey & Lucy Gray (and music eventually to Katniss & the propos)

- truth to what really happened during the 10th hunger games. The hidden truth of how Snow cheated. The one we as readers know and citizens of Panem were forced to forget.

- prophecy to the line in TBOSAS about the Katniss (root) not being ready yet 👀 To Mockingjays and their connection to Katniss and the eventual symbol that haunts Snow to his grave. The connection between the 10th hunger games to the 74th and beyond.

- poetry again could be Lucy Gray and her songs that continue to persist in 12 despite Snow trying to destroy her and her memory. Ballads of course are poetry (or song) that tell a story. The Hanging Tree originally tells the story of the Arlo & Lil. The Ballad of Lucy Gray is about her failed romantic relationship and being sent to her grave in the games because she was betrayed. Poetry & Ballads are the way history “stays alive” in 12, even if the masses have forgotten.

- the sun and light are … of course the “sunrise” in the title. The beginning, the start. Apollo is the one who brings the light to the sky every day! Maybe this is Lucy Gray or maybe this is Haymitch. Personally I believe they are both Apollo here. Perhaps each child sent to their death in the games is a spark… a beginning to a brighter world where the games no longer happen? A reason to fight.

- another connection of Apollo to Haymitch is that Apollo is the patron of herds, flocks, crops. Haymitch is herding all these poor district 12 children after he wins the games. Unwillingly and unhappily but in a sick way he becomes a Shepard — and he also eventually has his geese. A peaceful Shepard at last.

NOW! Here’s another thing— Apollo has a twin!! Artemis!

Artemis is the goddess of the HUNT! Goddess of wilderness and child care (among other things)… she is also the goddess of ARCHERY!

Sound like anyone we know??

ANYWAYS! Feel free to add on any ideas, argue points (I just ask you please be respectful in reblogs & comments! I like to chat but I won’t engage with condescension or asshole-ry lol), or even speak on different aspects of the cover💜

[forever-once-gone]

New Drabble! On The First Day of Christmas, My True Love Gave to Me...

This is a drabble! To read the first part click here! And please I hope you all read this since you guys seem to love this pair.

Pairing: Yandere!Namjoon x Reader x Yandere!Jungkook

Genre: Yandere AU, angst

Word Count: 3.2k

Summary: Before you had gotten kidnapped by your boss and his fiancé, you had to first meet the Mr. Jeon that you heard so much about. So, how exactly did your first meeting with him go? Well, why not reminisce about the last time you were truly free? When you were not yet locked to your unfortunate future of being added into your boss’ relationship.

Content & Warnings: Gender neutral reader, yandere themes, angst, Joon and Kook are in an established relationship, CEO!Joonie, stay-at-home-boyfriend!Kook, assistant!reader, polyamory, reader’s sexuality is nondescript, talks of violence, Jungkook wants to hurt the reader a lot during this, general discomfort, making out, use of pet names, reader being none the wiser to what the two of them are talking about as they continue to type away on their keyboard lol

Author’s Note: Hi hi! It’s been a while. I’ve been swamped with school and just haven’t been able to write anything for you guys lately. But today, I logged into Tumblr and saw some very kind reblogs and asks and I just wanted to write something for you guys! I really appreciate the kind comments and It really does fuel me to write for you guys. So here is a drabble for your guys’ favourite couple! I hope you guys enjoy seeing how Jungkook and the reader’s first encounter went. It’s funny cause Jungkook is like fuming and they’re just like “this guy seems stressed :(” and then they get chosen (kinda) to be pursued by Jungkook and Namjoon lol. I apologize for not having posted part two last Christmas, but I was honestly just really stressed around that time. And then I wanted to have this small inside Easter egg (?) for something in part two but then I realized it was kinda hard to explain without having a previous explanation for it. So this drabble worked out! It was a little incentive to add that little tidbit into this and maybe you’ll have a little “oh!” moment when you read something later on when I post part two (whenever that will be lol, don’t ask me, idk. I’m aiming for this Christmas). Anyway, I hope you enjoy this. I need to stop writing this author’s note, it’s has gotten too long anyways lol. So yeah, enjoy and let me know what you think!

Jungkook was fuming as he tapped his foot impatiently on the floor of the elevator, seething for the elevator to spit him out on Namjoon’s floor. He was gonna figure out what was going on with his boyfriend one way or another.

His dearest Joonie had refused his daily cup of coffee… again. For the past few weeks, Namjoon, the love of his life, had been eating everything during breakfast that Jungkook woke up oh so graciously to make for him each morning. Joon finished everything except his fucking cup of coffee. Some days he’d be kind enough to take a sip or two before leaving the still very full mug standing in its place on the dining room table beside his empty dishes.

Seeing the mug full of the coffee that Namjoon used to always say Jungkook made better than anyone else left Jungkook feeling insecure. Insecure and just a little bit angry. Okay, maybe a bit more than a little bit, he’ll admit. Okay, fine, he was boiling with fury. He hated to imagine that Namjoon was drinking coffee made by someone else. Because he knew for a fact, if Namjoon wasn’t drinking his coffee, then he was getting it from somewhere else ‘cause Joonie was never able to get anything done without his morning coffee. And knowing Joonie’s disdain for store bought coffee, Jungkook knew it had to be someone making it for him, homemade. And if he was drinking someone else's, that must mean that he was falling out of love with him and falling in love with this awful, boyfriend-stealing, shameless person. And Jungkook was gonna stop at nothing until he found who this fucking person was and got even. He was gonna win Namjoon back one way or another.

The ding-ing of the elevator woke him from his murderous thoughts just in time to see the doors open to the empty space that lead to his boyfriend’s office. Or at least, the once-empty area, because now, unlike the last time he’d come here about a month ago, there was a table placed just before the office doors. And behind that table was a person, who upon hearing the elevators open perked up from their computer screen to smile at him. This person had a sweet smile, kind eyes, and the smoothest voice as they asked him what they could do for him.

He walked up to their table, arms crossed over his chest as he analysed the person sitting below him. The person still smiling up at him even throughout the awkward silence as Jungkook left their question unanswered. The person was dressed nicely and they had a kind aura around them. Their workspace was covered in flowers from the flower shop that Jungkook knew Namjoon frequented. Usually, his Joonie brought home flowers only for him, but here was this new person who was now swimming between countless bouquets covering every free inch of their work table.

When they asked him what he wanted for the second time, he finally graced the person with an answer. “I’m here to see Namjoon.”

The person nodded their head, before prodding for more info. “Alright, and who might you be?” the person asked, turning to scroll through their computer, searching to see if they had accidentally double-booked their boss’ time.

“I’m Jungkook,” he began, back straightening in pride when he saw the worker tense up in their seat. “Joon’s boyfriend,” he concluded, mentally doing a mic drop, hoping that those words etched themselves in the worker's skin, the one who was stealing his Namjoon from him. He hoped it hurt.

What he didn’t expect is for the worker to turn back to him after X-ing out of the calendar that they had been frantically scrolling through, before turning to him with a polite smile.

“I’m so sorry, Mr. Jeon,” the person began, “I think this is the first time we’re actually meeting in person. I’m Y/n L/n, Mr. Kim’s assistant. I just got shifted up to this floor about a month ago from my previous place a few floors down.” You reached your hand out to him for him to shake, just for him to completely ignore it, not even glancing in your hands direction.

“Yes. I’m sure he’s mentioned me before.” Jungkook was gonna make sure that you knew that Namjoon was his, no matter how nice you pretended to be.

“Yes, he has,” you replied pleasantly. “And of course, I’ve spoken with you before too, if you recall?”

When he thought about it, he had spoken with you before. The few times he’d call Namjoon’s assistant when his boyfriend wasn’t picking up. He would pace in this same area, back when it was still empty and call the number for Namjoon’s assistant to know when he’d be free again. The conversations would be semi-mannerly, at best, as he would ask where his boyfriend was before hanging up as soon as he got his answer. He never expected the assistant, that he never spoke more than a few clipped sentences to, being the one who was stealing his love away from him.

That they would have been moved up to be on the same floor as his boyfriend.

The two of them.

Alone.

And when he saw two cups of steaming coffee on your table corner, one half finished and one still untouched, he knew that you were the one making coffee for his man. He felt deep hatred rise in his chest, bubbling up his throat, ready to let out his rage on the home-breaker in front of him.

But he pushed his feelings down before giving you a pursed smile. “Right. You sound different in person. I didn’t even recognize you.” It was true, he wasn’t expecting your voice to be as sweet as it was, though he could tell it was strictly professional. Even when you were so obviously putting on a kind smile for the sake of your job, your voice was so saccharine. He could only imagine how much more saccharine—sinful—your voice must sound when you were using it for your more devious desires.

Jungkook wondered if you’d ever used that syrupy voice on his boyfriend. Walked into his man’s office with your probably sub-par coffee between your hands. You were attractive, that he will give to you, but he hoped that Namjoon wouldn't think the same way that he did. He hoped that any attempts that you’d made on him were met with bitter rejection.

But seeing you surrounded with all the flowers, making your soft features look even more attractive—though he hated to admit it—he knew that Namjoon must feel at least something for you. Why else would Namjoon have gotten you all these flowers? Flowers that Jungkook indignantly noticed were his favourites.

You were perfect and that’s what made his heart hurt more.

In another life, maybe Jungkook would have fallen for you himself, he thought sorely.

You laughed at his remark about your voice. “I guess no one really sounds the same over the phone though, right?” You asked him. “I mean, you sound pretty different yourself.”

Jungkook felt his eye twitch. Was that a dig at him? Were you implying that he was being rude? Were you saying he was anything less than the kindest, best person in the world? He restrained himself from reaching over your desk and pulling your hair out, telling you how Namjoon always told him that he was the best person in the world. He wanted to tell you that you’d never compare to him in Namjoon’s eyes.

Instead of doing any of that, he decided it was better to just ask for his boyfriend. He had a few choice words that he wanted to have with him.

“So will you please tell me if my boyfriend is available?” he asked you, steering the conversation back to the original topic of conversation.

Your eyes widened. “Oh! I’m so sorry, Mr. Jeon. In my surprise of meeting you for the first time, I forgot to tell you that he’s in a meeting right now. He should be done in…” You turned to check the clock on the wall. “...in just about ten minutes.”

You turned back to the man in front of you who stood there with a small pout that you were sure he didn’t realize was there and you observed the way his eyebrows scrunched slightly together. It was funny to see how his overly expressive face had changed so many times in the little amount of time that he’d come up to you. Clearly something was bothering this poor guy, so you tried to be as nice to him as you could. Though it only seemed to make him look even worse.

“You can wait for him in the sitting area over there or you could wait for Mr. Kim in his office.” You left it up to Mr. Jeon choose what he’d rather do, only for him to scoff slightly.

“I’ll wait for him in his office,” he answered curtly. He began to walk away and you turned back to your computer only for him to step back up to you. He pointed at the mug sitting beside yours. “Is this for Joonie?”

“Uh yeah.”

“I’ll take this to him.” He gave you another half smile and one last glance at your pretty face before finally entering Mr. Kim’s and taking the suffocating aura that was surrounding him with him. You sighed in relief. You hated having to deal with this job, but the paycheque wasn’t anything to scoff at, and so you settled back into your chair and hoped Mr. Kim would get here soon.

Namjoon found Jungkook sitting in his chair when he returned from his meeting on one of the lower floors of the building. His younger boyfriend sipping on a cup of coffee that he recognized was the one that you usually set out for him. He could see Jungkook’s eyebrows furrowed in disgust, as he continuously sipped loudly from his drink.

Namjoon could tell immediately that his beloved was in one of his moods. He knew that he had to get control of the situation, and quickly, especially if he didn’t want you to overhear whatever Kookie was upset about.

“Hi, love. What are you doing here?” Namjoon rounded the table to press a kiss against Jungkook’s temple as he continued to sip from his cup.

“They make some good coffee, huh? I see now why you’ve been rejecting my coffee now.” Jungkook got right to his point. His voice was cold and he refused to look at his boyfriend as he set down the now empty mug.

Namjoon sighed. “Don’t be like that. I was just being kind to them. I didn’t want to upset them by not accepting their coffee.” He pulled Jungkook up from the chair momentarily before sitting down in Jungkook’s place. He then smoothly pulled his boyfriend to sit down sideways on his lap. He rubbed his large hand up and down Jungkook’s back, trying to calm him down.

“Oh really?” Jungkook shoved Namjoon’s arm away from him. “‘Just being kind’? What about all the roses on their desk?! I saw the labels on them, they’re from Sirf Ek Phool! The same place you always get flowers for me!” Jungkook folded his arms against his chest, stopping himself from beating his fists against his boyfriend’s chest like he wanted to.

“Honey, that is just because they take such good care of me—”

Jungkook’s eyes darkened, his mouth dropping open in disbelief. “Take care of you? Excuse me? Taking better care of you than me? Your boyfriend?! In which way is this assistant taking care of my boyfriend, hmm? Do I need to beat their ass?!” He began to push himself off Namjoon’s lap, eyes locked at the door with a barbaric look in his eyes.

Namjoon swiped a hand over his face, before pulling his boyfriend back into his chest, closer than he was before, his arms locking over his waist. “Love, you know that I love you more than anything else in the world. No other person could ever take your place. They are just very kind, I promise I’m not doing anything that would harm our relationship. I promise you.”

He pressed a kiss against Jungkook’s cheek, before pressing another against his jaw. He pulled a content sigh from Jungkook, and Namjoon knew instantly that he’d deescalated the situation. At least enough for Kookie not to go and murder his assistant. At least not right now.

“Why should I trust you?” Kookie let out softly in between whimpers as Namjoon nipped at his neck.

“When have I ever lied to you?” Namjoon said against his Adam's apple.

“Many, many times,” Jungkook replied.

Namjoon let out a half laugh against Jungkook’s shoulder, letting his forehead rest against him. “I guess I should clarify. When have I ever lied to you in a way that was bad for you?”

“Never.” Jungkook pulled Namjoon’s face to face him. “You always know what’s best, but that doesn’t mean that it doesn’t hurt.”

“Don’t be that way. I’m not asking you to be best friends with them or anything like that. Just give them a chance to be your friend.”

Jungkook thought for a second, thinking back to you sitting at your desk and your friendly nature. You weren’t that bad, and you were rather pretty… Ugh, couldn’t Namjoon just be clear with what he meant? Did he expect… more from you than just an assistant?

Jungkook’s bottom lip was jutted out in sadness, calling out to Namjoon with its plump red appearance. Namjoon was again taken aback by his boyfriend’s beauty and just how amazing he was for him. After all, look at him. Just a second ago, Jungkook was ready to beat up his assistant and now he was clutching Namjoon’s suit jacket’s lapels with a vulnerable look on his face. He looked so worried, waiting for Namjoon’s next words and his next course of action. Fuck, Namjoon loved that man.

He pulled his boyfriend in for a kiss, letting the shorter man melt into his embrace. He could taste your signature coffee on Jungkook’s tongue which only made Namjoon push his tongue more eagerly in his mouth. The taste of your coffee and the love of his life together making his head spin in ecstasy. His brain painted a picture of what could come if he was able to make this whole thing work.

He knew what he wanted, and he knew he’d get it.

Don’t mistake him for being selfish, oh no. He wasn’t doing this just because he wanted you. It’s because he knew that in due time Jungkook will fall for you too. He knew he would. He wouldn’t have to push it, nor would he have to force it. You were perfect for the two of them, he’d figured that out in less than 8 months of you becoming his assistant after the last one quit. You were incredible and he knew that you were just Jungkook’s type. He knew Jungkook and he knew that in less than a month he’d be just as smitten with you as Namjoon was with you now. Actually, Namjoon knows that Jungkook would be even more in love with you than he was now.

And with Jungkook now in his arms, Jungkook’s hands gripping the sides of Namjoon’s neck possessively, his thumbs pushing into Namjoon’s jaw. The way that Jungkook had finished your whole cup of coffee leaving nothing for Namjoon to even get a taste of, and how Jungkook despite his furious expression had the slightest bit of a flush on his face when Namjoon had first walked in, he knew that Jungkook already was falling for you.

Namjoon pressed one final kiss to Jungkook’s lips before pulling away.

Jungkook had a blissed out expression on his face, a soft smile etched on his features as his eyes remained shut in happiness.

“Do you really hate them that much?” Namjoon asked Jungkook, watching him carefully.

Jungkook slowly opened his eyes, a blush slowly making its way up his neck. He turned to look to the side, revealing his bright red ears to Namjoon. Jungkook thought back to your sweet voice, your pretty face, your kind smile, and the coffee you had made that he couldn’t get enough of even as much as he had wanted to hate it. He turned to glance at the empty mug on the table that he wished would refill on its own.

He waited for a minute before: “No.”

“But no more ignoring my coffee, you still have to drink mine! And you have to say that mine's better than theirs” Jungkook added.

Namjoon smiled. Perfect, he knew this would be perfect. He knew just how perfectly you’d fit in with his little family. How you’d fit in Jungkook’s heart. He knew the both of you very well. He was proud.

Namjoon forced Jungkook to turn back to him before attacking him with kisses again.

You turned to see Mr. Jeon skipping out of Mr. Kim’s office. You expected him to go directly to the elevator because of his short attitude with you earlier, but he instead turned to stand in front of your table once again. Smiling down at you genuinely for the first time since he first walked into the room.

You waited for him to say something, but when he didn’t, you figured you should say something instead. “All done?” you asked.

Mr. Jeon just nodded his head, which only made the newly blossoming marks on his neck more visible to you. “I had a sip of the coffee you made Joonie, it was good.”

“Oh thank you,” you replied, a bit taken aback by his sudden change from his previous conduct from before Mr. Kim had shown up. Mr. Kim had given you a small nod in greeting before entering his office when you’d told him Mr. Jeon was waiting for him. Mr. Jeon must really love Mr. Kim for his personality to do such a 180 after seeing him for just half an hour.

Damn, is that what love does to a person?

“I would like to have a proper cup the next time I come visit Joonie.” Mr. Jeon looked down at you expectantly. He seemed to be looking for something deep within you and when you agreed to make him a cup the next time you saw him, he seemed to have found whatever he was looking for.

He smiled at you though a bit hesitant. He pulled a rose from one of the vases of your bouquets, twirling it between his fingers. He seemed to still be a bit stuck thinking of something, but then he was turning away from you. He pressed the button calling the elevator, before turning back at you. “It was nice meeting you, Y/n. I hope we’re able to get to know each other more in the future.”

“Yes, of course!”

He waved the flower at you in goodbye before stepping into the elevator, flashing you one final bunny smile.

What an odd man.

Does 3k still count as a drabble? I have no clue. Anyway, thanks for reading! 💕💕💕

[murkycran]

Staticmoth/Voxval Fic Rec List

Welcome to my Staticmoth/Voxval Fic Rec List! :D

I will keep updating this periodically as I read more fics, so feel free to check back every once and a while! I'll reblog it when I update it, plus make a note with the date at the top. Trust me, this is by no means a complete list; there's fics I still want to add to this that I just haven't gotten to yet. I just decided to go ahead and post it anyways, because if I kept waiting until I ran out of fics to rec I'd probably be working on this forever.

These are not in any particular order; I'm going by both my Bookmarks list on AO3 and my memory of fics I forgot to bookmark. I also tried to make notes on what fics were written before season 1 released, but I might have missed some, so keep that in mind.

Please let me know if any links don't work!

✨Before you proceed:✨ read the tags on these fics if you decide to read them. Many of them have heavy material - no surprise given the fandom, but still, felt like this needed said. On that note, there's also fics with explicit material and some fics are straight up PWP. Again, read at your own risk/heed the tags.

Fic Rec List Masterpost

Radiostatic Fic Rec List

Misc. Vox Fic Rec List

------

Freak-A-Zoid by Femalefonzie

Summary: A shortage of suppressants in Hell means that Vox is going to be enduring a heat for the first time in years. Who better than the Vees' resident pimp to help him through it? Afterall, the last thing they need is for someone to complicate the situation with "feelings" and Val was the best at keeping love and lust separate. Until now.

TLDR; Valentino plays himself.

Notes: SO FUCKING FUNNY. Cannot read this in public bc I laughed too much. Val and Vox are both idiots. Perhaps the most human depiction of them that I've seen, especially during sex. Neither of them are suave or coordinated, but by god are they trying.

system takeover by Subedarling

Summary: Velvette has never been the type to play hero. But when a mysterious new player enacts a dangerous plot to usurp the Vees' power, taking her two idiots hostage in the process, that's exactly where she finds herself. Now she has no choice but to go on an impromptu rescue mission, maintain the facade that everything is fine to the outside world, and prove why she's the backbone of the Vees—and she hasn't even had her morning coffee yet.

Vox and Val are going to owe her so hard after this.

Notes: Technically Velvette-centric but I'm including it anyway bc it does have Staticmoth; found family. She's so badass in this, I love it. The Staticmoth is very sweet. :3

even if i quit there's not a chance in hell i'd stop by Subedarling

Summary: Valentino stretches his arms over his head as he enters the kitchen, yawning. His robe is hanging loosely around him, and God, if Vox were to run his hand down his chest he could probably count all his ribs. He stops short when he sees the plates waiting for him on the counter. His eyes narrow. “The hell is this?”

“You know, most people would say thank you when their partner makes them breakfast,” Vox says dryly.

Notes: Very tender. A good kind of hurt. Deals with ED.

Parvulus by Heliosolar

Summary: Vox woke up to something... unusual. Terrifying, even. He calls Valentino, desperate for the help.

Valentino is, of course, irresponsible, and Vox is exhausted.

He just wanted to get through the day like normal, why did this have to happen?

Notes: Written before season 1. The art of Tiny Vox is not linked, but I've seen it before and it is SO CUTE. If anyone has a link, please share with me so I can link it here!

A Wager of Desire by Heliosolar

Summary: Valentino and Vox have a small dispute over something meaningless, so they make a bet.

Vox has to last an entire dinner while at Valentino's mercy.

What could go wrong?

Notes: Written before season 1 release. One of the first Staticmoth fics I read. :)

Venenum by Heliosolar

Summary: During an uneventful meeting, Vox makes the mistake of stealing a drink from Valentino.

Notes: Written before season 1 release.

Getting Railed (By Child Support) by Charnel_Goat, spappest

Summary: The female of several species can store sperm for many years prior to using it to fertilize her eggs. As it turns out, spider trains do this too.

Decades after their romantic fallout, Overlord Choo Choo Charles is knocking on Val's door to demand he take responsibility for the results. By way of kidnapping his boyfriend to lure him to his den.

Notes: One of the crackiest fics I've ever read. Vox is an idiot with a horrible sense of self-preservation and Val fucks a spider train without birth control. Just...read it, okay? I literally cannot think about this fic without giggling like an idiot every time.

Beautiful Monster by IceBlueButterfly

Summary: “You’re late,” is the first thing that comes out of Vox’s mouth.

That sharp smile somehow grows wider.

“I believe the term is ‘fashionably late’ baby,” a smooth voice with a light Spanish accent replies.

Which… okay if Vox is being honest, is kind of hot.

Screen heating up a little more, Vox shoots a bored look.

“Or just late,” he snips back. “Oh well,” he claps his hands. “Doesn’t matter, you ready to get down to business?”

“Oh baby,” a bright gleam in even brighter eyes, “I’m always ready to get down.”

Vox is already regretting this decision.

OR Moments in time throughout Vox and Val's relationship. Vox may have no idea what the moth demon will bring to his life, but neither does Val.

Notes: A very nice exploration of how Vox and Valentino's relationship evolves.

Only a Shadow by passthevoxcord

Summary: Vox shows up on the hotel’s doorstep with no memory of how he got there or who he is. They agree to house and heal him, and slowly but surely he finds joy in becoming better. Then Valentino shows up and is forced to choose between self-altering addiction and the closest he’s ever come to love.

Meanwhile, Velvette has a new potion brewing, one that will grant her more power than the Vees ever had. Only Vox and Val can stop her, but will goodness really overcome evil? Or will they be only a shadow of their former selves?

Notes: The Voxval is currently toxic and only just now being touched on in Chapter 9 of the fic; I say 'currently' because the author explains in the AN of the first chapter that both Vox and Val will go through some "self-discovery and healing". Seriously, just read it. It's very good!!

You Found Me by passthevoxcord

Summary: Long before Velvette came along, it was just them. Vox and Valentino. Valentino and Vox.

Notes: Includes some interesting headcanons for Vox and Val.

Virtual Reality by passthevoxcord

Summary: Vox gets tired of his cybernetic biology being a barrier to his sex life, so he starts a new project to fuck Valentino in VR. Val will try anything once, but he has something else in mind.

Notes: Surprisingly sweet. ^_^

Muted by passthevoxcord

Summary: Val helps a nonverbal Vox deal with sensory overload.

Notes: Sweet and tender. :)

Freaky Friday by passthevoxcord

Summary: Vox and Val wake up stuck in the other’s body, but it’s no big deal because they both know how easy the other has it. Right?

Notes: Written before season 1 release. Sweet take on the different challenges Vox and Val face in their daily lives.

Something Akin To Love Series by Awesome_Possum

Summary: Vox's taste in partners is delightfully self-destructive and that's an itch Valentino is more than happy to scratch.

It's not safe or sane, and whether or not it's technically consensual is heavily up to interpretation, but what they have is probably something akin to love.

A collection of StaticMoth fics set in generally the same continuity.

Valentino is awful and Vox is unfortunately really really into that because a control freak in the streets is a masochist in the sheets.

Notes: Has 2 parts, both very much worth reading. Very funny, lol. Vox is in a hell of his own making but enjoying it at the same time.

Update Prescription by innerfray

Summary: Vox tricks Valentino into getting his eyes checked. They're forced to confront the nature of their partnership.

Notes: One of my favorite Staticmoth oneshots. Felt like an interesting take on Val's blindness. Angst so good...

Like Moth to a Flame (Or to a Bright Blue Screen) by datweirdo

Summary: Valentino is a moth after all

Notes: Cute and funny!!! "You fucking murdered him" lmao

30 Decibels by Shortsighted_Owl

Summary: Somewhere, under the low humming of the monitors, the quiet gurgling of replacement coolant being piped into Vox body, a new noise - dry, yet somehow viscerally wet, and so very soft - made itself known, but only just.

And Valentino almost missed it. - After a fight with Alastor, Valentino watches vigil over Vox’s broken form.

(What if Vox still has organic vocal cords, and after a fight with Alastor, the synthesiser he uses to amplify his voice is destroyed. What if Valentino hears Vox’s real voice for the first time?)

Notes: Heed the tags, there is in fact body horror lol. Sweet but mildly horrific. <3

Priest, mailman, cruise captain or chef? by Destabilize

Summary: Inspired by Vox's outfits in Stayed Gone - Val and Vox try out some kinky stuff with a priest outfit, to mixed success.

Ah ha!” Val squealed with delight, wine glass drained and thrown on a sofa, “This!” Val was standing proudly by the wardrobe holding up a long red robe with a hat and some kind of sash. Vox scowled, “Is that a fucking priest outfit?”

“Si! Isn’t it fun- it’s in your colors too!”

“You wanna be a priest?”

“No baby! You be a priest and I can,” Val sidled up and leaned down, puffing some smoke in Vox’s face, snaking an arm around his waist, “lead you astray...”

Notes: Surprisingly cute and funny! Vox fails epically at roleplay and it is hilarious.

riding out the drop by spoondrifts

Summary: Like he’d said before, killing Alastor was Vox’s kink, not his. He had been prepared to sit back and enjoy the temporary chaos until Vox got over himself.

What he hadn’t accounted for was the possibility that Vox was exactly as obsessive, bitter, and desperate for Alastor’s acknowledgement now as he had been seven years ago. Distance hadn’t made the heart grow fonder: distance had made a highly detailed revenge scrapbook complete with a conspiracy corkboard done up in red string.

Or: Valentino gets fed up with Vox's fixation on the radio demon. They fuck about it.

Notes: Features (sex favorable) asexual!Vox! :D (I lowkey headcanon him as ace ever since the "better than sex" comment)

Featherstone by spoondrifts

Summary: “To me,” Vox told the baby, “it seems like bad parenting to leave your helpless kid for a whole month with two unstable psychopaths and their parole officer. But hey. Who am I to judge.”

No intelligent reply was forthcoming.

Or: not-so accidental baby acquisition, starring the three least responsible idiots this side of the Pentagram.

Notes: Big Vees as family vibes. Wish so desperately this was canon.

vark attack by tarltonnnnn

Summary: Valentino has to petsit Vark for a day. Chaos ensues.

Notes: Written before season 1 release. Vark is a big dumb (and very cute) baby.

Unplugged by pinkpunchy

Summary: Vox looks like he’s going to vomit. Valentino frowns.

“For the one who suggested this, you’re being a real pussy.”

“Fuck you! Just give me a sec.” Vox spits out, muttering darkly as he adjusts his shoulders on the pillows, trying to arrange his body for the moment he loses all function. Valentino, despite his impulsive nature, waits patiently. His manicured nails drag along the spot where cable and port connect, thumb smoothing up and down the flat surface surrounding it. Vox’s breath is coming faster now, not slower, something Valentino is tuned into as naturally as his own breathing.

“Hey.”

A large hand grasps a corner of Vox’s screen, tilting it up and putting an immediate stop to his fidgeting. Valentino smiles, red eyes narrowed to slits.

“Do you trust me?”

Notes: Sex as a...trust exercise? Lol I'm joking, but seriously. Sweet and hot at the same time.

Electric Desires: Lust, Power, and Unspoken Longings in Hell by Dani69696969

Summary: Vox is starting to get fed up with Angel Dust being the only thing Val talks about when Vox is right there, ripe for the taking. Inspired by Vox looking happy that Angel might have quit in Episode 2.

Notes: Very sweet. Plot with porn. :)

The Art of Pimping by MarenRose

Summary: Desperate to close a deal with one of the most lucrative investors in Pride, Vox does the unthinkable and pimps out Valentino for a one-time date. What could go wrong?

Notes: Vox's jealousy and possessiveness really brings out his stalker side in this lmao. Vox is a little pathetic and that makes his jealousy all the more funny to me. :D

Welcome to VoxTek Enterprises! by MarenRose

Summary: Subsequently, Valentino, of all people, has become the office’s saving grace.

(A series of VoxVal ficlets through the eyes of Vox’s assistant)

Notes: Pretty funny! Vox's assistants are really going through it. One of the tags is "Imagine being happy to see Valentino" lol.

(Fic rec list to be continued)

[yuyu1024]

Breaktime

Pairings: Wooyoung × y/n

Genre/tags: fuck buddies

Warning: 🔞cursing, sensual touching, making out, Pet name, semi public [lmk if i miss anything]

Words:

Disclaimer:

- this story is just made up

- english is not my first language, please be nice 😊

Note: repost. Likes and reblog are much appreciated 🫶🏻 this helps me a lot since i am reposting all my stories again 😊

Check pinned post for more

***

It's friday. Last day of the week to work. Finally you can rest after this day ends.

It has been so hectic for you this couple of weeks because of the project your company has assigned your department. But now that everything is done and just waiting to be passed through the board members then it goes to the people that will execute, you are free starting 5pm this afternoon.

"Someone looks tired..." a familiar voice speaks as he enters the file room where you at. "Aren't you going to take a break?"  His hands slides around your waist as he kisses the exposed skin of your nape. "You've put your hair up again... I like it..." he breathes into your skin.

"Wooyoung..." you whisper, "what are you doing here?"

"It's break time... its my time of the day..." he forwards his hips onto your back. The friction of his bulge to your behind is making you squirm inside.

"Can't it wait until the end of our shift? I'm a little..." you pause and suddenly moaned when his hands reaches inside your blouse, pushing your bra up so he can squeeze your boobs. "Busy.. " you breathe, shaking. He's playing your tip whilst his lips is lightly kissing your neck

"Are you?" He is still dry humping you from the back

"I am... I need to get this..." your mouth opens, throwing your head back. "Done..."

"I'll make it quick..." he whirls you around. "You know I can..." he smirks.

Your heart drops then when you heard someone enter the file room. You are hidden behind the huge shelf filled with boxes and files but still you're head is visible.

You turn around fixing your blouse and to peek who entered, "hello?" You ask as Wooyoung goes down to his knees. Not just to hide but to continue to itch his horny ass.

"Ah! Y/n you are here." It's Hongjoong. "Why aren't you out with the others? They are going to eat out somewhere."

"I had to dip. I need to finish something first before I could breathe again.. " you say, trying to smile

"I see... don't work too much. We are not rushing anymore as..."

You swear you are listening to Hongjoong explaining and giving you encouragement from the doorway where he's standing. BUT Wooyoung is making you crazy right now. He pulled your panties down so quick and begin to torture/pleasure you by f!ngering you. He likes to play you like this. He gets more excited when there are risk during our breaktime sessions.

One digit enters you and made you gasp. Luckily Hongjoong didn't noticed it. But then when Wooyoung decided to put another one. Now you lightly lost your balance. The way he moves his fingers in you is so fucking good! You could feel him moving and caressing your insides. Hitting the spot and making you more wet.

"T-thanks for that..." You say to Hongjoong. "I'll just finish this one and go for lunch then..."

"Okay..." he smiles and then his eyes looks at your expression. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah... I'm fine... just a little... off...you know.. girls have pain... when we have our periods..." you breathe every word out.

You are very careful with your breathing as Wooyoung thrusts his fingers in and out of you.

"Ah, yeah. I know that. My little sister says that too." He smiles and starts to walk back out. "Finish that quick okay? I will talk to you again later to know if you've eaten well."

"Okay!"

Finally! You two are alone again.

"Ah! Fuck!" You grasp onto the shelf for support as Wooyoung picks up the rythm.

"You're so sexy, darling." Wooyoung left kisses in between your thights before he let's you breathe again.

He stands up, leaving your skirt still up and whirls you back to face him. "That fucker likes you..." he groans before he crashes his lips to you. Forcing his tongue in and making sure you melt into his arms. "Little does he know... his crush... is having the best time... of her life with me..." he says in between kisses

"Shut up!" You hit him on the chest, rolling your eyes

"Why? Aren't you having fun?" He's wearing a smug on his face as he cages you with his whole body

"Are you just going to talk shit or are we going to fuck?" You put your arms around his neck "coz if you don't fuck me now... I'll call Hongjoong and ask him to play with me instead."

He snorts. "You are one naughty b!tch you know that."

"C'mon Wooyoung... time is ticking..." you tease him, kissing the corner of his lips, his nose and then his cheek.

He breaks an evil smile across his lips. "Turn around and bend over!"

You do as he says, thrilled.

"Make sure to hold on coz I will fuck you and make sure he hears it from outside."

[beesmygod]

today is webcomics day. i am bea and i make "A Ghost Story" - part 1: pre-gaming

webcomic day is a yearly celebration of the art form concocted by the screentones podcast team as a way for people to see how the sausage gets made. my webcomic "a ghost story" has been running for over 10 years, and yet i still don't think i can say i am good at making a webcomic. regardless, the comic is getting made because otherwise i become very, very sick in the head. today i would like to share with you the process of making a page of "A Ghost Story" from start to finish. either this demystifies the process or will make you think im so cool and strong for doing this 2x a week. instead of reblogging this one post until it gets very long, i will be posting individual updates that i will then compile and post on my personal website. block the tags now if you HATE comics and want them to EXPLODE.

if you have any questions, even things like "what the fuck are you even talking about" feel free to ask. i want to feel confident in what i make again and i think sometimes interrogation from an outside source is really

---

that said, let's get started. wait just kidding i want a cup of coffee first, hold on.

ok now im ready. i have a big glass of water. i have coffee. i have a headset for the parts of work that don't involve typing words. i can't type words and listen to some streamer babble in my ear at the same time, so it has to be instrumental music or nothing. i just took my meds so they should kick in after about 30 mins. i woke up late today, which is weird and annoying. but maybe i can work late instead.

first off, i need to know where i'm going beyond this one page. if i dont know where im going with something, then i usually create something that sucks that i have to deal with later. hold on my internet died, i have to reset the router. ok, anyway.

what's rattling around in my brain is that not only do i have to deal with maxine's current predicament, i am also dealing with multiple plot elements i need to wrap back around to from the previous chapter. luckily, im about to put maxine down for a nap, which means i can get back to those other elements:

i need to finish the exposition from the three ankou characters for this story arc establishing their motivations as the oppositional force in the story. the "villain" is not these three specifically, but their boss. they need to have a loose understanding of what's going on in order to communicate this to the audience. god this started turning into a huge ass paragraph so i'll just keep it short there.

we've jumped back to before jack's horrible day from the first chapter of this storyline so we have to make our way back toward that and then lapping it, which means wrapping up his various open threads like:

feeding victoria and learning something new about her

finding out alice is a very exceptional employee who is getting many awards

watching valdo call lily while interrupting her during something personal to ask her for help with maxine's situation.

jack meeting with valdo and lily the day after they first met so jack can just tell them straight up that lily has 4 sisters she doesnt know about.

help that girl with her poltergeist problem. remember that. i've had jokes for this rattling in my head for like 4 years. im going insane.

and also the fucking tilberi!!! that has a point its going somewhere!!! there's a larger menace here!!!

other things to set up the climax of this storyline. sexual tensions, hints at larger emotional problems not immediately evident to the reader

lots of moving parts. and i feel like im moving in slow motion to get to them. i can see them all weaving together in my head, its the process of putting that onto paper that's proving difficult.

ok that took an hour starting and stopping. -_- let me write the next part as i keep brainstorming on how to approach this page. taking a "rubber duck" approach to this might help. heres an image from the last page i worked on (i have a 5 page buffer rn so the site does not match the finished pages) to get us semi-situated.

also because images will help people understand what skill level we're working with here. i need to be able to communicate an idea to the audience; if the art also looks good on top of that, then that's just an added bonus. but the ability to communicate my ideas is sometimes hampered by my lack of artistic skill or comics language ineptitude. like those speech bubbles kind of fucking suck but at a certain point you have to just hit print on what you're working on in order to keep your already glacial pace.

webcomics is a tightrope act where you're also spinning 4 plates at once. the trick is to keep the audience from realizing how many actually fall or how wobbly they all are. the act sucks but technically its not a failure.

[lovebugs-and-snakecharmers]

LBSC Lukanette Month - September 2024

Welcome to LBSC Lukanette Month 2024! If you're in a hurry, skip on down to the prompt list below, but be sure to check out the rest of the post for information about where and how to post for maximum visibility. Just to be clear, even though we call it LBSC Lukanette month, ANYONE can participate. There's no membership card and you don't have to join the discord or follow the blog.

You will notice we have many more than 30 prompts here - because there's no such thing as too many prompts. This way you can pick and choose which ones speak to you. As with all of our events, the rules are quite laid back (although we do have some hard and fast rules at the bottom of the post regarding the type of content). You may fill as many or as few prompts as you like, as often as you like, in whatever order you like, in whatever format you like (sprint, minific, 30 chapter epic, whatever makes you happy). Our official event dates are September 1 through September 30, but if you post outside of those dates, we'll still reblog. If you're inspired to write something that you wouldn't otherwise have written, our goals are met, so don't fret about the rules - unless rules inspire you, in which case, take the first 30 or the last 30 prompts and write one prompt every day.

If you are having trouble finding a prompt that speaks to you, you can also check out the LBSC Smooch Roulette generator or take a look at our past sprint prompts.

Please make sure to tag @lovebugs-and-snakecharmers in the body of your post so that we can be sure to reblog your work and include it in our final summary post!

If you post to AO3 please tag LBSC Lukanette Month 2024 and add your work to our collection here.

Feel free to drop any questions in our ask box or join our discord group.

Blue

Pink

Blackout

Locked In

Getaway/Vacation/Road Trip

Out of Town

Street/Craft Fair

Laundry Snuggles

New Pet

A: says something stupid B: laughing "Shut up. I love you."

Broken chair

Big Changes/Little Changes

City Walks

Streetlamp

Music

Shipwrecked

Memory loss

Bonfire

Thief

Headphone

Escape

Dorm

Myth

Planetarium

Change

Voice

Opposite

Improvise

Complications

Fancy Dress

Silly Costumes

Stars

Scales

Compass

Rhythm

Lightning/Spark

Mischief

Notebook

Melody

Secrets/Surprises

"Do you trust me?"

"I can't believe our first date ended in the emergency room."

"Why do I feel like you enjoy getting yourself into danger?"

"Are you okay?" "That was really attractive."

"You're a terrible liar." "I don't know what you mean." "You're smiling."

"I missed my chance once. I won't miss it again."

Rooftop

Free fall

Fate

Concert

Bridge

Piercing

"It‘s not what it looks like!"

"I already take care of 18 little guys so what‘s one more?"

"Is that my hoodie?"

Ink

Fortune

Famous

Panda

"Love is a choice, and I've made mine."

"Look, I know I don't deserve a second chance. But I'm hoping you'll let me have one anyway."

Unexpected

Stage fright

Nail polish

First tattoo/piercing

Secrets

Promises

Learning to drive/ride a bike

Airport

Luggage

Regret

The Rest of the Rules:

NSFW responses are permitted but characters must be 18 or older and the fic should be tagged accordingly. This is a Lukanette blog and a Lukanette event, so while Lukanette does not need to be the main ship, it needs to at least be included or referenced and considered endgame (in other words, they don’t have to be together by the end of your work, but the intent is that they’re headed in that direction, and if they're not, it's a tragedy, not The Best Thing For Everybody). The decision about what qualifies for reblog rests solely with the LBSC moderators. If a piece hasn’t been reblogged within a couple of days, either the mods felt the piece didn’t meet the criteria or it was simply missed; you are welcome to reach out in the asks to inquire which.

[eetherealgoddess]

Hello to my favourite writer on tumblr 🫵🫵🫵

I'm so sorry for asking this and I hope you won't feel pressured by this because I'm not trying to pressure you. I really really love you and I respect your time for yourself because you also have a life outside tumblr. You're THE MOST KINDEST blog I ever encountered. Like seriously, the way you talk to your readers just screams kindness. I actually considered myself as your fan because you're so damn good at writing dark content. I want you to also know that you deserve more notes! (your fics are phenomenal and you're feeding it to us for free!?!?!? for free!?!?!?!?!?!? Someone give you a generosity award.)

I really hope this doesn't bother you but there was this poll you made where you made us choose what fic you're gonna post next after the amazing hybrid story you did. I think it was temptation and the other two. I'm just asking if you're still gonna write the other two specifically the last one 😭 I was one of those who chose the third one. What was that again? I think it was bonten brat taming mikey's step sister? Or adopted sister? I can't remember , pretty. I forgot😭 I hope who ever requested that sleeps well at night and I hope you get your pussy worshipped for all this amazing fics. 🙏🙏

Fun fact! You're one of the people I followed early when I just started tumblr!! And let me tell you how much HOW MUCH I ADMIRE YOU AND YOUR WORKS!! I love you!! I hope you have a nice day, night or evening!!

the timing of this message was impeccable bc let me tell you, i was definitely having a bad day and then i got on tumblr and read this

your requests never bother me, even if it’s something i might not write or get to fast, i still want the requests. i also love to interact with you guys

my pussy has yet to be worshipped but with every comment, reblog (the tags with what you guys thought of the fic), anon/request, or like… it definitely quivers and that’s perfect for me :)

although i don’t post them all, i do read and appreciate all of the sweet messages you guys send.

ꨄRebelꨄ << the fic in question

❦

[maximoffcarter]

One step forward - Part 2.

Pairings: Casey Novak x Alex Cabot

Summary: Second part to 'One step forward'. If Alex was good at something, it was keeping her word and her promises, doing the best she could to not disappoint. But what happens when she leaves once again and she leaves Casey behind? Will she keep the promise?

A/n: So...I have to admit that I am very nervous about this second part, not sure if it's what people expected but I felt like it was a good storyline. I must warn you...there is angst. Maybe a little more than I expected. And this is long. I just couldn't stop writing. But here is second and last part of this one shot. I have to thank those who have read the first part and loved it, it really made me feel so good about posting🥹 And those who have sent requests that I'll be working on them over the weekend. If you have any more requests, please feel free to send them on my asks or my inbox, and I'll try my best to deliver. Enjoy and leave your comments, reblogs, hearts, whatever you'd like, will be very much appreciated🫶🏻

A/n 2: Also to clear things out a bit, I changed the story line a bit? Since it was never clear what Casey did, I brought back Mary Clark, and then I completely ignored the show Conviction😂 You’ll understand when you get there😉

Part 1.

*not my gif*

Casey had been asleep when she heard Alex talking on the phone with Hammond. She heard the crack on her voice as she asked Hammond for a few more days, saying that she’d be careful and it’d be like she had never been here again, but judging by Alex’s silence, she knew that Hammond had denied her request. It broke Casey’s heart to know that Alex would have to go back to Witness Protection, also go back to that life that Alex said she hated so much, she felt bad to know Alex would be alone once again and she wouldn’t have any way to communicate to anyone who knew her. She had already heard stories of the way she found out about her mom, how she had to go out with people around her in case something happened, she had become paranoid. And the worst part was, that Casey wouldn’t know where she was going, she wouldn’t have a way to find out because Hammond would just take her somewhere new once again, and it wasn’t like Casey could just leave with her, she had a job to return to, she knew Alex wouldn’t let her drop it just because of her. But to imagine her life without her? Now that was impossible.

Yes, maybe it was silly, maybe it was too soon, but Casey had to bury these feelings for years. She had already admitted to Alex that she had also seen her every now and then in court, or how she heard Branch talking about her or even had seen her on TV about an SVU case. But truth to be told, Casey had known her since college days. Who didn’t know about Alexandra Cabot? Top of her class, the favorite of the school, of course she knew about her. She had seen her so many times at the coffee shop she used to work in but was always shy to say anything, so she’d always ask someone else to take care of Alex’s table. Her silly crush was too much for her to handle, she had so much to do that she couldn’t get distracted with it. And then Charlie happened. That whole ordeal of being with him, of trying to fix something that was not in her hands, and then shutting down to almost everyone because of what she went through.

The moment she heard again about Alex, that silly little crush reappeared the moment she saw Alex in court. She was supposed to be preparing for her own court, but she had been curious to see Alex working, and boy did she not disappointed. She was not sure if she was entranced in the way Alex moved around the courtroom or the way her voice sounded so serious and defying at the same time, but when it came to the victim, it was so comforting and delicate. She had been 5 min late that day, and she cursed Alexandra Cabot for it, though she knew it had been her fault. And the day she heard about Alex dying? Her heart had broken into a million pieces, she had mourned a person she barely even knew, and the fact that Branch thought it was a good idea to have Casey replacing her, made her feel even sadder and a bit upset, because no one could replace Alex.

Thinking back on how both of them had so many chances to get to know each other, but the two of them were shy to even say a hello, made Casey figure out that life could change in an instant and most of the times life was not fair, but it could also give you second chances if you really looked at the bright side of it all. So she laid there in her bed, staring at Alex moving around her room talking on the phone and wishing she had more time with her. Alex’s words replayed in her mind as she looked at her; I cannot just come back, Casey. I don’t want you to wait for me. Even with Connors behind bars, they had no idea if Alex was out of danger and they couldn’t risk it, but they also didn’t know how much longer this could last.

“You’re awake.”

Casey looked up at Alex and offered a small smile. “I heard you on the phone.”

Alex sighed softly as she went back to bed, moving close to face Casey. She placed her hand on Casey’s cheek and stroked it softly. “I’m sorry, I should’ve taken the call in the living room.”

“It’s okay.” Casey smiled. “So…you have to go on Thursday, don’t you?”

“Yes.” Alex nodded softly as she bit her lip.

“You really can’t tell me where you’re going?”

Alex shook her head. “I don’t even know myself.”

Casey sighed softly as she nodded. “It’s for your own safety.” She whispered softly as she looked at Alex, trying to hold back her tears.

“I’ll memorize your number and he won’t know that I’m calling you.”

“Alex.”

“No.” Alex snapped as she took a deep breath. “They can’t take more away from me. Not you. Not when I just got you.” She whispered softly as she rested her forehead against Casey’s.

“We cannot risk this. Hammond would kill me.” Casey huffed a chuckle.

“Over my dead body.” Alex grinned.

Casey scrunched her nose and shook her head. “Not a good joke, Cabot.”

Alex chuckled softly as she kissed her nose. “I know, I’m sorry.”

Casey sighed. “I just wish we had more time.”

“Me too.” Alex smiled. “Hopefully this ends soon.”

Casey nodded. “Hopefully.” She sighed softly. “Okay. We’ll have schedules so he doesn’t know you’re calling me. We need to be safe with all this.”

“We will.” Alex smiled. “I just want to at least be able to hear you once a day.”

Casey felt her eyes watering again, nodding softly. “Me too.”

Alex sighed as she leaned in and kissed her lips softly. “It’ll get better.” She whispered against her lips. “I’ll come back.”

“You better.” Casey smiled sadly, placing her hands on Alex’s waist to pull her closer to her, kissing her lips softly.

********************

Casey was biting on her pen as she tried to focus on the file she had in front of her, but her eyes kept going back to her clock, staring at it as if that was going to make time go faster. Alex was supposed to call her 30 min ago and she hadn’t heard anything from her since the day before. They had a night call since Casey had been busy all day between arraignments and trial and Alex knew that if Casey didn’t answer the first time, it was because she was busy in court or with the squad, so the next chance was at night, which it was both their favorite times to talk. But today, Casey had been in her office all day long, so of course time felt longer since she had been sitting there for hours, and Alex was nowhere to be found and she couldn’t risk calling her. She sighed as she dropped her pen for the third time, rubbing her face as she felt the stress taking over her.

 The moment the phone rang, her hand flew to grab it, almost spilling the, still full, coffee that she had just beside the phone, only to groan as she heard Elliot’s voice in the other line. She hadn’t noticed that Olivia was just walking into her office, snapping to Elliot that she couldn’t get a warrant unless they had a good reason for it, and she was not about to risk having trouble with Petrovsky just for a gut feeling and no valid reason. She hung up and her face went back to her hands, completely ignoring the fact that Olivia had walked into the office and now stood right in front of her.

“Tough day?”

Casey looked up at Olivia, a hint of fear in her eyes but relaxing as soon as she saw the woman. “You could say that.” She sighed. “Thought you’d be with Elliot.”

“Ah, no. Fin is with him, I’m here to try to convince you of getting the warrant.” Olivia grinned as she sat down.

Casey scoffed. “Guess you heard what I just told Elliot.” She grinned as she looked at her.

“Casey, are you okay?” Olivia said softly as she tilted her head.

Casey shrugged. “Why would you ask?”

“I’m not trying to be mean or anything but…you look a bit distracted today and more stressed than normal.”

“Just a lot of paperwork and reading to prepare for trial.”

Olivia hummed. “So, has nothing to do with something else.”

Casey shrugged as she shook her head. “Not really.”

“So, it has nothing to do with the fact that Alex hasn’t called?”

Casey felt her heart stopping for a moment as she stared at Olivia. She looked at her as if she had just discovered her biggest secret, which technically, it was sort of a big secret since the whole squad swore that Alex had left that same day when she won the case, and Casey never mentioned a thing about Alex staying in her apartment for 3 days, or anything about what happened between them. So Olivia suddenly mentioning her made her feel a bit terrified because somehow, she knew that either Branch, Cragen or Olivia would be the first ones to know if anything happened to Alex.

“Why would you ask that?” Casey’s voice lowered, almost cracking as she felt her throat going dry.

“I heard you the other day.” Olivia offered a small smile. “I didn’t mean to hear anything but…you left your door a bit open, and I happened to hear you saying Alex’s name. And then, 2 days ago, you excused yourself at the precinct and when I went to find you, you mentioned her again. Unless you’re holding out on me and met another Alex, I like to think that you’re referring to Alex Cabot.”

Casey sighed as she looked down at her hands that had now come together, fidgeting with her fingers. “Yes, it is Alex Cabot.”

Olivia nodded. “Care to tell me what’s going on?” Casey looked back at her with a hint of doubt. Olivia smiled. “C’mon, Case. I did hide for a whole year that Alex was actually alive.”

Casey huffed a chuckle and nodded. “Right.” She sighed softly. “Alex…we had our moments…when she came back to replace me. The day she left…she actually went back to my apartment. She stayed with me, for 3 days.”

Olivia raised her brows. “So, you two are-“

“Not that we had time to disclose what we were but…” Casey nodded. “Something happened between us. But she had to leave.”

Olivia nodded. “And you have no idea where she is.”

Casey shook her head. “She calls me, we talk, but she doesn’t exactly disclose where she is or anything about her new identity. We just…keep each other company.”

Olivia smiled softly. “I knew those looks you two gave each other back when she first came back were not nothing.”

Casey rolled her eyes playfully. “Yeah well, it took us a while.”

“Certainly.” Olivia chuckled, but then her smile faded a bit. “You don’t have any idea when this will be over, do you?”

Casey shook her head as she looked away, feeling her eyes watering. “No.”

Olivia moved to the edge of the chair and leaned onto the desk to grab Casey’s trembling hands. “I’m sure she’ll be back, Casey.”

Casey hadn’t even noticed she had started trembling until she felt Olivia’s hand on hers. She looked back at her, a tear rolling down her cheek. “What if she doesn’t?”

Olivia sighed. “I’m sure she’ll let you know.”

“I’m afraid that she’ll regret everything that she said to me and that at the end…I’ll be here waiting and then she never comes back.” Casey bit her lip as more tears rolled down her cheeks.

“If there’s one thing I admire from Alex, is that she keeps her word. And I’m sure as hell that whatever she said to you, she’ll keep it.”

Casey nodded softly as she smiled. “I sure hope so.”

********************

Casey laid on her bed and stared at the ceiling while her cellphone laid on her stomach. She didn’t know how long it had been since she’s been in this position, but one thing that she was sure of is that sleep was nowhere near to come. After finally giving up on work, she had decided to go to the batting cages for a while to distract her mind, it’s been a while since she had been there, so she knew it’d definitely keep her busy and it’d also make her feel at least a bit better. But then, coming back to her apartment made her feel down once again. She knew she couldn’t keep this going, it had been a full year already since Alex had left, since the daily calls started, but it was draining. There was a point where she got mad with herself because they had only spent 3 days together after confessing their feelings for each other, which if she really thought about it, they hadn’t actually talked about whatever was going on with them, they just made sure to show their love for each other without actually saying it.

But Casey knew…deep inside her, she knew. Since she saw Alex walking into her office, she knew that stupid little crush was back and stronger than ever. Those small moments they had together while preparing for trial, the stares, and small touches, it was impossible for Casey to not feel that way, she knew it was pretty obvious that she had heart eyes for Alex in every moment, which made it a bit harder to focus on her task but also knew that this case was important for everyone, so she had to put her best posture and keep going. And then, seeing Alex back had made her go back to those feelings; foolish girl thinking that she could get over it but then Alexandra Cabot dared to show up again and steal her heart one more time, and she wasn’t even mad about it. She knew it’d happen over and over again as long as Alex was present. Casey had no space for another person, and she didn’t want anyone else, she wanted Alex.

Her hand unconsciously went to her neck and grabbed onto the small diamond that rested against her neck. There were times when Casey wore nothing other than earrings and sometimes a simple necklace if she remembered to put it on, but the last night Alex had been there, she gave Casey the necklace that she was wearing. Casey had tried to tell her no, but Alex kept pushing her to keep it. Casey laughed softly at the memory, feeling tears rolling down her cheeks as she recalled that night.

“You know, I’ve worn that necklace more times than I can count.” Alex chuckled softly as she played with the small diamond, the necklace now on Casey’s neck. Her head resting against her hand as she looked down at Casey.

“Which is why you should keep it.” Casey smiled as she looked at Alex.

“It’s now yours.”

“You know, I’m pretty sure they’ll notice it’s not actually mine if you’ve used it so much. Plus, me wearing something so expensive? Please.” Casey grinned.

Alex rolled her eyes playfully as she grinned. “You’re so funny.”

“The best.” Casey chuckled.

Alex smiled softly as she looked at it and then looked at Casey. “It looks beautiful on you. And it’s my promise that I’ll come back.”

Casey felt her heart beating a bit faster at Alex’s words, smiling softly as her hand moved to lay on top of Alex’s, taking it away from the necklace and bringing it to her lips.

“Ms. Cabot…you’re too cheesy.” Casey smirked.

“You know what, I take it back.” Alex laughed along with Casey.

Casey bit her lip softly as she smiled. “I’ll hold you to that promise.”

Alex smiled and leaned down to kiss Casey’s lips.

Casey snapped out of her thoughts when she felt her cellphone vibrating in her stomach, rapidly grabbing it, and answering the call. “Hello?”

“Hello pretty girl.”

Casey smiled softly and sighed in relief. “Hi.”

Alex chuckled softly. “Did you have your phone in hand already? You answered pretty fast.”

“Well, I kinda have been waiting all day for a pretty blonde girl to call me, but never happened.”

Alex chuckled softly. “I’m sorry. I had some stuff to do.”

“Oh? Ms. Cabot had a busy day?”

“Believe it or not, I did. I went grocery shopping and if I happened to get the phone out, one of the guys would’ve told Hammond that I have a cellphone with me.”

Casey nodded. “Makes sense.”

“I’m sorry, I should’ve called earlier.”

“You know that I love when you call me at night.” Casey smiled softly. “Helps me sleep.”

Alex stayed quiet for a moment, a faint sigh could be heard. “Helps me sleep too. I somehow imagine you’re here.”

Casey grinned. “Cheesy.”

“Don’t even.” Alex laughed.

Casey sighed softly and stayed quiet for a moment. “Alex?”

“Yes?”

Casey bit her lip softly. “I miss you.”

“I miss you too, Case.” Alex cleared her throat. “But uh, hey tell about your day! I’m sure the squad got on your nerves once again.”

Casey chuckled. “You wouldn’t even imagine.”

********************

Casey slammed the door behind her and threw her bag to the floor, not caring where it landed or if it hit something. Tears rolled down her face as she tried to calm her breathing. This was not happening. This was definitely not supposed to happen. She fell to the floor as she sobbed uncontrollably, her whole body feeling heavy and her chest feeling like it was about to explode. How could she let this happen? What was she supposed to do now? She kept hearing her phone vibrating in her bag, but she was in no condition to answer it, she didn’t want to talk to anyone, no matter who it was. This stupid system only showed that even when people tried to do the right thing, it was still not enough, and you’d get punished for it. A punishment for doing the right thing, but the bad guys got away with it no matter what. And now, she was suspended for 3 years. 3 years. For a stupid fucking brady violation.

And the person that she believed would have her back, was actually the person who stabbed her. Lost perspective? She didn’t. She just figured out that if she had the power to not let the bad guy win, then she’d do anything to do exactly that. But she didn’t think it through. She didn’t think of the consequences that could happen. She’s known people that had done this before, and they still have their license. Hell, she was so lucky that she had only been suspended and she still got to keep her license. She still stood by her words when she said that she didn’t want this job if justice wasn’t served, but maybe she meant it a little too much that now she was in this situation.

Life gave you second chances? Fuck that. She was naive to believe that. She got everything wrong. Either life hated her so much or things were just not meant to be. Not only had she lost the chance to do what she loved but she also lost the person she loved. Almost a year and a half since she last heard from Alex. She had simply stopped calling, she never said anything. Did Casey do something wrong? She didn’t know, but Alex had vanished once again and this time, she had no way of contacting her. What was she supposed to do? Call Hammond to ask? He’d kill both Alex and Casey if he knew they had been talking. But what if it was Alex who got tired of just calls? Maybe she had made the decision that it was better to just leave it there and not say anything to Casey.

But why would she do that? Why would she just leave Casey like that? What happened to the promises? To every one of their conversations? Had they meant nothing to Alex? Had Casey been a simple distraction for Alex until she found something else to do? Until she found someone new? Maybe that was it. Maybe her biggest fear came true, and Alex had finally figured out that after all, that promise was useless, and she’d never come back. Maybe she met someone, maybe she fell in love and figured out that having a new life wasn’t as bad as it seemed. Maybe she was already out of Witness Protection, and she had decided not to tell anyone because she had someone new in her life. But Casey was now sure that Alex was out of her life. She was gone. And there was nothing Casey could do, other than cry and mourn Alex once again even if she was not entirely gone. Now that she needed her the most, she was gone. She wanted nothing more than to find her, but what was the point in doing that? She’d only waste her time once again and she’d only get her heart completely shattered. Casey was alone. Completely alone.

********************

“What were you thinking? Did you really think we wouldn’t find out?”

Alex scoffed. “You didn’t for a whole year.” She snapped as she looked back at Hammond.

“We don’t know if you’re completely safe, Alex. What if someone tracked down the calls and came to you?”

“She didn’t know anything. She didn’t know where I was, we just talked. I needed someone to talk, I didn’t just want to be locked in the house again without doing shit or talking to anyone.” Alex shrugged as she shook her head. “Connors is in jail. I am not that important anymore for someone to want to kill me.”

“You still needed to be safe!”

“At what cost?! To have a normal life?! I have no life here! I was robbed! I lost everything!” Alex cried out as she yelled. “Do I need to remind you that I couldn’t even go to my mother’s funeral?! Only Olivia and Elliot knew I was alive, my whole family thought I was dead. I left after trial, I couldn’t even say goodbye to the people I cared about. You expected me to just go back and come back and lose that again? I was not going to let you take her away from me.” She felt her blood boiling as she spoke while tears rolled down her cheeks.

Hammond shook his head. “I’m sorry, but we cannot risk it.”

Alex laughed darkly. “Do you think I won’t try to contact her?”

“You won’t. Because you perfectly know that if you try, you’re also putting her at risk.”

Alex furrowed her brows. “I’m not.”

“Alex…you were a target after you tried to convict someone. Novak convicted Connors and went on to win the case. We don’t know if he had any other contacts, don’t you think that they’d also want to go after her? They tried to kill Antonio for a second time before he went to testify. Why would they stop?”

Alex looked away as she sobbed. She knew he was right. And she knew the risk of the calls, but this never crossed her mind. She was right, one way or another, there could be a possibility that not only was she at risk, but Casey could also be at risk and if they knew she was connected to Alex, they could take revenge or do anything to get Alex or to hurt her. Nothing had happened in a whole year, but Alex knew better than to be a fool and believe that it wouldn’t happen again.

“You cannot contact her again, Alex.”

Alex stayed quiet for a moment, looking back at him. “I know.” She then whispered, her chest feeling heavy as she knew it was now over, and there was nothing else she could do.

********************

“Are you sure I can’t come with you?” Casey looked at Alex as she finished dressing up.

Alex turned to look at Casey and offered a small smile. “I’ll be fine. I need to return the car and Hammond will meet me there. I don’t want you to come back alone.”

Casey bit her lip softly. “You know I didn’t mean that.”

Alex sighed softly as she walked back to the bed, sitting right in front of Casey and grabbing her hand. “They’re waiting for you to go back. You have a life here, Case.”

“I can just drop everything. They’ll find someone else.”

“Case.” Alex placed her other hand on Casey’s cheek, noticing her teary eyes. “I can’t let you do that.”

Casey looked down at her lap and closed her eyes to avoid the tears. “I know.” She whispered softly.

Alex moved a little closer until her knee met Casey’s. “It’ll be over before we know it. Maybe I’m able to come back before time, we never know.”

Casey nodded softly as she looked back at Alex. “I just wish we had more time together.”

“I do too.” Alex smiled and leaned in, kissing her lips softly. “I wish I hadn’t been a coward and I had talked to you before.”

“We were both cowards.” Casey chuckled softly.

“We’ll recover that time. Someday.” Alex smiled sadly as she kissed Casey’s forehead.

“This is not fair.” Casey whispered softly.

“I know, it isn’t.” Alex sighed.

Casey looked up at Alex as tears rolled down her tears. “Please, come back to me.”

Alex stared into green eyes and smiled softly. “I will.” She leaned in again to kiss her lips. “I’ll come back.” She whispered against her lips and kissed her again.

Alex opened her eyes as the subway came to a stop, she grabbed her bag and stood up to get off. She looked around for a bit, seeing that even if it was a bit late, the place was crowded, she thought that maybe they were going back home, or some were returning from their jobs. She remembered the times she took the subway to go back to her apartment, that apartment that she now didn’t recognize. It was her first week back in New York, and even if she was afraid to walk around the streets of New York alone, she needed to familiarize herself with the city again, if she decided to stay here after all. At first she didn’t know where to go, she just walked and walked until she chose to grab the subway. She had stopped by the courtroom, curious to see the place she spent most of her days in, she had even hoped to see familiar faces but that’d be too much to ask for. She even thought about stopping by the precinct and to another specific place but…she didn’t think it’d be a good idea.

She walked into a small bar that was a few blocks away from her apartment, sitting by the bar and asking about the usual drink that she always had after a tough case. It felt so familiar, yet so different. She hummed as the liquid hit her throat, missing the taste of it since all she ever had back ‘home’ was either beer or tequila that she bought, she barely went to bars, she barely went out as it was. She finished her drink and asked for another, smiling at the bartender. As she was about to get her wallet out to open a tap, she looked at her right side and saw a figure sitting at the very end of the bar, her heart dropping for a moment as she recognized it. She recognized her. Just in time the bartender placed the drink in front of her, she looked at him and asked if she could cover the drinks of the person at the end of the bar. She gave him her card and smiled before she got up and grabbed her drink. She could finish her drink and run out of the bar, and never look back again, but she couldn’t do that again, she could run away when she was just back. When this was her chance.

Was this even a good idea? What if she really didn’t want to see her or talk to her? Alex was 100% sure that Casey hated her at this point. She never called again, not even a message, but she had her reasons and she hoped that Casey would want to listen to her. She stood there by her chair, drinking her drink, and smiling softly as she studied Casey’s face. She had matured so much, her hair was back to its natural color, but she still looked as beautiful as ever. But there was also something that had changed; she looked…sad, exhausted, that light in her eyes that she loved was now gone. Was this her fault? There could be other reasons for sure, but Alex could be a reason behind this, and she hated herself so much for it. She noticed the bartender taking the drink to Casey and explaining that her tab was now covered. Casey looked up to try to find the person and that was Alex’s cue to walk to Casey; it was now or never. Casey’s eyes finally fell on Alex, she noticed the surprise and confusion in her face, maybe a hint of anger. Alex offered a small smile as she sat beside Casey, placing her drink beside Casey’s.

“Thought you could use a drink.” Alex smiled.

Casey stayed serious and quiet for a moment, confusion washing over her face as she looked at Alex, her eyes studying Alex. “Is it really you?” She whispered almost to herself.

Alex’s heart broke at her words, nodding softly. “It is me. I’m back.”

Casey took a deep breath and looked around the bar, almost as if she was looking for a camera or something as if this was a whole joke. She couldn’t get any words out when her eyes went back to Alex’s, she was speechless, her whole body trembling. She was confused, that’s all she could figure out. She felt anger, happiness, sadness, everything at once, but the only way she could describe it at the moment was that she was completely confused. Alex’s heart broke a little at the sight of Casey, maybe this wasn’t the right way to do it, she could’ve called first and not just show up like this, that in her defense, she didn’t know she was going to find Casey in this bar, though she knew Casey’s place wasn’t too far away from here. She saw how Casey grabbed the drink and finished it all, groaning a bit as she placed the glass back in its place. Alex sighed softly as she dared to place her hand on Casey’s hand.

“Casey.”

“No.”

Alex furrowed her brows. “I know-“

“I cannot do this right now.” Casey shook her head as she cried out, staring at the empty glass.

“I can explain. Please, I-“

“Not here.” Casey looked back at Alex and bit her lip, getting up from the chair and taking her hand away from Alex’s. “I’ll meet you outside, I just…need a moment.” She grabbed her purse and left some dollars on the countertop, exiting the bar right after.

Alex sighed heavily as she looked at the bartender and asked to close the tab. She finished her drink and thanked the bartender, grabbing her card and putting it back on her purse, offering a small smile before she exited the bar too. She stood by the door for a moment as she saw Casey facing the street. She felt bad for doing this to her, she knew this had been a bad idea, but she couldn’t just leave the bar without saying anything. She slowly walked to her and extended her hand but put it back down as she stared at Casey. It had been clear that she hadn’t been comfortable with Alex touching her hand back in the bar so she would keep her distance.

 “Casey?” Alex whispered softly.

Casey looked back at Alex, her eyes red and puffy. She sniffled and nodded softly. “Let’s uh…let’s go to my apartment.”

The whole way to Casey apartment, Alex tried to focus her eyes on Casey, trying not to be the paranoid person that she had become in the last few years, she knew they were safe, that she was safe, but she still couldn’t help but feel a bit scared as they walked. Alex had planned to go for a drink or two and then call a cab to take her home, but if Casey wanted to walk, they’d walk. As for Casey, her mind kept spinning around, not sure what she was really doing. She had never really planned what she’d do if Alex did come back at some point. Without Alex noticing, she kept looking down at her hands, trying to find a sign of a ring or something, but nothing was there, which made part of feel relieved by this, but she was also slapping herself in her mind for even looking for something. She was supposed to be mad, she wasn’t supposed to do this. She should’ve left her back at the bar, why would she even accept to talk to her? But god, she so wished she could just wrap her arms around Alex and hug her, she needed her hugs more than anything.

Once they got to Casey’s apartment, Casey closed the door behind her and sighed softly as she rested her head against the door, mostly preparing herself for whatever was coming. She turned to look at Alex, who only stood a few feet away from her, waiting for Casey to say anything or move, whatever she was going to do, Alex would literally follow. Casey couldn’t help but look up at her up and down; it’s like she had not changed at all, she looked just the same. Her hair had grown a bit more, she noticed she had made some layers which made her look so beautiful. Her glasses had changed, even her clothing had, which was so weird to see her in a pair of jeans and a leather jacket…but she looked beautiful. It made Casey feel a bit ashamed of her appearance, she knew that lately, she has not looked her best and it made her overthink a bit what Alex must be thinking about her, but she pushed back those thoughts. She looked away as she bit her lip, looking at her kitchen.

“Um…would you like to drink something? I have…some wine. Orange juice. Water.”

Alex cleared her throat as she shrugged. “Wine would be fine.”

Casey nodded softly as she went to the kitchen, putting her purse on her couch before she passed Alex, and opened her cabinets to find the wine, suddenly forgetting where she had placed it. Alex placed her purse on the couch just like Casey and followed after but stopped at the kitchen island, not being able to tear her eyes away from Casey. The place felt so familiar, she couldn’t help but smile as she looked around. Not much had changed, one or two things here and there, but still felt like Casey. She looked at Casey again when she placed a glass in front of her, pouring some wine for her. Casey poured herself some and then placed the bottle right beside it. They stared at each other for a moment, neither of them saying a word. Alex had so much to say but she was not sure if it was right for her to start talking or just let Casey do the talking for now, her anxiety slowly increasing as she could tell Casey was now more upset than confused. Or maybe sad? Alex couldn’t quiet tell.

“Wanna sit on the couch? So…we’re a bit more comfortable.”

Alex nodded. “Sure.”

They both headed to the couch with their glasses in hand. As they sat down, Alex took a small sip for courage and then placed the glass on the small table in front of her, Casey mimicking her actions. They once again stared at each other, Alex taking the chance to study Casey’s face again, smiling a bit as her eyes dropped to her neck, noticing the necklace she had given her still on her.

“You still have it.” Alex whispered as her eyes returned to Casey’s.

Casey looked down at the necklace and smiled softly. “I never really take it off.”

“Did they ever ask you about it?” Alex grinned a little.

Casey looked up at Alex and smiled a bit. “Munch and Huang noticed first. Olivia did too at some point. The others were oblivious.”

Alex chuckled slightly. “I figured those two would notice first.”

“You want it back?”

Alex furrowed her brows as she stared at Casey. “What?”

Casey shrugged. “I mean…you’re back. I thought maybe-“

“I told you it’s yours. It was…my promise that I’d come back.”

Casey nodded. “And you did.”

Alex smiled a little. “I did.” Casey bit her lip as she looked down at her hands, Alex couldn’t help but stare at her lips. “I always wanted to run my thumb over your lips so you wouldn’t bite it.” Alex paused as Casey looked back up. “And then kiss you.”

Casey felt her heartbeat raising a bit at the confession, her cheeks going slightly red. “It’s a thing I do. I don’t do it consciously.”

“I know that.” Alex smiled.

Casey looked back down at her hands and furrowed her brows. “Why…why did you stop calling?” She whispered softly.

Alex sighed as she looked away, trying to remember what she had practiced before. “Hammond found out.”

Casey shot her head up. “What?”

Alex nodded. “One of his guys…I didn’t notice he had walked into the house, and I was back in the patio, talking to you. He told Hammond that same day and he came to my house the next.” She shrugged. “We had a bit of a discussion.”

“Did he take away the phone?”

Alex shook her head as she looked back at Casey. “No.”

“Then why didn’t you call? Did you really just listened to him and decided it would be a good idea to not call me and not even let me know that you wouldn’t do it anymore?” Casey’s voice broke slightly as she felt her eyes getting teary. “You just stopped.”

“I couldn’t…I-“ Alex bit her lip softly as she looked down at her hands. “I didn’t want to listen to him. I was not going to. I was just going to agree and move on, but he knew. And he talked to me and…I had to listen.”

“Why?”

“Because I couldn’t put you at risk, Casey.” Alex looked back up at her, a hint of fear in her eyes. “He told me that anyone could trace the calls if there was anyone out there. He didn’t want to tell me to not scare me, but they found someone that was related to Connors. You convicted him, what if he came after you?” She felt her lip trembling as she spoke and her eyes getting teary as she stared at Casey. “I couldn’t let them get to you, Casey. And he didn’t even tell me after days. But he told me I could put you at risk. I didn’t even care about me anymore, but I couldn’t let you get hurt. Not again.” She took a shaky breath. “I could still see you…with bruises. You barely being able to walk. I couldn’t let that happen to you again and me…not being here. Not being able to know if you were okay.”

Casey didn’t notice her tears already rolling down her cheeks, wanting to look away from Alex so badly but not being able to. “Alex.”

“Cragen told me you were okay. You were fully back to work and…you were safe.” Alex shrugged. “I just needed to make sure you were okay.” She whispered softly as she wiped away her tears.

“Alex…I could’ve taken care of myself. I could’ve told Olivia and Elliot, so they could’ve been alert if something happened. Olivia already knew that we were talking.”

Alex furrowed her brows. “What?”

Casey sighed. “She…she heard me once or twice and she didn’t say anything until one day she came to my office and asked me. I knew better than to lie to her, so I admitted it, but she never told anyone.” She shrugged. “I guess Cragen and Liv were good at keeping secrets, huh?” She smiled a bit.

Alex huffed a chuckle and nodded. “I guess so.”

Casey sobbed quietly as she looked down at her hands. “I needed you.” She whispered softly.

Alex tilted her head as she swallowed. “I know, honey. But I-“

“I’m suspended.”

Alex furrowed her brows. “What?”

Casey let out a shaky breath as she looked back at Alex. “Brady violation. I-“ she shook her head. “I tried to do the right thing and…everything ended differently than I expected. Judge was Petrovsky…defense was Donna…” she closed her eyes for a moment as she recalled the moment. “Donelly…said I lost perspective.”

“When did that happen?”

“Over 6 months ago.” Casey shrugged. “I uh…I’m helping Mary Clark with some cases. By that I mean…research, clerical activities. Just simple jobs but you know…I’m not running out of money. Guess she felt too bad for me that I got suspended and I’m back under her wing.” She chuckled sadly.

Alex moved closer to Casey and grabbed her hand, bringing it to her lips. “Casey…I am so sorry. I should’ve been there for you. I was an idiot for vanishing like that.”

“I get it.” Casey looked up at her and smiled sadly. “I now get it.”

“That’s still not an excuse.”

Casey sighed as she placed her hand on Alex’s cheek, wiping away her tears. “I forgive you, Alex.”

Alex let out a shaky breath that she didn’t even know she was holding. “You don’t have to. I mean-“

“But I do.” Casey bit her lip softly as she shook her head. “I cannot lose you again, Alex.” She took a deep breath as her tears rolled down her cheeks. “I was upset. I…I didn’t understand what had happened, I thought I had done something wrong or that…that you just figured out you couldn’t do this anymore.”

Alex shook her head. “No. I wanted to call you every single day. I wanted to come and find you, but they didn’t let me.”

“Now you’re here.” Casey whispered as she smiled.

Alex nodded, turning her head slightly to kiss Casey’s hand on her cheek, her hand going on top of it. “I am. And I’m not going anywhere.”

Casey smiled. “I’d actually kill you if you dare go somewhere.” She chuckled softly.

Alex huffed a chuckle as she smiled. “I can’t. I won’t.” She tilted her head. “I want to keep my promise…and I want us to try this.”

Casey’s face softened. “Try this?”

“Us.” Alex smiled. “I want us to…to get to know each other again. I want us to go on dates. To…you know try this whole relationship thi-“

Casey interrupted Alex as she placed her other hand on Alex’s cheek and pulled her in for a kiss. Alex gasped as she felt Casey’s lips against her but placed her hands on Casey’s neck to keep her in place, kissing her back softly. Alex felt more tears rolling down her cheeks, she felt so overwhelmed about everything that was going on, but this definitely calmed her anxiety down, knowing that Casey really meant it and she really forgave her, and that’s all Alex had been hoping for. Hell, she would’ve accepted a friendship if anything, she just needed Casey in her life -well maybe she wouldn’t have entirely accepted the friendship because of how she felt about Casey, but she would respect the boundaries-. Both women couldn’t help but smile against each other’s lips, breaking the kiss for a slight moment before Alex brought Casey’s lips back to hers, not wanting the kiss to end. They finally separated as they tried catching their breath. Alex smiled softly as she rested her forehead against Casey’s.

“I love you, Casey.”

Casey pulled away enough to look at Alex, a surprised look on her face. “What?”

Alex’s eyes widened as she stared at Casey, swallowing hard as her hands left Casey’s neck. “I- uh. I mean- fuck. Casey. I-“

Casey chuckled softly. “You know that you’re cute even when you’re a bundle of anxiety?” She raised her brow as she grinned playfully.

“What do you expect me to do? I…I told you I loved you and you’re making fun of me and-”

“And I love you too.” Casey smiled as she ran her hand through Alex’s hair.

Alex sighed in relief as she smiled. “You do?”

Casey nodded. “I do.” She smiled. “And, by the way, I do agree on going on dates, maybe updating each other a bit more on each other’s lives but…why waste more time, Alex?”

Alex smiled. “I mean…I did drop the L bomb after basically trying to say that we could take things slow, so. I broke my own rule.” She shrugged as Casey laughed.

“You’re cute.” Casey smiled as she pecked her lips softly. “I missed you so much.”

“I missed you too.” Alex smiled as she placed her hands on Casey’s back but then pulled them back quickly.

Casey rolled her eyes playfully. “Alex…it’s been over 3 years. My ribs are perfectly fine. You don’t have to be careful anymore.”

“I’d still be careful. I still don’t wanna hurt you.”

“I know you wouldn’t hurt me.” Casey smirked softly as she placed her hand on Alex’s chest and pushed her slightly, so her back was resting against the couch. She then moved to straddle her waist, wrapping her arms around Alex’s neck. “And what if I don’t want you to be careful?”

Alex gulped as she looked up at Casey. “Well, that changes things.” She grinned as she placed her hands on Casey’s waist.

“It does.” Casey smiled before she leaned down for another kiss, but this time with more passion.

********************

“Anyone know who’s out temporary ADA?” Fin asked as he looked at Elliot.

“How about one back from the dead?”

They both turned to look at Casey who was already smiling and taking her coat off. “Casey Novak. You’re back.”

Casey shrugged. “Alive and fairly well.” She sighed as she smiled. “Alex and I are gonna share some cases, but…I am.”

Olivia smiled softly as she walked to Casey and hugged her tightly. “I’m so glad you’re back.”

Casey smiled softly as she pulled away from the hug and looked at Olivia. “I’m happy I am.”

“Well, we have our two favorite back.” Much said as he patted her shoulder.

Casey nodded. “Thank you for the warm welcome. But, I think we have a case to work on?”

“Just got here and you already want to start working? Eager much, Novak?”

Casey smirked as she turned to look at Alex. “I don’t think you have ever minded that, Cabot.”

Alex grinned as she kissed her cheek softly. “That’s a secret.” She whispered in Casey’s ear and then chuckled as she looked at the rest of the squad. “I need to steal her for a bit but promise I’ll bring her back.” She grabbed Casey’s hand and pulled her to the elevator. Once the doors closed, she pinned Casey against the wall and smirked. “First day back and you already want to tease me in front of everyone?”

Casey shrugged. “Is that wrong?” She smirked as she pulled Alex close to her by the collar of her coat.

Alex shook her head as she chuckled. “We’ll see how you like my teasing later.” She whispered against her lips as she kissed her, but once she heard the doors opening, she pulled away and winked at Casey.

“Do you think Liz would like to hear that we’re gonna be working together?” Casey grinned as they walked out of the elevator hand in hand.

“I think she’d like if we let her know we’re together in my office before she walks in on us again.” Alex laughed, pulling Casey close to her and Casey laughing with her as they walked out the precinct.