#feed cooler machine

[alltherelicsofalifelonglived]

what if i just lit the entire kitchen on fire

[ceilidho]

prompt: construction worker ghost and his elementary school teacher neighbour who made the poor decision to start feeding him (nsfw, 2k) [based on this old ask] [on ao3 here]

-

They say not to feed wild animals. 

It makes them grow soft, lazy. Alters their behaviour. Takes an animal previously capable of finding its own food dependent on humans for sustenance. Makes them lose their natural fear of humans and nearly always results in an increase in human-wildlife conflicts as they start to seek out people. It’s a known fact. You can’t go to a park without seeing it plastered on posters in the bathroom and on the sides of the vending machines under the gazebos where you purchase your post-hike iced tea and veggie roll to eat on a nearby bench. 

You know this. So you really don’t know what possessed you to leave a cooler full of sandwiches on your neighbour’s doormat before turning in for the night. 

He wakes up preternaturally early and leaves every morning around four-thirty or five o’clock on the dot. Sometimes in the fog of sleep, you wake to hear the door to the apartment beside yours crack open and slam shut, and then the sound of lumbering footsteps down the hall towards the staircase before that door opens and slams shut too. 

He never comes home before four o’clock at the earliest. That’s around when you come home from work as well, meaning that you sometimes catch him at the door, him covered in grime and reeking of old sweat while you come flouncing down the hall in whatever colourful dress you’d donned that morning, inevitably paint-splattered by the end of the day. Always something appropriate to wear at an elementary school but colourful enough to keep the kids’ eyes and attention on you. 

You’ve caught his name in half-whispered conversations with the property manager, but aside from that, all you know about Simon Riley is that he works in construction. He certainly looks the part: big, calloused hands with blunt, dirt-caked nails and cut up fingers, knuckles always swollen and thick. Body all strength and brawn. Hard hat tucked under his armpit and decorated with countless stickers from old job sites, the same way his forearm is covered in tattoos. 

You’ve even passed by his current job site once or twice—some new condo complex going up by the canal that’s forced you and hundreds of other commuters to leave an extra thirty minutes early to account for the road closures. You pointedly don’t bring that up in conversation though. That would just be rude. 

At least it would be something to talk about though.

It’s not like the two of you talk. You’re not close by any means. Though you moved in a few months ago, you haven’t had much luck mustering up the confidence to squeak out more than a hi to him in passing. When he grunts back something approximating a hello, it’s all you can do not to break your key in the lock when you hurry into your apartment and slam the door shut behind you, heart beating frantically in your chest. 

It’s humiliating. You’re a grown woman and you’ve talked to plenty of men before. You’ve dated plenty of men before. Just because this one speaks in monosyllables and stares at you with an intensity that makes your stomach churn and your palms grow sweaty doesn’t change anything. Just because this one is built like a redwood with wrists thick enough that you’d need both hands to wrap around doesn’t make him any different than any other person.

And yet, when Simon asks you for your name on a rainy June afternoon after you’ve come in after him for a change only to find him sifting through letters at the mailbox, you garble out something that sounds nothing like your name before scurrying up the stairs to your flat.

It’s humiliating. It’s humid outside and your dress is sticking to all the wrong places (namely, your nipples and the inside of your thighs when the skirt swishes between your legs with each stride) and now you’ve made an ass of yourself in front of the only hot guy in your building. There are serial arsonists with more charm than you. 

So maybe the sandwiches are an apology letter or an olive branch. Or maybe it just makes your heart race to think of Simon opening up the cooler and finding four wax paper-wrapped sandwiches tucked neatly over ice packs. 

All you know is that when you step out of your apartment the next morning, the cooler is empty on your doormat, the lid propped open. He must have taken them with him. 

You smile. A job well done. Apology served fresh, with cucumber slices in the middle. 

The problem starts when you don’t leave him another cooler full of sandwiches on his doormat the next day. 

You didn’t consider that he might think you’d make it a habit. Perhaps that’s partially on you for not leaving a note on the cooler the first time to explain that it was just a one-off; just a way to apologize for being less than chipper around him. But instead of shrugging it off, you come home after a long day to find him standing right outside your apartment, arms crossed over his chest, thick biceps straining against his sweat-stained shirt. 

“Open the door,” Simon commands, nostrils flaring as he glares down at you. He jerks his head towards your door when you just frown, not following. “Been starving here waiting for you to show up.”

You open your mouth to say something, but nothing comes out. You’re at a loss for words, never mind that your whole job involves talking. He leaves you speechless though. 

Simon doesn’t move when you step close enough to unlock the door. You try to keep your body angled away so as not to brush up against him, but it’s inevitable. He doesn’t move when the door opens either, forcing you to squeeze by him. 

He goes straight to the kitchen and drags a chair out, letting it scrape across the floor like men always do before taking a seat. You follow after him nervously, apprehensive at having a man in your space. Not just a man, but Simon Riley. It feels sacrilege—not like he has no right being in your space, but you can’t imagine him here, sitting at your tiny dining room table like he comes over for dinner every Sunday. 

When he catches you standing under the archway to the kitchen just staring at him, he barks, “Well?”

That has you scurrying over to the fridge to pull out the cold cuts and pickled red onions. There’s a loaf of bread already on the counter, the bag twisted and tucked underneath because you had to leave in a rush this morning. You don’t know half of what you pile on the sandwiches, but whatever you serve him must satisfy him because Simon digs in with gusto, finishing the plate off in only a few bites while you wash the cutlery in the sink. You watch him out of the corner of your eye the whole while.

He leaves not too long after that, only a light warning for you to not miss tomorrow’s lunch before heading back over to his own apartment. You don’t even get a word in edgewise. 

It becomes something of a routine after that and not one you have any control over. Every night before bed, you leave him a cooler full of sandwiches and other things like cut up fruit or slices of cheese on his doormat, and every afternoon you rock up to him waiting on your doorstep, demanding to be let in. 

He takes to giving you a wet kiss before he leaves, all tongue and his fingers curled around the nape of your neck, holding you in place. When you try to cover his mouth with your hand, he nips at your fingers until you move them and let him slip you some tongue. 

The day you make him a casserole for supper, he bends you over the back of your couch and eats you out. Simon eats like a man starving, glutting himself on the wetness between your legs, licking even over the furl of your asshole and chuckling under his breath when you squeal and flail, your toes just brushing against the floor. 

In the aftermath, you sit panting in his lap while he eats. He gets up only briefly to get the bowl of strawberries and cream you left chilling in the fridge before lifting you up and putting you right back in his lap. You stare bleary-eyed when he holds a finger covered in cream up to your lips.

“Clean me up, pet,” he says, then watches you with half-lidded eyes while you lick his finger clean. 

He makes you suck his fingers too, to keep things even. He does it when you’re angled half off the bed, thick digits stuffed down your throat until your eyes leak big, fat tears that he licks away, hungry for those too. The man is always hungry, always keen to fill his belly. 

The arrangement continues on long enough to become normal, even routine. Simon shows up at your door every day after work waiting to be fed, and then makes you come a couple times before he leaves, a little thank you to repay you for the food. He never really says all that much when he comes around, not a conversationalist of a man. His preference is to eat, fuck, and leave, which you’re happy to accommodate, still too tongue-tied yourself to broach a real conversation. 

That’s all before he starts helping himself to your bed for a quick nap after a big supper. Then for naps that turn into a full night’s sleep, snoring like a chainsaw under the covers with you tucked under his arm, naked breasts pressed against his side, keeping you awake most of the night until you pass out somewhere around one A.M. 

Just as you suspected, Simon gets up at around four or five to be at the jobsite on time, but at your place, he gets up a bit earlier to help himself to breakfast. He doesn't even bother waking you up, just turns you over onto your tummy and spreads your legs before sinking his dick into where you're still stretched out from the night before. If you wake up or squirm, he just leans down and murmurs, “S'alright, pet…just need a pick me up before work. Go back to sleep, you’re okay,” and ruts between your thighs until he comes inside you and leaves you all wet in bed with one last messy kiss to your temple. 

The door slams shut on his way out. 

Because you feed him, he keeps coming back. The workday passes in a blur: attendance, a spelling test, recess, maths in the afternoon, and then you’re driving home in the same daze that has you slamming on the brakes before rear ending an old woman who stopped two cars behind the truck at the redlight ahead. 

You’re home earlier than him for a change, so you unlock the door quickly while there’s still a chance to avoid him. No such luck. When Simon turns up, he pounds on the door until you let him in. And you do. 

It’s a wonder you haven’t come apart at the seams, horny and pent up after this morning. You were too sleepy to come after all, rode hard and put away wet. Still, you flit nervously around the apartment, looking everywhere but at him. 

He always smells rich after working all day in the sun, like sweat and dirt. It's not a particularly nice smell, but it still kind of gets you going. He goes for a shower and then collapses on the couch after, beckoning you over to you crawl into his lap and grind yourself on his thigh because he knows of course. Simon can probably smell it on you, the ache. He shushes you when you whine about it, big hands fitting around your hips and pressing you down until your clit rubs deliciously against the muscle of his thigh and your head goes cloudy, cheek mushed against the pillow of his chest. 

When you come, Simon tips your chin up with his knuckle and murmurs, “Knickers off, love. Haven’t got my fill.”

He feeds you your own slick from his fingers when he kneels on the floor in front of the couch, your legs draped over his shoulders. Your fingers scratch helplessly over shorn blond hair, buzzed almost to the scalp. It’s prickly under your fingertips. 

Simon’s a messy eater. Your slick dribbles down his lips and glistens on his chin. It makes the blood roar under your skin, feverishly hot. 

“Please, Simon,” you whine, tears pricking at the corners of your eyes. “It hurts.”

You feel his lips quirk up against the folds of your pussy, the flat of his tongue running up the seam and flicking over your clit. He chuckles when your hips jerk. “Greedy aren’t you, pet? Didn’t even say thank you for getting on my knees.”

“You didn’t make me come!”

His voice borders on mocking when he coos, “Poor little thing. It’s gonna be a lot longer ‘til she gets to come if you don’t say thank you.”

Your brain goes staticy, fingers twitching on his scalp. His words echo back in your head. It’s rubbish, is what it is. All this time and he’s never said thank you once for the countless meals you’ve fed him. Indignation bubbles up in you, rising to the surface like fat on the cream, and you raise a hand to rub the tears from your eyes, a harsh rebuke on the tip of your tongue.

The protest dies on your lips when he meets your gaze. It’s hungrier than anything you’ve ever seen. Whatever animal lives under his skin stares back at you with black eyes, drool leaking from its jowls. It’s mindless, intent only on slaking its hunger. Filling its empty belly. And it is not afraid of you anymore. It knows you’ll feed it until it’s full. It knows you won’t let it go hungry anymore. 

So, always leery of the bigger animal in the room, you mumble out a chest-thick, “Thank you,” and shiver when he grins. 

There’s a reason they tell you not to feed strays. They often come back for more.

[seat-safety-switch]

As human beings, we’re not used to thinking of things being produced in industrial settings by machines. When you go to the grocery store and pick up a can of gravy, you’re not thinking about the immense machinery at the Franco-American factory, behind armoured anti-truck emplacements, pumping it out all day long. Because we are social animals, we don’t like to think about machines doing our work.

You want to believe that it’s done by individual human beings, labouring at the factory, watching for anything going wrong, committed to that product. Even if that product does cost thirty-five cents a can, isn’t a consistent shade of brown, and makes you feel like you might be about to die if you drink a mere five of them in one sitting.

Truth is, the advancement of humanity has largely been done through automation. And one of those automations, the motor vehicle, is the only good one that has ever existed. Horses are lazy and require feeding even when you’re not driving them somewhere, and walking to the next town over wears out your shoes too quickly. Human beings are simply too delicate and inconsistent to trust to any difficult or mind-numbing labour. We stop paying attention to the gravy machine, for instance, when we’re thinking about last night’s TV movie production. A machine is a better use, which frees us up.

Doubters will often say that these machines take away our jobs. And they do, but they’re shitty, awful jobs supervising the gravy machine. The problem is that there hasn’t been any replacement. Our industrial betters sneer at our jobless masses left soaking in the gutter.

This is why, when I become Prime Minister, I will create a whole shitload of cooler jobs for us to do while the machines are busy making products for us to enjoy. For instance, there currently aren’t a lot of astronauts. I will create a thousand new positions for astronauts. Will all of them make it back to earth? Maybe! At least it won’t be boring to find out. What about pinball repair? There’s hardly any jobs in that right now, but that sounds pretty good too. I’ll open Pinball Canada and we’ll make a government-socialized pinball machine that breaks down all the fucking time, so you have lots of little surprises to keep your mind active.

What you won’t have is thirty-five cent gravy. We’re gonna force the factory owner to turn up the “quality” lever to at least thirty-seven cent gravy. You’ll be able to afford the increase with all the tips you’ll make from your pinball repair gig.

[britt-kageryuu]

Donnie and Mikey are in the kitchen set, they're both in chef's uniform. Though Donnie has his AR glasses on, they offered Mikey a pair, but he declined because 'it would distract him from cooking'.

They're making 'Summer Snacks with some science'.

Donnie grabs an odd looking device and sets it up while the audience is questioning what it is. Mikey has returned with salt, cream, a few random labeled canisters, and a cooler.

"Okay, so now we're going to show you some easy ways to make your own icecream. Though results may vary, this is how we make it." Donnie explains while pulling a few pint sized tubes from inside the machine.

"Oooohh, there's so many possible flavors to make!" Mikey gushes while placing down ingredients, "I want to try mixing up this one flavor I saw pop up in my feed. What was the mixture again?" Mikey pulls out his phone to look up the recipe.

"While you do that, I will start with a sorbet recipe, and see how if it sets properly. We haven't messed with sorbet as much, I don't think it's too different, but it's for food science!" Donnie exclaimed as he grabs a food processor type gadget. He has a projection of a recipe floating next to him. "Okay, so depending on which recipe, this either needs sugar, or syrup, fruit puree or juice... it's almost just a more complex juice pop than something like icecream."

"I think I found the one I saw earlier!" Mikey announces while holding his phone in the air. "Alright, so we just need to make a vanilla base, and add a few extra things. Though we need to substitute a couple ingredients in this one."

"It has nuts in it?" Donnie questions while tossing some cut up fruit into the food processor.

"It has nuts in it." Mikey confirmed, "I wonder if I could switch it for sunflower seeds, or would it mess up the taste?" He asked out loud while looking over the ingredients they have prepared.

"Well these will just be small batches, so just test it out. If it doesn't work, Red will still eat it. Since it shouldn't trigger his nut allergies." Donnie replies back while measuring out the sugar to add to the sorbet mixture.

Mikey nods his head, then starts grabbing what he needs to make the vanilla ice cream base for his mix.

Donnie then cleared his throat, "Now for those who have been asking, this device is a custom built Ice Cream Maker, that makes multiple small batches at once. You put the mixture into these tubes, and they go inside the machine where it gets a bit tumbled and mixes while being super chilled." Donnie has some videos demonstrating how the machine works pop up while he explains this.

"It's very handy for when we all can't agree on which flavor we want to make. Or we want to mess around with multiple flavors." Mikey adds while mixing together the cream, milk, sugar, some salt, and some fresh-ish vanilla bean.

The audience watched as the two mix together several ice cream mixtures that get put into the Ice Cream maker, and a few Sorbet mixes get put into the freezer.

"While those get mixed and set, let's use the rest of this fruit to make some refreshing drink mixes!" Mikey shouts while Donnie cleans up some of the work area.

"Let's hope we still have some of that delicious melon left. Because you're still banned from that farmers market right?" Donnie asks nonchalantly with a small smug look.

Mikey freezes before turning towards Donnie with a harsh glare, "You know good and well, that it was not my fault! He wanted $50 for a small bag of citrus fruits, that were $10 at most at a different stall." He says with a slight growl.

"Well you didn't need to beat him up over it."

"He said my culinary skills were worse than prison quality! Prison Quality! He deserved to be sent to the worst prison in the world for that!!!" Mikey yells, shocking the audience.

The audience are spamming the chat with lots of confused messages and emojis combinations.

"I would question why he insulted your cooking, but I don't want to get on Dr. Delicate Touch's bad side." Donnie says, "Do we have any club soda left, of do we need to send Blue to get more?" They add to try redirect the subject, and not get something thrown at him for bringing up the topic in the first place.

The continue on with testing out drinks, until the timer went off to check on the ice cream. The audience split on wanting to know more about Mikey getting banned from a farmers market, and wanting to talk about what the duo was making during the stream.

----------------

Masterpost

I had at least part of this story as a prompt planned for a while. The rest was just 'I want to write Smarts and Crafts doing something together'.

[bloodyknucklesforme]

Drag My Teeth Across Your Beating Heart | Carnal XV

Carnal (adjective) : relating to or given to crude bodily pleasures and appetites

Simon was born with what his father called 'The Curse'. A wanton craving for taboo meat. Since meeting the similarly cursed Johnny, the two had formed a bond. They didn't just fight together, they ate together, slept together, and shared everything.

When a favor to Price reveals another cursed person, Simon worries she could destroy everything.

Masterpost

CW: cannibalism, smut, voyeurism

This is very much a horror fic mostly based around the films Raw (2017) and Bones and All (2022), if you sit through those you should be good here. This is my first horror fic.

Chapter Title Credit: Howl - Florence + The Machine

Body disposal isn't hard, not for Simon. It was a ritual. One passed down from his father. 

Disfigure

Dismember

Dispose

As easy as any prayer. On his knees, a rag over his mouth and nose, a saw in hand. A ritual like any other. This time it felt like mass without the sacrament. Nothing to slip into his mouth, no savior, no priest. 

He’d never been one for church. His mum had dragged him and Tommy a couple times mostly for Christmas and Easter Sunday. The only days that mattered. They’d been baptized Catholic because that’s what his father was raised as but never did any of the following sacraments. They’d stopped going by the time he was ten and he stopped believing in any possibility of a God after that first meal with his father. 

He had a new religion. Led by his father. He supposed all fathers are god in a sense. That’s what it felt like the first time they ate together. Divine Salvation.

The stable smelled like rot. It was cold enough that the body hadn’t started to turn to sludge but the smell was acrid. He stripped his clothes and left them folded on a table in the tack room. Skin is easier to clean than cloth. 

As many pieces as possible. Start with the joints and a brick, smash until the bones break then cut through the flesh. Humans are fragile.  His father had taught him that at a young age. Even the smooth leather of a belt could cut skin if struck hard enough. Soft skin made him feel vulnerable. Calluses were armor. 

He liked soft on others. Spilling between his fingers. Made him feel powerful. A show of strength to hold something fragile and not break it apart. 

Nina looked soft, like the flesh of her neck would mold into his hands. His arm had wrapped around her waist so fittingly. 

Johnny still had soft parts. Thighs, neck, arse. His favorite position was Johnny on his back, thighs wrapped around his waist. Simon would grip his arse like it held him to earth. Simon’s teeth would drag against Johnny’s throat. He’d cum inside him and Johnny’s spend would slick between them. 

When Johnny asked Simon to bite him last Summer, it twisted something nasty in his stomach. The monster he’d always fought down reared its head. The same monster that controlled his father. The one that took control in Mexico all those years ago. 

He hacked and hacked at the body. The smaller the parts the better. The harder to reconstruct, the easier to scatter. He’d seen crows nearby. He could feed them over the winter with this. Simon never liked waste. 

He took a hammer to the teeth, porcelain pieces. Tips of the fingers cut off. No tattoos to skin off this time. Man to meat. 

It took several hours. The floor of the stall was covered in blood. He was covered in blood. There was a hose, still working. He gathered the meat into a cooler and sprayed down the stall and then himself. He paced the stable, keeping his blood warm while he dried off.

There was something sweet in the air. Straw and glass, brown with Nina’s blood from the other day. Johnny’s scent was mixed in there too. She’d been wearing his clothes at the time. His cock twitched. He smacked the side of his face to snap himself back.

Gathered his clothes and walked back to the house. He heard them as he stepped inside. Johnny’s hurried babbling and Nina’s moans. He quietly took his boots off and crept towards the sound. It was wrong, yes. Hearing Johnny again made his blood hot. 

There was a mirror on the wall opposite them. From his angle in the hall, he could watch unseen. They were mostly clothed, only a small disappointment. His cock strained against his jeans. 

They looked good together. Like something meant to be. Even with Johnny’s lack of experience he could work her up well. Simon watched the muscles in her back stretch, sweat glide down her back. He wanted to walk in, lick it off. Slip his hand between her legs. Tell Johnny what to do, how to touch her. He wanted to show her where to nip and where to kiss. Johnny fell apart whenever Simon’s teeth grazed where his jaw met his ear. 

She was crying Johnny’s name. Johnny stared up at her with glazed eyes, the same eyes that used to look at him. Those eyes flicked to the mirror and Simon took a step back. He crept back down the hall and outside. He walked back to the stable. 

He found himself by the pile of bloodied straw and glass. He grabbed a handful of straw and held it near his face, breathing in. He fumbled with his zipper and button, haphazardly pulling his cock out. 

His fantasies were a crowded mess of bodies, sweat and cum. Nina and Johnny’s smell mixing with his, herby and sweet. All the positions they could arrange themselves in. Take turns riding and fucking. He wanted Nina to sit on his face while Johnny rode him. Fuck Johnny while he buried his face into Nina’s cunt. 

Simon groaned, cum mixing with the mess on the floor in front of him. He sighed, shaking his hand off. He’d have to wash the floor again. 

He stood, looking at the floor, the smell making his eyes roll back. He wanted the three of them to be together. He would make it happen. He tried being the lone wolf. Separate himself from Johnny but look at what had happened. They both needed him. Johnny can’t hunt on his own and Nina seemed incapable of it entirely. He’d have to teach them both. Keep them alive. 

They’d have this house, some place to stay. No more shitty hotels and hostels or car back seats. He could outfit the cellar to better butcher meat.He never told Johnny but he didn’t even have a flat himself. Any leave had him traveling around, hunting and camping. They’d never go hungry. It could be good. Something stable. 

He thought about his family. The ones he failed. He could still smell them, his stomach twisting while his mouth watered. He made a vow that night. He was the only one allowed to eat his loved ones. It was only right. His right. He’d failed them. He wouldn’t fail Johnny or Nina. 

He made dinner that night. Steak cooked with garlic, butter and thyme. The smell dragged both Johnny and Nina out of their bedrooms and to him. Nina’s hair was still damp from her shower. Made the whole house smell like vanilla. 

“Nina,” he said after they’d all sat down. She looked up from her plate. Her chair was touching Johnny’s. Simon laid a hand on Johnny’s thigh, earning a side glance.  “I want to teach you how to hunt.”

“When?” She asked through a mouthful of food.

“This weekend.”

“Si-” Johnny attempted to interrupt.

“Do you want to learn?”

“Yes.”

“Good,” he smiled. 

Tag list: @gogh-with-the-flow @queen-ilmaree @cathnoneofyourbusiness @pssytrux

[battleangel]

The End of Weird Anime

What happens to 80s & 90s anime that arent streaming right now when VHS & DVD completely go away?

The obsession with micro everything, everythings a sound bite, everything is 5 to 7 seconds, even songs, the chorus IS the song now, noone else ever hears anything else.

Only sports, reality TV and competition games can be watched week to week in real time.

All TV series now have to be immediately binged and consumed.

Its essentially bulimia.

Binge Loki in a weekend. Binge Ahsoka in a weekend. Its already done.

Whats next.

What else can I feed the machine with.

No waiting week to week. No such thing as a cliffhanger. No anticipation. No guessing whats next. No watching together as an audience.

Everything segmented, everything bifurcated, nothing in real time, nothing communal.

No season finale, no season premiere.

Same with anime.

Its not VHS or DVD anymore.

Youre not waiting for a release.

Its crunchyroll and Netflix and Funimation and Hulu and streaming.

Its the entire season of Psycho Pass all at once whenever I want to binge and gorge myself.

No asking to be taken to the mall.

No driving to Suncoast Video.

No deciding which $30 VHS or DVD to ask to be bought.

Martian Successor Nadesico or Ayashi no Ceres?

Everything is accessible.

Its less for 3 months of streaming anime than 1 anime used to cost on VHS or DVD.

No downside, if it sucks, move on.

Its not even the old school illegal Crunchyroll which was essentially Limewire for anime where you could illegally download different series.

I didnt waste time downloading for hours on my brothers computer for a shitty anime.

I didnt risk getting a virus on my brothers computer.

I dont have to clear up space.

I dont have to waste time.

I dont have to spend money.

I dont have to risk anything.

I dont have to exert any effort.

Its just, on to the next.

What does the algorithm say a Demon Slayer fan should watch next?

What should I watch now that Attack on Titan is over per the almighty algorithm?

No Viz anime catalogue to pore through.

No RightStuf catalog to highlight and fold the corners of the pages of.

No Animerica to read through every month once it arrives in the mail.

No going through AOL message boards and anime ezboards and geocities and angelfire websites to try to determine what to watch next.

No asking to be taken to your local Blockbuster to check the newest anime rentals in the "Independent/Foreign" section.

Just scroll, select, click and move on.

No need to even download and delete.

Its all streamable, instantly consumed, immediately binged then thats it.

On to the next algorithmic recommendation.

The algorithm never ends.

It always has another suggestion for you.

No meticulously going through myanimelist.com, putting up the hundreds of anime youve watched so far then scouring everyone elses lists to get ideas for new anime to watch.

Whats next after Vision of Escaflowne?

What should I watch after Yuu Yuu Hakusho?

If I can get a ride to the flea market on 18, I wonder what else they'll have similar to Dangaioh & Orguss 02?

To Macross Plus?

I wonder if Sci-Fi Channels Anime Week Festival will show something similr to Iria Zeiram or Armitage III this year.

Ninja Scroll was amazing, I wish I could see Wicked City since its by the same director, Yoshiaki Kawajiri. But I know I wont be allowed to. I had to sneak watch Ninja Scroll at my friends house and her older brother had bought it and thats the only way I even got to see Ninja Scroll at 13.

Everyone talks about Sailor Moon but noone talks about Bubblegum Crisis 2032.

Why not? The Knight Sabers are cooler than the Sailor Scouts and Ill take a cool motorcyle riding ass kicking punk rock singer like Priscilla Asagiri over a whiny, annoying, immature Serena any day. I dont care that shes 14 like me. Shes freaking annoying and a crybaby.

I wonder what other anime are like 8 Man After. It was so hard-boiled and dystopian and futuristic.

What happens to 80s & 90s anime that arent streaming right now when VHS & DVD completely go away?

When laptops and videogame systems are discless?

Then what?

What happens when Crunchyroll, Netflix and Hulu dont want to pay to license some amazing anime that are hidden gems?

In 25 years, when very few VCRS and DVD players and video game systems and laptops that can play VHS tapes and discs are still in circulation and functioning, then what happens?

What their plan has been this whole time: we will only have access to watch what the streaming companies CHOOSE to pay the license for to stream.

We will lose everything else.

We'll lose Cybernetics Guardian, Genocyber, Twilight of the Dark Master, Robot Carnival, Vision of Escaflowne, Iria Zeiram, Armitage III, Saber Marionette J, Martian Successor Nadesico, 8 Man After, Lensman, Demon City Shinjuku, Fancy Lala, Tekknoman, Full Metal Panic...

Only the biggest hits, the most iconic series, the most controversial OVAs and movies will survive in the brand new streaming world devoid of any physical VHSs and DVDs.

Only the Akiras, Neon Genesis Evangelions, Urotsuki Dojis, Berserks, Gantzs, Sailor Moons, Dragon Ball Zs, Pokemons, Gundams, Bleaches, Narutos and Spirited Aways will survive to be streamed.

What about the Serial Experiments Lain?

What about the Nausicaa of the Valley Winds?

What about the Angel Sanctuarys?

What about the Please Save My Earths?

What about the Here is Greenwoods?

Will they be lost forever?

[anhonestdaysworkcomic]

TELL US SOMETHING COOL AVOUT MEDIEVAL FARMING PLEASE!!!

GLADLY

ALSO sorry this took so long to answer. Every time I remembered I wanted to reply, I was at work and didn't have my notes in front of me.

SOME THINGS I THINK ARE COOL ABOUT MEDIEVAL FARMING (and/or historical farming because some of these are earlier)

So the Romans are usually credited with bringing the coulter (a sharp knife at the end of a plough) to the Celts, but there's evidence the Celts already had this technology due to 7th century carvings found on a rock in Val Camonica. Pliny also wrote that the Celts in Raetia invented the wheeled plough

Also! Apparently ploughs were usually shared throughout villages and were kept at the church to be rented out accordingly

The Celts also had a harvesting machine as early as the 2nd century!! The Celts called it a messor (and the Romans called it a vallus) but its essentially a cart with "teeth" on it and as it's pulled through a field (by oxen) the grain/corn would be pulled through said teeth and the ear would be torn off the stalk and fall into the cart

Another neat thing I found was how the Celts stored their grain!! They would place the harvested grain in souterrains- which were large holes dug into rock (usually chalk) and then covered and sealed with moist clay and then topped w soil. Apparently as the grain is exposed to the damp walls they germinate and use up all the oxygen while also releasing carbon dioxide which causes the grain to sit in a sort of suspended animation, keeping it preserved.

They also used small, raised granaries as a storage method, but I think the souterrain is cooler. You can also make silage with a souterrain!! (silage is fermented grass to feed your animals as a supplement to Hay)

Also Hay is just dried grass. I always thought it was a grain or something like wheat. But no, it's dried grass. Also you can't harvest hay if it rains. You need like a week of good weather so the hay can dry out before you bundle it and deposit into a barn/hut/loft

I also learned there's different farming. You can do pastoral or arable farming (or some combination of the two.) But pastoral farming is about cultivating animals and arable farming is about growing crops, and what you focused on tended to be dictated by the landscape. Steep areas are hard to grow crops on, so you'd focus on animals (especially ones that do good with unsure footing like sheep and goats.) But if you have nice weather and flatter land then you'd focus on growing crops

I'm planning to place this story in a setting similar to the Alps, and they have a fun tradition where in the spring they migrate their cattle to higher altitudes (the actual alps) so they can graze in high altitude pastures during the summer (there's also a lot of cheese making during this time,) and then during the fall the cows migrate back down to the valley before it gets too cold

Oh, and this is a silly tidbit; but apparently Julius Ceaser thought the Celts regarded chickens as holy and thought that they never ate them. The Celts did eat their chickens (waste not want not and all that.) They also used to host chicken fights

I've learned a lot more than this, but these are the best tidbits

Thank you for asking!! This was my favorite ask to get!!

[mintakablue]

cool details i noticed + things i loved in across the spiderverse

spoilers ahead!

i think the stylization of the different spiders was even more distinct in this movie than the last one! i like that when the camera is focused on certain characters, you get their aesthetic “bleed” into the world (e.g. gwen’s painterly strokes in her silhouette bleeding outwards, miles and his family having chromatic aberrations in theirs, manny’s chunkier outline, etc.)

i LOVE that the spot is miles’ nemesis for a couple different reasons. he aesthetically opposes how colorful miles’ world is, he is a “villain of the week” that peter parker originally faces off against rather than miles, the major inversion he gets (becoming black with white spots) kind of feeds into the underlying theme of asking who the good guys are--especially when we learn that miles would have been prowler in earth-42! obviously also the fact that he and miles are both anomalies is great. i also think it’s good meta humor to have made the bagel guy become the spot.

there’s also a bagel billboard above the spot’s apartment. in some ways very fortuitous that everything everywhere all at once related bagels to the multiverse.

the stylization of three side characters really stuck out to me--pavitr, ben reilly, and of course, hobie! i love pavitr and mumbattan, i think it was a good choice for the trailer and stylistically a really strong and complementary style to bridge miles’ transition into this aspect of the spiderverse. ben reilly’s stylization i love because it evokes the mobile spiderverse game that introduced a lot of people to some of the more obscure spiders. and DUH i love hobie’s style, you can really tell that they incorporated tons of actual britpunk influences in there. also let me not forget margo kess! she’s so cute in this i genuinely like that she’s a VR spider. i hope to god they make jokes about her being on the web. please.

on that note i do like that the prop design also retains obvious notes of which things belong to which spiders! hobie’s is obvious, but you also see it with gwen’s items. also i like that each spider has a different way of swinging through the air that’s more obvious in this one! gwen and pavitr both have an dancerlike quality to them, hobie’s is a little more erratic (anarchist), and miles of course is still figuring out how to nail some of those more tight swings, but he’s way cooler with being in freefall than any of the other spiders. also miguel using his claws instead of swinging and jess using her motorcycle were very cool! lots of aerial play in this one that i’m excited to watch again and follow the eyetrace for.

good moments with miles and his family! i almost always hate the moody teenager plot because it’s like. you don’t see why they even Should care about their family or the family is so overbearing you start just siding with the teenager, but this movie struck a really good balance there for me. also i just really really like that there are scenes where miles and his mom just speak spanish with each other :’) the rooftop party was so real to me. i am not Latine or live in ny, but i am Filipino and i have been at one million parties like that with my family. and those pink cake boxes from a small bakery that your parents like is iconic.

i genuinely enjoyed the commentary on faking the struggle to get into school LMFAO i think that’s very real for a subset of poc, but especially more affluent Black and Latine people.

OH YEAH miles cracks a joke about ATM machines and then pavitr (my king) cracks the same kind of joke about chai tea and naan bread. a bit of an old joke but hey the movie has been in production for 2.5 years and i do think it serves to highlight the way that spidermen crack the same joke. especially when after in the spiderverse HQ a ton of other spidermen crack the same kinds of jokes about spotting The Spot. across the spiderverse, spidermen are the same

pointing spiderman meme is terribly funny i will stand by that forever

more funny meta commentary about donald glover being people’s pick for miles’ voice and not becoming spiderman, so he’s the prowler--in the same way that miles, had he not become spiderman, would have been the prowler. more obvious is his appearance in mcu spiderman, but i still think it’s fun foreshadowing!

on foreshadowing, i think this movie does a great job of laying out a lot of those bits of information. starting off with highlighting earth-42 and making sure you know that sticks in your mind (and it’s also impossible to choose the number 42 and not evoke the cultural memory of hitchhiker’s guide lol), having the spot talk about how the spider came from a different earth, getting another glimpse at it, seeing miles’ earth number right in the splash screen, saying that the big spider device sends you back to your universe via DNA analysis + margo seeing the big EARTH-42 instead of earth-1610 on the screen. and then even in earth-42, the color palette is really different from 1610! 1610′s opposing color for miles is like a deep blue color (opposing his red suit accent), so 42 having a primarily green palette opposes the prowler’s purple accent!

not to mention that when miles pulls into his bedroom, you can see that he doesn’t have a drawing desk up (or his sashimi/supreme poster). i think it’s a sad little detail that the movie seems to imply that his mom didn’t notice a major change in his appearance (having a short afro instead of braids) is because she works so much she doesn’t see him that often :(

fun sound design in this movie! in the scene where miles-42 gets revealed as the prowler, you actually hear that growling sound effect first when miles-1610 gets tackled and then again twice: once we see miles-42 in shadow as the prowler, then when he says his name!

in fact there’s actually tons of fun sound design details! miguel gets a futuristic sting, gwen has like a full on leitmotif, miles has a short leitmotif which i believe is part of “what’s up danger” (i would need to go back and watch the movie a second time to really pick up on it), pavitr and hobie have their own musical instruments associated with them... and even the spider from earth-42 has its own sting! i might have misheard, but i actually also think hobie and pavitr’s “thwip” sounds are a little different than the standard ones!

i love when those little notes show up in the lower corner. very comic book! a lot of those details make me smile, i really feel like they cared a lot about evoking some of the writing styles of different spiderverse writers there

aesthetically and tangentially related, i like the sketchiness of some of the characters! it’s most obvious in the spot and the alternate universe vulture, but it’s such a neat visual trick. it also serves to give the spot an almost “unfinished” look while also giving him better volume. very excited to see the behind the scenes from the riggers/animators/3d artists

the idea of canon events is such a good one for spiderverse--i think it’s great! one of them that i’m almost certain they’ll bring up in the next one is that. um. gwen usually dies when spiderman is trying to save her. straight up i actually thought they were going to pull that one instead of officer singh dying after gayatri is falling! after all spider-gwen almost got shot, plus miles straight up almost drops her after he glitches out in mumbattan. sony please don’t break spider-gwen’s neck...

genuinely loved all the calls to different spidermen too! there’s like one really prominent shot of paperbag spiderman that made me and my sibling giggle. here’s how the fantastic four can still win

in that vein, i have at least Some prediction of what the spiderverse resolution will be? i can imagine that because miles is an anomaly, his canon event breaking might actually be permissible to some degree... perhaps only if he returns to his own earth? truly truly i cannot IMAGINE that they would make us watch his dad straight up die onscreen because like MAN we already watched his uncle die. that would be way too devastating... but obviously miles-42 and miles-1610 have a lot to say to each other about watching an older man in your life that you love die. i’m a little back and forth about the idea that miles was “destined” in some way to become the prowler in an alternate universe but i’m gonna put my faith in the team to not make it weird ykwim. seeing as they already slipped in commentary about the fact that like Yeah it’s partially because miles’ family has money in 1610 that he is even able to “stay out of trouble” i think there will be an interesting conversation to be had about class dynamics between miles-42 and miles-1610! i am like wildly excited for the next one, i have a lot of hope that it will be even more gorgeous than this movie was and will have the same depth of writing/foreshadowing!

lastly and i know i’m just saying this because to ME spiderman is a very trans character. but peter parker from spider-gwen’s universe was just taking his testosterone okay. and spider-gwen having that painterly pink blue and white as she was saying essentially “i want to live my life fully in my identity” was so... happy pride!!!

[mikeyforreal]

some random adrian chase head cannons :P

a/n: just some random thought about my favorite crime-fighting goofball :)

cw: fluff, some cussing, a few depictions of violence

miscellaneous hcs

• okay so first off, i know this isn't really a head cannon but james gunn confirmed that the visor in vig's suit is prescription and idk i just love that fact

• anyway, real head cannons now

• i'm like 99.99% sure he has a playlist for when he's on patrol and makes chris listen to it with him

• also, i think he'd have the same wired earphones from like 2014 that came with his iphone 6

• adrian's favorite candy is probably skittles or m&ms because of the fun colors (sometimes he likes to sort them if he's feeling a bit bored)

• i just know he has a collection of vhs tapes that he bought from a secondhand store/had as a kid

• speaking of collections he probably also has a bunch of cd's

• i dunno why but i feel like adrian loves star wars and has since he was little (and also has all the og trilogy movies on vhs)

• definitely has a cheap walmart lightsaber lying around somewhere

• GOLDEN RETRIEVER ENERGY !!!

• i feel like as a kid he loved finding bugs, digging for worms, ect.

• one time he tried eating one, didn't turn out good for him (he couldn't stop throwing up for like 3 days)

• since it's cannon he played/plays dnd, he'd probably play magic, the gathering as well 😭

• i also think that he'd really love the artificial grape flavor ??

• LMAO i think he'd have a little chainsaw keychain lying around somewhere

• def listens to abba, spice girls, and yung gravy

• probably good with kids? he'd set the the house on fire if he watched some but he can keep them entertained at least ?

• manchild (i will not elaborate)

• he reminds me of jake peralta from brooklyn-99

being best friends/in a relationship with adrian

• let's face it, they're practically the same thing

• i justttt know that he made like 10 secret handshakes for the two of you

• his love language is probably words of affirmation, quality time, or touch (maybe all of them, who knows)

• wants to teach you how to play mtg and dnd !!! (please let him teach you he'll be over the moon)

• def has a playlist that he wants to listen to with you

• two words: movie dates

• adrian loves watching movies with you !! even if he's seen it a few dozen times, he'd watch it again just to see your first time reactions :)

• THEMED COSTUMES !!!

• if you're down, he'd want to match with you ever year, something different and cooler than the last

• if you wear glasses, you better bet your ass that he's switching with you 24/7

• you cant go an hour without your glasses getting taken off and replaced with his

• also, i think that adrian wouldn't have the cleanest glasses 😭 you def gotta give 'em a good scrub every now and then

• dr. pepper enthusiast fs

• discounted/sometimes free food and fennel fields

• if you can work from home and go there often just to eat and work, he's definitely spending his 15 minute breaks (and longer than that) sitting with you and chatting

• he's always bringing home leftovers or breadsticks that he stole

• i think adrian has a pretty decent comic collection, and would go to shops with you for dates or hangouts

• he's probably super good friends with the owner (or at least that's what he thinks)

• when he's patrolling, he randomly facetimes you???

• like he has a guy near death and he's having a full conversation with you

• adrian has tonsss of silly and random nicknames for you !! he just calls you whatever you remind him of

• whenever he goes over to your place or vice versa, you two have a special knock that lets either of you know immediately who it is

• one of his ideal dates would probably be going to the park and feeding ducks !! (and him trying to catch them)

• he also randomly makes machine gun noises ?? what's that about ??

• the two of you'll just be chilling watching tv or something and then you hear 'CHCHCHCHC' and see him doing finger guns or whatever

• and when you ask him about it he's just like "what do you mean babe?"

• would probably beg you to get a little cat or a dog

• if you initially say no, he's gonna pull out a whole powerpoint presentation on why you should say yes (and he's wearing his fanciest clothes)

• FRIENDSHIP BRACELETS !!!

• it doesn't matter where or what they look like, if he sees some at the gas station, store, theme park, wherever, he's buying some for the two of you

• your relationship is basically that one scene in bobs burgers scene where tina makes a friendship bracelet for louise and tina's like "oh you don't have to wear it" and louise snatches it and says "no i'm gonna wear it forever, back off"

• proud malewife

• adrian is in the kitchen a lot, always fixing up snacks for you

a/n: let me know if i should make another one of these with another character !

[oicuperp]

do you have a personal review of American psycho to share

i really like some of the silly moments ,, like how he uses "i have to return some video tapes" as an excuse to get out of A LOT of situations , how he was gonna strangle some guy only for the guy to think patrick has finally decided to come out and wants to kiss , how he drops a chainsaw from the top of the stairs and SOMEHOW hits the girl perfectly , how mad he gets seeing other guys having a business card cooler than his , him trying to feed a cat to an ATM machine ...

besides that i just have a lot of questions ... like what happened with paul allen ... did patrick really kill him ... was the lawyer just lying because he doesnt really care that patrick killed an insane amount of people ... because yeah i guess the people he killed (besides paul) were part of minorities so ... yeag

and im really curious about why he changed his mind about killing jean ,, but thank god he didnt bc i really liked jean :3

anyway i think it was brilliantly done ,, really good and entertaining film !!!!

[sugoi-and-spice]

Chapter Fourteen - Chance Meetings

Pairing: Tomura Shigaraki x Fem!Reader, (3rd Person)

Rating: Explicit - Minors DNI

Summary: Tomura Shigaraki was her dad's boss's son. He was the creep that stole girls' underwear and tried to grope her in his room. But it's not like he could get her Dad fired just because she wouldn't sleep with him, right? ...right?

CW: Quirkless!AU, Explicit Smut, Dub-Con, Coercion, Blackmail, Cheating, Sexual Guilt, Humiliation, Unhealthy Relationships, Virginity Kink, Groping, Power Play, Hate to Love, Emotional Manipulation, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Animal Death

A/N: Happy New Year everyone! Sorry this chapter's out a little late, been doing lots of travelling.

Read Full Chapter on AO3

[excerpt]

“Tomura-kun!” her father greeted a little too happily (re: kiss-assey) as Shigaraki was led to the deluxe little camp the family had set up in the bleachers, “My wife just told me you were here. What a nice surprise!”

“Yeah, I guess…” he pulled his hand free to rub at his neck. A freedom that the younger brother seemed more than happy to grant.

“Onee-chan said he has to sit with us since he doesn’t have any friends,” he said, crossing his arms.

“That’s not what she said!” Shigaraki snapped at him — probably a bit too harshly. But that only seemed to amuse the young boy more. It seemed that a desire to piss him off ran in the family.

“Don’t be rude,” her mother scolded with a light swat to the youngest child’s hand before turning back to Shigaraki with a smile, “We’d love it if you’d sit with us, Tomura.”

She patted the open spot next to her encouragingly.

“O-Okay. Thanks…” he bowed, quick and awkward, then moved to sit down as far away from her as possible while still on the blanket they’d laid out.

“Have you eaten anything?” she asked as he settled, taking him by surprise. 

If he was being honest, he thought for sure that the family would pretty much ignore him once he actually sat down. And if he was being even more honest, he would have preferred it that way. He was completely ill-prepared to answer a question as high-stakes as “have you eaten” right now.

“Tomura?”

He quickly realized that he was taking entirely too long to answer, “Uh—”

A loud grumble interrupted and startled them both. He was pretty sure he’d never blushed this hard in his life as her mother laughed sympathetically.

“I’d say that answers that,” she turned to pull a cooler bag into her lap, “What kind of onigiri do you like? Pickled plum, bonito flakes—?”

“N-No, you don’t have to do that,” he waved his hands up at her and pointed back towards the entrance, “I’ll just grab something from the vending machine.”

“Don’t be silly! We always pack extra,” she insisted, opening up the bag, “And a growing boy like you needs a fresh breakfast!”

Shigaraki considered pointing out that at nineteen, he was actually done growing now, but the way she looked him in the eye left very little room to argue. So that was where her daughter had gotten that look…

He looked down to her insulated travel bag to get away from it and, true to her word, there was probably enough plastic-wrapped onigiri and snacks in that bag to feed the entire swim team. 

(When he thought critically about it, that was probably the reason why she had so much.)

And he’d be flat-out lying if he said it didn’t look delicious. He genuinely couldn’t remember the last time he’d had onigiri that wasn’t from a convenient store — had he ever, even? Kurogiri was nothing if not dedicated. Everything he cooked was a full, decadent meal — usually western. Quick and simple were not in his vocabulary. And each meal was always portioned out perfectly so as to never have any meaningful leftovers, nothing to make onigiri out of.

Of course, he knew that he could request anything he wanted to eat, that Kurogiri would be more than happy to make him onigiri if he asked. But then that would involve actually admitting that he was missing something in his life.

So buying stuff from the convenience store was just easier.

“...do you have salmon?” he finally muttered.

“Oh, tons!” she smiled, pulling one of the rice balls right from the top and handing it to him, “That’s my daughter’s favorite flavor too.”

The onigiri slipped a little in his hand at that, earning a knowing smirk from her mother. He kicked himself internally — what a stupid fucking thing to be so happy about. Who cared if she liked salmon? It’s not like that meant anything, it was the best flavor after all. She’d be stupid if she didn’t. Right?

…Ugh. This was going to be a long day.

Continue on AO3

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[derpoprime]

— Scrunkly Week Day 1

prompt(s): spare time & hobbies

d4dj headcanons for what happyaround! does when they're not absolutely killing it in the club (or working their way towards that). bearing in mind that i'm still on season one in-game. if any of this is canon—or disproven—eventually, i don't know it yet.

these will also intertwine with my queer headcanons for them, just a tiny bit. as a treat.

🍔 Rinku Aimoto (she/her)

- she's a crane game girl, i know this in my heart. she sees random machines out in the wild and goes insane if there's a cute plushie she wants

- buys fun foods whenever she comes across them. shit wallet management

- this is canon but she just fucking runs places and does all sorts of sporty stuff outside. in addition i think she climbs every surface she thinks is a challenge

- messages the rest of the unit anything that comes into her head (and starts very silly, theoretical scenarios). "if you had three lives what would you do" "i found a bug. look at it its huge look look" "guys would you love me if i was a worm"

🎧 Maho Akashi (she/they)

- listens to and makes a lot of music as a hobby, which is canon. however. i also like to think she listens to breakcore/hyperpop/nonsense noise music occasionally either for shits and giggles or to reset her brain in the event of artblock

- is weirdly up to date on memes, although they don't always consent to be. rizz ohio sigma skibidis just get thrown on their twitter feed whenever they check it for whatever news is out

- watches childhood shows for nostalgia's sake. or watches breaking bad

- does a thing where if she's thinking too hard she will get up, sit down, forget that she's sat down, get up again, pace, go into the bathroom, get in the tub, pace, get out, go to the kitchen, cut an onion, go to the living room, sit on the floor... this looks cooler in her head.

🎀 Muni Ohnaruto (they/them)

- is chronically online, so obviously doom scrolls for hours

- canonically they make and post art online. uncanonically they do drawing streams too, where chat decides what they do on their drawing break times. it gets cursed real fast

- reads fanfiction on ao3 and makes points to themself in their notes whenever something is out of character (maybe every two sentences). accidentally got rei into writing one once

- makes small visual novels sometimes, and they always come up with plots that are insanely intricate even though they've only written like. one paragraph in the game itself

🎹 Rei Togetsu (she/her)

- LOVED barbie princess charm school as a kid, so if she's bored enough, she will start reciting scenes from it or imagine what she'd be like if she was in there

- attempted to write fanfiction once. death toll in the millions but she had a lot of fun and still writes them today

- takes those "am i gay?" quizzes even though she knows that she is, in fact, bisexual. spends a lot of time on uquiz. this one's for me more than anything

- watches videos of people reading/reacting to stuff from queer (especially trans) memes subreddits. if she was real she could be a onetopic fan i'm so serious

[cyborg-hydra-girl-thing]

I love Warframe, so much.

The super fluid, only touch the ground to start another parkour sequence, the floor is lava, bouncing off walls and flying across rooms and down hallways style of movement.

The >utterly overwhelming< number of weapons available. Primaries range from bows (Paris, Dread) to rocket launchers (ogris) grenade launchers (penta, tonkor), a handheld laser cannon (opticor), spicy bows (Lenz and Bramma are both rocket launchers cosplaying as bows), an 18th century naval cannon (zarr), machine guns with a 200 round magazine (soma prime) and machine guns that get more accurate the longer you fire (Tenora my beloved), innately suppressed smg (baza). You want a chaining lightning gun that will kill the guy you’re aiming at, and the next two rooms of people via daisy chains? Amprex. if you need a tactical weapon for grouping enemies the Mutalist cernos shoots an arrow full of grabby tentacles that brings enemies together for group hugs. Do you need a rifle to hunt cthulu T-Rexes (eidolons)? Rubico (Prime) or, my favorite, Kuva Chakkhurr - a black powder musket that shoots moderately slow projectiles, high skill high reward, you land a shot, it’s gonna feel it. Here’s a goody - Tigris (Prime) - it’s a double barreled shotgun, with a duplex trigger - you squeeze the trigger, it fires one round, you release the trigger, it fires the second! really interesting to play with, though with the changes to shotgun status a few years ago it’s no longer the powerhouse it was, though quite potent. Phenmor is also one of my favorites, a precision semi auto rifle, land a couple headshots to charge it, and it evolves into an archgun (gun for mecha or exosuits, bigger, and badder) that’s basically a minigun. Corinth (prime) is cool, primary fire is crit based shotgun, alt fire shoots an air burst grenade you can manually detonate over enemies heads (prime version, regular corinth is locked at 20m detonation). Kohm is an auto shotgun that spoils up like a minigun, the higher the spool the more pellets it shoots, very ammo hungry, but man if it isn’t satisfying to point down a hallway and watch it fill with red mist. Astilla is a shotgun that shoots glass slugs that explode on impact. Arcs Plasmor shoots solid walls of energy. like straight up, point down hallway, and you shoot a bright blue (ur energy color) brick wall of plasma. you can’t miss. Simulor is a gun that shoots miniature black holes. Trumna charges it’s alt fire with the literal souls of the enemies you kill. Shedu and Bubonico are the weapon arm cannons of sentient (enemy robot faction) that we ripped off and stole.

secondaries are have a bit less variety, but we’ve still got oodles of goodies

Pandero, a pocket sniper rifle, this lil handcannon is hella accurate for reaching out to touch someone, and alt fire dumps the entire magazine in an automatic burst. Laetum is the cooler pandero, land a few headshots and it evolves into an automatic assault rifle. Lex (Prime) was my starchart clearing gun, back in the day. space deagle. Nukor (and it’s cooler older sister Kuva Nukor (Kukor)) are similar to the amprex in that they chain to enemies, however they also have the quirk of having the highest critical damage in the game, with the lowest critical chance. (there’s shenanigans you can do to force them to crit, making them devestating). Pyrana (Prime) is an auto shotgun, it’s got high spread and high rate of fire, but get in their face and drop mag and see the magic. Zakti (Prime) shoots small needles that explode in clouds of aoe gas after a moment, really good for priming status effects and swapping to melee or primary to take advantage of. Euphona Prime - look, i love it, it’s not great, you gotta build it exclusively for the slug firemode or for the shotgun fire mode. it’s really cool, you should try it if you can, but it’s solidly just okay. Sepulcrum feeds on the souls of its victims to power its alt fire, and it’s just a massive beefy fuckin pistol straight out of 40K. Tenet Spirex force procs impact, and with the hemorrhage mod you can guarantee you turn some of those impact procs into bleed procs for DOT damage. Athodai is straight up like retro sci-fi laser pistol, it shoots beams, and alt fire has a big burst of energy aoe in front of you. Twin Kohmak are like the kohm, but smaller, and akimbo, for pocket dakka. Twin Grakata MOAR DAKKA. A beloved meme gun in the warframe community. just two fuckin bullet hoses that will eat your ammo faster than you can find it. truly one of the guns of all time, and a joy to fire.

and don’t think for a moment i’m going to forget about melees lmao.

we got Nikanas (space katana - nikana (prime) , skiajati ), we got greatswords(Gram (prime), Galatine (prime)), we got throwing glaives(Glaive(prime) Xoris), we got gun blades (like think those bizarre renaissance era swords with guns built into the hilts? got it? yeah, those, but space-y. redeemer (prime), sarpa), we have claws (venka) , we have sword & board (silva & aegis) scythes (reaper prime), hammers (heliocor, jat kittag), dual blades up the wazoo, single daggers, dual daggers, fist weapons, fist and feet weapons, war fans (quassus, arum spinosa), staves (Bo, pupacyst), tonfa (kronen), a gigantic saw (ghoulsaw), rapiers (endura, ), blade & whips (atterax, lacera)

[homemakinghippie]

Things on My Crunchy Mom Baby Registry

Crib- I was going to do a bassinet and then transition to a floor bed when he got too big, then I thought we'd bedshare. Now we've decided to do a sidecar crib where we set it up right next to our bed with no rail between us so I can reach him.

Bottle Nipples- We're going to use mason jars as bottles so I'm just getting nipples. There are a few brands that fit regular mouth mason jars. He'll only get maybe one bottle a day so my husband can have that time with him. He'll be mostly exclusively breast fed so I'm only getting a few.

Manual breast pumps- Like I said I'll be mostly feeding him "from the tap" 😂 but I want to get a Haakaa and Boon Trove to catch letdown on the side he doesn't nurse and build my stash that way so meyhusband can do feedings. They're also good for helping with clogged ducts and whatnot so there's that too.

Silicone pouches- Store bought baby food and applesauce pouches have microplastics since they're generally pasteurized in the pouch. I don't plan on doing purees, but applesauce is an easy snack on the go I still eat as an adult 😂

Cloth diaper inserts- I plan to cloth diaper so my mom is actually sewing me all of my diapers, but I told her I'd take care of buying inserts since 30 diapers is a lot lol. I plan on doing a mix of pockets and covers so I'm getting flats and prefolds mostly.

Cloth wipes- To go with the cloth diapers I'm going to try cloth wipes. I figure it shouldn't be much more laundry and they can be used as cleaning rags in like 10 or so years when I'm done having kids (or saved for them to use).

Wet bags- These are for the diapers and wipes until wash day. I might get a hamper or something to put it in like you do with trash bags and bins, but I also might just have a bag sitting 😂.

Diaper sprayer- I'm not convinced I need this, but I've heard it makes spraying 💩 off diapers easier.

SO. MANY. BOOKS.- My mom is a librarian and reading is just really important to my husband and I so the majority of my registry is books 😂. Most of them are physical books, but I do have a Yoto player and some cards to go with it. A Yoto player is basically an audiobook machine, and the one I'm getting works as a clock as well.

Baby wraps/carriers- I plan to baby wear pretty much all day so I have lots of carrier types so I can have him with me all the time. I plan to contact nap and I don't want to be forced to lay down with him lol.

Sleep sacks- It can get pretty cold where I live and my husband likes to keep the house cooler anyway, so since he can't have a blanket I'll have these.

Adjustable high chair- Dangling feet can mess with their hips so I'm making sure to get a high chair that lets me adjust where the foot rest is so his feet are flat on it.

Car seat with a high rear facing limit- It's best to wait until they max out their car seat's rear facing limits to switch them so I'm getting one that goes up to 50lbs.

Washable play mat- For diaper changes, tummy time, and sensory bins when he's older. The one I'm getting also makes a great picnic blanket.

That's pretty much it besides a few teethers, clothes, and bath/health items. I could change my mind and decide other things are worth it later, but this is all I feel is necessary right now.

Things I'm NOT putting on my registry coming soon 🥰.

[mademoiselle-red]

describe to me the taste of strawberries and cream

I’m seeing people rail against AI writing (again) on my Twitter feed this morning and I think the problem is that AI users are treating AI text generators like a writer / editor rather than a fancy thesaurus, which is how I use it.

I struggle with scenic descriptions.

What does strawberry taste like when you consume it on a summer day in an English meadow? I can’t think of enough adjectives and plant names off the top of my head to describe that scene. All I know is that there is some platonic ideal of this scene that has probably been described to death in the pages of travel magazines and English literature but I am blanking out. So I go into chatGPT and I ask it: “describe to me in 100 words an English meadow on a summer day” and it spits out two sentences overflowing with adjectives. And not just adjectives! Plant names! Flower names! Weather descriptions! I then Google any plants I don’t recognize, because I am not familiar with the fauna of England, and chatGPT has a tendency to hallucinate, and then choose a few to work into my own description of a summer picnic in an English meadow.

And now, the strawberries. I ask chatGPT, “describe the taste of strawberries and cream”, and it reminds me that the word “tart” exists, and throw out some common imagery for cream that I’d forgotten in the recesses of high school creative writing, over a decade ago. I take the suggested descriptions and work them into my own sentence. The thesaurus only gives synonyms if you type in “strawberry”, “sweet”, and “sour”. But chatGPT is a machine for association. It tells you what others have associated with the words “strawberry” and “taste”.

I no longer remember the taste of strawberries on a hot summer day, picked ripe off the bush. I might of had some once or twice ever. The strawberries I buy in my North American grocery stores were picked in South America, still unripe, sour, with a bland texture. They ripened in the cooler, on their long journey in a container ship, and by the time I come across them in the grocery aisle, they’ve only got 3 days shelf life left. They are red and ripe, and remind of the strawberries I’d read about in food & travel magazines and literature whose titles and authors I no longer recall. But when I bite into them, they are sour and bland.

But I want the characters in my fic to have the platonic ideal of the summer strawberry. The ones plucked from local farms in June, the ones consumed with cream on idyllic picnics in grassy meadows with gentle winds. The ones that only exist, for me, in books and articles long forgotten. And so I ask chatGPT, “describe to me the taste of strawberries and cream”, and it tells me about long forgotten flavors, and reminds me of words that have passed from my active memory, dusty from lack of use.