#faking with benefits
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Story: 5 out of 5 Smut: 4 out of 5
So originally, I was gonna rate this four stars, but after a few chapters I was fully invested. A “why choose”, fake dating, friends to lovers? Yeah, I knew this was gonna be a rollercoaster. And boy, I was NOT disappointed.
There’s the ex-rugby player who says the infamous “don’t fall in love with me” line, the sweet “boy next door” who’s secretly been in love with her for YEARS, and then the ex-teacher who’s ten years older than her. It shouldn’t work and for a few chapters everyone’s worst fears come to pass, but this foursome pulls themselves together to talk everything out.
Faking with Benefits is filled with humor, spice, and DRAMA! Seriously, don’t let the cover fool you. The spice is.. well, you’ll see.
* Wow. I totally don’t blame Layla’s date for bailing. lol. Too strong, girl. Too strong for a first date.
* Hottie Zach to the rescue 😍
* Zach and his pet names are kinda swoon-worthy, ngl.
* Lol she’s drunk and hitting on her old teacher. Nice.
* Oohhh. I was wondering why “sweet” Josh seemed kind of dick-ish to Layla when she drunkenly stated she’d pay them for relationship advice. He loves her.
* Aww. Luke doesn’t wanna fake date his ex-student. I like that he has boundaries, but I’m excited for those to vanish. He should totally take Layla on as his date to the wedding his ex keeps inviting him to 😂
* Goddamn. She’s so bad at dating 😬
* Oh la la. Layla’s got a sharing kink 😏
* Those kisses… 🥵 wtf haha. 6/10.
* Luke is starting to hurt MY feelings lol.
* Oh wow. Josh really went in while Zack and Layla were kissing. He found her weakness and totally doesn’t know 😂
* Oohhh. She bold now. She wants both of them to fuck her for practice 👀 Luke is gonna fly off the fuckin handle if he walks out and sees them.
* Goddamn. Josh CAN EAT 🤭
* And Zack… that dude really took her to pound town. Along with Josh. Those two would ruin me.
* Oh no. Finding out Zack had an ex who died when they were eighteen is so sad 😭
* C’mon, Luke. Just make a move, for fuck’s sake!
* Ugh. Luke and Layla’s outing was going so good! And then Donny, an ex-something, had to go and ruin it. Fuck that dude.
* I want Josh and Layla together so bad! And with Zack and Luke, but Josh! Oh my goodness.
* Luke finally snapped! Thank god haha.
* Goddamn. Luke is very… dominant. I did not expect this 😏
* “Okay, babe. I don’t know how strong the human head is, and I don’t think it matters. There’s no weight capacity. Just sit on his face, and if he dies, he dies.” // “Damn straight. Bury him alive. Lucky guy.”
* Ayyyy. She’s at the ex-wife’s wedding with the ex-husband. Be petty!!
* She has to move to America if everything with this collaboration works out? 😬 None of the boys are happy. They all caught feelings but no one wants to fess up.
* Fuckkkk. She leaves in a week. Just reluctantly says they’ll end their experiment before she has to leave and Zack is not happy. The one who didn’t want her to fall in love with him doesn’t want her to leave. Damn.
* Goddammit, Zack.
* Well this wedding reception is an absolute shit show. Josh desperately wants to tell Layla he loves her, Zack is intending to break things off, and Luke’s es-wife is telling him that Layla is a whore. wtf.
* Wow. Luke and Zack fucked up. Poor Josh. How’s that gonna go for him?
* The fucking drama. I can’t. My heart hurts.
* Well I’m happy they came to their senses, but fuck. Zack and Luke were kind of harsh. Zack especially. I don’t want her to give in and forgive, but I know she will.
* Oh wow. She lost the collaboration with the designer in New York because of the podcast. This sucks.
* So after crying and groveling, all is well!
* And now she’s taking them has her dates to the high school reunion. Oh fuck 😂
* Damn. Drama at the high school reunion. I totally saw that coming.
* Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god. They GOT MARRIED!
#booktok book review#book review#faking with benefits#lily gold#romance#reverse harem#why choose#reverse harem romance#why choose romance#layla thompson#zack harding#josh tran#luke martins
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Book Review: Faking with Benefits by Lily Gold
WANTED: Three fake boyfriends. Must be tall, ripped — and willing to teach me how to kiss.
My name is Layla Thompson, and I am undateable. Seriously. I’m twenty-eight and I’ve never had a boyfriend. And with my thirties rapidly approaching, I’m starting to lose patience.
Lucky for me, I have three overprotective best friends who are all-too-eager to help hone my dating skills. There’s Zack, the huge rugby player with the cheeky grin and rippling biceps. Josh, the boy-next-door with the sculpted jaw and calculating stare. And Luke, the silver-haired divorcee… who also happens to be my old professor.
After a bad date leaves me crying on their shoulders, the three men are determined to help me find a guy. Together, they agree to be my ‘practice boyfriends’, and come up with a lesson plan packed with fake dates, make out sessions, and classes on flirty texting. In return, I just have to make an appearance on their relationship advice podcast once a week. Easy.
But as my lessons become more and more intense, we soon find ourselves getting in too deep. Every stomach-fluttering touch lingers a little too long, and every molten kiss ends in fireworks. It’s not long before I realise that their friendship isn’t enough for me anymore. I want more.
The guys have been teaching me how to get a boyfriend, and now it’s time I put their lessons to the test.
Three times over.
Read my full review below the cut.
I am obsessed with this book! Perhaps it is because I relate to Layla about needing to be in control of every aspect of my life, needing to stick with my plans, even the list making it’s just on point! Also, Zack, Luke, and Josh being emotionally constipated men felt like a reflection of what kind of guys I mostly attract… I feel seen and I don’t know if I like it.
The smut on this is also the best among the Lily Gold books I read. And I do not mind a sequel. I just want to see more from these characters.
Aside from swooning and giggling, I also cried my eyes out. The guys should have groveled like hell, but, I was not in the mood to read a heavily angsty novel so I still find it okay.
Final thoughts: If you love a good romcom, this one’s for you. If you love perfectionist women with chaotic men, this one’s for you.
GoodReads | Storygraph | Instagram
#book review#faking with benefits#author: lily gold#reverse harem#whychoose#contemporary romance#rating: 4.75/5 stars#spice level: 5/5#harem size: small (3-4)
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Going to start posting my fancasts more often
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This post except that Danny and Jason don't stop fake dating. It is very convenient for the both of them actually.
Danny gets to respond to his parents whenever they ask about his boyfriend or whenever they make surprise visits to Gotham for one reason or another.
Jason gets to play the 'sorry I'm taken' card as both Red Hood and Jason Todd. He also gets to use the couple's discount whenever it's available, and if he gets gifts from his girls in Crime Alley for his mysterious boyfriend, its not like Danny would complain.
Again, they hold no romantic interest in the other at all, entirely platonic those two are.
The batfam doesn't know that, though. Nor does anyone else but put an emphasis on them, after the whole 'Jason Todd is Red Hood' reveal goes down the batfam is interested in Jason's supposed boyfriend.
Danny just cannot believe his parents were right about Jason being a crime lord and Jason? Yea he's definity going to have to buy more ice cream to make up for it.
On the other hand, Jason just can't believe Danny took it that well. Considering he got the bomb dropped on him by Nightwing after he (and others) broke into their apartment. On second thought, he's met the guy's parents and they immediately saw through his secret identity so...
#dc x dp#dp x dc#dpxdc#dp x dc crossover#dcxdp#dc x dp crossover#Danny and Jason keep fake dating for benefits#completely platonic between them though#the batfam doesn't know that though#and basically everyone in Gotha but SHHHHHH
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Ungodly Hour (1)
That time you - a broke college student - were willing to do just about anything for a hulu account after your brother kicks you off of his - (and Jungkook would do anything to have you).
Series Masterlist
Word count: 1.687
Warning: idk yall, i was bored, smut, college au, jungkook is thirsty, reader is somewhat slutty but with good reasons, dirty talking, swallowing, oral (m receiving), unprotected sex, riding, cumming,
Your mouth wrapped around the tip of Jungkook’s cock, twirling the head in your mouth. You only slightly (maybe more than you want to admit) the way the salty pre-cum drips into your mouth as you suck. Even better were his moans - so soft and velvety; melodic.
if anyone was to blame it had to be your brother - he was the nuisance in your life. It was as if he intended on making your life a complete mess.
You were a good person, daughter and sister. You did what you had to do - attend classes everyday. You went to work and then home without a care. You worked at a grocery store part time and made enough to pay your half of the rent. Sure, with the price of groceries now you couldn’t be bothered to buy any. But that’s where your parents came in. You craved independence from them but only for privacy. You made sure you were there every night for dinner and sometimes if you had time, breakfast in the mornings.
Your brother was just upset that you accidentally bought an add-on on his hulu account - but how else were you supposed to watch what you wanted if he was too cheap to pay for anything further? It was bad enough you had to sit through 2 minute ads - it was the least he could do.
This is how you now found yourself sucking Jungkook off - the same man you had been dodging ever since the pair of you met. He gave off fuck boy vibes and the last thing you needed was that in your life - until you actually did need Jungkook. The irony.
Jungkook watches with hooded eyes at the beautiful sight of you. You had now grasped the length of his cock and began to pump him, focusing more on the tip of his head. He was glad the two of you were alone - seeing as you didn’t even have the decency to take him to your room and insisted on doing this on the couch. But Jungkook wasn’t a picky person - he prayed for times such as this. You were the play hard to get type and one thing he enjoyed was the chase.
Jungkook places a hand on the back of your head and thrusts lighty into your mouth, groaning as he does so. You allowed it. You laid your tongue flat, eyes flickering up to watch his expression. Satisfaction bubbled deep inside of you at the sight of his lust-filled expression. Dark hooded eyes, gasping lips.
“I waited, fuck…so long for this.” Jungkook groans, pumping inside of your mouth a little faster. His thumb caresses your cheek. “I told you that I’d have you one day, didn’t I?” he says smugly.
You groan a response, throat vibrating against his cock. That bastard, you thought. Jungkook did - he told you that one day your “play hard to get” act would crumble and when it did, he’d be there. But this couldn’t count - right? You were doing this for the greater good, after all. You had shows to watch and Jungkook just so happened to be the one that had a premium account.
You feel the tip of Jungkook��s cock tickling the back of your throat, testing to see how far you’d let him go. There’s a trail of saliva dripping from the corner of your lips and it drips slowly down your chin. Your mouth was heavy - wet and warm and inviting. You were determined to make him cum and he was determined to do just that.
Jungkook’s hand grips your hair - you moan at the sensation. He pumps just a little faster, your slurps and gagging hitting his ears and he moans at just how filthy you were for him.
“I’m about to cum.” Jungkook groans. His free hand wipes away a lone tear that releases from your eye. “You okay?” he asks, slowing his thrusts.
Your response was to bring him deeper into your mouth, blinking up at him. You slap his thigh harshly and that was all the permission he needed to fuck your throat. He shudders, feeling his toes curl. It didn’t help that your teary eyes watched his every move - and Jungkook couldn’t take his eyes off of you. Even now while he took control, you remain just as stubborn; challenging him. “F-Fuck…” Jungkook grunts. “W-Where do I cum?”
Jungkook wants to slap himself, forgetting that you can’t exactly respond to him. But he’s unsure if cumming inside of your mouth would be too intimate - but then again, you could always spit it out and he would be fine with that.
You gag, feeling your throat swell with the warm, salty substance. You inhale through your nose and moan. “L-Let me find-” Jungkook watches as you swallow and lick your lips - he feels his cheeks redden and his heart thump.
You wipe your eyes of the pathetic tears and hum. “Don’t get big headed.” you hiss.
Jungkook smirks and bats his eyelashes. “Never.” he says. “I already made you a profile on my hulu account.”
You watch as Jungkook takes out his phone to show you the account and like state, he did make you your own profile. You snort at the name - stargirl. “I’ll text you the information to get into it.”
You place your hands onto his thighs. Your eyes lower to his cock - it wasn’t completely erect, but it wasn’t softening, either.
“I was told I would get peacock and hbo max.” you say to him. You didn’t want to tell him that you were wet and wanted to ride him, his head was already big enough.
“I have hbo max as an add on with hulu.” Jungkook responds, eyes darkening at the thought of feeling you.
“Hm. That’s too bad.” you tilt your head. “I wanted to ride you.”
“I can add disney.” Jungkook responds far too quickly, mentally cursing at how desperate he appeared.
Smirking, you nod your head. “Deal.”
Jungkook’s eyes are wide when you lift from your knees and kick off your shorts, panties flying with them. He’s erect once more at the sight of your slick trailing down your thighs. Your thighs trap him beneath you as you center yourself on him. “I’m not on any birth control.”
Jungkook gulps. His hands place themselves firmly on your hips. “I can pull out.” he nods. “Unless you want another streaming service as payment for me cumming inside of you.” he jokes - unless…
Jungkook smirks at you and you could only glare. You sit down on him completely and wipe the smirk from his lips. Your hands grip his shoulders as you begin to pound on him. It doesn’t take time for the entire sitting room is filled with your moans mixed with Jungkooks as well as skin slapping.
“You look like you’re enjoying yourself.” Jungkook murmurs, inching closer to capture your lips with his own. You never said anything against kissing is his defense.
You deepen the kiss, grinding against him. “Says the man who hasn’t stopped moaning since we started.”
Jungkook chuckles and does just that. His hands trail from your hips, to your thighs and upwards towards your breast. He grips both of your clothed breasts into his palms. “Pussy feels so good, I can’t help myself.”
You swallow your own moan back. You can’t let him know his words turn you on - he would never let you live it down. It’s bad enough you were fucking him for streaming services.
You shifted yourself, your feet firmly against the couch. You looked into his eyes as you began to bounce on him once more, satisfied that the man below you was a moaning mess - and broke eye contact first. His eyes begin to roll at the new found pleasure.
You decided that you wouldn’t hide your own pleasure anymore. Jungkook was big and this position only meant that his cock was hitting the right spot each time.
“I know it feels good, baby.” Jungkook’s voice brings you back to reality - and so does his thumb upon your clit. His thumb rubs hastily on it, enjoying the way your pussy tightens around his cock.
“It does.” Maybe you were growing weak - but only because it did feel good. That, and the way Jungkook’s voice grows deeper and more sultry as he speaks is an added turn on.
“What happened to the playing hard to get girl I know?” Jungkook’s now thrusting upwards inside of you to meet you halfway.
You clench around him. “Fuck you.” you murmur.
“I intend to.” Jungkook manages to laugh, his thumb leaving your clit to hook beneath your thighs. He continues where you left off, stamina unmatched. He pounds into you with such need - as if this was what he had been waiting for for who knows how long.
Your arms wrap around his neck and allow him the control - just this once. Jungkook’s reveling in your submission, murmuring dirty words in your ears as he fucks you. You were so wet - slick gripping out of you and onto his thighs - that he knew neither of you would last long.
You bite your lip when you feel Jungkook’s hands on your ass. He squeezes it with such need, moaning beautifully in your ears as his thrusts turn sloppy. “Where do I cum?” he asks suddenly.
“Anywhere.” was your response.
Jungkook took your lack of direction as a sign. His fingers lean down from your ass to find your clit once more. He toys with it as he thrusts, hellbent on making sure you cum right along with him. He wasn’t going to last - not with the way you were squeezing his cock right now.
“S-Shit!” you hiss, feeling yourself come undone right as Jungkook pulls out of you, cum leaking on your ass.
Jungkook leans against the couch and pants. There was no way he was going to leave you alone after this - but that’s okay because he knows you’ll close up once more and play that game you’ve been playing. Jungkook loved the chase and deep down, so do you.
Series Masterlist
#bts college au#college au#bangtanwritershq#bts smut#btsmasterlist2022#btswritersclub#bangtan smut#jungkook x reader#jungkook smut#fake tweets#explicit-tae#bangtanwriters net#btswriterscollective#btswritingcafe#jungkook college au#ungodly hour#jungkook friends with benefits#bts fwb
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Dp x dc prompt
So this starts with Danny becoming the ghost king on his 18th birthday and almost immediately every power-hungry ghost in existence starts proposing to him. At first he just ignores it but after the 10th time someone tries to kidnap him to marry him Greek god style, he’s fucking sick of it and goes to Clockwork for help.
He’s not much help. The only way for other people to stop trying to marry him is if he’s already married. What’s more, because he’s the king of the infinite realms, it has to be someone that’s considered a citizen of the Infinite Realms. (Like he can marry someone that’s still alive but they wouldn’t count and people will just keep trying to marry him) CW also warns him that people will try and kill anyone he marries if they can so a living person isn’t really ideal. The only bit of real helpfulness he does provide is a list of non-evil non-power-hungry citizens so he can have an easier time finding someone.
So Danny takes the list and starts crossing of names (like Johnny, even tho the guy won’t abuse the power of being the ghost princess, kitty would kill Danny for good this time) when he comes across the perfect candidate.
Jason Todd (Robin/Red Hood)
He’s been to Gotham before, knows the Robins all do good work and knows the Red Hood is already a good and fair ruler of his criminal underground. Plus the guy could definitely fight off any ghost trying to kill him even without the power boost and some helpful weapons Danny would give him if he agrees. Plus he has the perfect bargaining chip to get the guy to help by offering to fix the corrupted ectoplasm in him (not that he wasn’t gonna do that anyway when he had the time to but Hood didn’t need to know that)
So Danny hops over to Gotham and after quickly getting permission from Lady Gotham (she’s very protective of her Knights) heads over to crime ally and pitches the idea to Red Hood.
Which basically goes like-
Danny: so I give u, the title of prince, access to the Infinite Realms whenever u wish, a sweet private wing in my castle, any of the op ghost weapons in the castles armoury and a fix for ur rage problems and u marry me so I stop getting people trying to propose to me in increasingly more annoying ways :)
Jason, a literature geek with a secret desire to be the protagonist in a shitty YA romance: u had me at Prince
So the two of then jump over to the Infinite Realms to get married thinking it’ll take 30 minutes top only to learn that CW left out that a Royal wedding has to take at minimum a week otherwise no one will consider the Marriage valid. So the two, not backing out at this point, join in on the week of parties and celebrations without putting much more thought into it.
Meanwhile back in Gotham, after not having Red Hood check in after his patrol, Oracle searches CCTV and finds Jason having a conversation with a figure that is glitching out the camera to much to identify them, then the figure seemingly grabs Jason and drags him into a portal and the two of them disappear.
So obviously the Batfam comes to the conclusion that Jason was kidnapped by some sort of magical being and calls in John. He identify the magic as that of the ghost king’s and has been hearing that the king had been looking for a bride so comes to the conclusion that Jason has been kidnapped Persephone style to be be married and is under the (wrong) conclusion that it will mean Jason can’t leave the realm of the death after.
And so the Batfam + Constantine start planing to crash a wedding.
#dp x dc#danny fenton#jason todd#jason x danny#dead on main#batfam#Danny and Jason r basically Hades and Persephone#at least in the Batfam a POV#jason is having the time of his life#fake dating#kinda???#more like marriage for tax benefits
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~~~~~~~
“Friends with benefits”
#oblivious idiots#perfect fic idea: friends with benefits#can totally see it#ghostsoap#call of duty#john soap mactavish#simon ghost riley#fake image#fake text#cod modern warfare#ghost mw2#simon riley#cod meme#incorrect cod quotes
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the librarians episode where they try to go to human resources but end up in a labyrinth is so real. companies WILL make you fight the minotaur instead of letting you go to hr.
#the time i needed help with benefits and my manager told me there was no general hr number i could call and also i wasn't eligible....#well. i AM eligible and there IS a number i just had to spend an hour navigating the poorly designed intranet site to find it#ALSO. he told me the 401k website listed on the info board was fake..... it isn't.#the librarians
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Leon being a veteran is actually so fucking sad to me. In a "you know Leon isn't actually allowed to say he used to be a soldier under Krauser because of red tape/secrecy" way... and so Leon probably also has never personally identified as a soldier. He never wanted to be. He was a cop. He was forced into the army, forced to join Krauser’s team. And then, when the team was wiped out (and then Krauser "died") the government looked at Leon (who they had just spent years training him as this special operations soldier) goes "okay, nevermind about that." And yoinks him into some secret, vague government agent position.
The government never wanted Leon to be a solider, either. It was just a means to an end. No way does the government consider Leon a soldier, either (you know Leon does not have any real fucking paperwork to get any kind of benefits through the VA or anything. He does not have a military ID, he doesn't fucking exist).
Even if Leon felt like he earned his veteran status... he doesn't have any way to prove it.
#also you know the government is expecting Leon to die before he retires#no way is the government going to give LEON S KENNEDY BENEFITS????#are you crazy?#the government has always wanted to chew him up and spit him out when he is done being useful to him#anyways... I need a worn out/fed up Leon breaking away from the government and going AWOL permanently#you know what would be funny as shit???#if Chris via the BSAA (or whatever organization Chris will make after burning the BSAA/blue umbrella to the ground after Re8...#as Chris and Jill deserve to do!!!) french foreign legion it for Leon somehow#ask Leon to “serve” and then give him a completely new identity#and the US government cannot “get Leon back legally” because legally Leon S Kennedy died in RC and all of Leon's documents#since then have been faked#Leon doesn’t exist to the US government (not the original Leon S Kennedy)#that would be so fucking funny#espscially if Chris turns around and retires Leon with full benefits after Leon barely does any real work#because Chris will NOT stand by and let Leon be put out to dry/work until he dies#re stuff#leon kennedy#leon s kennedy#resident evil#reaidsnt evil 2#reaident evil 4#resident evil 2 remake#reaident evil 4 remake#resident evil 6
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okay so ive decided im not going to do a while 'fake tweets' post for every episode, maximum 3 tweets per episode unless its an episode that has a lot going on, or just one i really like/think twitter would have a lot to say about.
for anyone confused which tweet is for which episode, let me explain :)
image 1: fishy doubloon caper
images 2, 3, and 4: opera in the outback caper
images 5 and 6: chasing paper caper
images 7 and 8: lucky cat caper
images 9 and 10: french connection caper
which means season 1 is done!! cant wait for season 2 :)
#carmen sandiego#carmen sandiego netflix#carmen sandiego 2019#carmen sandiego twitter au#twitter au#fake tweets#twitter#social media#social media au#unreality#carmen sandiego unreality#tweets#ok so ivy doesnt use humor to cope in stressful situations. after the stress has passed and shes safe? yes#but not during the danger. thats what ZACK does. however zack had a concussion at the time and was unable to make the joke#so ivy had to do it for him. besides shes more into dark humor than he is and that joke def classifies as dark humor#player usually likes a bit of dark humor as well but in this situation it was not appropriate#ivy apologised for the joke later by sending him money for sweets dwdw. also carmen laughed at the joke but then she got lectured by player#via a meme. of course. but she got lectured (ivy did too lol)#anyway they would all be menaces on twitter.#also julia is seething in jealousy after seeing the 'frenemies with benefits' tweet about carmen bc back OFF paperstar that is her lady#i promise more is to come. especially since i quite enjoyed season 2#not sure if ill do anything for the need for speed caper bc ive never actually watched it fully but i will try. for the people#anyway#enjoy the burnt food#<3
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something's been bothering me about this pic for a while and i figured out why, it’s because they gave this man the audacity to smirk despite him having zero game
#lucanis dellamorte#dav#dragon age the veilguard#da stuff#they were betting on him benefiting from the stereotype zevran set but he can't even deliver. fake antivan crow#although two out of three important male crows are anxious messes. i now think zevran is an outlier#yeah yeah maybe he's just really happy about killing people. let me have my joke
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I am once again thinking about how odysseus who witnessed the horrors that the captured women went through (one of his main duties in the iliad was taking the women back home and making sure they were as comfortable as possible and safe because he was the only one trusted not to violate them further due to his devotion to penelope. And in the odyssey part of the reason circe sent him to the underworld was so that he'd have to listen to all these women's stories (before he could talk to the prophet) ). Who was one of the few that saw women as people and respected their space and opinions. And was then put in those exact same situations. I don't have the motivation right now to do a full literary analysis of this (I'll site the sources too) but oh man one day I'm going to write a full essay on this.
#The odyssey#iliad#Odysseus#Tw: rape#Tw: sex slaves#Tw: camp slaves#Tw: That one time Calypso kept odysseus as a sex slave for 7 years#circe#Something about the inherent trauma of witnessing how your friends treat women#Watching them keep sex slaves#Then having to bring these girls home hearing about their stories seeing the aftermath#Then living in a situation where you have to let a powerful witch use you as she pleases half in payment for lives/food/medicine#Half because she has the equivalent of a gun to your best friends head and if you don't keep her happy then youre all dead#And then that witch sends you on a quest to the underworld where granted you'll benefit too but first#You have to listen to every single captured women from the Trojan war that you didn't Shepard home tell you their stories#Tell you that you're a horrible person while you are living in a disturbingly similar situation#And then later finding yourself trapped as a sex slave for seven years to an immortal nymph#And then being labeled as a horrible cheater for the rest of history#And none of this well historically everybody cheated or it's up to interpretation bullshit#Because it fucking isn't and granted a lot of abridged versions skip this shit#But if you read the full original stories and still think odysseus cheated then you just have an issue with men being victims#Or weren't paying attention i guess#Where's that meme where's it like the text was up to interpretation cut to the text where it very bluntly states what's happening#And I'm not saying odysseus was a good person or that he didn't have slaves because he did. And he wasnt#But first off nobody deserves to suffer that violation#Second they weren't sex slaves they were all nurses/maids/spys and I'm not getting into the ancient culture slavery issues rn#Third there's a lot you can pick to hate odysseus for but cheating/disrespecting women wasn't one of them#They literally invented a new word to describe his and penelopes love and it means to be so in love that you think the exact same way#Also forcing this narrative of odysseus cheating and penelope leaving to be a single girl boss is#Just the fake feminist mindset that stay at home moms are weak and wrong and live awful lives
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This post except that Danny and Jason don't stop fake dating. It is very convenient for the both of them actually.
Danny gets to respond to his parents whenever they ask about his boyfriend or whenever they make surprise visits to Gotham for one reason or another.
Jason gets to play the 'sorry I'm taken' card as both Red Hood and Jason Todd. He also gets to use the couple's discount whenever it's available, and if he gets gifts from his girls in Crime Alley for his mysterious boyfriend, its not like Danny would complain.
Again, they hold no romantic interest in the other at all, entirely platonic those two are.
The batfam doesn't know that, though. Nor does anyone else but put an emphasis on them, after the whole 'Jason Todd is Red Hood' reveal goes down the batfam is interested in Jason's supposed boyfriend.
Danny just cannot believe his parents were right about Jason being a crime lord and Jason? Yea he's definity going to have to buy more ice cream to make up for it.
On the other hand, Jason just can't believe Danny took it that well. Considering he got the bomb dropped on him by Nightwing after he (and others) broke into their apartment. On second thought, he's met the guy's parents and they immediately saw through his secret identity so...
#dc x dp#dp x dc#dpxdc#dp x dc crossover#dcxdp#dc x dp crossover#Danny and Jason keep fake dating for benefits#completely platonic between them though#the batfam doesn't know that though#and basically everyone in Gotha but SHHHHHH
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Ungodly Hour: Day 1
You and Jungkook are together for the whole weekend. All he truly wanted from you was to admit you were his girl - but like always, he had to fuck it out of you. @swga-ficrecs @rrrapmonste-rr @xtrataerrestrial @bangctans @danielle143 @taekritimin123 @thelilbutifulthings @jksjx
Series Masterlist
word count: 3.675
warning: dirty talk, nipple sucking, slight kissing, neck biting, edging, face-slapping, cocky/jealous/possessive/dominant jungkook, bitchy/shit-talking but submissive reader, creampie, crying, begging,
“You cooked this?” your mother is first to ask once she bites into the meat, eyes growing slightly wide. “It tastes amazing.”
Jungkook gives a toothy grin and nods. “I added a secret sauce that my father has taught me.”
You want to roll your eyes at Jungkook.
Dinner was going by smoothly. Around 20 minutes ago, your parents arrived. Your father appeared much the same, nonchalant and just ready to eat. Your mother did most of the talking. Her eyes roamed the apartment with prying eyes. She asked Jungkook and you questions after questions, all of which Jungkook responded to quickly and without hesitation.
“How did you two really meet?” your mother asks after a moment. “I assume it couldn’t have been tweeter.”
You scoff. “No. It was not twitter.”
Jungkook places a hand atop yours and laughs. He wraps his fingers into your own and eyes you. He then brings your hand up to his lips and places a gentle kiss. “We met at the University.” Jungkook nods. “She was so cold to me at first.”
Your mother shakes her head. “Typical of her.”
“I must’ve asked her out a million times. I was shut down each and every time. Right, baby?”
You want to snatch that smirk off of his lips, but you only roll your eyes.
“I think she got tired of my begging and agreed to a date.” Jungkook turns to your mother. “Ever since then, I’ve been attached to her like a lost puppy.”
Your father listens, not interested in speaking, but interested enough to appear apart of the conversation. “I’m glad.” your mother speaks. She takes a sip of her water. “Y/N can be a little mean.”
You knit your brows, but before you can speak Jungkook cackles. “She can!” he agrees.
Oh wow, you think.
“But that’s what I love about her. She’s feisty and stubborn.” Jungkook looks your way, his eyes burning into you. You glance away from them and grunt, feeling hot. “And she always speaks up for me at restaurants when they get my order wrong.”
“That was once.” you quip. “You asked for extra sauce…”
“I did.” Jungkook nods. “I thought she was going to rip someone’s head off.” he tells your mother jokingly. “At least I know she cares.”
Jungkook was right - he had won over your mother.
That was expected, however. Your mother was easy to please. Jungkook was the equivalent of tall, dark and handsome. He’s easy to speak with and was such a smooth talker that it even had her swooning. He was affectionate, often kissing your hand or your head - more than usual, but you told yourself he was milking this to the very end.
Now, your father was a different story. He was able to engage the man into conversation and actually hold it, having your fathers full and undivided attention. That is when you realized that Jungkook meant what he said - that even if this fake dating didn’t end with the both of you actually dating, that Jungkook would be there regardless. Your mother was already inviting him to dinner the following week and even hugged him before leaving - before she hugged you.
“I’ll see you two next week?” your mother asks as she’s strolling out the door.
Jungkook wraps you in a tight embrace, his head resting on your shoulder. “You will!” he responds to her, waving curtly. “Y/N tells me about your cooking all the time. I can’t wait!”
You grumble - it was all the time, but you weren’t aware Jungkook was actually listening to your random ramblings. He was slowly winning your mother over that you were sure she would have him for dinner even without you there.
“You think you’re cute?” you push Jungkook off of you once the door is shut.
“Is that the thanks I get for making a good impression?”
You cross your arms. “You know what you were doing complimenting her the entire night.”
Jungkook smirks. “Like mother, like daughter. You both like my praises.” Jungkook’s hands are on you again, bringing you closer to him. “I have to keep myself on top if I’m going to be competing against these boyfriends.”
Your hands are against his chest to push him away. “Ugh, take me home.”
“You aren’t staying the weekend?” Jungkook pouts his lips slightly. “We have to finish binge watching Law & Order.”
“You’re right.” you sigh for a moment. “And here I thought I had a chance to get rid of you.”
“You never can.” Jungkook’s right hand slaps your ass. You yelp, but it was only a gesture to bring you closer to him. He pecks your lips. “Let’s get going. We have the entire weekend ahead of us.”
The night shouldn’t have ended like this. You told yourself that you and Jungkook wouldn’t be entangled together - especially since you were watching Law & Order - there was no way Jungkook could ignore such an amazing series to get his cock wet.
But Jungkook had.
It started with light touching. Jungkook’s bed is soft and it’s easy to be comfortable. He had gave you a shirt to wear - even if you had a weekend's worth of clothes - he insisted it would be best. You were certain he just wanted you in his shirt to appear more domesticated.
Your first mistake was not wearing anything but the shirt and panties. Jungkook’s hands wandered upon your skin, his body dangerously close to yours. His hips would rut against your ass, prying hand going beneath the oversized shirt. “Just one kiss, Y/N. Don’t be like that.” was what he said - and you caved.
Of course it could never be one kiss. One peck led to him begging for more - and more. It led to him flipping you to face him, his hand squeezing the flesh of your ass to bring you closer to him. It continued with you being on top of him, tongues fighting against one another. His hands stayed upon your ass, rubbing gently as you and he kissed.
“We’re missing the show.” you protest, breaking free of the heated kiss.
“We can always go back.” Jungkook eyes you with hooded eyes. “You look so pretty in my shirt.” he murmurs.
“Shut up, simp.” you roll your eyes jokingly.
“I can never compliment my girl without getting called a simp.” Jungkook tsks. His hands rub up your rib back down to your waist to your thighs. “It’s true, though. I wanna wake up with you like this every day.”
“I would have to actually be your girl for that to happen.” you retort. You gently grind against him, lips flashing him a mischievous grin.
“You are my girl.” Jungkook hisses low, hands squeezing your hips to keep you firmly against him. “I got you in my shirt, don’t I?”
Jungkook and his logical comebacks. Damn him.
“I got you to stay with me this weekend, right?” Jungkook continues, his tongue coating his lips with moisture.
“So?”
Jungkook manages to lift himself up without disrupting you. You and he are face to face now, your thighs caging him in between you.
“So that makes you my girl.” Jungkook pecks your lips. “I know you like being called my girl, Y/N. Each time I say it you grind against me a little harder.”
Truly, fuck Jeon Jungkook because damn was he right.
“Exactly.” Jungkook murmurs, and for a second you believe he’s going to say something else - a comment that would indicate just how “down bad” you were for him. But no, Jungkook continues to stare at you.
You shift in his lap and with that, Jungkook blinks. “You’re really pretty.”
You frown, knitting your brows together in an attempt to be annoyed - even if your heart did jolt.
“My pretty girl.” Jungkook continues, his arms embracing you. “Far too stubborn to admit.”
“Is this how you ask out all your girls?” you snort, but feel yourself melting in his warm embrace. “Just demand for them to be with you?”
“There you go, Y/N.” Jungkook chuckles. “You go in that head of yours and start being delusional and fantasize me being with other girls.”
“Excuse me?” Delusional?
“Why are you adamant on me having multiple girls?” Jungkook gently kisses your forehead just because he knows it annoys you - his random acts of affection or kindness in a situation that is deemed “serious”.
You shrug your shoulders. “You fit the fuck boy aesthetic.” was all you say.
Jungkook snorts. “You think I have girls lining up to suck my dick in exchange for streaming services?”
You gasp. “We said we wouldn’t bring that up!” you hiss.
“You’re right, baby. I’m sorry.” Jungkook smiles. “I just don’t see how you think I’m a fuck boy even now. I barked in order to meet your parents. I’m still getting laughed at in the groupchat.”
You suppress your own laughter, only giving Jungkook a grin.
“I basically fund your whole lifestyle. I think that’s far beyond a fuck boy.” Jungkook adds - but not in a way to throw it in your face or to appear as though you need him to.
“A sugar daddy at best.” you shrug, but even you can’t help but laugh at the bewildered look on Jungkook’s face. “You do know you aren’t obligated to buy me things.”
Jungkook rolls his eyes - it was the same song and dance as before. He’d get you something he heard you speak about once a few days prior - you would insist it wasn’t a need, but the sparkle in your eyes was enough for him to keep doing it.
“As my girl…” Jungkook places a kiss at the nape of your neck. “...it’s required of me to.”
“Until you get bored and throw me to the side.” you feel Jungkook’s teeth bite down on your neck.
“You do everything but admit you like me, baby.” Jungkook presses you firmly against him. “I’m beginning to think that’s what you want me to do so you can remain in denial.”
Jungkook’s hands go beneath the large shirt of his you wore. Your skin is so soft and smooth - the both of you shudder.
“You’re okay.” you murmur, biting your lip when you feel both of his hands engulf your breasts.
“Just okay?” Jungkook’s tongue twirls on the spot he bit. “I can have you on your back begging for me in seconds, baby. Nothing about me is ‘just okay’.”
Your play hard to get was not going to last - especially not now. The cocky Jungkook was creeping in, and he knew that your words were nothing but bluffs.
“I’m sure I would be the same way with someone else.”
You couldn’t help it. It was a game for you at times to rile up Jungkook. He was the jealousy and competitive type - he had to prove that he was the best at any and everything he did.
“You want me to fuck you so bad.” Jungkook chuckles, but you can hear the slight irritation in his voice - deep and raspy; ready to prove you wrong. You shudder slightly as goosebumps ride across your skin.
You really did. You were already wet enough, his hands and mouth adding to it. There was nothing like Jungkook fucking your petty words right out of you.
“You do this every time, Y/N.” Jungkook bites your neck harshly and you yelp, squirming. “You love messing with me. It must turn you on seeing me fuck the submission into you.”
You swallow thickly to suppress a moan. “I just give you what you want.” you shrug slightly.
“What do I want?”
“Someone to moan for you no matter if it feels good or not.”
You were playing a dangerous game with Jungkook, but it just brings nothing but excitement through you.
You yelp once more when you feel your hair being yanked. “You’re being a bitch again, baby.” Jungkook murmurs, but even he is amused by your attempts. You can never just tell him that you want him - never tell him that you want him to dominate. Instead, you deny or insinuate the opposite just to give him a reason to prove you wrong.
But Jungkook said it once before, he loved your ‘play hard to get’ game you played with him; when he had you it was much more satisfying.
“Isn’t that what you like about me?” you tease, and even in the dim room - law and order playing ignored in the background - you are beautiful to him, eyes sparkling with mischief.
“Love it.” Jungkook presses his lips firmly onto yours, his tongue sliding past your mouth. It’s quick and he’s rough, but you cannot protest. His hands are gripping your flesh so hard that you feel as though they’d leave a mark.
Jungkook yanks the shirt off of you, tongue instantly finding both of your breasts. Your legs are wrapped around him, his clothed cock pressing firmly against you.
“Why can’t you be normal?” Jungkook’s lips pops from your nipples, his tongue licking it furiously. “A normal girl would just tell me she wants me to be a little rough and not provoke it out of me.”
Jungkook grips both of your breasts into the palm of his hands and brings both of your nipples into his mouth.Your back arches at the warm sensation pooling through you.
“I-I have to tell you how to fuck like a man?”
There was a new sensation when the words left your mouth and hit Jungkook’s ears. It’s a sensation that shoots straight to your core and leaves your cheek stinging.
The room is silent, Jungkook’s eyes wide watching your reaction for a moment. He’s ready to apologize for not thinking before he slaps you, but it’s your moan that draws him back to reality.
“You liked that?” Jungkook murmurs and you nod, biting your lip. Jungkook grunts, his mind wandering just how far you’d let him go.
Jungkook unwraps your legs from around him and removes himself from the bed. He drags you to the edge of it, you yelping at the sudden movement. Jungkook removes your panties and widens your legs. He’s cocky - through the flashing television light, he see’s how wet you are for him.
“Keep your eyes on me.” Jungkook demands.
You swallow, finding it difficult underneath his intense gaze. Jungkook lowers himself, burying his tongue deep within your folds. He forces your legs open each time you threaten to close them. His eyes are locked onto your fluttering ones, watching as you moan and cry for him. You were so beautiful for him - if only you’d allow him to admire your beauty. Oftentimes when he looked your way, you were quick to respond with a witty remark.
“Fuck…” you groan, breaking eye-contact just as he enters his fingers inside of you. You lay your head back and continue to pant.
“You never allow me to treat you nicely.” Jungkook removes his tongue from your clit to spit on it, continuing his pumping. “If you’d let me, I would take good care of you.” Jungkook licks his lips, the wet sounds of your pussy like a melody to his ears. “But instead, you want to be a bitch. I don’t get it.”
“K-Kookie…” you draw out a moan, a hand cupping your breast. You can feel the familiar churning in your stomach. “I’m gonna cum-”
“No you aren’t.” Jungkook removes his fingers from inside of you, hand slapping your clit.
Your eyes shoot open, your pussy clenching around nothing. “W-What-”
Your mouth is stuffed with Jungkook’s fingers, your tongue twirling around them.
“See how good you taste?” Jungkook questions, removing his fingers to grip your chin tightly. “I would let you cum but…I’m sure you can always find someone else to do it. Since you enjoy faking so much.”
Your heart is pumping and you flush hot with embarrassment. You aren’t sure what to say - Jungkook had you beat.
“Aw,” Jungkook chuckles. “You look so sad, baby. I can let you cum.”
You swallow, glancing away from Jungkook.
“Is that what you want?”
You nod your head, but Jungkook wants to hear you.
You yelp when your clit is slapped once more. “Use your words, baby.”
“Y-Yes!” you try not to moan and sound too desperate, but it’s inevitable.
“Yes what, baby?” Jungkook’s already tugging his bottom half off, his underwear going along with it. His shirt is next, chisel abs in your line of vision that you groan at just the sight. “Tell me what you want, Y/N. You have a mouth any other time.”
Fuck Jeon Jungkook.
Fuck Jeon Jungkook and his cocky attitude.
Fuck Jeon Jungkook and his amazing dick that has you following along with him. “Please fuck me.” you sigh in defeat. “Please make me cum, Kook.”
“With pleasure.” Jungkook is delighted. He slaps the top of his cock against your clit, licking his lips. “So wet. To think you said someone else can have you like this.”
Jungkook wasn’t going to let that go - you can only imagine how hard he was going to fuck-
“J-Jungkook…!” you shout in surprise at how hard he enters you, his thrusting increasing by the second. Your back slams against the bed with each thrust, and it only bounces back just as hard.
“You can handle it, Y/N.” Jungkook hisses, fingernails digging into your flesh. “You don’t want me to be nice, you don’t want to be my girl…”
Your eyes roll to the back of your head, panting heavily. Jungkook’s tone appears serious - you’d have to ask later on if your words really got to him like they appeared to have.
“I let you…fuck…” Jungkook’s head hangs, eyes unsure where to focus. Your breast bounced furiously in rhythm with his pounding. Your face is scrunched with pleasure, a bit of drool in the corner of your mouth. “...I let you sit on my face. I let you spend as much of my money as you’d like with no limit. I…”
Jungkook grips your chin once more, forcing you to focus on him. It’s difficult - Jungkook doesn’t allow you a second to breathe, but you don’t want him to.
“And all I really ask you to be is my girl.”
It pains for him to remove himself from you - all he wants is to cum deep inside of you like you’d allow him before. But - his pride and ego got the best of him. If you were going to front as if you didn’t need him to cum, then you weren’t.
“Kook…” you cry in defeat, pussy once more clenching around nothing.
Jungkook laughs, a dark glee in the tone. “And like I said before, Y/N…” your eyes flutter a bit looking at his face - dark lust filled eyes staring right into yours. “...I can have you on your back begging for me, can’t I?”
Fuck Jeon Jungkook.
Your chest heaves. “Fuck you.” you curse at how meek your voice appeared.
“I bet you’d like that baby.” Jungkook plays with your clit slightly. “You’re my girl, right?”
You lick your lips, thighs quivering.
“Say it and I’ll let you cum.” Jungkook centers his tip at your entrance, thumb circling against your wet bud. “That’s all I want from you, baby. You can have anything you want from me…”
Jungkook enters you slowly this time. Your groan is long and deep, your hands reaching out to grab Jungkook’s bicep.
“J-Jungkook.” you trail off - the pleasure now getting to you. You just wanted to cum by him - his hands, mouth, cock, whatever it took.
“Yes, baby?” Jungkook breathes - he’s unsure himself if he’d be able to last long like this and then his ego would be hurt (but then again, he wouldn’t have blueballs).
“Please make me cum, Kookie.” you wail, hot tears falling down your face. You had to look utterly pathetic weeping for dick. Jungkook’s ego was now going to skyrocket and this moment is something he would forever hold over your head - no jokes from you could ever be taken now. “I had you on your back crying for me, baby” - you can hear it now.
But - you were desperate. Jungkook was hot, his dick was amazing and you’d allow him to have this over you.
“I’m your girl, Kookie.”
Jungkook shudders - and now he’s truly satisfied. He pounds into you sloppily, certain that neither of you were going to last long. You’re clenching around him so heavenly, moaning and crying his names that he cannot help but want to cum inside of you each and every time.
“I know you’re close, baby.” you hear Jungkook say, his forehead - moist with sweat - pressed onto yours. “We can come together, okay?”
“Y-Yea…” you nod, but you wrap your arms around Jungkook and press your lips against his. You’re groaning against the kiss, already cumming on his cock.
Jungkook feels the electric shock go through him and he shudders. With a few more thrusts, Jungkook cums inside of you, trembling at the sensation.
Ten minutes it’s what it took for you and Jungkook to come back to reality. You’re sweaty and you haven’t even done anything.
“You wanna shower?” Jungkook’s voice pipes in. “Are you okay? I didn’t go too overboard, right?”
You nod your head. “I’m okay.” you murmur.
Jungkook nods. He kisses your temple. “I can start the shower for you-”
“You aren’t coming?” you ask once you feel Jungkook shuffle on the bed.
“I-I..” Jungkook’s eyes are wide and doe like. He appears completely surprised that you offered such a thing. “You’d like me to?”
You laugh at his expression. How you manage to remove yourself from the bed is beyond you - your legs are shaking with pain that you’re not upset about.
Jungkook feels your hands against his bare chest and he tilts his head, awaiting your response. “I said I was your girl, wasn’t I?” you murmur, sending a kiss to his chest.
In seconds, Jungkook is erect again at just the admission.
Series Masterlist
#ungodly hour#explicit-tae#bts smut#btswritersclub#bangtanwritershq#btsmasterlist2022#bangtan smut#jungkook x reader#jungkook smut#fake tweets#bts college au#bts fwb#jungkook friends with benefits#btswriterscollective#btswritingcafe#bangtanwriters net
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haters will say he did not score a goal...
stl@dal 10.12.23
#first goal of the season 2 me#bc offsides is fake if it doesnt benefit my team#beautiful scary blue eyes....#mason marchment#dallas stars#stars lb#cel gifs
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#house md#gregory house#james wilson#hilson#screencap#s04e12 “Don't Ever Change”#s04e16 “Wilson's Heart”#s06e06 “known unknowns”#s06e09 “wilson”#s08e19 “The C Word”#s08e22 “Everybody Dies”#sacrifices himself for wilson sacrifices himselfforwilsonsacrificeshimself#himself his beliefs his drugs his life#inspired by that post#so besides SACRIFICES#house could've been recognized at the conference even with a fake badge. he's famous in his field you will not convince me otherwise#or infamous lmao#which means he's even more memorable#and he doesnt benefits from this directly#thats potential reputation/job sacrifice and beliefs too you know he didnt agree with that paper#remember s1 speech incident? yeah... both times wilson was on the line but by s6 house is jumping in to shield him#also some risk for their friendship to save Wilson's career by drugging him#some because those fuckers do casually drug each other on the daily#and hanging with wilson recovering even though he was against the operation#“what if i need your liver” WTFWTFNORMALBEHAVIORCHALLENGE#anyways#thats beliefs/ego sacrifice#these are the ones that came to mind
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