#fake certificate case

[rightnewshindi]

जयपुर मदरसा कांड: मौलवी ने छात्रा का अपहरण कर रचाया फर्जी निकाह, जान से मारने की धमकी, पिता ने लगाई जांच की गुहार

Jaipur News: जयपुर में एक सनसनीखेज मामला सामने आया है, जहां एक मदरसे में पढ़ाने वाले मौलवी मुफ्ती सलीम पर एक छात्रा का अपहरण कर फर्जी निकाह रचाने और उसके साथ अनैतिक व्यवहार करने का गंभीर आरोप लगा है। इस घटना ने न केवल स्थानीय लोगों को स्तब्ध कर दिया है, बल्कि सनातन धर्म के प्रति संवेदनशीलता रखने वालों में भी आक्रोश पैदा कर दिया है। छात्रा के पिता ने पुलिस में शिकायत दर्ज कराई है और इस मामले में…

[addie-henderson]

Jake Peralta + "controversially" younger partner (16 year gap)

ok but imagine you're 20 at a club, you used a fake id to get in and you're scared shitless. and then the fucking police show up questioning people about a drug case so you definitely decide: it's time to go.

you pack up your cute little mini backpack and say bye to your friends and you bump right into detective Jake Peralta and you see the badge and expect him to be angry and instead he just smiles at you as he helps you find your footing and you adjust the tiny skirt that suddenly doesn't feel like enough fabric. "are you ok?"

imagine you've been dating for about 8 months before you meet the squad and they start in on the jokes. "don't you have school in the morning?" "is it almost bed time?" Terry LITERALLY calls you " kiddo" and Jake doesn't understand why they're joking.

"dude they're like a college sophomore, youre 36."

"they are not a college sophomore 😮"

que an awkward conversation later that week after scheme after scheme have failed and trying to see your driver's license or birth certificate 'naturally' you're laying next to each other in his bed he just turns and says "how old are you?"

"20" you shrug and keep scrolling on your phone.

"oh my God, I'm a cradle robber."

"that is actually such a wild thing to say right now."

[petriwriting]

Bright Future Ahead - JJ Maybank X Reader

Based on THIS request.

Summary: Reader tells JJ they are pregnant.

A/N Did not proofread, wrote this at the gym lol

“C’mon baby girl,” JJ says, the little girls footsteps thud on the floor as she toddler-waddles over to JJ, whose across the hall.

John B and Sarah had a few errands to run, so you and JJ had offered to watch over their sweet daughter Ella Rouledge while they did so. She was so sweet, an Angel with little curls and eyes like her fathers. She was bold and adventurous, taking after both of her parents in that regard. One thing she particularly liked was playing dress up with JJ. Her god father was her idol, she wanted to be just like him, even mimicking his mannerisms from a young age, it was so heart warming to see. You couldn’t wait to have your own child.

Over the last 5 years, the Pogues had given up on treasure hunting, and everyone was settled into a comfortable and safe life. You and JJ had been through everything together, and you loved him more than anyone could imagine and in return you were his whole world. You had gotten engaged shortly after Morocco, JJ had said he didn’t want to waste anymore time because he knew you were the one, and in case they were swept on another crazy adventure he wanted you to be his, officially. You’d taken his last name and had a backyard ceremony with the group with string lights and beer, and a pastor certificate pope and Cleo found online it was in fact legally binding. Since then, JJ had put a lot of his energy into his business, JJ Maybanks deep sea charters, a huge success, now with a second location opening on the other side of the island. Everyone was making enough money to live comfortably, however in Pogue fashion they certainly did not live like kooks. John B and Sarah were fully invested in their family, Cleo and Pope were doing well too, as pope was finishing his degree. All was well for those 5 years, the good and the bad. You were thankful that JJ stuck with you through it all. He had grown into himself, and matured a lot after the incident with his father. He had healed significantly. You were thankful to have seen it all. Reminiscing on the past had only further directed your mind to your future ahead of you…

“Can I brush your hair?” The little girl squeals excitedly, her mother had her hair in braids with bows and they wiggled as she moved excitedly across the playroom. “Sure kiddo, anything.” JJ chuckled and sat down on the floor while the girl brought out her play makeup and hair accessories. You approached the room, and stood in the doorway. “Whose hungry for lunch?” You say with a smile. “Me me!!!” The girl yells excitedly. “Me too,” JJ chuckles. “Well, I’m thinking tomato soup and grilled cheese sandwiches?” You offered. “Sounds delicious!” JJ exclaimed, looking at himself in the fake mirror.

“Are you sure about this one?” He asks, playing along with the girls banter. She was desolately trying to reach JJs head while he sat on the floor and was brushing what she could reach while comparing the butterfly hair clips with his complexion. “This one,” she says insistently, settling on a blue clip, JJ had to clip it to his own hair because she struggled to do so by herself, her tiny hands weren’t quite strong enough. “Wow! This one really brings out my eyes, huh Y/N?” He turned to you who was admiringly watching playtime unfold from the doorway still. “You look so fabulous.” You reply still holding a slight smile. You would have gladly played with the girl if she wanted, but there was something about JJ that she just loved and you couldn’t blame her. She had said he has better hair the last time they played princess together, and that it was more fun to play with than your hair, you weren’t particularly offended by this though. “I’ll get lunch started, you say, disappearing into the kitchen. You didn’t want to leave, lingering for a few moments watching Ella begin to paint JJ’s nails a glittery purple color. He was no match for her.

As you prepared lunch for the three of you, you could hear the girl’s innocent laughter and JJs colliding. She was delighted her uncle JJ was playing with her. It warmed your heart to imagine how sweet and tender and caring he would be when the two of you decided to start a family. It made you flush, and you felt fuzzy and warm as if you had only just fallen in love with him, instead your were falling deeper in love with JJ.

The thing was, you had just found out you were pregnant. The morning prior, you had taken a test after not feeling too great for a few days and as if shocked, you gasped when you found out. It wasn’t that you weren’t ready for this step in your future, it was that you were slightly sad to mourn the loss of the things you were able to do with JJ alone, like showering together and having sex on the couch in the middle of the day. Sure, they were great, but that sadness and slight doubt was replaced when you saw how amazing he was with Ella, he was attentive and caring, gentle and soft. He showed his gentle side only with her, and sometimes you wanted to squeal in excitement because of how cute it was.

Pretty soon, there would be a little JJ running around causing trouble, and you couldn’t be happier to think of it. Now, you just had to tell JJ himself. You’d taken 4 boxes worth of tests to be sure, and Sarah had helped book an appintment for you later that week with the doctor that helped her through her pregnancy, you had told kie as well and she immediately bought you a pack of prenatal vitamins and healthy snacks. Something she said was absolutely vital. She even offered to show you some pregnancy yoga stretches she taught other women. Everyone was excited for you, even John B, who Sarah had told by accident. You were slightly worried you wouldn’t find the right moment to tell JJ, not that he would react badly, just that it was such a big moment for the two of you.

You were lost in your own world while you prepared the soup and made the sandwiches in the routledge kitchen, you hadn’t noticed how quiet things had gotten. It had only been a little less than an hour, so curiosity got the better of you and you wandered back into the playroom. JJ shushed you before you could say anything and your eyes met his. Ella was sleeping peacefully cuddled up my JJ’s side, she must have wanted him to read a story and had fallen asleep. The poor girl must have been exhausted from playing. JJ looked at you with a soft smile, 2 pink butterfly clips were in his hair, and he looked a bit goofy but he was still your JJ.

You smiled softly at him, “Let me,” you mouthed to him, reaching for Ella and gently picking her up in your arms to tuck her into bed. JJ pulled a soft blanket over her as she lay peacefully sleeping. You turned for the door, while JJ leaned down and kissed her forehead. “Sleep tight cupcake.” He said softly, before joining you. You gently shut the door behind you and lead JJ to the kitchen.

“Gosh she is somethin’ else.” JJ says with a slight laugh, taking the clips out of his hair. “I love the nail color on you, very complimentary.” You joke. You proceeded to the kitchen, where you both enjoyed the lunch you had made in comfortable silence. JJ knew something was up since you were acting oddly in that moment. After eating, you sighed and went to clean to rinse the dishes, putting them into the dish washer.

“Hey,” you said finally. “Can we talk?” You ask, JJ smiles gently “of course.” He says. “What’about?” He asks you. “Well.” You begin, he can tell you’re upset, nervous at least. He takes your hands in his gently holding them in a comforting way he waits patiently for you to let it out, and when you are ready after a moment you do. “Seeing you and Ella makes my heart melt, you are so sweet with her and it just,” you stutter, stopping yourself. “It makes me realize how much of an amazing father you’ll be.” You look up at the ocean eyes of his, “I can’t wait to start a family with you.” He admits softly. “And you know I’m ready whenever you are.” He explains. He had said before he was patiently waiting for you to be ready, and he would support you however you needed. “Jayj,” you say gently. “I’m uh,” you sigh softly. “I’m pregnant.”

Silence, JJs expression that was soft turns into an elated smile. “Really, baby?” He asks in disbelief. “Yes.” You confirm. “Like 6 tests.” He embraces you tightly for a quick moment. “Oh my god,” he says through a smile and a joyous laugh. “We’re havin’ a baby!” He exclaims. “Woo!” He says loudly, with a fist up in victory. you shush hun reminding him of Ella sleeping a few doors down. JJ gets kinda serious for a few minutes, and leans down so he his face to face with your stomach, “hear that baby Maybank?” He says, “your mama and I are gonna spoil you rotten. I’ll give you everything I always wanted as a kid. We’re gonna love you so much,” JJ says, his voice cracks as he’s gotten emotional, teary eyed. “I love you so much.” He says, to both you and your baby. He embraces you with his head rested on your stomach.

You enjoy his touch and run your fingers through his hair for a few moments, he finally stands up fully again and wipes the tears from his eyes and kisses you deeply, you are so swept up in his embrace you don’t hear Sarah and John B coming back home with a few groceries. JJ pulls back immediately and goes over to John B, “we’re having a baby!” He exclaims. John B shares his excitement and they embrace. “Congratulations, man.” He pats JJ on the back. Sarah is excited too and smiled at you, scurrying to put the handful of groceries away. “Well I didn’t know you were going to tell him now.” She says with a sigh, reaching under the sink and pulling out a very expensive and fancy bottle of sparkling cider. “But we got this as a gift to celebrate!” She exclaims popping the bottle open with a satisfying fizz of bubbles and a pop.

The rest of the evening is spent in a happy daze, a night you’ll remember for the rest of your life. Kie had come over and hugged both of you very happily, and Pope and Cleo shortly after. The evening was spent in celebration, sharing happy memories and drinks. Nob alcoholic ones for you of course. Deep down you knew you were right where you needed to be and you couldn’t think of a better man to have as your baby’s father than JJ Maybank.

Taglist: @jsbaby

[pukefactory]

🤤pls i need salesperson ena AND meanie ena to degrade me and call me pathetic PLSL tell me u see the vision

•☽────✧˖°˖ PATHETIC CHOICES ˖°˖✧────☾•

★ Summary: A Compilation of Headcanons Featuring Salesperson Ena Degrading The Reader

★ Character(s): Salesperson Ena (Ena: Dream BBQ)

★ Genre: Headcanons

★ Warning(s): Slightly Suggestive

★ Image Credits: @JoelG

☆ Salesperson Ena starts the “pitch” with fake concern. She clasps her clawed hands together, voice smooth as a well-rehearsed script. “Oh, dear. Oh, sweetheart. You’re looking a little down on your luck today, aren’t you? Lost? Confused? Pathetic?” Her grin stretches wide. “I can help you with that! I can sell you a new identity! One where you’re marginally less pitiful!”

☆ Meanie Ena doesn’t have the patience for this. “OH, WHAT, YOU WANNA HEAR ME SAY IT?! FINE! YOU’RE PATHETIC!” She throws her hands up, staring you down with that sharp, geometric glare. “WHAT, YOU WANT A REWARD FOR BEING A LOSER? YOU WANT A FREAKIN’ CERTIFICATE? ‘OH CONGRATULATIONS, YOU’RE THE SADDEST THING I’VE EVER SEEN!’”

☆ Salesperson Ena is a master at passive-aggressive degradation. “Mmm. Oh, honey. Oh, champ. You are just… absolutely trying your best, aren’t you?” She sighs, shaking her head. “And yet, somehow, that best is still so abysmally low. Have you considered a career change? Perhaps into something more fitting for your… particular skillset? Say, sitting quietly and being a little failure?”

☆ Meanie Ena doesn’t do subtle things. “I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU EXIST. I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU WERE BORN. OH MY GOD. I WANNA PUT YOU IN A DISPLAY CASE AND CHARGE PEOPLE TO POINT AND LAUGH.”

☆ Salesperson Ena loves to act like she’s being kind. “Oh, sweet thing, don’t look so down! Some people are just born to be stepped on, you know? It’s a valuable role in society! Think of how much joy you bring by being an example of what not to be! Truly, you are doing a service.”

☆ Meanie Ena treats you like the world’s stupidest riddle. “HOW. HOW DID YOU END UP LIKE THIS. NO, REALLY, I NEED TO KNOW. WHAT LIFE DECISIONS LED TO THIS MOMENT? WERE YOU JUST BORN THIS SAD? DID YOU WAKE UP ONE DAY AND GO ‘OH BOY I HOPE SOMEONE YELLS AT ME TODAY’?!?!”

☆ Salesperson Ena offers a solution, but it’s just more insults. “Now, now, no need to fret! Lucky for you, I have just the thing! A custom-designed program guaranteed to help sad, little, pathetic creatures like yourself! It’s called: ‘Oh My God, Get Your Life Together!’ And the first lesson? Try harder!”

☆ Meanie Ena makes it your problem. “DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW MUCH SECONDHAND EMBARRASSMENT YOU’RE GIVING ME? I HAVE TO STAND HERE AND WITNESS THIS. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS TO LOOK AT YOU RIGHT NOW?!?”

☆ Salesperson Ena treats this like a business opportunity. “Oh, what’s that? You like being degraded? My, my, what an incredibly niche and marketable trait! You know, I could sell you as a brand! We’ll call it: ‘The Most Pitiful Fool Alive!’ Your face on billboards! Your misery is monetized! What do you say? Sign here, here, and here.”

☆ Meanie Ena doesn’t get why you’re enjoying this. “NO. NO, YOU DON’T GET TO BE HAPPY ABOUT THIS. STOP SMILING. WHY ARE YOU SMILING. DAMN IT, STOP ENJOYING THIS, IT’S MAKING ME MORE MAD!”

[scam-alerts]

🔎Scam Exam(ination)🔍(updated 2/12/25)

Seen as: Selling HRT / Testosterone Scam Type: Fake Product / Fraud

Platform: Tumblr

Accounts running this scam: sirwinz

-----

This scam mostly targets LGBTQ+ individuals, mainly Trans folk who post in such related tags.

Those who do may receive a DM, comment, ask, or any such related contact from another tumblr user who claims to be a certified™ Doctor, Therapist, Pharmacist, ect, who is trying to offer you a 'new and amazing' drug that's not on the market, or a 'cheap alternative medicine' to name brand HRT or Testosterone.

One such account that popped up recently of this is drfelixortega.

Here is what their tumblr page looks like:

And this is the ask that they are sending users:

(Screenshot taken from this post.)

If you visit their page, you will only find six posts.

All very generic in nature.

None of which link to any sort of certification or credentials that prove that this person is a 'real' doctor. They just say they are a totally real (no fake) Doctor and expect people to go with it.

Like most scammers usually to do.

Here's another version of where another HRT scammer leaves comments on peoples posts:

-----

Why this is a scam:

1 - The risk.

Purchasing any sort of drug online from a shady dealer is not only a good way to get scammed, it's a good way to get sick and possibly even die. You have no idea what sort of ingredients are in the pills these supposed Doctors online are trying to sell you.

There was a story that surfaced on my local news station that talked about how in South Korea, capsules were seized that contained the contents of herbs and a mixture of human flesh/DNA.

When tested, the human material was found to belong to infants.

If you wish to read more, you can find the 2015 article here. But be warned, it is very disturbing. (No pictures)

2 - The scam.

I know that getting HRT or even Testosterone can be hard, and I know how the struggle and the desire to truly be yourself can become overwhelming. Your insurance may not pay for it, or you might not even have insurance to begin with, leaving without hope at all in your journey to begin transitioning.

But that still doesn't mean you should believe every offer that seems too good to be true the moment you're offered it online. In more cases than none, you will give these people money, and never receive a product.

Think about these things for a second:

Why would a doctor, surgeon, pharmacist, what have you, be on Tumblr of all places? Why would they browse the trans tag, or other such related tags, to find potential 'clients?' Don't you usually have to make an appointment with a doctor? For your insurance to then pay for to cover your medicine? How can a board certified pharmacist.. be a gender assessment surgeon at the same time? (it's a lie, that's why.)

3 - The truth.

The truth of the matter is, you cannot, unfortunately, get HRT or Testosterone without seeing a doctor for a prescription.

And buying it online from any sort of 3rd party website or manufacturer is simply putting not only your wallet at risk, but your life at risk.

Here is a screenshot taken from this GoodRX article:

Here is an article on the risks and dangers of buying unregulated / unlicensed HRT. One big one being that they can be contaminated.

And a final, general consensus from google:

-----

Final Thoughts:

As I've said in a few of my past scam Exam(inations), if something seems too good to be true, it most likely is. I know how life changing something can be and how desperate wanting it can make you, but please don't risk your wallet, or your life, for it.

Remember: These are just words these people offer you.

Ask for proof. In most cases they will not send you any and will get combative that you asked. If they do send you any kind of images, remember, you can reverse image search them to try and find the source. If you get pushy in asking for their credentials they'll probably end up blocking you and just want you to 'trust them' or send you clearly edited photos made in photoshop.

Never give anyone your personal information such as name, adress, phone number, occupation, birth date, SSN, a photo of yourself or your ID, or any kind of credit card information online who is selling you a product, especially if it's via a DM or chatroom type service or e-mail.

And never go to a strange website you don't know or have never heard of without googling it first.

You can also run it through something like VirusTotal to check if any of the big/main websites like Bitdefender or Kaspersky that detect things like phishing, viruses/trojans/maware, and all that fun stuff, have picked up on it being malicious.

Just... Be safe.

Please make sure you think before you talk to people like this.

Take care everyone. <3

----

Disclaimer: Tags are relevant to the content of this post. This is not 'tag spam' or 'unrelated'. I'm just spreading awareness about this scam targeting people taking hormone drugs like HRT which also includes people other than just trans folk. :)

[stealthetrees]

Fox and the Mandalorian Adoption Instinct VS all the People he’s Stolen from

Rex- biggest rivalry. Fox got all the favorites, Fives, Echo, Dogma, and Tup but that’s only the main characters. The 501st are too chaotic and often end up involved in something top secret and they get a fake death certificate and drafted into the Guard as a result. The collective is referred to as Rex’s Idiots cause they’re too unruly to be trusted anywhere near the senate. Great for off world missions tho. Rex would fight tooth and nail to get them back once he finds out they’re not dead but Corries are too territorial. Anyone who goes back chose to.

Wolffe- very few, and only in extreme cases. Their adopted father/general always wants to get involved in the case and therefore it must be watertight. Avoided at all costs. Causes a huge custody battle after the war. The Clones being fought over have long since accepted having two fathers and are just enjoying the show.

Cody- pissed he never knew bc he didn’t figure it out till he got the memo. “I have your troopers and you can’t have them back finders keepers lol” is just something he opposes on principle. Trusts Fox to be a good dad but still.

Ponds- complains to Windu about it, and when he hints he may have known about Fox’s nonconsensual adoption program he pretends like he did too

Hunter- he don’t get an opinion on this because Fox claims Echo as part of the Domino Twin set and got adopted as collateral. Only a little grumpy about it

Anakin- when he finds out Fox tried to fake Ashokas death to get a second Jedi working for him (Quinlan Vos being the first) he’s not really sure how to feel about about it

Padme- her handmaidens dividing their loyalty equally between Fox and Padme is understandable, and she only tolerates him because he used their help to scam so many people she also worked against. They have a civil negotiation on who gets them on what holidays.

[deadsetobsessions]

Tim drake triplet au owns my soul I’m not gonna lie

Have some more ✨

——

Moral and ethical crises aside, having three Robins increased the crime fighting rate exponentially. Crooks could not do even a mildly villainous scheme without being cheerfully beaten down (Lionel), robbed blind (Tim), and having their operations permanently crippled (Archy). At this point, the only reason the Rogues were still alive was because Batman insisted on handling them.

“There’s a weird ship coming into Gotham bay~!” Lionel sang, skipping into the room with an armful of papers. Alfred sedately followed behind him, with a plate full of snacks and milk. He had been passive aggressive in feeding them, muttering something about making up for lost time.

“Thanks, Alfred,” Tim mumbled, grabbing a snack. One hand was doing case work, the other (the hand that grabbed a snack) was doing homework. “Yeah, I clocked that. Some pretty interesting people on it.”

“Once again, Bruce’s old flings haunt our doorstep.” Archy crossed the room and plucked some of the papers off of Lionel.

“Ugh, don’t remind me. People are gonna come flocking to his gates with the fake baby traps again at the end of the social season.” Tim grimaced, remembering all the cheek pinches he endured last season as he headed off anyone that would approach Bruce in his Brucie persona.

“Talia al Ghul is a different kind of issue.”

“I’d take fist fighting her over Mrs. Laughfy’s pinching any day.”

“Gee, I kind of want to meet Talia. She seems kind of badass.” Lionel plopped down onto his seat, dumping the rest of the papers onto the table. “Dick hates her though. Oh, Archy, here’s all of the paperwork from that shady chemical plant.”

“Thanks.” Archy went back to the drawing board, drafting up a complicated corporate scheme that ended up with Drake industries acquiring said shady chemical plants. They were planning the reveal of the Drake triplets soon, but their method had much to be planned.

As a matter of fact…

“As expected,” Archy scribbled something on a piece of paper. “Our best bet is to pretend we were always there.”

“Gaslight, gatekeep, girl-boss!”

The triplets nodded and moved on, Archy forging their birth certificates.

Idle conversation started up again, rotating between their upcoming gaslight gatekeep girl boss masterplan, Talia’s arrival, and whether or not they should dye Jason’s hair bright purple.

“I wonder why she came? She got on the ship with a… kid.” Tim stilled, dawning horror and realization settling upon his face. “No way.”

“Oh. Oh, that’s juicy.” Lionel grinned like a bat fresh out of hell.

“We need more information.” Archy set aside his papers, an indication of intense focus from him.

The door clicked open and three heads swung in unison.

“Hey, guys, what are you…” Dick faltered as three sets of piercing blue eyes locked onto him. “Uh. Something wrong?”

Lionel dove at the door, shutting it closed and locking it.

Tim sprung up and clamped a hand onto Dick’s wrist. His smile became eerily polite. “Dick! We had a couple of questions for you!”

Dick glanced down at him, back at Lionel, and then forward at Archy’s widening grin. He shuddered.

“Am I about to die?” He wondered out loud, resigning himself to his fate as his baby-birds dragged him over to their war table.

——

“You didn’t know about me.”

“…No.”

“But we did!” Damian startled, unsheathing his sword in record time and swinging an arc of deadly blades towards the voice.

“Heya! I’m Robin!”

“I am also Robin.” Damian sidled back and looked up, weapon at the ready. Two identical Robins perched on the flickering street lamps, tilting their heads down at him.

“Hey, Damian. I’m Robin.” The one on the left waves.

“Boys,” his father sighed.

“Can it, B. I can’t believe you did the horizontal tango with Talia, of all people.”

Damian bristled. “You would not be worth the ground mother walks upon, you ingrate!”

The three robins looked at each other and simultaneously looked back at Damian. “Oh, we like you. Yes, you’re about to be our new favorite brother.”

Damian didn’t know whether to lunge at them or be flattered.

“C’mon, Wayne junior. We’ll show you around. Pick an alias, one you can use before we train you to be Robin.”

“I… I will fight you! Robin is mine by right! I am father’s blood son!”

One of the Robins perched on top of the lamp post grinned, half feral as he swung down. “We’d like to see you try, little bird.”

“Stop antagonizing him. Damian, you’ll become Robin eventually, but the only way is to get acknowledged by the former Robins. There’s so much more to becoming Robin than being good at combat like you are.”

“We’ll teach you! Robin lesson number one! Annoy B with competence!” The cheery Robin cheered.

“No.”

They ignored Batman. Damian, after checking his father’s face and not finding anything other than exhaustion, followed their example hesitantly.

“Here, take this grapple.” The serious Robin handed him a grapple and a domino mask. “Second lesson, Robins fly through the sky. We can stalk, sure, but we fly better than anyone else.”

Damian glanced at Batman again, before taking the grapple. In unison, the Robins shot up and away.

“Let’s go, Damian. We shouldn’t leave them unsupervised.”

“They are not competent enough to patrol alone?”

Father grimaced. “They are. But if we leave them be, they’ll take over Gotham in a matter of weeks.”

Damian’s respect towards the Robins went up a couple of notches. He put on the domino and grappled after the Robins.

When they find Joker goons transporting goods, the third Robin (Timothy, he found out later) turned to him and smirked.

“Third lesson? The punishment has to fit the crime. Those are stolen goods. So we rob them blind.”

“Those goods are evidence, Robin,” Father rumbled. Damian tensed, but the Robins remained relaxed.

“Okay, so we don’t touch the evidence, but everything else is fair game. Wallets, keys, lightbulbs.”

“That is incredibly petty,” Damian snapped.

“Well, B said we can’t murder them and maiming someone for stealing is too much. So, petty we must be, to refrain from going off the deep end.”

Damian considered tossing them off the roof, but these infernal fools would probably laugh and return to the roofs like cockroaches.

——

Damian watched the carnage in awe. The Robins were incredibly efficient and effective, drawing terror from their victims even before even commencing a beat down.

“I will accept their guidance,” Damian muttered to himself.

Behind him Batman lowered his head into hands in a moment of weakness. He prayed to allah and his parents for patience… and sanity.

——

“Jaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyysonnnnnnn!”

“Oh, fuck no!” Jason shot out rubber bullets without hesitation. “Fuck off, you demon!”

“But don’t you want to meet our youngest brother?”

Jason lowered his guns, glaring at Lionel’s chirpy face. “What? I’ve already met Tim.”

“Nope! Apparently, Bruce had a kid with, I shit you not, Talia al Ghul!”

Jason holstered his guns, interested in any mockery aimed at Bruce. “No way. You’re lying.”

“Nope! Meet Damian!”

Behind Lionel, Bruce’s mini-me stepped out. “Todd.”

Jason straightened and stepped closer, though noticeably giving Lionel a wide berth. He was never going to let the old man live this down. And from the looks of it, he had allies in the form of the three terrors.

——

Bruce looked down at the cake. He looked back up.

On one hand, his kids were getting along.

On the other hand… he was getting bullied by his kids.

Bruce heard a low chuckle.

Scratch that, he was being unjustly bullied by his kids and Alfred.

In front of the exhausted dad of six (and future dad of so many more), sat a cake with the words “congrats, it’s a boy!” and a picture of Talia.

[jubileesstuff]

Another one of my Nico Di Angelo is part of the Batfam Posts, (and he knew Jason from before).

Bruce wants his new son to go to school. However, Nico needs a birth certificate and an ID first. Tim and Bruce search for a Nico Di Angelo; they only find a Nico Di Angelo from 1932 in Italy, who disappeared in the 1940s. But their Nico is a teenager and definitely not a old man. During a lunch together with the entire family, they confront him about it; they probably think they just misspelled his name or forgot a middle name. But no, Nico confirms that this is him, the guy that was born in 1932. Everyone looks weirdly at him. That would make him older than Alfred. (This is an HC, and in my head, Alfred is in his late 60s to early 70s).

Tim is kind of stoked about it, because that means he can solve the case about the missing Di Angelo family. Everyone else (except Jason, who obviously knew about that) is like, 'How the hell are you still alive and this young-looking? What's your skincare routine?'.

So Nico has to go into an explanation of why he is still this young and about the whole disappearing thing. The Batfamily knows that Greek gods are real, they know Wonder Woman and Nico. But this family drama sounds intense.

After Nicos explanation, everyone is confused. Dick because he technically isn't the oldest brother anymore. Tim because he now has more unsolved cases to solve. Damian because the league didn't teach much about Greek mythology, and he has some more learning to do. Bruce, because what do you mean his new son is technically older than him? Alfred, because what do you mean his new grandson is older than him? Duke because he isn't quite sure if he can ask Nico about his life in the 1930s (he needs it for homework about life before the Second World War) or if it's rude to ask. Steph because she still wants to know Nico's skincare, and she really wants to call him Grandpa now. Cass is mostly confused because she isn't quite sure if she is now an older sister or a younger sister to Nico. Barbara is confused because she isn't sure which place she should make Nico's birth country. And if she chooses Italy, she would have to fake a visa too.

I have so many ideas, I might actually write a fanfiction.

[astra-ravana]

Acquiring, Keeping, and Caring For Cursed Objects

So, you want a cursed object? Maybe you're a collector of haunted artifacts, a chaos witch who loves a challenge, or just someone who thinks “possessed” is a selling point. Whatever your reason, handling cursed items is an art—one that requires knowledge, caution, and maybe a good exorcist on speed dial.

Where to Find Cursed Objects

If you’re looking to acquire an object with questionable spiritual history, try:

Thrift Stores & Estate Sales

• Old mirrors, antique dolls, and Victorian jewelry are prime candidates.

• Look for items with a strange energy or eerie backstory from previous owners.

• Cursed objects tend to feel either cold or warm.

Online Marketplaces

• eBay and Etsy occasionally feature items labeled as “haunted” or “cursed.”

• Be wary of fakes—if it comes with a certificate of authenticity, it’s probably a gimmick.

Abandoned & Historical Sites

• Be very careful when taking objects from old buildings, cemeteries, or battlefields. Some spirits don’t appreciate being relocated without permission.

Occult Shops & Witch Markets

• Some practitioners sell intentionally hexed, haunted, or enchanted objects.

• Check the seller’s reputation before buying something that might decide to rearrange your furniture at night.

How to Identify a Cursed Object

Not all creepy antiques are cursed, but some red flags include:

Unexplained Bad Luck - After bringing the object home, things start breaking, people fall ill, or your cat suddenly hates you.

Disturbing Dreams & Nightmares - If an item gives you visions of past tragedies, or whispers in the night—it’s probably cursed.

Strange Physical Reactions - Feeling cold, dizzy, or heavy near the object? That’s a sign of a strong energy attachment.

Moving or Vanishing on Its Own - If the object relocates itself, refuses to stay put, or vanishes and reappears, congratulations—you have an active one.

Electronic & Environmental Disturbances - Flickering lights, draining batteries, and objects falling for no reason are classic signs of spirit activity.

Safely Keeping a Cursed Object

If you want to coexist with your new haunted acquisition (without getting hexed into oblivion), follow these guidelines:

Set Boundaries-

• Speak to the object (yes, really). Tell it:

“You are welcome here, but you will not harm, scare, or disrupt my space.”

• Reinforce with protective symbols (salt, runes, or sigils).

Keep It Contained-

• Glass cases help contain energy.

• A dedicated altar or place of honor makes the spirit feel welcome and appreciated.

• Iron boxes can trap aggressive spirits.

• Mirror boxes can function as a trap for many spirits.

Regular Cleansing & Offerings-

• If the spirit is sentient, occasional offerings (coins, incense, or flowers) can keep it calm.

• Empower the spirit through regular acknowledgement.

• Smoke cleansing, bells, or singing bowls can balance energy without removing the curse/spirit.

• Marshmallow root makes spirits happy and calm.

Have a Backup Plan-

• If things go wrong, have banishing components (like black salt, rue, or black tourmaline) ready.

• A witch, priest, or medium can help if the object becomes too hostile.

• Consider 'rehoming' objects that become too dangerous to a more willing collector.

• Burying, throwing into fast moving water, or burning will neutralize most objects. Some spirits may just be made furious by the disrespect, however, so be wise.

Owning a cursed object is like having a supernatural roommate—you need rules, respect, and an exit strategy. Whether you’re collecting for curiosity, magickal experimentation, or sheer thrill, just remember: some spirits are happy to stay dormant… until they’re not. Happy haunting!

[calaisreno]

Secret of Agra: Chapter 16: Turning Stones

Greg continues to investigate the disappearance of John Watson. Sally has a theory about Sherlock Holmes.

He takes another swallow of beer. “You think Allen Prescott made himself disappear? Seems likely.” “No, I was thinking about Sherlock. What if he isn’t dead?” He laughs. “Pretty hard to fake jumping off a building. And John witnessed it.” “No body, not that anyone has seen. If anyone could fake their death, it would be Sherlock Holmes — with his brother, the British Government, seeing to the death certificate, skipping over the technicality of there being no body. All this time John has been here, in London, maybe having the worst year of his life. And now, he’s suddenly very interested in missing people. Goes missing himself. Why?” “He said he might be travelling for the case of the missing woman.” Donovan is shaking her head. “He’s looking for this unnamed woman and he learns about Prescott. He begins asking himself the same questions about Sherlock’s death I’ve been asking.  ...She gives him a knowing smile. “We both know what John Watson would do if he thought Sherlock could possibly be alive.”

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Thank you for reading / reblogging! 💕

[rightnewshindi]

तमिलनाडु के शख्स ने फर्जी डिग्री से नौणी यूनिवर्सिटी में दाखिला लिया, पकड़े जाने पर गिरफ्तार #News #HindiNews #IndiaNews #RightNewsIndia

[yey56]

Villainous x reader that has had a lot of jobs and identities.

DR FLUG 🧪:

He is really curious about your life and how the hell have you managed to enter in so many jobs.

He has a lot of doctorates and has studied several science oriented careers so he's also happy that someone else has some extent qualifications.

Is honestly surprised about your stories. You once told him about working in a morgue as a mortuary assistant and how some paranormal activities happened around you.

You're his first option when he needs someone to substitute him in the lab or in any of his tasks because he knows that there's a high chance of you having already done it before.

Does not understand how you're still alive since most of your jobs have been either live threatening or just high risk.

He will never know the total of how many jobs you have done in the past. Whenever he thinks he already knows everything and that nothing can surprise him you come up with some new anecdotes about another one of your former jobs.

He once asked you if you really had all the qualifications needed for your jobs. You told him that in some jobs you had the qualifications but in others don't so you just lied and pretended (it went well because of your stupid good luck and you golden tongue 😛)

Sometimes you appear with new certificates of several different universities. Hes starting to suspect that you forged them.

You have many forged documents, he once checked your several passports and ID and in each one of them you have a different name and nationality. He's not sure why you haven't been caught yet.

But actually you have, it's just that you make new ones in another location so every police attempt to catch you after your obvious job negligences or some cases you have been accused of scamming are in vain because you keep fading.

He asks himself if you even are called what he calls you. And your answer always will be: we'll never know 🙂

Your experience gives him some calm because you have to have some experience in what you do so he trusts you to not make a havoc of everything you touch (unlike dementia).

Sometimes you two hang out studying something new or trying to teach each other something the other doesn't know. You exchange knowledge while sipping coffe and eating waffles 🥞🧇

Genuinely afraid that someday the justice system would be able to catch you.

Will always have an eye on you. He knows your a menace to his perfec organasation system.

Not gonna lie, the first time he was aware of your falsifying documet activities he was a little afraid you where going to try and use any kind of information against him.

Reader: Flug, whens your birthday

Flug: why? So you can look up my natal chart? So you can figure out my personal data?

Reader: ...So I know when to wish you a happy birthday

Flug:😧😶😶‍🌫️🫥

DEMENCIA 🦎:

You and her together are a really chaotic combination. Not recommended if you value your peace ✌️

Whenever she wants to mess with Flug or with BH she calls for you because you will know what to do in 99% of the time.

For example, she wants to play a prank on Flug but doesn't want him noticing her in the cameras. Then there you are to help her, you disconnect the camera system and somehow convince Flug it has happened out of the blue.

Basically you're the perfect accomplice for any crime she may want to commit.

Remember how I said Flug is starting to suspect that you forged your certificates. Well she bets on her life each one of them are fake, but since your strategy to play pretend always works shes not complaining. 🤗

LOVES to see (and try sometimes) your former uniforms. You have them all put away in your closet and each one of them is different from the last. Heck somehow you manage to get yourself a police uniform. 👮

You are the one making her false identities and forging her documents in case she needs them.

Her and Flug made a bet the she would never get a university degree and that the day she got one he would dress as a sheep (like the sheep jumpsuit Dipper form gravity falls got).

Well she came to you and you did not only forged her a degree, you decided that it would be funny AF to give her have a neurology degree.🧑‍🔬

Save to say that Flug passed out once she showed him the document. (You had a pretty good laugh with that)

I mean you're a pretty good team. A chaos agent and a great falsificator that's knows about everything. 💪

She will always have your back in any lie you have.

Like your telling Flug an obviously fake story about your mission with dementia in which you exagerate everything and while he looks at you doubting every word you say Dementia comes in and agrees with you, adding more shit to the lie.

You have so much fun with her and she's always in for whatever you have in mind. Save to say she's your favourite.🥰

She wants you to break in with her in some bank or prison and do the whole act of pretending to be there working only to then cause havoc and shouting down the security systems.

You joke around a lot, but sometimes the jokes get out of hand:

Dementia: Hey, you know what, I love murder mystery we should watch that.

Reader being absolutely honest for once: well for your information I've been a suspect in four murder cases 😌

Dem:😶

BLACK HAT 🎩

The vast experience is always welcome, the problem is that he has some doubts about the veracity of some of your capacities but as long as you can work well and not fuck up he's not going to scold you for forging documents or lying in the interview. 👍

Since you clearly have experience in falsifying documents he uses that to make false reports or false contracts to make future clients sign something shady.

Considering that you have worked in lots of fields he can use you for a lot of tasks. Need to restore a old paiting? There you are to do it. His snake pet is suddenly ill or with stomach issues? Worry not, you have worked at a zoo before.

And the list goes on a on. You never get bored there

Really appreciates the wit and the quick thinking you have because it's very useful in a lot of situations. Your just start talking with all of the confidence in the world even though you're probably telling the biggest lie human kind has ever witnessed. 🤫🫢

And the worst of all? It. fucking. works. Even though you seem to have no idea about something you manage to uphold a conversation pretending you know everything about it, and you can keep it up quite a while!!

You also always try to investigate about what you are trying to pretend to know about, just to stay safe.

He's probably the only one that know your real name. But the rest of the crew are always doubting which of your several identities you really are. 🥷

Also the fact that you can change your narrative and pretend to be a whole different person with a whole different life. He adores that, it's very useful for a villain to be able to know how to put an act and get away with it. 😶‍🌫️🫥

Thinks you're valuable to the organisation.

As well as dementia, hes also fully convinced that all of your certificates are false but he doesn't doubt that you have knowledge in those fields. He just thinks you forged the documents and thats it.

Will not believe your obvious exaggerated stories. You're not a reliable narrator since he knows your habit of twisting a little bit the reality or as you put it "selecting the truth".

He doesn't think your completely useless and since you have had lots of experiences in life you are somehow interesting. He feels pity for all of your former bosses, mostly because you confided him that the reason you had so many jobs is because in most of them you got fired. 😐😑

You're the nightmare of employers. 😚✌️

Somehow gets used to your shenanigans and already expects you to generate some kind of problematic situation.

BH, answering the phone: Hello?

Reader: It's reader.

BH: what did they do this time

Reader: No!, it's me, reader. It's actually me.

BH: what the hell did you do this time?! 😤🤬

Reader: it's not like I try to blow things up. It's just sort of happens. Though you've got to admit that the fire is fascinating 🔥

One of his favourites stories you told him was when you were working for an illegal organization that bringed back prehistoric animals to life with the purpose of the tourism of the rich folk.

You were fired because you shot down the security system because in your own words " I always wanted to see a diplodocus close" so since lots of life's were put in danger and some lost in that incident you were fired and sued for that.🦕

Of course you changed identities again and flew away from the place where this was taking place.

You never presented yourself at court. You're not only banned from entering that country but also you have an arrest notice. If you put a foot there you will face life sentence 🫠🙃

Kinda respects your ability to just go away and start a new whenever you go. But will not let you unsupervised.

5.0.5 🐻

Storytelling with him is a MUST.

you have told him so many stories about your past jobs and each one of them has a changed narrative by you but since he loves hearing stories he doesn't think much about it.

When Flug is busy he always asks you to help him with whatever he's doing.

He once catched restoring one of BH's paintings and also wanted to draw so he just brought a notebook next to where you were and stayed there with you.

He makes lots of drawing for you and you either hang them in your bedroom wall or put away in your drawer.

From time to time you gift him little things you have stolen from your former jobs. You worked at an acuarium? You give him a plushie of a whale you kept.

He's confused when you present yourlsef with other names, you have tried to explain it to him but it doesn't really stuck.

Really good listener, if you need to vent to someone it will sure be either him or Flug if you catch him relaxed enough.

Both of you have fun hanging out. You always tell random data about absolutely everything and he just sits there and listens to you.

[olderthannetfic]

Oof man, all this talk about selfshippers...

In the Spanish community is the same, there's no fucking escape to this kind of really toxic and dumb people.

I'm not kidding when I say that in January I saw on my feed three call-out posts about your selfishipper of choice for harassment to others, or for shit talk, or for scamming, or for doxing/try of doxing. In one particular case, there was this selfshipper that was a bit of an ass (didn't know them personally, that's what I osmosed), that did some shit talk and maybe harassed a bunch of others? And then this selfshipper disappeared from the Internet until a friend of them said they committed suicide. The people who hated this selfshipper did not liked that, in the sense that they fucking went to search for their real name, their country Registry Key (that number that says 'ah yes you are this nationality in this country and was born in this year etc etc) and their fucking death certificate. No. Again. I'm not kidding. The haters of this selfshipper tried so hard to prove that the selfshipper in question did in fact not die, but in the way they did the most insane fucking shit. Really? Is now searching for DEATH CERTIFICATES a thing now? A thing that we have to accept is the action of a totally not obsessed person? And they have the guts to say "we're the good ones". Kiss my ass.

The most recent one that was this toxic was someone that tried to imitate MsScribe but badly without the funny and without the fics. This selfshipper had like, ten accounts, ten different personalities, lied to the people they dated with, lied about having the baby of an abuser, lied about their home status and faked their death. There was videos explaining the situation like there are indexes on theater plays of every single character and their occupations. The Google Doc is enormous.

And what all this toxic selfshipper shared in common? They were/are non-sharing.

--

Ah, drama! So varied and yet all the same!

[fawnsuga]

The Tragic Case of Nicholas Prosper: A Failed Mass Shooting and Its Consequences

In a disturbing and tragic incident that has sent shockwaves through the community of Luton, England, 19-year-old Nicholas Prosper has been sentenced to life imprisonment with a minimum term of 49 years for the brutal murders of his mother and siblings. This tragic event unfolded on September 13, 2024, when Prosper killed Juliana Falcon, 48, and his two siblings, Kyle, 16, and Giselle, 13, before planning a mass shooting at his former primary school, St. Joseph's Catholic Primary School.

A Chilling Crime

Nicholas Prosper, who exhibited signs of autism spectrum disorder but was never officially diagnosed, was often described as a quiet and "geeky" boy with a strong interest in computers. However, as he grew older, he became increasingly isolated, distancing himself from friendships and engaging with disturbing online content. Investigators revealed that he had developed a strong fascination with school shootings, particularly the Sandy Hook Elementary School shooting, and had planned to murder around 30 people to achieve a higher death toll before committing suicide. The planned massacre, which had been in the works for over a year, was scheduled to take place on Friday the 13th—a date he seemed to have deliberately chosen for its ominous connotations.

On the day prior to the murders, Prosper purchased a double-barrel shotgun and 100 cartridges from a local dealer for £650, using a fake firearms license he had meticulously crafted. The dealer, believing the license to be legitimate, reported the purchase to the police later that same day, but by then, Prosper's deadly plans were already set in motion. He spent the day conducting online searches related to killing someone with a shotgun, alongside queries concerning necrophilia and the murder of Sarah Everard, a case that had captured national attention.

In the early hours of September 13, Prosper executed his horrifying plan. His mother, Juliana, discovered the shotgun he had bought and confronted him. In a fit of rage, he shot her in the head, then turned on his siblings. Giselle was shot in the face and chest, while Kyle was shot in the chest and brutally stabbed approximately 100 times. The sheer brutality of the murders left law enforcement and the community in shock.

Prosper later revealed that he had intended to commit acts of necrophilia with Giselle's corpse, but his mother waking up foiled his plans. After committing the murders, he attempted to hide from law enforcement, remaining in the vicinity for about two hours before ultimately turning himself in when he spotted a police car. He was arrested around 11:50 AM, approximately 600 meters from the crime scene, where officers discovered the loaded shotgun and 33 rounds hidden in nearby bushes.

The Court Proceedings

Nicholas Prosper was charged with three counts of murder, purchasing or acquiring a shotgun without a certificate, possession of a shotgun, and possession of a bladed article in a public place. Disturbingly, indecent images of children were also found on his phone, but due to the severity of the other charges, he was not charged in relation to them.

During his initial court appearance, his father, Ray Prosper, expressed his love for his son, stating, "I still love you, son. It’s not your fault, OK?" This poignant moment underscored the complexity of the situation, as families often struggle to reconcile their love for their children with the horrific actions they may commit.

On February 24, 2025, Nicholas Prosper pleaded guilty to all charges at Luton Crown Court. His sentencing took place on March 19, 2025, where Judge Mrs. Justice Cheema-Grubb condemned Prosper's actions. She described the details of the case as "chilling," emphasizing that he sought notoriety akin to infamous mass shooters. The judge noted that his planning was "cold, deliberate and without sympathy or emotion towards the actual victims or potential victims," highlighting the utter lack of remorse shown by Prosper.

Mrs. Justice Cheema-Grubb stated that, despite Prosper's autism diagnosis, it did not significantly affect his decision-making. She articulated the horror experienced by the victims in their final moments, saying, "Each victim suffered the anguish of anticipating or being aware of the deaths of others." She explained her decision to impose a minimum term rather than a whole-life sentence, noting that "a minimum term does not in any way equate to the value of the life of a murder victim, still less three such victims."

A Community in Mourning

The murders have left a profound impact on the Luton community, which has been grappling with the tragedy and its implications. In a heartfelt statement following the sentencing, the family of the victims expressed their desire for Juliana, Kyle, and Giselle to be remembered for who they truly were. Juliana was portrayed as a strong, loving mother devoted to her four children, while Kyle was described as a kind and talented young man with a passion for football and boxing. Giselle was remembered as a caring girl with an infectious smile and exceptional academic abilities.

This case has reignited discussions surrounding mental health, gun control, and the alarming rise of violent ideation among youth. The United Kingdom has not experienced a school shooting since the Dunblane massacre in 1996, making the recent events even more shocking. However, the rise in unsuccessful plots has raised concerns about the potential for future violence.

Conclusion

The case of Nicholas Prosper serves as a grim reminder of the potential for violence that can lie beneath the surface of seemingly ordinary lives. As communities strive to understand the factors contributing to such horrific acts, it is essential to focus on prevention and support systems for at-risk individuals. The memories of Juliana, Kyle, and Giselle must be honored, and efforts must be made to ensure that no other family has to endure the same pain and loss. This tragic event underscores the need for greater awareness and proactive measures to address the underlying issues that lead to such violence, ensuring that future generations can live free from the threat of similar tragedies.

Giselle Prosper [13] (left), Juliana Prosper [48] (centre), Kyle Prosper [16] (right) found dead in a flat in Luton, Leabank, on Friday 13 September 2024. Pic: family pics issued via Bedfordshire police

Julie was a devoted and nurturing mother to her four children, who were the center of her universe. Kyle was a compassionate and witty young man with a deep passion for football and boxing. He demonstrated considerable talent and held great promise for the future. Giselle was an exceptional young girl, known for her radiant spirit and contagious smile. She excelled in her studies and was deeply valued by her peers. Rest in peace to these sweet angels.♡

[demphen]

the hewitts (and eddie!) after the 1973 massacre

(here are eddie and thomas; context and full drawing below!)

in the novelization of the 2003 movie, it’s said that the fbi mishandled everything surrounding the 1973 massacre. the government declares thomas hewitt dead and makes no mention of his family—so it can be assumed that they’re legally dead too. this is in part due to negligence and also malpractice, as everyone involved just wanted to get the case done and over with. in 1981, the hewitts’ farmhouse is bulldozed over and the basement is filled with cement. erin hardesty is sent to a mental asylum, and the baby she saved is put into the foster care system.

obviously, the police didn’t kill thomas. everyone else aside from charlie came out of the massacre (relatively) unscathed. if that’s the case, where did they go? here’s what i’m thinking!

note: this is all pretty self-indulgent and made-up by me! this is just how i choose to continue the story.

so the hewitts are left with absolutely nothing after erin escapes. no money, no home, and clothes other than those on their back. this fact doesn’t really change when you add eddie into the story. in fact, erin gets into a fight with him while in the basement and ends up shooting his left pinky and ring finger off! so fun!

they’d be on the road for a long, long time afterwards, homeless and just trying to survive. i figure that they could’ve taken two vans (they had taken a lot of cars from victims over the years, after all) and lived in them during this time, fleeing the state. they’d be starving again, and i think that’d send them back into this constant state of intense stress, like the one they were in before the killing started.

luckily, eddie would have connections to people that create false identification. prior to meeting the family, eddie had a fake i.d. made with the name “jackson hughes”—the same people who provided him with that i.d. would offer falsified birth certificates and SSNs too. this would cost a lot of money, however, so i imagine the family spent a long while lying, stealing, and begging all across the country to gather it all up. of course i’ve never gone through the process of being declared legally dead and buying a new identity in the 1970s, so i have no idea how much it would cost exactly, but let’s just say it takes three years to save up all the money.

so by 1976, the hewitt family legally does not exist anymore, having been killed off and forgotten. that same year, the “howard” family moves to the small, rural town of elksville, wyoming. here are all the name changes i came up with! (for the hewitts who don’t have canon middle names, i made those up too) (can you tell i took on a lot of creative liberty here)

thomas brown hewitt → raymond “ray” paul howard

luda mae hewitt → evelyn ann howard

montgomery “monty” lee hewitt → ernest john howard

kathryn ann hewitt → noelle helen howard

henrietta louise hewitt → virginia “ginny” lynn howard

jedidiah paul hewitt → william lee howard

eddie amar reid → eugene joseph roberts

i actually don’t think the family would fully go back to their cannibalistic, murderous schemes. without hoyt there, and after all they’d experienced, i think luda mae (who was already the head of the family before, but would now have the final say over everything) would just want to be left alone? having her first son die would really take a toll on her, i think. perhaps she’d see it as god himself coming down and trying to teach her a lesson by taking charlie away from her (and taking thomas’ arm, too). so she’d order that the family just keep to themselves. “this is our chance to start anew.”

don’t be fooled, though. none of the “howards” are normal folk. i feel that they’d have an eerie reputation among their small number of neighbors, especially since they’re known for being aggressive with trespassers (i can see them having “TRESPASSERS WILL BE SHOT” signs on their fence). “eugene”, their “family friend”, would be the only one consisently seen around town, making minimal social interaction with other people. even he seems… strange, when you look at him. most folks choose to keep their distance.

design/character details:

eddie would cut his hair and grow out his facial hair in an attempt to separate himself from his identity as the rockstar killer. he's a much calmer person now, sort of more grown up? mellowed out? he still deals with violent urges, but he's more restrained. he takes his anger out on trespassers.

thomas grows his hair wayyy out to better obscure his face, since he can't wear masks anymore. i debated giving him facial hair, and settled on a patchy mustache and absolutely no beard hair. as a character, i think thomas would become so much more tired. for the first couple years, he'd be quicker to anger/frustrate. with the second chance his family's been given, he doesn't really want to interact with anyone from the outside world. he's done with it.

hope you all enjoy this i've been Thinking about it for a while........ buh bye!!!

[primnroses]

Can you make a list of the rank of K11/12 and the other characters? could you include characters in boruto too thank you.

First of all, sorry for taking so long, this ask is extremely old. Please read it on AO3 because it has more pictures and it's more comfortable. Tell me if I forgot anyone.

NARUTO/BORUTO CHARACTERS NINJA RANKS ACCORDING TO OFFICIAL SOURCES.

All available information about these characters is official and has been published by Studio Pierrot, Viz Media, Shueisha and their Jump magazines in their anime, manga, databook and novels.

It doesn’t include third party information, retailer sold items, leaks or potential fake information. Please read the end of the post for clarification.

• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •

Before I begin, let’s consider the ninja ranks and the promotion system:

Academy Students undergo a final exam where they have to perform a basic ninjutsu technique. In the case of the Rookies, it was a clone technique.

After passing the exam they get put in a genin team and go through a Genin Certification Exam carried out by their assigned jōnin team leader. For example, Team 7’s was the bell test. If they fail, they are sent back to the Ninja Academy.

Genins (下忍) complete the countless missions, large and small, that constantly pour into the village and would never been completed without their aid.

When their leader considers they are eligible for promotion, they participate in the Chūnin Exams, which happen twice a year, to test if they have the capabilities to lead a team. 

Chūnins (中忍) are in the center of the ranking, but their abilities require them to lead small shinobi teams of shinobi and to have good judgement as commanders. Skilled chūnin usually monitor the Chūnin Exams or lead other teams outside the battlefield.

If one of these chūnin is particularly adept in one area, they could be appointed to Tokubetsu/Special Jōnin (特別上忍) and be asked to lead entire village departments.

On the other hand if one of these chūnin has reached elite skills, they could be appointed to Jōnin (上忍) and complete the most difficult missions by themselves, or even instruct genin teams. Jōnins are also expected to command military divisions, and they are represented by the Jōnin Commander.

Any shinobi eligible for the Kage (影) title is or are selected by the village Council, a group consisting of the heads/leaders of ANBU and Medical Department, the Jōnin Commander and the daimyō of the country. The candidate is later approved by the Jōnin Council.

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The Academy graduation and Chūnin promotion ages are stated in the third databook.

Due to Tumblr's image limit, I will only share the last piece of evidence about their rank or the first piece of evidence for Jōnins as their rank does not change later.

Remember you can purchase all four databooks, Retsu no Sho (Blank Period databook) and Zai no Sho (Boruto databook) online to fact check yourself, but I will leave links to online scans.

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Naruto Uzumaki (Genin/Kage):

He graduated from the Ninja Academy at 12 and became a genin member of Team 7. He didn’t get a promotion due to leaving Konoha before the second Chūnin Exams, unlike his classmates.

He is a genin in the first, second, third, fourth databook and Retsu no Sho.

Officially, Naruto is a genin and recognized as one until the time he was appointed Kage of Konoha between the Blank Period and Boruto: Naruto the Movie.

Scan from Zai no Sho, he is Hokage (火影).

In an interview from Boruto: Naruto the Movie in 2015, Masashi Kishimoto confirmed that Naruto was never promoted to either chūnin or jōnin before he was named Kage. 

You can find the interview here.

Studio Pierrot wrote a filler episode during the end of Naruto Shippūden where Naruto was encouraged to study in order to be promoted to the next ranks before being allowed to become Kage. The animation studio is infamous for coming ahead of manga pace or author statements and writing nonsense. 

In Boruto: Naruto Next Generations episode 48, Naruto confirmed that he had never been promoted and is indeed considered a genin.

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Sasuke Uchiha (Genin/No rank/Nukenin):

He graduated from the Ninja Academy at 12 and became a genin member of Team 7. He didn’t get a promotion due to going rogue before the second Chūnin Exams, unlike his classmates, so Konoha no longer considers Sasuke as a ninja.

In the third, fourth databook and Retsu no Sho, Sasuke’s rank appears blank and is considered to be a rogue ninja/nukenin.

Scan from Zai no Sho, he is - .

In an interview from Boruto: Naruto the Movie in 2015, Masashi Kishimoto confirmed that Sasuke was never promoted to either chūnin or jōnin before he was branded as a rogue ninja/nukenin. 

You can find the interview here.

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Sakura Haruno (Jōnin):

She graduated from the Ninja Academy at 12 and became a genin member of Team 7.

After the failure of her generation’s first Chūnin Exams, she participated in a second examination and was promoted to chūnin at 14 with the rest of her generation, a rank she maintained until the manga ended and the story continued in future projects written by Masashi Kishimoto.

In the third and fourth databooks she is a Chūnin (中忍).

Between the ages of 17 and 19, after the Fourth Shinobi World War and before the Blank Period, Sakura became the only one of Konoha’s kunoichi to be promoted to jōnin, and second of her generation after Temari. She was promoted together with Shikamaru Nara.

First picture: Scan from Retsu no Sho, she is Jōnin (上忍). Second picture: Scan from Zai no Sho, she is a Jōnin (上忍).

In Boruto: Naruto Next Generations, it is also reiterated in episode 171 despite being a known fact.

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Sai (Chūbu):

He graduated from the Ninja Academy at 9, became a chūnin at age 10 and as a member of ANBU Root, became an ANBU, a rank he maintained until the manga ended and the story continued in future projects written by Masashi Kishimoto.

Scan from the third databook, he is ANBU (暗部). Also in the fourth.

Between the ages of 17 and 19, after the Fourth Shinobi World War and before the Blank Period, Sai was demoted and became a chūbu, however this rank is exclusive to him and does not belong to the official shinobi rank system. Chūbu means something like “aid branch”.

First picture: Scan from Retsu no Sho, he is Chūbu (柱部). Second picture: Scan from Zai no Sho, he is a Chūbu (柱部).

Note: Despite being the Chief of ANBU, his rank has never been addressed, so he is a chūbu despite seniority within the organization. Chūbu must be a rank inferior to jōnin and superior to tokubetsu/special jōnin, otherwise he would be named jōnin.

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Neji Hyūga (Jōnin):

He graduated from the Ninja Academy at 12 and became a genin member of Team 3. After the failure of his class’ second Chūnin Exams, he participated in a second examination and was promoted to chūnin at 15 with the rest of his generation (remember Team 3 are one year older than the rookies).

Between the ages of 15 and 17, during Naruto Shippūden or Naruto part II, Neji was the first shinobi of his class and Konoha’s generation to be promoted to jōnin, and the only one of his generation with Suna’s Kankurō.

Scan from the third databook, he is Jōnin (上忍)

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Rock Lee (Jōnin):

He graduated from the Ninja Academy at 12 and became a genin member of Team 3. After the failure of his class’ second Chūnin Exams, he participated in a second examination and was promoted to chūnin at 15 with the rest of his generation, a rank he maintained until the manga ended and the story continued in future projects written by Masashi Kishimoto.

In the third, fourth databooks and Retsu no Sho he is a Chūnin (中忍).

Between the ages of 17 and 33, after the Blank Period and before Boruto: Naruto the Movie, Rock Lee was the second shinobi of his class and fourth in Konoha’s generation to be promoted to jōnin after Neji Hyūga, Sakura Haruno and Shikamaru Nara.

First picture: Scan from Retsu no Sho, he is Chūnin (中忍). Second picture: Scan from Zai no Sho, he is Jōnin (上忍).

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Tenten (Chūnin):

She graduated from the Ninja Academy at 12 and became a genin member of Team 3. After the failure of his class’ second Chūnin Exams, she participated in a second examination and was promoted to chūnin at 15 with the rest of her generation, a rank she maintained until the manga ended and the story continued in future projects written by Masashi Kishimoto.

In the third and fourth databooks she is a Chūnin (中忍).

Due to her last rank data being in the Blank Period and not being shown in the Zai no Sho databook, and the lack of information in the anime, manga, databooks, novels or official material published by Studio Pierrot, Tenten’s rank remains to be chūnin and she was never promoted.

Scan from Retsu no Sho, she is Chūnin (中忍). She does not appear in Zai no Sho.

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Shino Aburame (Chūnin):

He graduated from the Ninja Academy at 12 and became a genin member of Team 8. After the failure of his generation’s first Chūnin Exams, he participated in a second examination and was promoted to chūnin at 14 with the rest of his generation, a rank he maintained until the manga ended and the story continued in future projects written by Masashi Kishimoto.

In the third and fourth databooks he is a Chūnin (中忍).

Due to his last rank data being in the Blank Period and not being shown in the Zai no Sho databook, and the lack of information in the anime, manga, databooks, novels or official material published by Studio Pierrot, Shino’s rank remains to be chūnin and he was never promoted.

Scan from Retsu no Sho, he is Chūnin (中忍). He does not appear in Zai no Sho.

Note: The settei circulating from a Japanese manga shop that listed Shino as jōnin is an old draft from Studio Pierrot that never made it to the story and is information never made public by the animation studio in any book or material, that is why people who have come across it said it was "by accident" and that is "very difficult to find". Mandarake is a retail shop that purchases items from anime studios and animators and sells them, in other words, animators sell their portfolio and Mandarake sells them in a pack. Several anime drafts displayed by this shop have also never made the final cut in the anime, like the family chart that listed Tenten and Rock Lee as divorcees or other stills from the Boruto: Naruto the Movie. Furthermore, the anime confirmed in episode 6 that "Shino sensei has jōnin-level skills", not that he's a jōnin, meaning he is a chūnin with jōnin-level skills (Academy teachers are chūnin), more confirmation that they discarded the chart but at one point they considered giving him an anime-only promotion (but decided against it). There are currently no manga panels, anime episodes, novels or databook sources that hint the chart is canon. Shino is a chūnin according to all official and available sources.

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Kiba Inuzuka (Chūnin):

He graduated from the Ninja Academy at 12 and became a genin member of Team 8. After the failure of his generation’s first Chūnin Exams, he participated in a second examination and was promoted to chūnin at 14 with the rest of his generation, a rank he maintained until the manga ended and the story continued in future projects written by Masashi Kishimoto.

In the third and fourth databooks he is a Chūnin (中忍).

Due to his last rank data being in the Blank Period and not being shown in the Zai no Sho databook, and the lack of information in the anime, manga, databooks, novels or official material published by Studio Pierrot, Kiba’s rank remains to be chūnin and he was never promoted.

Scan from Retsu no Sho, he is Chūnin (中忍). He does not appear in Zai no Sho.

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Hinata Hyūga (Chūnin):

She graduated from the Ninja Academy at 12 and became a genin member of Team 8. After the failure of her generation’s first Chūnin Exams, she participated in a second examination and was promoted to chūnin at 14 with the rest of her generation, a rank she maintained until the manga ended and the story continued in future projects written by Masashi Kishimoto.

In the third and fourth databooks she is a Chūnin (中忍).

After the age of 17, Hinata retired a chūnin and has lived as a common housewife according to Naruto Shinden and Naruto Retsuden.

First picture: Scan from Retsu no Sho, she is Chūnin (中忍). Second picture: Scan from Zai no Sho, she is a Chūnin (中忍).

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Shikamaru Nara (Jōnin):

He graduated from the Ninja Academy at 12 and became a genin member of Team 10. After the failure of his generation’s first Chūnin Exams, he was promoted to chūnin at age 13, the only shinobi to achieve it, a rank he maintained until the manga ended and the story continued in future projects written by Masashi Kishimoto.

In the third and fourth databooks he is a Chūnin (中忍).

Between the ages of 17 and 19, after the Fourth Shinobi World War and before the Blank Period, Shikamaru became the first shinobi of his class and second in Konoha’s generation to be promoted to jōnin after Neji Hyūga. He was promoted together with Sakura Haruno.

First picture: Scan from Retsu no Sho, he is Jōnin (上忍). Second picture: Scan from Zai no Sho, he is a Jōnin (上忍).

Currently, from Boruto: Two Blue Vortex chapter 1, Shikamaru is the acting Eighth Hokage.

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Chōji Akimichi (Chūnin):

He graduated from the Ninja Academy at 12 and became a genin member of Team 10. After the failure of his generation’s first Chūnin Exams, he participated in a second examination and was promoted to chūnin at 14 with the rest of his generation, a rank he maintained until the manga ended and the story continued in future projects written by Masashi Kishimoto.

In the third and fourth databooks he is a Chūnin (中忍).

Due to his last rank data being in the Blank Period and not being shown in the Zai no Sho databook, and the lack of information in the anime, manga, databooks, novels or official material published by Studio Pierrot, Chōji’s rank remains to be chūnin and he was never promoted.

Scan from Retsu no Sho, he is Chūnin (中忍). He does not appear in Zai no Sho.

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Ino Yamanaka (Chūnin):

She graduated from the Ninja Academy at 12 and became a genin member of Team 10. After the failure of her generation’s first Chūnin Exams, she participated in a second examination and was promoted to chūnin at 14 with the rest of her generation, a rank she maintained until the manga ended and the story continued in future projects written by Masashi Kishimoto.

In the third and fourth databooks she is a Chūnin (中忍).

Due to her last rank data being in the Blank Period and not being shown in the Zai no Sho databook, and the lack of information in the anime, manga, databooks, novels or official material published by Studio Pierrot, Ino’s rank remains to be chūnin and she was never promoted.

Scan from Retsu no Sho, she is Chūnin (中忍) although the quality is bad. She does not appear in Zai no Sho.

Note: The settei circulating from a Japanese manga shop that listed Ino as jōnin is an old draft from Studio Pierrot that never made it to the story and is information never made public by the animation studio in any book or material, that is why people who have come across it said it was "by accident" and that is "very difficult to find". Mandarake is a retail shop that purchases items from anime studios and animators and sells them, in other words, animators sell their portfolio and Mandarake sells them in a pack. Several anime drafts displayed by this shop have also never made the final cut in the anime, like the family chart that listed Tenten and Rock Lee as divorcees or other stills from the Boruto: Naruto the Movie. Furthermore, the anime confirmed in episode 6 that "Shino sensei has jōnin-level skills", not that he's a jōnin, meaning he is a chūnin with jōnin-level skills, more confirmation that they discarded the chart but at one point they considered giving them an anime-only promotion (but decided against it). Chūnins are team leaders. There are currently no manga panels, anime episodes, novels or databook sources that hint the chart is canon. Ino is a chūnin according to all official and available sources.

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Gaara (Chūnin/Kage):

He graduated from the Ninja Academy at 12 and became a genin member of Team Baki. After the failure of his generation’s first Chūnin Exams, he participated in a second examination and was promoted to chūnin at 14 with the rest of his generation.

Between the ages of 14 and 16, Gaara was named Fifth Kazekage, a rank he maintained until the manga ended and the story continued in future projects written by Masashi Kishimoto. It was never confirmed whether he also obtained the promotion to jōnin.

In the third and fourth databooks he is Kazekage (風影).

First picture: Scan from third databook, he is Kazekage (風影). Second picture: Scan from Retsu no Sho, he is Kazekage (風影).

He is also a Kazekage (風影) in Zai no Sho (see other Kage below).

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Kankurō (Jōnin):

He graduated from the Ninja Academy at 12 and became a genin member of Team Baki. After the failure of his generation’s first Chūnin Exams, he participated in a second examination and was promoted to chūnin at 16 with the rest of his generation. 

Between the ages of 16 and 18, during Naruto Shippūden or Naruto part II, Kankurō was promoted to jōnin with Temari and became the only one to become one with Konoha’s Neji Hyūga, a rank he maintained until the manga ended and the story continued in future projects written by Masashi Kishimoto.

In the third and fourth databooks he is a Jōnin (上忍).

Scan from the third databook, he is Jōnin (上忍). He does not appear in Retsu no Sho or Zai no Sho.

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Temari (Jōnin):

She graduated from the Ninja Academy at 12 and became a genin member of Team Baki. After the failure of his generation’s first Chūnin Exams, she participated in a second examination and was promoted to chūnin at 17 with the rest of her generation. 

Between the ages of 17 and 19, during Naruto Shippūden or Naruto part II, Temari was promoted to jōnin with Kankurō and became the first kunoichi of her generation to become one, a rank she maintained until the manga ended and the story continued in future projects written by Masashi Kishimoto.

In the third and fourth databooks she is a Jōnin (上忍).

First picture: Scan from the third databook, she is Jōnin (上忍). Second picture: Scan from Retsu no Sho, she is Jōnin (上忍). She does not appear in Zai no Sho.

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Karui (Chūnin):

She graduated from the Ninja Academy at an unknown age and became a genin. At the time of her debut in Naruto Shippūden or Naruto part II, she was a chūnin at age 16, a rank she maintained until the manga ended and the story continued in future projects written by Masashi Kishimoto.

Due to her last rank data being in the fourth databook and not being shown in the Retsu no Sho and Zai no Sho, and the lack of information in the anime, manga, databooks, novels or official material published by Studio Pierrot, Karui’s rank remains to be chūnin and she was never promoted.

Scan from the fourth databook, she is Chūnin (中忍).

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Omoi (Jōnin):

He graduated from the Ninja Academy at an unknown age and became a genin. At the time of his debut in Naruto Shippūden or Naruto part II, he was a chūnin at age 16, a rank he maintained until the manga ended and the story continued in future projects written by Masashi Kishimoto.

In Boruto: Naruto Next Generations episode 166, it was said that a group of jōnin from Kumogakure confronted Deepa, Omoi being one of them. This could imply that Omoi was promoted to jōnin between the ages of 17 and 32. 

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Hanabi Hyūga (Jōnin):

She graduated from the Ninja Academy at an unknown age and was a genin at the age of 14 during the Blank Period. 

In Boruto: Naruto Next Generations she is given a genin team, so she must have been at least a Tokubetsu Jōnin in order to become a sensei.

In the second Boruto novel written by Ukyō Kodachi, she is confirmed to be a Jōnin (上忍).

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Konohamaru Sarutobi, Udon Ise and Moegi Kazamatsuri (Jōnin):

They graduated from the Ninja Academy at an unknown age and was a genin at the age of 12 during Naruto Shippūden or Naruto part II, a rank he maintained until the manga ended and the story continued in future projects written by Masashi Kishimoto.

In Naruto Gaiden character descriptions, they are all described as Jōnin (上忍).

Konohamaru is described as a Jōnin (上忍) in Zai no Sho.

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Kurotsuchi (Jōnin/Kage):

She graduated from the Ninja Academy at an unknown age and became a genin. At the time of her debut in Naruto Shippūden or Naruto part II, she was a jōnin at age 18. She was already a Kage when the manga ended and the story continued in future projects written by Masashi Kishimoto.

Between the ages of 18 and 33, after Naruto Shippūden or Naruto part II and Boruto: Naruto the Movie, Kurotsuchi had become the Third Tsuchikage.

Chōjūro (Jōnin/Kage):

He graduated from the Ninja Academy at an unknown age and became a genin. At the time of her debut in Naruto Shippūden or Naruto part II, he was a jōnin at age 19. He was already a Kage when the manga ended and the story continued in future projects written by Masashi Kishimoto.

Between the ages of 19 and 34, after Naruto Shippūden or Naruto part II and Boruto: Naruto the Movie, Chōjūro had become the Sixth Mizukage.

Darui (Jōnin/Kage):

He graduated from the Ninja Academy at an unknown age and became a genin. At the time of her debut in Naruto Shippūden or Naruto part II, he was a jōnin at age 26. He was already a Kage when the manga ended and the story continued in future projects written by Masashi Kishimoto.

Between the ages of 26 and 41, after Naruto Shippūden or Naruto part II and Boruto: Naruto the Movie, Darui had become the Fifth Raikage.

Scan from Zai no Sho, they are all Kage (影) of their respective villages.

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Katasuke Tōno (Tokubetsu/Special Jōnin):

At the time of his debut in Boruto: Naruto the Movie, he was a Jōnin (上忍). 

However, the writer of the Boruto manga at the time, Ukyō Kodachi, changed his rank and demoted him to Tokubetsu/Special Jōnin (特別上忍) in chapter 11.

First picture: Scan from Zai no Sho, he is Jōnin (上忍). Second picture: chapter 11, demoted to Tokubetsu/Special Jōnin (特別上忍).

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Other characters’ ranks who appear in Boruto have not changed:

Kakashi Hatake and Tsunade are former Kage (影).

Might Guy and Kurenai are still Jōnin (上忍).

Ibiki Morino is still a Tokubetsu/Special Jōnin (特別上忍)

Iruka Umino and Mirai Sarutobi are still Chūnin (中忍).

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Before anybody comments saying that some characters must have had their ranks updated because it has been a while since it was mentioned (their rank status), remember that the anime, manga, novels and databooks constantly change ranks of characters or simply reminds the viewers of ranks.

Katasuke Tōno debuted as a jōnin and was demoted to tokubetsu/special jōnin in the manga.  

Omoi was a chūnin in Naruto and was later mentioned in a team of jōnin in the anime.

Naruto Uzumaki confirmed his genin rank in the anime.

Sakura Haruno has been a jōnin since Zai no Sho, Retsu no Sho and the anime.

Shikamaru Nara has been a jōnin since Zai no Sho, Retsu no Sho and he is now a Kage in the manga.

Shino Aburame was confirmed to retain his rank of chūnin despite being a jōnin level.

Rock Lee and Konohamaru Sarutobi had their promotions in Zai no Sho.

Ibiki Morino has been a tokubetsu jōnin since Naruto and confirmed again in the anime.

Moegi Kazamatsuri and Udon Ise had their promotions in Naruto Gaiden.

Hanabi Hyūga had her promotion in the second Boruto novel plus she has a genin team.

If the rank from any character in the list has not been mentioned in the anime, manga, databooks or novels it means their rank has not changed. Any chart form sources not affiliated to Studio Pierrot or Shueisha are not canon. If a character's new rank is not explicitly stated, it is not up to the fandom to scout the internet to find clues. All canon and information that Shueisha and Studio Pierrot want to release, will be released by them.