#eyebags dark circles expression & all

[levinbolts]

[ellievickstar]

Sinner's Sacrifice

A/N: Here's part 2 of Bloodied Bonds , i'm going for alliteration in the title hahah. it's a lot shorter than the first part i wish i made it longer but i feel like i was stretching it out i know i know it sucks to wait for parts i really wanted it to only be two parts long but i really had a "my story has it's own ideas" moment T^T. I'm so so sorry towards anyone who thought this would be the last part I can assure you I thought that too. I hope you enjoy <3

Summary: As Azriel struggles to navigate a situation where he could lose you no matter what he chooses, take a look into his own heart.

Pairing: Azriel x Reader, Rhysand x Sister!Reader

Warnings: Elain slander, dying, self-sacrificing thoughts

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Azriel had lost count of how many hours it had been since he had threatened to eventually murder Elain.

And he was losing damned mind.

Every single day he had sat in the chair beside your sleeping form….you were breathing, which was an improvement from the heaving and choking in your sleep that alarmed Madja enough to order the inner circle to start taking turns watching over you. Madja believed that your condition improved because he was finally turning away from Elain, but that was what the bond sensed. Without your mind, your own belief to ensure your heart, your condition was bound to deteriorate again.

And yet you could not wake up so he could explain.

So he could apologise.

So he could beg for your forgiveness.

Everyday without making the decision to let Madja just remove the roots of the flowers seemed like a gamble, but after what had been discovered, what Cassian had caught Elain doing, the entire inner circle was not sure if it would be better to let your relationship go, or let you go.

Both scenarios, Azriel would lose.

In both situations, Azriel would lose you forever and a part of him felt like maybe he deserved it. If you ever woke up, ever wanted revenge to make him feel guilty for what had been done, regardless the fact that it had been out of his control, you would have gotten it in spades when he realised that his ignorance, his belief that he could help just one more person, his blindness to the Elain’s darkness, had caused him a situation that would cost him no matter what he did.

And in that, all he could do daily was hold your hand, and weep.

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“Go shower Azriel. It’s been three days,” Cassian said softly. The shadowsinger merely moved his head to gaze at his friend who leaned against the door frame. Not out of habit but because he genuinely needed the support. Azriel saw the eyebags under Cassian’s eyes, his tired exhausted expression not far from the one Azriel wore.

When Azriel simply shook his head, bringing his gaze back to his mate, not wanting to move another muscle, Cassian groaned.

“Azriel she won’t die within the time it takes you to take a quick bath, please, you need it,” However, Azriel once again did not move, this time not even deigning Cassian a response. The latter simply sighed before making his way towards Rhys’s office, pushing the door open to see Rhysand surrounded by various books, piles of them in the corner, some of them discarded with pages torn out.

“Rhys…?” Cassian knocked on the slightly ajar door.

Violet eyes met Cassian’s hazel ones and Rhys simply let out a breath before standing, checking the time by glancing at the window behind him, “Ah…it’s dark….I did not notice,” He simply stated awkwardly, moving to gather up some of the books from his desk, no doubt to bring it with him to his and Feyre’s room to further study until the waking hours of the next morning.

It broke Cassian’s heart to see his brothers in such a state.

Broke his own heart to see you lying there completely unconscious, every few days needing Madja to extract flowers from your throat.

The women of the house had isolated themselves to their own rooms. Mor came to your room every few hours to check on you however she stayed in her room surrounded by a similar book pile as Rhys, trying to consult her own oracles of truth to see if they had any answers. Amren had gone over to the summer court with Varian to see if they had any records that the Night Court did not, Nesta looked through the libraries with the priestesses, passing anything she found that may be useful to Feyre who scanned through them.

All this and nothing.

They had come up short.

Contacting Thesan, Helion, even Tamlin to see if there was any connections of the disease to the spring court, had come to nothing. No answers. No solutions.

Finally, as Cassian rounded the corner of the house he entered the room they had been keeping Elain in. There she was chained to the ground staring at the wall. For a moment Cassian would have felt bad for how hollow she looked, however his guilt was quickly swallowed by the anger he felt for what she had done to cause your current state.

“I see how you can help her…” Elain suddenly said, her eyes flitting to Cassian, “When minds connect, when you travel through souls,” She hummed before continuing to fiddle with the hem of her dress. Her cheeks were sunken in and hollow, her eyes now held a sharp and piercing stare instead of the soft glint. For once, Elain Archeron’s true colours were on full display.

At her words however, Cassian froze, his tone dropping to a dangerous timbre, “Do you know how to save Y/N,” Elain hummed, “I’ll tell you….for a price.”

“Do you really think that you are in a position to bargain?”

“She’s running out of time isn’t she?”

Cassian bit down on his tongue, hard. Storming out of the room he slammed the door shut, letting out a pained and frustrated roar.

Elain knew. Or at least there was a possibility that she knew. However, her calm demeanour and unflinching attitude showed Cassian no signs of lies. She knew how to save you but she wanted something out of it.

With a silent prayer, Cassian swore to himself he’d find the way to save you even if he had to pry it out of the memories in Elain’s dead body.

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“So she knows how to save my sister,” Rhys confirmed, Cassian nodded, “That’s what she claims. If she’s lying then she’s damned good at it, however she’s suggesting a bargain, I didn’t pry into the details she was thinking of.”

Not without Rhysand himself present.

Not without Azriel.

The three brothers looked at each other, Azriel’s hand was holding yours, had been holding yours since Rhysand and Cassian had come into the room saying that they had something to discuss.

“We should ask her what she wants,” Azriel muttered softly, his voice hoarse and raspy from not using it for a while.

“And if she asks for your hand?” Cassian challenged, “Then we’ll find a way to break the bargain like how Feyre and Rhysand did, but for now our focus is to save her.”

It was then Rhysand recognised his brother for once after all this time, the shadow singer who would do anything to keep you safe, the self-sacrificing spy master who would sacrifice himself, his choices just to save you.

“Let’s go then,” Rhysand concluded, standing from his stool, Cassian pushed off the wall he had been leaning against and Azriel graced the back of your hand with a soft kiss before standing, casting you one last glance before following his brothers out. Nesta replaced Azriel’s position on the stool, promising the shadow singer to keep watch of you until he returned.

Following his brothers down the hallway, Azriel’s mind flooded with memories of sneaking down these halls to get away with you, memories of coming home and seeing you in the hallway, collapsing into your loving arms. Thoughts of your love and you consumed him and he shuddered under the weight of his own grief.

He could not lose you.

He would not lose you.

And so as Azriel stepped into the room of Elain’s captivity, levelling her with a glare, inside Azriel knew that he would sacrifice anything just to hold you.

Part 3 is here!!

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A/N: please reply if you want to be tagged in part 3 people tagged in part 2 will not be tagged again in part 3 unless they ask in replies. Thank you <3

Azriel taglist: @kemillyfreitas @going-through-shit @chessebookgirl @helloworlditsmesblo (please ask if you want to be added to AZRIEL'S taglist - this is NOT the same as part 3 taglist)

[fuckingstrange]

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Quieting Down

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WARNINGS: Mean!Bau Team (apologies fr), Anxious & Upset Spencer, Brief mentions of insecurity, non-beta read

WORDS: 1,195

PAIRING: S.R. x gn!reader

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Spencer has been quite.. off, recently. He's been more reserved and quiet, and while the team has started seeming to almost praise him for it, you can't help but be concerned. Especially because you see things that they don't after the work day.

You see him at home. Where he remains reserved, unlike normal. He doesn't talk to you much, usually responding with a head nod or a light shake, sometimes with one word replies. When he does speak and use his voice it's with a tone so timid and the volume of a mouse. It's heartbreaking, really. You miss when he'd ramble, when he'd talk to you and constantly say how much he loves you. You know he still loves you, that much hasn't changed, but you miss his voice.

Right now, you each are walking into the door after a long day at work, the poor man exhausted. He silently slips off his shoes and sets his bag down on the couch before making his way to the kitchen, opening it up and glancing around at the contents. He decides on a simple glass of orange juice, grabbing out the jug and a cup, grabbing a second one and gesturing to you in a silent offer of some.

You give him a light smile and shake your head, walking up to him and resting a hand on his lower back as he pours himself a glass. You put the jug back away in the fridge for him as he goes and settles on the couch, curling up off to the side and watching whatever was on the TV.

You frown at the continued silence, deciding to try and get him to talk, you go over and sit beside him. You lean in, lips near his ear so you can whisper, “Mind if I hold you?”, and wait until he gives a light nod before pulling him to cuddle in with you. You end up holding him in your lap, propped up a bit with a pillow against the arm rest so that he lays at an angle on you.

Spencer’s arms instinctively move to wrap around you, and you don't miss how he seems to melt against you. Your hands move up to play with his hair, lightly stroking it back so you can see his relaxed, yet exhausted expression. After a few minutes of letting him adjust to the change of being home, feeling the slight anxiousness he seems to always hold while at the bureau finally going away, you guide his gaze to meet yours by gently turning his head.

Spencer’s eyes are truly captivating. You could lose yourself in how softly they stare into yours, the dark brown colour making him look so.. adorable. His eyelids almost seem weighed down by the dark eyebags, your free hand moving to rest on his cheek so you can rub the dark circles with your thumb in gentle, soothing movements. He gives you a light smile in return, tilting his head a bit to press a kiss to the inside of your forearm.

You lean forward to press a light kiss to his forehead, leaning back to look back down at him. You hesitate for a couple minutes, debating on whether or not you should ask him why he's suddenly so quiet and nearly refusing to speak because you don't want to possibly trigger or upset him. Though Spencer, managing to have memorized what your microexpressions mean, presses another kiss to the inside of your forearm in a silent reassurance that you're allowed to speak.

You take a deep breath, exhaling and staring into his eyes for a few seconds before mustering up the courage to ask him. “Why have you suddenly.. gone quiet? I've noticed.. I've noticed you're not as talkative as before. You act like a ghost at work. What's with the change?”

While Spencer isn't at all surprised by your question, having expected people to notice his sudden quietness, he didn't expect you to react more concerned than happy. “I just thought.. I needed to shut up a little more, you know? I can be a bit annoying, so I thought this would be.. uh, I thought this would be better.” He responds, his tone still timid and his voice just barely over a whisper.

You swear your heart breaking is an audible sound that echoes through the room. You grab the sides of his head and guide him to sit up with you, feeling his slight anxiousness towards what your response could be. “Spencer.. no, baby.. You don't need to shut up, you never need to shut up. I like your voice, I love your rambles. You're not annoying- Why would you think that?” You can't help but ask, wanting to know if it's been a growing insecurity or something else. His gaze falls from yours, head turning to the side. “Well, the team.. they just kind of.. don't like to listen. It, uh, it makes me feel like my voice is useless.” He explains, squirming a bit. You don't move to stop his motions, letting him look away and watch as he starts to fidget with his hands in his lap, knowing it's his own way of self-soothing when his anxiety feels like it's built up too much. He waits a second before continuing his explanation, his voice just barely louder now that he knows you never wanted him to be quiet. “I know it's stupid but I just thought they'd be happier than if I talked as much as I did, and they are.. I didn't like talking just to be ignored, I.. I, uh, I don't mean to sound rude or anything but it.. kind of hurts to be treated like that.”

His words pull at your heart, the last sentence might as well have even been a straight-up bullet to the chest. You move your thumb to rub his cheek, seeing the saddened and anxious look on his face. “I.. can't say I understand why they're like this either, Spencer, nor do I like that they treat you like this. You're not at fault for getting upset over being ignored, it's rude and you're allowed to be upset. Just like you're allowed to use that voice to talk. Even if they're not listening, I will.” You reassure him, leaning forward to press a light kiss to the side of his forehead.

Spencer ends up turning back to look at you after the kiss, tears resting in his eyes. You wipe them away before pulling him to lay back down with you, pressing another few kisses around his face, pulling a smile from the man. He can’t think of a response, so instead he just melts against you again, happy that somebody cares enough to listen.

You start playing with his hair again, enjoying the way he seems so relaxed, like a weight has been lifted off his shoulders now that he knows you never wanted him to force himself to stop talking. You lean down to press one last kiss to the top of his head before leaning, relaxing against the couch. “I'll always listen.”

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NOTES -

Somebody needs to let this man just full on fucking RANT for hours. Any and all topics, LET HIM SPEAK AND INDULGE IN HIS INTEREST!! (I volunteer as tribute !!)

I'll likely make an angstier version of this

[igetnosleep]

Rekindling

Sequel to "The Night we Met" another attempt at angst. mostly written in Leon's point of view set after RE: 4 remake in mind.

So some TW: Four pages of Leon picking you apart, Leon being needy (If you count that as a warning), thoughts of mutilation (Leon wants to get close to you but is unable to express himself properly), Anger, implied smut (I cannot write smut for the life of me), angst, some comfort but I take it from you.

Six years.

Six years since Leon had last seen you.

It felt so far away the memory of Raccoon City was ingrained into his mind like a brand.

Then they took you away had you relocated far away from him away from anyform of comfort. He wished he could have followed you at that moment and have you in his arms longer.

It felt like decades had passed since he saw you.

He wished he could pour everything out, rip his skin off and have the weight in his chest fall out bloody and ugly, but you couldn’t know that. He had to beg on his knees to make sure you didn’t end up like him. You wouldn’t have survived USSTRATCOM. He barely survived. You would have died.

Mission after mission, saving the president's daughter, the DSO decided to throw him a bone. Reward him for all of his hard work.

Now here he is finally, he gets to see you, standing in front of your apartment door. Not Sherry unfortunately, Simmons wouldn’t let him. “Make up your mind Golden boy, what's it gonna be? Think fast or I’m pulling my offer off the table.” He wanted to kill that man, jaw clenched as he accepted his superior's terms.

He steeled his nerves reaching up and knocking on your door staring hearing a dog barking and the sound of nails tapping against wood floors then scratching and more barking, you had a dog. “Coming!” your voice rang out as you unlocked the door and he was met with a determined pitbull sticking its nose past the door trying to get a feel on him.

You held onto its collar the large puppy with a powder face, sniffing excitedly as its tail whacked your leg. “Noooo don’t run off you’ll get me in trouble again.” You spoke gently, eyes trained on the pup. Slowly you looked up at him and your eyes widened in surprise, like you saw a ghost.

“Leon?” Your voice was confused and unsure. He gave you a small nod, his lip quirked up trying to give you some semblance of comfort. Your grip on your dog loosened giving it the chance to approach him, he offered his hand allowing for a sniff of approval and affectionate licks to his palm.

You had changed a bit, you looked skinnier, unfortunately, he missed the softness in your body even if it was brief how long he’d held you. You looked tired, you hadn’t been sleeping. Why did you look frail? 

You looked at him like you didn’t recognize him, your eyes searching for something, a remnant of him from when you met.  The same man who had left you alone now thinner, cheeks sunken and heavy eyebags and dark circles. Hesitantly you touched his cheek watching him tense before forcing himself still.

Those blue eyes you couldn’t get out of your head dulled and tired. The back of your hand gently smoothed over his cheek and he sighed shoulders drooping, a hint of vulnerability. Leons hand coming up and grabbing yours pressing your hand against his cheek as he took a breath.

He needs more, more than just you touching his cheek. Morbidly he wished he could sink under your skin and feel your warmth, would you mind? Would you mind if he did that? You wouldn’t would you? 

Sink his teeth into your skin and rip your throat out, maybe claw his way into your chest and make a home next to your beating heart.

Your life felt too inviting. Your warmth all too accessible, willing, open for something like him always longing for something.

Then again. There was that fear. Fear of getting too close too fast, seeming all too eager for something more. He’d come out bloody and red staring back at you scared and confused. 

Your voice cut him out of his head. He blinked and hummed a small beckon for you to repeat yourself “Do you want to come in?”

You led him inside pouring both a cup of tea, chamomile, “Helps the nerves..at least that's what the lady down the hall told me.” you spoke almost in a daze, still surprised to see him there. You pour some honey and lemon into both mugs.

Silence felt deafening between the two of you, his eyes trailing the interior of your apartment, the dog lying peacefully on the couch cushions, he never took you for a dog person, the way the carpets seem to overtake the living room, how warm it felt in the apartment despite the air being at the coldest temperature known to man.

“How have you been?” It feels like a stupid question to you, but he knows it’s all you could think of at the moment, you weren’t social you could barely keep eye contact. Were you trying to go back to the night when you looked at him trying to find the puppy you met all those years ago?

It almost felt nice that you were trying to find something to cling to like how he’d started trying to take note of how you lived every detail to how you dressed was something he wanted to write into memory. You were an open book he held the highlighters and pens writing annotations on your pages underlining and highlighting the details that caught his attention.

You could barely peer into him. Leon felt like a blank journal, the cover beautifully decorated yet when opened held nothing, no words or details to keep note of, how he preferred it now, it wasn’t your fault. He reminded you of the ones you collected but never got the chance to use, he seemed torn and frayed, being through too much to know pages torn out secrets hidden between lines and invisible ink. He felt more like the blacked out lines you’d see in a government document. At least in the movies you’d seen but at this point you were sure it was the same.

A part of him felt angry you didn’t immediately know, you couldn’t get a read on him, see what kind of person he was now without feeling like you were intruding. The man in your living room is more of a stranger if anything rather than someone you thought was a friend.

Could you classify what you had as a grounds for friendship?

You hardly knew let alone understood what happened yourself.

Leon barely tried to acknowledge it, finding himself torn between wanting to acknowledge and longing to forget what happened even if it meant forgetting you sometimes.

He almost wanted to scream at you, resentment at the life you were living now like he didn’t make the choice to protect you. 

He bit back a scowl. Glowering from his spot. “Fuck you.” his mind supplied it was terrifying how it felt like it was creeping into his veins, anger, resentment.

You looked small under his gaze, did you regret it? Did you regret meeting him? Were you starting to regret letting him into your home?

He took a deep breath, the aroma of honey and lemon mixed into his cup easing his nerves. He needs to calm down. He’ll scare you if he keeps going on like this. You hadn’t seen him in years. You didn’t even know what he’d done for you. “And you never will.” 

It’s not your fault. It’s not your fault. 

Leon knows better. He’s not his father. You’re not at fault.

“I’m..” he paused, debating telling the truth before shaking his head “I’ve been better.” you bit your tongue. Your cheeks flushed red as you rubbed your forehead. “Sorry..I just..You can’t talk about anything can you?” You were smart peeking into the cracks of his walls. He shook his head “No, sorry.” He looked down, somber hand coming up to rub his forehead. 

You sat in awkward silence, you weren’t used to the bitter tone on his tongue. You didn’t know what to say, what could you say? What could you do? His shoulders looked squared; he was guarded; rigid. 

His eyes narrowed and observed the area, what was he looking for? God fuck who knows something a hint that you had moved on that you were just fine without him. 

Resentment towards you festering in his mind despite him pushing it down but it clung to his gut unwilling to go away. Bitterness coated his tongue. You were scared one wrong move could break him and have him crumble like he was fragile. He wasn’t fucking fragile. “You have something on your mind?” He asked his finger tapping against the mug in his hands impatiently. 

You weren’t stupid, mostly just caught off guard by his behavior. Shifty eyes and rigid body language. Clear indication that he wanted to leave, to go back to wherever he called home.

“Sorry..I guess I’m still surprised to see you..” you apologized for your lack of words, it only proved to make him feel worse.

This meeting felt like a mistake. Everything about it felt wrong. 

Leon placed the mug down on the coffee table as he tapped his knee anxiously. “I should go.” Already getting up and moving towards your front door. You stared at him confused. He wasn't here for maybe a few minutes.

You didn’t want to leave it like this: a wordless exchange of nothing too much simmering under the surface too much needing to be said but fear and reluctance prevented them from being said.

“Leon.” Your voice was gentle trying to pull him away from his head “Are you..feeling up to a hug?” You asked, arms opening up in a curious invitation. 

For a moment he wanted to decline her out before he did something he would regret but he wanted to be selfish. He gave so much and let his superiors take so much of him it felt like there was nothing left to take. 

Just for a moment, let him have something.

Let him have this.

His arms wrapped around your shoulders, hands moving over your back slithering down and locking you in place while your hands hesitantly rest on his waist. Your hands were shaking at the unexpected contact not understanding how quickly he would change his demeanor. 

Leon nuzzled your neck, his hands clutching your shirt for a moment. He felt like he was reliving a good memory. A piece of heaven he thought was locked away from him his hands felt bloody, unclean, clutching your shirt.

You smelled nice. The scent of the soap you used was intoxicating a deep breath and he was ingraining it into his memory, his hands roaming down to your sides then up your shirt, feeling you jolt in surprise “Leon?” You voice surprised but not pushing him away cheeks flushed warm, almost burning feeling lips against your neck.

You pulled away staring at him eyes wide “Push me away. Please say something.” he murmured, his forehead leaning against yours. Your breath mingled with his while his fingers dug into your back pulling you closer with each moment of silence.

Your mind was racing, the sudden change the way he stared at you.

What the fuck?

Holy shit.

You were certain you might blow a fuse or burn out with how he was staring at you. What could you do? Say no? He did say that but the words weren’t forming in your mouth. Your name was rough on his tongue “Please say something.” he whined his voice cracking his hand coming up to cup your cheek his lips brushing against yours as you managed break out of your thoughts staring back into those pretty eyes of his ones you knew you could get lost in staring into for a long time if he allowed it.

“Keep going.” You gently urged your hand going over his thumb brushing over the back of his hand. He could get used to that feeling. His eyes darted down nudging your nose as he murmured, asking gently “Can I?” a small pause and you nodded allowing him to continue.

His lips were chapped desperate over yours. Your hands on his cheeks as you moved your mouth clumsily against his. “Bedroom?” he asked clumsily, he felt like a rookie again, legs wobbly as he guided you to where you spent your nights and mornings wrapped up in nothing but peace.

Need and desperation were the two emotions he felt during that moment. Being able to hold you to bring you close to the feeling you wrapped around him, his nails digging and clawing into your skin begging to be let in to be a part of your life without the blood and the fear, without the constant mockery or over reliance of his skills.

The morning after it was like he’d slept for the first time in a while, a proper sleep, no restless tossing and turning, no screams and vivid nightmares that came for his throat. Just sleep.

Leon breathed for what felt like a long time. Searching for you before wrapping his arms around you pulling you close his hand smoothing over your chest, a familiar heartbeat, a rhythm that made him relax with a scary realization.

He didn’t want to leave.

He wanted the warmth of the mornings and the cold nights wrapped under your blankets wrapped in you.

You.

You.

Fuck how long had he needed you?

How long did he need to be away before realizing that this was heaven. 

The pearly gates that he knew he’d be rejected from, He realized he gladly fall if it meant staying with you.

His hands were stained in blood staining your skin with his filth. He needed to make his place here. He needed you. He wanted you.

Fuck. 

Fuck fuck fuck.

What was he doing? What was he thinking coming here? Back to you? Back to the memory he wanted to forget?

Leon buried his nose in the crook of your neck, screwing his eyes shut, reluctant feeling like a little kid after being told he had to go to school after summer break stamping his foot whining. 

No. 

No. 

No. 

He refused because he didn't want to leave. This was perfect. Everything about this was home. This was home. You were home. His nails dug into your skin drawing out a whine from you still asleep. This was only supposed to be a visit. He didn’t need to look at his phone to know he was expected back. 

Could he come back?

He wasn’t sure.

Leon stared at you, stirring in your sleep, blinking with bleary eyes staring back at him “You okay?” Your voice is still asleep but trying to stay up for him. “Yeah..go back to sleep sweetheart.” he kissed the crook of your neck while rubbing your arm lulling you back to a peaceful slumber.

When you woke up again, Leon was gone.

[pininghermit]

Dreams with no Name

Request: @queenondeezmatatas Have you ever heard of the time traveler’s wife? I’ve been thinking about a similar concept with Adrian lately. A time traveler randomly starts appearing in his life who comes and goes and eventually he finds out they’re married in the future and omg. Or what if Adrian himself time travels into the past, before his partner died when they were both much younger, and seeing her again and so young breaks his heart…

Pairing: Adrian x Reader

Genre: Angst man angst with a possible happy ending 🤭

Summary: You were a fleeting dream in his life. An achingly sweet dream.

AN: I am so sorry for this massive delay but I struggled with this prompt. I don't know I wanted to write something different. Blend stories of time travel and I do plan to give it another try but this is based on the second part of your request. Hopefully, I can plan a good time travel story.

Adrian couldn't close his eyes. He couldn't allow himself to witness all that was lost. But like a bruise that tempts someone to press on it, Adrian's grief forced him to the thorough of the past.

Of all that he had lost, there was one loss not known to many.

It was a quiet chapter. Despair he gifted to himself.

He did not possess anything but fleeting images of you. All that he had was burnt to ashes. All that remained were memories of the past.

So, alone in the dark rooms of his castle, he replayed those memories. He reminisced about the feel of your lips, the tilt of your eyes, the bridge of your nose.

Some days he could feel it under his fingertips. He could hear the chimes of your voice in his dreams. It was better than losing you, he reasoned with himself.

He could still see your eyebags, your sunken cheeks, and hear the struggle of your failing lungs. Even in his dreams, he reached for your hunched form.

His mother was there in those dreams. Holding you with him. She fed you the best of the draughts. Anything to ease your agony. He remembered how hard his mother had tried to save you.

You were a fleeting dream in his life. An achingly sweet dream.

He was young back then. Lisa had found you battered, gasping in an unlit alleyway with a number tattooed on your wrist.

She brought you to Castle Dracula. And Adrian had been intrigued by the new addition.

You were frail. His mother told him, stuck with an infection in your lung. An infection from frequent drowning, forced drowning.

You never mentioned your past. Even the name he knew you by seemed to be made up.

Yet, despite the wounds on your body, the decline of your vision, the struggle of grasping for air, you were beautifully in love with living. You were easygoing with your smiles, never stingy with laughter that left you in pain.

Somehow all the cruelty that the world forced on you failed to erase your kindness.

Even in his dreams that seemed to take him back to the past with you, Adrian failed to notice even an ounce of grief. You sat next to him, talking for hours.

He'd heard all those words several times; after all, he did not possess enough figments of you not to be able to memorize everything about you. But every time your words seemed to settle into his heart with the same fervor.

"You know the snow and freezing wind won't be doing you any favors," Adrian repeated the words he remembered from the past. He dusted the snow gathered in your hair before his arms wrapped around you, picking you up.

Just like every other time, your arms circled his neck, and you rested your head on his chest. Your hair softly fell on your face. "Just because there's a danger of falling, birds don't stop flying, just because winter comes every year, greenery doesn't give up on blooming in spring. Then what do I have to lose," you spoke in riddles as always.

Adrian loved to listen anyway. He knew his next words, his tone, his expression so he followed it, playing the part of his past self. "You're losing comfort. Why are you so set on accelerating the speed of your demise?" His past self couldn't understand your inability to protect yourself from the inevitable pain.

You chuckled teasingly, warming your freezing hands on his nape. He irritably shifted you in his arms. Even in these dreams, your hands felt so real. "It isn't pain that scares me, Adrian. It's the inability to escape it. Every time I feel it, I try to find a way to free myself from the helplessness of enduring it," this was the closest he ever came to your past. Looking back at him, you smiled. "And you always come to get me, don't you?" You kissed his lips.

In the desperation of his dream, he clung to you longer. He kissed you deeper. His kiss wavered only when he felt your quivering lips. He stopped, looking back at you.

This felt different, as if his loss of control had reshaped his past. "How long will you keep rescuing me, Adrian? When will you save yourself?" His steps faltered as he looked at your words.

He stared at you. He didn't remember this. Was he forgetting you? Did he remember the past wrong?

Your hand rested on his cheek, turning his face to look at you.

Just then, passing by the corridor, he saw himself carrying a shawl, heading the same way he had brought you from. He looked at you, still in his arms.

"How long will you continue forcing yourself into a past long gone? Adrian," you cupped his face, "It's time to go." You smiled at him despite your words.

"I… let me stay here," he begged you. "Everything but this is gone," he barely gathered the courage to look in your eyes. "Please… please keep me here," he pulled you closer despite his trembling arms.

"Life isn't meant for past darling," you wipe his tears with you sleeve. The lingering fragrance of herbs fills his senses. "Go back to your present and let me find you again." You kiss him again and the world fades into the dark.

[sunoooism]

I was down ; you picked me up

› summary: in which Taehyun finds you in a pit of despair and helps you climb out.

› angst, comfort / wc: 1,628

 › warnings: mental health issues, self doubting thoughts, suicidal thoughts/intentions, eating disorder & depression, crying, mentions of throwing up, angst, comfort ending, some sort of higher education au (they live in dormitories), if you're ever feeling like this please reach out to someone (my dms r open), I'm not at all romanticising this kind of behaviour but it's comfort writing and very much self indulgent, don't read if you don't like, gn!reader.

everything around you felt dull and dark, felt like it was suffocating you, dragging you down into its grey mass. it had this horrible feeling of loneliness splashed into the mix, filling up your lungs until you were drowning in it. and what was worse, nobody cared enough to pull you out. you supposed it was nobody's fault but your own though. summer was the chance you had been waiting for, the chance to erase yourself. unanswered texts, missed calls and unreturned letters piled up for too long and eventually your friends stopped trying all together. it hurt, but you had achieved your motive in the end, so you didn't understand why you felt so unpleasantly about it. unfortunately rumours were now circling about the school, the hot new subject being that you thought you were too good for your old friends and that's why you ghosted them. ironic, your mind that loved to torture you so with your low self esteem was laughing at you. yet, today you didn't seem to care enough to express it outwardly.

hair askew, uniform crinkled, eyebags that felt ever so heavy, you dragged yourself to the library. earning a few glares and nudges on your way, you had guessed they were fueled by the rumours. and despite looking worse than death itself, no one seemed to notice the longing for it behind your lifeless eyes. as you passed through the many hallways, you spotted your friends, now ex friends, all laughing together through a window. the usual numbness you felt was replaced by a wave of hurt that almost swallowed you whole when you saw how unaffected they were by your absence, even though you knew you didn't have the right to, not after you purposely cut them off. although there were many students blocking your view of them, Soobin still managed to clock you gazing at them with wistful longing and regret.

in an act of panic you jumped at his sudden attention and sped away from them, but not before you heard Kai call your name. fortunately for you a study period was last on your schedule, so you made your way to your dorm, trying to look as inconspicuous as one could when speed walking away from a group of people. the footsteps managed to follow you through buzzing crowds until you reached the hall of which your dorm was located, you breathed a sigh of relief when you could no longer hear their thundering stomps.

warm tears were already making their way down your cheeks by the time you'd collapsed on your bed and hidden yourself amongst the many blankets and cushions sitting upon it. you let your sadness consume you once again, choking on your gasps and sniffles.

your room was your only outlet of peace, every student at the school knew that, which is why you didn't understand why someone was now banging on your door when they were meant to be in class anyway. you didn't have the energy nor the care to open the door. not leaving your dorm in three and a half days had made you feel like jelly whenever you moved, that and all those days depriving yourself of food, water and daylight didn't help either. you had hoped it was punishment enough for pushing your friends away, but apparently something in your body wanted for you to suffer more, curled up in your bed staring at a blank wall until you fell asleep. the showers and the cookie basket your mother sent were calling to you, almost as inviting as a siren song. but with most things these days you couldn't find it in yourself to want to or care enough.

the incessant knocking on your door continued, as well as the now overuse of your name being called. in all honesty the thought of someone seeing you like this made you want to throw up, probably what they would do at the sight of you. ah, your mind was torturing you again, enough to make you teeter and sway at the edge, but never enough to push you over and watch you tumble down until you hit rock bottom.

you heard your doorknob turn and someone walk in. you thought you had locked your door? not knowing who it was you were ready for some judgemental looks being thrown your way when they saw your state. you were hoping it was an axe murderer coming to end your pathetic and dreary life but apparently not as kang taehyun was all who flooded your vision.

"y/n, what the fuck? everyone thought you were dead" the sentence had come out more venomous than he'd of liked, but right now it was hard to sound soft as he stared at his friend looking like they'd been drained of all life.

"might as well be" your throaty response came out quiet, but he heard, and it broke his heart more than when you'd dumped him right before summer. though it was the first time he'd heard you speak in 9 weeks, he could hear all the self loathing and resentment your tone held. taehyun laid a hand on your arm, rubbing soothing circles that spread the first warmth you'd felt in weeks through your body, then he asked the question everyone who felt like you dreaded and hoped for at the same time.

"are you okay?"

somehow, you still had enough fluids in you to push down your stoic barrier and let everything pour out. tears began to stream down your cheeks, which only worried the boy that knelt beside you further. "y/n?" the call of your name passed right through you, too busy gasping between sobs to acknowledge he was talking to you.

"y/n? can you sit up for me?" his tone was mellow, just as soft as his touch that had now trailed down to your hands. you supposed he didn't want to upset you more than you already were by sounding angry. despite the gnawing thought of wanting to curl up in a ball and die because someone had seen you like this, you manoeuvred your body languidly so you could lean against the wall, because you knew that this was best for you right now.

after a moment of putting the deep breathing exercises Yeonjun had taught you to good use, a tissue was held in front of you. your shaky hand reached out and grasped it, barely strong enough to hold it up to your face.

"i'm sorry" the words escaped you before you could even choose to say them, a frown etching its way onto taehyun's brows when he heard. "why are you apologising?"

"I-" the words died in your throat once you realised you weren't quite sure why, was it because you dumped him? because of the fact you ignored him all summer only for him to be the person comforting you at your lowest? both?.

"you don't have to apologise for feeling things'' you didn't quite know how to respond to that. your lack of reply gave him another opening to speak. "do you want to talk more about it after some food and a shower?" nodding hesitantly, you followed his slow movements to walk towards the door, planning to grab clean clothes and a towel on the way. that plan was quickly brushed to the back of your mind when your vision clouded over with black spots, weakening you until you collapsed back onto your bed with a shaky breath that alerted taehyun to your troubles.

"woah, you alright? want me to grab a nurse?" all that followed was a brisk shake of your head and tears making their home under your lash line once again.

stupid. you couldn't even walk right.

"i'm sorry" you squeaked out, voice quivery with the sniffles. "hey, it's okay. there's no need for apologies over this, yeah?" your body sought out refuge as it leant into his palm he had placed gently on your cheek, his affection burning your skin with the familiar warmth that had always come to you when the two of you were dating. you wondered how he felt about all this, watching his ex fall apart multiple times in ten minutes for a reason that was unknown to him. god, you must have looked stupid.

"i'm sorry, taehyun" you finally spoke after an awkward silence, both waiting for the other to say something. "hey, what did I just-"

"no. it's, it's not for that," he watched you carefully, as if he looked too hard you might crack under his gaze. you hated that, but nevertheless you were grateful he cared. "i'm sorry for ignoring you this summer, it wasn't fair to you, or to anyone else I ditched. I just, I want you to know it wasn't because of you. i just thought it might hurt less for you and me when i…."

the rest was caught in your throat as you couldn't bring yourself to say it in front of him, the boy who'd said he would give you the whole world if he could. the boy who treated you like royalty every minute you spent together, the boy who used to love you more than anything else. the boy who still does love you more than anything else. he didn't deserve to hear what you were about to say.

"when you..?" one glance up into his curious brown eyes was all it took for him to understand. you could see him trying to mask the pain for your sake, hiding it so you didn't feel guilty. but you already did.

"i'm sor-" you were promptly interrupted when taehyun spoke over you, eyes gazing fondly into yours. "hey,"

"no more sorries, 'k?"

[sugar-phoenix]

un-satyr.

I decided to swallow my perfectionism and just write out a short story without making it special or anything, just writing all the parts that I wanted to write and finishing. I might edit/add more but honestly I'm pretty happy with what I wrote and I wanted to share it.

tw: gore/violence, mentions of blood + wounds + pelting + pain

Sitting on the riverbank, I carefully brushed my platinum locks. They fell over my shoulders in strands, and on all sides of my head. I hated having my hair cut. If I could, I would wrap them around my horns to keep them out of my eyes. 

But I didn’t have horns.

I dipped my hooves into the water, and continued straightening out my hair until it no longer looked like I had tossed and turned all night. Only my family and the village doctor knew I had been suffering from terrible migraines. It was one more defect to add to my list of flaws. One more reason why I didn't belong. I hoped to hide my problems from the rest of the world.

Alas, brushing your hair out did not fix the dark circles under your eyes, and against my sickeningly pale skin, it was wildly obvious I was losing sleep.

I frowned as I felt a painful throb inside my skull. Why was I born this way? Blindingly white, horn-less, and now, having terrible migraines. Instead of being a regular, normal satyr, I was the village abomination.

I rose from the riverbank to walk.

The smell of the lavender field cleared my migraines a little bit and made it better. Here, I was further from the village, from the feeling of being out of place. Here, I belonged.

I laid in the grass and rested. 

And then they began to pelt me.

Younglings, picking up pebbles and throwing them at me. Telling me I was a freak, a monster. Taunting me with their little nubs of horns on their heads.

Although nobody had ever outright expressed their distaste of me in the village (fae such as us were loath to express anything that might make us seem ungraceful), the behavior of the children spoke volumes of what they thought of me. I rose from the lavender field. A pebble struck my forehead. I ran, blood dripping down my face.

The pain was immense. I clutched my forehead in bed, gently bandaged by my mother, and screamed as my father sent for the village doctor. It didn’t hurt this much initially, yet ever since I came home, the pain had only steadily increased. I struggled to hold still as the doctor unwrapped my bandage, checked my forehead, and reported nothing out of the ordinary. The pain was merely a product of the concussion combined with my migraines. Nonetheless, he re-bandaged it, and gave me a potion that was sure to knock me out as cold as a corpse.

I slept.

I woke up free of the pain that plagued me only hours ago, to a dry, crusty pillowcase. It was stained a deep, dark red. I gasped, and jumped up from my bed to inspect my wound in the mirror. 

My reflection’s eyes stared back at me, the eyebags underneath them gone. My skin glowed, pale as ever, yet it was… sparkling? The hair that fell around the wound was caked red, yet the rest of my hair flowed flawlessly. In between my bangs, I saw something else. Something new.

Ivory and pearlescent, it tore out of the bandages that had unknowingly held it back. A single, solitary horn.

dividers by @cafekitsune here. Header is Young Lady with Roses by The Bank of a Lake, Nathaniel Sichel, from this post here.

[clownetomb]

♡ "Captain's Word."

♡ Buggy x GN!reader ♡

~600 words

! TW: THIS STORY CONTAINS SUICIDAL TOPICS, AND A SUICIDE ATTEMPT FROM THE READER !

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You’ve been in a terrible mental place. All you’ve been thinking about is ways to get out. You sit at the dinner table. You’re usually talkative and eat a lot but tonight.. no words spoken from you, and no food eaten by you. “Hey, what's wrong with you, babe? You've been acting in a really strange manner lately.” You slowly glance up at him, eyebags heavy under your eyes. Not even your clown makeup can hide them. You shake your head to show nothing is wrong and go back to poking your food around with your fork. He looks at you suspiciously, and his expression shows concern. "You sure nothing's wrong? I mean, even your makeup can't hide the dark circles around your eyes." “Mhm.” you quietly hum. Buggy gets closer to you and whispers, “Come on, talk to me - please. I don't like it when you're like this.” You excuse yourself from the table with a gentle nod, and walk to your shared cabin. A few hours later, theres a party going on deck. You’re up in the crow's next at the top and looking down at the deck. You think about how fast you would fall. A crewmember spots you, as you’re standing on the ledge with one foot hanging over. Buggy, noticing you on the top of the crow's nest on one foot at the edge of the deck, quickly rushes towards you, worried about your actions. When he reaches the top, he finds you looking down at the party, and gets scared after realizing your plan. “Hey, honey? What the hell are you doing?” You sigh. “No harm in jumping off.” You wiggle your one foot that's over the edge, almost in a teasing manner. You turn your head to look at him. “I love you.” You take a step over the edge, and land on the deck, unmoving. Buggy runs down the crow's nest and quickly kneels down next to your body. "Babe, please... please stay alive. This can't be the end," he pleads desperately. He starts to tear up, as he realizes how selfish his attitude towards you may have been, and that it might just be the cause of your suffering.

About 7 hours later, the medic on the crew took you into the medical cabin and let you rest, checking on you every now and then. You suddenly wake up, confused and in a daze. Buggy is outside the cabin waiting on ANYTHING about you being alive. As soon as the medic sees you awake, they rush to get their captain. Buggy enters the cabin and runs to your side, holding back tears. He's happy to see that you're still alive but worried about you. "Babe..." is the only word he can muster, but he's relieved to be seeing you awake. You look at him and your lip starts to quiver, tears forming in your eyes. “..'m sorry.” you manage to mutter out. His facial expression softens, and he caresses your face with his palm and wipes your tears off with his thumb "Shhh... it's okay, you don't have to apologize..." He then pulls you in for a tight hug "I'm just glad you're still alive. I thought I'd lost you forever." As he holds you, you cry on his shoulder. He sighs and hugs you tighter, rubbing your back soothingly. As he feels you sobbing, he gets sad because he hates seeing you in such emotional turmoil. Buggy continues to hold you, rubbing your back, and rocking you back and forth gently. “Buggy..thank you for loving me.” He pauses the embrace and strokes your hair. His expression is soft and his eyes are filled with devotion and affection. "You're welcome. I love you... I'm never going to stop loving you."

“Captain’s word.”

[lookingforlia]

Demon Tsukishima

Part-1

Warnings : dark magick

She sat in the middle of a protection circle , muttering a chant quietly in her breathy tone . Drops of sweat run down the nape of her neck . A lit candle in her dark room lighting up her skin into a beautiful honey shade, she looked tired with the lack of sleep yet her eyes were decorated with pinkish eyebags .

The candle flickered.

"State your business ." A deep voice enteruppted the silence of the room . Ringing her off her guard as If a loud alarm has been set off. She squinted her eyes open glancing at the figure resting peacefully on the floor .

" Are you a demon ? "

"I'm pretty sure you called for one. "

She took a few seconds to register that in her mind as she stares at him in alarm and curiosity.

"I know I'm handsome but your silence is making me uncomfortable." He talked as if he was bored to even be in her presence. But of course she had no regards for it. Not when she finally summoned a demon .

She gulps unknowingly not really being able to form direct words she sits there gaping at the boy in silence .

They read into each other's eyes untill the awkwardness of the air turns into a strange comfort .

"You've never summoned one before ?" He inquired , shattering the peaceful silence between them making her realize she's been staring at him for a few seconds too long .

Too long for it to just be curiosity.

"No , this is my first time. " she replied . An amuse making it's way into her facial expressions.

"Yeah you're making that very obvious. " He makes another snarky remark without breaking the eye contact . It was a lie if he said he wasnt amused either . It's not everyday he meets a human who looks him in the eye .

"State your business ." He said , this time , voice turning the atmosphere of the room into a slightly colder one.

"I need you help ." She replies without delays . A certain desparation in her voice . And ofcourse it didn't go unnoticed by the demon boy .

"I hope you know the costs ." He hummns.

"I'm aware ." She replies instantly but then , hesitates before speaking again , " but can you do it ? "

A histericall laughter fills the room . "I am a demon , are you actually asking me that ? "

" I asked because it is something impossible ."

He stares at her for another few seconds trying to process her words . And suddenly it hits . " It's bringing back the dead isn't it ? "

She was speechless at his accuracy ." Yes ." She confirms . " But can you do that ? Is it possible ? "

Although his expressions changed he still covered a smirk , " What do you think ? "

"I think only god can do it , but , he hasn't been answering my prayers and cries . So I called for someone who might ."

Desperation ,

That's a very common trait of the people who usually make deals with the devil ,

They sell out their most important possession out of that desperation. And when they do it , they don't consider what they're loosing could also be very important .

Because when you posess something precious , you dont realize it's value until you loose it. And once do , it's most likely too late.

"You would have to pay a bigger prize ."

"It's my soul right ? . . I'm willing. " The words come out as a second nature .

It kinda takes the demon boy aback for a second because he's never met some so aware and still so willing to jump into the pits of fire by their own will. It's not brave , It's stupid , its impulsive , and they would regret it.

They always do.

"It might take a little bit more than your soul. " He pulls our a coin from his pockets playing with it on his fingers .

"What is that ? "

"Depends ," He mumbles . "On what's the most precious possession you have to offer."

She lets her mind wander for a moment for all the possible things she could value after throwing her life away. But there was nothing that came around her mind. Because she already threw her life away , what can still be precious to you when you know you're gonna extinct anyway . What could she still experience when she won't be even allowed to have it the moment she signs her life away ? Is there anything to loose ?

"I would do whatever you ask me to ," she declares ,

stupidly .

Again , giving herself up so easily .

The demon boy's lips curve upward ."So whom are we resurrecting? " He questions , still the coin between his fingers .

"Sugawara koushi . " The name bounces off her lips like a forgotten poem.

"Lost love ? " He chuckles mockingly the sound echoing from his throat .

He couldn't help but mock her , she's the stupidest type , the type to make disitions based on her emotions , native enough to let her emotions control her. Hurt her or ever kill her .

She was the type to sell her soul for others , selflessly , without thinking twice ,

And she was the type to regret it when the happy times return back into her life and tries to change the deal.

She was the type he hated the most.

"Ex boyfriend ? "

"No, we never dated , " she replies pausing a bit ."I never got the chance to tell him I loved him. "

"I would need his memories , " he speaks with a smirk painted in his face all the way up to his eyes.

"What ? "

"He wouldn't remember you , he wouldn't remember dying , as if the time went back , and he never met you , " the boy observed her reaction .

"It's okay , it's fine with me ." She looks up with her eyes stronger again . "It's fine as long as he's alive. " the desparation still ringing in her  voice .

"Alright then ," he tosses the coin in the air and it falls right into the plan of his hand . His eyes glows red , illuminating the dark room brighter than the candle itself .

" What is your name ? " He asked . his voice echoed off walls of the room .

"Ayla Hamasaki ." She spoke , knowing very well that whatever she was getting herself into is gonna be agonizing .

it was gonna be the end of her ,

And she knew that .

He hoped she did. 

"I'm Tsukishima kei . And I hope we have a fair deal now ."

Ayla looked death right in it's eyes as she bored into Kei's .

She was sure of herself.

Selflessly , something that should be stated as stupidness ,

She comfortablely held onto the newfound hope she met in the darkest pits of hell , intertwining fingers with death on the other hand.

[burdenedwithfaith]

The Mega Character Questionnaire

Full Name: John Thomas Ward Aliases: Father Ward, Master of Spirits, Priest, Preacher (the latter two are usually derogatory).

Appearance.

FACECLAIM: Daniel Zovatto as Father Esquibel from The Pope's Exorcist GENDER: Trans man HEIGHT: 6'2'' WEIGHT: 230lbs (He has gained weight since the game) BUILD: Large, broad, solidly built but also soft and chubby. HAIR: Short, side parted fringe, neat. Dark brown. SKIN: Pale, mostly fair and smooth, but a few facial lines from lack of sleep/worry lines. EYES: Blue eyes, very tired looking, small eyebags/dark circles. Light crinkles under eyes. MOUTH: Thin lips, downturned corners. NOSE: Large-ish. Downturned, round. Wide nostrils. HANDS: Large hands but with slim fingers. Nails grow fairly fast so they're usually quite long. SCARS: Surgery scars on his knee and chest. All scars from demons fade completely after a while, but will present during possession events. CLOTHES: Semi-formal and conservative. Very rarely wears graphic/slogan tees. Might wear shorts maybe 1 day of the year.

Speech.

ACCENT: I honestly don't know what he should sound like but maybe like a very mild New York accent that he picked up while studying there but never got rid of. LANGUAGE: Native english, fluent latin, learning spanish. ARTICULATION: Usually fairly good with words and explaining himself, unless it's a topic he tends to get carried away with, then he tries to explain everything at once and skips ahead because he gets excited. LAUGHTER: He doesn't laugh often. It usually sounds forced, strained or awkward. But on the rare occasion he's actually in a good mood, he has a hearty, musical laugh. GRUMP: Not often. He usually keeps his grievances to himself.

Mannerisms.

FACE: He's not very expressive, and tends to have something of a "resting sad face". He'll occasionally scowl, and rarely smiles, but mostly looks forlorn. HANDS: While fairly static most of the time, will very much talk with his hands during service. EMOTIONAL OUTBURSTS: Rarely. He's usually extremely reserved and repressed. If he reaches this point, something is up, and it's usually something bad. HABITS: He hums frequently and occasionally sings to himself. He'll also regularly fiddle with his cross/necklace. POSTURE: Good posture, stands straight. WALKING POSTURE: Walks with a slight limp, which does worsen the longer he stays on his feet. SITTING POSTURE: Will usually sit straight, crosslegged. Sometimes slouches when relaxing. PERSONAL SPACE: Very big on personal space. Don't touch him, at least not without indicating your intent to.

Health:

DIET: Fairly good diet. Cooks a lot of food for himself, and it's usually balanced stuff. He does eat a LOT though. SLEEP: Sleeps very poorly. Has nightmares almost constantly. Attempts to sleep in shifts in order to avoid them. EXERCISE: Very little exercise. Just enough to avoid aggravating his knee. Has recently taken up yoga. ACTIVITY: Constantly working, either at the church or as an exorcist. CLEANLINESS: Very clean. Bathes once a week and showers every other day. MEDICINAL DRUGS: God, so many. Antidepressants, anti-psychotics, sleeping pills, HRT, also birth control. ILLNESS: Asthma, though it's dormant and rarely ever flares up. INJURIES: Old broken knee injury. Probably wouldn't be half as bad as it is if he just went to the damn doctor about it. OTHER: Has coulrophobia, also has developed iatrophobia due to his treatment at the psyche ward. PTSD, depression, anxiety, delusions and... God knows what else, the man is a mess.

Personal.

INTROVERT/EXTROVERT?: Oddly both. An introvert in his personal life, but an extrovert during his clerical duties. OPTIMIST/PESSIMIST: Mostly pessimist, but has been developing optimistic traits since reaffirming his faith. SEXUALITY: Bisexual, with a preference for older men, or women of around the same age. ROMANTIC: Biromantic. Is somewhat fearful of romantic relationships, as he fears getting hurt/hurting others. He's already been heartbroken once. MEMORY: Has lots of gaps in his memory. Most of which are probably due to supernatural circumstances. INTUITION: High intuition. Has a form of extrasensory perseption. PROBLEM SOLVING: Pretty good with puzzles. Providing they actually have answers =) GOALS: To protect others. INSECURITIES: Fears that he simply can't do good enough. Fears that he'll eventually become the evil that he fights against. ACHIEVEMENTS: He saved the world, if anyone cares. ANXIETY: SO MUCH OVERWHELMED: ALL THE TIME COMFORTS: His cross, his faith, his friends

The Past.

PARENTS/GUARDIANS: Orphaned. Mother died when he was young. Didn't have a father (maybe literally lol). Raised by a demon nun cultist lady. SCHOOL: Was raised and taught in the church and was pretty much indoctrinated tbh. FURTHER EDUCATION: College tuition paid for by church on the grounds that he joined the clergy and basically became their whipping boy. LIFE EVENTS: One hell of a shitshow of an exorcism, followed by a stay in the psych ward, followed by his marriage followed by his divorce followed by stopping the end of the world. WORST DAY OF THEIR LIFE: See above. BEST DAY OF THEIR LIFE: Probably settling down with his new partners.

Interactions.

MINGLING: Good at small talk on a superficial level, not good with opening up on a personal level. PHYSICAL: Doesn't like to be touched by unfamiliar people. Even then, he prefers to see when touch is about to be initiated. OPENNESS: Not very open. Takes him a while to trust people. GENEROSITY: Is very giving and caring. Acts of service are a love language. JEALOUSY: Gets jealous of people who can live a normal life. TEMPER: Has a LOT of anger, but keeps it hidden well. Doesn't lose his temper easily. EMPATHY: So much empathy he loves so much. AFFECTION: Has difficulty showing affection, but if he touches you or lets you touch him, that means he really likes you. DISTASTE: Because John is exceedingly polite to everyone, his dislike is shown through snark, sarcasm, and passive aggressive psuedo-politeness. ETIQUETTE: As above, he's normally very polite. SELF ESTEEM: He might seem meek and insecure, but after the trials he faced, he thinks a lot better of himself and will stand his ground. FLIRTING: Can get easily flustered due to conflicts with his faith/vows. But, if he's into it, he can be just as flirty back.

Life.

CAREER: Priest/exorcist. COMBAT SKILLS: Physically, no. He doesn't have the mobility for it. COOKING: Loves to cook! MARRIAGE: Was married once. It was annulled on grounds of him "not being of sound mind". Doesn't particularly want to marry again. KIDS: If he weren't a priest, he could see himself adopting. WORRIES: He fears becoming the evil he fights against. HOBBIES: Reading, cooking, occasional fishing.

[xiaozb]

Aging around the eyes | Do you get caught in these problems when people get older

As we age, all parts of the human body begin to age. Due to factors such as thinner, more sensitive, and more prone to fatigue, the eyes have become the first part of the human body to age ❗

Next, let's understand why the periocular area ages first?

What are the problems of aging? And how to correctly improve the problem

Why does aging start with the eyes- The Five Sacred "Sins"

The first "sin" of eye problems: the thinnest.

The skin around the eyes is the thinnest, with a thickness of only 0.33 to 0.36 millimeters, which means that the skin around the eyes is only 1/5 that of the face.

The second 'sin' of eye problems: the most sensitive.

The skin around the eyes is the most sensitive, and improper use of facial products on the eyes can also lead to periocular problems.

The third "sin" of eye problems: the most fatigue.

The skin around the eyes is the most fatigued, with an average of 24000-28000 blinks per person per day. Therefore, the eyes are the most fatigued organ in the human body and also the most prone to aging. The skin around the eyes ages 8 years earlier than the facial skin.

The fourth 'sin' of eye problems: the easiest.

The eyes are the most prone to wrinkles. The first wrinkle in a woman starts from the eyes, and the appearance of wrinkles is a signal of skin aging.

The fifth 'sin' of eye problems: at least.

The eye is the part with the least distribution of Sebaceous gland and sweat glands, so the eye skin is very easy to dry and lack water, resulting in dry lines and fine lines.

The Three Levels of Periocular Aging

① Skin color: Periorbital dark circles, spots and dullness

② Texture: Fine lines, wrinkles, lower eyelid particles

③ Shape and contour: eye bags, lacrimal sulcus, and periorbital depression

Five major eye aging problems ①

● Fine lines around the eyes

● Eyebags

● Relaxed eyelids

● Periorbital dark circles

● Lacrimal sulcus

What kind of eye pattern do you belong to

Dry lines (around 18 years old)

When there is an expression, there will be horizontal lines

Single line pattern (around 18 years old)

There are a few lines when there is no expression

When there is an expression, the lines are obvious

Cross pattern (around 20 years old)

The fine lines at the moment form a cross pattern

Long dry lines will form these wrinkles

Cross stripes (around 25 years old)

The development of cross pattern

Be sure to handle and maintain it in a timely manner

Fish tail pattern (around 25-30 years old)

There are lines when there is no expression

More pronounced when there is an expression

Ordinary eye cream repair products cannot alleviate

Improvement of periocular aging and correct care

Develop good lifestyle habits

● Do a good job of eye sun protection

● Strengthen eye moisturizing

[urlocallsimp]

Aaaaaa how i love this serie!!! + the way this is demonstrated and described is just sooo accurate and perfect aaaah thanks for taking your time to voice out what we all notice but can't put to words!!

The way his eyes in real life are the definition of 'kind eyes' literally I can't detect any evil in them, especially when he smiles it's sooo genuine and just pure sunshine ✨ but then in acting most his emotions are expressed in his eyes and eyebrows, i noticed that that's his style of navigating and showing different emotions, pretty certain that's the effect of his scorpio moon!

I'd add my genuine and serious LOOOOOOOVE for his eyebags/dark circles MY Gahd 😍🔥 I grew up w dark circles and always been insecure about them and I never believed when my friends told me some people find them hot until I saw them on Noch and i was like HOOOOLY FUCK they ARE hot!!! I hope no photoshoot he ever does conceals them!!

Tenoch's Anatomy: Part II.1

Oh boy this is gonna be a long one- 2 sub parts (part II.2 is continued as a reblog). This one's gonna be a love letter to my favorite body part of Tenoch 😝 his eyes. And also in turn, a tribute to his mad range as an actor.

To me, eyes are the favorite way to look into people's soul and try and gauge their depth. As they say, eyes are the windows to one's soul. And in Tenoch's case, it's a door. A door to a bottomless ocean that is the depth of his eyes. Which reflects the depth of his soul. And to think about the fact that he was about to lose an eye as a young teen is terrifying. He depends so much on them to convey emotions that words can't express.

If most of the following images and gifs are of Namor, it's because every frame of his from the movie is permanently etched in my mind.

The first one below is because it does something to me which is inexplicable. The fiery eyes coupled with his beautiful indigenous high cheekbones (more on that in a separate post):

The sinister smile:

Awe and admiration:

Empathy:

Intimidation:

Diabolical fury/sinister smile version 2:

Moving on to other movies/shows that capture his eyes very well.

Innocence, care:

Cathartic release/heartbreak/grief:

Confidence:

Disclaimer: none of the pics or gifs are by me. Sourced from Tumblr database. Credits to respective owners (gifs by @aolechan, @rafikecoyote ). Please let me know and I will provide credit!

[sashi-ya]

Hello sashi! This is my first time applying. Can I apply for Law x female reader? Female with sexual frustration but who hides it from her partner, because she doesn't want to bother him and wants her partner to the point of riding him one night while he sleeps and when he wakes up Law gives him what he wants. Please and thank you so much, I love your stories, they are great. 💕

Hi darling!! Of course!! I hope you enjoy! And thank u so much! 💖💖

😈💜Sashi's Dark Corner💜😈

NSFW ~ Trafalgar Law x F! Reader ~ Skin Vs Silicone

tw: NSFW. OK HEAR ME OUT: even if it is stated that Law was conscious and awaken the whole time, she didn't ask for permission so KEEP THAT IN MIND if you are gonna read it. It's NOT a 100% non con, BUT she didn't act right and she says so. So please keep that in mind. Law is not mad, he teased her, but still.

wc: 2.4K

Like this event? masterlist ~

Law’s rotations are intense. He is about to become a cardiothoracic surgeon so he is usually on call for more than 48 hours. He wants to become the best so he pushes himself to the max and spends most of his time at the hospital so he could have as many surgeries as possible. In fact, you admire how dedicated and passionate he is. Law will become the next best surgeon in the world, after his dad, Dr. Trafalgar. But you miss him at home, your bed misses him next to you on cold nights…and your body, your body misses his.

The soon to be surgeon arrives at home after Dr. Marco had to order him to leave the hospital. Law’s eyebags are darker than usual, and he has a very tired expression on his constant frown. “Hi…” he mumbles, dragging himself inside, still wearing some smelly dark blue scrubs. “Hi, sweetheart… Come in, it’s cold. I’ve prepared you a hot meal” you tell him, taking his bag and helping him take his mask off.

Law is not a really sweet nor a touchy lover on a daily basis, but today he flops into your arms right away. His head rests on the crook of your neck, and his arms hang loose at each side of his body. You comfort him, on arm tracing circles on his back, the other patting his head. “You look so tired, baby…”

“Mhhh..” he hums, with his nose pressed into your neck. Thing that always makes you shiver, and in other conditions maybe could end into a rough sexual session. But today’s not the case. Law is so tired; he couldn’t be asking for sex in any way. The only thing he wants to do in bed is to sleep for at least a whole day -or even more-.

“Did Dr. Marco send you home again?” you ask, sure the man was trying to prevent a resident from dying in the middle of the operation room. “Yes… he said I’ve done more hours than I should and that I might commit mistakes when operating so tired. He also forced me to take some days off” he says, now passing his arms around your waist.

You smile, he is gonna rest at least. Plus, you are gonna have him home, all for you.

After he ate, sometimes almost falling asleep over the plate, both went to bed. He went first, actually, since you stood a little to do the dishes. Law wanted to help, but you refused.

“Go and have a shower, relax. Go to sleep after. I’ll take you some tea” you mumble, as he walks upstairs scratching his dishevelled black hair. “yeah…come too, I wanna be with you” he utters, making you feel butterflies in your stomach. Though, you killed them. The poor man has just enough energy to breathe, how can you make him endure through a sexual situation… you can’t, right?

You hear the sound of the shower tap opening and while you dry your hands and put back the plates, you wish you were there under the warm water raining over both of you… like the old times. “Ah… If only you weren’t so perfect… even with that zombie like face you look fuckable, my sweet Law”.

You go upstairs and change into your pyjamas. You aren’t as tired as him, but you really wanna cuddle with him in bed, so you wait there for him to get out of the shower.

His naked torso, still a little wet, flashes its perfection and inked lines to you. Law is only wearing a white towel tucked around his hips and nothing more. Perfect caramel skin, hearts garnishing in black lines his whole body.

“BED” he says, smiling more to the mattress than to you. He comes closer and does not even attempt to get into his pyjamas’ shorts. He doesn’t care, he just needs the bed. He flops right next to you, without giving a damn about his towel opening at all. “Sowwy, I just need this” he says, enjoying the soft caress of the sheets over his body.

“Sweetheart, you are gonna get the pillow wet. Let me bring you a towel, your hair is still wet” you mumble. You desperately need to get away from there, or else you will pounce on him. “huh… ok” he moans, smiling with his eyes closed. “But come here, I wanna be with you”.

Those words… they say you should be careful with what you wish… and Law should be so.

You bring a little towel, and after getting in bed next to him, you help him to put it in between his head and the pillow. Though, you are sure he never noticed, as he was probably already falling asleep. “My baby…” you purr, kissing his forehead and definitely noticing how he had drifted into the oneiric world.

But you were wrong. Law might be sleeping, but he is still touchy. His arms reach for your body, still with his eyes closed, and pull you against his chest. “Come’ere” he whispers, as your cheek gets pressed against him. “Y-yeah” you whine because you can’t deny how warm his flesh feels against yours. “Cuddle with me”.

You do as he tells and getting comfortable you hug him too. Your hand rests over his belly, that goes up and down slowly each time, and your lips barely kiss his skin. “Sleep well, my sweet doctor”.

A few minutes pass, in which you relax, trying to think away those impure thoughts. But Law’s scent is so damn delicious, a perfect mix of subtle soap and his natural body smell… ambrosial. You rest there, imagining what you will do once he recovers, after he sleeps off all of the exhaustion… but suddenly, he turns you around.

You end up being spooned by him, his hand pressing your belly so you get closer, oh so close to his body. His chin rests on your shoulder, and his goatee grazes your neck. The warm feeling of his slow breathing tickles your skin, and it makes you instantly aroused. Whether he is doing this on purpose or not, it’s beginning to have its effect.

“Weren’t you tired?” you ask, giggling. You need to check if he is indeed up to play. “Uhmmgh” he utters, clearly he is trying to be awake when his own body refuses to do so. Poor man. “Shhh... go back to sleep, sweetheart”

Yet, Law, who minutes after snores softly in your ear, seems to move his own hips really subtly against your ass cheeks. “Why do you keep doing this, lord…” you ask yourself, in complete pain. You can sense he is hard, but he is asleep… how does he manage to do so?.

His inked hand rests atonic over your belly, yet the graze of his soft palm it’s enough to make you shiver. You ponder the idea of getting out of bed, just until you cool off, but the truth is that you can’t. You don’t want to wake him up, and you don’t want him to stop touching you so innocently, yet so sexily.

Your body reacts at every little sound he emits. “Law must be dreaming” you think, judging by the way he sometimes moans and babbles incompressible words. Your back feels warm, and it is probably because the towel he had around his hips has fully untucked and he is now completely naked against you.

Moving a little just to roll over your side, you end up in front of him. The soft light of the emergency light you usually have on the hall of your upper floor filters through the door and illuminates his profile. He is hard, hard, and sweaty. But he is asleep, so deeply asleep.

You get lost in the repetitive motion of his chest going up and down, slowly, calmly, breathing the air around you, leaving you without oxygen left… or perhaps it’s just how sexy he looks to your eyes.

Your hand rests, barely grazing his skin, over his belly. Lower it goes, ignoring every red flag your mind could put in the middle. “He is asleep” “Leave him rest” “You should ask him first”. You notice how his member twitches now, “why… Why, Law?”. Even a pearl of iridescent fluid sprouts from it, and you gloat… “Is this for real, doc?” you whisper, making him smirk. A smirk you didn’t see, because you were absolutely focused on stopping yourself from not pouncing into him.

Law acts so incredibly well when he wants, that you can’t see he is actually pretty woken up…

He grunts, sleepy grunts, eyes closed. His hand slides from his chest to his belly, dragging “by accident” your hand towards a dangerous, warm zone of his body. That place he told you is called “Scarpa’s Triangle” and it’s no other than the upper part of the thigh, close, so close to his sex. You can even feel his femoral pulse pumping over your hand, and like a vampire you feel attracted to bite, to kiss, to lick.

“Just a kiss and I’m off to the bathroom. Mr vibrator would do the job” you swear…

And your lips crash right there, centimetres from his glorious shaft. You inhale his scent, clean with a mix of his perfume. Classic, manly, soft, musky. A kiss that lasts longer than it should, a kiss you don’t want to break. And you don’t. Your lips trace a little path from his groin and all around the base of his sex. Sex that keeps twitching and growing stronger.

“Would it be so wrong if I just… lick you clean? you are gonna wet the sheets” you whisper, looking for excuses to taste him. The tip of your tongue comes closer to the little trail that drop of precum left, from his gland through his shaft. Delicious salty treat to spice your night, the licking that makes him even harder.

His hand sloppily gets to your head, and rests there like when you give him oral. Muscle memory is real, you think. “Would it be that bad… If I…” you whisper, lips touching Law’s sex, lips that soon end up around it. And you go, slowly, almost imperceptible, up, and down with your head. You rejoice in the taste of your lover's dick, and you feel a soft pressure over your head to go deep, deep until your throat.

Some tears sprout from the corner of your eyes, and you feel in heaven. How sick and perverted you are now, how badly this is… but how much you needed it… and your free hand plays under your shorts, tracing circles over your clit.

Law can’t stop himself from grunting from time to time, and you notice his mandible and neck muscles tense. His belly spasms, he clenches his teeth, but he is still “asleep”. “Sorry, I need you inside me” you moan, when your fingers are unable to give you what you really want, what you really need.

Taking your pyjama shorts off, and the damped underwear you were wearing, you straddle your hips over his crotch. At first you only rub yourself against him, precum mixing with your arousal products, stings of pleasure hitting your core. His tip looks itself for your entrance, that’s always been like this. Law’s dick has a natural tendency of penetrating you. And you won’t stop it. Surely you won’t.

“I need you” you moan, completely lost, possessed by a lustful demon. You are just like a succubus, attacking his prey during his sleep to steal the seed of a poor young victim. You stand up a little and let his hardness slip inside you… it feels so good. Finally real skin, not the sterile silicone of your toys.

Being on top has always been amazing for you, the slight curve of his dick stimulates so perfectly your special point. Just a little movement could be enough to make you come, but you want more, more, so much more. You drool, like a beast, well aware what you are doing is completely immoral and wrong, and still unable to stop your humping.

“Fuck” you whine, using his body just for you.

“Yes, fuck” he whispers, and carves his fingers on each of your thighs’ sides. You almost go limp seeing his grey eyes fixed on yours, open and full of desire. You stop yourself, terrified and feeling like shit. What you did is not far from being a crime.

“Don’t you dare stop, Name-ya” he giggles. “I wasn’t sleeping, but I knew that you wouldn’t touch me if I didn’t act” he continues, with a sincere smile and not mad at you. “You… Law…” you whisper, lips trembling. A mix of emotions that is about to make you cry.

“I’ve been teasing you all night, silly. Now, let me fuck you as I should have for so long, all right?” he tells you, turning you around and pinning you against bed. “I kinda wanna fuck you from behind tonight. Come on, turn around”.

And just as he commands, you obey. Your belly against your bed, your ass lifted. Not on all fours, just your ass up. He tops you, his dick searches and finds your wet entrance, and inside he goes. His body weight crashes you, but the feeling of being penetrated like this, belly pressed by your own and his weight of the bed, creates the perfect conditions for extreme pleasure.

And Law fucks you rough, moaning, groaning in your ear, biting even your shoulders, kissing you from the side, leaving your cheek shiny by playful tongues looking for the other in a hot, erotic, lustful dance.

“My little dark Name-ya… I didn’t know you were so needy, huh? Fucking me even while I’m sleeping… How much do you like my dick, huh? you wanted my dick inside you so desperately, didn't you?” he asks, while he fucks you mercilessly. “Yes, Y-es Law. I’m sorry, I was so--- needy” you moan, as his hand goes around your neck for a better grip. “Sorry? for being a needy slut for my dick? Please, don’t be sorry. I want that every night from now on”

Not once but twice you come under his unstoppable, insatiable, precise thrusts. Even a third time, while Law gets to his own climax, biting your neck, leaving the imprint of his sexual needs. Because Law also needs you, also desires you, also wants your body and also misses fucking you.

“I’m sorry for making you wait. I love you” he moans once he comes right inside you.

“It’s all worth it, babe…” you whine, feeling your throbbing core get full of him… ~

[thelost-in-time]

Hi :> first, I think your blog is rly cool and I really like your writing!

If it’s not too much;trouble, could I maybe request reverse comfort hcs with Zhongli, Ayato (if you write for him that is), Diluc and Kaeya?

if it makes you uncomfortable you can ignore this!

thank you very much, I sincerely hope you have a nice day!

Thank you so much! As for the characters I write, I write for most of the characters, so no need to fret. Here is your request! If you want me to change any part, then I will do so. Thank you and I hope also have a nice day/night.

I am here

Comforting Zhongli, Ayato, Diluc and Kaeya

Tw: fear of loss (Zhongli), death (Diluc), stress (Ayato), feeling lost (Kaeya). Long, non-bulleted hcs. Very detailed feelings and long hc on Diluc's part.

How do you stay so strong? How did you hide it all for so long? How can I take the pain away?

It kills me how your mind can make you feel so worthless

Zhongli

You noticed that Zhongli was feeling down lately, but he was doing a good job at hiding it, considering nobody else picked it up.

You being his loving s/o decided to ask him about it, only for him to simply shake his head with a small smile, a sad smile.

"It's nothing, my love. Don't worry yourself over it. I am fine."

Zhongli tells you, gently patting your head as he attempts to walk past you, only for you to grab his arm.

"Morax, tell me the truth."

You tell him, your voice firm yet gentle as you pull him back to you, his eyes slightly wide.

"It's just.... I saw everyone I love leave. I'm afraid I'll outlive you too."

Zhongli mumbles to you as he pulls you into a hug, burying his face in the crook of your neck as to avoid your gaze.

You let out an inaudible sigh, brushing your fingers through his long hair.

"Even if I leave before you.... I will make sure I'm reborn again and again in order to be with you. I will fight death if I have to, but I won't leave you ever."

You tell him, slightly moving to place a kiss to his forehead, his grip on you tightening just a little.

"I don't want you to leave. I don't want to leave you."

Zhongli tells you in a mumble, his voice trembling, unlike the rocky exterior he portrayed himself as.

Zhongli was unshakeable as a mountain, but even those mountains tremble during an earthquake.

All of Zhongli's fears and sadness was an earthquake to make him shake, but you are Zhongli's safe space.

With you, Zhongli knows he can tremble and fall and you'll be there to catch him.

Ayato

Ayato currently had his head resting on his desk, a tired look on his face that was covered by his desk.

You knocked on his door and got no response, so you let yourself into his study and saw Ayato's hunched over figure in the dark. You could already tell he was stressed.

"Ayato? Sweetie? Are you okay?"

You asked him as you switched on the light, hearing him groan at the harshness of the sudden light.

"Turn out the light."

Ayato grumbled to you, raising his head ever so slightly to look at you, a tired expression on his face as his eyebags were more prominent in the light.

"On second thought, nevermind. I need to get back to work."

Ayato grumbled, his voice breaking slightly as the stress he faced was more evident the longer you looked at him.

Dishevelled hair, dark circles under his eyes, wrinkled clothes that he had been wearing for a week—

Wait, a week? No wonder he looked so broken.

"Enough, Kamisato Ayato. We are going to bed. Together."

You tell him with a firm tone, dragging him out of his study as you ignore any protest from him and drop him on your shared bed.

"Ayato, I know you're stressed about your work, but please take a rest. You're more important, and I'll help you."

You tell him, sitting next to him as he rests his head on your lap, looking up at you with a thankful smile and expression.

"Thank you, my love. You're always here for me, as I am for you. To have you be by my side truly is a blessing for me."

Ayato tells you, his eyes slowly starting to close as he tries to fight sleep, but inevitably succumbs to it as he rests in your hold.

Ayato never sleeps in the presence of anyone except you, because you make him feel safe.

You see him as Ayato, a normal person and not the head of the Kamisato clan, and for that, he is thankful.

The next day, Ayato is less stressed because you helped him with his work, so he compensates you by taking you out on a date.

As for why this is so short, I have no excuses except being stressed is tiring, and finding your safe space is a godsend.

Diluc

Diluc Ragnvindr had been moody for the past few days, and while people had an inkling of an idea what was happening, nobody knew for sure.

Kaeya was more distant with everyone, but he was your only hope at what was going on.

"Oh. Today is the day that Crepus died."

Kaeya told you, a solemn tone in his voice as he did his paperwork, not even sparing you a glance.

"Diluc takes it harder than me. Go see him."

And those were the words that sent you rushing to find Diluc, instinctively knowing where he could be.

You find Diluc, sitting at Crepus' grave, his face hidden by his hair as he sets some flowers on his dad's grave.

"Diluc."

You say softly, as to not startle him, gently placing a hand on his shoulder.

Trying to get a good look at his face, you notice how devoid of any emotions he was. Just blanked face.

"When my father died, I broke down. I cried so much and blamed myself for not being able to save him. I held myself responsible."

Diluc began to speak, moving to hold your hand for support as he finally met your gaze, his ruby gaze looking broken.

"I believe it was all my fault, that I was a curse. I believed my dad died because of me, but I had to pull myself together the same day."

Diluc looked away from you to look at his dad's grave again, you gently squeezing his hand to comfort him.

Diluc fell silent, giving you the chance to speak to him once again.

"How did you stay so strong? How did you hide it all for so long?"

You ask him, gently placing your other hand on his cheek to get him to look at you again, to which he did.

"I had to. I didn't have a choice."

Was all that Diluc had said, neither of you knowing the exact reason he had to be so strong, other than knowing he just did.

"How can I take the pain away?"

You asked him again, to which he rested his head on your shoulder, closing his eyes.

"Just stay here with me."

And stay with him you did, easing the torment Diluc felt in his soul, in his heart.

You managed to calm his inner demons.

Kaeya

Laughter that normally filled the air was now replaced with the sound of silence.

The talkative Captain Kaeya Alberich was nowhere in sight, which was unusual for him as he could be seen walking around almost all the time.

You were getting worried, so you decided to go and look for him at the last place anyone would think to look: a cliff overlooking Mondstadt in its entirety.

There was Kaeya, all by himself, looking solemn.

"Kaeya? What's bothering you?"

You asked him with concern, placing a hand on his shoulder.

"I'm a monster, a burden. I don't belong anywhere. Why are you with me?"

Kaeya asked you, almost robotically as he glanced at you out of the corner of his eye.

"Kaeya.... It kills me how your mind can make you feel so worthless."

You say softly, gently holding him close to you like a piece of fragile glass.

"You're not a monster. If you have no home, I'll be your home."

You tell him, kissing his forehead as you cradled his face.

"Can you really love me even though nobody else does?"

Kaeya asks you, looking at you with a gaze filled with uncertainty.

"I will always love you, no matter what happens."

You tell him softly, the wind carrying your promise for him so that the whole of Mondstadt could bear witness to your love for him.

"I... I am found, aren't I?"

Kaeya asks with a chuckle, relaxing in your hold.

With you, Kaeya has a home, he is found, he is loved.

End

[hyerinrose]

Bad Romance♡ Part 1

Note : I am back! back with the milk because I am a #responsible dad who didn't totally leave out of nowhere :) Anyways thanks for reading bye ily!/p

T/W : implied murder, hint at stalking, yandere, implied death.

«Yandere! Loner Girl X GN Reader»

[2]

Masterlist

«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────»

The cloudy and murky evening skies reflected on their emotion after a long day of crying in the school's bathroom. [Name]'s eyes were rimmed with redness and dried up tears lingered on their face.

Xin Yun is a renowned heartbreaker at their school yet [Name] foolishly believed in his sweet sugar coated lies and empty promises of forever. Today were the worst day of their life! Not only their now ex boyfriend broke up with them in the most brutal way possible, they also had to deal with migraines from the lecture Mx Akane give them for missing their classes.

'God, I know I haven't talk to you since junior high but please give me mercy from all of this chaos you put in my life..'

Suddenly a locker slammed beside them who were zoning out in amidst putting their belongings and textbooks away. [Name] flinched and turned to face the person who looked as miserable as them were, the girl mirrored their heartbroken expression.

Her pink bubblegum hair were tussled and messy as if she had been tugging on them, dark circles and eyebags were under her pure black iris that were lifeless. They could've mistaken her for a ghost!

The two of them made eye contact with each other and [Name] were startled from how empty her eyes were and how it were devoid of any emotions. Her skin looks pale and sickly as if she hadn't been outside in a while.

"Hello..?" The girl meekly spoke breaking the staring contest the two of them have.

"Ah..! S-sorry for staring..I didn't mean to. It's just that I've never seen you around before, are you perhaps new?" They didn't know why in the loving fuck they were making small talk with a stranger.

"No..we share the same class last year but I don't really expect anybody to notice me anyways. Only she does.." She mumbled and her features scrunched up in pain at the mention of whoever the girl she had in mind.

They were concerned for her but didn't word it out in fear she would react negatively. They opted to give her a light pat on her shoulder with a smile,

"I'm sorry for not noticing you! I usually kept to myself and never bothered talking to others much"

"That's alright.. I would say the same for myself too" Her black irises soften at their attempt at conversing with her.

Sheepishly scratching their head [Name] then remembered that they haven't introduced themself yet.

"Right, I'm [Name] [Last Name]" They held out their hand for a handshake with a nervous smile streched across their lips.

The girl stared at them for a moment until she realised that this was all real and that somebody wanted to befriend her. Somebody besides her..

Before [Name] could retracted their hand and runs away from embarassment, she clasped it with hers and bowed.

"M-my name is Mi-yane Hat-ts-suki..! Pleased to meet you.." Miyane shouted quietly while gripping hard onto the [H/C] person's hand.

She could feel her eyes waters as fear crept up on her. Have she messes up her chance to befriend someone? Will they never talk to her again because how much of a mess she is? Is she truly going to be alone forever? Will sheㅡ

"Nice to meet you too Hatsuki-san, glad to be acquainted with you" [Name] replied and Miyane let out a breath she didn't know she held in.

"same goes for me! hehe.." She smiled politely and sighing, her smile immediately wiped from her face. A somber look taking place.

"I'm sorry [Last Name]-san.. I'm still not used to talking to someone other than her.."

[Name] wanted to ask Hatsuki about the girl that she kept mentioning but held their tounge to ask in another occasion or when she's comfortable enough to share.

'You just met her! You should'nt be prying about a potentially sensitive topic when it has only been a few minutes since you talk to her' They yelled to themselves in their head.

"It's alright Hatsuki-san, over the time I'm sure you're going to get used to it" They assured her and their words seemed to work as she calmed down.

Miyane was about to utter something when the bell rang, signalling the end of the class. [Name] suddely remembered that they had to meet up with their friends later.

"Apologies Hatsuki-san but I had to leave now, uhm I kinda have a meet up to attend" They finish placing their books away and lock their locker shut and faced the girl beside them.

Hatsuki closed her mouth and instead opting to nod to signal them to move along. [Name] sweatdropped at her way of communicating but wouldn't complained about it.

'It's better than nothing.. at least she made an effort to talk?' [Name] shook their head with a smile and bid her goodbye.

"I'm off then! See you later Hatsu-"

"..Miyane only please" She spoke up all of sudden, cutting them mid sentence.

They were quizzed on why she would allow them to call her by her first name. Although they certainly didn't mind it, it is still surprising.

"Well you can call me [Name] too! Now if you'd excuse me, Goodbye Miyane-san!" They waved at the bubblegum haired girl before taking their leave.

Hatsuki were left there with a smile threatening to crept up on her face. A warm feeling settled in her heart and stomach, it felt like how she feel when she's with 'Her' but somehow it's different..?

Perhaps this is how it feels when you befriend someone. She never had one in her life so she would never know.

Either way Miyane didn't mind it.

'This feels nice..'

«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────»

Another day had gone by and [Name] returned back to their usual day at school. Yesterday was an eventful one with them befriending a girl and hanging out with their friends right after.

Speaking of Hatsuki.. their friends had mentioned something interesting about the timid flower that might give [Name] a clue about this 'Her' person.

"You're talking to Hatsuki Miyane? For real?" One of their friend spoke after [Name] mentioned meeting Miyane.

"Yes? I know you're surprised because she's shy but-"

"No no we're surprised because she only talks to that one senior who's always around her until one day she's just GONE like that!" Maya, a sweet dear friend of them said while doing exaggerated hand gestures.

[Name] pondered for a moment. Could this 'Her' person that Miyane kept on mentioning be the senior who mysteriously disappears?.

"Not only that but it is rumored that Hatsuki-san had a crush on Celestina, the senior. Some said that Celestina senpai turned her down resulting in Hatsuki pushing her down the building in a rage" Sebby added, his hands furiously mashing the buttons on his console. Eyes trained onto the screen.

"Goodness me.. that last part of the rumor seem unbelievable and downright insane! I don't think Miyane would do something like that" [Name] defended their newfound friend.

The first half was believable as it is possible that Miyane had a crush on Celestina. However the last part would make Miyane a murderer if it was real.

But that could explain why no one seems to want to be around Hatsuki. The rumour made her out to be some sort of a monster that everyone naturally stayed away from.

'I should just ask Miyane directly for answers next time'

"All we're saying is to be careful around her. Keep your guards up since no one knows much about her, for all you know she could be a bad apple to be around" Mona concluded the talk with a stern look.

Sweatdropping at their friends, [Name] nodded stiffly. Sensing the sudden tense air in the room Maya being the life of the party that she is, shouted excitedly.

"Let's start this pizza partayy!"

"Sebby I hope you're ready to get crushed by me"

"I think not, old hag"

[Name] laugh at their friends exchanges and decided to join them. The group of friends enjoyed their night together filled with laughters, oblivious to the staring pair of black eyes.

«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────»

[muffindaddystyles]

22! angst to fluff pls love ur works <333

THANK YOU SM EVERYONE FOR REQUESTING HOPE YA'LL LIKE IT LOVE YAA !!!!!!

Harry hates one thing, most. That’s silence. Still, Y/N gave him a silent treatment knowing how much it drives him insane. It pinches him in throat in the most sickening way and makes him vicious about their fights more.

She has her reason too. Anyone would have a right to be mad if their boyfriend will be seen going to bars with models and cherry on top it turns out be his ex.

In his defence it was a PR stunt to keep the quietude about his dating life since Y/N and Harry’s relationship is private for Y/N's sake.

“You could’ve atleast told me, tha' you were going with her?” Was all she said. Confusion and insecurities and the images of her glued all over him mocked her in the most brutal way before she was distancing herself away from him.

He did anything in his will to bring her back to him, apologised and tried to shower her in kisses, making her brekkie and staying at home but she kept on pushing him away.

The problem wasn’t him. It was her. She blamed herself. He’s been nothing but so gentle with her and she’s towing him away like a used tissue.

Harry knew Y/N anxiety was always at bay and he didn’t want to worsen it by going public but it was biting him in arse as questions upon questions were thrown at him for past three years.

It's Saturday morning and she appears from the guest room after ages, the sight for sore eyes.

Harry’s eyes that were staring the tiled wall of kitchen flitters towards her and his gaze turns soft when he sees her drowned into one of his lilac sweater (she missed him so much and felt awfully hollow and cold sleeping in the bed that doesn’t smell like him at all; so she did what could comfort her best).

She looks so small and frail as if the demons of the lone bedroom swallowed her whole.

Heavy eyebags digging away the glimmer in her eyes, her cheekbones prominent and the pinkness of her eyes visible telling how much she’s been crying.

He turns expressionless on purpose when she meets his gaze and isn’t what she wanted? Some space to figure her thoughts out – but that polite gesture turned into a silent treatment from Harry’s side this time.

She knows that he’s more of a meanie in this game than her because he’s the one that never let things bottle up, his eyes gives away everything but right now they’re just murk of anger.

“Can we talk?” Her voice dim from crying for days and Harry elevates his shoulders carelessly, wrinkles on his forehead and his frown deep as he shrugs, “Dunno. Realized t’pick y'puppet back, your eminence?” His taunt hits her right in chest and she blinks the moisture in her eyes away looking down at her fingers fumbling with the frays of the hem.

He’s cloaked with sadness and dejection from her misbehaviour.

He’s the most petty when she’s the reason of his agony.

“I hate how much I care about, you.” He spats. Knuckles turning white from his grip around the marble counter and Y/N listens —— because good, she should now she’s out of her own bubble.

“How much I’ve told y'that no-one ‘n damn nothin’ could come between us —-" His tone dripping with malevolence and bitterness it tears Y/N up.

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep, Harry!!” She almost shouts. Shaky fingers contemplating to rip at her hair and her tears now shines at her cheeks, Harry elicits a flak taunting chuckle.

“See you’ve never trusted our love. Can y'fo’ once get outta y’head?” His own eyes glossy and his cheeks flushing rosy from the impact.

“You don’t want to bear what comes with lovin' me, don’t want me to cover up tha’ fo' you and you couldn’t spend a single day without doubting us,” He licks the salt away from his lips and his heart pauses a slow beat when Y/N's lips wobbles -- incoherent blabbers slipping past her swollen lips.

“What d'ya want then!?” The loud snap of his abrasive voice hitches her breath and she sobs out sorrowfully, “I just want you.” He sighs in defeat. Not really pondering over the severity and nuance of his words before speaking.

“Falling in love with you was the stupidest thing I’ve ever done in my life.” That was the last blow for Y/N. She gasps out a cry. Pupils bursting wide and her insides falls sick as the itching goosebumps pin-prickles at her skin.

Everything gets struck for a moment. Harry’s expression matches her as he realizes what damage he has caused and to confirm it a blaring thunder roars through the sky.

Y/N gulps the achy feeling in her throat and just nods silently retreating back through the steps that led her to him and he’s rushing behind her in fret only to get the door to be slammed on his face.

He curses himself. Hitting his forehead into the door frame, that was the lowest and most cheapest fucking insult you could’ve managed to throw her way you dick.

“Y/N. I’m —-...fuck.” He knows that a sorry will be too humiliating for the hurt he has caused her.

While, Y/N sits on the floor at the most corner of the room with her knees bunched up to her chest. His hurtful words rings in her skull and she stuffs her face into her elbow sobbing into it watching the bear Harry won for her in a carnival with doleful blurry vision.

Through his whole life the only decision he regrets is loving me – out of every stupid thing he thinks our love is the most stupidest, what if it's the end? How I'll live without him? It’s impossible.

Forgetting hurts the more than grieving and she’d never be able to do that.

Her toes numbs to tingles and she feels herself drowning somewhere into pitch darkness, her heart lurching ruefully at each knock Harry taps on the door and her stomach burns with acidy sting lungs knotting tight making her gasp for oxygen.

Her panic attack crawling up her body in beasty blood curling gashes and she attempts to shout a plead for Harry but white dots appears at the back of her eyelids tripping her into mountain of floor pillows.

It knocks the vase out and it shatters beside her head, “Y/N! Baby!” Harry pounds at the door and when doesn’t hear a response from her side he’s kicking it open harshly.

The lock unhinges as he rushes inside worrisome and his world shatters when he sees his lovie struggling for a breather, her petite body trembling and shaking with each gasp that bolts her throat more and she nearly begs for him to do something.

He’s falling beside her on the floor and embracing her pliant figure in his gentle hold, “’S okay. ‘S okay.” He croaks out wiping his own tears with the sleeve of his hoodie.

He rubs her tummy in soothing circles then trails his clammy palm up her chest and maintains an eye contact with her panicked ones. Her breath shudders when she tries to calm it back and her nails digs into his skin in doing so.

“Doing s'good f'me darling, yeah —-..yeah.” He bobs his head vigorously and assuring-ly stroking his thumb against her soaky cheek tenderly in pacifying motions.

Her breath lulls slowly back into a pattern and she jerks a little while inhaling a nourishing puff, “Take a breath honey, yes princess just like that.” He whispers speckling a tiny kiss to her forehead.

He pushes her up with a firm hand on her hip and into his lap murmuring sweet dottings into her ear, “Squeeze me hand if you could hear me baby.” He just wants to be reassured she’s doing okay –- his face crooked against her pulse point into her throat and she does so giving a weak squish to his fingers.

“Jeez.” He bumps her chin up with his head and touches their temples together – eskimo kissing her nose and her eyelids flutter when he pecks her mouth ever so lightly.

His insides are shaking anxiously from fright and he again hugs her warmly to feel her.

“’M sorry. So sorry lovie' didn’t –-.. didn’t mean to hurt ya, swear moppet was just upset tha’ y’were being so far from me. I love you so much precious ....." He presses his wet lips to the side of her head and buries his nose in her hair -- arms tightening around her waist.

".... and I don’t think lovin' you is stupid. Thinks tha’ ‘s the only best thing I’ve ever done in me life ... could never love anyone like that.” He mumbles cradling her sweaty face into his palms and patches soft kisses all over her face.

She hiccups a whimper. Nose quivering and lip wobbling — letting him kiss her pout and fists the flimsy fabric of his hoodie in her teensy hands compared to him, “’M sorry too. Sorry f'acting childish and not talking to you about it. I’m just scared I’m getting too obsessed with the idea of us and it’ll ruin us pathetically.”

“Wait. Wait woah baby ...” He grabs her gently with shoulders and pulls her back from him, “’S tha’ why you were trying to live off all by yourself?” He asks politely a bit glum she was enduring all of that herself.

When she tries to hide her face out of timidness he hooks his thumb under her chin and highers it up, “Y/N.”

“Thinks you love me so intensely?” She sniffs nodding in agreement and he smiles sweetly.

“Then fuckin' do it silly. Why d'ya think I wouldn’t want that lovlin? I want to be so loved by my sweet baby.” He almost falls back when she slings her arms around the nape of his neck and brings him down for a cuddle.

“I love you so much my Angel.” He murmurs with his face squished into her neck and fills his lungs with her warm vanillay scent.

She rubs her cheek up and down his chest like an affectionate starved puppy then stops where his heart lays under the trap of bones and kisses it three times.

Her love language. When she isn’t able to utter something she’s always appreciating him with loving actions and at the moment she did the same to exchange the sentiment.

Three kisses to heart means, “I love you so much it aches me.” He immediately catches it and pecks her nose.

"I know bub, I know."