#expecting the whole bunch to fucking die by the end of it please and thank youuuu ♡♡♡

[littleragondin]

Have to wake up in 3h30 but still stayed up to finish bingin dead friend forever, we are truly making brilliant decisions in this house.

(I have no regrets i enjoyed every minute of it 😌)

[oh-my-may]

LET'S TALK HSR PENACONY 2.1 (or rather, have my impressions and thoughts on the main quest and some other stuff)

First of all, I went out of it with so many thoughts and emotions. This is not gonna be spoiler free (duh).

ACHERON IS SO FUN TO PLAY. Like, really really fun. Finally Simulated Universe is not an annoying pain anymore, and much quicker too. Thanks to a good friend of mine her relics aren't too bad either. She's already so fun to play with Black Swan, can't wait for a Kafka rerun now 💀

Aa for the story now: I FUCKING KNEW MIKHAIL WAS THE WATCHMAKER. I KNEW IT. Now to wait for them to confirm that Misha is connected to him, either as a ghost of his past self or a child or some sort. It's the only way.

It's also really refreshing to see that HSR is giving 4star characters significant roles in the story. First it was Tingyun, now it's Gallagher (and maybe Misha? I'll die on this hill).

Loved the pacing. Story was quite long and lots of gameplay but didn't feel overwhelming at all, probably because we didn't just stick to the MC the whole time. The characters split up and we didn't just follow the express crew but also Aventurine, I really loved that. It felt so dynamic and immersive.

WELT AND ACHERON INTERACTION. BRO. The way I gasped the whole time. We still don't have a canon confirmation of how Raiden Mei and Acheron or just generally HI3rd and HSR are connected but it's sp clear that Acheron is by far the closest connection yet. So sp excited to find out more about this. Raiden Mei, I'll love you in every universe.

Aventurine and Ratio are also very interesting to me. What does Ratio gain by involving himself in all of this? What does he get out of it? Anyway, their little journey through the mansion was nice. GIGANTIC RATIO. The kinda stuff my dreams are made of tbh.

Generally the whole Aventurine story got me right from the beginning. He's generally one of the most interesting characters to me (although this game has plenty of them). I gotta admit of course I was suspicious of him (as one should be of all Penacony characters) but I liked him nevertheless. This patch supported my feelings, my GOD HE xkdjjdjdjd. The way I cried. Since I played the story so late ofc I saw some spoilers/screenshots of his backstory but I never expected it to hit me this hard. Just wow. His ending, too. It's so bitter. Kinda hope we get to see him again, since he'a mot really dead, right? Just in some limbo.

His boss fight was really something. Not a lot of different patterns, but I still had to try a bunch of different teams, since you're kinda fucked even with just a single single target character in your party. Had to unbench Clara, and I gotta say, she came through for me. I might not have used the most meta team, but it worked soooo...

And just as I was glad I had managed the fight they hit you with that big cut scene, woah. AND THEN WITH THE FIREFLY SCENE? AND SUNDAY????

First of all, apparently it was common knowledge among the community since last patch that Sam was Firefly. Yeah, I gwt it bc of the leaks and stuff. But I'm just so confused as to HOW. Like HOW and WHY and just generally HUH. I can't wait for them to explain this connection (if you're reading this and you wanna spoil me with non-confirmed stuff then leave it, please, I might as well wait another 3 weeks).

And then Gallagher and Sunday... Just as I was admiring Sunday's beauty because he might legit just be one of the most gorgeous male character designs... THEY KILL HIM. When I tell ypu I was SHOOK. Mouth agape and all. Didn't know what to do. What a cliffhanger.

Now I don't have a real theory as to what I think will happen. If I remember correctly they said the main story will stretch until 2.3, right? I really wonder what else will happen, the story already seemed so huge this patch and I really wonder how it'll conclude. There's still so many questions and stories. Might add on to this post later when I have more thoughts.

Also Aventurine's banner just dropped but as of writing this I haven't pulled yet. Might add a little post later about it.

For now, have some screenshots I took during the story:

ALSO I GOT AVENTURINE. SECOND 50/50 WIN IN A ROW IN THIS GAME HAVE I FINALLY BROKEN THE CURSE. Now for the long and treacherous road of farming his trace mats and relics ... Since I never really prefarm 🥲

A pic I took in my excitement. Forgot the screenshot button exists.

[perpetualexistence]

Tell us about your other Alenoaheather AU(s). I know you have them. 🔫

- Totally not Ophe

Hello completely random anon whose identity will forever be a mystery!

See, with the way you've phrased this, you've actually opened yourself up to a few options. I'll tell you a little bit about each one and you can tell me which one you want to learn more about first.

Currently unnamed G/T Alenoaheather

Definitely the most detailed AU of the bunch. It's got backstories and character arcs for each of the three. Probably the best way to describe it is Urban fantasy since none of them are (completely) human, but they pretty much live in a modern setting.

It does get dark at times. Think Beastars-adjacent in terms of vibes. Including the murder bits. But it's mostly self-defense or being forced into it, so take that as you will. I will say that it's nowhere near the levels of toxic relationships that something like the Sea Monster AU has. And they do actually improve as people. These three still get drama mind you, but it's from keeping secrets rather than being genuinely manipulative. ...Well. Too manipulative. It does have Alejandro and Heather in it. But it's got fluff moments because fluffy giant/tiny dynamics are precious and must be preserved at all costs.

It's got Alejandro who's a giant-shifter able to grow even larger than most other giant-shifters thank to his Burromuerto heritage. The Burromuertos are a completely upstanding giant-shifter family and definitely don't have any incredibly fucked up family traditions they expect Alejandro to continue.

Noah's a were-mongoose. Werefolk come in a large variety, though mongoose is on the far more uncommon side. Unlike most werefolk, this kid genius actually figured out a way to not completely give into his instincts during full moons. This has absolutely no negative repercussions on his wellbeing.

Heather who's a giant-shifter hybrid unable to grow thanks to her human heritage from her father's side. She's the only one of her siblings unable to grow. She definitely doesn't have a complex about this. But she has managed to find her own way of making herself just as much of a physical threat as her two boyfriends. (Aka the day I take away from Heather's inherent badassery is the day I die.)

Serial Killer AU

It's exactly what it sounds like. With exactly the vibes the name implies. Definitely the darker one. They're just a thriving villain throuple with a body count. It's also mostly Noah-focused so far as I haven't figured out Alejandro or Heather's motivations.

Noah stumbles across a body of a serial killer spree, only to be the first to realize that one serial killer is actually two. Curiosity leads him to investigate...but not for the reasons you'd think.

(For this one that's pretty much all I can share before just going into the whole AU)

And then, on the completed side since might as well dump all the Alenoaheather AUs:

Noah and the Beanstalk

Another giant/tiny AU! This one's actually got its own post already. I don't really have anything else that I didn't already mention in that post. But it's my blog, so I'll advertise my own AUs as I please!

Collab AUs

The Royal Court AU

Originally named The Lords In Black AU because it was originally inspired by me watching an animatic of The Summoning from Nerdy Prudes Must Die. Then it evolved into something far beyond that where the name doesn't seem quite right anymore.

It's got Alenoaheather as the worst teens at school and unashamed about it. ...Until Alejandro goes missing, and nobody else really seems to care. Leaving Heather and Noah to investigate and try their best not to be next.

They fail, but hey, at least they get cool eldritch powers out of it!

This AUs also dark because the premise is them being kidnapped to be used as sacrifices. And it's got plenty of eldritch horror in it. The posts for it are scattered because they ended up going into two separate reblog chains with @total-drama-brainrot and @ur-local-brown-multifandomist. If you look up 'lords in black au' on my blog you should be able to find most of it. I'm going to just centralize it for ease of organization one day. It'll just be. You know. Effort.

Also, @ur-local-brown-multifandomist is currently making a fic for it! It's their first one, so feel free to check it out.

Fake Dating Alenoaheather AU

This one's a collab AU between me and @total-drama-brainrot, a person you have never met because you are a completely anonymous anon. Noah gets caught in between Heather and Alejandro's attempts to make the other jealous by each making him pretend to be their boyfriend. Shenanigans and drama ensue. The posts for this are also scattered and tagged on both our blogs, and one day we might make a fic about it. For now, there actually is someone already making a fic about it that you can feel free to read!

I still can't believe two different people decided to start making fic of AUs I helped create. It's wild, and I'm incredibly touched.

"Why are all of these AUs except for one dark in at least some way?"

I honestly couldn't tell you exactly why my brain works the way it does. It just decided that the two canon villains and one-villain coded teenager deserve to be at least a little feral. As a treat.

Maybe one day I'll have an AU with them that's not so dark. That day will be a surprise to us all.

But yeah, that's all of the Alenoaheather AUs I got! The first two I'm more than happy to go into more detail for if you ask!

[osarina]

CARINAAAA HAPPY BIRTHDAY🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎊🎊🎊🎊🎊🎊‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️

I WISH YOU THE HAPPIEST, BEST OF THE BEST, MOST WONDERFUL BIRTHDAY EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sooo, somehow I managed to not notice you answering my ask?? Literally how, I have been stalking your blog, idk how I missed it 😔😔

But anywayyy I'm going to yap to you abt my trip to Vienna since you kindly asked, and I have yapped so much to my bestie abt it, she hit me </33 😢😢

Soo, it was a 10 days and 9 night vacation and it started with a 12+ h long car travelling. 12+ h. And i forgot my headphones at home. It was horrible. I will never forget them at home again.

We (aka me, my mom, my dad, my older brother and his gf) stayed at my aunt's. But, the problem was that, that there was only one (1) bedroom. Which my aunt and my uncle used, so they slept there now too. Me and my mom slept on a inflatable mattress, my brother and his gf slept on the couch and my dad slept on a mattres on the balcony 🤣🤣

But as every family vacation, everyone argued with everyone so it was quite funny (for me at least)

We went to 3 different beach, we walked almost the whole city, we visited the Schönbrunn Palace, we went to a big as fuck zoo-like park, the swans chased me, we went to the amusement park where I tried almost everyone. There were dance thingies at night, we went and watched those too and went to 2 concert. So, basically we did everything expect resting. Which was, btw, the whole vacation's main essence.

Anyway, subject change-

I hope you period will or is kind to you too. Oh how I love being a woman 😔

Btw Rinaaaaa

I had a very very very bad dream today ☹☹

I'm currently reading a dark era/15 era dazai x oc fic on wattpad and I dreamt abt ittt

But it was not some lovely-dovely dream, no, i had to have a damn nightmare.

So, I outline what it was:

Me and I think 16? yrs old dazai were dating and in a happy relationship and dazai bought some ultra luxury house which had a whole floor that was a pool. And there were different slides that were life-threatening. And there were many ppl there as well, I think it was a party or something. And the whole day I was in the pool and somehow I got a very very bad feeling. And somehow I found out from Dazai's friends (who were not odasaku, ango or chuuya) that he was CHEATING ON ME. AND WHEN I WENT TO FIND OUT THERE WAS SOME BITCH HUGGING AND TRYING TO KISS HIM. AND WHEN I CALMLY (seriously, i was actually calm. but how, idk) HE JUST IGNORED ME????? LIKE THE FUCK????? But at least he didn't let that slut kiss him. But didn't said no to her or tried to take her hands off him. And then I broke up with him.

And now time skip-

I somehow ended up trying out one of the deadly slides and he sat behind me. It was roller coaster and a slide mix, i can't explain better. And when I thought I'm gonna die (seriously, THAT THING WAS HORRIFYING) I accidently screamed his name and THAT MF IGNORED ME AGAIN. HE WAS RIGHT BEHIND ME. I WAS SHOUTING WITH ALL I HAD. THE AUDACY?!?!?

And then time skip again-

Somehow me, dazai and a bunch of ppl were in an underground tunnel that was made of rocks I think. And we had to climb up idk why. And when I asked everyone to please help me EVERYONE DIDN'T GIVE A FUCK AND OSAMU WHO WAS RIGHT NEXT TO ME STARTED TO CLIMB FASTER IGNORING ME 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

I hate this dream. This was my first dazai dream AND HE FUCKING CHEATS ON ME?!?!?!??!?!

Anyway, so sorry for this enormous ask, I'm a yapper at heart. And sorry for any mistakes again, I was diagnosed yesterday with dyslexia 😔😔😔

Have a fantastic day, much love,

- 🍄

AHHHHHH MUSHROOM NONNIE THANK YOU SO MUCH I ADORE YOU ILY <3333

OMG i am SOOOO jealous - i was supposed to study abroad there over the summer during college but it got cancelled because of covid </33 i was so upset over it. i would simply DIE if i didn't have my headphones for a 12h car ride. AND IM DYING OVER UR DAD SLEEPING ON THE BALCONY LOLLL THAT'S SO FUNNY

KAFHAIUSDFHSDFHSDUH NOT THE SWANS CHASING YOU HAHAHAAHAHAHHHHH I'M SORRY MY FAVORITE THING EVER IS WHEN PEOPLE GET CHASED MY BIRDS HAHAHAHAH IM ACTUALLY CRYING

NAURRRRRR MUSHROOM NONNIE </3333 if the cheating wasn't bad enough the blatant ignoring when you were in dangerous situations would have actually sent me over the edge LOL that's awful i would actually cry.

BUT don't you worry our dazai would never cheat on you. he simply thinks you're the most lovely and treasured person to have ever come into his life, that man would rather DIE than look at anyone but you. that was simply an IMPOSTER dazai.

DON'T APOLOGIZE, I LOVE IT HAHAHAHAH i will always be the listener to people's yapper, i love listening to people yap

[aro-pancake]

So Monday night we watched Pacific Rim.

Then, yesterday we met up with a friend, who mentioned to mr Pancake that Uprising exists. He got curious, so we watched it.

There is so much wrong with that movie.

I'll put a cut here because a) it's Spoilers if you haven't seen either movie, and b) it's a long, long rant.

I would die happily without remembering that movie even existed. So, thank you, friend, for reminding me of it. 😒

First things first, they're ignoring the established lore. On the words of Ron Pearlman, Kaiju bone sells for 500 dollars a pound, so why are there still so many carcasses laying about?

Also, the war ended 10 years ago! Why are Jagers still in production? The whole shebang of the first movie was that the program was ending, and they were given a final shot at the Jagers before the walls were done. The governments didn't want to keep the Jagers then, they sure as fuck wouldn't want to keep them after the war!

(Attack on Titan looking kinda weird.)

And why do they have Jagers strolling around casually? Those things are heavy and expensive to maintain. They would stay in docks until they were needed, make quick work of the Kaiju and return to docking. What's fueling the Mark VI Jagers?

Why wasn't Jake ever even mentioned in the first movie? Where did the kid come from? He just popped up and we gotta swallow it now? And this kid wouldn't be poor! His dad was Marshal Stacker Pentecost, ffs! His sister is Mako Mori! His family are all high ranking war heroes!

Then... There's the kids. The biggest human issue we had in the first movie was actual tension between the GROWN UP pilots, who were dealing with the apocalypse incoming their way. Now, we have kids fighting over who's getting the top bunk.

And don't (please do) get me started on the drift. First movie? They were all family. We had two Russian siblings, Chinese triplets, father and son, twins... People you already share memories with, what makes it easier to drift.

The second movie? They tossed a bunch of random kids together and expected them to drift on day fucking one! Not even Mako and Raleigh managed to drift on day one, and he was ready to give her the world the second she showed up. They actually spent time together before attempting to drift. Talked. Got to know eachother for a couple days.

Yes, sure, there was the impending apocalypse knocking at their doors so they had to speed run a drift compatibility. But it made it believable. The cadets on Uprising didn't have to deal with the world ending.

That Chinese lady? Boss, have the whole "I hate repeating myself" thing? Did they want to divert us into thinking she was the BBEG when Newt (Charlie Day, my second favourite character in the first movie) was acting completely out of character and LITERALLY DATING A FUCKING KAIJU BRAIN? LIKE THAT WASN'T INCRIMINATING ENOUGH?

[deep breaths] ok. I'm calm.

And did they want the boss lady to be a strong female character? She was annoying. They already had a strong female character. Yes. Mako Mori.

I'm honestly glad she died when she did, before they had the chance to destroy her character for good.

And why did they present the solution (Jagers still in commission) then the problem (Obsidian Avenger/return of the Kaijus) to justify the solution?

It's been 10 years since the war! The world wouldn't still be in shambles!

I would have liked that movie if:

"look, we built some Jagers again to put as a display/just in case, and transformed the Shatterdome into a wartime museum."

"oh no. The Kaijus are back! Who can help us now?"

Put together a ragtag band of fighters, trained by Mako and Raleigh (happily married, thank you. Also, please feel free to send some fluff fics of them my way), and they have to help new pilots to find their way into the drift. There would be a lot of awestruck new pilots, being like "omg, we're being trained by them!", while others are like "what do you know? Your war is over." And they have to wrangle the kids to get a fighting force to go and destroy the Kaijus.

That would make it a better movie. Not necessarily a good one, but one where we're willing to suspend our disbelief and fall back into the amazing lore of Pacific Rim.

Yes. I like the lore of Pacific Rim. Sue me.

ETA: it was such a bad movie, I only remember the names of two characters, Mako because Mako, and Jake, because he's supposed to be the main character.

[bye-bye-firefly]

Alright, I just finished Penny’s playthrough of The Last of Us. That was so good. I had heard some stuff about the ending beforehand so it wasn’t as big of a shock as it would’ve been if I hadn’t but like I just wasn’t expecting it to be like that. I’m still in kind of a daze. I’m really impressed. I haven’t really had time to figure out all my thoughts on the ending but like I definitely agreed 100% with what Penny was saying. Ellie should’ve been told what was going on and Joel shouldn’t have lied. And like yeah, it did feel like Joel was saving Ellie for his own sake rather than for Ellie’s. Also, the beginning was so well done! Like, the whole thing with Sarah at the beginning like actually almost made me tear up. Like I could feel that pressurey feeling behind my eyes. I know that probably doesn’t sound like a lot but like I’m one of those people where like it’s very hard for fictional stories to make me at all close to tears. I still get totally attached to characters and can feel emotionally annihilated by the events of a story, I just usually stare at the screen or pages or whatever I’m looking at like it’s a monster though. So it really surprised me that a character who I barely know anything about was able to get that much of a reaction out of me. I think it’s just something about that scene.

Anyway, thanks for recommending Penny’s playthrough! She was very entertaining and made me genuinely laugh a bunch! I loved the bits, not to mention watching her attempt to hunt a deer and fail for like 15 minutes straight was absolutely delightful. Also very much enjoyed hearing her mess with her watch thingy on stream. Both are definite highlights.

I’m very excited for when I look at Part 2, I’m also very excited to watch the tv show. I really hope it’s a good adaptation. Thanks again for the recommendation and thanks for writing a The Last of Us DRV3 fanfic and talking about it since I’m not sure at what point in time I would’ve actually ended up looking for a playthrough to watch of the game otherwise!

yeah the intro to the last of us is like. fuck man . i remember playing through that and just sobbing that intro is so good. and penny is SOOO fucking right literally the only person i trust to play tlou2 EVERRR i know for a fact that she gets it like i get it and really thats all that matters. shes the best. her videos are all awesome im so sad it took me so long to get into watching ALL of her stuff and not just the fandubs. the parts that made me really cry were of course when sarah dies, when sam and henry die, when ellie rants at joel (everyone who ive ever loved has either DIED. or LEFT ME. everyone...fucking except for you! so don't tell me i'd be better off with someone else, because the truth is that i would just be more scared.), when joel got hella hurt and ellie had to bring him out of the university, when ellie killed david, when ellie nearly drowned, AND! at the end of the game. that final scene kills me. i feel very much for tlou and really everything all the time. really

although its not NECESSARY. i still would recommend looking at left behind <3 SORRY sorry i just love left behind so much there is so much in left behind that i just die over everyday i think about the events of left behind and i die and i die and i die. i think about i got you babe and i DIEEEEE its EVERYTHING to me. FOREVER!!! penny also played left behind and its super fucking funny also there was one part where i had to pause the vod i was laughing so hard

i cannot WAIT for penny to play part 2 because she said she liked it and she had already played it before and i was like omg...this is gonna be fucking awesome VERY fucking excited. i have to tell you. when you get into part 2. PLEASE keep an open mind ive lost too many people to the dudebro gamers who dont like part 2 i love part 2 i LOVE it. i get so sads every time i see someone who doesnt like part 2 and thinks it made no sense like IT DOES!!! BUT IT DOES!!! my world my star my shining star shining so brightly

thank YOU for looking into tlou its my favourite video game series EVERRRR it shaped me into who i am today and it is my World. im still getting through writing the first chapter but im literally having so much fun with it its UNIMAGINABLE. im so excited to post it i dont CARE if no one asked for it IM MAKING IT. but seriously no one asked for this there was like only one person who made a last of us crossover in the drv3 tag 😭 if no one is making this for me...ill make it for MYSELF!!

[honeypiehotchner]

That’s When (Hotch x Fem!Reader) -- part three of Bye Bye, Baby

Part three has arrived! Guys, this was so much fun to write and this part made me so weepy. Thank y’all so much for reading <3

Loosely based on “That’s When” by Taylor Swift ft. Keith Urban xx

Summary: Juliet wants to meet Aaron, so you set it up. Things go better than you were expecting.

Warnings: angst, happy ending!

Word count: 3.7k this time EYE

Bye Bye, Baby (part one) || Don’t You (part two) || Hotch Masterlist

You said, “I know,” when I said I need some time, need some space/to think about all of this

You pour the coffee Aaron got you down the drain. You took maybe two sips on your way home.

Juliet is still with Dannie, but she’s on her way now to drop her off. And once Jules is asleep, you’ll be filling Dannie in on everything.

Easier said than done, because Juliet all but refuses to fall asleep.

“Munchkin,” you sigh. “You have school tomorrow.”

“M’not tired.”

You give her a look.

“What’s wrong, Mommy?” She asks out of nowhere. “You look sad.”

“I’m okay, baby,” you whisper, even though you nearly start crying. “Get some sleep. I’ll see you in the morning, okay?”

“French toast for breakfast?”

You chuckle, tapping her nose gently. “French toast. You got it.”

“Love you bunches,” she murmurs, already falling asleep.

You lean over and kiss her forehead. “Love you, munchkin.”

Juliet keeps her eyes closed as you stand and turn off the light, and you don’t doubt that she’s fast asleep by the time you pull her door closed.

Dannie is waiting on the couch, two glasses of wine already poured.

“You know me too well,” you laugh, taking your glass from her. “Thanks.”

“Don’t thank me, it’s your wine,” Dannie grins.

“Right.”

Dannie watches you stare at your wine. Something you never do.

“How’d it go?” She asks. “It looks like it went bad.”

You snort. “Well, it wasn’t great.”

You watched me go/And I knew my words were hard to hear

“Oh boy.” Dannie shifts her body and faces you on the couch, her legs bent underneath her. “Go on.”

“His first question was if she’s his.”

Dannie scrunches her nose in disgust, an expression Jules has picked up from her. “What did you say?”

“That she’s mine, but he is her dad,” you exhale shakily. “I forgot she has his dimples, too.”

Dannie smiles sadly. “Honey…”

“Yeah, it was bad,” you admit. “It was so easy to forget all of that when I was angry and when I was too busy being pregnant,” you joke. “Seeing him just opened that door again.”

You swirl your wine for a second. “He said he wants to meet her. I told him I’d have to ask her first.”

“That’s good,” Dannie nods.

“How do I even bring that up?” You ask, defeated. “And what if she says no?”

“Then she says no,” Dannie shrugs her shoulders. “Then life goes back the way it was.”

You take in a deep breath. “Is it wrong that I kind of want her to say no?”

“I think that’s very motherly of you,” Dannie smiles. “You’ve protected her so well, I hope you know that.”

“I’ve tried.” You take a big sip of wine before your next sentence. “He asked me for a second chance.”

Dannie blinks. “Seriously?”

You nod.

“Did you tell him about the phone calls? He’s ignored you this whole time and now just because he realized he’s a father, he wants a second chance?” Dannie scoffs loudly. “Maybe I want her to say no, too. I hate men.”

You nearly inhale your wine in laughter. “You and me both.”

+++

As it turns out, bringing up Aaron to Juliet is easy. She asks you the next night why you still look sad, and you use it to bring him up.

“I’m not sad, munchkin, I’m just thinking really hard about something.”

Juliet furrows her eyebrows. “What?”

You slide off the couch to sit on the floor next to her where she’s coloring a picture of Elsa. “Remember how I told you that your dad and I don’t talk anymore?”

It was the easiest way to explain Aaron’s absence when Juliet started to ask about it. It was hard to think about because you and Aaron were never married, he didn’t die, and to make matters worse, he had no idea Juliet existed.

She nods, picking up a blue marker. “Yeah, you said adults have to stop talking to each other sometimes.”

“That’s right,” you nod. “Sometimes it’s better for us if we don’t speak. But sometimes, after a while, we can start talking again.”

“Okay.”’

“Well, your dad and I have started talking again,” you pause. “And he said he’d like to meet you. But only if you want to.”

Juliet thinks for a moment, then shrugs, switching to an orange marker. “Okay.”

“Yeah?” You ask, just to be sure. “Where do you want to go?”

“I can pick?”

“Sure can. Wherever you want.”

“Hmm,” she taps her chin for emphasis, and you try hard not to laugh. “What about McDonalds in the park?”

It’s a somewhat tradition of yours to get McDonalds, then go to her favorite park and have a picnic. It’s one of her favorite things to do, so you should’ve known.

“I love that,” you smile. “What about this Saturday?”

“Mhm!” She nods. “Can Dannie come, too?”

“I’ll ask her, but I don’t see why not.”

Juliet is completely satisfied with this answer and goes right back to coloring Elsa.

You chuckle quietly. Kids.

+++

It’s almost noon by the time you get Juliet in the car. And surprisingly, you were the one running behind today. Juliet was ready and sitting on your bed, watching you get dressed before you had even done your hair.

Now, though, you’ve picked up Dannie, and the three of you are headed to McDonalds.

Juliet hasn’t mentioned meeting Aaron once this morning, but she has talked about McDonalds at least four times now.

“How are you holding up?” Dannie asks while Juliet is occupied singing along to ‘Let It Go.’

“Nervous,” you admit quietly. “Thank you for coming.”

“I wouldn’t turn down McDonalds any day,” Dannie scoffs, then turns around to Juliet. “Are you excited?”

Listening to the two of them ramble makes you smile wide, and the drive to the park feels infinitely shorter.

You told Aaron you’d text him when you get there, so he can come over. He said he’d already be there, but for what reason you have no clue.

All you care about is setting out the blanket and getting Juliet to eat her food before she plays with her new Frozen toy.

Truthfully, you’re expecting him to text you and say he called on a case. Not that you blame him because you’ve been there, the BAU is unpredictable like that. But you wouldn’t be surprised.

However, you are surprised when Aaron jogs over.

Yes, jogs.

In shorts, a t-shirt, and sneakers, with sweat clinging to his hair, he jogs over. And you lose all semblance of reality. There’s cotton in your mouth. Good fucking god, he looks good.

“When the hell did you start running?” It's the first thing that comes out of your mouth, and it’s complete word vomit.

Juliet gasps dramatically. “Bad word, Mommy.”

Dannie tries and fails to hold in her laugh.

“You’re right,” you chuckle. “Bad word.”

Aaron, with a smile, answers your question. “The BAU is having a triathlon. I’m training for it.”

“When is it?” You ask without entirely meaning to. You hate how easily you fall right back into conversation with him, how easily he makes you dumbfounded just by his looks.

“In a few weeks, so I’ve got some time,” he breathes. “Mind if I sit?”

You shake your head, scooting over. “Here, I got some nuggets.” You ordered enough for the two of you to share, mostly to save money, but now you’re realizing the implications of it.

You don’t have time to think about that, though, because Juliet has been staring at Aaron for a few moments.

“Munchkin?” You ask. Dannie nudges Juliet’s arm.

“Didn’t you hit us in the grocery store?”

Dannie bursts into laughter then, unable to control it this time, and thankfully, Aaron laughs, too.

“I did,” he nods. “I’m really sorry about that.”

“It’s okay, Aaron,” Juliet says, going right back to her nuggets, sandwiching fries in between two pieces of chicken.

His eyebrows raise and he looks at you.

All you can do is shrug. “She forgets nothing.”

From there, lunch is...uneventful.

Juliet is more focused on playing than she is talking to Aaron, but thankfully, she doesn’t seem upset by him being here.

Dannie asks him a couple questions, mostly standard ones. “What’s the BAU like? I bet the hours suck. You’re unit chief, too, right?”

Aaron answers everything politely, and seems mostly at ease.

After a while, you begin to relax, too.

You have no choice, really, when Juliet feels comfortable to ask questions like, “Are you really my dad? Why weren’t you talking to my mommy?”

Aaron handles the questions like a pro. “I am. Your mom and I needed some time to ourselves, so that’s why we weren’t talking.”

“Adults are weird,” she says, but she seems satisfied with his answers and even hands him her Olaf toy. “I’m gonna go swing.”

Aaron chuckles and sets Olaf in the shade of his leg. “I’ll make sure he doesn’t melt.”

Juliet tilts her head. “He’s a toy, he won’t melt.”

This time you’re the one incapable of holding in your laughter.

“Dannie, come on!” Juliet yells out, giggling when Dannie nearly trips over her feet to stand up.

As they run off, you start picking up Juliet’s trash and stuffing it back in the bag.

“Here, I’ll run it over to the trash can.”

You turn your head to Aaron with a smirk. “You’ll run it over there? Promise?”

He gives you a look.

He doesn’t actually take it over to the trash can because he goes completely still, then says, “She has my eyes.”

You take a deep breath. “Yeah. She does. Your dimples, too.”

He smiles. “Thank god she got your nose, though.”

“What?” You whip your head around. “She has your nose.”

“She does not,” he argues. “And as I said, thank god.”

“Oh, shut up, I love your nose.”

His smile is never-ending. “Really?”

You move on from it quickly. “Thanks for meeting us today.”

“Thank you for letting me.”

You nod slowly, deciding to blurt out what’s been eating at you. “You know, if— If you’re doing this just to get a second chance with me, please don’t.”

“I’m not.”

“Because I don’t need that kind of stress, and Juliet doesn’t either—”

I said, “I know,” when you said I did you wrong/made mistakes, and put you through all of this

“Y/N,” Aaron’s hand rests gently on your arm, getting your attention. He lifts it when you stop talking. “I’m not. I’m doing this because I want to be a part of her life, as her dad. I wasn’t there for her, or you, and I’m sorry. I just want to make it right. Let me make it up to you — to her.”

You stare at him closely, watching. “You mean that?”

He nods. “I do. And I’m so sorry my actions in the past made you think differently of me.”

“I just don’t want her to get hurt,” you murmur. “She’s my baby.”

“I know,” Aaron says. “I know.”

+++

Co-parenting with Aaron is surprisingly easy. Or maybe he makes it easy.

Every Saturday, you and Juliet meet him in the park for a picnic lunch after he’s done training for the triathlon. Sometimes you get there early — which happens nearly every week as Juliet becomes more eager to see him — and you get to cheer Aaron on as he finishes his run.

Dannie comes sometimes, but the few times that she hasn’t have been just as pleasant.

Aaron keeps his word. He does this to spend time with Juliet as her dad, and he doesn’t make any advances on you. The two of you don’t even hug at the end of the afternoon, but Juliet has taken to running and jumping in his arms.

She’s growing more and more attached to him every week, and you hate the dread that you feel. So far, you’ve been lucky. Aaron’s cases have been during the week, so he hasn’t missed a single Saturday — yet.

It’s one of the reasons you are grateful for your transfer at the time four years ago. If you had been in as unpredictable of a job as the BAU when you were pregnant, or when Juliet was born, you have no idea how you would’ve done it. Your job now is a perfect 8 to 5, sometimes 6, but that’s only been a handful of times in the past four years.

Juliet is used to you being there every day. And now, she’s getting used to seeing Aaron every week. You’re just bracing yourself for the time when he has a case and won’t be able to make it.

You try not to think that far ahead, but you can’t help yourself. You were once an agent under him. You know just how crazy the BAU can get. You know exactly what to expect when it gets busy.

Which is why you don’t understand the feelings that are growing inside of you.

You told him he wasn’t getting a second chance — at least not right now. Because you don’t have it in you, and you don’t want to do that to Juliet if it doesn’t work out.

But that was before things started working out.

And you said, “When can I come back?”

Before he never missed a single Saturday. Before he insisted on a birthday dinner when he realized her birthday was a few months ago. Before she started running into his arms. Before he started lifting her up and spinning her around, listening to her giggles as she squealed, “Mommy! I’m flying!” Before she fell asleep on the blanket in the park, and he moved over to shield her from the sun, all while still talking to you.

Now, you don’t know what to do. It sounds awful, but you didn’t expect him to prove himself this well.

You’ve always loved him. That is easy enough to recognize and admit. But you never imagined feeling this way again.

“Mommy?” Juliet pushes your bedroom door open a little.

You sit up, patting your bed. “Good morning, munchkin. C’mere.”

She climbs into bed and right to your side, and you spread the blanket over her, letting her snuggle into your side.

After a moment, you think she’s asleep, but then she whispers, “Are you and dad going to stop talking again?”

You freeze. Up until now, Juliet has called him “Aaron.” Obviously, she knows Aaron is her dad, but she’s never called him that.

“Why do you ask that, baby?” You murmur, kissing the top of her head.

“I don’t want you guys to stop talking again. I like hanging out with him.” She buries her head further into your chest. “He makes me laugh.”

Tears fill your eyes. “He makes me laugh, too.”

“I know,” she smiles into your shirt. “He looks at you a lot.”

“What?”

“When you’re not looking,” she whispers, half-asleep again. “He smiles a lot. He has dimples like me.”

“He does,” you smile softly, wiping your tears away.

+++

The day of the triathlon, Juliet is more than eager to get to the park to cheer Aaron on.

You, on the other hand, feel like you could throw up from the thought of it.

Aaron told you the rest of the team will be there, and you’re grateful for the heads up, but you’re also nervous as shit. You haven’t seen them since your send off party. You haven’t texted with Penelope and Derek in...probably two years now.

He said he didn’t tell the team you’re coming because he didn’t want you to feel pressured, but he also warned you that the team has been questioning him nonstop if he’s seeing someone. He said he’s told them that he isn’t, but of course, they think he’s lying.

Dannie comes with to the triathlon, mainly because Juliet asked her to. It’s been a few days since Juliet has seen Dannie because she was out of town for work, but now she’s back, so Juliet wants her around all the time again.

You’re grateful for Dannie’s presence once again to calm your nerves and offer distractions at every second.

Surprisingly, you don’t see the team anywhere when you arrive, so you, Juliet, and Dannie set up your chairs and blanket peacefully. It’s a while before Aaron will be over here for the run, the last part of the triathlon, so Juliet breaks out her coloring book at your and Dannie’s feet.

You and Dannie spend the wait while idly talking, and after about an hour, the first cheers begin echoing out.

Juliet perks up with the noise. “Is that dad?”

Dannie’s eyes snap to yours and she mouths, “Did she?”

You nod, smiling stupidly. It brings you way more joy to hear Juliet freely call Aaron her dad. Way more joy than you thought.

“Maybe,” you stand up and reach for Juliet’s hand. “Let’s go see.”

Juliet grabs your hand and starts tugging you toward the front, and Dannie follows with a laugh, watching you get drug away by a four-year-old.

A few runners are passing by, but none of them are Aaron. Juliet is watching impatiently, and squeals when Dannie lifts her up onto her shoulders.

“Can you see now, munchkin?” You ask, your hand resting gently on her back, even though Dannie is holding onto her ankles.

Juliet nods. “I see him!”

You look down the way, and you see him, too.

Your lips split into a grin almost immediately. His black shorts, black t-shirt, with his number pinned to the front. His hair is slick with sweat, and yet, you still have a burning desire to run your fingers through it.

Aaron moves to the side, running right next to you, giving Juliet a high five on his way by, and you, too, only when his fingers graze yours, he squeezes.

As soon as he crosses the finish line, Juliet is scrambling out of Dannie’s arms, and when she hits the ground, she runs.

You’re running after her, Dannie too, calling her name, because she really shouldn’t run off like that.

But your nerves calm down the second you see Juliet jumping into her dad’s arms.

Slowing to a walk, you shake your head with a smile as Aaron spins her around, squeezing her tightly.

“Hey,” he says when he sees you. “I’m glad you guys could make it.”

“Me too,” you smile. “She wouldn’t let me miss it,” you nod toward Juliet.

“You’re smelly,” Juliet says out of nowhere, pinching her nose.

Dannie laughs loudly at her comment as Aaron sets her down. But despite her comment, she doesn’t move from next to him.

“Is that who I think it is?” Derek Morgan’s voice floats through your ears.

You turn around to face him, putting your hands on your hips. “Depends, who do you think it is?”

Derek grins wide. “Come here, you.”

You hug him tightly, and over his shoulder you see everyone else, all with shocked looks on their faces. JJ, Emily, Penelope, Spencer, and Rossi, too.

After giving out hugs all around, you look back to see Juliet still clinging to Aaron’s leg.

“Who is this?” Morgan asks quietly, kneeling down to Juliet’s level. “Hey there.”

She eyes him skeptically. “Hi.”

“Munchkin, this is Derek. He’s a friend, too.”

Derek waves.

“Do you like Frozen?” Juliet asks.

Derek nods seriously. “I love it.”

“Hmph,” she wraps her arm tighter around Aaron’s leg. The sight makes you want to crumble. She looks up at Aaron, and says, “Dad?” To get his attention.

Everyone stills. Even Derek.

“Yes, honey?” Aaron replies, kneeling down, too.

“Are they your friends, too?”

He nods. “We’re all really good friends.”

She shrugs. “Okay.” She looks around at everyone, and gasps when she sees Penelope. “I like your bracelet!”

Penelope looks down at it with a smile. “You wanna try it on?”

Juliet practically sprints toward Penelope with a dramatic nod.

While the two of them are playing with Pen’s jewelry, everyone else is looking at you and Hotch with blatantly shocked expressions.

“We’ll explain later,” you offer. “But the answer is yes.”

Rossi, bless him, breaks the awkward, silent tension. “Is anyone else starving?”

You laugh some nerves away. “Yeah, I am. We just need to go pack up our stuff.”

“I can help,” Aaron says.

“Okay, yeah,” you nod, glancing over at Juliet, but her, Penelope, JJ, and Emily are now sitting in the grass, talking animatedly about Frozen.

“I’ll stay over here,” Dannie says, nudging your arm.

“Thank you,” you murmur, trying to hide your dumb smile at the thought of being alone with Aaron, even if for only a few seconds.

Regardless, you try to keep your cool when you turn back to him. “We’re just over here.”

“Lead the way,” he gestures ahead.

You ignore all efforts to hide your smile now as you start walking. He falls into step beside you, his sweaty shoulder brushing yours, but you don’t mind.

And against all of your better judgement, you slide your hand into his.

His surprised look is priceless, and you can’t help the snort of laughter that escapes you. “What? Am I not allowed to make the first move?”

You don’t know if the red on his cheeks is from running or blushing. “No, no, you’re allowed.”

“Good,” you murmur, walking a little closer. Your things are far too close for your liking. You want to walk with him like this for longer.

When you stop next to your chairs, you don’t let go of his hand. He doesn’t let go, either.

“Can I ask something?” He says, squeezing your hand.

“Sure.”

He steps closer, his toes nearly touching yours. “If you make the first move, am I allowed to make the second?”

You can’t help the violent swarm of butterflies in your stomach. “I think that’s how that works.” You pause, tilting your head, gesturing to how close your feet are. “Was that your move?”

He shakes his head. “No. This is.”

That’s when, when I saw your face/You let me in, and baby, that’s when

Aaron’s free hand holds your jaw as he kisses you in the same tender, gentle way that he used to, only this one has four years’ worth of apologies in every touch. You let go of his hand to smooth your hands on his chest, his neck, any place you can touch because it’s been too long. Way too long.

That’s when I want you/That’s when I love you/That’s when

[makeste]

BnHA 326: What’s up Kids, It’s Me, Your Old Pal Stain

Previously on BnHA: Ochako shamed the U.A. Clown Mob into letting Deku go back inside his own fucking school by giving them an hour-long speech about how not to be humongous dickheads. Kouta and Gigantic Fox Lady saved the manga by being the only ones brave enough to give Deku a hug. Shouto was all “man, all this togetherness sure does remind me of that promise you made that we would handle Touya together which you immediately bailed on, doesn’t it, Dad.” Aizawa was all, “for the one and a half people out there who thought that my losing an eye and a leg might actually make me less sexy, I’m very happy to prove you wrong.” All Might was all, “[standing outside the U.A. fortress alone in the rain talking to someone or something??].” Like seriously, what was up with that though.

Today on BnHA: All Might is all “here I am in Kamino having a belated mid-life crisis because Deku abandoned me and I’m a terrible mentor and everything sucks and I hate myself.” Stain is all, “don’t make me come over there and give you a ten page speech about why you’re still the goat while menacingly holding you at swordpoint the entire time” because idk if you knew this guys, but Stain is pretty crazy actually. Anyway so he does that, and then All Might gets all emotional, and then the lady from chapter 92 shows up and gives All Might’s statue an encouraging pep talk, and then Horikoshi is all “and it even stopped raining lol can you believe this shit I’m not even a little bit subtle,” and he really isn’t. But I still got emotional anyway, because seeing people reassure All Might that everything he’s struggled for his entire life hasn’t been in vain just got to me okay. Horikoshi knows I am weak to the All Might feels and he just goes for the jugular every time, that bastard.

lmao. “in the neverending downpour, All Might is...” yeah, thank you, glad we’re getting right to that then

“All Might is driving 95 mph in his busted ass car in the pouring rain, is what he’s doing.” huh

so basically a day or two after his adopted child refused to accept the handmade bento that he packed with love, my man is out here acting like he’s got nothing to live for anymore. this sure bodes well for certain prophecies on which the clock is still ominously ticking down

his fucking face though omg. is it weird that I’m kind of hoping more people ambush him just because I think it’d be funny to see them get their asses kicked like the last bunch

(ETA: or maybe he will just stand there openly not giving a fuck and basically daring them to stab him!! get it together please All Might.)

side note, “anti-hero supporters” is such a strange way of saying “people who hate heroes”, which I’m assuming is what they actually wanted to say?? this makes it sound like it’s a group that really loves antiheroes. “these Hannibal stans have been a real menace lately. time to go deal with them”

ha ha ha, fucking ouch

are you really gonna do it Horikoshi you bastard. are you really going to let that be the final encounter between the two characters whose relationship you once described as the vertical axis of the entire fucking story. are you really gonna?? huh??

huh

you’re telling me you were driving 112 mph and you still didn’t get there in time. you’re losing your touch old man. lol Todo’s ice is almost fully melted already, how late were you

(ETA: so apparently this is taking place after the end of chapter 325, meaning he went to U.A., hung out for a bit, saw the kids come back with his bedraggled half-dead protégé in tow, watched as they shamed the civilians into some long-overdue character development, and then was all “welp, time to go argue with the hero-hating faction or something because I’m feeling useless.” and Edge just let him go, just like that. though to be fair I have to imagine it’s pretty hard to say no to All Fucking Might.)

also belated lol at the fact that the kids were all “yeahhhhhhh we are definitely not gonna touch that thing, let’s just leave it here, he doesn’t need it anyway.” probably the right call to make since they couldn’t get a hazmat team on such short notice

fuck. ha ha ha fucking ouch part two

All Might please put that thing down before you get gangrene. also yeah, you dropped the ball, good for you to acknowledge it. nobody’s perfect and you did your best. but yeah you could have handled a lot of things completely differently. but I still love you

is Horikoshi really putting this flashback here. are you serious. what kind of fucking sadist

look, I swear I’m not one of those people that runs up and down the street shouting “DEATH FLAG!!” at every third panel lol. but this shit screamed Death Flag when we originally got it, and it’s screaming DEATH FLAG!!! even more now. like with the capital letters and exclamation marks and all. and that’s just a fact. I don’t like it but that’s how it is

ffkdjslk

“DID YOU READ THE SIGN??!” Horikoshi asks while zooming in maniacally because he thinks we’re blind or something. lol what

-- though actually, it only just occurred to me that this sign is actually written in English. I never really paid attention up until now and had been assuming it was written in Japanese and translated by the scanlators, but the writing here is clearly part of the original image. anyway so maybe that’s why he’s zooming in?? just to make sure everybody pays attention lol

okay fuck this

see, this is the whole problem right here. once again All Might is all on his own. Deku’s self-destructive angst spiral was fortunately brought to a grinding halt because he actually has support from his friends and family and teachers and classmates. but All Might never had that same kind of support, and it’s made all the difference between the two of them, and not in a good way. Katsuki wasn’t wrong when he said All Might and Deku were both cut from the same cloth. but now when it’s All Might’s turn to go all “I WALK A LONELY ROAD~~” once again, there’s nobody in sight

just, after forty plus years of him carrying this torch, I just wish someone would finally come along to let him know he doesn’t have to. all those things that he wanted to say to Deku are also things that he needs and deserves to hear himself. Aizawa was making a little progress there, but now he’s got his sad zombie cloud boyfriend situation to deal with, and we can’t expect him and his perfect hair to solve all our problems. someone else has gotta step up

oh my god

“you rang?” never mind I take it all back sob

omg why am I laughing. shit

this man truly has the best PR game in the series. we were truly convinced he was gonna suddenly become a good guy and defend All Might against the other villains or some nonsense. as if this wasn’t the same man who decided on a whim that Iida Tensei deserved to be paralyzed, and that his fifteen-year-old brother deserved to die for daring to be upset about it

lol even All Might is all “I genuinely never saw this coming” lmao

just want to say, for the record, I have always harbored a very sensible hatred toward Stain. feeling very vindicated right now. good job Past Me

adsfklwkfsdwgkj

ffffwefjslkg. ghsdlkg. dsfkkkslkjldwkjrg

STAIN: heard you talking shit old man

ME: smh that’s what I thought you’d say you dumb fucking Stain

STAIN: how dare you talk about All Might that way

ME: gljfljgk

(ETA: in hindsight I have no idea how I didn’t clue in sooner that he didn’t recognize him -- or, well, ~didn’t recognize~ him, to be more accurate lol. I think it was the whole “is that a slight against the heroes?” thing that threw me. Viz’s translation makes it much clearer that he’s offended on behalf of All Might specifically, not heroes in general. anyways.)

sob. so All Might is all “yeah I don’t blame you for not recognizing me in this sweet leather jacket”

good thing he still knows how to do this party trick

A+ reflexes on Stain’s part presumably pulling the sword back a few inches to keep this dumbass from impaling himself with his whole pufferfish routine. can you imagine if that was the gruesome death Nighteye foresaw. and he was just too embarrassed to say anything

lol anyways guess I was wrong about Stain everyone

way to fucking go, Past Me. you really biffed this one

oh wait

Stain sure is one wacky rollercoaster ride

oh fuck me lol I forgot how much I did not miss this

(ETA: “this here is the sacred ground where All Might gave up the last of his power and turned into a shriveled old man!! please ignore the part where I admit to knowing all about that, and yet pretend not to recognize said man when he’s standing two feet in front of me.”)

Past Me, I know we’ve had our ups and downs these past ninety seconds, but I’m really starting to think you were on to something. this dude has always been kind of insufferable. always acting like his high horse is a fucking giraffe when it’s actually a Shetland pony

dammit now he’s got All Might going off on a depressed monologue

oh my god my heart

shit

why the fuck does that hit so hard. he became a hero because he couldn’t bear to just sit back and let bad things happen to people who didn’t deserve it. I mean that’s basically the same as every hero ever, right? so why does it still hit so fucking hard every single time though. what is it about seeing someone so determined to stand up for other people and fight on their behalf. it just never loses its impact no matter how many times I see that determination mirrored in so many of my favorite characters

“I wanted to make the world a better place.” omg. but you did, though. like seriously, I feel like people are always dogging on him for not being 100% perfect, and fandom really doesn’t give him enough credit for everything he still managed to accomplish. this man came of age at a time when Japan was by all accounts a total shitshow, and singlehandedly managed to bring about an era of peace that lasted for four fucking decades. can you imagine having peace for that long?? that’s longer than I’ve been alive. shit

and he gave people hope. he inspired them and protected them and made them feel safe. and no, he couldn’t save everyone, because he’s only one fucking dude (and also because the whole time AFO was also out there desperately working to undermine him so that he could keep preaching his narrative of “heroes are bad actually”). but you know what he did do, is inspire multiple new generations of heroes who, if they can all manage to work together, will finally be able to accomplish everything he never could

so yeah. forty years of peace, and inspired the “that’s how we all became the greatest heroes” generation -- that’s a fucking win in my book. talk about having a net positive impact on the world. lol anyways now I’m all fired up and ready to fight anyone who tries to talk any shit about you, All Might

“but what if I talk shit about myself” okay listen up All Might I’m gonna need you to try just a little bit harder to work with me here okay. please calm down and stop blaming yourself for every single bad thing that’s ever happened in the world. do you remember that time Bakugou was blaming himself for Kamino, and you gave him a hug and told him it wasn’t his fault, and that he was only a boy, and that even though he was strong, even strong people can struggle with the burdens they place on themselves, and that you were sorry for not seeing that earlier? do you remember all of that? that’s what I want someone to tell you too, dammit. anyway please stop breaking my heart please and thanks

wtf

are you dead All Might

um

I don’t even have the slightest idea what’s happening lol

oh snap did he grab him so they could hide??

hold the fucking phone. don’t tell me this person in the background with the umbrella is here to actually do something decent??

oh my godddd

and here come the feels. oh boy. okay don’t mind me, I’m just gonna sit here sobbing over this fictional lady and her simple act of kindness in this weekly shounen manga that I care about way too much

FUCKING DAMMIT AND HERE’S A SECOND HELPING

DON’T MIND ME, I’M JUST GETTING DISPROPORTIONATELY EMOTIONAL OVER THIS WOMAN’S DETERMINATION TO HONOR A MAN WHO SACRIFICED EVERYTHING TO SAVE HER AND COUNTLESS OTHERS. I’M JUST HAVING SOME FEELS OVER HERE ABOUT HER HEARTFELT, DOESN’T-EVEN-KNOW-ANYONE-ELSE-IS-WATCHING FEELINGS OF GRATITUDE THAT COMPELLED HER TO COME OUT HERE AND MAKE THIS SMALL BUT POWERFUL GESTURE. I’M JUST OUT HERE GETTING ALL PROFOUNDLY WORKED UP ABOUT STATUE MAINTENANCE AND THE HUMAN RACE. NEVER MIND. JUST IGNORE ME AND CARRY ON

holy shit. I was not even remotely prepared. you can’t just do that to me. you can’t just leave all these death flags on my lawn and then suddenly shift gears to show me the best of humanity in a chapter where I was expecting the worst. that fucks a person up lol

OH ARE WE STILL GOING

my heart. you see that, All Might. your legacy is so much more powerful and meaningful than you think

...has. has Stain actually been giving All Might a pep talk this entire time

I give up lol. this dude is a fucking enigma

YAYYY

it may just be a metaphor panel, but I’ll take it lol. I missed them. nice to see the traffic light trio front and off-center. I know the whole “this is the story of how we all became the greatest heroes” thing had left some questioning whether certain characters would continue to play a central role in the narrative, and hopefully this will help to ease those concerns just a bit

anyway, so idk if it’s getting a bit chilly down there in hell, but damned if Stain didn’t just give an actual decent fucking speech

I have to say, earlier when I was whining about All Might not having a support squad, I really was not expecting Stain to be the one to come over and pat his head and reassure him that he made the world a better place

-- okay LISTEN

YOU CAN’T JUST COME INTO MY HOUSE AND HIT ME WITH THOSE ALL MIGHT TEARS AGAIN GODDAMMIT THIS ISN’T FAIR. my god. first 317 and now this

holy fucking shit

“I’m just gonna pretend like I haven’t been stalking him for two days and didn’t see the entire Deku bentogate thing go down, and then I’ll give him the whole big speech that I rehearsed, and then I’ll turn around and be all ‘BUT IF YOU’RE A TRUE HERO’, and then I’ll toss him the super-secret AFO wifi password that I stole from Tartarus. god I’m such a badass. fucking give myself chills”

so basically what you’re telling me is that this whole time my “what’s up kids” characterization of Stain from this shitpost has actually been 100% accurate. just want to make sure I’m understanding this right. okay then

“and then I’ll dramatically spin around and be all NOW COME KILL ME BITCH”

it must be so much fun to write Stain. drawing this coked-out maniac who talks like a chatbot that was trained to speak by reading Alan Moore monologues. that must be a trip

anyway so All Might is still crying, the awesome lady from chapter 92 is admiring her handiwork totally oblivious to the batshit insanity going on fifty meters to her right, and it’s finally stopped raining lol

“THE RAIN WAS A METAPHOR YOU SEE” yes, yes, we got it lol. thanks for that Horikoshi. don’t think we needed any help putting the pieces together on that one but I appreciate the effort

so that’s the end! and as I mentioned in another post, I had the count off by one chapter, but next week should be cliffhanger week! so break out your U.A. Traitor bingo cards, friends and fiends. either that or something else happens that I’m completely not expecting at all. which, based on my success rate with Stain predictions, I’d say is more than likely lol

mmm but anyway, so now that the Hug Deku 2021 campaign has finally come to an end, what’s it gonna take to get a hug for my struggling bento-preparing jacket-rocking world-weary death-flag-waving husband who is the worthiest man to ever live and deserves the fucking world, goddammit

[studiojeon]

troubled outsiders | intro - jjk

| summary | -  how you two end up pining for each other.

warnings: none :) 

content: idol!jungkook x student!oc, friends to lovers (because it’s THE superior trope okurrrt), jungkook is quiet and shy but a social butterfly when needed (and when it comes to oc but you’re not supposed to know that yet), oc is both a badass and a socially akward queen, she has TWO friends and only because one is dating the other (like... same), the Lee Charyeong is her bestie, oc works at bighit and feels like everyone either fears her or hates her, author nim is a crackhead and has no plot planned for this series whatsoever (doesn’t know if she’ll keep this up, we’ll see).

words: 1.93 k

His presence was overwhelming, to say the least. Even if he were surrounded by six hundred other equally handsome men, somehow, to you (and the majority of the female population, at that point) he was as captivating and magnetic as they come. Jeon Jungkook didn't pay no mind to no one, but sure as hell everyone became hyper aware of his existence and essence in time. And that didn’t exclude you.

Yet, as nonchalant and indifferent as the man could be perceived, in reality he was more considerate and friendly than the aura he exuded. You knew this because working in the same company had to teach a thing or two about the people who literally carried said company and the whole industry at some point, still you barely knew four or three people, including your assistant and Jungkook, whom you had met once.

The opportunity of working at the company had come to you out of the blue, quite literally, you were attempting to send one of your assignments in when an email appeared in your notifications during your sailor moon study break. 

HYBE Entertainment

We’re glad to inform you that you’re being recruited for the position of Logistics Manager in one of our sub companies, BIGHIT Entertainment. We’ve thoroughly looked through the CV you’ve submitted and are very interested in your capabilities and what you can contribute to our organization. One of our other managers will gladly meet you on a day you can both agree on. Make sure to answer this email to get more details about your interview.

“Nani!? THE FUCK?” sure as hell that your eyes and cognitive functions were deceiving you (ADHD) you went over the text a little over three times in a row before the message settled in your mind. This was sus. 

Before even considering a reply you made a quick call. “Fucking Lee Chaeryeong” you spat on your end of the line. “You did this, didn’t you?”.

Her silence was more than enough to have you cursing her under your breath. “I don’t know what exactly you’re talking about but it most likely was me. Does it have to do with a sex toy in particular?”

“No” you denied almost monotonously, guessing the pile of boxes in the corner of your room with her names on them was what she referred to. “Does anything come to mind if i mention BIGHIT FUCKING ENTERTAINMENT?”

It was her. All those conversations during the summer about how badly you wanted to work in the entertainment business as marketing staff of some sort had their effect on your friend, who, despite all your excuses and denials, knew you better than you and your mom combined did, and because of this, was sure as hell you were not making a move towards that goal whatsoever. So, being the boss bitch she was, she took matters into her own hands, was what she explained.

You concluded that was the reason you had reached a point in your life where you had more experience than most recently graduated kids in your field, because Chaeryeong had you moving every summer break. You had been the manager of a coffee franchise and convenience store during you junior and senior years, and also figured a way to improve the marketing management strategy of a fucking restaurant while at it. Not to toot your own horn, but you were kind of cool.

Or not. “I hope this job satisfies your workaholic ass for once, I’m running out of ideas”. Chaeryeong spat before hanging up.

Sure as hell it would. 

On friday afternoon, you made your way to the HYBE INSIGHT building and introduced yourself to your recruiters who promised to give you a call at some point. “It went fine” you told Chaeryeong once you were in your car. And it was the truth, however you weren’t so sure if they would actually hire you at some point since well, you were a girl in a male dominated industry and, in your opinion, there were always better people than you. “Wanna go grab coffee?”

“I want to. But, I have practice today. I’m actually on my way there. Please avoid driving through Hongdae today, this shit’s packed.” You sighed and thanked her for the heads up. You missed your friend, badly. You hadn’t seen each other in three weeks, and you didn’t even live so far away from each other (you did, but it had been worse before). You two had very agitated lives to say the least. Chaeryeong was a kpop group member, and well, you were jumping from job to job and getting your phD in Business Management at the same time. It was hard to find moments to spare together during some periods of the year, but you guess the anticipation made your encounters better.

“Talk about anticipation” you slammed your forehead against your desk, taking a breather after such an anxiety packed situation. Short story: you got the job (for some fucking reason). And you had gone through a whole week of expectancy and anguish. Not getting that job would have broken your heart, and ego at the same time. 

You guessed the law of attraction tactics Chaeryeong had taught you had sorted their effect and were what led you to your current position in life.

“Miss _____, your presentation’s ready” your work assistant gave you a comforting pat in the back as she took a seat somewhere next to you. You were nervous, shitless. It was your fifth week at the job, and being the proactive woman you were, you had collected lots of data in order to come up with a resources management plan.

It was a Thursday afternoon, and more than a hundred people sat in front of you, waiting for your speech. Including him, who you’d once bumped into accidentally during one of your data recollections runs inside the building. 

You hated having the need to impress others yet, hence your anxious behaviour. But this was a decisive moment in regards to your validation in your new job and how you’d continue to be perceived during your work stance (no reason to panic at all)… you needed to get it together.

“I think I just pissed off a bunch of old men right now,” you told your assistant right after you got off stage. “I need a bathroom break”. Linh gave you a reassuring smile, one she always had plastered on her face.

“Take as long as you need to. I’ll give you a call once the rest are done”.

The commute to the bathroom was unnecessarily complicated in your opinion. You had spent a little over a month rushing through the hallways of the building and you swore every single day your spatial orientation got a bit more fucked up. There was no way there wasn’t a single bathroom on the floor you were in, that would just be atrocious. “It’s not completed yet” someone said beside you as you stared at the half empty map the company had projected on a wall next to the elevators. “Where do you need to go?” 

Kim Taehyung of all people in the world was talking to your ugly and unworthy ass. Your breath caught in your throat and after staring for at least five seconds your body finally reacted to your orders. “Oh, um… the bathroom. I’ve been looking for it for a good ten minutes” you explained with a nervous laugh.

“Trust me, I get it. I still get lost over here” he smiled gently. “It’s in the hallway in the middle of the next hallway” 

You laughed at his very ambiguous explanation. “Thank you” you bowed your head and made your way to said destination.

It was in the hallway to your left, not your right, and it took you a while to figure out that new piece of information. Once you were staring at yourself in the mirror, you realized that you looked considerably tired and exhausted from all the social interaction you had undergone throughout the day. You were used to the side stares and whispering you’d get whenever you entered a room at that point, but some days you just wished you could get a break from them. After all, it wasn’t your fault you didn’t look Korean at all, and that you also didn’t fit the stereotype of a foreigner.

You got that from your mom, both the non Korean features and social fatigue. But that wasn’t even the problem most of the time, it was your friendly and smart nature which she had also passed onto you. Some would consider it a blessing, but to you it was a burden, like a clear glass that shielded you from introducing yourself into other people’s realities. You had few friends and people to trust, but in your everyday life you had to deal with the pressure of standing out too much and that came with a lot of negative energy from others. You sigh as you spray your favorite fragrance on yourself. You could be feeling like shit, but no one will ever catch you slipping.

But that excluded him apparently. You hadn’t noticed that on the other side of the hallway was the men’s bathroom and the realization hit you as you were calmly getting some tea from the vending machine. “Good afternoon” the man greeted you as he made his way out the hallway, but stopped in his tracks right after he noticed you. “_____! Hi” he smiled at you and you wanted to die, suddenly forgetting what you were ordering in the first place.

“H-hi Jungkook” You smiled back, poorly attempting to put your wallet back into your backpack. 

“Need help there?” he noticed your agitated state and held your bag for you. He smelled just as heavenly as you had expected, somewhat between big dick energy and flowers. Oh, and he also remained as kind and polite as you remembered him.

Seeming as if he wasn’t planning on continuing his path to wherever he was heading to in the first place, he stood quietly by your side, waiting for you to be done with your deal. “How have you been?” you break the ice for him.

Quickly, you grab your tea and start walking back to the auditorium together, unaware of your surroundings or the suspicions that could arise. “Busy, but very good. How have you been? I saw your presentation earlier… I wish I understood half of what you said but you still sounded amazing”.

And you would never admit it out loud, but you were positive you were blushing (and falling in love too - platonically, of course). “Oh god, you think so? I basically told them they’ve been doing things wrong all along so maybe you’re the only one who’s appreciative of my work” you handed him the second can of iced tea you bought without him noticing. You swear his eyes lit up like stars in the night sky. “Payback for the other day” you smile at him.

The first time you two had crossed paths you didn’t look nearly as glamorous as you did now. In fact, you looked incredibly disturbed and in pain, carrying a huge pile of paperwork in your hands. But as soon as sweet Jungkook noticed your state, he offered you a hand and somehow ended up helping through your multiple data collecting trips that afternoon. It was a nice day.

“Anytime” he took the can in his hands with a shy look on his face. “Unless I’m practicing, you know…” you look down at his feet, with huge black boots engulfing them, and you smile due to their contrast with his personality. “Here, i’ll give you my number so you can call me whenever you need to put all those papers back. Hopefully I’ll be around” he added as he pulled his phone from his back pocket.

Way to get a girl’s number, my god.

[in-tua-deep]

Are you into my hero academia? What about an AU or crossover with tua?

UHHHH I am technically, like, peripherally? I watched some seasons of the show like two or three years ago and since then have simply absorbed all content through osmosis, reading fanfiction that has canon events, and my sister telling me about the arcs of her fav characters lmao

so a crossover hmmm

First of all you'd have to like, establish whether bnha is an alternate universe or just The Future If No Apocalypse with quirks being traced back to the descendants of the kids born without mothers

So let's say it's that - the glowing baby was the "first quirk" but the truth is people had powers before that. But - well, the Umbrella Academy was obviously a marketing gimmick to those in the future! There were even comics based on them

In the future, you might find some of those comics in museum exhibits dedicated to depictions of powers in the pre-quirk era, but they're just fun depictions and much less popular than, oh, DC or MCU comics which are also in the exhibits!

End of s2 doesn't happen I guess in this au?? No sparrow academy at least lmao. So, the Umbrella Academy stop the apocalypse (again) and the Commission threat is? Neutralized? Whatever. They decide to jump back to the future

Five warns them that time travel is a crapshoot, that he has no fucking idea when they'll land beyond some nebulous "future" because Five can at least control the direction if not exactly how long

Also, Five is like. Super tired. Incredibly tired. Homeboy still has a healing gut wound, time traveled twice, has been jumping all over the place, gotten even more injured, experienced paradox psychosis, and managed to undo time all in the space of like, two weeks. There actually more than that but we don't have time to get into how fucking tired Five is from his ~Month of Hell

Like genuinely this is like putting someone almost delirious from lack of sleep in the driver's seat of a car and expecting to get to your destination in one piece

But hey, the siblings are like "do it uwu" and Five has sacrificed everything for them already so why not get behind the wheel again

So Five jumps them, and of course something goes wrong because Five has pushed his powers like a great big rubber band and honestly it was only a matter of time before he lost his grip and it snapped back to hit him

So here be the umbrella academy: spilled out into the future like a cup of bad coffee.

Five probably isn't in too good of shape tbh, like they're hundreds of years in the future (but hey at least confirmation of no apocalypse am I right) in a world full of superpowers and Five is like. bleeding from his ears and nose probably idk

Let's handwave a little bit - Reginald made them all polyglots so the squad all speak varying levels of Japanese. Allison is the best at it, Five is second best but tends to use more archaic words bc he had missions in Japan back when he was with the commission, and Klaus is third best.

(Ben is the worst bc he decided when he was 16-and-dead that he didn't have to do anything regarding lessons and maintenance and hasn't given a shit since - but also he's dead so)

So you have a bunch of weird adults with a bleeding child in like, an alley who have appeared from nowhere

so of course heroes get involved

Anyway, the squad get taken in and Five is conscious but like, barely? And he's not going to let himself get separated from his siblings again fuck-you-officer and there is a lot of confusion

anyway detective tsukauchi ends up getting involved and ends up having to hear this batshit story and be like "...truth." which sends all kinds of people scrambling because fucking time travel? Like yeah, it's been theorized to be a possible quirk but there's no recorded cases of any sort of time travel that is for more than 24 hours let alone hundreds of years

"I'm an adult." Five says sourly, "I just happened to be returned to my 13 year old body when I time traveled one time."

"True." Tsukauchi says, feeling his soul leave his body, but like. absently. the way he does when he's called in at 2am after getting off of work at midnight.

"I'm 58." Five says.

"Lie." Tsukauchi says, because this is a headcanon hill I will die on.

"I'm probably 58, but it was hard to keep track. I'm at least 50." Five corrects.

"True." Tsukauchi sighs like these six (seven? they keep referring to another sibling and Klaus said 'ghost' like that was fine and it registered as true and Tsukauchi is not nearly paid enough for this) are not giving him a migraine by just existing

on the bright side there's like, probably protocols in place for individuals who are Legally Chronologically Adults but thanks to quirks are Not Physically Or Not Mentally Adults with tests to determine if the individual needs a guardian or not

though i'm gonna be honest idk if Five would pass the test bc he literally cannot take care of himself at all, has never paid taxes or understands how to exist legally, and also his emotional maturity is stunted as all hell. also like. we don't actually know how much being in his thirteen-year-old body affects his mental state but yeAH Five is vibing

anyway Tsukauchi probably phones a friend on this bullshit because Time Travel Child alone is probably enough for the Hero Commission to be like "find a way to control and use it or nuke it from orbit" and that's not even touching whatever the fuck Klaus is doing (shit gets real once 'dead men tell no tales' stops being true) let ALONE Allison's whole deal

on the bright side like, at least Vanya isn't getting side-eyed that much bc Big Destructive Quirks aren't exactly unknown? if vanya wanted to i guess quirk suppressors exist for that until extensive training on how to control a super powerful quirk happens

Tsukauchi in the group chat: Aizawa please I am literally begging you to take this bullshit on

Aizawa: in this economy? with my class?

RatGod: lol we'll take them ;3c

Aizawa: no

Anyway they probably end up having to live at UA while Five insists on trying to get them home still and everyone else is like "oh hey we used to be child soldiers as well! (:" and Aizawa is like "i hate everything about this and everything about all of you but also like nedzu is making me interact with you so :/"

nedzu is out here vibing like "lol i just don't want the hero commission to get their little paws on these time traveling fuckers, i think you should make then teaching assistants or something"

honestly the siblings are probably like. figuring out how to function in the bnha universe and getting like, legally registered and stuff while Five ferally refuses bc that's like saying he's giving up on getting them home and he can do this

Recovery girl tries to heal him a little when he arrives and he passes out for two weeks like, immediately bc homeboy is running on fumes and spite at this point

also i think on principle it would be REALLY FUNNY if the squad got to tag along with the class bc like. Five is thirteen and the class are all 15. this does not sound like a large age gap. anyone who has interacted with teenagers know that the class would squint at Five and be like "who is this sassy lost middle schooler."

I feel like when I was a sophomore we were still like "freshman... babie" even though we were literally only one year older.

i think the difference between the umbrella academy and school kids would be pretty funny like. objectively the bnha kids are lowkey child soldiers?? like they're 15 and fighting villains but like, there's all this red tape and laws and stuff but,,, deku still be breaking his limbs in a child fighting ring against equally superpowered children for like. entertainment and sponsorships sooo

but also like Five would be like "oh cool when is the experimentation class"

"the what"

"you know, when your powers are pushed real hard by putting you in different terrible situations while your dad and sibling stand by with clipboards writing down the exact voltage it takes before you can't use your powers anymore when being electrocuted"

"hound dog's office is right there. therapy is available to you at any time. i need you to know this."

all might calls Luther "my boy" like one (1) time and Luther just breaks down crying probably because he is starved for positive attention

klaus and midnight get along like a literal house on fire, aizawa tried his best to keep them apart for as long as possible but god damn

(klaus: your name is shimura nana??

all might: immediately dies choking on blood)

i feel it absolutely necessary to point out that aizawa, present mic, and midnight are all like, 30? and the umbrella academy are all between 29-early 30s? they are PEERS but like. the umbrella academy are more chaotic due to childhood trauma

the umbrella academy probably get offered to like. also train to be heroes. i mean,, there HAS to be some sort of track for people who change careers right?? you don't have to cement your future as a hero when you're 15 i'm sure there must be something and the squad already have experience if they want to go be legal heroes

diego probably does at least?? diego just vibes honestly. diego gets momo to make knives during a team exercise and they just go feral on everyone else and it ends with diego highfiving momo and someone getting way to close to being stabbed for comfort

Five might just be. legally enrolled as an Actual Student? But also i think it's funny to picture the entire squad just. all in the back of the classroom with luther trying to fit into a high school desk as they take notes on the laws of The Future surrounding heroics

every word out of the umbrella academy's mouths just make everyone more concerned on principal but like, five and klaus are probably the worst offenders. Klaus just says whatever comes to mind with no filter and Five doesn't get what people would consider to be abnormal anymore like

Five: yeah our dad bought us when we were babies and experimented on us throughout our childhood in order to make an elite team of child soldiers superheroes, it happens

Todoroki: ...have you heard of quirk marriages?

izuku probably has an aneurism bc he's is the only person who might recognize them from the comics because you know ya boy extensively researched the idea of heroics in pre-quirk eras (batman was an inspiration alright???) and might dredge up a memory of a less popular comic series

Five: I can time travel but it is very hard, which is why we are hundreds of years in the future. And why I look like a child.

Kaminari: so are you a kid or not?

Five, serenely: whatever is most convenient for me at any given moment

Mina: hell yeah game the system

they have a brief lesson on astronomy and Luther raises his hand like "ooh! i was isolated on the moon for four years and did SO MUCH research" and then just gets up and starts infodumping like way too much information on the moon

Izuku sitting there like "damn if quirks hadn't popped up we could have achieved so much in terms of space travel. please tell me more giant man who lived in pre-quirk era."

Vanya finds out about the quirkless and is like "oh mood that genuinely sounds like my childhood, being ordinary in a house full of extraordinary people, and then i found out that i did have powers but only much later in life after i had already been emotionally scarred by the experience"

deku: vanya we have so much in common

iida and uraraka: concerned noises

aizawa: hound dog. therapy with hound dog for all of you.

there's probably some conflict with like, the hero commission wanting to get their hands on the time travelers?? but probably especially five and klaus as a) time travel and b) ghosts (the hc def has bodies they would like to stay buried)

five has a pavlovian reaction to anything with 'commission' in the name and hates them on site, probably plays into his age in order to become a ward of UA or something to protect him from the commission a little bit.

(this makes nedzu Five's legal guardian. aizawa has his resignation papers all prepped in a drawer marked 'in case of emergency' but let's be real, if nedzu wants to take over the world aizawa should probably be on the rat-bear's side of things :/)

five: ah, i do recall the inhumane experimentation that we were subjected to

nedzu, who was experimented on: haha same hat! want me to dig up the location of reginald hargreeves's remains so you can spit on them?

klaus: nah no worries we dumped them out in the courtyard unceremoniously like, a while back. how long ago varies for each of us because of time travel!

luther: you said hound dog's office was down the hall and to the right?

on the bright side, Luther probably feels like. way less self conscious about his body, partially bc of his fighting and all that in the 60s but also bc !! now he genuinely doesn't feel like a freak. no one even gives him a second glance. one of the teachers looks like a slab of cement with a face. gang orca looks Like That. there is literally a student with an entire bird head and goth aesthetic. Luther does not stick out at all

allison and shinso bond over having "villainous" voice-based quirks

allison and shinso having worn muzzles at some point in their youth as punishment 🤝

aizawa probably helps train vanya as well with the whole, being able to erase a world ending quirk safely thing he's got going on which makes for a very nice safety net

i don't think vanya would want to be a hero at the end of things though. maybe the assistant teacher in the music class or something?? all vanya wants is to be able to not end the world

i feel like as time goes by, five brings up trying to get home less and less. part of that is because like,,, genuinely what do they have to go back to?? Allison has Claire, but like. I'm 100% sure the first thing she did in the future was try track down Claire's records and found out Claire was like. fine. became an adult, had a family, probably became the ancestor of the first "quirked" kids who officially popped up after light baby. had a good life, died at an old age etc. etc.

they start settling into the bnha world with like, "we can always hop aboard the five express into where the fuck ever" as a plan Z if things go completely pear shaped (again)

i'mma be real, five himself doesn't give a fuck as long as there is a) no apocalypse and b) his family is alive. Like that's it. His bar is so incredibly low and yet his life keeps fucking trying to limbo under it

i just think it would be funny to have like, Five trying to get along with his "peers" and make friends while the siblings do the same but like, in the staff room

also think it would be funny for five to just walk into the staff room and get coffee occasionally.

a teacher: why is a student in here -

Five, sipping coffee: i'm an adult

nedzu like "what kind of guardian would i be if i didn't teach my new son all the tunnels around ua so he can pop out wherever"

five like "hey new dad can i put stashes of supplies all around ua of weapons, money, food, and other assorted things that might be useful if one needed to fight or make a run for it" and nedzu is like "haha just put your list of what supplies you want in your go bags on my desk and i'll critique it later!"

anyway a bnha/tua crossover would be incredibly chaotic but probably very funny

[maddogofshimano]

A Man’s Promise: Daigo Scratcher Event

Daigo time! Look at these fancy new cards (and karaoke Akiyama, who is the scratcher prize for some reason)

This one ended up being much longer and funnier than I expected, and we get to see Daigo being kind of cool!

Summary: Daigo goes to investigate rumors of Omi Alliance remnants in the outskirts of Kamurocho. He bumps into an old friend turned enemy and gets tangled up in the unintended difficulties the Tojo-Omi war has caused for a local elementary school.

<a certain day in 2006>

With the conflict between the Tojo and the Omi coming to an end, on the outskirts of Kamurocho, the root of the conflict between east and west is still smoldering.

Daigo: The remnants of the Omi Alliance are still around Kamurocho? Is that true?

Yayoi: Yes, that's the current situation as far as we've been able to tell. Even though things are finished, one group has rallied and refuses to accept the outcome. Daigo: Tch, those asshole...! Kashiwagi: Just to be safe, I've informed the clan members to be ready to move out war at any time--at least until this dispute is settled. I'd like to avoid further burdening our members with this.

Daigo: ....Then let's see how those assholes like dealing with me. Yayoi: Daigo, what are you planning on doing? Daigo: I'm going to smoke out those Omi remnants and drive them back to kansai. Kashiwagi: We need to avoid getting into a second conflict with the Omi. Daigo: Yeah... I got that. <Daigo heads out> Daigo: (Well, talking about hunting down the Omi remnants is all well and good, and they're supposed to be in Kamurocho's outskirts) Daigo: (But how the hell am I supposed to find the bastards...)

???: Aniki. Daigo: You're... Shitamura? (Tl note: could also be Shimomura or Shikukira or probably a bunch of other readings but that's what I'm going with. No clue if he’s been in anything else, I don’t recognize the name!)

Shitamura: You really remember me? Shitamura: When I heard my aniki had gone and become the head of the whole Tojo Clan, I figured you'd have forgotten all about me. Daigo: When you conspired with the other side, I was crushed. I haven't forgotten you at all. Shitamura: Haha, you remember stuff from that long ago? Shitamura: By the way aniki, do you think ya could put in a good word for me to join the Tojo Clan? Shitamura: I'm sure you can see that I'd be useful to you. Daigo: You better think carefully before making jokes like that. Daigo: Do you think I'd deal with a double-crossing man like that? Shitamura: Oh, is that so. Well if the Tojo Clan doesn't take me, won't that mean I have no choice but to work with the Omi? Shitamura: You understand the situation, right? Shitamura: There's still a considerable number of Omi remnants hangin' around Kamurocho. Shitamura: I'm holdin' my breath until the Tojo Clan gets tripped up by it. Daigo: What do you know about the Omi remnants? Shitamura: Who can say? Daigo: So that's how it is. If you want to join the Omi, that's fine. Shitamura: What? Daigo: Go join whatever organization you please. I don't have any right to stop you. Daigo: However, if you join the Tojo and betray them in favor of the Omi... Daigo: I'm destroy you with every ounce of my strength. Shitamura: Oooh, scary. Seems that you're the one tellin' jokes now. Daigo: It's fine if you think it's a joke... but it's not. Shitamura: Wait, where are ya going? We're not done talkin', right?

Daigo: I have to investigate the Omi remnants. I don't have time to deal with you. <Daigo leaves> Shitamura: Shit. I gotta get back on the right track! (Tl note: struggling here. 調子に乗りおってからに!) Daigo: (I've been talking to people for a long time, but no one seems to know anything about the Omi remnants.) Daigo: (Is it already that late? I'll have to make another try tomorrow, then. Hm? That's....) Daigo: Hey, what are you doing out this late? (Tl note: I very briefly thought this was the same kid as in Haruka's scratcher lmao)

Takashi: ...Who are you, old man? Daigo: You can call me Daigo. And you are? Takashi: ....Takashi. Daigo: I see.... Hey, Takashi, you should hurry up and go home, won't your parents get worried? Takashi: Leave me alone. Daigo: Well that's not going to happen. It isn't good for a kid like you to be out this late--especially when loitering by yourself, this street is hard to call safe. Daigo: So go home, I'm sure you have homework to do. Takashi: ...But, I don't want to go to school anymore. Daigo: Do you get bullied at school? Takashi: That's not it. Daigo: Well then, will you tell me why you don't want to go to school? Takashi: The event I planned just got cancelled. Daigo: Event? Takashi: It's a scratch card event, you could even win a prize. Takashi: I went and handed out scratch cards to all the old folks on this street. Takashi: If someone won, they'd get one of the rings or necklaces we all made as a prize. Daigo: So why did it get cancelled? Takashi: Because a bunch of scary old men are having a big fight in Kamurocho. Daigo: ....................... Takashi: If we held the event, we'd all get dragged into their fighting... Takashi: So, we had to cancel it. Daigo: So that's what happened. Takashi: All that planning we did? It ended up being for nothing... Takashi: We spent all of our free time after school doing our best making those scratchers... Daigo: ...But, the fighting is already over. If you held it now, there shouldn't be an issue, right? Takashi: We can't. Those scary old guys are still loitering around our school. Daigo: What? Takashi: They lost the fight but they said that even then they won't run away. Daigo: ....Takashi, which school do you go to? Takashi: Ochiyama Elementary. (Tl note: Literally "falling mountain" which is a really funny name for an elementary school) Daigo: (Ochiyama... that is a little bit outside of Kamurocho) Daigo: (Kashiwagi-san did say they were on the outskirts of Kamurocho, so are the Omi remnants hiding out at Ochiyama.....?) Takashi: Since the event I planned was cancelled... After all of our hard work........ Takashi: Everyone tells me that these things can't be helped.... but that just makes me feel worse.... Takashi: So that's why I want to stop going to school...... Daigo: (This kid.... I can't help but feel responsible for this.....) Daigo: ....Go on home for tonight. I'm sure your parents are worried. Takashi: But! Daigo: It'll be okay if you go home. Takashi: If you keep saying that I'll just go somewhere else. There's a lot of other places I can hang out.... Daigo: That's, uhh... Takashi: See ya. Thanks for worrying about me. But, I'm not going to go home. Daigo: ....If I go talk to your school and get them to run the event, will that make you go home? Takashi: Eh! Really? You'll talk to the old guys there so the event can happen!? Daigo: Yes, I promise. Takashi: Sure, I'll go home then! But don't you forget your promise, okay? Daigo: A real man isn't a backstabber. <the following day> Teacher: Principal, there's a guest here to see you. (Tl note: oh my god Daigo. imagine being this poor principal and the chairman of the local yakuza shows up like "hey you gotta run this scratcher event the kids worked really hard on it :(" I would die)

Daigo: Pardon the intrusion, Principal. 

Principal: So, which student are you here about? Daigo: I'm... a member of the Tojo Clan's Dojima Family.  Principal: T-Tojo clan...!? Daigo: I've come here today to make a request. Daigo: The event that the children thought of, can I get your approval on it being run? Principal: The... event? Daigo: The scratcher event. We've heard that it was cancelled. Principal: It's true that the event was cancelled.... But why are you interested? Principal: I think people like you have meddled with the children's event more than enough. Daigo: There's no deep meaning behind it. Really, we just can't forgive ourselves if we disadvantage children like this. Principal: Oh... So you're sticking to your own principles. Principal: You should know that the event was cancelled because of a yakuza attack in the vicinity. Principal: Do you think that by doing this you will end up causing us more trouble? Daigo: (There shouldn't be anybody on the turf around here. So that means it is the Omi remnants...) Daigo: .....I promise the children will be safe. So please, allow the event to happen. Principal: I can't trust in the promise of a yakuza. Principal: I can't stand to see a school become so noisy anyways. I was only doing the event for the board of education. Principal: Now, even if I run such an event, my evaluation won't get any better... Daigo: Oi, Principal... Daigo: Didn't you hear me? Principal: Huh? What? Daigo: I'm telling you that if there's any problem at all I'm here to clean it up. So there's no problem from you, right? Principal: O-Oh, right, that's what you said, sir. H-Ha ha... Daigo: Of course, Principal. I'm glad we're understanding each other.

Daigo: Well, I'm off. I look forward to working with you after this. <Daigo leaves> Principal: Hoo... What the hell, why me..... Why do I have to suffer through meeting someone like that...!

<A few days later>

Takashi: Mister!

Daigo: Ah, Takashi. Takashi: We're going to have our event! You really did keep your promise! Daigo: It's like I said. A real man never double crosses. Takashi: You're right. Thank you! Well, I gotta go prepare! <Takashi leaves> Daigo: Heh... I can hardly believe he was so depressed before. <Daigo's phone rings> Daigo: Hm? My phone is... This is Daigo. Principal: I-It's me. The principal at Uchiyama Elementary. Daigo: Ah, you. Have you decided to open the event? Daigo: I'll owe you one for this. As thanks. Principal: A-About that, just now a bunch of mean looking men just entered the school. Principal: They came in here to ask about you, and what we talked about. Daigo: What? What do you mean? Principal: I told them why you were here, and they stole all of the scratchers for the event tomorrow... (Tl note: rggo actually fucked up on this and marked this as Daigo dialogue when it clearly isn't lol) Daigo: All the scratchers were stolen? What the hell, who does something like that... Principal: The man, he was named Shitamura. Daigo: Shitamura huh.... And he took all of the scratchers? Principal: That's correct..... every single scratch card the children made, they're all gone, so the event won't be able to happen... Daigo: Shitamura, that bastard... What is he playing at...... Principal: That person did ask me to pass along a message.... Daigo: A message? Principal: He said he'll be waiting at Kamurocho's Batting Center... Daigo: Got it. I'll head there right away. <Daigo goes> Shitamura: Yo, aniki. Ya kept me waitin'.

Daigo: Shitamura, why the hell did you steal all the scratchers those kids mad? Shitamura: Why, to lure you here... I knew you'd have no choice. Daigo: What? Shitamura: There's a lotta people that have a grudge against ya. Omi Member: Hehe. It's about time we repaid the favor. Daigo-san.

Daigo: Seriously, you're... Shitamura: Yep. A buncha Omi men. Me, I actually decided that the Omi was the better deal. Daigo: Shitamura, you fucker... Shitamura: C'mon, I saw ya goin' into that Ochiyama Elementary school. Shitamura: And I got to wonderin' what that was about, and boy was I surprised when I got the story from the principal. Shitamura: My aniki, who's got a glare that could scare a cryin' kid into silence, is off doin' all this cause of a brat. Shitamura: Everyone's been sayin' ya lost your edge when ya went back to the Tojo Clan. Daigo: It doesn't matter what you think of me. Just hand over the scratch cards already. Daigo: Those kids worked real hard making them. Shitamura: Do you think bein' told soft shit like that will make me hand 'em over? Daigo: What are you hoping for, asshole? Shitamura: You're so cold to me. You really gotta let go of that grudge. Shitamura: For now the good people of the Omi want to get some payback. Shitamura: Of course, not even you can handle this number of people. Daigo: ....Well, we'll see. Shitamura: I'll let you in on something, as a final gift to take to your grave. Shitamura: That rumor about the Omi remnants hiding out around Kamurocho, I was the one who planted that. Daigo: What? Shitamura: That's why ya didn't find any Omi sniffin' around Ochiyama. Daigo: Then why is the Omi wandering around Ochiyama Elementary? Shitamura: That's just to extort cash from the principal. Shitamura: That principal is neck deep in gamblin' debt with the Omi. Daigo: So, the only one lurking around the school was you? Shitamura: Exactly. The remnants of the Omi was just a hoax to catch you off guard--and it seems like you, soon-to-be chairman, have fallen for the bait. Shitamura: Once I kill ya, my cred with the Omi will go through the roof. Daigo: So when you approached me about joining the Tojo, that was a ruse too? Shitamura: Yep, if I could get closer to you, I could get more info on the Tojo. Shitamura: The Omi pays top dollar for that kinda stuff. Daigo: Seems your backstabbing is alive and well. Honestly, I'm relieved to hear that. Shitamura: Why's that? Daigo: Since it was only a rumor that remnants were hiding, the Tojo can stand down from it's war preparations. Daigo: One more thing, none of you fuckers understand a damn thing about why I went into that elementary school. Daigo: So don't trust in your own power so much. Shitamura: ....Is that so. Shitamura: Though if the next chairmen died here, that would be a big problem for the Tojo, right? Daigo: Me, die? I already told you to think before you say stupid shit. Shitamura: Oh, well ain't you full of yourself? Shitamura: The Omi has a big grudge over the war. Think they're gonna be happy with a settlement? Daigo: I understand... It's on me to remind them about why the Tojo Clan is feared. Shitamura: Excellent, let's fuck this bastard up!

<EVENT START>

Shitamura: H-How the hell'dya win against that many people!

Daigo: It doesn't matter how many weaklings you gather. It's pretty sloppy of you if you're only noticing that now.

Shitamura: Shit! Daigo: With that out of the way, hand over the scratchers. Shitamura: What the hell.... Why's a guy like you want to help some elementary school event...... Daigo: I made a promise to a kid. I'm going to make sure that event happens. Shitamura: Th-That's it....? Daigo: I told that kid I was making a promise to him as a man. That's plenty of reason. Shitamura: Ha, hahaha.....! Daigo: What's so funny? Shitamura: ......I was small-minded in hinderin' ya, I think. There couldn't be more difference in the kind of man you 'n' I are. Shitamura: I wanna stop bein' a yakuza. Daigo: That's a good idea. Shitamura: The scratchers are stashed in this locker. ...Well, I'm off for good. Enjoy yourself, aniki. Daigo: Sure... <cut away> Kashiwagi: Pardon the intrusion.

Principal: A-And you are? Kashiwagi: Greetings, I'm Kashiwagi, member of the Tojo Clan. Principal: A-Another from the Tojo Clan... What do you want this time? Kashiwagi: I have something to deliver to you. <a soft thump of paper hitting the table> Principal: Th-This is...? Kashiwagi: 3,000,000 yen. Please accept it. Principal: Eh!? W-Why are you giving this to me...? Kashiwagi: Our next chairman is indebted to you for your assistance. Principal: Next... chairman? Kashiwagi: A young man by the name of Daigo Dojima. He came here, right? Principal: That fucker- ah, I mean, that gentleman, he's going to be the Tojo Clan's chairman..... Principal: Wow. I had no idea who visited me.... or that I'd get so much money........ Kashiwagi: Please don't trouble yourself with that. This money has no strings attached. Please continue on exactly as you were before. Principal: I-I just don't understand this... Kashiwagi: You listened to our soon to be chairman's request. This is the reward. Principal: Th-That was really worth 3 million yen? Kashiwagi: The next chairman, for some reason he really enjoyed that event for the children. Kashiwagi: Without you, he wouldn't have been as enthusiastic about starting out..... You understand, right? Principal: Uh-.... right, I got it! Absolutely, I pushed through anyone who voiced opposition! Kashiwagi: The next time you hold an event, the next chairman would be thrilled to take part. You have the gratitude of all of us, Principal. Principal: Ha, haha... Th-That sounds great! How could I ever refuse something like that... ha ha ha............. Kashiwagi: ......Around here, Omi remnants have been appearing frequently--which is your fault. <Music cuts out> Principal: ..................Eh? <Music gets ominous> Kashiwagi: You know they've been coming by wanting to collect on the money you blew on gambling and playing around. Kashiwagi: That's why, in order to collect that money, Omi have been loitering around the vicinity... Kashiwagi: Therefore, the real reason the children's event was cancelled, is you. Principal: Well.... that's.... Kashiwagi: Furthermore, you've been hiding this fact--hoping that the Tojo Clan might wipe out the Omi around the school before the cause of it ever came to light... Kashiwagi: But it didn't, and I think you've made this very difficult for us. Did I miss anything? Principal: ..................... Kashiwagi: ........Come now, to hold the children's event a dangerous group like the Omi was wiped out.... Kashiwagi: So it's all done and dusted... wouldn't you say, principal? Principal: Y-Y-Yes sir....? Kashiwagi: If something like this happens again... We'll have no choice but to bring down the hammer. Do you understand what I'm saying? Principal: O-Of course.... Something like this will never, ever, ever happen again, I swear..... Kashiwagi: Well, I'm thankful you understand things now. Coming here today was a good idea after all. Principal: Y-Yes sir... From now on I'm going to be on the straight and narrow.... Absolutely..... Kashiwagi: Haha, no need to go that far. ....Just make sure you don't cause problems for people again and you'll keep living just fine, Principal. Principal: Y-Yes sir... Of course....! Kashiwagi: If you'll excuse me then. I'll drop by to visit some other time. <Kashiwagi leaves> Principal: Hahahaha.... haaa....... I'm.... going to stop gambling..... <cut to the park> Takashi's friend: Takashi-kun. The scratcher event was a huge success! All the old men and ladies on this street loved it! Takashi: Yeah. Did everyone have fun?

Takashi's friend: Yeah, of course! Takashi: Nice! I better get thinking of how to make the next event even more interesting, it'll be so fun! Daigo: ...............

Man in black: Daigo-san, are we going to continue watching these children? (Tl note: BRO your own bodyguard calls you by first name???) Daigo: No, there doesn't seem to be any more Omi in this area. There's no need for further observation. Man in black: Understood. <Man leaves, Daigo gets a phone call> Daigo: Kashiwagi-san, what is it? Kashiwagi: I've just received information that a foreign mafia group is trying to expand into Kamurocho. Kashiwagi: Daigo, we need you back at HQ to start developing counter measures. Daigo: Got it, I'll be there shortly. <hangs up> Daigo: (It's just one thing after another huh... Well, this is the responsibility that comes with my position....) Daigo: (The job of the Tojo Clan's 6th Chairman, a role I'm starting to step up to)

<END>

Bonus time: 

can you imagine what that principal is going through. I know he’s a shit head and kind of deserved it but it’s just so so so funny to see Daigo and Kashiwagi bullying this guy

the most important thing about the entire event is that the scratchers looked like this

please enjoy a faceapp by @majimemegoro​ as well that made me wheeze

finally he can smile and not look like it’s hurting him immensely to do so

[marauder-exe]

Prompt List #2

Welcome to my biggest prompt list ever

if you wanna request something from this list, just use the character and ‘ prompt 34 from prompt list #2′ thank u!

Theres like 200 so be wary

Angst

“I love you ! Is that what you wanted to hear ?”

“I love him/her, and I know that I shouldn’t.”

“Can you just shut your mouth ?”

“wHY DO YOU KEEP LYING TO ME ?”

“We both know that I should walk away, but I can’t.”

“Wait, he/she has a girlfriend/boyfriend ?"

“I lo—-” “No, please… Don’t say that. You love her/him, not me.”

"Could you just take this pain away ? It hurts, so much… Help me.”

“You’re safe here, I got you.”

“Don’t ask her out again, please… You’re killing me, every single time you ask that.”

“Look, he/she wants you, just make him/her happy.”

“If you go, I’ll know that you never loved me.”

“We never were just friends, and you know it.” “I know it, but you deserve someone better than me.”

“SHE WAS CRYING BECAUSE OF YOU!!!”

“You love me like I’m the person who actually deserves your love.” “But you are the only one who deserves it.”

“I know for a fact that you’re not “fine”.”

“You’re looking at me like.. you’re disgusted. What did I do? Just tell me what I did, please!”

“What happened between us?”

“Nothing has changed!” “Yes it has, and you know it.”

“Love isn’t supposed to hurt this badly.”

“You said you needed space. You were 5,000 miles away for a year, and you’re still unsure. I’m starting to think that an entire universe apart wouldn’t be enough space for you.”

“I remember when he/she/they used to look at me that way”

“I want you to list every lie you ever told me. Then I’ll forgive you.”

“I don’t hate you. I hate that after all of this, you’re still trying to lie to me”

“I can’t keep this secret for you anymore.”

“I’m sorry I’m not what you signed up for.”

“Why she/her/them? It could have been anybody, and you chose to betray me with her/him/them.”

“This will be the last time you lie to me.”

“You never loved me, did you?”

“You made me miserable and I still loved you.”

“Everytime something goes well, I momentarily forget how much I despise you.”

“We’re never going to have a happy ending, just remember that.”

“Don’t pretend like you’re not happy to see me like this.”

“Your mind must be a horrible place.”

“Hand me the gun and I’ll kill him myself.”

“And I thought you loved me."

" And I thought I loved you."

" Aren't you even going to cry?"

“I didn’t expect you to wait forever. I just hoped…”

“Did you always know that you were going to leave?”

“If you cry, I’ll stay, and if I stay that will just give you another reason to hate me.”

“I’m addicted and at this point I don’t think anything could make me stop.”

”If you wanna know, then ask.”

“You never asked because you knew I wouldn’t tell you what you wanted to hear.”

“We grew apart, and at this point I’m glad.”

“Find somebody else to kiss your ass.”

“When are you going to stop clawing for something that’s never going to happen?”

“What you’re doing is going to kill you one day.”

“It was easier to believe that the you I knew was dead than deal with the fact that I still have to see you every day.”

“What you’re doing is going to kill you one day.”

Fluff

51. “You’re hair is really soft after you wash it.”

52. “Ssh. Stop fussing. I’m just braiding your hair.”

53. “You smell really nice.”

54. “Would it be all right if I borrowed your sweater? It smells like you.”

55. “I might have slept with your robe when you were gone.”

56. “If you steal the blankets, I am going to put my cold feet on you.”

57. “Here, let’s share the blanket.”

58. “You’re comfy.”

59.“You are very endearing when you are half-asleep.”

60.“But I want to hear you sing.”

61.“Don’t get up - I’ll do it.”

62.“Care to give me a back scratch?”

63.“I think I love you.”

64.“Your bed head is really cute.”

65.“How about a kiss?”

66.“You made this for me?”

67.Aw, you’re blushing.”

68. Uh oh, I know that look. What do you want?”

69. “Let me help you with that.”

70. “I don’t want to forget this moment.”

71.“Are you really flirting with me right now?”

72.“I like the way your hand fits in mine.”

73.“You have something in your hair, umm… Do you want me to get it out?”

74.“It’s nice that your voice was the first thing I heard today.”

75.“This movie is really scary, but you’re into it so I’m trying not to cover my face the whole time, but- WHAT IS THAT?”

76.“Wait, don’t pull away… Not yet.”

77.“Half the time I get too embarrassed to say anything”

78.“No, it’s fine.  I can wait until you’re done talking to them.”

79.“No, like…. It’s just, I can’t believe you’re actually wearing my clothes.”

80.“You’re a big piece of inspiration for this, honestly.”

81.“I’ve been trying to get ready for like an hour and a half, because I know you’re going to look so good and I need to try and match up.”

82.“I wanted to say “I love you” for the first time without stuttering, but that failed.”

83.“My friends get so annoyed by how much I talk about how sometimes.”

84.“No, mom, don’t tell him/her I said that about him/her!”

85.“I can’t get over how a few months ago I wanted to learn your name and now you’re having breakfast with me in my sweater.”

86.“ You are so beautiful — So fucking beautiful. “

87.“And just WHERE do you think you’re putting your hands?”

88.“Wow, you look even better in the daylight.”

89.“I don’t remember ever having this many hickeys. But I don’t mind.”

90.“We could order pizza and just stay like this all day.”

91.“It was always you.”

92.I love you in every possible way.”

93.“I didn’t mean to love you so much.”

94.“Don’t you hurt a single hair on his/her/their head.”

95.“Duck, you idiot!”

96.“Hey. Pal. I’ve got a wand and I’m not afraid to use it.”

97.“Shh, you’re safe. I won’t let you go.”

98.“It’s not a double date. We’re just third and fourth wheeling.”

99.“Look, I know we don’t know each other that well, but I’m still worried about you. No one deserves to be alone.”

100.“I remember practicing how to ask you out in the mirror..”

Sarcasm

101.“Define normal.” 

102.“Do I get bonus points if I act like I care?” 

103.“Just remember if we get caught, you’re deaf and I don’t speak English.” 

104.“Don’t look for any redeeming qualities. I don’t have any.” 

105.“It’s amazing how fast the world can go from bad to total shit storm.”

106.“I love you. You enormously stubborn pain in the ass.” 

107.“And you wonder why you’re still single.”

108.“Remind me to kill you. Please.” 

109.“That’s a little melodramatic, don’t you think?”

110.“She’s crazy. And just when you think you’ve reached the bottom of her craziness, there’s a crazy underground garage.” 

111.“She may seem like lollipops and rainbows but I bet behind close doors she’s latex and whips.”

112.“If my day gets any worse, I’m asking hell if they’re having an exchange program.” 

113.“Sorry. I don’t speak skank.” 

114.“My middle finger salutes you.” 

115.“I don’t have enough middle fingers to let you know how I feel.” 

116.Somebody’s cranky.” “Somebody needs to shut up.” 

117.“Oh darling. Go buy a brain.” 

118.“Frankly my dear, I don’t give a damn.” 

119.“All due respect, but that’s a bunch of crap.” 

120.“I am one of the few people in the world who can murder you and leave no forensic evidence behind.”

121.“Excuse me. I have to go make a scene.” 

122.“What did I tell you about calling her/him the devil?” “That it’s offensive to the devil?” 

123.“I heard that!” “You were supposed to!” 

124.“I need therapy after this.” 

125.“You didn’t get in trouble for lying. You got in trouble for lying badly.” 

126.“I turned out liking you a lot more that I originally planned.” 

127.“I think you’re weird.” “I think you’re boring.” 

128.“I’m afraid I’ve been thinking…” “A dangerous pastime.”

129.“Wow, there’s a big surprise. I think I’m going to have a heart attack and die from surprise.” 

130.“I’m gonna hit you so hard, it’ll make you ancestors dizzy.” 

131.“Sarcasm is the body’s natural reaction to stupidity.” 

132.“Well, excuse me, psychic wonder!” 

133.“Don’t look in her eyes, she might steal your soul.” 

134.“She’s hot, but she’s evil.” 

135.“Do I regret it? Yes. Would I do it again? Probably.” 

136.“I already know that I’m going to hell. At this point it’s really go big or go home.” 

137.“I’m not a damsel in distress. I’m a damsel doing damage.” 

138.“So stick that in your juice box and suck it.” 

139.“Never take life seriously. No one ever comes out alive anyway.” 

140.“Sometimes I question my sanity. Occasionally it replies.”

141.“Why should we date?” “Because we are attracted to each other.” “I am attracted to pie, but I do not feel the need to date pie.” 

142.“Neither one us is drunk enough for this conversation.” 

143.“You’re questioning my methods.” “I’m not questioning it, I’m saying it’s stupid.” 

144.“Wow, somebody needs a Happy Meal.” 

145.“I didn’t do it!��� “Then why are you laughing?” “Because whoever did it is a freaking genius.” 

146.“Idiots. I’m surrounded by idiots.” 

147.“You couldn’t handle me even if I came with instructions.

148.“Obviously you have mistaken me for somebody who gives a shit.” 

149.“Rule number one: don’t bother sucking up. I already hate you, that’s not going to change.” 

150.“You make no sense to me.” “Welcome to my life.” 

Drama

151.“Can you stop thinking about yourself for once?”

152.“Can you stop thinking about yourself for once?” 

153.“Don’t think I forgot about what you did last time.”

154.“I know you lied to me.”

155.“I’m not even sorry.”

156.“You backstabber!” 157.“I never want to see you again.” 158.“You never mattered to me.”

159.“I knew this was a bad idea.”

160.“Rot in hell.”

161.“It was supposed to be a secret!”

162.“No one loves me.” 163.“He/she/they is/are so petty…” 164.“You made me cry.” 165.“I don’t know who you are anymore.” 166.“How DARE you?!” 167.“I know you’re not talking to me…” 168.“I SAW you with him/her/them!”

169.“Just leave me alone.”

170.“What did you do?!” 171.“I told everyone that I didn’t want to talk but I’m actually dying for attention.”

172. “Just admit that was extra…”

173.“I forgive, but I don’t forget.” 174.“Did you see what he/she/they was/were wearing?” 175.“So what if I had sex with your ex?” 176.“There’s something I have to tell you…” 177.“I can’t do this anymore.” 178.“You weren’t there for me when I needed you the most.” 179.“I never loved you.” 180.“It’s too late.”

181.“Quit ignoring me.”

182. “Don’t you get it? It’s because I love you!”

183.“I love you. I’m sorry.”

184.“I don’t want to be friends.”

185.“Can we please pretend I never said that?”

186.“Friendzoned again.”

187.“You should’ve loved me when you had the chance.”

188.“Fuck you for toying with my emotions like that.”

189.“I was there for you when no one else was!”

190.“Alright – I can tell a ‘no’ when I hear it.”

191.“I’m sorry I acted so creepy.”

192.“Fuck. It’s like what they say – nice guys finish last…”

193.“I’m tired of keeping this secret. Even if you don’t love me back.”

194. “I knew that’d be your answer. That’s why I never told you before.”

195.“When I said I loved you, I meant it.”

196.“Is there any part of you, deep down, that might love me back?”

197.“You were the one that left all those notes for me?”

198.“You’re in a relationship with another person – you know this can’t end well.”

199.“We agreed this was just physical!”

200.“I love you. I know you don’t love me, so don’t say it back.”

Ahhh im sorry that was so long, but if you read all the way to here, your a real one.

Again i write for all Hp characters! Feel free to use these prompts as ur own

[ivyaugustetc]

the dead poets at hogwarts: a headcanon from hell

@aedan-mills @charlie-dalton-simp @pretentious-strikes YOU ENCOURAGED THIS BEHAVIOR SO YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO LIVE WITH THE CONSEQUENCES. also i love you a lot but THAT'S BESIDE THE POINT.

also @aedan-mills i found out that some of the wand stuff is related to their birthdays and i am much too lazy to look all that up and figure it all out, but anyone else is welcome to lmao. sorry to disappoint but alas it's summer and i don't want to research that much. but other than that, please listen to me flex my extensive knowledge on harry potter :)

neil (half blood): i'm sorry,,,, can you say gryffindor? this boy would get up there and in a second the sorting hat would have him all figured out: big dreams with the will to pursue them, but not ambitious enough to step over others to achieve said dreams? sounds like a gryffindor to me. i just know he'd thrive at hogwarts, probably going on to play quidditch (def a chaser) and would excel in charms class. as far as pets go, i feel like he'd stay simple and classy with a chill barn owl he'd name after a famous broadway actor. he would kind of be a mix of james and remus, in which he's wild and crazy but still manages to get good grades. the teachers love him simply because they don't know much about him outside of class. he would absolutely LOVE going to hogsmeade and going batshit crazy at zonko's and honeydukes. he'd have a whole phase where he gets addicted to licorice wands and everyone else thinks they're disgusting but he simply cannot buy enough of them. he'd play a bunch of zonko tricks on the rest of the poets, saving the most harsh for charlie and the most wholesome for todd <3

todd (muggle born): ugh see i can see him being both a hufflepuff and a ravenclaw, but my heart says hufflepuff so i'm gonna go with that. he would absolutely HATE the sorting ceremony with a burning passion. getting up in front of everybody only to have a hat judge u??? no thanks. HAHAHA CAN YOU IMAGINE HIM ON A BROOM. i can't either because he would simply never get on one, probably referring to them as "flying death traps" more often than not. "hey todd, you think about joining quidditch?" "no thanks, i'd rather keep my limbs intact ;)". but he would love muggle studies a lot, even if the teacher was boring as hell. snape would scare the hell out of him for sure, resulting in his lowest class being potions. he would excel in classes that are more learning out of the book rather than in practice. for a pet, he'd want something that could not possibly turn on him and would just be sweet and loving, so ima give him a toad :) he'd name it something fancy and british, like nigel or sumn. and because of nigel, he'd love chocolate frogs because hey they're twins!!

fanon knox (pure blood): hogwarts fuck boy. okay well maybe not f boy but like...his favorite part is the fact that this is a co-ed school rather than an all-boys school so he can spy on both genders equally yknow. hmm i get hufflepuff vibes from him because he's a big romantic, sucker for cute relationships, etc. he would enjoy whichever class his current crush is in, although I feel like he'd do well with classes that involved spells and wand work mostly lmao. he'd want a really fucking cute pet, so i'd give him a kneazle (it's like a cat but a bit more lion like). he'd give it a strong sounding name, something german idk. but he'd love the shit out of that kneazle, i can tell you that much. i feel like he'd try out for quidditch his first few years, not make it on, and then make it on to the team around fourth year and somehow end up team captain in seventh (and that proves kids, that you too can have a redemption arc in sports). as far as candy goes, ima say he likes the super sour candy like acid pops n shit. like i feel like the others would dare him to each as much sour candy as he can and then he wouldn't be able to taste for a week. but he'd think it was worth it :)

cameron (muggle born): good god this boy just wants to learn. magic just fascinates him, what with growing up in a big muggle family (bestie he is the weasleys if they were all type a). he's a ravenclaw, no questions asked. he would love classes involving preciseness and attention, things like potions and transfiguration. i feel like he'd have a cute, stable relationship along the way ofc because he deserves so much love and happiness and UGH he's a baby. he'd stick with a lil ginger cat, naming it after one of the famous wizards he's read about. he would love spending christmas at the school and going places when the ground are nearly empty, enjoying the scenery. for candy, he'd go plain and simple with chocolate frogs. can't go wrong with those. he'd still have fun with his friends, but he'd skip a lot of parties for some studying (don't judge, i do it too lmao). would not play quidditch but would enjoy it, end of story.

charlie (pure blood): slytherin. don't dispute it. think the weasley twins but even more flirtatious. he would be a regular at every single party that happened, flirting with the guys and gals shamelessly and drinking butterbeer like it was water. look me in the eye and tell me he would not absolutely fucking HATE GILDEROY LOCKHART WITH EVER FIBER OF HIS BEING. he'd do spot-on impersonations of him though. teacher's worst enemy. like when he walks into class on the first day, every teacher collectively mutters "bloody hell not this kid again". asks the most incredibly stupid questions ("okay but is there a spell to turn my eyebrows green? just the eyebrows though, not my hair"). he would be the most aggressive beater on the slytherin team, though he would never deliberately try to hit someone, just distract the shit out of them ("put the fear of god in them and fate will do the rest"). he'd want a loud, aggressive pet but he'd probably end up with a mean cat that hisses at everyone. he'd give it the most adorable name that just. does not fit the personality. something like priscilla. for candy, he'd take his chance with bertie botts' every flavour beans and just roll with the punches. he's chaotic like that.

pitts (half blood): ASTRONOMY IS HIS JAM. he fucking loves that class. he tutors the entire ravenclaw house in that class. he's the guy that little first years who are terrified of the class go to when they're completely lost and don't understand what's going on. besides that, i feel like he'd just be everyone's cool older brother yknow? like he'd be in charge of helping all the first years figure out where stuff is and giving them advice to help them and stuff. he would be a die-hard quidditch fan although he would not play the sport (maybe recreationally on the weekends and holidays and stuff, but the fact that it's so fucking dangerous just does not appeal to him). he'd like the candy that does tricks and stuff, like fizzing whizbees and stuff. he gives me charlie weasley vibes, where he's hardcore in certain areas (in his case, astronomy) and just flipping chill in anything else. cool older brother vibes, man. it fits.

meeks (half blood): i've said it once and i'll say it again: nonproblematic ginger dumbledore. also a hufflepuff <3 this dude just wants to fucking coast along, getting good grades and not participating in the dumb shit that could probably get him killed (even though he would in a heartbeat if his friends were in danger. duh). he'd be a teacher's favorite, probably having conversations with his favorite teachers during free time. okay ik this isn't technically at school, but i swear to god he would be dumbledore one day. like he would be the chill ass headmaster who gets shit done while also being very la di da life is nice flowers are pretty type of person. that being said, his favorite candy is and has been lemon drops ever since dumbledore got him addicted to them. his favorite classes would be potions (he'd surprisingly get along well with snape) and he'd just be great and mixing shit right and just knowing how much of stuff to add in ("how much powdered root do i add?" "about three and a half shakes." "that's not a measurement, meeks." "*shrug* it works"). he'd stick with his small friend group and love them to death, but he'd be a friend to all really. he'll help anyone that comes to him asking for help with homework (and though he won't admit it, he gets super prideful when it's someone a few years ahead of him).

stick (muggle born): harry potter if harry potter could've been more harry potter. like he would just be a part of everything and end up being part of some prophecy that demands he'd save the world and at first he'd be like HEY i'm just a small boy but then he'd grit his teeth and finesse the shit out of this preventing the end of days stuff. he'd definitely be a gryffindor, and fucking proud of it. he'd be the seeker on the quidditch team because he is so short and small and yeah he'd fucking kill it there. he'd kind of be the shy one no one expected much from, but once he starts absolutely wrecking the shit out of the other houses' quidditch teams, he'd become sorta popular? like people would invite him to parties and stuff and he's too nice to say no, but he'd mostly just hang around the outskirts, saying hi to the other poets if he saw them and mostly talking to chris and ginny (danburry, not weasley). he'd like defense against the dark arts and minerva mcgongiall would become his literal mother i can't explain it. he'd have an owl as a pet and treat it like it was his own child, telling it thank you every time it brought his mail or took his mail. as for candy, he'd like drooble's bubble gum because the bubbles are all magic and shit and i just feel like that would make him so happy <3

chris (pure blood): the older sister lesbian <3 she'd be a sweet hufflepuff who would be friends with everyone while also being the greatest socialite the school has ever seen. you know that party that practically the entire school attended and talked about for months on end? she planned that shit. she'd be like pitts in the respect that she'd help all the first years find their way in the school and in life in general. she's just such a warm and kind person that everyone would love her. she's have a little pink pygmy puff to match ginny's purple one, and she'd give it such a perfect, human name like lila or something. she'd be great at muggle studies and all the teachers would love her. also every one is so invested in her relationship with ginny it's adorable. he favorite candy is acid pops even though they make her eyes water like crazy. she'd make pretty good grades, every once in a while getting one slightly lower than she'd expected, but she always manages to bring them up to her satisfactory level :) she would not play quidditch, but she would go all out to support ginny, even though they're in different houses. that's what i call love, baby.

ginny (half blood): the mom lesbian <3 she's a ravenclaw and also one of the sweetest people in the whole school. while chris helps other with the social aspect, ginny will help anyone in any subject they need help with (she and meeks are a help duo on this). she's quieter and less social than chris, but she's one of the best chasers the ravenclaw quidditch team has ever seen. she'd end up team captain by fifth of sixth year. she'd be like oliver wood in that she is sO invested in the team's success that at sometimes she'll go a bit crazy, but chris is always there to help her put things back into perspective <3. she'd make stellar grades of course, being good friends with all of her teachers. her favorite candy would be the sweetest things like fairy floss. as previously stated, she'd have a purple pygmy puff to match chris's pink one, and she'd also give it an adorable human name like lisa or something. ginny's just sweet to everyone, especially neil and his friends.

I DID IT. IT TOOK FOREVER AND A FEW HAIL MARYS BUT I DID IT. enjoy besties <3 love u all

[mechanicalinertia]

Finished Edgerunners last night. Some thoughts:

1. It was… okay, overall. Like, a 7.5/10. It embraced modern genre cliches with aplomb for better and for worse, but the plot was… better than I expected from a Trigger anime. Clearly, having a bunch of Polish guys do that end of the work improved the anime over, say, Promare, or Franxx. Thank fucking christ.

2. On that note, I’ve begun browsing through the AO3 for tag for Edgerunners and it is nothing but fix-fics, I mean it’s incredible how many people want David and Rebecca to live. There are various ways people go about this. Among them: Peggy Sue time travel stories, Lucy telling David to not put on Maine’s arms before the timeskip, a ninja saving Lucy from Faraday. The one I like the most, though, is the one where Smasher spares David and Yorinobu Arasaka - that’s right, the only Arasaka with dignity - gives him a new cyberbody, while Rebecca is rescued by Rogue. So the characters are apart but could come together soon.

3. Am I jealous that these fics all are racking up thousands of views in a little more than a month compared to even Divine Patronage? Hell yes. But I don’t know how to get in on this game for two reasons. One, Edgerunners never really gave me too much emotional attachment — I knew everyone was gonna die based on the trailer where they cite the “it’s not how you live, it’s how you die” line (Classic cyberpunk neoliberal nihilism, see my previous post for why I hate that shit), so watching Rebecca die was just kinda eh, whatever. I think most people like Rebecca just ‘cause they’re horny. If they want more of that, hey, Gunsmith Cats has a horny murder-loli as well, they can go watch the OVA for that or read the manga or whatever. Two, I don’t like Edgerunners’ basic universe enough to not cross it over with my own bullshit Bubblegum Crisis 206X universe, and that inevitably leads to thousands of lost views who have no idea what BGC is and don’t want to find out.

4. What’s funny about the first episode is that its ‘call to adventure’, if you want to get all Campbellian, is a side to cyberpunk universes that I don’t think has really been done too much in anime or visual media I’ve seen. (It probably has been done better I just haven’t seen a whole lot of media.) The whole idea of everything having a price, it being impossible for someone like David or his mom to move up in the world — especially since his bullies can just beat the shit out of him whenever they please — feels at once goofy and plausible, and in those last few minutes you can feel the tension rise as David makes his choice. But then after that it’s off to the races, all cyber-murder and heists and the kind of stuff you expect from what cyberpunk means to people nowadays, a glitzy future aesthetic where life is meaningless so you might as well kill as many corporate / themed-gang goons as possible before going out with a bang. (I guess I need to watch Blade Runner Black Lotus to see if Production IG did anything different for a far more somber franchise, but they sure as hell didn’t for SAC_2045, the bastards.) It might have actually been more interesting for Gloria to not be the Anime Dead Mom, and be in critical care, constantly chastising David for what he’s doing but unable to formulate an alternative. My point is there was potential, and the potential was — squandered isn’t the right word, that implies it wasn’t deliberate. Ignored! Yes. Ignored, that’s the right word.

5. In spite of all my inability to get emotionally attached to pretty much anyone except David and Lucy… well, I like David and Lucy. They’re characters that are developed well enough, and David isn’t really your usual shonen-jump protag but more a depressed wreck only able to actualize himself through ultimately meaningless violence. It’s not as though he really accomplishes his goal of getting Lucy to the moon anyway, ‘cause what good is that if he can’t be with her? So now that I think about it, I understand the sentiment of wanting these characters to live, and that’s what fanfiction is for, and there’s no shame in that. (I’m Rebecca neutral, to be honest. There’s not enough character development there to figure out who she is as a person besides horny for Timeskip David Of Considerable Size.)

6. Well, I guess I’m a hypocrite, because I’m writing a new crossover fanfic that will hopefully follow on from Anatomy of a Lovedoll. It’s called The Witch of Tranquility, and so far it’s only a prologue proposing an alternate timeline where Hanako offs her dad and sells its assets to GENOM, thereby crossing over the two universes. I’ve got a timeline written, too, but I’m holding off on posting it for now. It’s not as though explaining the crossover will make more people read it.

Well, we’ll see how things go, there. Edgerunners could not dethrone Bubblegum Crisis in my heart, but then again I didn’t expect it to. I could compare the two, but there’s no point. Let people enjoy things. I enjoyed Edgerunners. It was good. But it wasn’t great.

[guqin-and-flute]

Eiher PTL! I just read the last chapter with a-yuan and it's Good and Cute but then the last scene happened and I just. BABY???? BABY /NOW/??? I THOUGHT THAT HAPPENED WAY LATER ON

(UGH I WROTE A WHOLE REPLY TO THIS AND MY BROWSER CRASHED ASIDFJAOSJ FUCK)

Your vote has been counted!! (and everyone else's :) ) WHY THANK YOU, I'm glad you liked it!! And YEAH BABY NOW! :D Or at least, very very start to baby.

Yeah, All the Things You Have to Lose is a few months after the end of Are You Here to Stop Me (which spans roughly a month when all is said and done? So far?) So about a gestational period amount after! Here, I'm just gonna lay out the timeline I currently have under the cut for anyone who's curious and for people to avoid spoilers if they want cause I'm super chatty tonight and laying out a BUNCH of stuff because I'm EXCITED and I don't want to be the only person who knows ;A;

It goes a little something like this (roughly);

➡Marriage (Flower of Another Kind) (Internal Time ~1 month)

⬇

~1 month

➡Courting (In Your Hands) (Undecided Internal Time, depending on Things™, probably about a month or two)

⬅Baby-making sexy times start around here

⬇

1-2 Months

➡WWX core reveal (Stop Forcing It)

⬇

~>1 month

➡Wen Rescue (Are You Here to Stop Me?) (Internal time of about a month. Probably. Maybe.)

⬇

~5-7 months (~1+ year after marriage)

➡Jiang Bell and freak out (All the Things You Have to Lose)

⬇

A few weeks

BABY Yixin!! (100 Days WIP), Hey, Zixuan isn't the worst, please give him a chance (Zixuan POV WIP), Hey what's up I'm 🎶still a piece of garbaaage🎶(Nighthunting at the Jins >:) WIP), 🔪 (Retaliation WIP) (All within, like, a few weeks)

That being said, JGY was...definitely not expecting a kid this soon, especially with Yanli's help. He's obviously not in a great headspace and we're getting around to conversations in In Your Hands about families and stuff, so it's definitely not a surprise to him (I mean, he DEFINITELY knows where babies come from) But he keeps trying to play parallel paths of probability right up until 'Nighthunting at the Jins >:)' (which WILL get a better name, promise) where he gets a bit of a wakeup call and is like 'Oh, my dad super sucks, actually and I'm gonna stay here forever. Wow, this doesn't feel like a surprise, when did I decide that?' And his brain's like 'When you decided to have a kid, dipshit.' He does not have a good handle on his brain; he likes to THINK he does, but he's basically in panic mode 👆 this entire year

It's in Retaliation that he decides to Super Kill his dad, tho 🙃 That one's fun. ('Cause what's an AU without deciding that JGS deserves to die?)

[lightrises]

"Only in allowing her to pass..." — Hornet, The Radiance, and the means by which Hallownest turned its victims against each other

A quick note: I read Hollow Knight as an anti-colonialist text. As such I'll be touching on topics related to colonialism as it's depicted in the world of the game, and said analysis will reflect both a sympathetic take on The Radiance and a critique of The Pale King that won't pull its punches. If this sounds up your alley, hello and thank you for the read! Let us be sad about these bugs together.

———

So!! A while back I realized something about pre-canon that felt rather... "curious" is one way to put it, I think. To wit: for all the effort and scheming and determination The Pale King poured into trying to get rid of The Radiance, neither of his plans involved directly killing her.

Was that his long game? Well, sure, that seems clear enough. His tack changed from luring the moths away from their god and creator to a more literal form of incarceration once the infection became a factor, but at its core the end goal never really changed—The Pale King very sincerely wished to destroy Radiance via obsolescence. The Seer lends us foreshadowing to confirm as much:

[Image descriptions: Two screenshots from Hollow Knight, showing the Seer and Ghost in the Seer's alcove at the Resting Grounds. Across both screenshots, the Seer tells Ghost the following: "None of us can live forever, and so we ask those who survive to remember us. Hold something in your mind and it lives on with you, but forget it and you seal it away forever. That is the only death that matters." End description.]

(Which, by the way and given the context, talk about an extremely unsubtle allusion to cultural genocide huh!!! Whew.)

In any case, we're left with a whole bunch of machinations which build up to... well, two very roundabout attempts at committing deicide. That's kind of weird, all things considered! Why not just do the deed in one fell swoop and get it over with?

This could be for any number of reasons. Maybe the king was devoid of the means to instantly kill another higher being. Maybe his personal sense of scruples stopped him short of signing off on MURDER murder (although, y'know, the aforementioned genocide + eternal imprisonment = still cool and copasectic apparently!). Maybe the long drawn-out cruelty was the point. Maybe the idea of playing fuckign 4D chess with the circumstances was too delicious for him to pass up—that man did love to tinker and stick his claws where they sure as hell didn't belong—or maybe it was a little bit of All The Things. Who knows!!

But interrogating The Pale King's methodology on this count isn't what I'm here for, at least not really. The main reason I raise this question at all is that in her own way, Hornet did too.

"I'd urge you to take that harder path... "

See, going by The Pale King's actions and what The White Lady explicitly says, they both foresaw two outcomes wrt the infection: it can be allowed to spread, or it can be contained. At Teacher's Archives, Quirrel acknowledges the fact that Ghost is expected to do... something about this, but he doesn't elaborate on what HE thinks that's supposed to be apart from the obvious "Gotta bust into Black Egg Temple first". Hornet is the one person who presents to us—to Ghost—what's framed as a third option: confront and destroy the infection at its source.

And she doesn't bring it up like it's just another tactic for Ghost to consider, prim and indifferent to what they would do. She nudges them towards it, actively, up to the point where she throws herself into the fray against Hollow at a juncture that's uniquely dangerous to her and her alone just to make that option feasible.

Even when she's couching it in disclaimers that this is still Ghost's decision to make (and let's be fair, she's extremely not wrong about that lol), no one can pretend Hornet is unbiased. It's obvious in that buttoned-down Hornet kind of way that she is way the hell done with the increasingly tenuous stalemate that's kept Hallownest's desiccated corpse from collapsing in on itself. Personally it's hard for me not to read some Toriel Undertale-esque "My father was too entrenched in his own foolishness to pursue any course of action that would have DEFINITIVELY ended this" shade into her stance here, regardless of whether that's strictly true in canon.

And that bit—Hornet's hopes for an end to Hallownest's stasis, moreover her grim calculation of what needs to be done to get there—that's the bit I find super interesting but likewise tragic and depressing as shit, on multiple levels. In no small part because a) canon itself gestures towards Hornet feeling conflicted about the very plan she's pushing, and moreover b) she has at least two (2) damn good reasons to feel that way.

So, what do I mean by that? Let's look here first:

[Image description: A screenshot from Hollow Knight, of Hornet and Ghost inside the Temple of the Black Egg, standing in front of the unsealed egg itself. Hornet has been struck by the Dream Nail and her dialogue is displayed as follows: "... Could it achieve that impossible thing? Should it?" End description.]

As the curtain is about to drop on things one way or another, Hornet thinks,

... Could it achieve that impossible thing? Should it?

Now, looking at that last bit it's easy to go "Oh no, Hornet's worried that Ghost won't survive killing The Radiance!" And I do think that's part of it: Hornet is, categorically, not her father. By endgame it's clear she's not content to view her Void-borne siblings as tools to be used then disposed of. She's also well aware that as a healthy autonomous Vessel amongst the countless dead, Ghost is the only person left alive who has a fighting chance against The Radiance. Knowing someone is the only qualified candidate for the job doesn't make encouraging them to embrace a probable death sentence any less of a bitter pill to swallow, though. And odds are on that this sentiment extends to Hollow too, who IS going to die no matter what happens here. To put it bluntly, it's more than reasonable to conclude that Hornet hates the absolute fuck out of this.

But I don't think that's all there is to it either. Remember what I said earlier about The Pale King's bids for genocide? Well, it's not like the man deigned to limit his efforts to just the moth tribe.

"We do not choose our mothers... "

On top of everything else—an infected Hallownest being all she's ever known, the fact that she only exists because of the infection, the list goes on—Hornet has spent her life wedged into a position that's been uncomfortable and terminally unglamorous at best: she is both a daughter of her father's kingdom and of Deepnest.

Deepnest, which like the moths and many others was here long before the wyrm and his lady wife swanned onto the scene and the God Become Bug laid claim to everything the Light touched plus a considerable amount of change. THAT Deepnest, which has fought claw and thread to retain its sovereignty against same-said settler king, and for which Herrah not only surrendered her life but also agreed to bed her worst enemy, all in hopes of securing a viable future for her people (put a pin in that last part by the way, I'll come back to it soon).

Two Worlds, One Family (Ft. An Indigenous Woman Trying Her Damndest To Work With What She's Got Versus An Imperialist Who Only Signed Up For This Because He Needed The Political Favor THAT Badly, So It's The Height Of Dysfunctional Actually). Fun times!!!!

The baggage this entails for Hornet is gnarly enough without implications made by The White Lady and the pre-canon timeline of events and even Team Cherry's dev notes that the king may well have looked at baby Hornet, gone "YOINK", then ensured she spent the lion's share of her childhood reared within the pearly auspices of his Pale Court*. That would be rather advantageous for Him Specifically after all, the potential to mold a born foe into a future ally and even have her trained in combat under the same tutelage as her doomed sibling. And far be it from him to stop a grown Hornet—his own flesh and blood too!—from making Deepnest her forever home if she so pleased. He totally wouldn't be reneging on his "fair bargain made" by doing this one simple thing until Hornet came of age, not t e c h nic c a l l y.

If that is indeed the case, there's a non-zero chance Hornet's formative years were a hot mess of cultural alienation and being a good deal more privy than most to just how much of a bastard her father could be. There's an equally non-zero chance that at some point she stood or sat within earshot as The Pale King finally, finally dropped all pretense and euphemism to name the Light for precisely what (for who) it was.

See, in conjunction with the question that started this whole dang train of thought I've been asking this one too: Does Hornet know? When she speaks of confronting "the heart of [the] infection" does she know she's talking about not just a literal person but someone very specific? The Radiance, who god though she may be shares skin in the game alongside Hornet as a native woman screwed over by the same settler king, likewise deprived of her kin and saddled with a life gone horrendously pear-shaped?

I'll assume for the sake of exploring the possibility and because I think it's a likely one anyway that yes, Hornet does know. She knows, and despite everything can't help empathizing. She might even look at Radiance and see bits and pieces both reflected and slightly inversed in her own mother: Radiance was forced to the sidelines while her people—her children, the brood she was meant to lead and care for—died out under The Pale King's rule, and it's no stretch to assume she's at least as upset about that as she has been about everything else; Herrah too took drastic measures for her people's sake, trying to head off annihilation by relegating herself to the sidelines in an act that was as much calculated risk as an attempt to find wiggle room and leverage in the face of a nasty proposition.

A calculated risk that, if things continue as they are, might well amount to nothing as the rest of Deepnest gets eaten alive by the infection. It survived The Pale King's advances for so so long, only to fall here. Herrah's sacrifice would be for naught; the other tribes—themselves the king's victims—would keep succumbing to the infection too.

And this is where things fall apart.

"... or the circumstance into which we are born."

Let's be clear: I think Hornet is wise enough to know what's what here, that all the carnage and suffering falls on her father's head for starting this slow-motion trainwreck in the first place. Hallownest wasn't always Hallownest. This domain was Radiance's home first, along with many others. It was the worm-turned-king who rolled up on the scene unsolicited and decided this was a ""'problem""" that had to be """solved""".

But the fact of the matter is that he's gone and The Radiance is here, raging, seemingly inconsolable. Above and beyond being Deepnest's rightful heir, Hornet isn't in a position to countenance more splash damage even if the grief and fury fueling it makes perfect sense. She can understand without ever bringing herself to love Radiance, and she can bend her knee to practicality even if she hates the everloving shit out of it because the fact that it "has" to end this way isn't fair.

This lends itself to one last awful conclusion: that Hornet has probably considered and (rightly or wrongly) discarded the possibility that Radiance can be saved, at least not without dragging more collateral along for the ride. If even her mother and every other enemy to the king seemed to dismiss talking Radiance down as an option way back when... well. Why should Hornet hope for any better after things have escalated so far?

Again, it's practical. A practical net good is what Hornet strives for. And again, it fucking sucks.

For extra tragedy points, this makes Hornet's extended crypticness around Ghost followed by her last minute casting about for a reason to tell them "Wait, don't; not just yet" that she never voices even more of a gut punch. She can't bring herself to burden Ghost with the context that haunts her so, least of all when it might weaken their resolve to go through with what (she thinks) needs doing.

It's the "same song, different verse" which led to the mantis tribe and Deepnest being pitted against each other: Hallownest rigged the game so that two women who could have been powerful allies—who have a mutual vested interest in driving out settler rule—wound up poised as enemies instead. And how awful is that? The king for all his being extremely fucking dead still gets the last laugh, because outside of a miracle the game never manifests Hornet can salvage what her mother started and look forward to a future where Deepnest pulls itself back from the brink if and only if The Radiance dies.

Resolution comes at the price of a completed genocide. Add two more dead siblings to the unconscionable pile thereof, while we're at it. That's what it boils down to whether or not Hornet can bear to articulate it as such, and there's no grace or even a properly bittersweet ending to wring from this clusterfuck. And that is rough.

———

* This has been better explained elsewhere, but a quick rundown: The White Lady tells Ghost that Hornet and Herrah "were permitted little time together." On its surface this can be taken to mean that Hornet was still very young when Herrah was shipped off to Eternal Dreamland—except this doesn't jive with the fact that we meet Hornet as an adult. If the stasis kicked in once the Dreamers went to their rest, which in turn halted the aging process for every living bug in Hallownest, AND before all this Hornet experienced little by the way of quality time with her birth mother... I think you can see where I'm going with this.

To top it off we've got Team Cherry weighing in ominously from their dev notes on Herrah: "As part of the agreement for her alliance and her role as a dreamer, King gave her a child (Hornet). Was she allowed to keep this child or was she taken away?" This isn't confirmation by itself of course, but given additional canon details (see above): Can I get a "yikes" in the chat fellas.