#except the earliest ones because no one needs to see that shit

[littlebigplanet]

tonight's plan is get home from work play fortnite for three hours and finally put a tag on all my original posts

[rowlfthedog]

I’m kind of surprised no one’s ever been in my inbox like “you are SEVERELY misinterpreting Rowlf the Dog. For this you will PAY.” Because I’ve felt that way (in private) about people’s wildly inaccurate headcanons for various fandoms before. To be entirely fair Rowlf is rather simple, but I love to make shit up based on how I think his various media appearances would connect to each other if this was ever acknowledged in canon. Random headcanon post I’m writing up instead of eating breakfast.

Guy who says “penny for your thoughts?” To his patrons at the bar and is kind to all, except he not-so-secretly thinks that One Guy he was in commercials with (Baskerville) is super irritating and wishes he could get away from him. Guy who is kind to all and very passionate about positive healthy children’s media (Jim used Rowlf to pitch Sesame Street)! Even if he does NOT want his own kids. Maybe you’ve seen how he interacts with his Nephew on Jimmy Dean. Appreciates the youth even if they get him irritated. Guy who swears about washed up celebrities on late night tv while he treats himself to a beer or a cigar before bed going to bed at 9 pm. Guy who used to be a lot more eager to be a film star when he was younger and tv was in black and white. Guy who was pretty ready to settle down and quit auditioning at the beginning of the muppet movie, but figured oh what the hell, these guys seem like they need the help of someone seasoned in this area. Everyone thinks he’s one of the most talented people they’ve met. He doesn’t talk about his past in the entertainment business much.

Even though I could not care less about shipping, I think piano duet is really cute. I’ve also seen Rowlf/Kermit since those two have appeared together in media forever since they’re some of Jim’s earliest characters. I appreciate the intent behind these, but I honestly do not see anyone being close enough to Rowlf to even know his exact age or family life. They’re all friends, sure, but I think that once it’s time to clock out he kinda just slinks away to go take a walk and head to sleep. His house smells like beer, smoke, dog, and Old Man. It is somehow kind of pleasant. It gets stuck in your clothes if you visit him. He does not get a lot of visitors. Rowlf is a lot more “dog” than everyone assumes just by interacting with him casually in a work setting. He still takes his long walks. If you ask first he really does love being scratched behind the ears.

[amywritesthings]

SILVER UNDERGROUND / deleted scene 02.

the first face i saw. :: an alternate version, aka the first draft, of that forest moment in chapter nine.

welcome to my segment of deleted scenes, levi's pov, and alternative 'almosts' that didn't quite make the published cut. this scene was the very first thing i wrote for this story! this is the earliest know blurb of SU. originally it was quite abrupt, and i much prefer the buildup that ended up happening in the story. may this be a lesson to writers: write the dang thing, don't agonize about a perfect scene, because when you go back to edit the epiphany of how you really want the scene to go will just come naturally! this is unedited. 1.2K words / explicit language, fighting. :: please remember: this is additional deleted content, not tied to the current canon of the story.

“I’m not going back.”

Levi is expressionless, but there is a hint of anger in his clipped question. “So you’re disobeying direct orders?”

“You didn’t order me, sir,” you reply. “You only suggested I go back. There’s a distinct difference.”

“Don’t be a smartass.”

Except the murmur is a thinly-veiled threat and nothing more. Somehow you’re confident enough about it that you take a few steps forward into the wide gap between you.

“You need the numbers,” you urge.

“No, shithead, what I need is for you to leave.”

“Why?”

“Disobeying orders and questioning your superior. Are you trying to rack up all possible offenses in one night?”

“I am trying to understand why you’re so adamant about giving the squad one less body in the lineup when we’ve already lost so many people—”

“Enough.”

“—and back-up would be at least a day away on horseback, which means we’re sitting ducks until we work together to get out of the forest with as many people alive as we—”

“I said enough, cadet,” Levi barks, and something ignites in you.

Something toxic that leads you to take another step forward, teeth bared.

“I’m not a fucking cadet, Levi, so stop pretending I don’t know what I’m talking about.”

The swear is not as surprising as hearing his first name on your tongue. If you didn’t know any better, then you would swear Levi is just as surprised. A tick of his brow is the giveaway: both move from their typical neutral position, and suddenly the air feels thick around you.

“Do you?” he challenges, low and dangerous as he mirrors your step forward. “Because last I checked, you were just some dumbass with a fucked up memory.”

The insult stings its intended target. You wince, but hold your ground.

“I was once on this squad, sir.”

“That doesn’t mean shit in the present.”

“It does to me,” you confess. Your voice raises to shout. “It matters that I fought! It matters that I’m here. I don’t know why you hate me so much—”

“I thought it would be obvious by now,” Levi flatly interrupts.

You trudge closer towards your captain, but he minds the gap for you: one step of his boot and he’s eye-to-eye with you, here, in the middle of this clearing.

The green flecks in the gray of his eyes bring some sickening softness to your belly, quelling a fraction of the fire within. It reminds you of summertime and darkness. A dichotomy of things you once loved — and things that once scared you.

Levi stares head on, seemingly disinterested in your shouting.

Yet when your eyes drop to his arm, you see the most obvious tell of all: his fist is pale, fingers gripped in a white-knuckle ball of restraint.

So you ask the first question that comes to mind:

“Then why do you want me to live so badly?”

By the sound of his breath hitching in his throat, it’s safe to assume your question has caught Humanity’s Strongest off guard. Painfully earnest, the words are woven in a confusion threatening to choke the life out of you. And Levi — Levi is four shades of enraged, glaring straight through you.

“I don’t give a shit if you live,” Levi corrects with a snarl.

“You don’t?”

“No.”

“Then allow me to stay.”

“No.”

Your chin tilts. “Then why—”

“Why do you want to die so fucking bad?” he snaps, his spit hitting your cheek. “Why bother waking up in that fucking rubble if all you wanted to do was throw away your second chance?”

His anger almost leaves you speechless.

Almost.

Except this feeling, this mindless fight, is the most familiar with the world as you’ve felt since waking up in that hospital. As if you like shouting, ready to throw fists.

As if you enjoy Levi yelling at you.

“Yours was the first face I saw when I woke up, sir,” you bite in response, forcing his jaw to clench. “I didn’t receive the recommendation for reinstatement out of thin fucking air. I went through modified training. I watched you visit the camps between missions. You didn’t have to check up on me, but you did.”

Levi’s mouth twitches.

“For someone who claims they don’t give a shit if I live you sure have a mighty big hand in the pot to ensure my safety, so what the fuck is the real reason behind ordering that I go back to the Walls?”

You manage to relay your monologue of grievances uninterrupted. Something dark brews behind Levi’s stormy eyes, stuck on your wide-eyed gaze.

“You’re insufferable, you know that?” he asks, low and steady, but there’s a glimmer of something else in his voice.

If it was anyone else, then it might have been something close to fondness, but it can’t be.

“Yeah?" you challenge. "Well, trying to keep up with your snarky ass, I couldn’t—”

You're pushed back by the sheer force of his lips.

His...

Your eyes open, then widen, at the sight of Levi Ackerman pressing a kiss to your mouth. Your body responds before you even understand why -- you drag him closer, hands buried in his hair, and respond in kind.

Everything feels too hot and too cold. Everything feels... good. You kiss back with such intensity that you feel his teeth.

Your world goes blank.

.

.

.

.

“What was that all about?” Petra’s voice comes out monotone, awaking you for a moment of dissociation.

Truthfully? You wish you had an answer.

You barely remember Levi telling you to go back to camp to rest.

You can't think of anything else except that:

The tingle of his lips pushed against yours lingers long after he’s departed.

There is a haze in your brain that takes over the fog of your amnesia, settling on a feeling beyond all else: warmth.

Even if you nearly went fist to fist with the Captain — a stupid, costly mistake — everything in your body is warm in the cool midnight air.

Maybe it was a mistake.

No, it was a mistake.

(One that the squad cannot know about, for both of your sakes.)

“We fought,” you provide just as flat.

“I know,” she says. “I heard. You used to do that a lot.”

You turn to study the glow of green on her back from her cloak.

“Argue to the brink of a fight,” she clarifies. “With Levi.”

When you say nothing, she cranes her chin over her shoulder. Although she doesn’t smile, her tone is melodic. Cheery, like there’s something funny between the lines.

“Before, you didn’t mind getting in his face if you two disagreed. I’ve never seen Levi get so angry. It’s a wonder he never punished you.”

So this was a common occurrence.

Did he always end it with a kiss?

Your warmth begins to fade as Petra’s words catch up to you, and you squeeze the fist at your side. “How much did you hear?”

“Don’t worry,” she assures, poking the dying embers with a stick. “I didn’t eavesdrop.”

[ruffboijuliaburnsides]

So you like the hermity minecrafts content yeah?

Any suggestions where to start with all that? Because that is a cultural phenomena that just passed right by me. I know it exists, theoretically, and that's it.

Listen, it almost passed right by me, too, except that 2 years ago (almost to date) a friend posted about wild shit going down in the s8 finale and that intrigued me, lonely while my wife was out of town spending xmas with her family, enough to check it out.

SO. As a relative newbie, my best suggestion is honestly what got me into it.

Grian's Season 8 playlist.

Technically speaking I watched Pearlescentmoon's season 8 first, discovered Grian via her videos, since they based near each other, discovered a series Grian started called 3rd Life around the same time, binged both, and was eternally hooked. But you can shortcut to Grian directly if you want.

I do recommend season 8 to start, because while it was a bit unique as far as hermitcraft seasons go, it was also extremely short, which means it's a good starting place for getting to know the server and the hermits and figuring out who you most enjoy. Plus season 8 was the first one they had proximity voice chat in-game, rather than having to coordinate into a discord call if they wanted to speak, and that impacted the interactions between the hermits in a huge (and positive) way.

Really anyone from s8 is a good choice. Pick one, start watching, see who they interact with that interest you, go watch them, rinse repeat ad nauseam.

The nice thing is that starting in s8 (or any season) does not hinder you in any way. You do not need to watch every season. I would wager a lot of folks haven't watched the earliest seasons. Each season is just "fresh start on a new minecraft seed", and what continuity there is generally is explained, because they know they pick up new viewers all the time.

If you've got any more specific questions, feel free to ask, I'll answer to the best of my ability! :)

[batfsm]

Speaking as someone who likes both Talia and Selina -

Your post about Selina is, frankly, a pile of bullshit, and I'd be fine with that (I've got no problem with someone not liking a character I do like), except you put it in the Selina Kyle tag. Someone could just as easily make a similar bad argument tearing down Talia, and I'm guessing you wouldn't be happy about seeing that in her tag. People don't repeat the "don't tag your hate" line as often these days but it's still general courtesy for a reason.

Also, that anon had a point, despite you ridiculing them for it. When you say that a female character who goes back to the earliest days of the franchise and has a rich and complex history "only exists to provide a love interest" and is "basically just a fuckbuddy"... well, you might not actually be a misogynist but you sure sound like one. The only difference between your post and something from an early 2000s dudebro forum thread is the absence of the word "whore". And despite you saying afterwards that "Bruce is a fuckbuddy too!" you never reduced him to just that, nor did you say Bruce is a meaningless and unimportant character because he's "just a fuckbuddy."

(Also, a similar argument could be made in regards to Talia. She was literally created to be a love interest for Bruce, and I have seen people reduce her - incorrectly - to "just Batman's babymama". It's a shit argument, but your reducing Selina to "just a fuckbuddy" is pretty much on the same level.)

I'm not trying to change your mind about Selina - if you don't like her, then that's your call - but I am trying to point out how you were being kind of an asshole.

I just saw this so I apologize for the lateness.

What's wrong with putting it in the damn tag? I'll go back and put anti Selina in it if it annoys you that much but I tag everything or at least try to. (I don't think I need to.)

If someone made an argument on Talia, which they have, I either read it and think about it or I scroll on past. Or I do both, read and scroll by. It's not that hard.

Christ, so because I made an opinion, and called her a fuck buddy I'm still a misogynistic? For Ra's sake! I never reduced Selina to that only.

I literally said this:

is that if you consider Selina a member of the family for basically being a ‘fuck buddy’, which I have read comics and yes, I’m not up to date but still, she is basically there to annoy Bruce and give him a partner other than his kids (from what I have read) and give him a love life, which he doesn’t need one,

Which I am not up to date with the comics but she was there basically to annoy Bruce and give him a love interest. Another one.

Selina's around to give Bruce a love interest, which he doesn't need. I've said it before and I'll say it again, they are over done.

I like Selina. I don't like her and Bruce together. Like Dick/Babs. I like those two by themselves but not together anymore.

Give me the characters by themselves and I'll be happy to read about them. Don't make try to just make them reduced to being 'fuckbuddies' to each other. It turns people off.

I don't think I was being an asshole by stating my opinion but I guess people are to easily hurt these days.

[popculturebuffet]

Pride Month Triple Feature Finale: Rocko’s Modern Life: Static Cling (Commission for Weird Kev 27)

Well this last installment is a bit late, but any month can be pride month if you belivie in yourself, so we end this pride month trilogy with Rocko’s Modern Life Static Cling, something i’ve been wanting to cover for years, but usually something came up or I realized I forgot to include it by the time the schedule was already full up. But with violence, legeslation, and outright bigotry towards Trans Persons only escalating, it felt like the right time.

For those not as familiar with Rocko, quick refresher: Rocko’s Modern Life was one of the earliest Nicktoons, created by Joe Murray and being a hit not just with the networks target demo, but adults who related to the series, a 20 something hang out sitcom but with all the lunacy animation allows. Our Rocko, his doofy friend Heffer and nerdy best friend Philbert dealt with nipples of the future, death, time travel with the elderly, elves, and recyling. The show was very of it’s time but also timeless as MANY of the fairly adult subjects it tackled in it’s unique goofy way still resonate: the show tackled topics like your parents not approving of a mixed marriage, the struggles immigrants face, homosexuality (via clowns), a sexually unsatisfying marriage leading to a wondering eye (done ENTIRELY straight to the point the episode was banned), finding out your adopted, bosses treating their workers like a commodity instead of a person, megacorporations running our lives, credit card debt, and even sex work

It’s thanks to Rocko we have classics like Regular Show, it’s successor Close Enough and Tuca and Bertie. The kind of show that uses wacky humor while still showing some very real shit we have to deal with. 

So in hindsight. .it’s not really a stretch that with changing times, rocko would go from having to use clowns to cover queerness to doing a full coming out episode in it’s revivial special, a pogniant well done story that deeply reconteculaizes a beloved character

Pig you’ve been out since 1996. 

So let’s look at this touching tale and all the other neat stuff just in time for the show’s 30th anniversary shall we?

Static cling follows our boy, his bulbous buddy and his somethign else rhyming with b , picking up where we left off.. and the original finale to the series had our heroes shot up into space, returning as the elderly. The last part is stricken from the record Roseanne style, and instead our heroes have largely settled in: Filburt misses his wife tails, he misses her a lot, but otherwise our heroes are doing fine on fatheads reruns... till Filburt notices the remote has been jammed up Heffer’s butt for the past decade, they fight as usual and Rocko has to scream at them to “PUSH THE BUTTON”. TV’s Frank would not abide. 

SO with that our heroes return to earth. There’s also a nice small joke in that... most people really aren’t phased our heroes were gone 20 years: while we sadly dont’ get a scene with Heffer’s family , easily one of my faviorite parts of the series with Rocko’s dinner visit being one of my faviorite episodes, we do get to see his beaver hating grandpa, with all his innuendo glory, the only change being

And Filburt naturally easily reunited with Hutch because their perfect and we need that. It’s like our heroes were never gone for the most part.  The real exception is ROcko.. and i’ts easy to why: Filburt had a wife and four adoring children eager to finally get to know their dad. Heffer’s family is implictly there and his grandpa is still around only now he can posses lawn gnomes. Nothing’s really changed for either in a way that harms them. Filburt missed most of his kids’ lives, but they seem to have grown up fine.  In contrast when you think about it.. no one was really waiting for Rocko. He hit it off with Shiela well, but that was one episode towards the end. I mean he could look her up on face-o-rama, or something, so ti’s not lost, but when you think about the series with his family in australia.. all Rocko had were his friends, mrs. bighead (who warmly welcomes the guy back and gives him some needed support), and Spunky. Rocko really has nothign to come back to: his job is gone and while his friends adapt to the 2010′s really well... it’s all too much. it also makes sense: Heffer always went with the flow and while Filburt seems a bit too accepting on paper, he’ sa giant nerd in a world where he can livesteream being nauseous and blather about his opinons for an adoring public. I mean I woudnln’t of had the tools to do this when the show aired. I was two and the internet wasn’t easy to come by. Six maybe. 

While the montage of various “new” things was.. dated even by when it came out and is kinda just there outside of Schlammo, the unhealty energy drink , it hammers home that while his friends have accepted the present.. Rocko is lost in it. He was never one to easily accept new trends in the show itself, usually being pulled into things like health clubs or credit cards by Heffer, so it’s entirley in character that being stuck in a world 20 years later with nothing to really hold him there shatters his normal optimisim. I’ts pretty heartining to see rocko shattered a bit when bev finds him. It makes her trying to support him and help him heartwarming.. but it can’t really fix the problem of feeling like the world’s passed you by. It was striking to realize how deep Rocko’s story comes off, a story about nostalgia and how it can help us when we feel lost.. but how we can cling to it as our only salvation. I’ll admit to having dived into my various coping mechanisms, comics, games, tv, youtube, to escape... and to have a minor panic attack if one’s missing, so I may just relate to rocko a bit.. but it still works.  It also kicks off the plot as the fatheads is gone, and Rocko badly needs it. HIs cries for it fall on deaf ears for mr bighead though, who just oopsied at work.. and now his world is collapsing for real, with his job gone and his house soon to be gone. “A tv show won’t solve your problems rocko”. It’s a simple statment.. but one that’s true. TV can offer an escape.. but it’s not going to fix what’s wrong with yoru life. It’s the thesis statment of this special.  Granted it can at least save ed’s job and house and conglomo as the special revenue would do it. It’s heavily spoofing how much companjies rely on these revivials and nostalgia pops, with the series lovingly mocking how much money fans think a rocko special would bring nick.. and then accidnetly being accurate as while Static Cling didn’t bring in millions upon millions of dollars, it was still a success all the same. 

The problem is the head of congolmo wants the chameleon twins to make it cheap with CG. I mean grante dth eproblem is the fatheads also you know.. ende din the run of the show, but honeslty i’m willing to ignore that for what a good story it is and it could easily be said Rachel just had to go back and make more to pay the bills or something. This was also built both off the actual rumors, that later came true of a CG Rugrats reboot, which honestly dosen’t LOOK bad.  So with that our heroes decide to search for the series creator, “Ralph” Bighead, who disappeared during the time skip, as all the money, all the success didn’t make them happy. We get some fun gags including a faviorite of mine “Culturally ambgious pillows”, as our heroes tour the world to find the creator.  And thus about halfway into the special they find them int he desert.. and find out why no one had seen them. See while they last saw them as “Ralph”.... our heroes instead find RACHEL Bighead. 

And honestly ti’s excellently done for the most part. Before we get to all the good let’s get the elephant out of the room: Joe Murray should not have continued playing rachel. Joe.. is a cis man. A cis man should nto play a trans woman. I can however accept this wasn’t done with any malcious intent, and was likelky done to hide that Rachel was trans now, as the special has it as a twist, wtih Rachel having a hat on and only revealing their trans by steping out of her fatheads foodtruck. Having a new VA might give that away. I still wish they’d swapped them but I get Joe meant well.  I mostly get that.. because everything ELSE is done well. When you look back on who rachel was.. they were miserable. They had all the money in the world, but could never find creative fufillment with the fatheads, to thepoint they tried sabotaging a followup with wacky delli. I mean we got the cheese, the best character in the show, but Rachel never found fufillment. It was only by realizing who they always were and making their body into what they truly always wanted that Rachel is happy. Said happiness.. allows her the reconciatlion with her creatoion she never got in the original show, selling fatheads freezie pops. She found a new art, the life she alwasy wanted she’s content. She even refuses to do the special, and rightfully so: while the creator SHOUDL revivie a work if possible, if they don’t want to.. they shoudlnt’ be forced to. Rachel only agrees because her parents are in danger.  I also love the acceptance rachel gets: the boys all think it’s neat and instantly accept it, as you should. The reveal itself is simply done: Rachel steps out, says “I’m rachel now”.. and the boys all think it’s neat and accept it, attaching their drone to the ice cream truck and flying off. Bev also fully accepts it, happy their daughter’s happy and even finding her some cute shoes. It makes sense for all involved: while all from the 90′s, Rocko’s group has always been an accepting bunch for the most part, while Bev was always the parent that accepted their kid more.  It’s harder for Ed.. but it’s a well done harder. He’s bigoted, and potrayed as stupidly as that sounds: he rejects the idea of the special simply because he rejects the idea he has no son but a daughter. I also like the stealth pun there: he once claimed he had no son when he disowned rachel.. and it turns out he never did. Everyone around him rightfully sees this as stupid, and it’s portrayed as such, but what i Like is that they play this realistically. Instead of Ed throwing out slurs or throwing a tantrum, which sadly could very well happen, he just disowns his child, again, and storms off. He can’t accept a trans daughter because to him it’s a change. To Rachel.. it’ sbeing who she was always meant to be. Rachel ends up still making the special, remembering her past, including biting ed’s eye as a baby.. and using that. And while Ed has to be dragged to the premiere, as many a person has to be dragged into acceptaince... it’s said work that helps Ed see what a fool he’s been. Rachel reworks the fatheads.. but now includes a baby based on themselves. It adds great new jokes to the bit.. but it’s the last one, a reinactment of her “damaging her fathers retina”.. that makes Ed realize what he shoudl have all along: this is his child and who they always were. Being a woman not only allowed them to be happy.. but it dosen’t change who they are.. because this is who they ALWAYS were. And what helps is that... Rachel didn’t NEED ed’s acceptance. Their disapointed, but when he wails no at it, she simply says yes. They do the short because, even if Ed dosen’t accept her, she wont’ leave her parents homeless and still loves them both. And it’s ED who has to come around and accept that he has a daughter, he always did.. and that’s wonderful.  We also get Rocko.. not accepting the change. A baby, how dare he.. but ed talks him down, getting to the point of the special in a truly lovely speech. 

“Rocko we can’t live in the past, we can be grateful for it, but life isn’t permenant, and if we don’t embrace what’s now, we miss out on a lot of the important stuff. “ I couldn’t of said it better myself and belivie me i’ve tried. And it’s a perfect message for this special.. and for Rachels’ story. embrace what you have, not what you thought you had. This special is phenominal, with tons of great gags, a truly amazing story at the core, and lots of great cameos in some lovely animation. Check it out wether your new to rocko or want to revisit an old friend. Thanks for reading and happy belated pride. 

[general-kalani]

Joseph's abilities (this is completely my own shit no one look at me LMFAO-) will add to this more in the future. Will also appreciate judgement on these because they're not 100% final

~`~

Pre-Far Cry 5 abilities: -> Speaking to the dead is one of the earliest known abilities Joseph has unknowingly used. Though mostly used for the recently departed for short moments in time. This was however 'beaten out' of him shortly after he talked about it.

~`~

Far Cry 5 abilities: -> Can see "auras" of people. Though they're only faint shapes, the intensity of them or colour can show what they are to him. A werewolf will have a bigger aura, a demon will have a red one, vampires have a really intense and dark aura.

-> Hearing the Voice means to some extent he can hear ghosts. Kinda fucked up when you think about it.

-> When someone is dealing with a headache or something mental that causes them pain, he can kiss their forehead and give them temporary relief for a few hours.

-> Though he gets his Visions from the Voice, it can't be denied how accurate and how detailed they are. Yes he uses them to further his cause but 90% of the time they're a warning (such as the off-handed line from Jacob saying "you did everything he said you would")

-> He can see when someone is hung up on trauma and he can place his hand on their chest (over their heart) to help them lighten the burden on their heart temporarily. Lasts an hour or two but if continuously done it can potentially help someone permanently.

-> Has to some extent shown he can heal wounds. Although the wounds heal on the person who received them, he takes on the wounds himself.

-> Telekinesis is one barely anyone will notice but has shown itself in the fact things will only move under intense emotion. He's yet to get a handle over this power.

-> Immunity to fall damage is the most bizarre ability of his that most would not expect yet has very little use in practical terms.

-> The ability to smite his enemies from a distance out of a mix of anger and frustration, it appears to come down as a very bright, yellow lightning strike. During this time his eyes appeared to glow a yellow-ish white. Some time afterwards if trying to interact with him and touch him, there will be a 'static shock' to whoever attempted it.

~`~

New Dawn abilities (This is thanks to the apple stuff lmfao): -> His "aura" reading gets such an upgrade to the point of actually making out everything in detail. Werewolves forms are completely shown to him, vampires still retain their dark aura however their physical form is shown to him. Demons can't hide behind their human disguise to him.

-> Inhuman strength (picking up his SON for example) which makes for a surprise since he's still thin as all hell.

-> His Visions are much more intense. What could last hours for him might just pass for a few minutes. Happens most during prayers. Uses this to try and avoid what happens to Ethan to little success.

-> Although it hasn't been truly seen yet, it's been rumoured he has been teleporting, appearing in places faster than should be possible. No one has proof of this happening however except the New Edeners spreading such rumours.

-> The healing of wounds no longer makes him take on the wounds from the victim, when he heals a wound it is completely healed with no negatives afterwards.

-> Telekinesis is far better under control to the point he can pull items or people to himself. Although it does become uncontrolled when under intense emotion as before.

-> Telepathy is a new ability for him that has yet to really make an impact, however he has been living in the mountains for a long, long time so bringing him back to civilisation of his people will perhaps prove detrimental more than helpful.

-> Projection is another new ability for him, being able to appear at distant locations while being in another, disabling the need to have Cain or anyone else to act for him. Though it takes a heavy mental toll and he can't keep it active for more than a few minutes straight at a time. He also appears to be able to handle and shoot weapons while projecting as well.

-> His talking to the dead ability resurfaces here, being able to not only talk to them no matter how long deceased they were but also visit where they are and hold a conversation for a while. But he's still getting used to it, and things can still go wrong.

-> An ability that hasn't been on the radar before until now has been one that prevents death. He can act dead, go down to a shot but he'll always come back up. Blood will, however, still stain him even if he's survived a gunshot or otherwise.

[ifonotlnow]

REVIEW THAT NOBODY CARES ABOUT: CLOWN CIRCUS EDITION

Error: 6/10

Love this song, I would say I dislike it more than some of the other songs on the album mainly due to a bias I have against instrumentals (This song is soo good, but I'm a sucker for vocals)

Lemon Demon: 7/10

This song bring s a fun energy, and I love Aaron's feature. This is a really good song, and my low ranking comes down to my shitty music taste, even for a lemon demon fan.

Ten Thousand Light Years Away: 9/10

HOLY SHIT I LOVE THIS SONG okay, this song is definitely one of my album favorites. I love the way that it builds up in the beginning (side note, I'm giggling to myself internally thinking of somebody who has never heard of lemon demon before reading this and deciding to listen to the song from my review, only to be hit by disappointment), I LOVE the elevator music-y instrumental, and (this applies to a lot of Neil's discography) I LOVE LOVE LOVE how he layers vocal harmonies in this song.

Don’t Be Like the Sun: 8/10

Another one of my favorites from the album, Don't Be Like the Sun is the earliest Lemon Demon song, released 1-21-03 (yes I used month first, screw you I do what I want on my Tumblr page). The song goes through many tonal shifts and, like many others in Neil's discography, has mostly nonsensical lyrics. Definitely not a song for everyone, but one of my personal highlights of the album.

Bowling Alley 5/10

This song is focused more on storytelling, starting off as a short instrumental (and you already know how I feel about those) then switching tones as Neil describes (not to the beat) a dream he had the other day. While I feel my last sentence may have come off as a bit hostile, I did not intend that. The song is great, it was just clearly not meant to be listened to the way one would listen to a regular song. While I see the vision, and I see why people may like it, it's not for me, hence the low rating.

Wrong: 8/10

honestly, I don't really have anything to write here. I could just describe the song to pad my review with filler (cough cough my "Don't Be Like the Sun" review cough cough) but I kinda don't wanna. I like it. Good song. 8/10

Hazel’s Modus Operandi: 8.5/10

I love this song. I feel like this song is the sort of song I picture when I think of this album. The lyrics, the overall sound, it's just very clown circus-y, y'know? It's a very chill song. I like the use of expectation subversion in the chorus. I also like how informal I can be when writing this (seriously? "It's a very chill song" pick up a goddamn thesaurus for once in your life) because nobody cares enough to read it (if you're reading this, you lost the game). Anyways, who am I to fret like this. Maybe a song review change will pull me out of this abyss (not so subtle Joe Hawley reference to veil the fact I don't know how to end this review) (also, this review sucks and is completely unreadable to anyone except for me) (also, seriously why are you reading this, this sucks)

Idiot Control Now: 7.5/10

Good cover of a very strange song from MST3K. And I can't think of anymore to say (seriously, I gotta quit it with the references)

Pepper and Salt: 8/10

I feel like in December of last year, I would've given it a 9, but some of the magic of the song has worn off of me. Nevertheless, I still quite enjoy this song. However, I feel like the shitty Jamaican accent that's so shitty I didn't even realize he was DOING AN ACCENT is unnecessary and completely unrelated to the song. Like seriously, why does a song about zombies need a shitty Jamaican accent in it?

Holy Bison Beaks!: 5/10

What I said about Bowling Alley extends here. The song was clearly not meant to be listened to as a regular song, but since I regularly listen to it that way I unfortunately cannot fully enjoy it as intended. I do really like that ironic little, self-referential, catchy freakin' hook though.

Somnolence: 7.5/10

mid. 4 sigmas/10 gyatts (I hate myself and every decision that has lead to me writing out that sentence)

Fire Motif: 8/10

This song radiates with 16 y/o Neil's kind of charming, kind of cringey, kind of both teenage edginess. I mean seriously, "smoke, burning, sparks and red fire?" "They’ll find you. They’ll catch you. They’ll burn you?" When the writing is bad by MY standards? you know it's bad. Despite this, I really like this song (though I still mildly cringe when he says "Love, pain, and such emotions are the coal")

Hyakugojyuuichi 2003 8/10

I feel like this is one of the most iconic songs in the album. A song released by Neil on the two year anniversary of the release of his animation "Hyakugojyuuichi!!!," the song Hyakugojyuuichi 2003 is a song Neil released with FOUR guest features (we'll get into those later) and SO MANY references in it. It's a very catchy song and I don't think Nintendo will ever let Neil upload it to streaming/sell it because of the insane amount of samples it uses from the Pokemon song "Hyakugojyuuichi" (seriously listen to the instrumental, so many samples). It features Aaron Ackerson, Jackson Taylor Wetherbee (a.k.a. Zander), Mark Hughes (a.k.a. Toxic) and Dave Kelly (a.k.a. Shmorky Kay), two of which have (in my opinion) two of THE WORST aging lemon demon verses ever. Shmorky's verse doesn't;t contain anything of note IN THE VERSE, so why would there be multiple YouTube uploads of the song with JUST their verse cut out? Well, a quick YouTube search of "Shmorky" will reveal multiple video essays regarding this animator and likely ex-friend of Neil's grooming allegations, along with an audio clip of him withholding SCHIZOPRHRENIA MEDICATIONS FROM HIS PARTNER (Jesus Christ that is a horrible thing to do). so yeah one could say that the verse aged horribly. Also toxic's verse is just gibberish with a vaguely stereotypical Japanese-ish accent. It's actualy insane to listen to, but it was 2003, what're ya gonna do. also sorry I kind of used this spot to dump all of my pent-up thoughts and opinions in this review space, but I guess that was the whole point of making a review in the first place.

Elsewhere 6/10

Yeah I kinda just don't like it there's nothing to say. sorry I'm kinda worn out from writing my hyakugojyuuichi review to write anything here. also I don't care enough about this song. I was going to apoloise again but I'm not sorry. this song is totally mid. 2 livvy dunnes/3 baby gronks

TOTAL ALBUM RATING: 7.5/10

FAVORITE AND LEAST FAVORITE SONGS

Ten Thousand Light Years Away, Holy Bison Beaks!/Bowling Alley

[schismusic]

THE DISCOGRAPHY PRINCIPLE, Episode 1: Autechre - or, Into Battle with the Art of Noise

The discography principle may be defined as an objective way to determine whether or not you're worthy of calling a band or artist "your favorite" or "one of your favorites". A possible enunciation of it goes as follows:

"Let u ≝ some asshole, B ≝ {b|b is a band}, n ≝ #({x|x is a record by b}); let p = #({y|y is a record by b in u's possession}) = p1 + p2 wherein p1 ≝ number of physical records by b you own in any format and p2 ≝ number of records by b you have downloaded. If p ≥ n ∨ p2 = n (for n → +∞), then ∃b∈B such that b is one of u's favorite bands."

When u = me, this subset of B (which we might call Bf) is comprised of six bands, off the top of my head: Autechre, Godflesh, Shellac, Kraftwerk, Fugazi and Coil, listed in no particular order.

If you want to read the prologue to this series, go here. Otherwise, let's get going.

The concept of usefulness in the context of art criticism is very slippery and, one could argue, absolutely toxic and painful to the development of artistic expressions of all kinds. I have, in the past, been one of the leading proponents of it, but you have to understand: I routinely dealt with people who would add Arctic Monkeys and late-era Caparezza to their end-of-year lists. Drastic measures were in order, I'm sure you guys get it. In virtually all other instances, defining a record "useless" falls into one of the earliest trappings of retrograde art criticism, which is the supposed non-functionality of bad art, or more punctually the quality of non-functionality as inherently bad - wherein I am rather ready to assure you all that most of my favourite records of the past six or seven years fall into the category of absolutely unapproachable crocks of shit OR are records absolutely no one felt the need for except me (and even then, sometimes I didn't even know I'd love them, see Yellow Eyes' recent neofolk foray Master's Murmur).

A similar argument could be made for the concept of incomprehensibility. There are records that are just cryptic for the hell of it - and it would be unfair to label power electronics as such, in that power electronics is usually very direct with what it is about and how it takes it across, but early Brandt Brauer Frick records might very easily fit the bill: who, really, feels the need for live-played techno with classically trained interpreters except for people who like to groove but also have to pretend they know their shit about music and don't want any of that fake computer shit? Or even, why would anyone legitimately give a shit about a Stephen O'Malley record without guitars? - but Autechre I think are simply a different beast. Wherein the vulgata concerning their production essentially revolves around the idea that their first three are the best, then it's all noises and "self-serving experimentation", whatever the fuck that means, and for as many autism jokes people like to make about their music because they simply don't want to even try to give their music a fair chance to stand on its own and just pretend like "wow these guys sure are making computer farts haha", one of the best conversations about music I've had in a while revolves around something that binds Autechre and another dearly-beloved of all obnoxious music people, and later also featured in this series: Coil. And I'm not talking about the (very openly stated) relationship of most-likely-mutual influence between the two groups, but it does stem from that, or more specifically from the aborted collaborative record they toyed with in the early 2000s. This aforementioned collaborative record (which, in the early 2000s, would have probably sold like pre-sliced and pre-Nutella-coated bread to the admittedly very specific audiences the two projects had, regardless of its actual outcome) was shelved, and I quote verbatim, for "not being good enough", which is simply something that you do not do in electronic music unless you are really, really good at what you do - the best at what you do, even. Which would explain why no one ever shuts the fuck up in that particular world and everyone has like a full record and three splits/EPs out every year.

Autechre is something you have to want to waste a lot of time (and money, if you're an obsessive like me) into. There's a number of very cute cheat codes to getting Autechre but the gist of it is that just about nobody I know actually followed the advice literally everyone hands out - i.e. to start with Incunabula. I know I absolutely didn't. The first Autechre record I listened to was Confield, which I later purchased at a certain particularly well-known record shop in my city: my first thought was I really didn't know what to make of it. In retrospect, it's no surprise: literally any other Autechre record would have been better. There are more accessible ones and more inaccessible ones, but either of these options probably would have given me a different shock that would probably have hit me harder. Had I picked up a record like Amber, or Tri Repetae, I probably would have been like "damn this is very '90s but at the same time it still sounds very futuristic in terms of approach and arrangement choices, there's like a billion albums-of-the-month on Pitchfork that sound exactly like any one of these tracks but stretched to forty minutes to one hour" and maybe give it another listen, and then two, and then before I know it Rsdio becomes my most played track of the year (unfortunately, as you might have guessed, this isn't autobiographical, but that's because I ultimately got Tri Repetae on vinyl and mostly play it from there - it's "incomplete without surface noise", after all). If I had picked elseq, or - God forbid - the NTS Sessions, which at that point had been out for like a year or something, you know for a fact I would have tried to get absolutely fucked up by listening to the full four-hour thing while doing something really stupid, like taking a walk around in a blizzard or while in sleep deprivation or while studying linear algebra hoping that my brain would increase in mass all of a sudden. I would not have gotten it, obviously, because I was and to a massive extent still am an idiot who got lucky. Anyway, the point is that Confield felt and in part still feels to me like it's unexpressed potential, but not in the way a record like Radioactivity by Kraftwerk is: Confield looks at you, the listener, and goes "there's a whole other world where we already are. Too bad you can't see any of this shit, because we most definitely do!". Its second half gets noticeably more focused if you listen to the whole thing in sequence, though.

My second attempt was with Oversteps, bought on the same day as Confield, and again - at that point I was already kind of expecting Autechre to just fucking smoke me right then and there. Of course it did not happen, because Oversteps is a fundamentally easier record to approach than Confield is - and in buying it, I also missed the chance to buy Exai, which promptly disappeared from the record shop the very second I managed to go back there, and which would have probably gotten me in a whole ass elseq loop, but let's not dwell on the past, what the fuck did I know then? It's not like anyone has the idea to start with a two-hour-and-a-half impenetrable wall of glitching after all. Whatever. Oversteps is pretty cool though, because it gave me a pretty neat access into a number of other Autechre factory-seals like their stark sense of melody and a style of compositionl development recalling more the idea of a place than it would an actual track (and not even in the Ambient 4: On Land way, where it's "music that describes environments" inspired by the anything-goes bombastic mnemonic approach of Federico Fellini's Amarcord, but rather in its own way of "music that is the environment it describes": spatially organized arrangements, something meant for you to explore, and as such something that you need to spend time in, perhaps repeatedly). Obviously articulating this train of thought was absolutely out of the question and I therefore kept saying "damn, I need to get to this record and listen to it in full", which I later found out doesn't fly more often than not. Autechre is something you want to get back to and waste a shit ton of time on, every track approached like a little world or some sort of escape room even, where all the clues are there and everything you need to do is look (listen) more intently than you did before. I like to think of Autechre as a challenge and I'm assuming that Sean Booth and Rob Brown kinda see it like that too, but not as a challenge to the listener as much as they do it to challenge themselves.

There are absolutely going to be Autechre records you like more than others, some are not gonna speak to you at all, some might be more approachable or just more stylistically in line with what you do (and the best part is that you're gonna find it changes from person to person), but the best part is that there is never an Autechre record that feels thrown out for a quick buck or rushed or forced to develop old ideas and intuitions - for better or for worse, that is. At the same time there definitely is a form of continuity that makes it especially rewarding to listen to Autechre sequentially, the way some people like to watch and rank a director's filmography.

After the pandemic ended, and as people were beginning to go out again albeit maybe wearing masks and gloves, I dropped out of Mathematics and started watching a ton of movies. I fell in love with Nicolas Winding Refn, a director that makes it really easy to put on a movie and let it slide over your skin bathing you in thrills and aesthetics, but is pretentious enough to make that stuff at least try to have something to say (some people argue that it's detrimental to Refn's work, and to an extent I agree; I, for one, simply can't help but appreciate a man who very gleefully declares that the female experience is a mystery to him and at the same time that there's a sixteen-year-old girl within him and that he plays dolls with his daughters and that he never had a girlfriend until he met his current wife Lia Corfixen. The Neon Demon feels like it'd be just one step away from being a male-gaze-glorifying flick if it wasn't for its inherent absurdity and absolute lack of understanding of human relationships that makes it that bit less relatable and more forcefully estranging). Anyway as I was fixating on Refn's movies and downloaded all of them to watch and rewatch them, I also found myself back onto Autechre and decided to take a step back. This time I picked Amber - Incunabula being described as their masterpiece still sort of intimidated me. In retrospect, if I had heard Incunabula without a clear picture of what Autechre would evolve into, I'd have had a hearty laugh and thought something like "man, this aged horribly". Amber has a bit of an edge to it, despite what Booth & Brown say about it, and the elements left over from Incunabula are turned into a less rigid, more impalpable version of themselves that isn't afraid to, for instance, remove all drums and toy with the listener's sense of rhythm in a way something like Kalpol Introl never really did (see: Nine) or face a horrifying creeping darkness that Incunabula's more clearly urban/cyberpunk sensitivities more swiftly dealt with, for instance on tracks like Teartear.

Not one to be easily discouraged (at least when I feel like it), at the first opportunity I decided to buy a record I didn't already know: the choice fell on Tri Repetae, in that it was the next step in the Autechre canon (EPs notwithstanding) and I knew it'd be a step closer to Confield. I wanted to see what the story went like, on its own terms, because the key to this whole ordeal was that I needed to let the record do the talking before I had an opinion on it. And Tri Repetae really did talk to me, because it was exactly what I expected: it had the more discernible elements of early Autechre but also, again, an edge. It's that edge for me: that's the point of interest I end up into, the sort of liminal in-fieri elements that all Autechre releases imply to an extent, and the fact that something as fundamentally ungraspable as C/Pach or Rsdio feeling like it got back home after a whole sleepless night out walking in the cold could coexist with a veritable banger like Eutow (still the one track from Tri Repetae that elicits the most powerful emotional/elated reactions from me) simply blew my mind. Dancing to Eutow in my room and immediately finding myself bobbing my head to, of course, C/Pach and then Gnit led to the next realization in a long series: after everything that's been said about them, the being a four-dimensional object, the being famously impenetrable to all but the most dedicated nerds, the truth about Autechre is that they are a band about rhythm.

I don't exactly expect anyone to be surprised by this, really, but the conscious realization that what I had read on Wikipedia in passing (that Sean and Rob actually met up in the '80s while in the tagging/hip-hop/electro scene in London) actually had bearing on the duo's production was the key to unlocking the rest of their music. Every single thing Autechre have ever done has a form of pulse in it and it takes movement for it to be fully tapped into. Some hacks have recommended listening to Autechre on headphones (deep cuts on YouTube, I see you!) but as for me, I recommend speakers, possibly big, possibly hi-fi, possibly equalized for techno/dance music, and I recommend listening to them with a lot of free space around you. The inherent exploration of space that dancing entails very easily translates into an exploration of the underlying structures in Autechre's (whatchamacallit) songwriting, and from there the rest follows. Even Incunabula, which I finally tackled in summer 2023 and appreciated for what it is: provided you can deal with outdated sound palettes, an excellent record that stands as a true high mark in the exploration of analog instrumentation possibilities, a true forward-looking and forward-pushing debut outing on whose shoulders all future Autechre releases stand, even the most radical.

But Autechre could never stand still and simply replicate Incunabula all over n billion times; that's simply not the cloth they're cut from, and if that was the case I'd be very hard-pressed to think they'd feel as relevant as they do with every subsequent release. That they could drop, in sequence, Exai, the whole five records of elseq and the NTS Sessions boxset and still elicit the electrified reactions they did, both positive and negative.

One of the first serious conversations about music that I had with my old band's bassist was about electronic music, which was actually somewhat foundational to my appreciation of this particular art form (I was a die-hard Daft Punk/Justice guy, Waters of Nazareth and Genesis were to me what Metallica or System of a Down to a number of other people I know: a show of force that made me conscious of the physical impact of sound on a human's body, not just pleasant vibrations to the ears). She told me - and I'm willing to bet that was an old idea that she has since discarded - that she really didn't feel like electronic music was alive, and with music being "life" to her that was a true oxymoron that rendered her incapable of objectively judging electronica. At the time I would have never showed her Autechre, if anything because I did not know them if not by name, but my current understanding of them makes them the most serious counterargument to that affirmation. Autechre's music doesn't try to measure up to the feel of live band jamming because it doesn't need to, despite it often being (according to Booth and Brown) the result of lengthy, additive improvisations that the duo trade back and forth. It simply takes a step sideways, making all analysis on those terms essentially unserviceable and useless. And if it wasn't as massively pretentious as it is, this shit simply wouldn't fly: any tension to a conventionally-imaginable sense of humanity would make it clear that the duo aren't into it really, and ironically it ends up feeling less believable; it starts breathing weird, it turns into a captatio benevolentiae to the listener. And Autechre is meant to challenge us, or rather it's meant to challenge me, and Sean Booth and Rob Brown.

Ironically enough, Autechre's records feel more and more rewarding the more you get familiar with them, and therefore it turns into its own peculiar brand of process music, so to speak. And it's a hell of a process, granted, but it definitely has something to say to you as a listener, if you're willing to give it a shot. Autechre's music is incomprehensible and useless, if you don't know what to make of it, but the only way to know what to make of it is engage in it and make up your own mind about it.

[callmeghoulshit]

For the 101 questions!

It’s so many imsorryimsorryimsorry but ily

4, 10, 13, 23, 31, 33, 44, 75, 88, 97

SHAKEY I'M SO SORRY IT TOOK FOREVER TO ANSWERRRRRR.

Made the mistake of opening it during work so I lost the notification and forgot :(

Everything under the cut cuz this was an essay.

ANYWAYS:

4. What's the one thing you feel like everyone knows how to do except you?

Oho. Literally everything. Life as a whole. Everyone makes everything look so damn easy and it leaves me wondering what went wrong with me (I know damn well what's wrong with me lmao but I don't wanna change it)

Oh but to be specific it's hard to explain so I hope I make sense but appearances. I know even the prettiest people have their insecurities but it seems like everyone else knows what to do with themselves. Whether it be hair, clothes, makeup. I have to ask my bestie all the time because it's the one thing I don't get is how people are like "imma do this! I think it'll look cool!" Like how are you SURE? How do you just know what looks good in you and what doesn't?

It took me five years to nail my eyeliner. Fucking eyeliner. And it'll probably take me another five to figure out if I can even wear eyeshadow.

10. What's your boring hobby (that you still enjoy anyway)?

This is another hard one cuz I do quite a bit of hobby hopping now. In the span of a year I went from jewellery making, cross stitch, painting, clothes making, and clay. I didn't have any hobbies prior to that, let alone "boring" ones so I don't really have an answer haha.

13. Tell a secret.

See my initial answer was to say my maladaptive daydreaming, except I slapped that in my intro post haha. And anything else that comes to mind is actually unwarranted trauma dumping I think. So we're gonna stick with the MADD but make it dramatic:

I've had seven (there's way more but they're the core ones) imaginary friends since I was 14. I'm currently twenty, and hoping they don't go away, there have been a couple times I've "lost" my ability to daydream and I felt so broken because they stem from a time I was so lonely I only had myself and I love them so dearly. So if you ever see me talking about my OCs (original characters), I mean them. I'm so unbelievably attached and can talk about them forever haha. Maybe if I see an ask game about OCs I'll answer about them hehe.

23. Do you believe in an afterlife?

Nope. No belief in any kind of higher power. My only fear is that you're still somehow conscious after death, just experiencing nothingness. It's mainly because I can't imagine everything just switching off.

31. What are you looking forward to right now?

Hmm maybe getting round to my project where I wanted to make a dress. Maybe it's my delusions of grandeur because I keep hoping it'll turn out perfect haha.

Being able to see my best friend for a proper hangout again too. I miss being able to see her whenever we wanted to <3

33. What's your favorite color in context?

Red. I just really like red. When I used to get up really early and the sun was rising it'd look so pretty and red and pink.

44. What's the earliest dream you can remember having?

I can't remember anything mate haha. It would have to be a weird lil nightmare I had three years ago I think, enjoy

75. What's that movie you know is bad but enjoy anyways?

Fast and Furious franchise. Admittedly I need to catch up with a few movies. And I know it's far fetched and everything BUT I DONT CARE. DAYDREAM INSPO. ITS FUN. GIMME MY STUPID UNREALISTIC DRIVING MOVIE.

88. What kinds of things confuse you?

Fucking LIFE. Money. Bills. My mum's council tax makes me wanna rip my hair out. I wanna figure out if I can live independently BUT I DONT KNOW HOW MUCH BILLS Are this is so fucking stressful.

Oh and attraction lmao I don't get that shit. I have an ace flagged pinned to my wall but it feels like a lie cuz I'd feel so bad if I realise down the line I'm not ace. Seriously what the fuck is romantic attraction. Tf is sexual attraction. The fuck is arousal. Anyways moving swiftly on

97. What's your favorite word?

Swear words. I can't think right now. Maybe shit, fuck, bitch, cunt or dickhead.

[ddrqoyote]

people keep saying gear 5 is bad cause it turns luffy from a regular guy who made it this far with hard work into another chosen one. ignoring that that was never really true (related to garp and dragon, chosen by shanks and trained by rayleigh, has the will of D, etc), it makes me think of one of the biggest tensions in shonen.

there isn't really a thesis to what you're gonna read, i'm just rambling on something i think about a lot lately.

people want a self-made man for the lead that anyone could see themselves becoming. people also want a world-beater who can stop established, global evils with nothing but a small group of friends, and it needs to happen relatively quickly cause no one but hindu monks wants a story 5000 chapters long. and honestly, it doesn't feel real to have both. anyone who's been around the block a couple times knows that's not how the world works. it's not that easy to dismantle, no one can just stomp through the world like godzilla and knock all the bad stuff down. even kings and dictators can't do that.

i think most older shonen fans know all that, we're not dumb, we just don't like it.

there's this book of wwii superhero comics called "the great comic book heroes". the writer, jules feiffer, grew up on them in the 30s and worked on them* during the 40s and 50s. he talks a lot in the book about how he saw the earliest superheroes growing up.

*assistant to eisner on the original spirit run and wrote the last couple years. though he's probably better-known as a pulitzer-winning cartoonist, author and playwright. also illustrated the phantom tollbooth.

"The problem in pre-super days was that, with few exceptions, heroes were not very interesting. And, by any realistic appraisal, certainly no match for the villains who were bigger, stronger, smarter (as who wasn’t?), and even worse, were notorious scene stealers... Villains, whatever fate befell them in the obligatory last panel, were infinitely better equipped than those silly, hapless heroes. Not only comics, but life taught us that. Those of us raised in ghetto neighborhoods were being asked to believe that crime didn’t pay? Tell that to the butcher! Nice guys finished last; landlords, first. Villains by their simple appointment to the role were miles ahead. It was not to be believed that any ordinary human could combat them. More was required. Someone with a call. When at last appeared, he brought with him the deep satisfaction of all underground truths: our reaction was less “How original!” than “But, of course! The advent of the super-hero was a bizarre comeuppance for the American dream. Horatio Alger could no longer make it on his own. He needed “Shazam!” Here was fantasy with a cynically realistic base: once the odds were appraised honestly it was apparent you had to be super to get on in this world."

the rest of the essay is here if you want to read something about superheroes that isn't "they're the modern mythology (for the 1% of people who read comics)!" or "superheroes are shit even though i make a living writing them, because i'm british!"

but basically a big reason these superpowered characters exist is because real people CAN'T do the things they do. we can learn from them, we can strive to have as much integrity as them, but we can't enforce decency on the world or save everyone from the bullshit that happens to them, even the people we care about (i've tried saving people, believe me, it doesn't work).

i'm not trying to crap on shonen or superheroes, i'm just less and less sure what to do with them these days cause they're a huge part of my life and now they feel less real than when i was younger. i know they don't have to reflect reality for me to enjoy them and it's pretty silly to expect that, but... i don't know. sometimes i feel like i've totally run away from reality and i don't like that about myself. it feels like my life's empty sometimes. and i don't like how socially acceptable that's become either. every time i hear people talk about irl "character development" or "i'm in my [x] arc" or something similar, or some youtuber says "here are the characters in this story [that really happened]", i don't like it. call me a boomer but it worries me.

[unhingedselfships]

LINK TO GAME

🌍Adventurecore🌎 ~ If you could take your F/O anywhere in real life, where would you take them?

Literally anywhere. I would go anywhere with this man, as long as I could be with him.

🛍️Barbiecore🛍️ ~ Show us your favorite outfit that your F/O has worn!

I have posts about this already lol.

🖕Bastardcore🖕 ~ Are there any “flaws” of your F/O that you find endearing?

Uh. I really shouldn’t like that he’s a man-child, highly manipulative, serial killer with mommy(?) issues, but here we are.

🌳Cabincore🌳 ~ You and your F/O are enjoying a weekend in nature. How do you spend it?

Attempting to camp! Then giving up, renting a cabin, and enjoying nice hikes that end with us in a very pleasant actual bed.

📖Dazecore📖 ~ What would you say is your F/O’s biggest passion (outside of you, of course 🥰)?

Murder? I’m kidding. Guns, knives, cooking. Probably.

😱Expressionism😱 ~ Describe to us exactly how your F/O makes you feel! Or, for a twist, describe how you make your F/O feel! Or do both!

Oh lort its a lot. Tired, frustrated, annoyed, happy, content, safe, comfortable, satisfied. He exhausts me but I wouldn’t trade him for anything.

I couldn’t really speak for Kenshi, except I know he needs me too, and that he is… a bit conflicted, about the nature of our relationship. But then, feelings in general confuse him so.

🖤Femme Fatale🖤 ~ What, in your opinion, is your F/O’s greatest achievement?

Look at all that emotional and character growth!

🔍Film Noir🔍 ~ Are there any questions about your F/O that you’d like to see their source answer?

So many. I’m working on wearing the creator down!

🪨Groundcore🪨 ~ What would your F/O do if you became a worm?

Bruh idefk. Let me ask.

Apparently, per Word of Creator, in character, he would step on me and crush me. Now we know how he really feels lmfao.

📝Hipness Purgatory📝 ~ If your F/O drew you, how would it turn out?

… I actually know nothing of the man’s art skills. I’ll need to investigate. Will report back.

Ok so update! He has no art skills but he does have steady hands. So it would be a vaguely Kimi-ish human shape with a "sorry" speech bubble because she apologizes all the time.

💾Internet Academia💾 ~ How did you discover your F/O or their source?

I stopped being intimidated by Majimemegoro and interacted and then BAM. Shit happened.

🚎Joyride🚎 ~ How would a road trip with your F/O, friends/associates, and you go?

Depends on which friends/associates. But probably not too terribly? Probably? Kenshi loves to drive, Kimi loves to ride. They'll trade aux/Bluetooth control. Lots of pee breaks for Kimi that he'll pretend to be annoyed about. So many snacks. They'll definitely take a rental so she doesn't get crumbs in his car.

🪁Kidcore🪁 ~ Tell us about the earliest memory you can remember with your F/O!

Meeting him at a Tojo Clan party! Incidentally it was my introduction to basically everyone. He was one of a very few that spoke English and the only one not being an asshole to me!

(Childhood Friends AU, we meet when I find him crying in the corner of a park and I drag him home with me! What a cutie!)

🎧Lo-Fi🎧 ~ Let’s say your F/O is up late working on something. How do you support them, or how do you get them to go to bed?

Depends on how focused he is but generally he can be coaxed into bed with cuddles. Otherwise I keep him stocked in smokes, snacks, and water. He handles his own alcohol. I miiiiight bring him coffee. Maybe.

🎮Nintencore🎮 ~ Create a Pokémon team for your F/O!

This one’s tough. Do I make a team I think actually represents him, or one he would have? I’ll try for both. Majimeme can weigh in perhaps. I can say there would be absolutely NO dog types lmfao.

(Should I do a team for Kimi too?)

Team One

Muk - reference to the environmental impact of the factories Sneasel - a sneaky ambush type attacker Murkrow - bearer of misfortune Mimikyu - tell me this isn’t Kadokura in pokemon form. lonely, but watch out! Porygon-Z - science! technology! the future! Garbodor - majimemegoro insists he’s trash so….

Team Two

Sudowoodo - trees! nature! conservation! Ursaring - mountain village vibes, Hokkaido energy Abomasnow - Hokkaido, snow, do I need to explain? Sawsbuck - more nature shit Gothita - he has no idea what this thing is but it’s cute and it makes Mio happy so whatever Pangoro - “Kimberly this feels racist” “hush it markets well”

🐕Petcore🐕 ~ What animal reminds you of your F/O?

He’s known as a Coyote. He often acts a bit like a cat. Is there an intersection to be found there?

🍷Red Academia🍷 ~ What’s your favorite fun-fact about your F/O?

SPOILERS hehe

💤Sleepycore💤 ~ What is it like going to bed with your F/O? How do they sleep?

He’s clingy. Bad nights he takes a ton of pills and good luck waking his ass. Worst nights, night terrors, although those are pretty rare.

[studentofetherium]

and now for some criticism of a 50 year old book that none of my followers have read

The Monkey Wrench Gang is such a problematic text because while i love parts of its messaging, particularly the fact that people who care about the environment should rise up and protect it themselves, it's also wretched in many other ways, including the very message i like

so the point of the book is that a dam is being built, and it will kill the local ecosystem to do so. this is bad, so the protagonists, the titular monkey wrench gang, set out to stop it through the use of everyday common tools to sabotage industrial equipment. namely, a monkeywrench to loosen the screws. that's a beautiful message to send. we already have the tools to make the world a better place, we just need to use them

the problem is that the book is deeply, deeply libertarian. this exists in two forms. the first is the classical definition, the bottom half of the political compass. the book is deeply anti-authoritarian and anti-government. cool! i am too! but while it doesn't resemble the "sell cocaine to the child sex slaves" brand of capital L Libertarianism that would come to be known over the next 50 years, the book is still very much right-wing in nature. while the characters want to protect the environment, they do so because it's something they like, not because of some greater good. it's a selfish form of environmentalism. on its own, that might be fine, but the selfishness affects the text. the earliest act of monkeywrenching the characters engage in is blowing up billboards in the desert. are billboards a problem to natural beauty? yes, definitely. is anything gained by destroying them? no. if you have an issue with them, you can lobby with the local government to ban or limit them. except the book is so deeply libertarian that it sees the individual solution as the only one

also, the book is really sexist. i never finished it because the single female character is treated like shit, and the male characters aren't any more pleasant

but the book doesn't exist in isolation. The Monkey Wrench Gang formed a political movement, Earth First! who saw it as their bible to protect the world. with the understanding that the key to saving the world was in their hand, they set forth to protect the natural beauty of the US. i love Earth First! they are a cornerstone of my political ideology. but The Monkey Wrench Gang casts a dark shadow over the history of the group

Earth First! was founded by men who saw themselves in the protagonists of the book. rude, aggressive men. Libertarians. Dave Foreman (who i just delightfully learned is dead) in particular was outspoken about what the group should be, which was gruff, libertarian men who did things on their own. and for many years, that's what Earth First! was

but in the late 80s, Earth First! began to experience a cultural shift as they focused their attention away from the American Southwest and towards the Pacific Northwest, where extreme logging threatened to completely strip the region of its forests. a lot of the people who participated in Earth First! events in the PNW were young women (such as my mom), and importantly, left-wing. by the end of this cultural shift in the early 90s, Earth First! had a notably anarchist lean, and David Foreman had left (he was mad about this until his death. lol)

Redwood Summer was a months-long event where Earth First! had thousands of volunteers show up. the summer was preceded by an attempted FBI assassination too. between the bombing and the loud noise they were able to make, the movement caught national attention. Redwood Summer remains the event that the group is most known for, and once they got what they were trying for, aka local governments limiting the amount of logging that companies were able to do, there was a noticeable decline in activity

i love Earth First! but their origins are deeply problematic because it's so much rooted in The Monkey Wrench Gang and the budding libertarian ideology of the 70s. other texts were used as inspiration, such as Silent Spring by Rachel Carson or A Sand County Almanac by Aldo Leopold, but The Monkey Wrench Gang and the individualism it espoused were always a core part of the group, especially in its early days. it's also hard to separate The Monkey Wrench Gang from the practice of tree spiking, which is putting metal spikes in trees to prevent logging. this doesn't harm the tree, so theoretically a forest can be spiked, and the company logging it informed of such, meaning that they have to leave it alone, as if a spiked tree is logged, it will destroy equipment such as saws. the problem is that this can easily lead to loggers being hurt or killed, such as if a chainsaw's band breaks and strikes them. for advocates of the rugged individualism, this is fine, because it's their fault for logging in the first place, but any reasonable view will see this as unacceptable, because the loggers themselves are not the ones at fault. tree spiking was controversial for many years and Earth First! pamphlets would come with guilds for how to effectively tree spike. it was eventually banned, but it's a black mark on the group's history

i've lost the point here, a bit. all of this is the legacy of The Monkey Wrench Gang. i respect it for starting this movement which would go on to be so important, but at the same time, the text itself is rather vile and the worst aspects of Earth First! all lay in this and similar texts. i wish i could find more personal value in it, but it's a case where everything of value to do with it is what came after. people don't talk about the book much anymore except in the context of Earth First! but i think it has a fascinating history and despite all the Problems i just spent a thousand words talking about, i think it would do the world some good to have it and similar texts be apart of the discourse again

[spookclimber]

okay rant/mini(large words of) mental breakdown below

i walked to my car for a lunch break i didn’t want to take and discovered i have a parking citation, because my plates are expired, which i fucking forgot to do a few months ago because my life was falling apart and now it lowkey feels the same. i have rent, other monthly bills and now this that i have to fucjing deal with and also not park anywhere that could be bad until i get my plates renewed, which idk how long that’ll be.

on top of that my new job that i was fairly excited for is fine, i guess, but it’s it and pays not nearly what my college degree says i’m worth. i cannot handle sitting at a desk doing actually nothing until someone asks a question like this one i saw today, “should i click this ‘you have 3 new viruses’ popup.”

i feel like i used to be able to do things, and now i’m always exhausted and this stress is piling up again cause i need to do things and i CANT and i need to buy i really can’t which makes me feel like shit and worse and it’s a circular system.

especially when i haven’t been able to fall asleep normally until it’s past 2 am or something at the earliest, which just leaves me even more tired. on friday i was sick for my second day at the job and once i called it in i proceeded to then sleep, after my night sleepof like 12-7:30 am, from 9am to 11 fucking 30 pm, then was up for a couple hours before sleeping until 5 pm on saturday. this isn’t sustainable and it’s terrible and because of that i struggle even more when i need to try to work towards the financial issues but I CANT and i’m almost crying at work right now ranting this out because i have to get some words out and try to articulate what i feel.

the. another smaller thing but it still weighs on me is i’m like the only person wearing a mask at my work and yeah it’s it and cubicles and shit but covid still is going strong and people don’t seem to give a damn

i used to be able to do things i applied for and worked in two great internships in college why now am i having a meltdown over an objectively easier job that pays less well maybe that’s a part of it but god fucking dammit am i so stressed and, i don’t know, fucking out of it all the time in ways that don’t help me fix the problem at all.

oh another thing that isn’t fun is i was enjoying being nonbinary with my friends and all but i’m terrified to idk be that publiclally so once more i’m cosplaying my worksona except i flinch every time i see my dead name all around me and people call me by it so like why do i do this for a job that will barely make me rent and will bore me out of my mind? oh wait it’s cause i literally was unable to get any other position and i even almost got scammed in this process by someone who posed as a hr hiring person and put me through a written interview and all that jazz and got me hyped up before eventually i concluded with help it was a scam. applying for jobs fucking sucks but i guess i need to do it again between trying to make money outside of work and also at work which i’m not sure i’ll be able to juggle everything in addition to trying to get enough sleep and at least some time for me to decompress (but i’ve been needing more and more of that recently to work out and it’s related to previously stated issues) so i’m just losing it.

ido honestly believe i’ve been making strides in regards to my mental health and identity but es problema es capital as they say but i’m having such issues of motivation and getting things done that it’s a huge problem and my apartment is too much rent because i couldn’t move out when i lost my roommate because i definitely wasn’t capable of it and that roommate taught me i will literally die if i live with basically anyone that isn’t a very small specific group but because of that i’m stuck with an apartment with no food, a broken dishwasher that i’m too scared to call the landlord to fix, double rent and such.

like i knew i had some issues but my cascade of emotions once i saw the ticket on my break that id been forced to take i guess shows me that i’m really not doing well with the massive stress just hanging over my head

well i guess that’s all the words i have now. if you read all that i’m impressed and sorry i guess, but maybe i’ll find a way to dig myself out of this hole. maybe

[the-acid-pear]

Dreams tonite were actually remembered let me write down what I gathered

Earliest I can remember is a scene from what was Up 2. I didn't know it was Up 2 for a bit bc i was watching the movie in chunks (unsure if on or off camera). The protagonist was a woman this time, maybe Ellie, and she didn't look that old but she was dressed like a grandma with a cloth over her shoulders hunched back and w a cane.

When she tried to go up the stairs to her house (she was in a hurry) they broke and like monster house it was like they were trying to eat her. She was w a boy, anywhere from teen to young adult, who was holding her trying to pull her out. She even was completely submerged at one point.

She did make it inside the house tho and there were like 15 minutes left but I just didn't feel like finishing it despite finding it very enjoyable.

I think I was off at school now. We were gonna get a special class but I was sent off elsewhere. So now I was sitting on the side to a therapist's office. Middle top there was a desk with the professional and two chairs in front and to the side past the door there was I laying in the therapist couch™ just chilling with my phone as these people came and went. At least 2 did before Tim Burton showed up. His name sounded way longer tho so maybe they called him Timothy Burton or something.

Dude looked a bit more pale and disheveled but he had the black curly hair and beard. He was also pretty tall. And also very fucking awkward about the fact some guy he didn't know was in the room as he went to therapy (he was with someone else too I think he was being dragged here). He did say hi to me shyly waving a hand and I said hi twice bc I'm awkward like that. I thought of asking him for an autograph not bc i gave a fuck about the guy but bc i mean might as well you know? But then I didn't and was allowed to leave.

Outside I met with a shit ton of old faces. For starters there was my first BF from primary school who was having a meltdown because they tried to teach him about sexualities, but there was also the Bully™ also from primary school (he stuck longer than the first guy) who was just puking red, idk if it was blood but bro was going thru it. But I also looked my former bestie in the eye and spoke to her and she told me in the room another bestie of mine one with whom I didn't have a bad falling out had been in the class and I got really sad bc i loved that girl and I wanted to see her.

We then got lead to a big field. Reality and fiction mixed idk if I was back in the movie or not. I don't remember this as clearly. I complaint about the surroundings coloration. I met with two men outside. I stole two different pairs of sunglasses, second from a bat man (like the rusty lake guy, he was asleep).

Then I was with my class. And we were tasked to remake some... Buildings we'd written about before.

They made us run towards a wall full of boxes with clothes where we'd pick whatever we needed most, except as I looked around them not finding anything I needed (I wanted something masculine) I realized these were all clothes from my grandma. Complaint to myself about my dad not telling me where they were before.

I went inside of a warehouse. I was looking for art supplies. Many people were working on wood. There were half finished chairs on a table. I didn't know what I wanted

With another guy we found in a shelf pens inside a pencil case, and for some reason he was removing them one by one. Bro spilled some liquid paper (LICUI PAIPER) on my black puffy jacket. I was upset

I walked past a now SECONDARY school classmate. Not a friend, but the third wheel of the big brain sisters. She was killing it with her design.

Then a primary school guy again, a good friend. Good aside from us being extremely toxic that is. We made each other worse. Anyway his thing was flat and ugly it was just a sea with a little island and and even littler palm tree or perhaps human. I laughed really hard because I remembered this was what he had originally written in an act of laziness, and I loved it. He was actually touched by the fact I remembered such a thing and thanked me.

I went outside. Outside they didn't let me touch my notes, in fact, they took them away. The 2 men were now 2 teachers, I'm sure women. I was frustrated. I kept thinking of other things I'd do and after failing really hard to draw an arm I decided actually I'm not going to fucking do this.

And then I woke up

[tyravenholme]

FF7 Remake/Rebirth Theory

We shall be stepping immediately into spoiler territory, so if you want off this train, now's the time. Ye have been warned. Anyway, as we are fast approaching the arrival of Final Fantasy 7 Rebirth and I have watched many of the videos and trailers that have come out for it, I still firmly believe that the explosion we saw at the end of Final Fantasy 7 Remake from Zack's perspective was the merging of his timeline with the Remake timeline. Before, I had very little to support the idea except that we see the party "pass" Zack and Cloud as they make their return to Midgar, but with some of the trailers for Rebirth, I think my theory has a lot more ground to stand on. In one of the earliest trailers, it starts with a news report and video of the party - minus Cloud - all being medevaced by Shinra troopers, with details of some kind of storm having destroyed a highway. This is most likely referring to the storm during the final battle after the highway chase, except the storm only occurs once the party crosses the threshold into the singularity, which does introduce some pretty big questions. A later trailer shows Zack and Cloud in Midgar, learning about the destruction that has befallen Sector 7. Now this is the part that really boggles my mind because it appears that everything that happened in Remake has happened, just somehow earlier because in the original timeline (and Remake assuming) Cloud makes it back to Midgar on his own a couple of weeks before the first bombing mission, so what happened to cause this seemingly sudden time skip of events where Zack and Cloud arrive to a Midgar where the Sector 7 plate has already been dropped. What's even weirder is that the party somehow all met together in the same way, despite not having Cloud with them, which really really boggles the mind cause there's a pretty important character among them who wouldn't have joined up with everyone and that's Aerith. Without Cloud, he doesn't join the party for the second bombing mission, doesn't fall into the Sector 5 Slums, and doesn't meet Aerith. If he doesn't meet Aerith, she doesn't take him back to Sector 7 where as they are about to split up notice Tifa on her way to Wall Market which is how Aerith becomes fully involved as she's the driving force pushing Cloud to help Tifa.

So how does Aerith become involved with the party without Cloud in this other timeline? I don't know, best guess is that it has something to do with her other self within the Lifestream giving her some memories she shouldn't have - just like Remake Aerith did as there are numerous instances where she knows things she shouldn't, like Cloud being a merc or who Marlene is and that she's at Seventh Heaven before Tifa can explain things. Of course, if this is meant to be the same Midgar from the Remake Timeline, then how is there a whole other party to begin with, the Remake party left Midgar to go after Sephiroth, and if the timelines have merged, how does this other party even make sense to begin with? - I suspect them passing through the singularity has something to do with it? Maybe? Either we've now got a merged timeline in which there are 2 Clouds, Remake Cloud and Zack's Cloud, as well as two different party groups, Remake Party that left Midgar, and the other that all ended up being taken by Shinra, with Aerith being taken back to her home as seen in one of the trailers (Can I also say how weird it is to see Zack, Cloud, and Aerith all in one room together. I may be a relatively new fan to Final Fantasy 7, but that alone made my eyes go wide) This theory is honestly kinda a mess and still has a lot of unsolved questions that absolutely need answers. Like, how the heck is Jessie at the Golden Saucer? Will Zack regroup with the other versions of Barrett, Tifa, and Red XIII that we see being taken by Shinra (assuming they haven't been experimented on by Hojo cause you know he'd do some weird shit) Will this series end with Remake Cloud and Zack fighting Sephiroth in order to save everyone and the world and even Time?

Also, given everything that has been shown in the trailers, can you even begin to imagine what we aren't being shown and what new things are waiting for us in Rebirth?

Can you tell I'm excited and have been waiting ever since I saw the words "The Unknown Journey will Continue" with anticipation and excitement and have thoroughly enjoyed everything I have seen so far of Rebirth.