#everyone say thank you mack

[softspiderling]

HELLO???😭😭😭

[hertl]

So, when are we hitting up the Calen Addison jersey retirement ceremony?

right after the blackwood statue goes up outside sap !!

[theaccidentfactory]

being a system is so funny sometimes because the second most frequent fronter's entire role is being The Normal One

[crossbackpoke-check]

re your notes on the mack post: oh. my. gosh and also 100% AGREED 😵‍💫

(he and will are both ******* those old men lbr)

- @bondedpairs

sometimes i have brief moments of introspection in which i wonder whether or not there are things better left in my drafts and usually i say fuck it we ball and then we DO ball and i love y’all for that. would you still love me if i whip out my footnotes and references

FOOTNOTES:

*somewhere in there is an aside about mack having to think about joe stroking somebody ELSE’s dick on the bench and having a panic about it.

**i DO see the will smith mackelini celebrini ?!;&/‘os everyone has been posting. that is the devil talking as in i cannot become invested or else it will ruin me. f1vegas you are NOT forgiven for putting ‘the tk/pat parking garage vibes of it’ in front of my eyes like my! god! i do NOT WANT TO KNOW THE NARRATIVE (too compelling i think. too much to get into with the bc(?)/bu rivalry and zeev buium was there and there’s another shark too somewhere??. i can’t care about a fish a MACKEREL you guys and will smith is not allowed to be my sharks bicycle because the team whoré borde already exists!!) where i was trying to go is sometimes you both fuck the same old man and he’s like. losers. get a polycule. and they end up together (obviously to me jumbo is in an ???? with patty and burnsie)

ABBV. REFERENCES:

ro’s other post where mack says to “ask smitty about [hunting cougars]” (src: holyjost)

ko’s transcript of fun facts from the interview that made me too endeared. girl nobody made you take advertising courses?? change your major

aforementioned f1vegas post. this is by tags alone because after reading that i was not capable of watching the video

[imminent-danger-came]

What if I told you, this was the same va.

[orionsstory]

thinking abt how my love for superhero content came from watching Power Rangers as a kid. Like if Operation Overdrive did not exist then I probably would not be publishing my fanfics LMFAO

[tgcg]

bad mouther, hole master

TG: kissing with tongue is gross as hell

CG: COME THE FUCK OFF IT.

TG: what

CG: I'M SAYING SHUT UP.

TG: oh

CG: IT'S NOT THAT WEIRD. IT'S LIKE THE NATURAL PROGRESSION OF REGULAR KISSING TO EVENTUALLY INCLUDE THAT. IF YOU HAD ANY SEMBLANCE OF ROMANCE GHOSTING THROUGH THE DEVOLVING REMNANTS OF YOUR THINKPAN YOU'D APPRECIATE WHAT IT BRINGS TO THE NUTRITION PLATFORM OF ANY CONSENTING CONCUPISCENT RELATIONSHIP!

TG: youre talking about it like its a goddamn military weapon or some shit

TG: some kinda scientific fuckin method to fondle a dudes mouth with your own mouth thats

TG: thats gross

TG: this isnt supposed to be a debate before fuckin congress on the pros and cons of getting your mack on

TG: its i would say a reasonably personal thing to react about and thats just my reaction man you dont gotta arbitrate it

TG: and like why the hell do they have to linger on it so long in these movies do they really want me to immerse myself in people necking each other that much

TG: roll the sounds around in my earholes like im swilling a fine fuckin wine

TG: well my professional opinion is that shit tastes and sounds mad gross and tbh i havent seen a single movie where it was close to being any kind of necessary

TG: its just a cringy waste of everyones time

CG: YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT, AND I DISAGREE WITH EVERYTHING THAT COMES OUT OF YOUR IGNORANCE GASH, YOU LUMP OF TIGHT-LIPPED CLUELESSNESS.

TG: did you just homestar me

CG: FOR THE SAKE OF ARGUMENT, SINCE YOU'RE APPARENTLY DESPERATE TO START SHIT WITH ME RIGHT NOW: HAVE YOU EVER EVEN DONE IT?

TG: hell no

CG: THANK YOU FOR PROVING MY POINT.

TG: proving your point--

TG: bro have uh

TG: have YOU???

CG: EXCUSE ME? HAVE I WHAT?

TG: come on

TG: i walked into this stupid conversation with a fucking shovel and by god am i digging myself a damn hole big and wide enough for every dave across time to squeeze in so i might as well get cosy in this shit before we all start collectively shoving dirt in our mouths

TG: bet your ass im taking you down with me though

TG: grab your spade and get digging man

CG: GRAB MY WHAT????????

TG: just tell me

CG: ???????!!!!!!!!

TG: karkat

CG: NO!

TG: f-

CG: WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM!!!!! WHAT PART OF "SHUT UP" DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND????

TG: wait no

TG: oh my god dude

TG: you can spin that shit all you want but you can do it the hell away from me

TG: i do not need to be hip to your weirdo foursquare fantasies

TG: patently not my business

CG: STOP RIGHT THERE. JUST SHUT IT. I AM PUTTING US OUT OF OUR MISERY RIGHT NOW. I AM CONDUCTING AN ACT OF MERCY ON THIS INSANE FUCKING CONVERSATION AND YOU ARE GOING TO ZIP YOUR LIPS AND TAKE IT.

CG: HERE IT IS: YOUR SINGLE OPPORTUNITY TO PRETEND YOU NEVER SAID THAT TO ME. I AM GOING TO FORGET YOU MADE A COMPLETE MOCKERY OF ME AND MY CULTURE THIS ONE TIME. AND LET YOU CONTINUE TO DIG YOUR STUPID, SHITTY HOLE.

CG: AND DAVE, I AM BEGGING YOU NOT TO WASTE IT.

CG: TO ANSWER YOUR SHOCKINGLY INAPPROPRIATE QUESTION, NO I HAVE NOT DONE IT.

CG: WHO GIVES A FLYING FUCK.

CG: HAPPY?

TG: ……..

TG: way to defuse the situation solid work

TG: real gold star effort grabbin that lit wick and blowing on it

TG: ok first of all you asked me first so dont act like im the one being a weirdo about this

TG: second of all i didnt mean it like that and you know it

TG: THIRD of all what the hell was the point of engaging the knightly theatrics then if you cant even verify that shit

CG: WELL FUCK, SORRY DAVE! I GUESS I'M JUST A FUCKING ROMANCE ENTHUSIAST! I GUESS I GIVE A MAJOR SHIT ABOUT THE THING YOU'RE OPENLY MOCKING TO MY FACE! IS THAT SO IMPOSSIBLE FOR YOU TO WRAP YOUR THOUGHT SPONGE AROUND?

CG: AND IT WAS COMPLETELY REASONABLE FOR ME TO ASK YOU THAT, YOU CONGEALED FETID NOOKSTAIN! MY STATUS ON THE MATTER HAS LITERALLY NOTHING TO DO WITH THE POINT EITHER OF US IS TRYING TO MAKE.

CG: TRY TO KEEP YOUR NUGBONE FROM CAVING IN ON ITSELF WHEN I DROP THIS BOMBSHELL: I'M ALLOWED TO HAVE OPINIONS ON THINGS I ACTUALLY KNOW ABOUT, EVEN IF I HAVEN'T DONE THEM! I DON'T JUST GO TROUNCING THE FUCK ABOUT LOBBING MY UNFOUNDED OPINIONS AT PEOPLE LIKE I KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT ANYTHING. UNLIKE SOMEONE WHO MAY OR MAY NOT BE INVOLVED IN THIS CONVERSATION WE'RE HAVING RIGHT NOW!

TG: youre

CG: I’M TALKING ABOUT YOU BY THE WAY. THE SOMEONE IS YOU.

TG: oh gimme a break

TG: bro youre going apeshit over something you havent even done

TG: you know what that sounds like to me it sounds like an overcompensating fake fan who doesnt get any

TG: you heard of troll napoleon complex

CG: AT LEAST I ACTUALLY FORMED MY OPINION BASED ON CAREFUL CONSIDERATION --

TG: -- oh yeah i bet huh

CG: -- INSTEAD OF JUST BANKING ON NUBJERK --

TG: -- not a real thing you just said

CG: -- REACTIONS AND WRINKLING MY SNIFF NUB AT ANY SIGNS OF GENUINE PHYSICAL INTIMACY!

TG: stop saying nub

CG: YOU EMOTIONALLY CONSTIPATED BULGEWAD

TG: not too much worse than being a perpetual fountain of emotional diarrhea

CG: DON'T YOU DARE.

CG: DON'T YOU DARE TRY TO USE THAT AS A "GOTCHA", YOU--… YOU! FUCK!

TG: dude did you actually run out of insults

TG: okay this is getting concerning

TG: youre the international dude of verbal dunks

TG: that can not be happening

CG: AAGHRJRGHJRGRHJAGHRJGRHJAGRHJRGRHJRGRHRJR

TG: you cant run out of em youre like the ultimate peddler of hate

CG: YOU DON'T THINK I'M CRITICALLY AWARE OF THE HOOFBEASTSHIT I'M SPEWING NIGH FUCKING CONSTANTLY?! I AM PAINFULLY COGNIZANT OF HOW MORONIC EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS IS!!!!

TG: feel like ive done some damage here

CG: ESPECIALLY MYSELF!

TG: alright bud time to calm down

CG: YOU CALM DOWN!!!!

TG: okay whatever!

CG: WHATEVER!!!!!!!!

TG: jeez

…

TG: here

…

CG: UGH.

TG: yeah

TG: really glad stuff like this happens in private

CG: YEAH. SAME HERE.

CG: JEGUS, CAN WE GO BACK TO BEFORE WE HAD THIS CONVERSATION? I DON'T ASK YOU MANY FAVORS, SO SURELY YOUR SLURRY OF ILL-DEFINED TIME POWERS CAN ALLOW YOU TO DO SOMETHING LIKE THAT.

CG: JUST LIKE, WIPE THAT WHOLE THING OFF THE SLATE.

CG: LET'S START OVER. SAY, FIVE MINUTES AGO. HOW DOES THAT SOUND?

TG: what conversation?

CG: OKAY, GOTCHA.

[russellbby]

Sometimes you just need your brother || Pt.1

Summary: in which max's little sister finally feels free from her home life and max is there to support her straight away.

Makayla Verstappen (OC) x f1 grid

Series

makaylaverstappen

Liked by maxverstappen1, danielricciardo and 123,828 others

makaylaverstappen: study & new friends🦈💗

view all 1,183 comments

user12 Prettyyy😍

user61 Sharks are your new friends ?!

user81 Future marine biologist here !!

user62 The aesthetic✨

maxverstappen1 If u die, it’s your own fault!

makaylaverstappen wow, thanks bro

maxverstappen1 welcome Mack :)

user15 I love their relationship🥰

user61 Max and Kayla >>

user29 🥰🥰

user33 Max💀😭

landonorris How are you not scared ??

makaylaverstappen Nothing to be scared about!

landonorris It’s sharks!!

user19 Lando😭

user44 The fact that she’s 16 and so many people wouldn’t want to do what she’s doing🤣

//

Everyone knows what Jos Verstappen was like treating Max Verstappen growing up. Everyone saw that Max didn’t see his mother Sophie and his sister Victoria much due to him always travelling around the world.

When they got divorce, Jos went off and got married again and had more children who became Max and Victoria’s step siblings.

Max couldn’t say he had a favourite siblings, but when it came to Makayla Verstappen, her and Max got very close despite the big age gap.

Makayla Verstappen is a 16 year old, she has all her focus on her studies to hopefully achieve her dream of becoming a marine biologist.

If her father let her, that is..

Jos’s relationship with Makayla wasn’t good, they both argued all the time just because of the career Makayla wanted to have wasn’t good enough according to him.

They were always having an argument, like right now.

“Why can’t you just accept it’s the career I want to have!” Makayla said. “It’s not good enough Makayla, what good in the world does a marine biologist do?” Jos shouted.

“Mhm I don’t know! Making fucking looking after the animals and the planet?” Makayla shouted at him, something that she never had to courage to ever do until now.

“Don’t you dare shout at me, you know what will happen if you do that again? You’ll be out of this house” Jos spat has her. “I don’t wanna be there anyways!” Makayla said.

“Go then, I won’t care you are always in your bedroom all day everyday anyways!” Jos replied. “So, this is what you are doing? Kicking out a 16 year old!” Makayla exclaimed.

“Yes” Jos replied as Makayla just stared at him as he walked into the kitchen. She slowly made her way up to her bedroom to start packing a suitcase. After a few hours she had everything packed.

She was finally free.

//

Something that Max Verstappen wasn’t expected was to see his 16 year old sister the other side of this door, with a suitcase and a sad look on her face.

“Mack, how’d you get here?” Max asked her softly as helped her into his apartment and pulled her into a hug. The girl could see quite a few drivers there so she buried her head into his chest.

“C’mon, talk to us we won’t be able to help you otherwise” Daniel said as he walked over to the two siblings. “He kicked me out..” Makayla mumbled and all the drivers faces fell.

All that Max felt was anger, why in the world would his father kick out his daughter who is only 16 years old? He pulled out of the hug and went to go find his phone.

“Max! Don’t do anything please!” Makayla said as he tried to go after him but she was pulled into a hug by Lando. “Let him calm down,” Lando whispered.

Daniel went after Max to try to calm him down, Makayla had been led towards to couch and started to have a small chat with the drivers.

“Wait! What happens if I get put into care?! I’m not a legal adult!” Makayla exclaimed as Max appeared back into the room and wrapped his arms around his sister.

“Everything is going to be alright, I’ll get it all sorted out I promise you..” Max told her as he left a kiss on her forehead.

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Precocious 1

No tag lists. Do not send asks or DMs about updates. Review my pinned post for guidelines, masterlist, etc.

Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as noncon/dubcon, age gap, arranged marriage, and possible untagged elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.

This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: your family expects you to marry, but you don't expect to be happy.

This is part of the Three Sisters for Three Misters AU (this reader is know as Chicky)

Characters: Jonathan Pine

Note: And here we go.

As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me.

Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!) Please do not just put ‘more’. I will block you.

I love you all immensely. Take care. 💖

Heart racing, breath like fire, air stolid as beads of sweat speckle your scalp. There is only the moment. Only one shot. This is it. You have your target in sight. You squint down the barrel of the rifle and narrow your focus. 

One, two-- 

Cheep, cheep, cheep-cheep-cheep. The melodic tweeting of birds sounds from your single airpod. You sigh and steady the gun. You press down on the earbud to dismiss the incoming call. You reset your shot and follow the unwitting target as they twist and turn, searching for their adversary. For you. 

You take the shot. Right between their shoulder blades. You smile at the splatter of yellow paint across their vest. They stagger and twirl around in disappointment. They harrumph and toss down their gun.  

“Ah damn it!” Mackenzie stomps his foot. “Bull shit.” 

You point the barrel in the sky as you emerge from your perch, “don’t be a sore loser, Mack.” 

“Whatever,” he pouts. 

The tweeting starts again. You reach to tap the bud, this time answering the call. You kick through the dirt as the other players disburse. Game’s over. Back to reality.

“Howdy,” you trill as check the canister on your gun. Almost a full round left. It’s not how much you shoot, it’s where. 

“Where are you?” Your mother snips.  

“Hm,” you raise your wrist as you sling the strap of your gun around your shoulder. You tug back your sleeve to check your fitbit. “I’m not late.” 

“What do you mean you’re not late? Where did you go?” 

“Mom, I’ll be there,” you huff. “With bells on.” 

“Oh, trust me. I will hunt you down,” she sneers. “You will be here in one hour. Dressed. Acceptably.” 

You roll your eyes. You prefer it when she can’t see it. You love her, you know she means best, but you’re an adult. You agreed to her demands so why is she so rude? 

“I will, mom. I’ll even put a bow on,” you giggle. “Anywho, time to claim my prize. Ta.” 

You hang up without waiting for her no doubt scathing retort. You stride up to turn in the gun and your helmet. The gloves and boots are your own and your trademark hot pink outfit is custom-made. You get a voucher for free round of play and another medallion claiming you as champion.  

Your mom chides you often, says it’s a child’s game. Well, if she insists on treating you as one, you may as well be one. You stop and chat with a few of your competitors, some of them regulars, others just out for a day of fun. The older men aren’t very talkative. Not even a congrats on your win. 

Oh well. You try not to let the unhappiness of men rule your world. If you did, you would never do anything at all. Besides, you’ve sacrificed enough. You promised your father you’d behave and that you would show up for dinner. Well, that’s just the beginning of the agreement. 

You strip off your canvas and jacket and change out of your dirty pink jeans. You pull on a pair of lululemon flares and a loose white tee, sheltered only by your car door. Your mother would be scandalised to see it. You cackle and shove everything in your trunk. 

You blast some 90s pop for the drive. It amps you up and wards off the dread of what awaits you at home. As you drive up to the gate of your family estate, you turn down the music. You stop your out-of-tune singing and push your shoulders back. This is the real battleground. 

You pull into the garage, parking in the empty spot between your father’s lexus and your mother’ cadillac. You keep your head down as you get out. You near the interior door and ease it open. You listen to the house. You hear the flurry of the kitchen staff and all those others brought in to prepare for dinner. 

Sigh, your whole life has been parading around for company. 

You peek through the east doorway of the kitchen. Your mother screeches as she demands that the dessert be redone. You duck across and hurry upstairs. 

You swing yourself into your room and sigh. You take out the dress hand-picked by your mother. She gave you options and you bartered something cute. She wasn’t happy about the length but the faux petals around the neckline convinced her. You just love that it’s pink! 

You drape the hanger from the handle of the drawer on your vanity and look in the mirror. You take out a face wipe and clean your face of the residue of sweat and dust. You wish you could have stayed for the afternoon matches but responsibility calls. 

You begin your usual process. Primer, concealer, foundation. As you blend, there’s a tapping at the door. You recognise the melodic rhythm. You whistle back and your eldest sister enters. She’s already done up, all but her lips. She wears a burgundy robe and matching slippers with pearls. 

“There you are,” Kestral says. “Mother’s been squawking all day.” 

You look at her in the mirror and shrug. She looks down her nose at you. She has the same imperious expression as your father. If you didn’t know better, you’d be scared. 

She laughs and puts her hands on her hips. “Please, let me do your hair so she doesn’t tear it out.” 

“If you want,” you shrug, not very bothered by the task. You’ll make do. 

“Oh,” Kestral nears, “that dress is so you.” 

She touches the fluttery portrait neckline. She’s a bit more sophisticated, a lot less flowery. You dab on some blush and smear it with your fingers until it looks natural. 

“What about Wren? She’s usually much more elusive than me?” You ask. 

“Oh, yes. She took her nose out of her book for five seconds to get the witch off her back,” she takes the wide toothed comb and starts from your ends. “Even after a lifetime, she can’t really accept that this is what we were born for. I worry for her but she locked her door.” 

“And probably climbed the window,” you snort. 

“Always the most clever of us,” Kestral agrees. She’s silent as she untangles your hair. “Are you nervous?” 

Her eyes meet yours in the mirror. You shrug and hold off on the eyeliner. You’ll let her figure out your hair before that. 

“Strangers, aren’t they? But mother and father were too.” 

“Mm, and look how well that turned out. I don’t think they’ve been alone together since right before you were born,” she scoffs. 

“Likely not. But... mother says the men are well-bred. Polite.” 

“Frigid,” Kestral grins. “You must read between the lines. That is how society talks. They never say the truth, the toe around it until it kicks you in the teeth.” She takes a pin and secures it in your hair. “I’ve asked around but people never talk about interesting things, do they?” 

“No, not really.” You make a face at her in the mirror, a clownish smile, “am I pretty, sister? Will mother approve of me?” 

She chortles and shakes her head, “oh, it will be quite the night, won’t it?” 

“Don’t act as if I will be the only menace. And I’m not so worried about mother, as she shouldn’t be of us. We have to impress these men, not her, right?” 

“Impress? Well, I shouldn’t need to try for that. He can win me over. Tradition and all,” she drones. 

The door clicks behind her and you both give a start. You turn as Wren stands against the door, her eyes wide and her hair as unwieldy as ever. So much as she tries to tame it, it has a will of its own. Despite her reticence, she is much the same. 

“I saw one,” she says. 

“Saw one?” You echo. 

She hushes you and comes forward. She’s in a plum sweater and linen pants. Her glasses are tangled in her hair and crooked. She has a book under her arm. 

“He’s tall. Blonde. Look,” she points to the window. You and Kestral share a look before you rise. You follow her to the window Wren remains by the vanity. 

“Oh, wow, isn’t that typical?” Kestral drawls, “an antique car. Well, Wren, you should hope he’s yours then. By the looks of it, he’ll spend more time with that beast than you.” 

She squeaks and flutters around behind you. She’s always been the softest spoken of you all. Reserved but willful. Most wouldn’t guess it, but she’s rather funny when she wants to be. 

“Mm, he has manners. He is chatting rather intently with Reginald.” 

“Yes, Reginald can be rather chatty,” Wren murmurs. Sometimes, she is too honest. 

“Well, Kes,” you turn away from the window and lean against the wall, “you said you asked around. What did you hear?” 

“Like I said, gossip is rarely useful,” she sighs and retreats. “Mine, Conrad... he’s not much history in ‘society’,” she emphasizes the last word with her fingers. “From what I’ve gathered, he comes from a well to do family. I heard more of his brother than him. Frustratingly mysterious.” 

She crosses her arms and sits on your bed, “then there’s Laufeyson, Wren’s match. He does have quite the reputation. A tricky man. I’m not entirely sure why mother and father chose him but no offense, Wrenny, you are a middle child.” 

“Mm, I’d say better than no one but no one sounds rather nice,” she mutters. 

You laugh. She really is so silly. 

“And me?” You prompt. 

“Pine. Proper gentleman by my measure. Never a toe out of line. No mystery, no scandal. He sounds like he was created in a factory.” 

“Boring?” You comment. 

“I wouldn’t expect any of them to be more than,” she examines the crimson tips of her manicure. “But we should try to pretend they are interesting.” 

“Forever,” you utter. 

“Forever...” she agrees dully. “So is our lot, yes? We must make the best of it. Get through tonight, then the wedding, and when all is said and done, we can still be us.” She leans back and crosses one leg over the other. “I’ll take Lottie with me. She’s a loyal stead and I’ll need something fun to ride.”  

She gives a wink and you giggle. Wren squeaks and rocks bashfully. 

“Wren, you can take all your books and add a thousand more to your shelves. You could build yourself a castle and lock yourself away to read forever,” she says, “and Chicky,” she looks at you, “you can just be you. Go out shooting or dancing or shopping. As long as our duty is met, we will be free. Truly. No more mother, no more father. We will laugh in their faces and say ‘no’.” 

“I hope you’re right,” you turn back to peer out the window. 

The blond man stands below. His brow suit is sleek and tailored. Even from there, you can tell it is cut of fine material. He looks up as you peer down and you think for a moment he sees you. You flinch and draw back behind the curtain, tugging it across the pane. 

“I do too,” Kestral agrees. “Think of it this way, we want out of this house. This is how we get out. Then we have our own titles, our own rights, and our husbands, well, they can have their own hobbies.” 

You nod and go back to the mirror. You sit and look at yourself. You want to believe Kestral. She’s never been an optimist but she’s just so desperate to get away, she’ll believe her own lies. You want to think this is an escape, yet you can only see things staying the same. You’ll still be putting on a mask. Still living to someone else’s standards. 

[yoursweetestbunny22]

Rudy pankow x Co-star!Reader [social media au]

Rudeth

Liked by madelyncline and 804 236 others

Rudeth just some bts pics from obx s1 🌊 #watchobxonnetflix

View all 4802 comments

madelynecline don’t post pics of my gf without permission rudy 😠

rudeth sorry not sorry

User23674 white boy of the month 🫡

y/nismywife so…Luna and jj endgame?

user35681 jj and kie way better

madisonbaileybabe 🫣🫣🫣

wh0reforrafecameron spill the tea girllll

User33458 the last pic?!

rudypankowupdates they're part of the same show, it's no big deal

user33458 @rudypankowupdates they would look good together tho

y/nuser

Liked by rudeth and 234 568 others

y/nuser i made some pancakes and took them to the set!! Everyone liked them, I think I should focus on cooking and forget acting..just sayin🎀

View all 3867 comments

hichasestokes mother thank you for the food🫡

y/nuser always son🫡 someone needs to take care…your dad💀

user23356 @y/nuser NOT BIG JOHN HAHAHAH😭

drewstarkey why the hate tho?FAN 🙄

y/nuser sorry proactive one love ya

austinnorth55 this pogues nowadays 🙄🙄

rudeth where’s my pancake?!?

y/nuser 🧍🏻‍♀️

user23346 @y/nuser GURL?!?!

jonathandavis @y/nuser smooth yn.REAL SMOOTH

madelyncline @ynuser I feel betrayed

hichasestucks @madelyncline IM SORRY?!

rudeth

Liked by y/nuser and 890 347 others

rudeth pasta?I love pasta

View all 5087 comments

y/nuser that’s a coincidence hum

rudeth oh it is?

user2376 @rudeth what’s going on?!😭😭

user2098 THE SECONG PIC!?!I NEED TO KNOW WHO TOOK THAT, POOKIE?!

sabrinamaybank THE ABS?!RUDY IM IM IM AAAAA

hichasestucks and the “no pogue on pogue macking”?🫣🫣

user12765 SIR?!?

user87610 at this point I’m just waiting for the marriage announcement

y/nuser

Liked by drewstarkey and 347 763 others

y/nuser pasta and 💐

View all 8789 comments

rudeth ❤️ *y/nuser liked*

y/nwifey y’all need a dog?I can bark🐶!!!

user27496 I KNEW ITTTTT..YALL JUST SAY YOURE DATING ALREADY 😜

rudypankowupdates gurl it’s just pasta and flowers

user27496 @rudypankowupdates THE EYES THO?Gurl stop being blind

madisonbaileybabe giggling rn you’re so pretty

y/nuser stop babe you making me blush🫣🫣

Jjbestgirl23 what does Rudy see on her?…

user4567 gurl..you’re getting all pissy when you know you don’t even have a chance with him PLEASEEE

y/nismygirlfriend you’re so pretty just give me a chance 😔

rudeth

Liked by y/nuser and 987 674 others

rudeth In the depths of my being, you reside as the essence of my existence. With every beat, I confess: I am yours, wholly and eternally.

Love you❤️ @y/nuser

View all 9894 comments

y/nuser shakespeare’s got nothing on you love 💋

jjlunaendgame SHE’S SO FUNNY ICANT😭

randomuser I GET IT RUDY I GET IT

user3765 HELPHAHAHAHAH

hichasestucks chatgpt?

rudeth don’t be jealous you’ll be my number 1 always

madelyncline @rudeth Shut up u have my girl and now you’re trying to steal my man?😔😔😔😔GET OUT OF HERE

drewstarkey I want to be invited to the wedding

madisonbaileybabe OMG MY BABYS OMG OMG

jonathandavis im so single…

user7654 I VOLUNTEER

Obxoficial: Our Luna and JJ🌊❤️

randomuser THAT’S A CONFIRMATION?!?

rudypankowupdates happy for you…😔

Bunny : this was my first social media au so hope you like it!!

[gentlebeardsbarngrill]

09/21-22/2024 Daily OFMD Recap

TLDR: David Jenkins: Cast Honks; Fan Honks; Rhys Darby; Ruibo Qian; Kristian Nairn; Vico Ortiz; Nathan Foad; Samba Schutte; Rachel House; Gypsy Taylor; Lindsey Cantrell; Articles; Fan Spotlight; amuseoffyre; Doll Normal; Love Notes; Daily Darby/Today's Taika

= David Jenkins =

Whelp, Chaos Dad is keeping us all on our toes still! Grats @edwarbteach for being perceived and getting answered by Dad!!

Source: David Jenkins Twitter

= Cast Honks =

Fan Honking hasn't stopped since David's last tweet-- but with the new one, we've got more cast interaction! Con is back with spreading Adopt Our Crew posts on Instagram!

Source: Con's Instagram Stories

Hugo, our darling OFMD Cheerleader is still at it. Netflix has been asking what you'd like to watch on Netflix in 2025-- What a lovely prompt for the honkening- if you haven't already, feel free to let them know!

Source: Hugo's Twitter

= Fan Honking =

The crew is really keeping at it with the honking this weekend! Some kind folks are sharing some fantastic data with everyone to help support!

Special thanks to the darling Katrina, aka kmostran over on Twitter for putting together this EXTREMELY detailed list of Cancellation/David events.

Source: Kmostran on Twitter

And as always our friend Ashley (Seven_Sugars over on twitter) has more fun data for us!

Source: Buttons (Ashley)

There's been so much fun fan-honking going on, memes, and art being created-- I just wanted to share one that caught my eye today:

Source: unpopularcult's Twitter / ramsay_b_OFMD's Twitter

== Cast & Crew Sightings ==

= Rhys Darby =

Outside of the clowning, we've had some Rhys sightings!

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Rhys Darby (@rhysiedarby)

Rosie also put out the call for some help with getting Rhys and Rosie's son, Finn, and his band Great Big Cow some more subscribers to their Youtube channel! The goal was to hit 1,000 subscribers-- and great news, they did it! If you aren't already subscribed, and you're interested, I'm sure they wouldn't mind more! Great Big Cow Band Youtube

Source: Rosie's Twitter

= The Cryptid Factor =

There's another video of the Edinburgh Fringe Live shows on The Cryptid Factor Patreon! Night two this time!

Source: The Cryptid Factor's Patreon

= Ruibo Qian =

Our Pirate Queen Ruibo is digging her adorable shoes today <3

Source: Ruibo's Instagram

= Vico Ortiz =

Vico was interviewed by LatiNation! Check it out below!

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by LatiNation Queer (@latinationqueer)

Source: Vico's Instagram

= Nathan Foad =

Nathan and friends on the tube <3

Source: Nathan's Instagram Stories

= Samba Schutte =

Samba 🤣🤣🤣

Source: Samba's Instagram

= David Fane =

Apparently it's been 20 years since the release of Bro'Town! David, Oscar Knightley, and Madeleine Sami voiced characters in the animated series back in 2004!

"A modern day fairytale about five Auckland teenagers growing up in the big bad city, bro'Town chronicles the schoolboy misadventures of Vale, Valea, Sione, Mack and Jeff da Maori in a proudly suburban, non PC satire."

David shared some videos but I couldn't fit them all on tumblr-- so here's a link to the repo with more: https://ofmd-renewal-repo.knowledgeowl.com/help/david-fane-brotown-20-year-anniversary

Source: David Fane's Instagram Stories

= Gypsy Taylor =

The fabulous Gypsy Taylor has been immortalized by our badass crewmate @amuseoffyre with a gorgeous Gypsy Muppet!

Source: Gypsy Taylor's Instagram

= Lindsey Cantrell =

Lindsey is so excited to see the tiny boats from s2 are living on!

Source: Lindsey Cantrell Instagram Stories

Also some cool news from the ofmd.buys.boats of Instagram!

Source: ofmd.buys.boats on Instagram

= Rachel House =

Rachel was interviewed by Sirius XM Canada Talks and she talks about working with Taika on Boy!

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by @siriusxmcanadatalks

Source: Sirius XM Canada Talks

== Articles ==

Kristian was interviewed by Queerty and does some lovely shoutouts to Nathan! Please check the article out below, and thank you @adoptourcrew for sharing this!

Source: AdoptOurCrew Instagram

Some WB news-- Our friends over at NeverLeftPodcast shared the news! Thanks dears!

Source: Never Left Podcast Twitter

== Fan Spotlight ==

= A Muse of Fyre =

Okay so I'm SURE you've seen the OFMD muppets around, but I got permission from the EXTREMELY talented @amuseoffyre to share them in the Recaps! I've been meaning to for weeks and then life got in the way--but Gypsy sharing her muppet seemed like the perfect time to spotlight them! If you haven't checked the OFMD Muppets out before, please oh please do! I cannot tell you just how brilliantly made and gorgeously DETAILED these are. From the intricate beads, to the facial hair, their expressions, these beautiful creations bring the OFMD Cast to life in muppet form! Every time I see them pop up on another platform, I continue to be astonished at the gorgeous craftsmanship! If you have a few minutes, please visit some of @amuseoffyre socials! Instagram especially has so many wonderful muppet posts! Thank you @amuseoffyre for bringing our beloved crew to life! More to come in upcoming recaps as there's SO MANY to see! Tumblr / Twitter / Instagram

Source: Fyre's Instagram

= Doll Normal =

Next up on tonight's fan spotlight is Doll Normal! One of our fantastic crewmates has written Netflix a song imploring them to Adopt Our Crew! This is phenomenal! Please give it a listen :) Socials: Instagram / Linktr.ee / Twitter

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Doll Normal (@doll.normal)

Source: Doll Normal's Instagram

== Love Notes ==

Wow Lovelies. What a weekend huh? Yall have been clowning/honking (however you wanna describe it) for days now and it's so incredibly uplifting to see! It feels like the beginning of the year again, all buzzing with life in the fandom!

I've seen lots of mixed emotions on the subject of renewal today, so tonight I just want to send you a couple reminders. If you aren't feeling up to Honking for any reason, whether that be that the ups and downs of the cancellation/renewal news, or you've got things going on in your life, or you just don't want to get your hopes up again-- please know, that is OKAY. If you are honking your head off, tweeting, tumbling, drawing, writing, creating, and putting your whole soul into the clowning after David's tweet on Friday -- That's OKAY too. If you're passively keeping an eye on things, waiting for news, or focused on other things-- that's also OKAY. Every single one of us experienced OFMD different from each other. Every single one of us experienced grief from the cancellation differently from one another. Every single one of us has or has not begun to heal differently. If someone is having fun honking-- that's great, keeping doing it babes! If you're feeling like you just can't bear the disappointment again if something goes wrong-- you do what you need to take care of yourself m'dears! Don't push yourself in a way that makes you feel worse. There's no wrong answer here in how to be involved in what's happening right now. Be kind to one another, and let yourself and others do their thing-- and all is well <3 No matter what happens, we're still here for you crew-- we still care. Don't feel bad for how you are coping and engaging with the fandom right now. Just be yourself. Goodnight lovelies, I hope the week ahead treats you with kindness and healing.

== Daily Darby / Today's Taika ==

I didn't wanna miss another day of gifs-- but I'm running out of image room, so we get these two iconic dude together tonight. Gif Courtesy of @dallonismysavior!

[fiapartridge]

💌 with the sweetest boy himself, the bu boy, macklin

i loved writing this, i love him, & yes, he is the sweetest boy ugh

and i haven't seen a single mack fic on here like 👀 why we sleeping on mack?? anyways, this is fluffy to the maxxxx

Stepping into his dorm, you took off your beanie as he worked to unzip the zipper of your large puffer. You grinned, placing a soft kiss on his lips as he smiled in return.

You loved days like this: grabbing coffee from the cafe downtown, shaking off snow and laughing at how ridiculous the two of you looked, comparing yourselves to dogs after a bath, and coming back to his dorm as he removed your articles of clothing without you ever asking because that was just the boy he was. He was your perfect boy.

You moved to sit atop his bed, opening his laptop, and scrolling through Netflix to find a movie to watch before you had to head back to your own dorm and brave the cold sheets of snow outside. He shrugged off his winter coat as you eyed his new shirt that you hadn’t seen him put on this morning before leaving to grab coffee.

“Mack?” you asked as he laid in the spot next to you, wrapping an arm around your shoulders and pulling you into the comfortable curve of his body.

He hummed in response, paying more attention to the movie on the screen rather than the curious yet amused tone in your voice. 

“When did you get that shirt?” you laughed as he looked down at his top as if he had forgotten he even put it on in the first place. The shirt in question? A white tee with the words “I love my girlfriend,” except the ‘love’ was replaced with a big red heart. And the back? A picture of you two on the ice during family skate at BU, smiling brightly at the cameraman (thank you, Lane Hutson).

“Oh,” he huffed out a laugh, a tinge of pink settling on his cheeks. “Case got it for me for Christmas.”

“And I’m just now hearing about this?” You rolled onto your stomach, your chin resting on his chest.

Even after a year of dating, you still made Macklin nervous. You kept him on his toes, never knowing how you'd react or if he scared you away or if he would lose you by doing one thing over another. He was very subconscious in that way. If he lost you, he wouldn’t know what he’d do. You were his whole entire life, and while many say it’s unhealthy to rely on a person that much, Macklin didn’t care. He was head over heels for the girl sitting beside him, and maybe that’s why he wore the shirt, to show people that you were his, that he was very much in love, and that he was very much taken.

“I-” he nervously stammered.

You laughed, shaking your head. “I’m messing with you, Celly.” You shrugged. “I think it’s hot.”

He rolled his eyes. “There is no way you think this is hot.”

Moving closer, you watched as his eyes wavered down to your lips and quickly back to your gaze. A small smirk danced on your lips as you mirrored his movements, glancing back and forth between his eyes and his lips. “I don’t know. Telling everyone you love me with a picture of us on your back? It kinda makes me feel special, you know?”

“Any other ways I can make you feel special?” he smirked.

You gasped, smacking him in the shoulder as he let out an amused chuckle. “You are so gross, Mack!”

“I didn’t even say anything!” he replied, drawing you closer to his body until you were resting on top of him.

“You implied it.”

“Mhm,” he chuckled. He gazed at you intently, admiring his girl as you looked away, feeling exposed. His hand lightly held your chin, moving your head to look back at him. “You’re the prettiest girl ever.” he whispered, holding your waist as your hands steadied yourself on his chest. He ran his thumb up and down the exposed skin on your hip.

“I hate you,” you said softly, trying to hide the light shade of blush that was increasingly spreading across your cheeks.

“Embrace it, baby,” he remarked, dragging one of his hands up your back and leaning your body down to his chest, your arms falling to either side of his head as he closed the small distance between the two of you, brushing his lips against yours before fully capturing them in a tender kiss.

Your bodies pressed together as if you were trying to melt into each other, lost in the intoxicating sensation of being so close, so connected. Your breaths were mingled, hot and ragged as you somehow pulled him closer, kissing him with so much desperation you were unsure where this fervent fire came from.

Maybe it really was the shirt.

Your lips parted reluctantly, and with a soft, breathless laugh, you traced the contours of his skin, marveling at the way his features felt as if they were made for you and only you to enjoy. They were made for you to kiss and to admire, to love. With a soft sigh, you leaned down, resting your head on his chest as his arms encircled your small frame, holding you close as if he never wanted to let go. 

“I should wear this shirt more often, huh?”

“Oh, shut up.”

[formulaforza]

MACK. oscar + "can i borrow a hoodie?" "i don't know, will i get it back this time?"

thank u sm lover <33

"Osccccc," you drag out the consonant, a smile on your face, goosebumps on your arms.

You're sat around the fire-pit in Oscar's back year, you and he and his parents and his sisters. It's late summer, and the air gets crisp when the sun starts to set. The crackle of the fire coats everyone in the thick scent of summer, but you still shudder.

"No," he says, sipping a beer, and you scoff.

"You don't even know what I was going to say!" You laugh.

He mocks your earlier tone, dragging out the letter sounds of your name the same way you'd done his. "You were going to ask for something."

"Can I borrow a hoodie?" You ask, flashing him your best puppy-dog eyes, your prettiest pout. "Please?"

"I don't know," he teases, even though he's already standing up and making his way to the sliding glass door on the back porch, making the journey to his bedroom for any one of his sweatshirts. "Will I get it back this time?" He laughs.

You shrug, even though both of you know if he wants it back he'll have to rummage through your closet himself for it. "I don't see why not," you smile.

[swee7dream]

how would the dreamies react to their s/o regressing for the first time in front of them after being super stressed and not being able to be a little ? ^^

it’s been a long time caregiver!nct dream x gender-neutral!regressor!reader

genres sfw age regression content, established relationship, hurt / comfort, angst in some, bits of fluff in all warnings involuntary / vent regression, regression block, negative self-talk, haechan's is long sry dni if you sexualize age regression. not only blocking but also reporting.

author’s note i'm SO sorry this took so long for me to get out. i promise i didn't forget about you, nonnie! i might've geared a little bit ( a lot ) off the prompt at times but i still hope you like it ! thx 4 requesting !

mark lee (ᓀ‸ᓂ) wc 642

With all your responsibilities lately, Mark finds it logical that you don’t regress as often as you used to. The last time he remembers was over three months ago. He misses taking care of you, hearing your sweet voice call out for your 'Mack!'. But he doesn’t want to burden you even more with any expectations to do anything you weren’t feeling up to do. He wasn’t planning to bring it up. Honest.

That was until you started coming home to avoid his kisses and go straight to bed. That moment left a pang in his heart.

In the silence and tension of your apartment, Mark finds himself in your little corner of tiny things, picking up your toys and dusting off your coloring books with longing. He misses his baby, so he’s going to get his baby back, he decides, no matter what it takes.

“Oh look, that new Disney movie came out you said you wanted to go see it, right?”

“I’m tired, Mark.”

“…okay.” He bites the inside of his cheek.

Just keep trying, Mark. You got this.

“Babe, I’m doing laundry. You want me to wash Cheese Doodle?” He knocks at your office door.

“Huh?” You raise your head as if you were a fish out of water. “Uh, yeah. That’s fine. Thank you.”

Hmph.

“What is that?” You give the box in Mark’s hand a look.

“It’s a game. Picked it up at the store. It’s like… Twister? But there’s something different about it. I dunno, I didn’t pay attention to the label and just bought it. Chenle asked that we bring some kind of board game for his party on Saturday.”

“Oh. Well, I have a thing on Saturday so tell him I can’t go but I hope everyone has fun.”

As the saying goes, the fourth time’s a charm.

“You’re not going to bed?” You rub your eyes, already in your night clothes and under the sheets.

“Not really tired,” he replies with a shrug as he makes his way out into the kitchen. “I think I’m gonna make myself some angel milk to get the sleeping juices going. That always worked for you. You want some?”

You’re already pretty tired, the events of the day had sucked every last drop of potential energy from you. Still, some angel milk in all its sweet, vanilla-tasting glory makes you lick your lips.

“…yeah. Please,” you answer.

When he comes back from the kitchen, he has your warm drink in one hand and Cheese Doodle—your orange puppy stuffie—in the other.

“Sit up for me, baby,” he says softly as he sits down on the edge of the bed, not wanting to spill anything from your favorite mug.

“Unicorn…!” You notice, taking the pink and rainbow cup in your two sleeve-clad hands. “Thank you.”

“Mhm.” Mark smiles. “and I just took cheese doodle out of the laundry too. Used the fabric softener that you like. Wanna feel?”

“Oh.” In a second, you’re like a cat rubbing your cheek against Cheese Doodle’s fur. “Smells good, Markie. Thank you.”

”Of course, baby. Feeling tiny?” He asks only now that he’s 95% sure you are.

”Little bit,” you admit into your mug, slurping quietly to not burn yourself.

”Aw.” He pouts. “That’s good. You know, Markie missed you, baby. I haven’t held my baby in such a long time.”

”Missed Markie too.” You blink at him with sleepy eyes and a milk mustache. “Lot.”

”Wanna cuddle for a little then?”

”Just for a lil' bit.” You nod, placing your angel milk on the bedside table.

Mark knows the mug will be forgotten by the morning but he'd rather make and waste a million angel milks than for you to forget him and Cheese Doodle again.

huang renjun ૮ ˙Ⱉ˙ ა wc 594

“Oh that’s a nice painting, Jun,” you praise, resting your chin on his shoulder as he sits on a stool. “Very pretty.”

“I feel like it’s missing something, though,” he says with a frown. “Here. You paint something.”

“On your canvas?” You look at him. “No way, love. I’ll ruin it.”

“You won’t. Now take the brush.”

“I won’t.” You step back and cross your arms. “I’m not gonna mess up this painting you’ve been working so hard on with my clumsiness.”

“What are you talking about? You always add something to my paintings.” Renjun gives you a look. The look that makes you want to roll your eyes.

“And they’re always so much better before me.”

“You don’t think that.”

“I do.”

“Why are you talking about yourself in this way all of a sudden?”

“Because it’s true!” You explode. There’s a burning in the backs of your eyes as you keep talking. “All I’ve been doing lately is messing up stuff for other people. I’m no good, Renjun.”

“…”

“My boss thinks it, my team members think it. I know you think it too!” You sob.

“Darling-”

“Stop it, Jun.”

“Darling,” he repeats, taking your hand in his. “come here.”

He pulls you in with one hand and wipes your tears with another, so careful he almost makes you think you are glass.

“What’s in that green binder in the bookshelf over there?” he asks.

“What?” You furrow your brows. “I don’t know.”

“Go check.”

You give him a look but make your way to the oak bookshelf; filled with sketchbooks, novels, and a singular green binder. You look at Renjun when your fingers touch the spine and take it out only after he nods. Your knees wobble as you flip through the pages so you let your bottom hit the floor.

In the binder are the handwritten notes from back before the two of you even started dating; flirtatious exchanges recorded on coffee shop napkins, gum wrappers, and ripped-up bits of college notes. The next stage of your relationship is at the flip of a page; rushed post-it notes of domestic living with 'I love you!'s and 'Don't forget to eat!'s kept safe in the plastic sheets.

You look up at him with surprise but he only nods his head for you to keep flipping pages. You flip through empty slips until you almost reach the back cover and find all the drawings you’ve made for Renjun over the years while in regression. Each and every one. Even the ones where you're mad at him and have him eaten by monsters.

“You kept them…” You pass a finger over a drawing you made of the two of you, your stickmen-selves holding hands and smiling in a rocket ship.

“Of course I did, baby. How could I throw away something so perfect?” You hear his voice next to you, having gotten up from his seat to crouch next to you on the floor. He gently pulls your head into his chest and his lips drop to kiss the top of your head. “I don’t think you mess up things, my love. Ever. You simply change their direction. My Lovebug is the most creative, innovative person in the whole wide world, didn’t you know?”

“Junnie…” You sob, the dam of pent-up emotions finally seeking release.

“Hi there, babybug.” He whispers. “I’m right here, lovey. Right here. Let it all out.”

lee jeno ૮ .◜◡◝ა wc 655

“Babe, the ice is melting and your coke is turning into gross, brown, sweet-tasting water,” Jeno warns.

“One second, baby. I just need to finish this assignment real quick,” you mutter with your bottom lip bit in place.

It seems you’re still in the same clothes from three days ago, the same amount of time Jeno’s seen you stay in bed studying. He’s beginning to think your butt might be attached permanently to the mattress at this point. When it comes to your bedside table, your 5-hour energy from lunchtime being the latest addition to the food trash and empty water bottle pile doesn’t fill him with any more positive thoughts.

“When’s it for?” He sighs. “Your assignment.”

“…what?” You turn your head to him but your eyes stay on the screen. “Oh, um, Friday.”

“It’s Monday. Come on.” Jeno pulls at your arm like a spoiled child. “I’m not even making you shower or anything. I just wanna hang out with my hermit, stinky, computer nerd. Will you grant me my wish please?”

You look up with a half-offended, half-amused expression and your jaw dropped.

“I’m not stinky!” You fail to shake off your arm from his hold. “I told you I’m coming! I just really need to finish this.”

“No.”

“Yes.”

“No.”

“Yes.”

“No.”

“Ye- ah!” You squeal as Jeno pulls at your arm, throwing you over his shoulder. “Jeno! I’m serious!”

“I’m serious too. Monday to Friday is five days-”

“Four days!”

“-and that’s more than enough time to finish your assignment.” He refuses to acknowledge your interruption. “You are going to eat a proper dinner with me on the couch as we watch TV and you’re gonna like it, you got that?”

“Augh…!” You groan, going limp on him.

“Oh, I know.” Jeno pouts as he sets you on the couch, covering you in your train-print fleece blanket. “I’m so mean, aren’t I? Asking you to take a break when all you wanna do is work, work, work.”

You just stare at him, squinting your eyes as you fail to hide a smile.

“Well unfortunately for you, gumdrop, babies don’t work! So I’m afraid I can’t let you do that. The police will come after me if I do. Child labor laws or something like that.”

He leaves a quick kiss on your forehead right before speeding to the kitchen. Jeno’s eyebrows wiggle in a wave when he returns with your food; apple slices, chicken nuggets, and fries all in their respective spots in your divided plate.

The original pasta and movie date night plan being scrapped for a Nono-Gumdrop night doesn’t phase Jeno. In fact, it excites him. Your projects and exams and assignments and professors... he tries so hard not to hold resentment against them all as they pull his baby away from him. But tonight? Tonight is different, and for once in his life, caregiver Jeno is triumphant.

“Thank you…” Your fingers wrap around the blue silicone and Jeno engulfs you in a bear hug when he sits down. Tight but not so tight it obstructs your arms when eating. “What are we watching, Nono?”

“Max and Ruby.” He smiles when you gasp.

“Love Max and Ruby!” You gush with a mouthful of apples.

“Do you?” Jeno drops his head to the side. “You do? You do? Nuh-uh. I do. It’s my favorite show in the whole wide world.”

“Well, ’s my favorite show in the whole galaxy!”

“Yeah? Well-”

You squeal, feeling ticklish when he nuzzles his stubble on your face.

“Nono, stop!” You giggle.

“Eat up, gumdrop.” He sighs, the feeling of his baby in his arms and eating a proper meal for the first time in days is an incomparable joy. “Two episodes and then it’s bathtime.”

“Ah, boo, Nono!” you whine but it turns back to giggles when he compresses you in his arms.

lee donghyuck ʕ˙Ⱉ˙‧:ʔ wc 994

“You there, Angel?”

You shake your head.

It feels strange, like your body isn’t yours, as you hold on tight to your dolls in your hands and see none of the lively sparkle in their eyes you usually do when you’re small.

“I’m broken, Hyuck,” you say with such a lack of emotions that you can’t tell if it’s actually you who is speaking. “I did everything right. I got dressed, I put on the music box, I’m trying to play for God’s sake. And nothing is working still. I feel ridiculous. A grown adult trying to act like a child.” You scoff.

“Hey, stop.” Donghyuck’s firm tone sends a shiver down your spine and you pull away. His shoulders drop when he notices; you’re scared and he’s only making it worse.

“That’s my baby you’re talking about, you know?” He tries again, with a softer tone this time. “Don’t talk about yourself like that. You are not broken.” He holds your cheek.

“I’m just so tired, Hyuck.” Tears come up and blur your vision. “Everything has been going on for so long at the exact same time and I just- I can’t anymore. I need to just step away from reality for a little bit but I can’t even do that. My brain is just locking me in here in this state of suffering for who knows how long and I have no way of getting out. Not even for an hour.” You sob.

“I know, lovely.” He wraps his arms around you, letting you in turn wrap your arms around his legs from your seat on the floor. “It’s been so much for so long. You deserve a little break. Take a deep breath. Let’s try to let go of all these grownup worries, okay? We can pick them back up later. Come on, Angel, breathe.”

Angel.

Channie called you Angel and you still don’t feel small. The realization makes for more tears to come up but you refuse to let another defeated cry leave you. The denim of his jeans is rough on your face but not rough enough to make you stop using it as a tissue for your tears.

“…okay,” you creak out. “Breathe in. Breathing in…”

“There we go.” Haechan passes a hand over your head, the sensation soothing you somewhat. “And out. one, two, three, four, five, six, seven. Good job, Angel. Nice long deep breaths.”

You repeat the action several times, following his counts and pushing yourself to feel his jeans under your fingertips and smell the woodsy notes of his cologne to ground yourself.

“Everything sucks,” you say after some moments of silence. “Everything sucks. I didn’t even ask for any of this. I just want to be small,” your voice breaks.

“And you will be.” Donghyuck’s touch is gentle, encouraging you without words to look up at him. The pad of his thumb is warm when it wipes the tears from your face, brushing against your damp lashes. “You will be. I promise.”

“I don’t know what to do, Hyuck. I’m all out of ideas at this point,” you admit.

“How about just trying to feel not sucky?” He scrunches his nose, the most tender of smiles painted on his face. “How about… just drawing a picture? Just one. Doesn’t have to be with crayon or marker like when you’re feeling tiny. It can be whatever you want it to be. Don’t think about being small, just about drawing.”

“…draw what?”

“Hm… what about your dolls?”

When you unwrap yourself from his legs to look at said dolls, it gives Donghyuck the chance to go grab your art supplies. Your dolls don’t have that lively aura you see them with when you’re small but you can almost feel a sort of pity and empathy from them. It reminds you of the type of support your friends give you in their messages despite the country lines separating you.

“And I’ll draw… a car. Jeno’s been getting me into Formula One.” Donghyuck pulls you out of your thoughts when his voice is so close it makes you turn to see he’s taken a seat next to you on the floor. He opens a pencil case right in front of you two and takes a black pencil for himself to begin sketching on some paper.

“Really?” You opt a red pencil.

“Yeah. It’s pretty interesting.” He shrugs.

“But ’s so boring.” You sniffle up some snot from your lightning-fast crying session. You didn’t even cry for that long, how come you can feel your eyes swelling? So annoying. “They just go around in circles.”

“It’s not just that though. There’s—pass me the red? Oh, you have it. No, it’s okay. I can wait—there’s like a ton of beef between them. I like watching the interviews and stuff. It’s like watching basketball or football.” Haechan lets out a groan as he lays on his stomach, resting a cheek on his fist. “That’s really pretty, baby.”

“Y’like it?” You move to mirror him, turning your drawing for him to see better. “Think I’m gonna add some other stuff too.”

“Like what?”

“I don’t know yet,” you admit. “Probably you. I always like drawing you. And then… your red car. You can take me and the dollies on a road trip. I like it when we have fun together.”

Affection floods out of Donghyuck, letting out an adoring ‘aw’ as he hugs you, leaving kisses on all the spots he knows won’t lead to a tickle fight.

“So cute! I always have fun with you. My Angel...” he hums into your temple.

“My Channie…” you mutter under your breath, sketching his head four times bigger than the rest.

na jaemin ଘ(੭ˊᵕˋ)੭ wc 664

“I’m okay.” You rub your nose. “Just a couple sneezes, Jaem. It’s not a big deal. I can keep studying for a little while longer.”

“You sneezed four times in a row.” Jaemin stands next to your desk chair with his arms crossed. “Do you know what that means?”

“What?” You sigh, knowing he won’t leave until you entertain him.

“You have the plague.”

“The what?”

“The plague.”

“Baby, I don’t have the-” Achoo! “the-” Achoo! “the plague…”

You move your mouse around your screen and click away at it but it doesn’t hide the reflection of Jaemin’s intense stare into your skull. He’s not amused. You spin your chair around.

“I don’t have the plague,” you repeat with a clogged nose, not even convincing yourself this time. “…I just have a little cold.”

“I wonder where you could have gotten that from, hm?” He turns you toward him by the chair’s arms and traps you by holding onto both of them and leaning in until your foreheads almost touch. “Maybe from studying a little too much? From stretching yourself too thin? Pushing yourself past your limits? Hm? Hm? hm?” He turns his head at an angle with each question, being obnoxious about his accurate statements.

“Five minutes.”

“No.”

“I just need to email this professor.”

“No.”

“I have a group project.”

“Good thing you have groupmates, huh? Come on, get off your pretty little butt.” He grabs you from under the armpits, placing your feet on the ground as if you were merely a bag of rice. “We’re playing hospital.”

“No…” you whine with dragging feet the whole time Jaemin guides you to the kitchen, his gentlemanly hand giving you no chance to run as it rests on the small of your back.

“Yes…” He pouts at you as he fills up the syringe with orange medicinal syrup. “Babies need be good and take their medicine when they are sick, okay?”

“Jaemin-” You pull your head the other way, holding his wrist away from you.

“Baby…” he sings, dodging your attempts. “Say ‘ah’, pumpkin.”

Pressing your lips tight doesn’t do anything, the plastic tip of the syringe still slipping in and filling your mouth with bitter medicine that makes a lame attempt at orange flavoring. You shake your head, still rejecting the cold syrup as it goes down, but it does regardless, chilling your throat when it does.

“Bleh!”

“Drink some water, baby.” Jaemin holds up a cup (when did he fill that up?) and you take it as if it were the key to eternal life.

“Taste so icky,” you say with your face scrunched up like a raisin. “Hate it!”

You’re sick and suffering from forced consumption of medicine. Jaemin knows this. Jaemin shouldn’t smile. But he just can’t help it! His baby is finally back after such a long, long time. he thought he was gonna die from BWS (Baby Withdrawal Symptoms).

“Aw…” His hands reach out to hold your face and squish your cheeks together. “Baby doesn’t like medicine? Babies don’t like yucky bitter things. Babies like… sweet yummy things! How about some hot chocolate, lovey-dovey?”

“Chocwate?” you ask with raised eyebrows.

“Hot chocwate.” His nose scrunches as he pinches your cheeks. “Does that sound good?”

“Yeah!” You hop free of his crab claws. “Hot chocolate! Wanna, wanna, wanna!”

“Be careful, sugarplum!” Jaemin laughs, twirling you with such ease it feels as if you were in a dance. “Why don’t you go put something on the TV while I make us the chocolate? Whatever you want, baby,” he says, but you’re already out of the kitchen and looking under blankets and cushions for the remote.

“Spongebob!” You hold it up to the ceiling like it were the sword in the stone.

“Except Spongebob. You know that shrinks your brain.”

“Aw!” You slump but quickly straighten up like a ruler. “Ah- Ah- Achoo!”

zhong chenle (ᯟ︿ᯏ) wc 622

“I’m so proud of you.” Chenle pecks your head as you hold his waist from behind. The smells coming from the stove you two stand in front of are nothing if not heavenly. “Pretty, funny, kind, graduated. How’d I bag you?”

“Mmm, I dunno.” You shrug smugly, as you look out the window. A content sigh leaves you as your eyes follow the raindrops that slide down your window. “Must’ve done something good in your past life.”

“Must have,” he hums. “Set the table for me? I’m basically almost done.”

“You got it.” You peck his cheek. “Smells delicious. Jaemin give you cooking lessons while I was gone?”

“I’ll have you know I’m a great cook. I don’t need any cooking lessons. Never have.”

“Ah…” You roll out the placemats with a sarcastic nod.

“But if I did, I would go to Donghyuck.”

“If you did, I would approve. His soups are good.”

“Mine are better.”

“…”

“Right?”

“Sure.”

The music playing from the speakers and lights in the apartment all shut off at once, not even the hum of the refrigerator sounding in the silence, the darkness. The thunder is so close it feels like footsteps. Heavy, angry footsteps coming close. Closer and closer to you.

The power comes back as soon as it left but you can’t seem to recover as fast. You don’t even remember dropping down to hold your knees, and in the dark you didn’t see how many tears came up to overflow from your eyes. Chenle calls out your name but it sounds so distant it doesn’t even register. It feels like you’re running out of oxygen like a deep sea diver falling hopelessly down to the ocean floor.

“Hey,” you take a sharp inhale at Chenle’s warm hands holding your cheeks ground you back to reality. “Hey, the power went out. Everything’s fine. You’re okay. You’re home, you’re with me. Nothing is gonna hurt you here, you hear me? You are safe.”

You almost knock Chenle over from his crouching position when you throw yourself on him, but he reads your body language just in time to catch you. His lips press into your hair, your temples, your shoulders, the softest of touches as you wail into his shirt. His heart breaks at how fragile you seem in the moment, like a porcelain doll with a chip. You sob and babble to the point that Chenle can’t understand what you’re saying. All he can catch is one word.

“Daddy…”

There’s nothing for you to do but cry, Chenle’s learned with time, so he lets you do just that. He lets you cry in his arms there on the floor and when you’re finally willing he attaches you to his hip as he walks around. He wipes your tears with a paper towel and makes sure you get a bottle of water to drink from to rehydrate.

His eyebrows furrow when you turn your head to dodge his spoon, rejecting the meal you were so looking forward to less than twenty minutes ago. This meal which was meant to be a celebration of not just the end of your education but of all your life up to this point. Of your growth, your endurance; of all the stress you put yourself through to come out victorious in the end.

You’re still victorious, he thinks. Even now as you fill up the apartment with tears, he’s so proud of you. His partner, his baby, the strongest person he’s ever met.

“Come on, dollface. Just one spoonful, yeah? Need you to eat,” he tries again.

park jisung (∩˃o˂∩) wc 668

“What’s that giant box?”

“What giant box?” He looks at you on the couch. “...I thought you were napping.”

“I woke up. What’s with that giant box you’re pushing into our house?”

“Oh, this?” Jisung looks down. “It's… a box.”

You blink, irritation in your tight-lipped smile at your boyfriend’s lack of cooperation.

“I know it’s a box, Ji. I'm asking what’s inside the box?”

“Box… stuff…”

“Jisung!”

“That’s not my name!” He whines as he shuts the front door. “My name to you is Ji! Or Baby! Not Jisung! It’s so scary when you call me that...” He sighs. “It was supposed to come before you started your vacation time, while you were at work.”

“Why?” Your eyebrows come together into a questioning frown.

“Because- just- you’ll see soon. Pass me the scissors? Thanks.” He pecks your lips, taking the scissors from your hands and pushing your back away with little force. “Now go. Get! Your surprise will be ready in a minute. Go… brush your dolls’ hair or something. It’ll be super quick.”

“Doll hairs? is it a Little gift?”

“Shoot.” Jisung bites his fist. “...can you just go in the bedroom already? It’s not a Little gift. It’s not.”

The instructions that came in the box of the not-Little gift said construction would only take thirty minutes. Not to fear, with super handyman Park Jisung to the rescue it only took three hours and two people.

“We’re done!” You clap, looking in awe at your brand new play kitchen, pink and wooden and creaky and yours. “Jiji, finish!”

“Yeah.” He sits back on the floor, wiping the sweat from his brow. “We’re finished. D’you like it?”

“It’s so pretty, jiji!” You beam, hugging his head and squeezing the brains out of him.

“I’m glad you like it, bub.” He nods at his work in approval. “You deserve it. Worked so hard recently.”

“Thankie!” You get up quickly, running barefoot into the bedroom to come back with a box of play food in all colors and sizes.

“Make you a lenonade, bubby!” You begin adding ice to a cup and add a lemon to it. “Ice cold lenonade.”

“Oh, I love your lenonade. Thanks, baby.” He takes the cup, making gulping noises and finishing it off with a loud and satisfied ‘ah!’. “Actually, are we playing restaurant right now?”

“Um… yeah!” you decide. “Welcome to my rest’rant! What would you like to order?”

“I would kill for a good burger.” Jisung pats his stomach like a starved man. “I hear you guys have some good ones, is that true?”

“The truest!” You smile. “One burger, comin’ up!”

You turn back to your kitchen and hum to yourself as you place a burger patty on the stove.

“No pans for that?”

“No pans!” You shake your head. “Special burger.”

“Ah, must be.” He mutters behind you.

When it comes to building time, Jisung acts like a to-be-blacklisted customer.

“Could I have no onions in my burger? I’m allergic.”

“No, you’re not.”

“It’s just play pretend, honey.”

“Oh. Then, yes you can, sir! No onions.”

“And no tomatoes please. I don’t like how the seeds get stuck between my teeth.”

“No tomatoes!”

“And could you cut the cheese? It kind of sends me to the bathroom.”

“Ew… okay, no cheese, either!” You toss the slice of play cheese to the side.

“…could you also remove the meat? I’m vegetarian.”

That’s the final straw. No meat? You look down at his ‘burger’: bread, lettuce, bread.

“This is what you want?” You turn to show him his order.

“Oh yes.” He smiles, clasping his hands together in anticipation. “That’s my burger! So tasty. Thank you, shop owner.”

“You’re welcome…” You give him a look. “Ketchup?”

“No thanks.”

“Mayo?”

“Bleh! Pass.”

“…barbeque sauce?”

“Oh, that’s my favorite! Lettuce and barbeque sauce burger, my favorite.” He licks his lips.

“Jiji, ew!” you whine.

tag list ( ask / comment to join ! ) @mystarsohee @cupofwyn @iwontlettheselittlethingsslip @aeriaeri

[tropes-and-tales]

Hi! If you do headcanons, can you do a Dating Ray Merrimen headcanon?

This is suitable for work!

Expect a long, long wait before you actually start dating.  Ray has no time for dating or relationships.  He’s not on any apps, and he certainly doesn’t want to be set up.  So when you drift through his life—maybe you’re a friend of Bosco’s girl—be prepared for the slowest of slow burns. 

It takes, let’s say…a month before Ray even notices that you’re hanging around with the crew.

It takes another month before he starts to remember your name.

Another month after that before you get the patented Ray Merrimen tip of the head in greeting each time you show up.

It is the slowest of slow burns.  You keep a little tally in your phone of how many words you exchange with Ray each time you see him.

You make a game of it.  Can you get Ray to answer you in more than a monosyllable?

The first time he finally does, you can’t help but laugh, and he narrows his eyes at you, not understanding the joke.

You know it’s a long shot with Ray.  You don’t get your hopes up—you still go on dates with guys you meet on the apps.  A few even tempt you into second and third dates, but no one can quite capture your imagination the way Ray does.

Even though you don’t seem to capture Ray’s imagination at all.  All of his brain power is consumed with bank schematics, armored van schedules, and planning his next heist.

But as much as you watch Ray and study him, you don’t really know him.

Case in point:  you assume he’s never thought about you, consumed as he is with his less-than-licit career.

You assume wrong.  Ray has been studying you on the sly too, and he noticed you the very first time you turned up.  Ray notices everyone, especially new folks, so when Bosco’s girl brought you around, he watched you and took in every single thing about you.

All those months when you felt invisible to him?  He was watching you, learning who you were. 

The thing is, Ray Merrimen is perfectly fine alone.  He prides himself on his discipline and self-control, and he is not the sort of man to chase a woman.

Instead, he sits back and watches and waits.  He studies you to see if you’re the sort of woman who can handle him.

All of this happens without you realizing.  You just think you’re a pining little idiot, so you’re surprised when you drink too much at one of Levoux’s parties and need a ride home.

“Don’t do that,” Ray tells you.  He takes your phone from your hand and cancels the ride-share you are trying to order.  “They don’t vet those drivers.”

The solution?  Ray drives you home. 

He’s quiet for most of it, but you’re a chatty drunk, so you talk and he listens, and you miss the little twitch at the corner of his mouth—his version of a smile.

He parks in front of your house, and he doesn’t leave until he sees your front door safely behind you.

The next time you see him, you thank him, and he tips you that same stoic nod in reply.

But you’re clued into him a bit now.  You’re falling into the same wavelength as Ray. 

Oftentimes, when you look across the room or across Bosco’s backyard, you see Ray watching you.

And when he catches you watching him, he tips that nod, gives the same small, tight corner-of-the-mouth smile.

When Mack celebrates his birthday at a club, you’re there in a dress that’s tight in the right places and short in the right places.

It draws a lot of male attention.

And Ray may pride himself on his self-control, but the absolute second he sees some fucking asshole eyeing you up, he’s at your side and refuses to move for the rest of the night.

Going to dance with your friend?  Ray lurks in the shadows right at the edge of the dance floor.

Going to the bathroom?  Ray walks you to the hallway and waits to escort you back.

Need another round?  Ray puts his hand on your lower back and gently ushers you there and back, and he lays down a crisp $20 to pay for it.

One of those fucking assholes eyeing you up?  He doesn’t get the message.  He keeps trying to sidle up to you, chat you up…

…until Ray wraps an arm around your shoulders and pulls you in tight to him. 

It’s purely protective, and it raises an indistinct ache between your thighs to be held like this.  From no touch at all to this, Ray’s solid body shielding you, the clean scent of his body wash in your nose.

The night ends in another ride home from Ray. 

You’re tipsy, and this time?  He walks you to your door instead of staying in his car, but he doesn’t come in when you invite him.

“Next time,” he tells you.  “Be sure to drink lots of water.  Maybe take an ibuprofen before you go to sleep.”

He must see the blatant disappointment on your face, because he gives that small smile, then hooks a finger under your chin. 

He tilts your face up to him, and he bends his head to kiss you—the gentlest, softest brush of his lips against the corner of your mouth.

“Next time,” he repeats, and even though your head is spinning at even the tamest of kisses, it sounds like a promise.

[creamsiclemelt]

not sure what type of prompts u wanted but maybe natejo where the team realizes jo is their solution to how angry nate gets

(or if u need smtg more specific and more ur beat in terms of freaky, natejo cockwarming ◡̈)

I decided to combine both of your prompts anon! Enjoy!

///

Jo is a nice guy. He’s always quick to smile, and is a hell of a hockey player. 

But if you ask Mikko, maybe the best part of having him here, above everything else, is how he has a handle on Mack. Mikko’s never seen anyone outside of Gabe know how to talk Nate down when he’s worked up. 

Jo, though, blows even Gabe out of the water in Nate-handling-skills. Mikko’s seen Jo happily step in between Nate and the target of his ire more than once, has seen Jo go over and make Nate crack a smile when he’s got That One Look on his face. Within the first two weeks of the season, Mikko already knows just how valuable he’s going to be strictly for that alone. 

Still, when Nate accidentally bats the puck into their own net in the last minute of a one-goal game, Mikko knows that the nice dinner out the boys had planned is about to be a whole lot less relaxing than they had hoped for. Either Nate’s not coming—which seems unlikely because Jo’s coming—or he will, and be snappy and irritable when he’s not trying to talk hockey with whoever’s caught next to him. Not to mention what he’s going to be like at practice tomorrow. 

He doubts any amount of Jo talking to Nate or trying to make him laugh is going to change that. 

Mikko stays and does a post-game TV interview right after the game and hopes idly that maybe Nate will have the worst of his anger out by the time he makes it back to the room. 

He’s not exactly optimistic as he approaches the locker room and hears the dead silence coming from it. When he opens the door, he’s expecting some kind of—well. He doesn’t know what he’s expecting. But it isn’t what he finds.

Because Nate’s sitting in his stall, slumped like the picture of relaxation, with his legs spread wide. And in between his knees, there’s a dark head of hair.

It doesn’t take a genius to figure out who it is, but when Mikko cautiously approaches his stall, situated right next to Nate’s, he finds himself blinking down at Jo, eyes caught on the way his mouth is being stretched open by Nate’s cock. 

Jo’s eyes flick over to his, and although Mikko can see his face getting pink, he doesn’t try to pull away, just blinks once, twice, and then shuts his eyes. 

“Thank you, baby,” Nate says, his voice husky and maybe the calmest Mikko’s ever heard him sound after a loss like that. “You’re doing such a good job.” 

Then he looks up, glances around the room until he sees a member of the staff, standing in place, just as frozen as everyone else. “Can you guys do post-game interviews somewhere else?” he asks. 

And, well—

It’s a small price to pay in exchange for a content, calm Nate, all things considered.