#everyone in my physics class has shitty and writing

[birchbow]

i really like everything you've done with the concept of troll gender in pof, but i was wondering if you've given thought to why/how they developed the concept of gender as a not really sexually dimorphic species? and who exactly assigns them genders as wrigglers? like are they getting the concept from the lusii? also i was wondering how they can tell each other's genders without asking directly. i know the clowns indicate that with their paint usually, but what about everyone else? i would love to hear any thoughts you have about this!

Okay so. This is only somewhat represented in the actual fic, mostly because I started writing it more than a decade ago when I was a little weenie with no gender imagination, but the grand scope of the xeno loadout I'm contemplating is thus:

in the same way that Lord of the Rings was theoretically a localized+translated legend from another language. PoF is a translation of a troll society that is in some ways localized by its translator (me lol).

THIS IS TO SAY: gender isn't gender. Pronouns are a self-declaration of "the role I take in my use to the Great Hive of The Empire". Trolls we translate as "male" and "female" are just roles of Use To The Hive that a human translator maps to "he" and "she".

If the mother grub, the drones and the trolls are all the same species, I find it delightful to imagine that insofar as trolls have a physical sex, it's BEING "trolls"; "troll"="the farmed ones/caretakers/(trollspecies) servant class" who provide and care for the mother grub.

Some of said class focus more into social violence not intended to kill+loud and posturing to drive away enemies+big emotions for Care About Hive. Because humans are, to quote troll xenonecroscholars, "obsessed with assigning mammal genital configurations to things", humans have dictated these trolls are "men". Some trolls focus more energy into stronger psionics+no patience for posturing/straight for the kill+hone and reinforce the inner strata of the hive. Humans refer to these individuals as "women".

I'll be shorthanding these roles as "masc" and "femme" because I use way too many words already, but just know that's an oversimplification haha.

FIG 1: Karkat by this standard? Very masc, but his insistence that he wants to be the leader/in charge is idiosyncratically femme of him. *cishet bioessentialism voice* Football player repeatedly goes out for ballet.

FIG 2: let's be clear Karkat telling Tavros to "stop playing games for girls" after he got jumped off a cliff was Karkat/Homestuck being classic 2010s shitty. But it doubles in this as "you decided to play with the Scourge Sisters (Deadly High Femme), you moron, you're lucky you're not dead".

how people figure out which one they initially go by... tbh it seems like schooling is pretty much via computers. I feel like you could easily just get like. A module on reproduction, and then a module that's essentially a fucking. quizilla quiz. Assigned pronouns at government-required school module.

Recent chapters have started making characters 'they/them' until the POV character gets a hint what their preference is--in this theoretical setup there would be quite a lot of sussing it out. "Gender presentation" would be a loose constellation of traits with a lot less certainty! The webcomic was not made with this in mind but I do find it fun to willfully reframe the pretty generically human-gendered characters we get.

FOR EXAMPLE!! Long/big hair as a peacocking flair/brag, often by old or powerful classes, or people who are powerful enough psionics they don't have to give a shit about a very grabbable liability in a fight. Trolls whose vocational pronouns translate as "female" often specialize in straightforward impersonal murder and social engineering more than brawling, so longer hair wouldn't be a liability and therefore is correlated, but only loosely.

Feferi has long hair, but so does the Grand Highblood. Equius (reads quite masc to humans) has long hair (nobility fle%), but Kanaya (the most overtly human femme) does not (practical middle-class brawler)! I don't think that's on purpose but I AM taking advantage of it lol.

'They/them' is the equivalent of the "joker" title I made up already for Clown Church--somebody with multiple skillsets, mixed roles, or fields of influence. My gender is undeclared college major. My gender is Jack Of All Trades.

Verato's transness isn't really about his switch from one gender to another--it's more because he plays a "femme" role in society but uses the "masc" pronoun for himself. His self-consciousness about it is more similar to a nonbinary or bisexual human who's used to being told to "pick one" and being told which one they "seem like" or "should be".

Meanwhile the Behemoth's 'it/its' in English stands out as a pronoun usually used for objects, but in Alternian it would be the pronoun trolls use to refer to DRONES. "(Trollspecies) made for thoughtless violence/enforcer/culls the weak". Chilling!!

I would have to go through and edit huge chunks of the fic to drag all half a million words into line with fun xeno shit alongside the clown church worldbuilding I already got in there, but damn if the concept isn't tempting some days.

[calamity-bean]

I feel shitty even writing about other people this way, but it's built up to the point that I GOTTA vent:

People have GOT to learn to wash their fucking asses and brush their fucking teeth before they come to a partner dance class.

I honestly can't believe this happens frequently enough for me to complain about. I can't believe how often I have to grit my teeth and hold my breath while trying to waltz or whatever with a partner who reeks so bad I find myself wondering whether they have actually, literally shat their pants.

I'm not talking about sweat-smell, either. Dance is a physical activity; people sweat. That's fine. I know what sweat smells like. I certainly am not gonna hold it against anyone to start sweating while dancing.

But I'm not talking about sweat. I'm not talking about the faintest whiff of BO, or about anyone who usually smells fine but maybe has an off day now and then. I'm talking about people who show up to class and are consistently preceded through the door by the sour reek of week-old BO or musty clothes that haven't been washed in a year. I'm talking about people whose hair and clothes and pores are so infused with gross skunky weed or shitty cigarette smoke that I can hardly bear to get within five feet of them, much less in a ballroom close hold. And, perhaps worst of all, I'm talking about getting absolutely FETID GARBAGE BREATH constantly puffed in my face from mere inches away.

I feel like I'm going insane!!!!! I can't be the only one bothered by this, right???? The other people in my class must notice this too???? And we're all just too polite to mention it to each other???? I don't even have a very keen sense of smell!

There are certain people I straight-up dread seeing come into the studio, not because of anything to do with their skill level or personality but because they consistently smell absolutely abominable. We all rotate partners throughout class, so I spend the entire time dreeeading seeing them come to me in rotation again. And I hate feeling this way. I love dance, I want everyone to love dance, I want more people to join dance and I don't want anyone to feel like they're not welcome in class. But I find myself becoming terse and standoffish with these partners because 100% of my self-control is being devoted to forcing myself to keep a straight face while I choke on their rancid musk.

Like. Holy shit. Partner dancing is... maybe not what we ordinarily think of when we hear "contact sport," but it is, literally, a contact sport. A very very CLOSE contact sport. You are, at farthest, within arm's reach of your partner the entire time. I do NOT think it's unreasonable to expect a baseline level of hygiene from people who want to participate in an activity that inherently requires you to spend the entire time touching each other and sharing personal space.

Well. If nothing else, it's made ME absolutely militant about making sure I always wash my own body and brush my own teeth before class. Like hell am I gonna subject anyone else to that.

[spaloonbabooguuscooties]

i think yeah, if nina's gonna stay a "villain", the megamind thing is a decent fit. i could also just as easily accept an interpetation that, the villainy thing is almost more like. a hobby? like she does it just, as a fun thing to do with crash and coco and co., despite any protests. like they have a big battle till the machine of the week explodes, and nina goes "good job guys, same time next week :)", and assumedly coco is like "nina uh, could you actually not, maybe? nina?"

pairing this with the other ask (that im Assuming is also from you LOL but idk) just so i can get my full thoughts out, which are au,mm a lot . and apologies if they arent written especially well i do kind of think of these things as i write them so. be excited for run on sentences and a bunch of bullshit parenthesis

but see i get your complaint here. i know there's a disconnect from like, twinsanity where shes entirely mute to tag team racing where she DOES talk, and then to crash of the titans/mind over mutant they definitely all feel like slightly different characters. (not to mention the spyro/crash game she was first introduced in where she sounds like shes like 8 or something LMAO)

personally i enjoy her character in tag team racing the most but thats because she has SO much dialogue in it i think that it actually gives you a good sense of personality. but i also think that coco is the best personality wise in that game for the same reason so . (not that i think all of the characters in ttr are uhh. great🫩 but nina and coco def shine for me)

idk i also think tag team is good for her because it feels like it could fit most in line with her like lackadaisical attitude from twinsanity i can definitely see her still skipping around and like. having a good time. shes overdramatic and confident and funny. a little snotty but i like herrr ... i like her lil ugly ass❤️ shes shot two people ect

THAT BEING SAID . idk! i feel like i can give a pass for COT/MOM nina acting a little different (i honestly dont even think its That different from ttr but there isnt a lot of time to really see how she acts . because its not a good game heart) because it feels like shes older in those games and so i feel like (at least how i interpret this change in character but i doubt they thought about it this hard) its less that they went with how she looks and more like i can just See her being less silly and more sneering and brooding over time? like especially if you take the shit cortex does at face value and hes genuinely shitty to her along with him being her only (LIVING. BY THE WAY. LIKE IM PRETTY SURE HE KILLED HER PARENTS? IS THAT NOT THE IMPLICATION? not that i think she KNOWS that) family i can see Why shed loose her smile and whimsy and joy as she gets older and starts internalizing that. idk! i know people hate the titans games (Understandable . I Get It) but i actually like a lot of the plot threads brought up for her too. her doing well in madam amberlies and being the top of the class is good to me and it would make sense that you could interpret her being put in evil public school that after cortex kind of . attacks the head mistress in twinsanity gets her kicked out and after he gets tired of dealing with her in COT she gets sent there instead . so theres another thing hes ruined for her yknow. of course shes pissed off and hates her life now shes getting swirlies and physically attacked every day and she Sucks and everyone hates her . and its FUNNY. I LIKE IT.

and i think that whole having her life ruined over and over could lend well to her becoming a good guy sure but i also think it lends really well into her feeling the need to Really be better than cortex as a villain. because shes canonically smarter than him already anyway i think being able to succeed him while being 'evil' in her Own way (and not the way hes trying to force her to be) would be important to her. i think she values the control that taking over the world would give her as well since shes never had that before! shes had every choice she could make ripped away from her just like her stupid hands. imo, i think she deserves to go crazier actually.

which isnt even to say i dont think she could become good eventually. i think once she gets her turn to be an actual villain instead of an asset and gets it out of her system with coco and crash and everyone she could kind of learn to Settle and be a little more normal.

my base thing with all this here is that i think if she is redeemed it has to be gradual imo. because cortex has been there her whole Life. hes hurt her and manipulated her in that more insidious way that he hasnt Done to the other mutants like crunch, and thats where shes different. she doesnt have the luxury of breaking out of containment from a lab or something because as far as shes aware cortex is all shes got! so her becoming more angry and stuff at her situation and kind of eventually realizing shes being used while also being Raised to be a bad person still i think is going to have a bad impact on how she moves forward before it evolves into her realizing she Can be a good person and be loved like that.

because! you know! she doesnt and has never had friends so she doesnt know what THATS like. has probably not been hugged enough as a kid bc i knowww cortex is conditional as fuck with his love (if you can even call the few times hes nice to her love) and even when he Does say hes proud of her for the evil things she does shes STILL punished for it which is in turn going to make her think she isnt good enough and overcompensate for it. he literally took her hands bc he didnt like that she got to feel joy from petting animals . she cant touch anyone without physically hurting them. so like theres noo way she isnt going to develop severe trust issues on top of that.

and this is just under the assumption that the bandicoots are treating her normally from the jump and are wholly Good and nice . bc personally i liked the weird one sided rivalry thing that coco has with her in ttr also where coco is like fuucking obsessed with her for no reason and is constantly trying to beat her. and i dont think coco IS a good person in the same unconditional way crash is (but i can get into that later) so i think itd take a lot of time for coco to want to open her arms and give nina the opportunity to change . and see that shes more than a villain trying to kill them? especially because for the most part i dont think nina would be willing to show that kind of vulnerability to her outside of extreme duress. LMAO.

THIS ALL BEING SAID of course this is also the less silly fun way of seeing these characters and more me taking everything too seriously i guess. and i DO want nina to have fun still ofc . i do see her interactions with coco and the others even when shes fighting them as like the singular positive thing going on in her life so i think she seeks it out a lot! because its banter and something physical to focus her energy on and even tho theyre on opposite sides shes being treated like an equal for once which is really good for her. its just that she assumes that the only way to Get that kind of treatment is to Keep Being Evil. which is also fun for her anyway like she clearly Enjoys being a bit of a menace even back in twinsanity so.

not that any of this even matters because It's About Time retconned all of it❤️❤️❤️❤️🤪 but whatever that 5th game is never getting made so i have no gods or masters . take my 200 paragraph nonsense slop

[bibibbon]

Wait, did Hori completely skip over their second and third year at UA? Or is the graduation talking about a different year?

Love how there's still absolutely ZERO introspection from anybody about the war, what drove Aoyama's parents to force him into being the traitor, Tokoyami and Izuku possibly being Quirkless, or Aizawa being such a shitty teacher that he never noticed the UA traitor being one of his own students.

And Shinsou can go kick rocks. I've never liked him since I learned how pervasive Fanon!Shinsou is in the fandom, and seeing his Goob from Meet The Robinsons ass being rewarded for his victim mentality really irks me. Again, love how Aizawa supposedly hates favoritism despite turning around and favoring Shinsou (and Bakugou).

#BringIzuku'sFluffyHairBack

Hi @nutzgunray-lvt 👋

No hori didn't completely skip over 1A's seconds and third year. The time skip was only a few days (which bugs me even more) so I was talking about mirio and his classes graduation. Personally I feel like it's too early to do such a thing but I mind of see it as hori making a full circle moment with what he mentioned in the war arc.

Oh my Iam so mad that there is no and I mean NO INTROSPECTION about what everyone or anyone just went through!??!?! Like y'all just went through a whole war and there is nothing acknowledging that!!!! Heck not even last chapters hospital scene made an effort in acknowledging what went down. The only type of acknowledgement we get is mirio's speech talking about how the heroes are trying hard to go back to square one and how they know there is a lot of work cut out for them but other than that complete radio silence which is weird as hell.

I mean we have seen people die in that war arc, many suffered injuries or lost things, many are probably mentally or physically scarred or both and hori opening no acknowledgement to that and trying to go back to normal is just horrible writing. The fact that it's been a few days since the war and they're going back to school is horrible in itself.

The series in itself doesn't even bother to mention aizawas faults as a character or teacher. Look I got into MHA because of the fanon promise of dadzawa (so Iam bias and have a soft spot for it) but dam horis writing of aizawa is such a let down to what fics and friends have told me about dadzawa. Also it's such a shame that aizawa apologises to izuku mid battle using his first name btw and then we are never brought back to that moment it's simply a one off. Also the simple lack of intropsection and information coming from every character is seriously annoying me it's like I can tell that they're simply puppets that hori is horribly controlling.

Also yuuga deserves better I have talked about how I wanted hori to use the idea of transfer students and students dropping out but this was unsatisfactory. Iam not saying that yuuga shouldn't of dropped out but Iam saying that there was no point considering that he went through that whole ordeal saying that if he fights that the education system may overlook his treachery but now he is leaving?!?!?!?

I like the potential that shinsou had but in all honesty he is way too underdeveloped for anything. There hasn't been any acknowledgements of his own mistakes and flawed ideology, we never see his interaction with Izuku and him learning that izuku isnt privileged, we don't see him apologising to ojiro for insulting him, we don't see him actually warming up to 1A rather he seems to be happier in his own class. I have talked more about shinsou and what he could of been here

Honestly it never made sense to me why aizawa likes bakugo so much when bakugo is like a carbon copy of his childhood bully so🤷‍♀️. Shinsou I kinda get but dam it's not a good look for sure.

#BRINGIZUKUSFLUFFYHAIRBACK

Horikoshi has no reason to take away Izuku's fluffy hair!! I need it to comeback and I beg for him not to give izuku a disgusting undercut like those aged up fan arts do. Also best Izuku is MHA 411 izuku!!!

[moonyssmommyy]

My Marauders Headcanons Pt. 3 ~ Remus John Lupin

(Daniel Sharman as Remus Lupin makes sooo much sense, in my head. I mean he is soggy, wet dog of a man like Remus. He plays a werewolf on Teen Wolf. He has the hair, and if cocky, cool Remus is your thing he can pull that off too. Also there's a pic of him in a cowboy hat for all the Cowboy!Remus going on rn)

Hes an old man at heart and he always has been

He's very awkward, like if it weren't for the marauders he'd probably have like no friends

He actually gets along with everybody despite the facts he's awkward as hell

Became friends with The Pantheons/Slytherin Skittles/The Emeralds (whatever your preferred term is) after the prank

Light Academia aesthetic

He looks so funny sitting there wearing his light clothes next to them in all their dark ones

Still as cute as ever

He is not the smartest marauder

I mean in book sense yes but absolutely nothing else

He's awkward as fuck, and he's about as creative as a piece of cardboard

He's not emotionally intelligent either he gets even more awkward when people start crying

He has some psychological/ mental intelligence but not much

He's become best friends with Evan and Regulus

Barty reminds him a lot of James and he's thankful for that because he really missed James

He didn't talk to Sirius for months after the prank

Didn't talk to James either as he was on Sirius' side

Remus had expected it but it still hurt

Peter was there though and he'll forever be grateful for that

When he finally did start talking to James again it was like nothing had ever happened, but when he started talking to Sirius again everything was different

Remus' words were calloused, and cold he hadn't called Sirius padfoot or pads since the prank

Sirius hated that

Hated Snape even more after the prank too

His favorite color is actually brown, he says it's green to seem less boring but that's actually his second favorite color

Smokes Marlboro Light 100s

Fav class is Astronomy but best class is DADA

He's thoughtful and very, very observant

His fav muggle candy is Mr. Goodbar's

Tried on Sirius' leather jacket once and wants to get one of his own now

Really enjoys being the little spoon but he's so tall (that's why Barty is a good snuggle buddy)

Love Languages are Quality Time and physical touch

He prefers to receive physical touch and just spend time with you bc he doesn't really know how else to express himself

Mama's boy just like James

But he really loves his dad too

He fucking loves dinosaurs

So does Peter, they can talk about them for hours

Remus and Peter are variants of each other

Remus is a nerd from hell 😭

It's ok he's cute tho

Remus is naturally left handed but he learned to write with his right hand bc writing of the superstition that surrounds it

James and McGonagall are the only ones who know

So everyone thinks Remus has super shitty handwriting, when it's actually really good

He writes very small and neat

Didn't actually make up with Sirius until there were only a couple months left in their last year

[your-fave-has-munchausen]

JUST GONNA SAY THAT as a munchie and a cripple i am so so so over people that talk about Fakers and Finding Fakers because literally all it does is make real disabled people fall under intense scrutiny only to get disbelieved if their lived experience deviates even a single fucking bit from the Standard Medical Description of what the disability is. like if u want to be a real ally to disabled people both physical and mental can you shut the fuck up about fakers forever. please.

and thats not even getting into like-- okay. being disabled is really fucking inconvenient and expensive. if someone is risking permanent wrist and shoulder damage using a shitty hospital wheelchair because They're Faking It, there HAS to be something really serious wrong for them to risk that, not even getting into the inconvenience of having to maneuver around people and too-tight aisles and no curb cuts and getting the damn thing in and out of the car, like... CLEARLY SOMETHING IS WRONG ENOUGH FOR THEM TO GO TO SUCH LENGTHS LIKE HELLO? like no one just fakes a disability for fun and even if someone did, who gives a fucking shit. literally who cares. """""ohhouhbhbbutbut theyre faking a disabiwity--""" trolls have existed since the dawn of civilization. if it's a rare case of bad faith literally just don't give them the time of day its literally that goddamn simple

like if someone is Faking A Disability then oftentimes there's a pretty big goddamn thing wrong for them to go thru all that just to get some care and/or attention from others. like can we please maybe have a bit of compassion for our fellow fucking man instead of honing on Disability Fakers because you're all bullies that want a justified target to go after so you can still be morally in the clear?

my honest to god real opinion is if you work minimum wage you can and should fake a disability. all that fucking standing for AT LEAST eight hours a day will fuck your legs up and probably like, actually give you a real disability. being disabled and in pain sucks. having to deal with painkiller restrictions suck. MAKE them make you sit. come with the chair. i just showed up in a wheelchair before my formal diagnosis (WHICH I HAVE. SHUT THE FUCK UP) and my job didnt question it because they have never not seen me in it. show up to the interview with it. they didn't ask for proof or whatever and even then just find a dr feelgood or fake that shit. lie to your employers. don't let them steal your health from you and ESPECIALLY NOT FOR *THAT* FUCKING PRICE, MINIMUM WAGE AINT WORTH THE RISK OF PERMANENT DAMAGE. who even gives a shit anymore. in my eyes it's not malicious if it's to prevent your boss overworking your body to the point that you will develop a real disability for real. is it faking to take medicine preventatively? didn't fucking think so. this is my manifesto. GO FORTH AND JUST FUCKING LIE TO PEOPLE THAT WILL USE ANY EXCUSE TO TAKE EVERYTHING FROM YOU. DO IT. DO IT!!!

🏝

Hello again Jabberwock you are so real for that! Like, Munchausen and shit aside, the overall environment for the working class is so goddamn hostile like I get the sentiment that even for people who aren't already disabled, it's like... You're GONNA be at the rate service and manual labor breaks you.

So now it's this double-ended thing where it's like man! Why must there be so much hostility over "faking" disability when everyone's being treated like shit already? What do you want, a medal? For contributing to the panopticon? Be serious.

Then then intersectionality when you do factor in Munchausen is unreal. What, are we just incapable of being sick for real now? Or disabled? And even for those who do, it's like... You're right, there's so much effort and expense to put into it like if you're gonna commit to the bit there has to be a damn good reason underneath it all. Can we approach that from a good faith perspective in which we try to find the underlying issue and acknowledge that, maybe? Instead of writing everyone off ever as inherently malicious?

Can we PLEASE get out of the panopticon??? Why is everyone playing disability like it's a class trial out of Danganronpa like I lowkey highkey don't understand.

[snnynaturalarch]

feel free to ignore this! this is just for me to have space to just type shit out.

these months have been so rough that i feel like i'm hitting a breaking point. i have no money. school has been taking over my mental and physical health to the point i have been eating like shit, losing my hair, unable to work out, unable to sleep. people in my life trying to tell me what i should do and adding onto that stress. constantly reminding me all the shit going wrong, i don't need to fucking hear it cause i already know.

my sister is flying back into town next month after not seeing her since thanksgiving since she moved away. i was excited for it and we planned separate days to hang out with four of our cousins. two of our cousins (they're sisters) on one day, then the other two on another day. and now it's changed so that we're all together and that is giving me ANXIETY. dynamics change when we're all together because it's a "who has a better life than who" "who has more money" "who has more luxury" "who has the better love life" kind of deal and i'm usually quiet or out of the conversations because i just don't want to be a part of that mess and then they go ahead and criticize me for everything, and it has been the way for me for YEARS. then one of them has this whole weird shit where she keeps trying to set me up with her EX BOYFRIEND. even when they were together, she tried pulling that shit and i would constantly be like ????? what the fuck?? anyways, i'm dreading that.

not to mention, as of lately, my parents have been fighting way more than usual and my mom making me her outlet for it all. basically i'm becoming everyone's outlet, but that is my fault because my personality type (and being an eldest daughter) i take everyone's burden so they won't have to deal with shit.

this would be a good time to have money and to go back to therapy. i had 5 panic attacks in a row in one day last month. and constant anxiety attacks almost every week now. i just want these last two weeks to be over so i can finally breathe over one thing. dumb thing is, i didn't even start classes for myself. it was for my parents who kept fucking nagging me because of my career choice. i haven't been doing anything for myself and i'm struggling to balance that shit. not to mention my shitty mental health has been radiating over here where it's supposed to be a fun hobby and safe space.

i constantly get the fear of stepping on people's toes, being too much, saying the wrong thing, doing the wrong thing, feeling like a paranoid bitch and constantly looking over my shoulder, having major trust issues. and for what? i don't even fucking know. it's all just me and my head. everything is just piling up and i am just so fucking over this shit.

i miss writing and editing like it's no one's business and me not overthinking everything.

anyway a bitch is tired

i'm lumi and you're watching disney channel dudDUdududduduDududuN neat

[nithica]

i want to write something about/to my friend so here i go. warning: don’t read, shit’s long as fuck

i was just thinking about this after going out last night, and maybe one day i will write this in other words (….and our mother tongue lol) for her to read but right now, i don’t know how she’d react to it (circumstances), so i wanted to at least put it down here.

anyway, this is a friendship that i hold so dearly close to me. it’s not perfect. we are not the kind of friends you see attached to the hip everywhere, or that are always out doing fun things, or having funny conversations every day. in fact, for best friends, i suppose we really barely talk to each other at all. there are times when we don’t speak for a month or sometimes we just check in every few days. some people might find that unusual, or try to deny that we are best friends. i have noticed over the years that people love to dictate other people’s relationships together. friendships are supposed to be that way, romantic relationships are supposed to be this way, and if you don’t conform to how they would do it, how could you be best friends, really?

but when i think of the term “best friend”, i have no other choice than to think of her. my dearest friend, whom has been by my side since we were aged 12—friendship going on 16 years now—who has seen every side of me there possibly could be seen, who has been around for almost all of my major life events, who has cried with me, laughed with me, judged me when i needed to be judged, and who in countless situations has proven that our trust is mutual and deeply rooted.

no, we are far from perfect together. neither of us has our shit together, really. our beliefs don’t really align on that many fronts, either. i am the grounded one, the rational one (lol, what a joke), the introvert, the one everyone gets intimidated by. she is the spiritual one, free-spirited and extroverted to a T, the spontaneous one, the one who always forces me out of my shell anyway even when i want to do nothing more than to hide.

we have been through SO much together. we had shitty childhoods. even shittier teens. and while i was more controlled, we were fucked up together. we have done many things we regret now. irresponsible things like drinking vodka in an alley behind our high school during breaks, getting to class high as a kite, skip class to go with sketchy adult creeps, and far sketchier things that i’ll just not get into. i was there when she got into physical fights with teachers and other students, and when she ran away from home for the umpteenth time and her parents called me, i would foolishly cover for her, loyal as a dog, knowing very well she was probably off with someone. we were polar opposites in a sense; she very expressive with her mental struggles and me, who looked like i got everything together, suffering in silence while everything around me fell apart.

still, through all that misery, i knew i had her to count on and she knew she could always come to me. she does. and i’m so grateful for that, that she feels like i’m not only worthy of her time but also someone she can turn to when she needs to. i don’t pass judgement, even if i do sometimes have opinions on what she’s done, but it’s not my place to judge. plenty of people judge us already. i feel honoured, still, 16 years later, when she calls me because she wants my opinion on a situation, because she always turns to me when she wants grounded, neutral input. that’s kind of funny, though; turning to the borderline for such a thing. lol. but i’m honoured regardless.

last summer, when we were at a festival together for five days, we sat in the scorching sun drinking some beers and we got to talking about a time period in which we barely had contact. she had been placed out of her parental home by our country’s equivalent of CPS and i had been, well, struggling with other things.

my dad died, unexpectedly, that winter. i don’t remember much of all the details around it. my mum left almost immediately and i was left alone, abandoned by both parents all of a sudden, in a house too large for a teenager alone and almost a mini farm full of animals to take care of. betrayed by another friend as well, i barely saw anyone for months. this happened 9 years ago, in february 2016. we never really talked about it. it was a painful time for us both.

yet, as we sat there, drinking together surrounded by tents, we were reminiscing our friendship together and she said something that i’ve been unable to stop thinking about since.

“i was mad at you, you know,” she had said, and i was surprised. we’ve never even argued before. what could she possibly have been mad about? “back when your dad passed away. i was so mad at you, because we found out later, and you’d just been suffering by yourself. i wanted to smack some sense into you. you didn’t have to go through all of that alone.”

i was caught off guard, because i’d never considered that.

i may seem open and honest now, but she was right. i internalise everything. i don’t ask for help, and i never stop to think maybe sometimes people want to help me.

why, though? because when i think of my friends, or even random people on random platforms, i want to help. it’s a natural thing to do. there is absolutely no joy in watching others suffer. so isn’t it odd, that i’m familiar with the desire to help, and yet don’t consider someone might feel that way about me?

it took a long time, but i think that was a pivotal moment in my social development. since then, i realised, not only is 15 years of friendship a very long time, but our friendship is also something special. even if we may not speak to each other daily, and even if we do plenty of things by ourselves or with other people. we don’t have a pinterest-type of friendship and that’s okay. we have the best kind of friendship there is, if you ask me. because we can both be utterly and unapologetically ourselves, and there are absolutely no hard feelings, no disappointments, no quarrels at all. we know who we are, and we have accepted that. both of us (i hope, but assume) get what we need and want from this friendship.

so back to last night.

the reason why i’m thinking about it now, is because experiencing this party sober was a whole new experience for me. i was pulled into a situation that was far out of my comfort zone and had nothing to help me gather courage. the upside is that you are so much more aware of everything that happens.

my friend drank, i didn’t mind. she works at these pubs and doesn’t get to enjoy herself often, considering she often works 60+ hour work weeks. she didn’t feel like going alone, so she asked me to come. i’ve cancelled a couple of times already—again, im not the most extroverted person out here—so i thought, well shit, it’s time to pay my dues. we first spent some hours just chatting and catching up at a quiet bar, before her other friend joined and we went to the valentines party.

my friend is gorgeous. not only is she gorgeous, she has this air about her that just pulls people in. people of all ages and all walks of life, it was clear as day. as soon as we walked in, all eyes were on us (read: mainly my friend). she knows just about everyone, and even if she doesn’t know someone, they will know her now. everyone looks at her. everyone seeks just a fraction of her time. she has a shot named after her at the bars now, and even that is selling like fresh pastries.

i don’t think she realises at all just how captivating she is. hopefully someday she will. she has her own hardships. our 20’s have been just as rocky and eventful as our teens, really. i hope things will look up for both of us from here.

but i just feel grateful that someone like her still drags me out with her to social events—begrudgingly from my side, if i may be so honest—and proudly introduces me to everyone as her best friend. and i mean, proudly. i feel like a little elf sometimes, lmfao. people will come up to talk to me and ask, “so you know her through and through, huh?” and then i’ll just giggle to myself and give her a knowing look. oh, do we know each other. you haven’t seen a thing. we really helped scrape each other off the bottom of the barrel and climbed out agonisingly slow. you don’t wanna know.

online, i may fail miserably at being “mysterious”. in real life its the total opposite. i am mysterious. i don’t know if people are interested in me because im friends with her, or because im like an spectre that comes out of the woodworks every few months to be the most quiet person at the entire event ever, but they always end up asking about me anyway lol.

yesterday, as i went home, i heard them ask after me. my friend, drunk and loud, answering, “oh that’s sjon. my best friend in the whole world.” lol. i’m sure these people wonder how one of the most widely loved and known people in town is ‘best friends’ with someone they never see or hear of in the two and a half decades that i’ve been here, but i think it’s hilarious.

we really are just polar opposites, and i just adore her. i’ll gladly guide her drunk ass through the crowd, ward off any creeps or hold her hair when she’s feeling sick. i gladly walk back to the grocery store—which i’ve just been to—to pick up some dinner for her because her forgetful ass forgot to bring some to work. i’ll gladly deal with feeling a little squirmy as at least five pairs of eyes blatantly stare at me, wondering who that mysterious person with the town’s social butterfly is. i know that, at the end of the day, if i need her for something, she will be there. if i have things to say, she will listen. the day when im finally ready to be open about my traumas and mental illness, she will be there for me.

i just feel so lucky to have this kind of friendship, this kind of person in my life. i adore her with everything i’ve got. i wish she could see herself through my eyes. maybe someday she will. hopefully, she will be careful with herself and learn to love herself more. just as i try. life may be rocky, but we got each other’s backs. and i feel so, so proud to be able to call myself her friend. life is just that much more bearable knowing i have people like her in my life.

and of course, that goes for my online friends as well. 🥰 i feel bad, often. being friends with a borderline isn’t easy. or being friends with me specifically just isn’t easy. i have terrible mood swings and i can be really ugly. i can go m.i.a. or be overwhelmingly present. i’m naturally mentally unstable and that’s not always fun to witness.

honestly, i’m not sure i have lots to offer as a friend. but one thing i do have to give you, is my loyalty. i’m like a weed. spreads fast, irritatingly difficult to get rid of. if you’re already here, i’ve got some bad news for you!!! you’re not getting rid of me easily. better buckle up buddy. you’re in it for the long haul. 🥰🥰🥰

was there a point to all this….? no. i just wanted to gush about something dear to me. hehe!

[kaiserkisser]

you 🫵 my dear i heard you were quite upset about your marks and that it soiled your day recently (sickness is gettingnto me i sincerely apologize for not remembering the date💀) but i came here to remind you around(?) dinnertime when youll see it that you are GENUINELY the smartest person i know. and im like rank 11 in my class idk i dont actually check point is IM QUALIFIED TO SAY THIS OK! you worked so hard and ill say this time and time again but i truly know in my heart that there are some tests and some papers that are out to GET YOU, and you did everything in your capacity to get the highest marks you could. and its okay that you didnt get what you wanted!! you take what you did wrong and you learn from it, but you never. and i mean. never. skylia. NEVER again am i gonna hear that youre dumb or failing or something of that vein that indicates you didnt try because i know you did, gorgeous. and i know you did a damn good job doing it

academics are one of those things that you have to learn to be okay with falling in sometimes because it gives you wiggle room to improve your work. ive also seen that youre taking ORGANIC CHEM?????? bro i GRADUATE this year and i took organic chem and it broke me. ruined my life. you are a BEAST for even taking that and doing well in it?? honey youre already there. i sincerely wish your parents saw this but along with a lot of other parents with high expectations (mine included) its literally physically incapable for them to even have a little bit of grace surrounding this but. i digress. lia you are doing the best you can and you cant beat yourself up for this!!! i truly believe in you pretty girl youre gonna do amazing things and youre gonna grow and write better papers but youre doing everything you can with how stressed you are, you deserve a break, or atleast a breather. youre doing amazing hon i dont wanna hear you say otherwise ever again🙁🫵 i love you very much youre too smart to waste time thinking about what couldve gone better when it isnt in your control anymore

UH HELLO????? NOAH?????? HOLY SHIT YOU ACTUALLY TOOK THE TIME TO TYPE OUT ALL OF THAT HSKAJSHSJSJSN OH MY GOSH i was SO tempted to just let this stay in my inbox forever oh my god how are you so sweet and caring wtf i have literally reread this like ten times seems like everyone today is dead set on making me cry /vvpos

i was actually vv upset abt a few subjects coz thats like the lowest ever but like NO ome has gotten good marks so like its fine..... ill do better next time for sure :3 (oof dont apologise i hope youve been taking care of yourself :(((( ] OFC UR QUALIFIED EHEHE and youre absolutely right actually!!! its been unuversally acknowledged atp that the prelim/preboard exams are in all honesty way tougher than the actual boards so i kinda knew it was gonna be shitty but still ehhh comparatively i HAVE done okay! oh my gosh noahie 😭😭😭 okay okay mister ill try to never say anything like that again and if i think of it ill remember what you said and shoo the thoughts away 🙁🙁

you do have a point tho! im gonna like microanalyse everything i did wrong so i dont get stuff wrong next time :333 AND HELP SJSHSU actually we dont have a CHOICE :(((( we have ten compulsory subjects till 10th and in chem we have compulsory organic by default and im taking pcm after this so ill never get rid of organic :( so like rn we only have basics djshsh but its better than learning how to prepare compunds :((( gosh i agree so much and i love you SO much too holy shit thank you so SO much noah for taking the time to write all this it genuinely means SO MUCH to me it legit made me feel a 100 times better abt this 🙁🙁

[spiffingbeansoup]

If you were able to study harder the phrase really isn’t for you then. I used to use it because I was burnt out from spending hours everyday studying to account for then undiagnosed autism, adhd and a learning disability (which despite being obvious didn’t stop faculty putting me into the top class for that subject because apparently I just wasn’t trying hard enough). And sure I don’t use that term anymore, but that’s because I have actual terms to describe what happened. At the time I used gifted kid burnout to describe severe symptoms, and do my best to manage and understand them. That first stage of accepting you have mental illness and burnout is incredibly difficult, and having an unserious phrase was important for that initial step.

The main characteristic isn’t being able to study harder. Even if you could, working harder isn’t going to solve any problems because the problems aren’t about the amount of effort that’s being put in. I’m glad you were able to, but a lot of people aren’t, and it’s kinda a boomer moment to suggest these issues can be solved by buckling up, buttercup. School systems actively fail their students, regardless of where they sit within the structure. Cause believe me I heard some horror stories from folk who weren’t in the “gifted” streams, and I don’t doubt it was as bad or worse. A lot of the pressure placed upon students compounds on the emotional abuse and pressure their parents already put them through. That’s not to mention the sheer amount of effort it takes to get anywhere from a shitty rural public school, where you don’t get taught to write an essay til year 11. I know a lot of ex “gifted” kids who are struggling to perform academically in uni (or have dropped out from education, uni or high school) because it has a huge physical and mental toll on them, which is only exacerbated after moving out and having additional responsibilities.

I’m not denying that there are people who use this phrase who are like you described, but that’s really not the case for most. Again, I’m glad you were able to study harder and get through things. But it’s unrealistic to assume everyone can. If you really have problems with this phrase then Tumblr does allow you to block and filter these things

this isnt about anything specific but i just wanted to say that as someone who is probably like the definition of "former gifted kid" - if i have to read the fucking phrase former gifted kid one more time in my fucking life itll be too soon..shut the fuck UP ALL OF YOU

[samsspambox]

lUCAS PEARCE HAS THE SHITTIEST HANDWRITING I JUST KNOW IT

most stem people have shitty writhing, that's just how it is. i say this as a stem person lmaoo like look me in the eye and tell me bioengineer lucas pearce is not a stem person i dare you

listen,, the people at the NSB fucking HATE when luke has to turn in some type of paperwork because his writing looks like god damn tilted chicken scratch. the paper is at a 45 degree angle when he writes. it's a nightmare.

like i know technology is a thing and it's 2030 why do we need paper but luke probably has a stylus and writes in his answers. or maybe the NSB really like their paper copies.

agent one, looking through a pile of folders: hey, did agent pierce turn in his paperwork yet?

agent two, smoking a cigarette: god i hope not.

agent one: ??? wHAT???

agent two: you're new here, aren't you?

agent one: yeah, what does that have to do with anything? oh i found it, let's just— oh. i am suddenly jared, 19.

luke probably has to take his time to write shit that is legible. you can look at a paper and find the exact moment luke goes "fuck this i'm tired" and you just see tHE WORDS TILT.

marius, king of pretty notes™️ has gifted luke a printed sticky note machine bc mANS CANNOT READ HIS HANDWRITING FOR SHIT AND IT AGGRAVATES HIM TO NO END.

i feel like luke has a habit of leaving a lot of sticky notes on things just so he remembers the stuff he has to do but sometimes even he can't read his own handwriting. luke only uses the sticky note machine when he leaves notes for others, which is a win for the NXX.

luke realizes that it's a thing tho so whenever he wants to be a little shit™️ he'll just not use the machine. to be fair tho most of the time he uses his tablet to do things. he just likes sticky notes.

[bi-bard]

I Just May Like Some Explanations - Dick Grayson Imagine (HBO's Titans)

Title: I Just May Like Some Explanations

Pairing: Dick Grayson X Reader

Based On: Question...?

Word Count: 1,484 words

Warning(s): mention of abandonment/shitty dad/human experimentation

Summary: (Season 1) Dick shows up on (Y/n)'s doorstep with no warning. (Y/n) hopes that- even after so long- Dick can understand why (Y/n) doesn't welcome him back with open arms.

Author's Note: Fun fact, back in like the seventh grade, I was assigned to rewrite the end of The Giver for an English class. Meaning that my first (or one of my first) piece(s) of fanfiction was technically about one of Brenton Thwaites's characters. Extra funny because Taylor Swift was also in that movie.

MIDNIGHTS - TAYLOR SWIFT WRITING CHALLENGE MASTERLIST

-------------------------

Dick had a lot of nerve showing up at my door with no warning.

That was my first thought.

And then, my attention turned to the girl standing next to him. She had her arms crossed and was clearly uneasy. But whether that was me or just the new situation was up for debate.

"Hey," Dick greeted. "This is Rachel. I thought you could help her."

"Nice apology, Grayson," I replied.

Rachel looked at him, but he kept his eyes focused on me.

I stepped back and let them both in.

"Who are you," Rachel asked.

"You dragged a young kid to my door and didn't tell her who I was?" I looked at Dick again.

"I didn't exactly have time," he tried to explain.

"(Y/n)," I held out a hand to Rachel. She shook it. I watched a look of shock cross her face. "What'd you see?"

"What," she asked, pulling her hand away from mine.

"What did you see just then," I repeated.

"I... I don't know... a... like a surgery room with knives and needles and stuff..."

Dick tried to explain before I could, about to mutter something to her.

"My dad," I cut him off. "He was... into experiments."

I motioned to myself.

Think of a vampire. Not so much a "Twilight" vampire, but a decently scary one. Claws, sharp teeth, eyes that didn't look quite right. Things I had no power over and couldn't quite hide without feeling like everyone could see right through me.

"I'm sorry," she muttered.

"Don't be," I shrugged. "Not your fault. I've accepted it."

She just nodded.

"So... why are you convinced that I'd be so helpful," I looked back to Dick.

"I'm a freak," Rachel jumped in.

"Same," I replied. "What powers did you get stuck with? Besides the memory access."

She hesitated.

"Go sit down," I nodded toward my little dining table. "I'll get you something to eat and drink."

The pair of them sat down and waited as I went around my kitchen. I grabbed some water and a little bag of chips for Rachel. After giving that stuff to them, I plopped into the seat across from her.

"My dad had a fixation with vampires," I started. My goal was to make her more comfortable. To let her know that no one was going to judge her. "The more traditional stuff, for the most part. I got the speed, the strength, the physical... attributes. I just didn't get all the little weaknesses. He thought the wooden stake thing was ridiculous."

There was a pause.

"Oh, I also got the bloodlust. Forgot about that," I pointed out. "I got control over that though."

"How," Rachel asked.

"Self-control work," I shrugged. "Took me years. Had to start with my day-to-day life. Mere exposure to people would drive me crazy. I still can't work in something like an office space without getting a gnawing in my stomach."

She looked to Dick.

"You two are safe," I promised.

Dick just nodded.

"He would know," I smirked a bit. "He's been closer to me than anyone else has."

He just looked at me, but I heard Rachel chuckle. I just shrugged at him. It was true.

"Big emotions were next," I continued. "Anger and fear and adrenaline. I had to learn to calm myself and pull my punches."

She leaned forward on the table a bit. Must've been what most of her trouble was revolving around.

The rest of the day was spent with Rachel talking to me. It was slow at first, but she was opening up. She described moments in her life and what she knew. The last few days of her life had been Hell.

That night, I let her use my bed.

I pulled the door shut and saw Dick by the window. He was looking out at Gotham.

"You can take the couch if you want," I said. He looked at me for a moment. "Rachel's all set and I'll figure something out."

He just nodded, looking back out at the skyline.

"First time you've seen it in a while," I asked as I walked over to stand next to him.

"Since I moved," he replied.

I nodded. "Still with Dawn?"

"(Y/n)-"

"You really expect me not to ask," I looked at him. "You ran for the hills before I got any answers."

"I'm not," he said. "Haven't talked to her since I left."

"Oh, so you just ran from all of your problems?"

"Listen-"

"No, no, I have questions, Dick. Good questions. I deserve more than just excuses or avoidance."

He finally looked back at me.

I don't know what clicked or sunk in, but his face softened as soon as he did.

"What do you want to know," he asked.

"Why'd you leave?"

"Bruce," he answered simply. "I needed to go."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"I'm an idiot," he shrugged. I scoffed. "I didn't want you to feel like you needed to follow me or something. Gotham was your home. You kept talking about finally feeling comfortable. I didn't want to steal that."

"You were a huge part of that, Dick," I muttered.

"I did call myself an idiot for a reason."

There was a pause before I could force the next question out, "Did you love me?"

"Yes."

It was the fastest answer. It didn't have any follow-up explanation or anything.

"Then, why did you sleep with Dawn?"

"Because I'm an idiot," he repeated. "I... I can't make an excuse for it. It was just me being stupid and selfish and... that's all there is to it."

I was surprised that I wasn't still angry. I expected to want to kick him out. Scream, hit... anything really.

But I wasn't.

I almost felt blank. Like my mind couldn't decide how I wanted to react to anything around me.

I looked down for a moment.

"I'm sorry," he added. "For everything. I'm... I'm so sorry."

"Did you... Did you think about me," I muttered. "After you left?"

He walked over to me. I moved to rest my back against the wall next to the door. He stood in front of me.

"All the time," he replied.

I glanced away, my jaw clenching as I thought about all the time that I missed.

"You... You were the first person to make me feel like I didn't need to be ashamed of what had happened to me," I said. "It... It felt like you were running from me. Like I had finally pushed you too far. I... I just-"

Dick pulled me into a hug as my voice trailed off. His hand ran up and down my spine. I slowly hugged him back, letting my eyes shut as I did.

He leaned back a few moments later. He stopped a few inches away from me. I let my eyes truly scan every part of his face. I was actually seeing how he had changed since he had left Gotham. It wasn't much. Just aging. It still made me feel like I had missed out on so much.

I was caught off-guard when Dick pressed his lips to mine. My back was pressed into the wall as he kissed me. Like he was trying to test the waters.

I knew it was a bad idea.

I shouldn't have entertained the kiss.

But I had missed this. I missed feeling something... normal.

So I let him kiss me. And I kissed him back. Slowly. It was all so gentle. Hesitant. We were both so clearly nervous about something. It had been so long since I had felt that little pull from in my chest. The longing. The wanting.

Dick stepped closer as he got more comfortable. My back got pressed a little harder into the wall. That seemed to snap me out of whatever trance I had fallen into.

I turned my head to the side, causing Dick's lips to find my cheek. He leaned his forehead against my head, not pushing me to kiss him again.

"Sorry," he mumbled. "Sorry."

He leaned back fully.

"I... I just can't... I can't jump back into... this," I muttered. "I... I want to help with Rachel, but that's... that's all I can do."

"Okay," he nodded.

I stepped out of the space between him and the wall.

"You should get some rest. I'm... I'm gonna... I don't know. I'll figure something out."

"Please be careful," he called as I walked away.

"Always am," I replied. I paused for a moment before speaking again, "Welcome home, Dick."

He grinned at me. I grinned back before continuing to walk away.

I knew it was going to take time to adjust to being around him again.

But I would be lying if I said that seeing him again didn't give me just a little bit of hope.

That was enough for me... for now, at least.

-------------------------

Navigation Guide

What I Write For

Some Original Characters

[bittrlys]

TDP s4, huh?

THE GOOD

Claudia was on FIRE

Claudia getting actually cool wings unlike Callum's dorky arm wings >>>>>>>>>>>

Terry and Viren's various bonding moments

Terry following a dark path out of love of Claudia as Claudia followed a dark path out of love for Viren ... ZESTY

Terry being down to clown with dark magic

Claudia saying she'll take care of Viren

Viren's "GET A GRIP" lmao

PTSD Viren, his melancholy and uncertainty, etc.

Aaravos blowing a kiss and destroying the mirror, iconic behaviour I will say

Claudia getting to acknowledge the existence of generational trauma even if she's wrong and bad and has no evidence or whatever else the show probably wants us to think

Rex Igneous dragging Thunder even if he's wrong and bad and has no evidence or whatever else the show probably wants us to think

Rayla's new hair

THE BAD

World's most unnecessary time skip

Would it have killed them to write Callum with more maturity and confidence?

Everyone enjoy this charming child ruler who makes guards exert the extra energy to open doors for his frog dog and seems to have done away with almost all of the kingdom's old advisors so he can appoint close personal friends instead

"YOU HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY? SAY IT DIRECTLY TO THE DRAGON THAT CAN BITE YOUR FACE OFF" wow lol

"IDK I have no evidence elves and dragons were shitty to humans" girl what? Even if it wasn't written down (OK) that would mean an oral tradition which I guess we can't have any respect for 😊

"You threatening those gold coins (which I don't even know are real and not a bluff) to get the person threatening to slit my throat to let me go (they refused to bargain with you) was so CRUEL, Claudia." <- normal things for your bf who has been on board with all your other unspeakable crimes to say

If Zubeia is going to be useless (couldn't she have been digging out that door?) and then just show up at the end for deus ex machina reasons, can they just uh. Kill her off? I promise the narrative would improve

Zubeia standing amongst those humans like 🧍 while Ezran talks vaguely of 'hurt feelings' praying nobody says the word 'reparations'

Dragons and drakes are different things. OK. Drakes are more animalistic so it's okay for this insular society to mistreat them despite being ruled by dragons. OK. Why not show the hypocrisy of this by having Zym (whom they acknowledge as a dragon) treated differently? Or would a reminder of Zym's privilege be too much for this show?

(Humans get the boot for killing animals but elves get a pass for treating drakes like that. OK.)

"THE STAFF IS MISSING THE FALLEN STAR IS COMING BACK" what? the staff has been missing for centuries ... humans have had it ... maybe they just want it back ...?

Ezran like let's host this feelings party in a cemetery/sacred place full of tributes to people this dragon's mate killed ... I would have done more than slash a painting let me tell you that!!!

Not nearly enough Aaravos. A more physical avatar of him being in that cocoon would have made way more sense.

THE UGLY

That architect subplot requires it's own sub-points because ???

Has nobody started a cooking fire or lit a candle in this city in the past TWO YEARS? This is the FIRST TIME this has come up?

The man physically assaulted her over this and there's just never any kind of justice for that huh? Almost like humans are second class citizens? Huh ...

Obviously she was disrespectful but it's such a stupid argument because I think most people in this situation would say "Can you do this elsewhere" but they didn't want to spoil their little 'build a temple outside of this place' twist I guess.

(Their culture is this religious and didn't have some kind of temple or area of religious observance built already? OK.)

Every 'good' human in this series has to be so goddamn SUBSERVIENT to the will and whims of the Xadians

Like when they want to set up a comedy gag of Amaya being terrified of being assassinated by her gf's people because of the horrible history between their nations (lol) Amaya is allowed to express believable self-preservation but when it comes time to defend one of her own people she's just like. EH. She did wrong, but be nice to her about it! Pwetty pwease! Sorry us humans are such dummies!!! 🥺🥺🥺

I know she's not a lawyer but how about "Misunderstandings and hurt feelings can grow unexpectedly when two cultures live together, but this woman did not act out of malice, but out of a desire to protect this settlement. Her words and actions were thoughtless, but if thoughtlessness is to be punished, is having THIRD DEGREE BURNS ON HER HANDS not itself a punishment already?" or you know anything but what we got

But don't worry it's okay because her wifey is so benevolent, aren't we lucky to have such BENEVOLENT people in power who are allowed to call for your death for *checks notes* putting out a fire? They won't, and that's what makes them so GREAT, but they could, of course. Of course they could. Don't forget that. Don't forget that they could. I'll make you think I'm about to cut off your fucking hands so you don't forget it!

Anyways, the rest of the worst hits:

Aaravos is literally just Satan. OK.

Just heavy-handed Christian ideology in a series that wants to purport a kind of cross-cultural paganistic worldview

Honestly I don't think 'worldwide mastermind' is a plot concept without merit but it's so boring in this series because they simply do not seem interested in giving him real depth while placing him on the side of the oppressed-but-not-really humans, reinforcing how much the humans are in the wrong, so absolutely nobody benefits from this writing decision

This season took so long to come out because they were reading the arguments from us 5 people who call them out on writing a weirdly pro-imperialism series and then had to stick in a bunch of strawman scenes to be like "Oh you think this but really it's unfair" and then realized they couldn't think of actual counterarguments and eventually had to admit defeat and just have characters they like go "NUH-UH!!" in response

Fans of the show want to say it's 'nuanced' and 'showing both sides' but that doesn't hold water because A) every person that expresses any kind of doubts or cynicism about the status quo is a villain in this series and B) Unless they plan on Uno reversing their whole lore (wouldn't put it past them) these things DID HAPPEN and if Xadians were meant to be meeting humans halfway, there would seriously be a real discussion about allowing humans a place in Xadia and other shit that simply never comes up

Will Zubeia apologize? No! She just compliments the good humans for dancing to her tune. It's simply so one-sided.

Anyways points for Rayla dumping Callum on his birthday LMAO. It seems a bit thoughtless of her but I can't deny the comedy. 👍

[journeyintofiction]

hii, can u do a Shuri x reader where the reader is in college and is getting verbally and physically abused by her parents due to her bad academics performance but she won’t tell Shuri because she has a country to worry about until Shuri eventually finds out because the reader won’t answer calls or texts? <33

Hello everyone! I took a tiny hiatus because I had a very huge loss in my family right before New years so I was not in the mental headspace to write anything. However, I am back and unfortunately the college semester is in full swing. Pls send help im dying 

TRIGGER WARNING: Mentions of verbally and physically abusive parents

Word count:1k

As always, happy reading :) 

“y/n, you better not be crying in your room before I come in there and give you something to cry about!”

I quickly attempt to muffle my sobs by burying my head in my comforter on the bed, hoping and praying that my parents can’t hear me. God knows I don’t need another beating after what happened tonight. 

It always happens like this. Every single time. I do my best, get anything lower than an A and I know as soon as I come home I’m gonna have my ass beat. No matter how hard the class is or how hard I work they don’t care because if it isn’t an A it is considered a failure. I went to the college they wanted me to go to because I could stay home and make money but that meant I couldn’t escape their abuse. 

This semester I had a slip up and got a C in a class and in turn they beat the shit out of me as a form of “teaching me” a lesson. It's not just the physical abuse, every insult was a purposeful stab at me because I failed to meet their expectations or it was just because they had a shitty day and wanted to hurt my feelings. I am at a breaking point mentally, emotionally, and physically.

I hear my phone vibrate and I pick my head up from my comforter to look at my phone and see Shuri’s name pop up on the screen. A smile slightly at the thought of her but wince when I feel the tightness of my skin from my tears drying. I slowly move over to where my phone is so I can text back before she gets worried.

Shuri always knew my schedule and when I suddenly don't answer and she knows I'm at home, she gets worried sick. I shoot her a text and let her know I cant talk and just as I am about to hit send she calls me. Out of fear I quickly answer and start speaking in hushed tones so that my parents dont hear me.

“Shuri, i love you, but right now really isn’t a good time.”

She pauses and asks, “Are you at home?”

“What? Yes I’m at home, you know my routine plus you can track me right now.” I say in confusion.

“My love, I have been trying to call you for the last 2 hours.”

I go silent for a moment and try to figure out how to explain the entire situation without getting Shuri upset or involved with my parents. She takes my silence as a negative response and begins to respond before I can.

“y/n if you have something going on, please just tell me.”

I bite my lip and respond on the verge of tears, “Shuri I want to tell you, I really do but if I say anything… I-”

I get cut off by my mom coming up the stairs and I shove my phone under my pillow but don’t end the call so Shuri can hear everything.

“Who are you talking to up here, huh?”

I look at her impassively so that she believes me, “No one mom, I'm rereading something for my test tomorrow.”

“Yeah, you better be because if I see you come home with another B or less, you are gonna get your ass beat again. I'm not playing with you, your father and I have told you time and time again that we expect you to achieve and you fall short every time.”

I feel my eyes getting watery but otherwise show no emotion and respond as I always do, “of course, I’ll make sure its nothing less than an A.”

My mother looks at me hard and nods, “Keep studying and while you’re at it, dust your room and do laundry.”

With that she leaves to go back down stairs for the night and I pick up my phone from under my pillow. 

“Shuri, are you still there?”

Instead of a reply I get a facetime call and I accept it quickly, frowning at her when she appears on screen. 

“What's wrong? Why did you need to facetime me-”

Shuri looks at me angrily, “How long has this been happening?”

“How long has what been happening?” I say, playing dumb and hoping that she will drop the conversation.

“y/n.”

I sigh, “years, I… never said anything because I know you are busy and this is not your concern and responsibility.”

“All those bruises over the last few months, they were your parents weren’t they?” she whispered.

Looking down and picking at my comforter I mutter a soft “ya.”

She sighed and didn’t say anything for a moment, seemingly unsure of how to broach the subject without hurting me or making me uncomfortable. Then she finally asks, “What else have they…done?”

I hesitate and glance at her on the screen, “It’s just yelling and berating me most of the time but when I get a bad grade they, uh, beat me.”

“Is that why you reacted poorly when I yelled a few weeks back?”

I nod and she looks away from her screen guiltily, “No, Shuri don’t do that to yourself, you didn’t know back then.”

“I should have picked up on it though, I mean seriously the bruises and the flinching whenever my voice was raised should have told me everything I needed to know.”

I see her moving around frantically packing things and I frown because as far as I knew, she didn’t have a meeting and wasn’t expected to go anywhere this evening. When she glances over and sees my confused look she shrugs and raises an eyebrow.

“What?”

“Shuri… what are you doing?” I ask with my head cocked to the side.

“I’m coming to see you… and talk to your parents.”

“YOU'RE WHAT?”

A/N: Please forgive any grammatical errors, I am extremely tired and have had a looonnngggg week. 

[dykeomania]

some things about this college hockey blahblahblab!au that i just personally like because it's actually super nice to write it idk i love this little world i've created i've deadass been thinking about this in flickers since like, last year. don't come for me my perception of college is skewed i go to a liberal arts college anyways

cat is a visual arts major, and is the first person that ellie hooked up with once she got into college. she's an only child and lowkey she would've went to art school or just not go to school at all and start tattooing or something, but college was honestly cheaper than art school and her parents are chill about a lot of things but her dad is some finance dude that actually allows her mom to be an artist so if she didn't go to college she was Lowkey going to get kicked out of the house (that's a dramatization but she literally wouldn't hear the end of it). Anyways. they went to the same prep school and played on the same hockey team, but didn't start to get close until around freshman year of college. this is around the time where cat had started to settle into her own skin a little more and ellie was kind of refinding her footing due to. Events.

ellie broke up with riley at the end of her senior(~) year, because Events and she had a moment and cut her hair to shoulder length because someone on tiktok told her to. it happened over a phone call. riley sounded civil, but ellie could tell things changed from the moment that they were flying back home from vancouver (for a hockey tournament) and riley didn't sit next to her, or even look at her. they're cool, ellie guesses. riley also plays on the same team as ellie. (riley is an anthro/philosophy or gov/philosophy double major (but she probably takes a lot of psych classes) (that's awkward so does ellie) and she makes fun of ellie for saying she's from boston. riley is actually from boston. ellie is a j-o-b (just outside of boston).

ellie's entire friend group from prep school made a pact to commit to the same college and it's extremely messy and extremely rewarding

ellie's technically adopted. she, joel, tommy, and maria all live together in the same house. everyone works. it's consistent, and hectic, and fights over money and petty shit are pretty frequent. ellie had to fight for it, but they've invested a lot of time and money into ellie's athletic passions. joel is begrudged and honestly is a shitty father figure to ellie. their relationship is like only able to be somewhat tied together through hockey. and the rest i can't tell you

ellie deadass needs to go to therapy. and it Shows.

she also has issues with intimacy. and it Shows.

she's also aaaaa.... im not sure what her major is, honestly. she might like humanities + stem double major. i wanna say she majors / minors in physics and astronomy because she thinks its cool but at the same time she probably like doesn't really fuck with the math at all (and it's not like she can't do it, she's one of those assholes that just writes shit down and somehow is able to reason her way to the right answer, but like shes usually hungover / sleep deprived but she's disciplined so she just half-asses shit instead of not doing it at all). but i feel like she definitely takes a lot of anthro or history courses and maybe that could be, like. her minor. double major. something. Or Honestly, Honestly. Honestly. maybe psych. she does take a lot of psych classes regardless though but then probably stops showing up for them when they hit too close to home Lol

ellie lowkey started her beef with abby because she was just one of those people who she just decided she hated (for a variety of reasons and all of the reasons were projections of her own personal problems. abby's life is ssoooo perfect cause her dads a dooooctor and her moms a zoooologist and they live in a gaaateeddd commuuuniityyyyy and she has expensive skaaaatteeessss and the best stiiiiiickkk and gets eveything she waaaants and ellie can't talk to her dad anymore and her mom is dead and she grew up where theres like heroin needles scattered on the ground and wore the same pair of shoes throughout her entire high school career because she didn't feel comfortable asking for anything else).....

it just solidified it when abby did one petty thing some day on like a wednesday or made some snide comment during a practice, so then ellie's friend group started talking shit about abby's friend group, and so abby's friend group started talking shit about ellie's friend group. their respective like groups of people kinda sorta let it go after a while .... but the two in the center are Still standing. ellie Fucking Hates abby. and Abby fucking Hates Ellie. for deadass no reason

anyways i'll tell you about abby another time im still figuring out what to do w her but there's. gesticulates w my apple pencil. History. there. (not Fucking history but.)

and you're there too, i guess (we'll get to you later)

and the rest i'll withhold because it's probably not much but. shrugs. just some basic things that are playing into this story that i like. my Silly Little World. my Silly Little Messy Hockey Women.

[kiwixlime]

The Quick Fix

E is for Enemies

Sam Drake is the smartest student on campus. He’s also an arrogant bastard and you genuinely hate him. No, really, you do. So what happens when you get stuck with him for a group project in your history class? Where do you channel all that rage?

Pairing: Samuel Drake x Female Reader

Warnings: Smut. It’s porn without plot. I just love the enemies to lovers trope. Well, I guess this is more enemies to friends with benefits. Also, this is an AU set in college. Any time I write about students/classes/etc, it will be college based. I do not write high school stuff. Hope you enjoy!

18+, Minors DNI

“I think it’s obvious I’ll take the lead here,” Sam says, finally joining you and the rest of your group at the university library. He pulls out a chair next to you, and on instinct, you scoot closer to the person on your left, putting as much distance between you and Sam as you can.

“No one has to take any lead,” you scoff as you open your binder and flip to the color-coded section labeled History. You slide it over to Sam, pointing your finger at the highlighted units already mapped out. “We each have one component to work on and then we can combine them together. If you had gotten here on time, you would have been a part of the selections. But you didn’t, so you’re stuck with the last topic.”

Sam smirks and drags your super-organized binder away from you, rifling through the pages with careless hands. You cringe at how thoughtless he’s being, hoping he doesn’t knock any of your notes out of place. “Mesoamerica? Am I supposed to be offended?”

“No,” you shrug, angrily taking your binder back. “I never said it was a shitty topic," you snap and keep your eyes trained ahead of you, glaring at the table because you know if you look over at Sam, you’ll throw a punch. And you’ve already gotten reprimanded for that before. He’s not worth it.

“Aw,” he coos and slides his chair nearer to you, invading your space. The wrath bubbles in your chest, but you swallow it down. Just ignore him, it’s in everyone’s best interest. “Aren’t you a sweetheart?” He teases, grabbing your hand, knowing that the small action will send you into a rage-induced spiral. But to your surprise, you keep your cool.

“Let go of me, Samuel, or I’ll scream and let everyone think you’re the older male student harassing a younger girl,” you warn, feeling victorious. That pride grows when Sam immediately drops your hand, letting it fall back down on the table. You reach for your pen, squeezing it so tight you hear it crack. Better that than Sam’s fingers. You guess.

The rest of your group watches with amused smiles. They’re used to your banter. On many occasions, you and Sam will go back and forth during class, trying to one-up each other, playing who’s the smarter student. Most of the time, Sam wins the academic battles. But you always take the gold medal in insults. So, you’ll take it.

They could stop you, but where’s the fun in that? Erin - your only friend in class - has told you many times that everyone gets a kick out of you and Samuel Drake going head-to-head over the simplest things. You’re probably the only person brave enough to challenge him, and that’s entertainment itself.

But, what you don’t know is that your little study group has bets placed on how long it’ll take the two of you to finally hook up. There’s a reason for all this tension, right? Yeah, you hate Sam, but you can’t deny he’s attractive. And you know he feels the same about you. He’s made some pretty crude remarks in the past. Still, it would take a lot for you to move past your disdain for the man to let something physical happen.

“Fine, Miss Priss,” Sam grimaces. “Guess I have what I need,” he sighs, gathering what little belongings he brought with him. “I’ll have my portion done by the end of the day. This was fun. Insightful. Catch y’all later.”

And just like that, Sam’s gone, like he was never even there to begin with. The rest of your group looks to you, the de facto leader, silently asking what’s next. You pretty much sorted everything out within the first hour of your meeting, so there’s no need for you to stay any longer. Really, you’d like to go back to your dorm and get started on your outline for the project. You hate group activities. It’s so much easier to work solo.

“We can go,” you say, neatly packing up your binder and folders and stuffing them into your bag. “We have a week to get everything done. If we just check in with each other and meet for a couple minutes each day, we’ll be fine. Just… Please, do your research, and edit everything you write. This project is worth a lot of our final grade and I’m not going to fail and lose my perfect GPA because someone isn’t holding up their end.”

Okay, maybe that’s why Sam hates you. But you can’t help that you’re a perfectionist. You are the typical Type A personality, and you don’t care what anyone thinks about you. You get shit done.

Everyone else just nods, happily falling in line. They all know that working with you will result in an excellent grade. “And when you’ve finished your section, email it to me and I’ll put together the final result. We can go over it once it’s finished,” you add, standing up. A chorus of agreement sounds around you, and you’re so thankful that all of them are weak enough to let you take charge. At least when Sam’s not around.

You give them a wave before walking off to a different section of the library. If you can check out a few books now, you won’t have to come back later and interrupt the workflow you’ll have going on. You’re casually walking down the rows of books, picking out a few every couple of steps you take. When you round the corner, you bump into someone, and the stack of reading materials you’ve been carrying drops around you.

“Well, fuck, can’t you fucking watch where you’re going?” You snap, not at all caring about who might be standing in front of you as you sink to the ground to collect your findings. Another one of your flaws - you can be an absolute bitch.

“Jesus Christ,” the person says, and you roll your eyes. Sam. “You’re so goddamn mean, and for what?” He chuckles, helping you up much to your chagrin.

“What are you still doing here? I thought you were leaving,” you huff, trying to peer over your stack of books to see what he has in his hands. He’s quick to hide it, though, smirking when you frown.

“I’m always at the library, sweetheart,” he teases, walking around you. He’s so tall, towering over you, making you feel small. “Great place to pick up girls,” he whispers, leaning down so his breath hits your neck.

“You’re disgusting,” you hiss, plowing him in the abdomen with your elbow. He chuckles and leans in closer, boldly bringing his arm around you to examine the books you’re carrying. He reads the titles of each one, humming to himself each time. “Are you quite finished?” You ask in annoyance, dipping underneath his arm to get out of his hold.

He throws his hands up in defense, in the process showing you which book he’s checking out. The History of Piracy. Cute. He’s into pirates. You should have seen that coming.

“Here to pick up girls, huh?” You ask, swiftly taking the book from his hand. He protests, but you ignore him, balancing his book on top of yours. You read the summary and find yourself smiling. “This actually sounds interesting,” you say with sincerity. “You research pirates a lot?”

He nods, blushing a little, scratching the back of his neck. “My brother and I are pretty invested in them. We’ve had dreams of being treasure hunters, as stupid as that sounds.”

“It doesn’t sound stupid,” you say, handing him back his book. “It actually explains why you’re so good at History without even trying that much.”

“You’re good, too,” he offers, a compliment you weren’t expecting. He’s getting too comfortable, and so are you. Time to shut that shit down.

“It’s because I’m pathological,” you tell him, which makes him laugh. He has a cute laugh. How have you never noticed that? Oh, right. You hate him. So act like it. Stop getting chummy with the enemy. “Anyway, I have to go. I need to work on my project. Good luck. I’m sure yours will turn out adequate.”

-

The night before your assignment is due, you find yourself up past your usual sleep time to put the finishing touches on your project. You thought you made it very clear in the beginning - you warned the group to bring their A-game. But when you received everyone’s email containing their part of the project, you had to practically redo everything on your own.

It’s beyond frustrating. And you know they’re taking advantage of you. If Sam were the one in charge (okay, so you lied, you wanted to be the leader), they’d have done the same to him. Losers who glom on to the smart kids and do the bare minimum, that’s what they are. God, you’re running on fumes as you type and retype reports. You can feel a headache coming on as you sit in the dark, the only light coming from your computer screen.

It’s way past midnight, but you’re afraid to actually glance at the clock. You know you won’t be getting any sleep tonight, though your eyelids are heavy. A sharp knock on your door is not something you are expecting this late at night. But it jostles you awake, giving you enough energy to power through, even though that energy is now fueled by fear. Your stomach drops, wondering who the hell it could be. Your roommate is out of town for an event, and even if it were her, she’d have a key. You never have late night visitors. And you’re not expecting anyone now.

You grab your keychain on the desk next to you, the one with cat ears molded into pointy daggers, for safety before you move. When you reach the door, you flip on the light switch in case you need to grab something else for defense. You take a couple of deep breaths and then swing your door open, pointing your keychain at the intruder.

“A cat? Really?” Sam asks, holding back a laugh. “What are you gonna do? Claw me?”

“I’ll have you know these ears are sharp and I could easily puncture your throat,” you huff, keeping the pointy weapon aimed at him. “What the hell are you doing here?”

“Can I come in?” He asks without waiting for an answer. He nudges past you and takes a look around your room. There’s a divider between the two beds, and he glances to both sides of the room, one messy with clothes everywhere, books in piles on the floor, and posters of athletes lining the walls. The other is systematized, tidy with everything in its proper place and sticky notes plastered to every available surface. “Wow,” Sam says, spinning around. “You are scarily organized.”

“Why are you in my room?” You ignore his comment and stomp over to your bed, tossing your keychain back onto the desk. You sit on the mattress, glaring up at him. “Go away.”

“Easy, girl,” he teases and moves to take a seat next to you. “I just thought maybe you could use the help.”

“Help?” You question, genuinely unsure what he’s talking about. Like you ever need help with anything.

“I saw the email threads,” Sam says. “It’s a fucking mess.”

Oh, that. Yes, that you can actually use help with.

“Right?” You groan in agreement. You skulk over to your desk and grab your laptop before sitting back down on your bed. “I warned those fuckers. And this is what I get?” You pause and narrow your eyes at him in suspicion. “Why do you want to help?”

“You’re not the only one who wants to maintain a good grade, sweetheart,” he deadpans.

You suppose you understand. Sam is an overachiever much like yourself. If you agree to let him help, you’ll definitely get things done faster, and you know the quality of the work will be just as superior if you did it alone.

Against your better judgment, you consent to let Sam stay and help you. You spend the first twenty minutes trying to decide on an order to arrange everyone’s documents. Of course, you argue, but that’s par for the course for you two. So when you finally reach a consensus, you consider that a huge win.

The next task you attend to is fact-checking, which takes about an hour even when you split the work between you and Sam. But luckily for you, he’s on the same page. He knows how crucial accuracy is.

When you’re done with the facts, you tackle the editing portion while Sam proofreads the updates. You are surprised at just how well you work with him when it’s only the two of you. You’re not fighting or trying to steal from one another. You have a good flow going, and you feel this weird connection with him.

But it’s been a long night, and you’re drained. So maybe these feelings will go away the next time you have to see him.

There’s really no point in sleeping. Your class is in a few hours. And you and Sam agree that practicing your presentation is more important than a few minutes of rest.

“I can’t believe this,” you eventually sigh, rubbing at your tired eyes. “I’m barely digesting what I read here. It’s all rubbish.”

“I told you I would be the leader,” Sam teases through a yawn.

“And I told you we don’t need one,” you say, making a very unflattering face as you try to not let Sam’s yawn affect you.

He snorts in disbelief. “Then what do you call this?”

“I call it being the only one who cares,” you answer, quickly and aggravated.

“I care,” he claims with a pout, and huh, he’s kinda cute when he makes that face. Oh, shut up.

You shake those weird thoughts from your mind and scowl. “Okay, fine. I like being in control, okay? I crave it. I need it. I want to control everything. I want all the power.”

Sam chuckles at you, amused by your admission. You're feisty; he likes that. “You ever think about relinquishing that power? It might feel good.” He suggests.

“No,” you answer snappily. “I will always take charge. I always have. If I take charge, then I can make things go my way. And do it right. And I don’t have to fucking rely on anyone. I don’t have to be disappointed.”

“Damn,” Sam says, feeling like he just got a deeper look into your soul. This new information makes him curious, and he glances at the photos on your wall, desk. Most of them are just of you and an older woman. Some with friends, he assumes. None of them with a man. “Daddy issues, huh?”

“Excuse me?” You exclaim, offended and impressed all at once. Okay, maybe it’s not that impressive, but in your defense, you’re tired. So is your brain.

Sam shakes his head, letting out a dry laugh. “No, I get it. I can relate.” He admits and looks at you. Your nostrils flare and your lips are pursed, and there’s a darkness in your eyes he’s never seen before. “You know, you’re pretty hot when you’re angry.” He says.

“Is that why you’re always pissing me off?” You ask him.

“No, but it’s a nice bonus.” He winks at you, and a thought crosses his mind. You might stab him for it. But it’s a risk he’s willing to take.

Sam stretches his arms above his head and scoots closer to you. For whatever reason, you let him until his leg is touching yours. He smells like cheap cologne and sweat, but it’s a little enticing. Up close, you can see the flecks of gold swimming in his eyes. He is handsome, you have to accept that.

“You should let yourself go once in a while,” he whispers, placing a hand on your thigh, rubbing over your soft skin just between your legs. “Give up control, sweetheart. Let someone else take charge.”

Your brain is screaming at you that this is a bad idea, but the sensation between your thighs is telling you to give in. So that’s what you do. Your eyes flick to Sam’s lips, and he gets the hint, pulling you in by your hair and kissing you hard. You find yourself kissing back just as rough in a bruising kiss.

Anyone who has been with you will say that you’re the dominant type, so when Sam tries to take the lead, you fight him. His hands roam your body, aching to pull you into him, but your fingers dig into his chest, trying to push him down onto his back. His kisses are rough and desperate, but so are yours. You’re not giving up your fight. Your hands flatten against his chest, using more force to push him down onto the mattress, but he stops you, grabbing your wrist.

“You don’t fuckin’ listen,” he tsks, bringing your hand to his lips, nipping at your fingertips with his teeth. “You want me to fuck you?” He asks, and your head goes cloudy at those words. His voice is deep and gravelly, and the throbbing between your legs intensifies. “Do you?” He asks again, losing his tolerance.

“Yes,” you breathe out, admitting to him (and yourself) that you want him.

“Then do as I say,” he warns and grabs you forcefully by the hips, throwing your body against the bed. You squeak as you bounce back on the mattress. Sam hovers over you, claiming your lips in a softer, more

passionate kiss, and you let him because his lips are warm against yours. You moan into him and feel him smirk, grazing his lips down your chin, to your neck, sinking his teeth into the smooth flesh. You tug at his hair, your way of asking for more without having to speak. He slides his hand under your shirt and pushes it up, exposing your stomach, then your breasts, until he can slide it the whole way off.

He kisses back down your neck, between the valley of your breasts while you pull aggressively at his shirt. He massages one of your tits with his hand while his mouth encases around the nipple of your other, sucking softly. He pulls noises out of you that you’ve never heard yourself make before.

“Sam,” you groan and arch your back off the bed, attempting to trick him into giving you what you want. In response, he bites your nipple, and you jolt beneath him. “Ow, you fuck,” you hiss.

“Behave,” he tells you.

“Touch me,” you plead, wiggling your hips.

“No,” he scolds, kissing your lips again. “What did I say?” He kisses his way down your stomach, stopping at your sleep shorts. He looks up at you with smoldering eyes, and you feel that warmth in your belly grow.

“You s-said,” you stutter, gasping when he hooks a finger beneath the band of your bottoms, inching them down. “Fuck, you said t-to do as you say.”

“That’s right,” he purrs, using both his hands to slide off your shorts. He sits up and takes in the sight of you. God, you’re beautiful. He’d never admit it out loud, not yet anyway, but you’re the one person he fantasizes about. No matter who he’s with, or what he’s doing, the image in his head is of you. “And that means letting Sam take control, yeah? So stop fuckin’ moving and begging and take what I give you.” Sam spreads your legs, rubbing his hands down your inner thighs. Your legs quiver and attempt to close, but Sam slaps your pussy lightly, forcing you to keep your legs apart. “I’m not gonna tell you again,” he says, voice deep. “If you want me to fuck you, quit being a bad girl.”

He settles between your legs, hooking his arms around your thighs and pulling your dripping pussy to his face. This is something he’s thought about since the moment he met you, so he’s going to take his time with you so you both enjoy it. Even if you get pissy and impatient. He pokes his tongue out, teasingly licking from your entrance to your clit, making you gasp and squirm. He licks you again, dipping his tongue between your folds and lapping up your slick slowly, savoring the taste of you.

“Fuck, Sam,” you whimper, and grab at the bedsheets with shaking hands. You try and fail to bite back your sounds as you thrust up your hips, losing your mind in a fog of bliss. “Sam, please,” you moan his name again. You’re growing impatient, writhing underneath him as you gradually unravel.

He groans against your cunt, flicking his tongue over your swollen clit. You taste incredible, and the sounds you make are so lovely, strung together with breathy moans. The way his name rolls off your tongue is nice, too. It’s fucking poetic the way you make such filthy noises sound pretty.

He slides two fingers inside of you, fucking you with them as his mouth closes around your clit. The action makes you thrash in your bed, disobeying his orders to stay fucking still. But you look hot, and you taste so sweet. So he doesn’t complain. Not when his tongue is buried deep in your pussy. How could anyone complain in this position?

“God, Sam,” you groan, patience wearing thin. “Just fuck me already,” you demand with a huff. You slam your fists down on your bed, ready to show him what to do and how to do it, but he pinches you, and you whine.

“Sweetheart, I love hearing those words come from your pretty little mouth,” he says, pulling away from your sensitive pussy. “But I’ll fuck you when I’m good and ready. Now why don’t you put that snappy mouth to use and suck my cock like a good girl.” He sits back on the bed and waits for you to follow his orders.

“I thought I was bad,” you mutter teasingly, propping yourself up on your elbows.

“Well, fine, smartass,” he chuckles, grabbing you by the back of your hair, and pulling you up. “Suck my cock like the filthy slut you are,” he whispers in your ear.

His words send a pleasant tingle through your body, and you push him back, letting him fall against your mattress. You try to climb over him and hold him down to restrain him, but he doesn’t let you. Instead, he guides your mouth where he wants it, once again taking over.

You roll your eyes and undo his jeans, yanking them down enough to show off his black briefs. He moans when your mouth over the bulge beneath them, flicking out your tongue to wet the fabric. His breathing picks up at your actions, and you revel in the small victory. Your quick fingers pull down his briefs to reveal his thick, hard cock, and you lick your lips, eager to taste him.

But you toy with him a bit, running your fingers over his shaft and looking up into his eyes. You smirk and wrap those fingers around him, squeezing lightly. He grunts, low but sexy, and that feeling of power courses through your veins. You bring your lips forward, kissing his leaking tip. He shudders, and his eager hands find your hair, tugging hard.

Humming, you swirl your tongue around the head, licking up his precum before you take him into your mouth. The sound that drips from his lips would make you laugh if his cock wasn’t filling out your mouth. You can practically feel the desperation radiating off of him as you bob your head.

“Fuck, sweetheart,” he moans, bucking up into your mouth. He hits the back of your throat, and you don’t even gag, leaving him impressed. “You were made in a secret fucking lab, I swear to Christ.”

You pull your lips off of him, holding him in your hand as you tease his tip. “Oh, yeah?“ You muse. “Because I know how to suck cock or…”

“Because you’re fucking perfect,” he mumbles out without thinking. You’d be lying if you said that little lust-filled confession didn’t make you blush.

But you don’t reply, grabbing the base of his dick and sucking him gently. Your plump lips close around him, velvety tongue flattening against his length as you take him deeper. He’s begging for you to go faster, begging for you to give him more. You giggle around his cock, and it’s then he realizes somehow you’ve got the upper hand again. So he grunts and pulls you off of him.

“So fucking difficult,” he says, grabbing you and flipping you over so you’re the one on your back. His hard cock teases your entrance before he slams into you, making your bed creak. The feeling of him inside of you is what finally, finally, makes you give up control. He’s fast, holding your legs apart by your knees so he can thrust into you nice and hard.

Admittedly, it’s been a while since someone’s fucked you right. You’ve had the occasional one-night stands, but nothing worth mentioning since you never got off. But Sam is so good and passionate and rough, pounding into you with his thick cock, giving you every inch of him you can take. His hips roll into yours, sliding deeper, hitting your sweet spot over and over.

“Baby,” he groans, burying himself inside of you. “Fuck, I knew you’d have an incredible pussy. Could be inside you all fucking night.”

“Yes, yes!” You gasp, turning your head, hiding your face in your blankets. His arms lock around either side of you as he anchors himself above you, thrusting in deeper. “Fuck, Sam, right there,” you whine, squeezing your eyes shut.

His sweaty body collapses on top of yours, and he grabs you by the hips, lifting your ass up, pounding into you faster. You don’t know if it’s the dry spell you’ve been having or the fact that Sam is just really fucking good in bed, but you’re about to cum, clenching around him, your toes curling.

“Fuck, cum for me, sweetheart,” he moans in your ear, feeling you squeeze around him. “Cum nice and hard, all over my cock, baby. God, I wanna feel you.”

“Sam,” you gasp as his thumb presses against your clit. “Sam, cum with me,” you beg. And he wants to do just that. He wasn’t going to last long in the first place, finally being inside of you, so your words spur him on. He looks at you for confirmation, and you nod. “Cum inside me,” you say.

Those words sound so fucking irresistible. He can hardly stand it. So with a few quick thrusts, he unloads deep inside of you. Seconds after, you cum, Sam’s name on the tip of your tongue.

Silence falls around the room, save for the sounds of your heavy breathing. Sam is next to you, breathing just as hard. Your mind is going over every possible scenario in your head, carefully calculating where to go from here when only one thing comes to mind.

“I still hate you,” you whisper, smiling a little.

“Good,” he smirks. “It makes the sex hotter.”

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