#everyone be on good behavior ok | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

3liza · 1 year ago

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a guy with nothing on his blog called charlessomethingsomething just followed me and only me, sent me a series of messages saying he had been reading my posts for a while and wanted to talk to me etc that didn't SOUND like bot writing but who knows (average DM of this type from an actual human man does not pass the Turing test), so I asked him which came first, ranch or cool ranch, and he's completely vanished. presumably he either blocked me or deleted or was a bot that got reported to death. but 1. I have never gotten a spam bot message me ever (except the past week possibly but different post) and 2. I think(?) a bot would have replied with some GPT nonsense right away instead of letting a question sit in their inbox for hours so I think it was probably a real person who couldn't take the heat.

anyway whether Charles was a bot or not, it got me thinking because I've had more interactions with men like this than any other kind. you have GOT to work on your game if a little 2010s meme nonsense completely derails your attack. I'm not a valid DM-slide target because I'm not on here for dick, myself, but like if I WAS, you're not going to get anywhere just bailing out the first time someone says something silly to you. (sitting backwards in my chair and slapping the back of my hand into the palm of my other hand) listen to me. flirting works on community improv theater rules. you have to be ready to take that pass from left field and run with it. and if I WERE on here for dick I would disqualify applicants who couldn't keep up with clowning. I not only let him hit if he's goofy, i and many others will actively prevent him from hitting if he isn't. on Tumblr you don't have nice forearms or a good shower routine, you're just a thirsty dude with a dumb username and ALL you have is the bants, so they better be good. sorry

#blog #incels refer to this derogatorily as a “shit test” because they have no social skills #meaning “to give a person shit”#what it actually is #is a pro social invitational behavior designed to give the other person a chance to respond and “play” with me #if you are bad at being funny thats ok not everyone is funny #the key here is to project confidence by being lighthearted and of good humor no matter what #this makes you appear more attractive to the other person and prevents you “losing” the challenge even if you arent good at bants #pro doom strats

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virtualcarrot · 2 years ago

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[DE] musing abt the limits of superficial acab discourse and the way fandom deals with moral discomfort, I guess

“ACAB”, “the only happy ending should be leaving the RCM”, “you’re a terrible person if you draw/write these characters enjoying the sort of corrupt cop stuff that they canonically do in-game” discourse is killing meeee

God forbid you don’t performatively remind everyone that you do hate cops, actually; and god forbid that you don’t find that True Healing and Happiness for Disco Elysium’s characters can only be achieved by leaving the force.

Metas could be written about how Kim and Harry are actually deeply flawed people who enjoy wielding some form of authority in a way that they actually feel best working as cops

(is it healthy? no. is it Good™? no. Is it true to their character? this is where media interpretation comes in)

Metas could be written about how that doesn’t mean ACAB isn’t real, that just means they’re the kind of shitheads (that we, the players, still love) who enjoy being cops

Metas could be written questioning the amount they’d have to change to adapt to a life as civilians, how much and what kind of a push they’d need to go for it, if it’s change they could even manage, if they could financially survive it, if they could find fulfillment in any other career, at their age

But no. Why waste time on that instead of easy slogans. I mean, we like them, these characters, and we don’t want to feel guilty for liking them, because what does it say about us, then, that we like flawed cops?

(nothing it says nothing it says we played a good nuanced extremely well-written game that skillfully made us like the sort of character whose past actions include sequestering some woman and beating a dude into disability. that’s what it says. i’d even argue that discomfort is part of the point)

#fandom #disco elysium #spoilers #meta : disco elysium #And hey!#I'm not saying that there aren't people out there writing corrupt cop content without realizing just how disturbing those behaviors are #either because of normalization #copaganda #privilege #or just deciding that they don't care enough to over analyze amateur works of fiction #(which while not ideal an argument can be made for to some extent)#what I'm saying is that the vast majority of ACAB discussion/content I've seen in this fandom is based on morality #and the search for an ideal more hopeful solution #more than character psychology #and while the hope for better is perfectly understandable and A-ok #and is where everyone should find a place to pitch their headcanons #the use of morality and politics as a blunt weapon to bludgeon people with and beat them into silence is exhausting #in general not even in this specific situation/fandom #especially since usually it amounts to: this UPSET ME (maybe even for good reason) so I'm going to make it YOUR PROBLEM #and RESPONSIBILITY

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fuzzbuns · 7 months ago

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Arlecchino discourse is really awkward because both sides are so convinced they are right and that the other side just lacks media literacy but 9 times out of 10 the take in question is also wrong and it leaves me scratching my head a little bit….

#fuzzy rambles #like either they are like ‘no she is bad and doesnt care for the kids at all’ or its ‘she is good actually and does care for the kids’#and for me its like… damn…. its actually a little more complicated than that but ok ig #saw someone say she doesnt care for freminet or lynette she just uses them as pawns for lyney to be her heir #which is so incorrect on almost every level #it’s basically a self report that they dont know freminet or lynettes relationship with arlecchino #like i think we can agree raising child solider is problematic or whatever while not painting everything she does as master manipulation #like the things ppl claim are just her 5000 level iq manipulation… rolling my eyes it doesnt even make sense #but at the same time she obviously isnt a saint who has everyones best interests in mind because they are still childe soliders #even tho things got better when she took control there is still a lot of cultish and cruel behaviors the kids get drilled into them #tho honestly the whole fatui is like that look at any of the recurits who arent from the orphanage and they are equally brainwashed #if not us than who or whatever (girl who thinks about what happened in the chasm and want to eat drywall)#idk. dont yall have parents? like u can love and care for a child and still suck as a parent #you can try to not become ur abusive mother and still turn into a monster of sorts #ignore the childe instead of child its literally muscle memory how embarrassing

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daz4i · 1 year ago

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WAIT I JUST REALIZED this episode explicitly confirmed what i always said. that fyodor didn't know nikolai's supposed to come to meursault, or at least not the plan to turn it into a death race. but also that nikolai wasn't in on HIS plan and definitely not a part of how he communicated with the outside world like i saw others speculate. so ahem, let me be oh so annoying and say,

i told you so

#anyone who argued with me over this. well. i don't wanna be too mean bc this doesn't actually matter much so all I'll say is HA!!!!!!!!!!!!!#ok i did my mandatory little sibling behavior I'm calm now. hope everyone's having a good day :)

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im-no-jedi · 2 years ago

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rereading FTFE now. the prologue still has me like 🥺

also obsessed with how I wrote Hunter in the first chapter. him trying to deny his own feelings while simultaneously feeling jealous over me spending time with Echo coupled with Wrecker actively wanting to ask me out, so he just gives up cause he’d rather his brothers be happy than concern himself with his own happiness, why is he like this slkdjfghlgfkdjs

#it's ok don't worry I snap him out of it later 😋#but yeah this is a running theme for him in this series #cause ya know it's just how he is #he's only 'happy' if everyone else is happy #that's why he let Echo and Crosshair leave after all #and why he let Omega stay #cause it didn't matter how much HE wanted Omega to stay #SHE had to admit it to him #this fool is constantly denying his own happiness in favor of others #my good sir that's codependent behavior if I ever saw it #call it 'selfless' all you want; ITS STILL UNHEALTHY #I swear I'm writing this series mainly to make HIM happy as opposed to myself #dlfjghihglfdskjh #MLWTBB chatter

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greywooden · 2 months ago

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what i like the most about bariş' character is his confidence and that he will do anything for his goals but he is very annoying and toxic at the same time

#i think the show has the tendency to describe his weird and problematic behavior as 'bad boy will do anything for his love'#i love bariş because well burak deniz is a great actor he is giving his everything for this role and without bariş nothing would be #interesting about this story #but he is getting on my nerves #he lied multiple times to filiz #she told him multiple times no and to leave her alone and he keeps following her #and bariş always vanishes and everyone has to be OK with it #he leaves filiz and then when filiz is trying to move on (again) he comes back he wants another chance #that must fuck with filiz knowing her family history #the good thing about bariş is that he safed filiz's family more than one time and his relationship with the siblings is cute af #bizim hikaye

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snekdood · 3 months ago

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i honestly deserved none of the shit ppl did to me that lead me to this point

#yall made a victim bitter and hate everyone. congratz ig. keep convincing yourself its somehow activism.#me saying a slur i shouldnt have in 2013/14 bc the ppl around me irl normalized it to me and that repelling people online from me?#understandable. everything else? yeah you can all fuck yourselves with a rake.#plus- that was literally 11/10 years the fuck ago. do you really genuinely believe in all of that time that im still fucking saying it #the only way you could believe that is if you thought I was some sort of secret strategic right winger whos planning ???? something #god the fuck knows what it would even be #if you think im somehow tainted bc of that past I think you might be a lil controlling of a person #im sorry no one is a pure person who never does wrong. get over yourself bc you sure as fuck arent perfect my good bitch #it was 11/10 years ago AND i was a fucking kid. yeah. i think im bound to make mistakes bc of the inherent ignorance of being a child.#i dont think that deserves to be held against me my entire life especially since I now heavily disagree with the reasoning for why #i thought it was ok to say in the fucking first place #yall just want an eternal punching bag and thats really it.#i could become a fucking saint and it wouldnt matter bc dur he said bad word 11 years ago worst thing anyone could do ever fer sure #yall are impossible to please and its why no one but the people you've guilted and manipulated gives a fuck about trying.#and even they eventually see it for the bullshit it is.#yall want someone to control and do everything you say. not for people to become better to others. you dont give a fuck #you auth piece of shit.#thats why i had to learn that slur was still bad to say offline. bc all the people online wanted to do was control my actions #tell ME what to do. tell ME what to draw. when they have no fucking right to TELL ME what to do. you can ask- im more receptive to being #asked to not do something. but any type of behavior control? good fucking luck. you think I failed highschool just bc of the bullying #n shit? nah its bc I dont like being ORDERED to do shit. and I never fucking will! and theres nothing anyone can fucking do to #make me do shit and if they try to force me to do shit they're controlling as fuck and authoritarian.#i have learned SO MUCH more on my own volition and desire to learn vs when I was TOLD that I HAD to.#all my life ive rebelled against this shit. you bet your ass im not about to stop with yall. ask me like im a fucking person #not TELL me to do something like im a fucking slave to your whims.#fuck you

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todayisafridaynight · 1 year ago

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sat here thinking of the ichigang playing mario party and i was like 'i should make a tierlist of how rgg characters play mario party' but wouldnt you know it my brain is huge

#snap chats #ive been watching my favorite guys play mario party while i work on comm stuff so thats why i was thinkin LMAO #i was also thinkin of one of my fave hcs wherein despite ichi being a true lover of videogames hes not super good at them #like hes GOOD but not AS good as you might think- true casual behavior he's just here for a good time #esp not after not bein able to play anything for like... two decades..#anyway maybe i should update the mario party list.... no i think im still solid on this analysis #i miss playing mario party with my sibs..#we played 4 a lot growin up and APPARENTLY 6 also but when i was Too Young To Remember #apparently i got so mad losing a minigame i accidentally pulled the controller and the gamecube off the table #and that damaged the disk enough to make it unreadable. LMAO baby rage real #ok bye i should finish at least one comm today i have a lot to catch up on #also can i remind everyone tumblr tag system still sucks cause i KNEW i made the mario party post before #but of course trying to look for it tumblr was gaslighting me into thinking it didnt exist like OK. Asshole #luckily i had the og png portraits so i just checked the file date on those and went to look for the ask #ok im gone now bye

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qkumber · 1 year ago

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WHYDIDNT HE JUST TAKE THE FUCKING 7 YEAR DEAL!?!?!?!?!?!??!!!!!!?!?!?

#AAAAAAAAAAAAJGMJSNFJSJSIAKKAJDJ!!!!!!!!!!!!#like!!! i get it ok i get it!!!!!#he fessed up to everything so he could have some fucking semblance of a clear conscience #and he confessed in front of kim so he could get some sort of validation?????? or forgiveness from her??????#but 86 fucking years???????#it wont fucking matter if hes on good behavior hes there for tje rest of his life #and yeah kim probably visits #but shes a fucking unhappy housewife to a man named glenn who says yup! yup! durimg sex?????#and jimmys stuck in a fucking cell the rest of his life #i fucking refusseeeeee dude #whyyyyy didnt he take the 7 years i will mever get over this im an emotional wreck ommfggg #theyll never be with each other ever again #now i fucking understand why i see everyone on here saying shit like #they have their own house..... theyre living together and theyre happy u cant tell me otherwise #bc that will never happen!!!!#what if i killed myself!!! lol!#anyways #sorry. jesus #yes this is about #better call saul

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sharlsworld · 1 month ago

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༘˚⋆𐙚｡⋆ horn dog - 𝐂𝐒𝟓𝟓 ⚘

（ 𝖼𝖺𝗋𝗅𝗈𝗌 𝗌𝖺𝗂𝗇𝗓 𝗑 𝗐𝗂𝖿𝖾 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋 ）

（ 𝗌𝗎𝗆𝗆𝖺𝗋𝗒 ）𝖼𝖺𝗋𝗅𝗈𝗌 𝗌𝖺𝗂𝗇𝗓 𝗂𝗌 𝖺 𝗅𝗈𝗍 𝗈𝖿 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗇𝗀𝗌．𝗁𝖾𝗌 𝖺 𝗌𝗈𝗇，𝗁𝗎𝗌𝖻𝖺𝗇𝖽，𝖿𝖺𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗋．．．𝗁𝗈𝗋𝗇𝗒

𝗇𝗈𝗍𝖾 ✫ originally this was called work wife and it was gonna be about lando and carlos and the reader teasing them but i had a different idea after i thought of one comment 😭 also i’m so sorry for being inactive i just lose motivation when i can’t find the right pictures

🝮

carlossainz55

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carlossainz55 I went golfing with Lando

charles_leclerc Very nice thank you for sharing with the class Carlos

yn yeah and he asked me to pack them lunch & cut the crusts off their sandwiches

⤷ landonorris what can i say? i’m a man who knows what he wants 🤷‍♂️

⤷ yn you cried and locked yourself in the bathroom when a bee landed on your shoulder last week

⤷ landonorris hey. it was a wasp alright

⤷ yn yes yes very manly

carlando y/n is so over this bromance

maxverstappen1 Very much hurt that I wasn’t invited.

⤷ yn the last time we went golfing the club flew out of your hands before you even touched the ball

⤷ maxverstappen1 Why am I catching strays?? 😨

yn cute. the hat, not you guys

⤷ carlossainz55 I love you too baby ❤️

⤷ yn get home now

⤷ carlossainz55 Yes ma’am

⤷ oscarpiastri Walk em like a dog sis walk em like a dog 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

⤷ carlossainz55 Don’t make me block you again

⤷ oscarpiastri Again?

🝮

carlossainz55

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carlossainz55 Date night with my one and only ❤️

georgerussell63 Oh jeez here comes baby #3. Brace yourselves everyone

danielricciardo Okay who let them out for dinner unsupervised?

scuderiaferrari Betting 500$ that it’s gonna be another boy.

⤷ mclaren Get your money in order.

⤷ f1 This is inappropriate behavior. Jk I’m betting on another boy

⤷ carlossainz55 ??

⤷ f1 And if I said twins then what?

⤷ carlossainz55 ???????

landonorris be expecting a pregnancy reveal in about 3 weeks everyone.

⤷ yn well just fuck me then i guess

⤷ carlossainz55 I did?

charles_leclerc Leave that poor girl alone Carlos goodness gracious

pierregasly Lets keep this PG carlos

⤷ carlossainz55 You cannot be talking

⤷ pierregasly You right you right 🐶

alex_albon you dirty dog 😏

⤷ georgerussell63 No. Not the vibes

⤷ alex_albon oh…

alex_albon is anyone else getting hot? 🌶️🥵

⤷ georgerussell63 Just stop trying. It’s getting sad

⤷ alex_albon alright then!

🝮

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yn 💌

landonorris wait a damn minute

georgerussell63 Very confuzzled

pierregasly Teach me your ways Carlos

alex_albon does bro have super sperm??

landonorris your already pregnant??

⤷ yn BEEN 😇 that picture carlos posted was from 4 months ago

⤷ landonorris i feel very betrayed right now

⤷ landonorris THIS IS WHY WE HAVENT BEEN HANGING OUT? 💔💔

⤷ yn well we can hangout now

⤷ landonorris ok i’m coming over

♥︎ by author

lewishamilton Congratulations you two!! I’m so happy for you guys 💙

alexandrasaintmleux Hardest secret to keep 😫 So happy we can finally have our shopping dates back

⤷ carlossainz I’m not. You guys go out everyday

francisca.cgomes cutest ever 🥹🥹 i’m so excited for baby sainz #3 <33

lilymhe Hottest mommy 😉🩷 i love u all

carmenmmundt Congratulations pretty lady I’m so happy for you and your family 🩵

charles_leclerc HAHAHAH I’VE KNOWN SINCE DAY 1 YOURE ALL LOSERS

landonorris CHARLES AND ALEX KNEW ME BEFORE ME?!?!?!? CHARLES IS SUCH A BIG MOUTH THOUGH

5 minutes ago

landonorris i’m turing around right now. i just need a minute to process this.

5 minutes ago

landonorris ok i’ve processed this i’m standing outside open the door

4 minutes ago

🝮

carlossainz55

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carlossainz55 The past week

alex_albon big back big back, carlos ate all the big mac’s 😍🌶️🥵😇

⤷ georgerussell63 Alex please

yn oooh hey fattie 🫶🏽

⤷ carlossainz55 Hello baby 😘❤️

francisca.cgomes baby emilio 🩵🩵

charles_leclerc I think carlos jr jr and emilio want to have another sleepover with leo and uncle charlie 😇

landonorris yum 😋 not the pizza, you 😉

scuderiaferrari Our favorite family ❤️

⤷ yn clearly not

⤷ yn who said that?

alexandrasaintmleux This is the most unaesthetic post I’ve ever seen

⤷ carlossainz55 Someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed today

⤷ carlossainz55 Hold on are you saying my wife isn’t aesthetic?? And my son?? How dare you

⤷ alexandrasaintmleux No y/n and emilio are always aesthetic I’m saying you don’t know how to put the right pictures together

⤷ carlossainz55 I don’t want to hear it

lilymhe only here for my girl and the babies

⤷ carlossainz55 You’re girl??

⤷ lilymhe yes MY girl 😂

⤷ charlos4eva carlos is always fighting for his life in the comments

hoeforsainzzz y/n still being salty is so real

all4lando what i would do to be that piece of pizza isn’t okay 😫😫

operationsainz55 i’ve missed lando always being with them 🥹

sharls_leclercussy baby emilio appearance!! now we need baby los

georgerussell63 Emilio did NOT want to hand that flower over

⤷ alex_albon “emy just pretend like your giving me the flower okay?”

⤷ carlossainz55 You two are the BIGGEST haters I know. BIGGEST if yk what I mean 🐽🐽

⤷ georgerussell63 What are you trying to say Carlos?

⤷ carlossainz55 I’m say you guys are fatties, might wanna cut back on the drinks, you girls are getting beer bellies

⤷ georgerussell63 How dare you, you bastard. I do not drink beer.

charles_leclerc Biggie & biggie jr ❤️

🝮

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yn i love you nyc

alexandrasaintmleux We need a girls trip to nyc

⤷ yn omg yes i’m already writing ideas in my notes app

⤷ alexandrasaintmleux Already making a mood board

⤷ carlossainz55 We’ll be back in December everyone

⤷ alexandrasaintmleux we?

⤷ yn as in me and alex?

⤷ carlossainz55 Wow

⤷ charles_leclerc Wow

landonorris me and the boys just got done absolutely demolishing some dino nuggets

⤷ yn that sounds very fun lando thank you for sharing with us

⤷ alex_albon they left you guys at the hotel? 😭

⤷ landonorris no they shipped me and the babies back to monaco to have some “alone time” if yk what i mean

⤷ georgerussell63 The baby doesn’t get hurt?

⤷ maxverstappen1 I don’t think it’s big enough to reach 😂

⤷ carlossainz55 Excuse me? I’ll let you know that I have bruised her cervix many times

⤷ landonorris Carlos sainz are you saying your saying you rough up your wife? 🫢 you dirty dog

⤷ alex_albon oh so he can say it but not me?

⤷ carlossainz55 What can I say she likes it that way

⤷ georgerussell63 You don’t need to be big to bruise someone’s cervix

⤷ carlossainz55 Tell that to her belly bulge

⤷ alex_albon and how would you know that George Russell? 🤨

⤷ georgerussell63 Google ho 🤣

⤷ oscarpiastri who is this DIVA💜

⤷ lewishamilton Wow sometimes I forget your not a middle aged man

⤷ oscarpiastri Like you? 🤣🤣 might be time to hang up the helmet old man💀 and rookie Alonso

⤷ fernandoalo_oficial What he say fuck me for??

⤷ yn idk leave me alone

scuderiaferrari Hope you all are having the best time in NYC ❤️

⤷ mclaren Read the fucking room?

⤷ redbullracing Ooh someone took the lead and don’t know how to act 🙄

⤷ mercedesamgf1 I HATE YOU ALL

⤷ f1 ho is u coo?

🝮

landonorris

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landonorris life as a single mom

BEING A MOM IS A JOB TO GUYS!!

yn oh shut your face

⤷ landonorris can you not yell?? i just put the boys to bed jeez

⤷ yn are you being cereal right now 😐

⤷ landonorris someone didn’t get d down last night

⤷ yn i’m gonna punch you in the throat when i get back to monaco

⤷ landonorris carlos!! control your woman!

⤷ carlossainz55 No thanks she scares me 🥰

⤷ landonorris at least give her some of that d man

⤷ carlossainz55 She’s been gettin it trust

⤷ yn why is our sex life always the topic of conversation??

⤷ carlossainz55 Bitches wish they were us

⤷ landonorris ooh we love a sassy man 💋

⤷ yn what is wrong with you

⤷ landonorris please don’t use that tone with me i’m feeling very sensitive right now

⤷ yn aww is it that time of the month

⤷ landonorris i’m the sweetest girl in town so why are you sooo mean? 💔😞🖤😖

oscarpiastri They always look like they just got back from war after being with you for more then 24 hours

charles_leclerc Let’s pray you don’t have kids until your at least 30

⤷ yn you’re*

⤷ oscarpiastri you’re*

⤷ lewishamilton you’re*

⤷ alexandrasaintmleux you’re*

⤷ landonorris your*

⤷ landonorris fuck i can’t do anything right

⤷ charles_leclerc I GET IT DAMN

⤷ charles_leclerc hahaha lando go back to school

⤷ landonorris you coming with me genius?

⤷ charles_leclerc damn

danielricciardo Now why would they trust you with two kids under 5

⤷ landonorris you’d be surprised with how much they trust me with…that’s right guys i know their dirty secrets 😏🍆🍑

⤷ carlossainz55 I’ll spill all your dirty secrets if you spill any of my dirty secrets

⤷ geogrerussell63 How are you guys getting that font??

⤷ landonorris it’s a secret

🝮

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yn surprise surprise,

mathéo & matthew 🤍 our little miracles

alexandrasaintmleux So much love 🤍 I’m obsessed with them already 🥰🥰

landonorris two more godsons to love 💙

f1 What did I say? Congratulations you two we are all so happy for your family 💙💙

carmenmmundt How precious 🥹🥹

alex_albon so what i’m hearing is carlos DOES have super sperm?

scuderiaferrari Does this mean we get 1000?? 😁😁

⤷ mclaren I was jking I knew it was gonna be a boy

⤷ f1 Hahahaha you have to pay both of us now 😂🫵🏽

francisca.cgomes so much boys 😭🩵🩵 i can’t wait to meet them 🥹

lewishamilton double trouble 💙💙💙 beautiful blessings truly

landonorris 4 is the best number 😏

⤷ yn don’t make me get pregnant again just to make it 5

⤷ landonorris gonna go cry in the bathroom brb

⤷ yn don’t come back ❤️

⤷ landonorris my heart can’t take this anymore

georgerussell63 You poor girl how are you surviving with all these boys??? 😦

⤷ yn i love my clingy boys

charles_leclerc Can’t wait to get them on the track

⤷ carlossainz55 You and me both brother

⤷ estiebestie i’m not okay

danielricciardo Congratulations on expanding your football team 💙

lilymhe milf 4x 😉 in awe of them 🩵

pierregasly Carlos Sainz the man that you are

carlossainz55 I love you and our sons more then life itself baby, I couldn’t imagine doing this with anyone but you ❤️

⤷ landonorris SOMEBODY SEDATE ME

⤷ maxverstappen1 Come on grandpa, let’s get you back to bed

#carlos sainz #carlos sainz smau #carlos sainz fluff #carlos sainz smut #carlos sainz imagine #carlos sainz x reader #lando norris #f1 smau #f1 x reader #f1 imagine #f1 fanfic #carlos sainz x you #carlos sainz x y/n #carlos sainz x female reader

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checkeredflagggs · 2 months ago

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Friendly Banquet

Pairing: logan sargeant x american!reader

logan gets chosen to host the end of the year dinner and that means the grid meets his partner

a/n: I’m firmly ignoring august 27th and choosing to live in my bubble of ignorance. this is my first ever smau so plz be nice - i also don’t have instagram or twitter so 🤷🏻‍♀️ doing my best with the format.

logansargeant

liked by yourusername, oscarpiastri, and 231,445 others

tagged: yourusername

logansargeant: honored to have been chosen to host this year's postseason dinner. can’t wait to welcome everyone to the farm!

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user1: HE’S GOT A PARTNER?!?

user2: HE LIVES ON A FARM?!

user1: ok but I can see the vision

oscarpiastri: it’s about time - I’ve been waiting to go back for months

logansargeant: like I’d invite you before I get my farm time in!

yourusername: don’t listen to him Oscar! You’re always welcome

oscarpiastri: you’re my favorite american

logansargeant: what?!

user3: oh i love them already

user4: what do you mean postseason dinner?!? EXPLAIN???

user5: if I find out this is an actual thing I’m gonna explode

user6: right?!? Just how long have these “dinners” been going on?

user7: brb just going to cry my eyes out

user8: why haven't we heard of this before

alexalbon: so when I have a pack of pets it’s weird but when you do it’s ok?

logansargeant: I live on a farm

alexalbon: so?

user9: I need photos stat. I need more evidence of past dinners

user10: right? Like you know these dinners be lit af

yourusername: I can’t wait either babe! But be warned - I’m putting you to work when you get home! 😘🩵

logansargeant: I’ve got my potato peeler locked and loaded ☺️

landonorris: you can cook? 🤨

logansargeant: unlike you? Yes

oscarpiastri: yeah he’s actually pretty good. but he had a great teacher

yourusername: awww thanks osc! 🧡

user11: oh my god. the emojis are gonna be the death of me

yourusername

liked by logansargeant, landonorris, estebanocon and 97,455 others

tagged: logansargeant, farmname

yourusername: the animals are primped, preened, and are ready to welcome the grid to dinner! They promise to be on their best behavior!🩵💙

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user12: omg they are so cute!!! Love them all!

user13: such photogenic pets 😍

maxverstappen1: I’m ready to meet them

logansargeant: they’re always ready to make new friends

yourusername: they do love to meet new people!!

charles_leclerc: how are they with new animals?

yourusername: they love them! All of our animals are extremely friendly

charles_leclerc: merveilleux!

oscarpiastri: is that scout and ranger in the second photo? they’ve gotten so big!

yourusername: it is! And time seems to fly with them in our lives now 😊

user14: oh are they new?

yourusername: they are! We’re a rescue farm and scout and her new puppy were surrendered to us when their family realized they couldn’t give them the care they needed. Ranger was just a newborn puppy — barely a week old

user14: omg that’s so sad and so cute 🥹

f1gossippage

liked by user1, user2 and 790,469 others

tagged: maxverstappen1, charles_leclerc, arthur_leclerc, danielricciardo, landonorris, pieregasly, sebastianvettel, lewishamilton

f1gossippage: It seems like the grid is on the move! Recently it has been revealed via an instagram post from logansargeant that the drivers attend a post-season dinner hosted by a fellow driver. This year it’s being held at farmname with logansargeant and apparent partner yourusername hosting. And not only are current grid members invited — notably seen traveling to the United States are Arthur Leclerc and Alexandra Saint Mleux as well as former driver Sebastian Vettel.

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user15: farm seb? Farm Seb? FARM SEB?!?

user16: we get more Sebastian content? Plz plz plz!! Post! More! Photos!

user17: I’m gonna cry if this is all we get. Please yourusername logansargeant post more photos when everyone arrives!

user18: the more I learn about this event the more fomo I get…

user19: user18 gets me. Cause what do you mean I’m not invited to this dinner…

user20: god what I would give to get a full list of everyone going?

user21: right? Like really?

user22: I’d bet money on jenson going! Like that’s his grid kid

logansargeant

liked by yourusername, sebastionvettel, estebanocon, and 590,278 others

tagged: yourusername

logansargeant: dinner prep starts early

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user23: god that looks so good 😋

yourusername: don’t forget about the grill babe!

logansargeant: like you’d ever let me hun

yourusername: 🤨?

logansargeant: I mean, yes dear. Whatever you say 🩵🩵

lilymunhe: you’ve got him well trained!

yourusername: right?

lilymunhe: teach me your ways!

alexalbon: what?

user24: im so jealous right? All of that looks so good and it’s just the prep?

user25: I need more photos of this dinner stat. Most of the gossip pages have the grid already at the farm! Who’s helping? Who’s banned?

yourusername: gonna be honest - most of the current grid is banned. I’ve seen the videos and have heard the stories. Not risking my le creuset

user25: oh god I feel that!

landonorris: hey! We’re not that bad!

charles_leclerc:…

carlossainz55:…

alexalbon:…

georgerussell63:…

landonorris: yeah ok that’s fair

yourusername

liked by landonorris, estebanocon and 890,455 others

tagged: oscarpiastri

yourusername: oscarpiastri is giving a tour of the farm and its animals

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user26: I’ve never wanted to be an animal more in my life

user27: nurse she’s out again! (I completely agree)

oscarpiastri: ok but you’ve definitely downplayed how many animals you have

logansargeant: dear?

yourusername: 🥹

logansargeant: 🙄

oscarpiastri: 🙄

yourusername: 😊☺️

danielricciardo: what stallions you guys have!

yourusername: they are gentle queens 👑

yukitsunoda0511: I love them. Thank you for having them and letting us ride them!

yourusername: of course!

user28: ok but what is happening Alex and Lily in the fifth pic? Like what is Alex doing???

lilymunhe: his best…

alexalbon: hey!

user29: ok but i love how both Lando and George got cornered by some animals in the 4th and 6th pictures

landonorris: they followed me! Everywhere!

oscarpiastri: this just in! Goats scare lando!

landonorris: you muppet! They’re creepy…

yourusername: 🥹 they just like you lando!

landonorris: if they could like me from a distance I’d prefer that

logansargeant

liked by yourusername, oscarpiastri, and 778,445 others

tagged: yourusername

logansargeant: I’d classify dinner as a success! Big thanks to yourusername for everything you do and have done - I wouldn’t be where I am without you and can no longer imagine a life without you. It was a dream to host this dinner with you 🩵

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user30: im? crying?

user31: oh my god same. Like I didn’t expect to open instagram to see such loving words

yourusername: babe 🥹 … I love you so much and there is literally nowhere else I’d rather be then cooking dinner and washing dishes with you

logansargeant: even the most simple of chores sound like a dream if I can do them with you

user32: ok I’ve just been called single in about 12 different ways 😭

oscarpiastri: well I was gonna tease you a little but now…I had a great time on farmname with you guys. Thanks for the wonderful memories

logansargeant: you know you’re always welcome Oscar

yourusername: we’ll keep the lights on and your bedroom prepared

user33: brb just going to cry my eyes out

alexalbon: thank you yourusername and logansargeant - it was a fitting end to the season

yourusername: it was a pleasure to have you! You’re always welcome as well

alexalbon: will definitely take you up on that. Logan mentioned sheep cuddle parties and I need to experience that

logansargeant: it’s definitely something else!

user34: oh my god it looks so pretty! All those fairy lights…

user35: lights? I’m just focused on how much food is apparently there. That’s like 3 different tables…

yourusername: I wasn’t taking any chances. No one goes hungry at my table

charles_leclerc: we definitely didn’t! It really was very good!

maxverstappen1: definitely the best grid dinner I’ve been too!

landonorris: hey!

carlossainz55: mate…4 people got food poisoning last year

landonorris: who said it was cause of my dinner?

georgerussell63: We aren’t taking any chances and you’ve been officially banned from hosting any future dinners

yourusername: im sure it wasn’t that bad landonorris

landonorris: oh no it was. Best not let me host again

user36: who let you host in the first place?!?

georgerussell63: It’s a random draw chosen before summer break and it’s now GPDA policy that landonorris doesn’t have a chance again

lewishamilton: thank you for the invite and for the truly delicious vegan food

yourusername: it was an absolute pleasure! And im glad those dishes came out good 😌 first time cooking vegan so I wasn’t sure…

lewishamilton: really? I definitely couldn’t tell. They were spectacular

yourusername: make sure you take some home then!

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norrizzandpia · 1 year ago

Text

The Video (Part 2) (LN4)

Summary: They’ve taken leaked videos to a whole new level.

Warnings: its a sex tape so that, sexual conversations, language, explicit

Note: when i was trying to come up with a part 2 for the video i literally couldnt think of anything until i was half asleep and this came to me and i was like THATS IT 🤓☝🏻(part 1 is here)

TWITTER

mclarensgirly woke up today and saw “lando norris y/n y/l/n sex tape” trending and thought it was a joke so i clicked on it and GOOD GOD IT WAS NOT A JOKE

- ln4andop81 my jaw DROPPED when it surfaced

- mclarenfan22 anybody watch it??

- mclarensgirly yeah ofc who do you think i am

- ln4andop81 YES.

- f1fan2 you bet your ass i grabbed my popcorn and STUDIED that vid

- mclarensgirly i had an idea lando was dirty but BROOOOOOO

- ln4andop81 its even hotter that the camera isnt propped up somewhere its literally being filmed by lando as he goes in from the back

- f1fan2 I LITERALLY STILL CANT WRAP MY HEAD AROUND IT LIKE HIS VOICE WAS SO CLOSE TO THE MICROPHONE AND YOU COULD HEAR ALL HIS MOANS AND THE SHIT HE WAS SAYING TO HER

- mclarenfan22 “you like being fucked from behind baby?” I CEASED TO EXIST.

- ln4andop81 WHEN HE WENT FASTER AND SAID “fuck baby so tight” 😩😩😩

- f1fan2 the way he gripped her hips so he could go harder>>>>

- mclarenfan22 this video has literally altered my brain chemistry.

—

y/nnn yeah ofc we have sex… look at him.

Comments:

danielricciardo HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

- landonorris shut tf up

- y/nnn let him laugh its fine im getting good dick

- danielricciardo im no longer laughing.

mclarenfan22 SHES SO REAL OMFG

Landos-lover1 slut behavior

- y/nnn stalker behavior babes, youre not his lover, i am 💋

- mclarensgirly oh how i wish to be as unbothered as her

- f1fan2 SHUT. DOWN.

landonorris this was not the planned statement we talked abt 🥲

- y/nnn planned statement my ass we were having good sex let them wish they were us

- ln4andop81 she understands the lando girlies to a level that makes me believe she once was one of us too

- y/nnn OH HELL YEAH I WAS DONT GET IT TWISTED HE WAS MY CELEB CRUSH FOR YEARS BEFORE WE STARTED DATING

- ln4andop81 BRUHHHHHH YOU MANIFESTED IT I ENVY YOU

- y/nnn THANK YOU THANK YOU I DID MY BEST

- ln4andop81 YEAH AND NOW YOURE HAVING GREAT SEX AND RUBBING IT IN EVERYONES FACES

- y/nnn THAT TRULY WAS THE GOAL.

- landonorris what just happened

—

landonorris apparently the statement never mattered anyway so basically i love my girlfriend and that video was supposed to be kept between us but honestly now all yall bitches know im good in bed SO THE NICKNAME NORIZZ BETTER BE PUT. DOWN.

Comments:

carlossainz norizz will never die.

- danielricciardo norizz lives on.

- oscarpiastri norizz forevermore.

- landonorris i hate you

- y/nnn its ok baby they didnt see the tape so they dont understand

- landonorris well now they need to watch it to understand im sick AND TIRED of this

- oscarpiastri ARE YOU STUPID DID YOU JUST ASK ME TO WATCH YOUR SEX TAPE

- danielricciardo lando there is a target on your back.

- carlossainz im gonna pretend like i dont even know who you are

- y/nnn what an overwhelming no!

- landonorris 😒😒

oscarandlando4ever norizz the nickname was forgotten the first time around when the grinding vid surfaced

- f1fan2 yeah they went in for the overkill this time

mclarenfan34 yeah we def KNOW youre good in bed now dw

- mclarenfan22 “do you like it when i make your eyes roll back my love?” PROVED THAT.

- mclarensgirly “ill never get over the feeling of you fuck baby” 🤭🤭🤭

- f1fan2 *she moans his name* “yes y/n say my name baby let everyone know who makes you feel this good” I HAD TO TAKE A BREATHER

- mclarensgirly “good girl” and “youre taking me so well” HAD ME DRY HEAVING.

- ln4andop81 no but the best part of the entire vid was when she came and he moaned “yes baby ill never get tired of the feeling of you cumming around my dick like a good girl”

- y/nnn im a lucky girl ‼️

—

TWITTER

mclarensgirly one month since the sex tape leaked and we FINALLY get the info from lando on HOW it got leaked

- mclarensgirly in an interview with lissie he says, “it was actually my fault. There’s a, uh, folder, if you will, on my laptop that has videos and pictures of that category which we have accumulated in the years we’ve been together. Well, anyway, i was emailing with a fan about her transaction with quadrant merch. It’s a long story but her order had been so screwed up that i had to step in and see it out myself, but, nonetheless, i was trying to attach her old receipt and new receipt to the email, but, because it was 2 AM and I was exhausted, I didn’t realize I went into me and y/n’s folder, didn’t realize I clicked and attached that video. By the time I realized what I had done, the email had already been sent. The fan never emailed me back to get her merchandise, but the next morning we [y/n and him] woke up to it being plastered on all platforms.”

- mclarensgirly he later goes on to say, “No, we weren’t that mad. I mean, yes, we were mad the fan had leaked it, but we weren’t upset it was out there. You can see us make jokes about it on our social medias. We’ve made sex jokes before and we had that other video leak a few months back, so it isn’t a shocker or touchy subject with our fans that we have sex. Yeah, the video was a lot and I’m sure made people uncomfortable, I’m sorry for that, but, at the end of the day, it’s a natural, healthy part of a relationship and we didn’t feel the need to try and cover it up.”

- ln4andop81 YOURE FORGETTING MY FAVORITE QUOTE FROM THE ENTIRE INTERVIEW WHEN HE SAYS “we have great sex! We have a great sex life! And if people know that I’m more than capable of satisfying my girlfriend in bed, then so fucking be it. Neither of us are complaining.”

—

TWITTER

landonorris 2 videos leaked, nervous the others will too

- y/nnn put the GODDAMN folder on a flashdrive and give it to me PLZ. i will keep it safe

- landonorris only way ill do that is if you recreate both leaked vids with me

- y/nnn deal.

#f1 fanfic #f1 imagine #f1 fic #f1 x reader #mclaren #lando norris x reader #lando norris imagine #lando norris fanfic #lando norris fluff #lando norris imagines #lando norris edit #lando norris x you #lando norris smut #lando norris fanfiction #lando norris

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mirkoluvs · 6 months ago

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★ MHA SMAU: DATING KATSUKI BAKUGO

notes: it’s been a minute… heyyy guys 😅

liked by katskugo, urgirlpinky, manlykiri, ochochko, and others…

y/nstivites: he’s a lover boy the tough guy thing is an act

tagged: katskugo

katskugo: delete that caption

ochochko: AWWW so he really is just a softie 🥹

↳ katskugo: NO

↳ urgirlpinky: bros upset cause people think he’s nice 😭

↳ katskugo: stfu

mightoriya: it took him a while to pick those!! he wanted to make it special 😁

↳ katskugo: SHUT UP IT DIDNT

↳ y/nstivites: you do realize that’s a good thing right

↳ katskugo: it doesn’t sound like one

↳ y/nstivites: …

liked by katskugo, ochochko, mightoriya, _denking, and others…

y/nstivites: my personal chef 🧑🏼‍🍳

tagged: katskugo

_denking: SO YOU CAN COOK YET LET ME STARVE???? @.katskugo

↳ katskugo: like i’d ever waste ingredients on you

↳ _denking: some friend you are.

↳ y/nstivites: it’s ok denki sneak into my dorm next time and i’ll get you a plate 😋

liked by _denking

↳ _denking: this is why ur my favorite y/n

↳ katskugo: if you’re cheating on me just say that

↳ y/nstivites: KATSUKI

↳ katskugo: yeah you’re right you wouldn’t be able to survive going from me to spark plug you’d die from the downgrade

↳ _denking: WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM

↳ katskugo: you

satobakes: looks really good!

liked by y/nstivites, katskugo

↳ katskugo: thanks

liked by satobakes

liked by y/nstivites, manlykiri, urgirlpinky, seroman, and others…

katskugo: 🖤💪🏻

tagged: y/nstivites

y/nstivites: this is misleading he made me add 10 extra reps to my normal workouts

urgirlpinky: you wanna be mysterious SOOO BAD

↳ katskugo: WHAT DOES THIS EVEN MEAN

↳ urgirlpinky: would it kill you to post a happy normal kissy face sunshine rainbows couple picture

katskugo: it would

↳ y/nstivites: 🙁

liked by urgirlpinky

↳ katskugo: …

manlykiri: me when?

↳ katskugo: you never

↳ urgirlpinky: i’m sorry i screamed this is insane

↳ urgirlpinky: he is not your friend kiri this is opp behavior

↳ manlykiri: 😢

↳ _denking: it’s ok i got you bro

↳ seroman: ayo?

↳ katskugo: 😐

liked by y/nstivites, urgirlpinky, jirouplugin, mightoriya, and others…

katskugo: the best part

tagged: y/nstivites

y/nstivites: KATSUKI NO WAY

liked by katskugo

y/nstivites: IM GONNA CRYYYY

liked by katskugo

y/nstivites: i love you so much 🥹🤍

liked by katskugo

↳ katskugo: i love you more baby

liked by y/nstivites

urgirlpinky: EVERYONE SCREENSHOT THIS IS HISTORY

liked by jirouplugin

↳ katskugo: SHUT UP???

↳ _denking: youre such a lover boy kacchan

↳ katskugo: sleep with one eye open tonight

urgirlpinky: literally the grumpy x sunshine troupe irl

ochochko: I SCREAMED OUT OF EXCITEMENT

#mha fanfiction #bakugo katuski #mha x reader #mha #bakugo x reader #katsuki bakugou #katsuki bakugo x reader #mha smau #mha fluff #bakugo fluff #mha bakugou #mha scenarios

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