#everett middle school

[collegible]

Get Ready for the Lowell Admissions Test!

Collegible provides the only Star Assessment Prep Course in San Francisco. The Star Assessment is now the official admissions test for Lowell High School. All applicants (from public and private middle schools) must take the Star Assessment and submit scores as admissions criteria. SFUSD plans to implement the Star test in January 2025 for applicants from the Fall of 2024. Learn more about our classes. Last Chance for Lowell! If you missed all of the previous classes that Collegible provides, then you need to register for our last Star Assessment Prep Course. What: 8 hours of Star Assessment Prep in a 4 session prep course When: Starts Mon Jan 6. Takes place on Mondays and Wednesdays for 2 weeks (Jan 6, 8, 13, 15 in 2025) Why: 8th graders will take the Star Assessments between Jan 13 and Feb 7, 2025. The Star Assessment is used as an admissions test for Lowell High School applicants. How: Register at https://2024startest.eventbee.com This January course is the last chance to prepare for the Lowell Admissions Test. The Official date of the Lowell Admissions Test is January 8, 2025 for non-SFUSD students.

SFUSD students will take the Lowell Admissions Test (A.K.A. Star Assessment) bretween January 13, 2025 and February 7, 2025.

What: 4 Sessions Covering the STAR Assessment Math and Reading Where: Collegible's Virtual Classroom

Session 1 Intro to STAR Assessments, Mathematics  Session 2 STAR Reading  Session 3  STAR Mathematics Session 4 STAR Reading + Recap Collegible's STAR prep course includes 8 hours of live instruction. The course also assigns homework so students can apply strategies to prepare for the Star Assessment. The classes are interactive and require student participation. Our courses take place in our virtual classroom. The STAR test is required for all applicants to Lowell High School, regardless if they are from a public or private middle school. 

Info@collegible.com 415-320-7424

[iamfitzwilliamdarcy]

I think a place of hurt a lot of single women are coming from, right or wrong, is youre told as a teenager to know your value in dating and it’s up to you to hold your standards but when you hold your standards so long you become a single woman at 30 you’re now the problem for never getting married

[mytwofaithsandtroths]

So what do we think Mr. Martin is lying about this time regarding the fire?

His story is: I contemplated suicide but I changed my mind last minute and tried to clear the gas from the room. Janet walked in carrying a flint torch from another chemistry test. It was an accident caused by a moment of despair on my part and poor timing. I need Janet’s forgiveness to move on from accidentally killing her.

Except: He has never once before given an accurate recounting of that day. Including to Janet. When he met Rhonda, he offered the lie first that Janet died in some other way. Janet says he did it to protect her. Protect her from what? Rhonda’s already dead, and I doubt "chemistry fire" would have thrown up a flag for her -- it happened 6 years before Rhonda died, so she could have known already/heard in middle school. Seems like a risk to make up another death, tbh. It also seems Janet believes Mr. Martin was protecting Janet’s reputation (?) because she had “caused” the fire from Rhonda?

Why has Janet been made to think that “causing the fire” is a bad thing to have come out. It was an accident, right?

Janet felt this need/appreciated his "reputation management" with Rhonda without realizing that Mr. Martin has been lying to her since the second they died. She clearly did not know that he was contemplating suicide and that’s why the gas was in the room. After Dawn crosses over and Janet is mentioned in the support group, Mr. Martin gives another big ole lie about the fire (A lie that, coincidentally, makes him look like a hero):

The day I died, I made a mistake. I turned my back on a student for a split second, and there was an error, a fatal error. There was a fire. I managed... I managed to save my class, but not myself. Doesn't that make you a hero then? A martyr? It wasn't even your fault. I was the teacher. I should have been paying closer attention. I should have known what was going on. Instead my... my students had to live with the memory...Of seeing... seeing all that.

Seeing what? If you were closing the windows to open the gas valves and count in your watch, your students weren’t in the room, Mr. Martin. You’re lying for the fun of it at this point. And when fiiiiinally confronted with the "truth" and wrath of the ScaryScoobyGang, Mr. Martin says “I didn't know you were testing flint torches and you would light a flame!” Well, goddamn, Everett, how was she to know you were flooding a room with gas?

And, the closest to a first-hand source we have is Eugene Bergstrom who says:

No. I know for a fact that Janet's father is the reason Mr. Martin was fired. I overheard them talking about it the day after... The day after she died. The police don't believe me, but I know in my bones Mr. Martin started that fire on purpose. He wanted revenge. He killed her.

Mr. Martin says: "The school district had, had been looking for a reason to get rid of me. They said I was a thorn in their side. And all it took... was one phone call from Reverend Hamilton, and they sent me packing." And that this was also enough for Alice to leave him because she couldn't see a future with him -- dunno about you, but my man losing one job wouldn't make me turn him down immediately. There is a pattern of something with him.

Why was he a thorn in their side? Why were they already looking to boot him? I get Janet's dad made the call, but more than Janet's father protesting led to his firing.

What was it?

What part is he leaving out or twisting yet again?

[roosterforme]

Batting Practice Part 30 | Rooster x Reader

Summary: You only get two nights alone with Bradley in Palm Springs, and you're determined to enjoy every minute of your honeymoon. Bradley isn't so sure how you'll feel about the gifts he bought for you, but you light up when you see them. While the weekend felt too short, going home means you both get to see Everett again.

Warnings: Fluff, angst, swearing, smut

Length: 5600 words

Pairing: Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw x Female single!mom Reader

Check my masterlist for more Top Gun fun! Batting Practice masterlist.

Bradley held your hand the entire way to Palm Springs as the two of you softly shared your ideas for the future. It was dark outside, and there was no traffic, making for a peaceful ride. You had changed out of your wedding dress into some leggings and one of his tee shirts, but you still looked as beautiful as you had earlier at the ballpark when he slipped your wedding band on your finger. Right now you were talking about going to Disney World when Everett had a school break, but the details didn't matter to Bradley. He was happy going anytime you wanted. 

"I've never been to Florida. I've barely been out of California, and even then, just for work conferences in Minneapolis in the middle of winter," you told him, rubbing your soft fingers along his rough ones. "But you've been everywhere."

Bradley contemplated his response for a beat. Sure, he'd been all over the world with the navy. He'd seen a lot and been able to act the part of a tourist at times, too. But he'd never experienced this before. "Yeah," he agreed, turning down a desert road. "But this is the first time I've had a home since I was a kid, Kitten. I'll take you and Ev anywhere you want to go, happily. And then we can return home where everything is perfect. Home is where the Phillies room is."

Your laughter filled the Bronco as the lights of Palm Springs came into view between the mountains. Bradley navigated the last few miles to the hotel, and then he helped you out before grabbing both bags. The night was cool, and you had goosebumps on your arms when he touched you there, but your lips were warm and inviting. "I love you," he whispered. "Let's go to our room."

He wasn't sure if it was the chilly air that made you shiver or his words, but he was planning on showing you how many different ways he could love you over the next two days. Emotionally and physically. It only took a minute to get checked into the small boutique hotel, and then you were leading the way to the room, occasionally grinning at him over your shoulder. 

As soon as that door was closed and you said, "Oh, look how pretty-" Bradley had his mouth on yours as he pushed you up against the door. "Coach," you gasped, pliant in his arms as his hands found their way up inside your shirt. 

"You feel so good. So soft," he whispered, voice harsh as you started to pull the shirt over your head. As you stood there in your white lace bra, nipples peaked against the decadent looking fabric, he said, "You're my wife."

The way your body arched into his as your head tipped back against the door made his eyes go wide. He wrapped his big hands around your hips and hauled you to bed, pressing you down underneath his bodyweight as he dipped his hand into the elastic waistband of your pants. You were so wet. He shouldn't have been surprised. And now you were getting a little loud as he stroked your clit. That didn't really surprise him either. 

"I like you loud," he grunted, taking a minute to wrench your tight pants down your legs and drop them to the floor. You were perfect, writhing around, gasping his name in your white thong and matching bra. When you reached for him, he tried to slow his pace, tried to get himself undressed, but he just couldn't.

So the first time he made love to you after you got married, Bradley still had his jeans mostly on, and your pretty panties were pushed to the side to accommodate him. He managed to get your bra off as you ran your hands along his neck and up into his hair, and then you pulled his shirt off for him. But the urgency to be with you was still there. He hoped it never went away.

"I love you, Coach," you gasped, keening loudly as he sucked on your tits and got you off with his fingers and his cock. And then he came for you, messing up your thong when he withdrew, watching his cum seep out of you and onto the bedding. 

"We're gonna destroy this room," he whispered, taking in your body and the way you were gently stroking your tits in the aftermath. 

You bit your lip and watched him stand at the foot of the bed. "Let me know when you're ready again. I have an idea for that couch."

----------------------------

As soon as you got cleaned up from round one with Bradley's undershirt back on, you dug around in your overnight bag. And then it became abundantly clear that Molly packed your overnight bag with a specific agenda in mind. Yeah, she packed your toothbrush, face wash and makeup. Sure, she packed your phone charger and vitamins. But when it came to clothing, all you had with you was your leopard print bathing suit, one of Molly's bodycon dresses, and lingerie. And more lingerie. And new lingerie that you'd never even seen before. 

"Bradley!" you called out to your newly minted husband who was in the bathroom. You stormed over to the door and pushed it open to reveal him washing his hands. 

"Yeah, Baby?"

"Why did you let Molly pack my bag?"

He gave you a funny look. "I thought she'd know better about what you'd want to bring here than I would."

You laughed and shook your head. "She packed it for you. Not me. There's nothing in there except sexy underwear and one skin tight dress."

Bradley's grin grew as he pulled his phone out of his pocket. "I'm gonna thank her right now."

"When I'm wearing an inappropriately short dress to dinner tomorrow night, that's on you and her," you told him, strolling out onto the balcony that overlooked the pool. 

But he was right behind you, pressing himself against your back as you leaned against the railing and looked out over the desert lit up by moonlight. "This dress? How short we talking?"

You pushed your butt back against him and whispered, "You'll think my pussy is on your dinner menu."

The way he groaned in your ear and wrapped his arm around you left little doubt in your mind that he was ready for round two. "How about for a midnight snack?" he asked, reaching beneath the shirt you were wearing and running his rough hand up your thigh. His lips and breath were hot on your neck as you wiggled your butt. He hissed, "I want you."

"You just had me," you replied, biting your lip as you watched the few people below who were having a late night swim. And then he was slipping one long finger down along your slit and pushing it inside your pussy, still messy with his cum from a little bit ago. 

"Well, I want you again." He was kissing the side of your neck now as you contemplated whether or not it was a good idea to do this on the balcony. "How could I not want my sexy wife?" 

Okay, so you were going to let him fuck you on the balcony. 

While your room didn't have any exterior lights shining, it wasn't so dark up here that you were completely hidden. And the wrought iron railing wasn't going to help hide much, but you were already getting excited just thinking about it. When you bent a little more at the waist so your bare butt and thighs were rubbing against the front of his shorts, you looked at him over your shoulder and whispered, "You wanna?"

With a groan so loud you were afraid the people in the pool might look up, he withdrew his finger from your pussy. "I wanna." And then you squeaked as he wrapped his forearm around your belly and ground himself against you. "You gotta keep quiet, Kitten." And then he bent you a little more, and you could feel the cool night air on your slick opening before he yanked down his shorts and filled you up. 

You weren't prepared to take him right then all at once, and Bradley had to cover your mouth immediately as you braced your hands on the railing.

"I love it when you get loud," he grunted next to your ear as he started thrusting. When you licked his palm, paying special attention to his wedding band, he slipped two fingers inside your mouth. "But that should keep you quiet."

Bradley fucked you so hard and fast while you watched everyone in the pool, you were ready to cum after a few minutes. His fingers had you literally drooling, but his mouth was on your neck, and he was whispering how good you were for him. 

"You gonna cum, Kitten? I can tell you are." His voice was ragged now as he squeezed your breasts through the shirt, stroking your nipples with just enough pressure that he had to add a third finger to your mouth to keep your moaning quiet. And then you came on his cock, legs shaking and back arched, drowning in the pleasure he was giving you. 

"I'm close," he whispered. "You can take it." Then he withdrew his fingers and grabbed your hips with both hands and fucked you even harder. When he came, you bit your lip. There was a couple getting out of the pool, and they glanced around as Bradley finished. He slipped out of you, his warm cum coating your inner thighs as you stood. You kept yourself in front of him as the couple glanced your way briefly, but Bradley was too busy singing your praises next to your ear to notice. 

"I can't believe we did that," you said with a shy smile as you spun to face him. 

Bradley smirked as he tucked himself back into his shorts. "I still want to know what you have planned for the couch."

"Maybe I'll show you tomorrow."

-----------------------

Bradley woke up the next morning with your naked body wrapped around him and a strip of sunlight streaming in through the sliding glass door. Your diamond ring was sending little bursts of color along the ceiling and the walls as it reflected the light, and the splotches of orange and green and purple danced across your face as you started to move. Your long eyelashes fluttered as you opened your eyes, and your lips curved into a smile just for him.

"I love you, Coach," you whispered, the reflected colors moving down your body before you slid your hand away and leaned up to kiss him. 

He cupped your cheek and whispered, "Mrs. Bradshaw," between kisses. 

It was just a few seconds before you were riding him, putting on a show and letting him touch you all over. Bradley loved the visual of you sliding up and down his cock, getting a little louder with each motion. "You're gorgeous," he groaned, caressing your thighs and hips with his big hands. "I can't believe I have a wife. A fucking MILF at that."

You laughed and leaned down to kiss him, anchoring your hands against his shoulders as you continued to fuck him just right. When you and he were spent, you were draped across him again while he was still buried inside you. "I'm hungry," you whispered, kissing his neck. 

"Room service? I wasn't really planning on sharing you with anyone else until dinner."

You pouted up at him as he played with your paw print charm. "I want to go in the pool."

He nodded. "I'd kind of like to see what our balcony looks like from down there. I swear that couple last night saw us." Your soft moan let him know what he suspected; you found it more sexy than upsetting that someone may have seen part of that. Some knowledge to keep tucked away for next time. "Let's go check out the cafe."

"You're so funny," you told him, easing yourself out of bed and leaving his messy cock resting against his abs. "I. Don't. Have. Any. Clothing."

Bradley laughed as he stood as well. "Put your sexy leopard print bathing suit on, jungle kitten. The pool bar will serve us food."

He watched you pull on your bathing suit as you muttered some unfriendly things about Molly. "At least she gave me flip flops."

"You can always buy something from one of the shops downstairs," Bradley said, lacing his fingers with yours and coaxing you down to the lobby. 

But what started as a search for a dress or a cute outfit for you quickly turned into something for Bradley and Everett. 

"Check it out!" he said, holding up a child's size baseball jersey that said Palm Springs Vintage League. "They have some for adults, too."

You flipped over the price tag and balked. "Ev doesn't need it for two hundred dollars."

Bradley frowned. "But he and I could match. All three of us could, if you want one too, Kitten."

"He'll outgrow it by next year."

He stood there and just stared at you. He had a son now. Kids outgrew things as they got older. The thought was really unsettling to him as he held up the little jersey, much like the Bradshaw one that you had gifted to him yesterday. It was adorable, and Everett would love it. "I don't even know what size he wears," Bradley muttered, checking the tag for a different reason. 

"He's usually a 7/8," you replied casually. But when Bradley went silent again, you asked, "What's wrong?"

He swallowed hard and said, "I just... don't know that kind of stuff about him. You know? I feel like I know a lot. Like I try to pay attention. I know what he likes and doesn't like. I know that he loves the Phillies and science class and pancakes and swimming. I know that he doesn't have any allergies, because it was on his fact sheet for tee ball." You wrapped your arms around his waist and kissed her sternum though his shirt. "But, Kitten... I didn't know what size he wears. And I don't know his blood type or anything like that. What if something happens to him when he's with me? What if there's something important I should know and I fuck it up?"

"His blood type is A negative," you said, squeezing him a little tighter as he gripped the hanger in his hand. "And you're not going to fuck anything up, Bradley."

"I accidentally taught him a bad word last week. And I accidentally kind of told him what a sugar daddy does."

You burst into laughter against his chest, shaking in his arms as you tried to calm down. "Okay, but that's not the end of the world. And honestly, both of those are pretty funny now when I think about them. But you care about Ev so much. You went and got him from Danny's house when I called you."

He kissed your forehead. "Don't talk about Danny," he growled. "Hate him."

"See? You're nothing like him at all! You think Danny knew Everett's blood type? Or what size he wore? The difference is, Danny didn't care to know those things at all. You do. And you'll catch on to more now that you live with us."

Bradley nodded and took a deep breath. And when he left the shop holding your hand after purchasing three of the jerseys, you didn't complain about the price at all. 

----------------------------

After you ate brunch on an oversized lounge chair next to the mid century modern pool with Bradley, you fell asleep while he watched the Padres recap on his phone. Your body was sore from last night, but he kept his arm wrapped around you, stroking your skin softly with his fingertips. 

As you dozed on and off, you muttered to Bradley, "Will you text Molly or Bob and check on Ev? And see how Ev's future cousin is doing?"

"Already did about an hour ago," he replied, taking your hand and kissing your fingers. "All good. Ev and Bob went on a hike. And apparently Molly ate some vegetables for the baby but washed them down with gummy bears."

"That sounds right," you murmured, yawning and stretching. "You wore me out, Coach."

Bradley looked at you from under the bill of his cap. "I thought you promised me that your pussy was on my dinner menu."

The waiter who was walking by snickered, and you tried to hide your face. "Bradley," you groaned. 

"Well, is it on my dinner menu or not, Kitten? I'm starving for it."

"You're insatiable."

"It's our honeymoon. But I'm going to take you on a longer trip just the two of us. Because as much as I love Ev and want to know everything about him, I love you, too. And I love my dinner menu."

You ended up jumping in the pool to get him to stop, but he came splashing in right behind you. When he swam over to you, he grabbed you and you clung into him. "Remember the tee ball pool party?" you asked as he swiped his hair back from his forehead.

"Remember it? Kitten, that was our first kiss."

You bit your lip and pressed the tip of your nose to his. "Got a little spicy in the clubhouse kitchen."

"Bob caught us," he said with a smirk, wrapping his arms around your waist and carrying you over to the side of the pool. "He knew I was head over heels."

"I was so embarrassed!"

"And just think, pretty soon he'll probably be your brother-in-law. Uncle Bob."

You smothered his face in kisses and said, "I love my family."

And you really meant it, even as you were squeezing into the stretchy bodycon dress Molly had packed so you could go to dinner. It didn't look as good on you as it did on her, but it honestly wasn't terrible. 

"Holy shit," Bradley grunted. "Molly needs to let you borrow that indefinitely."

You rolled your eyes. "She's going to want it back. I'm sure Bob-"

"Do not finish that sentence!" he practically shouted. "I want to enjoy the erection I'm going to have later, okay?"

You started laughing as you covered your mouth with your hand. "Let me finish my makeup, and then we can go." You touched up your mascara and your lipstick. Okay, now you did look pretty hot. Tight red dress. Red lips. Dark eye makeup. 

"Ready?" you asked, strolling out of the bathroom and slipping your feet into your black heels. Your eyes settled on a wrapped box that was placed on the foot of the bed. "What's that?"

Bradley's smirk made your heart race. "Just a little something I got for you. For us."

You pressed your lips together. "Am I allowed to open it now?"

But he shook his head. "It's strictly for after dinner, Kitten."

Your mind was racing. Maybe he got you some kind of new lingerie? Or a toy? You thought of so many sexy things as he led you downstairs to the restaurant with his hand on your butt. 

When you looked up at him through your lashes, he whispered, "You look perfect." The thing was, you felt perfect. You had never felt a fraction of this love and excitement with Danny. You never felt starved for attention now, and neither did Everett. You felt adored and listened to and understood. It made you want to do something crazy like drop to your knees and give him a blowjob in the elevator. 

You managed to hold it together as you did have to ride down to the wine cellar restaurant with an elderly couple. But just barely. You let your knuckles graze Bradley's cock through his pants with intent. And he grunted in response, his pupils blown wide. 

"Just wait, Kitten." His voice sounded threatening, and you had to squeeze your thighs together. And that feeling didn't improve as you and he sat side by side with glasses of merlot and an enormous steak that you shared along with countless sides and crusty bread that made your mouth water. 

"I love it here," you told him before he fed you some steak from his fork. "This  is my favorite dinner. And the wine is incredible."

He kissed your cheek and let his lips and mustache trail back closer to your ear. "Get as tipsy as you want, Baby. But don't get drunk. I'm going to need your consent for what's in that little box on the bed, okay?"

A shiver ran through your body as you turned to face him. He had his hand on your thigh, tucked up underneath the tiny dress, and his mustache felt rough against the shell of your ear. 

"Okay," you agreed. But after another glass of wine, you could barely keep your lips off of him in the dimly lit restaurant. You were honestly so ready to go back to the room when he held up a dessert menu.

"What would you like?" he asked, stroking your leg. "I'll be having your pussy for dessert, but why don't you pick out something sweet to take back up to the room?"

You couldn't remember what you ordered, but it must have been cheesecake. You were holding the to-go container and rubbing yourself all over Bradley in the elevator twenty minutes later. He had lipstick on his shirt collar, and the top few buttons were undone. He was flushed a pretty shade of pink, and you arrived back at your floor just as your hand went to the button on his pants. 

The wine went to your head, but you weren't quite drunk. But it was hard to walk in your heels now, so Bradley carried you as you held your cheesecake. "Are you gonna fuck me, Coach?" you asked when he reached the door and unlocked it with one hand. 

He kissed you and set you down as the door closed behind you. "I want to, Kitten. But first, I'm going to get changed, and then you can open that box, okay?"

You nodded and watched him undress before pulling on just a pair of gray sweatpants. "Why are you putting clothes back on?" you whined stomping one high heel on the floor. 

He chuckled and shrugged. "It's gonna be a minute before we get down to it. And I don't want to distract you, Baby. Now come here." He pulled you closer by your hips before letting his hands slide down to the bottom of the dress. Slowly, he pulled the fabric up your body and over your head. You moaned, completely bare for him. "Fucking gorgeous," he whispered, running his fingers down the valley between your breasts. 

When you tried to kick your heels off, you whined his name, "Bradley, please. I want to open the box." The gold wrapping paper looked so enticing. 

"In a minute," he promised, kissing your shoulder. "How do you feel about keeping the high heels on?"

You looked up at him with wide, innocent eyes. "I'll keep them on for you."

"They'll match perfectly," he crooned, sucking gently on your neck. "With these." He reached for the box and handed it to you, his cheeks still flushed with pink. 

But now your husband looked a little apprehensive as you tore into the gold paper and gently removed the top of the box. You gasped, gaping up at him before looking back down at the pretty burgundy velvet with gold accents. "You want me to...wear these?" you asked him in barely a whisper.

He ran his hands slowly up and down your sides. "Yes. The collar has your name on it."

You set the box on the bed and pulled out the matching collar and leash. There was a charm dangling off the collar. Mrs. Bradshaw. 

"But only if you want to, Kitten," Bradley reassured you in his sweet voice. 

You let the warm velvet and the cool metal meet your hands for a few seconds. They were pretty. You liked them. You liked the idea of wearing them. When you looked up at him, you held your hands out. "Put them on me?"

-----------------------------

Bradley was actually living in his wildest fantasy at the moment. He was married. To you. He had a home and a family. And he was very gently tightening a collar around your neck while he placed soft kisses to your bare shoulder. 

"Fuck," he groaned, pulling away to get a good look. You were nibbling nervously on your lip, your hand coming up to feel the charm. The tag. You were tagged with his name. His cock was so hard in his sweatpants, he thought he might cum right now. And he hadn't even finished clasping the leash to your pretty collar yet.

Both were a deep red velvet, so satisfying looking against his skin. And once the leash was hooked on, he was throbbing.

"How do I look, Coach?"

"Mmm, you look like my sexy Kitten. Will you let me take some pictures of this? Maybe a little video? Use it to get me through my next deployment."

"Of course," you said, rubbing yourself against him as he held his camera up and took a few photos. 

"God damn," he groaned. "You look incredible, Baby." Then you took the end of the leash and put it in his hand. 

"Don't be too rough," you whispered, kissing the corner of his lips. 

"Never, Kitten," he promised, backing up toward the couch. As soon as you felt the tug, you followed him, your high heels clicking across the marble floor tiles. He loved the sound of it. He loved the look of you. And when he sank down onto the couch, he took a few more photos before tossing his phone aside. "Come on up here," he whispered, rubbing his thigh. "I know you like this."

You were practically purring as you straddled his thigh and eased yourself down so your perfect pussy was resting on his sweatpants. Bradley shortened the leash and yanked softly until your tits bounced and you slid higher on his leg. And then you started to grind, and Bradley kissed along your collar as he kept the leash taut. 

"I knew your pussy would be on the menu."

When you let our head tip back, he pulled a little harder on the leash so you were whining as he cupped your ass. "This is exactly what I wanted to do on the couch."

"God, Kitten. You're a dream come true."

He let you lean forward to kiss his lips and play with the hair at the back of his neck. You tasted like wine. Your nipples were hard. Your pussy was soaking his pants. Intoxicating. 

Then you whispered, "I'm your pet," before you delicately licked his mustache. 

"Jesus Christ," he grunted as you licked his cheek and his ear like a cat. You were the hottest thing he'd ever witnessed, and you were riding his thigh. "Lick my cock," he commanded, tugging on your leash until you were forced down between his legs. 

You looked up at him and then started to lick at the wet spot you left on his pants, and Bradley was helpless to force you to stop. Your tits were bouncing as you licked up your silky wetness before reaching for the elastic band and pulling his pants down. You pulled his sweatpants clean off of him and wrapped both hands around his aching cock. His tip was so red, it looked purple. 

When Bradley yanked on the leash, you licked the underside of his tip and looked up at him. Every little kitten lick sent a jolt of pleasure through him. He was panting your name as sweat broke out on his face and chest. "You're the hottest thing I've ever seen, Baby." Truly, the sight before him was almost too much. He reached for his phone again and started recording a video. 

You looked at the camera, licking him with short strokes of your tongue and smiling a little sheepishly. "Tell me, who's big cock are you licking, Kitten?" 

Then you whimpered and said, "My husband's."

"A little louder, Baby," he said, snapping the leash, making you whine. 

"My husband's big cock!"

"God, I love you." Now you were taking him between your lips and sucking on him. He let you go for a few minutes, enjoying the sight of that little gold charm hitting your perfect skin as you bobbed and gagged. But he knew what else he wanted to do as he set his phone down again.

When he yanked on your leash, you responded instantly, releasing him from your mouth with a little pop. "Go climb up on the bed, Kitten." He let the leash out a bit so you could stand, and then he stood and pulled you toward the bed. "You like this, don't you?"

"I love it," you replied with a grin before you crawled up onto the bed on your hands and knees. You knew what to do. You presented him with your ass and pussy. You were his pet right now. His very well behaved pet. His cock was still wet from your saliva, and when he pushed himself inside you, he yanked that leash back. 

"Bradley!" you screeched, barely able to keep your hands on the bedding with how he was making your back arch. 

"You can do it, Baby. I know you can." As he stood there and fucked you, he watched you spread your legs a little wider. Your back arched beautifully. Your fingertips scraped for purchase on the bedding. "That's it."

Bradley fucked you so hard as he pulled on the leash, you couldn't even talk. But you were grinding back into him as you made little sounds. He was addicted to this. He let his free hand come up to rest on your lower back before easing it down along your ass. So close. He was so close. Your pussy was gripping him, and it was the most beautiful sight. He could watch this all night long. But he was going to cum. 

He let go of the leash, grabbing at both hips as he started to slow his thrusts down. "Fuck!" he barked leaning down to kiss along your collar. And he filled you up, rubbing his hands along that pretty ass before watching his cum drip out of your pussy and onto the bedding. 

You rolled onto your back and reached for him, that Mrs. Bradshaw charm shining in the lamplight. When you made no more to unclip the least or take off the collar, Bradley crawled onto the bed next to you. "I love you," he whispered, gathering you against him with so many kisses, feeling your high heel graze his calf.

"We'll do that again, right?" you asked, raking your fingers through his hair. 

"Whenever you want it," he promised. "I'd give you anything. You must know that."

You closed your eyes and smiled. "Feed me the cheesecake."

A minute later, Bradley was sitting back against the headboard with your back pressed to his chest. He had his arms wrapped around you, holding the fork and the container, and you were taking bites and moaning softly. You were still wearing your collar. 

"I can't believe we have to go home tomorrow." You opened your mouth for more of your dessert. 

"I miss Ev," he whispered, earning a kiss to his chin. "And I can't have him riding around in Bob's truck too much, or he might start to like it better than the Bronco."

"Never," you gasped, and Bradley fed you the last bite. Then you yawned, and he helped you get ready for bed. "You wore me out again, Coach."

"We're just getting started."

---------------------------

Late the next morning, after a very leisurely room service breakfast and sex in the shower, you and Bradley were on the road back to San Diego. Your body was so sore, and you were wearing Bradley's gray sweatpants and one of his undershirts. Molly really was the best sister in the world for only packing you the necessities. 

You had your hand resting on Bradley's on the seat between you while you sipped some coffee. The radio was playing an oldies station, and Bradley knew all the words. The desert was giving way to some suburbs and you thought you should text Molly and Bob and let them know you'd be there soon. 

When Bradley flipped his hand over and tightened his grip on yours, you turned to him with an expectant look. His voice was deep and steady as he said, "So what's the plan? How soon can I adopt Ev?"

Your heart was so full that now it was overflowing. "I'll call my lawyer tomorrow." 

"First thing tomorrow," he replied with a smile. "Thanks for sharing your son with me."

You wanted to thank Bradley for loving Everett, but as tears stung your eyes, you just couldn't. Because this was just simply what you and Ev should have had all along. Now you were both getting top tier adoration, but you deserved nothing less. 

"Yeah," you whispered, leaning across the seat to kiss his cheek while he drove. "I'll call first thing in the morning."

----------------------------

Just sitting here thinking about Coach Bradley wearing a collar and leash of his very own. Thanks to @beyondthesefourwalls and @mak-32

PART 31

Don't forget to check out Bob and Molly in The Curveball!

@hotch-meeeeeuppppp

@swthxrry

@chassy21

@yaboid19

@solacestyles

@avoirlecoupdefoudre

@daisyhollyxox

@harper1666

@throwinsauce

@awesomebooklover17

@wintercap89

@whosyourgnomie4

@rosesinmars

@blog-name6996

@bcon24

@wishfulwithwine

@backinwonderl4nd

@tetragonia

@gingerbreadandpaper

@emptyloverofmine

@chaoticassidy

@missmirandafe

@changlingkhat

@sugarcoated-lame

@callsign-jupiter

@avada-kedavra-bitch-187

@katiebby04

@marantha

@averyhotchner

@abaker74

@andycanbeemotional

@heli991113

@k-k0129

@noz4a2

@tallyovie

@shanimallina87

@starlightstories

@teddyluvs2sing

@little-wiseone

@ccbb2222

@lilyevanswhore

@o-the-o-grim-o-reaper-o

@xoxabs88xox

[dwellordream]

Books Recs of 2024

The Tainted Cup by Robert Jackson Bennett. Mystery/fantasy centered around Din, a young assistant investigator assigned to help an eccentric and infamous detective, Ana Dolabra, solve a series of murders. Din is an engraver, his brain altered so he has a photographic memory. However, no one is quite sure how he got his current position, since he failed every single one of his final exams except the combat portion. Ana is an exceedingly odd woman who refuses to go to any crime scene in person and often performs mad science experiments in her spare time. As Din struggles to keep up with the case, which revolves around a bioweapon being unleashed on a series of the empire's best engineers, he also worries what will happen when Ana finally uncovers his secrets.

Highfire by Eoin Colfer. Urban fantasy (very comedic fantasy) about a dragon called Vern (short for Wyvern), who teams up with a juvenile delinquent named Squib (real name Everett Moreau) to take down a corrupt sheriff who is plaguing the Lousiana bayou. Vern is a very small (seven feet long) dragon who is the last of his kind (as far as he knows). When he is spotted by a local troubled teen, his first instinct is to hunt Squib down and kill him, but he quickly realizes the two of them have a common enemy- the murderous sheriff who is running drugs through their territory.

The Last Tale of the Flower Bride by Roshani Chokshi. Magical realism about a romantic-minded art historian who is swept off his feet by a mysterious and charming heiress. After a whirlwind courtship, the happy couple return to her childhood home; a Gothic manor on a lonely island. The more time our narrator spends around his wife's past, the more questions are raised- increasingly sinister ones about who she is and what exactly she is capable of. Once upon a time, she was best friends with an equally odd and dreamy little girl named Indigo. But no one has seen Indigo for many years now- and the Flower Bride may be behind her disappearance.

Chlorine by Jade Song. Horror/magical realism. Since childhood, Ren's entire identity has been wrapped up in swimming. If she can be strong enough, fast enough, special enough, success is sure to come her way. As the end of high school approaches, Ren's passion for swimming becomes less about her future, and more about past legends of mermaids and sirens dragging sailors into the deep. School, friends, and her parents' expectations all fall away- Ren will make her home in the water, no matter what she has to do.

We Are Not Like Them by Christine Pride & Jo Piazza. Realistic fiction. Jen and Riley have been best friends for as long as they can remember, despite their vastly different childhoods. Riley is from a middle class Black family; Jen was raised by an impoverished white single mother. After twenty years of doing almost everything together, their lives are at a crossroads- Riley is a news anchor about to take Philadelphia by storm, while Jen is expecting her first child with her police officer husband. When Jen's husband is involved in the murder of a Black teenage boy by a fellow officer, Riley finds herself expected to cover the story- and Jen finds herself expected to answer for her husband's actions- and her own beliefs about what racism looks like.

Queenpin by Megan Abbott. Crime thriller/noir. Our nameless heroine lives a mousy existence working as a bookkeeper for a rundown local night club, but her life is turned upside down when the infamous Gloria Denton, a gun moll and smuggler, takes her under her wing. Gloria transforms her young protege from a timid girl to a sophisticated, cunning woman capable of handling gangsters, conmen, thieves, and bookies, but when she falls for the wrong man, her relationship with Gloria is strained, and they must decide just how far they can trust one another.

Everyone Knows Your Mother is a Witch by Rivka Galchen. Historical fiction. Based on the real life trial of Katharina Kepler, mother of the famed Johannes Kepler, Imperial Mathematician to the Holy Roman Empire. Katharina is a busybody, a domineering and devilishly clever woman with a particular talent for healing. She is also a fiercely loyal mother to her adult children, but when an old neighborhood grudge flares into accusations of poison and witchcraft, Katharina is determined not to meekly confess and beg pardon. The more she lashes out at her neighbors and the authorities, the more charges begin to pile up against her- despite her son's desperate attempts to save her from torture and execution.

Bury Me Deep by Megan Abbott. Crime thriller/noir. Based on a real life murder case in 1931 Phoenix Arizona. Naive and sheltered Marion Seeley is deposited in Phoenix by her disgraced doctor husband, who is forced to take a job with a mining company in South America after his medical license is revoked. Marion befriends the vivacious Louise and Ginny, two fellow nurses, who introduce her to the underground party scene in Phoenix. Politicians and businessmen flock to the secret parties held by them, and it's a quick way to make money on the side. Drawn in by the luxury and thrills, Marion falls in love with Joe Lanigan, a powerful local politician, but as their affair intensifies, her friendship with the other women fractures, culminating in a gruesome crime.

[eggmizel]

i am not fucking processing todays episode so here's a TMK idea I had earlier: Middle school au. They're Like That cause they're fucking 14.

Lucia's autistic and doesn't really have any friends and is convinced everyone hates her

Jin is on the football team, Trey is on the soccer(?) team because they be on the same team without getting distracted and fighting (they're in the same martial arts class outside of school to get some energy out)

Everett is this broody little shit who will fucking bite you, he keeps getting called into the office cause he draws his sonic oc killing people

They meet in some sort of anime club

[fanartandfanfiction]

Hogwarts Legacy modern AU

I was thinking about the school dances I went to, then how each character would act. Idk what kind of dances you all had, but ours were WILD. Basically raves with formal wear.

Ominis: Only there because MC begged him. The music is too loud and it makes him anxious to be in such a packed place, but he’ll begrudgingly accept when MC asks him to dance.

Sebastian: He’s in the middle of the dance floor. He’s a ball of pure energy and will ditch his shoes, coat, and tie as the night progresses.

Garreth: The goofy dancer. Will probably try to spike the punch, but then he’s out there doing the robot, the lawnmower….

Leander: Desperately wants to ask MC to dance but is terrified of looking foolish. Stays mostly on the sidelines.

Poppy: Dancing with her friends and having fun, not usually her scene, but she’s ready to cut loose.

Imelda: Doesn’t really have any interest in dancing, but MC will eventually talk her into a few.

Amit: A shockingly good dancer. No one expected it, no one expected him to even come, but now the crowd is cheering his name.

Everett: That one guy who tries (and fails) to do the worm.

BONUS:

Sharp: If he has to pry one more couple apart, he’s quitting his job and moving to another country. Only surviving the night with the flask of fire whiskey in his pocket, which Garreth will attempt to steal.

Fig: Godrick’s heart, what are those kids doing?! Is that dancing? Is that what dancing is these days? He’s seen things he can’t unsee now, including Garreth attempting to twerk on MC.

[cordd]

Randomly remembered ur clone high bill gates art, im kinda obsessed w the concept of silicon valley clone high..

i would post more but im kinda tisming out over mickey 17 right now. BUT HEY. here are some more things of note for that au.

bill’s clone is named Everett. why? he wanted to feel unique. he’s also heavily based off the riddler and he’s freaky as fuck. if you like weird super toxic middle aged yaoi… Hes your Guy.

steve has two clones, which were made accidentally. his personality was too contradicting (bpd) to itself, causing the cloning to malfunction, and his brain to “split” for lack of a better term… so he has a more sociable and relatively understanding copy, and a meaner, more pragmatic one. they’re both equally as bitchy though. left brain right brain sorta thing.

ummmm im sorta working on a thing where rhey actually go to high school because (as of right now) they just do bullshit in an office because bill didnt know what to do with them (projection much. idfk where to put them.)

[fulltidalwavecomputer]

Oh goodness I found this ARG like... earlier this week thanks to that Wifies guy. I did come up with a small theory of my own, after some thought. It's hard to choose a favorite character since there's only three and they're all p cool, but I do like Smiler/Everette. So glad there's an official name for that guy now.

I put the theory beneath the cut :P

Uhhh well... You remember when Andrew said he knew an Everette? Or the name at least sounded familiar. Do people think that's red herring or? Because I don't think it could be a coincidence or just random info. Look, he says that he never lived anyway snowy and didn't recognise the house, but that world was made for christmas and he noted how old the building looks now.

Funnily enough, we don't actually know that much about Andrew outside of minecraft. Like, he's the main character but we haven't seen parts of his life from an outside perspective like with the other two. And now we're back in his old world with Chris... wonder if we'll learn more about his past now? We know that he has a family and goes to school, and Chris (who lives on the East coast himself) says he lives on the West coast which is presumably referring to America. Other than that, we probably know more about Everette's home life than anyone else's. We don't know which state any of them live in actually, the only one mentioned is Arizona where Oliver moved to and he isn't even really a character aside from a random name drop atm. Btw Arizona a southern-western state I looked it up.

But then there's also the stuff with the Lethe protocol affecting Andrew's memory, and for all we know parts of his memory could've gotten erased before. Accidently or on purpose. Or he just, you know gets older and forgets stuff.

So here's my wild speculation:

Maybe Andrew and Oliver are the same person somehow? Like he could've just been a classmate of Smiler's or maybe even one of the bullies but I don't think so. Neither really work imo. But that got me thinking, what if the reason "Oliver" had to move to Arizona was because his family needed to escape something? I've got no clue how witness protection works but those who are in danger often have to hide their identities right? Both of the other characters have their respective traumas outside of the well-related stuff and it makes sense for Andrew to have past baggage too. There's no real evidence yet but again, there's no real reason for him to bring it up either at the moment.

Or maybe he's been going by his middle name or smth the whole time idfk. I'm not sure why Everette would refer to his friend with a fake name in a video made for him, unless it was a nickname??? Ehhh I doubt it. He'd only know him by his birth name in school. What's really funny to imagine is any memes that might get made about "the biggest plot twist is Andrew isn't even his real name 😱!!" He's only ever gotten referred to as Andrew so far though, if Smiler recognises him then he's keeping his mouth shut.

It's... what actually is the Lethe protocol? Did Chris build it? Why was it made and why does Andrew have a subject number? Chris also had a subject number in Into The Mind... We know he's a tech guy but I doubt he'd be able to create a machine in minecraft that can erase a living person's memory. I feel like there's still a lot of loose threads that need to be tied up, and I'm hyped to discover all the pieces.

Tell me if I'm missing anything because I must confess I've only watched the latest videos after Wifies' summary. For example I didn't actually know Chris had a creeper skin when he played with Andrew, so the bit where his ghost puts on the head didnt quite click on first watch. But yeah, I'm glad I found this ARG because it slaps ✨

...

Also how old even are the characters what is the timeline I- ???

[unusuallysweetaki]

Long haired middle school untanned Everett, because I can.

Used to HC with friends that he was an insecure bean who essentially went plastic (watch mean girls 2004) for popularity sake

[legacyshenanigans]

Back stories and information for the other lads HC 💚

Really wanted to do this, don't know why 😊

Garreth Weasley:

Parents' names: Genevieve and Patrick Weasley.

Siblings: 3 older sisters, Victoria, Erin & Rihannon.

Blood Status: Pureblood

Life in general: Garreth is a farm boy. He's always lived in the country side, and his family are very modest and humble folk, living out in the middle of nowhere, and like most wizards and witches living in the wizarding world Garreth was homeschooled until Hogwarts and didn't really spend alot of time around other kids. He had his older sisters, and Rhiannon in particular whos only 15 months older than him enjoyed the same things as him, they would spend their time in the garden making mud pies and "potions" out of whatever they could find.

Leander Prewett:

Parents names: Leanna and Andrew Prewett.

Siblings: Younger brother, Oliver.

Blood status: Pureblood.

Life in General: Leander is another country side boy, but grew up alot more privileged than Garreth, his parents had good money, and sent him to a muggle private school until Hogwarts which he didn't really enjoy because it meant he couldn't do magic on the regular, but whenever he came home he'd do nothing BUT magic, Leander and his brother were very spoilt children, and were always in competition for their parents affection and validation.

Amit Thakkar:

Parents names: Sarika and Madhav Thakkar

Siblings: Only child.

Blood status: Muggle born

Life in general: Amit was born in India, where he spent most of his younger childhood, at the age of 8 he started showing signs of magical ability, which he kept secret from his parents in worry that they would disown him, at the age of 9 he finally found the courage to tell them, and they were thrilled! Which surprised him, they moved to Britain when Amit was 10, and he started at Hogwarts the following year.

Everett Clopton:

Parents names: Jacqueline and Borris Clopton.

Siblings: Younger sister, Beatrice.

Blood status: Half blood

Life in general: Everett grew up in the muggle world and went to muggle school until he was 11. His magic was always evident though, and his mother (a witch) would often teach him things she knew when he was growing up. His muggle father didn't mind the whole "magic thing" but tired to keep out of that side of things, his younger sister has no magic abilities, and would often argue with Everett whenever he pulled magic pranks on her.

~

[lboogie1906]

Mayor James Everett Chase (March 29, 1914 – May 19, 1987) businessman and politician, was born the youngest of seven children in Wharton, Texas. During the Great Depression, he became an enrollee at a Civilian Conservation Corps camp in El Paso. He migrated to Spokane with fellow Texans, Elmo Dalbert and Harry Blackwell. He found a job shining shoes at a white barbershop.

He married Eleanor Barrow (1942). They had a child. During WWII, his employment situation improved. He repaired military vehicles at Spokane’s Geiger Air Field and in 1945 partnered with Elmo Dalbert to open Chase and Dalbert Body and Fender.

He served at different times as president and vice president of the Spokane Branch of the NAACP. He brought Rosa Parks in as a guest speaker in 1956 and through the media he addressed local civil rights abuses in employment and housing.

His political career began in 1969 when he lost his first bid for a seat on the City Council. He tried again in 1975 and was successful, becoming the city’s second Black City Council member. He advocated transparency in city government, increased recreational facilities for children, and more social services for the elderly.

In 1980 he entered the Spokane mayoral race. On November 3, 1981, he garnered 60.52 percent of the vote to become the first African American mayor of Spokane. His remarkable victory occurred in a city with a Black population of 1.5 percent of the total population.

He supported the “1% for Art” program which sponsored the display of artwork in city buildings. He managed the city through tough economic times. His advocacy of children contributed to the creation of a youth commission and the passage of a swimming pool bond. He announced that he would seek re-election.

For his life’s work in Spokane, City officials named the main art gallery in City Hall after him, and Spokane School District 81 named a middle school in his honor. #africanhistory365 #africanexcellence

[disappointingyet]

One thing to make clear from the start – this is a list of my favourite films of the year, emphasis on ‘my’. I wanted to stress that because there’s at least one movie on this list that almost everybody else thinks is terrible. Just so you know. 

The more practical point is that these are UK 2024 releases, so it includes films that I saw in 2023 and doesn’t include ones I saw this year but haven’t been released here yet.

It hasn’t seemed like a great year for the kind of films I enjoy – there might be a reason why, maybe that’s random or perhaps I just haven’t seen enough movies. But it feels like I’ve seen a lot, more than any year since 2020 at least. As in recent years, I’ve put together two lists of other stuff I’ve seen – you can find the more or less mainstream here and arthouse and documentaries here. 

Things I haven’t seen include the trio of movies that supposedly saved the industry in November (Wicked, Moana 2 and Gladiator II); assorted latest instalments in exhaustingly long-running series (Deadpool & Wolverine, the latest Apes movie, the latest Godzilla x Kong, the third Venom etc); some awardsy films (Bird, Sing Sing, Taste Of Things…) But there was nothing I actively wanted to see that I missed, other than maybe Black Dog. 

1 American Fiction

My favourite film of the year because it does two very difficult things well – thoughtful family comedy-drama and wild satire – and never (to me) feels unbalanced.* The hook is the satire bit – frustrated highbrow novelist (Jeffrey Wright) writes a spoof ghetto tale that the white literary world mistakes for the ‘real’ thing. But enjoyable as that is, what makes this film special is that other side of it, the upper-middle-class family dealing with an aging  parent and other tough stuff, is every bit as strong (and often as funny). Great work from the whole cast but particularly from Sterling K Brown as the protagonist’s brother, newly out in middle age and gleefully making up for lost time.

*Also maybe fuelled by a bit of smugness because I read Erasure, the novel this is based on, two decades ago and between this film and his award-winning latest, James, it seems the rest of the world is finally getting hip to Perceval Everett.   

Full review here

2 Hit Man

Richard Linklater is one of the more inconsistent veteran directors, but that’s partly because he’s often trying something different rather than having a reliable formula that he sticks to – it’s a career that stretches from a big hit that became an Andrew Lloyd Webber musical(!) (School Of Rock) to a plotless animated philosophical musing that caused the biggest walk-out at a press screening I have ever seen (Waking Life). Hit Man is one of the successes, a comedy about a geeky academic who moonlights with the cops impersonating a hit man for hire for small-scale sting operations, and discovers he has untapped gifts for impersonation and improvisation. Is it funny? It very much is. Full review here

(Netflix)

3 Anora

I came to Anora with low expectations despite the buzz (won Cannes! Critics swooning!) mostly because I loathed Sean Baker’s previous film Red Rocket (as in, hated it so much I hit fast-forward because I didn’t want to waste more time with these characters.)

But the consensus is right on this movie: it’s excellent. Goes like this: Ivan (Mark Eydelshteyn), idiot son of a Russian oligarch becomes besotted with New York lap dancer Ani (Mikey Madison) and hires her to be his girlfriend for a week. This is a comedy with a bit (certainly less than I expected) of drama, played beautifully by the two stars plus Ivan’s dad’s hapless Stateside crew (particularly Yura Borisov – I’m presuming I was one of no more than a handful of people watching this thinking ‘Blimey, it’s the Russian dude from Compartment No6!’). 

I feel a combination of the title, the awards noise, and terms like ‘sex work’ and ‘oligarch’ all add up to make Anora sound so much heavier than it really is. This is fun – I didn’t even notice how long it is.

4 Kneecap 

There’s a lot that’s familiar about Kneecap if you’ve watched any post-Trainspotting jokey crime or youth culture or both films (hello Human Traffic! Whatcha Lock Stock! Not to mention, straying into TV, Shameless) from this side of pond. And yet Kneecap works better than almost anything that has gone before. Part of this must be to do with the fact that Kneecap (the Belfast Irish-language hip-hop act) play themselves in Kneecap (the movie.) Now, there’s a long history of people being terrible at playing themselves but Kneecap are Beatles-in-Hard-Day’s-Night good. Plus, there’s the sense of authenticity that comes with their distinctly unHollywood bodies on show. And maybe the biggest differentiator is the utterly sincere message of the film – its celebration and promotion of the Irish language.

The plot is (presumably highly fictionalised – although the archive footage at the end aims to suggest otherwise) an account of the origins and unlikely rise of Kneecap, of how two small-time dealers and a schoolteacher took on the cops, the political establishment and idiot dissident republicans to become at least locally famous. 

Judging from the film, the group’s lyrics are mostly lists of the drugs that they have taken, but the shows seem pretty good. Mo Chara/Liam Óg Ó Hannaidh, in particular, is excellent. Micheal Fassbender pops up to give a bit of heavyweight support as one of the lads’ freedom fighter/terrorist dad. 

Surprisingly ace.

5 The Holdovers

Alexander Payne and Paul Giamatti make a film together for the first time since Sideways. The set-up: grouchy teacher at a boarding school has to spend Christmas looking after handful of boys whose parents are otherwise occupied. Payne’s stated aim is to make a film that’s not just set in the 1970s but could have been made then. I was pretty sceptical early on when it’s clear that the characters will end up learning something about life/people etc, but in the end, it’s consistently funny enough and sharp enough to overcome its sentimental tendencies.

Full review here

6 Poor Things

To me, there seem to have been three stages of Yorgos Lanthimos’ career: critically admired European art-house weirdo, European art-house weirdo making films in English with surprisingly big stars and finally European art-house weirdo making films people who don’t have a MUBI subscription have seen. Stage 3 arrived with The Favourite, which teamed him up with Emma Stone and Aussie playwright/screenwriter Tony McNamara. Those three are back together for Poor Things, an eccentric fable about a child-woman’s adventures and misadventures in Europe at the end of the 19th century. 

In its world creation, Poor Things is reminiscent of the work of a pair of now unfashionable directors: Tim Burton and Terry Gilliam. (I mean, I’m not sure their style is out of favour so much as their behaviour – Gilliam – their associates’ behaviour – Burton – and how long it is since either made a properly good movie?*) it’s a gorgeous film – parts in black & white, parts in colour, both lovely to look at, at least when grotesque stuff isn’t happening on screen. The setting is gently steampunk and firmly art nouveau.

One of the things that makes this very different from a Burton film is the interest in politics  – this is a movie with a good means -of-production joke. If you’ve seen McNamara’s consistently funny and smart TV series The Great, you’ll know how good he is at this stuff. 

Something else The Great doesn’t stint on is sex but even that show feels comparatively tame compared to Poor Things. Put bluntly, film historians have been searching the grubbier corners of their minds to think of a movie in which a major female Hollywood star has as many sex scenes as Emma Stone does here. These are played for comedic effect – we’re not talking something comparable to Sharon Stone (no relation, to my knowledge) in Basic Instinct. But she does spend a lot of time undressed and engaged in what the character calls ‘furious jumping’. 

It’s mannered, it’s weird but ultimately it’s really good. *I drafted this before Beetlejuice Beetlejuice, but I think the point stands.

7 Showing Up

Two things are happening in this film. We’re getting a tour of an arts & craft college in Portland, Oregon, seeing people allowed to be creative in what seems a happy and generally low-pressure, nurturing environment. 

Within this groovy setting, though, Lizzy (Michelle Williams) is having a stressy week: she’s got a sculpture show coming up and hasn’t finished most of the works, her apartment doesn’t have hot water and her landlord/colleague/friend Jo (Hong Chau) says she’s too busy preparing for her own exhibitions to deal with it right now. And that’s just the start of what’s putting Lizzy on edge, although the rest another kind of person could have chosen not to get involved with. 

Showing Up is the fourth film Williams has made with director Kelly Reichardt: it’s less traumatic than Wendy & Lucy and Meek’s Cutoff, and by contrast with Certain Women, it focuses on one character. All of Reichardt’s films are good (if you don’t mind a slow-moving movie), some are just more gentle on the viewer than others. I found Showing Up made me somewhat anxious but the backdrop is calming, and the cast is full of welcome (for me, anyway) presences: Andre Benjamin, Judd Hirsch, James LeGros, John Magaro (the husband in Past Lives). Like most Reichardt films, it’s stuck with me.

8 Drive-Away Dolls

You are duly warned: critical consensus is that this film is a stinker. The view of people I know whose opinions I respect is that this movie sucks. But I went to see it with a friend and we laughed steadily the whole way through, so here (unapologetically) it is.

As far as the filmmakers are concerned, the title of the movie is Drive-Away Dykes. Those filmmakers are Ethan Coen (ie, half of the Coen brothers) and his wife Tricia Cooke. I’m not big on the relevance of biographies of the folks behind films but here it’s probably worth mentioning that when Coen first asked Cooke out on a date she said something like ‘Dude, you know I’m gay, right?’

Drive-Away Dolls/Dykes is a trashy, silly, trippy, extremely dirty road comedy. Gleefully promiscuous Jamie (Margaret Qualley) and her uptight chum Marian (Geraldine Viswanathan) are doing that American thing where instead of renting a car, you drive one across the country to its new owner. But the car they were given has something mysterious in the trunk/boot and soon there are sadistic bad guys on their trail. Assorted improbable things happen, there are some great character actor bits and good cameos.

For context, I was always a fan of the Coens ‘ dafter movies: I love Burn After Reading and like Intolerable Cruelty. Maybe this one just caught me in the right mood. Or maybe everyone else is wrong. Probably not, but maybe…

9 All We Imagine As Light

Prabha (Kani Kusruti) and Anu (Divya Prabha) are flatmates and nurses at a Mumbai hospital. Prabha is the older, serious one, Anu more fun. We see them at work, Prabha helps a friend (Chhaya Kadam) who is fighting eviction from the place she’s lived for two decades and Anu goes on dates with her not-so-secret-secret boyfriend. And that’s pretty much it – this is a film mostly of small moments and strong atmosphere. I worried occasionally it was going to get tubthumpy but it stays smartly away from that, and ends up as a sweetly affecting work. (Worth clarifying that although this was made in India by an Indian director, it’s technically French-Belgian-Luxembourgian-Indian production, so a European arthouse flick rather than a product of Indian film industry.)

10 Babes

For about 10 minutes, I was sceptical that I was going to enjoy this film. It seemed to be assuming that you’d already bought into writer-star Ilana Glazer’s shtick and I hadn’t – Broad City just made me feel old and long stretches of characters just repeating the same word in different ways doesn’t automatically have me in stitches. But I hung in there, and it turns out that Glazer and director Pamela Adlon have created something funny and endearing here.

The elements: it’s like a romcom but about a friendship, it gives us the affluent New York-iness of When Harry Met Sally complete with typeface and score but also lots and lots of stuff about shit, piss and lactation, and the characters take shrooms, which maybe they didn’t in Nora Ephron scripts?

Eden (Glazer) and Dawn (Michelle Buteau) are lifelong besties. At the start of the film, Dawn is married and very pregnant with her second kid while Eden is single. Then she gets knocked up after a one-night stand and decides she wants the kid. Dawn promises to support Eden but that turns out to be not so easy when she’s struggling with two kids. 

This just made me grin a lot…

11 Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga

Anya Taylor-Joy ≠ Charlize Theron much as Ewan bloody McGregor ≠ Alec Guinness. The story elements in this prequel are all pretty obvious and there’s noticeably more ropey CGI than in Fury Road. But that’s all ultimately of minor importance for two reasons. 

The first is that the Mad Max world remains endlessly imitated but never remotely matched in its collection of strange inhabitants – so many movies and TV shows try to do this and become instantly exhausting*, but in George Miller’s saga they are vivid and fascinating.  

The second is no one has ever made vehicle-under-attack sequences as thrilling as the ones in Fury Road and now in Furiosa. Whenever we’re racing across a scorched landscape in mutant trucks, cars and bikes, all is bliss. 

*A rare exception is a terrific Korean film called The Good, The Bad & The Weird, which is so much better than the title suggests.

12 Hundreds Of Beavers

Truly like nothing else out there, Hundreds Of Beavers Is almost entirely dialogue-free (but emphatically not soundless), black & white and set in a partially animated landscape.  The many animals are played by people in primary-school-level costumes.* The obvious reference points are silent comedy and Looney Tunes cartoons although I also thought of Benny Hill, Michel Gondry and Wallace and Gromit. 

Our protagonist is an enthusiastic drinker trying to survive in somewhere in the snowy North American wilderness in the 18th or 19th century. His early attempts to hunt beavers, rabbits and fish are Elmer Fudd hapless. I was wondering how they would get a 1 hour 48 minute movie out of this, but a few more characters and bits of story are added although it remains pretty simple.

I think if you stumbled on this unknowingly, you might be baffled. But just the title is enough to alert most people that something weird is on the menu if not what flavour of weird. And for those in the right mindset, this will be a delight. *Probably the only way someone as sappy as I am could enjoy a film in which vast numbers of animals are killed. 

13 The Book Of Clarence

Would I claim that this is a film that works consistently? Very much not. It’s definitely hit-and-miss, but for me it hit more than it missed, and stuck with me after I’d seen it. I can see why it baffles people – it’s part stoner comedy, part anachronistic but sincere Biblical parable. So we’re in Jerusalem 33CE… but our main character, Clarence (LaKeith Stanfield) is a small-time pot dealer. Needing a rapid cash injection, Clarence grasps that the boom industry of the moment is religious sects and so sets himself up as a prophet. 

I get that the first reference people are going to grab for is Life Of Brian. But I think director Jeymes Samuel’s view on all this is radically different from a bunch of hideously self-satisfied Oxbridge types (sorry, I have always loathed Monty Python). A lot (though not all) of the religious stuff is weirdly earnest – Samuel feels like he’s figuring stuff out rather than wanting to prove how clever he is. 

But think what I really like about this film is its vibe – the look, the music, the costumes and the attitude Stanfield brings. As I said, it’s a bit of a mess, but it’s a mess that I ended up liking so much more than a lot of films that undoubtedly ‘objectively’ better. 

Full review here

PS: I saw Wallace & Gromit: Vengeance Most Fowl on 2 January, so after I'd published this. If I'd seen it in time, it would definitely be somewhere in the top 10. The 2023 list

The 2022 list

The 2021 list

[budgetburials]

random headcanon generator.

Everett can drive: Everett has a valid license as issued by the state of New Jersey and can operate a vehicle to get him from place to place. That is the most that can be said for his driving.

Everett's favorite color is pink: He is red-green colorblind and does not perceive pink! He's been told he looks handsome in pink, though, which ensures the color is nevertheless in regular rotation in his wardrobe.

Everett is the gay cousin: This was true even when he was a child. He's always had a strong sense of his sexuality and outwardly been a little swishy lmao.

Everett has been to prison: He has never done hard time! He's had some friends and family go away, most notably his mother, but has avoided it himself. Now as the acting boss of his family, he has a lot of people all too happy to take the fall for him.

Everett cringes at his middle school yearbook photos: He was an incredibly cute kid and will gleefully point this out to anyone who asks. It's the high school yearbook photos that make him crawl out of his skin.

Everett is a top: Nooope. Stone bottom.

Everett is afraid of doing anything without their parents' permission: Not his biological parent's permission, but after being given the reins of the family, he leaned heavily upon his uncle for guidance and didn't trust himself to make the right decisions. His uncle empowers him to be his own man. Everett has since come into his own.

Everett listens to 80s music: Occasionally. If he's listening to 80s music, it's usually George Michael or Bon Jovi.

Everett cracks their knuckles very loudly: Finds it so gross when people crack their knuckles like this. It makes him gag.

Everett is a dog person: He's not really a pet person to begin with, and probably even less so a dog person. He's okay with well-behaved dogs who keep to themselves, but really doesn't like being jumped on or licked.

tagged by: @alonggoodbye thank you bb! tagging: ;)

[allwiredwrong]

no way is that Xander Everett.. they’re a 29-year-old HUMAN notoriously known for being argumentative  &  petty but there are some people who have seen them being Sociable &  Engaging  if you ask me, they remind me a lot of recording in the car, trying to fit broken pieces, and ignoring unknown numbers but that could just be because they’re considered the Man of a Thousand Voices around town. just keep an eye on them  &  see if their true colors shine through.. 

Name:  Xander Everett

Nickname(s):  Xan

Age: 30 (updated) (April 7)

FC: Lukas Gage

Height: 5'10

Pronouns: he/him

Orientation: pansexual

Occupation: voice actor/audiobook narrator and some modeling

District: middle

Relationship Status: chem testing

engaging ⟩ sociable

argumentative ⟩ petty

Had a fairly average upbringing

Older sibling to Miles

Didn't always know about Miles being adopted, only finding out after he'd gotten older

Doesn't know that the reason Miles ran away was after hearing an argument between him and their mom, in which Xander confronted her about still keeping him being adopted a secret and that "she was going to have to tell him eventually."

Went looking for him after discovering that he ran away.

This has lead him to the DFW area.

He has currently been paying to stay at the Hawthorne Heights Bed & Breakfast

-----

additional facts:

never went to college

started off doing voice work for friend's projects in high school

has done some side modeling since he was 19

has been an official voice actor and audiobook narrator since his early 20s.

[rainydawgradioblog]

Meet the Band: Pilot Seat

Oh hello once again, blawgers! Yes, I am back to drop one last installment of my "Meet the Band" series until spring quarter! Today, I’m excited to introduce you to another incredible local band: Pilot Seat. This indie/psych/pop trio consists of Eli Bloom (vocals and guitar), Bret Shelley (bass guitar), and Everett Farrand (drums) who sadly couldn't make the interview.

The band has been going strong for three years, starting back in their days at Shoreline High School. It all began when Shelley was releasing music on his own during junior year. A schoolmate, Bloom, discovered Shelley’s tracks and reached out to collaborate. “I was nervous to join a band since I was used to doing my own thing,” Shelley shared, “but after a couple of jam sessions, we just clicked.” The chemistry was undeniable. After a feature in their high school newspaper, the realization hit—they didn’t even have a name.

“We started looking around the studio room [Shelley’s home basement], and I saw the chair we actually produce the music in,” Shelley explained. “We call it the Pilot Seat, and that’s how the band name was born.”

By the middle of their senior year, Pilot Seat was fully up and running, culminating in the highlight of their high school journey: playing at their senior prom. When college began, the band members went their separate ways, with Shelley heading to an arts school in Portland and Bloom and Farrand enrolling at the University of Washington. Despite the distance, the band stayed committed, playing one or two shows a month and creating music during school breaks. “I’m close enough to where it’s doable,” Shelley said. “This band is really important to all three of us, and I can’t imagine not being a part of it.” Their favorite shows are house gigs, where the energy from the crowd keeps them motivated. “We love when people go berserk at house shows,” Bloom said. “It makes us give it all we’ve got because the crowd gives it right back.” 

When it comes to musical inspiration, Shelley said, “I draw a lot from jam bands like King Gizzard and the Lizard Wizard, My Bloody Valentine, and Candy Claws.” Bloom chimed in, saying, “This is always such a hard question. My parents introduced me to a lot of 60s and 70s music as a kid, so my early inspirations were The Beatles, Nirvana, and Jimi Hendrix. Over time, I’ve expanded to loving bands like My Bloody Valentine, The Police, and Mk.gee.”

Pilot Seat has had some incredible moments on stage. Shelley fondly recalled performing at the Central Saloon, saying, “It was amazing to see pictures of Alice in Chains and Nirvana on the walls and to think we played on the same stage.” Another major milestone was being part of the Sound Off showcase at Seattle’s MoPOP Museum. “Getting that call saying we made it was unreal,” Bloom said. “It was a great opportunity to connect with the local music scene and gain more exposure.” One of their wildest shows was at a church, where they were the final act of the night. After the first band’s set, a fog machine malfunctioned, triggering the fire alarm. Chaos erupted as the fire department and landlord showed up, cutting all the sets down to 15 minutes. “I just remember being fueled with rage the whole time,” Bloom laughed. “It wasn’t anger, really—just adrenaline from all the randomness. That show always makes me think, ‘How did we even do that?’”

Looking ahead, the band has big goals. Bloom shared, “In the next couple of years, we hope to tour up and down the West Coast.” They also plan to record an album this year, with a couple of songs already in the works. Shelley shared his songwriting process, saying, “I like starting with memorable bass lines, then building drums and adding synths until we have a full song.” For Bloom, creativity often strikes spontaneously. “Ideas will sit in the back of my head for a while,” he said. “Sometimes, I’ll come up with a 30-second riff on the guitar and not revisit it for five months.” The band admitted that finding lyrics can be the toughest part, but the rush of completing a song always pushes them forward.

And now, for my signature question: What do you love about music? Here’s what Pilot Seat had to say:

Eli Bloom- “There’s such a human part to music that makes me speechless, and I always think about how miserable life can be without music. Music has been an obsession since I can remember, every major experience can be correlated to a soundtrack of my life. It really defines the human experience, connecting with people through some sound instead of using words as an outlet.” 

Bret Shelley- “I love the way music makes me feel, I’ll listen to a song, and the way the chords are moving is enough to bring me to tears. I’ve had so many incredible moments in my life with music and I try to hunt that down to invoke that feeling in the music I create.”

Stay tuned for their next steps, and don’t miss their upcoming shows around Seattle. This is one band you’ll want to watch!

DJ Penny Lane - Meet the Band

https://www.instagram.com/huskyhippiehour/