#even when they said they were urgently hiring :)

[sunshinesalmon]

for the love of god somebody employ me

[lilacgaby]

title: saved.

pairing: childhoodfriend!katsuki x reader

when all hope failed you two, a twist of fate saved your futures.

alt. ending to this imagine | standalone(?)

note: my sincerest apologies to everyone <3 please accept my heartfelt apology (if i @/ed you it's especially dedicated to you)

katsuki held your hand taut in his, looking for a way, any way, to save you.

he couldn't find one, but he fought to. he was fighting the feeling of grotesque horror that came over him at the sight of your wound, your pain, the smell of your blood.

it was too much.

but he pushed through. he pushed through for you, he had to. he saw how your forced your eyes open, he felt the squeezing of your hand trying to keep yourself there with him.

upon inspection, the wound was piercing your lungs more towards the left-mid side of your body. his prayers now became answered, as a hero with a shattering quirk came running up to him.

they decided the best and quickest force of action would be to shatter the base of the beam, and fly you to urgent care where a team would be waiting.

he could do it, he had to. katsuki pondered, now moving over to address you, with slightly glazed over eyes. "babe, i- i have you. just hold on." you squeezed his hand in acknowledgment.

the plan was set into action, he tried to ignore the sounds of your guttural pain. the whimpers are sounds of choking are ones that'd haunt him for years, he was certain.

as he blasted over the city, little regard for his own injuries, he only had you on his mind.

he let out a sigh of relief as he saw the hospital come into view. the team waiting with a stretcher outside like he'd planned.

"we're here baby, you can rest now. i got you."

"you saved me." is all you said before finally letting your eyes shut. your body went limp with sleep and not death as he feared, the slightest rising of your chest comforting him as they got you on the table.

they immediately rushed you in and got to work, he wasn't able to see because a team was called out just for his wounds as well.

they treated him for a minor would on his arm, a pathetic excuse of an attack that only managed to land because you were on his mind. he laid in the bed, red eyes still alert and ready.

his exhaustion caught up to him, he fell asleep without knowing, only waking up to his mom shaking his shoulder. "hey kid, wife's asking for your dumbass. hurry it up." being the words that greeted him that day.

"whatever hag." he muttered under his breath as he jumped out of bed, directed to your room immediately.

you were still a bit out of it, drugged with pain relief medication. but still, with a dopey smile you greeted him. "kats' you're here."

he let out a smile for the first time in hours, he took your hand in his, his thumb over your heartbeat. "yeah, i am."

while your recovery wasn't fast, you were allowed home after three days. you'd likely never be the hero you once were, but the alternative was death so it's not what you were worried about.

the fight had left you with a hole in your body, your lungs now only at half capacity. katsuki was there every step of the way for you,

the entire ordeal even made him rise in the ranking, so his frequent absences were rewarding in multiple ways.

he'd take on most of the chores around your large home now, even hiring a maid for weekdays when he'd be gone. he was now clingier than ever, asking about you every hour, sending you texts and voicemails chatting about his day and asking of yours.

when you finally were well enough to make your redebut as a hero? he was ecstatic, though it was clear from the fact that he'd never let you patrol without him that he'd be stuck like glue to you for eternity.

he'd be proud of you for this, so eternally faithful to you that he asked to renew your vows for your anniversary this year, excited to gift you the new ring he had made for you.

everything you'd do in the day he'd find a way to be apart of. from laying his head in your lap as your watched shows, sitting by you as he paid for you nails, lugging behind you as you insisted on buying groceries even though the maids were on top of that, putting his arm around your neck whenever you stood by him.

but it's not like you minded,

after all, what's a princess without her knight in shining armor?

(tags: @that-one-fangirl69 @boyfie-hater @miliswrld @pretty-sparkle-bomb @prettyinpikk @rengokuswife2 @unk0wn-us3rr @keylozinzazane @kanvis @rhas-writes @h3ll0-kitti @yuckiman @kovu-bunnbunn @teacakes06 )

[ultrone]

⚒️🏚️🚧

#4.3k ⭑ #hcs&blurbs

꒰ ♡ ꒱ constructionworker!shauna who got a summer job because she needed money to get her car fixed. although she didn’t have any experience in construction, she was very strong from playing soccer and going to the gym occasionally. luckily, she got hired as an apprentice and received decent pay.

꒰ ♡ ꒱ even though she had always been athletic, this construction job was a whole new beast. she woke up every day at 5 a.m. and had to get to the job site by 6 a.m. then, she’d immediately start working, spending eight hours on the job. her body ached every day after work, and she was usually filthy.

꒰ ♡ ꒱ your mom needed a shed built in the backyard for storage. she chose a random building company, which happened to be shauna’s. since it wasn’t a complicated or urgent job, the company sent two of their senior workers and shauna to work on it for a few weeks. they were allowed to work at a decent pace because your mom said it was fine as long as they finished before summer ended.

꒰ ♡ ꒱ by the time you got back to your hometown for the summer, it had already been three days since shauna started the project in your backyard. since your mom was gone in the mornings for work, she just let you know that there were workers outside and asked you to watch out for them, letting them in if they needed to use the bathroom or get some water—nothing out of the ordinary.

⚒️🦺🧱

the first time you laid eyes on her was on your second day back home. you went down to the kitchen for a snack when suddenly, you heard a soft knock on the door leading to the backyard. you didn’t even pay attention to the person in front of the glass door until you opened it, and there she was, standing clearly in front of you.

she was wearing dirty work pants held up by a belt, paired with a tight sleeveless white shirt and a red, washed-out flannel tied around her waist. her dark brown hair was pulled back in a ponytail, with a few loose strands sticking to her sweaty forehead.

shauna stood awkwardly, smiling at you politely. her hands were covered in grime, and her face had black streaks of dirt. she seemed very embarrassed that she hadn’t had time to clean herself up before knocking on the door. her eyes widened slightly when she saw you, a hint of disbelief flashing across her face. she remembered your mother mentioning there was a daughter in the house, but wasn't expecting you to be around her age, or so... attractive.

her cheeks colored slightly as she remembered the state she was in. she cleared her throat, attempting to speak without stuttering.

"um, sorry to bother you," she began, her voice huskier than usual from the hot sun beating down on her all day. "i just wanted to ask if we could use your bathroom. we’ve been working for hours and could really use a break." she spoke softly, trying to ignore the way her heartbeat accelerated just from standing in front of you.

as you took in the sight of shauna standing at your door, covered in sweat and dirt, you couldn't help but feel a strange fluttering feeling in your chest. there was something appealing about her messy state, and the way she stood there awkwardly, her cheeks slightly flushed.

"yeah, sure," you replied sympathetically, stepping back and gesturing for her to come inside. "you can use the bathroom in the hallway. it's the first door on the right. make yourselves at home," you added with a warm smile.

you stepped aside, letting her pass through the door. she brushed past you, her body grazing yours for a brief second. you couldn’t help but notice how muscular her arms looked underneath her shirt, and how the sweat made her clothes cling to her body. however, when you noticed her staring right into your eyes, you quickly looked away, not wanting to seem like a pervert or anything.

shauna gave you a sheepish smile before heading straight for the bathroom. once inside, she looked at herself in the mirror and let out a frustrated sigh. she couldn't believe she had just encountered you in such a state. she would be so embarrassed if she weren't so exhausted.

as she splashed some water on her face and tried to tidy up a bit, she couldn't help but think about how beautiful you were. she wondered how old you were and if you were single. not that it mattered, she scolded herself; at the end of the day, you were just a client's daughter.

as you waited for shauna to finish in the bathroom, you tried to distract yourself by scrolling on your phone, but no matter how hard you tried, your thoughts kept going back to her.

when she emerged from the bathroom, looking slightly more presentable but still a mess, you gave her another warm smile. "feeling better?" you asked, attempting to hide your attraction to her.

shauna nodded shyly, running a hand through her damp hair. she chuckled weakly, shaking her head as she looked down at herself. "sorry, i must look like a disaster right now," she apologized, a hint of self-consciousness in her voice.

you smiled reassuringly, waving your hand. "don’t worry ‘bout it," you said, leaning against the wall. "you actually look kinda cute, in a rugged kind of way."

her cheeks flushed a darker shade at your comment, a mixture of embarrassment and pleasure evident on her face. "oh, thanks, i guess," she mumbled, looking up at you through her lashes.

there was a moment of awkward silence between you two, shauna looking like she wanted to say something but couldn’t find the words. just then, a deep voice cut through the air, interrupting the silence and making you both jump.

one of the older workers, a bulky man with a salt-and-pepper beard, walked over to you both, a smirk on his face. "hey, sunshine," he called out to shauna in a teasing tone. "your break time is up," he said gruffly.

shauna playfully rolled her eyes at him with a toothy smile. "yeah, yeah, i know," she retorted, crossing her arms over her chest.

the older worker chuckled, his eyes darting between you and shauna, a knowing glint in his eyes. "who's your friend here?" he asked, pointing a finger at you.

shauna's cheeks turned a bit pink, realizing she hadn't introduced you yet. "oh, right," she mumbled, looking at you apologetically. "this is..." she trailed off, realizing she didn’t know your name.

"y/n," you said, looking directly at shauna with a smile.

he nodded in acknowledgment, grinning widely. "well, well, looks like our girl’s made a new friend, eh?" he said, nudging shauna in the ribs.

shauna rolled her eyes again, her cheeks still slightly red. "shut up, greg," she muttered, elbowing him back.

greg chuckled, holding his hands up in surrender. "just messing with you, sunshine," he said, his eyes dancing with amusement. "anyway, i better get back to work. we've still got quite a bit to finish on the shed."

shauna nodded, glancing at her watch. "yeah, me too," she said, sighing heavily. she gave you another small, shy smile. "well, um, see you around?"

you smiled back at her, nodding briefly. "yeah, see you around," you replied, feeling a pang of disappointment as she was leaving.

as she followed greg back outside, you watched her go, unable to tear your eyes away from her muscular frame and determined stride.

꒰ ♡ ꒱ ever since that interaction, you started spending more time either in the kitchen or the living room. you pretended you were just hanging out, using your phone or eating, but in reality, you were constantly glancing through the glass doors to watch shauna, unable to take your eyes off her.

꒰ ♡ ꒱ there was something about her strong yet graceful movements, the way her muscles flexed as she worked, that you couldn't tear your eyes away from. you found yourself watching her more and more often, to the point where you were practically glued to the window.

꒰ ♡ ꒱ she didn't seem to notice your stares, too focused on her work to catch you looking at her. you felt a mixture of fascination and shame, knowing that you were acting like a stalker, yet unable to stop yourself from observing her every move.

꒰ ♡ ꒱ as the days went on, shauna began to notice that you were watching her. at first, she thought it was just a coincidence, but then she started to see the patterns in your behavior.

꒰ ♡ ꒱ whenever she bent over to pick something up, her shirt riding up just enough to reveal a strip of bare skin, she caught your eyes following the movement. whenever she lifted something heavy, flexing her biceps and showing off her strength, she saw your gaze linger on her muscular arms. she started to tease you, doing things on purpose just to see your reaction.

꒰ ♡ ꒱ she began working without her flannel tied around her waist, showcasing her toned stomach whenever she reached up to lift something. she made sure to stretch her arms up over her head every now and then, knowing that it would show off her muscular shoulders and back.

꒰ ♡ ꒱ whenever she took her breaks, she would sit out in the open, pretending to read a book but really watching for your reaction. she found it amusing how you tried to play it cool, pretending not to notice her subtle gestures. but she could see right through you, and she loved the power she had over you.

⚒️🦺🧱

today, the heat was almost unbearable. the sun was scorching, and even the breeze was hot. you were sitting in the kitchen, trying to cool down, when you heard the sound of footsteps approaching the house.

you turned your head to see shauna walking through the door, her clothes sticking to her sweaty skin. she looked hotter than ever, but there was something different about her. maybe it was the way she didn’t knock on the door this time, or the way she didn’t try to avoid your stare—she seemed more confident than the first time you met her in this same spot.

she brushed some loose strands of hair off her forehead, clearly frustrated by the oppressive heat. "hey," she greeted, her voice slightly hoarse. "mind if i have something to drink? it’s so damn hot outside, i feel like i’m sweating my skin off."

she leaned against the countertop, looking flushed and slightly irritated. the heat seemed to be getting to her, and her usual easy-going demeanor was replaced by a slightly grumpy attitude.

you chuckled softly at her grumbling, finding her slightly agitated state cute. "yeah, of course," you said, gesturing to the fridge. "help yourself. there's a pitcher of lemonade right in there."

you watched as she opened the refrigerator, grabbed the pitcher of lemonade, and poured herself a glass. as she took a long swig, her head tilting back slightly, a droplet of sweat slid down her forehead. you couldn't help but notice the way her throat bobbed with each swallow and how the skin on her neck glistened with sweat.

she set the glass down on the countertop, wiping her mouth with the back of her hand. "thanks," she muttered, her breath slightly labored. "i swear this heat is gonna be the death of me."

she leaned back against the counter again, wiping the sweat off her brow. her shirt, clinging to her skin from the perspiration, revealed a hint of the toned abdomen you had been admiring for days now.

"yeah, it's brutal out there," you replied, your eyes accidentally lingering on her stomach. you quickly looked away, hoping she didn't notice your gaze. "i don't know how you guys can work in this heat. i'd be dead after five minutes."

she snorted, a small puff of air escaping her lips. "yeah, tell me about it. you get used to it after a while, i guess," she replied, a slight note of pride in her voice. "besides, it's better than being stuck indoors all day."

she leaned her head back against the cupboard, letting out a small groan. "but god, i can't wait to get home and take a cold shower."

the casual way in which she mentioned showering sent a jolt of heat down your spine. you felt your cheeks turn slightly pink, and you had to look away again before she noticed your reaction.

"yeah, i bet," you mumbled, focusing your gaze on the table in front of you. "a cold shower sounds really nice right now."

as she finished her lemonade and set the empty glass down on the sink, she tugged a small towel out of the waistline of her jeans and wiped her face. the fabric was damp and slightly translucent, sticking to her skin as she patted herself dry.

she looked like a hot mess, but somehow, that made her even more attractive to you. you watched as she prepared to head back outside, feeling a pang of disappointment that your interaction was over so soon.

"anyway, thanks again for the drink," she said, giving you a grateful smile. "i gotta get back to work before greg yells at me again for slacking off."

as she walked out the door, she casually tossed the damp towel onto her shoulder, leaving it there as she pulled up her pants by hooking her fingers through the jean loops and heading back outside. you couldn't help but notice how the towel clung to her already sweat-soaked shirt, and it took all your strength not to watch her through the window as she walked away—she was a sight to behold.

you leaned back in the chair, your mind replaying the whole interaction on loop. the memory of her flushed face and damp hair, the sight of her toned muscles moving under her skin, the sound of her raspy voice... all of it was driving you crazy.

⚒️🦺🧱

you were pissed at yourself. how long has it been? five days since you first met her? and the damn pool casually sitting in your backyard never came to mind until today. you cursed yourself as the thought hit you.

and no, it wasn’t the fact that you were sweating your ass off on the living room couch while you could be swimming that bothered you. why didn't you think of this sooner? for five days, you've been wasting your time staring at shauna through the goddamn glass door when you could've been seeing her up close and personal from the comfort of your own pool. obviously, by disguising your stare with some sunglasses.

you took your sweet time selecting the perfect bikini, making sure it showed off all your curves just right. then, you grabbed a book, a towel, and a pair of sunglasses before making your way outside. sauntering over to the pool, you put extra effort into each step. with a confident smile, you entered the water and let out a content sigh as the cool liquid enveloped your hot skin. after a few minutes of swimming and cooling off, you relaxed.

meanwhile, shauna was busy working on the roof of the shed, up on the ladder with a tool belt strapped around her slim waist, her muscular arms and back straining as she hammered in nails and fixed roofing tiles. focused on her task, she didn't notice your presence at first. that is, until the sound of the water splashing caught her attention. pausing what she was doing, she looked in the direction of the pool, but all she saw was the surface of the water.

you swam back up in most alluring way possible, only to realize that shauna hadn't even noticed you. she was too fixated on her work, oblivious to your presence in the pool. with a disappointed huff, you swam to the edge and pulled yourself out, your dripping wet hair clinging to your face and your bikini sticking to your skin.

you made your way over to the lawn chair, adjusting yourself to find a comfortable position. closing your eyes, you let out a sigh as the warm sun beat down on your skin. the heat was bearable now that you'd cooled off in the pool.

just then, shauna glanced over at you, her eyes widening at the sight of you lying by the pool in your bikini. her gaze trailed over your body, taking in the curves and angles shown off by the scanty swimsuit. she was so distracted that she didn’t pay attention to her own footing, and her foot slipped off the edge of the ladder.

the loud thud jolted you out of your relaxation. startled, you snapped your eyes open, only to see shauna on the ground, surrounded by her concerned coworkers, asking if she was alright. her face was flushed red from both exertion and embarrassment as she sat there, nursing a bruised elbow. they hovered around her, fussing over her like concerned mother hens. she looked visibly frustrated, embarrassed that she had fallen in front of everyone because she had been ogling you.

by the time you walked over to where she was, she sat up, rubbing the back of her head with a scowl. when she saw you approaching, her expression instantly changed to annoyance.

"i'm fine," she huffed, waving off the other workers. "it's nothing, just a stupid fall." she looked annoyed with everyone for fussing over her, like a child who had scraped their knee and didn’t want to be babied.

you glanced at her injured elbow, noticing the scrapes along her skin. she tried to brush it off, but you weren’t having it.

“yeah, no,” you said firmly, grabbing her uninjured arm and gently pulling her towards the house. “come on, let me take a look at that.”

she protested a bit, but you ignored her grumbling and led her inside, leaving her coworkers to continue their work.

you ushered her into the guest bathroom and immediately began rummaging through the cabinets for the first aid kit. after a minute of searching and pulling out various items, you finally found it and set it down on the sink.

“come here, let me see your wound,” you said, gesturing for her to take a seat on the toilet.

shauna reluctantly complied, begrudgingly allowing you to take care of her scraped elbow. she looked like a petulant child, not wanting to admit that she needed help. you knelt in front of her, gently lifting her injured arm to examine the scrape. it wasn’t too bad, but it was oozing a little blood.

“this might sting a bit,” you warned, grabbing some rubbing alcohol and a cotton swab from the first aid kit. you dabbed the cotton swab in the rubbing alcohol and began cleaning the wound, trying to be as gentle as possible.

as you gently rubbed the alcohol-soaked cotton swab on her scraped elbow, she jerked slightly from the pain. instead of pulling away, she suddenly grabbed her abdomen with her other hand, wincing and doubling over slightly.

you paused, looking at her in concern. noticing the pained expression on her face and the way she was holding her abdomen, you asked, “hey, are you okay?” setting the cotton swab aside, you placed a hand on her shoulder. “what’s wrong with your stomach?”

you gently lifted her shirt. she tried to stop you, but you persisted, wanting to get a better look at her abdomen. that's when you saw the angry red mark on her skin, a souvenir from the fall. it was a large scratch, likely caused by the sharp edge of a plank at the top of the shed.

“jesus, that looks painful,” you murmured, your fingers lightly tracing the edges of the scratch without touching it directly.

shauna let out a small hiss at your touch, flinching slightly as your fingers grazed the sensitive skin. “yeah, it hurts like a bitch,” she muttered, wincing again as she shifted slightly in her seat.

she suddenly became aware of just how close you were to her. your fingers gently ran over her skin, tracing the length of the scratch with a soft touch. your furrowed eyebrows showed your concern for her injury. she felt a shiver run down her spine as your gaze scanned her abdomen, carefully examining the damage. she couldn't help but feel a bit nervous under your touch and attention.

she tried to distract herself from the closeness of your bodies by looking anywhere but at you. her hands fidgeted in her lap, and she felt her heart rate quicken. she wasn't accustomed to being so close to someone or having anyone focus on her so intently.

meanwhile, you were too preoccupied with examining the scratch to notice her nervous behavior. you carefully checked the injury, ensuring there were no splinters or dirt particles lodged in the wound.

"this looks a bit deep," you murmured, your eyes still fixed on the scratch. “i'm gonna need to clean it properly to avoid infection.”

she swallowed hard as you spoke, your face just inches from hers, eyes focused on her abdomen.

"alright," she whispered, her hands clenching the fabric of her jeans. "just be gentle, it hurts."

you gave her a reassuring smile, hoping to ease her nerves. "don't worry, i'll be careful," you said gently.

reaching into the first aid kit, you pulled out some sterile gauze and antiseptic liquid. after dipping the gauze in the liquid, you squeezed out the excess.

"this might sting a bit," you warned, bringing the gauze closer to her abdomen. "try to stay still, alright?"

"okay," she mumbled, closing her eyes and biting her lip, feeling her muscles tense up in anticipation.

you gently pressed the gauze onto the scratch, the antiseptic liquid making contact with her injured skin. she flinched and inhaled sharply, her eyes squeezing shut.

“just a little longer,” you whispered gently, continuing to dab at the wound. you could feel her body tense beneath your touch, and though you knew it must be painful, you also knew it was necessary.

after a few moments, you carefully removed the used gauze and set it aside. the cleaned scratch looked slightly better, though redness and swelling still lingered.

you carefully placed a new sterile gauze over the scratch and secured it with medical tape. now that the wound was dressed, your hands hovered over her abdomen. your fingers lingered on the edges of the gauze, gently caressing the exposed skin above it.

you looked up, locking eyes with her, and suddenly realized what you were doing. you quickly attempted to pull your hand away, a flush of embarrassment spreading across your cheeks at the unexpected intimacy.

just as you were about to retreat, she reached out and gently grasped your hand, preventing you from moving further. she brought your hand back to her abdomen, her warm fingers wrapped around yours, holding you in place.

she looked into your eyes, her expression one of embarrassment and gratitude. “thank you,” she whispered, her voice barely louder than a breath.

your heart pounded wildly as she held your hand against her abdomen. the heat of her skin against your palm sent a jolt of something unfamiliar through you. you opened your mouth to speak, but no words came out. you simply nodded, your eyes locked on hers, your hand still resting on her belly.

a charged silence hung between you, pressing upon you both like a heavy weight. instinctively, you licked your lips, a nervous habit you weren't even aware of. the action was reflexive, a response to the intense atmosphere.

as your tongue darted across your lips, her gaze flickered from your eyes to your mouth. a brief moment of vulnerability crossed her face. before you could react, she leaned forward and pressed her lips against yours.

the moment was passionate and slow, your heart racing with each passing second. your hands slid to her waist, moving upward to rest on her shoulders as the kiss deepened. you gently teased her lower lip with your tongue, and her mouth opened slightly, inviting your exploration. her hands found the back of your neck, pulling you closer.

after breaking the kiss, you both gasped for air, chests heaving with desire. her eyes locked onto yours, glowing with lust and curiosity.

just as the tension was reaching its peak, the sound of footsteps outside jolted you both back to reality. reluctantly, you broke apart, disentangling your limbs and returning to your personal spaces. she shuffled, clearing her throat and adjusting her shirt, while you tried to steady your racing heartbeat.

"thanks again," she muttered, avoiding eye contact. "i better get back to work."

"yeah," you managed to reply, your voice slightly hoarse. "see you around?" you asked, still a bit flustered and disoriented. she quickly stood up from the toilet, smoothing out her clothes and avoiding your gaze. the heat of the earlier moment still lingered in the air.

she gave a quick nod, a hint of a smirk playing at the corners of her lips. it was clear she was trying to play it cool, but her cheeks were still flushed pink.

"yeah, sure thing," she said, shoving her hands in her pockets. "see you later."

with that, she quickly walked out of the bathroom, leaving you standing there, alone with your thoughts.

[itslixtoyou]

Revenge

Miguel O’Hara x fem reader

Fic type - NSFW/smut (Minors dni)❗️

Warnings - Miguel is possessive, oral sex, semi-public sex because there’s someone in the next room, Miguel is a little forceful, p in v sex, lmk if I missed any.

Summary - You tell Miguel about the guy who’s been flirting with you at work, so he invites him over to clarify how he feels of this man’s pathetic behavior; but not with his words. ;p

Word count - 1,800 words

Note - This is kind of short and sweet, I wrote it while I was in a mood lol.

“Yeah, that’s fine.” Miguel’s voice sounded tired as he walked inside, one hand holding his phone up to his ear while the other closed the front door; locking it as well.

You glanced up to look at him from where you were sitting on the couch. He gave you a small grin while he made his way through the house, continuing his conversation as he set his stuff down on the floor next to you.

“Alright, thank you sir.” He spoke, placing his hand behind his neck. “Okay, I’ll let you know in the morning.” He glanced at you with his eyes strained, silently complaining about how he wished the call would end already.

Fortunately for him, his pleas were answered.

“Okay, I’ll see you tomorrow. Goodbye.” He ended the call, sighing heavily afterward.

“Sorry, Cariño.” He smiled as he walked toward you, planting a kiss to the top of your head and taking a seat next to you on the sofa. “How did your meeting go?”

“It was good,” You motioned for him to lay his head on your lap; which he happily complied with. “It wasn’t as long this time so I got to leave early.” You started explaining, feeling him rest against your thighs.

“That’s good.” He slowly began circling your leg with his thumb, nuzzling his face against your soft skin.

“So, when I got there...” As you continued with your full report of the meeting, Miguel quickly began to tune you out. He didn’t mean to ignore you of course, but the minute you placed your fingers in his hair and began gently scratching at his scalp, he knew he couldn’t resist falling into his trance.

He closed his eyes to listen, not necessarily to the words you were blurting out, but to the sound of your voice.

What were you saying? Something about a co-worker? He didn’t care that much, all he was concerned with now was that soothing tone of yours and how it seemed to calm him, relaxing him after the stressful day he’s had.

“Mhmm,” he faked a response, reveling in your touch as you eagerly ranted on.

Coming home was always his favorite part of the day and the reason for that was right here, letting him rest on her lap. It was occasions like this that he enjoyed the most, fragments of time where he didn’t have to worry about a single thing. Though he had no clue as to the words you were speaking, his heart grew warm nonetheless.

That is, he wasn't listening, until something you said suddenly grabbed his attention.

“Wait what?” He quickly got up from your lap. “Say that again?”

“He asked me to have dinner with him.” You repeated your last sentence.

“Who did?!” He asked urgently.

“That new guy I was telling you about the other day. Apparently he didn’t know I was married.” You giggled at the miscommunication, however, your husband didn’t share in your giddiness.

Miguel was furious. He knew who this guy was. He’d been flirting with you from the day he got hired, but now he’d clearly decided to take it up a knotch.

How the hell could he not know you're married?! Did he not see the ring on your finger?

That’s when Miguel paused, remembering you hadn’t been wearing your wedding ring the past few days because you had to get it re-sized.

That must’ve been it! That must be the reason that little weasel thought he had a chance.

Since you were too preoccupied with your job, you didn’t talk much about your husband while at work anyways. If you did, it would’ve been with the employees you were close with, not someone you just met like this annoying new guy.

You probably hadn’t even talked about Miguel yet around him, and that’s why he thought he could creep his way into this marriage.

“What’d you tell him?”

You chuckled at his question; assuming you’d ever say anything besides “no.”

“I told him I have a husband obviously.”

Your hand swatted his shoulder lightly, telling him to knock it off with the newfound jealousy he was clearly feeling.

Except it wasn’t jealously he was experiencing, it was possession.

How dare this man pretend he even had the smallest chance with a woman like you, or that he could so easily replace the man you called your husband.

He shouldn’t even have the privilege to look your way, much less have the audacity to think you’d be interested in a bum like him.

This man was already an annoynace in your husband’s eyes, but now he crossed the line. And now he’d pay for it.

“Why don’t you invite him over for dinner?”

Your nose scrunched at his suggestion. “What?! Why?”

Miguel quickly leaned in to place a tender kiss to your cheek, pretending to have changed his attitude. “Just so he knows for sure that you’re married. Plus, we can set him up with one of the more desperate ladies in the office.”

You were confused at first. Why would Miguel want to have him over for dinner, he clearly despised the man? But while your husband placed a second kiss to your cheek, whispering about how “he’s got this” and “it’ll be fine,” you figured there was nothing to worry about.

After all, it’s just a dinner, nothing too terrible should come from it, right?

WRONG.

When your husband first asked you to leave the dinner table and follow him to the bedroom because he “needed help with something,” it’s safe to say you didn’t expect him to start making advances on you.

“Miggy!” You squealed as he pushed you down onto the mattress, assuming his position on top and trapping you beneath him. “What are you doing? We can’t do this now!”

“We’re doing it.” He answered with a stern tone, wasting no time in stripping you of the clothes that covered you.

He took a second to pause afterward, admiring your glorious body beneath him. He smirked gently at the sight, knowing this was a view only he had the privilege of seeing.

That little pervert still sitting at the kitchen table could never dream of observing something like this. Your figure was a work of art to put it lightly, every heavenly curve of your outline was nothing short of breathtaking.

And it was all Miguel’s.

He quickly adjusted his stance, spreading your legs widely and lowering his mouth to your cunt.

“Wait Miguel-”

“Hush querido,” he shushed you, leaning forward to spread you open and begin his revenge.

You tired to protest. It was beyond unsuitable to be doing this when your co-worker was unknowingly sitting in the room right next to you both. What if he heard?!

But you see, that’s exactly why your husband was doing this; He wanted him to hear. He wanted to prove to that filthy little urchin that he never had a chance with someone as astonishing as you.

That imbecile could never treasure you the way Miguel did, he’d never know how to make your back arch and your fingers tighten around the sheets the way Miguel does.

He’d barely even started, but just his tongue was enough to have your eyes rolling back and your lips spreading to moan his name. So much for trying to stop him.

You did try at least, but once he started lapping at you just the way he knew you liked it, your self control was all but gone.

Miguel knew every movement that made you shudder, every flick of his tongue that made your thighs squeeze against his head. He especially knew how much your pussy loved the feel of his cock plunged inisde you, how your eyes would well up with tears when he hit that sweet spot just right.

Miguel knew all these things that no one else did, especially not the man who was eating at his dinning table. The one who stupidly thought he could even come close to measuring up to your husband.

“Miguel! Nghh!” You moaned, trying to catch your breath as your husband reletnelesly paced inside you.

“Louder!” He demanded, making his thrusts deeper so you’d obey. “Louder hermosa, I want him to hear your voice.”

He gritted his teeth, grasping your thighs so he could nuzzle himself deeper inside you. Which quickly sent you over the edge.

“Ugh! Fuck!” Your legs trembled at his touch, feeling the way he was drinking you in; completing you.

“That feel good?” He cooed, placing a kiss to your sweaty forehead. “Who makes you feel this good, huh? Anyone else?”

You shook your head as a reply, but he didn’t like that answer.

“Say it! Who makes you feel this good? Anyone else?”

He repositioned himself, leaning backwards for a little head start before he slammed back inside you.

“Agh!” Your walls quickly clamped down on him, a blissful sensation washing over you in the process. “No- ugh!.. No one else Miguel- ahh.. only- o-only you!”

Your sentences were slurred and your breathing staggered. You were struggling to speak the words he commanded, but you got there eventually.

“That’s right. No one but me!” He boasted loudly, thrusting for the last time before he decided enough was enough and laid against your bare chest.

With how loud those sweet moans of yours were, there was no doubt that pathetic excuse of a man in the other room heard it. Miguel had made his point. He’d shown what a real man is capable of when it comes to pleasuring a woman the right way. He proved just how insignificant that little moron was. Also how idiotic he was for ever thinking he could even breathe your direction without compensation for it.

Looks like your new co-worker will be finding a job elsewhere, especially after the way he scurried out the front door once the two of you finally came back to that forgotten dinning table.

“No its fine, I just forgot I had plans! I should be going now!” The cretin was stuttering out excuses like there was no tomorrow. Going on about how he had a “family emergency” he had to get to immediately.

And Miguel had the greatest pleasure of hearing from you about how your little friend had decided to quit his new job unexpectedly the next day.

How odd. I wonder what made him decide something so suddenly?

Oh well, what a shame.

[deliciousangelfestival]

Underworld Insomnia | 4 - B.Barnes

Character : Bucky × Psychiatrist Female!Reader

Summary: As a ruthless contract killer, Bucky is feared in the underworld of criminals. His opponents freeze when they see him, as he is feared among them. However, they don't know that he could be warm to only one person: his psychiatrist. The only person who could make him fall asleep.

Chapter 1, Chapter 2 , Chapter 3 , Chapter 4 , Chapter 5 ,-

Main Masterlist || support: Ko-fi

Thank you to everyone who has read this chapter. Please let me know what your thoughts are. I'd love to hear your feedback. Thank you once again.

"Frosty longed for companionship, but no matter where he drifted, he found himself alone in the icy wilderness," the soothing voice of the story lulled Bucky into drowsiness. Just as he began to succumb to sleep, he heard your urgent cry, "Bucky!"

His body relaxed upon hearing your voice, but his eyelids felt heavy, weighed down by exhaustion. As he fought to keep them open, he sensed a peculiar sensation—something cool and tingling on his face. With a struggle, he managed to crack his eyes open, greeted by the sight of a small figure with oversized glasses hovering over him.

Bucky rubbed his eyes in confusion. "You... Ahh!!! What is this?" he exclaimed, noticing Conroy holding a tube of toothpaste.

Conroy, ever matter-of-fact, explained, "Because you're not awake. Seems like your body lack of iron."

Bucky narrowed his eyes at Conroy, feeling a mix of amusement and irritation at the kid's audacity. "Bah! I'm still in my prime," he retorted, trying to maintain his tough demeanor despite the situation's absurdity.

You were in another room when you heard an adult male voice, and you approached them, relieved to find that Bucky was no longer asleep. "You're awake," you remarked, noticing the toothpaste under Bucky's eyes. You knew it must be Conroy's doing.

Moving closer to Bucky, you reached for a cloth to wipe away Conroy's prank. "Conroy, you have to apologize to Bucky," you insisted firmly.

Bucky was taken aback by your actions. First, as the best contract killer in the industry, he could evade guns, knives, poisons, and other threats, but he never expected your voice to act as a lethal weapon. Second, he was surprised by the sudden tenderness in your gesture. He had never experienced such care before.

Conroy put his hands on his hips defiantly. "Why? If it's not because of me, he would still be asleep," he argued.

You clicked your tongue, feeling the need to maintain respect for the homeowner who could also protect you both from the group.

Bucky waved his hand dismissively. "It's fine," he assured, standing up to put some distance between himself and you. Perhaps it was your perfume that made his heart race. Clearing his throat, he asked, "How long was I asleep?"

You replied, "12 hours."

Bucky closed his mouth in disbelief. Twelve hours? That was a new record.

Concerned for his health, you suggested, "Bucky, do you need to go to the hospital? Perhaps something is wrong with your health?"

Bucky crossed his arms, feeling a bit irritated that both you and Conroy seemed to underestimate his health. He shook his head. "No. I've been there multiple times, and they found nothing wrong with me. Besides..." His conversation was cut short as he received a call.

"Hello?" he answered.

"Where the heck have you been?" the voice on the other end demanded.

"Sleeping," Bucky replied simply.

"What?! I don't even want to know. Just get your ass over here. Our situation is not good in the Caribbean Sea. Pirates tried to steal our client's ship."

Bucky's response was nonchalant, "Sure. Prepare the plane for me."

"But there's nowhere to land," came the urgent reply.

Bucky smirked, unfazed, "Who said the plane has to land?"

***********

At an altitude of 40,000 feet inside the cargo plane, Bucky surveyed the situation below. Miguel, one of his colleagues, filled him in on the mission details, "Our client hired us to rescue his son. Pirates are attempting to capture the vessel because they know our client is wealthy."

As Bucky prepared his parachute bag and checked his guns, Miguel asked him, "Are you sure you want to go alone?"

Bucky nodded confidently. "Yup. It'll be quick. See you later." With a salute, he jumped from the plane, disappearing into the night sky. Watching his fearless departure, Miguel chuckled and shook his head. "Crazy dude," he muttered to himself.

Once airborne, Bucky opened his parachute and descended gracefully toward the pirate-infested ship below. As he landed on the deck, he swiftly drew his weapons and sprang into action. With precise aim and lightning-fast reflexes, he took down each pirate one by one, dodging their gunfire with ease.

In a matter of seconds, the deck was cleared, and Bucky secured the area before moving to rescue the client's son. Amidst the chaos, he located the young man and ensured his safety, escorting him to a secure location on the ship.

The client's son, shaken but unharmed, looked up at Bucky with gratitude in his eyes. "Thank you," he said, his voice trembling with relief.

Bucky's work was clean and efficient, a testament to the positive effects of his recent restful sleep. He nodded in acknowledgment as he received praise from his agency's boss. "Great job."

However, when the boss mentioned wanting to introduce him to someone, Bucky politely declined. "No, I need to head back," he explained. He remembered that you and Conroy were relying on emergency food supplies back at the safe house. While Conroy might have a sharp tongue, Bucky couldn't forget that he was still just a 4-year-old kid.

With a sense of responsibility, Bucky prioritized your well-being and Conroy's comfort over any additional meetings or introductions. He needed to ensure that you both had enough to eat and were safe while he was away.

Bucky returned to the safe house to find you and Conroy engaged in making origami, a sight that amused him. It seemed that neither of you found entertainment in TV or movies.

Upon hearing the door open, you looked up and greeted him, "Welcome back."

"Hm," Bucky acknowledged, feeling a warm sensation at being welcomed home for the first time.

Conroy abandoned his Godzilla origami and rushed over to Bucky. "Is that the same chicken I had?" His hand reached out eagerly for the plastic bag, but Bucky raised it just out of reach, prompting Conroy to pause. "Hey."

Bucky raised an eyebrow playfully. "Don't 'hey' me. Ask me nicely."

Conroy's cheeks puffed up with a pout. "Can I have some of the food, please?"

Bucky chuckled, lowering the bag. "It's all yours."

Conroy dashed to the table, exclaiming, "Yes!"

Left alone with you, Bucky expressed his gratitude. "With 12 hours of sleep, I was able to finish my work quickly. Thanks."

You smiled warmly. "I'm glad I could help."

Bucky glanced around the safe house, noticing the origami creations scattered around. "What are you two making?"

You chuckled softly. "Conroy wanted to learn origami, so we've been practicing."

Bucky observed the colorful paper creations with a hint of admiration. "Looks like he's getting pretty good at it."

You nodded proudly. "He's a quick learner."

Just then, Conroy returned to the table, devouring his fried chicken with gusto. Between bites, he grinned at Bucky. "Thank you for the food!"

Bucky ruffled Conroy's hair affectionately. "You're welcome, kiddo."

As the three of you sat together, enjoying the simple pleasure of a shared meal, Bucky couldn't help but feel a sense of belonging he hadn't experienced in a long time. Despite the dangers lurking in the shadows, there was a sense of peace and camaraderie within the walls of the safe house.

Bucky leaned forward, his eyes focused on you with a seriousness that caught your attention. "Do you have a plan to put Conroy into kindergarten?"

You paused, a thoughtful expression crossing your face. "At the moment, no. With everything that's been happening, it hasn't really crossed my mind."

Bucky nodded, considering your words carefully. "If you want, I know of a safe kindergarten that's highly secretive. It's attended by children of parents in similar lines of work, like myself. To ensure Conroy's safety, we could even consider changing his name."

As you listened to Bucky's suggestion, you couldn't help but feel a sense of gratitude for his concern. Despite his tough exterior, he genuinely cared about your well-being and Conroy's.

After you answered, Conroy interjected excitedly, "I want to go!!!" He hopped down from his chair and dashed over to Bucky, his eyes wide with enthusiasm. "I want to join the kindergarten. Please,~"

Bucky chuckled at Conroy's sudden burst of energy, finding his eagerness endearing. "You can, if you behave," he replied with a playful grin.

Conroy puffed out his chest proudly. "I am a good kid," he declared, his determination evident in his stance.

You couldn't help but smile at Conroy's excitement, feeling hopeful for his future despite the challenges you faced. With Bucky's support and the promise of a safe place for Conroy to learn and grow, you felt a sense of relief wash over you.

***********

The next day, Bucky continued his day with a brand new energy, grateful for the restful sleep he had gotten. This newfound routine eased his anxiety, allowing him to approach the day with a clearer mind.

He decided to visit the bar, a usual haunt where killers often gathered. As he entered, the dimly lit ambiance greeted him, familiar and somewhat comforting.

To his surprise, his boss approached him, accompanied by a figure clad in a custom suit that exuded an air of mystery and intelligence. The man's demeanor suggested he was no ordinary individual; perhaps a member of the CIA or a special undercover agent. His sharp gaze bore into Bucky, assessing him with keen interest as if dissecting his every move and thought.

The person introduced himself to Bucky with a firm handshake and a confident demeanor. "It's an honor to meet you, Barnes," he began in a voice with authority and a hint of intrigue. "I'm August Walker, and you have something that I want."

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[specterllaw]

Mommy or Ma'am? - Mike Ross x Reader / Older Brother Harvey

Summary: After a hospital scare, Mike is put on babysitting duty, which quickly turns into a fun morning for you both

Warnings: SMUT, Switch! reader Switch! Mike

Harvey knew getting Jessica to hire you was a bad idea, he thought he could fully trust you though. You were twenty two it was your first real job, even it was just making copies for everybody in the office when needed.

I was going smoothly for awhile until Monday Morning rolled around, Y/n was on edge because not only did she have tests coming up but she also had sports, work, and helping her older brother Harvey keep his penthouse and office clean and neat. She felt like she was losing it, so whenever she was woken up at 6AM to go to the office she wanted to start crying, she hadn't even been to bed really, only falling asleep twenty minutes before Harvey even woke her up.

You were stuck in the copier room, taking stacks of papers from different associates, and partners and just coping them over and over again. It was working smoothly until you dozed off coping papers and mixed up the order of them, now realizing you messed up very important documents your breathing started to shallow. You heart rate was speeding up and you started to feel dizzy and hot, holding onto the table next to the copier tightly you heard somebody's rushed footsteps approach you all before your eye sight went black. "Woah woah woah" Mike said taking in your unusual state holding you up quickly as your body went limp "Louis! Rachel!" He yelled trying to shake you lightly "C'mon Y/n, wake up" He whispered nervously, not knowing what was going on with you, as he saw Louis walking up to the door he took a breath of relief "Stay here with her, I'm gonna call an ambulance and go get Harvey" Mike said urgently, gently laying you on the ground, using his suit jacket as a cushion under your head, waiting until Louis knelt next to you to try and wake you before rushing through the firm "Donna! call 911! now" He said checking Harvey's office only to see it empty "Mike! Calm down what's going on?" Donna asked worried standing up and resting a hand on his chest "I walked in to get copies from y/n and as soon as I walked in, she fell to the ground- where's Harvey?" He asked quickly before rushing to Jessica's office seeing Harvey sitting in front of her desk. "What do you need, Ross? We're having a very important-" Mike cut Jessica off quickly, and rudely. "Y/n passed out, I don't what happened" He whispered, Harvey looked at Jessica and then Mike "Damnit" he huffed standing up quickly rushing to the copier room right as paramedics were coming up from the elevator and rushing to the same room as him.

Whenever you woke up seeing your room empty made your heart hurt, not even Mike showed up to check on you? What even happened? Right before you could decide on what happened you hear the door latch and in rushes Mike and Harvey fighting on who gets in the room first. "Y/n" Harvey sighed sitting on the side on your bed "Don't ever do whatever you did again" He demanded, thinking he was talking about you messing up the copies and files you started to tear up "I-I'm sorry" You whimpered, terrified you might get fired for all of this "For what? I mean..Whenever you feel worked up..come find me..I understand more than you know, y/n/n" he whispered running a hand over your hair to smooth it out "I get panic attacks too...instead of...blacking out..I puke"He whispered, you studied his face, that explained all the mornings before his trials he'd get sick. "Same goes for you then..come find me" You whispered to him grabbing his hand squeezing it "So what happened?" You added on tilting your head "Exhaustion, y/n" Harvey said sternly "Which means, you're taking the next two days off, to rest, recharge" He said turning his head as Mike coughed awkwardly. "Okay kid, I'll let you speak, but I swear if you try anything with my sister I will kill you" Harvey stated seriously and confidently "Okay okay" Mike grumbled raising his hands up in the air before taking Harvey's seat, Harvey taking a step out into the hallway to call Jessica.

"Mr. Ross" You mumbled, you still felt a little sleepy from whatever they gave you but you were desperate to wake up "Ms. Specter" He quipped back running his hands down his pants legs. "You okay, Mike?" You asked softly sitting up to rest a hand on his shoulder "Y/n..I like you" He whispered "More than a friend, more than a co-worker, and I wanna like you as my girlfriend..but I don't want your brother to kill you" Mike added on resting a hand on yours "How long have you felt like this Mike?" You whispered using your other hand to cup his cheek "Weeks.....You're just..so kind and sassy, and the way you give Harvey shit is just...the proud look you have on your face after you make him speechless is adorable" He rambled "I would have you make copies of random words I had typed up just to see you..that's what I was on my way to do whenever I came into the copier room and found you leaning on the table about to fall.." Mike rambled even farther before you giggled and kissed him deeply

"Can you not shut the hell up Mike?" You mumbled against his lips as he resting a hand on yours, jumping away whenever he heard the door open "Excuse me!" Harvey yelled looking at you both "Care to explain yourselves, children?" He asked crossing his arms like a mother.

You were surprised to see Harvey agree to let Mike stay over, he claimed it was just to 'help you sleep, like you claimed' but you felt like he preferred you not to be home. As you walked into your room you smiled as Mike who was already ready for bed, striped to nothing but his boxers, truth was you and Mike had slept together, a couple of times, you both had agreed it was strictly friends with benefits until just yesterday at the hospital. "Ready for me to help you sleep?" Mike quoted playfully "Yes sir" You giggled climbing onto the bed, straddling Mike's lap as you looked down at him "Ah ah, Princess needs to rest, let me do all the work, baby" he whispered before using his hips and body force to flip you two over to where he was hovering over you.

"Look. At. Me" Mike demanded, you were on your third orgasm now, Harvey was long gone at work now and Mike was spending the day inside of with you, specifically taking turns making each other cum, but now Mike had taken it into his own hands to make you forget your own name, and you were 10000% okay with that. You felt Mike's hand grab your chin forcefully having you look up "I said look at me." He growled as he kept grinding his hips, his dick still buried six and a half inches deep inside of you, you moaned loudly leaning your head further back into the pillows, biting your lip as you made eye contact with Mike, whining and moaning loudly again. You couldn't help it, between his shiny lips from going down on you, to the messy ass hair from you pulling on it, or making the sex drunk look with the lazy smirk as his face as he fucked you into oblivion. "F-Fuck Mike!" You whimpered as he spit forcefully down where his cock entered inside of you before rubbing your clit with two fingers. You couldn't take it, you wanted to scream but you knew your brother would get a noise complaint and he'd know what you two were doing, home alone.

"My slut can take it" Mike whispered in your ear as he wrapped a hand around your throat, squeezing tightly as he started to thrust his hips alot faster than he previously was "Fuck fuck fuck Mike!" You screamed trying to close your legs but Mike just held them back open, continuing the sweet abuse on your clit, you could feel yourself getting close to the breaking point of cumming again and you knew Mike didn't care. You gasped loudly arching your back as he started fucking you alot faster, the hand around your throat tightening and it just added to your pleasure. "Cum, slut" Mike growled, not letting his hips falter its pace as he watched you cum, the way your face scrunched up, or the way your pussy squeezed around his cock as tight as possible, or maybe it was the fact you were screaming his name while leaving scratch marks all down his back but whatever it was, he wanted to remember it forever. You started to whimper, his cock moving inside of you beginning to become way too much for you to handle "Hold on baby..Use your words, you know what to say to stop, Daddy's so close though" Mike panted as he kept fucking you, his little whimpers were enough to get you wet yet again, but this time it sparked an idea. Once Mike started to pull out you glared at him, giving him a look that says 'you'll regret that' "Keep fucking me, baby" You whispered grabbing his boxer waist band that was tugged down below his cock, using it to pull him back closer, and his cock back deeper inside of you "Keep fucking mommy" You moaned arching your back, Mike whined before rolling onto his back pulling you ontop of him "Fuck keep talking please, you're so fucking hot" He moaned grinding his hips up "So Mike Ross is also a bottom?" You gasped playfully before holding his hips down "In that case, hips down, slut" You demanded before starting to grind and bounce your hips slowly on his lap, moving his cock in and out of you at a slow pace, making Mike try and sit up quickly, once he realized that wasn't happening he attempted to try and speed up your pace by thrusting his hips up but you just grabbed his hair and tugged it back, using the opportunity to leave hickeys down his neck. "F-Fuck Ma'am" Mike whined sitting up holding you close to him before taking one of your nipples in his mouth, swiping his tongue over it along with gently nipping at it, all making you increase the speed you were going. Mike was a whining wiggling mess, desperate to fuck you again and get his pleasure, he hadn't been a bottom since high school when he fucked the popular girl so this was extremely extremely hot for him.

"You wanna fuck me, baby?" You whispered in his ear dragging your nails down his back "Yes. yes yes yes Mommy, ma'am, yes, whatever you want me to call you just please let me fuck you, I wanna make you cum again" He whined trying to move his hips up against you as you lifted your hips up so it was just the tip inside of you. "Then take whats yours, Mike.." You whispered before kissing him deeply, he flipped you again, fucking you alot more erratic and harder, slamming into your pussy like it was the last time he'd ever fuck anybody. "Fuck!" You both shouted, yours more of a moan while Mike's was a full whine. You gasped feeling him cum inside of you, something you weren't expecting considering he had a condom, you couldn't think too much about it as you felt that familiar knot in your stomach snap as you came for the fifth or sixth time that morning.

As Mike pulled out you watched him stare down in horror and shock "Y/n..The condom broke.." He mumbled looking towards you as you were laying down trying to catch your breath.

[marsplastic13]

'Complicated' (part 20) - Kaz Brekker x reader

Idea - Kaz Brekker hires a prostitute to overcome his touch aversion, and be a better man for Inej, but things take an unxepected turn. Pairing: Kaz Brekker x Prostitute!Reader, (had to use y/n because I'm bad at names) Genre: modern AU, slow burn word count: 5.8k notes: HI EVERYONE! I know I got a bit lost with this story but at some point I felt that we all forgot about it, but some people asked me to continue and I found the time to finish it!! Thank you so much for every interaction in the past months <3

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“Do we really have to do this?” Kaz murmured, still with his eyes closed. His face was buried in her cleavage, where he had slept for the previous hours, inhaling the scent of her cherry-scented body oil.

“Yes,” Y/N laughed at his sleepy voice. “We invited everybody; they will be here in a few hours.”

“Then I can sleep some more.”

The past night, Kaz had been called for an urgent job that went on from 1 am for approximately twelve hours. When he finally got home, he just collapsed in Y/N's arms and was still there, not even changing out of his clothes.

“We have to get things ready,” reminded Y/N, who was starting to get annoyed at being used as a pillow.

“We are the ones that got engaged; they should throw the party for us,” he protested weakly. They invited both of their friend groups over after months of keeping them accurately separated. Kaz felt that disaster was around the corner.

“Sure, baby. But since it's not like that, we have to get up.”

“Nina asked me if she needs to bring something,” he remembered, refusing to move while Y/N tried to shove him away.

“A new liver,” she replied confidently. “Come on, let me get up. I can't feel my arms anymore.”

“How long did I sleep?” he asked, finally moving away.

“Almost four hours,” Y/N stretched her arms, getting up.

“Not enough. You can set up everything alone, right? You're such a strong, independent woman; you don't need me.” Kaz smirked into the pillow, trying to get to sleep again.

He heard Y/N sighing annoyed, “If you're not up in five minutes, I'll test if your PS5 is waterproof.”

“You wouldn't,” he replied with a hint of concern.

“Who knows?” she teased, her voice carrying a mix of amusement and threat.

Kaz groaned, rolling onto his back. “Fine, fine. I’m up.”

Y/N smiled victoriously, leaning down to kiss his forehead. “Thank you, love. Now, let’s get this party ready.” 

Kaz dramatically got up, dragging his feet and leaning on the kitchen door. He watched Y/N as she bustled around, setting things up. She was already in full party-prep mode, her movements efficient and determined.

“So, is Inej coming?” she asked without looking at him, her voice casual but carrying an undertone of curiosity.

Kaz sighed, replaying his last conversation with Inej. The memory was a fresh wound, his words echoing in his mind. He cursed himself once more for the terrible choice of words he had used to break the news to her. His words always seemed to fail him in front of her.

The memory of her eyes lighting up when he told her that Y/N wasn’t his girlfriend anymore still haunted him. He had realized immediately the poor choice of phrasing and corrected himself, saying they were engaged. But the damage was done. A veil of hurt had passed over her eyes, even though she had quickly masked it with a small smile and said she was happy for them. 

“She stayed vague, but I don't think she's coming,” Kaz replied, trying to keep his voice even, though the regret lingered in his tone.

Y/N hummed in acknowledgment, not letting any real reaction transpire. She continued setting up, but Kaz could tell she was processing his words

“My friends are coming over like 30 minutes before yours,” Y/N said, handing Kaz bottle after bottle to set on the table.

“Why?” he asked, puzzled as he arranged the drinks.

“To be already tipsy when your friends arrive and because we haven't seen each other in ages,” she replied with a casual shrug.

“You had dinner together last night,” he pointed out.

“We were used to sharing the shower. Yesterday is ages,” she quipped back with a mischievous grin.

Kaz sighed, a sense of impending doom washing over him. Whenever he was left alone with her friends, there was always at least one who hit on him, just to see him panic. He could already imagine the teasing and the sly comments that would ensue.

“Have you decided what to wear yet?” he asked, trying to shift his focus and curious about her choice. She had been bugging him about it for days, seeking his opinion on various outfits.

“Yes, my engagement ring,” Y/N said with a grin, turning to look at him, her eyes sparkling with mischief.

Kaz shot her an unamused glare. “Y/N,” he said, trying to sound stern but failing miserably.

“All this time and you’re still terrified of me,” she cooed, getting closer to mess with his already messy bed-hair.

“Yes,” he chuckled, a sense of warmth spreading through him despite the playful banter.

Kaz was finishing getting ready when he heard the noise of Y/N's friends entering their house, already screaming excitedly. He took a deep breath, bracing himself for the onslaught. It was a relatively small gathering, just the two of them, Y/N’s ex-roommates, Nina and Matthias, and Jesper and Wylan. They had decided to keep the engagement news between themselves and a few close friends for as long as they could manage.

With a heavy sigh, Kaz reached the kitchen where the girls were already taking shots. The moment they saw him, the screaming intensified. At least they had stopped trying to hug him after one particularly memorable time when all three of them launched themselves at him to greet him, and he had almost had a heart attack on the spot.

“Finally, we thought you were hiding from us,” one of them teased.

“I was,” Kaz nodded, taking a shot from Y/N's hand.

“I want you at your best behavior tonight, please,” Y/N said, locking eyes with each of her friends, her tone half-serious, half-playful. “This party has to end with me and Nina as best friends.”

“Best friends?” Kaz raised a brow, a hint of skepticism in his voice.

“At least friends,” Y/N conceded more realistically, “I like her when she forgets about my job and actually talks to me.”

Kaz pulled her closer, pressing her back against his chest. “You’ll be fine,” he murmured in her ear, his voice a comforting rumble.

He knew that she cared about his friends’ opinions, and considering they had definitely gotten off on the wrong foot, Y/N was trying to fix what was fixable. The tension between her and Nina, in particular, had been a point of stress. Kaz admired her determination to bridge the gap, to make amends and build a positive rapport with the people who mattered to him.

His friends arrived all together, and Y/N’s friends quickly pulled them into a chaotic mix of introductions and distributing drinks. The room buzzed with energy as everyone settled in.

“Nina, I love your dress! You look stunning!” Kaz heard Y/N’s enthusiastic voice cutting through the noise.

“Thanks, I bought it saving lives,” replied Nina, her tone matter-of-fact.

Kaz turned to see Y/N's enthusiasm dial down a notch, but she nodded and smiled anyway. “What can I get you to drink? I got that white wine you said you liked.”

If Nina was surprised by her unusual politeness, she didn't show it. “Wine is perfect.”

Kaz released a breath. Maybe it wouldn’t be a total disaster after all.

Music blasted through the speakers, drinks flowed freely. Kaz chatted with Matthias, the only two who managed to avoid being dragged onto the dance floor. Something felt off, though. There was an uneasy sensation in the back of his mind.

“Y/N,” Kaz called his fiancée from the improvised dance floor. She smiled and stumbled toward him, sitting on his lap and taking a sip from his glass, making a face of disgust.

“You don’t like it?” he laughed.

“Only on your lips,” she said, tapping his nose playfully.

“Y/N, where are the neighbors?” Kaz asked, his worried look betraying his concern. She had said she would handle them.

“Who?”

“Y/N, the neighbors.”

Y/N’s lips spread into a wide grin.

“Oh Ghezen, what have you done?” his concern deepened.

“Nothing! I went to politely invite them and they politely refused.”

“And?”

“And nothing, I politely brought them brownies,” she said with a small laugh, avoiding his gaze.

“When did you make brownies?” he raised a brow.

“Grandma’s brownies,” she specified in a guilty whisper.

Kaz’s eyes widened in disbelief. “You gave them edibles? You drugged our neighbors?”

“Drugged is such a strong word, Kaz! They’re just going to get a good night of sleep.” She shrugged, tracing her lips.

“I can’t believe this.” Kaz shook his head, half-amused, half-exasperated. “I didn’t even have time to try them.”

“Oh, so that’s the problem,” she laughed, clearly amused.

Kaz chuckled, pulling her closer.

***

One year later

Kaz was at home, deeply engrossed in the mundane task of emptying boxes from the recent move. After he and Y/N had gotten engaged, the topic of buying a house had come up often, but they kept pushing it off. That was until they stumbled upon a beautiful attic apartment with a spacious terrace. It hadn’t required much discussion—they simply knew it was the one. Without hesitation, they bought it, and now here they were, trying to make it their own.

As Kaz hung up clothes in their shared closet, Cinnamon, their energetic dog, dashed around the house, still exploring the new territory. Though they had moved in a few days earlier, Cinnamon’s excitement hadn’t worn off. Every corner still seemed like a new adventure.

Suddenly, Kaz heard Cinnamon’s barks grow more enthusiastic. The dog darted to the front door, her little paws scratching at the wood in a frenzy of joy. Kaz paused, listening closely, and sure enough, moments later, the door creaked open.

Y/N’s laughter filled the hallway as she greeted Cinnamon, who was practically vibrating with excitement. It was as if they hadn’t seen each other in years. Kaz smiled to himself, shaking his head as he grabbed his cane and made his way out to join them.

When Y/N spotted him, her grin widened even more. She dropped her purse onto the floor, not bothering to properly put it down, and rushed toward him. Without a word, she wrapped her arms tightly around him, pressing her body close to his.

“What’s all this enthusiasm about?” Kaz asked, his voice tinged with amusement as he returned her embrace, holding her close.

Y/N pulled back slightly, her eyes sparkling with something he couldn’t quite place yet. She fidgeted with her engagement ring, a familiar habit of hers when she was excited or nervous. “I’m done,” she said, her voice soft but full of meaning.

Kaz blinked, not quite understanding. “You’re done?”

“I’m retiring,” she said, her bright smile making her words even more surreal.

“You—what?” Kaz’s eyes widened in disbelief, the words not fully sinking in. “Are you sure?”

Y/N nodded, her smile only growing. She took his hands in hers, squeezing them gently. “Yes, I’m sure. I told my roommates earlier today. It was my last day.”

Kaz stood there, his mind racing as he processed her words. “Are you saying that—”

“We are getting married, love,” she whispered, cutting him off gently before pulling him into a long, tender kiss. 

***

Three years later

Kaz sat quietly in a corner, sipping his drink and trying to block out the noise of the children running around. The party was in full swing, filled with laughter, and the chaos of kids playing. It had become a common scene lately—ever since Nina and Matthias started having kids, it seemed like the gatherings always revolved around their growing family. They were already on their third child, and rumors were flying that Nina might already be pregnant again.

This time, it was one of their children’s birthdays, and everyone had gathered for the occasion. From his point, Kaz watched Y/N sitting cross-legged on the carpet, entertaining the birthday girl with a stuffed animal. The little girl’s delighted laughter filled the room, and Y/N’s face was lit up with a warm smile. It was a familiar scene; Y/N was always so good with children, her natural ease with them undeniable.

Jesper, appearing from nowhere, slid into the seat next to Kaz, grinning. “So? When are you going to pop out a little Brekker?” he asked, elbowing Kaz playfully. “You’ve been married for years now.”

Kaz took another sip, shrugging, trying to play it off. “We’re still thinking about it,” he replied, his tone deliberately nonchalant.

Jesper nodded toward Y/N, who was now lifting the birthday girl into her lap, spinning her around while the child giggled uncontrollably. “Look at her, man. She’s great with kids. You have to give up and have one already.”

Kaz’s lips pressed into a thin line as he muttered, “We’ll see.”

But the truth was, they’d been trying. They’d started trying for a baby not long after Y/N had left her job, both of them quietly optimistic. At first, they brushed off the lack of success, chalking it up to stress from wedding planning and the whirlwind of their new life together. But after months of no results—no pregnancy scares, no missed periods—they couldn’t ignore it anymore. Each month, Y/N’s cycle came right on schedule, a reminder of the growing distance between them and their hopes of starting a family.

Eventually, they had faced the possibility that something was wrong. It took time, and a lot of courage, but they finally decided to see a doctor. They sat in the sterile office, hands tightly clasped together, waiting for answers. And then the doctor’s words hit like a punch to the gut. 

It wasn’t that they couldn’t have kids— they could, just not with each other. Kaz’s sperm quality wasn’t optimal, and Y/N’s body, while healthy, wasn’t responding in a way that made pregnancy likely for them. The doctor had explained that Y/N might get pregnant if Kaz had healthier sperm, and that Kaz might be able to father children with another woman. But together? Their chances were close to non-existent.

The devastation was immediate. Right outside the doctor’s office, Y/N had broken down in his arms, her sobs heavy with disappointment and grief. Kaz held her as tightly as he could, his own heart breaking alongside hers, but he tried to soothe her the best he could. “We still have options,” he had whispered into her hair, “We’re young. There’s always adoption.”

But as the days passed, and they talked long into the nights, Y/N made a difficult decision. She wasn’t willing to go through the physical and emotional toll of IVF with such slim chances. The process was too invasive, the odds too low, and they both feared the heartbreak of trying and failing. It was a decision made out of love and self-preservation, one they agreed on, but it didn’t make it any less painful.

Over time, they learned to move past the sadness. They embraced their childless life, filling it with things they loved—spontaneous weekend trips, lazy mornings in bed, late-night adventures, and the freedom to live on their own terms. The pain still lingered beneath the surface, but they found solace in each other and in the life they were building, even if it wasn’t the one they had originally imagined.

They hadn’t shared the full story with their friends. It was still too raw, too personal. But for now, they were comfortable in their decision, finding joy in the quiet moments they shared. Watching Y/N laugh with the children at the party tugged at something in Kaz’s chest, but it wasn’t the same aching sorrow it once was. It was softer now, a bittersweet acceptance of what was and what could never be.

***

Fifteen years later

Kaz was pacing back and forth in the living room, his mind racing as he glanced at the clock. Y/N was late. She should've been home by now. He had called her a dozen times, but each attempt went straight to voicemail. Every unanswered ring only deepened his worry, a knot forming in his stomach. He didn’t like this—something felt wrong.

Finally, on what must have been the fifteenth call, someone answered.

"Love, where are you? I'm—" Kaz started, but a man's voice cut him off on the other end of the line.

"Mr. Brekker?" The unfamiliar voice made Kaz freeze.

"Y-yes?" Kaz’s heart began to pound, a creeping sense of dread overtaking him.

"Mr. Brekker, your wife was involved in a serious accident. She's currently in surgery at St. Vaska’s Hospital. You should come immediately."

For a moment, Kaz stood frozen in place, his mind reeling. The world around him seemed to blur, his thoughts racing ahead, but the urgency in the man’s voice brought him back to the moment. Without hesitation, he grabbed his keys and flew out of the apartment, leaving everything behind.

The drive to the hospital was a blur. Kaz’s mind was eerily blank, functioning only on autopilot. His hands gripped the steering wheel so tightly his knuckles turned white, but his thoughts refused to settle on anything concrete. Every second felt agonizing, like he was teetering on the edge of something he couldn’t control.

When he finally arrived at the hospital, the sterile lights and hurried movements of the staff did nothing to ease his anxiety. They guided him to a waiting room near the surgery wing, telling him it would be some time before Y/N was out of surgery. He sat down, but sitting felt impossible. He stood, then paced, then sat again—repeating the same motions over and over, trying to keep his fear at bay. Hours passed, each minute dragging on like an eternity.

He considered calling Alice a few times, but quickly dismissed the idea. She was already dealing with her own health issues, and the last thing she needed was added worry. Besides, he wasn’t even sure what to say. He couldn’t bring himself to acknowledge the worst-case scenario.

Finally, a doctor approached him, and Kaz felt his chest tighten.

"Mr. Brekker?" the doctor said, offering a tired but reassuring smile. "Your wife is out of surgery. You can relax; she's going to be okay. Both your wife and the baby are safe."

Kaz blinked, his mind struggling to process the doctor's words. "The baby?" he repeated, his voice thick with disbelief.

The doctor chuckled lightly. "Yes, your baby. Your wife is almost four months pregnant, Mr. Brekker. You didn’t know?"

Kaz stood there, too stunned to respond. His brain tried to catch up with what the doctor had just said. Pregnant? They had stopped even considering the possibility ages ago. After all the failed attempts and the devastating news from the doctors, they had made peace with the idea of not having children. They’d grown to love their life as it was—just the two of them.

Before he could ask more questions, the doors opened, and they wheeled Y/N into the recovery room. She was still unconscious, her face pale, bruised, and covered in bandages, but she was alive. Kaz rushed to her side, his hand instinctively reaching for hers. He pushed a few strands of hair away from her face, his touch gentle, almost reverent. Despite the injuries, despite the bandages, she was safe. 

And pregnant.

He sat down beside her, staring at her peaceful face, barely able to process what was happening. He thought about the past years, how they’d thrown themselves into their lives, embracing the freedom that came with being childless. They had taken trips, stayed out late, and enjoyed their spontaneous lifestyle. But now, out of nowhere, they were going to be parents.

Kaz couldn’t stop the smile that tugged at the corners of his mouth. His mind replayed moments from the past few months. Y/N had put on a little weight, but he had thought it was due to her finally being at peace with her body. After battling eating disorders for so many years, she had been making such great progress. She looked healthy and radiant, better than ever. It hadn’t even crossed their minds that she might be pregnant.

He leaned down, placing a soft kiss on her forehead, the feeling of relief finally settling in. He whispered quietly, almost to himself, “We’re going to be okay.” 

Hours had passed, and Kaz hadn’t moved from Y/N's side. He watched the steady rise and fall of her chest, the quiet beeps of the machines providing a strange comfort in the otherwise sterile room. He had been holding her hand, his thumb absentmindedly brushing against her skin, as though the constant touch would somehow anchor them both to reality. His mind was still spinning with everything the doctor had told him. 

Pregnant. It was surreal.

He had no idea how to feel, and that uncertainty gnawed at him. There was joy, yes, but also fear. 

Finally, Y/N stirred. Kaz sat up straighter, watching as her eyes fluttered open, slow and groggy. She blinked a few times, clearly disoriented, her gaze taking in the room before settling on him. A soft, weak smile curved her lips, but Kaz could see the pain lurking behind her eyes.

“Hey,” she whispered, her voice hoarse from disuse.

“Hey,” Kaz replied, leaning closer. His voice was softer than usual, an edge of worry still lingering. “How do you feel?”

“Not good,” she tried to make a weak smile, but winced as she shifted slightly in the bed. “What happened? The last thing I remember is—" She paused, her brow furrowing as she tried to piece the fragments together.

“There was an accident,” Kaz said, his tone steady despite the turmoil still swirling inside him. “But you’re okay now. You’re safe.”

Y/N exhaled a shaky breath, her body relaxing just a little. She squeezed his hand, her touch reassuring, but her eyes still searched his face, sensing that something else was going on.

“There’s… something you need to know,” Kaz started, his heart beating a little faster. He wasn’t sure how to tell her, how to put this kind of news into words. “The doctors found something when they were treating you.”

Her eyes widened in alarm, panic flashing in them. “Is it bad? Am I—?”

“No, no,” Kaz quickly reassured her, his hand tightening around hers. “It’s not bad. It’s just… unexpected.” He took a deep breath, meeting her eyes with a mix of awe and disbelief. “You’re pregnant.”

Y/N stared at him, her eyes going wide, her lips parting in shock. “What?”

“The doctor said you’re almost four months along,” Kaz continued, his voice softer now, gentler. “You didn’t know.”

Y/N’s hand instinctively went to her stomach, her fingers pressing against the fabric of her hospital gown. “Pregnant?” she whispered, her voice barely audible. Her gaze drifted down as if she was trying to comprehend this new reality, as if her body suddenly felt different to her.

Kaz nodded, watching her closely, unsure of how she would react. Her expression was a mixture of shock, disbelief, and something else—something softer, something that mirrored the feeling stirring inside him.

“I didn’t even realize…” she murmured, her voice trailing off as her fingers gently traced her stomach. “I thought we couldn’t—” She stopped herself, her eyes filling with tears.

Kaz leaned forward, his forehead almost touching hers. “I know,” he said quietly. “That’s what they said.”

For a moment, they both sat there, stunned by the realization that after all the heartbreak, after everything they had been through, the thing they had given up on was happening.

Tears slipped down Y/N’s cheeks, but her smile was radiant, brighter than Kaz had ever seen. She laughed softly, almost in disbelief. “A baby?”

Kaz let out a breath and nodded. “A baby,” he echoed, his voice barely above a whisper.

Y/N’s laughter turned into a soft sob, and Kaz gently wiped away her tears with his thumb. She was overwhelmed, but the happiness in her eyes was unmistakable. She reached for him, pulling him into a gentle, tender kiss. 

Y/N’s laugh was soft, though tinged with disbelief. “Aren’t we a bit old for a baby?” she teased, the humor in her voice doing little to mask the shock she was still processing.

Kaz chuckled, though his own shock was evident as well. “Well, apparently not,” he replied, his hand gently squeezing hers. The room felt lighter, despite the weight of the news they had just received.

Just then, a nurse entered the room, clipboard in hand. She had a gentle, reassuring smile, but her expression shifted when she saw the mix of emotions on their faces—tears glistening in Y/N’s eyes, Kaz looking more vulnerable than usual. 

“Is everything okay?” the nurse asked, her tone soft and careful.

Y/N looked up at her, her voice shaky but filled with hope. “Is it true? Am I really pregnant?” she asked, her hand instinctively resting on her abdomen as if she were trying to feel the truth for herself.

The nurse’s smile widened. “You didn’t know?” she asked, surprised. “I thought for sure you’d have noticed some signs by now.”

Y/N shook her head, a soft laugh escaping her lips. “We had no idea,” she admitted, glancing at Kaz, who nodded in agreement, still processing the enormity of it all.

“Well, congratulations! You’re a little over four months along,” the nurse confirmed, her eyes bright as she shared the news.

Four months meant they had been oblivious for nearly half the pregnancy. The shock of it was almost comical, though neither of them could laugh just yet. 

“Wait a second,” the nurse said, setting down her clipboard. “I’ll be right back.” She left the room quickly, leaving them in a quiet moment of stunned silence.

Kaz couldn’t help but chuckle under his breath, shaking his head in disbelief. He moved closer to the bed, leaning down to kiss Y/N’s forehead. “You really didn’t feel anything?” he asked softly.

“I thought I was just getting soft,” Y/N joked with a small smile, her hand still resting protectively on her belly. “I didn’t want to fall back into those old habits,” she admitted, her voice softening. “So, when I noticed the weight gain, I didn’t let myself obsess over it. I thought it was a good thing—proof that I was healing.”

Kaz reached out, his fingers brushing her cheek. “You are healing,” he said firmly. 

Before they could say much more, the nurse returned, wheeling in a portable ultrasound machine. “I thought you might want to see your little one,” she said warmly, setting it up beside the bed.

Y/N’s breath caught in her throat. Kaz was already at her side, holding her hand as the nurse prepped her for the ultrasound. The cool gel was applied to Y/N’s belly, and the nurse moved the probe gently across her skin.

“Ready?” the nurse asked, glancing at them with a smile.

“Yeah,” Y/N whispered, gripping Kaz’s hand a little tighter. Kaz gave her a reassuring squeeze, his eyes fixed on the screen.

The room was quiet for a moment, the only sound being the soft whir of the machine. Then, suddenly, the screen flickered to life, revealing the unmistakable image of their baby. The soft, rhythmic sound of the heartbeat filled the room, steady and strong.

Y/N gasped, her free hand flying to her mouth. Tears welled up in her eyes as she stared at the screen. “That’s... that’s our baby,” she whispered, her voice cracking with emotion.

Kaz was speechless, his gaze locked on the tiny, fluttering heartbeat. He’d been through countless challenges in his life, but this—this was something entirely different. Something he never imagined he’d experience.

“There they are,” the nurse said, her voice soft, pointing to the screen. “Your baby looks perfect.”

Y/N let out a soft sob, overwhelmed with emotion. Kaz bent down to kiss her forehead again, his own eyes misting with unshed tears.

“I can’t believe it,” Y/N whispered, her voice full of wonder. “We’re going to be parents.”

Kaz nodded, his throat tight with emotion. He could hardly believe it himself, but there it was, right in front of him—proof that life had a way of surprising you, no matter how much you thought you had things figured out.

The nurse smiled at them both, clearly moved by the moment. “I’ll print out some pictures for you to take home,” she said, quietly excusing herself to give them a moment alone.

Once she left, the room fell into a quiet, reverent hush. Y/N stared at the screen, her fingers tracing the faint outline of the baby that would soon become their whole world. Kaz, still gripping her hand, couldn’t help but smile—an uncharacteristically soft, genuine smile.

“We really did it,” Y/N said, laughing through her tears.

Kaz nodded, his heart full. “Yeah,” he whispered, “we really did.”

They sat in silence, just watching the screen, watching their baby. Neither of them needed to say anything—words would never be enough to capture what they were feeling in that moment. 

***

As Y/N and Kaz gathered their closest friends for dinner, a blend of excitement and anxiety hung in the air. After years of hiding their struggles with fertility, they knew it was time to share the truth. Jesper, Nina, Wylan, and Matthias filled the cozy home with chatter, oblivious to the weight of the moment ahead.

Kaz glanced at Y/N, her hand resting on her growing belly, and they exchanged a knowing look. It was time.

“Alright, everyone,” Kaz began, his voice steady yet tinged with nerves as he cleared his throat. “We wanted to share something important with you all tonight.”

Nina looked up, her curiosity piqued. “What’s going on?”

Kaz hesitated for a moment, feeling the weight of the words he was about to say. 

He took a deep breath, preparing to lay bare their past struggles. “Shortly after our wedding, we were told by doctors that we likely wouldn’t be able to have children.”

The room fell silent, the laughter fading as the weight of Kaz’s revelation settled over them. Jesper’s smile faltered, replaced by a look of disbelief. “Wait, what? You were told that?”

Nina’s eyes widened, and she reached for Y/N’s hand. “How did you keep this from us for so long?”

Y/N felt the tears prick at her eyes as she spoke. “We didn’t want to burden you all with that. We thought we could just move on and accept it.”

Matthias furrowed his brow, processing the information. “That’s… a long time to carry that alone.”

Kaz nodded, a wave of emotion washing over him. “We found our ways to cope, with time we accepted it.”

“But then something unexpected happened,” Y/N said, her voice gaining strength. 

Kaz felt the excitement building within him, ready to share the twist in their story. “And now… Y/N is pregnant.”

A stunned silence filled the room, and it was as if the air had been sucked out of it. Jesper blinked in disbelief. “Wait, are you serious? After everything you just said?”

“Yes, actually pregnant,” Y/N confirmed, laughter mingling with tears as she wiped her eyes. “Almost six months.”

Nina was the first to recover, her eyes sparkling with joy as she rushed over to hug Y/N tightly. “Oh Saints! This is incredible! How did you keep this a secret?”

“We were still processing it ourselves,” Y/N chuckled, overwhelmed by the wave of love surrounding her. “We didn’t want to share anything until we were sure everything was going fine.”

Matthias, who had remained silent, stepped forward, his expression a mix of happiness and shock. “This is unbelievable. I can’t believe you went through that all those years and now… you’re having a baby?”

Kaz nodded, feeling a smile stretch across his face. “We really had no hope left.”

Jesper’s eyes darted between Kaz and Y/N, his mind racing. “That’s mind-blowing!”

“Right?” Y/N beamed, her heart swelling as she felt the support of her friends. “It’s been a rollercoaster, but we’re ready, kinda.”

Wylan grinned, his eyes bright with excitement. “Have you thought about names yet?”

Kaz chuckled, shaking his head. “We’ve barely wrapped our heads around the fact that we’re going to be parents!”

As the conversation flowed, filled with laughter and joyful exclamations about the future, Y/N and Kaz exchanged relieved smiles. They had faced their fears, shared their long-held secret, and were met with nothing but love and support from their friends.

***

Baby fever hit Kaz and Y/N like a whirlwind, consuming their every thought and action. The moment they discovered they were having a girl, they could hardly contain their excitement. Eager to share the news, they rushed to the hospital to find Alice, who had been recovering from her health issues. 

The atmosphere in the hospital was bright and sterile, but the excitement that radiated from Y/N and Kaz infused it with warmth. As they approached Alice's room, they could already hear her familiar, comforting laughter echoing down the corridor. 

When they entered, Alice looked up from her bed, her face lighting up with joy. “Oh hi! Look at you all smiling” she exclaimed, adjusting her glasses and beaming at them. 

“We have news!” Y/N blurted out, her eyes sparkling. 

“What is it?” Alice leaned forward, her curiosity piqued.

“We’re having a girl!” Kaz said, his voice thick with emotion. 

Alice’s eyes widened in surprise and delight. “A girl? Oh, that’s wonderful! Are you thinking about names?”

With shared glances filled with affection, Y/N replied, “We’ve decided to call her Miracle.”

Alice erupted in laughter, her joy echoing in the room. “Miracle? Are you kidding me?” 

Kaz and Y/N shared a confused look, “Why? Is it-”

“I get that it’s a miracle that you were able to have a baby, but you can’t be serious, come on! Miracle! I can’t believe you two.”

Alice laughed so much at them that they left the hospital still with flushed faces.They went straight to the nearest bookstore, bursting through the door with the shared mission of finding the perfect baby name book. 

***

On the day they finally held their baby girl for the first time, emotions surged through them. Y/N cradled the tiny bundle in her arms, her heart swelling with love.

Kaz stood close by, his heart aching as he watched Y/N gently caress their daughter’s cheek. “I’m so sorry she didn’t get to meet her,” he said softly, his voice barely above a whisper. 

A tear rolled down Y/N’s cheek, glistening in the light as she nodded, her heart heavy with the memory of Alice. “Me too,” she murmured, her voice thick with emotion. 

“Hey, little one,” she said, her voice steadying as she spoke to her daughter, “you have to thank your great-grandma for not naming you Miracle.” A chuckle escaped her lips, lightening the atmosphere just a bit. 

Kaz laughed softly, shaking his head in agreement. “Not our proudest moment, sorry Alice,” he said, a bittersweet smile on his face. 

[maplleaf]

Two tries, One success

[Gepard Landau x gn!reader]

Working as the manager of Mechanical Fever's famous bassist isn't as bad of a job as many would think. Serval originally wanted an assistant to sort out her workshop's data, but after seeing how you matched energies with her, she offered the position as Mechanical Fever's assistant not long after being hired.

It's good; your pay doubled and your boss is great as a friend and as an employer. It's been a year since working for Serval and you've never looked back in regret. You even got the chance to befriend her younger brother, Gepard.

Although recently, the two siblings have been acting strange.

At first Serval asked about your type, you answered the question by saying blonde, since at the time you find a blonde hair color attractive.

Then only a day later, Serval had to 'take leave' in the middle of the day; saying that Pela asked to meet her regarding some scheduling with rehearsals. Despite you not remembering Pela mentioning anything of the sort when seeing her yesterday...

Since she is your boss, you brushed it off. The workshop doesn't have days where an influx of clients would come in anyway. Additionally, current clients' orders are all finished and it's just a waiting game for any of them to pick their items up.

No Serval, no work, not even cleaning. The only thing moderately interesting is the plant you brought here as decoration for Serval.

In conclusion; you were bored as hell that day.

Which is why when the door opened, your body straightened up as a reflex; thinking it's one of the clients. Surprisingly, you were met with the sight of Serval's younger brother. A rush of excitement and joy hit you, almost subconsciously.

"Gepard? Serval didn't mention you coming here," you pointed out. As captain of the silvermane guards, he's usually busy with work. "Did you left something last week?"

The blonde didn't answer right away, in fact his eyes are looking at everything but you. "No, uhm, Is my sister not here?" Gepard asked, finally turning towards you.

"Nah, she said Pela wanted to talk to her urgently earlier," you answered. "I can tell her you're here though," you raised your phone as a way to tell Gepard how you could tell Serval about his visit.

"That... isn't necessary," he almost stammered, even to the point where you noticed. "Did my sister bring that in?" Gepard pointed to the plant beside you.

"I did actually. This old fella' looks like it fits in this place," your hand grabbed the small plant's pot, shaking it lightly as if it's talking. Using a voice for the plant, you began to talk for it like a puppet. "That's right, it was so cold out there."

Gepard chuckled at your antics, "you must take good care of it." He heard you hum in response, "if your sister did, she might sing it rock music for bedtime."

After you placed the pot back down, Gepard took a deep breath before spilling his true intention. "Are you perhaps busy this Saturday?" The Landau sibling had a light red dusting on his cheek, something blocked by the darker lighting of Nevermore workshop.

You raised an eyebrow at him in interest. Saturday... Mechanical Fever shouldn't be having any performances that day and the workshop is closed; leaving you with an open spot. "I'm not, why'd you ask?"

"I was wondering if we could..." Gepard's word trailed away, his blue eyes looking at yours with a strange gaze. It's beautiful, his eyes, like the carved geomarrow at the Everwinter Monument, but somehow more beautiful. It's mezmerizing, truly.

"...could teach me about plant management. I've been trying to take care of mine as a hobby, but they don't usually end well," Gepard finishes his sentence.

The room stayed quiet for a moment, though in Gepard's mind it's louder than all the concerts he's seen his sister performs. The silence ended when you chuckled, then laughed.

"Sorry sorry," you managed to muffled out. "It's just, Serval's been mentioning your 'hobby' for awhile and I didn't expect you to come to me for help," you leaned back against the chair with your arms crossed, "How about at noon here? I can ask Serval about opening the workshop for the day, sure she wouldn't mind if it's for you."

Gepard straightened his posture as a reflex, though his face does hold a certain embarassment that you didn't pick up. "Sure, I'll be glad," he smiled. "I think I'll have to go now, my break isn't long."

The blonde leaves the workshop in a hurry, not even hearing your words of parting. You found it strange how he behaved that day, and many days after to be exact.

The second time one of the Landau siblings acted weird was when Mechanical Fever's performance had just ended. Many people were asking for a photo or even signatures of the bandmates, especially Serval.

Since it all had technically wrapped up, you sat by the bench nearby to recharge from watching a fun yet exhausting performance. The air of overworld's Belobog is much colder in the evening, even with geomarrow heaters everywhere.

Your hand rubbed against eachother for heat and friction. It'll only be a short while until the band properly wraps up and have a little celebration in Serval's workshop. Though that short while felt like eternity when all you could feel is the eternal winter's air saying 'fuck you warmth!'

"You okay there?"

You looked up to see the familiar charming captain, his face full of worry. The thought of Gepard worrying made you conflicted to wether feel happy or guilty. "Yeah, just chilly," you responded, bringing your heated hands to your face for more warmth.

"You didn't bring a jacket?" Gepard asked, sitting right beside you. "It's usually not this cold at the evening, but winter has its ways."

"Well fuck whoever made this winter," whilst rubbing your hands again, you slipped out a few words of annoyance at the current state of temperature. Realizing the rudeness, you couldn't help but feel guilty, "sorry."

"It's fine but," Gepard looks at your sorry state and thought about it for a moment, leaving you to wonder what's in his pretty little head. Your thoughts stopped when he took off the white and blue scarf of his uniform and slid it around yours.

"Here."

You wanted asked what was he doing before feeling the heat. It's so... warm. Is this what he feels everytime going in the fragmentums filled with cold air? No wonder he could stand in a fight for so long, this thing is comfortable.

"You are an actual lifesaver, Landou," your almost trembling voice muttered, quickly relishing in the warmth that his scarf had given you. Gepard on the other hand felt his eyes being stuck on your figure; the snow of Belobog definitely made you look more ethereal than usual.

Gepard took a few moments before the spur of the moment outweighs his worries. "A new place opened up near Goethia hotel, I was wondering--"

"(y/n)! Hurry up, we're heading to Serval's," the pianist of Mechanical Fever yelled out, uncaring of the other people surprised at his sudden voice.

As the assistant of the band, you were already used to this by now. The blonde beside you is not used to it; and if that pianist is a fragmentum monster, he would've thrown a punch right then and there.

"Sorry, could you say that again?" you tried to ignore the pianist's wails, focusing on Gepard more considering he's not yelling at you.

"Right," Gepard coughed to ease himself back in the moment, "this wednesday, I was wondering if--"

"(y/n)!"

You winced in annoyance as that pianist's voice filled the streets of the district. Seriously, you hope Serval can knock some sense into the guy about the great knowledge that is patience. Seeing as he would probably keep yelling your name until you yield, your priorities had to change.

"Sorry, Gepard, could you continue that another time? I'm afraid a certain someone wouldn't shut their mouth if I don't come," you scoffed, side-eyeing the person in annoyance. Gepard looks at you with disappointment, a face you've never seen before.

"It's fine," the blonde answered, though when he sees you start taking off his scarf, his gloved hand prevented you from properly taking it off. "Just take it, you'll get cold on the way."

You raised an eyebrow at him unsurely, "... won't you get in trouble for giving this to a civilian?"

Gepard shook his head, instead gently tightening the scarf. "I have another at home," he brushed it off before backing away from you. "I'll... see you on another day."

The next day, you overheard a few guards talking about their Captain Landau; and how he seems to be missing a part of his uniform.

The third time is when Serval asked a specific question when you two were working. A client had given her an antique click to fix earlier on, the device taking over Serval's focus for the past two hours. You on the other hand had to sort out this month's profits and data regarding clients and business related items you two bought for the month.

"Say, what do you think of silvermane guards?" the blonde bassist asked you before extending her hand up to you expecting a tool. You naturally took the screwdriver and gave it to her, eyes still focused on the laptop.

"They're... fine," you answered. "What's with the random question?" Serval shrugged her arm, taking off her glasses as she leaned back and rested her eyes. Another fixing job for a complex antique done, it's amazing how someone could keep an object for a long time without realizing the broken gears it has.

"Everytime we go out to buy parts, you always glanced at the silvermane groups when they passed," the flinch coming from you became an answer to her assumption. Serval leaned on the table in front of her, blue eyes scanning you for any hints, "Interested in one of 'em?"

Seeing as lying would get you nowhere with the engineer, you took shaky breath, "just one."

Serval's eyes lit up like stars, "No way! Care to spill?" you averted your eyes from your boss' enthusiasm, finger tapping on the wood as a way to calm yourself. Even if she is your friend, it doesn't ease the nervousness.

"Well..." your voice trailed out.

"And what was the answer?"

Serval sighed, "said I knew the person." Her younger brother slumped down, tapping his feet for every half a second. "C'mon, we narrowed it down to a blonde and a silvermane guard I know! That's a pretty good chance," Serval tried to cheer him up, which sadly didn't do much.

"That doesn't narrow it down to one person," Gepard pointed out. At first, he noticed you sneaking glances when he was ordering guards near Belobog's alleyways. It gave him a hope that maybe this isn't unrequited; a hope that's lost the longer he thought about it.

"Maybe I should cancel it, I can't ruin our friendship because of this."

Serval smacked her brother's head lightly in a scolding manner. "Hey, I thought us Landau are hardworking and determined. You can't just give up now," she reminded him.

Even if Gepard's hesitance did stop for a moment, it didn't stop him from feeling nervous. Serval waited for her brother to speak up, her arm crossed on her chest. Gepard recalled how long he had been trying a confession, four weeks. Four grueling weeks and three tries of trying to ask you out in any way he could think of only to fail each time.

The first time he got too nervous when looking at your eyes gazing at him. The fear of rejection and making that look turn into something bad made him scared.

The second time one of Mechanical Fever's band members interrupted him. Maybe it's The Aeon of Preservation's way of telling him fate doesn't allow this to happen.

It's complicated; so many variables that caused him to worry over what ifs. For starters, his sister is your boss, then he might not even be your type personality wise. Gepard is usually a confident person, but something about you just makes him nervous all the sudden.

"What am I supposed to do?" Gepard asked, wanting some kind of advice from his carefree older sister. Serval sighed, leaning against her table to wrack an idea from her head.

"Tomorrow morning, I asked (y/n) to take care of the workshop since I have plans with some friends," she told him, "Try shooting your shot then, and don't chicken out this time."

Gepard thought about Serval's idea, ultimately considering it a good enough plan. "Sounds great. Thank you, sister," Gepard stood up properly after giving his appreciation to Serval.

A part of him feels guilty for falling with his sister's assistant. He didn't even realize he's falling for someone until he's already too late.

The blonde sighed, he can only pray to Qlipoth that you won't hate him for this.

After Gepard said his goodbyes to Serval, the cold air of Belobog hits him. Thankfully, his uniform made it so he's not feeling cold, but usually geomarrow heaters around the city would lessen the drop in temperature. He should've told his sister to fix the broken heater outside.

Unbeknownst to him, you were just done buying flowers from the shop near Nevermore workshop. Your hand clenched onto the bouquet of flowers hard as you noticed a familiar blonde in front of Serval's workshop.

The dark lighting that roams Belobog's night made it so he probably didn't realize it's you there. Even so, he did hear footsteps approaching him. "Gepard! Didn't expect to run into you," you greeted him.

"Oh, (y/n), hi. I was just visiting my sister," Gepard answered, your voice instantly making him nervous. He noticed the item you're carrying; a bouquet of sunshine flowers. From his hours of studying how to do gardening as a hobby, he also learned some of the meaning of flowers.

Sunshine is a flower that means "warmth and love of light" for the people of Belobog. He doesn't know if you knew what those flowers mean, but something inside his mind is causing him to feel scared.

Though, remembering you were still here, Gepard quickly swallowed that feeling in favor of being your friend. "Are you heading home?" Gepard asked, receiving a nod from you.

"Yeah, gotta take care of the workshop tomorrow," your hand held the bouquet slightly tighter. "Actually, do you mind walking me to my house?" your voice had a hint of hesitance to it. "I... still have your scarf from last time."

Gepard smiled at your worries. Yes, he did get questioned by his superiors about it before being given another scarf, but honestly, he didn't mind it since it results in your comfort. "You don't have to worry about that, I have another one."

"No!"

The sudden change of tone caught Gepard off guard, as you usually never raised a voice unless it's needed. Looking at your regretful expression and the hand nearing your mouth made Gepard think it wasn't fully intentional on your side either.

"Sorry, it's just," your words came into a stutter. "I want to take a walk with you tonight, is that possible?"

Gepard didn't know what to say in an instant, almost stuttering himself. Though, he does answer fast in fear you might think he feels reluctant to. "Of course," he answered, "Shall we go, then?"

"Yeah," you swallowed a lump in your throat and walked closer to the captain.

The walk is a relaxing one. Due to Jarilo-IV's eternal winter, weather at night have always been colder than at day; even with the heaters. Droplets of snow covered the both of you as the walk continued. Gepard is the first to break the silence, bringing up the flowers he noticed.

"Those are sunshine flowers, right?" he asked. "Yeah, I bought it for a friend," your voice almost seemed to hesitate on the last word. "It means love and warmth from what I remember."

Hearing you say that gives the knowledge to Gepard that you know the meaning of it, and if you're giving it to a friend then it means you feel some sort of love or warmth for the friend. That left a bitter taste in his mouth when he thinks about it.

"Warmth and love of light," Gepard added, when he sees your eyes looking at him in curiosity he felt the need to explain. "I've read some additional details when learning how to do gardening."

If it weren't for the barely lit street lamps, he would've been caught with a red face. "Love, huh..." your muttering were loud enough for Gepard to hear. "Have you ever been confessed to?"

Your question made Gepard wonder what to answer. If he were to say yes, does that lower the chances of you accepting his confession. But if he were to say no, would you really believe him?

"A few times, though I never really accepted them," Gepard side-eyed you, trying to pinpoint any kind of reaction. He could see your hand holding onto the bouquet tight, even so he doesn't know if it's due to nervousness or just from the cold.

"I see," your voice trailed out. The walk continued on quietly, but it's not awkward per se.

For Gepard, his mind is clouded with doubt for tomorrow's plan. If he were to be planning a confession, he would ask for some kind of advice from someone he knows well. For him it was Serval, but maybe for you it's him.

Before either of you could realize it, you two are already in front of your home. "Looks like we're here," Gepard said unsurely. He isn't exactly sure if you would give back his scarf or not, considering he rejected the offer earlier.

"Right," you took a deep breath before turning to face the blonde, your movements as stiff as a robot. Your hand held onto the bouquet with shaking fingers, eyes unsure where to look but eventually locking to Gepard's blue ones.

After a moment of silence and you biting your lips to form words, any words, you finally spoke.

"You are a wonderful person to be around, I always enjoy talking to you even if it's just for a few minutes," your voice is low, scared even. The fear of losing someone causing hesitation between each words spoken.

"And you might feel otherwise, but fuck, I want to be selfish just this once." You took in another breath of air to prepare yourself. Your arms extended towards Gepard, offering him the bouquet of flowers. "I like you, like really like you."

Your voice trembled, but not because of the coldness in the air but the warmth that slowly crept up to your head. Heartbeat going louder than any of Serval's performances.

Gepard's own state isn't far different than yours. His mind slowly processed your words as his cheeks is engulfed in a light pink hue. For almost a month he was worried every time he thought about it; head slamming against the wall thinking on what to say and what to do for a confession.

"It seems you did what I was planning to do."

His hand took the flowers, happiness written all over his face expressed by a soft and endearing smile. "I feel the same way, for awhile now to be exact," Gepard took a deep breath before letting out small chuckles of his own.

"Sorry, its just nice to see that I'm not alone," his admittance made you laugh yourself. It's good that your house doesn't have many street lamps in front of it, or else the two of you might've been exposed for the redness in both of your faces.

It's strange. Just a moment ago the cold air of Belobog had started to settle in, but now all you could feel is the wamrth coming from your own face. Though, after properly processing Gepard's reponse you realized the opportunity laid properly at this moment.

"I have a ticket-- sorry, two tickets, to the Golden Theater next week at 12. If you're free, we could go together," your voice came back happily, glee and excitement coming from the tone.

"Like a date?"

Your eyes lit up as Gepard continued it for you, hearing it as a confirmation that he might be okay with the idea. "Yeah, like a date."

"Of course, I would love to," Gepard answers, his beautiful smile still brightly seen even with the dark lighting. Your face mirrored his, still nervous as hell, but happily nervous.

Realizing the time, you felt bad for making Gepard stand in front of your home for so long. "Great! I'll see you another day then," you argued with yourself for a few moments before going with the nervous adrenaline telling you what impulses to do.

Matching yourself to Gepard's height, you dropped a small kiss on his cheek; causing the blonde to be caught off guard as his face heats up more.

"Can't wait for next week," you muttered loud enough for him to hear before bolting to your door to avoid any chances that he'll see your state; an obvious nervous wreck. As you entered your own home, mumbles of questions leaves your mind, all relating to your actions not even a minute ago.

Meanwhile, Gepard is left still in front of your home dumbfounded and processing what had just happened. His eyes darted to the bouquet again; yellow petals looking back at him, giving him hope for what comes in the future.

[chaifootsteps]

Honestly the whole moment of Stolas getting mad at Blitzo for not being there or warning him abt Striker really just makes no sense the more and more you think abt it.

Like first off, he called right in the middle of Loona’s important shot while not acting scared or urgent in the slightest in his call, of course Blitzo wouldn’t think it’s the biggest deal.

Secondly, the fact that really most of the time Blitzo has always been good at protecting Stolas, even when he didn’t have to.

In ep 2, Blitzo had no benefits to being a bodyguard besides money. Like he said, that’s not their type of job and it’s not a part of their deal, if I.M.P. really didn’t want/need any extra money atm they could just say no (and the end Stolas proves he really didn’t need one the whole time, just wanting to make sexual comments at him).

And in HM, Blitzo could have easily gone with Striker to kill him and take the book, maybe have to go on the lamb or something but still, at the end of the day Blitz still made the decision to save him. And even in WE, he still did send Moxxie and Millie who did end up saving him and he got sent back to the hospital (where he was perfectly fine in his next appearance). They got the job done and helped him!

Lastly, just how many times has Stolas saved IMP? Only one time. Sure it was impressive using his powerful form, and they were pretty much abt abt to be done for by the agents, but really that only one single time really gets undermined by the fact that the very first time Stolas first proposed their deal, the foundation of this whole relationship in the first place?

It was made while putting Blitzo’s life at risk. In ep 1 Stolas makes his call while Blitzo is in the middle of literally being hunted down and nearly killed, while he can see everything in his bubbles, and gets him to make this deal. When he’s full aware he’s in such a situation where he can’t fully give a good consensual agreement to it bc he is literally on the run.

I’m genuinely surprised they didn’t have Blitzo bring this up once during the entire argument in Apology Tour, when this is how their deal all begin. They can have Stolas ask why didn’t Blitzo save him or tell him abt Striker, but why couldn’t Blitzo just as easily bring up in retaliation why didn’t Stolas save him with his demon form in ep 1? Or why did he purposely choose to start this deal when he when he knew it was a bad time? When he was basically putting his life at risk?

If im being honest, it’s entirely stupid, and it’s annoying that the show will pick and choose which scenes to take seriously, bc Stella literally was screaming at the top of her lungs that she hired someone to kill him in the end scene of HM why didn’t his dumbass care abt that lol.

Stolas, as a general rule, is absolutely terrible at ignoring things that are literally being screamed in his face. Things like "I've hired an assassin to kill you" and "The way you treat me makes me feel bad" and "I don't want to have sex with you."

[melanieph321]

Ruben Dias x Reader - Fix You Part 5/10

Part 6 and 7 are out on my Patreon!

Summary - Reader is hired as Ruben's assistant nurse after receiving head trauma during a football game. He has fallen into a deep depression on his road to recovery and does not accept much help from Reader as she only reminds him of how incapable he is.

Enjoy!

"Ahhh." Ruben winced.

"Please, I didn't even touch you."

"Have you even shaved someone's beard before?"

You hadn't. However, you convinced Ruben to let you trim his before the doctor's appointment he had that afternoon.

You set up a makeshift barber station in the living room, complete with a mirror, clippers, and a pair of scissors. Ruben sat down in a chair, and you got to work, carefully trimming his beard to the perfect length.

"Just hold still Ruben, you're being a big baby."

"I'm being a what?"

"A big baby."

"Is that so?"

"Yes." You said, grabbing a hold of his chin to prevent him from moving his head again. However, he kept on snapping it your way, like the bandage that covered his eyes was to no use.

"Just don't cut my throat." He mumbled.

"Why are you so grumpy today?"

"Am I?"

"Yes, Ruben. Even your mom said so."

"You spoke to my mom, when?"

"I called her and thought I'd invite her to come to your doctor's appointment."

"And? What did she say?"

"Unfortunately she's busy."

"Good."

"Good?" You frowned. "Ruben, don't you want someone other than me to come with you to this appointment? Today's test results might mean that you get to remove your bandages completely."

"No." Ruben muttered. "I don't want them to be disappointed."

It has happened before. Ruben's previous test results had denied him his eyesight. Perhaps he didn't dare to raise his own or his family's expectations anymore. However, you remained optimistic. So optimistic that when you arrived at the doctor's office that day, you were squeezing Ruben's arm in anticipation of his results. You were so happy when the tests indicated that Ruben's brain activity had reached a healthier state, allowing his senses to be a bit more stimulated again.

"Alright, Mr Dias," The doctor said, tugging the bandage away from Ruben's eyes. "Or perhaps I should say, welcome back."

It was a beautiful moment. You watched Ruben bat his eyes as the daylight struck them. Once they were adjusted he turned his head, discovering the world like a curious child.

"Is it blurry?" You asked.

Ruben's eyes met yours in a heartfelt moment that seemed to stop the motion of everything around you.

"Y/N?" He seemed unsure. Perhaps he had another picture of you in his mind. Nevertheless, you smiled at him and he smiled back at you. You would have gone on smiling forever if it hadn't been for Ruben's brother spamming your phone with hundreds of text messages.

"That's weird."

"What is?" Ruben asked, seeing the furrowed expression on your face.

"Ivan wants us to meet him downtown. He says it's urgent."

It was an odd place to meet. Outside of a black brick building. Outside the back of it, where the dumpster were kept.

"Ivan what's going on?" Ruben asked. "Why are we in Deansgate of a places?"

Ivan grinned at the sight of his brother. It hit you that it was the first time in a long time that he had seen Ruben without bandages covering his eyes. "Happy birthday brother." Ivan said, pulling Ruben in for a hug.

"Happy birthday day Ruben."

You clenched the phone in your hand as he turned to you.

"You knew?" He frowned.

You shrugged. "Why did you think I fought to shave your beard?"

It wasn't a hard kept secret. You got the date of Ruben's birthday off the internet. However, when you asked his family about it they informed you that Ruben really didn't care much for birthdays, that he hadn't celebrated one in years. Nevertheless, you insisted that today was worth celebrating, considering the high chances of Ruben getting his bandages taken off.

"Come on bro, everyone's waiting." Ivan gestured for the two of you to follow him through the backdoor. It led you through a corridor lit up by neon lights. And as you followed the sound of the music, you were taken aback by how many they were.

"Surprise!"

You had expected Ruben's family and a handful of friends to help surprise Ruben on his birthday. However, there were about a hundred people greeting you as you entered.

"Happy birthday you minger." A man with slick back hair patted Ruben on the shoulder.

"Jack, you came?"

Ruben seemed equally surprised that so many of friends showed up.

"Of course I came." The man laughed. "Your mom is cooking, isn't she?"

It was my first time seeing Ruben, laughing without being sarcastic. Not one of those half hearted laughs that he would give you. But a real laugh, that made the corners of his eyes crease.

"Come on man, you won't believe what Kyle bought you."

"Kyle is here?"

"Everyone's here."

You watched as Ruben was ushered away by his friends. They weren't just regular people. You recognized many of them from TV and magazines. There were football players, supermodels, luxury brand owners and the list went on. It hit you how small you were in Ruben's world. Perhaps how insignificant the part you played was.

"Pretty cool, eh?"

"Max."

It calmed your heart to see a familiar face. Max, who dressed up for the occasion, replacing his tracksuit with a jacket and tie.

"I can't believe you got him to come." He said.

"What can I say, I'm a great liar."

"You mean you're a great actress."

"Why thank you." You bowed your head with courtesy.

"Ruben is really lucky to have you in his life. Me too."

"Stop it." You blushed. "You've only known me for three weeks."

"Yes, but I've seen nurses come and go within a day. Trust me, Ruben likes you."

"You think so?" His words aroused something within you. A sudden need to run into Ruben's arms and beg him to never let you go.

"I know so." Max winked. "Now enjoy the party, kid. But not too much. You're still on the clock."

You rolled your eyes as Max went away. Unlike you, he seemed so close to everyone in Ruben's family. His brother, his mother...They all loved him for everything he has done.

"Y/N, right?"

You turned around hearing someone call your name. "Joshua?"

********************************************

Ruben had been out of commission for weeks, ever since he had suffered a severe head trauma. But that didn't stop him from meeting up with his friends. It had been Ruben's own choice to avoid people for so long. Limiting himself to a sphere where only he existed and where the world revolved around him. All that changed when he met you. Now he found himself out and about again, taking the next steps to becoming the man he really was, the man you deserved to know him as.

"How about another round of shots!" His friends cheered. The majority of them were his teammates. And when it came to alcohol consumption, Jack Grealish was in charge.

As they made their way to the bar, Ruben could feel his heart racing. The lights and sound of the music was a bit overwhelming, and he could feel a sense of nausea kicking in. He tried to push through it, but it quickly became clear that he was in over his head.

"You good, man?" Asked John, another one of his teammates.

"I....I think I need to go," he said, voice shaking. "I'm feeling really sick."

Ruben rushed in the direction where he had come from, in the direction where he had left you. Although his vision had begun to deceive him, he recognized your silhouette from far away. You stood talking to some guy, a guy Ruben didn't know. It made his blood boil more than it already was. And by the look on your face Ruben appeared just the way he felt.

"Oh my God, Ruben, are you okay?"

You took one look at him and knew that he was in trouble. "Come on, we'll get you home," you said, taking his arm and leading him out of the club.

As you walked, Ruben could feel his nausea getting worse and worse. The bright lights of the city were like knives stabbing into his brain, and the sound of the traffic was like a never-ending drumbeat. He knew that he needed to get out of there, and fast.

Finally, you made it back to Ruben's apartment, where you helped Ruben into bed. He lay there, feeling the nausea wash over him like a wave, but at least he was in a safe place.

"I'll call Max and tell him where we went."

"No, just..." Ruben grunted. "Stay with me."

"Ruben, I think it's best if I call a doctor first to let them..."

"Please." Ruben used all his strength to grab your arm, desperately needing you by his side. "Stay with me, please."

You seemed conflicted but eventually gave in, kicking off your shoes and joining Ruben under the covers. He kept his eyes closed, his breath brushing past your cheek as you lay face to face.

"Thank you." He whispered. "For getting me out of there."

You smiled and stroked his hair. "You're going to be okay. We'll take things slow, and you'll be back to normal in no time."

Ruben nodded, feeling a sense of gratitude towards you. It was actually more than a sense. If the choice was his he would live and die this way, with you in his arms, your hands in his hair.

He opened his eyes to see the look of concentration that you had and how that look faltered when you caught him staring.

"Can I kiss you?"

"Ruben…I don't think that's a good idea."

"I disagree." He chuckled. "I think it's the best idea I've ever had."

Silence crept. Ruben had gone to shut his eyes again, assuming that you had done the same. But then there was movement, a slight dip in the bed as the warmth from your body enclosed on him. Ruben's eyes flickered as he felt your soft lips brush against his. It was a gentle kiss. One that cured him of his nausea.

"Don't open your eyes." You whispered.

"Will you be here in the morning?" Ruben stretched out his arms to wrap around you, pulling you close. You let him, and cuddled your head to rest under his chin.

"I will be here, but not in your bed."

"Fair enough." Ruben yawned. At least he had this moment. A moment when you belong to him and only him.

Part 6 and 7 are out on my Patreon!

[hayleythesugarbowl]

hey I don’t know if you’re still writing for Thomas barrow but if you are can you write one where the female reader is the one who finds Thomas kissing Jimmy instead of Alfred? And maybe the reader and Thomas are kind of enemies before that? But she covers for him/helps him anyways? Thank you so much I love your Thomas barrow series 💌

Even || Thomas Barrow & female!reader

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ masterlist • thomas barrow masterlist ⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚

summary: when you, a ladies maid who thomas has never got along with in the past, catch thomas making a move on jimmy you’re forced to decide wether or not to help him out

word count: 3.4k

warning: mild cursing, homophobia because it’s jimmy, speaking of which also jimmy slander if you squint

a/n: ok I’m sorry it took me so long to get to this!! I actually had an idea similar to this so thank you so much for requesting this love <3💌🍒💋

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~°~❦~°~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

     “Miss (Y/l/n)?”

     You looked up from your stitching to see a man staring down at you.

     Thomas Barrow.

     His eyebrows were raised expectantly and you fought the urge to roll your eyes as he waited for you to acknowledge him.

     “To what do I owe this pleasure?” You prompted.

     “Mrs. Hughes is looking for you. Something about one of Her Ladyship’s evening gowns.”

     You smiled your sweetest smile up at the footman-turned-valet.

     “Well, I appreciate you passing along the message,” you said as you continued to hem the skirt you were working on. 

     Still, Thomas didn’t leave. “You’d best get going, don’t you think? Mrs. Hughes sounded pretty urgent and I wouldn’t want you to get involved in any unfortunate circumstance.”

     “No you wouldn’t,” you muttered under your breath sarcastically as you got up and walked down the hall. 

     You and Thomas didn’t exactly get on, to put it mildly. Honestly you’d be surprised if Mrs. Hughes even needed you and it wasn’t all just a ploy by Thomas to waste your time. It wouldn’t be the first time, you thought sardonically. 

     From the moment you arrived at the Abbey, Thomas had began his life’s mission of forever tormenting you and making your work at Downton just a little bit harder. You had tried to be friendly to him at first, but to no avail for he seemed determined to let you know that you didn’t belong here. 

     Not that he was particularly amiable with any of the downstairs staff, but he seemed to especially have it out for you.

Most likely because you were the only one who challenged. He wasn’t the only one who could come up with sabotaging schemes.

     And he did have so many bloody schemes. 

     Like the time right after you’d been hired when he’d convinced you that even though you weren’t a part of the kitchen staff, you needed to pick up some groceries for Mrs. Patmore. He sent you into town and you’d been lost for hours searching before you’d ran into Anna—bless her heart—who told you that the grocer was on the other side of town and the delivery wasn’t even supposed to be ready for another week.

     You’d gotten him back (with some help from Mrs. O’Brien, who’d been feeling particularly miffed at Thomas that day and was willing to return the favor in any way she could) by shrinking His Lordship’s trousers.

     The furious yet shocked look on his face—like he’d finally found a worthy competitor—still brought a smile to your face on particularly dark days. 

     Needless to say, your relationship had been filled with nothing but stiff quips,  scathing remarks, and the occasional act of sabotage since then. 

     You reached your destination and peered into Mrs. Hughes office.

     “Mr. Barrow said you needed me?” 

     “And Mr. Barrow would be right,” Mrs. Hughes agreed, turning to you and smiling wryly. “I can’t make heads or tails of this gown.”

     You picked up the mess of fabric she had gestured to and set to work mending. The skirt you were working on could wait.

     As you turned the dress over, you couldn’t help but smirk to yourself. Thomas? Truthful for once?

     He must have some ulterior motive.

     You’d be surprised if the skirt was still there when you got back—or if it didn’t have significantly more holes than when you’d left it. 

₊˚ ✧ ‿︵‿୨୧‿︵‿ ✧ ₊˚

     You walked into the servants hall the next morning, tired as hell from working on Her Ladyship’s gown all night. 

     You practically fell into your chair as Daisy came around and poured your tea. You thanked her absentmindedly as you began to nibble on some toast.

     “Don’t you look nice, Miss (Y/l/n),” Thomas smiled at you but it was all but a compliment.

     O’Brien smirked beside him and you narrowed your eyes at both of them. 

     “Nice of you to take notice,” you shot back.

     “Is it a crime, to butter up one’s coworker?” He kept eye contact with you as he stirred his tea slowly.

     “Depends who’s doing the buttering,” you leveled your gaze at his dark eyes.

     “Speaking of butter, can we get any around here?”

     A blond man sauntered into the room, taking a seat at the servants table and looking around at the present company. You felt Thomas shift across from you.

     “I’m serious, just because we’re working class don’t mean we have to eat turnips and bread our whole lives.” 

     “I beg your pardon, I didn’t know the King of England was visiting,” O’Brien mumbled. 

     “Only saying,” Jimmy said. “I’d like to be able to eat what I like, when I like without being an earl or a duke.”

     Jimmy Kent. The newest addition to the well-oiled machine that was Downton Abbey. And how could you forget? What, with all of the maids talking of nothing else since he arrived. You agreed that he was pleasant looking, but he was too much of a flirt for your liking. 

     He leaned back in his chair, as if daring anyone to contradict him.

     “And what would you like to eat, Jimmy?” Thomas glanced over at him.

     “All of England, if it pleases me.”

     “I’ll put in a good word with Mrs. Patmore,” Thomas smiled at Jimmy and you were baffled at how it actually looked genuine.

     In fact, Thomas had seemed to take a liking to Jimmy from the moment he arrived. He was about the only person who Thomas treated like an equal. 

     He must be using him, you thought. Trying to lure him into the trap of friendship before getting him fired or something of the like.

     “You most certainly will not,” Mrs. Patmore answered, walking into the room. “The moment I start taking requests from you lot—”

     “Is a moment that will not happen anytime soon,” Mr. Carson cut in from the head of the table glancing authoritatively at all of the servants finishing their breakfast.

     “Why would Mrs. Patmore take your word anyway,” you looked to Thomas, “When anything you recommend is likely to be made of cement?”

     “Feisty this morning, are we? Bold for the girl who, as I recall, left the Duchess of Frescershire quite unhappy with a dress that very likely felt like cement.” Thomas spat. 

     Your hand made a fist and you yearned to climb across the table and use it, but you checked yourself and only glared at the man across from you.

     Thomas raised an eyebrow at you, standing up and glancing in Jimmy’s direction before turning around and heading down the hall.

     “I think I’ll be going also,” O’Brien left her seat quickly, giving a small smile, her eyes following Thomas’s as she walked to catch up to him.

     Likely plotting, you thought. Well, let them to it. The last thing you needed to be doing right now in your tired state was wasting energy thinking about Thomas Barrow. 

     You finished your tea, exiting the room and preparing for your days work. The girls were already dressed, so you could devote your time to downstairs work for the time being.

     You passed Thomas and O’Brien in the hall, both of which quickly stiffened their posture and looked at you as you walked past, ceasing their very obvious confidence. But not before you heard the words certain, return, and Jimmy.

     You didn’t even want to bother figuring out what they were gossiping about. Nothing good, you knew that. Best to stay out of it while you still could.

     Thomas had nearly gotten you sacked a number of times and it wasn’t going to happen again.

₊˚ ✧ ‿︵‿୨୧‿︵‿ ✧ ₊˚

     Sleep. It was all you could think about as you walked down the hall, having finished your days work and being ever so ready to hit the hay.

     Everyone else had already gone to bed and you were the last to leave the servants hall. You were almost to your room, thinking of how to avoid waking the maid that you shared your room with, when someone called your name.

     “Miss (Y/l/n)?”

     “Mrs. Hughes.” You greeted her. 

     “Do you have minute?”

     “I suppose I do.”

     “I don’t like to ask you to do this, but Lady Mary has asked to have her purple evening gown from last season ready to wear tomorrow. I would ask one of the footmen as it’s through the men’s corridors, but you’re the only servant still awake—” 

     You internally cursed Lady Mary. Out loud you weakly said, “Straight away, Mrs. Hughes.” 

     You supposed it worked out for the best. As it turned out, Thomas had done something with the skirt you’d been mending—which just so happened to be needed by Lady Edith the next day—and it might give you a chance to see if he’d hidden it anywhere where he thought you would never go.

     You didn’t say any of this to Mrs. Hughes though, you just smiled and walked in the opposite direction.

     The male servant’s corridor was dark and you had trouble finding your way around without a lantern. You could make out the outlines of doorways, the doors all shut tight for the nighttime. 

     Now which door was the storage room? 

     You found it fairly quickly considering the circumstance and sorted through until you found the aforementioned dress. 

     Now, to reward yourself, you thought, a little snooping was in order.

     You walked farther down the hall to what you assumed were the bedrooms. 

     Again, the doors were all closed and most likely locked. You cursed under your breath. You were staring to head back before your eye caught on a glint of light spilling into the hallway from the far end of the corridor.

     You headed farther into the hall and you saw it. A door, propped open just enough to see that there was someone standing in it, their form outlined by the moonlight.

     You crept closer, peering through the gap.

     Thomas. His back was to you, but you could see him slowly inching closer to a bed on the far wall. 

     Except, he wasn’t alone. You could barely make out someone already sleeping. The room appeared to only have one bed, not a shared room, you thought.

     Which meant—

     You heard a cry. A rustle of blankets. You dared to open the door just a little bit more. 

     “What in the bloody hell—”

     You looked up in time to see Thomas leaning over Jimmy, a look of pure horror and shock on the latter’s face. Thomas backed up quickly, while Jimmy stood in outrage.

     “Did you just try to—” Jimmy’s surprise quickly turned to anger as he took a step towards the other man. 

     Your mind could hardly work fast enough, watching all of this unfold. You couldn’t believe what you were seeing. If this was what you thought it was—

     You weren’t paying attention and you leaned forwards, your foot stepping on a creaky board—curse this old house—and alerting both men. Thomas turned around and his eyes landed on yours.

     “Miss (Y/l/n), this isn’t what it looks like, alright? If you think I invited him, than you’re mistaken.” Jimmy looked flustered and you looked from him to Thomas.

     Thomas opened his mouth, as if to say something. He looked pained and miserable. 

     You almost forgot yourself and felt bad for him. 

     He tried to say something again but instead just looked from you to Jimmy and then rushed out of the room. 

     You couldn’t do anything but follow him. 

     “Mr. Barrow—”

     Abruptly, he stopped and turned around to face you. His posture was straight and he spoke as is if he were discussing the weather. 

     “You got what you wanted, didn’t you, Miss (Y/l/n)?”

     You didn’t respond.

     “I’m sure you’d just love to see me sacked, wouldn’t you?” Thomas bit out.

     “Now—”

     “Go on, tell Mr. Carson. Tell His Lordship. Tell the bloody King. Finally got an excuse to see the end of me. I reckon no one’ll even bat an eye, neither.”

     Even in the dark, could see the pain and loneliness and fear in his expression that he was trying to hide with his harsh words. 

     You’d imagined the moment Thomas Barrow would get thrown out on his ear many a time. You’d always pictured the way you’d smirk as he left Downton for the last time. How you’d shout ‘good riddance’ for all to hear. You’d conjured up a million different circumstances just like this.

     Except never like this. Not with Thomas weak, practically giving up. You couldn’t say it didn’t sound appealing, getting rid of him. You had the advantage. But suddenly, you didn’t want it. 

     “You must think more of me than that, Mr. Barrow.”

     “I don’t know what you mean,” his voice was rough. 

     “I mean, I better get back with this dress ‘fore they send a search party.”

     You started to walk past Thomas, but he stepped in front of you.

     “So, that’s it? No victory speech?” Thomas glared down at you.

     You had the urge to slap the look off his face but you took a deep breath.

     “Victory over what? I didn’t see nothing to make me victorious. And by that, I mean I didn’t see nothing at all.” 

     You winked at him once leaving him standing there to process that as you hurried back in the direction you came. 

     You nearly laughed at the turn of events as you found your way back in the dark. You, covering for Thomas Barrow. 

     Never in your wildest dreams…

₊˚ ✧ ‿︵‿୨୧‿︵‿ ✧ ₊˚

      The next day, Thomas could hardly look at you. Whenever he rounded a corner and found you on the other side, he stopped, looked like he wanted to speak to you, and then hurried on past. 

     You didn’t exactly expect him to bake you a cake or nothing, but you supposed a decent thank you was in order for saving his arse. 

     However, for all he wasn’t looking at you, he was looking at Jimmy. Except this time, instead of the look of friendship (or more, you supposed) it was now a look of apprehension. 

     Most likely afraid Jimmy would take his story himself to Mr. Carson. 

     And you didn’t see any reason why he wouldn’t. From the look of him, you thought as you sat across from him at the servants table, he looked ready to pounce. 

     Before you could stop yourself and advise against it, you walked up to him. “Jimmy, may I have a word?”

     You couldn’t have your one act of kindness ruined by any loose ends. 

     As Jimmy followed you into the boot room you felt O’Brien’s eyes on you and promptly ignored them. 

     You got straight to the point, “I wish to talk about what happened last night.”

     “I bloody don’t,” Jimmy responded, his eyes flashing, “it was awful, that’s what it was.”

     “It was a misunderstanding,” you supplied.

     The footman scoffed, “No, I think I understood perfectly alright.”

     “What I mean to say is, I hope you don’t plan to make this misunderstanding something bigger than it is.”

     “I have to tell the police, that’s what I have to do! I’ve been talking to Miss O’Brien and—”

     “And I hope you see how ill advised that would be,” you finished. 

     He raised an eyebrow at you. 

     “You wouldn’t want to seem like you were mixed up in…something of that nature.”

     “I don’t understand,” Jimmy said. 

     “You wouldn’t want anyone to think you’re in on anything disgusting, would you?”

     Personally, you didn’t find anything particularly disgusting about the whole situation. You figured Thomas could kiss whoever he liked, for all you cared as long as it wasn’t you. But you knew that wasn’t going to work with Jimmy. 

     “Well no but—”

     “Because if you go around spinning your story, someone down the line is bound to think you weren’t all against it, if you know what I’m getting at,” you said.

     A look of horror passed Jimmy’s face. 

     “And besides I don’t think you’re the kind of person who would want to get a man fired, are you?” 

     He paused. “Why do you care if I get Mr. Barrow sacked? You don’t seem to get on with him anyways.”

     “Oh, I don’t care what happens to Mr. Barrow,” you said with a smirk, “I just wouldn’t want this unfortunate incident to cause more of a quagmire for anyone than is necessary.”

     Jimmy nodded, “Well, I wouldn’t want anyone’s reputation ruined for it I suppose.”

     You smiled.

     “And by that, I can’t pretend I don’t mean my own,” he added.

     “Who knows,” you said, “you and Barrow might end up being friends eventually.”

     “Friends?” He sounded incredulous, “I doubt it.”

     “I think there’s more to Thomas than meets the eye,” you said cryptically. “Either way, think about what I said.”

     He looked at you a moment, pondering, before nodding at you and leaving the room quickly. 

     You breathed out a sigh. 

     “Well, that was quite the speech, Miss (Y/l/n).”

     You whirled around, finding Thomas standing in the doorway. How much of your conversation with Jimmy had he heard?

     “And what are you doing here, Mr. Barrow? I can’t say following Jimmy around like a lost puppy is well advised anymore.”

     Thomas clenched his teeth, looking at you. “It is a public place, isn’t it?”

     You were both silent for a moment, as you calculated what to say next. Mr. Barrow beat you to it. 

     “I wanted to say thank you,” it looked like it cause him pain to say the words to you, his sworn nemesis.

     “I would have been sacked if it weren’t for you, though I still can’t quite understand why you did it, and I thank you for it,” he finished. “I’m not sure I deserve it, but I’m grateful.”

     “Well, I can’t say it’s not entirely out of self interest,” you said, straightening, “seeing as I can’t torture you if you’re gone, I saw no reason to be the one to end that.”

     Thomas almost smiled. “That was quite an act of deception you pulled with Jimmy.”

     “Would you believe me if I said I learned from the best?”

     “Now, I’m not sure I deserve your compliments as well as your pity,” Thomas said.

     “Really, there’s no need to think yourself so special. I was speaking of Miss O’Brien.”

     Thomas let out a laugh and you couldn’t help but smile at him. He wasn’t all bad, you could see that. And you couldn’t imagine Downton without him now that you had been faced with the possibility.

     “Well, I hope you don’t expect us to be friendly now,” you warned, to break the silence and whatever the spell that had fallen over you two was that made you act most unlike yourselves. Sharing a companionable silence? Never!

     “I wouldn’t wish being your friend on my worst enemy, let alone take part in it myself.” Thomas brushed invisible lint off of his jacket. 

     You rolled your eyes at him, but it didn’t hold any real conviction.

     “Well, I suppose I ought to get on with my work,” you said, moving past Thomas. “Wouldn’t want to get behind on your account.”

     “You are a queer woman, aren’t you?” Thomas said not unkindly.

     “I could say the same to you.”

     You turned around, your tone more serious than it had just been 

     “And for what it’s worth, I don’t think you’re disgusting, Mr. Barrow.”

     Thomas was silent.

     “Horrid and self-serving and haughty and a pain in my rear end. But not disgusting.”

     “I could say the same to you,” Thomas echoed your earlier statement. 

     You left without another word. 

     You didn’t think that you and Thomas would be companions, exactly. But you left that room with a greater fondness for him that you’d ever felt. You understood him more, if nothing else.

     And you thought you could guess he felt a little of the same way too. 

₊˚ ✧ ‿︵‿୨୧‿︵‿ ✧ ₊˚

     The next morning, as you began your day by checking the work you’d left out the night before, you found a new lump of fabric atop the pile. 

     You picked it up and let the cloth fall through your fingers.

     It was the skirt you were working at from earlier this week. Barely recognizable, however. It was mended, certainly. The holes were fixed and the hem had been replaced. It looked brand new, better than anything you could have done.

     Thomas. 

     It must have been him. You found yourself smiling to yourself.

     “Well then, I suppose we’re even, Mr. Barrow, aren't we?” you mumbled.

     Except for the fact that him taking it in the first place had delayed you getting the skirt to Lady Edith by a day.  

     But you’d get him back somehow, you thought, smiling. 

     You always did.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~°~❦~°~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

ˋ°•*⁀➷ hope you enjoyed this babes!! check out my thomas barrow series if you want more of him and have a great day 💐🍓🩰

[whereianonymouslypostfics]

Silver Springs Part 8

Pairing: Wanda Maximoff x reader

Word count: ~14k

Summary: Wanda tries to leave her mob life behind to start a family with you

A/N: We’re getting closer to the end! Thanks to everyone who’s read and commented on this story! I honestly just wrote it because I wanted to read it, but I’m glad that y’all are enjoying it too. ❤️ 

Chapter Warnings: Adverse drug side effects, panic attacks, sexual content. 

The next morning Wanda finds herself waiting for Vision in Pietro’s office far earlier than she wanted to be. That said, she slept surprisingly well considering the conversation she’d had with her wife right before going to sleep. She was still uncertain about what they decided, but she doesn’t get much longer to think about it when she hears a knock on the door. 

“Come in.”

When Vision walks in Wanda can’t help but smile slightly. She stands up straighter before she rounds the desk to stand closer to him. She watches as he shuts the door behind him before shooting her a confused look. 

“Vision, thank you for coming so quickly.” 

He nods because honestly he’s more than happy to be of assistance whenever she needs him. He’s just a little confused about what’s going on. 

“Of course, Wanda. Steve said it was urgent?” 

She nods before gesturing to the seat in front of her, and she waits until he sits down before she sits on the desk behind her with a sigh. She crosses her legs and looks to Vision with a slightly bewildered look. 

“You’ll never guess what happened yesterday.” 

She begins to relay the tale of how you’d been targeted yesterday afternoon and how the man responsible was one of her employees. 

“When I talked to him, he claimed that someone had paid him to do it.” 

Wanda rolls her eyes as she acts like it’s the most ridiculous thing in the world. Vision’s just listening with a slightly dazed look on his face, but she continues to tell the story with a few new details. 

“He wouldn’t tell me who it was in the end before someone hit his kill switch.”

At this Vision frowned in confusion and he tilted his head to the side. “Kill switch?” 

Yeah, Wanda had been just as shocked when she’d found out about it this morning. She’d suspected it, but suspecting and having it confirmed were two very different things and she had not been prepared to deal with it. She nods before mentioning that he’d died suddenly during questioning and she’d been suspicious as to who did it. 

“Yeah it was a little ridiculous. I mean, someone goes to the trouble of planting this guy here only to kill him before he really does much? It doesn’t make a lot of sense.” 

Vision agreed it really didn’t make a lot of sense. Especially if the few key details that Wanda hasn’t mentioned yet were left out. He waits to see if she’ll bring them up, but she seems lost in thought so he speaks up to get her attention. 

“Did he tell you anything useful?”

Wanda sighs before she shakes her head watching as Vision waits for her response. He’s tense and he probably doesn’t even notice how he’s fidgeting in his seat, but Wanda ignores this for now. 

“Other than confirming he was hired by someone; no. I think he was mostly just trying to buy himself time. I-I mean he claimed ‘someone with an English accent’ hired him to ruin my life. How vague is that?”

Vision just stares at Wanda in disbelief as he tries to figure out what is going on. Wanda is smart, he knows that much, and the fact that he’d been called on this morning after almost being ratted out made him think he was sunk. He showed up though because it would have been incriminating not to, but he’d made a calculated risk. He just wasn’t sure if it had paid off yet. 

“That’s…so strange.” 

Wanda laughs and Vision is startled by the sound of it because he’s not sure when the last time he heard her laugh was. She smiles at him again as she nods in agreement and decides to get right to it. 

“It really is, it really is, but I figured I’d talk to you today to let you know that you’re probably on the right track with Strucker and Rumlow. Have you figured out anything else from your investigation?” 

Vision so far had only sent out a half dozen people on a wild goose chase. They were following Strucker, locating Rumlow who was in hiding and wouldn’t be found, as well as snooping around his territory to try and see what they can find out. So far nothing fruitful has been discovered and he’s not even really sure what to tell Wanda. 

“Unfortunately, no. Rumlow’s in hiding, and Strucker hasn’t done anything suspicious- other than the usual.” 

Wanda frowns at this before she sighs in defeat. She knows now that her trust in the man in front of her was misplaced, and she should have let him down a little easier all those years ago. She also should have asked him to find new employment, but it was too late for that now. She takes a deep breath before shaking her head in disappointment. 

“Okay, well I don’t really know what else to do at this point. We can only stay here for another week or so before Y/n loses her mind, so unless we figure out who it is –she’s just a sitting duck.” 

Wanda looks off out the window as she thinks about how stubborn you are and how this is most likely true. You won’t stay here for too long, not when you have work and you want to get back to your normal routine. Vision frowns as Wanda wipes her eyes and turns away from him with a sigh. 

“I’m sorry, you don’t have to sit here and listen to me fret. You can go Vision.” 

Wanda closes her eyes and takes a deep breath, trying to calm the panic that is raging inside her at the thought of you leaving here and getting hurt. She doesn’t realize Vision’s speaking until he’s standing right in front of her. She’s breathing hard as she feels her face start to heat up and her head spins as she starts to truly panic. She can’t lose you, or the life you are both building together. If she loses you and her baby, she’s not sure she’d be able to keep on living. 

“Wanda! You need to breathe; you’re having a panic attack.” 

She hears his voice, but it’s not until he turns her towards him that she snaps out of it. She starts slightly before looking away with an embarrassed look. 

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry. I’m just stressed I didn’t mean to dump all of this on you.” 

Wanda makes to stand up but she then realizes how close Vision is standing and she falls back against the desk. He shakes his head before coughing softly and taking a step back once he realizes. He drops his arms by his side as he offers the only reassurance he can.

“It’s alright, I’m here for whatever you need, Wanda.” 

She smiles gratefully before she rubs her eyes and tries to look less puny. She eventually turns back to face Vision and she lifts a hand to pat him on the shoulder.

“Thanks, Vis. That means a lot.” 

He just smiles at her and Wanda has to hold herself back from throttling him. Instead, she steps away and clears her throat with a blush. 

“Let me know if you find anything useful?”

He simply nods before excusing himself and leaving Wanda alone. She still looks worried, but he’s not sure what else he can do at the moment. He leaves and immediately heads back down to the garage. If he wants to maintain his cover, he has to keep working despite wanting to burn this entire empire to the ground. He has several other meetings today before he can figure out how to use what Wanda just told him to his advantage. 

If your home will be empty for the next week or so, he can figure out how to make his next move. He just needs to make a couple of calls first. 

He arrives to his car and starts it up before picking up his phone. He searches for a familiar number before calling it as he pulls out of his parking spot. It rings three times before the man on the other end answers. 

“Hello?” 

Vision sighs as he smiles slightly to himself. He doesn’t realize how relieved he is until he drives out into the sun. 

“Rumlow, it’s me. She doesn’t suspect a thing. I’ll be in contact soon about the next part of my plan.” 

Vision hears a grunt of acknowledgement on the other end of the line before he hangs up. Vision takes a deep breath and finally feels like he might be able to finally get what he wants. With you gone he might have a chance, and it’s that thought that keeps the smile on his face all the way into town. 

“Harder, Y/n! Come on don’t be such a pussy.” 

You get up from your kneeling position before you lunge at Yelena, but unfortunately, she was ready for you and blocked your hit once again. You groan in annoyance as you two keep throwing punches before she hits you in the shoulder. You’re at least grateful that it’s not your face, but you’re still mad enough to stomp on her foot and elbow her in the stomach. 

“Much better! Nat said you had a lot of energy to burn.”

You sigh at this before shrugging in disinterest. Yesterday was weird and you’re trying not to think about it too much as you sit down to take a break. You’ve been at this ever since Wanda left to talk to Vision and you’re honestly wondering if you have a problem. You could have chosen any other method for distracting yourself. You could have taken Boone for a walk, but honestly the idea of walking around the compound alone right now was a little intimidating. Maybe you should start carrying a weapon. 

“Did you hear me, Y/n?”

Your gaze snaps back to Yelena who’s crossing her arms and shooting you a disapproving look. Needless to say, you have no idea what she’s talking about, but instead of repeating herself she just sighs in defeat and sits next to you. 

“You’re worried.” 

It’s not a question because Yelena knows the answer. Still, you nod and rest your head in your hand with a nod. 

“I just don’t trust, Vision.” 

That was an understatement, but that was all you’re going to say now. You and Yelena met in the training rooms since that’s where the blonde was in between sessions. You found it easier than you thought to ignore the people around you, and not many of them were paying attention to you anyway. Unbeknownst to you, they’d all heard about what happened to Clark after he attacked you, so no one was risking looking at you funny, let alone at all. 

Yelena scoffs at this and just shakes her head at the thought of the older man. He’s always been a pain in the ass, and terribly obvious about his feelings for Wanda. The redhead just ignores them, but everyone can see how madly in love he is with her, it’s embarrassing. 

You stand up suddenly as something occurs to you, and you look back to Yelena with a determined expression. 

“Can you teach me how to disarm and flip someone who’s standing in front of me?” 

Wanda leaves Pietro’s office only a few minutes after Vision left. She texted Bucky to figure out where you are because she’s having him tail you until further notice. She’s not going to take any chances until she figures out Vision’s plan. When she gets the response that you’re downstairs with Yelena training she picks up the pace. She realizes you’re stressed from everything that’s going on, but that’s twice in twelve hours that you’ve trained with the sisters. You’re going to need to find better ways to destress as time goes on. She wasn’t going to let you work out much once you were showing. 

Wanda walks in to the training room that Bucky said you were in and immediately started searching for you. She ignored the stares she got as she waded through equipment and groups of people to where you and Yelena were standing facing each other. You were paying close attention to the blonde before nodding and holding out your hand with a slightly apprehensive look. 

Wanda didn’t have much time to predict what you two were doing before Yelena grabs your hand and yanks you forward before flipping you over her shoulder. You land on your back with a loud thud and you groan in pain as you squeeze your eyes shut. 

“Okay, cool, got it.” 

“Belova!” 

You and Yelena both turn at the sound of Wanda’s angry voice. She’s only a few feet away when you hold out your hand to Yelena to help you up. She grabs your hand and yanks you to your feet just in time for Wanda to reach you. You hold up your hands in surrender before you shoot her a smile that she just rolls her eyes at. 

“Hey, don’t get mad at her, Wands. I asked for it.” 

“She literally did.” 

Wanda didn’t care much for this detail and she still glared at Yelena as she looks you up and down. You’re dressed similarly to last night, but your outfit is not as revealing. You’re sweaty and she has to stop herself from reaching out to squeeze your biceps. Your voice cuts her thoughts off before they can fall too far into the gutter. 

“Are you okay? You look a little flushed.” 

Wanda frowns as she shakes her head without thinking. She’s glad to have confirmation that Vision is her rat and now she can tail him to see what he’s planning, but she’s not sure what you mean. 

“What do you mean?” 

You frown as you take a step towards your wife and reach out for her. You graze her cheek with the back of your hand before muttering under your breath. 

“You just look like you were crying. Did Vision do something to upset you?” 

You swear, if he did, you’d find him and punch him in the face. You watch as Wanda just shakes her head again before waving you off. 

“Oh no, it’s fine. I’ll tell you about it later.”

Later came in about ten minutes when you and Wanda walked back to your rooms. Yelena had to teach so you were now free to catch up with your wife. You greet Boone as he nearly jumps out of the door in excitement to greet you. You’d left him here because he wasn’t allowed in the training rooms and since he’d had a busy day yesterday you wanted him to take it easy. You smile at him before turning to your wife who is halfway to the kitchen already. 

“So how did it go?” 

Wanda sighs before she opens the fridge and grabs the pitcher of water before setting it on the counter. She walks over to the cabinet to grab a glass before she shakes her head at you. 

“It went as expected honestly. He’s a lousy liar, but I think he underestimated me enough to buy that I didn’t believe a word that Clark said.” 

You’re not sure how to reply to this immediately and you just watch as Wanda drinks nearly a whole glass of water in one go. You walk around the counter to reach out for her, but she takes a step back and shakes her head again. 

“You think he’s stupid enough to underestimate you?” 

Wanda had thought about this a lot, and despite how insulting it was she believed it to be true. Vision had known her for years, seen how she’d transformed her parents’ legacy and turned it into a lucrative, well-oiled machine. Yet despite his respect for her business smarts, he’s foolish, or sexist enough to doubt her judgment when you’re involved, when emotions are involved - to the point that he thinks that he’s in the clear. To think that Clark didn’t incriminate him yesterday, and his poor contrite performance this morning didn’t dig his own grave deeper makes Wanda furious. 

The fact that this man claims to love her makes it even worse. Could someone who claims to love her truly think so little of her? 

“Yes. He truly is. He’s stupid enough to believe that I am so clouded by my desperation to keep you safe that I can’t see what’s right in front of me!” 

You reach out quickly to grab the glass that Wanda’s abandoned mere seconds before she throws her arm out haphazardly striking out at the closest thing to her. You set it aside before you try again to comfort your wife, but she’s too angry to focus on you right now. She’s breathing heavily and looking for something else to hit when you grab her hips and wrap your arms around her waist to stop her. 

“Then my fake panic attack turned into a real one, and I had to thank him for pulling me out of it instead of slapping him for causing it.” 

This reminds you of what you first noticed when Wanda showed up to the training room to find you. She looked flushed, and a little frazzled but you couldn’t put a finger to it. Seeing her lose her temper now and admit to panicking earlier makes it easier for you to see that your wife is overwhelmed. She’s somehow even more worried than she was before she had no idea who was behind all of this, and you know you need to do something about it. You’ve just been letting her take care of it because that was her forte. 

However, you’re beginning to realize that this isn’t fair to her. She shouldn’t have to shoulder this entire burden, and it’s time for you to start doing your part. You feel her breathing rapidly against you and you pull her closer to try and get her attention. 

“Hey, Wanda, I need you to take a breath, okay? Breathe with me.” 

You take a deep breath as one of your hands moves to your wife’s stomach. You wait until she’s able to match your slow breathing for a few counts before you kiss her cheek. 

“I hate that you’re feeling the brunt of this, Wands. What can I do to help you? I’ll do anything.” 

When Wanda doesn’t respond immediately, but just holds your hand against her stomach you start to ramble. You realize as you start speaking that you are 100% willing to do all of this despite your initial reluctance. There’s more on the line now, and you want your family safe above all. 

“I’ll start carrying a gun, I can train more or less if you want, I’ll even take time off of work if you want me to.”

You wait for a few agonizing seconds before Wanda takes a deep breath and shakes her head. She turns slightly so she can meet your gaze when she speaks.

“Can you—can you just hold me for a while. Please?”

As long as you have known her, you’ve always struggled to say no to your wife. You hardly ever wanted to, but even when you did you were a giant pushover for her. You just adored her and wanted to give her the world. 

You nod in response before you kiss her again and hold her tighter. “Anything you want, love.”

The rest of the weekend flies by. Both you and Wanda keep busy, but you’re mostly doing your own things as you try your best to prepare for going back to work. You and Wanda had talked about it for a long time before finally deciding that you should go back to work at least for the time being. That said, Wanda had made you agree to take a few extra precautions until Vision’s plan became more obvious.

You would take Boone with you every day. This wasn’t that different from usual, but this weekend you and Bucky had been working with him and refreshing his bite training. You hated to do it, but you did want him to be prepared. He was very good at it and really enjoyed it so you felt a little better about it for that reason at least. His commands were simple and despite wearing a lot of padding, Bucky’s arm was sore by the end of the weekend.

You were also going to start carrying a gun around. You’d spent time with Nat and Yelena this weekend in the shooting range and you were honestly so sick of it already. You hadn’t been a bad shot before, but you forgot how difficult it was to shoot at something that was moving, and when the lighting was less than ideal. Since the first time someone had approached you was at night, you’d practiced shooting in the dark and that honestly was a challenge you hadn’t anticipated ever overcoming. 

Lastly, Bucky was going to be closer by than usual and the two of you would be constant contact via coms that were muted when they weren’t in use. You’d never mute yours though unless you absolutely had to and you were now packing your own lunch. In addition to this, when he had time, Bucky was training with you as well. He figured it might be more realistic because if Vision or another man tried to attack you, it would look less like what Nat and Yelena were taught and more like Bucky. 

Wanda was busy as well but most of her preparation was with her brother, Nat, and Tony. Tony owns a lot of the businesses that Wanda and Pietro work with, and he’s agreed to put eyes on Vision in a way that he won’t be able to pick up on. The hope is if they can find a way to keep Vision accountable for what he does throughout the day, they can see him slip. 

Unfortunately, part of this plan involves Wanda talking to him more frequently which she not only loathes, but honestly fears might tip him off. She decides to start actually taking his phone calls and going from there to maybe one meeting a week to touch base about his investigation as to not rouse any suspicion. Having closer tabs on him though would make it easier to track what he was doing and hopefully who he was talking to. 

Wanda didn’t want to change too much too soon however, and Pietro couldn’t understand why. They’d brought up tracking his car and his phone, but that was too much in Wanda’s opinion. If he picked up on this he could realize that he’d been found out and disappear, or worse move up his time table. Pietro had argued that if he did, they’d know about it and be able to stop him, but Wanda didn’t want to take that risk. She wanted to be strategic and as prepared as possible for when he did strike.

You check your bag one last time before heading downstairs to the garage to leave for work. Once you confirm that you have your phone, keys, and gun tucked away you grab Boone’s leash and head to the elevators. Wanda was already in a meeting with Kate about something that you can’t remember so you just wave goodbye to Fletcher before leaving. 

You’re in the elevator bouncing on the balls of your feet impatiently when you phone beeps. You remember that you need to turn on your coms and you press a couple buttons on your phone before you speak quietly. 

“Bucky, you there?” 

The older man responds almost immediately and you just nod before preparing to step out of the elevator when it signals your arrival to the garage. 

“All clear. I’m on my way down.” 

When the elevator doors open, you’re surprised to see Vision standing there looking at his phone with his hand on the button. He looks up at you and you both just smile tightly as you and Boone exit the elevator. You move Boone away before he can growl or otherwise show his distaste for the man in front of you, and you just nod at him before heading to your car. 

“Vision.” 

“Y/n, hello.”

You are about to leave when you hear Bucky speak up and ask if Vision is with you. You don’t respond because he obviously is still paying attention to you, and he speaks up before you can get out of earshot. 

“I hope everything is calming down for you since last week.” 

You almost smile at this but you stop yourself as you nod slowly at the thought of what Vision’s talking about. You rely on your best poker face to keep from showing your true feelings as stop in your tracks. 

“It is, yeah. It’ll be nice to get back to work –and home eventually, but one step at a time, right?” 

You offer a weak smile as Vision just nods and continues to hold open the elevator. You don’t realize that this is keeping Bucky from coming down immediately, and you don’t panic because you figure Vision won’t shoot you here, in the middle of the garage that has multiple cameras. 

“Getting back to a routine is good. The best way to get over the weirdness, I’m sure.”

You can’t help but laugh at this because not only is this exceedingly weird, but you haven’t had a conversation this long with Vision in you can’t remember how long. Usually you exchange meaningless platitudes and a couple of subtle barbs before going on your way. You never have a reason to be with him by yourself and you realize that you like this a lot better. 

“That’s one way to put it I guess.” 

He smiles before moving out of the way for a couple of people that head toward the elevator. You watch as they get in and the doors close behind him before Vision speaks up with a sigh and a shake of his head. 

“Hopefully Wanda doesn’t have to resort to such unconventional methods again to get someone to talk.”

Bucky tells you that he’s almost to the garage, but you don’t hear him as you shoot Vision a confused look. You’re not sure what he’s talking about because you both know what lengths your wife might have to go to during an interrogation and you’ve made your peace with that. Hell, you dressed her for the part and sent her on her way, so you definitely aren’t ignorant to the bloodshed that might occur. You know Vision isn’t either since he’s been working for your wife for nearly a decade. He’s never been directly involved because that wasn’t his job, but that doesn’t mean he didn’t see some carnage here and there. 

“I didn’t figure you as the squeamish type, Vision. Haven’t you seen your fair share of blood?”

Vision frowns in confusion before your words seem to set in and he looks a little caught off guard. He shakes his head before turning his attention back to his phone once it beeps. 

“I certainly have, but that’s not what I’m talking about.”

You barely register Boone sitting down with an impatient whine as your brows furrow in confusion. It’s too early and you’ve only had one cup of coffee, so you’re not prepared for Vision’s riddles this morning. You sigh in annoyance before shooting the blonde who’s just looked up from his phone again an uncertain look. 

“What are you talking about, Vision?” 

His frown deepens as he presses the button for the elevator again absentmindedly. 

“Has she not told you about this? I don’t think it’s really my place to do so.”

If you didn’t already hate Vision, you certainly would at this point for needlessly dragging this out. You’re certain he’s just talking about some of the more gruesome things Wanda might do, but then again those usually involve blood. You don’t realize how lost you are until you hear Vision cough before clearing his throat. 

“I’m sorry, Y/n, I thought you knew.” 

You can’t help but lose your patience and you ask between clenched teeth for Vision to get to the damn point. 

“What don’t I know?” 

You don’t realize the elevator is here until the ding catches you attention, but at this point you’re going to follow Vision if you must to get an answer from him. He’s purposely baiting you and it’s driving you nuts. 

He places his phone in his pocket before turning back toward you and Boone who’s becoming even more unsettled by your side. He can sense your distress and he’s confused as to why you’re still talking to someone you clearly dislike. To someone he was trained to bite this weekend. 

Vision holds an arm out to keep the elevator from closing before stepping inside and shooting you a smirk. 

“Sometimes Wanda has to appeal to men’s baser desires to get answers. Clark being one of them.” 

Before you can even register what he’s said, Vision’s phone rings and he’s answering it as the doors close between you. You don’t notice Bucky coming out of the stairwell behind you until you nearly run into him. 

“Wanda, hello.” 

You’re not sure if you’re screaming or if you’re just imagining it. You really wish you’d reacted faster so you could punch Vision in the face for being so lewd, so…wrong. You can’t even begin to wrap your brain around what Vision said to you, what it could mean right now. You refuse to believe that your wife would ever do something like that. He just has to be messing with you, right? There’s no way…

“Y/n?” 

You turn around to head to your car only to see Bucky not a foot away from you. You jump in surprise before trying to shake your daze as you continue to walk to your car. 

“Wait, what did Vision want? What happened?” 

You just shake your head because you can’t talk about it right now. You’re still trying to force the image of Wanda doing anything like that with anyone out of your mind. She’s never mentioned resorting to anything like that, but then again she’s never told you the protocol because you’ve never asked. There were a lot of elements of Wanda’s job that you didn’t get details on and you were fine with this for the most part. It was for your peace of mind as well as hers, but you’re just now realizing that with all of these gaps in your knowledge, Wanda could do anything she wanted without you ever knowing. 

“Nothing, he was just being a dick.”

You don’t elaborate and Bucky realizes that you’re not going to right now so he just makes a note to ask you again later. He gets in his own car as you put Boone in your backseat before opening the driver’s side door. You start out of the garage and pull onto the road before you start having the intrusive thoughts again. You imagine Wanda sleeping with these nameless, faceless men, and then Clark and you find yourself gripping the steering wheel so hard your hands hurt. You squeeze your eyes shut as you shake your head. There’s no way Wanda would do something like that without telling you, right?

You’re halfway to work before you cave and speak into your coms. 

“Bucky?” 

There’s a brief period of silence before he responds. “What’s up?” 

You don’t ask immediately because you’re not sure how to without implying that there’s something wrong, or that you don’t trust Wanda. That’s not the issue. The issue is Vision being a manipulative shit that continues to make you doubt your worth like he has for years. 

“Do you---does anyone stand in the room with Wands when she interrogates people?” 

The length of silence that you’re met with makes you worry that you didn’t ask your question well. Bucky is trying to figure out why you’re suddenly curious and what Vision could have possibly said to you. Eventually he just shakes his head before answering honestly. He really wishes this conversation was face to face because he’s sure it would have been more telling than this. 

“Not usually. Someone’s on standby though if she needs us.” 

You take a deep breath before you bite your tongue to keep from crying. You sit up in your seat and start driving a little faster as you respond through clenched teeth. 

“Okay, thanks.”

Wanda hadn’t been expecting a visit from Vision today. He’d said he would update her mid-week, but the fact he’s here now is a little confusing to her. She doesn’t ask too many questions though, and she just tries to wait patiently for him to show up. 

Pietro was using his office, so Wanda’s set up shop in one down the hall that has been recently vacated. She’s not here much honestly but she needs some place to go that doesn’t displace her brother. She’s glancing out the window wondering if it’s going to rain today when there’s a knock on the door. She turns and isn’t surprised to see Vision there, but she hadn’t expected him to look so uneasy. 

“Vision, what’s wrong?”

He walks into the room and shakes his head before he sits down. He organizes the papers in his lap needlessly before shooting the redhead a faux concerned look. 

“I was just coming up in the elevator and I ran into Y/n. She seemed upset about something but was in her car before I could even ask.” 

Wanda has to remind herself that Vision could be lying. You didn’t call her to tell her about anything happening so maybe it wasn’t true. Maybe the two of you just had another awkward, barely civil interaction. She made a mental note to call you later, but for now she appeared appropriately concerned.

“Really? She didn’t mention anything. I’ll call her after this.”

Vision just nods before muttering something about that being a good idea before he looks to Wanda with a frown. 

“I’m actually meeting with Pietro soon for a routine check in, but I did want to stop by and see if you were feeling any better.”

Wanda’s surprised by this and she doesn’t bother hiding it. She had assumed that Vision had ‘news’ about Rumlow or Strucker, but she supposed this was wishful thinking. It had only been a couple of days since they last talked after all. She smiles slightly before shifting in her seat and nodding. 

“I am, thank you. This weekend was just tough.” 

Wanda was telling the truth. The amount the two of you were able to get done this weekend made her feel a little better about being on the offensive. You spent a lot of your time with Yelena, Nat and Bucky while she talked with her brother and Nat about figuring out how to tail the man in front of her. She smiles again as he stands up preparing to leave with a nod. He’s smiling and it takes a lot of her self-control to not glare at him. 

“I’m glad to hear it. I’ll be around again when I have news.” 

Wanda nods and watches as Vision leaves and shuts the door before she’s reaching for her phone. She’s not certain that she believes what Vision said about you, but it wouldn’t hurt to check in. She’s calling you and waiting for you to pick up for what seems like forever. By the fifth ring it goes to voicemail and Wanda decides to just call back later. You’re probably just getting started at work and won’t be available to talk anyway. She sighs as she tries to figure out what to do with the rest of her day. 

You manage to make it through most of the workday without thinking about your conversation with Vision this morning. It’s not until you find yourself waiting for your last appointment that you have to wander around the hospital to distract yourself from your thoughts. You’ve finished all of your records, call backs and prescription requests so you have nothing left to do until your last patient shows. 

You find a couple of assistants in the back getting blood on a cat, so you just leave them to it and go visit Boone. He’s hanging out in the runs and he was lying down when you check on him. You decide to leave him be because you don’t have much time to spare. You take your phone out and see that Wanda called you again. You figure she’s checking in, but you really can’t talk to her right now. You won’t be able to without mentioning what Vision said, and you don’t want to have this conversation over the phone. 

If she’s truly worried about you she’ll reach out to Bucky, but for now you’re just going to wait. When your appointment arrives, you are quick to jump into it, grateful for the distraction, but it doesn’t last nearly long enough. You’re out and back by yourself in no time, but at least you’re able to leave soon.

You make a trip back to the treatment area to look for the assistant you’d been working with to let her know you were heading out soon. As you walk back there you see a plate of cookies on the table where food that’s up for grabs usually lived. You had a weakness for sweets and couldn’t help but take one and start to eat it absentmindedly. You continue your search through the hospital for your assistant, and as you turn a corner, you are close to running into her as she comes out of the bathroom. 

“Oh sorry, Hayley. I was just about to head out---. What’s wrong?” 

You stop short when you realize the blonde is staring at you wide-eyed in concern. She’s looking between you and the cookie and you feel your face grow hot when you realize you might have done something wrong. 

“What’s wrong, was I not supposed to eat this? It was on the table and I thought--.” 

Hayley’s shaking her head before she takes a step around you and looks around for something. 

“Uh no it’s fine! But uh- Tyler made those with CBD.” 

You don’t say anything immediately because you hope that she’s going to say psych or something like that. When she doesn’t you just let out a humorless laugh before nodding in understanding. Of course this would happen to you. Of course it would. You nod again before trying to figure out what to do, but you honestly just need to get out of here. You don’t want to be stuck at work when the side effects, if any hit you. 

“Oh. Well, I should probably get home then. Goodnight.” 

The assistant just nods and offers an apologetic look before you hurry upstairs to grab your things. You grab Boone and head to your car before you start talking. 

“Did you hear any of that Bucky?” 

The older man tells you that he couldn’t really hear much over the dogs barking in the background and you just laugh before nodding and getting in your car. Boone’s buckled up in the backseat and you start the car with a sense of urgency. 

“Okay, well apparently I just ate a cookie with CBD in it, so I’m going to speed home a little.” 

Bucky’s eyes widen and he quickly starts his car to follow you out of the parking lot. You wait until you know he can follow you before turning onto the road and taking off. You sigh in annoyance as you think about how this is not how you wanted tonight to go. Not in the slightest. 

“Shit, seriously? Who brings that to work.” 

You shake your head because you’re not sure honestly. You’ll address it tomorrow once you’re in a better frame of mind, but right now you’re worried about getting back before the side effects hit. You are just going to have to sleep it off or something, and save the difficult conversation with Wanda for tomorrow. 

“I don’t know, and I don’t know how much was in it. But I need you to do me a favor, Buck.”

He just waits for you to say it even though he has a good idea of what you’re going to say. You merge onto the highway and hit 75 in record time before you respond. It’s usually a 40-minute drive, and you’re trying to cut it down as much as possible. 

“Don’t tell Wanda until we’re almost there, and if I’m really out of it, don’t let her talk to me.” 

You can tell by Bucky’s silence that he takes issue with something, if not both of the things that you say. You’re tapping your foot nervously as you try to find a balance between getting home quickly and not getting a speeding ticket. 

“I can do the first one I guess, but why don’t you want Wanda to talk to you?” 

You sigh as you realize that you’re going to have to give him a reason. You have to tell him about what Vision said despite not wanting to think about it. If you do end up so high you can barely think, you’re going to want someone to be able to explain your reluctance to be alone with your wife. You groan under your breath before you tighten your grip on the steering wheel. 

“I’m afraid she’ll ask about what Vision told me this morning, and I can’t talk about it high. I just--.” 

You trail off and move one lane over to try and go a little faster. You’re lucky Steve isn’t the one tailing you because he would be reluctant to drive this quickly, regardless of the circumstances. You nearly forget to respond to Bucky as you focus on the number of miles you have to drive, but he reminds you and you realize you can’t stall much longer. 

“Just…” 

You take a deep breath before you just come out and say it. 

“Vision told me that Wands sometimes has sex with the people she interrogates.” 

Bucky’s jaw drops as he tries to figure out why the hell Vision would tell you such bull. He’s shaking his head and stepping on the gas as he continues to follow you. 

“That’s bullshit, Y/n. She’s never done anything close to that.” 

You don’t respond immediately, but you close your eyes briefly as you sigh silently in relief. Hearing Bucky say this definitely makes you feel better. Despite not believing it, you are glad that Bucky didn’t hesitate to call Vision out. So now you have to deal with Vision being a lying asshole who’s clearly trying to manipulate you again. You hadn’t told anyone but Nat and Yelena about how Vision made you feel early on during your relationship with Wanda. After she’d introduced you to the family. Vision had found out about you and he’d been deadest against your relationship. This part hadn’t been a secret, just the fact that he often found you and left you feeling insecure with snide remarks about Wanda’s standards and how you didn’t fit into her life. You tried not to believe him but after a while it started to wear on you and you’d ending up breaking down and crying to Nat one night. You’d been drinking and hadn’t wanted to go home to Wanda, so you’d turned to Nat and she’d been living with Yelena and well it had all come out. You’d told them how Vision treated you like trash and made you feel even worse.

They were such good friends and they reassured you that he was just jealous and insecure and that you and Wanda were great together. They told you that Wanda loved you and nearly everything about you. You’d sworn them to secrecy that night, asking them not to tell anyone, especially Wanda about how Vision ridiculed you.

That was over a decade ago, and despite being more secure in your relationship and having more faith in yourself, sometimes you’d hear his voice mocking you. 

“I promise you she doesn’t, Y/n. Someone’s always listening in and we’d definitely know.”

You don’t realize you’re crying until you can’t see the road and you almost miss the exit. You curse under your breath before turning sharply and wiping your eyes at the same time. You must be feeling the effects now because you feel hyperaware of your surroundings and feel a little bit like you’re floating. 

“Not to mention she loves you and would never do that to you.”

 You’re crying harder now as you nod and wait for the light to change so you can hurry and get back. Bucky’s getting a little more concerned about you, but he doesn’t have time to ask how you’re feeling before you speak up. 

“I know she wouldn’t. I knew it was bullshit, but he’s just always so—God he always does this to me.” 

Bucky doesn’t get a chance to ask what you mean by that before his phone rings and he sees it’s Wanda. You’d ignored her calls all day and she wanted to make sure you were okay. Bucky tells you that she’s calling and you groan in annoyance before making the turn and heading down the road. Only about 10 more miles before you’re home. 

“Go ahead and answer it. Tell her what happened, but don’t mention Vision, please, Bucky.”

He doesn’t want to leave you without a way to talk to him but he knows that if he doesn’t answer Wanda will get nervous. So, he promises to be right back before cutting communication with you and answering his phone. 

“Hey, Wanda.” 

“Hi Bucky. Are you two on your way home yet?”

Bucky tightens his grip on the steering wheel before near flooring it to keep up with you. He’s not looking forward to any of this, but he promised to have your back so he’s just going to deal with it. 

“Yeah, we are, and uh Wanda, Y/n’s a little high.” 

Wanda stops what she’s doing when Bucky says this and Fletcher takes this as an invitation to jump up on the counter and explore. She’d been cooking dinner for you and was nearly done when she decided to call in and see how long you’d be. You didn’t answer for the fourth time today, so she’d called Bucky. She had not been expecting him to say this though. 

“She’s what?” 

Wanda was pissed before Bucky even started to explain. He said that you’d eaten a cookie right before leaving without knowing that it had CBD in it, and Wanda just groans under her breath. She’s only seen you on CBD once and it was bad. Way worse than you being on pot. The high is different, near hallucinogenic and you hated how trippy it made you feel. You had a panic attack last time before vomiting and falling asleep. 

“Jesus, okay, is she—is she driving home??” 

Bucky knew she was going to ask this, so he’s grateful that he can tell Wanda that they’re almost there. Wanda doesn’t hesitate to turn off the stove and cover dinner so Fletcher can’t get to it before she grabs some shoes and heads downstairs. 

“I’ll meet you downstairs.” 

Wanda’s about to hang up, but Bucky speaks up before she gets the chance. She’s opening the door and stepping outside when the brunette mentions what you’d just told him. 

“Wanda, wait. There’s one more thing.” 

When you arrive to the compound, you’re surprised you’re able to park you’re so out of it. You feel your head spin as you move to get out of the car. You groan as you hold yourself up against the car, not even able to open the door to get Boone out. 

“Here, let me help.” 

You assume it’s Bucky but you can’t be sure as you just nod and close your eyes. You hear the door slam though and you jump before you shake your head and try to clear your mind enough to walk to the elevator. You walk slowly, like you’re unsure of where your feet are and you almost trip over Boone. 

“Shit.” 

“Hold on, Y/n. Wanda’s on her way.” 

You stiffen at this and shoot him a confused look that he just returns when you walk ahead of him for the elevator. You seem totally fine until you run into the wall and can’t hit the buttons to save your life. Bucky curses as he and Boone run after you and he steadies you as you walk in and take a deep breath. You feel just like you felt last time you’d taken CBD. Your heartbeat was so loud and you felt your chest constricting as you fought to keep your eyes focused on anything.

You take deep breaths as you double over and put your hands on your knees to try and focus. You don’t hear Boone whining as he nudges you with his nose, you’re too focused on breathing in and out. You need to remind yourself that you can breathe and that the tightness is just the drug, it’s all in your head. 

“Bucky?” 

The brunette reaches out for you as the elevator doors open just in case you vomit, fall or God forbid try to run out on your own. 

“Yeah?” 

As soon as he asks this he looks up and sees Wanda waiting on the other side. She looks to you first and her expression becomes concerned when she takes in your appearance. You attempt to stand up straight when Bucky’s hand lands on your shoulder, and you look to him before speaking. 

“Don’t let me tell Wanda about it okay? I can’t—not right now, I’ll say something I regret.” 

Speaking of regret, as soon as you turn to head out the doors you see someone who looks remarkably like your wife. She’s frowning at you and wondering what exactly you’re talking about. Despite getting a rundown from Bucky about what Vision had told you this morning, she’s not sure what your take on it was and she supposes you could be mad at her. She hadn’t anticipated this though so she’s a little lost for words when she watches you realize that you recognize her. 

“Oh. Wanda.” 

Wanda decides not to worry about what you just said right now. She has more important things to worry about. Her priority was getting you safely upstairs and she reaches out for you before leading you off the elevator. 

“Come here, detka. Let’s get you upstairs.” 

You don’t say anything, only nod and you hold onto your wife for dear life. You figure that she must have heard what you said and that it was useless to try and delay this conversation. You just had to believe that Bucky told her how you felt about it and she knew you weren’t mad. At least not at her. 

“Thanks, Wands. I’m sorry for this. I didn’t think. It was a cookie and who brings CBD cookies to work…I mean I know it’s legal, but at least label it, I mean—woah.” 

You and Wanda had almost forgotten about how you ramble when you’re high and you can go from totally fine to insanely nauseous at the drop of a hat. You stumble into the second elevator and feel yourself sway as it starts to move. Wanda holds onto you by your waist as she tries to keep you quiet. 

“It’s okay, Y/n. It’s not your fault. I’m just glad you’re here now.” 

You nod in agreement before you rest your head on your wife’s shoulder. You’re tired and closing your eyes stops the world from spinning which makes you feel much better. You still hear your loud pulse in your ears and it makes you worried that it’s too fast. You’re taking short rapid breaths by the time you arrive to your rooms and Wanda realizes what the sequalae to this is and quickly gets you inside. 

“Bucky can you get some water please?” 

He nods before he sets your things by the door and hurries to the kitchen. Boone looks between you and Bucky not sure of where to go, but he decides to walk up to you and check on you. You’re sitting down with your hands on your knees as you force yourself to breathe calmly. You close your eyes when the floor starts to move beneath you and your breathing quickens.

“Y/n, it’s okay. You can breathe detka. Just pay attention to me, okay? Don’t listen to it.” 

Bucky’s a little confused but you understand what Wanda’s trying to do. She’s distracting you from listening to your racing pulse, and forcing you to focus on getting air. Wanda has a hand on your back and right above your heart to try and ground you. You squeeze your eyes shut as you try to focus on this and the furry head between your legs. 

“B-Boone, hey.” 

He whines at you before pushing his head further into you. You take a deep shuddering breath before holding him to you in a hug. He obediently stays pressed against your stomach while Bucky hands Wanda the water. She thanks him before turning to you and holding it out to you. 

“You need to drink something, Y/n. Can you try?” 

You nod despite not knowing if you can do it. You’ll try to do anything that Wanda asks of you and you look up before reaching out for the glass with a shaky hand. Your wife just shakes her head before holding it up for you. 

“Here, let me, okay?” 

You nod and just wait until you feel the glass against your lips. You manage to drink some before you jerk your head away as you heart beats particularly fast for a few seconds and you cringe. Water spills on Boone and he looks up but doesn’t pull away from you. You let him go to put a hand to your chest and Wanda sets down the water so she can reach out for you. 

“Should I call a doctor?” 

Wanda shakes her head because she’s certain that once she can get you to calm down, you’ll feel much better. She just has to get over that hurdle first, and Bucky just watches as she takes your hands and brings them to her shoulders. 

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry I didn’t mean to.” 

You start apologizing and Wanda just shakes her head not that you can follow it. You start to breathe raggedly and can feel your anxiety increase with each breath you take. Wanda smiles at you before she takes a deep breath. She exaggerates her movements so you can feel her take each breath and you try to focus on this instead of your own body. 

“It’s okay. It’s not your fault. Can you follow my breathing? Breathe with me, in and out.”

You take a few seconds to follow what Wanda says, but eventually you manage to follow her movements and her words. In and out. In and out. You continue to breathe feeling your lungs expand and your chest loosen ever so slightly. You glance down to see that Boone is still lying against you watching you carefully. If you weren’t terrified of taking your hands off your wife you would pull him up into your lap and kiss him. 

“I’m sorry, Wands. I-I know better than to believe anything Vision says.” 

Wanda smiles sadly when she realizes what you’re talking about and she releases your hands once she knows that you’ll keep them on her shoulders before reaching out for you. She cups your face before she kisses your forehead. You close your eyes and sigh heavily before you continue to breathe, in and out. In and out. 

“I’m sorry he said that to you. If I had known earlier, I would have punched him in the face this morning.” 

You can’t help but laugh slightly at this and the sound makes Wanda smile wider. She runs her fingers along your chin to wipe away the spilt water before she leans in and kisses you. 

“The idea of doing that with anyone other than you is unfathomable. I hope you know that.” 

You nod and you can feel tears starting to fill your eyes and your breathing starts to stutter again. You drop a hand from your wife’s shoulder and reach down to pet Boone who immediately licks your hand in return. You smile and try to focus on your two favorite beings in your arms. 

“I know- I know. I just—he’s always done this—I let him manipulate me again.” 

You are paying attention to Boone in your lap, so you miss the look that Wanda shoots Bucky when you say this. They both are a little confused by what you’re talking about, but now is not the time to ask about it. Wanda just needs to get you to bed and maybe get you to drink a little more.

“We’ll talk about that later. For now, do you think you can make it to bed.”

You don’t answer immediately because you’re not sure, and you also want Wanda to go with you. You don’t want to be alone right now. You don’t realize that you say this out loud though until Wanda takes both of your hands and smiles at you reassuringly. 

“I’ll stay with you, okay? Let’s give it a shot.” 

You just nod before you start to stand up. Boone is quick to get out of the way, and you hold onto Wanda’s hands as you stumble slightly but find your footing quickly and start for the bedroom with a sigh. 

“Okay new rule. My food only.” 

Wanda and Bucky can’t help but laugh at this and Wanda nods in agreement as she follows Boone’s lead into the bedroom. She tells you that sounds like a good idea before she leads you to the bed. When you sit down you see Boone in front of you and you try to jump back up to your feet. Wanda stops you quickly before shooting you a questioning look. 

“Boone! I need to feed him and walk him and then--.” 

Wanda shakes her head and Bucky speaks up quickly. He has a feeling you just need to get changed and go to sleep for a while, so he doesn’t need to stick around for that. He can help in another way though, and he’s already walking towards Boone when Wanda turns to him. 

“I can do that, Y/n. Just rest up, okay?”

You turn to Bucky and your eyes widen slightly. You had forgotten that he was there and you feel a little bad about it. You shoot him a grateful smile before turning slightly so you can lie down. 

“Thank you, Buck. And thanks for not listening to me.” 

Bucky smiles before nodding in response and grabbing Boone’s leash. He gets the idea and he jumps excitedly as Bucky leads him out of the bedroom, the door closing gently behind him.

“Not a problem, kid.” 

You’re about to close your eyes and roll over when Wanda speaks up. She reminds you that you’re still in your work clothes and you would be more comfortable if you changed into something else. You sigh and nod before sitting back up and making to get up. 

“Sit, dekta, I’ll find something for you.” 

You just nod in agreement because you’re too tired to really argue. You just stare at the ground while you wait for Wanda to grab you a change of clothes. Your stomach growls loudly and you look down at it in confusion before you realize that it must be late and you’re probably hungry. Wanda reaches this same conclusion and once she’s brought you clothes, she decides she’ll get you some food. 

“Let’s get you changed then I’ll grab you something to eat.” 

You don’t respond because you’re struggling to get your shirt off and you eventually just give up with a groan. Wanda grabs it and pulls it over your head before trying to put the new one on, but you’re standing up to take off your pants before she gets the chance. She sighs in defeat but just goes with it and helps you balance while you change your pants. She hands you the shirt and you get it on most of the way by yourself before you collapse back onto the bed. 

“I’ll go grab your food, okay? I’ll be right back.” 

You don’t realize you’ve started to shiver before you shake your head and try to speak. You’re suddenly cold but feverish and you realize that you’re onto the next phase of feeling like crap. Less breathing issues, but more annoying thermoregulation issues. 

“W-wait, can you…can you stay with me instead. Please?” 

Similar to how you have issues saying no to Wanda, she has an equally difficult time saying no to you. When you’re being reckless with Yelena, or you want her to watch a horror movie with you she finds it easy to put her foot down. However, whenever you’re asking for her attention, or simply her company she can never refuse you. So she nods easily as she takes off her shoes and jacket before lying down next to you. She grabs the blanket at the foot of the bed and throws it over both of you before she moves closer to you. You immediately reach out for her and hold her close despite your shivering. 

“T-thank you, Wands.” 

She just smiles at you before she tries to relax against you. It’s difficult because you’re shivering, but also hot to the touch and you can’t seem to get settled. You turn around to face your wife and you whine as you curl yourself up into a ball and hide your face in her stomach. You groan before trying to speak through your emerging nausea. 

“You cooked dinner. I’m sorry we didn’t eat it.” 

Wanda shakes her head before she shushes you and runs her fingers through your hair. It takes you a minute to figure out if it’s helping or hurting, but in the end the touch is a welcome distraction from your nausea. 

“Don’t worry about it. It’ll keep.” 

You don’t say anything for a while as you try to fight off the urge to vomit. You remember that the last phase of being high on CBD is the nausea and fever phase. You can’t remember how long it lasts but hopefully not too much longer. 

“I love you, Y/n. You’re the most important person in my life.” 

You hold Wanda tighter when she says this and you take a deep breath as you try to let her words sink in. You don’t realize you’re crying until you sniffle a minute later. You’re immediately embarrassed and you wipe your eyes before hiding your face from your wife. Despite this, she hears what you say and she can’t stop her heart from breaking at your words.

“Thank you for loving me. I-I know I don’t de-deserve you.”

Wanda has a lot she’d like to say in response to this, but when she realizes you’re falling asleep she lets it go for now. She doesn’t want to argue with your when you’re not coherent, but she’s adding this to the ever-growing list of things to ask you about once you’re feeling better. She shakes her head still before she kisses the top of yours with a sigh. 

“You’re far more than I deserve, Y/n. Far more.”

When you wake up next you feel that you’ve returned to your senses. The clarity of your surroundings is as it should be, and you immediately groan when you see that the clock says 11:30. You turn over and see that your wife is asleep in bed beside you and you feel guilty all over again for dragging her into your nonsense. You sit up slowly before you rub the sleep from your eyes and realize how dry your mouth is. You’re also starving so you get up and wander to the kitchen for water and food. Boone is sitting out in the living room and he immediately turns at the sound of your footsteps and he jumps to his feet to greet you. 

“Hey buddy. You’re such a good boy.” 

You remember most of what happened and you love that Boone stayed by your side. He wanted to take care of you, and you love him for it. You remember how anxious you were and how sweet Wanda was when trying to calm you down and make you feel better. You hate being vulnerable, but you’re grateful that it was in front of someone you know won’t hold it against you. You sigh as you refill your glass before opening the fridge. Bucky must have put up the food Wanda made, and you immediately spot it and your mouth practically waters despite not knowing what it is. 

“Hungry?” 

You nearly drop the pot on the ground in surprise at the sound of Wanda’s voice. You turn quickly and see your wife heading toward the counter with a small smile. She runs her hand through her tangled hair before helping you by grabbing plates from the cupboard. You smile back at her before nodding and setting the pot back on the stove. You turn on the heat before turning to your wife and reaching out for her.

“I’m sorry, Wanda. I know you didn’t plan on tonight being like this.”

Wanda nods in agreement but she knows for a fact you didn’t either. This was an accident, and sure if it hadn’t been she’d be a little ticked, but since it was, she didn’t blame you at all. She just felt bad that you had to spend your night feeling paranoid and crappy instead of relaxing after your first day back at work. 

“It’s not your fault, Y/n, and despite agreeing to that ‘only your food’ rule, I’m mostly concerned about other things.”

You don’t have to think too long about what those are, but luckily the bubbling food in front of you requires your immediate attention. You take one of the plates offered and pile food on top of it before handing it to your wife. You make your own plate before walking towards the table that still has silverware set out. 

“Like what?”

You have a pretty good idea of what Wanda’s getting at, but you don’t want to bring it up first if you don’t have to. You already screwed up and mentioned why you hate Vision and there is no way you are getting out of explaining that without some divine intervention. You suppose it’s time to tell Wanda about what really happened, it’s been nearly 10 years after all. You focus on your food so you miss Wanda’s look as she sits down across from you with a sigh. She’s not sure now is the best time to have this conversation, but the words you’d said earlier about Vision are just ricocheting around her head. 

“Do you remember what you said about Vision?”

You set your fork down because you really can’t talk about this right now. You’re still a little off from earlier and your emotions are running high, but one look at Wanda tells you she’s not going to drop it. Still, you’ve always been a wishful thinker, so you might as well try. 

“If I say no, can we pretend I never said anything?”

Wanda unsurprisingly shakes her head as she studies you carefully. You’re antsy for sure, but you avoiding this, or at least trying to the way you are makes her realize it must be bad. It’s something beyond what Vision told you today, and the thought that he’s tormented you, manipulated you right under her nose makes her furious. She would change her mind right now and send someone to kill Vision tonight if you gave her a good enough reason to. 

“Absolutely not. I need to know what I’m killing him for.”

This makes you pause and you look to Wanda only to see that she appears completely serious. You just look back down to your plate and start to eat with a shake of your head. You try to take a few bites because you have a feeling you won’t be able to eat much once you start talking. 

“It’s really not a big d--.” 

Wanda doesn’t even let you finish your pathetic attempt to get the subject dropped. She shoots you a stern look that shuts you up quickly as she speaks. 

“Don’t you dare, Y/n. I know you better than that. Now tell me what Vision did to you.”

You don’t say anything for the longest time as you think about how it all started. You remember feeling three inches tall and not worthy to even look at Wanda let alone be with her. Despite everything she told you and what you felt from her, Vision had crept in and hit you where you were most vulnerable. He’d cut you down to size and almost made you leave the love of your life, all because he was jealous. You try to keep this part in mind as you look back up at your wife. She looks worried and angry at the same time, and you tell yourself that she’s not mad at you. She just wants you to tell the truth. You take a deep breath before you sit back in your chair and start talking. 

“It started after you introduced me to Yelena and Nat as your girlfriend. News quickly spread to Vision and he started to pop up everywhere.” 

Wanda’s a little surprised to hear how early in your relationship this started, but she doesn’t dare interrupt as she watches your expression change. You look for Boone only to reach out and pet him once you see he’s beside you. You smile despite what you say next, and Wanda’s face falls as you start to put the story together. 

“He would always seek me out when I was alone, and I swear every time he had something else to say that made me feel so unworthy of being with you, let alone breathing the same air as you.”

You shake your head as you remember how his cruel smile had haunted you for months, and how long it had taken you to realize his jealousy fueled his words that were ultimately lies. 

“He was jealous, and I knew that, but he was so good at exploiting my weakness and I started to find it harder and harder to disagree with what he was saying.” 

Wanda has to push her anger at Vision aside for the time being and just focus on you. She’s horrified to hear what Vision did to you so long ago, but she’s equally horrified by the fact that you hadn’t told her about it sooner. She can’t stop herself from asking despite knowing it wasn’t the most important thing, and when she sees you flinch, she realizes she shouldn’t have pushed. 

“Why didn’t you tell me he was doing this?” 

You shake your head as you think about the many times you’d considered doing just that. You had almost convinced yourself to do it, but in the end you just couldn’t. You were already so out of your league that you just didn’t want to rock the boat or give Wanda a reason to see that you really weren’t right for her. You were insecure, you were still in school and honestly what could you really offer her? 

“I couldn’t do that, Wanda. Some of the things he said…they weren’t wrong and I just didn’t want to give you a reason to change your mind about us.” 

Wanda doesn’t say anything immediately. She just pushes her chair back from the table and stands up to come to your side. You don’t say anything either, but just watch as she moves to sit next to you with a pleading look. She reaches for your hand and you give her your full attention once you realize she has tears in her eyes. 

“Detka, whatever poison Vision fed to you about not being good enough wasn’t true. I don’t care what he said, and I wish I could have known then because he would no longer be with us, but I mostly hate that you felt this way.” 

She squeezes your hand as she wipes tears from her eyes. She’s crying mostly out of frustration and hurt. She’s angry with herself for not noticing this when it happened, and not doing her job of letting you know you were loved back them. She hurts to think about how miserable you must have felt while keeping all of this to yourself. She breaths in a shaky breath before she’s reaching to wipe the tears you hadn’t noticed falling. 

“I’m sorry that I failed you, Y/n. That you didn’t know how much I loved you even then. I had already decided to spend the rest of my life with you. I should have told you how I felt earlier, maybe if I had Vision wouldn’t have gotten to you. I’m so sorry.” 

You’re shaking your head because you don’t want Wanda to take the blame for this. You’re the one who hid your feelings and what Vision was doing from her. How could she have known you were feeling insecure without you telling her? She was smart, but she’d been busy and she couldn’t read your mind. You lean into her and rest your forehead against hers as you take a deep breath. 

“It’s not your fault, Wands. I should have told you; I knew you loved me, I did, but then at the party--.” 

You trail off because you hadn’t meant to mention that, and you realize too late that Wanda caught your slip up. She’s frowning again as she looks at you, and you’re trying to figure out how to backtrack when she asks you to elaborate. 

“What party?” 

After leaving you and Wanda, Bucky had tried to go to sleep without a lot of success. He’d tossed and turned for an hour or so before he’d decided to call it quits. He couldn’t stop thinking about what you’d said about Vision being manipulative. He’d spent a lot of time with you over the years, and as far as he knew, you had limited interactions with Vision. They were near unpleasant and as short as possible for both of your sakes. It was obvious to anyone with eyes that Vision was jealous of you. He’d fallen for Wanda almost immediately and seeing her get married to someone else wasn’t easy for him. 

Still, this didn’t excuse whatever it was that he did to you, and he was dying to figure out what it was. He was feeling guilty that he’d missed something, that he’d missed you feeling miserable from whatever Vision did. He decides around 10 to go down to the gym and hit something for a while when it occurs to him who he can ask. He walks in and sees Nat already on the treadmill, and she turns when she hears the door open. She opens her mouth to greet him but sees how angry he is. 

“What’s wrong, Buck? Why so down?” 

Nat watches as Bucky walks by her to head to one of the punching bags. He doesn’t even bother to put on gloves before hitting once, twice and then again. 

“Vision’s a massive pain in the ass.”

Nat doesn’t disagree in the least, but she’s not sure where this is coming from. Rather, she wonders what Vision did this time. She noticed him around the compound this morning, but she wasn’t a glutton for punishment. She would never purposely seek him out for just any reason. 

“Agreed, what did he do now?” 

Bucky punches the bag one more time, sending it reeling before he shakes out his hand and looks around the room for gloves. He needs them if he’s going to keep this up which he definitely needs to if he doesn’t want to replace this bag with Vision’s face. Bucky shakes his head as he turns to face Nat who’s off the treadmill at this point. 

“Vision told Y/n that Wanda uses sex in interrogations, can you believe that?” 

If Nat had opened the water bottle in her hand and taken a sip, she would have spit it out all over Bucky. Her jaw drops and she draws back slightly at the horrifying image that this brings to mind. 

“What the fuck is his problem?” 

Bucky shakes his head furiously as he winds up another punch but stops short as he really considers this. Vision’s a little fucked up for sure, but why would he tell you something like this knowing that Wanda would find out? There’s no way she wouldn’t and once she did, she would of course go to Vision to tell him off. What does Vision gain from this particular lie?

“I don’t know, and why would he tell a lie that’s already gotten back to Wanda?” 

Nat frowns at this as she realizes Bucky has a point. Vision was obsessed with Wanda when the redhead first met the older man. He’s simmered down a little but he definitely still carried a near bonfire of a torch for her. Does he think that lying to her wife will get him in her good graces? Vision is either dumb as fuck, or he has something up his sleeve. 

She’s about to say some if not all of this when Bucky speaks up and renders her speechless. 

“Not only that but just now when Y/n was high from that cookie she admitted that Vision’s harassed her or something? I have no idea what she’s talking about, and Wanda doesn’t either, and it’s pissing me off!” 

Bucky continues to assault the bag in front of him as Nat stands in silence at the news of you bringing this up. She’s just ignoring the fact that you were apparently high because she doesn’t have the mental capacity to think about that right now. Instead, she focuses on you apparently admitting to your wife and Bucky that you have an unsavory past with Vision. 

You’d told her and Yelena this in confidence and sworn them to secrecy. She honestly would have thought you’d tell Wanda by now, but apparently not. She’s not sure what she can say in this case without giving herself away. 

You realize you’ve made a mistake, and you are unlikely to be able to fix it as you look to your confused wife. Wanda’s tired of the unpleasant surprises she’s getting this evening, and the thought of one more makes her want to scream. She hates that you seem to still be suffering at Vision’s hands and she swears the next time she sees him, she’s going to throttle him. 

“What party, Y/n?” 

You sigh before wiping your eyes and reaching for your glass of water on the table. 

“It was when I was still in school. You had some donor’s shin dig that I wasn’t going to be able to make, so you went alone.” 

You took a swig of the water wishing it was alcohol before setting it down with a thud. You can’t look Wanda in the eye because saying it out loud makes it sound even stupider than it did in your head, and it sounded pretty stupid. 

“I got out early and showed up later to find the party in full swing, and you on Vision’s arm.” 

You have to blink away the memory of that heartbreaking sight before you shake your head. 

“You two looked like the perfect couple and I just stood there watching everyone treat you like one before I just left. I ran and honestly planned to go drink myself to death, but Nat had seen me and ran after me.”

Wanda stiffens slightly at the news that Nat was somehow involved in this. Did she know about this before her? Has she known this whole time and never told her? She doesn’t have time to get upset before you continue your depressing story. 

“I ended up breaking down and telling her everything. I spent the night at her place, that she shared with Yelena at that time so uh she found out, but I swore them both to secrecy.” 

Suddenly it clicks, and Wanda remembers the night that you’re talking about. She attended a lot of events without you unfortunately, but there had only been one where Nat disappeared and then she couldn’t get in touch with you all night. You hadn’t come home and it wasn’t until she’d contacted Nat that she found out where you were. She’d been so worried and then so confused and jealous to hear that you weren’t coming home but instead staying with Nat. 

“I came home the next morning and you were so worried and loving that I just…I believed that you really did love me and I just decided to hate Vision until the end of time.” 

You manage a weak smile, but it disappears when you see Wanda’s expression. She’s stunned and you immediately feel bad about keeping her in the dark for all this time. You honestly don’t know what telling her would have done. How it would have changed things, but Wanda’s answering that question for you with the next words out of her mouth. 

“I’m going to kill, Vision, and I’m going to enjoy it.”

Vision laid in bed staring up at the ceiling as he listened to the recording play for maybe the fifth time. He’s had it on repeat since he finished editing the other one in preparation for tomorrow, but he’s since just listened to the uncut version that he’s had and kept safely guarded for nearly 15 years. He’d changed the formatting of it since he’d obtained it, so now it was on his phone instead of on a small tape that he’d managed to hide in Wanda’s bedroom. 

He sighs heavily as he closes his eyes and lets the sounds coming through his headphones wash over him. He stiffens and groans before reaching down his pants. He’s gotten in the habit of listening to this recording whenever he can’t sleep, or he finds himself longing for the redhead so much that he physically aches. Sure he’s tried sleeping with other women over the years, but it’s never done more than just satisfy a temporary need. He usually goes back to fantasizing about Wanda within the next few days and it’s gotten worse over the years. 

He touches himself to the sound of Wanda’s moans, and he climaxes only a few seconds after she does. He’s panting and wide-eyed as his high washes over him and he’s groaning in annoyance only a few seconds later. This isn’t doing it for him anymore. He needs the real thing, and he needs her soon. He’s already figured out how to get rid of you, it’s just a matter of doing so in a way that won’t rouse suspicion towards him. He wants Wanda to come to him for solace after having her heart broken, but she won’t do that if she suspects him of being the one to kill you. 

Vision sighs in defeat as he rolls out of bed and heads toward the bathroom. He needs to take a long cold shower and get ready to face the both of you tomorrow when Wanda inevitably calls upon him for an explanation. This wasn’t how he’d originally planned to go about it, but if he can cause conflict between you two and as a result make security lax around you, that will give him the perfect cover for taking you out. 

He lets thoughts of your death soothe him to sleep later, and he falls asleep smiling for the first time in weeks. 

Part 9

[under-the-aspen-tree]

A Moth To You (Chapter 13 - Tugging and Tearing) Aegon II Targaryen x (Bastard Velaryon) Reader

Series Summary: After a year travelling abroad, you have been called home to Kingslanding by your mother, Rhaenyra. Turns out your family has grown in your time apart.

Word Count: 4.3K

The wind had beaten your skin dry by the time you came down from the skies, panting and grinning. You could tell by the tightness of your cheeks that the oils you had so meticulously spread across your face and throat to protect you from the sun's glare had all but blown away, and yet you cared not. You had finally flown.

It took weeks before your hands had healed enough to remove the thick wads of bandage that covered them, and the skin of your palms was soft and scarred, but mounting Cerys and taking a lap of the seas beside Kingslanding had been the first ounce of freedom you had possessed in a moons turn, and you had taken the opportunity to escape for a time gleefully. The weakened flesh burned with the promise of fresh blisters from the leather handles of your saddle, burning welts already risen and red, but you knew they would callous over in time. The second flight would be far easier.

“You have barely healed, your grace. I wish you wouldn’t insist upon scampering back into danger at the first opportunity,” Ser Tystin, your sworn guard, said as you staggered down the steps of the Dragonpit, still smiling from ear to ear. The man had likely been waiting with his eyes turned to the skies for the hours you had been gone.

“Nonsense. Cerys’ back is the safest place for me now.”

In the wake of Boras’ betrayal, your safety was made paramount in the keep. Every man from Dorne to Winterfell knew of the threat made against a princess's life, and the fears of another attempt on the monarchy were thick and heavy on the people's minds. You had scarcely been allowed to wander the gardens in your recovery, but the fears grew duller as the days went on without fault. Some said your attacker was a drunkard, some said a lover scorned; rumours all. You knew the truth, at least part of it. Boras had been a hired sword and a poor one at that, likely sent by the same person who had gifted you that dreaded necklace. For them to have known Boras was your friend, they must have been in Kingslanding or perhaps had spies who were. But so long as you kept to the safety of your carriage, forever under the watchful eyes of Ser Trystin or the knights sworn to your house, you decided you were safe.

Even if you weren’t, you cared little by this point. The walls of the keep had grown awfully tiresome to look at as of late.

“You’re wanted in the Keep,” Ser Trystin said when you left your carriage nigh on an hour later, making to change from your leathers. Your footsteps crunched against the gravel of the yard's walkway as you made your way, servants pausing to bow their heads in your wake.

“The Keep is where I’m going. My mother?” When someone requested your presence, it usually was.

“Not this time, your grace, though I’m sure you’ll wish it were.” At the pointed raise of your brow, Ser Trystin continued with a regretful smile.

“Your uncle, the Prince Aemond, I’m told. A messenger came while I was waiting for you, and said the matter was of an urgent nature.”

“Not so urgent I cannot change before I speak with him?”

“I doubt it. The Prince has an impatient streak in matters he deems important. I would advise we make for him with some haste.”

You bit back the urge to smile at the resigned sarcasm, letting your guard lead you back into the Keep and towards Aemond’s chambers. Under normal circumstances, you would have been confused as to why your uncle wished so fervently to speak with you, but these weren’t normal circumstances. Your last conversation with the man still hung heavy upon your mind and, if Aemond was requesting you, it was likely he had made some sort of discovery. There was no chance in all the seven hells he would deign to hold council with you otherwise. You had to hold yourself back from running along the hallways of the Red Keep, eager to hear what your uncle had to say, but managed to keep yourself to a rather brisk walk instead. Ser Trystin gave you a brief, somewhat bemused smile at Aemond’s doors before knocking soundly.

“Enter,” Came the sharp voice from within. The knight opened the door before moving aside to let you enter alone. 

"No need to wait for me, ser," You gave the knight a short smile. "Be on your way."

Ser Trystin nodded dutifully and left, though he looked as though he did not want to. For all his vows, he served Rhaenyra as much as he did you, and you needed this conversation to remain private.

Your uncle's chamber was homelier than you expected. The four poster was beautifully made with sheets that reminded you of a cloudless night, while an empty fireplace stood on the other side of the room, the hearth pristine of ash and soot. Aemond had seemingly been pacing the room with his arms woven behind his back, his eye trained firmly upon the ground, and you felt somewhat nervous to realise he had likely been doing so for quite some time. His doublet was of a purple so deep it was almost black, and his silver hair was finely combed and pulled back into a sleek tie.

“Uncle....s.” You couldn’t help but sound reserved as your eyes fell past the man to the table beside his window, to which Aegon sat in a brooding sort of way, a silver cup in hand. His presence came as quite a surprise, and you knew the way your face fell by the smirk that Aemond shot you. One of honour and mirthful understanding. The elder of the two looked your way for only a moment, his violet eyes unreadable, before turning back to face the window. You forced your gaze back to Aemond.

“Ser Trystin said you wished to speak with me. I must apologise, I would not have flown so long had I known.”

Aemond scarcely moved except to speak, regarding you cooly. You wondered what was behind that perceptive eye of his. “The messenger told us as such, do not concern yourself. Sit, please.”

Looking between Aemond's guarded expression and the table, you pursed your lips and did as he said. Even as you sat down opposite, Aegon's eyes did not meet yours, softly illuminated by the grey light streaming in through the window. You had seen the man since that night in the Kingswood, though only in passing. He had not so much as looked your way if he could help it, turning his back as soon as you entered a room. In all honesty, you weren't so sure you minded. The idea of speaking with him turned your stomach, for you simply didn't know what to make of it. A part of you knew you should have gone to him, thanked him for saving you. Another part half wished you could chew him out for being so cruel in the first place that you felt the need to flee for solitude. Aegon was both your downfall and your saviour.

The silence drew on rather uncomfortably and you were certain Aegon could feel his brother's eyes trained on him rather pointedly. You felt your cheeks flush as you tried to ignore how awkward you felt, running your thumbs along the thick scars on your palms. Eventually, Aegon cleared his throat, barely sparing you a glance. 

"You're.... recovering well, I assume?"

It did very little to ease the tension, but you gave him a brief, forced smile. "Slowly but surely."

Aegon nodded with pursed lips, clasping his hands together on the table. "Good... good."

Once again, the room faded into an unpleasant silence, and the beady glare Aemond gave his brother was more than a little off-putting. Despite his best efforts, Aegon eventually met his gaze with an air of frustrated finality. "I... must apologise for my..."

His jaw tensed and he rubbed his hands together, staring at a silver ring on his little finger. His speech was clipped and tense as though the words had to be forced out, though they did not sound necessarily dishonest. "For driving you away that night. I... was purposefully unkind."

You raised your brows, though tried to cover your surprise at his apology. “....Thank you.”

Aegon nodded, keeping his eyes down. You couldn't remember the last time you had shared a kind word with the man, if at all, and even despite recent circumstances, it felt bizarre. You were almost expecting the moment of weakness to be taken advantage of with a cruel comment from the man, and yet he stayed silent. You were both quite grateful when Aemond spoke up from where he still stood, apparently satisfied. 

“Well, now that that is settled, I’m sure you’ll be glad to know I did not summon you to make good with my brother. I have news.

“I had several goldsmiths in Kingslanding take a look at your necklace, and those with any idea at all of its origins said it was not local work, nor did they have any idea as to whose it was.”

“So your news is that there’s no news?” Glad for the subject to change, for you to have any reason not to look at Aegon, you raised a brow. Aemond began to pace before your little table by the window, and his brother still kept his focus on his hands.

“Not necessarily. The goldsmith that made your necklace is not from Kingslanding, nor is he likely situated here as of now. The pendant is new and unscuffed, so it was probably made to order and shipped or sent here. The one behind the sale, the one who paid Boras, is likely not a man of the Keep.”

And yet his information rang useless. “That still brings us no closer to finding said man.” 

“Are we not? We know the man is not of Kingslanding, nor is he situated in our home. That tells us you’re safer than we originally thought and that you likely gained his attention during your travels.”

“Wonderful," You sighed, pressing your thumb and finger to the bridge of your nose. You had hoped for more than this. "We have narrowed him down to one person in the whole of the Seven Kingdoms whom I might have met, or perhaps just been seen by, in the year I was abroad. But he isn’t of Kingslanding, so that knocks... 250,000 suspects and leaves us with... the 75 million remaining of Westeros.”

“It’s something more than you discovered, is it not? There is only so much I can do with a necklace.”

You couldn't fight that. There was no need for Aemond to help you at all; you knew he and his brother had no love for you and yours. It mattered little that you had unknowingly dragged your uncles into the sidelines of this mess when they had no obligation to assist you. Perhaps that was why you couldn't understand your uncle's motives, why they seemed so unclear. He was, at least in part, doing it for Aegon's sake, but the extent he had gone to was more than what was expected of him.

At least I now know I am safer than I thought.

“So you’re saying he’s not in the red keep... So how do you explain Boras’ part?” It was the one aspect that truly confused you. How did this unknown man find out about your little friend?

“Spies, likely, which means money.” Aegon finally spoke up, his voice gruff. He held eye contact with you for only a moment before looking back down. Purple had never been a scalding colour until now. “They had to have followed you into Kingslanding the night I caught you in the streets, so they must be good.”

You bit down on your unease around Aegon. The man had saved your life, yet you could still never put aside your history. Aemond showed no reaction to his brothers words, and you knew he had been told of the transgressions, yet you still flushed at a secret you had kept so closely guarded being strung out within your uncles chambers. “If he has spies working for him then they must have followed me from the outer walls of the castle. They could be inside as well; it is likely, in fact. No matter their trade, it's as easy to whisper as it is to wield a blade.”

“Which means you must be more careful. You cannot leave the keep again unguarded, that’s for certain. I wouldn’t go as far as to leave your rooms without protection, nor would I suggest you take any servants into your chambers that you don’t know well.” Aemond spoke dutifully, finally going still to look down on you. He was the picture of a perfect prince, his hands clasped behind his back, his eye narrowed in on you in such a way you fought not the shrink back under the gaze. His intentions may have been unclear, but his help, in principle, was not.

“(Y/N), I don’t believe that man wanted you dead. If he did, he would have sent someone more proficient than a peasant," Aemond continued in your silence. “He has the money for fine jewellery and spies, a sellsword would have been simple enough to acquire. He wanted to scare you, to send a clearer message than a pendant, and likely to hurt you with the knowledge of betrayal.”

“He couldn’t have known Boras wouldn’t have killed me. He very much would have done if not for Aegon." You didn't know why you flushed further at the thought.

“A chance he was likely willing to take. You’re royalty, as much as it pains me to say, and you're scarcely without a guard of some kind.”

You didn't bother to so much as sigh at the bite behind that comment. At least you knew Aemond didn't like you that much, else you would have been fearing for his mental well-being with how nice he had been as of late. Still, he had to suggest at your alleged bastardy. “Still, even if what you’re saying is true, assumed safety is not safety.”

“This person has made their affections to you clear. I’m doubtful they want you dead, just aware of their presence. There’s a chance they think you know who they are.”

You almost groaned at Aemond's subtle prying, as though you had any more of a clue now than you did when you last spoke. “If I knew who they were, I would have had their head by now.”

“We know that, but they don’t. They could be delusional, simple...” The man continued, perhaps thinking it would strike a match within you and you would suddenly have a name, a face, anything. He sighed when your face remained impassive.

“I wish I had more, but I don’t. I just thought you would like to know.”

And yet he had done more than any other, and certainly more than you were owed. You sighed, shaking your head.

“No, thank you. I appreciate it, truly.” You offered him a small smile which he didn't return. Aemond rarely smiled. Swallowing, you looked between the two men for a moment before pulling out your chair. With little else to say, you were overstaying your welcome and had much to debate alone. “I should go.”

In an act that must have surprised Aegon even more than it did you, his chair scraped from the table as well. He cleared his throat, a certain tension forming as you stared at one another. “I’ll walk you to your chambers.”

You couldn't think of anything you wanted less. Even with his apology, you couldn't be certain if you were more angry with his callous behaviour or guilty that you had been the cause of his first kill. “There is no need, I’m capable enough.”

“You’re not.” You gritted your teeth at his easy dismissal. “And even if Aemond is right in you being safe here, we should err on the side of caution.” 

Once again, Aegon was protecting you. The night in the Kingswood has been instinctual. It had been the only option. This was a measured thing, something that could be helped, something he did not have to do. You felt as though you were falling further into your uncle's debt and you did not like that at all. Still, it would have been improper to deny him. Your stomach fluttered.

“Very well.”

You nodded your thanks to Aemond for his help, which he returned stiffly, though you did not miss the wordless communication between brothers as you stepped past them. Those matching eyes glancing to one another, the marble expressions that betrayed little of what they were thinking to your simple eyes. A telepathy you had not a single hope of understanding.

Aegon joined you in the hallway, though you did not loop arms. The silence was a tense sort of thing, especially when servants would stop and bow at your approach. It felt oddly wrong to be beside Aegon without a single insult slipping from his lips. Like you were just waiting for some blow to fall that never came. The silence brought forth thoughts, thoughts you wished to have only in solitude, and more plainly put, guilt. A guilt that had been gnawing at you for days. It had been easy to despise Aegon when he had been nothing but cruel, but it was much harder when you only walked these halls still because of his actions. Eventually, it got too much.

"I must confess my apologies."

You kept your face forward, only glancing at him from the side of your eye. Aegon was as impassive as ever, though you noticed the barest twitch of his pale brows.

"Is that so?" He asked in a measured, gravelly voice.

"Aye." Taking a deep breath, you stopped outside of your chambers, knowing that if you did not say this now, you never would at all.

"When we... were younger I humiliated you. I know that. I-" Something hardened in Aegon's pale eyes at your words and it took a genuine effort to continue. "I was wrong, cruel even. I shouldn't have acted as I did, and I'm sorry. Truly."

Aegon was silent for more time than you would have liked. His face didn't change in so much as a twitch or flutter of muscle, but it was his eyes that haunted you. Harder than steel, and lovelier than lavender. "Why are you saying this now?"

"Because it's the right thing to do. Because... because you sacrificed a lot for me in the Kingswood, and I'm sorry. You owed me nothing, and I live still only because of you."

For all his pride, Aegon looked even more uncomfortable at your apology; the acknowledgement of your wrongdoings and his nobility. He had always been an arrogant man, yet he seemed to shy from your kind words where you expected him to gloat. His jaw tensed and his lips tugged a little like he was trying not to scowl.

"Let us forget it. I would rather not debate that night, or any others under your influence, if I can help it."

"Of course..." Your chest tightened. You had hoped that with his insistence to walk you to your apartments, he would have perhaps been a little more open towards your attempts at reconciliation. No matter your history, you could only look at your uncle now and see those terrified eyes above you, that silver hair glowing in the moonlight as he checked you for wounds. It seemed he was more than happy to forget the interaction happened at all.

There seemed no end to your naivety, and yet you still asked. "Could you... forgive me?"

Aegon's gaze darkened, and he looked up the hallway as though impatient to leave. "No. You made a mockery of me, but I was acting like a cock so I will not begrudge you entirely for it."

"And yet you do."

"I hated you a long time before that day in the training yard, princess. You know as much."

"Why? I was never cruel." You knew why, or at least you assumed, and it only frustrated you. Do my hair and eyes truly offend you so? Or is it at your mother's insistence that you despise me?

"No, but you flaunt all that which I do not possess myself, and I am not a kind enough man to put myself above it."

That much had you faltering. You were both quiet for a moment as a servant passed, and you waited for them to disappear down the corridor before speaking in a hushed, incredulous whisper. "You're envious?"

Aegon was unperturbed. "I was, once. Now, I'm simply..."

A faraway look came into his eyes for a moment as he stared at something above your head. The man seemed as cold as he did ponderous, a steeliness coming into his expression as he met your eye. "Do you have any idea how lucky you are? Your mother's love in abundance, your year travelling the continent without care or duty, the admiration of all even despite your plain features and mindless insolence?

"You are my niece, and yet you have a better birthright than I; the firstborn son of the king. Your mother was made heir over me, your mother was loved more than me or my kin, and it is more than like that you will take her place on the throne someday. Two lines of women adored that come to the throne before I." 

Aegon laughed, a sound without joy, and shook his head, as though the concept brought him some twisted amusement. There was a lot to wrap your head around in his words, a lot to debate upon. 

"Since when did you have any craving for the throne?" You asked, frowning. 

"I didn't, for I was never taught to take it. Is it not still a slight, an utter embarrassment, that I am the first true-born son in Targaryen history to not ascend the throne?"

Aegon's expression was as hard as stone, and unflinching still. You shrunk under the gaze. "I'm... sorry."

No, I'm not, why should I be? It is hardly my fault that you feel so slighted. I certainly didn't deserve your years of torment for it. Yet you said it anyway, and you weren't wholly sure why. Do I care? Or is he just intimidating?

"Don't be. It is of little consequence now."

Aegon made to turn, but he faltered with his back to you. All you could see was a short sheet of shaggy, silver hair, and it was no relief to finally be free of his imprisoning gaze. At least you then knew what he was thinking to an extent. Now it was entirely cold.

"I can't think of you as good, (Y/N). I can't. It would be too much for me to bear."

Your hand was on the doorknob, but you faced that wall Aegon had put up in turning from you, a frown gracing your brows. In your eyes at least, he had given you little reason to care for his opinions, even if you did owe it to him to try. "Why? Surely it would be better than this anger."

"If you're not a bad person, what does that make me? I've never been able to overcome my resentment of you for that day in the training yard and I doubt I ever will. If you're not a bad person, then I'm just bitter." Aegon looked over his shoulder and the look in his eyes wasn't cold or steely. It wasn't hard like iron or sharp as a Valyrian blade. He looked as he did when you were children. He looked like a boy. "I want to be more than just bitter."

There was such a raw vulnerability in Aegon's hard words that you faltered. You were not a good person by any means, but it only made his sentiments harder to follow. For a moment, you saw not a man overcome with arrogance or acidity. You saw someone so viciously alone that your heart almost throbbed. Someone who had been raised with a poisoned kiss to the brow, but never anything kind or good. Love did not surge through his body with his beating heart. It was a bloodless sort of thing, an empty thing. He was angry. Angry and cold and desperate to know that he was not as damaged as he had been made to be. That you were just as bad so that he was not alone in his bitterness. That, with enough encouragement, you could sink to his level and, for a moment, he was not alone.

You swallowed thickly.

"Very well, Uncle," You said, for what else was there? You didn't know if you had the right to protest that it was unfair to drag you down to his level at every opportunity just to prove a weak point. Aegon gave a short, curt nod, lingering as though he had something else to say, before turning from you. His footsteps rung out in the stone hallways long after he vanished from eyesight. 

Even as you entered your chambers, the smell of smoke and sage lingered, a warm blanket over your aching mind.

[writingintheshadowsforever]

Yelena Belova x Reader Steal Your Heart Part 9

Summary: Yelena struggles to process her growing feelings for you while trying a way to avoid betraying you in the future.

Three days.

Its been three days since Yelena untangled herself from your body to crawl out of bed, and disappear into the night. Her phone started buzzing the next morning around eight. She already knew without a doubt it was you asking about her whereabouts. You probably assumed she slipped out to go get breakfast or something. But after an hour went by without her replying your texts were more frequent, and grew a bit more urgent.

She should've saw it coming after all it was the morning after the two of you had just confessed your love for each other. The night before after she rescued you from getting captured, and helped you complete one of the most important jobs in your career as a thief. Of course you weren't just going to let her slip away so easily.

The last thing Yelena wanted to do was up and leave you in the dark. But not too long after the two of you fell asleep in each other's arms. The blonde assassin was ripped from her peaceful slumber in a cold sweat, and a number of emotions swirling around in her heart to the point. Where it overwhelmed her so much Yelena felt like she was being suffocated by them. Being next to you brought her no comfort as she was pretty sure. You were the very thing causing the hurricane going inside of her.

So she did the only thing that came to mind. Yelena ran not even stopping one second to think about. How bad it would make her look in your eyes. Would you assume she went back to report to Valentina? While you might've let yourself fall her no doubt her connection with the woman made you proceed with caution.

Yelena planned to resolve these conflicting feelings in a matter of one day, but one turned into three and now she felt like she had dug herself into a hole. That would be impossible to get out of alone, and with limited options of people to turn too. She went to the only other person in New York City. Who she knew she could trust and might be able to help her.

Kate Bishop.

"So you're in love with her" Kate said repeating the very last words of the story. Yelena had spent the past two hours telling her over breakfast. She just needed to confirm she had really heard those words leave the blonde's mouth.

Yelena nodded sticking a forkful of waffles in her mouth.

"This is great."

"This is horrible."

Both statements were made at the same time, and the two friends stared each other down afterwards. Kate spoke up first "how is this a bad thing Yelena."

"I've never been in a real relationship before Kate, and the first time I find myself in love with someone. She's a target I've been hired to gain information on."

"Okay so this is confusing and I'll help you figure it out. How about that?" Kate suggested.

"There's nothing confusing about it I'm never going to see her again. Problem solved" Yelena said taking another massive bite of her food.

Kate closed her eyes and exhaled a deep breath. Keep your cool and stay patience she reminded herself. Kate knew this was going to be a rollercoaster the second Yelena broke into her apartment three days ago crying about her future broken heart. The assassin had already made up her mind about how all of this was going to end. She was just looking for someone to tell her she was doing the right thing.

"Do you really think y/n is just going to let you disappear from her life? Kate challenged her plan.

Yelena shrugged. "I don't see how she's going to stop me."

"Well from what you told me the girl is one hell of a tracker if you continue to ghost her. Then she'll probably put those skills to good use again to find you."

Her munching on the mac and cheese slowed down as Yelena went into deep thought about her plan. You were an infamous thief and she got to see your work first hand. When the two of went head to head with each other twice. And she was impressed considering she had never seen nor did she think. It was possible for someone to get the drop on Valentina the way you did. No doubt if you wanted to you could turn those skills around on her. If you needed to, but on the other hand Yelena trusted her abilities as a master spy. As long as she didn't leave behind any bread crumbs for you to follow. It would might be difficult, but not impossible to disappear without being able to follow her trail. She could leave behind false clues to lead you astray if need be.

The only card you could play that might work a hundred precent without fail is going to Valentina for info. On her whereabouts the woman would sell out. In a blink of an eye to get you under her thumb, but you wouldn't go that far for her would you? Your freedom was everything to you, and you were so close to your big endgame plan.

Yelena turned the scenario around onto herself coming to the realization. The main reason she chose to distant herself from you for these past couple of days was, because she wanted time to figure a way out of this mission. Before you shared something sacred with her, and she'd be forced to betray you. She chose to come to Kate for advice, over going straight to Valentina to cancel the mission.

Because deep down she knew Valentina wasn't going to make it easy by a long-shot, and Yelena didn't like to think about what she would do. When the powerful woman turned her request down, or worse decided to just send someone else after you. She'd break them in half without thinking about it. Yelena was at the point where she would do anything for you.

Have you fallen this hard for her to?

"I hate to say it but I think you're right." Yelena murmured swallowing the food in her mouth afterwards. She shoved the plate with a small portion of food left away, and proceeded to drop her head onto the table. The action resulted in harsh bang making Kate wince. The blonde seemed unfazed.

"Yelena come on at least you already she feels the same about you. The hard part is over with everything else that happens now is going to be easy." Kate said trying to reassure her friend.

"Don't lie to me I know enough about relationships to know none of them are easy. They're as fragile as glass very easy to break you mean? Yelena shot back not lifting her head from the table.

Kate chose her next words carefully. "Relationships require a lot of work and attention yes, but they're only as hard as you make them. You're making this so much more complicated than it needs to be."

"You don't get it" Yelena whined.

"Then explain it."

"She was just supposed to be a mission nothing more. I wasn't supposed to fall in love with her now I'm screwed when she finds out" Yelena blurted out jumping out of her seat to wonder over to the sink to stare out of the windows. Her eyes glaring into the early morning sky as the sun just began to rise.

Kate's response didn't come fast this time as she contemplated the truth bomb Yelena just dropped on her. She now understood why the blonde ran away from her feelings. "What kind of mission?" she asked trying to gauge the situation.

"Valentina wanted me to get closer to her and make her trust me, so she'd let her guard down enough to maybe tell me all her secrets. Give me something that could be used as leverage against her, so Val could force her to join her ranks." Yelena felt more disgusted with herself as she recounted her duties. She never should've agreed to this. It made her remember the reason why she promised herself she was done with seducing and manipulating after the Red Room was taken down. It never felt good inside instead it made her like more than a crappy person.

"Wait Valentina as in the woman who hired you to kill Clint two years ago?" Kate asked with a frown.

Yelena cursed under her breath as the tone in the archer's voice gave away. She wasn't truly asking but looking for confirmation. "Yes."

"You told me you were done with her Yelena. She lied to you about Clint, and caused you to nearly kill your sister's best friend." Kate exclaimed standing up to throw an accusatory finger at the blonde.

Yelena turned around to face her fuming best friend with nonchalant attitude. "I lied sorry Katie but I knew you would freak, and get all in your feelings about me still working for her. As for the Clint situation we had a nice long chat about the incident." She shrugged her shoulders when Kate raised a suspicious eyebrow at her claim. "She knows not to do it again."

"Then why not just back out of this mission? Has she paid you already?"

Valentina had wanted to send her payment at the start of this mission, and not just because Yelena was just that good. She suspected the payment was going to be a way to seal the deal permanently. Just in case Yelena woke up with a conscious one day and wanted out. So she turned the money down.

"No but if I back out she'll just send someone else to recruit y/n." Yelena said not revealing her true fears. The next person Valentina sent might not be as nice or patient as her. And she already had one falling out with the woman over the Clint situation. The nice long chat was more like Yelena putting over a dozen agents in the hospital. In her haste to get to the dark-haired woman while she was hosting a quite important meeting. None of that mattered to Yelena as she barged in making a beeline for Valentina to shove her down onto the table. Once reaching her and putting a blade to her throat to drive her point home. She wouldn't be played or toyed with anymore.

If it came down to you she might finish the job this time especially to keep you from finding out the truth. Anything to hide her lies.

"You need to come clean with her then" Kate said.

"What? You're joking right?"

Kate shook her head crossing her arms over her chest, and fixed Yelena with a hard stare. "If you can't back out this mission then the truth is going to come out either way. You need it to be on your terms, so you can explain."

The image of you standing a few feet away bristling with a newfound hatred for her, and betrayal in your eyes flashed in her mind. No amount of explaining would get through to you. The trust and bond built between the two of you would crumble just like that.

"She'd hate me" Yelena insisted.

"That's a risk you need to take Yelena because it's the only way. The truth will set you free you know."

A Few Hours Later

After spending another hour or so going back and forth with Kate, because the archer continued to stand her ground. On the truth being the only choice to get out of this mess.

"I'll lose her" Yelena argued.

"Well if she finds out you're lying you'll lose her anyway. Take the chance and be honest with her. You never know she might surprise you."

Kate left her to marinate on those words and Yelena decided it was time for her to return. Before you got too worried or suspicious leading to you taking upon yourself to search for her. She found you grabbing coffee and donuts at your favorite bakery that surprisingly wasn't a Starbucks. You told her the famous coffee chain was overrated and not worth the money. Before introducing her to this one smaller and less known place. She fell in love with it.

"I hope one of those are for me" Yelena said to get your attention.

You were exiting the bakery with a steaming hot cup of mocha in one hand, and a large white bag filled with donuts in the other. A glazed donut stuffed into your mouth your head swiveled in the direction of the familiar voice. There she was your maybe girlfriend Yelena Belova leaning up against the wall dressed in more casual clothes than her usual stylish ones.

"Yelena you're back" You tried to say but your voice was muffled considering the donut.

"Don't talk with your mouth full" she chastised you with a playful grin. Pushing off the wall to walk over and plant a kiss on your forehead. Her hand reaching in the bag and her eyes lit up with glee when she pulled out a chocolate icing donut with sprinkles. Her favorite even when she wasn't around. You still thought about her.

"I always get two just in case" You told now that the donut was devoured. "Come on I know a place we can talk."

It wasn't up for discussion no matter which way she spun it. Yelena had disappeared for days without giving you any type of heads-up. When you left for your mission you gave her a courtesy heads up. She owed you answers.

The spot came to no surprise to her. The same rooftop where the two of you spent the night talking and watching the sun come up. As you waited for the heat to die down after the museum robbery. "No one ever comes up here" You told her digging a blanket out of nowhere.

The two of you settled on it with the bag of donuts, and you didn't even bother to protest when she helped herself to your drink. It was a jumbo size another reason you loved the smaller bakery.

"So I guess I freaked you out huh? Yelena mused knowing you weren't going to tiptoe around the elephant in the room forever.

You nodded. "At first I figured Valentina sent you on a mission or something considering. You're still employed to her and everything." Your voice dropping low with a hint of anger in it when her name left your mouth. You clocked the way Yelena looked away in shame or guilt. It was hard to tell but you figured it stemmed from the fact that. At one point she was trying to get you join up with the woman against your will.

You decided to brush it off since that was the past, and none of it mattered anymore. "But then I realized if that was the case you would've left a note explaining, or at least texted me back you know. Then I figured you needed time and space to process us." You wagged a finger between the two of you.

You were spot on but part of her wished your mind was capable of digging so much deeper to unveil all her dirty secrets. To spare her having to tell them to you out of her own mouth.

"This is new to me and when I woke up that night with you in my arms. It was so different than all those other times I looked at you, and it was like I was really seeing you for the first time. My emotions were everywhere. It was just too much so I ran" Yelena explained drawing figures in the blanket with her finger. Eyes refusing to make contact with yours.

"Oh Yel" You whispered scooting over so your shoulder bumped into hers. That was all you did letting her choose rather or not to initiate any other physical touch. "I knew this was going to be a challenge from day one. I'm okay with that you're worth it I'd risk it all to be with you."

Her head snapped towards your so fast her eyes glistening with tears. She didn't realize it till they started to spill out. "I've never had a real relationship before. Any resemblance to a real relationship I've been in my life was a lie. This the first time I've had a real one, and I'm afraid of screwing it up."

You chuckled throwing your head back with a grin. She frowned but it morphed into a smile when your forehead pushed up against hers. "I'm not expert at this either I just know what I want, and I'm willing to take the time to figure this out. Even if it means taking things slow till we're both comfortable."

"You're really okay with that" Yelena questioned in disbelief.

"Yes I'm all in flaws and all you're stuck with me now Belova. Once I let someone in that's it." You replied bumping your nose into hers.

Tell her the truth. Tell her right now. Its now or never.

In the end instead of following Kate's advice Yelena did the complete opposite. As you were pulling back a hand caught you by the chin. Her grip was firm but gentle and she brought your face back to hers guiding your lips to meet hers in slow and passionate kiss. You followed her pace letting her lead how far this would go. One of your hands cradling the side of her face.

Yelena let herself get lost in the feeling of your lips moving in sync with hers, basking in all the emotions. That came flaring up inside her but the difference this time was she had no intention on running. She was now sure of the lengths you'd go to for her, and wanted to enjoy while it lasted. The truth can wait a little bit longer.

Two Days Later

"I know you're not a fan of my profession, but I'm not going to college." Yelena said leaning back into the car.

You let out a burst of laughter and her lips quirked upward, but she resisted the urge to smile. "I'm a professional thief Yelena I have no room to judge your how you make your living. A dishonest has gotten both of us farther in life than a honest one would've. I just don't like your employer.

"Then why are we here?" She gestured to the college right across the street from where you had her parked.

"I brought you here to meet someone." You revealed pausing when the double doors were pushed open, and a bunch of college students came pouring out. Your eyes scanned the crowd for one familiar face in particular.

A wave of nervousness washed over Yelena as her bright green eyes followed your line of sight once it honed on the target . A warm smile forming on your face as you relaxed. It was a boy slightly younger than both of you around Kate's age. She focused on his features looking for the telltale signs to confirm her suspicions. But you beat her to the punch.

"He's my baby brother."

Tag List: @danveration @yelenabelovasgf @xxromanoffxx @emril-osvigne @be-missed @natashasilverfox @yelena-beloved @xxxtwilightaxelxxx @catswag22 @here4thegayships @jeyramarie @wh0reforwanda @supercorpdanbeau @chloe7076 @ohmy-godyes @lizlil @musicinourlips

[yanderecrazysie]

rec but im awkward:

•

character: mad dog

sfw or nsfw: nsfw (only if youre comfortable with it tho)

how they meet: they meet at a ball

why they meet: they have an arranged marriage

the vibe: royalty, dark academic, (maybe mafia), winter, coquette-

extra: basically an arranged marriage for yandere!(maybe mafia! or prince!)mad dog x (maybe princess!)reader

I love how you made a form! This made everything much easier and clearer for me!

I wasn’t sure if I should do mafia or prince/princess and I discovered I’m not good at writing mafia lol, so I went with the prince and princess one, especially because I had a fairly good idea for it!

The NSFW is fairly light since I wasn’t sure how to fit it in the story super well and I’m still not great at writing it, but it is there at the end!

Title: Silent

Pairings: Kyoutani Kentarou (Mad Dog) x Reader

WARNINGS: Yandere themes, dub-con sexual content (NSFW), Kyoutani is manipulative without saying a damn word lmao

Summary: Prince Kyoutani proposes a contract that you can’t refuse.

silent

/adjective/

not expressed aloud

You only met him once.

It was a ball meant to raise spirits and forge stronger connections between your kingdom and a few others. As the crown princess, you had a major role in conversing with all of the other kingdoms’ crown princes and princesses.

If you were to be honest, you barely remembered him.

There were so many people to greet and be polite to and dance with and talk business with. You only realized he was the crown prince of Seijoh because of his outfit, not because you recognized him or anything like that. You were a busy woman, after all.

For some reason, among all of the crown princesses and high society women, you were the one that stood out to him. So much so that he had demanded an arranged marriage with you.

His father did all of the talking. Prince Kyoutani said not a word, though the king made it clear that his son was the one who requested the arrangement. Strange how someone so eager to make such a huge life decision could act so disinterested.

To make things even more confusing, the marriage contract was filled with rules meant to be followed, with no listed consequences. One would think that, if you were to break the terms, then the contract would be voided, but that didn’t seem to be the goal by placing lines like “Neither party will commit adultery” and such.

You knew that, as a princess, you had a duty to marry a prince to strengthen the bonds between the two kingdoms, but this just seemed so sudden. You weren’t ready.

The king of Seijoh seemed to accept your answer, but it was only a day later that he called another urgent meeting. He seemed shaken as he informed you that his son did not accept your rejection and that he would go to extreme measures to ensure the two of you married.

Declare war against your kingdom because you wouldn’t marry him? Was he insane?

Your kingdom was enjoying a century of peace. You couldn’t be the ruler who dragged them into a war based on her own selfish feelings, could you?

You could almost see the victorious aura that Prince Kyoutani radiated.

The two of you married in early spring. It was a beautiful wedding- even you had to admit that through your tears. Prince Kyoutani had hired someone to do most of the planning and they had done a great job, with the fancy decorations, the gorgeous dress, and the delicious cake. 

You couldn’t help but notice it looked very similar to the ball you two had met at, just all white instead of red and gold. You wondered if that was on purpose or merely a coincidence, but you assumed the former.

Your husband hadn’t spoken a word to you yet, but you could tell his emotions even through his stoic mask. You had always been good at doing so, since that was an important trait to have during business meetings.

Maybe that made it worse when he coaxed you into bed, fingers trailing up your thigh as he silently gazed down at you with a hunger that terrified you. His other hand just-as-silently slipped under your poofy white dress, searching for purchase on your breasts, no doubt.

You’re just as quiet as he is, reminding yourself that it’s for the best. For your kingdom.

His finger hooks around your panties, pulling them down and off, his tongue darting out to wet his lips as he does so. His fingers return immediately, playing with your pearl until you squirmed and whimpered under him. His other hand groped at your breast roughly, still somehow setting you ablaze with lust.

You find yourself grinding hopelessly against his fingers as he slides two into you at once. It’s too much, too fast for your first time, but you aren’t complaining any longer.

He’s grinning eerily in the candlelight and a part of you balks once more at the thought of being his wife, but your eyes cloud over in pleasure as he resumes his rubbing against your clit. You can feel him hardening against your thigh as he gets infinitely rougher with you.

You’re a whining, moaning mess, but Prince Kyoutani remains silent. 

He never really had to say a word to get his way, did he?

[captainsimagines]

pretty woman, this is me trying || eight

Summary: Bucky Barnes does not like to be touched. He’s completely ready to live a distant life and give up when the time is right. Until Stark hires him his own personal pretty woman. Over time, Bucky Barnes begins to learn how to touch again. How to feel again. How to love himself again.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female SexWorker!Reader

Trope(s): Holiday Fanfic ; Slow-Burn ; Friends to Lovers

Based on the Song(s): sweet nothing by Taylor Swift and Iris by The Goo Goo Dolls

(8/14)

Mini-Series

Warnings: relived nightmares; explosions; canon-level violence; explicit language; panic attacks; softness

Word Count: 2,670+

~

     Bucky hated canceling plans. Especially if what he’s canceling for is Avengers business.

It was a rare thing for Bucky to suit up nowadays. Steve almost always made sure he wasn’t needed or subbed for him. But this was Hydra business, and no one knew Hydra better than the Winter Soldier himself.

The mission was simple: Infiltrate the base, rescue any forgotten hostages, collect classified files, then set the place ablaze. All Bucky had to do was lead the team through the halls.

His mind would remember. He remembered every twist and turn the Soldier took while he was conscious. He just prayed it wasn’t a place where they froze him, or where they did the unthinkable.

“Are we ready?” Steve called, strapping the shield onto his back. He glanced from team member to team member, his gaze landing on Bucky longer than the rest. Bucky narrowed his eyes, clenching his jaw.

It wasn’t Steve’s fault Bucky was dragged from his perfectly quiet apartment. Away from you and Axel. Poor Axel was probably pawing the front door while he waited for Bucky to return. But it was Steve’s fault for putting Bucky at the front of the group. The leader. A push that attempted to show Bucky that he was trusted, that leadership was a good quality. A quality he had in the Second World War.

Not now. Not in the future.

“Ready,” Bucky answered, adjusting his earpiece before jumping from the quinjet. He landed on the dirt, only slightly cracking his knees. He walked without checking if the team was following—they obviously were. He could hear their breathing. Their fingers brushing the triggers of their guns.

The hallways always looked the same. The same gray, boring brick. The same cold atmosphere. Bucky led them through the entire base, pausing to let Natalia and Clint collect evidence. Steve quickly sketched the layout of certain rooms and of random maps they encountered.

His earpiece crackled with Jarvis’s voice, but it was distorted. He sounded urgent, and that immediately raised a thousand red flags for Bucky.

“Pack it up,” Bucky ordered, lifting his gun and aiming around the corner.

“We still have one section to scout,” Steve countered.

“I said,” Bucky growled, “Pack it up.”

Steve stared at his friend, searching his face. Bucky’s earpiece continued to crackle.

“Okay,” Steve surrendered. “Pack it up.”

The brick wall near Natalia and Clint suddenly exploded, sending smoke and debris directly into their bodies. Steve yelled for them, lunged even, but the wall near him also caved in. Bucky held his hand out, gripping Steve’s just in time, and tugged him into his chest. He turned, shielding Steve with his body as Steve used the actual shield to cover Bucky. Steve stuttered incoherently, probably too stunned by Bucky’s close proximity. But Bucky didn’t give him time to think too much about it. He stepped back with the intention of finding Natalia and Clint under all that rubble.

Masked men ran from all directions, some firing their weapons and others abandoning the base altogether. Bucky couldn’t tell if they were Hydra or not. If they were, he promised himself he would get through it. Finish the mission, protect his friends, and crumble later.

This is what training with you was all about. Being able to face situations where touch was inevitable. His friends needed him, and he would let himself be needed.

“Get down!” Steve yelled, absorbing the flash of bullets with his shield. Bucky dove the other direction, clawing at rubble with speed. Brick by brick, he tore his way to his friends. They were hurt, and they needed him.

He was needed.

Movement caught his attention, and a moment later Clint kicked his way out. Clint panted heavily, his forehead and bare arms bleeding. He moaned in pain, clutching at his stomach.

“Are you okay?” Bucky asked, still moving rubble in his search for Natalia.

Clint nodded in response. He readied his bow, took a deep breath, and went to help his Captain. Arrow after arrow, precision in each fire.

The voices were growing louder. It was two against however many. Bucky should be fighting, lessening the number of bullets in his rifle. But Natalia was still unaccounted for, and her human lungs could only withstand so much pressure.

Another explosion, this one knocking him from his kneeled position. He made to get up, but a heavy weight pushed at his chest. Rubble, brick—No.

No.

It was a foot.

“The Soldier.”

Bucky choked, his eyes flashing with fear. He didn’t recognize the man. He was certain he had never encountered this man before in all his life. But it was the dominance, the sheer pressure of his boot that unnerved Bucky. How a man could look so evil just by looking down at him… It was almost poetic.

Bucky shook his head, his mouth wobbling against his will. “Get off of me.”

The Hydra agent simply stared, angling his head as Bucky spoke. Like Bucky was speaking another language entirely.

And wasn’t that the case? Bucky Barnes was nonexistent in this realm. It was the Soldier’s voice they were familiar with. And the Soldier had never spoken much.

“Congratulations on escaping us.”

He was going to vomit. He was going to tremble directly out of his own skin.

“I’m so glad you’re going to do it again.”

The man knew Hydra had lost. That they would continue losing. That this base was only the first of many, and he wasn’t going to leave here alive. This was a taunt. A taunt aimed at Bucky given the position they were currently in.

Bucky raised his gun, pointing it at the man’s head. The agent didn’t move, didn’t frighten. He looked at Bucky, his mouth splitting wide, and laughed.

Foot still applying that awful pressure, he looked down at Bucky and laughed.

Bucky pulled the trigger, ignoring the horrible sound of heavy meat slapping against the concrete floor, and vomited in the corner of the room.

All his progress, all his breathing techniques, all his past—made a joke.

He vomited until his stomach truly felt empty. Until his common sense kicked back into gear and reminded him of Natalia.

He could break later.

Natalia needed him.

He went back to the rubble, avoiding the heavy stream of fresh blood coming from the dead agent, and searched. Picking up brick by brick, Bucky practically buried himself in his search.

But—

There.

Her slender hand.

Bucky did his best to dig her out, catching stray bricks before they hit her exposed limbs. He brushed soot from her cheeks, pushed back her hair, and pressed his ear to her chest in search of a heartbeat. An unnecessary effort—the only thing powerful enough to kill Natalia Romanov was Natalia Romanov herself.  

She was knocked out, unable to stand and unable to carry a weapon.

So Bucky took a deep breath and picked her up, carrying her bridal-style out into the hallway. Past the pile of dead bodies, following Steve and Clint out as a unit.

The quinjet caught up to them, operated automatically. The back opened, ushering them in. Steve ran forward, shield still propped in case of hidden threats. Clint kept glancing at Bucky, then at Natalia’s face, obviously stunned. Bucky held Natalia tight, doing his best at elevating her neck and keeping her warm. Her eyes moved fast behind her eyelids, as if trying to wake herself up. She had taken a hit to the head.

At the foot of the quinjet, Bucky stumbled. He fell forward, hugging Natalia close so she wouldn’t take the impact. But this stop, this sudden lurch back to reality, hurt Bucky’s body. Holding Natalia became a burden, a trigger to his gag reflex. He held her tight, fighting himself, refusing to give in.

“It’s okay, Barnes,” Clint’s voice sounded, soft and tender. “Hand her to me.”

Bucky shook his head. “I can do it.”

“I know you can. You were doing it completely on your own. But we have to go.”

Bucky tried standing, tried digging into that abyss of nasty super strength his body caged, but his legs kept wobbling. This wasn’t happening. Not now.

“It’s only a few more steps, Barnes. You can throw her ass to me in just a few more steps.”

Clint’s attempt at a joke had Bucky trembling. Still, he swallowed that nausea, that pang of disgust with skin other than his own, and lurched.

Lurched those few extra steps needed so the quinjet doors could close completely.

And once they did, Bucky dropped Natalia.

“Nat deserved that, no doubt,” Clint joked, scooping Natalia into his own arms. He was battered and bruised and yet, Clint still carried her.

Why couldn’t Bucky’s body allow him the same grace?

Bucky remained kneeled, shaking, looking down at the hands that had achieved and lost so much in the time span of fifteen minutes.

“Buck?”

Bucky looked up at Steve, ashamed by the awful and troubled expression he saw there. “Fly us home.”

Steve made to reach out, to comfort him, but Bucky fell back. Avoiding his touch.

Steve failed to restrain the sound of hurt from his throat. The touch of protection in the hallway wasn’t enough, Bucky understood that. But it was all Bucky could give for now.

“I’m sorry,” Bucky whispered, continuing to shake.

Steve’s eyes glossed over. “It’s okay, Buck. Just let me know when, okay?”

“When?”

Steve bit his lip, his breath stalling. “When I can touch you again.”

Steve turned back to the controls before he could see Bucky’s expression of pure pain.

He was trying. Bucky was trying. He had hired a companion who was easing him into it. He was getting used to it. This was just a minor setback. So much happened that it overwhelmed him. The agent’s confrontation overwhelmed him.

He wanted to tell Steve that he was making progress. That he could hold someone’s hand again and allow his hair to be braided.

He was making progress, unbeknownst to Steve. He wanted to scream it and provide the proof.

Instead, Bucky tucked himself into a dark corner, counting the seconds until he was able to see you again.

~

     Hydra base exploded. Barnes not doing good.

Stark’s message had you dropping your groceries and sprinting from the store to your car. Fuck the subway, fuck the taxis—driving yourself would allow more illegal manuevers.

Security let you in after you threw them your I.D, disregarding your urgency. They probably assumed your problem would be settled by the Avengers themselves quickly.

You sprinted down the hallways, running into the night crew and other unfamiliar faces. But one face, beautiful and bruised, met yours.

“Are you okay?” you asked Natasha, your voice splintering near the end.

Her grin was feline. “I love that that’s the first question you asked, even though it’s not the question you had.”

You made a pained sound in your throat. Natasha quickly put you out of your misery. “I’m okay. He’s in his apartment.”

You tried your best to give her an appreciative smile, but what formed was neither kind nor awkward. A wobbled smile. You bid her goodbye, finally noticing Axel by her side.

If Axel was here with her, it meant she went to go get him for a reason.

This was bad.

You sprinted to the elevator and waited those dreadful, stretched seconds. Didn’t matter how fast you ran. Bucky was going to feel far away until he stood in front of you.

“Bucky?” you called, closing the apartment door behind you. The lights were off, but the faint sound of water running let you know someone was home. The moon shined through the long windows, illuminating your path to Bucky’s bathroom. Your breath stalled when no other noise followed. Just silence accompanied by running water.

“Bucky?” you tried again, pushing the bathroom door open. The shower was entirely glass. Spacious enough that five people could fit in there with leftover wiggle room. You glanced around, noting the foggy mirror and damp marble. You shrugged off your jacket and gloves, squinting hard to see through the steam. “Bucky?”

There, on the shower floor being pelted by the hot droplets, was Bucky. Naked, knees curled up to his chest and long hair covering his face.

Defeated.

“Oh…” A small whimper escaped from your mouth. You brought a shaking hand to your mouth, debating your next move. Slowly, you stripped until you were left in your undergarments. Nevermind the heat or the steam. Bucky was breaking.

“Look at me,” you practically begged, kneeling in front of him. He made no movement, no indication that he knew you were there. He stared blankly at the marble floor, eyes cold and nearly white. “Tell me what happened.”

He didn’t move. Didn’t unhook his arms from around his knees, nor did he stop you as you touched the pads of your fingers to his skin. You traced tiny circles, then your name, then his name. Anything to pull him from that dark abyss that was swallowing him.

Finally, in the most broken voice you had ever heard, he muttered, “He laughed at me before I killed him.”

You froze.

“He laughed at me as I pointed the gun at his face. He knew about me. What Hydra did. And he just… Laughed as I pulled the trigger.”

“Then he deserved it.”

His gaze lifted, his eyes stern. “I didn’t want him to see me.”

“Bucky—”

“He saw me,” he breathed, his face falling. “And he laughed.”

You lunged, but abruptly halted before barreling straight into Bucky’s massive build. He didn’t stop you or wince in fright.

“Can I hug you?”

Bucky searched your face, eyes darting from your eyes to your cheeks to your lips. Maybe searching for hints of violent intent, you didn’t know. But he searched no longer as he reached out first, and tugged you into his chest. Curling against you, molding you into his grip.

Safe. You felt safe in his arms. And it hurt you to realize this considering Bucky was breaking. It wasn’t the right time to have this epiphany. But moments like these were crafted with absolute certainty—the sudden drop of the stomach, the playful numbness of the fingers, the burst of glorious red within the chest. Epiphany’s were one’s own, settled with a date and specified time.

Here was yours.

As Bucky gave you a small piece of himself, your body gave one back instinctively.

“I’m going to stay here, okay?” you told him, lifting a hand to cup his head from behind. Water splashed into your face but you ignored it. “I’m going to stay here and have you hold me for however long you need to. I am yours to hold.”

“You’re mine to hold,” Bucky repeated, hugging you tighter.

“Good, good,” you soothed.

“I don’t like fighting,” he admitted, his lips dangerously close to your bare shoulder. You pushed the need to kiss him deep down. “I don’t like reliving my past.”

He was a boy taken from his youth. Ripped from the life he hadn’t quite constructed yet and placed in the middle of a war. Thrown off an icy edge and abandoned. Pulled apart and put back together.

“I just want to be at peace. With your cookies, and Christmas, and Axel, and… And you.”

“You have me.”

His lips brushed against your shoulder, experimenting with the feeling. He didn’t kiss you. Instead, he lifted his head and met your eyes again.

“Would you believe me if I said I’m just too soft for all of it?”

Instead of a verbal reply, you bent to kiss his shoulder yourself. His breath jumped. You looked up at him, questioning if he was okay. His chest rose unevenly before he nodded, inviting you to kiss him again.

You kissed his shoulder. Both flesh and metal. Over, and over, and over again.

Until your skin turned raw underneath the water.

~