#even though I'm really discouraged rn.....

[terriblegam2r]

What is happening to Carmy and Sydney's relationship in this third season couldn't help but give me deja vu of what happened to Rick and Michonne's relationship in season 5 and 6 of The Walking Dead before they became canon. And it gives me a little bit of hope for Sydcarmy, and I'll explain why:

For anyone who hasn't seen TWD (and to try to make it tldr as possible) - starting in the back half of season 5, Rick and Michonne (and co.) get to this sheltered community and Rick suddenly starts to get attracted to this random woman who lives in said community (which was clearly OOC for him to do at the time). While his infatuation for this woman grew, his very close bond with Michonne (that was well established and cultivated up until this point) suddenly took a backseat in the show. They started to share way less scenes together and their relationship became a little strained (but in Richonne's case it was mostly about them not getting enough screen time together before canon). It was clear that the majority of the audience wasn't going to be invested in Rick's newfound infatuation so in order to sell it the writers strategically separated Rick and Michonne during this period, because the writers knew that Richonne was the most popular relationship among fans and had the most chemistry on the show so they couldn't show Rick and Michonne share screen time otherwise it would clearly steal the spotlight from Rick's development with this new character. So the writers chose to downplay and ignore the characters and actor's insane chemistry to entertain Rick's infatuation and make it more believable instead and to the show's ultimate detriment. Rick and this woman do eventually kiss (in a dank, dark garage at night (which kinda reminds me how a lot of Carmy and Claire's scenes are shot, but I digress)), but literally the very next day he's looking Michonne up and down (mostly to Andrew Lincoln's credit lol) and telling her that if the community gets overrun by zombies then they should ditch the community and save themselves and their main group (he didn't include said woman in the discussion either).

I know that what is happening with Sydcarmy on The Bear right now is not really encouraging for the future, there is still hope that the writers could be going the typical Hollywood route of "the main character gets into their first relationship that is ultimately doomed to fail only for the main character to then realize what he/she wanted and needed was right in front of them this whole time" Trope like how they did on TWD. I've seen it done before and I've been in these same trenches with you (and it was a really dark, sad time for Richonners as well). Of course it doesn't mean that what I've experienced in other shows will automatically be applied to this show, however there is still a chance that it could go down that same route in the end. The series is not over yet.

Even though the signs are small, they are there. Don't let anyone gaslight you into thinking otherwise.

[rubys-domain]

it took for-fucking-ever to get a marechaussee atk sands. but i finally got one. after countless useless artifacts. at least i got a lot of fodder i guess

[khaoala]

Mexico tickets sold out in less than an hour lmao fkt finally in their home turf of faroff lands fans are literally in a bloodbath rn for tickets idk I'm just really proud of the boys gmmtv needs better marketing and research depts lmao they suck at knowing who has more pull in which country especially with Brazil still not being announced like they were on the charts for every episode stupid company truly only going by the influencer numbers given out by ad agencies smh

i never doubted the power of our hermanos. if they aren't going to come to south america and brasil, at least i know fkjd will receive the amazing love of the latinos through mexico.

and see, idk what's the deal with gmm and fanmeets in brasil yeah? bc first of all, it took them almost a year to bring another couple after fk even though fk themselves said that with the amount of people that filled the venue that day, that would be considered a big fanmeeting back in thailand (and there was also the overselling tickets issue), so you know... not a small feat, there's interest. fk also went back to that company talking about us a lot. so far, we've had earthmix, jimmysea (in their fm here), forcebook, emibonnie and mark (THAT I CAN REMEMBER) saying wow it was really impressive, i really hope we can go there. AND FIRST in his birthday event last year saying that the brasil fm left a big impression and like you said, we showed up every wednesday for the tags (even though we were going against big brother brasil man, that shitshow gathered so much traction at the time).

the one thing i can think that could be the reason is that they don't like working with the company that brings them here or there are many scheduling issues preventing them to work together, which is highway (this same company is busy with the jeff satur concert and the yinwar fanmeeting that will happen soon if i'm not mistaken), but there are still many others!

i'm just so discouraged man, for real (if anything i'm keeping my hopes low in hell so if they do announce something, i will be over the moon about it).

[gotafewtricks]

It is I, the silly animal anon. I come bearing more requests such as a centaur!reader with hanzo. I just thought it'd be goofy as hell. I IMAGINE THE VOICE LINE WHERE ORISA TALKS TO HANZO ABOUT HIM RIDING HER INTO BATTLE AND LIKE TRANSFERRING THAT TO READER? 😭😭

Have a nice day. I hope you're doing well in school!

★ "I- What a preposterous thought!"

Glad to see you swing by again :3 I like the animal theme going on; and I hope I did well, especially since I am not very knowledgeable in Greek mythos !! & I'm well, hope you are, too! I'm just stuffy rn due to allergies; and mhm! School's well !!

With how first impressions would go, he'd probably have to blink twice to fully believe what was in front of his eyes. Even if his family sought forth the dragon, and Hanzo's extensive knowledge of his culture's mythos, it'd feel natural for him to think of this as normal—whenever you'll have to call him out on his staring.

So many thoughts would race through the archer's mind right now. Who are you? What are you? Why are you mentioning how his jaw's dropped?

Hanzo would have to compose himself with a quick "ahem"; as he'd clear his throat before he could advance any further. His knowledge on centaurs felt elementary, as he thought about such a topic even more. The marksman would glance over your body, a particular thought humoured him as he'd break into a smirk; before coming to the realization you have your bow firmly in hand, as you'd trot toward him.

He never was one into equestrian sports, as most of his free time during his servitude towards his family included wielding the blade. Now, that is not relevant to him; considering his promise to never even dare touch such a weapon. His bow was his safest option to hone his skills, and to also keep up his job as a mercenary.

"I know what you're thinking," you'd say, breaking him out of his thoughts. "You wish to ride me into battle?"

Prepare for a flustered Hanzo, shaking his head out of pure humiliation that you'd want to point him out like that. Even with his experiences prior did not revolve around the idea of cavalry, he couldn't help but entertain those thoughts his mind was plagued with! Considering he trusted that, due to your heritage, you were also a skilled hunter with the bow, then-

"No, why would you think that? Do I come off as that shallow?" Hanzo would then interject, making up a lie to make himself look as if he wasn't the one red-handed here. "I'd have more respect for..."

With just one knowing grin from you, he'd have to scowl. You won.

You didn't want to just leave him hanging there, though. You did offer your assistance for his idea, of which he tried to make it sound as if you were "doing it out of pity"; but, in reality, you could tell that his eagerness through his body language told you otherwise.

I feel as if Hanzo would know proper etiquette with riding on horseback; I'd say that during his trips throughout Japan, and the world, too, he'd understand a few concepts. You'd really need to teach him and be patient.

He's never really gotten... this excited for a rather childish concept. Do be gentle, if you were to muse your comments with Hanzo and tease him, as it'd make his a bit discouraged on acting more upon these little scenarios. Let him have his fun! Though, please do humble him if he ever gets too high and mighty on his high-horse... aha.

He'd somehow revere your untamed nature, if you exhibited one; being free, and guided by your own motivations and wills. Hanzo would see himself in you, and in a way, there was a beauty of it.

Whenever the two of you got closer, Hanzo would love to do nothing other than run his hands through the course hide of yours; you and him would normally then meet up during the night, the stars blanketing the dark skies.

I'd feel like he'd have a basic understanding of astronomy and astrology respectively, though, once you start talking the alignment of stars and planets, you cannot help but laugh at his confused expression—explaining the different relationships between those bodies.

You'd laugh at how he'd get confused with the different constellations, mumbling to himself about how you got an image of an air pump out of spotted dots. You would then correct him that it was actually "Antila"; but he'd digress. Hanzo would have genuine interest if you were to act so enthusiastic about the study; matching the energy lovingly, being more comfortable with expressing his newfound interest.

Whilst the two of you would train, as much as he would prefer the comfort of solitude, Hanzo would love to gauge at your ability; your specialty as an archer.

He'd hint and hint at wanting to practice his abilities on horseback; making his request subtle; even if you did allow him to ride on you, or if you didn't care. Hanzo still was trying to make sure that you were comfortable, whilst also wanting to fulfill his own curiosities.

You'd make fun of him, calling him a cat with how he'd just tilt his head at you. If you didn't mind the staring, you'd further joke along with him; causing him to always shake his head in embarrassment. Every. Single. Time.

[ecogirl2759]

I am posting to literally every Fandom rn and I'm sorry but I neeeeed to get this out

I LOVE looking at Malorn Ashthorn through a very literal lense. Because that makes him literally one of the most tragic characters in Wiz <3

(Came back up after writing this whole post and realized it's kinda sorta very long. So, full rant is under the break ^w^)

Edit: Please forgive any spelling mistakes, I wrote this all on my phone, which sucks lol

Every time you go to Ravenwood, he's there. Malorn, without fail, is always standing by the crater at all times. (This is what I mean by literal lol, since his sprite just wasn't put in any other locations.) Other students keep coming and going throughout the day, able to take rests in their dorms and occasionally go on field assignments, but Malorn can't do that. He just has to stand there. Waiting.

He's practically forced to be there, too. He's "Acting Professor Ashthorn" after all. He has to be there just in case a student drops by, and everyone works on their own schedule. That includes all the other Death students, especially since they're on independent study and literally have no time table to work off of. So, to make sure he can actually do his job, he needs to be ready at all times. He needs to always be on the clock. He can't leave.

What's more, he can't even go to the headmaster's office. He can't leave his station, so he can't go negotiate with Ambros. He can't ask for breaks. He can't catch up on news. He can't give or receive progress reports, assignments or updates. Unless he's deliberately called, he is, quite literally, trapped in this catch22 of seclusion.

Malorn also can't further his own learning in any meaningful way. All his other fellow students are off on assignments, doing practical work and honing their spells. Not to mention that it seems--based on Penny's side quest--that Ambros is the one who gives them their work. But Malorn can't move. Even if he got assignments, he would never be able to complete them. He's literally not allowed to learn.

Also, no one really ever shows up to Malorn's little corner of Ravenwood anymore. The other students don't actually need to go to him for anything, since they know most if not all the same spells he does, as well as not needing to turn their assignments in to him. New lore suggests that studying Death magic is wildly unpopular now that Malistaire is dead/evil/dead again, and old lore states that the already existing Death students are actively being discouraged from continuing their studies / persuaded to study different schools. Considering how few Death students you come across in-game, (keeping in mind that they have to be out and about since they have no classroom to congregate in,) it's probably safe to assume that many of the previous Death students were successfully deterred. I can't imagine Malorn sees much traffic anymore.

Even after the Death School is found by the Wizard and classes are said to resume, (even though the connection to Nightside is unstable? Eh, anyway,) Malorn is never seen outside of his usual spot. He literally cannot go to class anymore because he's too busy being Acting Professor. He now has to stand there in his usual spot, directing students to the actual Death School. (Because no one can put the building back, I guess. -_-)

And Malorn isn't even recognized for his hard work, either! Despite always being as helpful and friendly as possible, doing a pretty great job at being Acting Professor (if you ask me), he's never rewarded. The Wizard graduates, and Dwargyn is promoted to Death Professor. AND MALORN STILL HAS TO JUST STAND THERE!

Though, that also calls into question whether or not he actively wanted the role of Acting Professor or not. Sure, he's great at it, and yeah, he makes the most with what he can. But is he Acting Professor because he genuinely wanted to take up that mantle, or is he Acting Professor because he was the best of the Death students at the time? (I mean, I imagine it's because he wanted to, but we technically don't know for certain.)

Last but not least, no one likes the Death School kids. Both in old and new lore, some of the kids express how creepy the Death School is to them. They think the Death students are weird and freaky. The kids are ostracized by the rest of the Ravenwood student body simply because necromancy gives them the heebie-jeebies. So for Malorn to be stuck in Ravenwood, all day every day, surrounded by people who other him and look down on him not only because he's a necromancer, but because (I imagine) some of the kids would see his title of Acting Professor as him "sucking up to Ambros" or "thinking he's as great as Malistaire was" or "looking down on other regular students" or any other number of uncharitable assumptions. It would be hard for anyone to handle that kind of treatment for an extended period of time, including Malorn.

Malorn probably feels an immense amount of pressure from everyone's expectations of him as a Death student, an honor student, and as Acting Professor. Even though there's nothing for him to do most of the time, he still has to do it perfectly. He can't afford to fail his classmates. His friends. He's now in charge of their education, so if they fall behind, he'll be the one to blame. He has to show Ambros that Death is still worth studying, even if Malistaire might be gone. He can't make the Death School seem weak in the eyes of the other students by slacking off or being inhospitable. So he keeps a smile on his face as he stands by himself, forced to play Professor without ever getting the recognition or power of one, all while still being a student actively in school, unable to grow and get stronger with his peers due to being secluded and forbidden to leave.

"Acting Professor Ashthorn" isn't even a Professor. He's just a lonely school boy, trying to do his best, yet always coming up short.

It's sad.

[milgram-tournament]

MILGRAM Best Song Tournament, Round 1, Match 4 HALF vs. MAGIC

Propaganda for both options under the cut!

Propaganda for HALF:

kazui may just be an old gay man but HE CAN SING.

its. literally stunning.

like aside from his character and everything else, half is just really really beautifully written

THE INSTRUMENTALS.

HIS V O I C E??? its so pretty

heartbreaking lyrics. i dont love kazui as a character but i have bawled to half

GAY RIGHTS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Love amane but she will undoubtedly win when her purge march poll rolls around, so lets let the old man have a win shall we?

---

half propaganda let's goooo sorry i'm sobern't in true kazui style so this probably won't make a bit of sense

theatre kid man. i love him, incredible mv.

this song is pure ASMR to me

visually aligned with Cat and it's so lovely to see that continuity

the GRAINY MOVIE DOTS THING ON THE MV <3

kazui is so dramatic. i love him i love him

dapper gentleman. such clothes

the key change is so well done

AND THE . THE PART WITH THE. THE ENDING SORT OF LYRICS OVERLAID WITH SPEAKING. and then his quieter singing and, and, and o h my god. im sorry. im not very coherent abt this rn

every part of the song is amazing but once it gets to the key change and after it keeps stepping up the amount of being perfect

kazui is in it

um

kazui is in it

go my psionic warriors vote for everyone's favourite failhusband

no children were tortured in the making of this MV (cough looking at You magic)

---

Allow me to present my Half propaganda!

- The slower tempo adds a very relaxing feeling to the song. Kinda ironic, but I like it! It sort of reminds of old indie songs from 2012 (especially with what I think is whistling added in the instrumental in-between chorus and verses.)

- Kazui’s voice. Enough said.

- It’s very easy to listen to, and I find it’s one of the only songs from Milgram that I like to listen to out of context (besides After Pain, Backdraft, and Purge March, oddly enough.)

- The MV is rife with imagery, and is used to beautiful effect. It really makes you feel for Kazui and his situation.

- The scene with him and Hinako before the key change… that makes me so emo.

- The overlapping part at the end… the lyrics combined with the dialogue in the background makes me really sad in a way I can’t explain.

Propaganda for MAGIC:

MAGIC MY BELOVED MAGIC!!! Its one of the best MVs in the entire series, even including T2. Magic is visually stunning and has some fantastic art direction but also is very clever in how it conveys its themes and ideas. Magic doesn't really hide anything from you, not really. It's all symbolic but it Tells You Things. It shows you the abuse, it shows you the cat. There's a fun little relationship going on here where, In Magic. Amane's pain and suffering isn't taken seriously by the people around her and the Audience we are discouraged to take it at face value due to the fictionalized nature of Magic. It's so cool. I'm so fond of the song as well, it's one of the best in the series purely cause of the Layers in it. The implications of this Inability to be good is seeped into Magic. Amane knows this isn't reality, Magic knows it's a show, she watches it at the end. And it's so Sad to me that even in her fictionalized happy world she Cannot be a good girl. It's a standard completely out of reach for her and that idea is just conveyed so well visually.

Im not even talking about the goddamn cat yet- the cat symbolism goes Deep. That cat is HER it has the same wounds Amane has in Purge March. I- I cant talk about the intertextuality of Purge March and Magic here this is Magic propaganda only- I- there's so much good stuff to Magic. I Re watched it over and over again. It has some the Best Writing and Visual Communication in Milgram and I will Die on this Hill.

---

shoutout to magic for having pretty props AND being vague as fuck about the crime! diversity win!

seriously though amane looks SO cute in it! the mv has such a pretty and colorful style and even with that it's able to show the horrors of what amane went through.

adding onto my last point. that scene where the cat is hyperventilating and you see the camera shaking???? that scene where the mascots find amane helping the cat and they're all standing over her? CHILLS. im repeating myself but the fact that they were able to portray the awful things amane went through in a genuinely emotional way while still keeping the cute cartoon look is soo impressive

there are SO many layers to itill the entire cartoony style making it look like a tv show… utilizing the cartoony effects and bright colors to show amane downplaying her own pain… the transformation after she gets punished barely changing anything to show just how manipulated she was from the start… ueueueue

ALSO ALSO ALSO THE SCENE AT THE END WITH AMANE STARING AT THE SCENE? OHHH ITS SO GOOD it adds such a feeling of dread and reminds you on top of this whole thing that all of this is truly horrifying! something is going on here!

this song is so catchy it gets stuck in my head CONSTANTLY

"Dear wise one, Am I worthy? Is it ok to spoil myself?" AMANE... UEUEUUEUE

the little ding sound effects in the instrumental?????

amanes voice is ADORABLE

THE INSTRUMENTAL IN THAT PART WHERE SHES HELPING THE CAT HAS THAT GODLY TYPE SOUND YOUD TYPICALLY ASSOCIATE WITH CHURCHES AND STUFF AND I DONT KNOW HOW TO EXPLAIN IT PROPERLY BUT JUST RELISTEN TO IT AND YOU WILL KNOW WHAT I MEAN. ITS SUCH A NEAT DETAIL

i could go on about this mv for days but i am not a theorist unfortunately. just. magic sweep

[skitskatdacat63]

The frustrating thing about creating is the realization that I'm never going to be able to completely fulfill all my desires. On one hand, that means eternal motivation, but on the other, eternal unsatisfaction. I've had my ocs and au for 7+ years, and I still don't feel anywhere close to feeling fulfilled, though part of that is me getting in my own way. The worst is that that lack of fulfillment scares me away from y'know, actually making steps to fulfill myself. It is an annoying cycle 😞

Create something -> feel proud! -> think about the vast amount of things I *haven't* made(yet?) -> feel hopeless -> refrain from creating for a period of time out of shame. Repeat.

I guess I hate that I am often my own worst enemy. That the feeling of "wow I haven't made nearly as much as I want to" doesn't motivate me, but rather discourages me. I wish I could use all this time I spend commiserating with myself to instead actually create. But alas. Mostly. I often say, oh I want to write this, or oh I want to draw this! And I do! But I scare myself out of doing it, and I hate that. People encourage me, and I really appreciate that, but at the end of the day, it'll always be me who is my worst enemy. It's so fucking irritating. I feel so joyful and passionate about the ideas I have, but often can't even start them because I can't resist the devil on my shoulder whos saying, "yeah, but that's so little, why even make it at that point." UGH.

Anyhow. Ignore me, I like to psychoanalyze myself. I know I'll get out of this rut, I just feel shameful rn. But it feels relieving I guess to write it out like this. So maybe I should go actually write :)

[specialgradefckr]

Heyyo! I'm usually just a lurker, but your Heatwave series has been absolutely incredible and I had to write in. I'm not usually an ABO fan, but you are rapidly changing my mind. Started with the Yuuta/Rika piece and loved your characterization of that sad eyed dude. Sweet and mostly passive while also being fully aware of reader-chan's BS.

Day 4 tho??? 🥵🔥🥵 I'm a more recent Gojo convert and oh my stars, "...you think for a moment he sounds like a dog toy. You think you want to make him your dog toy." Arrogant, but also whiney and pathetic Gojo really hits for me. The Pining? Phenomenal.

Just wanted to gas you up a bit and let you know what an excellent writer you are. Totally looking forward to the rest of the Heatwave series and whatever else your big brain cooks up in the future! 😊

wanted to gas you up a bit

awwhhhhHHh THANK YOUUUU 🥺 i super appreciate it!!!

honestly i started this blog recently and i've been trying not to compare the numbers but sometimes i get discouraged, you know? like, i AM doing it for the art (i knew day 3 was not gonna get a lot of love) but i'm posting it bc it makes me happy to see people enjoying it.

it's super encouraging to hear from you (and all the others who leave comments or reblog etc.) that my work is doing well.

i'm trying to be more critical of my own writing, fix things i don't like about it, and sometimes i need a reminder that it's still worthwhile and enjoyable to read even when i feel like it could have been better.

I've been writing like? All 10 of the Heatwave prompts concurrently, and while it means I have all of them drafted and partly written rn, it also means I switch between them a lot.

Inevitably I start to kinda. Lose the plot sometimes of a scene I'm trying to write skdfhglsdhg like the intro to the Yuta fic was SOOOO long actually and it was rambling about social phenomena with alphas, basically the omegaverse version of red pill dudes LMAOOO

and that was also supposed to lead in to like. the idea of what a REAL alpha is. the non-gendered values of leadership, protectiveness, and actually being sensitive to the thoughts and feelings of people around them (a crucial trait for someone in a leadership position).

and yuta fits those things SO WELL. he is CONSTANTLY worried about the people around them, how they feel and what they think. he admires the shit out of his classmates who like, tried to attack him when they first met fghskjdfgh. he wants to protect them but he never looks down on them.

later in the manga we see that yuta's consideration and empathy isn't just for his classmates. he cares a lot even for people who are very capable of protecting themselves - he cares about their feelings.

so i just knew like. yuta and tsundere reader. yuta who can see though your fussiness because he's always been perceptive.

yuta who thinks you're hot bc he has a constant boner for strong women but also has a deep yearning to see you be honest and vulnerable with him, and goes feral for it.

yuta who you can be vulnerable with because you know him and his gentle smile, his kind words, how he looks up to you even though he's a special grade and stronger than you'll ever be,, hhhh....

but yeah anyways. *grasps you and shakes you by the shoulder* GOJO. GOJO SATORU BEING HIS PATHETIC NEEDY SELF. GOJO BEING YOUR SQUEAKY TOY AND LOVING EVERY SECOND OF IT -

tmi but "fuck me until i sound like a dog toy" is actually something a previous partner said to me??? i've never been much of a top but hearing that just kinda had me... hsdfgjhdsg HHHHHH

i think a major part of gojo's appeal is how he can be arrogant and pretty AND sultry all at once. there's something utterly delicious about a slutty confident man who is also crying screaming throwing up for you to let him put it in you skdhflsdhg

next heatwave fic is sdkfgsdlhgshg uhhhHHhh different from the ones you have read, it's a yandere piece with gojo and geto.

After that it's another gojo piece i think you'll REALLY like >.> masochist!gojo is a favorite headcanon of mine and i was actually super hyped writing some of the smut there so far hehe.

glad you've enjoyed so far! more to come for sure ;)

[nyamcattt]

Omg I love your art so much I'm more of a proof and numbers person so I really struggle with the freedom of art when I try to make it any tips you can give me pretty please?

omg thank you??!? 😳

hmmm i'm assuming you meant numbers like, social media numbers? it's hard to deal with that in this current state of the internet, especially when you want to pursue art professionally the non traditional way, or to use online space to get to the traditional routes. the creative industry is a bit cooked rn.

i gotta admit it was easier when i was pursuing a different career and my income didn't hinge on how my art is doing online!! you just draw for yourself and draw whatever you like.

it's in the name itself, when it comes to freedom of art, you gotta let it go wild, be free, experiment with medium, try new compositions, new concepts, try what the others are doing, put random things together, they don't even have to make sense or have a specific meaning. but of course it won't always do well, especially when it comes to "proof" or "numbers".

you can chase numbers. however, you won't grow as an artist if you don't get out of your comfort zone, or out of what is liked and expected from you. professionals who are hiring artists want to see fresh and unique work.

it's easy to say "don't worry about what others think" but the reality is, to make it out there, you need an audience, and a substantial amount of people have to like your work for your to take off and reach the right people.

my tip is try to find balance. try pushing yourself to try something new in one or two aspects of your drawing. let's say you know people would like the piece if you draw a fanart, or from a art challenge, then try something new in other aspects of it, maybe try a new color palette, experiment with brush and textures, try different angles, lightings, style, add your own twist to the concept, etc. whatever it is, push yourself to try something new, one at a time.

MOST IMPORTANTLY THOUGH, remember and internalize this: this silly social media numbers game is not indicative of the quality of your work. these numbers depend on so many factors, while skill and ideas are part of them, there are also networking, marketing, presentation, consistency, and lots of LUCK.

so if a piece you're proud of "flops" don't nitpick it, don't be scared to do it again. it's discouraging, yes, but your overall growth as an artist is more important than just online numbers in the long run. others might not see it instantly, but if you are proud of it, that means you are going into the right direction!

[tbhimnoteasyonmyself]

15 Day BL Challenge - DAY 30

Hello~~ We made it to a month, everybody! Let's celebrate 🥳🥳

Top 3 Shows to Introduce People to BL

From bottom to top, as usual, guys.

Number 3: Not Me

Is it a BL? Technically, yes. The main characters are men who do eventually make a queer couple. Is it the main point of this story? Not even close. It's much more about literally everything else (and it fucking slaps there).

Not Me, I think, it's good for ppl who don't know its workings to get accustomed to some clichés in BL, like, just to list a few:

Enemies to Lovers;

Weirdly Agressive Tops;

Infantilized Bottoms;

"I Don't Like Men, I Like Him";

Biker Bisexuals (not just Sean but also White bc he DOES start the series with a whole-ass gf, let's not forget. also Black if you analyse the homoerotic relationship he has with Todd [which, in my opinion, is pretty fucking hard to miss]);

Nearly Women-less Worlds;

Taking Care of Each Other's Wounds...

While, at the same time, not being an extremely couple-centric story. So it gives ppl some opening to explore the world without being too overwhelmed.

On the other hand, I do think the main couple is extremely underdeveloped and that can be pretty discouraging. Both in my 1st watch alone and the 2nd I'm doing rn with some friends it's striking how SeanWhite just kinda fucking happens and no one really gets why or how. They only get in each other's way then they suddenly attend a pride demonstration together, Sean decides to tell White his traumas and suddenly they're fucking in a tent in an abandoned building. Kinda out of nowhere.

For that reason it only gets 3rd place.

Number 2: Bad Buddy

It is such a breezy ride you forget Pat gets shot and almost charged with firearm possession at a certain point.

For that reason, I think it's a nice way to ease ppl into the genre.

Plus Ohm and Nanon served some of the best acting and chemistry in the industry it really translates well to the viewer.

I do think, though, that some of its better points might be lost on newbies. For nothing else but the fact it plays around a lot of the clichés we normally see around these parts and, if you're unfamiliar with them, the play and criticism might pass you by.

Hence: 2nd place.

Number 1: Moonlight Chicken

It's one of my absolute all-time favourite series. And it's for a reason.

Most of the clichés don't really happen. And when they do (like the love triangle and the ex from hell tropes), they're explored in such a different light that it feels natural that they're there and I'm not even upset.

If you want someone to get into this craziness, you have to start by showing them the best this store has to offer. That's it.

Plus it's shorter than usual so it's good for beginners in that aspect as well.

All wins.

[olive-pit123]

feeling really discouraged rn, when I was in high school I had an internship at a local ceramics studio that doubled as an art therapy practice but I stopped showing up and ghosted my mentor because I was in the process of transitioning out of an abusive home to living with my grandparents. I've always had regrets about how that ended and now that it's my senior year and I'm in need of experience in my field of interest I messaged my old mentor explaining where I was at, asking her to give me a second chance, and was extremely vulnerable in telling her the truth as to why I stopped coming. She left me on read. Even though it was nearly 7 years ago I am just heartbroken she wouldn't even give me a one word response. so disheartened, she was the inspiration for everything I want to do in life.

[polyamorousmood]

Hey, it's 🫀!!

I am having such a great time with my bf and my metamour (that's what you call someone your partner is dating but you two aren't, right?) and I just thought I'd give an update :)

My bf and I are hanging out all the time and he got so excited that I got along with his gf. She and I have a lot of shared interests, and we both rly care about our bf so we have this understanding of each other that I think is hard to come by.

We were making jokes about all living in one really big house with all of our cool stuff plastered all over the walls so it was like one giant fusion of all of our identities and interests. It's kind of an ongoing joke for us and since I'm an artist I draw a lot of comics about it.

Also, I've heard that jealousy is something that people in polycules can experience a lot regarding their partners and the divided attention, and while I don't feel that right now, in case I do what tips do you have to deal with it?

Anyway that's all I have to say rn so have a lovely day/night :)

-🫀

Queued this up!

Hi 🫀!! its good to hear from you again! Glad things are still going well 🥰

You used metamour correctly, and how great it is to have one you really like. Be careful what you joke, it just may happen 😜

I talk about how to address jealousy in this ask and there's a lot more relevant advice here as well, so start with those. Seriously. Stop reading this and go read those. Look I'm even putting in a read more to further discourage you from reading this without reading those. You have to click something anyway so just click those first. ✌️

Okay so its SUPER nice you're not having any jealousy yet, 🫀, hell yeah! Also like, major vote of confidence that polyamory is for you. I do have some jealousy (though of course still worth and I think a lot less than mono people!). One of the big things for me I realized is that I need to have a relationship of my own -- usually a platonic one -- with my metamour outside of just third wheeling on my partner's hangouts with them. Last metamour, as soon as I went out to lunch🍽️ with them -- just the two of us -- everything immediately felt better and more natural 🌿

I think with everything going so well and you feeling so good about hanging out all together, you're probably not going to have a lot of problems with it. If you do have anything, I think its most likely to be one thing in particular just striking 🎳 a nerve with you? So you know, if there's anything that you catch yourself conceptualizing as ✨special✨ and just for you and your partner, make sure all relevant parties are clear on that.

Other than that I think the biggest thing is going to be keeping lines of communication clear. Make a point to comment on how things make you feel, even if it just feels nice or neutral. Being in the practice will prevent it feeling weird if you have to comment on something later for your sanity🧠. I think you have a really good set up though, 🫀! Its literally the dream scenario for a lot of poly people. Your partner better appreciate you and your meta both!! 😜As always, keep me posted!! Your messages make my day every time I get them

[b1rdbra1ned]

Oh no I hate Fan too. Fan was not a good character in season 2 and he didn't actually face any consequences for his actions. Paintbrush was like the closest we got to Fan being criticised and people considered PB to be the one overreacting. Paintbrush is done so dirty because the fandom put their own belief about the bright lights being family even though Paintbrush never actually got along with them. They talked to tt like once, bickered with lb until the last ep they were in and then there's. Fan..

Also I think I hate fantube a little more after the theyrebasicallycanon polls put enstars against ii. Glad rinniki won they deserve the win against fantube imo.

Sorry I was tired of being critical of ii so I don't like it anymore 😔

But hiiii we haven't talked much in a while ik :(( I'm on holiday rn but feel free to talk to me if you want!

ALLLL OF THIS

Paintbrush was in every way in the right to yell at fan, he constantly bothered and nagged at them and the stuff about marshmallow was definitely the final straw

i only ever liked the whole bright lights family thing because honestly it could’ve worked imo!!! but they just never took that chance they never really developed the brights lights AT ALL most season (beside from marshmallow) the bright light felt more like the comical team (not really but can’t think of a better way to describe them) compared to the grand slams who definitely got way more focus and development

it’s shitty because i think the brights lights could’ve had potential but they were just casted aside until the last few episodes where “oh hey look development!! :] oh wait nvm they’re eliminated now <3” like ????

paintbrush definitely got the short end of the stick here. literally having what was supposed to be their episode mainly centred around tt and lb and having their feelings about marsh being completely casted aside. i wish more was done w/ marshmallow and them vs them and lb

looking back a lot of their scenes w lb just felt kinda off??? i don’t think can articulate this probably rn but paintbrush deserved better

but at the same time i wish the team got more time w/ each other in general, they have so many great opportunities to do it like in the maze episodes but again they’re kinda just cast aside as just comedy

and w/ s3 oh boy i hate what they did with paintbrush and their “arc” in the last few episodes. they quite literally and figuratively took away their edges, i miss sassy, sarcastic confident paintbrush they feel so dulled down in iii and it’s like no one in the writing team understands them at all. it’s like they didn’t even write s2 (but hey back to the point i mentions last post that show writers really ought to stop listening to fans sometimes because this is how fanon seeps in </3)

i hate how the a lot of the fans view paintbrush especially if it’s only ever in the context of lightbrush or shipping (another thing that pisses me off btw is how they’re always treated as irrational and or just plain out abusive FUCK PEOPLE WHO PORTRAY PAINTBRUSH LIKE THIS)

they’re such a great character who gets absolutely fucked over by the writing and fandom (not all of the fandom of course, i love seeing ppls takes and discussions on them but it’s just some fans who just </3)

i don’t like discouraging ships, if ppl are mature and respectful and don’t put other ppl down then that’s all great and stuff but my problem is that i really wish paintbrush was just seen as more than their ships yknow

Fan is.. the more i think about canon him the more im like yeaaa… uh no thanks…. (mainly w/ him and paintbrush and cabby)

idk if im even allowed to say they changed tt this season because.. she didn’t honestly have a lot of screentime last season compared to a whole lot of other characters, but in iii she feels off?? honestly all of them do even the new contestants later on during the season

idk if i have the words to describe why s3’s characterisation is so off and at time frustrating, their arcs too, was going to point out some characters but honestly i could make a case for nearly ALL the contestants the ones who weren’t voted out early at least

that’s the end of my ramble tho, sorry ik i talked a lot about paintbrush, i want to talk about the others too but they’re the one i still even think about. hopefully this isn’t a bit hard to read, ik im not that organised w my rambles sometimes

[chahnniesroom]

HELLO AUTHOR NIM I absolutely love all of your works and I live for all of them <33

THE ANGST IN TENDERNESS MADE ME SCREAM AAAAAA my friends can testify how much I kept on ranting about it especially when chan was being an asshole that one chap >:( and of course the moments of fluff in between made me weak in the knees 😭

AND TILL DEATH DO US APART IS 💓💞💕💖♥️♥️💗 SO FLUFFY (except minho's fic) I LOVE READING THEM ALL hyunjin painting her a painting of their flowers even though he's busy AND THE "it's us" WBSOWNXOASON SO CUTE 😭😭 and seungmin picking her up and taking care of her 😭 sobbinh and there is the angst of the minho fic :( I loved it

I love how you write each fic and I'm so excited to read your next one, of course you can take your time writing each fic we'll all be waiting <33

anon-nim..... this is one of the nicest messages i have ever read,,,, i would do anything for you 🥹����

it's soo cute to hear that you talked to your friends about tenderness and i'm so glad you liked it and the rest of my fics!! it has been fun to try out different genres through the tddup collection and even more rewarding when i get such positive feedback. i really appeciate your detailed comment, no words can explain how nice it feels to receive such a heartfelt message 🥰🥰🥰

i have a lot of fics planned (like 5+ rn) but they will take time, thank you in advance for your patience!! for me, writing is a long process and my progress is often slow. taking so long to write can be discouraging, especially when i compare myself to other authors, but messages like yours really really motivate me and i am really grateful to have readers that enjoy what i create.

[everythingsinred]

For the writers ask: 2, 3, 4, 17

thank u for asking <3 <3 <3

2) What is your favorite fic of yours? i hope this isn't too much of a cop-out answer but my favorite fic is always the one i'm working on. a lot of love goes into each one and if i'm not fully enthralled in a story i'm writing i might as well not write it at all, imo. i'm particularly proud of atrad right now, because it took a long time, as well as lots of research and i really wanted it to be well-written. but rn, even though i'm on pause for a bit, subjectives is my fav bc it's the one i'm working on now.

3) What fic of yours do you think is underrated? it's hard to say when it comes to the ga fandom bc there's usually not as many readers at all, but i must say lack of interaction is what caused me to put not what we should be on the backburner for a few years. i fully intend to write all of it some day, but it is hard to get motivated when it's also a fic i've received negative comments on ;-;

(w the fandom that won't be named, i really liked writing trust, but it was seemingly less interesting to others so i abandoned it. rest in peace...)

4) What fic of yours were you surprised by how popular it was? i am always shocked when any of my fics get attention! my first ga fics in the internship universe on ffn got a lil bit of attention and i was genuinely surprised! but my g*th*am fic play dead getting as much attention as it did really shocked me, especially bc i was on twitter back then and i had plenty of mutuals who would "live tweet" reading whenever a new chapter came out, and it honestly felt so touching... the higher u fly, the more u have to fall and all that.

when it comes to ga, i had surrendered to having no attention especially more recently, but i think atrad got a decent amount of attention for how small the fandom is! and lots of ppl would comment and give me their thoughts which meant a lot too, and which i wasn't fully expecting!

17) Do you have any wips that you can tell us about? What are you most excited for in you wip?

obviously, i still have nwwsb, which someone asked abt recently! i'm very happy there's ppl out there who are interested in seeing it continue bc i am too <3 i'm thinking after subjectives, i'll probably continue nwwsb for a while (tho i had planned on it being rly long so i might get distracted by another project eventually before finishing it lmao)

i also wrote ~7 chapters of a zombie au a few years ago that i enjoyed but never posted bc pretty much all i saw on tumblr back then were ppl hating on zombie aus. i think i'd have to rewrite what i have though if i were to post it, which is why i'm not as excited about that project. i don't like restarting lol

and i also have a restaurant au i like, but it would likely not be quite as long as my other fics <3

and what i'm most excited abt is just sharing more fics for people to enjoy! i love writing natsumikan fanfic and giving as much as i can to this fandom and tho it seems to be in a constant state of shrinking, i won't let myself get too discouraged! thank u to all who read and enjoy my fics <3 i very much appreciate it!

send me a fic writing ask if you would like!

[unsettlingcreature]

man it just feels like i'm not going to be able to do anything. i draw and even though i'm really proud of it and my friends react, it gets zero likes online. i can't help but wonder huh maybe my friends are just placating me. maybe i'm so far gone in art degradation that i can't even see if something is good anymore.

ok so i go to try some gamedev stuff. i get an hour's worth of work done and then decide to look at what assets are available and everything that fits what i'm making is AI slop. well shit that's sad. but i won't let myself get discouraged and just do the background assets myself later on.

art as a whole is making me sad rn though so i'll go to coding side of it. i'll use this template to add- oh and its not working. i can't find why it's not working, the code looks correct, it's not an issue with the file name, path or extension. it's just not recognising it. i spent half an hour trying to find what's wrong and can't see anything. it just doesn't work despite being identical to the demo. literally copy and pasted.

and it's like wow. what can i even do with my life. i can feel myself spiralling but it's like what do i have to offer the world. i used to think it was art or storytelling but maybe i was just deluding myself and i have nothing. all my skills are mediocre at best, or at least not good enough to make something worth sharing. it's all the kind of good where it'll be put on the fridge and applauded by friends but to anyone else, it's slop. like what's the point in making anything anymore.