#even though I live in California where such an exchange is acceptable

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

my health teacher said its illegal to have sex underage (even if your partner is also your age), is that true?

hi anon,

obligatory disclaimer that I'm assuming this pertains to the United States of America; if you're not from the US then disregard all of this and also accept my apologies for only being familiar with the laws of the country where I live.

the short answer is "yes, but if that's all that your teacher told you then they're being a real shithead about it."

so in America we have a specific designation called "statutory rape" that covers any instance of unforced sexual activity with someone who is under the age of legal majority. this does, unfortunately, extend to instances of teenagers having consensual sex with each other, in much the same way that teenagers who have consensually exchanged nudes might be found guilty of owning and distributing child pornography since they are both legally underage.

obviously even our deeply broken legal system usually has better things to do than try to convict teenagers having consensual sex with each other, so much like jaywalking or pirating movies this is rarely treated as a crime even though it is one according to the letter of the law. accordingly, many places in the United States have "Rome and Juliet laws," which serve to mitigate the penalty for what would otherwise be statutory rape as long as the minors involved were all consenting participants and are close in age.

this isn't a perfect measure, and it also fails to completely account for all instances of consensual teenage sex. there's a rather famous case of a man in California who had consensual sex with his 17 year old girlfriend in 1989 when he was 19; her parents objected and he ultimately wound up charged as a sex offender. this would be egregious regardless, but it's worth noting that as far as I know he and his then-girlfriend have now been married for something like three decades while he's still on the sex offender registry for going down on her in '89.

which I hope serves as a great reminder to everyone to a.) think critically about the value of branding people as sex offenders and b.) the American legal system is a joke.

the point being, yes it's technically illegal in many parts of the US, but that's definitely not all there is to it and the actual law varies state to state.

[imaginespazzi]

Nivi – hey bestie, you’ve done it again – I wasn’t sure it could get more heartbreaking than the last one and yet!

As always, the writing is- well, it’s everything.

The parallels between high school them and college them was immaculate, and I so wish Paige could have fulfilled her dream of kissing Azzi under the confetti, but alas, maybe in another universe 😉

I loved the little exchange about UConn and California, and how that possibility was always there but Paige could just never accept it.

P and UConn winning the natty this year – it had to happen in at least one universe, so thank you for letting it happen in this one.

Side note: Drew and Paige interactions are always top tier, and very much the type of momentary fluff that I needed to break up the sadness while reading.

Side note 2: I love that I don’t even need to imagine what Azzi wearing Paige’s jersey would look like, but I’m glad ucla au Paige got to experience it too 🥹

The celebration with the team was so cute and of course it would be KK that basically helps break the ice (and her lil innocent “you should bring her around more often” 🥺). Also, all the little moments Az got with everyone else in the team was so wholesome, and ofc queen Nika being a loveable menace who’s always just looking out for her twin.

Side note 3: I love love love the two piggyback moments haha, just because that’s so pazzi core to me idk, I feel like there’s been a lot of photos where Azzi is piggybacking Paige irl, like that’s very much their thing so I adored seeing it incorporated here. But then, the ending. I knew it was coming, but it certainly did not make it hurt any less when we got there. “Fuck,” Paige’s voice is still wracked with sleep, “I thought you left.” “That’s more your style,” Azzi says – this was particularly heartbreaking, but I can’t really blame Azzi, even if P is trying so hard to make things right.

Overall, I may or may not have been tearing up throughout the entire chapter, and it somehow hit me even harder the second time I read through it? I think that’s just testament to your writing tbh.

Thoughts on what’s next:

Do things finally start getting better? It can’t get any worse, can it? (famous last words) 😅

I did wonder actually, whether you’d have them win or lose the natty, only because if they did win which obviously they did here (thank you), could that maybe change P’s mind at all on declaring or not?

I’m guessing she obviously sticks to her og decision and stays, and so I’m super intrigued on what might come next for them.

Like will they try going back to being just friends? Even though they’ve already tried and failed and knowing that would never be enough for Paige. But can they really not be in each other’s lives??

Will they try seeing other people again??

Summer’s coming up in the timeline and they’ve never spent an entire summer apart, so what will they do this summer? 😔 Or will we have a big time jump?

So many questions, and only you have the answers, Nivi.

Favourite lines/quotes:

The moon shines against Azzi’s face and Paige thinks that so much has changed, but Azzi’s still that kind of beautiful

“Do you know what my answer would have been?” “Yeah,” Azzi says softly, squeezing her hands, “yeah I do.”

Alternate lyrics that came to mind while reading:

Talk about our future like we had a clue. Never planned that one day, I'd be losing you.

In another life, I would be your girl. We'd keep all our promises, be us against the world.

Oh, and in honour of your love for Taylor, a Taylor lyric that came to mind was specifically this:

And I can go anywhere I want. Anywhere I want, just not home - mainly from the perspective of Paige getting almost everything she’s ever wanted, except the thing she wants most.

PS: I don’t really listen to Taylor’s music much anymore (nothing negative, just a shift in my music tastes these past couple of years!), but if there’s anything you think I should definitely give a listen to from her latest album, let me know!

As always, thank you for all you do for us. Have a wonderful weekend 💗

Much love, -🙋‍♀️

Hi bestie, one thing about me is that I will find a way to make it worse! 🤪

Thank you my sweets, it always means the world <3

I'm glad you caught that because I wanted to hint at the idea that it wasn't just a random decision of Azzi's part to choose UCLA and that she'd always been considering it.

If I can add Drew and Paige interactions, best believe I will find a way to do it. That's another relationship that's so precious to me.

Shoutout to the one anon who asked for Azzi to wear Paige's jersey in the universe as well because I took that and ran with it so I hope they liked it, because I liked their idea (come say hi!)

The team scene was one my favorites to write honestly, especially just in general KK is so fun to write because she's so fun and I need my chaotic family (Paige-Azzi-KK-Ice) to be a thing in every universe.

YES the piggybacks are just so Pazzi-core and I know this is an au but I like to take things from what we already know about them and just tweak it to keep some semblance of realism. Also piggyback are just really cute and Paige seems like the kind to beg literally anyone to carry her anyways

Things will get better because I actually don't know if they can get worse (actually they probably could but it might be hard to come back from lol) but things getting better is gonna take a lot

See if Paige changes her mind and declares, things become easy for them with her going to LA and I'm not in the business of making things easy for them lol

You think I have the answer to these question but truly what I write is just as much a mystery of where my inspiration will take to me as it is to you. So we'll see but we're on the ascent upwards, so no more other people lol!

I LOVE THE ONE THAT GOT AWAY SO MUCH!!

As for Taylor, the new album's pretty good babes if you wanna go listen! Lowkey a lot of the songs work pretty well with this fic lmao. But my favorites are loml and Fortnight I think.

Always love your detailed takes on the new parts and just seeing you in my inbox always makes me smile <3

[usafphantom2]

SAC Crew Dogs: How I Ended Up at Loring AFB, ME

Learning the Loring Shuffle, Check. Seeing -40F, Check. Wear shorts in the spring when the temp was only +40F, Check. Finding out what a Black Fly was, Check. See a moose, Check. See a bear, Check!

We used to say, “What are you going to do? Take away my Birthday? Put me on Alert? Send me to Loring? Sorry, been there, done that, got the T-Shirt!

As a SAC Boom Operator in training, they asked me to list, in order of preference, what bases I would like to be stationed at. They called it the Dream Sheet. You could choose any base you wanted, but they would still send you where people were needed. There really wasn’t much you could do about it, except to lean into it and accept the fact that you were probably going somewhere you normally wouldn’t choose.

I decided to short circuit the system by just choosing the base I figured they’d send me to anyways. I just put Loring AFB at the top. My motto at the time was, “Low expectations will get you everywhere.” It worked too. I knew it would be a terrible place to live, because everybody told me so, but it was only a ten-hour drive from home, so visiting home would be easy and not too expensive.

Of my initial training class of twelve, three of us went to Loring, and the fourth showed up a year later. Leaving California, I drove cross country, stopped at home for some leave time, and I arrived at Loring in December, just in time for the fun.

So, what was I in store for? A lot. I was told once that Loring receives around two hundred inches of snow per year and I have no idea if that number’s accurate, but I do know they get a lot of snow there. The temperatures would drop, and the wind would howl. The plows created monstrous piles of snow that were easily thirty feet tall. Streets became like tunnels due to the snow piled up on the sides.

The parking lot at the Base Exchange (BX) has a very slight slope to it, and in the winter, any slope was something to view with caution, because there was always ice and snow everywhere. Everybody learned to walk in such a way as to not fall and it was called the Loring Shuffle. It wasn’t anything special, you just kind of shuffled along (not to get into politics, but kind of like how our current fearless leader walks.)

I was driving in the BX parking lot, and I saw somebody walking around the back of their car to head into the store, and they had obviously forgotten they were at Loring in the winter, and just a like a cartoon, I saw this person slip, go completely horizontal, hang in the air for a moment, and then fall to the ground, in a very painful way. I couldn’t help it, even though I knew it could and would happen to me, I remember laughing and thinking “Dumb *ss.”

The temperatures could drop very low at times and once, while I was doing a mid-tour Alert changeover, I had to head out to the airplane by myself, at night, when the temperature was -40 ambient, and -80 with the wind chill. For some reason, I didn’t have my heavy gloves with me, so I put on my flight gloves. I got out of the truck and went to the airplane, opened the door, installed the ladder, climbed up, then found my bag, grabbed and reversed course to get back to the truck. The total time outside, maybe three or four minutes, but when I took my nomex gloves off, my hands were white, like they’d been freeze-dried.

When it got colder, down below 15 degrees, it didn’t normally snow. It was too cold. On one of these very cold nights, we were at the NCO Club, and when they finally kicked us out and we went outside, the snow was at least knee deep, but it wasn’t normal snow. When you attempted to walk on it, it just moved out of the way, like fog. The snowflakes were two inches wide and were super lightweight. You could have plowed with a leaf blower. I’ve never seen anything like it since.

Once the ground froze solid and was covered with a solid base of snow, you wouldn’t see it again until late spring. They had a lot of four-way stop signs because it was very common for people to slide through the intersection. You’d hear the horn, and watch somebody slide right through and think, “Dumb *ss, must have just gotten here.” But it wasn’t just the noobs who would slide through stop signs. Sometime, the polished ice before the stop sign would be fifty yards long and if you were going more than five miles per hour, you were going through.

They didn’t use salt on the roads. Too cold, but they did use sand and that would help. And when it got really cold, the snow would get crunchy and you actually had good traction in a car, or when walking (as long as you didn’t hit a patch of ice.)

Of the three of us that showed up together, one of my buddies had purchased a 4-wheel drive Chevy S-10 and when we had snowstorms, if we weren’t busy, the three of us would hop in his truck and head out to see what was going on. It was probably a foolish thing to do, like a Hurricane Party, but we did it often (there were lots of blizzards) and we always had a blast. We usually got stuck once or twice and just dug ourselves out and continued. We had a lot of fun doing that.

As you would expect, snowmobiles were a big thing. I bought one and had a lot of fun with it. They had groomed paths that were like roads. Rumor had it that if you crossed over into Canada, they could take to snowmobile trails all the way to the west coast. In Maine though, there were no speed limits, no helmet laws, and no drinking while sledding laws, and we took advantage. A typical trip involved heading out to a local lake, visiting a restaurant to warm up and have a beer, and then head out to the next lake, which would have its own restaurant. You did have to be careful on the lakes because they would get frost heaves, where the ice would shift and rise, sometimes up to a foot. If you were unlucky enough to be headed in the wrong direction it was like hitting a brick wall, and we had a few people who were injured that way.

If you were to think of any normal task you do and think about how long it took to do, at Loring in the winter it would take at least twice as long. The car had to be warmed up, if it started. Walking to your car took longer because you didn’t want to end up on your *ss. Pushing a shopping cart full of groceries to your car? Yeah, fat chance, better drive up to the door. Same thing on the airplane too. Getting to the airplane, warming up the airplane, doing the pre-flight, all those things took much longer to do, and it made a difference.

During the winter, the roads covered with snow would naturally be straightened out by the drivers. When spring came along, it was like everything moved. You couldn’t cut the corners off of curves anymore because if you tried to drive over the grass, you’d sink into the mud. When the rivers started to thaw, ice flows were always in danger of getting blocked and causing severe flooding. Overflowing rivers with huge chunks of ice weighing many tons were extremely destructive and had no problem tearing down bridges, houses, or anything else that got in their way.

When the temperatures got into the 40s and 50s it felt so warm, people would wear shorts. I know, crazy right, but it really did feel warm. And then… the black flies appeared. Those little bastards would bite you, but you wouldn’t feel it, until you felt the blood running along your skin. They were very small, and the bites didn’t hurt, but they were relentless. We called the Black Fly the Maine State Bird.

The cold weather, long hours of darkness in winter, and the isolation had another side effect though. People would hang out together. The boom operators would hang out together often, not just the single guys, but the married ones too. We were drawn together by the circumstances, and we got to know each other. The squadrons were closer too. We always had something to share because we were all stuck and if nothing else, you could always talk about the weather.

For all the suffering the weather created, going to Loring AFB was probably one of the best decisions I’ve made in my entire life.

Photos:

My 67 Mustang frozen solid

My buddy’s truck, spinning all four wheels on the ice

The runway and main taxi way at Loring in the winter

@tcamp202 via X

[j4m3s-b4k3r]

the rude roommate

There’s a presence following us everywhere. Insinuating itself into our lives, as we enjoy movies, TV shows and music. This rude roommate not only lives with us, but follows us to school, to work and everywhere else that we go, constantly blathering to wear us down. Posing as an indulgent pal, it offers tasty treats, with “go on, you’re worth it!” encouragements. Then, morphing into the concerned friend, it chides us “you’re getting some love handles there, buddy!” and pushes snake oil for that too. Yes, I’m talking about the shifting personas of ADVERTISING. 

You don’t truly notice the ever-present & manipulative jibber jabber of advertising till it’s not a part of your life. It’s like cigarette smoking in this. I was raised by on-again-off-again smokers, and for many years worked in offices permeated by ever present cigarette smoke. Soaking in it everywhere for my entire life, it was only upon moving to California (where it’d just been banned) that I truly became aware of smoking. After living smoke-free, I couldn’t believe the stench when visiting places that still allowed it in communal spaces. My own hair & clothes reeked of it, even though I didn’t smoke myself. Bleurgh!

Likewise, after soaking in advertising my entire life, I’ve only recently lived in a (relatively) ad-free bubble, enjoying media streaming services at home for the last few years. We just watched a movie in a cinema for the first time since 2019. Tickets were almost 20 dollars each for comfortable reserved seating in a beautiful theatre. Then we had to endure 30 minutes of constant advertising blather before the film. Not movie trailers mind you, but ads for clothes, soft drinks and so on. After living ad-free, this was excruciating, and eye-opening. Absence had not made my heart grow fonder. Quite the opposite.

The deal used to be that we tolerated the buzz of ads - like blowflies at a picnic - in exchange for free movies & music (on radio & TV). Nowadays, I pay extra for the ad-free option with entertainment media. Which is a blackmail shakedown - “Pay us, or you have to watch another incontinence commercial” - but at least I understand the terms of that arrangement. I don’t understand (or accept) any deal where I pay AND get ads too (which is why I didn’t have cable TV for very long). If theatres want us to come back en masse after the stay-at-home-years of covid, then making the experience special is key. For me, paying premium prices to watch Madison Avenue Punch & Judy shows is an absolute no no. 

Advertising is RUDE. The constant interruptions are simply annoying, but the purpose of the messages is insidious. In our real lives we are wary of people who constantly broadcast their own PR, because they’re trying to manipulate our perceptions of them. We must be on extra high alert for those who tell us what we are, because they’re trying to manipulate our own perceptions of ourselves.These are the goals of advertising’s trillion dollar industry. It is a nonstop psyop, fanning our hopes and inflaming our insecurities for profit.

“The spectacle of advertising creates images of false beauty so suave and so impossible to attain that you will hurt inside and never even know where the hurt comes from.” - Robert Montgomery

Ever since humans first gathered around fires and hearths, we’ve related to each other via stories. Stories are ‘lies’, in that many of them are 100% made up, but we know that and sharing them is fun. Besides, there may actually be a truth within the story. A parable. However, the human love of stories makes us vulnerable to manipulation by stories too. This is well known on Madison Avenue. Advertising subverts the parable, where the parable’s ‘moral’ has been substituted with a plug for Brand-X. 

It used to be that everyone was served the exact same ads at the same time, but we now live in the era of micro-targeted advertising. After sneakily looking through our private data, the rude roommate can now identify & hammer on each of our specific ‘problem areas’. Despite my attempts at internet ad-blocking, the rude roommate has a fairly accurate demographic profile of me, and websites I visit now display ads of male middle aged losers, worried about their dicks, bald spots, love handles & baggy eyes. The rude roommate has custom-curated these parables just for moi. If advertising was indeed your roommate, an actual person, they’d be the worst person you know. A passive aggressive, gaslighting master manipulator, and the last person you’d want constantly whispering in your ear. 

“People are taking the piss out of you everyday. They butt into your life, take a cheap shot at you and then disappear. They leer at you from tall buildings and make you feel small. — They have access to the most sophisticated technology the world has ever seen and they bully you with it. They are The Advertisers and they are laughing at you.” - Banksy

 “Narrative” has become a buzz word, and Hollywood folk (including story artists) now give story seminars to big companies. Wall Street, Langley, & Silicon Valley understand the appeal of storytelling, and Washington & Whitehall both use Spin Doctors to “get ahead of the story" and "control the narrative". The NSA & CIA know a little about narrative manipulation too, and even they are wary of internet advertising propaganda, and use ad-blocking software. Takes one to know one, right? Speaking of that, my own growing allergy to advertising is surely punishment for years of participation in the mass hypnosis. Yes, at one time I enabled the rude roommate, by animating parables that enticed kids to eat sugar bombs for breakfast..

Mea culpa!

Given that advertising so often subverts artforms, artists have been known to return the favour.  B.U.G.A.U.P. was a collective of Sydney graffiti artists active in the 1970s/80s who specifically targeted advertising, very active when I lived in that city. Their special brandalism defaced advertising billboards to subvert the intended message of the ad, revealing the hidden truth of the unhealthy product itself. These wittily-defaced billboards on commuter routes in Sydney were talking points at office coffee pots & tea urns each morning.

Their movement spread to other cities in Australia and even to other countries (I often wondered whether Banksy knew about them) and B.U.G.A.U.P. activism ultimately led to a ban on cigarette advertising in Australia in 1994. Advertising’s corrupted parables RE-made into truth telling parables again. Utterly brilliant.

PS: Full BANKSY QUOTE on advertising (as illustrated by Gavin Aung Than).

From www.James-Baker.com

[eucalyprhodes]

Eulogy

Yesterday, I went to a memorial service of a close friend’s late father who passed away this week. Normally, a memorial service doesn’t really evoke any emotions in me, but there was something so profoundly different about this one. This memorial service made me feel that I missed out on knowing my friend’s father because of how wonderful of a person he was! He was described as quietly funny, dedicated, and as someone who goes above and beyond when helping others. He touched so many lives, his impact is so visibly seen in the families that he left behind, and he had a life full of love. 

In his eulogy, I learned that he was in the airline industry and when he moved to the US, he had a cleaning business before finally reunited with his love of airplanes by working for a major airline company at 67 years old! The eulogy said he HAPPILY drove in the traffic every day to LAX until his retirement from the company. If that doesn’t scream commitment to you, I don’t know what else will! 

Every person’s testimony about him left me laughing out loud because even though he is known to be a man of so very little words, his kindness overcomes his quietness. Hearing everyone’s story makes me wished i got to know my friend much much earlier in my life because then, I would’ve been able to know her father too. 

But then there’s another thing that got me thinking. Reading that eulogy and hearing everyone’s testimony made me think of my own eulogy, and the testimony that my loved ones will say. Will my eulogy focused on my career, or what I do for others, or my interests and hobbies? Most importantly, will my legacy be one of kindness, commitment to loyalty to God and to others? 

Here’s how I picture my eulogy will be:

Kezia was born in Jakarta, April 15 1991 to Jimmy Baten and Erlinda Sianturi Baten. She grew up in Jatiwaringin where she started her education in SD Tunas Kasih before transferring to SDK 4 Penabur and SMPK 5 Penabur. In 20015, at the age of 14, Kezia along with her parents and older brother immigrated to the United States where the family lived in La Mirada before settling their roots in Buena Park, California. 

Kezia obtained a bachelors degree in child development and family studies from CSU Long Beach. She initially wanted to pursue social work for social services agency before changing her dream to become an academic advisor for her alma mater. After a grueling 6 years, she finally obtained her dream and became an academic counselor at CSU Fullerton only to learn that she completely hated this job and there was no such thing as a dream job. After only 3 months at CSUF, she quits her job and returned to HR as talent acquisition specialist for a learning and development company. In 2023, she was unfortunately laid off but quickly accepted an offer in HR where she continued consistently for the next 25 years. She started working as HR Specialist at (insert super great company here), and worked her way up to HR Generalist, HR Manager, and finally Director of People & Culture until the day she retires. 

Kezia married Julian in the midst of Covid pandemic on October 4, 2020. Surrounded by their closest friends and families out in nature, they exchanged vows and settled in Fullerton, CA. In 2023, they celebrated their wedding by having a wedding reception in Jakarta, Indonesia. The following year in 2024, they welcomed their first children: twins (JJ and EZ). The family moved to North Richland Hills, TX in spring 2025 and have been living there ever since. 

Kezia loves Jesus and has served in various churches throughout her life. She served as a seating host and admin assistant at The Father’s House of Orange County from 2022 until 2032. She served at her local church (insert church name) and eventually launched a ministry where she served (insert population). Serving God has been a priority for Kezia as well as Julian and they made it a priority to always serve the Kingdom. 

In her spare time, Kezia loves being in the outdoors. She and Julian have gone to every single national parks in the United States, often bringing the twins together with them which inspires the twins’ own love and appreciation for nature. Every long weekend was an opportunity for them to take the twins camping, sleep under the stars, learning about all the plants and animals, and appreciate what God has created for them. After their retirement, Kezia and Julian spent most of their time traveling both for the ministry as well as their own enjoyment. Kezia also loves coffee and hosting dinner parties at her home. Her love language is food and she loves creating a safe space for her loved ones to feel safe and welcomed at her home. 

And that is all I can think about. Will my life really turn out like that? Obviously I don’t know. I do hope the twins thing really happened though :) But if yesterday taught me anything, it’s that our legacy matters. What do I want to be remembered of? Will my various HR titles matter? will my love for the outdoors matter? Maybe not so much. I truly hope i will be remembered as someone who loves the Lord, the Kingdom and has done everything I can to contribute to God’s Kingdom. 

Have you ever thought of your eulogy?

[zenruption]

Unprecedented Indictment? Nope

The narrative is shaped by Donald Trump and his supporters is that his indictment is unprecedented and as such illegitimate. There is little pushback on the unprecedented aspect, and all the focus on the support of the indictment seems to be on its legitimacy. Of course that is the easier case, because Trump can’t seem to open his mouth without criming. So many times we watched him violate laws while in office. From Emoluments clauses to insurrections, his crimes created a fatigue where holding accountable seemed just too hard.

The unprecedented aspect should also get some attention, though. It feels like his presidency revitalized the 1920s. There was a pandemic. There was a rise in authoritarianism. And, the political scandals were right out in the open. An easy comparison more recently involved Nixon’s Vice President, Spiro Agnew. Like Trump, Agnew was addicted to corruption and self-dealing. He ultimately leveraged the possibility that he might become president and above the law into a cushy plea deal.

Rhyming with the 1920s puts Warren Harding as they comparison. During Harding’s presidency, America experienced the Teapot Dome Scandal.

Teapot Dome

The Teapot Dome scandal was a political scandal in the United States during the 1920s. It involved the secret leasing of federal oil reserves at Teapot Dome, Wyoming, and Elk Hills, California, to private oil companies without competitive bidding. The scandal involved high-ranking officials in the administration of President Warren G. Harding, including his Secretary of the Interior, Albert B. Fall.

Fall had been a senator from New Mexico before becoming Secretary of the Interior in 1921. He was responsible for managing the government's oil reserves and used his position to secretly lease the reserves to oil companies in exchange for personal bribes and kickbacks.

The scandal came to light in 1922 when a Senate investigation was launched. Fall was eventually found guilty of accepting bribes and was sentenced to prison. The scandal tarnished the reputation of the Harding administration and led to a wave of public outrage and demands for political reform.

The Teapot Dome scandal is often cited as one of the worst political scandals in American history, and it is remembered as a symbol of government corruption and abuse of power. The scandal also led to significant changes in the way that government contracts and leases were awarded to private companies, with new laws and regulations designed to prevent similar abuses of power in the future.

What feels so disconnected in this narrative, “If they can come for Trump, they can come for you.” is that we want, as a nation of laws, for that to be true. Yes, if I commit crimes, they can come for me. But this isn’t adequate. People need to believe in their leaders and in their government. Therefore a President shouldn’t have more immunity, but be held to the highest standard. They should endure the strictest of public scrutiny, because they are responsible for enforcing the laws as well as living by them.

Scandal is nothing new in American politics. Evidence that our system works, even for the rich, powerful and entitled, would be good for most of the country. Then, we might restore some faith, which is what is needed today.

[princelydisaster]

Chris Fleming speaks to me on a level no one else could, ft. Sam Szabo and a really nice dance routine

[freckleslikestars]

Bay

Mulder and Scully at Charlie Scully and his partner’s commitment ceremony, circa late season three. All this really is is a discussion about homophobia in the scully family. Also I’m drunk so don’t yell at me if my punctualion is bad.

1267 words, read here on AO3

Light piano music filled the summer air, the soft scent of jasmine coiling around every corner as warm California sunlight pervaded the shadows. Gentle chit-chat could be heard as the friends and family of her brother and his partner milled about the venue. Well, friends of Charlie: she was his only family in attendance. As far as she was aware, nobody else had received so much as an invite.

It wasn’t a wedding. Of course, not. It was 1996, and even the most developed, progressive countries seemed awfully close-minded when it came to love.

But everyone was dressed in their finery and there had been poetry and declarations and vows at the ceremony, and now there was prosecco and an open bar, with speeches and dancing to look forward to.

She found herself perched in the seat of a bay window, toying with the earrings her brother had chosen – along with the beaded floral dress and the sheer wrap and the shoes and the hair and...well, pretty much every aspect of how she looked for his day – and trying to blend into the vines of flowers climbing the walls.

‘Ah, there you are, I thought I lost you,’ a glass was proffered, an elegant hand holding it by the stem, not the bowl. She forgot, sometimes, his upbringing, ‘I know you said wine, but they’re doing cosmos, and, well...’

‘Thanks,’ she smiled, ‘you know, many bartenders credit the gay community and pride with the popularity of the Cosmopolitan. Kamikazes were big in the eighties, so Cheryl Cook, who was working in a lot of gay bars at the time, exchanged the lime juice for cranberry to make it pink and slightly sweeter. That’s why Dan drinks them, he likes the history.’

‘Fascinating,’ Mulder smiled down at her, clinked their glasses together and took a sip. He looked around the room at all the happy, laughing faces, ‘so, tell me, why are you one of only two Scullys in attendance? If that’s not an inappropriate question?’

She glanced up at him and shrugged, ‘we’re catholic. Ahab and Mom weren’t...particularly welcoming of Dan. Neither was Bill. And I honestly don’t think any of the extended family even know about Charlie’s preferences.’ She swirled her drink in her glass, studying it as if it had all the answers to the universe in its depths, ‘I guess I wasn’t overly welcoming and accepting either, initially.’

‘What happened?’

‘He lived down the street from us, and he was in my year at school, though he’s closer in age to Charlie. We were in a couple of classes together, and we were all part of this big friend group. He was really good at algebra, and I...may or may not have had a thing for him.’

‘I think I see where this is going.’

‘Yeah. There was this tree, at the park we used to all hang out at, and one night I caught them kissing behind it. I think we all kind of...knew Charlie was gay, we just didn’t talk about it, as if he wouldn’t be if we just pretended hard enough that he wasn’t. It broke my heart; if at sixteen you can know what heartbreak is.’

‘I think you can.’

‘Well, I stopped eating, stopped talking to anyone. This boy that I was oh so very much in love with was kissing my little brother, and so I decided to starve myself to death.’

‘Dana Katherine Scully, I never pegged you as the melodramatic sought.’

‘I was a teenager, I listened to a lot of Fleetwood Mac at the time, what do you expect.’

‘You clearly didn’t starve to death, so what happened.’

‘My mom sat me down, told me to tell her what happened. So I did. She told Ahab, there was a big fight, and Ahab kicked Charlie out.’

‘Shit.’

‘Yeah. Charlie and Dan ran off together that night. I didn’t think we’d ever hear from them again, but...Missy kept in contact with them. Missy...she wasn’t exactly 100% straight either. I remember we argued about that, once, when I was about nineteen. I told her...it doesn’t matter what I told her, it wasn’t something I’d care to repeat. She had every right never to speak to me again, and yet...she just hugged me,’ she backhanded a tear, sniffed, ‘I...I spent a lot of time parroting my parents’ beliefs. And she told me she didn’t like to see such hatred in me, that I would end up losing her like we lost Charlie.’

‘You didn’t lose her, though.’

‘No. It took a long time, and a lot more of her explaining why hating someone for being in love was stupid than I care to admit, but, I came to understand it and accept it. Maybe even love her for it. Charlie called me when I was at the Academy, said he wanted to apologise for making out with the guy I liked. I think Missy told him I’d...’ she paused, looked up at him shyly, ‘I’d been going through some things.’

‘Things?’

‘I- I sort of had a...thing, with this girl who was also at the Academy. It didn’t last long, but it didn’t end well, and, well, I...I guess it ended badly because of a lot of internalised stuff I had going on, and I think Missy knew Charlie would understand the self-loathing a bit more than she did.’

‘I didn’t know-‘

‘Nobody but Charlie and Dan do, these days. Missy did, of course, but-‘

‘I won’t tell anyone, I-‘

‘I never thought you would,’ she shook her head, a small smile pulling at the corners of her lips. ‘Anyway, I realised you have to start building your own faith – you can’t always rely on God to have all the answers: I think I’m still learning that.’

‘I’m sorry,’ he cast his gaze down to the floor after watching her face so intently as she retold the story.

‘What for?’

‘I thought your family was kind of perfect. I mean, I guess your mom kinda manages to pull this whole image together of the perfect catholic family, y’know, with the doctor daughter and the navy son, the way she always seems to be there for you. And you’ve always seemed like you really love your parents.’

‘I do,’ she shrugged, ‘and Mom, she’s...she’s old fashioned. I think she doesn’t really mind what we get up to in our personal lives so long as we don’t, y’know, make a big deal out of it and flaunt it, I guess. And...I think she’s lost too much to care much more, anyway. Charlie loves mom, in the abstract, too. If Bill weren’t around, we could probably talk to her about it, but Bill-‘

‘Not so keen on “love is love”?’

‘Not really. I love him, in that grudging, sibling way, but I can’t imagine ever wanting to voluntarily spend time with him without feeling any sense of obligation, and I think the same is true for him.’

‘”All unhappy families,” and so on,’ Mulder sighed, downing the last dregs of his Cosmo.

‘Tolstoy had a point,’ she said, slipping from her seat and reaching for his now empty Nick and Nora, ‘get you another?’

‘Sure,’ he smiled, relinquishing the glass to her possession, ‘hey, Scully?’

‘Hmm?’

‘Have I told you how pretty you look today?’

She blushed, looked away with her bottom lip caught between her teeth, ‘perhaps I should just get you a water, Mulder.’

He chuckled, knowing full well he wasn’t drunk, and nodded, ‘perhaps.’

Tagging @today-in-fic

[nataliedanovelist]

GF - Stars Aren’t the Only Things That Glitter

A Drifting Stars AU short, collaborating with @clownwry.

2nd, 3rd, 4th.

~~~~~~~~~~

“Grunkle Ford, look out!”

“Mabel, stay back!”

BANG!

“Mabel… MABEL! HOLD ON! I’M COMING! MABEL!”

~~~~~~~~~~

Mabel looked at the blazing fire, trying to pretend to ignore her great-uncles muttering so she might pick up a swear word, be it alien or English was perfectly fine by her. Mabel didn’t pick up any swears, but she did hear the words “reckless” and “irresponsible” and “inconceivable”. The Listening Game did a fair job of distracting her from the pain on her arm and shoulder. Except when Grunkle Ford’s bandages were a little too tight and she would wince at the friction on her burn.

Still muttering through his teeth, his eye glued to the injury through his single-cracked glasses, he did it again, pulling on the bandage a little too hard, this time making Mabel accidentally let am “ouch!” slip past her lips. Ford looked up at her and his expression grew softer and more nurturing. “I’m sorry, my dear, but really, you shouldn’t have done that.”

“They were gonna shoot you…”

“I don’t care.” Ford said firmly. “If I tell you to run, you run. If I tell you to hide, you hide. If I tell you to save yourself and leave me behind, you do so.”

“No.”

The nomadic scientist blinked, slightly surprised by her stubbornness. Only slightly surprised, because she is a Pines, after all. But she is a good kid and in the month they had been traveling the Multiverse, she had never outright defied him like this. “Excuse me?” He wasn’t even stern or angry; he was too surprised (and maybe even a little proud) to properly scold her anymore.

“No. That’s stupid.” Mabel answered, her little cheeks puffed up in determination, her eyes sparkling with the reflection of the fire, a flame of her own in the windows to her soul. “I’ll never leave you behind. We’re a family, we gotta stick together if we’re gonna survive and get home. We need each other. Besides, if the tables were turned, would you leave me behind?”

“That’s an entirely different matter.” Ford said with a small smile on his ruffed-up face; he resumed his work on the burn more gently now and finished wrapping it up, securing the bandage. “I’m old, I’ve lived my life. You take priority.”

“I don’t care.” Mabel said, copying Ford’s exact tone and voice from earlier. The grown man snorted with amusement.

Ford decided to put this little argument on hold, seeing how there was no changing Mabel’s mind right now. And he didn’t want to spend the entire evening rebuking her. “You did do a very good job disarming those hunters. I’m very proud of you.”

Mabel sat up a little straighter and smiled up at Ford. “Thank you.”

Ford smiled at her and stood, moving to his large backpack to fish out the things for tea and dinner, though it would probably only be dried meat and oats. “I’m just glad you’re okay, pumpkin.”

Mabel’s eyes widened as her world was put on pause. She felt like she was being sucked into a time vortex, transported into a memory.

Grunkle Stan was dusting some zombie parts off of his armchair when Mabel was walking by, leaving the kitchen after giving Soos his cure for zombification. Stan noticed that Mabel looked very tired. He smiled at her from her seat, and Mabel ran up to him and climbed into his lap for a big hug.

“Hey, you alright?” Stan asked.

“Yeah, I’m okay. Are you?”

“Oh, I’m fine. I’m just glad you’re okay, pumpkin.” And he gave her a secure squeeze and Mabel happily hugged him back.

Mabel was shoved back into reality, accompanied by a sinking feeling of loss. She missed Grunkle Stan. She missed Dipper. She missed Waddles, and Soos, and Wendy, and the Shack, and Oregon, and California, and Mom and Dad…

Ford turned back to the fire with a kettle and wire-spider in hand, ready to ask Mabel to fetch some water (she always enjoyed being of assistance), but he stopped when he saw her crying with her eyes shut and wiping her cheeks dry with her wrists. Ford was immediately halted and his priorities shifted drastically. Nothing mattered at this moment but making her feel better.

He was swift. Ford scooped up some water from the clean stream into the kettle, then used the wire-spider to hold the kettle over the fire. Giving the water plenty of time to heat up and steam, Ford gently picked Mabel up from her seat on the log, only to hold her close and let her wrap her arms around his neck. He didn’t say a word, being a social-cripple and having no idea what he could say that would make her feel better, so he stayed silent and was simply there for her.

And really, that was all Mabel needed.

~~~~~~~~~~

The next morning the two humans were lucky to come across a small rustic town in the woods, reminding Ford of the small Tennessee-town Fiddleford grew up in. Except of course there were no humans, but blue-skinned elves with pointy years and the occasional centaur.

Ford had stolen a bit of money from a hunter yesterday, which meant they got to restock on supplies and even buy a cheap breakfast at an outside cafe. Sitting at a table under an umbrella, Ford was going over his plan with Mabel while she munched on her sweetly-cooked purple apples tossed in spices and sugar.

“... so once we reach this cavern here, we’ll reach a very interesting town called Flush Valley. I’ve heard it specializes in building mechanical limbs and prosthetics, but it’s surrounded by rich minerals perfect for building, so we can find what we need easily here. There may even be a day-by-day job I can get to earn a bit of money for food and shelter.”

“I can work, too! Daddy always said I was like a French horse!” Mabel added in excitedly.

Ford chuckled. “We’ll see. I would feel more comfortable if you were working so I could keep an eye on you. Moving on,” The old scientist sipped his strange alien coffee, but it contained caffeine and somewhat resembled his home dimension’s coffee taste, so he drank it. “The way there could be crawling with scavengers. A lot of people come to Flush Valley just barely hanging on by a thread, easy targets for hunting and stealing food and supplies. So we need to keep our guard up for the next two days.”

“Okay.” Mabel said, as nonchalantly as if Ford told her to remember to add milk to a grocery list.

Ford gave her a firmer look and added, “So, if we think we’re being followed, what do we do?”

“We pretend we don’t know and we keep walking calmly.” Mabel replied. “We keep our eyes open for a way to lose them, and where the sneaky-peaky spies are.”

“Very good.” Ford smiled at her. “If we decide to try to lose them, what do we do?”

“Run as fast as we can. If I can’t catch up I get on your shoulders and focus on making them go away, while you get us away.”

“Yes, excellent. What do we do if we decide to confront them?”

“I grab by sling-shot and exploding rocks and hit as many guys as I can. I aim for the knees or feet so they fall and can’t shoot us. Oh, and we stand with our backs to each other so we see everything, together.”

“Couldn’t have said it better myself. Now, if we are surrounded and I find a way to escape, what do you do?”

“Make sure you go in so you can lead the way!” Mabel answered with a grin.

“N-No, honey.” Ford said gently with a smile, as if informing a kindergartner that 1+1=2, not 11. “If I find a way to escape, you go first…”

“No,” Mabel said, still smiling as she shook her head. “You go first so I can make sure you’re coming.”

Ford sighed and took another sip of his drink. “Okay, if I tell you to run, you…”

“I grab your hand and run with you, making sure no one gets lost.”

“Mabel, no.”

“Mabel YES!” The girl grinned with determination. “You’re stuck with me, old man! You can’t get rid of me!”

Ford was getting annoyed at this point. He pinched the bridge of his nose, lifting his glasses up slightly, and growled, “I’m not trying to get rid of you, I’m trying to save you!”

Mabel gave him a very serious look and questioned, “By leaving me alone out here?”

“No! I-...” But Ford stopped and bit his lip. His niece did have an excellent point. As much as Ford was willing to do anything to keep her safe, as much as Ford was willing to sacrifice his own life for her’s, that really wasn’t a good idea.

There was a good chance Mabel could survive without him, at least until she found a nice family to take her in (or, somehow, miraculously, Stanley opened the portal and brought her home, but Ford didn’t dare to hope for that). But she was so young and inexperienced in the Multiverse. At least when Ford was first thrown into the chaos he was an adult and was accustomed to weirdness thanks to his six years of researching Gravity Falls. Mabel was extremely resourceful, imaginative, intelligent, and clever. She was also stronger and faster than many would assume. But she was too trusting. Too innocent. So, not to belittle Mabel or underestimate her, but she was right; she needed Ford, and as noble as it would be to exchange his life for her’s if it came down to it, that would also be incredibly stupid and only buy Mabel a little more time until she was captured or enslaved or killed or even worse.

And of course, only someone as people-smart and clever as Mabel could make Ford see that.

He sighed tiredly. “O-... Okay.” Mabel smiled proudly at him. “Okay, I’ll… I’ll try to be more careful.” Ford promised. “I… I just need you to be safe.”

“Don’t worry, I think we do a pretty good job of keeping each other safe.” Mabel complimented, holding out a bite of her fruit on a fork for Ford.

The old man held up a polite hand and declined, but his stomach turned against him and growled, and Mabel frowned at him, giving Ford a deja vu feeling of his mother forcing him and his brothers to eat their vegetables. So Ford smiled and accepted the sweetly cooked fruit. “Yes, I think so, too.”

[keltonwrites]

Where no one knows your name

How many times is a person meant to make new friends? When I moved into an apartment in DC with an absolutely iconic girl from Craigslist, I wrote in my journal, “you never know when you’ll meet your next bridesmaid.” Charmingly juvenile, as I was 24 years old. Ironic, as I never had any bridesmaids. And embarrassing, knowing I wrote something that’s surely been embroidered on a bachelorette party t-shirt by now. My point was: you can meet people you fall in love with anywhere, anytime, assuming your heart (and calendar) are open. Now my heart and calendar are open and I am one of Elizabeth Bennet’s sad sisters, cloying and desperate for attention while everyone at the ball ignores me. Meeting people here is unnerving and hapless and eye-clawingly vulnerable. My first new friend told me she was moving away in a few months. Do you invest deeply in hopes of another faraway friendship? Do you just go back to waving as you pass on the street? I like this girl! What an embarrassing thing to have to say to someone! Do you just invite people to every and anything like a lunatic? I can’t even remember to call the people I am forever-and-ever in cahoots with. I’m also deeply bound by what I’ll call the Movie Trap: say it’s 3pm during not-a-pandemic, and you get the urge to see a movie. You look at the showings, and there’s one you really want to see at 7:15. You think to yourself, “I should make an effort,” and you text a friend. “Hey, you wanna go see This Cool Movie at 7:15 tonight?” No one ever says yes. Don’t give me an example of when someone has, because it’s always one of these answers:

“Oooh, I’m actually seeing it with Kate tomorrow - wanna come?”

“Can we go to the 9pm showing? Stuck at work.”

“Yeah but let’s see Movie You’ll Fucking Hate instead.”

Now maybe I’m just lighting flares guiding you to the worst parts of my personality, but this drives me nuts. No, Liz, I don’t want to go tomorrow. I want to go tonight. At 7:15. So I can be in bed by 10. And you’d have to drag my dead body and prop open my eyes to get me to see something like Marriage Story in theaters. The Movie Trap is a big reason I usually hang out by myself, or I make plans weeks in advance. (Don't I sound like a blast.) Just the idea of being like, “I like you! Wanna hang out in October?” makes me want to collapse into a puddle of sad adulthood. Which is why on Friday at 4:30pm, when a girl I’d met a week prior asked if I wanted to grab a drink, I just said yes. I put on a pretty dress, did my makeup, put stuff in a purse, and drove the 25 minutes to town. It was really fun! And how novel to have new contacts in my phone like “Maggie blue house” and “Jess concert friend” — a throwback to the days of “Greg guy on L train” and “Devon ad party.” The very concept of not knowing someone’s last name or even needing it, and a year from now updating their contact info and smiling at your origin story. But for the most part, no one is in our phones. In terms of phone numbers collected, here is the list:

Two friends we knew prior who thank god you guys exist.

New friend who is moving away.

New friend who is game to drink tequila and ride mountain bikes.

Neighbor-not-yet-friend who I really fucking like and am not sure how to cross hang-out threshold with.

​Not to say there aren’t any other prospects or people I’m platonically gaga over, but I don’t have their phone numbers. There are honestly a lot of people like this because when you live in a small town (and you’re from the Midwest) you say “oop, sorry” to every person/object you bump into, and you say “hi :)” to every person you see. These are the rules. If I drive by you and don’t wave, it’s because I was so deep in a daydream I probably shouldn’t have been driving in the first place. This isn’t acceptable, because in our urgency to tattoo our vaccination status on our foreheads so we can make friends, it turns out just driving by someone can be a viable strategy. A few days ago, a man was driving by our kitchen window and then our driveway, and then he reversed back up to the kitchen window and started waving. Ben went outside — it was that kind of wave. The man had seen from his car a smokejumper emblem on the back of a truck in our driveway. “Hey, are you a smokejumper?” We aren’t. But my dad was, and he was in town visiting, accompanied by the emblem on the back of his truck. The guy said we should drink sometime. Numbers were not exchanged. We’ll call that a node, because it’s not quite a connection. And it’s mainly nodes, waiting to be connected, to have relevance. But first, no matter who you’re trying to befriend, you have to answer everyone else’s Do I Care Quiz. The quiz is employed by 93% of locals to determine how they feel about you existing within their personal 50-mile radius. The first question is non negotiable:

1) Are you visiting?

Variations on this question include “how long are you in town?” or “what brings y’all to town?” or my least favorite and most insulting, “did you just finish Jeeping?” I know I have blonde hair and say y’all, but how dare you. (Also, to be clear, you can own a Jeep, customize your Jeep, mod out your Jeep, and love your Jeep, but you’re not Jeeping until you drive too fast through a tiny town so you can hurl your Jeep over a mountain pass without ever getting out of it.) So the answer to “are you visiting” is “no, I live here.” Which brings us to the next question, my favorite for how loaded the gun, kneeling in the grass, scope on, target locked it is.

2) Are you part-time or full-time?

The first time I answered this question, I didn’t realize it was essentially like asking how someone voted in the 2020 election. The judgment was cocked and ready and the palpable relief/joy/or at the very least, tolerance, exuded by answering “full-time” was like when the sun comes out from behind the clouds on a 40 degree day. I was fine, but wow that does feel better. The third question though does not have a standard hoped-for answer. This is where nodes turn to connections turn to phone numbers.

3) What brings you here?

It seems like the best possible answer would be saying you work in town, and you’re going to begin construction on displaced-worker housing to ensure the people who run this town can actually live in it. We’d have everyone’s phone number. Saying you’re a writer who works remotely and bought a house from a legendary and beloved local who could no longer afford it is really something you keep to yourself. But in the interest of making friends, I just word vomit my entire history. We might as well find out at the onset if I make your eyes roll back into your skull. Not at all threatening that all it takes is a single social signal misinterpreted to be the absolute death knell of my ability to make friends in a town of some 1400 adults. In fact, I’ll share one such interaction. I was hiking with Cooper, about 5 miles by foot away from my house. I was on a trail, crossing a sloped meadow, and a group was traversing up the hillside to the trail. I said hi, where y’all coming from. One girl answered and we talked about the trail. She eyed me up and down. “Did you just move here?” “I did!” “I served your family last week,” she said. “Oh,” that phrasing. “Must have been my in-laws.” “Heard you bought Jack’s house. Such a bummer when locals like that are forced out.” “We didn’t even know about his house,” I said. “We were looking at another house and he asked his realtor if he could get us to come see his house. We just loved it, and him!” She had no emotional reaction to this. “You moved from California?” she asked. (Dangerous question.) “Yeah, got these sea level lungs, haha,” attempting to disarm with humor was a failure, “but couldn’t be happier to be out of California.” “It’s not like this all year. Winter’s really hard here, you’re in for a rude awakening.” “Well California’s the last place I lived, but I’m not from there. I’ve lived in brutal winters. At least Colorado gets sun!” I laugh with cloaked loathing. “It’s different when you live at altitude,” she said, like no human aside from her had ever been literally anywhere. “Are you trying to go around?” She indicated the path behind her. “No, y’all go ahead, just gonna wait to give you your space. I’m sure you’re faster than me.” “K, good luck making it to the lake." Maybe she was thirsty. Maybe she was hungover. Maybe she just has vicious delivery, but it felt like every blade of grass was leaning against the wind to listen. She was with four other people and not one of them said a word. I left that interaction not wanting to see another human ever again. But that interaction, and her intimate knowledge of exactly which house I lived in, made me want to decorate like we lived in a gingerbread house, all candy canes and plum drops, screaming to any passerby that we’re friendly. One of the mayor’s first questions to me was “what are you going to do to the house?” There are rules here about what your house can look like, and I kept emphasizing we bought the house because we loved it, not because we wanted to change everything about it. And now, instead of wanting to decorate the interior, I want to put up shades so we don’t contribute to light pollution, I want to hang a sign by the water spigot saying “grab some if you need” for hikers and mountain bikers, I want to paint a sign for the wild mint by our door that says, “I mint to tell you to take some,” because our neighbors were openly panicked they wouldn’t be able to just grab mint from the cabin’s garden anymore. Without question, COVID makes things harder. Dinner parties feel like dares. Dropping cookies off at someone’s house feels invasive. Grabbing a drink feels like the ultimate sign of trust. But at least we have nodes who can connect who can think to invite us and who can see that despite having lived in California, we’re not all that bad. In the meantime, I’ll be painting signs about water and mint, hoping to garner the benefit of the doubt from the so beautifully, earnestly, and waiting-to-see-if-you’re-worth-it doubtful.

Subscribe to the newsletter at tinyletter.com/keltonwrites — high altitude relocation and renovation in a tiny mountain town.

[imagines-by-a-typical-fangirl]

Californian Dream (Pt. 11 of 11)

Pairing: Billy Hargrove X Reader

Word count: 2.3 K

Summary: Being part of one of the richest families of California doesn't mean you're happy. Your life is boring, and you're surrounded by meaningless people and their meaningless talk. Even during Summer, with the break you have from college, there's nothing good going on. Nothing but the new pool guy, Billy, the most handsome man you ever saw. You were successfully avoiding him, not wanting to act like an idiot in front of the guy until Billy accepts to be your date for a fancy gala you're forced to attend. The night was going well, even better when he sneaked you out to go to the beach. But a gang of criminals breaks into the party, kidnapping the heirs to the wealthiest families, which includes you. So, for your safety, your parents want you to stay with Billy, living in his apartment until the criminals are caught. And that could take weeks, maybe even months.

Warnings: Light violence

<- Previous part (10)

{Stranger Things Masterlist}

{Dacre Montgomery Masterlist}

×

California Never Felt Like Home

Even though he's not going anywhere any time soon, you hook one leg around his waist, just to pull him a little closer. “You're my prisoner now.” You mutter, sleep still clouding your voice.

“I wouldn't want to be anywhere else.” He answers, placing kisses all over your face.

“The good part is that we'll have all the afternoon to ourselves.” You giggle, moving to lay on your back with Billy hovering over you.

“I'll take you to see the sunset on that beach you like. Completely desert.” He says in a low voice. “If we survive your parents.”

“We already did.” Kissing him, you move to lie on top of him. “It'll be at this super expensive, fancy restaurant, so it means they won't yell at me or put on a show.”

“Sometimes I think you should consider what you're giving up.” He gets sad suddenly, sighing. You know what he's thinking about, and it will take time for Billy to see and understand this is what you really want.

“I'm giving up a huge house I never felt like it was mine. Lots of money that never brought me happiness.” In between the words, you place kisses all over his face. “But what I'm getting...? God, it's amazing.” Sitting up, you straddle his hips. “I got real friends now, and a home. And an awesome boyfriend who doesn't compare to the assholes on my parents' list.”

“I'm so happy I'm around to see the good daughter rebelling.” He sits up too, strong arms encircling your waist. “You look so good, little rebel.”

“You're just saying that because I'm wearing your shirt.” Wrapping your arms around his neck, you raise an eyebrow. Yesterday, you decided to pick one of his shirts to put on instead of your regular pajamas.

“Babe, you look good on everything. But I gotta admit seeing you wearing my clothes is very hot.”

Smiling, you can't help but blush. “We still have a few hours, so I think we can maybe make out for a while?” Biting your lip at his smirk, you giggle.

“Starting the day off with good ideas already.” He mutters, holding you up and throwing you back on the mattress. “This is the first day of the rest of your lives, you know that, right? Because I'm never letting you go. Unless you get tired of me.”

“I don't think I'll ever get tired of you, so yes...” Caressing his cheek, you take a deep breath, the sunlight illuminating his face. “The very first day of the rest of our lives.”

•••

The morning bliss had to be interrupted. But, as you sit across from your mother at the restaurant, you don't feel scared, or nervous. You feel perfectly fine. You're not dressed for this place, you can see it in your mother's eyes, but you don't care. You like the clothes you're wearing, and your mother's disgusting stare makes you chuckle under your breath. Making yourself comfortable, you ignore the silence. Nobody is saying anything, and your father has been staring at Billy as if he could kill him with his stare.

“So... I believe you want an explanation.” You start, cupping your hands together above the table. “Billy and I are dating. And I'll be living with him.”

“Is it some kind of joke?” Your mother interrupts, leaning closer. “You can't possibly think I'll believe you'll do that.” You're about to say something when she raises a hand, and you shut your mouth. “I get it, (Y/N). Billy is good looking, he has this appeal, he's different from the guys you're used to, rougher around the edges, I get all that. But this? This is insane.”

It's only a matter of time for the insults to begin, you're aware of that. “That's not all, mother.” You add, not even considering giving her a proper answer. “I'm not going to course Law anymore. I'll look for something I actually like. And go to the public University.”

“What the–”

“I have a good job now, at a store of diving equipment and I love it.” Cutting your father short, you raise your voice just a little. “That's my life now. I'm not going back to the house, but I want you both to know that I'll visit, of course, and you can visit me whenever you want and–”

“I'm not going to let you throw your entire life on the trash because of the freaking pool guy.” Your father's voice storms out, making a few people look your way. He does seem a little embarrassed, but definitely angry. “This man–” He points at Billy, and you hold his hand under the table. “–he can give you nothing. Nothing. What do you have in life, Hargrove? I shitty job, a tiny apartment. Do you think you can provide to someone like my daughter?” There it is. The insults. And, knowing exactly what Neil told Billy, you won't let your father treat him this way.

“You wanna know what Billy gave me, father?” Smiling, you begin. “He gave me a life. I never felt truly happy, never. Not in our mansion, or those fancy galas, or wearing fashionable clothes. Never. But with the pool guy, as you call him, in his tiny apartment with his lowlife friends? I finally felt something. I finally felt life was worth living.”

“Alright.” He slams his fist on the table, glancing at your mother, a mean smile on his face. “If you insist on doing this, I'll disown you.” He giggles, a hand half covering his mouth. “You won't see any cents from me anymore. Is that what you want?”

He looks like he got everything figured out. Exchanging a stare with Billy, you can tell he's worried. Does he think you'll fall for this? Squeezing his hand a little and smiling, you try to reassure him. He must feel awful, seated here, and listening to all this shit. “I–”

The waiter comes and you're cut short, waiting for your parents to order whatever they want to eat. “Oh, finally. We'll want Muffin Pan Shrimp Ragoon. Thought I'll give my kid one last decent lunch at a decent restaurant. What do you think?”

Seriously? “I can't eat that.” You think it's so obvious, but by the look on your father's face, he doesn't get it.

“What? Do you want to order something more expensive as a goodbye to your good life?”

“She's allergic to shrimp,” Billy speaks for the first time, his voice strong and deep. Both your parents look a little surprised, but soon enough recognition comes to their faces.

They completely forgot, but it doesn't bother you. You're happy Billy actually remembered it. You only mentioned it once, at the gala. “It's alright, though. We'll have lunch by the beach.” You tell them, smiling at Billy.

“Let me guess...” He dismisses the waiter with a gesture of his hand. “Sandwiches and soda?”

“Actually, yes.” Exclaiming, you stand up, and Billy does the same. It's over. You told them what's gonna happen now, and they have to make peace with that. And if your father wants to change his will and cut you out of it, so be it. “I made them myself and they're delicious.”

“For goodness sake.” Your mother mutters, running a hand through her hair. “Honey, please think this through, alright? Your house will be opened whenever you want to come back.”

“Thanks, mom. I will visit, I promise.” That said, you smile at them before turning away, hand in hand with Billy, walking away from the table.

“You better wipe off your bank account, (Y/N), because you'll never get a penny from me again!” Your father yells, and you simply wave at him, not even bothering to look back.

When you're outside, you feel light-headed, relieved. “This wasn't as bad as it could be.” You breathe out, walking to where Billy parked his car, a block away.

“Did he mean it? About disowning you?” He sounds serious, despite the smile that's on your face.

Turning around without letting go of his hand, you start walking backward. “I don't give a damn.” Speaking slowly, you wink at him, stopping suddenly and letting him come closer by himself before grabbing the collar of his shirt and tiptoeing to kiss him, sweet and slow.

“What the– (Y/N)?” Someone calls and since you do know who it is, you keep kissing Billy for a while longer. “Holy shit.”

It makes you giggle when he pulls your closer, deepening the kiss. But eventually, you have to breathe, so you break apart, a smile on your lips.

“Care to explain why the hell you're making out with the pool guy? In public?” Daniel says as you turn to face him. He has a girl with him, but you don't know who she is. He seems better, given the time he spent held hostage. “Have you lost your mind, girl?”

Sighing, you roll your eyes at him. You have a lunch date on the beach, and you don't wanna waste any more time with meaningless people. “Yeah. I'm dating the pool guy.” You tell him, shrugging your shoulders. “Actually, I'm in love with the pool guy. And now I work at a scuba diving store, so you can come up with some kind of name for me too, but you wanna know what? I don't give a damn.” Pulling Billy harder, you start walking again. “I'd love to say that we'll be seeing each other soon, but we won't. So... Goodbye, Daniel.” Turning on your heels, you leave the couple behind.

The drive to the beach is short, and instead of sitting on the sand, you chose to seat on the hood of his car. Which he now calls Lily, and you peacefully eat the sandwiches and drink the soda. You wouldn't trade it for all the money in the world. The ocean, the sunlight, the fresh wind messing with your hair. The simple food, the hood of his car... And him. Billy is certainly the best part. Having him here is indescribable, and knowing you'll go back home with him is even better.

“So... Will you help me chose something to major in?” You ask as he helps you climb off of the hood, taking your hand and starting to walk down the beach.

“Actually, I have some fresh news coming straight from Jason.” He says, a bright smile on his lips.

Furrowing your eyebrows, you stop to look at him. “What news...?”

“Mr. and Mrs. Heeler, from the store.” Billy starts, putting a strand of hair behind your ear. “They want to retire and they're thinking about passing the store over to you and Jason since they don't have any relatives. If you both agree on being associates.”

“Oh my God!” You exclaim, tiptoeing to crash your lips on his. “This is amazing.”

“Please act surprised when Jason tells you.” In a sudden motion, Billy reaches for your thighs, pulling you up and wrapping your legs around his waist. Using his shoulder for balance, you giggle. “He didn't want me to tell you but I couldn't resist.”

“This is just awesome. This is...” Taking a deep breath, you take a look at the ocean. The sound of the waves crashing is low and calming, and the way the sunlight reflects on the water shines like liquid silver. Then, you look at Billy again, his smile warming up your heart. “I love you.” You haven't said it yet, but it feels like the right time. And this is how you feel. You've never been in love before, but you know how this is how it feels. Like someone owns your whole heart. “I'm not sure if you feel the same but I just need you to know that–”

“I'm completely in love with you.” Billy cuts you off, bouncing you up a little and making the way back to his car. “I have been for a while and that scared the hell out of me.” When you reach Lily, he puts you down on the hood, remaining in between your legs. “But now... I'm sure of it. I want a life with you. A future.”

Blushing, you smile, your forehead touching Billy's. “So that thing you said about me getting to pick the kid's names...” You tease, placing a kiss on the corner of his lips.

“I mean it, if...” Pulling away from a little, he locks eyes with you. “If you don't pick something silly like the name you insisted on giving my car.”

“It's not silly!” Playfully, you try to push him away, giggling when he grabs your sides, tickling you. “Alright! Alright!” After a while you manage to stop him, his hands going back to your hips. “We'll pick names we both like. How does it sound?”

“It sounds like we're talking about kids even before getting married.”

“What?” Furrowing your eyebrows, you try to process what the hell he just said. “Sorry, I thought you heard you talking about...”

“I never felt like the type for marriage but, God, I want to marry you,” Billy exclaims, connecting his lips to yours.

You have a lot to say, a lot of things to ask, but you surrender to the kiss instead. This is all the answers you need. His lips on yours, on this paradise on Earth.

California never felt like home because home isn't a place, but a person. Billy is your home. Wherever you are, if he's with you, it's the right place. Nothing else needs to be said. The life you had before vanished like smoke in the air, and this is even better than everything you could ever dream of. Not all the money in the world can buy this moment, and you don't regret a thing. Love is far more important, and now that you found it, nothing will make you let it go.

×

@multific @dontxfearxthereaper @nope-thanks @nikkixostan @shinydixon @clockworkballerina @infinitelycharmed23 @lilred91 @moatsnow

[mkstrigidae]

Current WIPs and Fic Concepts

I promised I would do this yesterday, and then I forgot!!! (I was very sleep deprived). Anyways, here are a bunch of the WIP premises that I have in my 'unfinished drafts' folder. Most have at least a few pages written for them, but I love them all! ☺️💕

- A Santa Clarita Diet AU (Jonsa) Takes place in sunny southern California, where a shitty dinner at a mediocre restaurant turns into a huge problem for Jon and Sansa when Sansa's heart stops beating. Although she seems fine, Jon is flabbergasted several days later as he watches his wife- who alphabetizes their pantry and refuses to let anyone wear shoes in the house- rip the throat out of one of the sleazy new partners at their law firm, eating half of him before anyone processes what's going on. Hilarity ensues as Sansa's inhibitions and filter disappear, Arya ropes an extremely confused Gendry into helping figure out what the hell is going on just because he moderates the zombie forum on reddit, and Jon tries to deal with the fact that the woman he loves more than anything is now a humanitarian. He really could use a drink. (This one is actually mostly complete, but i need to refine a few things- i really love it. It's as gory and irreverent as the show, so viewer discretion advised, but it's a BLAST to write).

- A Thor/MCU AU (Jonsa, Steve Rogers/Sansa)- Asgardian prince Aegon is banished to Midgard after one too many arrogant decisions, and is promptly hit by a van containing Dr. Sansa Stark, Dr. Barristan Selmy, and Margaery Tyrell- two astrophysicists studying wormholes and Sansa's best friend and pseudo-intern. Marg yells at him, he yells back, Sansa tases him, and Barristan didn't sign up for the kind of heavy lifting that getting a 200+ pound slab of muscle into the back of a van takes. And then Aegon's younger brother, Jon, shows up, in the middle of an identity crisis because, apparently, he's adopted. He wasn't intending to stay, but he's rather drawn to Dr. Stark and her brilliance, and against her better judgement, she starts to trust him, and maybe even like him. This story is in about three parts so far- the first is based on 'Thor' and the second on 'The Avengers' and are fully Jonsa, and the third started as a family bonding story between the Stark kids and Tony (Ned and Tony are second cousins, and Ned was really supportive of Tony in rehab without expecting anything in return), and accidentally turned into a Steve Rogers/Sansa Stark story, which is a pairing i am HERE for. A lot of this one is written, but it needs some fill in before publishing, although it's one of my favorites that i've written to go back and actually read.

- A Star Wars AU (Jonsa) where Sansa and Arya are Alderaanian princesses who are off planet when Alderaan is destroyed- Sansa as a senator and Arya as a pilot, both working for the rebellion, and jon is a smuggler who does not know how all of these people got on his ship and why two princesses are sassing him. His copilot, Tormund (yes he's a wookie), thinks it is hilarious. I started this one just the other day, and it's already thirty pages long, most of them involving Sansa and Arya sassing people. Dany is a leader in the rebellion, Roose Bolton is the emperor, and Barbrey Dustin is a disgruntled former jedi trying to live in peace on a remote planet until another Stark crashes into her life and harangues her into teaching again.

- A witches/magic AU (Jonsa) where the Starks run an apothecary and spellcasting supplies shop. Jon had been completely in the dark about magic before his mother confessed to being born into a family of witches. He finds himself traveling to her hometown, trying to understand her world more clearly, and what it means for him. On the way, he develops something of a crush on the red-headed shop clerk who brews the best headache potions in town. Featuring lots of magical shenanigans, this is one of my favorites in the folder :)

- A 24 hour diner AU (Jonsa) where Jon is a local mob boss, and Sansa works the late shift at Seaworth's diner to buy textbooks for the PhD she's working on in botany. Sansa's running from memories, and Jon has a soft spot for the red-headed waitress who always remembers how he likes his coffee.

- An East of the Sun, West of the Moon AU!!! (Jonsa) This is one of my fav fairy tales, and of course i couldn't resist Jon as a direwolf striking a deal with the starks!

- A Roomates AU (Jonsa)- Arya, Jon, Tormund, and Sam have been renting the same house together off Winterfell's campus for years- but when Sam moves in with his girlfriend, they need one more person on the lease. Sansa, about to relocate to Winterfell for grad school, finds out that her boyfriend has been cheating on her and that her housing plans have fallen through, all on the same day. Needless to say, she's a bit upset when she calls Arya to relay the news. There's a simple solution here, if Arya and Tormund can stop teasing Jon about his crush for five minutes. (any excuse to write tormund and arya roasting jon, tbh).

- A Fae AU (Jonsa)- When Sansa, a baker living in the city, washes her face in an enchanted spring on a camping trip, she gains the sight as a result. Suddenly able to see the fae underworld all around her is disorienting and terrifying. Sansa tries to conceal it- afraid of what might happen if the fae around her know that she can see them- but slips up, and catches the attention of Jon Snow- one of the lords of the unseelie court.

- A nuclear winter wasteland AU (Jonsa)- (?? I don't even know how to describe this premise, haha) where the Starks are living and running the Free Winterfell settlement in Siberia after a worldwide nuclear meltdown. Before the fallout, Sansa was one of the world's preeminent researchers in plant genetics and pathology, and works at the settlement to create newer, disease and radiation resistant crops to distribute for free to other settlements, aiming to break up the monopoly that Lannister Corp has on the market. Jon is a scavenger, searching throughout Siberia for his sister Rhae who disappeared several years previously. When he runs across Arya Starkovna, helping her fight off another band of radiation ravaged scavengers is just instinct- he doesn't think twice about it. In thanks, she brings him to the Winterfell settlement, where her brother Robb offers Jon sanctuary and resources, in exchange for serving as a bodyguard for Sansa when she travels to other settlements. Sansa is not particularly thrilled by this arrangement, but given that multiple parties seem to want her dead, she doesn't have much of a choice but to accept his company.

- A reincarnation AU (Jonsa)- of sorts. Robb is an archaeologist who finds a strange set of runes at a site up north, and immediately calls in Jon Snow- a historian and expert in said ancient language, as well as an old university friend of Robb's. When he arrives though, Robb shows him their most valuable finds- two mysterious ice blocks, with what appear to be perfectly preserved bodies from over a thousand years ago. No one could ever have imagined that either of them were still alive, but when the ice melts, revealing two very alive girls, the entire crew is instantly buried in NDAs, and given an assignment from the Westerosi government to figure out what the hell was going on. Sansa and Arya wake up, extremely confused about the world they live in, trying to adapt and mourning all that they've lost, even as the people around them wear familiar faces.

- Soulmates AU (Jonsa)- (Yes, another one, I love this dumb trope) Trauma surgeon and medical resident Sansa Stark is having a very bad day, and ends up meeting her soulmate during what she thinks is a mugging gone wrong. Fortunately, he’s not the one mugging her, just an intervening bystander, but she ends up slightly shot nonetheless. Sansa’s fretting about bleeding on the upholstery in his car, but Jon is a bit more worried about her injuries than the blood stains. He’s a bit confused when she threatens him if he takes her to a specific hospital, nearly has a nervous breakdown when she insists on doing her own triage, and is very charmed when she insists on ice cream after taking pain meds at the hospital. On Sansa’s part, she’s a little less concerned about being shot, and a bit more concerned about whatever weird first impression she’s making to her soulmate while high as a kite on pain pills. (this one just needs some tweaking to be postable- I'm not sure if it's going to be a oneshot or a series, but i love what I have already)

- A Demon/Archivist AU (Jonsa)- where Sansa works in the university's historical archives in Oldtown, and is learning to restore old texts with her fellow student and friend, Alleras (Trans Sarella is an amazing concept). When Joffrey Baratheon shows up with a pile of old books from his family's library to donate, Sansa is eager to get away from his sleaze, and accidentally takes one of the books home with her in her rush to leave. Unbeknownst to her, it's more than it appears, and when she leaves it open overnight, she accidentally summons forth Jon- an ancient, powerful, and extremely annoyed demon who is under a curse, and now hers to command. As Jon and Sansa try to get used to this new normal, the Lannisters (unaware that Joffrey had donated the tome) try desperately to find the book and it's owner, wanting Jon's power for themselves, and putting Sansa in considerable danger unless she can figure out how to break Jon's curse. Fortunately, she's a pretty good researcher, even if Jon is initially a bit of a grump. (This is based on a total wish-fulfillment mary-sue type premise for something I wrote when I was thirteen, and I revisited it and wanted to see what it would look like if i took it very seriously, and i am really enjoying it so far. It's a love letter to the terrible, heartfelt writing i was doing in middle school that created the foundations for my writing today, and so much fun).

The one that I am MOST excited about though:

- A Pacific Rim AU!!!! (Ned/Cat, Gendrya, Braime, Sansa/Jon Umber)-Twins Sansa and Robb Stark have always been completely in tune with each other, and when your parents are Jaeger pilots and your mother invented the neural handshake, what option is there but the Jaeger academy? Sansa studies to be an engineer, but ends up copiloting the Jaeger 'Winter Wolf' with her twin brother, after they lose Ned Stark to cancer. When Robb is ripped out of the conn-pod and killed by a kaiju while he's still connected to Sansa, she barely manages to kill the creature before stumbling back to shore, traumatized, grieving, and swearing that she'll never pilot again.

Unfortunately, the Kaiju don't stop just because Sansa does, and when the end of the world is imminent, Marshall Catelyn Stark orders both her daughter and former pilot Jaime Lannister (who lost his twin and copilot, Cersei, several years previously) back to Hong Kong for one final stand. Forced to face both her demons and an irate Arya, furious that Sansa had abandoned the rest of them after Robb's death, Sansa and Arya have to figure out how to pilot Winter Wolf together before the apocalypse comes for them all.

Featuring Marshall Catelyn Stark (commander of the Hong Kong Shatterdome, inventor of the neural handshake, former Jaeger pilot, and BAMF), Sansa x Jon Umber (Yes i know it's a rare pair but i've always kind of loved the idea of them, even though we know so little about him), Kaiju parts dealer and smuggler Petyr Baelish, bickering kaiju biologist Dany and theoretical mathematician Jon Snow, LOCCENT officer Theon, lots of snark, lots of angst and heartfelt conversations, and a weird friendship between snarky-grieving-asshole Jaime Lannister and kind-quiet-grieving Sansa Stark, who are the only two people in the world who know what it's like to lose a copilot and a twin in the drift.

Thanks for reading guys!! There are more, but some of them I just don't know how to explain quite yet, haha. I'd love to hear what you guys think about these!

[dreamties]

Slashers x S/O in a LDR

A/n- Oh, anon! Same hat! Same hat! I’ve considered making something like this a few times, I was so happy to finally make them!! :D

I’m currently working on stuff for Randy Meeks, Kurt Kunkle, and Lester Sinclair- but if there’s still a character you wanted but don’t see here? Feel free to let me know, and I’d be glad to whip something up for them, as well!

Characters: Billy/Stu and Norman Bates

T/W: mostly fluff with a side of abandonment and mommy issues. and some swearing? (is damn a swear word? I used it a lot)

Billy Loomis & Stu Macher

Word  Count: 992

Y’all met in high school- the three of you practically inseparable. But then college happens- and you would’ve loved to stay with Billy and Stu, but the sort of situation arises where you can’t possibly turn away the opportunity. It would be such a mistake, especially for the line of work you’d like to be in. 

And now you may be thinking, Stu’s family is rich rich, right? Couldn’t they just,, buy they’re way in, so you didn’t have to part? Well...I guess they could? These boys aren’t afraid to take what they want, no matter what that entails- but I feel like there might be a lost sense of pride buying their way in. 

...plus...they may or may have not tried...and the school definitely did not accept that shit.

So with that, the three of you end up at different colleges- well, Billy and Stu are at the same place but...you’re so far away 🥺🥺

You’re still in California- but you’re far enough away that they can’t do one to two day trips to see you. It still hurts so much to be apart from them though- especially since both of these boys are so, hmm how to put it...they’re very affectionate and needy (while that last bit may be more so Stu, Billy still fits the Bill on that one).

You only visit each other on holidays and during the summer- and you always stay much longer for the summer.

When Stu sees you again, the first thing he does is wrap you in the biggest, almost suffocating hug- Billy trailing close behind him, laughing at his antics. He basically holds on to you for the entire ride from the airport back to the house (depending on who’s visiting who- but you’ll often come back to Woodsboro, and stay with Stu). 

They think about you all the time when you’re gone. It’s kind of nuts. They’ve got so many other things going on in their lives- they’re still participating in Ghostface murders, they’ve got college and Real jobs ((Stu doesn’t even need a job, but he likes staying close with Billy and having something to do !! He doesn’t like staying by himself too much :(  )) and even with all that? You still end up worming your way into their brains. Collective brainrot over you lmao /j

You call each other everyday- or every other day if schedules are tight. The good thing is...is y’all are both in Cali !! There are no stupid time zones, y’all don’t gotta worry about that >:( 

They want to make sure they know everything that’s been going on with you- even if it’s some boring class, it’s totally worth it just to hear you talk.

There’s lot of them telling you all the things they want to do to/with you when they finally see you. It’s all about the heavy yearning folks. The ache that you feel when you realize you can’t do that right now. And not for a long time. 

You just want to stay with your boys, cuddled on the couch, watching B-rated slasher films. You want to look them in their pretty, perfect eyes, and let your fears and worries melt away, while you tell them how much you love and missed them. And to finally feel your boys’ hairs through your fingers again.

And the crashing, sudden realization, after they drop you off at the airport- and you have your drawn out, tearful goodbyes...the kind you see in movies- that you won’t see them again. Not like that, at least. And not for months. It was back to counting down the days again. Being thankful for every little moment you had with them- and every call, and every weird text message they sent. Allowing every soft, intimate moment away from each other to guide you back home.

Billy’s not great at dealing with his emotions...especially in positive ways. The relationship can definitely be super hard on him, even if he doesn’t really show it. It brings up a lot of his abandonment issues with his mom :( Having you go off to college is losing part of his support system, and it physically pains him to not see you in Woodsboro. You’re part of his little found family with him and Stu. And when you’re not there? Sometimes it feels like he’s lost you. that you’re not coming back from school, and you’re going to have left for good. Which is not true at all, and he knows that...but god damn is it hard to not listen to that dark, nagging voice sometimes. 

And for Stu? He doesn’t mind as much. He doesn’t share this same trauma involved with it that Billy seems to have. But it still hits him in all the wrong places. He’s more likely to show his true emotions than Billy. And that’s actually really good !! He’s able to properly communicate with you whats going, where he’s at with things. 

It can be kind of exhausting trying to translate Billy’s feelings to you- for all parties involved. Or Billy, who’s learned a certain way to communicate that works, and then having to find a new way that makes sense over text and phone calls. Since you can’t see all his body language, and the way he tenses up when he’s filled with Big Emotions. 

TLDR; dealing w/ emotions is tough, doing it via limited technology is harder :(

and y’all know it’s tough on each other- but like hell you’re not gonna make it work with each other. Y’all are meant to be, even if the relationship is in a bit of an odd spot right now. 

You always have to remind the boys that this is only temporary. just until your 4+ years of schooling is over, and then you can move back to Woodsboro. Then you’ll have all the time in the world to plan your lives together.

Norman Bates 

Word Count: 784 

You meet Norman at his motel. You’re just passing through, on your way to a gathering with some of your family. He’s a little odd, but such a gentleman, that you make a note to stay at his motel on the way back home, as well.

Norman’s completely enamored by you, and you say “I’ll see you soon” that first time, he can nearly feel his heart skip a beat. He’s a smiling, happy little mess about it. You wanted to come back here, for him? He can’t wait for it.

Part of him was worried you wouldn’t come back, and that part of him was very scared- but you were so genuine, he could tell you’d be back. For real.

He still finds himself surprised, when a few days later you’re back there. When you leave, you give him your home phone number and address. Letting him know if he was ever going through your town, and he needed a place to stay that...well...he was always welcome at yours.

Y’all aren’t even dating at this point, but you definitely felt this spark- this connection- when you met. It was unlike anything the two of you had ever felt before. So...your relationship starts off slow. It builds overtime. 

It had been a few weeks since you met- with Norman’s work at the motel and whatever work you do, it was hard to find time between it all- but you’re finally able to start weekly phone calls with each other. Catching up with each other, asking him about the motel, and his hobbies...he’s so thrilled when you talk to him about the taxidermy! Not many folks are very er...into it. So it’s a nice surprise for him that the person he likes...cares about what he likes.

Further into y’all’s relationship, the weekly calls will turn into twice a week and sometimes and slowly, slowly melt into sending letters with each other as much as you can. Every few weeks or so, you’d get the sweet pleasure of seeing Norman’s simple letter in your mailbox. Smiling as you spot your name in his nice, neat handwriting.

Often you’ll include clippings from articles or magazines that reminded you of him, and little photos of yourself, your family (and pets if you have any) and critters, and bugs and shots of nature. He loves the ones you send of birds and trees the most- but he keeps every single one you send him. He has a whole drawer full of your letters.

A while into exchanging letters, the two of you begin signing off every one with an “I love you”. It’s not until you see each other in person again that you fully realize your feelings. I mean, they were always there- but it took the pair of you an impossibly long to speak it out loud- to make it official. 

It had been just under a year since you met- and you’re finally back at the Bates motel. There’s no special reason, you’re not seeing family, per se. But you’re starting something you should have started ages ago. Every part of your being is teeming with nervous excitement- what if you had read the letters all wrong? Every I love you, meant as friends?

You're quick to let him know of your arrival- he’s surprised, he didn’t expect you and you wrap each other in a large hug. You don’t let go for sometime, and when you finally do, you still clutch on to his smooth, slender hands. You lean into him, “I’ve missed you.” He looks at you with soft, shiny eyes, lost in your own. You press a subtle kiss to his lips, and pull away soon after. You feel your face get hot, and you can only imagine that Norman’s face would be bright pink.

He doesn’t say anything at first, simply squeezing your hands. “I did, too,” he smiles. It’s so delicate, and you can’t help but hold his face in your hands- studying every little detail. Of course, he sent you photos of himself from time to time- but it wasn’t the same.

The week that you spend with him is magical. When you leave you already find yourself missing the time you had with him- but you suppose that feeling and the wait to see Norman- was worth it. Plus, you still had the phone calls and all the letters with I Love You in them. Besides, with time, you’d be back at his motel- or he’d finally take you up on your offer, and you could finally spend a sunny morning, lazing around cuddled with each other in your bed, in your town.

[firstginger]

I'm not certain if you're still accepting form findings (if not, then my apologies). But would you mind helping me settle on a form for my daemon? I'm an isfp, enneagram 2w1, and virgo sun/libra moon/virgo rising. I'd consider myself to be more imaginative, as I spend a lot of time in my own head daydreaming really convoluted plots. I prefer routine, but I am able to adapt to changes especially when helped by others. I'm a casual worker but also a total perfectionist: quality > quantity. 🌷🐁

I'm not very ambitious but I hold myself to really high standards. There's always been a huge pressure on me to do well and I conform to it as much as possible. I think in a very scattered way (thanks ADHD) but I use outside tools to help myself stay organised. I'm super introverted and I'm only semi-verbal. I shy away from everyone, even loved ones. I have a very hard time expressing my feelings but am a therapist friend for the ppl I know. I love to do things co-op, though I don't trust people very easily. I'd like to think of myself as understanding. Even if I don't believe someone's excuse, I bite my tongue for the sake of keeping peace. I'm quite temperamental, but all my negative mood swings are directed inwards. I'm very anxious and have low energy levels. Sorry for the info dump in your inbox! I just wanted to be in depth. If you could give me a form you think fits, or a form that is opposite/compliments me, I'd love it! Water forms are also appreciated but not req. 🌷🐁

oh this is fun, i don't often consider water forms as they aren't most people's favorites! i'll see if i can give you a few good options here.

my first thought was the vaquita: a small critically endangered species of porpoise that lives off the coast of baja california. they typically travel alone or in pairs, and while they do occasionally move in pods as well, the groups are loosely-formed and typically associated with temporary cooperation rather than permanent group bonds. rather shy, they'll quickly swim away if boats approach. i feel like the vaquita strikes a nice balance between your introversion and desire to help others: they're non-aggressive, tolerant, and even amicable creatures, though are self-sufficient and much less social than other porpoises. their restricted range (even before their dramatic population decrease) and the way they stick to the shores and don't migrate feels similar to your preference to stay within a routine and comfort zone. porpoise forms in general also have traits that may resonate with you: they're more low energy, imaginative sorts of people, very intuitive and sensitive but also not group dependent and more socially fluid. they open up with close friends but tend to be wary of strangers -- particularly the vaquita, which isn't going to have a lot of curiosity for new situations or people outside their immediate group. the only sticking point is that they might be a little too go-with-the-flow and not perfectionistic enough. i think more this person might fear a loss of self-preservation and identity and become anxious in situations where they feel trapped or like too much is being demanded of them... but i don't think they'd have an innate desire for perfection.

i was considering next some crab species! i have to suggest the strawberry hermit crab because they're such cuties; they're pretty sensitive but have a sense of curiosity i think might fit with your imaginative trait. very peaceable types of people who like to explore different ideas and try things out independently... so long as it feels like their choice and is in their comfort zone. they very shy and anxious and withdrawing from anything they feel is a threat. i also honed in on the red reef hermit just because i thought its symbiotic relationship with anemones paired up nicely with you being a therapist friend. they host sea anemones on their shells (typically conches) and will feed them scraps of food; in exchange, the anemone helps protect the hermit crab from predators. this certainly indicates a cooperative type of person, and red reefs are notoriously peaceful and socially tolerant compared to many species of hermit crabs. they're also pretty tenacious and focused, so they might be a little too much of busybodies for you, but i can see hermit crabs in general being self-contained individuals who dwell a lot in their own heads.

the last thought i had were some fish species, and i just kept coming back to seahorses and sea dragons. they (predictably!) have a very low-energy, passive, and intuitive vibe, very much not ambitious but also rather observant when it comes to their personal work. their social aspects seem to fit you well too: socially selective, easy to get along with, and slow to trust but settles into close relationships. their level of cooperation fits too; they're very agreeable to cooperation, especially when it means the best possible outcome. they're not adventurous and i would absolutely describe them as more imaginative, but i think then you run into the fact they're not terribly dutiful. they're not motivated by success. while they tend to be reliable, this is the type of person who's more interested in talking about possibilities than following through. they can be anxious and easily overwhelmed, and sometimes it's easier to not force yourself to take on more than you can chew. however their demeanors are pretty patient and calm, and i think it would take a lot to get them riled up. otherwise, i was thinking maybe something in the cichlid family? an angelfish might be up your alley as they're more sensitive, anxious, and dutiful... more selectively social and take a while to warm up, and don't enjoy change or diversion from their routine. i think cichlids might combine your introversion/anxiety with your temperamental nature. the blood red parrot cichlid, for example, is a species i'd see as very shy and reclusive but tolerant, though can become stressed and reach a boiling point.

ope this got long, i'm going to cut it off here but if you're looking for some non-aquatic forms (the strawberry hermit is terrestrial but needs access to saltwater) definitely send me another message! or let me know if these forms are a close in some ways and not in others, and i can try to refine things down even more for you! :)

[thedanceronthestreets]

PEDRO PASCAL GQ GERMANY - OCTOBER 2020

Original text by Esma Annemon Dil

Fotos by Doug Inglish

Styling by Simon Robins

Translated by @thedanceronthestreets

Intro: A broken tooth could almost have been the reason for our meeting with Pedro Pascal to be cancelled - and with that our conversation about roots, his new movie and times of change. 

Interview: It is almost eery how empty the streets of Los Angeles are under the gleaming sun. While Europe is finding its "new normal", people in L. A. are cutting their own hair even without being neurotics. Many of them have not seen their friends in half a year. The pandemic is out of control. So are the reactions to the situation. Inviting someone to a "distance drink" in the backyard can lead to the same consternation as proposing a relationship partner exchange. 

All the more of a surprise was Pedro Pascal's immediate confirmation. To the drink, not the partner exchange. He is one of the winners this year - and if Corona had not forced the movie industry to go on a holiday, he probably would not have had the time for this drink. After "Game of Thrones", the series in which his head was squished, followed 2015 the leading role in "Narcos" as a DEA agent on the hunt for Pablo Escobar, and now the leap onto the big Hollywood screen. As of 1. October the Chilean will appear in the blockbuster "Wonder Woman 1984". Furthermore, the second season of the "Star Wars" series "The Mandalorian" will start in October with him as the main character - unfortunately underneath the helmet. But we all seem to be under the same helmet in 2020. It is this man we want to meet, who worked as a waiter in New York a couple of years ago. Whose parents are political refugees that settled in Texas, and one day their son decided to walk into a drama club in high school. 

And then the cancellation. While we were preparing the house and garden for Pedro's drink and fashion shoot, which isn't an easy task under L. A.'s restrictions, his management called in with terrible news: Pedro has - no, not Corona - had to receive emergency surgery due to a sore tooth and is now lying in bed with a swollen cheek, making talking or shooting impossible. The sun shines onto empty streets. And our empty garden. 

A few days later, he stands in front of the door anyway, no huge bulge in his face, but stitches in his gum. No limousine service that dropped him off, he arrived in his own car and picked up his makeup artist on the way. He helps her to carry in all the equipment and states first and foremost: "I've got time today!" What a star! It does not seem like we are about to ask him how he managed to become a Hollywood sensation, but rather him asking us that question. Pedro Pascal! So, what kind of star is he then? 

Pedro Pascal: Sorry for ruining your plans. The operation was a total emergency. 

GQ: Really? We were wondering whether the swelling was the result of a secret trip to the plastic surgeon. Apparently, because of the quarantine in Hollywood, their schedules are packed. 

Sorry to disappoint you. A few days before our appointment I raced to the hospital with a tooth fracture and the worst pain I've ever felt - a hospital where the severe Corona cases are treated. I was unable to contact any dentists! Right before I parked, a specialist called back. I'll spare you the details of the surgery, gruesome. The pain was excruciating despite the 10 anaesthetic shots. The doctor said I wasn't the only one going through this, a lot of people grind their teeth at night thanks to stress. 

What are you most afraid of at the moment? 

The way the government is handling the pandemic scares me more than the virus itself. The lack of intelligent crisis management is a moral disgrace. The leadership crisis makes orphans out of all of us - we're left to fend for ourselves. 

How have you spent the last few months? 

With frozen pizza in jogging trousers in Venice Beach. I live in a rear building that's in the garden belonging to a family. In reality there are enough good takeout restaurants around that area, but for some reason I like salami pizza from the supermarket. 

That doesn't exactly sound like the movie star lifestyle. What does it feel like to be forced from top speed to zero? 

Considering the things happening in this world, my own state really isn't the top priority. But I would have to lie, if I said I wasn't disappointed. The entire cast and crew of "Wonder Woman 1984" put so much heart and soul into the production. We had so much fun on set. I had hoped to carry this feeling of exuberance around the globe to the openings of this movie. 

You are part of a political, socialist family that fled the Pinochet regime in Chile. What do you remember from back then? 

My sister and I were born in Chile, but I was only nine months old when we claimed asylum in Denmark. From there, we moved to San Antonio in Texas, where my dad worked as a doctor in a hospital. 

Texas isn't exactly considered to be socialist utopia. How well did you settle in? 

San Antonio isn't a cowboy city but rather very diverse with large Asian, Afro-American and Latino communities. In my memory it's a romantic place, culturally inclusive. The cultural shock only hit when we moved to Orange County in California later. Suddenly, the environment was white, preppy and conservative. 

How were you welcomed in California? 

To this day I'm ashamed when I think about how I let my classmates call me Peter without correcting them. I'm Pedro. Even without growing up in Chile, the country and language are part of me. I was quite unhappy in that place. At least I was able to switch schools and visit one in Long Beach, where I felt more comfortable. With its theatre programme, I found my path. 

Could you visit your family's homeland as a child? 

Yes, after my parents ended up on a list of expats that were permitted to re-enter the country. First, there was a big family gathering, then me and my sister were parked at some relatives' place for a few months while my parents returned to Texas. They probably needed a break from us. They'd had us at a very young age, had a vibrant social life, and my mother was doing her doctorate in psychology. 

Was your mother a typical young psychologist that tested her knowledge at home? 

You mean whether I was her lab rat? Absolutely. I can remember weird sessions camouflaged as games, where someone would watch my reactions to different toys. Even though I couldn't have been older than 6, I knew what was happening. My favourite thing was to be asked about my dreams. That was always a great opportunity to make up fantastic stories. 

Was that your first performance? 

Definitely! My strong imagination alarmed my mother, because I'd rather live in my fantasy world than in real life. I didn't like school. I ended up in the "problematic kid" category. At some point the subjects got more interesting and my grades improved. So many children are unnecessarily diagnosed with learning disabilities without considering that school can be daunting. Why is it acceptable to be bored out of your mind in class, when there are more stimulating ways to convey knowledge?

With everything happening in the world this summer: Do you believe that social hierarchy structures are genuinely being reconsidered? 

Hopefully. After the lockdown my first contact with people was at the Black Lives Matter protest. The atmosphere was peaceful and hopeful until the police got involved and provoked violence. At least during these times we can't avoid problems or distract ourselves from them as easily as we usually do. It seems that the pandemic provided us with a new sense of clarity: we don't want to go on like this. 

The trailer of "Wonder Woman 1984" represents the optimism of the 80s. That almost makes one feel nostalgic nowadays. 

That holds true. It's two hours of happiness. Patty Jenkins, the director, managed to make a movie full of positive messages. We shot in Washington, D. C., then in London and Spain - which now sounds like a different time. 

Do you miss travelling? 

I've only now realised what a privilege it is to just pack up your things and fly anywhere. With an American passport you can travel freely. And that's why the small radius we live in now is kind of absurd. Over the last few years I often retreated in between takes, because I was always on the road and overstimulated. Friends complained about how comfortable I had become. We all took social interactions for granted and realise now how reliant we are on human connection. Now, I wistfully think about all the party and dinner invitations I declined in the past. 

In L. A., people spend more time indoors or in nature than in other metropolises. Could this city become your safe haven after New York City? 

My true home is my friends. Ever since I was young I've lived the life of a nomad and haven't set roots anywhere. Until recently, my physical home was a place for arriving and leaving and hence I didn't want to overcomplicate living by owning lots of things. The opposite actually: Without having read Marie Kondo's book, I got rid of all the stuff that was unnecessary and lived a very minimalistic lifestyle. 

Is there something you collect or could never say goodbye to? 

Books! I still own the literature I read during my teen and university years. Recently I found a box of old theatre scripts and materials back from my uni days at NYU. I can't separate from art either, same as lamps or old pictures. Furniture and clothes are no problem though, they can be chucked. 

Do you remember any roles that were defined by their costumes? 

Yes, "Game of Thrones" comes to mind immediately. During that time I first understood what it means, as an actor, to be supported by a look. I owe that to costume designer Michele Clapton. She developed these very feminine robes and brocade cloaks for my role that looked very masculine when I wore them. I felt sexy in them. And very important were of course Lindy Hemming's power suits and Jan Sewell's blond hair for the tycoon villain Maxwell Lord in "Wonder Woman 1984". Relating to the style, I couldn't really see myself in the role since the shapes and colours of the 80s don't really fit my body. My type is the 70s.

Do you adopt such inspirations into your private closet? 

At this point in time, I'll choose any comfortable outfit over a cool look. Sometimes I mourn the days when I defined myself with fashion. It's a bit mad when I think about how, in the 90s as a teenager, I would go to raves; a proper club kid with crazy outfits: overalls, chute trousers, soccer shirts and a top hat like in "The cat in the hat knows a lot about that!" by Dr Seuss. Later in NYC I was part of a group that placed immense value on wearing a certain style. The fact that I only walk around in joggers nowadays is actually unacceptable! 

Normally, actors who work on comic screen adaptations become bodybuilders and eat ten boiled chicken breasts per day. You don't? 

My body wouldn't be able to handle that. I find it difficult enough to maintain a minimum level of fitness. As of your mid 40s, you suddenly need a lot more discipline. Until the tooth incident happened, I worked out a couple of times a week with a trainer to keep the quarantine body in shape. 

What would annoy you the most, if you were your own roommate? 

I can be very bossy. I have to gather all my goodwill not to force my movie choice on to everyone else. When I want something, I'm not passive aggressive about it, I attack head on. Also, I can get caught up in tunnel vision: When i feel down, I can't imagine that I'm ever going to feel better again. I have difficulty with seeing the bigger picture when experiencing problems or emotions. Method acting really wouldn't be my thing. That's why I try to only work on projects that feel good and where people encourage and lift each other up. 

While you were trying on the outfits you pointed out a lack of self-esteem. How does that coincide with your career? 

Isn't it interesting how traits and circumstances go hand in hand? Self-esteem comes from the inside, but it's also influenced by what society believes. We use critical stares from the outside against ourselves. I lived in New York for 20 years, I studied there and worked as a waiter up until my mid 30s, because I couldn't live off acting. It was always so close. The disappointment of always just barely missing a perfect part or opportunity is exhausting. When is the right time to stop trying and what's plan b? That's not just a question actors ask themselves, but anybody who struggles to earn a livelihood - unrelated to how much potential they have or how close their dream may seem. We are beginning to see now how our narrow definition of success is destroying our communities. At the same time, it's becoming obvious that, until this day, your family background and skin colour determine your chances of living a dignified existence. 

What are the positives of becoming a leading man later in life? 

I have the feeling that I've got control over my life - without the pressure of having to accept projects or be a social media personality. That surely also has to do with the fact that I'm a man. Women are surely pressured to appear quirky at any age. 

Life is always a management of risks - especially at this time. For what would you risk losing something? 

Usually, if you don't play the game you're not going to win anything. That applies to friendship, love, work, creativity. Anything that really means something to me, is worth the risk. 

Wonder woman 1984 will appear in cinemas 01.10. The 800 million dollar earning DC comic franchise is moving into the New York 80s with its sequel. It looks spectacular - only Pedro Pascal with blond hair in a three piece Wall Street suit looks better.

[jimalim]

Based off @idontlikedots wonderful Christmas holiday headcanons post! I hope you don't mind I had a little fun expanding! Note: I wrote this/and posting this from my phone cause it's Christmas morning and I'm too tired to get out my laptop. Enjoy!

...

It was their first holiday off the island, well technically second. Though they were so engrossed in bureaucracy and legal shit they hadn't even noticed the season passed. This year, they all agreed to get together to celebrate.

It was a rather easy task considering the large number of girls. Most had paired off since leaving the island in various forms of living arrangements. Shelby and Toni the obvious couple got a place together after Shelby was legally emancipated from her bigoted parents. Nora and Rachel found a nice studio apartment, that although they aren't really on speaking terms, their parents help pay for. A kind of way to apologize to their daughters for their mistakes. It doesn't really move the needle, but Rachel gladly accepts the money as a form of reparation. Fatin followed through on her plan to sell what remained of her father's fancy watches and got a place in California, the one they were currently gathered in today. She asked Dot to move in with her partially because of their conversation on the island, though mostly because Fatin couldn't be alone following all they went through. Leah was the only one of the group of either who decided to finish school and pursue higher education at a college nearby Fatin and Dot's place. Though she lives on campus, she's almost always at the girls condo. Martha chose to stay with her family, really needing the connection after being gone for so long. She rediscovered her love for dancing and has been teaching at the rec three days a week.

None of the girls were super religious, even Shelby's faith has been a work in progress. Trying to find the balance that best works for her is an ongoing affair. But the holiday was still something they enjoyed celebrating. The time spent together and the gifts exchanged. It was all about their new found family, and the love they had for each other.

Martha and Shelby spend most of the day in the kitchen cooking and baking. The two excitedly shared recipes they'd found online back and forth the past month planning the menu for today. Toni spends most of her time in the kitchen as well, though refusing to do any work, just wanting to spend time with her two favorite people in the world. It's funny how much she loves how well they get along, when she thinks back to how much she hated it those first few weeks on the island. When the cookies finish cooling Martha pushes, "make yourself useful, your girlfriend will appreciate it." Shelby throws her a wink so Toni obliges.

Leah spent weeks decorating the place in between classes and in the evenings much to Faitn and Dot's chagrin. Her obsessive behavior, though being channeled into something good for a change, could still be annoying as hell. Especially when the girls jusy wanted to relax for the night. Leah would force them to help her hang all kinds of lights and garland and art. There was always a point where they'd just go to bed, leaving Leah to her own devices. They even made her a spare key so she could work while they were out, in hopes they wouldn't have to help. A decision they are still unsure if they should regret.

When the twins arrive, Rachel is quick to gather everyone up so she can hand out the gift she'd brought for the girls. "We're doing gifts after dinner!" Shelby objected at first, all it took was for Toni to whisper something in her ear for her to visibly perk up and agree.

Matching holiday sweatshirts! A tradition she explained thay Nora and her were forced to take part in growing up, as twins. "As silly as it is, I look back at all those photos and it reminds me how close and important our sibling relationship is," Rachel go's on as she pulls Nora into a side hug, "and you're all my family, my sisters, I want to share that with you." There's not a dry eye in the place. Fatin immediately jumps up to run off to fix her makeup, though not before hugging Rachel and Nora tightly.

Hugs all around as everyone is finally gathered! Dot breaks out her homemade mulled wine, which is so fucking good the girls rave! The music is turned up, Oh Holy Night leading off the playlist, Dot raises a glass in a silent toast. "He'd be really proud, you know." She hears Fatin whisper next to her, her glass also raised. They clink their glasses and drink together whole the other girls spread across the open concept space excitedly chat and catch up.

When the food is finished and the tables all set, the girls eagerly fill their plates. Shelby says a quick prayer to herself, though not of the other girls eat till she does out of respect. Even Toni holds her hand as she does for support. She's insanely proud of how much Shelby has grown and admires the way she devotes herself to the greater good, even if she's still working on what it all means to her.

They put on their sweaters after dinner and take several silly and nice group pictures. An affair that takes ages with how many of them there are to satisfy. Throughout the whole day Toni had been surprising Shelby with mistletoe kiss attacks, which the girl always enjoyed. "You know you don't need that to kiss your girlfiend." Fatin deadpans.

"True. But I do for this!" Toni laughs as she holds the plant above her and Fatins head and places a kiss in her cheek. Fatin rools her eyes, "oh no, no." And pulls Toni in and kisses her properly, showing her how it's done. All the girls laugh merciliessly at Toni's shocked demeanor. She all but runs into Shelby's arms who was laughing along with them. She kisses Toni and reassures her it's all good, fully understanding the whole things a joke.

Fatin, now graced with the mistletoe decides to have some fun. She stalks around the girl's tauntingly like she's playing duck duck goose. She settles on Leah and to her surprise the girl is almost eager in her kiss. Really playing it up for the crowd, earning several "ow owws!"  Amongst the giggles. She may have had too much of Dot's wine already.

Fatin's next mark is Nora. A short but sweet kiss. When Fatin turns her attention to Rachel, she objects "I'm not kissing you after you just kissed my sister. Too close man." This makes the rest of the girls, Nora included loose it! Martha calls an end to the silly game by announcing she has a boyfriend. News that makes all the girls squeal in excitement, a reveal that not even Toni was privileged too. They immediately all start asking questions and cooing over how sweet he sounded.

Fatin notices Dot leave the room, walking down the hall. She follows her without the girls even looking up. Dot, sitting on her bed looks a little flustered. Fatin sits next to her, "hey, what's going on?"

Dot is embarrassed by how upset she is over something so silly, and doesn't want to explain it. She tried to shrug it off, but Fatin places a hand on her knee and it makes her weak. She caves, "you didn't kiss me, I don't know, seeing you kiss everyone else, I guess I just felt left out" It's a quiet admission. So much that if they weren't sitting as close as they were, Fatin might have missed it.

They've gotten so close since living together, Fatin doesn't need to ask her to clarify anything. She knows why it's really upsetting her. So she suck it up and admits something of her own, "Dottie," the use of the nickname is reserved for serious moments, and Dot is aware of this fact so she immediately has her attention, eyes focused on her roomamte as she continues, "I didn't kiss you because I actually WANT to kiss you. I didn't want it to be some joke. I want it to be special."

Dot visibly blushes at this and Fatin gently strokes her thumb across her cheek. "I'd like to take you out, on a proper date. Do it the old fashion way." She nods in agreement to the proposition, and Fatin kisses her cheek before standing up, hand extended to help Dot off the bed.

After opening gifts, the girls all cuddle around the TV watching Christmas movies, drinking spiked cocoa and eating cookies. Leah falls asleep halfway through the second movie. The girls put a Santa hat on her head and draw a beard on her face. They take a couple photos and giggle, before returning their attention to the movie marathon.

Rachel gently cleans the marker off Leah's face (which is much easier because she convinced them to use a dry erase marker instead of a sharpie like Toni wanted) and covers her up with a blanket.

Shelby gathers everyone's empty mugs during the transition to the 4th movie and takes them to the kitchen. Toni follows shortly behind to have a moment of alone time with her girlfriend. "Hey." She whispers in Shelby's ear as she hugs her from behind. "You were amazing today. Thank you for the food, and the gifts."

Shelby hums as she turns in Toni's arms so she can see her girlfriends face. "Well I do have one more small gift for you at home, so you'll just have to wait."

Toni pulls her in for a kiss and holds her close. "I love you." It's the first time she's said it. Though they've been together for a long while. They both were really trepidstious with how to pace things. Their life in the island was a totally different set of circumstances. They both needed to really learn who they were off the island after all that trauma before dicing head first into their relationship. Shelby going through a long and rough emancipation battle, while Toni waited to age out of the foster care system. They had many demons to face, ones they had to face alone.

They took things very very slow in the beginning. Only ramping things up once paperwork was finalized and they were legally set to move away and start an new life together. They were still cautious, taking each day one at a time. But the feelings Toni have been cultivating, have been there from the beginning.

Shelby grins wide, not even self conscious about her teeth not being in at this time of night. Her smile as bright and beautiful as with them on, hell even more so. "I love you too." They kiss again, full of passion and trust. Toni pulls apart to suggest they "get out of here" as much as Shelby wants to oblige, she reminds Toni that all the girls agreed to a sleepover. "Come on, it's not like it's the first time we've left them hanging." Toni poles reminded of the time on the island they were tasked to find food, finding the lychee tree, and then having their own feast, so to say, before sharing.

Shelby giggles at the memory, "meet me in Dot's room in 5." Before walking back into the living room, noting Rachel had fallen asleep her head atop Leah's. Martha too was out, Nora next to her looking like she could go next.

When it's just Dot and Fatin awake and watching the movies, Dot questions "so I'm just supposed to be cool with them having sex in my room?" All too aware the couple disappeared.

"Shh, you can stay in mine tonight. I could use some extra warmth." Fatin winks before cuddling up closer into Dot's side and wrapping an arm around her waist.

Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!