#even if you're the one who unfriended me first

[lycorisicecream]

why do you care so much about some shitty game you can't even play.

Because it's cool and interesting to me? I don't know whether you're talking about MO4 (has some translated stuff and a decent sized fandom so I know what's going on and stuff) or 数字のヤツら (has some animation memes, but otherwise I don't know much about it but it still looks cool to me and one of the core reasons why I'm trying to learn Japanese atm) but still, I don't get what you're trying to get out of this

Besides, I technically can play both games as I have working PC atm

It's just the language barrier preventing me, but with enough devotion from either myself (learning Japanese, which will probably take me a few years) or others (translators who patch the game and make it available in English, unlikely for 数字のヤツら to get a translation though as it isn't really that popular) I'll be able to play

Also if I didn't care about translation quality I could just use something like Google Translate on my phone and play that way

[unproduciblesmackdown]

another day another "applying the concept 'disposability' to 'someone withdraws from a personal relationship, & that wasn't signed off on by the other'" kill me

[yuyu1024]

Watermelon

Pairings: Wooyoung x Y/N

Genre/tags: friends to...?

Warning: fluff, smut 🔞, cursing, pet names (babes, baby, love, honey, noona etc), protected/unprotected sex (be safe everyone)

~~~ [lmk if i miss anything]

Words: 2.7k

Disclaimer:

- this story is just made up

- english is not my first language, please be nice 😊

A/N: something from drafts ✨️

Masterlist

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"Since when did you start wearing make up?" Wooyoung asks as he finds you at Jongho's kitchen, cutting watermelons for the boys.

You pause mid cut and look back at him, leaning on the doorway whilst holding a can of beer in hand. "I'm not in the mood today." You snarl, rolling your eyes. "I'm busy."

He snorts a chuckle. You can hear him walk. But instead of walking away, he appoaches you. "Red is your color..." he says, tilting his head to the side to see your face.

You sigh. "What do you want?" You sound irritated.

He puts his beer on the counter top and leaned his loweback on the edge. "You stopped responding to me..." he crosses his arm around his torso. "I thought we are building something special between us..."

"I don't know what you're talking about..." you utter even though YOU DO know what he meant.

Since the beginning of summer, you and Wooyoung have been... close. You text and call each other. The normal. Like what usually friends do.

However, you and him are not like this before. He is a friend of your friend, Jongho. And so he became friends with you and your circle too. But still... you two are not there yet.

But then lately, he have been making efforts with you. And you thought it was cool and nice since you want to be close with him too coz he is friendly. But little did you know, he likes to be a little TOO friendly. You are blinded by his sweet words that you almost missed it.

And when you noticed that he's after you, not just to be friends. You suddenly got timid with him. You limit your contact with him.

Of course you are doing this not to be mean and unfriend him. It's just a precaution. You know yourself. If you continued it, this something between you too is danger. And you're not sure you can handle just being one of his girls.

"Are you sure?" His voice sounds so evil and yet so alluring.

You even felt him move closer to you that his skin from his arm touches your exposed arm as well. You pray that your body does not react to expose you. But thats not even what you should be worried about. Coz Wooyoung could tell. Weirdly enough, He knows you a lot more than you think.

"Stop..." you look at him.

"Stop what?" He arches a brow.

"That!" You sound irritated. "I'm not in the mood okay? I can't play with your games and shit."

You finally finished cutting the watermelons. You throw the knife and cutting board in the sink.

"Here..." you push the bowl of watermelon to Wooyoung. "Give it to the guys..."

He looks at you confused and dumbfounded but at the same time amused. "Okay." He softly answer. "Talk to you later then." He smiles and leaves you in the kitchen

***

The whole house is loud. The boys are playing games and having bets who would win. And of course, the loser would be the one assigned in washing all the dishes. Exlcuding you and Wooyoung as you two did the cooking and the prep earlier with Seonghwa.

"I win!" Yunho yells overjoyed.

"Aah! I'm safe!" Hongjoong, Yeosang and San said at the same time.

That is leaving Yeosang and Jongho in dishwashing duties.

"But it's my house!" Jongho tries to appeal

"That's more reason for you to be nice to your guests." Seonghwa answers. "Just go and clean..." he pats both males shoulder. "Go on..."

"This is unfair." Jongho pouted

"What's unfair is me and Y/N lost the ladder game for the room. Now we have no choice but to sleep in the scary ass basement room...on that one big ass mattress." Wooyoung says before chugging his beer

(Scary basement because its Jongho's old brother's office that they turned into a guest bedroom. But the vibes is not very welcoming since its not yet decorated properly)

Fuck. You lost the game and you can't react nor beg for anyone to exchange with you. You don't want to cause an issue and make them feel that something is wrong. Because in the first place, nothing is wrong. Technically. You are just....... cautious with Wooyoung because you don't want to have more feelings for him.

Yes he is your friend. But being a girl surrounded by hot men that are your friends, for sure you are bound to have infatuation with one of them. And unlucky you... it is wooyoung. The guy who keeps hitting on you.

"Try not to snore too much, Woo! Y/N needs her beauty sleep." San says

"And turn off your phone okay?" Seonghwa puts his arm around you. "Stop thinking about that guy..."

Wooyoung glances at you and Hwa "What guy?"

You then poke Seonghwa on his stomach with your elbows. "I'm already over him. Stop mentioning it."

Hwa laughs at your reaction. "Are you really?" He pats your head like a big brother that he is for you.

"Do we know this guy?" San asks

"Not really..." Jongho answers as he walk pass to grab his phone. "He is a football player from a different school..." and then goes back to the kitchen.

"And how did you know this guy?" Wooyoung asks trying not to sound bitter or jealous

"It's in the past." You mumble trying not to make them anymore curious. But since Wooyoung is already heated deep down because of the fact that there is another guy interested in you that you never mentioned before.

"Tell us more." He says to hwa

"Well... we met the guy when Y/N came to watch with me... coz a childhood friend of mine is going to that uni. We met them and his team... and this guy... who is famous in their school... liked Y/N..."

"And then what happened?" San scoots over and giving you a teasing smile.

"Nothing happened..." you answer as you pinch his cheek.

"The guys schedule is too hectic to even have time for Y/N... so... she decided to let it go." Hwa adds

"Why do you know all of this? And none of us did?" Wooyoung asks

You glance at him and saw his expression. He looks a little hurt.

"Let's not talk about it okay?" You stand up and hop over the boys legs. "I'm going to shower now... let's move on and you guys go ahead to your rooms... it's late... I need to sleep."

"Fine...." San pouts as he gets up as well. "You can chat about it some other time."

"No..." you stick your tongue out and make your way upstairs to get your things and shower.

***

"What is that guy's name?"

You haven't even had the chance to lay down properly yet, Wooyoung is already asking question about the guy Hwa mentioned.

"Do you text him a lot? Are you still in contact with him?"

"Wooyoung..."

"Are you not in the mood because of him? Are you not texting or calling me back because... OF him?"

You sigh as you put your feet and legs under the thick blanket. "Like I said... it's in the past. We stopped texting like sweet and flirtatious... like late last year..."

"Sweet and fliratious...?" He repeats under his breathe. "But do you still talk to him?"

"From time to time... yes..."

Wooyoung slams his phone on the nightstand and gets under the sheets, turning his back on you.

"What's your problem?"

"You."

"Me? What did I do?!"

He then gets up, startling you and then climbs on top of you. You were about to squeal but he covered your mouth before you could even.

"You are avoiding me... trying to get to know you more... and yet you had this... thing with a football player?"

You bite his finger making him hiss and move a little off you. "You should know why!" You snap back at him. "We are friends... you are not supposed to do what you do with your exes to me."

He frowns. "What does that supposed to mean? And who the fuck said that I am going to treat you like my exes?"

"No one..."

"So you just made that up? And assumed I am the bad guy?"

"Can you blame me? Look at your dating profile. None of them lasted three months."

"Thats because they all cheated on me!" He says exasperatedly then flopping back to bed. "I guess you're not that interested with me coz you don't try to ask for facts..."

You got silenced. You didn't know. You didn't bothered asking around.

"And also... I don't just go around and fuck around... I may look like I have a reputation.. but I respect women okay? And I am a romantic guy..."

You still don't speak up. You just stare at the ceiling and let him talk.

"So... all this time... you assumed that I am just going to play around?" He asks

You look away. "Yes."

He gets up to sit and look at you. "What the fuck?"

You then get up too. "I'm sorry okay? But can you blame me? That's all I know from you...well regards to your dating okay? and the way you text me... its giving..  fuck boy."

"A fuck boy?" He laugh. "How do I even text you? What do I do to give that vibes?" He's not sure if he is offended or being complimented. He just laughs it off  "Seonghwa is right..." he continues. "Even though you hang out with us... a bunch of guys... you are still a girl... not that I am.. trying to say girls are very dramatic and overthinking...but ya know..."

You glare at him. "Fine. I am. And so what?" You roll your eyes

"Nothing...I'm just saying... plus I don't give damn."

"What? What does that supposed to mean?"

Wooyoung looks at you. A small smile on his lips. "I still like you... even you labelled me as a player."

"Shut up." You hit him with your pillow

"Hey! I am serious."

"I am too!" You hit him again. "Shut up!"

"Shut up or else what?"

You press your lips together and stare at him. Unsure what to say.

But you are glad though that he sort of cleared a few things about him. Your misconception about him. Which is your fault too. You judged him a little too much because you try to find things to hate about him so that you would not step over the boundry that you're trying to avoid.

"Y/N... do you like me or not?" He suddenly asks. "Just tell me... and if you say no... I will stop. I'll go back to the old Wooyoung... not caring and texting you everyday... or wanting your attention..."

You sigh

"And don't give me the bullshit that you thought we are just friends thing. Okay? You know what we've been doing these past few months. We are texting and calling each other, yes... but... I know how we do skinship had evolved." He moves closer. "I know how you felt whenever we cuddle during movie nights... and whenever my lips brushed over your ears as I hug you closer..." he is now centimeters away from you and you are not moving away. "C'mon sweety... just be honest." He smirks

Oh you hate that smirk. You hate it because he already knows but he is still asking you. He wants you to say the obvious.

"Fuck you!" You mutter before launching yourself to him.

You are kissing him and he is kissing you back. And as you two continue to suck each others lips off your faces, the more your bodies react with the friction and the touches that you are giving.

"Touch me more..." you breathe out. "Please..."

Wooyoung is on top of you, grinding his pelvis on to your covered area. His hands are busy grabbing your ass or your hips. His grind is hard and making sure even with all of those layers of cloth. You could feel his errection ready to penetrate in you.

"You sound so divine..." he hums as he continues to give you wet kisses all over your neck

"Ahh fuck..." you grab onto his hair and pull it so he could look back at you. "This is so wrong... we are friends..."

"Friends my ass..." he smirks. "We're definitely leveling up after this." and goes back to nibbling your skin and leaving kiss marks all over.

He undresses himself totally, throwing his pajamas somewhere while for you, only your shorts and undies are off. He did put the thick blanket over you two as you still feel a little bit shy being this exposed to him. He understands.

"I'll take care of you..." he whispers, kissing the back of your hand. "What will you say if it hurts?"

"Watermelon." Your voice is so soft and weak. You sound nervous. You are not a virgin but of course, the though of fucking your friend still lingers in your brain. It's a new experience.

"Good..." he gives you a long, sweet smooch before he lowers his body closer to you. "I will put it in now... okay?"

"Okay..."

Easing himself in, the stretch is already making your eyes roll at the back of your head. It fucking feels good. He moves his hips slower first to get you adjusted to his size. And while your brain is rotting from the sensation he is also begins exploring your mouth with his tongue.

Oh, That sharp tongue he has. Who knew that he's not just a smart ass, naughty and blunt guy with his words but also this brilliant with kissing.

"Ohh..." you suck in your breathe when you feel him hit the spot. "Oh fuck..." your mouth drops open unable to say any words out as he continues to hit it

"Shit!" He hisses as he felt you tighten. "Your squeezing me..." he lowers his body to embrace you. "Shit... I'm close..."

You wrap your arms around his shoulder and kiss the curve of his neck. "Can you... come in me?"

His cheeks heats up hearing your words. That made his dick twitch. He likes the way you said. "Are you sure?"

You nod. "Please? Don't worry... I'm on birth control. I just... I want to feel it... everything..."

Wooyoung bites his lips, supressing a blushing smile. "Fuck... why do you sound so sexy saying that?"

His dick felt the rush from your words. He continued to thrust fast and strong until you both reached the end goal. Both of you came and flops down to the bed like you hiked Mt. Everest in a day.

"That was amazing..." he proudly smiles. "Are you okay? How are you feeling?"

You cover yourself with the blanket and lay on your side facing him. "I'm okay..." you smile. "I'm sleepy now..." you trail off. "I've never been this tired after having sex before..."

His eyebrows twitches. "Coz you haven't had the taste of me... that's why." He leans over and kisses you on the cheek. "And please... don't mention any of your exes... I'd want them to be erased in your memory... you have me now. Just me... okay?"

Slowly your eyes closes. "Hmmm..." you answer. "Whatever you say..."

He snorts a weak laugh as he watches you slowly go to sleep without even realizing it.

"You're so fucking cute." He says

Wooyoung covers you more, hiding your disheveled and after sex state. Then he gets up to fix himself up so he can sleep next to you. But then, after a few heart beats he hears someone walking down the stairs.

"Yah... seriously... you two should've atleast closed the door." He softly says. It was Seonghwa who looks a bit shookt and worried.

Wooyoung smirks. "Are we that loud?"

"Loud enough to be heard in the living room. You are lucky the rest of the guys are upstairs and Jongho's parents are not here."

"Sorry... we are just..."

"Hush. I am not judging... we already know the things between you two... its kinda obvious..." Seonghwa yawns. "Next time.... just do it when we are not around okay? Just go fucking date or whatever." He turns around and takes a sip of his warm milk. "Also... make it official okay... like say it. You know Y/N likes things to he clear. Don't do what the other guy did." He says before leaving the basement room.

"I will." Wooyoung answers before laying beside you and giving you a kiss on the cheek.

[thatfandomslut]

No Matter What

Regine George x Reader

Word Count: 1.1k

Trigger Warning: insecurity

Request:

Valentine's / Follower Celebration Request; Regina George w/ quote 51 and piece of chocolate 5. Or: “In my opinion, the best thing you can do is find someone who loves you for exactly what you are. Good mood, bad mood, ugly, pretty, handsome, what have you.” w/ arguing

Valentine's / Follower Celebration Requests are closed.

"So, what happened?" Cady asked as she passed (Y/n) the glass of water from her counter. What is usually the time that Cady takes to tutor (Y/n) has turned into a therapy session since (Y/n) and Regina are arguing. This was a very rare occasion as they typically settled things in private but Regina brought Karen and Gretchen into it, so (Y/n) has come to Cady. Hence why there was a math book and homework, that was twenty-five percent finished, scattered on the table.

(Y/n) accepted the water gratefully, sighing as she wiped the tears streaming down her cheeks. "I told her I felt uncomfortable with her relationship with Shane Omen. I never said they couldn't be friends. I wouldn't ever tell anyone who to be friends with or they couldn't be friends with. However, she does that for me all the time. That's why I felt like I had the right to at least let her know that the way she was still friends with her ex-boyfriend, the boy she cheated on Aaron with, makes me uncomfortable. Maybe I'm just insecure, but them having a relationship worries me." (Y/n) explained, hoping she didn't sound bitter.

There was a hum that escaped Cady as she listened, nodding carefully. (Y/n) She could see that she was thinking, which made her dread that maybe she had no one on her side. "I understand your worries. I wouldn't feel comfortable either. I think it's actually very healthy to establish boundaries. I also don't think it's fair that Regina has made you unfriend people and then get mad when you express your discomfort with her and Shane." Cady sat beside her, putting a comforting hand on her arm. (Y/n) felt validated by Cady's words, happy to finally have someone who sees the disagreement from her point of view.

"I feel like it wouldn't matter if she didn't cheat on someone else with him. I don't care that she's friends with Aaron or her other exes. It's just Shane." (Y/n) told Cady, leaning back in her seat. She felt a bit embarrassed by how insecure she was, but she knew Cady wasn't judging her. "I just sometimes don't even feel good enough for Regina. Then, I find out she's hanging out with Shane Omen. What am I supposed to think? I know it's bad for me. I'm supposed to trust her. I do trust her. I'm just being insecure. I just really love her."

Cady rubbed her back softly. She understood what (Y/n) was saying. Oftentimes, she felt insecure around the girls herself. But, she knew it was a different level since she was in an actual relationship with Regina. "In my opinion, the best thing you can do is find someone who loves you for exactly what you are. Good mood, bad mood, ugly, pretty, handsome, what have you. I honestly feel like that is the love that you and Regina have. Maybe, you two just need to sit down, and maybe you can try to be vulnerable with her like you were with me." She offered softly.

She was right, too. (Y/n) and Regina did share a love that would overcome this. (Y/n) did love Regina despite all of her moods. She loved her in the morning when her hair was messy, she loved her in the afternoon when she was at lunch looking her most confident. "You're right," (Y/n) said softly, looking at her homework. "But first, I really do need help with my homework." They shared a small fit of laughter before Cady helped her finish her work.

After tutoring, she headed to Regina, wondering what she was going to say. Admittedly, (Y/n) felt a bit nervous. She wasn't the best at confrontation. That's why she sat in her car for ten minutes. Eventually, she pried herself from the driver's seat and made her way to Regina's front door. Before (Y/n) could knock or ring the doorbell, Regina opened the door with flushed cheeks. She stared at (Y/n) for a moment before running a manicured hand through her blonde hair. "I saw you sitting in your car for a while." She confessed, looking away a bit.

There was a moment of silence between the two of them, but there was no tension. It was just a thick heaviness of nervousness in the air. "I'm sorry," the two of them said in sync before laughing softly, a bit of awkwardness lifting off their shoulders. It was nice to see their anger over their last argument has finally worn off. (Y/n) always hated when Regina was angry, and Regina always tried to make sure (Y/n) was never angry. They worked together like that, always trying to protect each other's feelings while communicating and telling the truth. Sometimes, it led to little arguments, but the Shane Omen one was one of their bigger blow-ups.

Regina led her into the house, all the way to her room. "I want you to know that I cut off Shane. I realized that you had every right to feel uncomfortable. I'm sorry for invalidating your feelings the way that I did. I hope that you'll be able to forgive me." Regina said with a soft smile. (Y/n) only saw that smile when Regina was feeling vulnerable with her. Unlike (Y/n), Regina wasn't someone who wore her heart on her sleeve. So, when she apologizes, it means she took a lot of time out of her day to consider the things that have happened.

(Y/n) sighed, noticing that Regina's hand was taken into hers still. She laced their fingers together as she got the words sorted in her mind. "I'm sorry, too. I realized that I was just jealous and insecure. I trust you, and I should've made that clear. Instead, I let my fear control me." She explained, feeling tears brim in her eyes as she began to feel embarrassed again. She grew even more embarrassed when the tears began to fall down her cheeks.

Regina wiped the tears away softly, kissing (Y/n) gently on the lips. "(Y/n), I love you. No matter what I love you. I love so much it's crazy. You were valid to feel everything that you felt. The truth is, I should've cut him off a long time ago. None of this was fair to you." She said carefully, pulling away, but letting her hands stay to rub away any stray tear that continued to cascade down her girlfriend's cheeks.

There was a soft smile that pulled at the corners of (Y/n)'s lips as she sniffed. "I love you, too, Regina. No matter what." She said softly, moving in to kiss Regina once more.

[storiesbyjes2g]

3.112 Cutting ties

Love Day came upon us again, and it was so nice to have someone to celebrate with. Someone to celebrate, period. Sophia and I rarely did things traditionally, and I continued that trend by asking her out on a breakfast date. I suggested Vivianna's because it was the first place that came to mind, and I really liked their food. But Sophia was in goofball mode and said I wanted to see my girlfriend. I didn't like her saying that, but I loved seeing her in high spirits in those days, so I let it ride. When we got there, the host seated us at the same table from last time, and that sent her even more.

"It's a sign, Luca! If she's our server again, it's means you were meant to be."

I shook my head at her.

"You are way too high on life right now."

She gasped, still giggling at her silly joke.

"Luca! She's here! I think she's coming this way!"

I was still shaking my head when Yasmine walked up.

"Happy Love Day," she said drily. "Y'all don't have restaurants in Oasis Springs?"

"Of course we do," Sophia said before I had a chance to even think of a response. "But we love this one."

"Hmph. You must really love this food. I wouldn't unfriend someone and still show up at their job. Are you ready to order?"

Sophia looked at me in surprise but also trying to hide more giggles.

"Uhh...yeah, we're ready," I said, unsure if I should even respond to the first part.

When I finally looked at her, I saw her face matched her dry tone. Generally, she wasn't the cheeriest sim, but something was off. Granted, I was probably the last sim she wanted to see, but she should have been over that. Something else had to be going on, and I asked if she was okay.

"What do you care? I can't do this right now. I'll send someone else."

She hurried away into the kitchen, leaving us utterly confused.

"What in the world was that?" Sophia asked. "And you unfriended her?"

"Yeah! She's been sending me mean messages ever since-"

"You broke up?"

"Would you stop with that?? She wasn't my girlfriend!"

I couldn't understand why she found this situation so amusing. It annoyed me, but her laughter was so contagious. I couldn't help but laugh, too.

"Did she look different to you?" I asked.

"Sure did. I think she's pregnant."

"Pregnant? Yasmine? No way."

"She's definitely pregnant, babe."

"How do you know? She's not showing."

"Women know these things!"

"Hmph. Some sims don't need to be parents," I said under my breath. At least I thought I did.

"Luca!"

"What? It's true. She doesn't want kids right now. And she's mean...self-absorbed... Can you imagine her raising children?"

"I mean...I don't disagree, but... It's still not a nice thing to say. Maybe taking care of someone else will be good for her."

Nice or not, I meant every word. It was hard not to get upset about it. Sims all around us kept popping up pregnant unexpectedly while Sophia and I woohoo'd each other's brains out to no avail. WE want a baby! Why won't it happen for us? It wasn't fair. But I didn't want to ruin our date with my petty, jealous thoughts. That rant would have to remain in my head.

"Anyway... You excited about moving tomorrow?"

"You know it! I can hardly believe it."

"Yeah, seriously. I've been thinking about that house for so long... I have to keep reminding myself this is real life."

My Social Bunny chime went off, so I checked to see who sent me a message.

"Oh...it's Maira."

"Why do you say it like that?"

"Like what?"

"Like you're surprised your friend is messaging you."

"I'm not surprised. It's just...I don't know. Every time I hear from her, I feel bad."

"How come?"

"Because I'm such a bad friend to her."

Sophia's lip quivered.

"I highly doubt that."

"It's true though! I never call her. She's always the one reaching out. Even back in the day it was like that. When I was open to dating her-well, she says we did date, but whatever. I got mixed signals, so I kinda stopped putting energy into our friendship. Then I met Yasmine-"

"While you were talking to me," she said sarcastically.

Like a light switch flicking on, I understood why she continued to joke about me and Yasmine. She still felt some kind of way about realizing she wasn't the only one I was talking to, and this was her brand of petty behavior. I shook my head because I knew she would never let that go, and the jokes were a permanent part of our marriage.

"Yes, I was talking to you. I met Yasmine and Chi Chi-"

"I thought you didn't date her."

"I didn't. She came to my classes a lot and invited me to her house a few times."

She eyed me suspiciously, but I continued my story.

"Dating, having female friends, and all of that was new to me. I didn't know how to say no to her. I couldn't say no to her; you know how she is. And I was talking to you on top of dealing with my own issues... It was a crazy time, and I didn't know how to handle it all, so I ended up neglecting Maira. I feel bad because it wasn't like that in the beginning."

"You didn't have any distractions then."

"Yeah...that's true."

"Do you think it's time to let her go? Everyone's not meant to be in your life forever."

"I know. That might be part of the issue. I want to be a good friend while being respectful to you, but I honestly don't know how she fits into my life anymore. But severing the relationship? I don't think I want to do that. At least not yet."

"Okay." She turned back to her food and took a few bites before a very obvious idea let up her face. "Since we're moving now, we should do a combo celebration! We can turn my birthday party into a housewarming party! Invite her to that."

"Oooh good thinking! You know I married you for your brains."

"Ah ha! The truth comes out."

[cleverthylacine]

Okay. Wow. (also feel free to circulate this post to people even if they don't like me)

I didn't want to make a post like this but things have gone too far. I am still not mentioning names. If you know you know, if you don't know, ignore this post and be happy that you don't know.

Yesterday I went on a blitz of blocking people I was told had been sharing my private DMs and talking shit about me behind my back with an artist who is freaked out that I told them I wouldn't take down a reblog, and then explained that they are popular with RavWave shippers, and that I didn't know who they were until other shippers sent me their stuff, because their art does look shippy to us.

It seems that a lot of the people who are really mad about this (and you're welcome to share this one post of mine with those people, though I do not appreciate that their friends have been stalking my blog in general) think that I was trying to ARGUE with that person.

Much as their motivation in drawing the art was not to depict my OTP, my motivation in telling them that they accidentally did was not to argue with them about how they should view the relationship. It was information about why people get what is apparently the wrong idea about their art.

If I were writing or drawing something that was being misinterpreted all over creation, I would want to know why.

Then I would be armed with the knowledge to decide whether or not I wanted to do things differently in the future.

"I don't care what those people think" is a valid decision. So is "hmm, maybe she has a point." Whichever decision I made, I'd want to make it as an informed decision.

I feel a little sorry about this giant misunderstanding, but I'm absolutely disinclined to apologise because:

Their first message to me was insulting. Many people believe that it was a "polite request". But polite words can be used in a thoroughly rude and nasty way. There is no nice way to tell someone that you think they're so nasty you don't want your public posts appearing on their blog.

Saying no to requests is a thing that people are allowed to do.

Their second message to me, which evaded my block because it was sent to another account, was blatantly offensive and went into the quality of my family and relationships. I didn't respond to that because I'd have gone off.

They have their friends stalking my blog and have admitted to doing so, and have responded to venting on my part by vagueblogging in my own blogs by telling everyone that they're the person I am annoyed with and here are the receipts. Seriously, wtf?

I only know this because I'm trying to block all the assholes who are reposting my personal conversations with them, a thing i only know because a friend of mine told me so after receiving a demand they unfriend me.

This person and their friends are sending anon asks to my friends, or in one case, publicly demanding in an RP community, that people who want to interact with them unfollow me, because they will not interact with anyone who interacts with me. Go the fuck back to high school, Regina.

Don't put icing and sprinkles on a pile of shit and tell yourself you gave someone a chocolate cake. This person has never been "nice" to me.

Under the cut: why IDW Ravage would never allow herself to be handled like a pet cat, and why RavWave shippers feel the same way about the Earthspark deleted scenes, even though we know that's probably not what the showrunners meant us to think.

I have come to the conclusion that's it's just another case of antis thinking that if you can see two people in a non-platonic relationship that they think of as family, you're just nasty. Especially if the feline shaped character is being handled like a pet cat.

But the person who said "I look disrespectfully on anyone who ships this, that's just a goof and his cat" has missed the entire point of these characters' relationship. Soundwave would never treat or handle Ravage like she was a pet cat.

Anyone else who says RavWave shippers are nasty because "it's NoRMaL to handle your cat that way" is fundamentally not getting who Ravage is and how she feels about being touched.

Ravage is a sapient adult mech with a full range of sapient adult feelings, and touching her like she's an animal is a microaggression or a macroaggression, depending upon where and how you touch her. The oppression of beastformers is a big fucking thing in IDW 2005. Other beastformers also complain about constantly having to deal with unwanted and disrespectful touching. (Fortress Maximus is a known offender.)

IDW Ravage is sleeping in Megatron's bed throughout MTMTE (when she's under it, she's guarding him). She only allows him to touch her neck in front of others...because behaving like a pet cat increases the chances that people will treat her like one.

(She almost cut Nautica several times. That's another character I ship her with, because what would be funnier than her realising that this actually is a whole ass person and if she can't stop touching her, she might actually be attracted to her?)

(Note: Canonically, Ravage in IDW uses he/him, and I do know that. However, about half the fandom writes Ravage as female. I'm in that half.)

BTW, I feel exactly the same way about the Earthspark deleted scenes. Every RavWave shipper on the planet does. We've talked about it. We realise that the artists and showrunners probably intended it to be innocent on the grounds that she is a cat. But we are also people who like to write her as an adult Decepticon officer with agency and self-respect who wouldn't behave like that in front of other people unless they knew he has privileges they don't.

I am aware that half the fandom draws Ravage art that's basically cat memes. (I hate that so much. But as a proshipper, I recognise people have the right to depict characters any way they want. That doesn't mean I haven't had to vent to people like @bitegore and @miner16 to keep myself from saying something.)

Also, I strongly suggest that people who get this worked up about misinterpretations of their art or writing do not become professional creators. As a member of fandom since the 1970s, I'm kind of super extremely aware that most of what fandom does is counter to what the creator intended, and frequently that's the point.

I'm also kind of super extremely aware that if you don't have loads of people reinterpreting and remixing your work and your characters, that actually means nobody cares about your work enough to have blorbo feels about your characters.

(The side poll, which came from another blog and mentioned no names, was an irritated attempt to find out whether people really do think it's normal to cuddle your mom that way, because the second message insinuated that my mother and I must have a terrible relationship because we don't touch each other like that. I kinda wanted to know what people who were not predisposed to take my side and did not know what was going on would think of that idea, because I really do not think most people touch their mothers like that; their mothers aren't nonsapient animals and would thus consider it weird and inappropriate.)

[servin-up-surveys]

survey #247

What colour are your father’s eyes? Brown.

Who is the first contact in your phone? What colour is his/her hair? My older sister, brown.

Which one of your relatives is most likely to embarrass you? My dad.

Is there a song you can listen to over and over and never get fed up? I'll get tired of any song *eventually*. I'm someone who binges songs 100+ times (that is not an exaggeration) when I get into it, but eventually I'll need a break from it.

Do you have a friend whose name begins with "H"? Describe him/her. Not off the top of my head.

So, how are you? Is there anything wrong? I mean, things have been "wrong" for a very long time now, but I'm making it. I'm currently sick with some cold; my mom just got over bronchitis, and my sister also has a bad cough, but I'm nowhere near as bad as my mom was. I mainly just have a mucus-y cough, plus a runny nose.

Who is the most intelligent person you know? Probably my boyfriend, honestly.

Who was the last female you were introduced to? What was your first impression of her? Uh I'm not sure. I don't often meet new people.

Who was the last male you were introduced to? What was your first impression of him? I also don't really know.

Do you have a close friend of the opposite sex? Besides my boyfriend, no.

When was the last time you made a sandwich? What did you put on it? I think the last time I made a sandwich was actually for my mom, a peanut butter one. Her sugar dropped, and sometimes she'll ask me to make one because the peanut butter helps.

What were you like as a 12-year-old? Insufferable, lol. I was very creative and energetic (especially internally), and goofy. I was such a cringefest lol, online especially. I cared a lot about my friends and had big dreams.

When you woke up this morning, what kind of mood were you in? I'm generally bummed when I wake up, as depressing as that sounds. It's just another day to get through, and I'm never ready for it.

In the past week, how many times have you cried? I don't think I've cried at all in the past week.

On a scale of 1 to 10 (10 being amazing), how good is life atm? Three.

A lot of my friends are unfollowing or unfriending those who agree with a different political party than them. Have you ever unfollowed or unfriended anyone over politics? Why or why not? Brother, I will cut ties with someone EASILY for not agreeing on human rights. It's not just "politics," it's about who you believe has rights or not. I cut out quite a few people this election. You're not getting your "cheaper groceries," btw. (:

Do you trust in God? Why or why not? lol growing up with "God" turned me into a massive atheist

Has anyone in your family been diabetic? Diabetes runs strong in my family. I've been in pre-diabetes territory multiple times, very grateful to not be there now though.

Do you know anyone who has the medical condition POTS? My older sister did/does, idk if you can "get over" POTS so unsure how to phrase this. She just doesn't really deal with symptoms anymore, but she was confidently diagnosed with it as a teenager. I know Sara also did.

Have you been ignoring someone who has been trying to reach out to you? If so, why? No.

If you celebrate Thanksgiving, have you ever been the one to cook the turkey? No, and I'd be happy never to. I don't even like turkey like that.

Do you pray every day? Why or why not? How about doing things more active than prayer to change circumstances??????

When was the last time you went to Starbucks? I don't believe *I've* been to a Starbucks since I was getting TMS therapy out of town. It was right beside the clinic, and Mom would go there to get a coffee and me, a snack.

Do you prefer ebooks or actual books? I STRONGLY prefer physical books. I'm ALWAYS on technology, let books be an escape from it, please.

Do you post on Instagram frequently? No.

How many Instagram accounts do you have? Three, all for different purposes.

Do you like to cuddle with your S.O. or do you prefer your space? I only like to cuddle if I'm not hot. If I'm hot, oh my god don't touch me.

What TV shows do you watch on a regular basis? Literally none.

What is the last thing you scribbled down on a Post-It note? I have no idea.

Do you care if your produce is organic or not? No.

Are you happy with the size of your bedroom? It's fine for me, especially because I only sleep in there.

Where was the last place you went that was totally new to you, as in, it was the first time you’d been there? Uh... I think it was a sushi restaurant back in August for my mom's birthday. I refuse to try sushi (I can bet with all my being I'd despise it) and the thing I actually ordered was inedibly bad to me, so I just ate when we got home lol.

When was the last time you used someone else’s computer? Like, two months ago when I used Girt's computer for storing stuff in WoW before it expired in my mailbox lol.

What’s the relationship status of the last person you talked to? Dating me.

Have you ever been a passenger in a semi-trailer truck? No.

Have you seen any extended relatives in the last month? Yes actually, I saw my cousin Audrey.

Do you take part in paying the bills for your household? No, but only - only - because I have no source of income whatsoever. If I did, I'd be helping Mom with bills whether she liked it or not, I'm grown.

Do you know anyone with celiac disease? Yes, multiple.

How do you usually celebrate New Years? I might have a drink, but that's basically it. Sometimes not even that.

Do you have a first aid kit at home? Yes.

Would you ever get a matching tattoo with someone? Only with my mom. I've gotten a matching tattoo before and it's since been covered because go figure, me and the other person involved no longer associate. That's how matching tats tend to go.

What form of communication did you last use to talk to the person you're currently interested in? Discord.

Do you want to see someone right now? I do, but not while I'm sick.

Did the last guy/girl you kissed have any piercings? No.

Do you spend more time outside or inside? Inside, it's not even a competition.

Would you rather give up the computer or the TV? TV, easy. I'd have an INCREDIBLY hard time adapting to no computer.

Last person to make you seriously mad? The country in general, lol.

When people ask "how are you?" do you say "good" even if you aren't? No. I've never understood this. Don't ask if you don't want an honest answer. Like sure, I'm not gonna randomly go into detail on why I'm not doing good, but I'm not going to lie to you about how I'm doing.

Did you speak to your father today? No.

Some people were really destructive as a child, were you? No.

Who was the last person you were in a car with? Mom.

Who was the last person you cried in front of? My mom.

Would you prefer eating jello or pudding? Pudding, if it's chocolate.

Have you ever been described as “adorable”? Yes, this has been largely a boyfriend thing though, at least that I remember.

Are you a moody person? Yes.

What video game could you waste the most time on? World of Warcraft.

Did your grandparents teach you anything? My grandma taught me the kind of person NOT to be.

Do you want/have a Bachelor’s degree? I used to, but it's just not obtainable for me, at least with how my life is right now.

Are you into superheroes? Who’s your favourite? Nah.

Have you ever felt like you were making a mistake when dating someone? Yup.

Have you ever played Cards Against Humanity? Did you like it? Yeah, I enjoyed myself.

Have you ever flown somewhere alone? Yes, twice to see Sara.

When is garbage day in your area? Friday.

Do you know anyone who hates/dislikes chocolate? My grandma didn't unless it was with peanut butter, and my nephew isn't a chocolate guy either.

Do you have more girl friends or guy friends? My three closest friends are non-binary, then I have one decent friend that is a woman.

Have you ever hated yourself? I still do lol. I'm trying to get better, but it's hard.

Did your parents ever ground you? Yes.

Were you/are you popular in high school? No.

Are your nails currently long? No, I can't let my nails get long. I'll end up tearing them.

Are you more of a mommy’s person or a daddy’s person? Mama's girl. I had awful separation anxiety from my mom when I was young.

Have you ever made a sex tape? No, this isn't something I'd be willing to do.

Do you look like a boring person? I mean, I don't think I LOOK boring. I have pastel hair, tattoos, a lip piercing. But I AM very boring, haha.

Have you ever seriously questioned your sanity? I very genuinely have, and at a point I don't think I WAS sane.

Do you need a vacation? A vacation sounds great...

How do you feel about your weight right now? I despise my weight. It's caused a lot of health problems, and even more self-image issues.

Would you ever snort pixie sticks? I'm not snorting anything.

Oreos or Chips Ahoy? Hm, depends on what I'm up for.

What’s the next thing you have to do that you’re dreading? I have an allergy test coming up and I won't be able to take my inhaler(s) for I think 24 hours prior, and that frightens me. I don't think 24 hours will be a big deal, but I'm still worried.

Have you ever drank cough syrup to get high? No.

Do you miss any of your exes? I miss one, but not romantically. It'd be nice to be friends, but... I know we couldn't be. Even if he WAS fine with friendship, I know it wouldn't work. I can't be connected to him again, things are better off this way.

Have your parents ever suggested that you see a therapist? I have regularly seen a therapist since I was in the 6th grade, and I'm getting close to 29 now. I don't remember if starting was my idea or Mom's.

Do you masturbate on a regular basis? I don't. I won't get into why it's not for me, no one needs to know lol, but it's just not. I'm not AGAINST it, I couldn't care less if other people do it, I just don't.

Has anyone ever threatened you? Yes.

Who’s the last person to post on your Facebook wall? Do you like this person? Probably my mom. I adore my mother, she means everything to me.

Have you ever considered being a cop? No.

Would you ever consider working for the government? Nope.

What subjects do you refuse to talk about? Why are you hiding from them? I mean... I don't really "refuse" to talk about anything. I suppose this kinda does depend on the person though, some things I don't wanna talk about with them.

When you are exposed to the artwork (poetry, painting etc) of a friend, family member, or acquaintance, how likely are you to criticize it? This depends. Do they WANT critique? How well do I know them?

Are you arrogant? About what? I can't relate to arrogance at all tbh.

Name the ten bands you are the biggest fan of: Ozzy Osbourne, Rammstein, Marilyn Manson (yes I know he's an absolute garbage human being, his music is my problematic interest), Motionless In White, Korn, Otep (I just learned the other day they're quitting and I'm heartbroken), In This Moment, Metallica, Powerwolf, 3TEETH.

How many MySpace accounts do you have? I had one that I'm assuming still floats around in the history of the Internet.

When were you the saddest in your life? The end of 2015-start of 2017. I genuinely wanted to be dead every day, until I literally did try to die.

Do you own more than one cell phone? I think I still have an old one stored somewhere, but I certainly don't use it. I'm really not sure if I even have it anymore.

Have you ever sang in public? Yes.

Next concert? Who the hell knows. I've only ever been to one in my entire life.

What did you have for dinner tonight? Leftover Domino's pizza.

Have you ever shaved off your eyebrow before? No, but I've absentmindedly almost entirely plucked one when I was in high school. That was embarrassing.

Do you want to have a boy or girl whenever you have kids? I'm not having kids, but if I planned on having one, I'd want a girl.

What is a movie you're waiting to see? I want to see the Mufasa movie when it comes out next month.

What are you most scared of? Living alone of the streets. I've been obsessed with that fear lately; it gets worse and worse the older my mom gets because I'm convinced that's my fate once she's dead.

Do you talk to any of your ex-boyfriend/girlfriend? No.

What is your mom doing right now? She's in the living room watching TV.

What is the weather like right now? My computer says 49*F, mostly clear.

What was the last video game you played? Girt and I are VERY slowly making our way through the remake of Silent Hill 2. We only play it at his place (he has the required console), and we haven't hung out much. He's been struggling with stuff and he isolates when he's stressed, and now I'm sick, so...

Do you know where your best friend is? He'll be on his way home from work now.

Who was the last person to comment you on Facebook? My friend Sammy.

What is your display picture of on Facebook? Me, not too long after I dyed my hair purple.

What is one food you will not eat? Brother, I won't eat MOST food. Beans, to name just one to answer the question.

Do you eat anything now that you never used to eat? As a kid, I hated ketchup.

Have you ever kissed the same sex? Yes.

When was the last time you had a period? I haven't had a period since April this year. I think my old shitty psychiatrist taking me off basically all my psych meds at once without weaning royally fucked up my system, and I don't like it. I like the regularity of having a period, I worry too much about being pregnant even when I know I'm not.

[neonbutchery]

You not seeing mystra as evil despite grooming someone just BC her victim is a man is uh a red flag ngl

okay i'm going to turn off anons for a while so this will be the last thing i'll say about this. if you do want to have a discussion about this, i'm open to having it as long as it's earnest (which judging from the tone of your message, isn't the case).

number one, the post about the evil bg3 character hairstyle was meant to be a joke. i know that saying "bro this is just a joke" is a crappy defence sometimes, but i never aimed for serious character analysis in a joke image i made in 20 minutes that came from me noticing a funny pattern.

number two: i haven't done the gale romance nor played through the gale origin. all i know about gale's story is what i've experienced through a tav that didn't romance him, so it's very likely i missed some of the content related to his story. that being said, i've seen both "mystra is evil" and "mystra isn't evil" thinkpieces, so i honestly didn't want to get into this discourse since i have zero to none knowledge about gale's wider backstory and mystra's wider dnd lore. if i had included mystra as a villain i would've probably gotten people contesting that, too, so i decided to just put her in a category that wasn't "100% maliciously evil villain". she absolutely did harm to gale, and i'm not denying that. i'm just not comfortable making a clear judgment on if she's irredeemably evil or not.

you want to go back to that image? fine. i included cazador and mizora, both of whom have male victims (astarion + all of the other male spawn, and wyll). mizora's abhorrent treatment of wyll is especially dismissed by the fandom as something that's not that serious anyways, too. are also you going to jump into the inboxes of every single person who's ever made "step on me mommy mizora" jokes and accuse them of also not caring about male victims?

finally, number three: i really don't appreciate the implication being that i condone abuse/grooming if it's directed towards men just because of a shitpost i made. i'm sorry, but you don't know nothing about me nor my personal life nor my relationships, and i don't think that making wider judgments on internet strangers based on a single meme about fictional characters from a fictional world is something that you should be doing. i can't tell you how to think, and if you're weirded out by my take (which, i reiterate, isn't even a serious character analysis) that's completely fine! feel free to mute me or block me or unfollow/unfriend me if you're one of my mutuals. i won't even hold it against you, since i know that everyone's triggers and squicks are different. but what i don't appreciate is you coming into my blog and accusing me of being a grooming apologist based on only one tumblr post that wasn't even about mystra's relationship with gale on the first place.

again: if you want to actually have a serious discussion about this, you can go off-anon and dm me. if you want to accuse me of something as heavy as being an actual abuse apologist, say it with your whole chest. have a nice night, afternoon, or morning, wherever you are.

[not-poignant]

Ooh, cool! Thank you so much for the long reply! A lot of this was genuinely completely new to me -- I'd never known there were ongoing discussions that early, but of course it makes complete sense there were, both on LJ and predating it. I think it also goes to show how well we could self-segregate on LJ, I think moreso than we can now.

I think, in retrospect, that a lot of my experiences with 2000s fandom can be summed up with, 'I was a teenager' and thus wanted to be 'cool'. There was a lot of 'not like other girls'-ism going on in those sporking and Mary Sue comms, and I always just assumed we were all teenagers -- it certainly felt that way. The few people I've kept in touch with from those days have largely grown out of it, though it doesn't surprise to hear there were (and probably still are) grown adults who shit on others' fanfics.

(As an addendum, I could add that slashfic and that sort of 'canon non-compliance' was completely okay in the fandom spaces I ran in back then, but people would get very upset about extremely arbitrary things-- 'transfer students' in HP, changing characters' ages, making up a minor oc side character for plot purposes because all ocs were apparently bad (and especially if female), etc. It was strange which hairs people decided to split.)

Anyway! Thank you VERY much for such a long and in-depth reply! It's cool to see how these things have changed and developed, and I'm glad to see my experience wasn't emblematic of fandom as a whole.

Thanks for such a thought-provoking question! It really got me thinking about how Livejournal was really excellent at creating different sort of pockets of experiences, and in a while is really reflective as proto-social media of like, the big echo chambers we have happening now all across social media! That's really interesting to think about.

For me, it's funny, most of the fandom folks I knew were all older than me, many were in their 40s and 50s while I was in my 20s. Very few teens comparatively were attracted to certain fandoms like The X-Files and NCIS some of the other spaces I was in, so while there were definitely teens, it was like... a different feeling. Like, even these days I find it fascinating how there are 'younger' fandoms (in terms of how many younger folk are in it) and 'older' fandoms.

And yeah you're so right about people getting upset about arbitrary things! And also that um, 'not like other girls' which now itself is kind of mocked by fandom, so things really did come full circle on that front where now it's not cool to be one of the people who says that x.x

Honestly it's hard to be a teenager on the internet! All the things that play out like... all the dynamics, a lot just play out online instead, and they still exist. A person still wants to be cool and accepted and liked (and that's not age specific, like, most of us want a degree of at least some of these lol), and cliques can form very quickly. I remember how bad it felt back then even in my 20s when I got unfriended by a mutual who I thought was a really good friend, that stuff was devastating!

"making up a minor oc side character for plot purposes because all ocs were apparently bad"

Ahaha this is one of the reasons I still sometimes have like apologetic tones in some of my comments about the amount of OCs I add, because yeah that was really disapproved of! I remember that and I still have like... shades of that at times. I'm mostly over it now, but oof I remember the first time I did it and I was like 'is this okay *chews on fingernails* I bet people will hate this because of it.' (And then that turned into Fae Tales so).

The Mary Sue stuff was really aggressively unpacked, like in very popular kind of fandom-friendly journalism spaces at the time, I mean that's how we ended up with the journalism site 'The Mary Sue' in the first place. People really took a stand on that one. In a way, we were all kind of looking at our own attitudes, like, *why* is it bad to do this, or *what* does it mean that a girl feels like they can't be like other girls - is that internalised misogyny (and sometimes it was), and I miss that kind of meta discussion because I do feel it happens a little less now.

There was a time when I didn't like Mary Sues, no one did, though I think that was before I found my first meta community where it was like 'oh people are talking about EVERYTHING I thought was like universally accepted in fandom.' Though we never got that far on how racist fandom could be, which is still an issue, but one that does get talked about (it would just be nice if AO3 talked about it too).

I sadly think a lot of people in their 40s and 50s can act a lot like teenagers in fandom spaces sometimes, some of the antis in like teenage spaces today are like 40s kind of 'guiding them along' this path of moral puritanical righteousness and almost role-modelling how to bully others. And some of the folks running public Sporking blogs were like... older folks who fostered connections to younger folk.

LJ was wild tbh :D

Anyway, it's so interesting to think of all the different pockets we ended up in. I'm sure there's like countless more that we both have no experience of, where someone else would be like 'oh I was in LJ fandom what's a Mary Sue?' and that would be entirely legitimate too. Sometimes it's easy (I fall into this trap) to think of historical fandom as being one thing instead of like a thousand things. So yeah, this was cool! Thank you :D

[heeheesang]

𝔂𝓪𝓷𝓰 𝓳𝓾𝓷𝓰𝔀𝓸𝓷—𝓻𝓾𝓶𝓸𝓾𝓻𝓼 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓻𝓸𝓪𝓼𝓽𝓼

𝔂𝓪𝓷𝓰 𝓳𝓾𝓷𝓰𝔀𝓸𝓷—𝓸𝓭𝓭 𝓸𝓷𝓮 𝓸𝓾𝓽

sypnosis : girl named kim yn, debuts under hybe with a ton of attention, making her stand out from the rest. she thought it was fine at first, until she was caught off guard and caught in a scandal with one of the groups in hybe labels.

warnings! cursing & innapropriate jokes (at certain chapters)

"yn! please come out! we're gonna help you, please!" i heard ni-ki screaming along with heavy footsteps running back and forth.

i let out silent sobs, too wrecked to even come out of where i had been hiding. i heard them yelling my name, heck i even heard the manager yelling for me. i took in a deep breath only to let out a loud sob, catching myself off guard and the people around me.

"yn unnie.." minju said as she hugged me tightly and rubbed my back as i cried on her shoulder.

"you found her, yn..." the girls soon gathered around and hugged me as they called out the rest who were also finding for me.

they led me to the dance studio before we all hugged and they comforted me, telling me that this was a phase that i should just ignore. but how could i ignore it when there were literally fans who were making fun of me, using my old pictures and drawing pictures on them.

"ynnie, look at me." haerin said as she cupped my face and let out a big smile, "yn, this is going to go away very soon. they're just jealous of all your achievements and what they could not do, you did. they don't see what we see in you, you have a ton of potential yn."

"i agree, you're all perfect one by one. yn, they're just attacking you even more because of your leadership. just like i had it, they hated me and kept saying mean things to me until they were tired because i didn't even pay attention to them." jungwon agreed to haerin's sentence and opened his arms.

i hugged him abd we wobbled from side to side as he calms me down, i was for sure going to get made fun of my ni-ki and eunchae later on for having this moment. jungwon gave really warm hugs, he really did.

after a while, i moved on from the situation, or i forced myself to, so we could have our party started before everyone left. there were tons of people, ni-ki, jungwon and sunoo from enhypen, eunchae and kazhua from le sserafim, haerin and hanni from newjeans and my own group.

we ordered food delivery that came in ten minutes and we ate it all up while getting to know one another. we played mafia in a circle and the circle went like this, me, jungwon, haerin, minju, ni-ki, haruka, isabella, eunchae, hanni, kazuha, sunoo, hanni, doyeon and back to me. doyeon was the invigilator of the game.

the mafias were unknown, i was the doctor, and the two policemen were unknown. we started off the game well until one by one, everyone around me started dieing.

"yn's mafia! i'm telling you!" ni-ki yelled out loud dramatically and i threw my plushie at him, "it's not me!"

"then what are you, ynnie?!" eunchae asked as they all laughed at how i was super defensive.

"i have a role but i'm not the mafia!"

"so what's your role then?!"

"if i say it i'm going to die..!"

"she's definitely the mafia!"

"no no, she's a civilian! i can vouch for her!" jungwon yelled amongst the crowd and they all 'oo'-ed.

"backing up for you girlfriend huh?" haerin teased as i got up my seat just to hit her shoulder.

"no no seriously! i checked her role!"

"what if they're both mafias?"

"we're not oh my god?!?!?"

"it's—"

"NISHIMURA RIKI SAY ONE WORD AND I'M UNFRIENDING YOU EVERYWHERE." i protected my role as well as jungwon's and ni-ki cried out laughing with the others.

but in the end, jungwon and i were voted out together. jungwon and i gasped at who the mafias were, unsurprisingly, it's ni-ki of course, with eunchae. wow.

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yjw masterlist

taglist : open!

@clairecottenheart

[ryanlawlessuntapped]

The Unfriending Project

Let me ask you a question before we start: Do you hate social media or do you hate your friends?

Or, more specifically, what your friends post? 

Because that's what I find to be the issue I have with social media. Seeing a side of my friends that I don't like, plain and simple.

If I go on social media and feel bad, how much of that is caused by what is being shown to me, and how much of it is because of what my friends are posting? 

The platforms can really only show me what I choose to follow, right? Be it businesses, sites, pages, groups, and friends. Hating how I feel after going on a platform says less about the platform itself and more about the quality of the posts I'm seeing.

It's a little like how people who are stuck in a traffic jam will always complain about the other drivers, not recognizing that at the moment they're making that complaint, they're not "in" traffic—they are traffic. They're essentially complaining about themselves. 

If I'm on social media complaining about social media, I'm really complaining about myself; specifically, what I choose to follow or engage with while I'm on it. 

Or, more to the point, I'm not "on" social media—I am social media, and that makes me part of the problem. 

And, yes, social media has numerous issues, especially Facebook, most of which are related to privacy and security breaches and exploitative practices on the part of the companies. 

That's all there, but come on, that's not what's affecting your mental health and wellness after you scroll your way through your feed. 

It's all the assholes you're friends with or following. 

You don't stay up late at night fuming over Mark Zuckerberg's reptilian conquest of humanity through the Book of Faces. 

You stay up late at night because your idiot friend just posted about something he knows nothing about but, thanks to a YouTube video, now considers himself informed enough about the topic to disagree with the foremost experts in the world.

That right there? That's why you hate social media. 

I know that's why I hate it.

I realize that my relationship with social media is a little more complex than the simple binary of love versus hate, and yours probably is, too. 

My first mistake is seeing social media as communication platforms that are meant to enrich the human experience. 

They're not. Not at all.

It's not one-to-one or even one-to-many communication, as we usually understand these concepts.

It's directionless cultural homogeneity that is flattening the human experience by removing mechanisms of cooperation or even collaboration in the pursuit of freedom of expression. 

That's the first thing I had to come to grips with as I considered why social media made me feel bad about myself, the world around me, and life in general. 

The second thing has less to do with the failings of social media for deep communication purposes and more to do with the connection it purports to provide.

A disclaimer of sorts: 

A lot of what I'm going to talk about is based on my experiences with Facebook, but not exclusively so. 

It's just that Facebook is where I clarified much of the vision I had for what I'm going to say in this essay, or more precisely, how I came to the conclusions I did through my experiences on that specific site. 

Other social media platforms are not exempt from my overall critique just because they're not being named directly. 

It's just that Facebook is more recognizable to more people based on user volume alone, and it's the one that's inclined to see people connect in a way that most closely resembles how friendships develop IRL through shared interests or familiar connections. 

That gives it a little more promise than many of its competitors. It's the one thing Facebook does better than most. 

Still, it's a hollow process compared to the analog version of meeting someone in a place through joint interests or doing an activity that appeals to both parties and leads to bonding. 

It's just that, as superficial friendship-forming processes go, it's better than many of the alternative connection-building platforms out there.

X, nee Twitter, is guilt by association in that two people are probably equally prejudiced against the same out-group, Instagram doesn't know what it is anymore, and users are united by their confusion, TikTok is spyware posing as a fun distraction that brings people together to get hacked, and LinkedIn is a spam farm where everyone is helping someone make something with nothing to show for anything. 

See what I mean? Every platform has its issues. Facebook is just the easiest one to explore these issues with because of its ubiquity and scope. It's everywhere and does everything. 

So, if I say Facebook, I'm using it as a catchall term for social media in general, in all its dumpster-fire glory. The problems endemic to one are often endemic to all. It's a matter of severity at this point. 

The singularity is that they're all bad for us in a general sense if not strictly managed.

I just wanted to clarify that before getting into the main topic of negative social media experiences; more to the point, negative social media experiences brought about by the people we call our friends on social media. 

That's the key point to all of this. 

Our so-called friends. 

I went through a phase where I would accept every friend request that came my way. I often did this because the friend requests I would get came from "mutual friends," as it's called, or, on occasion, from members of Facebook groups that I was also a member of because of common interests. 

I've always tried to screen requests by asking these mutual friends about the person in question, but I was relatively easygoing about whom I'd say yes to. 

What I learned in time is that my social media experience reflects my social media connections.  The less I enjoy the platforms I'm on, the more likely it is that I'm connected to people I shouldn't be. I should have scrutinized these connections before just haphazardly accepting them. 

That's really not the platform's fault. 

That was the driver for me as far as enjoying social media less and less as friends or connections accumulated, and I found myself confronting the thoughts and feelings of people whom I didn't much like upon further exposure.

I often accepted friend requests or connections from people I would, it turns out, avoid in real life based on the rhetoric they were espousing in their daily posts, even if they were friends of friends. 

Within one or two posts from these folks, I'd know unequivocally that I didn't really think all that highly of them. Accepting their request to connect was a mistake, and I'm the one who made it. 

Not Facebook and not Mark Zuckerberg. 

Worse than that, though? I'd stay friends with these people even after I realized that I didn't really like them, or at least how they represented themselves online. 

All because it felt better to keep them than get rid of them, even though I couldn't really articulate why. 

Maybe it was the friend count, or maybe it was the social-validation feedback loop. Either way, I let the whole experience ride when I really should have been more discerning. 

It was as if my success in life depended on my ability to stay connected to all of these people. It's a trap that way, but one that is actually a choice we make. Or, more often than not, don't make.

Why do we remove that choice just because of the medium? 

It seems like we stay connected to people we really don't like all that much based on the posts they make or the comments they share more often than we excise these same people from our feeds for the same things when the evidence is overwhelmingly in favor of doing so. 

You know you really don't like this person, but you belong to the same martial arts club or play the same sport or share a career path, so you remain friends with them. Yet, outside of those narrow domains, there is nothing to really bind you together. 

Maybe these people are really not worth knowing. Maybe they're actually assholes who use social media to say and share things they would never talk about or do in an analog setting. It's a bait and switch. 

That's ruining the whole social media experience because it keeps us connecting to people we don't want to be associated with at all. That's brutal. 

Part of it is because Facebook really doesn't want you to unfriend anyone. None of the social media platforms do. Think about it. 

Facebook, specifically, offers all sorts of alternatives like unfollowing them but remaining friends, so-called "snoozing" them so you can take a break from their assholery or hiding the post that you don't like with a quick click of a button. 

That right there should give you pause. 

It did for me. 

When Facebook or any social site tries to slow you down when trying to assert your preferences about the connections you have, there's something corrupt and unseemly about the whole process.

When I realized that these platforms wanted me to stay connected to people I didn't like, I started disconnecting from people with little to no warning. 

When Facebook started showing me people I had previously unfriended in friend suggestions, I started blocking those same people so that Facebook couldn't do that anymore. 

It shouldn't be that difficult. It is, though, because there's more money to be made in keeping everyone connected. 

It makes the advertising easier and the marketing more manipulative, both of which allow for greater profits. 

I've been asked why I bother to unfriend or block people by others, especially mutual friends who might find themselves in the awkward position of being asked why Ryan unfriended so and so. 

I don't always have a satisfying answer for them. 

I have an honest one, though: I don't like assholes.

Sure, if they're bullying or trolling, they deserve to get unfriended or blocked—that totally makes sense to most people. 

But what's the point of unfriending or blocking people who aren't necessarily being bullies or trolls, just assholes hiding behind a keyboard and spouting off idiocy. 

What if they're just annoying? 

To me, that's enough. It should be enough for you too.

I mean, what's the threshold if it's not that? Do we have to wait for them to post a manifesto and threaten people before we decide that, hey, maybe it's time to move on from this person? 

I ain't waiting that long. This person is making my social media experience negative enough without letting it get to that point. 

Does that make all of social media negative? 

No, it doesn't. It means that I need to take some control of what I let into my life on social media or anywhere else.

I think it comes down to something I have been telling people for years. The friends in your life are not there to make you happy. That's not their responsibility nor is it a good practice to always be seeking happiness from external sources that are notoriously unreliable. 

That's not what I'm saying here when I stipulate my "no asshole" approach to curating my friends list.

I measure the quality of my relationships based on whether they make me unhappy or not. I'll take care of my happiness, just don't ruin it for me and we can remain friends. Make sense?

But if I go on social media and see that a friend is posting about things that are just dumb and that's making me unhappy? I just unfriend them now. 

I don't mind disparate or diverging opinions. Those are important to a well-rounded worldview. I don't even mind being friends with assholes under the right circumstances given that we're talking about ethically-centered assholes. 

I get that everyone has their beliefs and values, and we're better for the diversity. To a point. 

And a fair question to ask is who am I to make these judgments about any of it? 

How am I in any better a position to decide who's an asshole and who isn't and what's to be done about it?

The answer is complex and comes in two parts: a "me" part and a "you" part.

I'm the end-user that the social media platforms want to advertise to—I'm the one who voluntarily opts into a system that mines my data and online activities for profit so that it can attempt to manipulate me with tailored marketing campaigns. 

That's bad enough, so why should I put up with a bunch of assholes masquerading as friends too? 

I shouldn't. 

You shouldn't either.

No social media platform is truly free, and that's well and good. Capitalism is a thing. I get that the convenience of what is being offered comes at a privacy cost to us all. 

Some of us are good at resisting it, and some of us are victims of every sponsored ad, data-pulling quiz, and tracking app disguised as a game that gets suggested to us. 

If that's the case, though? I want to be surrounded by good people, meaningful connections, and positive influences.

I want my digital environment to be one that I benefit from by way of empowering and supportive connections while fending off corporate interests from every other facet of the experience. 

If I have a friend on my list whose posts make it into my feed as they troll people in the comments section of a news article, I have to ask myself what the point of staying friends with them is. 

I don't want to see that type of content. 

I certainly don't want to be friends with someone who participates in random arguments on the internet and goes out of their way to antagonize others in comments sections. 

I can understand the impulse but can't condone the actual act. 

I find it even more repugnant when it's about a topic that I know my friend has zero expertise in. 

Are we really letting people get away with this type of online behavior because of friendship?

Because that's sad. 

It makes me unhappy when I see it. 

And the one thing I ask of in a relationship is not to make me unhappy. 

Also, nobody is changing the world for the better by arguing online with strangers. 

I see enough of that from a friend and I just cut them loose from my feed.

Why stay friends? I deserve better. 

I mean, we all do.

I once shared the following quote on Facebook: "You must find the courage to leave the table if respect is no longer being served." 

It remains true, but especially so on social media. 

People who show up in your feeds with a barrage of argumentative or cynical observations are doing nothing for your health and wellness other than eroding whatever level of equanimity and enjoyment might have existed before their arrival. 

It's not just about serving me or even you respect, either. It's about serving respect to the world at large and the people in it. 

That's what everyone gets wrong about that quote in my opinion. They just apply it to themselves and their feelings, which, fair enough. 

But it works even better as a filter for everyone in your circle of friends.

You should be willing to leave the table when respect isn't being served to ANYONE.

Because a friend who will disrespect strangers online will inevitably disrespect you. 

Haters gonna hate. Trolls gonna troll.

Maybe not to your face. Probably behind your back. 

But disrespect you they will. Assholes can't help themselves.

Social media seems so vast and it seems to encourage people to say or do things they wouldn't do in a room full of people or one on one. 

The internet and the socials on it seem like this unfathomable expanse that goes on forever and is seemingly populated with every human being in the world. 

That expansiveness and the diffusion of accountability it fosters make people braver behind their keyboards than they would otherwise be in real life.

It's the difference between swimming in the ocean when you know there are killer whales in it and swimming in the pool at SeaWorld with Tilikum.

The water is infinitely deeper in the latter, but the danger exponentially increases in the former. 

The infinite deep is intoxicating for some people. They avoid the pool because they know how dangerous it is, but the ocean provides an escape that the pool doesn't. 

It offers avoidance by way of reduced proximity to seafaring mammals or people who will bite your fucking face off because of your bullshit. 

The feeling of being part of this massive collective that allows you to communicate near-instantly with people from all over the world is also something that appeals to us as social animals, even when we're using these platforms to be antisocial. 

When you're not on it or using it, it can feel weirdly dehumanizing and ironically disconnecting. 

It's not so much #fomo as it is the sense that you're living on an analog island in a digital ocean. You're not experiencing a fear of missing out because you don't even know what's happening.

Applying the "one bad apple doesn't spoil the whole bunch" philosophy to social media is all well and good, but social media often feels more like apple juice than apples. 

And if I poured a teaspoon of piss into a glass of apple juice, I'm pretty sure you'd pour it all out and go thirsty instead.

That's where I was with social media. Tired of drinking piss-flavored apple juice.

I left Facebook a couple of years ago, as much to start my YouTube channel as to take an analog break from the digital grind that social media represents. 

The moment I deleted Facebook, I instantly felt like a burden was lifted.

I also deleted Instagram, Twitter, and TikiTok completely, as well as social fitness sites like Strava and MyFitnessPal. 

It was a legitimately welcome break from each and every one of them when I did.

I realized shortly thereafter, though, that the platforms weren't entirely the problem. The friends were. The connections at the heart of the social media experience.

That was a sobering realization. It changed my entire perspective on social media. It eventually led to my return.

I'm back on Facebook because it has its uses, but my contact curation has changed to reflect a new perspective on digital social connections. 

I want my experience on social media to be positive. Or, at least, not negative. 

To that end, I'm going to enjoy the experience by removing that which makes it less enjoyable. 

Friends. 

I'm getting rid of as many of them as I can.

As an extension of the quote I shared, I would also leave the table if enjoyment wasn't being served. 

I wouldn't hesitate to leave or end a friendship that made me feel slighted in any way, shape, or form. 

Staying on a social platform and suffering through the posts of people I don't like is a ridiculous notion. 

It's like Stockholm Syndrome as the layperson believes it to exist, or learned helplessness in the face of people hijacking my joy or eroding it to nothing because I let them.

The problem isn't social media if I don't have a positive experience in the face of these considerations. 

The problem is my lack of boundaries. 

My inability to enforce those boundaries is another problem. 

An unwillingness to remove negative influences, in the form of people or content, is why the whole endeavor feels like a negative downward spiral.

It can be, sure. 

It doesn't have to be, though. 

I started 2021 with 330 friends on Facebook, down from around 400 in 2020. 

I was at 250 as I entered the last quarter of that year. 

By New Year's Day of 2022, I was well under 200.

As of this writing, I’m closing 2023 at 188 friends and hoping for fewer before 2024 arrives. 

My goal is to achieve a total that aligns with Robin Dunbar's number and to make those the best quality connections I can maintain. 

That will be a result of me leaving the table, so to speak, because respect and enjoyment are not being served.

This goes both ways, too. 

See something from me on Facebook or social media that you don't like or that hurts your feelings? You should unfriend me. 

We probably wouldn't get along in real life, so why stay connected to me on social media? 

I'm definitely going to unfriend you if I see something that bothers me enough to lower my enjoyment of social media. 

Besides, you'll be helping me reach my goal of reducing my friend count by unfriending me on Facebook if we're currently connected there. Thanks, buddy.

Sure, it gets a little more complex when the person you're unfriending is an actual friend in real life, but even then—friendships aren't meant to last forever.

Society has this oddly romanticized view of friendship as a somehow unending result of two people sharing an interest at some point in their lives. 

That's nice when it happens, but it's not guaranteed. 

Some people don't evolve as they age and some people do. You can't expect the latter to stay friends with the former as interests and intellect diverge. 

It's okay to outgrow people—even people you used to like. 

Friendships end. It's healthy when they do.

Or, as in social media, people you didn't really know when you first became friends turn out to be people who need to be unfriended. 

That first impression was enough to give it a try, but that's not exactly a lot of effort when you think about it. There's almost no due diligence there and that can create friction.

It seems to take very little to prompt a friend request from one person to another. Overlapping participation in a sport, hobby, or career can be all it takes to feel a connection to someone. 

Ding. Friend request sent.

Okay, fair enough. 

But if you're willing to send friendship requests so readily, then you must be equally willing to remove those people when it's clear that the relationship is less than superficial in value or worth. 

And if it's making you unhappy, it definitely needs to end.

Your friend count isn't a reflection of your worth as a person, but it could be affecting your self-worth. 

It's certainly affecting how you feel about yourself, social media, and the confluence of both, as well as the effects that ripple through your day-to-day living that are both obvious and hidden.

That's your "friends" list, and it's an insidious reducer of equanimity and joy.

Start reducing it and see if you don't suddenly have a better relationship with social media...and yourself.

[aita-ghosting]

Was I the asshole for ghosting a ghost?

I (22f) was in a group of friends with two other girls (Names changed here to Winnie and Sarah.) who were the same age as me. Sarah and I have known each other since high school, whereas Winnie and I met at a party about three years ago now. We three became close friends leading up to Winnie's wedding, and a lot of the time it felt like Winnie and I were closer friend with each other than with Sarah.

Throughout the three years of friendship we shared many hangout days, girls nights in, and well, a lot of effort to Winnies wedding. Sarah and I ran errands, did flower arrangements in advance, and agreed to do make-up and pick things up at the last minute in our roles as bridesmaids. I even spent a night altering Winnie's wedding dress while riddled with a flu.

However, as we approached the wedding date, Sarah and I noticed a bit of a change in Winnie, particularly in her attitude towards us. She started talking to us less, and when she did it was only to ask us to do something for her. She didn't initiate hangouts anymore. Now, we thought this was to be expected at first- after all, she was about to get married and that's got to be a stressful occasion.

The wedding day rolled around and Sarah and I helped make sure the day went smoothly. We helped Winnie get ready, and did the various tasks we were asked to do- including purchasing a knife for the cake cutting.

And almost immediately, Winnie ghosted us.

It was almost like a switch had been flicked and she didn't seem to want to see us anymore. We gave it a couple of months- newlyweds are newlyweds of course- but as time went on, nothing changed. She never contacted us, and when we tried to arrange hangouts in our shared group chat she left them on read.

Sarah and I kept hanging out, and became simultaneously concerned about and admittedly a little annoyed with Winnie- she does have social anxiety, but that was never an issue in our group until she ghosted us. She had voiced in the past that she felt very comfortable around us. So it made no sense to ghost like this.

We arranged a meet up to try and discuss it with her- wanting to make sure everything was ok, and that she was ok, as well as ask her to be a bit more active in our friendship. Any friendship needs to be 50-50 and not one sided. We talked, laughed it up a bit, and ultimately it was agreed that we would all put more effort into our little group.

Six months later and still no change has happened. All attempts to contact her are ignored. Her Facebook page is filled with positive updates in her life that she hasn't told Sarah or I about.

Finally, during a break from work I am lurking around a park drinking a cup of tea and who should stroll past, but Winnie?

I walk up to her and do a goofy little dance to try get her attention- y'know, as you do. But she utterly ignored me. No eye contact, no wave, nothing. She walked past as if I were not even there, and that really hurt. Even calling her name proved useless, and I know for certain it was her. She has very distinctive hair and features.

So after a long conversation Sarah and I decided to ghost her back- unfriending, blocking, and just removing any way she had of contacting us, because evidently she didn't want to be friends anymore.

Within days Winnie had tried to message Sarah, and asked a mutual friend to find out what she had done wrong, and I told him all that I have told you.

She posted a massive rant on Facebook detailing how upset she was and how terrible "certain people" were for "dropping her like a ton of bricks" which felt wrong, as she had done it to us first.

However, part of me is worried we did the wrong thing.

Am I the Asshole for ghosting the friend for ghosting us?

TL/DR: My friend ghosted our group and after nearly a year of radio silence is furious when we unfriend her.

[deviantartdramahub]

https://www.deviantart.com/comments/4/80757935/5070403795

Alright, today I'm talking about this thread to talk about this unfortunate encounter with this Probium person.

First things first, they intruded the conversation I was having with this Patchi person, who was fortunately way more kinder and understanding than the person I'm mainly talking about. But anyways, Probium for whatever reason thought our conversation was his business now, and entered to bring out their hatred. Also going "I don't intend to attack Club" *he says as he's attacking Club and immediately trying to get me to unfriend him* After I tried reasoning with him about how untrustworthy Club's harassers are, he spams me with two replies at once for some reason, the first one saying "I'm autistic (doctor-diagnosed). I don't RP with anyone, especially not including diaper fetish" Uhh okay I didn't ask, what does that have to do with anything?? I never said YOU were the bigoted one, you moron, and you're also further slandering Club by saying it's a fetish, so "I don't intend to attack Club" my ass. Then the other thing they said was "Why don't you look through it and analyse for yourself, and how do you know these are bigoted trolls? If I told you I was one of those people exposing him, AND I'm autistic (he claims to be autistic too), how would you feel?" Look through and analyse for myself? HONEY PLEASE, I've been a victim of theirs myself! I know damn well what's going on with those fuckers. Maybe don't assume I don't know shit when I do. And if you told me that I would be like "Okay I don't know you and you're admitting to contributing to the harassment of my friend?? Lol okay then ig get blocked." You want to pretend you're special, but you just invaded a conversation. You were never a friend, I won't treat you any different than I treat the other DADramaNow trolls, dear. Also it's a shame your contributing to ableism when you yourself have autism, tsk tsk.

They then wanted me to define bigoted and list reasons why I knew DADramaNow was that. So I did. I gave them a good list. And I'll admit the things about Tam was a misunderstanding. Though rather than talking about my reasons like a normal person, they simply brushed off ALL my reasons with a "no". Then proceeded to rant about Club. "In fact, I have reasons to believe Club is bigoted. Transgender woman named Eden Knight committed suicide knowing that she was sent to Saudi Arabia to possibly be executed? "Oh no! Anyway..." also, constantly shunning other people's stories and struggles to make way for his own to vent about his love for diaper 5yos and make the AUTISM excuse." Yeah now I definitely know the whole thing about "nOt InTeNdInG tO aTtAcK cLuB" is bullshit to try and look innocent. I'm not dumb or blind, honey. And explain to me how the living Hell that woman committing suicide should be blamed on Club??

Of course I was having NONE of this bullshit anymore. It was clear all this person wanted to do was slander my friend and didn't want to listen to a thing I said, Ig a sad attempt of manipulating me to get away from him? But that whole thing was just immature as fuck. I then cut ties with him there and blocked him after giving the final blow, bc there was absolutely no reason to continue dealing with that headache of a "conversation". Why bother trying to talk to someone if they're just gonna tune you out and only worry about what THEY think and what THEY have to say??

I honestly shouldn't even TRY to reason with people like this, yet I tried anyways. And look where that got me -_-

DADramaNow and their supporters don't want reason, they just want mindless slander.

The saddest part is people misunderstand how trust is supposed to work, and that gets us in this kind of situation.

[fvirytips]

How to drop a friend

I have a "friend" who I really don't get on with. She follows me everywhere, enbarrases me, and is obnoxiously loud. But I'm too shy to tell her that I'd rather end our friendship. So I'm gonna pass my knowledge onto YOU! The Internet can have my ideas 😭 oh yeah, and this won't be mean in any way, and I'll drop in some bible verses too ;)))

Ghost them

1 Corinthians 15:33- Do not be misled: “Bad company corrupts good character.”

If your friend is mean or rude then drop them! But if they're mean/rude then they'll probably get angry if you tell them that you don't like them explicitly. So ghosting them is probably the best option. Start by unfriending them on less used also such as roblox, Facebook (if anybody uses that 💀) or anything else.

If they ask just tell them simply that you are removing people from your friends list or you don't have anyone added anymore. But don't lie. Remember: Proverbs 12:22- "Lying lips are an abomination to the Lord, But those who deal faithfully are His delight."

Drift Apart

The easiest way is to just drift away naturally. Just don't talk to them. It's normal and completely natural for people's interests to change and for people to go separate ways. That doesn't mean you have to completely hate each other. Hate is bad. Maybe just interact less often!

Tell them

"B-but Zara! That's stupid! They'll hate me!"

John 15:18- "If the world hates you, remember it hated me first."

If people hate you, screw it. The only option that truly matters is the Lord's. If you gonna tell them, just say: "I'm so sorry, but I don't think we should be friends anymore" or "Is rather not be friends anymore"

It's hard. And at first, you'll feel awkward around them. But eventually, you're glad you did. It's really draining to be around people you don't like. Plus, who needs mean people? All you need is God.

But now I have no friends..!

Well, first, learn to be alone! Nothing is weird about being by yourself. However, we all love some company. Here's how to spot a good friend!

1 Thessalonians 5:11- "Therefore, encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing."

You should both encourage, compliment, and criticise (NICELY!💗) each other. Who likes a friend who's always negative.

Colossians 3:13- "Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you."

Forgive one another! We all make mistakes, even if they are messing up alot let them grow with you. Don't be mean, how would you like that? But if they are just being plain rude it's best to move on.

Also, remember that they don't have to believe. Of course, that's amazing if they do, but if they don't, as long as they are kidney hearted people and aren't disrespectful to God, I'm sure they're great! You can introduce them to God, too. God is waiting for them with open arms!

Prayer!

Dear Lord,

Help us to grow in our friendships. No matter how new, how tiring, how hard, help us to be kinder, encouraging, and kind-hearted to everyone we meet. Let us care for eachother and be more respectful to one another. Help me to spread your word to all that I meet and be a role model for others.

Amen!

[rookie-critic]

Missing (2023, dir. Nicholas D. Johnson & Will Merrick) - review by Rookie-Critic

Found footage horror is a genre of film that, though the market got a little over-saturated with it in the 2010s, has managed to turn out some of the most classic movies that modern horror has to offer. Movies like The Blair Witch Project, Paranormal Activity, and Cloverfield are all mainstays nowadays, not just among horror fans, but in the world of film, in general. It even started to eke outside of the horror world with films like 2012's Chronicle, which acts as more of a sci-fi, subversive superhero film than a horror one. Then, moving past just the idea of "person free-handing a physical camera in story that acts as the footage that makes up the film," 2014's Unfriended sought to slightly evolve the genre, taking the footage from the camera lens to the computer screen by choosing to tell its story through a screen recording. That format, too, would break out of the horror genre in 2018 with the John Cho-led film Searching, which presents as more of a crime-thriller. I mention all of this to bring context to the subject of today's review, Missing.

Acting as more of a spiritual successor than a sequel to Searching, Missing is another story told from the point-of-view of device screens: mainly the screen of a Macbook used by the film's main character. I walked into the theater thinking I was about to be underwhelmed by this movie. I never watched Searching, even though I love John Cho, because it seemed gimmicky to me (I never watched Unfriended, either). I wasn't sold that a story told in that format could convey itself as well as actually being able to get up and follow the characters' motions through the world they are inhabiting. So, when the trailer for Missing dropped, I had two thoughts: 1) I can't believe they made another one of these, and 2) it looks like they gave the whole film away in the trailer anyway. Imagine my surprise to then walk out of the theater two hours later, very impressed by the story they were able to weave. I was enthralled. The story, they mystery, the influence that the constraint of this storytelling format has on your imagination and your patience. It's as close as a movie can come to telling the story from a first person perspective, as you are just as in the dark as the main character is. There is only one time in the entire film where you are given information that the protagonist doesn't have, and even that is done in a way that doesn't break the flow of the format. The writing is so tightly wound and Storm Reid, who plays the film's protagonist, is so captivating that together they draw you in. You buy into the story (or at least I did) to the point where you're barely even noticing the "gimmick" of the film telling its story through device screens unless the filmmakers want you to notice. Directors Nicholas D. Johnson & Will Merrick have cracked that crucial ingredient to making a successful "found footage" film: you write a story that is benefited by using this format. You can't just slap a found footage style on a movie that could have been filmed in a more traditional style, you make it to where the found footage method is the only style that film can work in. I truly believe that Missing benefited greatly from this fairly new evolution on found footage, and would not have been even half as interesting had it been presented in any other format than this.

All my raving and rambling aside, it's still not a perfect film. There are almost too many plot twists or revelatory moments, so many that I came very close to getting plot twist fatigue, and that would be a major detriment to the film if its big "oh shit" plot twist wasn't so wild. It really wipes a lot of those other moments away and brings you back down, allowing you to buy back into the drama of it. The other big problem with the film is that a good chunk of the dialogue is pretty corny. There is an element of humor in the film, a lot of which is visual-based, and a lot of which I did quite enjoy, but the corny dialogue did come off as more of a distraction than an endearment, and it is pretty persistent throughout the entire movie. It won't be topping any "best of" lists or winning any awards, but Missing was deceptively very good, despite a couple of tiring elements, and it just proves that as long as the writing is solid and the story is strong, gimmicks don't have to be or feel gimmicky. Any format works as long as the effort and care are put in.

Score: 8/10

Currently only in theaters.

[eldritchsurveys]

1261.

by joybucket

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