#even if it is just angst lol
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Writing renkaza again tonight for the first time is almost three months. Perhaps the unrequited love tragedy fic was not the move. But. Yk.
#I missed them! I missed writing for them !!!!#however comma#still feel some complicated things about a lot of my fics#this one is easier cuz it was one I came up with on my own and developed pretty much by myself#still donât think Iâm gonna touch the ones we made together for a while#still donât know how I feel about that#but!!! am glad to get back into the swing of writing for them#even if it is just angst lol#kaz rambles
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double victory, was it? (it doesn't feel like one)
i saw a post about 3L!Grian meeting SL!Scar, but since SL!scar never died i figured he can't see any of the winners nor join them before the next session, and they appear before him as shadows. also, i thought 3L!Grian would be really happy to see a scenario where scar didnt die by his hand and actually won.
â bonus sketch â
#someone has probably done this before but i. dont. care. i wanted to draw scarian angst anyway#i dont do well with lore but my braincells are trying their best#trafficshipping#scarian#desertduo#trafficblr#life series#grian#goodtimeswithscar#gtws#3rd life smp#third life#secret life#watcher grian#grian fanart#goodtimeswithscar fanart#mcyt#my art#also sorry. i rewatched grians finale ep and howd he go from TRAITOR! to oh no i cant kill you :(#how could you FOLD that QUICKLY . im baffled lol#also i just had to say secret life red life scar skin. so beautiful#and lilacs and poppies? i know theyre scarian flowers at this point but to me its very grian#like wearing that on your outfit... sir sl!scar do you even remember what those flowers mean. are you yearning for something u dont remembe#im going insane#and here I THOUGHT im not going to get into any ships. im a clown#AU - Shadow Winners
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I feel fandom would get along a lot better if there was mutual understanding that liking a character, agreeing with a character, and thinking the character is well constructed/executed are all separate (if often overlapping) positions, each with their separate tastes and subjectivities. Also: character portrayals are intended to make the audience feel things; this is separate from (if often overlapping with) analyzing/appreciating their actions and role in the story.
#I would queue this because it's truly not character-specific#but there is always something happening with a character so that probably wouldn't help lol#anyway I'm making this nonrebloggable because I am not interested in the tomato throwing atmosphere out there#do not clown in bad faith on this post or in my inbox please I will just delete it#op#it's just over time I do see a pattern of like âI think X character was wrong in thisâ and some reactions being âyou *hate* X character!â#or that if you like a character you *must* agree with them and/or have such a deep an endless compassion for their faults and mistakes#that it comes all the way back around to removing their agency because HOW could they do any different#and if you do not give them this grace then it is antithetical to you liking them or enjoying them or even just being neutral on them#when this is often not the case#like as an Essek and Jonas Spahr enjoyer their fuck-ups are very essential to why they have any sort of âgrow as a personâ arc#characters *have* to have texture and foibles or they are stagnant in the story - let your fave fuck up a bit! As a treat!#and lastly I'll just say that my point here is NOT that everyone is always positive or that haterism doesn't exist.#Some commentary just seems to happen at different frequencies from each other and it catalyzes more angst than it needs to
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![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/2c163e70cb636641ecb74d2dd22c1965/62359927a19c239d-2c/s540x810/c7eecef6ffd5f4929fe6bbeb0079304895bbe906.jpg)
Self indulgence over here WOOPS
you gotta indulge me here,,, he's like a bug to me *pins him to the board*
#cw blood#cw needles#subway boss emmet#submas#fanart#submas angst#just in case even if its not rlly angst lol but i guess its the best way to have âemmet getting hurtâ tagged in an universal way#also the needle cw is just in case even tho these are pins .. once again easiest way to universally tag this#anyways sorry for the unusual art ahah it is very self indulgent for once....
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my body's aching like a knock-down drag-out
and my poor heart is an open wound A Childhood Friends Au snippet that very briefly delves into Danny's life post-accident. CW: Mild Mentions of Blood, Violence, VERY mild gore ig. Danny briefly recalls getting impaled during a fight.
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What they don't tell you about being dead is that it hurts. That it can hurt. That it can hurt more than when you were alive. That when you die, the emotions you die with stick with you like a leech that just won't let go. That emotions are ugly little thorns that stick their barbs into you and grow beneath your skin; or, at least, whateverâs left of it.Â
Danny is familiar with anger. It kept him warm in Gotham, when his parents weren't home from work and he and Jason were crowding Crime Alley with their presence. It kept him warm in Amity, when the fresh sting of moving was still needling into his heart and he wanted nothing more than to rip and tear into the closest person next to him.
He's familiar with violence. With fights. With death. He's seen people die in Crime Alley probably every day. From overdose, from gunshots, from stab wounds; anything that can kill, rest assured he's seen it. He's familiar with getting his own knuckles rough and bloody when other kids turn and bare their teeth at him and Jason; they're all just starving dogs stuck in a fighting pit, primed and ready to rip out each other's throats.Â
Black eyes, stomped hands, bloody noses. You name it; heâs had it. Gotham is paved with the blood of her children, and Danny likes to imagine that when he was born, the doctors handed his mother a file and told her; âTake it. Heâs going to need it for his teeth.âÂ
Dannyâs mom (and dad, for that matter) was too busy trying to keep him and Jazz fed, so Danny stole the file from her drawer with Jazzâs help, and did it himself. Â
Heâs familiar with anger, he thought he was getting better at it these days. It doesnât come to him as easily as it did before. Of course, that was before Jason died.Â
Danny is less familiar with grief. Caring kills and Gotham kills the caring, so Danny cares very little about other people. Or he tries to. But grief hurts. His grief hurts. It hurts too much. It hurts like a bug trying to crawl out of his chest; like a rat chewing a hole through his heart. Some days he wants to dig his hands into his hair and split himself down the middle. Some days he just wants to scream.Â
Heâs dead. Heâs dead. Heâs dead.Â
He wants the whole city to hear him wailing, some days. It sticks itself in the back of his throat like bile, and Danny is one wrong retch away from letting it loose. It sticks in his lungs like all the tar heâs smoked in since he was nine. It pushes and aches at his temples, in his head, like his brain is trying to swell out of his skull. His thoughts becoming so loud they threaten to commandeer his tongue. Â
He has no mouth, but he must scream.Â
Something they donât tell you about being dead is that it hurts. That it hurts more than when you were alive. Something they donât tell you about being dead is that itâs violent. That itâs bloody. Or as bloody as it can be when everyone has no blood.Â
Another thing they donât tell you about being dead, is that itâs a lot like Gotham that way.
With no threat of death, Dannyâs enemies forget death itself. Blood comes easy, like water, and teeth are encouraged. Bring your own fangs to the fight. Dying is something you can just walk off.Â
Dannyâs been dead for three months. He canât say heâs been walking it off easy. Heâs perfected the art of turning his nails into claws since his heart was still beating, but he canât say heâs perfected fighting other ghosts.Â
Scrappy is just not enough.Â
He feels like heâs back in Gotham again. Back in her death-shroud alleyways, fighting someone bigger than him. But thereâs no Jason to watch his back, and Danny has to get himself out of there alone. Or he might just not get up at all.Â
Black eyes, busted lips. Itâs familiar to him like an old scent, Danny isnât quite sure that heâs missed it. Itâs more familiar than his fights with Dash.Â
But thereâs no one else who can do it but him. Not Sam, not Tucker. He canât lose them too. He canât. He canât. He canât. His heart canât take another break, he already feels like heâs going insane.Â
With no threat of death, Dannyâs enemies fight like death themself. He learns why when Technus puts a street sign through his stomach one day. It pins him to the asphalt like a moth pinned by its wings.Â
Danny claws at the metal like how an animal caught in a trap chews off its leg, and every move is blinding pain. He thinks he was howling, but itâs hard to tell. He couldnât recognize the sound of his voice.Â
He bleeds green. It mixes in black with the pitch blackhole in his heart, which throbs and twists and cries in time with his reckless panic. The finger-choking terror of dying again strangles out the air he doesnât need. His blood evaporates, only to reabsorb into him. It just bleeds out again, cycling like a snake eating its own tail.Â
Danny breaks his nails clawing at the metal, and eventually gets it in his mind to pull it out. So he does, and the end drips ectoplasm green as he gets to his feet. In red-vision, Danny sends the sign back with snarling, vicious fervor. The pain is irrelevant in his rage.
Only after the fight does the hole the pole left start to close. Danny doesnât shift human until itâs gone. Unlike other injuries, a scar stays behind. Ugly; mottled, it aches for a week with every twist and stretch his body makes. He hates it.Â
Being dead is agony.Â
Every part of him is in pain. Every step, every word he speaks, everything he does, it is prerequisite with pain. The body is temporary, but the soul is forever, and death has carved into it with its freezing green hands and left him with never-ending heartache. It has torn from him and stolen what of him it could, and in return itâs left him with sorrow.Â
His pain is his grief, and heâs sobbed in the safety of his room more times than he can count. Itâs still as fresh as the day he heard the news of Jasonâs death. He knows, instinctively, that it will stay fresh forever.Â
In his room, Danny shoves his hands over his mouth and shrieks in whatever, muffled way he can into his pillow. Itâs not enough. Itâs never enough. He needs to be louder. He needs to be heard. He refuses to be.Â
Being dead hurts.Â
#tw mild gore#cw mild blood#cw mentioned violence#dpxdc#dp x dc#danny fenton is not the ghost king#dpxdc crossover#dpdc#dp x dc crossover#dead on main#dp x dc au#dp x dc fanfic#cfau#cfau danny#obsessed with the fact that danny just has the WORST fucking time after jason dies and baby i can make it worse#*kills you and makes you a banshee and puts you in an irrevocable state of grief*#delicious angst. danny is having the wORSt time ever lol. lmao even#was originally meant to explore the idea that danny can survive lethal injuries as phantom. which briefly got mentioned.#but i got away from myself. leaning reaaal heavy into the fact that danny's a banshee. At 19 he's got a pretty good handle of himself#but imagine being a fresh out the gate banshee. usually they get time to themselves in the zone to cry until their heart's content.#sorry danny. you have school tomorrow and family sleeping in the bedroom next door#kinda proud of myself. you can kinda see how Rath would've occurred here.#danny is going through it rn#was gonna add a snippet about the city's thoughts on phantom but couldnt fit it in
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this has been on my mind for a while, how would König react to a reader who was around when he was being bullied, not one of the bullies since I doubt he would forgive that even tho the sex would be nasty but like a girl who was on the side lines doing nothing and just hanging out with the bullies coming to him apologetically and wanting to make amends??
Oh what a delicious idea!
I meant to answer this with a quick reply but alas đ this turned into a short drabble almost
She wasnât one of the bullies, which means sheâs not someone who König would want to actively terminate (I hc him in some of my darker fics as someone who may or may not have killed his childhood bullies... and/or his father, which means König canât go back to Austria bc MEMORIES and also bc he has like a raging criminal record there). But sheâs an onlooker, practically an enabler, and used to hang out with his bullies, oh dear. König wouldnât be all too welcoming with her.
Chances are she was someone who König crushed on during school. Unattainable, he daydreamed about having her as his first girlfriend, but naturally that never happened... Now heâs suspicious to the point of being a little paranoid: he built a tough shell because of his past, so doe eyes and apologies wonât get you very far, even if König is intrigued. To be honest, his interest is piqued, but he won't let you see that in a million years.
Perhaps you reach out after a class meeting, some get together he never attended. You always wondered what happened to the cute, awkward nerd who sat behind you in class, the clumsy boy who talked of Rome, chivalry and knights while other boys wanted to be F1 drivers... Maybe you fantasized about asking him to help you with your history or math test, maybe you even blew him a kiss one time on dare to see if he'd walk straight into a wall (he did).
Maybe you dolled yourself up, just for him, excited to see König after over 10 years. To see if the awkward boy would still blush, to see what kind of man he has become... Chirp your regrets after a few blunts and some booze and see if he still fancied you.
But König never came. And of course he didnât, thatâs hardly a surprise. The regret within you builds until you bite the bullet and send a message to his old number, and after a few months, a reply finally arrives, but itâs not the most genial one.
König wants to meet you though⊠And the man, the thing he has become, makes it clear that he's not the shy awkward boy anymore.
You spend the whole evening trying to get over the sheer size of him, the lack of shaking hands, the distant cold stare with which he looks down at you. The fact that he works as a mercenary, that the boy who never hit anyone now kills people for money... The fact that he looks like someone who could wipe the floor with the young men you used to think were kinda cool.
König, however, is trying to decide what you want from him. Do you still think heâs a loser who never hit back because he wanted to be the better person? Do you think heâs a good for nothing man, even now, upon seeing that he finally succumbed to his hate?
Why do you even want to apologize after all these years?
Do you want an official pardon so that you can sleep your nights better? Or do you want to gawk at him because he chose to skip that stupid get together, perhaps gossip about him to the others and see if you could still find something to laugh at?
Heâs the perfect gentleman during your âdateâ, offers to pay for the food and wishes you all the best. You can see the hurt in his eyes, of course â he wants to make you feel even worse about yourself by being such a good joe, so you break before him when he tries to leave, apologizing again, even crying in front of him.
âI just wanted to know if youâre happy,â you say. âI just hope that everythingâs alright nowâŠâ
You lay your whole heart out in front of this man, but he's not the boy you used to know, not anymore.
He doesnât tell you that heâs not happy; he never was. Neither does he heed the wishes of his darker self, wanting to tell you that heâd be happy for a while if you blew him in the restroom. Heâs fucking better than that.
âWe were just kids,â he says instead.
And thatâs it: thatâs the apology. But you canât let him go, and neither can he, not when you humbly decided to come and rip all his wounds open.
Cue to a few months from the first date, youâre neck deep in love with him while König tells himself heâs only having fun. You could say heâs using you for sex; yes, heâs just dating this chick from high school... Youâre just someone he comes to fuck and cuddle during leaves. It's nothing serious, no. He can do without serious for a while.
And heâs not going to fall for your charms, no matter how sweet, authentic and loving you are... You make yourself so fucking easy to love, but he's not going to fall for that. Any other woman he'd worship, but not you.
Not you.
Not youâŠ
#könig angst#könig x reader#könig x you#sorry not even remotely sorry#lol the sex would still be nasty........#my god this might just bring out the worst in him
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I Said Just a Little Bit, Then I Got a Taste of It
Chapter VI
bjorn x fem!reader
summary: After being transferred to another sector of Jackson's Star you reluctantly befriend a ragtag group of people with the exception of one cocky asshole who knows just how to get under your skin.
On the surface, you hate each other, but after experiencing a particularly harrowing event together, the two of you grow closer than anyone else could ever imagine.
a/n: sorry for the major delay on this chapter everyone, I've been juggling a lot privately and professionally but I'll be back to regular updates over the course of the next week <3 also, just broke 20k with this update, woo!! summary for this chapter is: the art of self-sabotage. or, old habits die hard.
warnings: secret friends with benefits, enemies to lovers, angst, alcohol/drug use, nsfw, non-linear narrative, trauma bonding, resolved sexual tension, praise kink (both ways), oral (giving/receiving), loss of virginity, dirty talk, shower sex, falling in love
tags: @asvtrials @urfavhanna @orangebeauty @3arthtoeden @barnes70stark @sadslasher13 (comment if you wanna be notified when a new chapter drops)
wc: 2.8k
Masterlist Next Chapter
How could you let this happen? Be this stupid?
This is exactly what you didn't want, trying your absolute damnedest to bury your feelings for Bjorn deep, deep under the weight of denial and downplay butâyou can't, no matter how hard you try.
You're fighting an increasingly losing battle, falling further every time Bjorn comes around, every time he fucks you and holds you in his arms after. Every time he apologizes for whatever mean things he said in front of the others just so he can keep up the appearances you so desperately wanted to uphold. Every time he tucks your hair behind your ear and whispers that everything's going to be alright when nothing about this remotely is.
And you cry every time he leaves, finding it harder and harder to hold it in each time he does, like he's taking another piece of your heart with him every time he goes, crying salt into your pillow as you hug it close to your naked chest in the hours after, until your sobs taper off into pathetic wet sniffles, dehydrated and drained like youâre grieving a loss that hasnât yet come to fruition.
But it willâand thatâs the crux of it isnât it, because you know in your bones, in your soul that youâll lose this just like youâve lost everything else before, because youâve learned early on that everyone, no matter how much you need them, will always, always, leave in the end.
Itâs a tough pill to swallow but then again, the truth always is, so you do what you can to prepare for it, choosing to shatter the illusion of happiness yourself instead of waiting for it all to inevitably come crashing down around you, desperately hoping it wonât hurt as bad when you do.
A decision you come to after another night spent drinking in the quarry, most nights spent together spent drinking, alcohol the only thing that really takes the edge off after an incredibly long and difficult shift.
Slumped back into the camping chair youâre sitting in, the one that youâve unofficially claimed as yours, you quietly watch the familiar dance of flames everyone was sitting around, finishing off the last of your beer while the others talked and laughed.
Youâd been pretty quiet all night, barely contributing anything to the conversations happening around you, too busy in your own head contemplating how to dig yourself out of the hole youâve found yourself in as you tossed the now empty glass bottle into some nearby bushes.
Usually you'd stop after three, never one to catch anything more than a buzz but tonight, tonight you wanted to get absolutely shit-faced, wanted to shut out all the white noise inside your head, if only for a little while.
So you go to get up, intent on grabbing another drink from the worn down cooler Navarroâs feet were propped up on when Bjornâs voice made you freeze, asking, âneeda refill luv?â from the other side of the pit, head whipping up so hard you almost threw it out.
He mustâve been watching you, had to have been for him to have immediately noticed you were out, your stomach fluttering wildly at the assumption, doing your absolute damnedest not to show it on your face, no matter how badly you want to hiss at Bjorn, âwhat the fuck are you doingâsit back down!!!â but, you don't. Can't. The words dying in your throat every time you went to say it.
With your eyes glued to him, you watched as he walked around the burning steel drum towards his sister, his shoulders slouched and his chin down, the confident swagger he usually carries himself with gone and been replaced with a level of uncertainty you're not used to, one that helplessly flashes you back to shy blue eyes unable to meet yours just before he sucked on your breasts or stretched you open on his thick fingers.
You squeezed your thighs together, feeling wetness starting to seep between them. Not the time.
Bjorn nudged Navarroâs feet off the cooler lid, totally ignoring the scowl his sister threw at him while her hand was cupped around the dying cherry of her cigarette she was trying to keep from going out, fishing another bottle of aspen beer from the half melted ice in the process.
He came to a stop in front of you, holding the drink out by the glass neck to take, giving a smile meant just for you, so warm it had you burning hotter than the kindling wood behind him as everything briefly dissolved around you, like the entire universe was made up of just you, him, and the space in between, the warmth he was wearing radiating throughout your chest.
It was incredibly tender and brief and all wrong, the moment interrupted when Rain cleared her throat beside you, bringing you crashing back down to reality.
More than enough to make you recoilâhard. The bottle you'd been mid hand off slipping from your grip and shattering onto the pebbled stones between his and your feet, splashing chilled lager across both of your pant legs.
Bjorn had sworn under his breath then, asking you things like, âfuck, ahâ ya alright?â and, âyaâ ain't hurt ahâ ya,â darlin?ââ but youâd barely heard, had tuned it all out as your gaze swung wildly around the lopsided circle your friends were huddled in, all eyes on you.
Whether from the beer or from Bjorn you didn't knowâdidn't want to know, feeling severely scrutinized under the weight of their collective stare, like they could see right through you, like they knew what you were hiding, causing you to shrink down low into your seat, line of sight trained on the freshly wet gravel as you snapped at Bjorn that you didn't want his fucking handouts.
You could see the lower half of Bjornâs body go rigid from within your periphery, refusing to look up and meet his eyes, afraid of what you might find, of possibly seeing some of that blossoming affection youâd been feeling mirrored in his icy blues, waiting to let out the shaky exhale youâd been holding until he walked back to his seat.
No one commented on your bizarre little exchange, probably because they knew you were a flight risk, that youâd turn tail and run at the first sign of conflictâlike you always did, which is why you forced yourself to stay, not wanting to raise any more questions.
After the bonfire had ended Bjorn, like most nights, found his way back to your apartment, a bit cautious to approach you in your bedroom, probably sensing the sour mood he'd inadvertently put you in, asking for permission to touch while he crawled into your bed to join you.
And now here you are, Bjorn grunting as he thrusts into you once, twice, three more times before he finishes inside the condom buried eight inches deep between your legs, hairline damp from exertion with his bangs sticking to his forehead in sweaty little peninsulas.
He leans down, the cool metal of his dog tags brushing up your bare chest while he does, to plant an incredibly tender kiss to your lips, smiling into it when he feels you reciprocate, going in for a slew of quick pecks the same time he lets go of the leg heâs still holding up, fingers dimpling the back of your thigh.
âSo fuckinâ perfect,â he grins a little wider, still a bit winded as he tries catching his breath, rolling off of you to lie flat on his back instead, covered in a fresh set of scratches trailing down from his shoulders to the base of his spine.
There's a beat of silence, only punctuated by the mingling of your heavy breathing slowly returning to normal and the systematic tick of your alarm clock on the bedside table next to your head, feeling Bjorn's hand find its way into yours down between your bodies.
Tears start to crease along your waterlines, rapidly fluttering your lashes to try and blink them away, to not draw Bjornâs attention to how absolutely vulnerable you feel. This was a mistake. A big one. And not just tonightâall of it. Every kiss, every touch, every whispered filthy praise shared between you, closing your eyes for a moment, just long enough for you to work up the nerve and say, âwe have to talk,â voice thick with thinly-veiled emotion.
Bjorn perks up at that, rolling onto his side as he sat up on his elbow, cheek resting on a loosely curled fist, the shitty stick and poke of the losing dice frowny face he has tatted on the back of his right hand, one of the many Navarro gave him when he was fifteen and they were both high as a kite while giggling quietly on the floor of his bedroom as to not wake their dad, upside down from this angle.
âGlad yaâ said sumthinâ princess,â he smiles a shy, tiny thing you arenât used to, fighting the overwhelming urge to back out now, âcuz mâ pretty sure I feel thaâ same.â
You seriously doubt that, your suspicion sadly confirmed when he confesses, âI think mâ fallinâ foâ ya,ââ the same time you say, âI think we should stop seeing each other.â
More silence, exceptâthis one says a hell of a lot more.
Your throat goes tight and painful, like you just swallowed shards of glass and poured salt into the resulting wounds, watching the smile on his face quickly dissolve, replaced by a pinched frown and the confused furrow of his eyebrows, sitting all the way up to stare down at you.
âWhaâ?â He asks, so small and fragmented it feels like a knife stab to the chest having to hear it. Fuck, you knew it was going to sting,that you were in too deep by the time you realized you were falling for him, but you didn't expect it to hurt this bad, like you want to take it all back but you don'tâyou canât, for your sake and his.
âI said,â you push through the acute ache, disguising your tone with something harsher, something hurtful, âwe should stop seeing each other. It's justânot working out anymore.â
âMâ sorry but where in thaâ bloody fuck is this all cominâ from? I thought things wuzâ good between us,â he argues, using his hand to gesture between your body and his as you sit up against the headboard, pulling your blanket up over your chest so you aren't so exposed.
âWell, you were wrong. We justâwe aren't meant for each other. We're only hooking up out of convenience and you know it,â you reinforce, unable to meet his eyes head on, just like the quarry, gaze trained on the worn comforter by his naked thigh.
Still, you're able to catch a glimpse of the confusion on Bjorn's face morph into utter annoyance, snapping at you to, âcut thaâ shit already.â
âExcuse me?â You bristle immediately, letting your anger temporarily eclipse your pain so you don't break down in front of him, âfuck you if you think I'm lying.â
âOh, mâ sorry if mâ havinâ a hard time believinâ ya, but yaâ can't jusâ fake thaâ kinda chemistry. I'm willinâ taâ bet it all on black yaâ felt it jusâ as much as I did.â
You can see desperation bleed into his eyes, hear it seep into his words, wavering like he's not so sure anymore but still trying to convince himself that he's rightâand he is, you know in your bones that he is but he doesn't need to know that, muttering back, âwhat the fuck do you even know.â
His nostrils flare as a result, clearly offended by your statement, leaning in on his palm, fingers spread over your sweaty, wrinkled bed sheets, his gaze firmly transfixing itself on you, ââscuze me? Ahâ yaâ tryna be daft on purpose?â not giving you any room to respond before he continues on.
âListenâI can't speak foâ ya,â but I know whaâ I fuckinâ feel. Dâya really fuckinâ think I wanna feel like this?! Thaâ I wanted this taâ happen? Course fuckinâ not. I don't get close taâ people thaâ ain't mahâ family but then you. Yaâ came along anââI nevaâ intended taâ get taâ know yaâ at all. Yeah I thought yaâ wuz a total smokeshow when I first laid mahâ eyes on yaâ but I figured yaâ wouldn't stick around long with how bloody standoffish yaâ were, always lookinâ like ya' didn't wanna be there
âBut then yaâ did. Yaâ did anâ we almost fuckinâ died so I opened up taâ yaâ figurinâ we wuz both gonnasâ then yaâ let me touch ya.â Let me inside ya,â anâ I couldn't stop fuckinâ replayinâ it in mah' head thaâ night I slept ovaâ at Kay anâ Tyler's. Had taâ rub one out in thaâ bathroom anâ bite down on mahâ fuckin' fist like a hormonal tweener. I woulda been embarrassed if I wuzn't so fuckin' turned on.
âSo I had taâ go back foâ a round two, see if it wuz jusâ a fluke but once I was fuckinâ ya again I couldn't stop, I wanted more every time, like a fuckinâ junkie lookinâ foâ thaâ next fix, no mattaâ how hard I tried resistin.â But then I started taâ notice othaâ things âsides thaâ face yaâ make when I make yaâ pussy weep around mahâ cock anâ ya' sing so pretty foâ me,â he says, face neutral and tone even despite how hot your cheeks are hearing that.
âLike how carinâ ya' ahâ foâ thaâ othasâ despite actinâ like yaâ don't. Thaâ ya' had taâ grow up fasâ as fuck anâ took it out on yaselfâ instead oâ lashinâ out like anâ insecure prick. Like me. Tha' I thought I'd nevaâ seen someone so fuckin' beautiful in all mahâ life when yaâd fall asleep befoâ me, even when yaâ wuz droolinâ on mahâ chest and snorinâ like one oâ them fuckin' mininâ drills. Thaâ I thought I could listen taâ ya' horrendous singinâ in thaâ showaâ all day when yaâ woke up befoâ me. Thaâ I wanted taâ call yaâ mine foâ a fuckinâ while now.
Anâ I know I wuzn't jusâ imagininâ shit. I might be shit at expressinâ mahâ feelinsâ but so ahâ you. Yaâ canât convince me none oâ it wuz real.â
You consider trying to take it all back, while heâs still giving you an out, feeling like your heartâs been violently ripped out of your chest but you refrain from doing so, choosing to stand your ground, no matter how shaky the earth beneath you feels. You canât afford to lose someone again, itâll be better in the long run to ruin it now than to let life steal someone else away when you least expect it, when you canât possibly handle any more heartbreak.
Finally meeting his eyes you force yourself not to flinch at the intensity of his gaze as they scrutinize you, like he can see right through you, feeling more exposed now than you did when he first got you naked.
âIt wasnât,â you insist, somewhat petulantly.
Itâs his turn to roughly swallow at what you say, his confidence visibly waning in the slouch of his shoulders and the way he pulls back a little, the uncertainty of his words when you first confessed making a comebackâmuch stronger this time but still underscored by a level of defiance like heâs clinging on to some modicum of hope.
âSo allatâallat really meant absolutely nuthinâ taâ ya?ââ
You know you have to inflict maximum damage, to crush any chance of making the same mistake twice, finding yourself leaning in like he did earlier to emphasize your point, not deviating away from devastated blue as you hiss, ânothing. Nothing at all.â
And that was all it took, watching how quickly Bjorn turned his back to you while he quietly yanked on his clothes, shoulders shaking in anger, in rejectionâin defeat. He's hurting, it's more than obvious by the way his voice shakes, sounding like wet gravel as he croaks at you to, âhave a nice fuckinâ life,â before storming out of your apartment, leaving you alone, the silence you once found comfort in when you were on your own bordering on unbearable now.
It's for the best, you reason, it's what needs to happen, you don't need to make this any harder than it already fucking is, finally allowing yourself to break down, as pained sobs rack your body, crying so hard you grab at your chest like youâre trying to open another airway, gasping between each tearful moan.
So, if this is really for the bestâthen why does it feel like the worst decision youâve ever made?
#so happy to finally get this posted#even if it is all just angst lol#next chapter is gonna be fun to write :)#bjorn alien romulus x reader#bjorn x reader#bjorn alien romulus fic#bjorn alien romulus#alien romulus#spike fearn
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barbie from my shows <3
#theuntamededit#theuntameddaily#wei wuxian#cdramaedit#userkareena#asiandramanet#cdramasource#mdzs#cdrama#the untamed#*#my original idea for the dressing up gif was too complicated and i gave up before i even started it lol#but it's fine because i just wanted to finish this so i can move on to my angst era#what shoes would you choose for him? i know which ones i'd choose#scheduling this for the middle of the night so it's out there and i can forget about pink for a while#if barbie girl ends up on my spotify wrapped i won't even be surprised#q
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![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/b17c8d1ab9b413183fc3801d56d3e1e7/7c7b6f1382655d52-ac/s1280x1920/01e1de29720e02c030ea18f64dac2534743a9531.jpg)
turns out I have absolutely no chill whatsoever and followed up yesterday's Angry Nightmare Stabbing drawing with the Aftermath (ie Logan sobbing uncontrollably into Wade's chest until Wade - unbelievably - runs out of things to say - !!?!?!?! - and just lies there combing his hair with his fingers and kissing his forehead and murmuring little sweet loving comforting nothings into the air, while the blood from his head wound soaks into the pillow and mattress... of course it healed quickly but head wounds do bleed like a motherfucker so I imagine it would bleed even if it healed quickly)
this poolverine angst beast has got HANDS it turns out (and FANGS and CLAWS of course đ«Łđ« )
(Wolverine fangs and pointy lil ears are for @woof-verine )
#poolverine#deadpool and wolverine#wolverine#poolverine angst#soft poolverine with some blood#deadpool#deadclaws#deadpool & wolverine#wade wilson#wip#woolverine has fangs and pointy little ears fyi#just a detail of the larger piece but it's the only part I'm even a little bit happy with lol#deadpool fanart#poolverine fanart#blood tw
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merlin au where merlin keeps excalibur and returns to camelot to serve under gwen as court sorcerer after she repeals the ban. merlin remains for years, unaging, even as gwen dons wrinkle after wrinkle and spouts grey hair after grey hair. eventually, gwen passes without an heir and since merlin holds arthurâs sigil, he ascends the throne and leads camelot for years. eventually invaders come and slaughter the people and burn the fields etc etc and merlin goes out to fight. he fights like a demon, which is what they call him with his unnatural abilities and golden eyes, and merlin chases them from his kingdom - only, they slaughtered everyone within the citadel. there is no camelot, not anymore, not without her people. merlin shouldâve seen this coming as her one true ruler has been and will always be arthur. he waves a hand and puts out the fires and restores the buildings to their once gleaming glory then takes excalibur into the center and drives it into the stone. with the force and power behind it, merlin raises the earth around the kingdom and buries it away from further invasions.
he leaves the kingdom hidden beneath the earth and travels up to the surface to explore just how far the continent spreads. then theres new continents across the ocean and he explores those as well. he watches as the world expands and grows and learns and advances but humans go too far and begin to destroy the world and create weapons of mass destruction and threaten each other with war. merlin assumes arthur will come back considering the destruction of practically everything but he doesnât. tensions rise and snap and in the blink of an eye, humanity is chased back to their caves. with the loss of technology and modern ideas, humans revert back to their roots and connect with the elements which means they reconnect with magic. it takes another few thousand years for these humans to achieve the level of civilization merlin grew up in his first few decades of life.
different tribes are settled across the land but, thats the thing, over the course of the last few millennia (lets pretend land moves super quick plsplsplsplspls) the separate continents have collided with one another and practically the entire mass could be considered albion. heâs not even sure where the original land resides now. sooo heâs not even sure where camelot resides now. he really shouldâve set up some beacon so he could remember but its been thousands upon thousands of years. sue him for his memory being a little foggy. he wanders from tribe to tribe and learns from their new magic while acting as a physician which a lot of them consider him some sort of miracle healer considering his advanced medical knowledge. itâs a win-win tho, he learns new magic and they donât die. everyone is happy.
then during one such visits to a tribe, he finds a man of twenty summers with a head of golden hair like a crown and sunkissed skin from working outside all day and bright blue eyes that look like the very sky was captured in his gaze. merlin stands for a while and watches him dig around in the dirt, sweat gleaming on his brow, and his muscles rippling as he works. merlin can feel the countless years falling from his shoulders, he feels lighter on his feet, and pure happiness bubbles in him. a grin wide enough to split his face pulls at his lips.
he canât help himself from stumbling over toward his long lost best friend, his body awkward and gangly with excitement and when he calls out to arthur his voice seems younger than it has in millennia and he vaguely notices that his appearance of wizened old healer melted away to his twenty year old body. arthur looks up with a polite yet confused smile and greets him followed by a question and merlin is faced with the realization that arthur doesnât know him, doesnât remember him. merlin manages to keep a thin smile on his face as he reaches out with magic and finds an injury in his knee from years ago that mustâve been bothering him and excuses his use of arthurâs name as someone sending him to find him and help heal the injury.
anyways merlin and arthur become friends and set off on an adventure of gathering the knights of the round table from various tribes/villages and they eventually stumble upon gleaming white stone that merlin belatedly realizes camelot was built with. the knights all take turns tugging at the sword but it doesnât budge, not until arthur reaches out and tugs as if expecting it to be yâknow stuck in stone only it slides out like butter and he knocks the hilt on his forehead and knocks himself out it out. with the sword tugged from the earth, it rumbles and cracks and splits and a hidden kingdom arises from the dirt, gleaming white and shining in the sun. they stare in amazement and awe for a moment before they grow confused and distracted. then arthur turns to merlin and says his name in an all too familiar way and merlin starts sobbing bc arthur is finally back
#group hug and merlin finally has his friends back#btw gwen and morgana grew up in the same village/tribe as arthur and are with them on their adventures#i just didnt know how to pull that in lol#ik pangea proxima would take like 250 million years to form but lets overlook that#unless you want extra angst of merlin being alone for millions of years#but that seems a bit much even for me lol#arthur is crowned king and since there was no purge there was no hatred or fear of magic users#AND since camelot was the first kingdom as everyone else was still in their tribe/village stage#camelot just became like world capital :)#hey if alien planets can have one government so can earth#bbc merlin#merlin emrys#arthur pendragon#knights of the round table#morgana le fay#morgana pendragon#gwen#guinevere#i also left it vague for any ship to be established#but in my heart merthur are finally together just as mergwencelot are together#fanfiction#fanfic#fic idea#prompt
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Do you think if the trolls all came back, like everything in the main comic did happen and they were alive again. Do you think Feferi would actually forgive Eridan? Or want to even be his friend after everything? I don't personally like the erisol and fefertasprite interactionâŠfelt rushedâŠ..so I just wanted to know your opinion if things were different! :)
Yeah, I think they would be! Feferi is one of the trolls who takes dying the least badly (relentless optimism) and Eridan does genuinely feel bad, which means a lot when it's Eridan. I think she really is genuine when she says she wants them to be friends and also that she's really not the type of person to hold a grudge, and like... death is SUPER cheap in Homestuck, it's really not the horrific, irredeemable, irreperable damage that it is IRL - and if you're talking about (Feferi) and (Eridan), then they're both dead (and irrelevent) now, so the score is kind of even.
In general, the fandom - I mean, people in general, really - tend to have difficulty divorcing themselves from other people. We tend to assume that the people and characters they like will hold similar opinions to themselves. This is how people who like Karkat and don't like Eridan can mentally gloss over or even block out their clear, close friendship, or how people who dislike Cronus can end up overlooking that Meenah actually takes his opinion seriously and unironically defends his wizard thing. Feferi really isn't mad at Eridan or upset about dying the way we probably would be, because she's friends with the horrorterrors, relentlessly cheerful, comfortable with death in general, and death is also just not really that big of a deal in this setting. "I'm really sorry about that, that was shitty of me" is honestly probably all the apology she needs, especially if they came back to life anyway.
#i dunno in general the fandom loves to blow stuff up#and make it all way way angstier than it needs to be or was even shown to be#by all accounts feferi takes dying really well#im sure shes still not STOKED to be eridan's friend again but out of all her faults#holding long unreasonable grudges isnt really one of them#(that's a kanaya thing actually)#eridan's always gonna be an annoying pest to her in large doses but i think she basically thinks of him as a friend#also eridan responds to problems overwhelmingly with Fight#so this idea that eridan will be forever mopey and angsty also doesnt ring true to his character#if anything i can see him becoming annoying again because now he won't stop fucking apologizing#like bro chill its fine already oh my god why is everyt)(ing suc)( a PRODUCTION wit)( you#because thats the last point too like#homestuck always returns to humor#hussie even says in the book commentary that homestuck is lighthearted and comedic at its core#that it keeps returning to that as a touchstone#even during its tensest moments like murderstuck theres just constant funnies and gags#so i just end up going kinda :/ when an interpretation is purely maudlin or cathartic#like its more homestuck when its funny and characters treating murder with the same gravitas as irl#not only doesnt make sense in universe where death is cheap - ESPECIALLY for trolls#but also just doesn't really feel very homestuck to me#but that is 100% personal taste so if you like that stuff by all means keep enjoying it lol#you just arent going to get uber angst from me u_u
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Hatin' me ain't gon' get you love.
#I'm too tired to tag#and i just wanted to post something cause i feel it's been a while since i post some nath art here#even tho i practically draw him daily lol#casnath#my art#casthaniel#i wanna end the year with some angst cause that is my brand lol
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well hunter i think your scar is really cool!
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/194809554a7b013c3699a0ab9552ff91/fc3f531cb9bf3178-f7/s540x810/77c019f85f5077383d2289ba6e4328ccda81e191.jpg)
Hunter: Oh⊠thank you.
younger Hunter: Really?
You get two different responses! The reaction modern-day Hunter has to this, and the reaction he would have had if someone had said this to him when he was still a kid.
#Rw siblings au#Rw Hunter#I know the angst is bad when itâs even making ME sad lol#Poor baby Hunter#he just wanted some sort of validation or love#(to bad he never got any)#IâM SORRY#i just really like angst lol
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whoever this beloved anon was I am so touched by your kindness! You definitely didnât have to do this but I am so happy you enjoy this idea and I will happily expand upon it for you!
this is just a collection of word vomit bullet points for the time being but I will happily answer any and all questions about this pair!!
warnings: violence, angst, child death (Sarah Miller), foul language, the same warnings that apply to tlou, reader is Sarah's mom and described as having similar features to her.Â
So the general Idea is that you and Joel are happily married before the outbreak.Â
You had been Sarah's mother, his high school sweetheart he got pregnant when neither of you were old enough to have any reaction to the pregnancy test other than a fucking panic attack in one anotherâs arms. but you made it workÂ
you both worked but made time for one another and your sweet girl, going to museums every other weekend and joel insisting on swooping you off for a date every now and thenÂ
nothing special. He knows youâre more of a diner gal than anything too fancy that makes you both feel out of place.Â
On his birthday in 2003, you had planned to tell him that you were pregnant again. But the memories of your own fears of motherhood from all those years ago begin to swirl through your head again and you get cold feel. deciding to tell him the morning after
it is his birthday afterall, you want to focus on him.Â
but when youâre woken up in the middle of the night because tommy needs to get bailed out, Joel kisses you sweetly one last time before promising heâll be back and you canât shake the feeling that something bad is happening.Â
its you that shakes sarah awake that night. shouting at her to put on her shoes when sheâs still rubbing the sleep from her eyes because youâve been listening to the radio for the past two hours, calling joel again and again and again praying for him to fucking pick up but to no avail.Â
Sarah, bless your little girlâs bleeding heart is the one who insists you check on the adlerâs against your better suspicions and when you find the eldest looming over her daughter, blood and sinew dripping from her mouth, you grab your daughter hand and burst into a full sprint until something slams into your back and sends you tumbling onto their front lawn
its how joel finds you, struggling to keep the once sweet old woman, whose now nothing more than dead eyes and gnashing teeth straining to snap at your pulse point as you push against her while sarah shrieks before your husband runs forward and cracks her skull with a wrench.Â
thereâs hardly a moment of pause, just enough for him to pull you up and into his arms before heâs ushering you both into the car with an urgency.Â
when the truck crashes, you get separated from them. Perhaps at Tommyâs side when the flames rise and create a wall, separating you from your husband, or maybe pulled into the mob of chaos when trying to escape from those already infected-
all joel knows is that you promise youâll find him: just get sarah to safety and youâll meet him at the river
Poor thing is already so frightened, held in her fatherâs arms with tears streaming down her face insisting they canât leave you they just canât but her father kisses her forehead and reassures her its going to be okayÂ
âwe just need to be brave, okay babygirl? Your mamaâs real tough, sheâs gonna be alright.âÂ
he isnât sure if heâs saying it to his daughter or himself.Â
but when he comes to the river you arenât there. Only a soldier who points a gun at the scared little girl in his arms and then he loses everything
its when the light is gone from his daughterâs eyes that he realizes. His voice cracked and raw from sobbing that he looks around to see his brother with drawn in shoulders and tears in his eyes but his wife is nowhere to be found.Â
Tommy says you got lost in the chaos. Everything was so loud, so sudden that he turned around and suddenly you werenât there.Â
Joel wants to go back but its Tommy that stops him, that dulls the red in his vision to a sad faded pink because his brother points at the orange horizon not too far from them, so much of the city is already in flames.Â
âWeâre gonna find her, but not there.âÂ
So Joel searches. for the first year spent in the world post-outbreak its all he did.Â
He became a smuggler because of it.Â
Information came at a price and he needed to be able to fucking pay it, whether it be in blood or ration cards. He was willing to do anything to find you or any thin thread that lead your way.Â
But itâs Tommy that asks him to give up. Not in those words of course.Â
The youngest Miller knows better than to say something so cruel that would make his brother, the only person he has in this world turn on him.Â
But his voice is worried when he asks him one night in Boston when he hasnât even had the chance to wash the blood from his knucklesÂ
âYou think she would have wanted this for you?âÂ
the fight that followed his words was brutal. Vicious insults and scarred fists slamming against each brother until they're both too tired and bloody to continue. Each leaning against a wall for support and Tommyâs wavering voice breaking the silence.Â
âI donât know where she is, Joel. But I do know you're gonna get yourself killed if you keep lookinâ for her.âÂ
All he can do is nod.Â
Itâs a few days later when he meets Tess. Who has heard plenty of stories about the elder millerâs brutality and wants him to put that muscle to good use for some extra profit.Â
It begins his new life. One that empty and cold but one he can live.Â
Until of course, Ellie comes along. The sweet and incredibly opinionated girl that makes him become something akin to the man he thought died twenty years ago.Â
its when heâs traveling with Ellie, that it happens. When a warm familiarity has settled between the two because so much blood and pain has been shared he canât help but see her as something close, something bright even though all he can force himself to utter in her reference is âcargoâÂ
when theyre traveling through the woods as Ellie chatters away, probing his memory about a movie that may or may not have existed thirty years ago because her descriptions of the plot are incredibly odd he hears a voice shout for them to stop and finds himself staring at a man- no, a boy- pointing a gun at them.Â
Ellie stills, but Joel can see enough to know that from the lanky figure and dimpled face that heâs young. Maybe twenty, twenty-two at the oldest, but his eyes dart from Joel to Ellie with a pinprick of fear that allows Joel the time to charge forward and slam him to the ground before wrestling the gun from his hands.Â
He has enough to time to tuck it under the strangerâs chin before he hears the sound of the safety being turned off and finds himself looking up and seeing a gun just inches from his face.Â
Joelâs head whips around when Ellieâs voice calls out his name in fear, he turns to see another stranger holding her a gun point, shoulders drawn back and a shadow cast over their face by the had obstructing their identity.Â
âYou hurt one of mine, I hurt one of yours. That a fair deal?âÂ
Its takes him a moment to recognize you. Itâs been so long since heâs heard your voice, the sweet tease when you would poke at him each time he woke up late despite the fact that you reminded him to set his alarm the night before, the times youâd chide him with a harsh âJoel Miller!â whispered in public anytime he was able to grab you a bit too passionately to be appropriate in public but the laughter in your voice let him know you were never truly mad at him. You didnât know how to be.Â
But that sweetness is buried under a cold rasp that cuts through the air as you point a rifle at the scared little girl in front of you.
âYou think I wonât?â Youâre older now, skin covered in scars from a life he didnât know you got the chance to live and your eyes are cold as they regard your husband. âPut the gun down and get the fuck off of him, I wonât repeat myself.âÂ
Joel mumbles your name in awe. The woman he loved, the woman he mourned the one he fought so hard to find stands before him like some sort of hallucination and suddenly the world feels like its spinning until you bark orders at him again.Â
âYouâve got five seconds Joel, make a fucking choice before I make it for you.âÂ
He looks down and realizes the boy under him, the one with the bleeding nose and snarling face has your eyes and his dimples.Â
âOne.âÂ
The one above him has Sarahâs hair. Soft brown curls that shine under the sun.Â
âTwoâ
Wait. No, they both do.
âThree.âÂ
Twins. Jesus fucking Christ you had twins.Â
âFour.âÂ
Joel holds the rifle up above his head and the one boy standing snatches it from his grasp, tossing it to the ground and kicking it far from his reach. He slowly stands, allowing your son- dear god your son- to scramble to his feet.Â
Your voice softens just for a moment. âYou okay, Duke?âÂ
Blood stains the bottom half of his face from where Joel slammed his fist into the boyâs nose just moments before, but he nods nonetheless.Â
Now, they both stand on one side of you and he can see the resemblance clear as day the same way he would whenever Sarah was by your side.
When you order him to hand over his bag, he does so without question before telling Ellie to do the same.Â
She watches him with wide eyes, her hands still up in the air but gaping at her companion as if he had grown a second head.Â
âJoel!â âJust do it, alright?â
He doesnât miss the way you watch their interaction with narrowed eyes until she tosses her bag to you and you slowly lower your gun.Â
âNow, you want to tell me what the fuck you think youâre doinâ at my home?âÂ
#joel miller x reader#joel miller x you#i had an idea of something similar for tommy but on outbreak night he uh. abandons you instead of getting separated from you#because. angst :D#people say nice things#this was incredibly generous of you anon thank you so so much!#i may get myself a little starbucks drink this week now because I havent had starbucks since like january 1st lol#joel reeling from taking in all this information and also realizing he suckerpunched HIS OWN KID#id like to apologize for all the grammatical issues with this. this is just a bulletpoint word vomit to get my thoughts on the page before-#-beginning the actual fic. also I have to do a midterm tonight and this is my treat to myself hehe#but yes. joel getting separated from his wife on outbreak night and having to accept that shes probably dead#meanwhile youve lived this entire life without him because you think HES dead ad raising your boys all on your own#which just- further digs into his insecurities about failing in his role as a protector#he couldn't save sarah. he can't save ellie and he couldn't even save you#he thinks about you pregnant and alone. fending for yourself in a world full of infected and raiders and his chest grows tight again#this is all followed by Ellie going >:O 'you KNOW THIS PSYCHO?'and then joel immediately snapping at her to WATCH HER MOUTH#because that kid has no filter and he has to explain that youre his wife#anyways joels wife is a badass mfer who also maybe has a little garden and some chickens that you and your boys take care of <3 yeah .#reunion tag#ill be using that for this specific couple because I dont have a fic title yet but if anybody has suggestions!
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cw: pregnancy, kids (you guys have a daughter together), fwbâs, angst with a bit of a hopeful ending, refers to you as âgirlâ once
Friends with benefits Bakugou who never really got over his ego to fully commit to you. Youâre a little ashamed to admit it, but when you fell pregnant, you thought that things would change. That the whole âno feelingsâ aspect wouldâve been dropped, that he wouldâve embraced you fully.
But he justâŠdidnât? If anything, he distanced himself away from you, became so formal like you were another coworker he would address. It was heartbreaking, going through your first pregnancy feeling so, so alone, but having to grin and bear it the whole way through.
He supported you though in every way that he could. He never missed an appointment, would trek to your house during late nights whenever you craved something. He even moved you in to his own apartment during your last trimester, but a couple months after your baby was born, you went back home. You never felt unwelcome, but you couldnât pretend to be a happy family when he slept in the guest room every night.
So now, you coparent quite easily. At least, it seems easy to Bakugou, but really, itâs all a facade.
In all honesty? He thinks heâs a fuck up. An idiot. The stupidest, shittiest person whoâs ever existed.
He thought what he was doing was enough, that the words he didnât say carried across oceans, formulated into titles that he never verbalized. So when you told him you would be happy to coparent, his world felt upended suddenly, as he holds his tiny little baby girl in his arms.
Coparent? How could a couple coparent? Where did he go wrong? (He only slept in the guest room to give you and baby space, only moved you in late because you lived so far away and you were getting so big. He never said I love you because he was too embarrassed to say it out loud. He didnât know he had to say it out loud to solidify it. He thought you just knew.)
So itâs why his heart breaks when he catches a glimpse of curly blond hair and red eyes in the grocery store. He tries to duck behind an aisle, but his baby would recognize him anywhere. (Itâs true; youâve sent many videos of her recognizing him on billboards and tv commercials and magazines.)
âBakugou?â You call, ducking around the corner to catch a glimpse of him. He tries to act nonchalant like heâs looking at cans of soup, tries not to cringe at your formal name. He turns when you come into view, eyes drinking in your attire. His heart breaks a little when he recognizes the shirt you took in your second trimester, still has the pic you sent him of you grinning as you show off what you stole.
âHey.â Bakugou greets gruffly, mouth pulled tight, but it cracks into a grin when his daughter starts squealing. Sheâs in the front part of the shopping cart, twisting her little chunky body to get out and get to him. She damn near screams when he sets his basket down to pick her up, rubbing his nose to hers.
âHow ya doing, squirt?â He asks quietly, pecking at her chubby cheeks as she instantly starts babbling to him. He holds her close to his chest, eyes full of pure love for his baby girl, and it makes your heart squeeze so tight you think it might burst.
âThis isnât your neck of the woods.â You mutter, head tilting to the side as you take in your daughters excited face to see her father. Bakugouâs eyes snap to your own, letting his daughter play with his fingers in the meanwhile. He looks embarrassed, cheeks a dusty pink as he grumbles and looks away.
âI was just picking up some stuff to drop off for her. Was gonna text you and see if you were home,â he replies, and something tells you that itâs a lie. But you donât pester him about it, just nod a few times, taking in the sight.
He looks so good like that, in his compression shirt and sweats, his hair mussed from your daughters incessant pulling. Heâs grinning at her, but looks so bashful when he turns to you, like heâs thinking about things he knows he shouldnât, like he has a boatload to say but canât cough up.
And if you were a mind reader, youâd be so fucking right. He canât help but reminisce on before you got pregnant, the nights spent with you. The day you told him you were having a girl, the tears you cried when you delivered her. He thinks, filled with so much guilt the entire time, that he wants another one. With you.
ââS it okay if I walk my favorite girls home?â He asks you gruffly, nibbling on your daughters cheeks to hear her giggle again, uncaring of the drool she leaves on his hand. You feel your eyes widen at his term for you, face suddenly flushing. Favorite? You, his favorite?
Something tells you that you shouldnât fall down the rabbit hole that is Bakugou Katsuki and his suppressed emotions and shitty ego. But thereâs another something that tells you to trust it this time, to let things happen organically and without expectation. So you do.
âIâm sure she would love to show her daddy the new toy her grandma just brought her.â You tell him, giggling when he rolls his eyes at the mention of his mother. But he walks with you the entire time you finish up your grocery order, holding your daughter the whole time and pays for your groceries despite repeatedly telling him that he doesnât have to.
He pushes her in the stroller stored underneath the shopping cart on the way home, making small conversation. And when youâre halfway home, does he reach for your hand. Only to cross the cross walk though, he tells himself, only for your protection. But he doesnât let go until youâre in your own place, and even then, heâs close by the entire time. He helps you put away groceries, remembers where everything is like he lives here.
And for some reason, the familiarity makes your heart ache a little more than you would like it to.
#full of sadness tonight srry#but Iâm obsessed with this idea actually#I wanna expand on it even more in a fic#I donât like to write angst for him but this idea is just :(#heâs so shitty at communicating his feelings and you hate assuming things#so many things are just left unsaid for so long that you just force yourself to get over it and move on#and heâs so confused and so angry that you could leave him like that#but he never had you in the first place now did he?#ohh it makes me wanna sob#obviously in the end you get back together and have 98 more kids đ#but the journey along the way is RUFF#okay Iâm done writing my wrist hurts lol#bakugou treats! đŹ#ânew treat in the streets! đ«#dad bkg
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Fuck it, here's all my favorite Mikey-centric fanfics!!
There's A LOT + personal blurbs, so they're going under the cut (Mostly AO3, but there are some FFN links, too. Also, besides like the first two, there's no favoritism in the order)
2k3:
Pretend That I Never Left by redstringraven(sirimiri) - Complete/Plans for an Epilogue & Sequel!!
Fic that changed my BRAIN?! If my fanart [1 | 2 | 3] for it is any indicator, lol. I'll say for the umpteenth time that if you're looking for an Excellent Mikey fic with Perfect Characterization, this is IT (and you don't need to know ANYTHING about HZD trust me TRUST ME this fic deserves WAY more love) His swift ride-or-die friendship with Aloy will melt your damn heart!
Dragon of the Sun by ForestWhisper3 - Ongoing
My Other TOP favorite Mikey fic!! Again, fanart [1 | 2 | 3] indicator! Slow Burn(ish) Canon Divergence of Mikey unlocking his Mystic Powers as his family looks on in dismay as they struggle to protect him. The Good Shit!!!
Of Darkness And Light by Bayluff - Complete
OOOOOOO THIS ONE! Very good (also drew fanart for it)! Evil creature literally trying to consume Mikey's lifeforce from within as his family scrambles to help
A Chat With The Titan by secreterces5 - Complete
Mikey has a fun one-on-one talk with the supposedly reformed Bishop in Fast Forward. Mikey vaguely threatening Bishop, HEEHEE
A Simple Act Of Kindness by UlisaBarbic - Complete
That feel when you put your worth in what you can DO and the wish to be Acknowledged and the ONE thing you thought you did right was taken away OOGH AGH OOOOGH
Difficulty Breathing by RealityBreakGirl - Complete
Mikey did not come out of Grudge Match unscathed *smile* Truly one of my favorite 03 Mikey prompts to read about (honestly just check the entirety of the Grudge Match tag on AO3 for a fun time)
"A delivery boy! Uh, or turtle." by LollyHolly99 - Complete
Fic that has the distinction of being the first one I ever did fanart for! Gender Feels for Mikey cuz they're just like me FR!!
What Darkness Most Fears by UlisaBarbic - Complete
OOOGH AGH I LOVE THIS ONE!! Mikey has to save his bros from the clutches of an evil spirit while surviving horrifying monsters and battling a wicked fever!
Michelangelo by ForestWhisper3 - Complete
Mikey through the eyes of his family and how much they respect him and know him UwU
Mikey's Jigsaw by SailorSaysAhoy - Complete
Another awesome gender Mikey fic HOOHAA
Train-Wreck of Thought by halogalopaghost - Complete
When you're so talented you learn how to astral project but you start using it for pranks instead of understanding the drawbacks of said power and that bites you majorly in the ass big time (very good my stomach turned while reading this /pos)
A Brother's Bond by SuperKat - Complete
Mikey gets Real Sick and the fam can't help but remember last time one of them got so ill. OH MAN heartstrings WILL be pulled in this one!!
The Most Wonderful Time of the Year by moogsthewriter - Complete
Why can't Mikey ever catch a break during Christmas! A short fic that I enjoy Immensely for Mikey being stubbornly heroic and his family desperately trying to play catch up to help him
Questioning Choices by Mystic Medjai - Complete
Fun day at the beach goes catastrophically bad and the fam has to make difficult decisions to keep Mikey alive. THIS THIS THIS!! If I could pour this into my veins for the perfectly paced plot and characterization...
When It Counts by Kallasilya - Complete
Short fic of Mikey stubbornly and bitterly proving his brothers wrong (+ Don being a good brother)
Favourite Disease by devirnis - Complete
Mikey is forced to save his brothers as his body gradually falls apart from the inside. SO GOOD UGH Mikey being forced to deal with situations on his own always show how far he can Shine!
Nowhere Boy by taizi - Complete
OOOH I dunno how I can summarize this without giving the plot away but just know Mikey pulls through by thinking of his family
To Fit the Crime by T33la - Complete
AHHH AHHHH AHHHHH AHHHHHHHH!! Mikey is accused of Murder and receives his sentence before his brothers can even jump to his defense! Oh the twists and turns of this murder mystery!!
you want to know why i sit and sigh (the night is so young it hurts) by love_killed_the_superstar - Complete
Angel and Mikey bonding over comics and unsupportive brothers So Cute)
imma be real with you (cause i started being real with me) by love_killed_the_superstar - Complete
Leo and Usagi being supportive of Mikey as he struggles to train for the upcoming Battle Nexus fight (and also maybe they flirt with each other a teensy bit)
just a hop, skip, and a jump away by baba_buoy - Complete
Mikey sick fic. Heart melting amounts of comfort UwU
Weak Link by yellowhollyhock - Complete
Sweet fic of Mikey feeling insecure about his place on the team, and Leo going through great lengths to prove him wrong like a good older brother :')
'Cause you are the sun, he is your moon/And though he can't speak, he will thank you soon by naivesilver - Complete
Post-Grudge Match Mikey waking up in the middle of the night bitter and sore and gods damn why's Raph awake, too?
Hunted by DysfunctionalRequest - Complete
Mikey wandering the woods alone in the middle of the night and having a VERY unfortunate encounter with hunters
Flipbook by T33la - Complete
Heartfelt moment between Mikey and Don concerning SAINW that makes me want to smash a cinder block against my head /pos
Dramaturgy by Completely_Unaware - Ongoing
Mind the tags! Mikey deals with a Battle Nexus loss in an unhealthy way (UmU)
The Red Means I Love You (Work) by AnonymousCritter - Ongoing
MIND THE TAGS! AU of Fast Forward. Mikey isn't saved from the traffickers in time and things spiral from there
The So-Called "Champion of the Battle Nexus" by 0ozero0 - Ongoing
Grudge Match canon divergence where Mikey gets hurt a little more seriously than in canon (but still wins)
2012:
Devil took your hand by moogsthewriter & taizi - Complete
Mikey mind controlled by the Shredder moment!! *laughs through my pain and tears and screaming*
walk with open hands by taizi - Complete
Mikey gets his hands on one of Renet's watches and things go topsy turvy from there (and it HURTS ME)
(un)reality by SpectrumWriting - Complete
Mind the Tags! Dimension X AU where Mikey is captured by the Kraang and is put through the wringer in more ways than one (OWIE)
evermore (Dimension X AU) series by coffeejellyenthusiast - Complete?
Mind the Tags! Mikey was in Dimension X for over a year and he's NOT OKAY
Gravitational Collapse series by Writing_In_Denial - Ongoing
MIND THE TAGS!! An Incredible it gets worse before it gets better series of Mikey being unintentionally abandoned by his brothers post-series and dealing with some Major Isolation and OOOGH IT HURTS ME SO MUCH BUT I WILL KEEP READING FOR THE EVENTUAL COMFORT
traveling so far to get there by taizi - Complete
Mikey and Raph getting stuck in an empty, post-apocalyptic world and struggling to survive (their BOND IN THIS IS SO SWEET WEH)
Rise:
nice, nice by postergirlsprank - Complete
Short fic of Casey Sr and Mikey bonding after an unfortunate encounter while on a snack run (Hey if you want more context for how this author writes Casey, go read his fic Imperfect Animals too heehoo)
either way, we're not alone by sinaesthesis - Complete
Mikey throughout the years of the Kraang Apocalypse (Lots of Loss and Hurt and Badassery)
going under by redhairedmuses - Complete
Mikey almost drowns during a fight with a mutant
Hyperactive Hypothermia by VeryAngryGremlin - Complete
After Mikey's winter wear accidentally goes in flames and a villain-enduced avalanche, Donnie struggles to keep his baby brother warm
thatâs where the bloodâs supposed to be! by Dragon_Scales_and_Fairy_Tales - Complete
With Raph and Leo constantly bickering, Mikey ignores a very serious injury after a fight with Meat Sweats
Clever Little Dino! by VeryAngryGremlin - Complete
Mikey trying to keep a robot pet a secret and suffering the consequences
Vs The World by DysfunctionalRequest - Complete
The aftermath of the Kraang strains the family's bonds, and Mikey feels hopelessly alone (and definitely isn't dealing with his trauma properly)
Empathy Amplified by Filsamek - Complete
When you accidentally use your powers to connect with your brothers' emotions then purposefully use them to ease their pain
Sunshine in the Rain by Carnati0n_bl00m - Complete
Probably the first fic I read after watching the Rise movie cuz I wanted to find something Mikey-centric involving Bishop and BOY does it deliver with the additional bonus of Leatherhead!! (also hey look fanart)
A Mystic Connection by rytheoneandonly - Complete
Mikey's mystic powers manifesting and evolving in ways he could never predict (aka Long Fic of Mikey stumbling to figure out why he wakes up exhausted and hurt every night)
The whole world in your corner series by GibbousLunation - Complete
Two fics of Mikey being Mikey and his bros being protective
Better Check Twice by Marz_Zero - Ongoing
Bishop captures a turtle with a bear trap (OW) and is an absolute bastard about it
Come Home Soon by Sherlock_Brolmes - Ongoing
With his brothers unavailable, Mikey (with the help of a former enemy) uncovers a massive conspiracy involving New York and the Hidden City. I LOVE THIS I LOVE SOLO DUO TEAM-UPS!!!! *PUNCHES THE AIR 13 TIMES*
Mikey's Artistic Guide to Dealing with Trauma and Fame by Origami_Nami - Ongoing
Mikey using graffiti as an outlet and accidentally becoming famous
Rook by unorthodoxx - Ongoing
Another Bishop fic of him outwitting the turtles to abduct one of them (Mikey)
Multi/Other:
Mystic Malfunction by VanillaVengeance - Ongoing
Rise Mikey accidentally portals himself to the 2012 Universe and struggles to survive and avoid this other version of his family (with mixed success). The progression of familial bonds in this is just *Chef's Kiss*
The Gauntlet by T33la - Complete
A mix of IDW & 03, a wonderful showcase of how Donnie and Mikey support each other (also, a cool invention and a big rocket and a terrifying near-death experience are involved)
I Get Knocked Down (But I Get Up Again) by Justalittleobsessed - Ongoing
MIND THE TAGS!!! Set in its own original iteration, Mikey has been immortal for as long as he can remember, and he's used to his occasional deaths (and revivals). But then his brothers find out... (AGH AGH THIS ALSO HURTS MEEEEE BUT OOGH the comfort and hope of the later chapters is so Worth It)
Whumptober 2023 series by Justalittleobsessed - Ongoing?
Collection of Mikey-centric one-shots from different iterations and feeling the HURT (Personal favorites are If Only the World Could Stop Spinning..., Just a Flesh Wound, and Not the Best of Days)
To Know Peace (You Gotta Let Go) by Deadpool1763492 - Ongoing (technically)
The Last Ronin Spoilers!! Mikey survives and whisks the new turtle tots away to live on a farm instead of being raised as soldiers. (AUUUUUU THE FEELS!! THE TOTS! MIKEYYYY!!!)
How to accidentally kidnap yourself several times over by Camildeni - Ongoing
Rise Mikey gets captured and accidentally summons other iterations (03, 12, and Bay) of himself trying to get out! They do NOT have a good time!! (but at least they have each other)
the dad diaries by angelmichelangelo - Ongoing
More TLR Mikey being a Dad (and dealing with his trauma sorta kinda)
The neighboring cell by SaltyYagi - Ongoing
2012 Mikey and Rise Leo trying to escape Dimension X together (and bonding)
Bonus Non-Mikey-centric:
Weathered Strings, Tethered Wings by Deadpool1763492 - Ongoing
(2003) SAINW AU!!! With the possibility of Don being alive dangled in front of them, the remaining turtles begrudgingly reunite to save him. Drew a cover for this with more art to come! LOVING the slow burn of reconciliation between these bitter old turtles UwU (Bitter Old Mikey my poor Bestie)
Mutant Nightmare by HamsterMasterSamster - Complete
(2003) The immediate aftermath of Worlds Collide
Hanging By A Turtle by CamsthiSky - Complete
(Rise) Literally the turtles struggling to get out of a deep pit they're hanging over
Shell Game by T33la - Complete
(2003) OKAY OKAY SO!!! OOGH Don encounters something Impossible while prepping a tracking device (for himself) and it snowballs into another Renet-involved time adventure (AND UMMM lots of existential contemplation and a surprise historical guest who's Very Cool)
Turtle Power by halogalopaghost - Complete
(2003) Immediate aftermath of the star ship reactor explosion in Exodus
Disposable by orphan_account (kudos to you wherever you are, author) - Complete
(2003) Bishop captures Don and Mikey and gives them a terrible choice
Dissection by AmevelloBlue - Complete
(2003) So much Comfort after the trauma of Worlds Collide (ie Don's interrogation and Mikey almost getting sliced open)
Find the Road by SillySocks - Complete
(2003) Perfect encapsulation of the family as they cope with Leo's absence while he trains with the Ancient One
Handle with Care by HamsterMasterSamster - Complete
(2003) April is seriously injured during a mission and has to deal with the turtles distancing themselves from her as she recovers
mind-body problem by hiraethseok - Complete
(2003) April and the Turtles Being Siblings the Fic
Healing in Tandem by Eggstasy - Complete
(2003) Canon divergence of Worlds Collide where Splinter is just a little too late to intervene before Bishop starts sawing into Mikey's shell
Let's Take Ibuprofen Together by GreenGoddessSmoothie - Ongoing
(2003) The turtles swap body and have learn to cope with each other's chronic pain
Not the Face I Know by GreenGoddessSmoothie - Ongoing
(2003) Mikey accidentally makes a wish that changes his family's lives forever (THEY'RE HUMAN THEY BECOME HUMAN AND THE PLOT IS COOL AND ALSO QUEER THEMES MY BELOVED)
The Great Skittle Heist of 2105 by AmevelloBlue - Ongoing
(2003) AU of Fast Forward where the Dark Turtles are babies instead and are very swiftly adopted by the Fam
The Labyrinth by HALFnHALF1 - Ongoing
(Mix of IDW/03) The Turtles wake up separated in a labyrinth with only a mysterious voice in their heads to guide them (and manipulate them)
âYou didnât tell me your extended family was in town!â by BoStaffsAreCool - Ongoing
Post-Turtles Forever. The 03 fam is Just beginning to wind down after the events of the movie and look who's knocking at April's door (the 87 turtles)
#tmnt#tmnt 2003#tmnt 2k3#tmnt 2012#rottmnt#tmnt Mikey#fic recs#bamf mikey#all day every day#hurt/comfort#angst#whump#no hurt/no comfort though!!! I don't really like fics where it's doom and gloom with no comfort catharsis at the end#let me know if I should add Mind the Tags to other fics my gauge for hurt is a little wonky#lots of gender feels for 2k3 Mikey because that's just who he is#I added the bonus fics cuz I wasn't gonna make a separate post for them so cope and enjoy if you wanna#sorry there's not that many 12 or even Rise ones I don't look for those as much as 03 (I am biased lol)#wow can y'all believe I started drafting this in like May of Last Year???#anyways anyways I'll update this whenever I find another good Mikey fic#feel free to drop Mikey fic recs in my askbox and I'll let you know if I've tried reading them or not (I probably have)#lokibeann if you're reading this sorry it took longer than I said it would to post this I underestimated how long it would take and-#overestimated my ability to remember the plots of the ones I haven't read in a while lol
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