#even before they accept they love each other
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girlatmirror ¡ 2 days ago
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does he know? jjk
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‘she told you she’s celibate, she told me i could nail her shit’. in which your ex comes back to town, but you are in a new relationship.
ex bf! jungkook x reader
warnings: (kinda??) cheating, there’s some angsty themes (but not rlly idk), mentions of alcohol consumption, yn is a little mean sometimes (but she’s so real), yn is the president of #ihatemybf nation, unprotected, penetrative sex (be safe), ass eating (yup, jk is a munch thru n thru), idk what else
___
Jungkook and your brother, Zane, were always attached at the hip as you grew up in the same neighborhood. Your house was across from the Jeons' house, and ever since you could remember, you had a crush on Jungkook. Jungkook, the boy who stole your heart the moment he came over to play soccer with your brother and accidentally kicked the ball against your head at the tender age of 10, then apologized with a warm hug. You were eight when that happened, but you knew everything. You knew you wanted to marry that boy, and you knew what you felt was real. What you did not know was that the same boy would steal your heart years later and take it with him to Singapore, leaving you stranded.
Your love story started when you began attending college, the same one that Jungkook attended; surprisingly, it wasn’t the same as Zane’s. To Jungkook, that meant he could make a move on you without the awkwardness of your brother and your parents around. After years of waiting for the right time, Jungkook took the chance when Zane told him you were unsure about where to apply to major in psychology. Of course, he recommended that you apply to his school, which, thankfully, had an amazing psychology program. You took his advice and started attending the same university.
Jungkook became your bodyguard, even though he was a computer science major in his junior year, guiding you everywhere and protecting you from any harm, basically never leaving your side. At first, he claimed it was an oath to protect his buddy’s little sister, but at one point, he finally gathered the courage to profess his love for you and asked you out; of course, you agreed, and that’s where your love story began. That’s where a year filled with love, princess treatment, and pampering started. Your relationship remained strong even after he graduated; you continued going on dates, making time for each other daily, and being completely and utterly in love.
Until he received an offer to become a CFO of a large Microsoft company in Singapore, he accepted the offer despite your objections.
___
(a year and a half ago)
“Jungkook, baby, I’m here!” you shouted as you entered his upscale apartment with your spare key, which he had given you the moment he bought the apartment. “Sorry, I’m a little early; I was bored and by myself.”
Jungkook was taking a shower, smiling as his heart warmed at the sound of your voice. “That’s okay, baby. Come join me.”
“No, I already showered before I came here, but you enjoy!” you exclaimed with a giggle, looking for something to occupy yourself until he got out of the shower.
His bedroom was spacious and very neat; Jungkook was a clean person, a quality you cherished about him a lot.
You were bored, trying to find something to entertain yourself with until he got out of the shower when you found something that made your heart race.
On the nightstand, under a book he was currently reading, were two plane tickets. You quickly grabbed one and thoroughly read what was written on it.
* Name: Jungkook Jeon
* Date of Flight: January 15, 2021
* Flight Number: SQ 25
* Airline: Singapore Airlines
* Departure:
* Airport: John F. Kennedy International Airport (JFK), New York, USA
* Time: 10:00 AM (EST)
* Arrival:
* Airport: Singapore Changi Airport (SIN), Singapore
* Time: January 16, 2021, 5:00 PM (SGT)
Class: Business
January 15 was just three weeks away. Jungkook hadn’t said a word about his trip to you. He mentioned the business opportunity he received in Singapore once, but you quickly shut down any further talk about it, completely against the idea of him leaving. He hadn’t talked about it since.
Your heart stopped for a millisecond, shock taking over your body. With shaky hands, you quickly grabbed the other ticket; it was the same flight but for a different passenger.
Your name was written on it.
Just as you tried to compose yourself, you heard a click from the bathroom door; Jungkook had finished his shower. You quickly put the tickets back where you found them. He entered the bedroom with a big smile, a towel hugging his lower body, strong arms and defined abs on display.
“Hey, gorgeous,” he leaned over your frozen body and planted a kiss on your lips before noticing the tenseness in your posture. “Hey…what’s wrong, my angel?”
“What’s wrong?” You let out a humorless laugh. “What’s wrong??”
Jungkook stood in front of you, confused and nervous, still half-naked in just a towel.
You grabbed the tickets and faced him. The color drained from his face.
“Baby, I was gonna tell you about it,” he tried to explain, but your harsh expression didn’t soften.
“When? The day you’re supposed to leave?” you said sarcastically. “Oh wait, I’m sorry, the day we are supposed to leave?”
“Yn…” the voice you usually loved suddenly angered you.
“No! Just no! How could you do that?! I told you, I don’t want this!!” Angry tears started forming in your eyes. “You can’t just make a huge decision like this without telling me!”
“I know it wasn’t a good move, baby, but this is a huge opportunity for me; you have to understand,” he tried to touch your waist, but you pushed his hands away.
“You’re joking, right?” you exclaimed, your hand in your hair as you chaotically walked around with the plane tickets in your hand before stopping. “It’s not like I don’t understand; I do! But I don’t understand how you can just decide something so big for both of us and assume I’m going to go along with it!!”
The tension between you and him could be cut with a knife, your words throwing flames of anger at him.
“Yn, if you would just listen to me for a second,” Jungkook’s voice was steady, but there was a hint of desperation. “I want you to come with me; you can continue your studies there, and we’ll get married. We can come back for every holiday and every vacation I get; it’s gonna be good. We’ll be fine.”
“And you haven’t once stopped to think about what I want? If I want to leave everything behind and move with you to Singapore, only to come back on HOLIDAYS?? Jungkook, my family is here; damn it, your whole family is here. Did you not think this through?” you yelled at him, pushing your fingers against his chest. “And what’s wrong with your current job? It pays well; it’s here! There’s nothing wrong with it.”
“I just graduated from college last year! Do you know how often I could get an opportunity like this? Probably never, and let’s be honest, nobody’s getting any younger, so I’m going to take this job!” he exclaimed, but then his voice softened again. “I can provide for us with this position, Yn; I’m going to be a millionaire my first year. This is what I dreamed of ever since I started college: to get a good job and be set for life, not just for myself, but for my future wife as well, for you.”
“Well, I guess your future wife’s a very lucky woman then, but I’m sorry, Jungkook,” you took a deep breath, tears still brimming in your eyes. “It’s not going to be me.”
Jungkook got on his knees, his head touching your leg as he begged. “Don’t say that, Yn, please don’t.”
“I’m sorry; I just cannot do this. Not right now.” You left the bedroom hastily, Jungkook immediately following you, grabbing your arm. “Let me go, please.”
“No! I’m not going to let you go!” he snapped. “You can’t just give up on us this easily, Yn. We have one fight, and you’re ready to leave? What the fuck!?”
“I’m sorry; I don’t even think this is a fight! This is you disrespecting me, my freedom, my opinion, and stepping all over my life like it’s yours to control!” you argued, cheeks flushed from overwhelming anger. “I am not your property! You can’t just control things in my life like you’re in charge of it, okay?! I won’t go to Singapore with you. Goodbye.”
As you moved to the door, he stepped in front of you, his body towering over yours. “You didn’t even think about it, Yn. Singapore is a great place; if you transfer to a school there, you’ll still get a very good education. The quality of life is amazing; the house I bought for us is huge. You’ll have enough space for yourself, and there’s even a library, baby; you’ve always wanted a library in your house. I found you a school with an amazing psychology program near our house and my work; you don’t need to think about money at all; I’ll pay for everything. I’ll get you whatever you want, baby; just come with me.”
“Our house??” You asked in disbelief. “Did you just completely lose it? You didn’t ask me if I want to come with you, and you already bought me a ticket and a house?”
It was evident that Jungkook’s patience was wearing thin as he jabbed his cheek with his tongue. “I’m sorry that I want to move forward with our relationship, Yn. I thought we talked about this: we want to get married, get a house together… have kids. What’s suddenly so wrong with that?”
“You’re right; we did talk about these things, but for later and for here! After I graduate, not when you suddenly decide you’re ready, Jungkook,” you explained, your voice a little less harsh than before. “A relationship means working together as a team. It doesn’t mean you get to make life-altering decisions behind my back.”
“So, what does this mean now?” he inquired, his heart pumping with fear.
“I don’t know; I don’t know,” you fidgeted with your hair intensely, eyes shut, clearly unsure of how to proceed. “I just really don’t want to see you right now.”
And that was the last time you saw Jungkook. You didn’t attend the farewell party your brother threw for him, nor did you say goodbye on the day he left. You successfully fought all the urges to reply to his messages or call him back, which led to an empty feeling in your heart.
You were not ready to forgive him.
At one point, you unfollowed him on all social media, muted his number, and refused to look at the pictures and messages he sent you from Singapore; you simply couldn’t.
Deciding to focus solely on college, a little over a year after Jungkook left, you graduated with honors. During the time you learned to navigate life without the love of it, you also learned to be happy within it. You cut off any thread that led you back to the feelings you had for Jungkook.
Eventually, you started living without the aching emptiness in your heart again, yet there was always something missing. You always feared you knew what – or who – it was.
___
You didn’t really know how to describe your current state.
Now 23, you had graduated college, had a steady job, and were in a relationship that was going well. From the outside, it seemed your life was perfect; there was nothing more you could possibly wish for.
You were content with where you were, but there was always something missing. Something indescribable that you subconsciously searched for.
Work was your way of distracting yourself from feeling like that, avoiding confronting your feelings at all costs, which was ironic, considering you studied psychology.
You were working on a report on your day off when Eric, your boyfriend of eight months, called your phone. You couldn’t help but sigh, yet you picked up reluctantly. “Hey.”
“Hi, baby! How is my superstar doing today?” Eric’s cheery voice spoke. “I miss you, and I thought since it’s your day off, we could go get bagels and coffee. I’ll pick you right up!”
Bagels and coffee... you were sick of getting bagels and coffee with Eric. You couldn’t remember the last time he planned something new or exciting for you.
“I’m sorry, Eric, I can’t,” you said in a distant voice. “I’m working on a report, and I have to finish this one... but we could do this another time, right? I mean, there’s always bagels and coffee.”
Eric felt uneasy with the idea that you felt so comfortable not seeing him for weeks and not even checking up on him; he was always the one to call you. If it were up to you, he wouldn’t know where you were half the time.
“Everything okay, babe?” Eric asked. “You want me to come over, cook you something? Give you a massage? Help you with your research?”
‘No, god, no,’ a voice in your subconscious mind said.
“No, it’s fine,” you reassured him, still focusing on the MacBook in front of you instead of your boyfriend. “We’ll just see each other sometime this week, alright? I’ll let you know when I’m free.”
This conversation summed up your relationship with Eric.
He was a sweet, respectful guy who worshipped the ground you walked on, seemingly always a step ahead of you in the relationship. He was already talking about your future together while you were unsure of spending a full weekend with him alone.
It freaked you out. You had only been in one relationship before, but with Jungkook, everything seemed to fall into place: both completely and utterly in love with each other, (almost) always on the same page, never wanting to leave each other’s sides, no subconscious voices in your mind or feelings in your gut telling you something was wrong; just pure excitement and joy.
You told yourself it was you growing up, becoming a ‘real adult,’ but the more you told yourself that, the more you recognized it was a lie.
At least your relationship with Eric gave you one thing you were looking for: peace.
___
Jungkook was back in town after exactly one year and seven months.
It was a small town; people talked and gossiped about everything and everyone, but that’s not how you should have found out about it, given that your brother was the one who picked him up from the airport.
It irritated you that your brother thought you were too fragile to let you know that his best friend, your ex, was coming back to town.
He didn’t know exactly what happened between you and Jungkook; neither of you went into the details of your breakup. He only knew how much love there was between you and that you weren’t willing to talk about Jungkook or hear his name during the initial months after the breakup.
He assumed it was a bad one.
You decided to call him just to see if he would mention anything about Jungkook being back.
“Hey, sis, how’s it going?” your brother answered after a few rings.
“Hi, Zane,” you bit back any snappiness. “I’m doing well. Where are you?”
He hesitated for a few moments, then you heard his footsteps, obviously walking away from whatever scene he was in before. “Just out with some friends…”
You loved how much of a bad liar your brother was.
“Who?” your curiosity was palpable.
“Damn, why do you care so much?”
“I don’t know, Zane; maybe because I heard from some girls at the nail salon that you picked Jungkook up from the airport two days ago,” you said, dumbfounded. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
He sighed into the phone, tsk’ing lightly. “I’m sorry, Yn; I just didn’t know how you were gonna react, you know?”
“Oh my god, I am not a baby! I can handle it,” you declared. “So what if Jungkook is back? What am I gonna do now? It literally changes nothing about my life. You could throw him a party and invite Bella Hadid for all I care.”
Truthfully, Jungkook being back in your orbit did mean something to you. Your first love was back where he belonged after long months without this place seeing him; it almost made you emotional to imagine him back in his childhood home, back in his first apartment after graduation, and back with your brother playing basketball in the yard and…
“Actually, I am,” your brother hesitantly revealed.
“You’re throwing him a party and inviting Bella Hadid??” You only realized how ridiculous that sentence sounded after it came out of your mouth.
“No, just throwing him a welcome back party,” he chuckled a little. “You can come if you want! But only if you want; like, don’t feel pressured to be there. If you don’t come, I’ll totally understand–”
“I’ll be there!” you interrupted your brother’s rambling, who was nervous because he knew what you turned into when you were mad. “And Eric will also be there.”
“Eric?” Confused, he asked, as if he didn’t remember where he heard that name before. “Oh, yeah, your new boyfriend. Yeah, sure, take him with you.”
Even though Zane truly felt it wasn’t a good idea for your current boyfriend and Jungkook to be in the same room, he was inclined to agree with you.
You were going to attend Jungkook’s welcome back party with Eric, and you were going to look absolutely beautiful.
---
After visiting every boutique in New York with your girlfriends to find the perfect dress for your brother’s party, you finally found it and called Eric last minute to inform him that he would be your plus one for this party.
The dress you picked out was a gorgeous red number with a flattering off-the-shoulder cut and delicate lace accents, striking the perfect balance between sexy and classy, accentuating your curvy silhouette; you aimed to impress.
Eric wasn’t aware that Jungkook was your ex; he only knew that the party was for your brother’s best friend who had returned from overseas. He didn’t care whose party it was; he just thanked God that you finally called him and let him see you.
Your girlfriends knew you were indulging in self-destructive behavior by going to a party solely for your ex-boyfriend after not seeing him for almost two years, but they also knew nothing they would say could stop you, and they seemed to think you deserved closure. All of them suspected that you were still hung up on Jungkook, but none dared to speak of it until you decided to, which you hadn’t.
As you arrived at the bar your brother rented, hand in hand with Eric, his friend Marcus was the first to greet you with a big grin, evidently already too drunk for his own good.
“Hey, Marcus, you know where Zane is?” you asked, only to receive a drunkenly slurred ‘nah, but probably in the back somewhere’ as an answer.
While you walked into the place, you couldn’t help but silently praise your brother’s dedication; the venue looked good, nicely decorated with a huge sign that said ‘Welcome Back, Jungkook’ on it.
The crowd was enormous, making you almost trip in your high heels, but thankfully, you caught yourself on Eric’s arm.
“This will be the first time I meet your brother. I can’t wait!” Somehow through the loud noise, Eric still managed to be audible. “It’s about time, you know? I mean, you’ve met my entire family; I was wondering when I’d get to meet yours.”
“Yeah,” you sent a smile that didn’t quite reach your eyes his way and walked forward, until you finally saw a glimpse of Zane, seemingly engaged in an animated conversation. “He’s there!”
With gathered confidence, you gripped Eric’s hand and walked over to Zane; even though your eyes didn’t see him yet, you knew that if Zane was there, Jungkook couldn’t be far.
“Zane!” you called out to grab his attention, but the music was too loud and he was too engaged in the conversation to hear you, so you approached him closer, gripping Eric’s hand like your life depended on it.
When Zane finally saw you, he waved at you, excitedly signaling you to come closer, so you did. But there was no sign of Jungkook yet.
“Yn!!” he shouted, having indulged in some drinks himself. “Hey! Come here; let me get you a drink.”
He didn’t even spare Eric a glance before turning around, but thankfully, you gave him a subtle nod in Eric’s direction, which he immediately picked up. “Hey, man, I’m Zane, Yn’s brother. You must be Eric. How’re you doing?”
Zane gave him a friendly smile and offered him a hand, which Eric immediately shook. He was giddy to say the least, just as he opened his mouth, a deep voice from behind you interrupted him before he could speak. “Ey, Zane, there’s no fucking pizza left! It’s my damn party, and I didn’t even get a piece of pizza!”
Jungkook’s playful voice halted you for an instant. Your back was still turned to him, but as he approached the three of you, he slowly recognized who stood in front of him.
Now, he stood next to your brother, paralyzed for a second before he let his eyes wander down your face, then your entire body; a shimmer of desire and longing that could not be overlooked formed. He studied your familiar body, every curve that was once only his to touch, to explore, and the eyes that looked back at him with an innocence he could not resist.
His attention flickered to Eric for a second before fully turning to you again, with darkened eyes and flared nostrils; you were sure from his expression that Zane told him you were in a relationship now.
Your eyes wandered just the same, spotting new tattoos and much bigger biceps; he looked disgustingly handsome. He was bigger, and his presence seemed even more powerful than before he left. His hair had grown a few inches, but what always stayed the same were his eyes that never stopped looking at you the same way.
There was an awkward silence that even Eric detected before Jungkook spoke up. “Yn… it’s good to see you. You look beautiful, of course.”
There was something deep about the way he said those simple words; it was evident there was a lot more behind them.
And there was so much you wanted to say too, but all you could muster was, “It’s nice to see you too.”
You felt Eric’s and Zane’s gazes swinging from you to Jungkook while you two were lost in each other’s eyes; Eric was confused, trying to figure out what was going on, while Zane was amused yet cautious of what would happen if he left you two to it, with your boyfriend by your side.
“So, I think we should all get something to drink,” Zane was the one to break the silence before patting Jungkook on the shoulder. “C’mon, man; I’ll get you that pizza.”
They moved along, leaving you and Eric alone for a moment.
“So, do you know that Jungkook guy?” Eric carefully asked, not wanting to push you.
“He’s my brother’s best friend; of course I know him,” you answered a little snappily. “And he used to be our neighbor.”
Eric simply nodded, his grip on your shoulder tightening a bit before you slipped out of it, saying, “I’m gonna get a drink too.”
But you actually left to catch a breath of fresh air on the balcony. You felt someone following you, but convinced yourself it was paranoia until you felt the warmth of a larger body lurking behind you. You turned around and saw Jungkook looking at you with an indescribable expression.
“Please tell me that’s your new gay best friend,” he started, now standing next to you, hands on the balcony railing.
“What?” You turned your face to look at him, a sigh escaping your lips.
You were pretending that his presence didn’t affect you, pretending that you were even slightly annoyed he followed you, but you knew you wanted him to and you were glad he did.
“The guy you came with,” he clarified, a waiting gleam in his eyes.
You knew he knew that Eric was your boyfriend; he was just acting oblivious to get you to feel bad and to start a conversation about how Eric wasn’t ‘the right one for you.’ He might have been gone for over a year, but you knew Jungkook. He was predictable to you.
“No... he’s my boyfriend,” you clarified with a huff. “And what’s it to you anyway?”
He put his hand up in defense, a small smirk forming on his pretty face. “Nothing, nothing... just didn’t think he was your type is all.”
Despite not having figured out your feelings for Eric, Jungkook’s words pushed you to defend him.
“What do you mean ‘not my type’? Eric is a sweet guy, the sweetest actually, and any girl would be lucky to be with him,” you asserted, your heart racing. “He is gentle and a good communicator, and he loves me. And he would never do anything behind my back.”
Jungkook’s nostrils slightly flared as you talked about another man; he had always been the possessive one. He noticed how your stance wasn’t firm and the knitted expression on your eyebrows; a sign of uncertainty on your face he knew too well. “He loves you, huh? No doubt about it... do you love him though?”
Your breath hitched, and you felt faint for a second, not knowing how to compose yourself; you didn’t love him, no matter how much you tried. You always found yourself longing for something else... someone else. You didn’t know what to say, so you replied, “He treats me right.”
“I’d hope so...” he started, with an indescribable expression. “At least one person in that ‘relationship’ has to treat you right.”
You knew exactly what he was trying to do: making you overthink your relationship to come to the conclusion you two belonged together. But your half-healed heart refused to bring you to that place.
“What are you trying to accomplish, Jungkook?” you asked, saying his name as if it were venomous. “You left for Singapore almost two years ago; what was I supposed to do? Wait around for you until you remembered you had people who wanted to see you here? People who missed you?”
Now, he wore a spiteful expression, jabbing his cheek with his tongue. “No, you should have picked up my calls, answered my messages, let me know how you were doing. You should have at least let Zane let me know. You blocked me out of your life entirely; we are – we were in love, Yn. That doesn’t just go away overnight.”
You scoffed sarcastically to mask the pressure in your heart, affected by his words. “You think it was easy for me to do that? Guess what, Jungkook! It took a lot longer than ‘overnight’ for me to get over you, and if I had answered your calls and messages, maybe I still wouldn’t be over you!”
At that point, the loud party was a soft background noise for the two of you; you were too indulged in the rising tensions - your raising voices the only thing consuming you. Even during fights, there seemed to be no one else around you - for you.
“I wanted you to come with me! I got you a ticket, remember? The house is designed exactly how you envisioned your dream house,” he started, pain evident in his voice. “Yet, I have to live in it alone while everything reminds me of you.”
Your heart was breaking all over again, the sorrowful reflection in his gaze influencing you more than you wished. Yet, there was a rational part of you that recognized you had to stand your ground, defend yourself. You had good reasons to do what you did.
“Maybe you should have told me that before you bought a ticket for me without consulting me first!” you ranted, reminiscing the shock you felt at finding the tickets. “Or maybe you shouldn’t have taken the job offer and just stayed here like I wanted you to!!”
Jungkook had envisioned multiple scenarios about what would happen when you would see each other again. He thought about it all the time, while he was working, during sleepless nights without you by his side, while showering, working out, or fucking women that meant nothing to him... he knew exactly what you were going to say, if you would be willing to talk to him. And you were, and that made him feel happy despite the arguing because at least you were willing to argue with him, to talk to him.
He knew you, maybe more than anybody else did. He was convinced that the love between you two transcended any boundaries or obstacles.
“I know,” he admitted defeat, his voice velvety. “And I’m so fucking sorry, but please, baby, just give us another chance. I’m staying here for six months straight, and the offer to come with me after still stands.”
You felt conflicted; on one hand, you could not believe his audacity, and on the other, you were satisfied to know that he still wanted you, just like the last time he saw you.
“You can’t be serious!” you snapped. “I’m with Eric, and you can’t just come here and pretend like nothing ever happened.”
Jungkook felt your patience spreading thin and decided to go against his usual instincts to persuade you further. “Alright, I’m sorry. I just need to know one thing.”
“What?”
“Is he fucking you good?” he inquired, a possessive gleam in his eyes.
The question hung in the air like an unanswered prayer for a moment. You stood frozen before him as if you weren’t expecting him to ask that, as if you weren’t sure how to answer it.
And you truly didn’t.
“I don’t know,” came out in a whisper.
The truth was, you hadn’t let Eric that far yet, and you weren’t planning to do it anytime soon. He had an inability to make you wet, and whenever he went any further than touching your waist, you felt a slight sensation of disgust, like you would rather be fighting in a war than let Eric be inside you. You opted for telling him you were celibate, which wasn’t entirely a lie.
“What do you mean you don’t know?” Jungkook was confused, trying to decipher what you were trying to say.
“It means,” you started, slowly regaining your snappiness, “that I don’t know! I’ve never had sex with him.”
It was now Jungkook’s turn to say ‘what?!’ and it suddenly made you very aware that there were crowds of people just inside, Eric being one of them. You were lucky there were so many people blocking the view into the balcony, because if there weren’t, Eric would have found you a long time ago.
Jungkook was evidently happy with the revelation, smiling like an idiot.
“Stop smiling like that!” you hissed, motioning with your hands. “I’m just not ready yet. I told him I’m celibate. It’s none of your business anyway; why am I telling you any of this?”
Jungkook obeyed your wishes and stopped smiling; instead, he burst out laughing, so amused. “So you’ve been dating for eight months, and you still haven’t fucked? Damn, ma... we did it after the first date... and every day after.”
Before you could answer, your brother entered the balcony. When he saw you and Jungkook face to face, deep in a conversation or rather an argument, he gazed between you with an indescribable expression.
“Yn, Eric’s been looking for you everywhere,” Zane informed you with what you called ‘warning eyes’ digging holes into your face as you went back inside, leaving the two best friends alone.
___
The two weeks following the party were filled with work, for you and Jungkook alike. You didn’t run into each other again, but you did decide to unblock him.
You thought it was petty and unnecessary to deny him access to you when you would surely see him during his six-month stay here. You also wanted to see if he would notice and maybe hit you up occasionally; which he did.
Good morning texts and daily ‘how are you’s?’ filled you with an unspoken joy that you felt shouldn’t have been there, but you defended yourself by thinking, ‘I cannot control my feelings.’
Your conversation on the balcony made you think a lot through, specifically your relationship with Eric. You decided it was time to open up to him, giving him a chance to take you out properly, which he had been trying to do for a while.
So, you were getting ready for a romantic night out with Eric, putting on a gorgeous, tiny black dress that accentuated your curves and applying makeup that made you resemble an effortless beauty.
You planned to be honest with him about where you thought the relationship was headed.
---
You met up with Eric at a nice Italian restaurant in the middle of the city.
After a little small talk and finishing your meal, you sat in an awkward silence as he admired you.
You could feel something unusual but brushed it off as your usual paranoia. Eric was always a jolly person who wasn’t afraid to show his love in sometimes very overbearing ways.
“You know, Yn,” he started and suddenly got on one knee. His loving gaze spread pity over your conscience, his position weighing heavily on your chest. “I’ve never felt this way about anybody; you are bright like the stars and beautiful like a flower. I find you in everything around me. You consume my soul, Yn. I... I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Will you marry me?”
He took out a red box and opened it, revealing a small diamond ring. Eric waited a moment for your answer, but you sat frozen; it was too much. With the people around you watching, and Eric’s slowly saddened eyes gauging your reaction, you did not know what to do.
You questioned Eric’s self-awareness more than anything; when had you ever given him the impression that you wanted to marry him? You were sure you had never even given him a reason to think you wanted to be in a relationship with him!
You knew Eric’s lack of self-awareness would present a problem sooner or later, but you just wished it wasn’t in such a public setting, in front of at least twenty people.
Your breath quickened, and your heart tightened. You couldn’t do this anymore.
So, you grabbed your purse, stood up, and left with a hurried, “I’m sorry; I can’t do this,” leaving Eric with a humiliating crowd and a broken heart.
It felt like the right thing to do.
- - -
Once you ran to your car without looking back, you drove away from the scene.
You were so lost in thought that your subconscious acted; you set off in a direction you had not intended to go. You drove in the exact direction of Jungkook's apartment, as if it hadn’t been two years since you were last there, as if you were returning from work and it was your house.
As if your heart, and not your head, had guided you. If you had been thinking clearly at that moment, you would have given yourself a slap and reminded yourself who you were.
But you didn't, because as your grandma used to say, “Love makes a person lose their mind.”
You parked your car next to his luxury car. He still lived in the same apartment where you last fought, where you had countless sleepovers, where you lost your virginity, where you shared secrets, and made love in every corner.
You cursed and loved that apartment at the same time.
With a fog-clouded mind, you entered the complex and took the elevator to the fourth floor. Finally, you knocked on his door, '4B,' a few times before a confused Jungkook opened it.
He stood there in all of his glory, wearing grey sweatpants and an oversized black shirt, looking back at you with a questioning yet yearning gaze. “Yn?”
His voice immediately sent shivers down your spine, and you wanted to live in the eyes that devoured your lightly clothed body. “Can I come in?”
Your voice was smaller and weaker than it had ever been; he could tell there was something wrong but did not ask right away. He simply stepped aside and said, “Of course. Always.”
His eyes ran over the prominent curve of your breasts and your naked legs, begging to be wrapped around his head.
Before he had the chance to ask what was wrong, you threw yourself into his arms and whispered a desperate, “Can you just hold me?” into his ears.
He simply kissed your forehead and carried you to the couch.
You wrapped your exposed thick thighs around his waist and your arms draped around his neck, his hands resting on your hips, holding you as if it were the most natural thing in the world.
You hadn’t felt so safe since he left.
The realization that Jungkook was your safe space suddenly hit you, making you hide your face further in his neck.
He sat on the huge sofa, which led you to sit on his lap, your face still hidden in the hollow of his neck.
His large hand moved from your back to your hip, and you would have loved nothing more than to let yourself melt into his body. You had searched so long for that feeling – the feeling of being back in the arms of the only man you could love.
“What happened?” he asked solicitously, his voice rushing softly in your ears.
You refused to say anything for a few moments, totally unsure of how to explain your situation to him, or if you even wanted to.
Slowly coming out of your hiding place, you looked deep into his eyes; your eyes held a melancholy he noticed immediately. He stroked your goosebump-filled arms and brought his forehead close to yours. The atmosphere was just loving and peaceful.
“Eric proposed to me…” you sighed softly, fingers tangled in his soft black hair.
Jungkook’s eyebrows furrowed. “What?? Did you...” He coughed a bit before continuing, “Did you say yes?”
You sighed even louder. Even though you did not want to discuss it, you knew you had to eventually.
“No,” you answered, trying to maintain eye contact. “I just ran away and drove here.”
It was obvious Jungkook was trying hard to suppress a smile, so he simply wrapped his arms around you comfortingly and gently rocked you back and forth without saying a word.
You were hyper-aware of the fact that the only thing separating your wet pussy from leaving marks on his sweatpants were your thin, almost see-through panties.
You stayed in that position for a while, before leaning in and starting to place wet kisses on his neck, your fingers tightening around his hair.
His breath grew heavier as he held onto the thick flesh of your bare ass, unsure whether to let you go further or stop you.
“Yn...” his tone was uncertain yet aroused. “We really shouldn’t…”
You continued the trail of desperate kisses, unable to resist, with his familiar scent and the feel of his skin against your lips.
You already felt his dick hardening in his boxers as you gently caressed it with your hands, making him groan at the friction.
“Why not?” you asked with a pout, before palming his dick harder while grinding on his thigh. “Don’t you want to fuck me? Do I not make you hard anymore?”
You knew that neither of those things was true; you were just playing dumb to get him to give in to something you wanted, craved desperately. Your body hadn’t been properly touched in nearly two years; you were starting to get needy.
“You’re in a vulnerable state,” he stated in a raspy voice, heavily affected by your behavior. “I don’t want to do something with you that you might regret later.”
You shook your head almost vigorously, gently punching his chest; it was only gentle because your arousal was weakening your body. “No, you don’t get to leave for Singapore for two years and then come back to deny me. If I say I want you, I better get you, okay? I’ve been lonely for almost two years, Kookie; my fingers are starting to cramp from how much I touch myself thinking about it... don’t you dare deny me.”
Despite the urge to chuckle at your approach, your words made him think about you craving him just as much as he craved you; it made him feel validated and less pathetic for thinking about you after all the time and distance.
He was always convinced the love between you two transcended any boundaries or obstacles.
He captured your lips in a passionate kiss, which you reciprocated with whimpers against his familiar lips. There was no way to describe how much you missed this feeling.
Suddenly gripping your hips tighter, he stood up, carrying you to the bedroom like you weighed nothing, your pussy and his clothed dick touching delectably, evoking even more arousal from both of you.
At his bedroom, he gently placed you on the bed, looking down at you with desire-filled eyes. “You sure you want this?”
“Yes!” Your patience was wearing thin. “Just fuck me, Jungkook, and stop talking so much.”
You tugged at his shirt, and he quickly took the hint, stripping it off to reveal well-defined abs and bulging biceps, arms that looked like they could kill someone.
The last time you saw him, he was already muscular and fit, but it was evident that he took his fitness seriously while in Singapore.
You dreamily stared him up and down. “Now, the pants.”
He chuckled at your bossiness but obeyed without hesitation, leaving him in just his boxers.
You were getting impatient, already reaching for your panties to rub your pussy in anticipation, letting out small ‘hmmm’ sounds that drove Jungkook insane.
Now, he was determined to take off your dress, zipping it down hastily and almost ripping it off you if it weren’t for your hands stopping him from ruining a perfectly good dress.
“Baby, you don’t know how much I missed this,” Jungkook breathed out, eyeing you hungrily while you carefully took off your dress.
Once the dress was off, you revealed nothing more than your panties; you decided not to wear a bra because the dress was strapless and it would look silly with one.
Jungkook’s breath hitched, clearly overwhelmed by the sight of your generous breasts. “No bra?”
You shook your head and slowly approached him, roaming your hands all over him and grabbing him by the neck to pull him in for a kiss.
Your chest pressed against his, or more accurately, against his solid stomach because of your height difference; he was acutely aware of your hard nipples.
“Fuck, Yn,” he groaned, his hands roaming your body just the same. “Need to be inside you.”
“Then fuck me,” you urged, tugging at his boxers with hooded eyes and parted lips, desperation and horniness visible. “Just want you to fuck me, Kookie.”
He tilted his head back at your words, muttering a low ‘fuck,’ before positioning himself to enter your pussy. He quickly glanced into your eyes for any uncertainty, and finally, when he didn’t find anything other than an eager, awaiting expression, he entered your tight pussy with a low groan.
Your mouth widened for a second as you tried to adjust to the feel of his dick again, eliciting loud moans of pleasure and slight uneasiness.
He pressed you against the wall for more support, thrusting deeper into you. He watched his dick enter your pussy; it was almost poetic to him how perfectly made for him your pussy felt.
There were no afterthoughts about the situation being wrong, absolutely no overthinking about Eric, who was blowing up your phone while you were getting your back blown by your ex.
It felt right; you and Jungkook knew you were meant to be, and there was nothing that could happen, no one that could come between you. At the end of the day, you were always going to be back in each other’s arms.
“Shit, baby, you’re so fucking wet,” he panted, his lips pressing against your cheeks. “Still so fucking tight for me...”
You let out an aroused purr, already fucked out before even starting. Your hands were gripping his big arms, and your hips were moving towards him, seeking more friction.
“I’ve been dreaming about this moment, baby,” he admitted between low groans, moving in and out skillfully. “You know how many times I fisted my dick thinking about fucking you again?”
“Me too,” you desperately moaned back, bouncing slightly; the sound of slapping skin surrounded the air. “Fuck, Jungkook… love that dick… yes, I fucking love that dick…”
Your barely comprehensible words drove him crazy, gripping your hips and fucking you like you were a fuck toy. “Shit, baby, that pussy’s mine, yeah? Only mine. No one else gets to - fuck - no one else gets to have you like this.”
You nodded, burying your fucked-out face in his broad shoulder, vocalizing the pleasure you felt at every thrust. Your breath tickled his skin, and the warmth of his hands contrasted the coldness of the wall beautifully.
His big dick moved inside of you in a steady rhythm, each thrust making your eyes roll back further.
Your bodies pressed against each other sexually, big breasts spilling out against his strong chest, your hands moving around his back to scratch him harshly, and his grip on your ass and hips becoming almost painful; you were both begging for release.
“Harder, Kookie. Do it harder,” you begged, not caring how desperate you sounded. “That dick feels so fucking good. Oh god, Jungkook.”
He indeed started to fuck you harder, heavy breaths becoming even heavier, lips connecting again and again in sensual kisses. His moans against your lips drove you wild.
The raw intensity of the moment was driving you insane; you felt every inch of his beautiful dick, and he was feeling your pussy entirely, without the almost restrictive feeling of a condom.
“Shit, shit, shit, shit,” he panted with every quickened motion of his dick, his mouth forming an ‘o.’ “Baby, I’m g’na cum. Shit, I’m g’na cum so fucking hard.”
Feeling your high approach as well, you didn’t care about the consequences at all; you planned to go on birth control first thing in the morning, saying, “Cum inside, Jungkook. Please, just fill me up with that cum.”
Your bodies moved together rhythmically, his steady thrusts hitting exactly the right spots as you chased your orgasm. Your eyes locked together and your moans became intertwined.
Low ‘fuck’s and ‘oh god’s were all you heard, as both of you were too deep into the pleasure to formulate real sentences.
With one final thrust and a muttered ‘yes, just like that,’ he found his release, his thick, warm cum deliciously filling you. You closely followed, your back arching and head thrown back, the two of you coming hard.
His broad body momentarily collapsed against yours, both panting hard, still pressed against the wall. He whispered praises and sweet nothings in your ear while trying to regain composure.
“I’m so happy I came here,” you softly kissed him, and he agreed with your words, muttering a ‘me too’ against your lips.
You felt hazy and tired, but you tried to slowly get off Jungkook and get to the bathroom, which you eventually did with his help; he carried you all the way there.
After you finished cleaning yourselves up, you headed straight to the bed. You lay bare on your stomach, still somewhat overstimulated and hazy from the orgasm.
Jungkook gently stroked your backside, muttering things like, “You did so good for me, baby,” and “You don’t know how much I missed this fucking pussy,” before leaning in and biting into your shapely ass playfully, eliciting a gasp from you.
He spread kisses on your ass cheeks and slowly separated them; he stuck his head in between and gave your hole a few licks before gently sucking on the skin of your ass with his skillful tongue.
Your legs started to tremble from pleasure and mild discomfort; Jungkook had eaten you before, but you seldom did that in the bedroom.
The more you thought about it, the more you realized how terrified your brother would be if he knew what you two did.
“Jungkook!” you purred, arching your back for more pressure against his tongue. “Oh fuck… oh my god, oh god.”
Jungkook’s groans and low chuckles sent vibrations through your body, deepening the pleasure and making you seek your high more.
“Fuck, this fat ass is still as good as I remember,” he praised against the sensitive skin, still kneading and spanking it hard. “Wanna stay like this forever.”
He returned to licking and probing your asshole, clearly enjoying your squirming figure. You pushed your ass up, hoping for more friction.
You were practically already fucked out and overwhelmed that you couldn’t answer with more than a simple agreeing moan.
You started grinding your ass against his face, desperately wanting to cum again, enjoying the feel of his tongue against you.
His licks and your grinding quickened, which quickly turned into a series of ‘ah, ah, ah’s as you came undone on his tongue.
When your panting lessened, you turned around, lying on your back in bliss.
You fell asleep in each other’s arms almost immediately.
Jungkook thought this was the nicest way you could have welcomed him back.
___
i hope you enjoy this!! idk if i wanna give this a second part or just leave it like this (cause i have no idea what i would do in the 2nd part actually), but i’m thinking i’ll see if people enjoy it and then think about a part two💋 love uuu
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william-t-sickofyourshit ¡ 2 days ago
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Charlotte chuckled at Sebastian’s comment. “You were quite obvious indeed, not subtle at all.” she snickered. But in all honesty, Charlotte thought this was for the best. Hiding the truth surely was very hard on William, and now there were no more secrets. Even more than that - Sebastian was welcomed to the family, and had Charlotte’s support in this difficult time right now. 
“And tea and dessert sound lovely. If my sweet tooth Teddy likes your desserts, then I’m sure they must be just as good as Bard’s.” Charlotte grinned. She was excited! Little pyjama party with her new grandson-in-law? This was very fun! 
Meanwhile James and William were still downstairs, messing around with Pavarotti. The little birdie even sat on James’ finger, which was very cute! “Oh yes, at first, my cat Dexter was a little too playful and too curious with Pavarotti, but by now he just got used to him. They get along, or at least they tolerate each other.” William chuckled.
But William wanted to show James the photo gallery too, so soon they headed upstairs to join Sebastian and Charlotte. James admired the pictures for a while, before nodding in an appreciative manner. “Seems like you two had a lot of good times… and you look very much in love.” the butler said. It seemed like he was becoming more and more accepting of Sebastian now.
For I have sinned...
The principal cleared his throat, eyes scanning the notes that he had wrote down before this meeting. It already lasted an hour, and the teachers gathered in the faculty room were becoming restless and bored. But indeed there were some things to discuss, with the concert that the senior class was supposed to perform at the end of the semester, and with recent staff changes. 
William glanced down at his watch, sighing softly. His class was starting in 15 minutes, so at least, whether the meeting will be done soon or not, he will get to excuse himself. He looked out of the window, his mind wandering. Principal’s voice turned into white noise in the background. It was a pleasant day, late summer. But William was looking forward to a slightly cooler weather. Wearing all black could really be bothersome at times. 
“And lastly, I am pleased to announce that we have finally found replacement for the violin teacher. Dear Mr Tanaka, may he rest in peace, was with us for so many years that I’ve been concerned we won’t be able to find someone as good as to fill this position.” the principal spoke. “But Mr… Michaelis, was highly recommended to me, and he indeed has impressive references. He will be starting this week, so please welcome him warmly once he will arrive. Ah yes… about that. He will arrive today at noon, I need someone to pick him up from the train station and bring over for the tour around the school. Any volunteers?” 
William was barely listening, and definitely not paying much attention. He glanced at his watch again, and saw that it was time to leave, as his class was about to start. He raised his hand to excuse himself, and little did he know, he just volunteered.
“Father William! Excellent!” the principal exclaimed. “Just don’t be late, the train arrives at noon.”
“Train…?” William questioned, raising his brow. He had a feeling he was missing something…
***
Right after the meeting, William had to run for the class, so he had little time to clarify what exactly he had volunteered for. He was a piano teacher in this Music Academy, but also he served as a priest in local church. Well respected, and rather liked. So when he later found out it was about the new violin teacher, he didn’t refuse. Who, other than himself, would be a better choice to introduce a newcome to their community?
So even though he raised his hand by accident, he accepted this fate.
After classes, at noon, William took a taxi and drove to the train station, to pick up their new teacher. Wearing black trousers, and a black shirt with a thin tie, was absolutely dreadful in this weather, so William quickly found shelter under the roof of the station platform, that provided some shade.
The train had just arrived. William had no idea how Mr Michaelis looked like, but he figured he will just look for someone carrying a violin case with them. 
He was in for a bit surprise.
@crazyvik97
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impsandstars ¡ 1 day ago
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Communication through dance
One of my absolute favorite tropes is when some form of dancing is involved between the main characters.
Moments where one of the main characters has to watch their love interest dance with someone else (looking at you Apology Tour).
Moments where the main characters dance but they are currently on rocky ground, unsure of where they stand with the other person (looking at you Sinsmas).
Dancing is one of those socially acceptable forms of prolonged touch that always create great moments of revelations or moments of connection; newfound potential or reaffirming something that has been there all along.
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The scene of them dancing at the end of Sinsmas is much more than just their verbal exchanges. First and foremost the fact that Blitz asked Stolas to dance at all instead of going back inside (even when Stolas was like it’s okay, I’m good, go enjoy the holiday) says a lot. Blitz cares about him so much, wants him to be happy even though he knows life is a dumpster fire for him right now. And maybe he is also making up for the fact that he didn't get to dance with Stolas at Verosika's party (and saw Stolas react as if he had never been asked before). It's a relatively safe way to show his affection for Stolas without it being taken as too intimate or sexual. Stolas could back down if he wanted to, say no thank you, which allows him to have some agency.
Then we get to the actual dancing. It’s not just swaying back and forth, head on shoulders so they can’t see each others faces. They are moving as if they have done this dance before. Seamlessly changing hands, twirling, steps fluid (Blitz doesn’t even once miss his footing on the thin railing) and staring right into each others eyes.
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They fall back into a routine, semi-flirting, touching and holding each other because they are familiar with the others body and how it moves.
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And the dip! Stolas laughing! His little leg lift!! It was a moment of connection for them, soft, transcending them to a moment where all their worries have been swept aside and they just have each other. A subtle reminder of the way they were before, of the ease with which they work together.
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Then, THEN, we get to the end, breathing slightly elevated, eyes widening and staring at each other lips (this is my favorite moment of any dancing trope, the realization that 'woah now, there is something here; I can’t stop gazing deeply into your eyes'). They both realize at the same moment that that spark between them hasn't fizzled out just yet. The potential for more is still there.
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But Blitz, my beautiful lizard man, knows that he needs to take this slow, that jumping into anything more right now is moving too fast. There is still so much that needs to be figured out and healed. So he ends their dance with a hug. Comfort and love. Ugh these two.
And all of it is done under the warm glow of a full moon. (Or is that the portal to heaven?) Either way it’s implied that they are dancing under the full moon. And of course the lyrics (Sam Haft I see you) "truer love is hard to find".
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ellecdc ¡ 2 days ago
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Matched
Finnick Odair x fem!victor!reader who are constantly introduced to each other [1.2k words]
CW: people trying to introduce Finnick and reader, Capitol behaviours (body modification, eating-purging-eating, no sense of propriety), fluff, a surprise
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You’d come to expect a lot of things to happen when attending a party in the Capitol.
There would be people dressed to varying levels of near insanity. There would be people literally eating until they were sick, then forcing themselves to be sick so that they could continue eating. There would be people approaching you, asking you questions, and running their hands over your clothes or hair or jewelry or body as though having seen the most traumatic moments of your life aired on TV from the safety of their homes made you friends.
And there would always be people trying to introduce you to or set you up with their favourite victor; the Capitol’s darling.
“There you are, darling!” A rather reptilian looking woman you knew to go by Komoda greeted you as she approached; arm aggressively interlocked with another’s who didn’t appear to be all that willing to be there. “There’s someone I’d like to introduce you to.”
You plastered on your show time smile and offered your hand to Capitol Darling Finnick Odair who accepted it readily, bowing his head slightly as he met your gaze.
“Lovely evening, isn’t it?”
“It always is in the Capitol.” You volleyed, smiling back over to the Capitol citizen who seemed very excited to be seeing two of her favourite victors intermingling. “Finnick and I have met a few times, actually.”
Komoda seemed rather bemused at the fact that the two of you had met and not immediately jumped each other's bones. “Oh… oh! Really?”
You hummed in the affirmative.
“Every year when we mentor new tributes.” Finnick explained.
Komoda tried to laugh. “Well, I just think that the two of you would get on rather well.”
“We get on fine.” You continued, feigning ignorance.
“The two of you would make a very handsome couple!” One of her friend’s chimed in, earning him nods of approval from the quickly forming group of spectators.
“Well, looks aren’t everything, are they?” You tried, and a few of the more…altered individuals seemed rather perplexed at the thought. “The two of us might not have anything in common.”
“That’s very true.” Finnick agreed. “Let’s see; how do you feel about the beach?”
“Too much sand; I’m shaking it out of everything I own for far too long afterwards. What’s your favourite pastime?”
“Swimming.” He answered.
“I never learned how.” You continued with pursed lips. “Least favourite season?”
“Winter. What’s your favourite holiday?”
“Christmas.”
Finnick hummed in displeasure before continuing. “Favourite animal?”
“Cats. Yours?”
“Dogs.”
You hummed in displeasure. “How do you feel about white chocolate?”
“Love it.” He replied easily; you scrunched your nose at him before he carried on. “What’s a dealbreaker for you?”
“People who like white chocolate.”
He pressed his lips into a flat line and nodded his head in understanding. “Very fair.”
You looked back over at Komoda and her friends to see them all gaping at the two of you.
“Sorry to disappoint, folks.” Finnick apologized with a shrug of his shoulder. “It’s apparently just not meant to be.”
“But…” Komoda started, looking rather crestfallen. “I…I was so sure!”
“You’re not the first to try to set us up.” You placated, placing a gentle hand over the scale-like jewels on the shoulder of her gown. “You probably won’t be the last, either.”
“Maybe the 29th time will be the charm, hm?” Finnick offered you with a wink, causing you to roll your eyes at him.
“Don’t hold your breath, Odair.”
“I can hold my breath for a very long time, sweetheart; I’m a world class swimmer, afterall.”
“Oh, you’re something alright.” You laughed as you turned to walk away, deciding then to begin your rounds of goodbyes before heading back to your suite.
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You held the towel to your face for a few seconds, just taking a moment to breathe and enjoy the quiet, warmth, and serenity of your post-party ritual.
You were just about to pull the towel away when you felt gentle hands slide around your waist before you were being embraced between two strong arms.
“Long night?” He murmured into your shoulder before pressing a kiss to it.
You hummed in agreement and pulled the towel away from your face, smiling at Finnick in the reflection of the mirror.
“It always is in the Capitol.” You replied.
He offered you a knowing smile before pressing another kiss to your shoulder.
“Missed you.” He said before reaching around you to grab some makeup wipes to begin removing the work his own stylists put into his appearance tonight. “Anything interesting happen?”
You hummed noncommittally as you smoothed cream over your skin. “Not really. Someone tried setting me up with this guy again.”
“Really?” Finnick asked, feigning intrigue. “Was it a match made in heaven?”
You made a so-so sound. “He was pretty cute,” you allowed, “but I don’t know if it would work.”
“No?”
“No. I mean, for one, he didn’t start drooling the second he saw me. Huge red flag I think.”
With that, Finnick theatrically slammed his hand down on the countertop and levelled you with a disbelieving look. “You mean to tell me that he didn’t immediately fall to his knees in worship?”
“No!”
Finnick shook his head; simply aghast. “You can do so much better, honey.”
Your smile turned soft as you watched him lather some of his face wash between his hands before bringing them to his face. “I think so too.”
By the time he was done with washing his face, you were sitting on the counter with Finnick standing between your legs as you massaged some moisturizer into his skin.
“They don’t know what you deserve anyway.” Finnick states suddenly.
Your brows scrunched in confusion. “Who doesn’t?”
“The Capitol people; they don’t know what kind of partner you deserve.”
You stayed quiet as you finished working the product into his skin, pressing a kiss to his lips to alert him to the fact that you were finished. You felt rather shy when he opened his eyes and you found yourself pinned beneath his sea green gaze.
“They’d be sorely mistaken if they thought Capitol Darling Finnick Odair was all you deserved.”
You smiled softly at him before pressing another softer, lingering kiss to his lips.
“I’m rather fond of this Finnick Odair.”
You relished in the slight pink dusting of his cheeks as his smile grew wider before he pulled you in, cradling you to his chest.
You’d come to expect a lot of things to happen when attending a party in the Capitol.
It would take your stylists three hours to prep you for the party. It would take you forty minutes to disassemble yourself after the party. The outfits and jewelry you wore would cost more than most District families saw in years.
And there would always be people trying to introduce you to or set you up with their favourite victor; the Capitol’s darling.
The best part was that no one knew you and Finnick Odair have actually been dating behind closed doors for four years now.
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flower-boi16 ¡ 2 days ago
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Octavia’s reaction is 100% justified, actually
So I already made an entire reblog about this but I feel as if this topic is deserving of being its own post because the fandom’s reaction to Octavia has hit a new low. I’m just gonna paste what I said from this reblog here.
So think of this; young girl living in a home with a close relationship to her father. The father is always there to comfort the young girl and even sang a song when she was little as a lullaby to help her sleep due to having nightmares of her father not being there for her, telling her that no matter what, he’ll never leave and she will always be okay.
Cut to many years later, and, suddenly, things change. The father that the young girl held close to…suddenly cheats on his wife and starts obsessing over a random imp over her, even to the point of making sexual remarks about him around her even when she’s uncomfortable. Everything was turned upside down for her, the parents who previously loved each other now loathe on another, and now the father who held his daughter dear starts neglecting her in favor of this random imp.
Which leads the daughter to grow a fear that her father will leave her in favor of that imp, a perfectly understandable one given that it was established before that she has fears of abandonment. THEN when that father takes the daughter to a carnival that she hated when she was a child, he spends most of the day flirting with that imp on the trip that was SUPPOSED TO CHEER HER UP. The daughter gets fed up with this and runs off where the father follows suit. The daughter expresses her fears of abandonment to her father and asks him if he is really going to leave her in favor of that imp. The father says no, realizing his mistake and assures her that he’ll never leave her and decides to take her to a place she actually enjoys as a way to make up for that…
…and then cut to 17 episodes later where the daughter then witnesses her father THROWING HIS LIFE AWAY ON LIVE TELEVISION FOR AN IMP. He told her that he would never leave her, that he wouldn’t chose that imp over her…and he does that with no hesitation. Without even telling her. Octavia doesn’t know shit about whatever close relationship Blitz and Stolas have, to her, Blitz is just some random nobody imp that Stolas is for some reason horny over.
And this effectively cements to Octavia that, she doesn’t matter to her father. He really would choose an imp over her. Sinmass further drives this home with a heart breaking song Octavia sings that offers as a dark reprise of you will be okay, as Octavia sings about her resentment and heart break over her father betraying her trust, for LYING to her. She says she’ll never be the same now and fully accepts the fact that Stolas cares more about Blitz than her. And she then finds out that Stolas was taking anti-depressant pills, making her believe that she was just nothing but a burden, an obligation to Stolas this whole time.
If she wasn’t, why would he leave her without hesitation? It’s infuriating to me how the one time the show has good writting the fandom STILL makes insane arguments trying to defend Stolas.
Is Stolas allowed to form other relationships outside of Octavia? Yea, he is, but that’s not the issue. The issue is that Stolas was placing those new relationships above his old ones, he chose Blitz over Octavia, his daughter, his FAMILY.
”probably called her a million times” actually we saw him call once and Octavia was happy to answer until Stella wouldn’t let her, taking Octavia’s phone and mocking Stolas for trying to call her. Octavia doesn’t see the whole picture because SHE DOESNT HAVE THE WHOLE PICTURE! Stolas never communicated ANYTHING to her, not about what was going on between him and Stella, and not about his relationship with Blitz. Stolas didn’t give Octavia ANY information about what was going on and guess what? Seeing Stars and Sinmass show the exact consequences of that.
In Seeing Stars Octavia runs away to try and see the stars for herself because Stolas was focusing more on arguing with Stella than her, which leads Octavia to thinking that Stolas hates Stella more than he loves her, and she wouldn’t have started believing that IF STOLAS COMMUNICATED AND TOLD HER ABOUT THE ABUSE DURING OF THEIR MARRIAGE. Therefore she would be more understanding.
And in Sinmas, If Stolas ever explained to Octavia at any point in the show the full context of his relationship with Blitz, that would, at the very least, make Octavia understand his decision. Yet he never did. Octavia doesn’t have the full context for ANY of these situations because Stolas for SOME REASON never communicated to her.
And can people just fuck off with the whole “omg Octavia is such an immature/selfish teenager!” BECAUSE SHES NOT!! She’s not being a bratty, emotional teen for *checks notes* wanting attention from her father. Sinsmas is legitimately one of the best episodes of season 2 because it actually addresses Stolas acts as a father and calls him out for it, creating drama that doesn’t feel artificial for once and ends up being a step in the right direction for both Stolas AND Octavia as characters. But it’s sad to me that some people still miss blatantly obvious details like this.
Octavia is not a bratty teenager having a tantrum, she’s a girl that had her life turned upside down and is suffering through a divorce. I wish most of the fandom would actually see that.
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fallenclan ¡ 1 day ago
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wow! it feels weird for this moon (and ravenstar's leadership/arc to finally be over)... i have some Thoughts, particularly about the exiled trio!
patchback -- i like that, of the three, she's the only one who looks genuinely angry. the same is true when ravenstar is killed. levi and sleepydawn look more surprised in that instance as well. given her history, this is the SECOND time patchback has been exiled. i imagine that she enjoys being a part of a clan. possibly, being exiled for the first time was the worst thing that ever happened to her, so when cherrystar gave her a chance, patchback chose to try and "adapt," to be whoever cherrystar would accept. but then ravenstar gave her the room to be herself... surely, with his support, and levi as deputy, then patchback will never have to fear exile again? ha! wrong.
levi -- levi only joined fallenclan after realizing an opportunity to hold power awaited him. i highly doubt levi cares about clan life. i think he's disappointed/annoyed, but not particularly "devestated" in the way that i imagine patchback is. levi will just... move on with his life, and try to find power somewhere else. i think he and patchback will stick together, since they're friends, and there's power in numbers. i believe levi likes power, but doesn't like to be the one making decisions (he likes his second-in-command spot imo). so, with ravenstar gone, patchback becomes his first-in-command. better yet, i imagine levi enjoyed ravenstar, but didn't like him. levi actually likes patchback, so being her second-in-command, backing her up, or better yet, being her partner is especially appealing.
sleepydawn -- he just looks numb. after ravenstar's death, i imagine he quickly resigned himself to what his fate would be. it's also noteworthy that his mate, ashblink, won't be joining him. ashblink could easily have chosen to leave with sleepydawn, but didn't. their relationship felt very shallow from the beginning. while i do think they care about each other, i think sleepydawn's loyalty to ravenstar would always come over his affection for ashblink, and ashblink would ultimately realize that sleepydawn isn't looking for love. within their interactions, ashblink is shown being caring/supportive (as best he can) towards sleepydawn, who looks bored/disinterested or rebuffs him. sleepydawn doesn't know how to be in a relationship. he needs to sort his own shit out before having a boyfriend. i think there's a 50/50 chance that sleepydawn will set out on his own, and try to "find himself" while also seething in bitterness and grief, versus deciding to throw in his lot with patchback and levi.
silly idea: patchback starts her own clan (ravenclan? after the first cat to ever """accept""" her for who she is) with levi as deputy. sleepydawn joins. teeheehee. it would be funny, but in all likelihood, i think the three of them will just have to face reality and Cope rather than getting any sort of resolution they would have hoped for.
anyway, yay wolfstar!!! yay kestrelfeather! yay pondshine and flamefall and cloudtuft!! yippee!! i love how happy wolfstar looks for once, and i was delighted to see broccoli and pepperswipe <3 i know sweetclover is so proud... but also trying to be there for her parents
also finchbeak kits next moon! is the father chumtail or flamefall? or a mysterious, third cat... comment down below! /j
-🐉
MY GOD dragon once again you have hit the nail perfectly on the head... i don't even need to make an explanation post you got it in one. incredible
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seosracha ¡ 1 day ago
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⸝ SAINT MATTHEW'S ACADEMY II (preview)
- "i haven't quite moved on from who you were before"
SYNOPSIS ⸝ heeseung at the start thought he wouldn't mind if you forgot him. but now with his best friend fighting for that sacred position in your heart, he can't help but try to make you remember.
PAIRING ⸝ lee heeseung x fem!reader x park sunghoon
GENRE ⸝ love triangle, exes to ??, friends to ??, private school au, angst, smut, fluff
TAGS ⸝ tba.
EST. WC ⸝ 20-25k
PREVIEW BELOW CUT ->
No more words, you said no more words after his confession. You stayed silent, and that pain flooded you today. The silence stayed with you.
Every night you’d spend on a phone call with him, laughing because no matter how hard you begged him he wouldn’t hang up first, was now filled with the darkness and tranquility of your room, the only sound being the cars that sped past your window or occasionally drunk people who’d loudly call out to taxi’s.
A tall figure towered over you, casting a dark shadow on your papers. An intense scent radiated off of them and you knew exactly who it was.
“Did Sunghoon come to school today?” Jay asked, just like he has every single day.
There was also Sunghoon. Another person you hadn't spoken to. Another person that just disappeared.
His presence in the situation felt so foggy, confusing. Your growing feelings for the boy also confused you.
Did Heeseung tell him to kiss you like that, touch you in those places?
You tried calling him, once, then twice and you’d call again a third time just in case the other two didn't go through. But he didn’t answer anymore. You didn't know if you wanted to speak to him so badly to find out what happened before the party or because you missed him.
Maybe it was both.
Jay chose to stick by Sunghoon almost immediately, which was appaling considering he knew Heeseung much longer. He claimed that Sunghoon just gave into his manly desires and Heeseung is wrong for punching him over nothing. ‘I’d do the same to her if I were him’- Jake forwarded a couple weeks back.
You were no longer mad at Jay, you’d no longer get annoyed at his snarky, degrading remarks. You just accepted the fact that he’ll never get better.
“No, he didn’t” you replied, turning around to face him “Just like he didn’t yesterday, and the day before that, and the day before that one too” you added, a sarcastic smile on your face.
He dyed his hair, the blond locks no longer complimenting his sharp features. He looked much softer with the brown dye.
He sighed “Can I sit?” Jay eyed the seat next to you, and you looked at him amused.
“You want to sit next to a woman? Won’t my female aura disturb your studying?” you scoffed, a hint of sarcasm in your tone.
He rolled his eyes “Very funny” he looked over to Jake who has finally caught a whiff of him “Jakey, what you say?” he tilted his head.
The relationship between them used to be strong, but that’s probably because Jake pretended to be someone different, someone much ‘cooler’. Cooler as in a lame pig who liked to shove alcohol down innocent girls throats.
Oh you’d never let him forget that.
“Do whatever you want, I don’t care honestly” he replied, avoiding eye contact with him.
That’s how it was most day’s at school. Jake and Jay pretended to hate each other, not care, even though deep down, they still had so much left to say. Jay would come down to the study hall with an excuse of looking for Sunghoon, just so he wouldn’t be lonely.
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ishtar7677 ¡ 3 days ago
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This was a Christmas gift to me and my husband from our GM of our very first characters that we ever TTRPG'ed (Pathfinder) who commissioned this from @cutetanuki-chan. (The picture is from me taking a picture and cropping at a weird angle - the whole thing in its frame is stunning.) These two characters (Chrissy and Odhran) met when our game night people were like... hey let's try pathfinder. So I made a character and so did my husband and after meeting them, I was like... oh god... we are gonna get divorced. Lol. We were struggling at the time. And we made these characters and god, they hated each other so much..... but eventually found their way to being friends. But they were our first characters EVER. The next character my husband rolled up in this campaign (we needed to double up to round out a playable campaign), my rogue eventually formed a romantic attachment with. Then I made a bard for a totally separate campaign, and now we're both determined that he meet Chrissy at some point b/c within MINUTES of meeting my bard in a totally unrelated campaign, we were like, okay he's soulmates with Chrissy! But that's the magic right? Finding the parts of ourselves unexpectedly that can be completely accepting of other parts of our partner... even the parts of them that we thought we didn't like, want to be around, or understand to begin with. (CAUTION WARNING: let the reader understand, do NOT use this story to excuse abuse or bad behavior to try to fix a partner! This is an exercise that can ONLY be done with a feeling of absolute safety and trust between partners. We were not there when we started TTRPGS but got to a better place of trust due to his own personal work with therapy. But there were MASSIVE strides before I even trusted it. ) We joked tonight after our friend gave us this picture that Odhran (my rogue) saw this picture and was like oh GOD, what hell-fan of Chrissy (actress) did this? Why do I look like I'm worshipping her? GAHHH nOoOo. But....Odhran can also shut all the way up. :) What ultimately makes me as the player love this picture so much is probably the underpinnings of a romanticism depiction. These two characters, while they never and will never fall in love, in a meta sense, they were the gateway for us into several characters who did help us rediscover love again after years in a very difficult marriage, find a adhd hack into new relationship energy through RPing, and just provide us an outlet for a lot of intense emotional energy. And this artist, despite knowing NONE of this, captured its essence in a two completely non-romantic character portrait. @cutetanuki-chan you knew none of this and still managed to capture it perfectly. This picture will hang proudly in our house and I will enjoy explaining it to anyone who walks through our doors. Your depiction of HERO FORGE characters being so accurate is stupid impressive. Also shout out to our GM, Grace, who actively sought this out for us. What a perfect present. We couldn't ask for a better GM or a better friend. You're family and we love you so much.
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tiger333k ¡ 2 days ago
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there are a lot of people complaining about Arcane season 2, and yes, I get it, it is a bit rushed at times and it would do well if they did a little extra explaining on some parts but honestly it feels like people are just nitpicking sometimes
example: just saw a video about someone complaining about ep7 about Powder and Ekko getting together, and just, wtf??? yes, I know it's because of Ekko's tip that vi died and I know the characters should've it weird when Ekko woke up and just started pointing about things in the past that they really don't want to be reminded of... but if you found this a problem you really didn't watch the show. the main theme about this alternate universe is forgiveness, powder forgave Ekko (though tbh, it was really Vi's plan to go rob someone the whole time), vander and silco forgave each other etc etc. alt Ekko was slaving away at this project when Ekko (firelight) got thrust into his body. powder said it herself, genius and insanity go hand in hand, Ekko saying random things like this probably wasn't even a surprise. also saw a thumbnail where Ekko and powder were kissing and they put 'cheating' beside the image. hopefully I won't have to explain how stupid this is.
Ekko didnt just kiss powder and go 'I can fix jinx'. he doesn't want to change jinx into powder, he even admits that jinx has something good that powder doesn't, jinx's ideas can change the world. what Ekko learned from the alt universe and powder is forgiveness, to look at the past and move forward, leaving a few things behind, leaving behind hate, anger, for the present, for the future. he learned to forgive jinx, so they could build something new.
also adding the fact that it wasn't vi's death that changed everything, it was the act of a child, the fact that someone had been killed that points out how dangerous hextech is, and that's why it was never developed.
personal opinion here, I don't think it was just the death and the letter that changed everything, I think it was little details leading up to the moment silco forgave vander, the moment everything went right. it wasn't one spontaneous event that changed it. we don't know what happened in the alt universe, we don't know if the fight went differently, or if slico had done anything different... maybe he never developed shimmer, maybe he wasn't so set on revenge. we don't know, so maybe don't jump to conclusions so quickly?
another point: jinx didn't just magically lose her trauma because of Isha, dunno what you guys were thinking.
jinx in season one had obvious mental issues, and we always see her drowning out the noise with blaring music. the reason why she was like that was because of her internal conflict, of powder and jinx clashing. jinx was trying to forget the past, and powder was the one that kept remembering it. powder was the one that kept trying to insist it wasn't her fault. powder was the one that held on to everything, and jinx hated powder. and in S1E9 we see her let powder die.
she accepts that she is a jinx to people she loves. the voices stop calling her a jinx, because she already knows this. she accepts this. jinx ruin everything. jinx is a curse. it isn't a case where some kid comes in and changes everything, jinx isn't healed in season 2, she just accepts that she is a catastrophe.
the only thing Isha changes is that jinx learns to love powder through Isha, and maybe even lets a bit of powder come back through. and that's why, when Isha is thrown into Stillwater, the voices come back before jinx takes control again.
three: Caitlyn was done dirty, her entire character was ooc
no it was not. you just saw it through a different lens and decided you didn't like it.
like it or not, Cait has always been privileged. she goes where she wants, does what she likes because she has the kirramman family name to protect her. Marcus says it himself in S1, we just chose to ignore it because that's when cait was doing what we thought was right, investigating and helping Vi, although she was not an enforcer, had no right to be there, we liked it because, well, because we hate Marcus, and she was actually doing something right back then
till season 2, where she gasses Zaun, goes all hitler, and... acts exactly how she acted in S1. she does what she wants, goes where she likes, to achieve one thing: get revenge on jinx.
cait has never lost a parent, she has never learned to cope with such a loss, so she reacts in a wrong way, reacts so drastically that we feel is out of character, its not. we merely see her previous traits painted in a different light and y'all decided you hate it.
I could go on forever honestly, but these three points got on my nerves the most, so I decided to say something about it. there.
this is way too long, my god.
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bossuary ¡ 2 days ago
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Neve is painless. Rook is real.
Lucanis likes Neve because she represents what he is desperate to regain. He wants to feel normal, to work and cook and focus on the things he used to enjoy (such as they were) before the Ossuary. He wants capital R Romance, right out of a book.
Most importantly, he wants to get rid of Spite. He wants to pretend that he is the man he was...not this abomination.
Without truly knowing her, Lucanis believes Neve is a pathway to all of that. He's attracted to her, and she to him. Their flirting has an edge, but it's also friendly. She dislikes Spite, and her presence makes Spite disappear.
Neve will tell Lucanis that he's still himself, and that Spite doesn't change that. She will never be the one to reconcile Lucanis with Spite, to get them to accept each other. So, yeah, he gravitates to the charming, flirty, warm person who (through no fault of her own, really) feeds his desire to pretend he's not an abomination.
Even early on, I think he's smart enough to know that accepting Spite is his only option, but he...just... can't. With what tools? Nothing in his life has prepared him to deal with this. Rook does that. When denial tears Lucanis apart, Rook puts him back together with acceptance. Rook accepts the reality of Spite, and deals with it head-on every time.
Neve will remind Lucanis that she's not going anywhere. She'll tell him to open his eyes and look at facts, but she (probably) won't be the one to push him out of his own prison. Lucanis knows this, so Spite knows this, and therefore Spite will not look to Neve for help.
It's important for Lucanis to accept that Spite has changed him. But when it's Rook who says it--for whom Lucanis has developed real feelings, not idealized ones--well, it destroys the fantasy Lucanis clings to so vehemently, the one where he isn't this.
For me, the Lucanis/Rook romance feels the way it does NOT because the writers "preferred" that Lucanis and Neve get together, but because Neve is simply easier for Lucanis to accept. She's easier to talk to, unchallenging. Easy isn't bad! Comfort isn't bad! God knows they both deserve some comfort.
Loving Rook is a profoundly complex choice. There's not a lot of cute ways to work that profundity into sexy banter. It makes sense, then, that Lucanis doesn't have as much dialogue for a romanced Rook as he does with Neve. What he can do is cook, make small gestures. He can, heartbreakingly, tell Rook, over and over, that he doesn't have the words to express how he feels. That's such an awful state, knowing that the person you care about needs to hear words you simply cannot locate. As soon as he does have the words, he shares them.
Rook is real. And real is not easy.
To Lucanis, Rook represents a difficult path to recovery, a path he has to keep choosing to follow, every day. At a time in his life where he is incapable of seeing Spite (and his own PTSD ) as anything but a 'distraction' to shove aside, Rook shows genuine interest in helping Lucanis heal. Rook takes consistent action toward that goal, particularly when it's clear that Lucanis doesn't know how.
Lucanis also has to believe that he's worth the effort, his own and his love's. Neve is great, love her, but I don't see this struggling cynic, this chronic worrier, being very helpful in the self-worth department. No, people in a relationship do not have to perform therapeutic roles. But, partners do have to respect each others' boundaries and needs.
Of course Lucanis goes all-in for Neve, romantically, even while he and Rook are dancing around each other. Accepting how much he loves and cares for Rook means looking at himself the way Rook does. That is so much harder than whatever will happen with Neve.
The fact that Lucanis isn't afraid to pursue Neve, even if Treviso is blighted, tells me that Neve is an indulgence for him. Again, that's not a value judgement. If they treat each other with respect, then the merits of the relationship don't have to fall on whether Lucanis 'heals' as a result. Sometimes not hurting all the time is enough.
BUT. Contrast the ease he feels with Neve with his feelings about Rook:
"When I was afraid to want you..."
That is a powerful admission.
What was he afraid of? The annihilation of neglect, worthlessness, and shame. The awful but knowable pillars of his existence.
Wanting Rook means that Lucanis wants to dismantle everything he knows in pursuit of something he doesn't. To love Rook is to love and accept himself, exactly as he is.
Then...then...Lucanis finds real comfort.
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mqrrstarr ¡ 2 days ago
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Hi!! ‘Tis the season! Can I request how Geta and Caracalla (separate please) celebrates Christmas (or really Saturnalia) with you? Any gifts of special moments they’d strive to create? I know they throw one hell of anChristmas party- Tysm !!
A/N: YIPPIE! MY FIRST REQUEST THANK YOU DEAR PERSON!! I’m going to write for my glorious emperor Caracalla bc he’s my precious angel and he’s such a cutie in my eyes who deserves all the love he can get. Will post a Geta version after!! - xoxo mqrrstarr
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Christmas With The Emperor (1/2)
Emperor Caracalla x GN! Reader
how Caracalla would celebrate the holidays (Saturnalia / Christmas) with you!
Warnings: not edited, and it’s like half headcanons and half story, also I wrote about it Saturnalia first and then Christmas!!
GO READ GETA’S VERSION!!
。゚•┈꒰ა ♡ ໒꒱┈• 。゚
Caracalla enjoyed spending time with you.
His cherished partner, the one who vowed to love forever. The holidays had come around in Rome, and Saturnalia was all the rage. Outside the palace and in the streets were lines of vendors, performers, and even cooks who were eager to feed the public. Caracalla always took comfort in this period of celebration, and as a devotee to Saturn.
“Darling, are you ready to leave yet? I don’t want to miss any of the activities!”
The man was giddy with excitement, and eager to see you in newly made red, purple and golden clothes, the traditional Saturnalia colors. You nodded and the both of you took off in Caracalla’s chariot with two guards along.
The wheels on the dirt roads guided you to where the main festivities took place, the sacrifices of young pigs to Saturn. Caracalla took your hand as you were his, and smiled as the public bowed down to the both of you.
“See? They bow to the most elite of Rome.”
He kissed you before providing his own sacrifice, a young pig provided by Geta. (Caracalla couldn’t bear the thought of killing his own pig, so hence Geta supplied it.)
Soon after, you left to go to the markets. You noticed how happy Caracalla was, his pale cheeks all rosy and his smile as giddy as a child in a candy store. It was good for him to feel this way. Signs of respect and gifts were thrown your way, and Caracalla eagerly accepted each and every one. You hesitated a little bit, as you did want to financially compensate the merchants.
“I suppose I must, Lord Saturn might ruin the Empire’s farming and harvest. Thank you for telling me.”
He’d give sacks of money to his guards to give the merchants, as he’d want to get home. Caracalla had spent time running around in the road and then wanted nothing but to eat and spend time with you.
“Darling. This was fun. Didn’t I tell you?”
He smiled.
“I’m eternally grateful to the Gods that they gifted me you, and that I live to witness our rule and life until the day it is over.”
He’s absolutely adorable and falls asleep in your arms. A few days later, it’s time for Christmas. The whole month of December was been exhausting. You’ve been busy helping Macrinus choose new gladiators, been meeting with the senate and Geta to figure out tax issues, and studying. On the other hand, Caracalla’s just been doing whatever Caracalla does.
Yet, Caracalla takes the time behind your back to get you the most lavish gifts ever. New robes, a shiny new pair of sandals, golden jewelry, and most importantly; himself.
You’d wake up after him, (which is surprising, as he usually wakes up after you) and he’d been sitting with the gifts under his tree.
(help I don’t think this is time period accurate but whatever)
“Surprise!! All the luxuries you wanted are here! Merry Christmas!”
He’d grab your hand and twirl you around, dancing in the room and kissing.
“I couldn’t ever imagine life without you.”
He paused for a second, clearly trying not to burst into tears. You caressed his face, as he looks up at you in this state and says,
“I love you. I know I am not worthy of your affection, yet you still give it. I thank you.”
You smile and reassure him that isn’t true. You take this chance to pull out your own secret gift for Caracalla and gift it to him. It’s a copy of his favorite childhood book, and a necklace made of both of your favorite gemstones.
This makes him burst into tears, and all you can do is hug him and cherish the moment between the both of you.
(GOD PLEASE HES SUCH A CUTIE 😭)
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heartmix ¡ 1 day ago
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baby please come home - CS55
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Pairing: Carlos Sainz x fem!reader
Word Count: 1k+
Warning: bit angsty with happy ending of course, sad carlos
Twelve Fics Of Christmas - Christmas (baby please come home)
A/N: based on Christmas (baby please come home) by various artist but my favorite is Micheal Buble, Mariah is a very close second!
F1 Masterlist / Masterlist
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The difficult thing about dating an athlete was that he was gone half of the year, what made the relationship more challenging was that you were gone when it was his turn to be home. At first, he didn't mind because that meant you could come with him to a handful of races. He loved showing his job off and more importantly, he loved showing you off. 
In times like this, he wishes he could trade it all. It was Christmas and he was missing you. Christmas was meant to be spent with loved ones, not having them in another country. For weeks you've been away on business, the busiest year for your job. This was the slowest season for his job. Offseason was meant to be spending time with you, but he forgot this is the season you made your money.
He couldn't help but be jealous of his sisters. Each one of them brings their other half home and shows them off to the family, the first time all Sainz siblings were in a relationship at the same time. He wanted to do that with you, he needed to do that with you. It was hard to enjoy the festive activities that his parents had planned, how could he enjoy the most joyful time of year without you here?
'I'm about to go m.i.a for a while but I wanted to be the first to tell you Merry Christmas. I love you!'
That text alone could have had him breaking down. He was envious of everyone who got to kiss their other half Merry Christmas. He wanted to text you to quit your job and that he was going to provide for you, but knew that you would never accept that. So instead he settled for an
'I miss you, Merry Christmas my love' 
It was now nearing midnight and everyone was hanging around watching A Christmas Carol waiting for midnight to strike when everyone would open their presents. Carlos couldn't even get into the movie, his mind was trailing back to you. He was sitting on the single-seater armchair scrolling through pictures of you and him through the year. Might as well call him the scrooge for not wanting to celebrate Christmas. 
"Carlos honey?" A voice pulled him from his thoughts. He looked over at his mom who was calling him.
"Sorry ma. What did you say?" Quickly he tucked his phone away but not before looking at you on his lock screen. 
"It's midnight, Merry Christmas." She smiled sadly at the boy. She and the rest of the family knew he was down in the dumps. He tried to get into the spirit, he really did, but missing you consumed him. 
"Merry Christmas Ma." He smiled back at her before wishing everyone else a Merry Christmas. 
"Let's open presents, shall we?"
Each sibling and their other half sat around as their parents started sorting the gifts. At this, he couldn't help but see the one you left for everyone being passed around. He remembers you giving him clear instructions to make sure it traveled safely in the suitcase. 
One by one everyone opened their presents, which was a lot considering they were all adults at this point. Most were from him because he tended to go all out for his family like he remembers his parents doing for them. When it got to the last round of presents Blanca immediately stood up surprising everyone at the action.
"I left your present in my suitcase Carlos, I'll be right back." She said with a smirk before rushing out of the living room. He gave a confused look to his mom who only shrugged at her daughters out burst. 
It wasn't a moment later that she poked her head into the doorway making him even more suspicious. "Close your eyes, I couldn't exactly wrap it."
"Blanca..." He warned not liking her intentions. After making fun of her for years he wouldn't put it past her for pulling a prank at Christmas. 
"Just do it." She begged making him give in. The faster he followed her order the faster this night would be over.
Once she was satisfied with him, giving him a middle finger just for reassurance, she giggled before pulling his gift into the room. Carlos was ready for anything, mainly for something to be thrown at his head. Knowing his dad, he would let it happen. What he wasn't ready for was for weight on his lap. He swore it was you. He knew what you weighed to a tee from all the times having you in his lap. Opening his eyes he saw you with a smile as you wrapped your arms around his neck. He couldn't believe it it was really you. 
"Amor?" He asked barely above a whisper, he needed you to say something to make it real. 
"Hi baby." You matched his tone.
Before you knew it he picked you up spinning you around in a death grip of a hug. He still couldn't believe you were he, he needed to squeeze you and hear that pretty giggles that emerged from your lips. Soon enough he heard it. It was real, you were here with him on Christmas.
"Baby! You're going to break something!" You shrieked as he still spun you around. 
"You're here! You're actually here!" He chanted over and over. He couldn't help it. 
Seeing as you were getting dizzy, he stopped his movements but still kept you in his arms, making sure you still had your legs wrapped around him. He didn't care if he was in the middle of the room in front of the Christmas tree with his family staring at him. As far as he was concerned, the only people in the room were you and him.
"How?" he breathed out once he got a good look at you. 
"Finished early and I took the next flight home. I knew you were pouty without me." You smirked as you ran yours hands through his hair. 
"Looks like my wish came true." He mumbled out before smashing his lips against you.    
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sleepyparalysisdmon ¡ 1 day ago
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SVT as your older brother
Requested? Yes!
Request: ‘hi!!! :D saw the svt as your platonic bestie and i was wondering if you could do something about svt members as your older brother. tysm, love your work and blog 💘💘💘’
Worse than your parents - Seungcheol, Mingyu, Chan
Your parents had to override him when he said you couldn’t date. He’s the scary big brother that chases off all of the boys that might ask you out. Won’t think twice about getting into a fistfight for you if someone, especially a boy, hurts your feelings. He insists that you share your location with him, especially if you’re going out. You’ll get regular reminders that you’re breaking curfew - it doesn’t matter how old you are, he wants to keep enforcing a curfew. Could be ignoring everyone else, but will always pick up the phone for you just in case you need him. 
Your best friend - Joshua, Hoshi, DK, Vernon 
Same brain cell vibes. There’s the phrase that your siblings are like your first friends, and he definitely considers you that. When he gets good news, you’re the first person he calls. If he gets bad news, he’s just showing up wherever you are to vent. And he wants you to do all of that too because he wants to be your best friend too. Don’t get me wrong. There will be moments that he’ll shove you away and go, ‘Ugh, I hate you, you’re gross,’ but it’s all in jest. There is designated sibling time during the holidays or on vacation that your parents will just have to accept. But naturally, it’s every parent’s dream to have kids support each other the way you guys do. 
Your worst enemy - Jeonghan, Woozi, Seungkwan
Will pretend like you are the bane of his existence. I’m talking the typical sibling energy of ‘ugh, why are you following me,’ complete with a ‘keep out y/n’ sign on his bedroom door as a moody teenager. Has no hesitation about starting a fight with you over something stupid in which one of you ends up in a headlock. He’s accidentally taught you to fight. Oh god, the bickering almost drove your parents crazy. But don’t let it fool you. He’s the only one that can give you a hard time, and he’ll fight anyone that tries to. You’ll mention that that guy who was teasing you in class won’t even look in your direction anymore, and he’ll just go, ‘Huh, that’s weird,’ like he didn’t threaten him within an inch of his life last week. 
Your biggest confidant - Jun, Wonwoo, Minghao
I think they all would make sure you know that you can come to them, but ultimately, they’ll take a step back and let you try to figure things out on your own. He doesn’t let you struggle for long with things, of course. He’ll only let you face a bully a couple of times, quietly encouraging you to speak up for yourself before he steps in to handle it for you. He’ll bite his tongue about a guy that you’re dating that he doesn’t really like as long as you’re happy, but he can be pretty menacing if you get your feelings hurt. He’ll let you scrape by with a couple of bad grades on assignments before he sits down with you to tutor you on the subject. But if you straight up ask him for help, he’ll drop everything. 
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minniebbang ¡ 2 days ago
Text
Always & forever | H. Jisung
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pairing: Jisung x fem!reader
summary: silence in the air, it was odd. Something changed, he changed. Or maybe it was her who changed. Maybe, it was something else.
word counts: 1k words
genre: angst
a/n: I seriously think that physics is the main cause why I write so many angst stories. Never thought physics had that effect on me>>>. Also let me know what you think!
Shutting his eyes, his head remained on the headrest while a low but audible sigh escaped him. His hands had fallen from the steering wheel, finding comfort by his side as the wind from the air conditioner played with his hair. His heart heaved at the thought of starting the car and heading to the place — the one he knew by heart now.
The car suddenly sank, followed by a soft thud from the passenger’s door, but he remained still as a doll. His breath was stolen momentarily upon the sound.
No…he must have misheard it.
He unfolded his eyes and slowly turned his head to the side, his gaze clouded with a vague feeling, a feeling that she couldn't quite point. Feelings that rarely painted on his usually soft features.
She closed the door and beamed a small smile toward him — a smile oh so warm that could light up his days, once a beacon in his unknown path.
“Are you okay, Jisung?” Her hand reached for his hand and gently grasped it.
But her hands felt cold. Hollow of warmth.
A sharp pain struck his head and his hand jolted back, dropping out of her grip. His hands began quivering as they found their place on the steering wheel, gripping them tightly. Everything around him closed up, emerging into each other, creating distorted images. His chest raised in alarming rhythm as he tried to calm himself and gained control over his breathing again and she only could…watch.
Nothing else.
Stuck in the seat without any way to comfort her broken lover.
The sound of his phone pulled him back to reality. Picking it up, he hastily slid the green icon to the side and placed it to his ear.
“Hyung…” his voice echoed in her ear, a tone nearing breaking down, but he held on as long as he could. As long as the latter won't worry about him.
“Jisung, are you sure you're fine to go there?”
“Today is our anniversary, hyung. She will be happy to see me there”
The latter sighed “Alright, be careful. If anything, I’m here. ”
“I appreciate it, hyung”
He placed his phone back into his pocket and glanced at her once more before pulling the break, feet lightly stepping into the gear and leaving the house.
“Jisung..?” Her words hung in the thickening silent air.
No reply or bubbly humming, like he usually did.
He was an arm's length away from her.
But it felt like a concrete wall had built itself between them.
He was unreachable.
Her eyes searched for any remaining love in his orbs, but she found none. As if the person beside her was a stranger.
The radio was playing silently in the background. She raised the volume, and immediately, her eyes widened, looking at Jisung with excitement as the familiar beat bounced in the car.
“Hey, it's your song! I remember how nervous you were when you said this song is about me” A giggle bubbled out from her, but it faded when she saw tears pricking in the corner of his eyes; it hung there and never fell.
He was still holding on. Even though the thorns had embedded in his heart, causing it to bleed and slowly fall apart.
“It's our song, baby. You never accept that although I say it millions of times.” He whispered to himself. His heart ached at the memory, her giggle and smile.
She slumped back to the seat, hugging herself as the temperature around her dropped. The faint smell of the flowers wafted in the air — it was her favourite flower.
Soon, a graveyard rolled into his view and he parked the car beside a tree. Picking up the flowers on the back seat, he trudged his way to a place. She followed him closely from behind.
His steps stopped at a grave and the tears finally poured down to his cheeks.
The bits of his heart that he was collecting had fallen. He couldn't hold it anymore.
Her smile wavered as she peeked at her name carved into the gravestone.
Jisung settled on the grass, leaving the flowers beside her grave.
“Happy anniversary, baby. I’m sorry I was late. If I’m a bit early, you’re officially my wife, right?” He sniffled and smiled, a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes.
“How are you? I hope the angels are taking care of you. They probably take care of you better than I am” he chuckles dryly, a slight sympathy to himself.
She kneeled beside him and wanted to wipe his tears off but her fingers just slipped through his face.
Ah. Could someone give her another chance to take care of him again?
“I’m sorry, Y/N. I didn't save you”
“Why are you blaming yourself, Jisung? You try to save me…”
“If I cut my leg that day, will you be alive by now?”
“Baby…none of this is your fault.”
A conversation with death always ends up pointless. They couldn't reply to you but at least it would help you to move on, wasn't it?
The flashback of that day winded back in his head.
They were on their way to their wedding ceremony.
Moments later, their car was tumbling out of the road, rolling off the cliff.
His legs were stuck under the heavy tree branches but he was breathing, barely
One glance to the side, his bride was unconscious, shattered glasses stabbing her in various places.
He blinked and he was back at the grave, forced to stare at her grave again. Yet, she was still by his side, staring at her name and her death date, unmoved. Her heart was begging for her to stay
But she knew she couldn't stay here any longer. Not where she no longer belonged to earth.
Wrapping her arm around his waist, she rested her head on his shoulder, eyes closing as she felt herself vanishing, bits by bits, from reality.
“I love you, Jisung. Always and forever”
A warm wind brushed his cheeks out of sudden, bringing a fond smile to him amidst the running tears. Raising his chin, his gaze was met with the soft blue sky. A white butterfly landed on his cheeks, its wings flipping graciously and swiped the tears off.
A light giggle escaped him as he closed his eyes, the thorns in his heart had untangled themself, letting his heart beat with ease. After a while, the butterfly flew away.
“You're here earlier, aren't you? Thank you for the comfort. I love you, always and forever, Y/N”
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atoriv-art ¡ 1 day ago
Note
what are your thoughts on the hyuga siblings and their relationship
OOF now thats one of my favorite naruto dynamics lmao. i think neji and hinata have a very interesting relationship and i say that as someone who really didn't (and tbh still doesn't) love how that relationship developed in canon
i really like the hyuga fight in the chunin exams because the way it's perceived is sooo interesting to me.. neji comes off as an outright bully and i don't even blame the kids for calling him an asshole after all of that, but from reader's perspective it's really obvious that his animosity only exists because of a larger issue...
neji shouldn't treat hinata the way he does, but he does so because of her unique position as a scorned heir. she still benefits from everything that makes his life awful - her life is still valued more than his - but hiashi hates her enough that he won't care if neji dishes out verbal abuse on her. it's an awful dynamic and definitely contributes to hinata's terrible self-worth, but it's a symptom of the life they have been forced into by the man who the manga is intent on letting escape all of the blame for this situation lmao
(hiashi himself can be a really fascinating case honestly. i think he fully means everything he says, which is what makes him so grating but fun to me LOL. his apology to neji is entirely sincere AND it completely misses the point of all of the issues, but neji is young and deprived of acknowledgement enough that he accepts it wholeheartedly. hiashi thinks he's the best uncle of all time.)
hinata herself has so little belief in her own worth that she just sits there and takes whatever abuse people throw at her... i don't actually think neji's anger towards her was a constant - i think some people interpret it that way - rather i feel like it was something that came up whenever he was pushed too far. in more normal circumstances where he's not being made to fight her directly, he was likely more detached than anything. he wanted nothing to do with her.
in one of the filler mini arcs ive mentioned before (i think. the one that focuses on hanabi and hinata) there's a scene that rang very true to me (and im gonna recount this without rewatching it atm so sorry if i get details wrong,): neji was being made to train with hinata, asked to be allowed to leave because he felt his time was being wasted and correctly noted that it doesn't have to be him here, was told no by hiashi and then he started getting vicious and violent. towards hinata, of course, not hiashi. he then got horribly punished for it LOL i think that's the general dynamic they were living in, neji reaches a limit of disrespect that he can take and explodes on the nearest most acceptable target (we loove a boy with no emotional regulation <3), goes too far and suffers the consequence of it while nothing else changes. to him interacting with hinata at all is just asking for pain, either emotional or straight up physical
But, for hinata, she saw herself and neji as similar (the black sheep of the family i suppose), and would have liked to bond over that fact; theyve known each other since they were very little and she outright refers to him as a brother. it's clear to me she's always cared a lot about neji and imo feels responsible for what happened to his father (something that hiashi doesn't help with. Dad of the year), so she saw their match in the exams as a chance to close the distance between them and get neji to see her as a person, an equal instead of a symbol to lash out on.
but, you know, she was 12 LMAO so she ended up pressing all of his buttons instead and it led to his famous outburst, which led to the famous moment of Every Single Jonin (other than asuma.) coming to stop him and further cementing his belief that her life is seen as special. i think (and this is a mix of Shit I Made up, and Me trying to make sense of the manga's insane mishandling of their plotline) that despite her trying her hardest to reach neji she didn't really grasp the horror of his situation. that's the tragedy of neji's life really LMAO, no one really tries to grapple with the severity of what having that curse mark does to a person. she thought of his fatalism as more of a psychological, metaphorical way of dealing with hurt and not like... "my life literally does not belong to me no matter how much i try to fight it"
this is loooooong take this readmore.
i think hiashi-hizashi were hoping that the cousins could have had a better relationship than they did... letting them hang out often and stuff, introducing them early, hizashi not discouraging neji from being friendly with her, to me it all reads as very "ok well this didn't work for Us, but what if it works out for them... even though literally nothing has changed". they were proper family once and hizashi wanted to die for his brother, not his leader, so that just makes sense to me.
i do nautttt like the naruto vs neji fight so to keep the post positive i will gloss over it <3 but hinata and neji's relationship post-chunin exams to me is peak like. God i wish this was done better because it could have been soooo good
neji realizes that his anger is consuming him and adjusts his behavior accordingly, getting a lot of his kindness back, and he becomes intent on fixing his relationship with hinata... i don't hate that premise at all, it's just the way it's executed that bothers me!
the impression i got (and i could be mistaken im in the process of rewatching the anime + rereading the manga) is that their relationship getting better is done exclusively through like. neji repenting for being mean to her. which, don't get me wrong, he SHOULD apologize (AND THAT WOULDVE BEEN A COOL THING TO SEE ONSCREEN, BTW) but you CANNOT divorce his behavior from the hyuga system in general. from the way they act after the exams you would think their issues were born solely from neji being a bully for no reason, and not, like... him lashing out on her because his uncle is literally the devil.
i don't think hinata has the power to change a lot in her clan on short notice (she did get disowned. did that un-happen offscreen? we will never know. Hiashi gets to be a grandfather to her children btw.) but i certainly would have liked to see her standing up for branch members and in the stuff i draw that's the story i have in mind LMAO. like, her gaining a deeper understanding of neji's situation and trying to work against her father trying to make her cousin's life better? i think that would have been really sweet and even show her gaining more confidence in herself and her beliefs. you can still have neji fussing over her and being protective because he feels bad for how they used to be, i actually really like that because neji IS a very sweet person, i just reject the idea that it's his sole Moral Obligation to put everything aside and make things better by the power of I Will Die For You Now, But This Time, For The Right Reasons
as for hanabi i wish she had more screentime soooo bad because i'm obsessed with how she gives off Haunted Child vibes lmfao. talking abt her requires me to expose myself a little bit and have to admit hiashi is kind of a blorbo to me because of how much he sucks ass, but like. Essentially his insane resentment of hinata was born when hizashi died, it doesnt matter it wasn't really her fault, he needed someone to blame and he would never blame himself, at least not outwardly lol. hiashi did genuinely love his brother, it just didn't stop him from being a monster to him, and he is certainly not gonna grapple with that now that he's dead!
(and, you know, the whole "sorry we sent a guy to kidnap an heir. you do need to die for killing him though" thing is really dumb but if we stop at every single stupid thing in naruto we will be here all day.)
with all that being said i think hiashi tries his best to make hanabi everything hinata isn't, and he has very little interest in having her and hinata have any bond at all. he just left neji and hinata to fester in that god-awful dynamic with no supervising, and took hanabi as the best direction for the clan to head towards. but, you know, father of the year is very demanding and doesn't seem to be very fatherly to her at all from the little we see of them. she's just like. a good soldier, and that's what he needs.
i think hanabi growing to resent her sister for the situation she's been put into (if hinata weren't 'weak' she wouldn't have so much responsibility) is very interesting! by the time we meet her i think she's learned that the best thing to do wrt her sister is to just ignore that she exists. as for neji he barely registers as a presence to her; neji has no reason to interact with her and hiashi has no reason to incentivize it. it's very fun to me!
in general i really like all of their dynamics can be used to explore how hurt and trauma drive people apart, i could talk about them for hourssss LMAO i love the suna family for the same reason!
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fantasy-relax ¡ 2 days ago
Text
Sweet Alpha, Dangerous Omega
Part 17
When you closed your eyes, the only thing you could see was the expression of terror on the face of that poor maid, the blood covering your feet, and in your ears the echo of that man's cries resonated.
You cried for two days, silencing your screams and moans out of habit, hurting your throat as a result.
When your free days were over you moved automatically, nodding and shaking your head as was appropriate.
Your mind kept going over the scene and every day it gave you a new detail, the shadows took the form of hands trying to catch you and the puddles grew in size until you could feel the liquid through your shoes.
When you slept you relived the memory over and over again, every part, every second trapped until Cassandra came to free you from the cycle, Cassandra with her face covered in blood and a smile that showed her sharp fangs.
Your feelings of disgust and horror that the cruel scene caused you disappeared when you saw the Omega, speaking to you in a soft tone trying to give you relief.
“Blood and human flesh are our sustenance”
You had ignored the rumors surrounding the castle and the Dimitrescu because you knew firsthand how they could be twisted for someone else's benefit.
“We need it to live”
Every being needs sustenance to continue, plants, fungi, animals and humans.
And this could be different, adapted to the needs of each being.
“You understand, right?”
Of course.
“It's part of me”
Cassandra was not human.
“You love me, right?”
Did you?
Was it love you felt? You had never felt it before, all your life you have focused on surviving, and no one tried to get close to you unless it was to hurt you.
Was it love? The day you found Cassandra you acted on instinct, an Alpha protecting an Omega from danger, an Alpha attracted to an Omega in Heat.
Was it love? What enticed you was the fact that someone wanted you, desired you, needed you. For once you felt that your life was worth something.
Was it love? Cassandra was beautiful, more than once your gaze fell on her biceps observing even the smallest detail when she threw the easels.
Was it love? You were attracted to Cassandra's attitude, demanding and firm not letting anyone walk all over her, strong and stubborn pursuing what she wants without fear, gentle and sentimental, a side that you had seen during her Heat and in the stories her sisters told you.
You didn't know if it was love, but you knew it wouldn't take long to become that.
What should you do?
You turned to see the fur beside your bed, covered to the fiber of your scent.
The next step in courtship was to provide sustenance, food.
Providing your Omega with everything she needed and asked for was your duty as Alpha.
Your Omega needed human flesh for sustenance.
And it was your duty to provide it.
Hunting, killing another human, ending someone else's life for the chance at a Mate was selfish, cruel and depraved…
And so damn tempting.
-----------------------------------------------------
Despite your silence Dorothea could get an idea of ​​what had happened, after all gossiping was the servants' source of entertainment.
A few days ago, some prisoners escaped and their pieces ended up scattered in the hallway, her team salvaged as much as they could, after all wasting it meant someone else would take its place.
It was a grotesque scene, but over the years Dorothea has adapted to many things and made sure her team did too.
You, on the other hand, were gentler than you seemed to be at first look, despite the horrendous treatment you had experienced, witnessing such a scene surely was a tremendous shock for you.
However, if you wanted to court a Dimitrescu, even more so to Mate with one, you had to understand and accept their inhumanity.
When Dorothea found out about you, she didn't give it much importance, one more face walking on the edge of her knife.
She never thought she would become fond of you, she blames her wife for that, when it comes to Relia the barriers of her heart crumble easily as wet paper.
She never dreams that she would get to see Cassandra in harmony with her subgenre. For the new maids it wasn't much of a difference, but for the older ones the change in the young mistress's behavior was obvious.
Even though Miss Cassandra groaned in annoyance and Lady Dimitrescu turned a blind eye at her pup behavior, there was no doubt that the young mistress acted like a high-class Omega challenging her chosen one to see if she met her standards, if she was worthy of being her mate.
It was adorable and hilarious to watch.
So, Dorothea had faith in you, letting you process things in your own time despite Relia's whining was the best thing to do.
- "What is Cassandra's favorite food? Her preferences?"-
Your voice sounded hoarse from disuse, your face was pale, and your hands were shaking, yet you kept your gaze in her eyes, determined to get answers.
And Dorotthea gave them to you.
You have finally made your decision.
--------------------------------------------------------------
Dorothea gave you information about Cassandra's preferences and your butchering skills were more than enough to prepare the meat.
You just had to choose the prey.
The inhabitants of the castle were off limits due to the rules imposed by Lady Dimitrescu and Bela, out of respect you did not want to disobey them. Besides, you don’t want to ruin the good atmosphere you had with your workshop colleagues and the kitchen team.
In the village there are drunks everywhere, being prey to the Lycans is common, no one would care if one disappeared.
"How dare you even think of giving meat of such a disgusting level to our Omega?"
Your Alpha was right.
Cassandra deserved the best and your duty was to give it to her or die trying.
You had to hunt healthy prey, with enough meat to be nutritious and fat to give flavor.
Drunks were off the table.
You needed meat to offer Cassandra as food.
You needed quality meat, not too old, not too young, not too fat, not too thin, free of vices and with a healthy diet.
And while you had made your decision, snatching a child from its parents or parents from their child weighed on your conscience, you would stain your hands with blood anyway, but at least you wanted to sleep without dreaming about empty cribs and children crying.
You closed your eyes reviewing the faces of the village that you could remember, who met your requirements?
Image after image crossed your mind until you found the answer.
A couple at the peak of their age.
A couple with a balanced diet.
A couple with a life free of alcohol and cigarettes.
A couple whose parents have already died.
A couple without brothers or cousins.
A couple whose offspring is cursed.
When you opened your eyes the heaviness on your shoulders disappeared.
You have already made your decision.
Your two free days were close, you would use one to confirm the routine of your prey and on the second you would attack.
You would not let doubt consume you; you would take the next step as soon as possible.
Cassandra had waited more than enough.
--------------------------------------------
You couldn't find Greta anywhere, you needed to tell her about your temporary departure, it was either her or Bela but considering that neither of the Dimitrescu had approached you it was easy to assume that the blonde was not an option.
“Omega must be furious at our uncertainty and cowardice”
The shame of having run without looking at her burned you and the only thing that could extinguish it was to demonstrate your devotion and acceptance towards her.
Through the offering of fresh meat.
You couldn't waste any more time, so you took the risk.
- “A trip outside the castle?” - The maid was someone you had seen working close to Greta and held a higher rank than you, Olivia.
- “I’ll be back before nightfall on the second day.”- Leaving the castle temporarily wasn't that strange, as long as you had permission from the Dimitrescu or the Head Maid and returned on time, you were safe.
However, Greta had chosen the perfect day to take a vacation because you couldn't find any trace of her and time was passing.
- “Ok, as long as you arrive on time, there won't be a problem. I'll let her know your whereabouts.”-
You breathed a sigh of relief and offered her a grateful smile.
- “Thank you.”-
She smiled back at you.
- “My pleasure.” –
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After making sure your backpack was hidden, you covered your body in mud to hide your scent and set off on a path you knew by heart.
The house where your prey lived was somewhat far from the town, it wasn't on the edge like your cabin, but the distance was enough so that the neighbors couldn't hear screams.
It's not like you were planning on making a scene, being in better shape didn't mean you could fight a mob by hand.
Hiding among the branches of a sturdy tree your vigil began.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
After confirming the routine your prey followed, you prepared for the hunt. While attacking at night was perfect to avoid drawing attention, the darkness would be a disadvantage to you too and would cause trouble, plus the Lycans tended to be active at those hours.
Your plan was to enter the house just as the woman was cooking, as she used too many spices they would hide whatever leftover of your scent, you would finish her off quickly and hide her body in a closed room. When the man came home you would make noise to draw his attention and the moment he entered you would pierce his throat with an arrow to prevent him from screaming and then finish him off. With your two preys caught you would proceed to bleed them into two buckets and then dismember the bodies, focusing on taking only Cassandra's favorite pieces because you couldn't carry both bodies at once and making a double trip increased the chances of being discovered by the others more inhabitants or the Lycans. So, you would put everything you could in the backpack, cover the buckets to avoid spills and then start your way back to the castle.
After taking a bath, you would take your gifts and go to Cassandra's room to deliver them. You would apologize for your delay and depending on her answer...
Whether yes, or no, there is no turning back.
-------------------------------
You have to be fast and discreet.
Entering the house without being seen,  went to the kitchen where the woman was.
Alone.
Her attention was focused on the stew on the stove, the smell of the spices was strong enough to impregnate the kitchen and the entire house.
You approached her slowly.
And with quick hands in a precise movement, you broke her neck.
The body fell at your feet writhing unable to scream, her gaze fell on you which made you lower your head and maintain a submissive posture.
Mother detested your rebellion.
“She is not a mother, she is prey”
Prey, yes, the woman was prey.
When you turned to see her, her eyes were already empty of life.
She would never look at you with contempt again.
You would never hear her insults again.
You would never feel the pain of the whip against your back for looking at her wrong, for speaking to her wrong, for breathing wrong, for existing wrong.
Never.
You took a deep breath and, taking her legs, you dragged her to the closet.
Before closing the door, you looked at the lifeless body once more.
- “Goodbye Mother” -
Your next prey had to be caught off guard.
--------------------------------------------------------
You kept your eyes on the kitchen door.
The soup was still burning to keep the smell of the spices, your prey was a veteran hunter, even covered in mud, he could detect your scent.
You heard the footsteps approaching and prepared your bow.
A shot to the throat to stop him from screaming and then you would finish him off with your knife.
That was the plan.
However, the arrow missed its target, nailing itself centimeters above the man's head, who immediately turned to look at you.
You froze.
- “What the fuck?” – The man's confusion soon turned to anger, before you could prepare another arrow, he lunged at you.
- “What are you doing here?!” -
- “Where's my wife?!”-
- “What have you done?!”-
Each question was punctuated with a blow.
“Stop being so defensive! Attack!”
- “I should have blown your brains out a long time ago” –
“Fight!”
- “Damn aberration” –
“Fight!”
He got up from your beaten body to take out his gun.
- “I'll end your miserable life once and for all” –
“Don't you dare to leave our Omega alone!”
You kicked his crotch before he could take off the safety, the man dropped the gun in pain, but you didn't grab it. You tackled him, knocking him to the ground and threw punch after punch.
In these three months you gained weight and the work in the workshop helped you build muscle.
The man was an old Beta, and you were a healthy young Alpha.
Unlike you he could not coordinate because he was not used to being the one receiving the beating.
- “No more” – No more punches, no more kicks, no more insults, no more begging, no more pleading.
The man's movements were weak and slow
- “Never” – You would never allow him to put his hands on your Mate.
The movement ceased.
You looked at the bloody face of the man and instead of feeling guilty for killing him you felt guilty for having wasted blood.
In the end they were right…
- “Goodbye Father”-
…the blood in your veins meant nothing.
------------------------------------------------
You tied two ropes to different ceiling beams and hung the bodies, placed the buckets and proceeded to cut their necks.
You sharpened your knives while you waited, when not a drop more fell you lowered them and laid them on the floor.
*THUMP*
You proceeded to cut so you could take the pieces that Dorotthea confirmed were Cassandra's favorites.
“Omega will be happy with our gift”
Blood covered the walls, the floor, your face, your clothes and your hands.
*THUMP*
You had killed your parents.
*THUMP*
They raised you.
*THUMP*
They fed you.
*THUMP*
They punished you.
*THUMP*
They tortured you.
*THUMP*
They never defended you.
*THUMP*
They abandoned you.
*THUMP*
And you killed them.
*THUMP*
It was your decision
*SLASH*
No one forced you; no one ordered you.
*SLASH*
It was your choice
*SLASH*
You are a murderer.
*SLASH*
A traitor to humanity.
*SLASH*
They betrayed you first.
*SLASH*
They attacked you first
*SLASH*
They abandoned you first.
*SLASH*
In the castle there are people who care about you, who appreciate you and take care of you.
*SLASH*
In the castle there is your pack.
*SLASH*
In the castle there is the woman who sought you out, who chose you.
*THUMP*
Your actions are breaking you
You are falling piece by piece.
*Drip*
And from the pieces that fall you will create a Mate worthy of her.
*Drip*
But you can't help but fear that it will all be in vain and all that awaits you is another rejection.
*Drip, drip, drip*
How much longer can you keep persevering?
*Sniff*
How much longer?
----------------------------------------------------
- “The Alpha is gone!” –
No…
Bela trusted you, had faith in you and this is how you repay her?
… is it her fault? Did you keep your resentment close to your chest until the opportunity to escape presented itself?
Did she ruin her little sister's chance because of her recklessness?
- “Cassandra!” - Daniela's scream brought her back to the present and she could finally notice the scent that fluttered around the room like a hurricane.
Anger and determination
Cassandra had gone from sadness and self-pity to anger.
- “Fuck this” -
How much she had missed seeing that flame.
- “Alpha is mine” - A statement that no one dared to deny.
Your fate was sealed from the moment Mother brought you, no, from the moment Cassandra trusted you in her most vulnerable state.
You belonged to Cassandra and Bela refused to fail her little sister again.
But… if Bela found you first, she would give you the chance to explain yourself and she would listen to you until the end before punching you.
She owed you after all.
--------------------------------------------------------------
- “The Alpha is gone!” –
Daniela blinked, trying to dispel the hallucination in front of her.
Because it has to be a hallucination, you would never abandon them, you would never abandon Cassandra, the Omega you courted with fervent adoration.
… right?
But when she turned to see the stupefied faces of her family, she knew it was not an illusion.
You were gone, the moment she stopped watching you, the moment she placed her complete trust was the moment you decided to escape.
How could you live like that? They had given you their full blessing to court Cassandra and not counting the accident with Lucia they had been more than kind to you.
Didn't you love her sister?
Daniela looked at Cassandra and relief coursed through her veins as she noticed that the emptiness in her eyes had been replaced with the fury that characterized her.
Her sister stood up from Mother's lap, her scent intensifying with each passing second.
Anger and determination
The relief quickly turned to fear.
What was Cassandra going to do to you?
- "Cassandra!" - As much as your betrayal hurt, she couldn't let you die, they could still fix it, they could still convince you.
- "Fuck this" - Did she decide to end the courtship? End you? No, her sister would never give up.
- "Alpha is mine" - Cassandra growled the words, her eyes shining with the intensity of the sun itself and Daniela knew that her sister was finally in harmony with her Omega.
And they were ready to capture their escapist Alpha.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Mother had stayed in the castle to prepare Cassandra's room.
- "You would need a comfortable collar to wear and long chains"-
See? Mother had finally accepted you, she gave you permission to be in Cassandra's room outside of her heat.
Chained, but those are minor details.
According to the information they obtained, only Olivia had seen you leave; after what happened with Lucia, all the maids avoided you, the only ones who didn't were Dorothea's pack and Relia's group; but because it was your two days off, they didn't know your whereabouts because for them you were locked in your room as you always did.
Cassandra caught your scent without difficulty and without wasting time she followed the trail until she lost it a few meters before reaching the town.
An admirable feat because Cassandra's sense of smell was the best in the pack. They decided to split up to search for the town, Cassandra would cover the north starting from your cabin, Bela would cover the south and she would patrol the surroundings.
Being the fastest she could cover the perimeter of the village in minutes and her eyesight was far superior to her sisters, even in complete darkness she could see for miles there was no way you could escape from her.
On her third lap she saw it, a figure covered in blood walking with difficulty through the forest. Focusing more she could recognize its features.
Your features.
She found you.
* “I found her” *
* “On my way” *
* “Don’t let her escape Daniela” *
In less than a minute she was standing in front of you
- “I can’t believe you did this, after everything we’ve been through together, I gave you my friendship and you spit in my face, com-
*THUMP*
You dropped the buckets you were carrying to soon vomit on a poor bush.
Oh, shit she forgot you were covered in blood.
She came over and checked you over as you continued to expel your guts.
You were covered in bruises and the occasional scrape, but you had no wounds that could cause bleeding.
The blood wasn't yours.
The smell of blood was stronger in the buckets, bending down she took the lid off one.
Blood.
Fresh blood.
Fresh man's blood.
She moved her hand to taste it, but stopped when she heard you scream and notice the threat in your scent.
-“NO!”- You had never spoken to her like that - “It's not for you”-
Your posture and your scent made it clear that if she decided to ignore your words you were going to attack her.
She slowly covered the bucket and with the same care stood up, at no time did you stop watching her.
You were alert, tense and covered in blood.
What had you done?
The sound of a swarm arriving caught the attention of both of you.
-“Who do you think you are, Little Alpha?” – Bela growled.
Cassandra would not take long to arrive.
Her sister checked you from head to toe, approached you and flicked you on the forehead with a finger.
- “Didn’t I tell you to let me know if you needed anything?”- She said, quickly taking your face and wiping it with the rag she always carried in her pocket – “Leaving the castle without permission or notice warrants punishment, what’s your excuse?”-
- “I couldn’t find you nor Greta, but I told Olivia that I would be back in two days at most, being Greta’s second in command I thought there would be no problem”- Huh, it seems that the dungeon will have a new guest.
- “What was so important that you couldn’t wait?” - Daniela had an idea and from the sidelong glance of her older sister she had also drawn her conclusions.
- “I-” – You opened your eyes and hurriedly walked away from Bela to take off the backpack you were carrying on your back.
*BUZZ*
Cassandra had finally arrived.
Both Bela and her walked away from you, however Daniela remained alert to protect you in case Cassandra’s fury was unleashed.
But Cassandra reformed silently, without screaming and without attacking, walking towards you with an indifferent face that was betrayed by the scent fluttering around her.
Anger
Despite that, the one who shortened the distance between the two of you was you.
You knelt at Cassandra's feet to place the backpack in front of you and the two buckets flanking it.
- "Omega" - Your voice was firm, but Daniela could notice the slight tremor in it, - "My behavior the previous nights was regrettable and I understand if you wish to end the courtship," - You raised your head and she was sure that in your eyes there was only that perpetual adoration - "Even so, I dare to beg for another chance and as an apology for my horrible behavior I give you sustenance from prey that I hunted with my hands" -
You opened the backpack and Daniela gulped because the wrappers were useless, only the smell gave away its contents.
Fresh meat.
Fresh human meat.
Of man and woman.
You bowed your head in reverence as you bumped your bloody and wounded fists together, a courtship posture that she had only read about in her books.
- “I promise you that you will never be cold because I will give you shelter, you will never go hungry because I will bring you food, you will never be alone because I will be by your side until the day I breathe my last breath; dear Omega, beloved Cassandra, could you forgive this pathetic Alpha?”-
Daniela bit her hand hard to silence her excited cry while with the other she shook Bela's shoulder until her sister slapped her without looking at her because just like her, she was focused on the scene in front of her.
Cassandra took one of the pieces of the backpack and when she opened it two pairs of eyes in perfect condition were in the palm of her hand, Daniela licked her lips hungrily, after all eyes are the favorite snack of the three and for which they are always competing.
Her sister took one and examined it in detail and then set her gaze on you.
- "Alpha, look at me" - You obeyed in seconds like a trained dog.
Cassandra placed the eye between her teeth and chewed it without closing her mouth, she did it slowly without looking away from you.
While Daniela could not see your face your scent revealed the disgust you felt towards the action.
Her sister took another and repeated the process, always staring at you.
Despite your clear displeasure you did not look away for even a second.
When you finished Cassandra smiled and that was enough for your displeasure to be replaced by pure and absolute euphoria.
Her sister's smile faded, and she leaned down to held your face, her gloved hands stained with the blood from her snack but you didn't seem to care as a content rumble came from your chest.
- "Did you leave the castle just to hunt?" –
- "Yes, I used my two days off and told Olivia I'd be back before nightfall on the second day." –
- "Why didn't you look for Greta to inform her directly?" –
- "I looked for her, but I didn't find her neither I find B-" You flinched and hissed in pain before continuing – "L-Lady Bela and I didn't want to waste any more time."
- "Why in such a hurry?" –
- "I've made you wait too long." –
Cassandra brought her face closer to yours and her whisper was clear to her superior ears.
- "I think the same." –
And she kissed you.
Cassandra, out of her Heat, totally in control of her actions, kissed you.
SHE KISSED YOU.
Daniela screamed without a voice and proceeded to do three backflips before kneeling and raising her hands to the sky.
- “Praise the Dark God”- She whispered with all the gratitude and happiness her body could generate.
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