#especially when you know the person thinks they’re unlovable and that no one cares about them

[bugsybaritone]

I love remembering the last thing my former best friend and said to me, totally doesn’t make me want to scream and sob and rip my skin off

[estrellogy]

Astro Notes Pt. 3

I have a lot of thoughts and observations that I want to share 😭 If you have any recommendations, please let me know as well 🤍

- People often see 7th house as their ideal partner, but YOU are meant to embrace traits of that sign for growth.

For example, a Libra rising will begin to see more personal growth after learning positive traits from Aries e.g. Being more assertive, believing in themselves instead of looking for others’ approval, putting themselves first, etc.

- This might be a controversial opinion, but I don’t think minor asteroids influence your chart. Asteroids like Bride, Groom, and other very specific ones. The interpretations for them can usually be found somewhere in your main placements already. It can make you over complicate your chart and feel even more disconnected with yourself because you don’t focus on your core energy.

Not every small detail about you has to be explained by astrology. At the end of the day, you’re a person with free will and complex experiences that shape you beyond astrology. This is just a tool, not a determiner of your life.

- Pluto in 5th house 🤝 destroying/deleting your creative works when they’re not up to your standards

- The difference between Venus/Pluto hard versus soft aspects is in their expression. They all are intense, magnetic, and obsessive to some degree. However, hard aspects have a harder time owning these traits so they tend to swing between extremes (e.g. total obsession and then indifference). The soft aspects are just as intense and can have the same toxic tendencies as the hard aspects, BUT they have an easier time accepting it as a part of them and seem more ‘stable’.

- 6th house placements are so overlooked! That’s literally the house of your health and daily life. I notice that when you work with your 6th house energy effectively, other areas of your life also improve.

It’s interesting that 6th house comes right before 7th house of relationships. In order to be in a relationship with someone else, you have to take good care of yourself first!

- Aries and Mars aspects (especially hard ones) can overpower other aspects in your chart until you learn how to master that energy and channel them into something productive

- Jupiter in 12th house used to be seen as negative. But I think Jupiter here is one of the luckiest placements to have. This is the placements of coincidences happening in their favors, things lining up in crazy ways, book falling off the shelf right at the page they need to read. Their experiences feel divine.

They are very connected to the Universe, Source, Spirit Guides, or whatever you believe in! Anyone can with practice, but these things come more naturally for them.

- Shoutout to my Virgo Venus and Capricorn Mars for being the only things that stop me from going off the rails 😍

- Saturn in 11th house often feel unloved by the people around them due to earlier experiences with rejection. Saturn is trying to teach them to unconditionally accept themselves. Also, those bad experiences teach them how to read people a lot better and spot the ones with bad intentions. The reward from Saturn will be genuine, solid, and loyal friendships/connections.

I’m so glad you guys enjoy these silly notes! I have a ton of fun making them 😭

[srslyscary]

things they’ve said

things bf!skz has said to you

Including: bang chan, changbin, hyunjin, lee know, seungmin, han, felix, jeongin

Bang Chan

; “you’re too cute for this world, Y’know?”

; “don’t doubt yourself babe. you’re amazing in my eyes.”

; “not every day do you get to wake up to a gorgeous gal.”

; “I know it’s late, but check out this track I made— yeah it’s about you, what about it babe?”

; “stain my face with your pretty lips baby, I want everyone to know I belong to you— yeah with that new lipstick you bought, it’s a cute color. perfect for complimenting my face.”

; “i have seven kids and now they’re also YOUR seven kids.. deal with it, hah.”

; “you’re shorter than me, so your love capacity isn’t as strong as mine. it’s physically impossible for you to love me more babe.”

; “I can’t take my eyes off you. you’re just too pretty— I’m not trying to be creepy!— no— Y’know what I just won’t look at you then.. hehe.”

; “you deserve the universe.”

; “it’s kind of hard to unlove you sweetheart.”

; “it’s only been 2 minutes how do you already miss me.”

; “baby all I wanna do is see you. and do you.— just kidding… or am I?”

; “my goal is to keep you happy all the time.”

; “I love you because you’re the best. intellectual wise I REALLY would hate for someone to touch you lovingly like I do.”

; “excuse the fact that we’re locked in for life and you can’t go anywhere without me- HAHA.”

; “I got addicted to you very easily.”

; “I think I’m just in love with everything you do.”

; “I love you. I don’t think I said that enough today.”

Changbin

; “y’know what we should do? go have a picnic and watch the sunset. wouldn’t that be nice?”

; “you’re always pretty jagiya. you’re especially pretty without makeup.”

; “i’m tired. let’s cuddle, kay? I wanna feel you wrapped up in my arms, I’ll know you’re safe with me then.”

; “I literally just can’t have enough of you.”

; “I’ve been looking at pictures of you for the last 30 minutes—“

; “I like you mostest— no I love you. I’m IN love with you.”

; “wanna ft and eat together?”

; “You’re perfect to me. You always will be— it’s not cheesy it’s the truth!— accept my compliments right now!”

; “stop being stingy and give me more kisses! I’ll die if you don’t smother me— it’s true my doctor says so!”

; “your presence heals me.”

; “You’re like my healing wave and my bright sun.”

; “I can’t even describe in words how sexy you are right now- you’re just- WOW.”

; “FOOD DATEEEE! YAYYYY!”

; “I want you in every way that there is to want a person.”

; “You’re sweet, and hot.. good mix in my opinion.”

; “you should stay up.. I wanna keep flirting with you.”

Hyunjin

; “I wanted to talk to you. I miss your voice and your laugh, and your pretty face.”

; “my love, you could be more discreet if you’re trying to scare me— USING MINHO AS A SCARE TACTIC ISN’T FAIR EITHER!”

; “I’ll be as sassy as I want. Now give me a kiss I’m craving them— yes I’m on my period now hand them over or else.”

; “jokes on you, you’re my number one priority right now. the boys can wait a little while longer.”

; “I wanna stay up and talk to you.— What do you mean no?— that’s too bad, you’re not my mom.”

; “you mean more than the world to me.”

; “I don’t care who he was. he was looking at you the way I look at you. and I should be the ONLY person to look at you like that— cmon love.”

; “I’m physically craving your touch right now— I just want to sock you in the face and then kiss it right where it hurts— I’m joking I love you!”

; “I always wanna be by your side angel.”

; “You’re cute when you’re sleepy.”

; “I’m painting you love, what else would I be doing?”

Lee Know

; “you literally captivate me. your eyes especially. I could spend hours looking at your pretty face and never get bored.”

; “one day I’m gonna train my cats to come beat you up.”

; “I’m gonna punch you in the mouth. With my mouth. Softly.— yea I’m going to kiss you.”

; “stop saying things that make me want to kiss the hell out of you. it’s not funny— don’t laugh!”

; “I want your lips, I want your everything. or rather- I want you here so I can hold you.”

; “when I talk to you.. it’s like talking to my best friend. except I love you and I get to kiss you all over and all that cool stuff.”

; “your stubborn ass is never gonna listen— also I love your ass. literally.”

; “I’m really just.. fucking soft when it comes to you.”

; “yeah babe. you’re really pretty. the prettiest.”

; “You’re literally dreaming i didn’t say that— how’s that gaslighting?!”

; “you make me think of a love song every time I look at you.”

; “baby, just kiss me.”

; “Sure, we can get matching outfits.”

Seungmin

; “you look so innocent but I know you’re not— that makes me weak.”

; “I can tell you so many times how pretty you are, because you’re my pretty puppy and no one else’s.”

; “kinda wanna take you out for dinner— what I’m just saying?”

; “relax pretty puppy, I’m all yours.”

; “I wanna see you drunk off my kisses.”

; “I just like whacked Han in the back of the head and he started crying- funniest thing ever.”

; “we look cute together, don’t you agree?”

; “let’s live together, I hate everyone else except you.”

; “you haven’t talked to me since 12:03pm. I’m lonely. talk to me babe.”

; “it’s not like I hate going out. I just hate everyone else gets to see how pretty you are.”

; “didn’t you say you liked these?— yeah I got ‘em for you.”

; “babe, you’re constantly reading that. what is it?”

; “wanna come watch me practice?”

; “that dress is cute babe, you should get it.”

; “You’re so stupidly cute, it’s getting annoying.”

; “babe, I love you— but stop trying to get me to buy you that dog.”

Han

; “BABE GUESS WHAT— I love you!”

; “hi beautiful, I hope you had a good day!”

; “You’re so cute babeeee, you literally make my heart melt.”

; “wake up I miss you.”

; “baby, have I ever told you how pretty you are?— mhm! the prettiest.”

; “You’re all I’ll ever need.”

; “daily reminder that I’m so in love with you-!”

; “I woke up and the first thing I wanted was you.”

; “this pretty face is all mine— mine to kiss and stare at and compliment.”

; “my favorite thing to look at is you of course!!”

; “TODAY REMINDS ME OF YOU— BECAUSE ITS HOT.”

; “I got butterflies when you called me pretty.”

; “I stay up just to talk to you babe.”

; “girl the only side chicks I got are your other personalities.”

; “You’re always on my mind, duh.”

; “honestly my mom would be so proud of me if I brought you home.”

; “you have me on some foreign level of happy.”

; “why is it that birds chirp to communicate? let’s chirp to communicate baby! — IT’S NOT WEIRD IT’S NATURE.”

; “how’s your day going my beautiful future wife?”

; “face time meeee, I’m with the boyssss, they wanna say hi to my girlll!”

; “I want you. Only you.”

; “just kiss me and don’t stop.”

Felix

; “good morning angel. sleep well?”

; “I want all of you forever. you and your perfect face, your perfect body, your perfect personality.”

; “me and chan bought ice cream! wanna share with me?”

; “BABE THERE’S A SPIDER— oh right.. yeah I’ll kill it-“

; “so you’re saying you saw a cat and your first thought was to text me about it?— god I love you.”

; “you just have me so whipped. I’d do anything for you.”

; “sunshine, can I tell the boys about you?”

; “You’re my entire universe, and whatever is beyond that.”

; “such a pretty face, can’t believe I get to kiss you and call you mine.”

; “of course I made you some brownies! why wouldn’t I?”

; “when I kiss you it’s hard for me to stop.”

; “I love you with my heart baby.”

; “don’t get jealous baby you own my heart, I’m all yours.”

; “I wanna marry you already. I want a house, a dog, a weird grocery list, everything baby.”

; “why are you staring at me, huh beautiful?”

; “You’re really cute when you’re nervous.”

; “I’ll be over in five with pizza. Sound good?”

Jeongin

; “I’m so proud of everything you do lovely!”

; “proceed with caution you might burn down the kitchen.”

; “You’re literally my dream girl.”

; “I was just thinking about you— and our future.”

; “the thought of us kissing won’t leave my head-“

; “I miss you, call me?”

; “You’re cute.. we should be cute together!”

; “stay called me a peach.. do you think I’m a peach lovely?”

; “I don’t care what you wear, you’re beautiful either way.”

; “there she is— the girl of my dreams.”

; “I wanna be your every thought, every second of the day.”

; “I text you when I miss you.. which is all the time.”

; “can I tell you something? don’t freak out.— I love you.”

; “Sorry im busy! I’m discussing future wedding plans with your mom!”

; “you hungry lovely?— scratch that I know you’re always hungry, let’s go to that cafe down the street.”

; “send me videos of you— why would I want nudes? — no send me videos of you being silly and singing!”

; “I’m glad I met you too, you’re the best thing to happen to me.”

[impactrueno]

(From Twitter) I think ppl still have a right to be more comfortable with Musical BJ and or Toon BJ than with Movie BJ. No one is trying to say that either Beetlejuice is a good person. We know they’re all bad. Some ppl are just more comfortable with one than the other and that’s just their preference.

And while you said the green card thing didn’t originate in the musical it still rubs me the wrong way that movie BJ stalked and obsessed over Lydia all the way into her adulthood as she grew up when he maybe could have just found another ADULT woman to get the green card.

Most of us find more comfor in musical BJ and or Toon BJ because they both seem more relatable and we are able to see ourselves within them. Especially musical BJ. A lot of ppl relate to and find comfort musical BJ because he struggles with similar issues we do.

Those being mommy/daddy issues, depression, anxiety, being neurodivergent,

(it’s not necessarily canon explicitly within the musical but let’s be honest there is no neurotypical explanation for musical BJ’s mannerisms/behaviors/pos)

abandonment issues/extreme fear of abandonment and being alone, and just wanting to be/feel loved and desired by someone after feeling invisible, othered, ostracized, unloved, and unseen by everyone around you, including by the ppl who are supposed to love and care about you and accept you and your flaws. And I think the same could maybe even be said for toon BJ too tho I’m still in the process of watching the cartoon and i didn’t get to certain episodes yet tho I have seen clips.(not to mention him and Lydia being BFFs)

Most ppl agree that musical BJ SA’ing Adam and Barbara plus wanting to marry Lydia, and killing ppl cuz of things not going his way was not a good thing.

Ppl just feel more comfortable with the fact that musical BJ at least wasn’t attracted to Lydia in that way and viewed her as just a friend/pal. Again HE STILL SHOULDNT HAVE DONE IT EITHER WAY but I just hope you understand what I’m trying to say .

While it most likely wasn’t your intent, your most recent thread about you talking about ppl thinking that musical BJ was better than movie BJ kinda came off as you talking down to the ppl who find more comfort in/are more comfortable with musical BJ than they do with movie BJ.

Majority of us aren’t necessarily trying to say that musical BJ is a good person. We just think he’s misunderstood in some areas. Both things can be true. I rlly hope i wasn’t coming off as rude in this message. I just think you could maybe try and see it from another perspective, you know?

i responded on twitter but i'll do it here as well just to make sure (the posts this person is referring to are here and here)

i want to apologize for coming off like i was talking people down. it was not my intent but i can definitely see why it comes off that way.

frankly? i totally get you! cuz i'm the same. i find musical and cartoon bj very comforting and relatable, more so cartoon bj. i know it might not seem like it because i'm always giving him shit lol but beetlejuice (in general) is my absolute favorite character of anything ever.

if you see my replies to ppl when talking about musical bj you'll find that despite what i said in the thread, i completely understand WHY people are more comfortable with him. he's designed to be that way, you ARE supposed to sympathize with him, there's nothing wrong with that!

movie bj is absolutely supposed to rub you the wrong way, even when he's not doing anything. he's an unsettling presence. *this* bj is designed to make you feel creeped out, not sympathize with him like musical bj. this is undeniable

i guess i made that thread as a way to compare the two, how despite everything musical bj did fans are completely endeared to him and why that is. never meant to talk anyone down. hell, i would be talking MYSELF down if that were the case 😭

another thing i should add; i've been getting a lot...a LOOOT of comments recently on my beetlejuice comics so i've been getting a clear view of how people tend to look at one bj or the other, and i often comment on that because fandom sociology is interesting i guess? i'm a nerd

LASTLY (sorry this got long)

a lot of my tweets are my unfiltered stream of consciousness and me talking to myself 💀 and sometimes i don't realize how it might come off to other people. i just yap a lot when i'm doing character studies and i'm subjecting you guys (my twitter followers not here on tumblr) to it SORRY

[sociopathicartist]

This was 100% indulgent by me and not requested (which is why it came out off schedule lol). I know I usually write for classic Sans, but along with Horrortale, Dreamtale is and always has been one of my favorite AUs, so I wanted to write something for Nightmare. Hope you guys enjoy this unexpected work :3

DREAMTALE - Nightmare Romantic Headcanons (indulgent with you as his lover)

Dreamtale is an extremely complex story with extremely complex characters that I have been figuring out for the past several years, trying to get my hands on the most canonical information about Dream and Nightmare and the story itself, especially with how muddled their characters have become within the fandom. If you like the stories where Nightmare is soft and cooing and Dream is a bully and is toxic, then this probably won't be an enjoyable read, but as all of my followers know, I always try my best to stick to how the characters canonically act. I could ramble on and on about this AU in particular and about how misunderstood both Dream and Nightmare are, but that’s something I’d only do if my opinions on it were requested since it would be an extremely long ramble.

The background for these headcanons can be whatever you wish, but just know that behind these it’s implied that you’re being forced to stay with Nightmare (you’re a bit silly like me if you’d ever willingly stay with him.)

DATES / ROMANCE

- While I do love the romantic aspects that Nightmare himself can be implied to have, I mean the setup is perfect for romance (beautiful dark castle, dark, brooding character, etc), I just don’t see him wasting his time being romantic.

- The exception is that he is a manipulator, and will do/say things that don’t seem in character at all for him so that he can win you over and make you believe that somewhere in there he is good and that he can change (it’s never gonna happen, baby), but I don’t see him doing these things without ulterior motives.

- Maybe he’s noticed that you don’t seem to be as keen on him as you usually would be, that his unloving and harsh personality is beginning to take a toll on you and you’re no longer seeking him out as much as you used to, so what better to do than make you think that he, you know, cares?

- Anytime he takes you out on a date to cozy you back up to his side and make you think he cares about you, it’s always with the intention of keeping you on the borderline of hating him and being obsessed with wanting his affection and love.

- Now, that doesn’t mean that the dates aren’t romantic or that they’re horrible dates. Just because I don’t think he’s romantic himself (he’s too selfish IMO) doesn’t mean that he doesn’t know how to do romantic things. After all, if the dates he took you on sucked then you probably wouldn’t fall for him again like you always do.

- Sometimes when he’s hurt your feelings after he threw something at you, or you both got into an argument (good luck), he’ll do something easier, something lower effort to get you out of your bedroom and stop ignoring him and his servants like you have for the past several hours.

- Coffee shops are something he’s learned you like, and of course, there are selfish reasons to it, because he’d be a liar if he said he didn’t love coffee. Cafes and Library dates are almost always his go-to whenever you’re so upset with him that you shut him out completely and lock yourself away in your room. While he doesn’t enjoy said dates very much (he’s fonder of reading new books and coffee, that’s it), he has to do them so that you’ll finally warm up to him again. How else can he keep tearing you down if you’re just always at your lowest? It would make you emotionally numb at some point.

- He did take you to FluffyTale once to where CCINO Sans works (you had no clue what was going on, and when you saw the look on CCINO’s face when he saw Nightmare, you knew it was nothing good). Why he did do that? Not sure. But it happened.

- For more extreme cases where he’s hurt you in a flash of anger (surprisingly he doesn’t do that too much to you, he may be annoyed 24/7 and may be a bitch but he does have good control over his emotions and the backlash for hurting you physically isn’t worth it with the recovery in his opinion), he does more caring things to get you to believe that he’s finally changed, even if just a bit, and that it’s not going to happen again.

- Of course, he doesn’t tell you that he’s sorry, and he doesn’t tell you that he won’t hurt you again. Nightmare never lies, only conceals the truth (canon btw), so you won’t hear mele promises from him. It’s exactly why he has to put more effort into actions sometimes.

- In the extreme case where he has physically hurt you, whether he slammed you against a wall or knocked you down to the ground, he does give you time to gather yourself in your room until you’re ready to come out, unlike how he pesters you when you both just argue. Not only does letting you waller in your self-pity for hours benefit him and his love for feeding off of your negative emotions, but it does give you time to think and calm down, which he needs you to do for him to be able to worm his way back into your mind.

- After being locked away for hours and examining any bruises you got from him when you’re finally ready to come out and find him, he’s gotten you roses (one of the only flowers he doesn’t hate, it matches the aesthetic with his castle.) and has set up a nice dinner with your favorite food, letting you indulge in the rarer evenings that are so nice that they almost let you forget about all of the tears you cried and all of the lingering pain he put you through.

SLOW DAYS

- Nightmare is someone extremely difficult to just relax with and bond with.

- HOWEVER

- His canon personality is not all ‘grrr i hate you grr im gonna beat the shit out of you and kill everyone you love’ because while he does have his moments, don’t think I’m saying he doesn’t, he just isn’t horrible 100% of the time.

- We know for a fact (sourced by Q&A’s and comics from JOKU) that Nightmare does have indulgent hobbies that PassiveNightmare used to have, like how he reads sometimes, and just also sourced from the same things, he isn’t angry a lot of the time. Or… He doesn’t show it. He’s manipulative, he’s extremely smart, and while he is annoyed almost all of the time, it’s not beneficial to his manipulative behaviors to show that 24/7.

- Plus, just because he’s annoyed doesn’t mean the man can’t sit there and relax with a good-ass book and some coffee.

- For whatever reason he’s keeping you locked up in the castle with him (I’m basing the reason off my a03 book with Nightmare, solely because I don't see why else he would bother keeping someone), as long as you don’t sit there and purposefully annoy him as Killer does, he doesn’t care if you want to sit in the same room as him.

- He’s described in books as busy all the time, and granted, I do love love love the idea of Nightmare being all hot doing paperwork at his desk and shit like that, but it just doesn’t make much sense to me. Like… He spreads negativity throughout universes and RARELY ever kills people, is he having to do paperwork over their hurt feelings or something?? This is no diss to those books because I love the concept of it and mmmmmm do I love an overworked Nightmare, but the idea when put into logical retrospect just doesn’t make much sense in my opinion.

- Therefore, since he’s literally been lounging around doing god knows what for 500+ years, I can see him having some boring and uneventful days in the castle.

- Since now you’re in the castle with him, it’s a bit easier to help pass the time with his ‘lover’ (he hates that word since he doesn’t and CANT love and hates any boyfriend/girlfriend label, it makes him feel too humane and in touch).

- You might just wake up and look for him after being served breakfast in your room like always, finding out that he’s in the castle today from one of his servants, and it’s always a straight shot guess of where he is.

- He doesn’t spend too much time in his bedroom. It’s a place that he only associates with sleep and changing clothes, and since he doesn’t need sleep to live, he just never really goes in there. You most likely won’t find him lurking in his bedroom at all.

- But the next best place where you can always find him is in his study or the library. Whenever he has the free time, you can’t recall seeing him without some sort of book in his hand. Sometimes he breaks free of the old habit and decides to write or drink some coffee while watching the rain pour down outside through his study window, but that isn’t as often.

- Surprisingly, he doesn’t typically turn down your company. Perhaps it’s for his selfish entertainment, or maybe he just finds you intriguing to talk to (I’d hope he did after going through the effort to kidnap you and keep you kidnapped), but if he notices you strolling into his study, still in your pajamas and sleepy from just waking up, he simply just has one of the servants outside the study room bring you some coffee or tea to drink while you sit down next to him to see what he’s reading.

BONDING / CONVERSATIONS

- In no means am I saying that Nightmare isn’t abusive, he is and would be in any sort of relationship (we see this firsthand with him and Ccino sans.), but he’s not too estranged to just conversate with.

- Usually, lazy days when he’s just staying in the castle and isn’t in a completely horrible and stressed mood are the days where you can talk with him best, like normal people.

- Sometimes he’ll tell you about the book he’s reading, and go into a long explanation about the entire story and plot without any pauses or breaks, just talking mindlessly to pass the time.

- Other times he tells you about the missions he’s planning on doing or has done, which he only tells you about because unless you’re on a date together, you never leave the castle. And even when on dates, you’re always stuck by his side and under his constant supervision, so there’s never any chance for you to blabber to anyone about what he tells you or for you to run.

- It was a huge shock to you at first with how conservative he can be, and how he can just talk and also listen in a normal, back-and-forth conversation, sometimes about absolutely nothing. You’d just never expect it from him, but even though he does not care about or love you by any means (just like how it is impossible for Dream to hate, it’s also impossible for Nightmare to love), if he’s kidnapped you in the castle to keep you as a romantic partner for some reason, he has some level of interest or obsession with you, so he’s more keen to just talking like normal with you compared to talking to other people, like Killer for one.

- As for bonding, most of your bonding is just during already discussed and elaborated lazy days around the castle or dates that only happened because he hurt you and needs you to warm up to him again. While you can fall in love and be as cooing to him as you’d like, Nightmare doesn’t experience the bonding you do since he doesn’t feel love. He views quality time as a way to learn more about his fixation on you.

LIVING IN THE CASTLE

(last one for now!! i could just KEEEEP writing about this, but i wanna save it for other headcanons with him in the future.)

- You live a pretty lavish life in the castle, I’m ngl.

- I’ve said it SOSOSO many times, and I’m gonna say it again, Nightmare is extremely manipulative. Thus, he allows your every need in the castle to be taken care of and makes sure that your bedroom is just the way you like it, and that you have anything you could want there.

- Having you be so comfortable in the castle and enjoy your life there makes it indefinitely easier for Nightmare to tear your little heart into pieces. It’s so easy to do when your upset mood is constantly distracted by how good of a life you have there (mostly, save for Nightmare being a bitch) and it just makes it easier for him to hurt your feelings and feed off your negative emotions.

- To elaborate, if you lived a horrible life in the castle and he kept you locked away in some dungeon cell without any freedom to roam the castle, kept you in the same clothes you showed up in, and only gave you water and bread crusts for dinner, it would be very difficult to prevent you from going emotionally numb.

- There’s only so much distress one can take before shutting down, and if he wants to keep hurting you over and over again, it would be very hard to do so when you’re always at your lowest due to your living conditions in the castle.

- Having you live a lavish life with all the physical comforts (except his LMFAO) you could want keeps your mood boosted easier, and allows you to recover quicker from his emotional abuse. When you easily go back to being happy and forgiving him due to your luxury of being able to take walks in the garden by yourself, take a hot bath, and drink some nice tea, it only makes it to where he has to do less work to manipulate your emotions. He can do all of the cheering up indirectly (other than taking you out on dates when he’s super super mean to you) and just let himself indulge in the privilege of hurting you again.

- So, yeah. When it comes to living in the castle you’re pretty much set up for life, living like basically royalty. The only difficult part that always tears you down to earth is whenever Nightmare decides to mess you up again.

There's my short ramble!

I said short, this was a long headcanon list, but it’s short to me when I compare it with how much more I could have written. I’m on a dreamtale crave right now since it has been one of my favorite au’s for a long time, and writing my a03 book with nightmare and dream has sparked the writing love for it again, so if anyone wants any requests for dream and nightmare I will take those up asap along with my others!

Thanks for reading!!

NIGHTMARE AND DREAMTALE BELONG TO JOKUBLOG!!

[stranger-rants]

I’m not sure how coherent this will be, but as an aromantic asexual who is romance repulsed due to trauma I have very complicated feelings about characters who feel like they are inherently unlovable. Yes, it’s very sad that they feel that way in the context that they’re in but also I feel the same way about myself in many ways. I don’t particularly view myself as lovable and I have conditioned myself to fully accept abandonment as the ultimate outcome of any relationship I have. It’s happened to me numerous times in my friendships as I know I will never be anyone’s first priority. Whoever they love romantically will be their first priority.

That’s how things go, ‘understandably.’

I know that because of the amatonormative society we live in that aromantic asexual people especially don’t have great support systems. In many ways, society forces partnerships onto us as a requirement to just… live. When you don’t have that, it’s very hard to do things as an unpartnered aromantic asexual person especially if you’re disabled or chronically ill. I don’t need anyone to try to prove me wrong or to console me over this. I am chronically ill. I have aging parents who won’t be able to take care of me forever. Even then they’re responsible for the majority of my trauma. I have no one who will consistently be there for me when they’re gone. It is what it is.

…umm… but I say this because even if someone feels like they’re unlovable, they still deserve to be treated with dignity. They shouldn’t need a romantic relationship to “save them.” They shouldn’t have to learn to be loved before they get access to support systems and support systems shouldn’t be exclusively available in the form of romantic relationships. Of course not every aromantic asexual person is traumatized in this way nor is everyone traumatized in this way aromantic asexual, but we both share in a common struggle and it’s not just that individual people abandon us but society abandons us… over and over.

Yeah, sometimes I do want characters I like to be loved by someone and grow within a relationship. At the same time, I think it’s valuable to show characters who feel unlovable that their survival matters despite that. They don’t need to be lovable to live their lives and maybe we acknowledge that not being able to get what they need to survive is not a personal failing due to their lack of lovability but a structural one wherein people who can’t form romantic partnerships are regularly ignored by society. So many abused kids especially are told that love will fix them but so often that’s an excuse to just punish those of us who can’t experience that easily or at all.

[psycheofaphaggot]

we’re opening the floodgates people because the only thing i think about ever, and what i WILL shout from the top of every rooftop i come across

DINA IS THE PERFECT WOMAN.

i don’t care. i don’t care what anyone else says. i don’t care if your opinion is different because you’re wrong.

she’s witty, she smart, she’s incredibly fucking kind, patient, and yet so strong willed and never not willing to speak her thoughts even when she’s unbelievably scared. she’s so perfect it hurts honestly.

one of the things that breaks me the most about dina and ellie’s dynamic throughout the entirety of part 2 is dina’s part in it all. her, irrevocably in love with one of her closest friends, JUST after finally confessing to one another officially is suddenly thrust into a WAR where she can only be a bystander. ignoring the whole pregnancy thing, just that is fucking insane.

and she handles it with the utmost care and patience. moreso than honestly anyone around her deserved (not that these characters didn’t deserve kindness).

i could go in depth about how much i believe ellie williams is one of the best representations of PTSD in modern media today but as much as seeing that breaks me, watching dina deal alongside her is infinitely worse. ellie is a character who has just lost her entire world basically, only a few years after seemingly losing her purpose for being alive at all. with no closure. she’s sad, she’s angry, she’s broken, she feels essentially unloveable.

and dina treats her with the gentleness of a morning breeze. you know the thing thats like “character who feels unloveable and the other character who loves them like its breathing”? yeah.

dina is patient, kind, stable. she is exactly the thing that ellie needs. she never blames ellie for her outbursts, she never insinuates that ellie should get over her emotions faster, and even better she doesn’t even treat ellie like glass that could shatter at any moment. she just loves her. in the easiest way one could possibly be loved.

and its hard. it’s difficult and they both go through an unbelievable amount of trauma together and yet they still come out on top. they’re still able to build the semblance of a life together in the ashes of what they’ve lost.

as someone who identifies a lot of myself in ellie. everything about their love and how they love each other does nothing but break me apart. its so full of hope yet so layered in nothing but destruction. it really is the worst kind of despair. especially because of their end. all of that work and just the existence of trauma is what throws it back in her face.

i am not the most eloquent person. im sure my thoughts are jumbled and insane and hard to understand when i write them out like this. but there are so many aspects of this games that are so fucking admirable. naughty dog found a way to tell a tragic story full of people. not good people, not bad people. just humans, and the world would devolve into when pushed to the absolute edge. and even before that. it is a story of the human race at its most raw.

and its heartbreaking. its enjoyable, its sadistic, its humorous and it’s absolutely gut wrenching. its beautiful.

this series will probably never not be my favorite game ever. i will scream about it and look like a crazy person, and i will keep finding more and more things to love about it.

but this is a ramble when its really supposed to be a dina appreciation post. i love her. everyone should love her. she’s such an amazing person and i think about her constantly. i hope that wherever she ended up, her and JJ live the happiest and most fulfilling life they can.

[thebluestbluewords]

Anything You Like - the soulmate theology part

*

“They’re a gift from God,” Claudine says confidently. “He sends them to us so we know where to find the good people in the world. The ones who are meant for us, for us to love and learn from. That’s why so many parents will mark their children.” 

“That’s stupid,” says Mal, who is eight years old, and has exactly two soulmarks, one from her mother and one from her future-henchman in training, Jafar’s son. “My mom’s the worst of the worst. She’d never let some silly god tell her who to mark.” 

Claudine glares at Mal from behind her thick glasses. The effect is a bit like being glared at by an especially nervous monkey, one of the creepy ones with huge eyes who sometimes come on TV in the hours-long marathons they get of the stupidest children’s shows imaginable. 

With all of the fury in her six-year-old body, Claudine sticks her tongue out at Mal. “Then you’re stupid, and so’s your mom!” 

“My mom could crush you dad like a bug.” Mal says carelessly. “And probably his god too, if he’s wasting his time giving people soulmarks. My dad’s the most powerful god on the island, and he doesn’t have any soulmarks.” 

“That’s because nobody loves him!” Claudine says, full of confidence in her own correctness in a way that only children can be. Mal would punch her teeth in, if she thought she could get away with it. “If God made somebody to care about your dad, he’d have found them by now and you wouldn’t even be here.” 

“Take it back!” 

“No!” 

“Take it back right now or I’m gonna hit you!” Mal shouts, clenching her hands into fists so tight that she can feel the tiny points of her nails start to cut into her palms. “My dad’s the most powerful god on the isle and he’s gonna hurt you if you don’t take it back!” 

Claudine frowns, screwing up her whole face. “My God can protect me,” she says, but they’re a shadow of doubt to her words now, and Mal knows that she can win this. “He’s the most powerful of all time, not just here.” 

Mal, with the honing instincts of a child who has never been told to shut up, goes for blood. 

“Then why don’t you have a soulmark? If your god is so powerful and cool and loves you so much, why didn’t he make anyone who loves you back?” 

“I—“ Claudine sputters, face crumpling behind her glasses. “I— I, um, I’m waiting. For the right person.” 

Mal frowns. She’s more evil when she pretends to care about people first, that’s what her mom says. “I thought your god was supposed to show you the right person. If he didn’t give you anyone, I think it means you’re just an unlovable freak.” 

“You’re mean,” Claudine whispers, her face damp behind the shield of her glasses. “I’m gonna find my person someday, and you’re never gonna get any more soulmarks because you’re mean and  God hates you.” 

Mal laughs. “There’s no god on the island, stupid. Your dad just lies to you because he doesn’t want anyone to know that you’re a freak.” 

Claudine sniffles. “You’re mean and that’s worse.” 

Mal takes a step back. Crying is disgusting and only for babies, and at eight years old, she’s very much not a baby, and being seen with someone who’s crying could hurt her burgeoning schoolyard reputation. Making someone cry because you hit them is one thing, but standing next to someone who’s crying is a sign of weakness, and there’s no space in Mal’s world for acting weak. 

“Says who?” she demands, from a safe distance away. Bullying distance is further than comforting distance, and it should be clear enough to any onlookers which one she’s standing at. 

“My— my dad,” Claudine manages, sucking in an enormous snotty breath. “And all his followers. Being mean is the worst thing ever, that’s what they said.” 

Mal laughs wickedly. Or at least, close to wickedly. She’s still practicing her Evil Laughs. “Well, my mom says that being mean is how you get ahead in the world. And my mom’s the ruler of the isle, and yours is dead, so I’m pretty sure I know better than you.”

[toxicpineapple]

v3 scar headcanons

pondering the orb that is the v3 cast and scars. this is obviously going to be triggering though for a multitude of reasons so i’m gonna slap a big ol abuse/self harm/torture trigger warning on here and then drop everything below the cut. proceed with an abundance of caution :3

shuichi saihara i’m probably far from the only person who headcanons shuichi as having had a history of self harm. i think a lot of people really reduce and water down shuichi’s character to “guy with anxiety and depression” but it’s a very longstanding and personal headcanon to me. i think he has largely gotten over it by the time he attends hope’s peak, but still has the occasional relapse. scars mostly on the inner thigh and wrists.

hoshi ryoma ryoma, i don’t believe has much of a history of personal injury (and injuries he likely got in tennis mostly didn’t leave any scars) but i think he has old scars from cat scratches and bites over the years. also some nicks across his arms and abdomen from various scuffs in prison, mostly onesided; ryoma’s not the kind of guy who fights back, not really.

gonta gokuhara this dude grew up in the woods so you know he’s got all kinds of gnarly scars on his torso and legs. claw marks, bite marks, maybe something on his head from a particularly sharp rock. they’re his reminders of his time growing up with his forest family and i think while gonta doesn’t necessarily experience much of a feeling of “pride” around them, he isn’t ashamed of them either.

kiibo robot. skip

korekiyo shinguuji korekiyo is an abuse victim. i am reasonably confident about this stance. i think on the whole the abuse that korekiyo faced from his sister was psychological or coercive, mostly because his sister was bedridden, but i could see him having a scar or two from that time. what really would’ve stuck with this dude physically is his wack ass backstory-- this guy has undergone some crazy shit for his research, including torture which i won’t get into for obvious reasons, but like. yeah that’s gonna leave a mark. i also am of the opinion that the bandages on his arms cover scars that he created himself, not as a form of self harm but rather for like, blood sacrifice for rituals and stuff? but i did indeed borrow that hc from my brother soo.

kaito momota i think kaito has scars all over his knuckles from splitting them during fights. i don’t think he’s the violent hard hitter the fandom characterises him as, but i do think kaito struggles to articulate his anger, and that can turn into lashing out. especially if someone is being unreasonable or cruel to someone he cares about. so, scars on his knuckles. he might have other scars from similar fights, but kaito strikes me as the kind of guy to go in fists blazing, he definitely doesn’t fight with weapons if he can avoid it. the only other notable scar i hc him as having is a thin scar on his temple from the car crash that killed his parents when he was eight.

kokichi ouma so i’m actually one of the few people who doesn’t necessarily hc that kokichi grew up in an orphanage, i like the hc and i do use it from time to time but i read kokichi as a foster care kid. going from houses where he either had to bodily escape punishment or cause trouble just to get a bit of attention. dice being other members of the system/kids who were also as forgotten and unloved. all this to say i do find it extremely plausible that kokichi could’ve had some extent of physical abuse in his past from particularly rough homes-- and as such has some scars from that time. other scars he received through Shenanigans.

rantaro amami rantaro travels a lot, and talks about all his wack ass adventures and near-death experiences-- not to mention that it is canon in utdp that he will sometimes return home with a concealed injury. as such i think rantaro is pretty scarred up like gonta, primarily around the torso/abdomen area, but he has a few assorted scars on his legs, and a bunch of marks on his hands. my friend jim and i share the hc that he has scars that encircle both of his wrists from a kidnapping incident when he was eleven.

kaede akamatsu bit more of a normal one, palate cleanser, kaede lived a relatively mellow life. any scars she has are probably just from skinned knees and stuff-- EXCEPT for a large scar on her knee from a bike accident as a kid. ouch girl.

angie yonaga angie comes from an island where blood donation is a pretty common practice, so she probably has a few marks on her arms from the procedure. given that i don’t know much else about polynesian culture and angie’s writing is pretty disrespectful as is, i think it’s probably better if i just leave it there as far as any scars she could have gotten in a ritualistic sense. i will say that angie spaces out when she does art, so she might have some scars from accidents caused while working-- she does work with a chisel after all.

miu iruma given that miu was in a car accident that put her in a coma, she probably has a fair amount of scarring all over her body. abrasions, and also burn scars aren’t out of the question. miu is a pretty reckless inventor too so hard to believe she wouldn’t have picked up a nick or two working on her silly little things.

tsumugi shirogane tsumugi sews, but needle pinpricks don’t really leave scarring as long as ur not going fucking crazy with it. i think the vast majority of tsumugi’s injuries would come in from her time working as a bartender. broken glass is pretty nasty, and people probably would’ve gotten into at least the occasional fight. maybe a little scratch on her cheek from a conflict that didn’t get defused before things started flying. tsumugi wishes her scars were cooler, but they are, as she is, quite plain.

himiko yumeno she has an appendix scar on her tummy and a few on her knees from tripping. pretty normal life though.

tenko chabashira hey why don’t we ever talk about the fact that tenko is literally a vigilante? i think that’s a pretty relevant detail of her character that nobody talks about. she’s probably witnessed a bunch of violent crime, and from a very young age, too... i think tenko has probably gathered her fair share of scars, largely on her hands, but some on her shoulders, face, and legs. she’s tough though! she looks on her scars with pride, memories of the times she’s been able to keep girls safe.

kirumi toujou as a competent maid, occasions where kirumi actually gets injured in her work are pretty rare. she’s an overworker though, so i think she might’ve pushed herself far enough to cut herself a few times while cooking. on the more dangerous side of her work, i definitely think kirumi is the type of person to endanger herself in the name of her duty, so scars from various murder attempts-- knife, gun, whatever-- are definitely not out of the question. maybe even a knife wound on the back... but kirumi walked it off. she is a maid, after all.

maki harukawa the obvious answer here is that maki is scarred all over and honestly FUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK drs for pretending like that’s not true. in her training to become an assassin maki was tortured repeatedly, using a variety of methods, in order to toughen her skin and make it so that she could withstand great pain. i have a hard time believing there is a lot of maki’s body that isn’t scarred. aside from the scars from her training, i’m sure maki has also collected a fair amount of scarring from missions and such. oh girl.

[suusoh]

Your characterization of Anna is exactly what i was hoping for tbh. She would never have Johan’s “no lives matter” approach because even at her kindest, when she was not the monster in the normal timeline, it was never about what people deserve with her. She doesn’t forgive Johan cause everyone deserves to live and be forgiven or whatever, her personal philosophy is never impersonal. She forgives him because he is her brother. Because she loves him and she’d forgive him again and again. A sweet sentiment and also so very “selfish”. Monster Anna would not be Johan’s impersonal, god-like, judging humanity as a whole kind of creature. She’d be a selfish and angry thing. Johan’s dishes out punishment detached but Anna would be so very attached that it’d be horrifying. She’s hunting you down like she’s the cat and you’re the mouse. Philosophy and morality mean little to her because she makes her own personal brand of justice and she is aware she has biases and she does not care in the slightest. Exactly as you said, she gets to choose now.

I imagine Johann’s self sacrificial nature would piss her off to no end cause, imagine her resenting her brother yet also caring about him and yet he’s so eager to sacrifice himself for everyone else. It doesn’t matter that he’d do it for her too. In her eyes she’s the only one he should be doing it for. The gall of him to not understand that his sole responsibility is to her. Yet again him being concerned with humanity as a whole (while still obvi she is the center of his pathology and the catalyst of his behavior) and her being concerned with the humans in her little world. They’re foils to each other especially in the scale of what and who they consider when referring to the world.

oh anon..... you are speaking my language right now. we are talking and conversing in the same tongue. dios mio!!! this is everything!! Like I don't know else to add to this other than:

thank you. yes. yes. yes yes yes yes. johan's lack of morality in a detached way and anna's lack of morality in an attached way SUPER FUCKING YES. she is the cat and you are the mouse oh my godddddd.

aboslutely does pissh er off. I think this is where my take kinda diverges though because for me she has one hell of a cain complex, and she would literally cut off all ties and existence of her connected with her brother. literally like "brother?? what brother. I don't have one. nope." meanwhile johan is literally like (;-;). But your takes super neat though too nonnie!

I give anna a "wanting to seperate from her brother" thing because in the anime that's what protected her brain from the memories and her trauma. Sad to say but she was literally living her best life when she didn't even know about Johan FHKLAHJFA so I think that's why anna is trying to emulate that. A life where she has no brother and no mother, therefore she is not the twin that was given away because she is not a twin, she has no twin she is just anna!! there's no one else, just anna.

(Just Monika.

ok.

hehehhe)

WHICH might tie in to her trauma of being the "least favourite" twin because now you don't have to choose between her and her brother. what brother? She has no brother You can just choose her and only her, she's who you should be choosing anyway.

which is actually why i think that maybe Anna might be using "Nina" as a fake name to furhter separate herself from him throughout the alternate monster au. Just like how Johan uses "Johan" because he has no name, Anna uses "Nina" because she does have a name, but she does NOT want anything to do with it. She is Nina, Not Anna, because Anna is a girl with a brother and a mother. and being Anna hurts because that brother and mother left her all alone and unloved and had to face a special little place called red rose mansion and kinderheim all by herself.

(girlie really said "you are not me and i am most definitely NOT you" gtfo outta my face LMAOOOO 😭)

Which would make the conflict of alternate monster au reconciling the fact that she has a brother, she has a past tied to him, and she has to face the fact that she can't just erase all the unpleasant memories, things, or people in life to stay happy or make the world a "happy place".

If monster is all about Johan and Nina, twins who are irreversably connected with each other and having to face the fact that they can be two different individuals with their own two lives and different personalities and are not "halves" of one person, but instead are two whole people with their own identities and with their own lives.

Then alternate monster is all about Anna and Johann, two different people with two very different lives and diff identities, having to come to terms and to face their past that they are in fact once siblings, a fact that further cannot be denied with them being twins and undeniably looking like the other, and that they may be more similar and connected in each other's lives and past than they want to admit to themselves

[lost-wishing-official]

can u give us a quick overview of the vocaloids’ personalities? :o

YES I WOULD LOVE TO

it got really long so i’m putting the yap under the cut

miku

miku is an uncanny valley abomination in the most affectionate way i can say that. she cares for the lostwishing members, you can tell, but she is blunt and persistent at best and downright unnerving any other time. she can see right through lies, and will call them out instantly. miku is a machine, but she doesn’t even try to appear human to make you more comfortable. you have to wallow in the discomfort.

rin

rin is the sentient manifestation of anger. she cares, but the only way she knows to get those cares across is through yelling and violence. if any of the lostwishing members (especially kumo) have been upset recently, she is the vocaloid who it manifests in. she smashes windows with rocks to try and release her anger, but often ends up taking it out on others instead — whether it be the other loids or the lostwishing members. however, she won’t ever hurt them unless it’s to keep them safe from danger.

len

i’ll admit i don’t know len as well as i know most of the loids, as he belongs to a friend of mine — len is extremely fearful, and more often than not this manifests in him becoming avoidant or lashing out to keep everyone away. there’s another large aspect to len that i won’t give away yet, so that’s all you get for now.

luka

OHOHO luka is my absolute FAVORITE.

luka.. luka doesn’t arrive for a while in the lostwishing story (think niikai.) and when she does, she is easily the scariest. standing at ten feet tall, with one eye replaced by a flower with petals made of bird feathers, she is an eerie sight you’d expect to see in a horror movie. luka represents everything that went wrong in kumo’s life. i could talk for hours about her design and the thought into the choices, but you asked for personalities.

luka is very motherly to the lostwishing members, but half of the group fears her so badly that she often just wanders. she hides away so as to not scare anyone else, but when met with the same love she gives, she is happier than ever. luka was born from kumo’s desire for a mother’s love, yet he is the one to reject her — she struggles to find purpose, but hopes that he will eventually come around. she is easily the calmest member, and often tends to the younger loids like they’re her children.

luka is the manifestation of love and loss, and her desire is to mend the very wounds she was formed embodying.

meiko

meiko is a lot like miku, except she craves the presence of the lostwishing members. she wants to be near them, and she likes to talk to them — though she’s not very good at having normal conversations. she often will push a topic until she gets the full truth, even if the person doesn’t know it’s the truth at the time. she is cold, but not uncaring nor is she unloving. she just is very bad at expressing it.

kaito

lostwishing kaito is probably the least uncanny of them, though he’s still a bit eerie. he wants to help guide the members and to let them heal, but he often catches flack from rin for being too lenient. he’s very kind and patient, trying his best to comfort the members of lostwishing.

[adaines-furious-feast]

I know nobody cares but this can’t live in my head

I have an OC. I’ve never had an OC for a fandom before but this is maybe the best character I’ve ever made so I thought I’d share her here because I have nowhere else to share here. 

Dottie Cruller. This is long. I’m sorry.

Dottie, or Doughrethy Cruller, is the daughter of Lady Donetta’s younger brother. She is a person shaped doughnut. Her parents both died in a boating accident when she was six and she was adopted by her aunt and uncle – mostly because they couldn’t get her aunt’s inheritance if they abandoned her.

Dottie is 15 at the beginning of the campaign. She is a bard with a love for history and really learning about the politics of the world. Her favourite question is “how would everyone react to this”. So her bardic inspiration comes in the form of “remember in xyz battle when this thing happened”. She’s the kind of nerd that really admires the cool kids, so she really likes the princesses, but she also asks for plausible deniability when they’re up to something because Queen Caramelinda is her favourite person. She gets an acceptance from the queen that she doesn’t get from her aunt and uncle.

Dottie is disabled. She needs a walking stick and has chronic pain. It’s really a role of the dice at the start of every day as to whether that’s going to limit her movement or not.  

The original idea or trope I was playing on for Dottie was the “we must sacrifice someone pure and innocent to succeed” kind of thing. It dates back to Ancient Greece and is still used today. But what if that sweet innocent sacrifice had the strongest will to live?

I have mentally played the whole ACOC campaign with her which I know is not how this works but I tell myself stories to get to sleep and this is one of them.

So Dottie starts the campaign with very low self-esteem, mostly because she is frequently reminded that she is not part of the royal family and if she doesn’t make herself useful she will be thrown out. But as, first, her bardic inspiration is useful during the ambush – her uncle tells her explicitly to stay in the carriage but that doesn’t happen – and then in Comida where her understanding of the political map of the world comes in useful she starts to get more confident.  

She is also... very good at lying. Because she’s always thinking about what other people think, so she’s great at masking. That and she grew up in close proximity to the best liar in Candia, though didn’t realise his biggest lie until too late.  

So after the tournament, she makes a show of going to the Cathedral to pray partially because she does believe in the Bulb and wants protection, and partially because she knows how this will look to people. After her truly miraculous survival in the Cathedral ambush, she does multi-class as a cleric, though not a healer. Dottie is all about trying to understand the world and her place in it.

Dottie believes she is unlovable. Not only to her aunt and uncle – her aunt has never been cruel to her, but she’s never been loving either – but to anybody. And especially to the Bulb. Because when you’re six years old and your parents are both killed in an accident, you’re told that the Bulb needed angels, the Bulb needed them close to it, they’re in the loving embrace of the Bulb. But when you were also in that accident, and didn’t die... well, doesn’t that mean that the Bulb doesn’t love you? You’re not even good enough for the Bulb. And while, when she was six and sitting after her parents’ funeral pondering this, a very nice citrus yellow lady told her that wasn’t the case and she was lovable, that fear always been internalized in her. Then, after battle after battle where she really should have died, but didn’t, it feels more and more like not even the Bulb loves her.

Dottie’s birthday takes place during the trip back to Castle Candy, and is forgotten by everybody. Which is understandable given, you know, a war just broke out. And she doesn’t mind too much. But a Sweet Sixteen has got to be important in Candia. So when she gets back, and finds in her chambers a box with a label wishing her a happy birthday in what looks like Queen Caramelinda’s handwriting, she’s so sure this is a good thing. Except for the watersteel razor blades under the box lid. She doesn’t die, but is unable to cast magic until someone else uses a staff gifted to her by Captain Chedder – for saving the life of a cheese sailor – to do a greater restoration.  

After Jet’s funeral, Caramelinda reminds her quite bluntly that Dottie’s not her daughter. A conversation with Jack is the first time since her parent’s funeral that she’s said aloud that the Bulb doesn’t love her. At this point, Dottie doesn’t know if her aunt is alive or not. She’s assuming the worst because everything else is the worst. At that moment, her entire family is dead. The only family she has by law is an uncle who is a traitor and has told her for the past 10 years she doesn’t matter and the royal family will just throw her away. And while her head knows that’s wrong, she’s now wondering if maybe he knew more than she did. She knows the Rocks are hurting, but now she’s wondering if maybe she doesn’t matter as much as she thought she did after all.

When it comes to Saccarina, Dottie doesn’t immediately flip to her side, but given she feels distant to the Rocks and is trained to be a political advisor, she happily sees a role for herself beside the new queen and accepts her as the queen. Dottie also doesn’t feel like she would stand out as being “broken” in Saccarina’s court. It wasn’t that the Rocks were abelist, but she didn’t see people like her there. She does in Saccarina’s marudas. However, Dottie doesn’t spend much time with Saccarina, as she’s captured in Buzzybrook. She’s unable to move fast enough to get back to the portal.

She finds out that her uncle has told everyone that she was kidnapped by the Rocks, and he is very worried about her. She begs Grissini not to take her back there, and actually manages to win him over when she saves his life during an ambush that is quickly foiled, but there’s not much he can do. At Castle Candy, Calroy plays the role of worried guardian for all of five minutes, long enough for Grissini to leave, before placing Dottie in the care of the church, where she’ll be an assurance for them that he plays his part of the bargain.  

Dottie has not spent the past 10 years learning how important it is to be two faced to fail on the final exam. She dutifully plays the part, and actually manages to get the nuns fooled long enough to catch some gossip, that her uncle may be trying to sweeten the deal – no pun intended – with a certain gluten-filled emperor with a marriage. Dottie considers going along with it. She hasn’t heard anything about Saccarina in this time and for all she knows they’re all dead. Being close to the emperor wouldn’t necessarily be a bad thing. She sends a Sending spell to Grissini, disguised as a prayer to the Bulb, asking for advice. His advice comes on the night of the siege on Castle Candy, before the Rocks troops have been spotted, when he comes into the tent where she is being held and tells her in no uncertain terms that this would be terrible and while that loaf of bread is a war hero he would be a terrible person to have to spend any amount of time with.

Dottie wouldn’t play a major role in the siege. She is one person – two with Grissini. But she does take Grissini out of the fight against the Rocks, so that’s good. The only grudge she really has at this point is against her fucking uncle, but confronting him doesn’t go so well and he manages to escape. At least until the King finds him.

This is the first time Dottie learns about Cinnamon, and is horrified. She becomes even more horrified when she learns about how Cinnamon got so big, mostly because this is going to be pretty hard to smooth over politically. But Dottie still pledges herself to Saccarina after the battle. The Queen is going to needs someone who knows how to sweet talk people and, while she doesn’t intend to be quite as deceitful as her uncle, she learned how to be manipulative from the best. If you’re going to upend an entire religious system, you’re going to need someone who knows how to talk good.  

Does Dottie ever get over her belief that she is unlovable? Yes, because Grissini shows her that isn’t true. He is the first fatherly figure she has had since she was six and, even though she’s almost an adult now, she welcomes having that fatherly figure in her life.  

She also gets the title of Marquesa of Muffinfield when her aunt is found dead (whether the wound is self inflicted literally or just metaphorically is never determined). It’s something that Dottie held at great importance after the escape from the castle because she was not going to let her fucking uncle take her birthright. That anger at him was the only thing that kept her going.

Anyway, that’s Dottie. Nobody has read this long, I know, but if someone has, I hope you like it. I love her, she’s the best character I’ve ever written. I love the idea of having a character who is every part the trope of “innocent sacrifice” who keeps living and is convinced that god hates her because she keeps living. I also love Grissini’s character, and mourn the alternate universe where he ends up an ally, because I think it could have happened.

[leviosatothestars]

Hi hi!! Sorry I’ve been MIA for quite some time 😅 I’ve been dealing with a lot of personal shit, went on vacation, and I’m back to work. My birthday’s coming up and I’m turning 21 this year so that’s also been taking my time and energy.

But…I am trying to make time to focus on my writing this summer so I don’t just drop this fanfic I’ve been working on since 2020 and have put a lot of time, research, and effort into. And because it’s Pride month(!!!!), I have decided to share some info about certain characters in my fanfic 😁

So, I am well aware I have not finished introducing my OC’s, but I figure now is a better time than never to let you all in on certain OCs of my sexualities and pronouns :)

Starting with…

Eileithyia Knight!

Thyia uses she/her pronouns and is pansexual. She was assigned female at birth. Thyia focuses more on her platonic friendships and academics rather than pursuing romantic affairs, however when she has crushes (or fancies someone), she’s more so attracted to someone’s intelligence, morals, and heart & soul than physical features. She doesn’t care if someone’s physically attractive, all that matters to her is that the person is kind hearted and does right by their loved ones. While she says she doesn’t have a preference or a “type” she definitely does and that’s completely okay! Pansexuals can have a preference and type! :)

Celia Knight!

Celia uses she/her pronouns and was assigned female at birth. She’s straight, but doesn’t shy away from platonically flirting with all of her friends because she never wants anyone to feel unloved.

It’s no surprise that the sister of Eileithyia ‘Thyia’ Knight is an ally, or at least it shouldn’t be, especially when you look at how she was raised and who her friends are. At the end of the day, all Celia cares about is that her friends and sister know they’re loved and feel comfortable being their true, authentic selves around her. Celia would 100% go to pride events and help do her friends’ makeup looks for said events. While she is known for her docile and down to earth manner, she would 1000% cast hexes at anyone who uses slurs or bullies anyone that’s queer. She isn’t afraid of being handed a detention for standing up for what she believes in.

Aelia Knight the Second!

Aelia identifies as bisexual and demisexual and uses she/they pronouns because she thinks gender is a societal construct. Aelia was assigned female at birth. She has a preference for one person and one person only, however that does not neglect the fact that she has thought of others and been romantically and sex^@lly attracted to other people too.

Aelia ‘Aels’ tends to keep to herself and has always liked it that way. Growing up, she was surrounded by the rambunctious Weasley clan and a metamorphmagus- it’s truly no surprise Aelia just wants some peace and quiet for once. The only solace she found growing up surrounded by so many kids around her age were the (somewhat) chiller ones: Charlie Weasley, Tonks, Percy Weasley, and Oliver Wood. They had a special bond with all four of them and through her friendship with them, she was able to feel comfortable exploring her identity during her time at Hogwarts. Aels had always kind of known she wasn’t straight, having had a small crush on Penelope Clearwater before realizing Penelope and Percy were in the talking stages of a relationship. Penelope was one of the few friends Aelia chose to make early on in their time at Hogwarts (as well as Adrian Pucey) and as Percy and Penelope became closer, so did Aelia and Penelope. Aelia hasn’t had many crushes or strong romantic feelings towards many people, aside from a certain Quidditch player, and doesn’t mind that. If that certain Quidditch player wasn’t in the picture, they wouldn’t feel incomplete or like they’re missing something.

Amalia Knight!

Amalia identifies as queer and uses she/her pronouns. She was also assigned female at birth.

Amalia honestly doesnt care to put more of a label on herself than queer. There isn’t a particular reason, she just feels that the term fits her sexual identity best. Amalia has had more platonic crushes than romantic or otherwise and has had a platonic crush on almost all of her closest friends. The only thing Amalia knows for certain is that she has a male preference and would do anything to support her friends and sister and she’s perfectly okay this way.

A/N: There’s something so special and significant about showing how being queer looks different for everyone. One person who identifies as bi could have the exact opposite personality as someone else who identifies as bi and I think that should be explored more. Not every person who identifies as bi or pan or whatever really has the same character/personality traits or fits into the mold of what the stereotype of their sexuality is. One of the reasons why most of my main OCs are queer is because I want to raise more awareness for the LGBTQ+ community and write characters that identify as such that are uniquely their own while breaking down stereotypes or misunderstandings about these identities. Just because, for example, Aelia has only had one true romantic relationship and it’s with a male, does not mean her identifying as bisexual is any less valid. Just because Amalia identifies as queer and has a male preference does not make her any less valid either.

[buggie-hagen]

Sermon for Fifteenth Sunday after Pentecost (9/1/24)

Primary Text | James 1:14-27

-----------------------------------------

Dear People of God, Through James, the Lord urges us to “be doers of the word and not merely hearers” (Jas. 1:22). This is written as a guard against hypocrisy. In all my time as a pastor, and before, perhaps the greatest charge against the Church of Jesus Christ is the charge of hypocrisy. They don’t go to church or believe and follow the commands of God because they see people who openly profess to be Christians—who are terrible people. Christian love is seen by the public to be conditional. A ruse. In the public arena, Christians are seen as loudmouthed, full of hate and bigotry. People who are unloving. Unkind. Self-righteous. Self-interested. Stubborn. A people unwilling to admit their wrongs. Perhaps on our lips are holy words and talk of God. But our actions belie what is actually in our hearts—sin, anger, moral filth and wickedness. Do we have the one true God? Then our actions will reflect that. God has planted the word in your hearts, dear people. Receive with humility the word that has been planted in you. Then, be doers of that word. Necessarily, this will mean love of your neighbor. We must be quick to listen. Plant your ears on the mouth of your neighbor. Truly hear what your neighbor says. How they are. Who they are. What they need. We must also be slow to speak. Let us not be so speedy to share our own opinion. Let us truly listen to others. And speak kindly when we do. Prioritize the words and needs of our neighbor before our own words and needs. Let us also be slow to anger. The anger within us does not serve God. The anger we hold is not righteous—it is a black mold in the heart. Anger causes us to serve ourselves—which is not the way of Christ our Lord. So put away anger, and be patient, do not hold another accountable for their every single fault. Instead love freely and unconditionally—in word and deed.

The epistle of James talks about worthless religion. In the letter he speaks harsh truths. He says, “If any think they are religious and do not bridle their tongues but deceive themselves, their religion is worthless” (Jas. 1:26). If we say we believe in God but do nothing that God would have us do, then our faith does us no good. There is no advantage then. So we keep a bridle on our tongues. (think like a horse’s bridle). That is, we restrain the words that come out of our mouths—not saying everything we want to. And as James says, Let no evil talk come from you. Speaking ill of others, pointing out their faults, especially when they’re not there to defend themselves, is a great evil. Luther explains the Eighth Commandment, when it comes to how we speak of our neighbors, that, “we are to come to their defense, speak well of them, and interpret everything they do in the best possible light.” Everything we say about another person ought to be said about them in the best possible light. None of this slander or gossip. Next James writes, “Religion that is pure and undefiled before God, the Father, is this: to care for orphans and widows in their distress, and to keep oneself unstained by the world” (Jas. 1:27). As Christians, to be doers of the word, and not simply hearers of the word, is to take care of the vulnerable. To look out for the less fortunate. We think it is okay that we leave this for others to do. But no, we ourselves ought to be found among the poor and needy—ministering to their needs. Luther says, “If you do not find yourself among the needy and the poor, where the Gospels shows us Christ, then you may know that your faith is not right, and that you have not yet tasted of Christ’s good-will and work for you.” Now the old creature in us hates taking care of the vulnerable and the needy. It says, “How come I have to help these other people? They aren’t doing anything for me!” “Let them take care of themselves. No one helped me and I’m just fine.” “Why must we help this person, they’ll surely take advantage.” Dear people, these are words of the devil. He is a murderer, and he hopes that we will neglect the poor. That we will come up with some excuse, and that our vulnerable will die of hunger or heat or neglect.

So far we have heard the law—the word of God that judges and condemns each of us. Now hear the gospel—the word of God which gives us birth, which brings new life. Philip Yancey once said, “I rejected the church for a time because I found so little grace there. I returned because I found grace nowhere else.” For all the faults of the Church, it is and still remains the Church of Jesus Christ. The gates of hell cannot overcome it. Nor can we. We have the promise that wherever the gospel is preached and the sacraments are administered according to that gospel—there is God’s one holy, Christian people—forgiven in Jesus Christ. The grace of God is not found outside this holy Christian people. God has placed the on our lips. Such as when we confess in the Creed, “I believe in…the forgiveness of sins.” God’s forgiveness is here because Jesus Christ is here in his word. In fulfillment of God’s purposes, you have been given new birth through the “word of truth.” That word creates your faith anew over and over. Everyday you are renewed in the gift of your baptism. It is God himself who will keep you unstained by this world. Jesus Christ, the word made flesh, lives in your heart. This faith creates new impulses, so that your faith cannot remain idle—it trusts God so much that it will give its life a thousand times to God, constantly loving God and neighbor, the poor and the vulnerable, without reservation. A faith that loves both friend and foe. Speaking well of all. As Christ has loved you. Dear people, God’s love for you in Jesus Christ can never be exhausted. It is not by compulsion that we share God’s love in word and deed. It is not pressure that comes from fear. We are doers of the word out of gratitude for all that Christ has done for us in his suffering death and rising from the dead. We do the word, and not just hear the word, freely, spontaneously, and with merry hearts.

[tentacledtherapist]

Lisa,

Perhaps the 'your' goes unspoken? (I, too, am teasing you!)

The "Wild West" is such a bizarre concept, as someone deeply into history, the actual "Wild West" was such a short lived thing, but to be fair, still took up a decent chunk of our country's history (considering it is only about 250 years old so about 1/5 of the time spent as a legitimate country). I have (distant, estranged) family out in the South West, which to me is the only place the Wild West still sort of lives on. The Gold Rush itself is such a strange cultural clash in and of itself. Both eras really feel like a gross misrepresentation of what they were actually like, but also such a huge part of American Heritage. (You can blame old Westerns for that!) Having one of the little towns in the East is definitely weird, especially since its literally the New England Area. This place is a frigid wasteland, so seeing the cold sand and empty fake western town makes it feel REALLY haunted. On days where it functions normally it's still a fun little attraction (weirdly themed mini golf included) but if I could visit it when its closed, I would, just to explore it a little more in depth. (It doesn't help someone actually got shot for real there, but thats another story.)

I agree about your tastes, I enjoy things that delve into the human psyche, the human nature, especially darker aspects, but even more so the light within the darker aspects. One of my favorite things are the Ethical Vampire or the Ethical Werewolf conundrums. The idea that your darkness, a darkness normally hidden within humans, is forced to the forefront and in a nearly uncontrollable manner. And having someone love you regardless, these raw things that traditionally humans and society have told you are inherently evil and wrong or sick are, not necessarily okay, but are not unlovable. There is such a beauty in that. And even if it doesn't surround a love story, the individuals will to stay strong and protect their morals and their humanity...? Its beautiful.

I also love the Friendly Ghost dynamic as well, it pairs well with death and the maiden, but it has more to it to me than that. Its that continuation of love and caring after death. Where passing on was maybe wholly possible but the ghost's love of humanity keeps them around. Or even just a ghost, a powerless thing, desperately trying to help those who cannot be helped. The idea of a bystander who wants nothing more than to tell you it is okay but cannot speak a word? I love that.

- (Your) Creature

P.s.: I would bap you back but tumblr won't let me put an image in the ask :(

🐈‍⬛🐾🐾🐾

creech,

i can totally blame old westerns for the romanticization of that whole era. every other street or building in my town is named for some western movie star and there’s museums for them everywhere? it’s a little overwhelming if you’re not used to it. every older person in town sort of Worships these movie stars and the culture of ‘The Wild West.’ like,,, we live in suburbia. there is nothing wild here. your house has a white picket fence and you get freaked out at a Chicken. and all this is ignoring the whitewashing of ‘the wild west’ but that’s a whole different thing that i’m sure you’re aware of—

i like new england, though. maybe my perspective is skewed ‘cause i’ve only visited and never lived there long term, but i like the older styles of architecture that’s a lot of places, and i like the (relative) abundance of public transport? and i’m perpetually Warm so the concept of living somewhere cooler long term is appealing, i guess? the desert of the west coast and the humidity of the southeast are both Sweltering

anyway,

i think the little weird finds are always the most fun? even if they’re creepy in the off season. we have christmas and winter themed parks here and they’re really weird to see in 125 degree heat in the middle of summer too? though… i don’t know if anyone got shot at any of those places—

as for the ‘tropes’ you brought up:

yes yes yes yes yes!!!!

ethical darkness, ethical inhumanity, all of it is such a fantastic way to explore what really is humanity! it’s not exactly an example of the trope, but i read this book last year that was about cannibalism? which is a great start to this tangent— anyway, it was About Cannibalism, but really it was more about how connection to others is inherently going to cause damage to the other, but to go without connection will cause destruction of the self? humans can’t exist with others without rubbing up against each other in all the wrong ways at times, and so often we give up parts to fit with the people we want to keep with us? the connection sustains us and we take those parts of other people and use them to help us grow? if you’ve ever adopted some silly turn of phrase a friend says frequently, isn’t that just a form of consumption of them?

but, to deprive yourself of that connection because you don’t want to hurt anyone, because you can’t stand the darkness and the mistakes and the inevitable hurt that comes from being a human and taking parts of others, you just turn that urge inwards and end up cannibalizing yourself?

again, not exactly the perfect fit for that trope, but one i found fascinating and kept revisiting.

the book was called “bones and all” and i highly recommend it if you can stomach some really visceral descriptions of cannibalism and stuff. i think they made the book into a movie somewhat recently, but it has an actor i don’t really love in it so i haven’t seen it

- Your Lisa

[gladionfan]

PLEASEEEE forgive me if im not doing this right. i really mean it when i tell you that i dont know what im doing hahaha

i’m so sorry i read this and then without thinking immediately went on a gladion rant . FORGIVE ME. i get excited he is my favorite guy.

HI!!! im so happy a couple of you like my analysis because i care so much about this guy. i also need to push him down the stairs. having an album of animators work is so real. i especially like the one that confirms gladion is a naturally talented skater it makes me laugh. i’ll have to look up the account because i have the artist saved but can’t name him off the top of my head!

the shot of him in the snow is i think from “a night of a thousand poses” or “full force pose at the sleepover”. i’m guessing because it’s been awhile but usually when my friends send me a gladion screenshot i can tell them the episode and scene correctly. i believe the context is lillie feels unloved by lusamine and while burnet comforts her there’s a cut to lusamine in her office and it’s one of the tiny pictures on the wall! their first family photo is there too.

i like to think of him as a short person because he has the vibe and also because i think hau and lillie get taller and i think this would annoy him.

random fun fact which i think is entertaining; gladion doesn’t appear in person till episode 27, but some people count his appearance in the episode where lillie first hatches her vulpix, since he was in the little family photo on her desk. he’s only visible for like 5 seconds the whole episode though lol

gladion is really important to me in a lot of ways i think. started writing why but i can’t or i’ll go on a 300000 word tangent. it’s been 8 years now and every year i celebrate his birthday. i have the kind of love for gladion where i’ll be sitting struggling to finish my computer science work and the gladion in my head will tell me that failure is necessary for success and that even when things are lonely in hard i have to keep trying and i, alone in my empty room, shake my head and think “wow gladion… you’re so right”. gladion is a recurring character in my brain. for 2 years (this youtuber must hate me) i have visited his pokemon masters voice notes video. i emailed dena about his sygna suit to the point where i stopped because i felt bad for bothering the team. his sygna suit made me unable to function for several days. i have his poster. i have his anime appearances documented and should probably lend help to the wiki but i’ve been stalling. i got into mbti for 4 days in order to type gladion then changed lillie’s profile pic and his on pdb then left. i love lillie and mohn by default. i love lusamine as a character i have complicated feelings about her. ok i accidentally went on a tangent anyway. just anyone who knows me knows i love him.

i love talking about gladion merchandise!!!! i own a couple of his pins, his deck box, his poster, some stickers, and am trying to get my hands on everything else but as a student it’s kinda hard 😭 especially when you don’t live in japan and have to pay overseas shipping. the aether family had a merch line a long time ago! but the merch is kinda rare and hard to get your hands on [leans in cupping my mouth with a hand like i’m telling a secret] i’m usually a crazy person and don’t tell people about all his merchandise because i’m convinced i will somehow single-handedly raise the prices but gladion would tell me gatekeeping is wrong so here’s what gladion got in the aether family line.

THIS art! card sleeves! deck box! his deck box is cool i love it. poster! dialogue stickers! normal sticker! acrylic stand!

sticker! hand towel for some reason. imagine you’re crying and i shuffle in my bag and you’re like “ohh. they’re handing me a handkerchief” and you look at it . No. it’s gladion and silvady

the sticker art got a clear file also and it’s also on his deck box. he’s in this awesome card sleeve, probably my favorite sleeve pokemon has ever made, upside down. oh both of these artworks are can badges also

here is another can badge that he got! so sicko mode.: he got several postcards!

and there’s my personal favorite of his paper theater. it’s sooooo coolllllll. ok sorry for yapping. he has a lot of cards also but this post is too long and my phones laggginnhgg. oh he also got those little deck box separators which are pretty cool! and silvally has at least 3 figures :) which i count as gladion merchandise. i might be missing one but i can think of 3!

OH AND HE HAS A TOTE BAG! AND A NOTEBOOK! tote bag is pretty rare though

some of my thoughts on gladion’s design :) and gladion because my friends are always being forced to listen to my essays and i journey through the mountains explaining his lore to whoever will listen