#especially to things they think they dont need to

[softness-and-shattering]

I think both can be true, but arent always both true.

I read a lot, and had a ton of fun reading and writing, and also I had unknown unmedicated adhd and the stories I was absorbing and telling kept me happy and stimulated throughout boring classes and empty time and not having a ton of friends. And when youre so deep into a book or movie or whatever, that is a kind of dissociation imo, you do cease to be aware of the world around you in a meaningful way, especially when you look up and youre suddenly starving and its been hours. Im not sure if a "flow state" is a kind of dissociation or a kind of being very present.

For some people it is an escape, and thats not a bad thing. But it doesnt work backwards, not every kid who loves reading is escaping from trauma, sometimes theyre just a kid having fun and it doesbt need to be thought twice about.

And if it isnt harmful to your everyday life, your relationships, your ability to look after yourself, its fine. Theres no need to go looking for trauma under every rock, unless something isnt quite right thats giving you reason to look. Theres no need to project ones own issues onto everyone else who shares that behaviour just because. If youre happy then carry on.

And also, its true that a lot of people are messed up by regular things, unrecognised neurodivergence etc. and it can be healing to see "oh this other person is like me, Im not uniquely broken or some kind of freak". I dont really think anyone gets through life/gets to adulthood completely unscathed so Im not super on board with calling people fakers (which I am not alleging that op has done, im branching into a related discussion), but if its not negatively affecting someone life, or they dont want to look into it or hyper-analyse every aspect of their life, thats totally fine. Its not necessary unless it is. You(general) can absolutely just be someone whos always loved reading and thats all there is to it.

We have GOT to stop pathologizing the joy out of life.

Saw someone claim that if you read a lot as a child, you were disassociating. No, you were reading. Because reading is fun.

"I have a problem with maladaptive daydreaming." It's only maladaptive if it negatively impacts your ability to function in the real world. Laughing at a joke you made in your head isn't doing that.

"You seem to do a lot if creative projects. What are you escaping?" I'm escaping this conversation.

Like what is the end goal? Because so far, all this has done has made it harder to enjoy my hobbies because you're turning a mindless process into something I gotta think about.

[dykedvonte]

You ever just see a Mouthwashing take that makes you want to bang your head into a wall? I literally just saw someone claim Curly couldn't have been emotionally abused by Jimmy before the crash because he was in a higher position of power than Jimmy.

-Shrimp Anon

The mouthwashing fandom has shown me that people genuinely do believe that certain types of abuse are not as detrimental as other types especially when they deem those immune/resistant, ergo, believing one is objectively worse no matter how it affects the person nor the intersections of power, history and dynamics at play.

Get ready cause this is a yap session:

Cause like it's heavily implied that Curly and Jimmy's friendship was toxic and abusive, pointedly in the direction of how Jimmy uses Curly's belief/comfort in him. Curly wasn't forced to enable Jimmy but he was emotional and mentally on edge around him in almost every scene in some way. Mental and emotional abuse are not contingent on what positions you have at work. Yeah, he's Jimmy's boss but he was Jimmy's friend first and it's like getting into Psych discussion to talk about how social power tends to overshadow any perceived organizational power in the human mind. People are concerned about their jobs ofc but they tend to hang onto and put more value/investment into their personal relationships, hence why there tends to be laws and restrictions around mixing the two.

I always see the sentiments that "Curly is a grown ass man", "Curly is bigger than Jimmy", "Curly is Jimmy's boss", "He just needed a backbone" as criticisms of Curly and while I do agree that on the surface level all of these to be true and viable ways Curly could've taken more control of the situation, I often look at the parallels of Anya and Curly as victims of Jimmy pre/post crash.

The way Jimmy talks to Anya post crash is how he talked to Curly in the pre-crash segments. It's hard to pin-point mainly because we know he hates and wants nothing to do with Anya compared to his contrary but similarly handled obsessions with Curly. It's a weird sort of "honey-moon" effect of abuse Jimmy does in terms of emotional and mental victimization. He is always horrid to Anya, always talking down or questioning her abilities and thoughts in a situation, this of course includes the harassment and assault. However, he has a moment of attempted gentleness/conditioning when he question her about the mouthwash when she's contemplating drinking it at the table. The key difference is he has no personal investment in Jimmy outside wanting nothing to do with him, meaning there is no sort of romanticized version of him that he can condition her off of. He knows this, hence, why he always reverts to trying to make her to scared to oppose him.

This sort of give and take of "kindness" doesn't work on her because she knows he is just doing it to take more from her than whatever he could possibly give but it reflects even the "softer" scenes between him and Curly where he always rewords or rephrases Curly's sentiments and concerns to sound more shallow. He is feigning a deeper understanding by reworking Curly's emotions into something bad and needing to be hidden. Everything is laced with envy and resentment, an outburst just around the corner, I mean he even slams the table in the birthday party scene, a tactic in emotional manipulation to set the victim on edge and cloud their ability to respond. Even if Curly knows Jimmy won't get physical in that moment, the physical actions is intended to make him back down in the confrontation in case it does. This is something that is just not person specific. It ingrains itself into how you interact with the world and life and it shows in major and minor ways with Curly.

Post-crash, the abusive nature is more in tandem to the physical victimization Anya went through and the stripping of voice and autonomy we see take place. Like the parasite in HFIM, Jimmy speaks for Curly most of the time and puts words in his mouth, similarly to how he takes Anya's plans as his own. He very commonly, with the both of them mind you, supplements the worst aspects of himself into them; pettiness, selfishness, lack of understanding... And tries to cover himself with their best qualities; kindness, planning, initiative, etc...

These parallel are just to say that positional power has little to do with if a person can be abused and how it can even be flipped to further the abuse. There is no doubt that Curly could've picked up on Jimmy's envy of his position hence another reason he never confronted him as a Captain but as a friend as doing so would immediately put Jimmy in a space to be confrontational/combative.

I think the disdain some people have when they talk about the heavily implied if not implicitly stated emotional/mental abuse Curly experienced being Jimmy's friend is when treating it as an excuse to why he didn't do more. I can understand that completely because it is not an excuse to why he didn't do more but is a very real reason people in his position in these scenarios can experience whether in the context of a work or social environment. However, I also think the way people talk about it really does demonstrate a bigger problem when talking about abuse when somehow who is/was abused is either part of the issue or enabled it.

Harkening back to the sentiments about Curly's inaction regarding Jimmy, I think the exact phrases I used/have seen show how there is an inherent belief that it is easier to overpower the effects of emotional/mental abuse that go in tandem with the perception of Curly as someone who should be able to. There is not an age you suddenly stop being susceptible to abuse nor a set point or low where you realize how it has affected you. You don't suddenly know to stand up or put a face on to face your abuser nor admit that you inadvertently enabled them to subjugate someone else to the same treatment. Maybe it's my psych brain but their is this growing belief that direct action is somehow easy or always the best method with the game shows you instances where it is not always the case. In real life that rings true too. He should have done more, but it's not impossible to see why he struggled to find a way or didn't even if it makes us mad.

It's not easy to suddenly gain a "back-bone". You don't immediately want to resort to aggression, especially if it mirrors the type you were a victim to. You don't want to believe you allowed yourself to be treated this bad, let it get that bad or allowed something bad to happen to someone else. It is easy to be in denial, to retreat to your thoughts or make excuses to avoid the painful truth. It's frustrating but in a way we know is relatable. It why we both hate and love Curly for it. We know we'd be better, we think we'd be better, we like to think we wouldn't falter in the same ways but it's always easier to say that from the outside looking in. It's easy to see what he was doing wrong because we are seeing it, not him, but the game really does make you picture what you would do if this was your raw reality and it's why this debate about Curly seems so never ending/contradictory. We can all say what we'd do but bottom line is that's much different when you're in the moment with all the emotions and human feelings attached.

I personally think Mouthwashing tackles the themes of rape culture, enabling, toxic masculinity, types of abuse and patriarchy in ways that are meant to deconstruct the typical straightforward views we mostly have of these concepts and how little subtilities of them are just as, if not more, detrimental than the overt/obvious parts. The game deals with the idea of little details and bigger picture in a way to show that sometimes the bigger picture is not the issue but the little details that make it up. It's why I have a personal dislike of depictions of Jimmy as the typical horrible person who would of course do something like this because the game is about noticing the little warning signs, the foreshadowing and foresight.

It's why I dislike the typical discussion of "bro code" and "boys will be boys" for the game because the game makes a point to avoid the standard depictions of such. It is about the type of men who still enable despite not condoning, agreeing or even perpetuating harmful beliefs because they can't see the little details or the ways it seeps into their everyday. The severity is not obvious to them as it was not obvious to Curly, Swansea or even Daisuke the way it was to a woman like Anya. There are little details about Jimmy that should ring alarms but if you are too naive like Daisuke, too distant like Swansea or too conditioned like Curly, they are just off markers.

There is 100% more constructive/concise ways to say "Curly was a victim of Jimmy's abuse on an emotional and mental aspect that clouded his judgements and perceptions in the scenario" while also critiquing on the side of "Curly still had a responsibility to protect Anya as a crew mate and Captain that he failed to do due to biases and stigma's he failed to surpass" without the weird condemnation people give him about should've knowing better than to let himself be manipulated by a person he considered a close, if not family/best-friend and had his own reasons to trust initially. Also stop being weird about victims of abuse in general with this fandom, like sorry not everyone has a like social epiphany the moment someone's nasty to them. People are treating it like you immediately know when you are in a toxic relationship immediately or comprehend when a person is actively dangerous and either it's your fault for not knowing how to leave/cut them off or you deserve it. Like the hypocrisy of people believing how certain fans treat the story reflect their irl views but not their own is crazy.

End statement is: I honestly don't even know man, I've been writing this too long and just like no man on that ship was perfect or really helped Anya when it mattered and I feel like pitting them against each other in discussion on who did the least or most or how it was justified sucks cause in the end Anya always did the most and best thing for herself.

[ophanstears]

🍀

I know that Clover's gender is up to interpretation (the devs DID say so themselves) but I still feel weird when people make them exclusively male or female LOL Like it's TECHNICALLY fine??? but it leaves a bad taste in my mouth.

more in tags as usual because I am a yapper. i am so sorry for having strong opinions about gender and representation. i am usually more fun than this 🥲🥲🥲🥲

[skunkes]

biggest downside of not having many experiences or meeting many people is not having anything to feed into the art machine

[fallen--starlight]

hi tumblr user if-you-soul i need to preface this by saying i was actually discussing the god awful mischaracterization this fandom inflicts on HMS with my besties & opened tumblr to look for your reblog of that soul fanart saying "YOU fell for the character's facade that was meant to be dismantled by the viewer!" & got hit w this & it MADE MY DAY. i fucking love this album to death & im a soul fictionkin so these things drive me up a fucking wall

cccc is pretty straightforward while also being purposefully vague & left up to interpretation in many areas but soooo many people take interpretation to twisting the narrative until its no longer what it was & it makes me ask myself did we listen to same tracks here?? where are yall getting these things from???? this got rly fucking long so im adding a cut here voilá

when people talk abt the mischaracterization in the fandom its usually focused on heart & mind so im INSANELY glad to see someone talk abt the soul shit. cause what kinda crack are people on?? he never threatens to harm h&m except for at the end of TSE where he is... having a mental breakdown? have people forgotten what it's like to have a breakdown??? you say shit you dont mean bc you're splitting at the seams & falling apart. there is no point in the entire album where soul is portrayed as manipulative/entitled/evil/violent/abusive/erratic, which are descriptions a surprisingly large amt of ppl seem to subscribe to? HE'S A VICTIM !!!! & im so glad you said it! i too have been in a kind of middleman position to parties fighting with each other & its insanely detrimental to one's mental health & had me at an incredibly low point so yeah TSE feels deeply personal to me & soul's character in general (waves in soul kin again LMAO), drives me bonkers how ppl describe him.

mind WISHES he was unfeeling. heart calling him an automaton freak doesnt mean he doesnt feel! it means that he just PUSHES AWAY & REPRESSES EMOTION, or at least tries to. like one has to really emphasize that everything between the heart acoustic & the soul eclectic has mind clearly displaying rage & bitterness & all kinds of emotions. even the end of TME says "maybe my existence might be by design, a simple fact that he'll refuse to see" like bro says its a maybe & then immediately claims its a fact yall are falling for his facade so hardcore its not even funny atp. the way people treat heart is borderline gross, he is NOT an uwu baby innocent boy that doesnt know anything & ppl infantilize him so much idek why. heart represents emotion- ALL emotions. & you're right! emotions are so fucking draining & exhausting at times, especially if you're mentally ill! all this weird portrayal of evil mind & innocent heart is so ?? can i quote TSE with neither is wrong yet neither is right. all 3 of them are neither good nor evil. they're people. they're human. the album really emphasizes this a lot.

the juno incident & RoE in general is made to be a much bigger deal by the fandom that it really is. applies to more than one thing in cccc but RoE takes the cake tbh. & yeah! whole is an entirely fanon thing lololol like im pretty fucking sure even chonny jash has said this someway or another. what we call whole is literally just...chonny. i think ppl took dream's "when harmonia shines, atlas beholds her" & RAN. & honestly i like whole hcs but this brings me to another thing: i really feel like cccc fans come up with so many hcs & interpretations for the album that they forget what the canon is in favor of their fanon. there's so much shock gore & gore in general for lowkey no reason in here </3 its so much & for what. fanon is awesome like everyone should be free to do whatever but i do wish ppl would Remember Canon a bit more & separate their hcs from it more. along with the gore. where are yall getting all this insane amount of gore & violence from. i feel like any violence alluded to in the album is more metaphorical than it is physical bc emotions can be felt violently. internal violence. the album is abt the never ending cycle of mental illness getting better & then getting bad again & so forth as a natural part of life & accepting yourself in those moments.

tl;dr u r so correct & i couldnt agree more & you've voiced the way i've felt abt this fandom for ages we lost the fucking plot & kept running anyways lets pause & find it again thank you so much for sharing ur yapsesh with us

Mischaracterization in the CCCC fandom: a yapsesh (alternative title: Erm... What the Gore is Going On?)

Hi. Woaw. I'm actually making that post I talked about.

So. One thing I've noticed in the CCCC fandom is this weird fixation on gore, torture, violence, etc. Usually a level of graphic content that makes your average horror flick look... pretty tame!

Don't get me wrong, I enjoy horror! I even think a horror story based around psychological conflict similar to CCCC could work well!

But is it just me, or has this fandom COMPLETELY lost track of what the characters are like in the source material?

Like. Let's be real. Nowhere in the album does Soul do gruesome surgeries on Mind, nowhere does Mind go ripping people to shreds like Doomguy, et cetera. The closest thing we have to an implication of violence is what most of us call the "Juno incident"- as even "tines stabbed through eyes" is clearly a metaphor with the next line: "that the sides have condemned."

Im gonna talk ab the characters themselves under the cut

I feel the biggest victim of this mischaracterization is Soul. In the album he's... kind of a victim, really. He toughs out being dismissed and fought over and pushed aside and outright dehumanized for so, so long. Are we seriously just... going to characterize him based solely on his lowest point in TSE? Spring and a Storm and Mucka Blucka are also songs where he's present- along with his presence in Just Apathy that the fandom seems to outright deny to keep their characterization of him as some violent, abusive monster. (Which, again, is quite literally never alluded to! He's honestly kind of a victim, if anything!)

Ohhkay. Next topic. Mind. Oh boy I have thoughts on how people characterize Mind.

He's not emotionless. If you believe this, you've fallen for his stoic facade. All of his songs are just. So full of so much rage. Maybe even a little bit of grief and sadness and fear, masked by said rage. He isn't some emotionless robot- (Heart calls him an automaton as an insult, but that's another rant.) and honestly it feels like such a disservice to such an interesting character with so much unexplored depth to portray him as such.

Heart. Oh boy. Where do I start. Heart what did they do to you.

Heart is the emotional side, yes, but that isn't just some... smol innocent uwu baby who cries all the time. Emotions aren't small and cute and timid. They're INTENSE and PASSIONATE and EXHAUSTING. Strong emotions leave you so, so drained, good OR bad. This is so much more interesting than portraying him as some "uwu hai dere!!" type of character. Which is nowhere in the album.

Whole is hardly even a character. Soul worshipping and praying to whole is fanon.

This fandom's weird obsession with creating shock gore and one-upping each other in a violence competition has spiraled pretty far out of control, and it's honestly crazy. How do you go from an album about internal conflict to violence that would make even the cast of Resident Evil cringe? Brah.

Final notes uhhh. Soul is a victim who got pushed to his limit, not an evil heartless abuser. Mind is angry and unstable and hurt, not some emotionless robot. Heart is the entire emotional spectrum, not some innocent baby. Ok i . I think that's all. Have a good one

[genderqueerdykes]

hi, im on partially diy hrt for nearly a year. i do not leave in the usa btw.

i buy the drugs from just some guy who deals it, i learned about him from one of my trans male friends, if you want to start diy hrt really consider asking if someone in your community does it also. i live in a country where lgbt+ and transitioning is practically outlawed, but there is still community out there, especially in big cities (over 1m people).

but if he dissapears i turn to resources for cis bodybuilders. idk it's pretty googleable, ive checked. again, always ask people in your country.

check your local laws, where i live buying t illegally isnt punished if the drug is bought from your country (its not contraband) and you do not plan to sell it. in this case if someone IS going to be punished, its your dealer.

for safety: check the ingredients of what's your buying, in the best case you should buy a drug that is the exact same as in drug stores, also ask what other people in your shoes are usually buying.

also if you can - buy in bulk. rn me and my partner have 9 months worth of t on our hands. this way you have more time to find other dealer if yours dissapears, and also it's much cheaper often.

also gel is generally WAY EASIER to buy without a prescription (even though you need it on paper)! many drug stores don't ask for a prescription to buy it, and you can go to multiple of them. also if you preorder it online and only go to the drug store to pick it up they are less likely to ask for the prescription. it's all still not 100%, but at least you don't have to look for a dealer or a bodybuilder website

needles are usually pretty cheap and do not require a prescription in a drug store. if you NEED to make something up why you need them - some of the common pain killers come in the form of injections

so, about the blood tests and stuff like that!

personally, i consult with an endocrinologist approximately onse a year, but i don't have any complications. you can make a visit online with a t friendly endocrinologist from another country - this won't show on any of your medical records and doesn't bare any legal weight. this way they can't write you a prescription, but thos us about diy hrt anyway.

ask about what tests you need to have done beforehand!

you can do all the tests in a private clinic and not tell them anything about your trans status. mostly they don't care. it costs money, but its more safe

but also you can tell some bullshit in the government clinic so they prescribe you some of the tests, at least the most general stuff. if they prescribe you to return with the results or go to an endocrinologist - you can just ignore that and JUST NOT GO. they are most probably very busy and understaffed, they dont care.

you should find a general guide to what levels of what you generally should have. id link what i use, but its all in a language other then english.

generally all of the things should be in the norm, except for testosterone and estradiol. prolactin should be in the norm.

of course it varies a lot and might be different for you if you have other health stuff going on, that's the reason you should consult with a doctor if you can. but it is possible on your own.

i really think people are way too scared of diy t many times. this therapy is often very straightforward, and there ARE ways to do it, you can even consult with a doctor while transitioning illegally. where i live transitioning, whether legal or medical is outlawed, but plenty people do it anyway. be careful and midfull, but go for it

sorry if my english isnt very good, i don't use it irl and its my second language

thank you so much for your help and don't worry, your english is plenty good for this kind of thing! thank you for all the help, if you think of any more information you wish to share feel free to ask!

[hiraethminds]

This is a tangent, I'm here to entertain with needless rambling

The deep rooted hatred for taco I see in the II community genuinely concerns me. Especially since those people tend to be Mephone "apologists"(For lack of a better word, I love Mephone don't get me wrong) despite how taco is the "active" side of the coin to his "passive". The connections between them are there trust me Im connecting the dots. Ive connected them.

I understand that she's done bad things, but blaming her for her shortcomings when she doesn't and never had the same support group to change as Mephone did makes me a little ehh.. Getting upset because Microphone showed her support in the new episodes simply because you don't like the ship(I understand why people wouldnt but thats not an excuse to deny her anything), and because Taco doesn't know how to change yet and you refuse to see her as anything redeemable. I'm not big on shipping, thats not the point of this tangent, but Taco finally having someone to support her and help her change is a GOOD thing. Microphone was being the bigger person there, she was being mature and thoughtful because Taco clearly needs the help. The fact that people continue to deny Taco any kind of growth even if she goes about it in the wrong way makes me deeply uncomfortable. Because the moment any character does anything bad that isn't HER they don't say anything about it. She was shunned by her peers because she was playing the game and continued to 'play the game' so to speak.

Theres a deep rooted hint of misogyny in the way they treat her, but I wont yap about that you dont need to read allat.

I understand people have reasons for not liking characters! That's ok. But I've seen them actively go out of their way to harass people that DO like Taco and actively criticize enjoying her character.

They tend to take it as defending her actions. Which is not what's happening. I don't think oscommunity could handle vriska is all I'm saying.

Feel free to not answer this I just need whatever little imp is telling me to scream about it to get out. go draw a taco dis is driving me crazy

Thank you for dumping this in my inbox bigbarf200, I feel like a wise confidant.

okay so I don't interact/observe with the wider ii community (Mainly cuz i like playing with my touys without being bothered) So this information is so Interesting to me!!!

As you mentioned, the hate might stem from misogyny (and by the way, I’d love to read your essay—talk all you want, my friend!). This is a societal issue that affects every part of life.

That said, I also think some people might dislike her simply because she’s a hustler and stubborn. When she has a goal, she’ll do whatever it takes to achieve it, even if it means crossing into morally gray areas.

holding Mepad hostage > hijacking the show

lying and deceiving objects with good intentions > winning s1

seriously hurting Fan > winning Mic immunity

as you said in the greater scheme of things, she's genuinely done horrible things. But if you just accept that at face value you are missing out on such an amazing character. You have to consider her perspective and the circumstances of her birth (especially in a story like ii!!) to fully understand and come to an option on her. But I digress this is baby level analysis so ill move on.

people who think Mic being friendly towards Taco post e14 is out of character are misunderstanding Microphone as both a character and thematic device I think

that's literally the only rational reason I could think of as to why people would be mad about taco and mic being on good terms???

so yeah, these haters just sound like crazy irrational people who have a lot of pent-up emotions. crazy

anyways ty!!! I feel like I didn't have alot to add since, as stated, these people are just incredibly irrational. but its nice getting an earful of whagh the fuck the community is like. here are soem taco drawings for the occasion

[caplanbuckybarnes]

Celestial Stars & Candy Apple Eyes (Castiel) (Dean)

Request: CanI request a Dean x Reader x Castiel (no Destiel) fic? Reader has been hunting with Sam and Dean for a long time (like since the events of early S1) and met Cas when Dean, Bobby and her went to the Barn (S4 E1). She had a Crush on Dean since the beginning and they kissed right before he died (end of S3) but they never talked about that again after he came back. And when she met Cas, she instantly felt a strong connection and also developed a Crush on him. So now she is conflicted, thinking both dont like her like that (Since Cas is an Angel and Dean doesn't talk about the kiss). The Fic could be right around S6, so Dean was with Lisa for a year which made Reader even more convinced that Dean didnt like her. And Cas hadn't contacted her in a while. But Dean, Sam and Reader started hunting again and called Cas a few times. During their interactions, the two boys realize how they feel and get jealous of the other for being close to Reader (or something like calling her petnames). Idk if all of that makes sense but thats the general Idea I had^^" @storytellers-randomshortstorys

A/N: you'd requested this back in April 2024, and I couldn't for the life of me think of what to do with it. SOrry for the lateness!

Summary: You're torn between man & angel, and cannot handle the jealousy anymore.

WC: 995

Warnings: jealousy, reader loves both dean & Castiel, pining

Read on ao3!

--

The Impala’s engine hummed a low, steady rhythm as the three of you drove through the dark backroads of Ohio. You were wedged in the backseat, your head resting against the window. Dean was behind the wheel, Sam in the passenger seat flipping through a case file.

The silence wasn’t awkward, but it wasn’t entirely comfortable either. You felt it keenly, especially every time you glanced at Dean. Things had been weird since he came back from Hell. Not outright bad, just... unspoken. That kiss before his deal ran out was a moment you couldn’t forget. But he never brought it up after he returned, especially not with Lisa in the picture for a whole year.

And Cas—well, Cas was another layer of confusion entirely. He wasn’t here often, but when he was, you couldn’t help but feel the pull toward him. The two of you had this... connection. Like you understood each other without needing to say much. He wasn’t human, but he made you feel seen in ways no one else did.

“You good back there?” Dean’s voice cut through your thoughts, rough but edged with concern.

“Yeah,” you lied, offering a small smile.

Sam looked back at you over his shoulder. “We should call Cas for this. If that witch really managed to pull off a binding spell like this, we’ll need more firepower.”

Dean grunted in reluctant agreement. “Fine, but he better not be off doing Heaven’s dirty work again.”

You rolled your eyes but stayed quiet. Dean always acted like he didn’t trust Cas, but you knew better. He was just too stubborn to admit he cared about the angel.

Later, at the motel, you all regrouped in the cramped room. Dean called Cas, who appeared with the usual flutter of wings.

“Hello,” Cas said, his gravelly voice sending an involuntary shiver down your spine. His eyes found yours immediately, lingering a beat longer than you expected. “Y/N.”

“Cas,” you replied, unable to stop the smile tugging at your lips.

Dean huffed. “Yeah, yeah, great reunion. You got anything for us, Feathers?”

Cas ignored the jab and got right to work explaining the spell you’d be facing. But as the conversation went on, you noticed something odd. Dean kept glaring at Cas every time the angel spoke directly to you, and Cas—well, he wasn’t much for subtlety. Every time Dean called you sweetheart or kiddo, Cas’s jaw tightened just slightly.

Sam noticed too, of course. He wasn’t oblivious. He shot you a look that said, You seeing this?

You were trying not to.

By the time you were setting up for the hunt that night, the tension was palpable. Dean was unusually snippy, barking orders with more edge than usual. Cas stayed unnervingly silent, only breaking it to answer your questions.

At one point, you felt Dean’s hand on your shoulder as he guided you to a safer position near the abandoned barn. His fingers lingered longer than they should have, and when you looked up at him, his green eyes softened. “Be careful, okay?” he murmured.

Your heart twisted. “I always am.”

From a few feet away, Cas’s eyes bore into the scene. He stepped closer as Dean walked away, his presence like a calm yet electric storm.

“Dean seems... protective of you,” Cas remarked, his voice low.

You shrugged, unsure how to respond. “It’s just Dean being Dean.”

Cas tilted his head, studying you in that way that always made you feel like he was looking straight through to your soul. “I don’t believe that’s all it is. He cares for you. Greatly.”

You froze. “What?”

He stepped closer, his gaze intense but not unkind. “And you care for him. But you also...” His voice faltered, rare for him. “You also care for me.”

Your throat felt dry. “Cas, I—”

Before you could finish, a loud crash from the barn interrupted, followed by Dean shouting for backup. You cursed under your breath and ran toward the noise, Cas right on your heels.

The fight with the witch was chaotic, but you managed to come out mostly unscathed. By the time it was over, the adrenaline had your heart racing.

Dean was pacing, muttering curses under his breath. When he saw you, he rushed over, his hands gripping your arms as he scanned for injuries. “You okay?”

“Yeah, Dean, I’m fine.”

“You sure? Because you scared the hell out of me back there.”

You opened your mouth to respond, but Cas’s voice cut in. “She handled herself well. She always does.”

Dean turned to glare at Cas, his grip on you tightening slightly. “Yeah, I know that, angel. But she’s not bulletproof, is she?”

“And you think I don’t know that?” Cas shot back, stepping closer.

You stepped between them, exasperated. “Guys, seriously? This is not the time.”

They both looked at you, their frustration melting into something softer. Something vulnerable.

Dean sighed, running a hand through his hair. “Look, Y/N. I—I care about you, okay? More than I should, probably. And I know I’ve been a dick about it, but—”

Cas interrupted, his voice calm but firm. “Dean, stop. She doesn’t need your guilt. She needs to know the truth.”

Dean glared at him, but Cas ignored it, turning his full attention to you. “Y/N, I’ve felt this connection with you since the moment we met. I don’t fully understand it, but I know it’s real. And I know you feel it too.”

Your breath hitched. This wasn’t happening. It couldn’t be happening.

“Y/N,” Dean said softly, stepping closer. “I don’t want to screw this up. I care about you. A lot.”

You stared at them, your heart pounding as you tried to process their words.

“I... I need time,” you finally said, your voice trembling. “I care about both of you, but I can’t just... choose like this.”

They both nodded, reluctantly stepping back. The hunt was over, but the battle in your heart had just begun.

[majimaisms]

re: them being textually alienated from their own desires, YES im always saying this and it makes it really tricky to analyze characters' sexualities. theres a whole substory in y0 (mr. libido) where majimas takeaway from it is that he needs to be "more honest with himself about his desires"

but he's referring to the fact that he has no sexual interest in women. he's saying he needs to stop lying to himself and forcing himself into this box because he thinks its what he *should* be doing, because, y'know, that's just what men do. speaking of.

even though he is nothing like this. so what gives? what personal experience are you drawing from here, majima?? of course this is only one possible answer he can give, the other is the one i mentioned in the tags earlier, that men and women can be friends. but the fact remains that this is something you can say as majima.

there's also something to be said about how he consistently abstracts himself out of conversations about sexuality and relationships and men and women. it's all "men like this" "women like that" but it doesn't even occur to him to include himself in the analysis, place himself on the playing field, so to speak. except for some reason when it comes to lumping himself in with men about being "beasts", then it's "us" and "we" suddenly. of course this could just be localization, so i can't say anything for sure, but i still find it interesting

he is very alienated from his sexuality in y0, seemingly ashamed or embarrassed to even talk or think about it, but i think that is precisely what obfuscates the true nature of his desires or lack thereof. there's this huge mental and emotional barrier that he can't look past. and nishitani frees him from that. but instead of clarifying things, it just obfuscates things more. he becomes more confusing. to himself. because now he's just performing it, and in a very exaggerated way, at that. that's just another barrier. and i think a lot of what majima is doing is just avoiding mirrors

i would talk about mad dog here but i have an extensive section on it in the analysis im working on so i won't get into it rn, but yes i do find it absolutely fascinating the dynamics at play when rgg guys are fighting, especially in majima's case because of the performative hypersexuality, and pairing that energy with kiryu who is as asexual as it gets makes for a very compelling and interesting dynamic. it raises more questions than it answers them, and that's what makes it fun to analyze

i will say i do think its somewhat reductive to phrase the question as a binary choice between fighting because they're yearning vs. because they're compelled to, i think "fighting" in rgg games (as lost judgment spells out) is just a way of communication like any other, and an active, conscious choice. and it's not necessarily born out of any internalized notions about how men can express their emotions around each other -- that is to say, even if they hadn't internalized that, there's nothing to suggest they wouldn't be fighting anyway. so i dont think its entirely accurate to treat fighting in rgg as something done in the place of something else, a second-choice, a compromise, something you settle for because the ideal method is inaccessible to you, etc.

TL;DR i dont think majima actually cares about sex all that much if at all

yeah i bet

[croatoancassiel]

i have to rewrite this whole fucking thing bare with me... house s4 spoilers!!!

DUDE THIS SCENEEEE!!!!!! it really shows you how deeply house cares about people. you could argue that he cares for amber by proxy, because wilson is his best friend and amber is wilsons girlfriend, shes also his former employee, but i do think house cares for her outside that too and we only really get to see it when the characters are put in dire situations like these.

house tries to keep up this facade that he could not give a fuck about anyone or anything and he leans into his reputation in the hospital that hes uncaring, but in the end its just?? not true?? he cares in his own fucked up little way, he is fully capable of emotions, he knows when the situation needs a delicate hand or not.

house has never EVER muttered the words "stay with me" not to his patients, not to anyone so when he reassures amber with these words the impact is ten times harder, in that situation amber wasnt a patient or his former employee or whatever she was his friend in need of help. he fights unconsciousness just until amber's wounds are taken care of to the best of his abilities.

AND THE WAY HE REACHES FOR HER????? sure you could argue that hes reaching for the paramedics but i dont think thats the case, time and time again he has disregarded his own health just to figure out what happened that night and how to help amber get better, he sacrificed himself to find a treatment for her i really dont think he gave a shit about himself in that moment, this reaching out was definitely for amber. i mean hes the best diagnostician in the area, he had her whole treatment planned out from the moment he saw the extent of her injuries. either he was trying to get amber back to treat her OR this was the moment he started losing memory?? whatever the case the action of house reaching out to amber had me in shambles IT MAKES ME SICK??

also also all this being said i wanna say the way they tried to imply an affair between house and amber rubbed me the wrong way. i understand it could have been a cover up by house's subconscious but like euhggh i dont think house would ever do such a thing, especially not to wilson

AND HOUSE AND WILSON'S RELATIONSHIP THROUGH THESE COUPLE EPISODES IM SICKKKK!!!!! house was truly doing everything in his power to get amber better, he even apologized when amber died despite it not being his fault and he did anything and everything to keep wilson with him after wilson pushed house away and isolated himself to move on

house's dad's funeral episode got me for that reason..,, wilson does care and house does want him there its not something either of them could push away or ignore they really do need each other and they way they were trying to be there for each other through each the deaths was heartaching THEY CARE THEY REALLY CAREEE!!(!!(!!

anyway sorry i got off track and totally forgot what i said in the original post that tumblr decided i didnt need sniffles..,, house's head and wilson's heart will always kill me im so serious

[majorasnightmare]

the tadpole/brain damage thing. its like. chekovs gun to me. obviously theres very little mechanical support ingame for having a disabling injury, aside from maybe an optional voluntary decision to drop the INT score, but similarly to choosing to write intention into the lack of dark urge Lore responses from the party, i just like to make mountains out of molehills and force game mechanics into In Universe Character Problems

like when dirge repeatedly mentions that he thinks the tadpole is doing something beneficial for him, that its helping him, it isnt JUST the power-hungry psionic ambition in him. its a parasite, that needs a host. it needs a LIVING host, or its own chances of survival plummet. and dirge gets tadpoled right after a life threatening injury to the tadpoles preferred habitat. neither of them want to die!! dirges body tries to recover, but cant in part BECAUSE of the tadpole (the netherese stasis magic rejecting outside influence and binding it to its host, having an unejectable foreign object in the injury site, etc), but its not like the tadpole WANTS its host to have a life altering injury

its not like its malicious (except when it comes to Hive Activity, and then it can be a right bastard), it just cant live any other way. it cant help what it is. halsin calls the illithid life cycle abberant and unnatural, but brood parasitism exists throughout the natural kingdom. is the wasp egg evil for having been laid in a caterpillar?

its first moments of life outside the brine pool, and its new home, its new life, its host, its caregiver, its food supply, is bleeding and dying and falling apart and trying to fix itself but cant and its trying to heal around you but it cant but if it doesnt do anything youll both die, so this larva, this tiny worm of psionic potential and instinct, does what it can. holds its host together with whatever force it can muster, soft gelatinous body (perfect for compreesing flat and squeezing through small orifice openings) keratinizing outside the acidic environment of the brine, its four oral tentacles (its only source of motion and movement when so young and soft, dragging itself along as best it can) made for interweaving with dense synapse clusters to passively absorb the psionic imprint of its host, now desperately intwined with bleeding meat just to try and hold it all together. driven by survival instict and a vessel of psychic potential, forced into passivity by the commands of the Elder, further forced by circumstance to leverage all its great gifts to keep its host standing long enough to eventually eat

my thought is that the reason why dirge still gets the cutscene of the emperor tadpoling him at the beginning of the game, is that the original tadpole orin forced on him is just so weakened and exhausted by months of effort trying to keep him alive through kressas experiments and meddling, that the emperor, currently in thrall to the absolute, feels the need to replace it with a fresher healthier specimen, which then cannibalizes and absorbs the previous one, and then just has to go back to doing the same shit as the last one.

i think that dirges tadpole isnt as twitchy or squirmy as the others because of it. that when omeluum gives him a psychic MRI, the tadpole is just burrowed down and its tendrils stretched like a dense net throughout dirges brain tissue, only moving or writhing occasionally but definitely not as mobile as usual, its web of tendrils especially twisted near dense scar tissue at the back of his head. this worm is already so fucking weird and the circumstances for this mind flayer MRI have already introduced a bajillion different variables that need accounting for, that i dont think omeluum immediately groks the specifics of whats going on but CAN peg the "you have brain damage and your worm is fucking Weird" situation fairly easily. but i dont think it gets enough time in dirges head to get a full understanding of what the tadpole is doing FOR him

cuz like. imo its definitely objectively helping. its a psychic information bank specifically designed to interface with a human brain. the reason why dirge isnt experiencing too many of the side effects of brain damage is because the parasite is doing its best to mitigate them. memory issues, brain fog, disorientation and balancing issues, theyd all be significantly worse without the parasite. when he brings up how he feels its helping him, objectively hes right and its not even the kickass psychic powers hes right about.

like it doesnt cure EVERYTHING, he has chronic migraines that are sensitive to light, and before he asks halsin to make medicine, he starts every morning puking his guts out when the morning sun makes him so nauseous he cant hold dinner down. even without the Urge Nightmares, he has insomnia and just cant meaningfully sleep. but keeping track of what day it is, remembering what happened a few hours ago or the other day, standing up from a sitting position and not immediately wobbling and/or collapsing, retaining his old muscle memory. all shit the parasite is helping with

which is why i cant help but fixate on those moments immediately after defeating the absolute. like oh thats juicy

[thatneoncrisis]

Sorry to keep dragging you through Arcane hell (the new season is... oof) but I am curious what your thoughts on silco are? Realising more and more that silco and sevika are the only part of the show I gave a fuck about and my love of season one was really just those two.

i keep putting things under a readmore so if ppl dont want to see me go "damn this was good i wish it was better" they dont have to

i think silco on paper has potential to be one of my favorite characters on the show, and barring that at least one of the most layered and well crafted. his and vanders dynamic is by no means unique, its very professor x and magneto, which is already something i can take or leave. "oh we were childhood friends and allies fighting for a better future but one of us got soft while the other became hardned and radicalized" the narrative of the terrorist freedom fighter, one corrupted by power is done a Lot bc of a general apprehension in shows like this to endorse violence on the behalf of the oppressed class BUT i think his relationship with jinx was a good addition and if like one or two changes were made it could have been some of the best the show has to offer

for the sake of this post, im going to ignore the reveal that silco knew jinxs mother before her death i think that was dumb and bad. essentially, the show begins with silco and vander at odds- they both are doing what they believe needs to be done in order to secure zauns future, and both of them are ultimatrly hurting zauns people; silco is flooding the streets with shimmer and vander is working with enforcers. silco is primarily motivated by power, but vander is motivated by his love for his kids, this is the only way he has even the slightest assurance that he can keep them from run ins with the law, a law that has a precedent for tossing children in maximum sexurity prisons.

vanders death and silcos subsequent acqusition of jinx flips the coin. there is now something in his life to love, to protect, to care for. he is falling into the same behavior that vander was, even if he is far worse at it bc hes a terrible father whos also a drug lord and just kind of lets his unstable daughter sit in a. ave and build bombs all day. hes not *good* but he *cares* evidenced by him literally needing to be sedated when jinx gets surgery so he didnt flip the fuck out

in a straightforward narrative, this is a story about a man having to choose between his daughter and his passion project. zaun is something he has given his life for, hed do anything to have it succeed... except one thing. that one thing. "there is nothing so undoing as a daughter" is probably one of my favorite lines in the show. i really do wish we had gotten More of them, especially at the beginning when she was a baby and silco doesnt really know what to do with her, which brings me to my next bit-

i think sevika is an indespensible part of the triangle of silco and jinx triangle. i find her position interesting as she is not only second in command, but second to jinx, a literal child. she can be the best right hand man a guy could ask for, she is so dedicated to his cause she betrayed vander, she has given her life and limb for this shit. but she will never be jinx. and i think the conversation of like, how far will silco go before he is forced to choose is kind of awesome. the ultimatum jayce gives him is good it is the breaking point of him trying to do both. he is directly responsible for the "monster" piltover is hunting, he didnt try to keep her in line, he let her do whatever she wanted and he is now directly reaping the consequences. frankly, i think sevika should have been present for that choice in some capacity, eavesdropping or something, so certain that hell make the right choice, its just a girl. and she sees him falter. him not choosing is a choice, he cannot actually make the sacrifices required to get shit done. hed orphan a thousand children to build his utopia, but he cant let go of his girl

anyway all of that was really cool and interesting so you imagine my frustration when his choice is taken from him via jinx flipping out, kidnapping him then shooting him. it was so. anticlimatic. it *feels* like its supposed to be a tragedy, oh she assumes the worst when he was actually going to choose her, but those conclusions feel too. private. like he dies with basically no one knowing he was this close to selling zaun up a river for his girl. i dont think he should have died i think he should have been disgraced for daring to have it all. anyway i think instead of jinx overhearing him talk outloud and coming to the wrong conclusion sevika should have deliberately led her there 1. to piss her off on purpose and 2. prove a point to silco that jinx is unstable and a liability, but not assume shed go far enough to kill him, bc they both still care about him.

overall any of my issues with how his story goes is just a combination of my distaste for that particular archetype, where he is so incredibly comically evil i cannot take a single one of his points seriously even though they Are correct (killmonger. its just killmonger again) and the show just once again not having time for anything with him that is not The Plot. the fondness he has for jinx is apparent i just wish it could COOK longer i wanted MORE, i wanted to see him foster that love of inventing in her, even though it is clearly just because the weapons she makes are helpful to his cause, i want to see her genuinely give input on his ideas, i want to see them talk about vander. his human elements are like too sparse for me to latch on to its like the Idea of them, i go oh i see what you guys are Trying to do. there is too little of him i see him cooing over his daughter then going back to his crack cocaine mines staffed by orphan children and i ask does the show jave anything to say about this cognative dissonance? no? i find it really telling that one chem baron was pissed at the enforcers for her son dying, and yes they were Definitely a factor but WHY DO YOU HAVE YOUR SON WORKING IN THE CRACK COCAINE MINES MAAM. YOU WERE KIND OF ASKING FOR IT. theres no like, conversation about what the corrupting influences of power does to the next generation even when the best of intentions are had. jinx constantly taking shimmer in season 2 for power ups, a direct product of her fathers worst tendancies, and it having NO ill effects on her, shes not reduced to the animalistic state of the drug addicts we are CONSTANTLY seeing on the streets bc. why. is she built different. the metaphor is RIGHT THERE her father/shimmer enable her but they are also killing her from the inside mein GOTT.

also the first time i watched this show i kept confusing him with viktor lol

[bumblebeerror]

I am not a professional researcher. I am an amateur googler.

When I look up something presented as fact, I have a few rules for me to accept that the statement is true:

Ideally, when you search the fact presented, every site that isn’t an ad SHOULD be saying almost the same thing. This isn’t a guarantee - still investigate those sources - but generally this is my first hurdle. Does the search page generally say that fact is true. If nothing seems to agree, there’s a good chance it’s not true.

After that, it’s time to move on to checking the sites saying it, and I have a sort of tierlist for sources. First just look through the presented URLs and determine if they’re majority .com/.net or if they’re .org/.edu.

.com and .net sites are not, generally, proper sources. .com denotes a community, and .net denotes a network. .org and .edu are my bread and butter, because .org denotes an organization and .edu denotes a school. In sources, I would consider this the bare minimum of a source. It’s likely to still be somewhat biased, .orgs especially.

If the thing I’m looking up is news, I want to find at least 6-9 articles from different news sources, .net and .com are acceptable for this so long as you recognize the news outlet (example: CNN, HuffPost). You want this spread because even though these are news orgs, they are biased news orgs. Find an array of sources to help you get a clearer picture of what is actually happening.

However, some sites are more credible because of the organization associated with them - The Mayo Clinic or the Cleveland Clinic are more reliable sources than just any old .org or .edu. This includes recognizable colleges, medical research, etc. Harvard, WHO, CDC, so on. These organizations have a reputation to uphold and are more likely to update or revise old information as needed to uphold that reputation. Just make sure the link actually goes to those orgs.

Wikipedia is not a source for schoolwork, BUT, under each article is a list of sources for the page, and these are generally credible sources. Often they lead to research papers, primary sources, and historical documents. If the thing you’re looking up has a Wikipedia page, check the sources here. Generally, when just fact checking, Wikipedia is good enough so long as the listed sources are legit. They usually are - often each page is independently reviewed by other users who care very deeply about the info being accurate, but just check anyways.

Finally, once you’ve found what you think are credible sources: actually open them up and read them. Dont just trust the headline - especially in news, they are trying to get your attention. Put in the effort and at least skim a few of your chosen sources.

I am becoming aware of the effect a lack of trust in the media has had on people, paired with a dearth of research skills.

[sammygender]

is there any point in the series that sam could have made an escape and actually successfully gotten away from dean and hunting, or do you think that his lack of support system made it impossible

FANTASTIC QUESTION. sorry im gonna ramble for 7374893594 words now

tldr, past like s3 (and certainly past s5) i think its kinda impossible.

early seasons, like 1-2, sure and totally, he almost does, he plans on it. but then the demon deal for his life happens and theyre trapped in cycles forever and ever and everything becomes a lot harder and, also, sam and dean just naturally become more and more codependent, decreasing the chances of them ever being able to have a 'normal relationship', which i think is necessary (dean loosening grip on sam, them having connections outside of each other) for sam to ever 'get away' from dean/hunting (cause otherwise its just an all-or-nothing choice, more on this in a sec).

i think its less so much about sam successfully getting away in terms of getting dean off his back/to leave him alone (which, dont get me wrong, WOULD be hard, especially as the seasons go on, considering dean cant stand to be alone and has extremely controlling and occasionally stalkerish tendencies <3..... but could still certainly be possible), but about him actually choosing to leave dean/hunting (which for the purposes of this question we r equating).

bc its sort of like..... he takes a lot of Breaks especially during mid seasons (s5 after lucifer's set free (tho iirc this one is dean's doing), s7 after dean kills amy, s8 with amelia tho he thinks deans dead, s9 after gadreel possession is revealed....) but he always always comes back. of course s8 is dean Literally Dragging sam back into it (<3) and also just shaking everything up by being generally Alive, but s7 and 9, its cause dean has done something awful thats genuinely shook sam up, and in the end he just... gets over it. cuz what is the alternative? dean doesnt change and rarely apologises!

like its the fact that of course he wants a relationship with dean because deans the closest person in his life and everything to him, but having a relationship with dean equals their intense codependent unhealthy bond, equals dealing with dean's disregard of his autonomy and ignoring it (read: letting it wear him down). dean's all or nothing. they cant just be 'normal brothers'. and i find it extremely hard to see sam ever actually longterm choosing 'no dean' over 'dean who loves him more than anything and will always do anything for him but systematically wears down his personhood and punishes him for percieved disobedience and thinks he's the one who gets to make choices about sam's life'. like he would have to have a bunch of connections outside of dean, they probably both would, and that would never really happen partially because of dean. they can never let anyone else get on their level. like u said. lack of support system!

and its like... what could dean Actually do that would make sam 'cut him off'/distance himself permanently. i literally and truly cannot think of anything. sam canonically has an INCREDIBLE capacity for forgiveness, just in general - where's that jared quote about how sam forgives everyone cause he sees himself as someone so in need of forgiveness - and this even more so applies to dean. dean locks sam up and leaves him to die, kills his friend, tricks sam into letting an angel possess him, and tries to kill him, and none of that makes sam leave dean permanently, not just because dean makes it physically difficult for him to (tho he does - insisting they work together in s7 on the case, going off to get mark of cain in s9) but also cause sam just eventually forgives him and moves on. is it 'capacity for forgiveness' or is it that he doesnt really view bad things that happen to him as a big deal, that (thru s5-esque emotional abuse techniques <3) deans subconsciously gotten him questioning his own reality and opinions so deeply that it just takes time before sam's agreeing with dean again. makes you think!

but tbf (and this is a digression but i just find it interesting) this probably goes both ways too - what could sam actually do to make dean leave him permanently? even when deans incredibly angry at sam he usually wants him around to berate about it <3. exceptions being start of s10 when hes a demon but even demon dean soon switches to sam-obsession.... and s5. which i know according to endverse Wouldve been a permanent split up? which is kind of wild? and canonises that that Couldve Happened i guess. samgirls should do more with endverse, id kill to see an actually good samcentric fic of like. the events leading to endverse. if anyones read any pls pls recs. ANYWAY. theres also ofc s2 meg possession, where dean just fully thinks sam killed people and is like <3 okay baby brothers lets pretend this never happened we got this do u need me to bury a body <3. truly a ride or die. unless ur actively going against Him specifically. things to think about. tell me ur takes.

and anyway then s11 onwards he is NOT getting out. not unless someone really managed to get it into his head Hey So Pro Tip This Is Fucked. sam acquiesces to dean-as-dictator, having literally Let Dean (be about to) Kill him, dean (newly cured from moc) is consequently much more pleased with sam and with their relationship, they fight much less and theres therefore much less prominent emotional abuse etc since dean is at his worst when hes upset. (iirc. late seasons are a blur except for jack stuff.). and by s13 he has a son and maybe if this happened seasons ago dean's treatment of jack would've been enough to prompt at least a temporary split up but it doesnt, it just sparks a few vague arguments between samndean and sam telling jack that dean is trying <3 and that its very difficult for him <3 which is why he told you hed kill you <3 thats just what dean is like you have to get over it at some point <3 (I LOVE S13). so then yeah. too late.

TLDR... he is too indocrinated <3. sad!

[legendary-69420]

MOMENTS-2 (Extras ✨)

(Racing Hearts : VOLUME ?)

A/N : Before you read! Please dont attack me that I Blurred your Idol's Faces I do have a reason and that is to set up my original character If you are a die-hard fan of #Charlos or #lesteppen please ignore the images or skip. The blurred face guy is my OC! Mark Spencer This Is part of my story RACING HEARTS Moments-1 UNSPOKEN CONNECTIONS :

Masterlist : Racing Hearts : VOLUME 1

(Timeperiod : Chapter - 13/14 of VOLUME 1)

Fan Comments:

"I'll sure miss Mark when he leaves."

"Why tf he has to leave… I mean I love Charles' and Carlos' duo, but Mark and Charles were something else." 😢

"I miss his days in Ferrari… can't believe it was only for half a season."

"Dude came for half a season and stole everyone's heart. It's not fair." 💔

"Damn, it would be tough for Charles to let him go. I can already see him missing Mark like crazy." 😞

"I know Charles will miss Mark even though he acts like he hates him. Their connection was so obvious."

"Their friendship was so real. I’ll cry when Mark leaves. Like, they're the definition of what real teammates should be."

"Mark was the breath of fresh air Ferrari didn't know they needed."

"Mark and Charles had such natural chemistry… I can't believe it's already over."

"Mark being in Ferrari for that short time was the best decision. Charles was so much happier around him."

"Whoe thought Mark and Charles would have this kind of bond? I’m still not over them."

*"Can we talk about how soft Charles looks when Mark’s around? Like, he’s *smitten." 🥺

Masterlist : Racing Hearts : VOLUME 2 (Before Chapter 19)

(Timeperiod- Before Chapter 19 of VOLUME 2)

Fan Comments:

"Thank god Mark stayed in F1. I can't imagine the grid without him."

"Hiring Mark in Red Bull was the best decision ever. He’s a game changer." 💥

"I thought they were only friends because they were teammates… turns out I was so wrong." 😭

*"The chemistry between these two is *crazy. Even though they’re on different teams, their bond is so obvious."

"They’ve been through so much together, and you can tell that no matter what team they’re on, they’re always supporting each other."

"I’m just here for their friendship. It’s so wholesome." ❤️

"I swear, every time Mark wins, I get so happy for him… especially when I see Charles supporting him like this."

*"Mark and Charles are the duo. Even when they’re not teammates, they make it work. Legends."* 🏆

"They really proved that being on different teams doesn’t change the bond they share. I love that."

"The way Charles helped Mark with his helmet 😩 so soft, they’re the definition of true friendship."

"Their respect for each other is unreal. I love how they can celebrate each other’s victories despite the rivalry."

"Their fist bump just says it all. No matter what, they’ll always have each other’s backs." ✊

*"Why do they have so much chemistry? Like, they’re literally *rivals* but still act like they’ve been best friends forever."*

(Timeperiod-After Chapter 19)

Fan Comments:

"I can't get over how different Charles looks this season. He’s so much more relaxed and genuinely happy. Mark’s really done wonders for him." ❤️

"That look Charles is giving Mark is everything. You can tell he’s just so happy Mark’s back in Ferrari." 😍

*"Mark being back in Ferrari is everything. You can see how much it means to Charles, and I’m here for it."

"Look at Charles looking at Mark like that. I think the 'just friends' thing is getting harder to believe." 🤭

"I’ve missed seeing Charles this carefree. I’m so glad Mark’s back to help him smile again."

"You can see it in Charles’ eyes. He’s so in love with Mark, and I can’t blame him." 💖

"These two are truly the dream team. Just look at them celebrating together. They deserve all the happiness." 🏆

"The way Charles is just staring at Mark… he’s completely smitten. You can’t hide that kind of love, even with a glance." 😌

"Mark coming back to Ferrari was the best decision. Charles looks like a completely different person—so much happier." 🌟

"I’ve never seen Charles so genuinely happy and relaxed. Mark’s good for him, like really good." 🥰

"Mark and Charles' dynamic is just so different this season. They look so comfortable with each other."

"The way Charles is listening to Mark is so soft. He’s definitely hanging onto every word, and I can’t get enough of it."

"They’re not even trying to hide it anymore. The way Charles looks at Mark is the most obvious thing ever." 💘

"I can’t even imagine how happy these two are now. Mark’s back, and Charles has his smile back."

*"Their chemistry is unreal. I love that they’re not just teammates; they’re *best friends."

"Charles doesn’t even try to hide it. Every glance, every smile—he’s all about Mark."

Fan Comments:

*"Those lingering touches are *everything. You can just feel the chemistry between them through a simple hand on the thigh." 😍

*"Mark's hand on Charles’ thigh… I’m not okay. They’ve got a whole unspoken language between them."*

*"Look at how Charles is staring at Mark's hand on his thigh… like he’s *memorizing* the feeling. Ugh, I’m obsessed."* 💖

"The way Mark rests his hand on Charles’ bum… just… wow. They don’t even try to hide it anymore." 😏

"That hug. You can tell these two are more than just friends. They’re home to each other." 🌙

*"The more I see these little moments, the more I’m convinced these two are *meant* to be."*

"I honestly can’t get over how much they touch each other. It’s like they can’t stop."

*"Can you *feel* the love through these pictures? I swear, these two are so in tune with each other."* 😍

"Look at Charles' face when Mark’s hand is on his thigh. He’s looking at it like it’s the most precious thing in the world."

*"It’s the way Mark holds Charles close, his arms around him like he never wants to let go. *That’s* the kind of love I want to see."*

"Their hands are constantly in contact. It’s like they don’t need to say anything, they just get each other."

*"Those photos are *too* soft. You can see they’re both falling for each other, one touch at a time."* 💓

"When did Mark become this touchy-feely? I’m not complaining, but wow, he really can't keep his hands off Charles, huh?"

"I honestly can't take how intimate these moments are. It's just the little things that show how deep their connection really is."

(These took forever to edit 😭😭😭😭)

Comment and share your thoughts and remarks!!!

Moments-3

[rookinthecrownest]

I think the thing that Gets Me about Veilguard is just how much of an impossible task it had heaped on it from EA from the start of its inception.

It’s arguably supposed to be a soft reboot for the series while ALSO being a follow up to Inquisition. These are two fundamentally incompatible goals in my opinion. This game had to walk the most insane line of any video game in recent memory. I guess EA wanted to have their cake and eat it too.

And the more I think about it the sadder I become for the original team who worked on Joplin. From what I’ve seen of the art book, Joplin was going to be about as firm a sequel to DAI as you could get - with references to rescuing whoever was left in the Fade, having Calpernia and Imshael as companions, having to fight Solas’ agents, etc.

Then EA makes them scrap it for live service. Fine. But wait - now we’re scrapping it again. Back to single person RPG but you also kind of need to distance yourself from the previous games as much as possible while still somehow being a follow up to the previous game.

New setting, few returning companions, and new Big Bads in the form of Elgarnan and Ghilanain to get a clean slate. Any mention of what’s happening in the South (where we spent 3 whole games!) needs to be relegated to letters and codex. ** I dont have the art book yet, so I dont know if these two were supposed to appear in Joplin beside Solas - or if Solas was supposed to be the sole antagonist in that iteration of the game.

But.. I hope you see what I mean when I say this game had a monumentally, borderline impossible task ahead of it. And when I think of it that way, I think it did as good a job as it possibly could. Especially since the actual development time was closer to 3ish yrs to get what we know of as datv today even though it’s been 10 whole years since DAI.

I hope it’s successful enough to get DA5, but who know’s what’ll happen.

I wish everyone except the EA execs who meddled with this game’s development and are seemingly trying to kill dragon age a pleasant day. I have a cynical detective I need to romance 😔