#especially since this might be their biggest novel

[unicornpopcorn14]

Something that lowkey bothered me when I reread Stormbringer was Lippman's introduction.

Asagiri was clearly setting up something with this, and I don't know if I've overlooked something or missed it, but as far as we can tell, nothing catastrophic regarding Lippman was ever mentioned after his death.

And it might be that, a few days after that, the whole Guivre fiasco happened that made the media outlets focus on bigger things, but idk.

It would've been interesting to see the uproar Lippman's death actively caused, how the media would have tied him to the mafia, and the public's opinion about it. Or Verlaine being held accountable after being defeated bcs of it. Or how the European division, the one that Verlaine used to work at, would handle being exposed or outed amongst the other messes that occurred.

Or, more interestingly, having Verlaine spare killing Lippman in opposition to the others because he's aware of this very threat. :)

[vidavalor]

Remembrance of Things Past

Aziraphale's scent-oriented, mindful moments in Good Omens also might be something else as well-- an attempt to circumvent the potential taking of his memories by Heaven. He might be trying to create for the future what are known as madeleine memories or involuntary memories-- the sudden rush of a memory prompted by a certain taste or, especially, by a particular scent.

On Aziraphale trying to get around Heaven by setting up triggers for The Proust Effect under the cut.

I wrote a post awhile back about how I think one of the reasons why Aziraphale keeps a journal is as a way of having something that Crowley can show to him in the event that Heaven takes his memories. While reading something doesn't necessarily trigger a memory itself-- it can but it's not guaranteed-- I think there might be other things they are doing as well that they think might be effective in different ways when it comes to helping Aziraphale retain his memory. The biggest might be actively trying to create for the future what are known as madeleine memories or involuntary memories.

Understanding of involuntary memory? It comes from the extremely Aziraphale intersection of food, the French, literature and psychology...

For anyone who does not already know about involuntary memory:

In 1913, French writer Marcel Proust published the first volume in his 'In Search of Lost Time' series and it contained a passage about the power of memory so descriptive and that resonated with so many that it got scientists to actually study and prove the validity of the connection between scent and memory about which he wrote. Proust had his narrator in the novel describe how, after dipping a lime madeleine into a pot of tea, the scent and taste of eating the madeleine brought him instantly back to a specific time in his youth when his aunt would serve them to him while he was recovering from illness as a boy. He remembered details about her house and their time together, sounds and scenes that had dimmed or been forgotten entirely... all triggered by his mind upon smelling and tasting the specific combination of flavors of the tea-dipped lime madeleine.

Most of us have probably experienced something like this and scientists have since confirmed that it's a very real phenomenon, probably rooted in our need to be able to recognize danger by scent. They have also found that, in some cases and to a slightly lesser degree, hearing specific pieces of music can also bring about a similar sense of memory. Scent, though, remains the best possible trigger for memory.

I can't imagine that after seeing Crowley struggle with his own memory for so long and knowing that it could happen to him, too, that Aziraphale wouldn't be trying everything he could think of to be prepared for the possibility that it might.

In a story that has so much focus on memory-- and in a way that seems to potentially foreshadow that Aziraphale might (temporarily) lose his before the story is over-- there also are scenes that might suggest that Aziraphale's mindful moments might also be an attempt at trying to associate moments with scent in an effort to get around Heaven and retain as much of his memory as he can in the future.

But that's only one part of it... The other part is how he and Crowley are shown to consistently tie times in the present to times in their past.

There are many reasons for doing so and we looked at some of them in other metas but another one might be as a way of trying to connect memories together in a way that, should Aziraphale lose his memories in the future, if one could be triggered with a madeleine memory, then other memories connected to it might follow.

In the first episode, Aziraphale's mindful, sensual eating experience involves breathing in the scent of the sushi with his eyes closed, as if committing it to memory. The evening, as we looked at in the Fish meta, was supposed to be a dinner with Crowley tied to their time in ancient Rome. Breathing in brine and alcohol and salt like Aziraphale is here might also be a way of trying to literally tie these scents to his memories of the scents of oysters and wine in Rome so as to not forget either.

In the parallel to the sushi scene in 1.01, Aziraphale is shown in S2 to breathe in Goldstone's when he and Crowley go there in the present. It's part of the mindful experience for him in the moment but it could also serve as a way of trying to remember the events of both the present and 1941 in the future.

Crowley also breathes in Goldstone's in the present in S2. It's something they both do without even looking at one another in the scene and just kind of know the other is, indicating that this is just a thing they do. Both of them do it instinctively, like the rampant sensualists using elements of mindfulness to work through trauma that they are lol. Aziraphale's eyes are again closed and I would bet that he's as much willing himself to never fully forget his human magic love and 1941 in the future as he is reliving memories of the past.

This scene is a really interesting inclusion because while it's set in our present of S2, it's really about the past and the future. No one has any trouble believing that they're both thinking of 1941 here, even as they're here in the present, and both of them are utilizing techniques both related to the present (mindfulness) to connect with memories of the past (Proust Effect/involuntary memory.) What else might be true as well is that they don't just do this for the past and the present moments but for potential future ones as well.

Then there's this...

There are two scenes-- one in each season-- that focus on Crowley's unsurprisingly amazing scent. While memory wouldn't be the only reason why Crowley would smell great lol, both scenes suggest that Crowley's scent is unique and distinguishable. Sandalphon can smell it as being different from Aziraphale's cologne in S1 and Shax... a paralleling character to Aziraphale, played by the actress who played the character with whom Aziraphale shared a brain in S1... well, Shax is into it. Girl's in a dead faint to a point of straight up huffing him.

While there are others, one reason for this scene, though, could be that it parallels the fact that Aziraphale actually does this sometimes, if in a decidedly less ick way than Shax did lol. Part of why Crowley's been wearing the same, apparently quite appealing, scent for awhile now could be out of an effort to help Aziraphale's mind create enough associations between Crowley's scent and Aziraphale's memories that Crowley himself might be able to trigger some of Aziraphale's memories just by his presence alone.

It's also then interesting-- and potentially a little eerie-- that the only time Aziraphale eats or drinks anything in the present in S2 is when he drinks a few sips of a cup of tea to introduce Muriel to the drink and the custom. This is just after Muriel showed up at the door and failed to recognize Aziraphale, even though he recognized them, in one of several scenes that suggest that Muriel had their memories taken from them at some point. The two characters parallel one another pretty strongly. The difference could well wind up becoming that Aziraphale is able to retain more of his memories because he and Crowley have been working for years to find ways to get around Heaven... and they're using knowledge uncovered by humans to save what they can of Aziraphale's memories.

Or, as Nina would put it:

[nanowrimo]

Tips for Writing When Struggling With Executive Dysfunction

Executive dysfunction can make writing challenging. NaNo participant, August, has some tips on dealing with task initiation and how to keep writing so you can reach your writing goals. Embarking on a writing project is quite the undertaking. After years of sticking to short pieces, I decided to start working on my first novel last NaNoWriMo. However, it felt like I was fighting with my own mind to get things done.

Executive dysfunction is a term used to describe weaknesses in the cognitive process that organizes thoughts and activities, prioritizes tasks, manages time efficiently, and makes decisions. It’s common in certain disorders, such as Depression, ADHD, and autism. Executive function skills are used to establish structures and strategies and to determine the actions required to move a project forward. So for those of us who struggle with executive dysfunction, dedicating ourselves to a project could get quite overwhelming. Here are some little tips and tricks I’ve compiled throughout my experience.

How to start:

Task initiation is one of the biggest struggles when dealing with executive dysfunction. This is especially hard with writing, since you need time to muster the energy needed to jump into your story. Here are some tips:

1. Start a 1-3 minute timer and force yourself to write something, anything, before it ends. The words that come out don’t matter. You can just write, “I don’t know.” The point is to force yourself into the writing zone.

2. Leave bread crumbs for yourself at the end of each writing session to make picking up where you left off easier. For example, stop in the middle of a sentence or thought, so the next time you write you won’t have to tackle something completely new.  You just have to finish that incomplete thought and continue from there. You could also leave some notes about what happens next, cutting down thinking time in your next session.

3. Try free writing. This is a great way to get those creative juices flowing with minimal effort. Free writing alleviates the pressure of writing something good. Spend a few minutes writing about anything, like your day or a frustrated ramble about your story. It’s like a warm up before your writing session.

How to keep going:

So you’ve started your writing session. How do you keep writing? Most importantly, how do you keep working on your project?  When struggling with executive dysfunction, the regular “set a schedule” approach doesn’t tend to work.

1. Scale down your goal if your big, overarching goal for your project is overwhelming. Try changing your goal to something more manageable and short term. For example, try writing 500 words a day. This might make it less likely for you to lose steam half way through.

2. Try writing sprints if daily goals aren’t working. Instead of hitting a certain word count, you’re setting a timer and writing for its entire duration

3. Don’t feel bad for needing external motivation. Will promising yourself a pizza after you hit your goal motivate you to write? By all means, do so. Maybe you just need a friend to ask you if you’ve written at the end of the day. Find out what motivates you.

4. Find a writing buddy. This can be someone who can sit down and write at the same time to hold you accountable. Or it can be a critique partner that expects you to turn in something by a certain deadline.

5. Try something new. This is one of the best ways to combat how constraining and overwhelming your writing might feel. It’s okay to lose interest in your project for awhile and try something new. Unless you’re racing to meet a deadline, you have no obligation to keep working on a project that isn’t working for you. Setting a project aside doesn’t mean giving up on it. You might only need some time away from it before you are able to finish it.

Trying something new could also mean changing where or how you write. Usually write at home? Try a coffee shop. Do you usually type? Try hand writing. It might or might not work for you. But change could be quite refreshing for your mind.

6. Write whenever you can.

Sometimes the urge to write comes while you’re waiting for lunch to heat up, or right before you go to bed. Motivation can be hard to find with executive dysfunction, and designated writing times don’t always work. Have something on hand you can easily pull out to write with to take advantage of these moments. Jotting down a hundred words as you’re waiting for dinner to cool might not seem like much, but it’s still words contributed to your word count.

Some of these tips might work for you. Some might not. Writing successfully is mostly about finding what works and running with it. These are things I found helpful when I embarked on my first novel and I hope it would at least give you some ideas.

Happy writing!

August is a 19 year old self proclaimed nerd and aspiring writer. They are currently taking a gap year after high school and are planning to start their undergraduate psychology degree soon. They have been writing short poetry for two years and recently started work on their first fantasy novel. When not writing, they are busy reading or being a musical theatre enthusiast. Check out some of their writing on Instagram. Photo by Miriam Alonso from Pexels

[bubbipond]

My favorite novel scene is HERE! I have said nothing about Kluer since most non-novel people have seemingly put him as a double agent. So I kept my mouth shut about Kluer as a character thus far. But as I have seen a little criticism I'd like to explain some aspects of the scene between Kluer/Oab and why it is not at all about Kluer's crush on Wan.

Firstly, is the crush a layer of it? Yes, obviously Kluer has gone to minor strides (I won't say great strides because he isn't a villain) to try and get with Wan. But at the end of the day, if Wan doesn't like him back, it is what it is. It will not make or break Kluer and Oab's friendship or Kluer as a character.

However, the point of feeding the beans to Oab is more than his crush on Wan. It's a build-up of all that Kluer has seen regarding Oab and Wan thus far. Through the contest, it is very obvious to Kluer that Oab like Wan and that the feeling is mutual. But at no point have we seen Kleur focus on the fact that he may lose the contest. His winning or losing is ultimately the biggest twist of the knife. Fine, he doesn't get the guy, but he might also not get the restaurant and he probably doesn't need to get to the end to see that happening. It was completely obvious to him that Oab was going to give the restaurant to Wan even though he didn't deserve it. Even though Wan is not a chef nor is he good at cooking (he has come far but he is not a chef).

Keep in mind that in episode 5 when Oab asks Kluer what is he going to do if one of them wins. Kluer said they'd run the shop together. In his mind, the only obvious winner now is him. No one compares to his skill. Especially as someone who has worked years under Oab. Meanwhile, Oab doesn't argue that logic either, and not just because he already slept with Wan. Oab knows Wan is not equipped to be a chef, be a manager, or a waiter? Maybe. But definitely not a chef. So now we have reached the climax for both issues. Wan and his relationship with Oab. Along with Wan and his deal with Methas. Both of which negatively effects Kluer.

So giving Oab that dish was him saying, "I know you and I see where this is going. I know you and I know you aren't being fair. I know you, so I know there is no point in continuing, so here is something you hate to show you I know all of those things."

The other layer is Oab eating the food. He doesn't like beans and he is aware that Kluer knows this. So now we have Oab and Kluer at a standoff. He could push it away and tell Kluer to try again or he could eat it, and if he eats it, that is his answer. It's acknowledging that he sees what Kluer is saying and responding that he has already made a decision on that front. There is no denying it now because it's out in the open. It's been obvious for weeks that Oab treats Wan differently.

And that isn't Kluer's problem with the ordeal. It's one thing if you want him but now he isn't being fair and the contest proves to be a waste of time for everyone. You know that Wan is a spy. You know Kluer loves the restaurant more than anyone else. Kluer doesn't need to finish the contest or wait for Oab's opinion. That doesn't matter now and it might not have mattered for a while.

+ Kluer is still my lil angel baby...feed that dickhead the long beans, babe! a/n: make no mistake, I know kluer was wrong and gross for trying to kiss Wan. Especially knowing he did not want it. I'll also write Oabs perspective of this but I can't do that without spoiling next week so that'll be a next week meta...

[angstydisaster02]

An analysis about why Bakudeku is one of the most inspirational relationships. (Manga spoilers)

First part : my thoughts

Tbh, I really have this impression the manga is coming to an end very soon, which breaks my heart because I don’t know what I’ll do without my daily leaks. However, I trust Horikoshi about the rest of the story and I do think he’ll make an open ending about which “ship” is canon, even if we all know that the biggest and most developed relationship in the manga is bkdk.

It would be interesting to see the “after” of this war, the hospital beds, the tears because they lost people, the relief because it’s over and the final conversation beg the ending. Knowing Horikoshi until now, never made things randomly because everyone is thinking in advance, including the conversation between Izuku Midoriya and Katsuki Bakugo.

You can’t tell me the author of this manga who always did things with a smart brain will put aside such an important detail about the dynamic between his characters.

A part of me hopes we’ll have the bkdk talk at the hospital or somewhere else because there’s no way these two idiots keep living their lives as if nothing happened. I have high expectations due to the fanfics, but I’m pretty sure I’ll never be the same once the chapter with the bkdk talk comes.

Second part : the analysis feat manga panels

looking forward, it’s incredible how Izuku Midoriya and Katsuki’s relationship started in the worst way (I’m not including the childhood memories) and…Ended up being something like that.

I’m emotional when I think about everything they’ve been through, the many realizations about losing each other, the development of their relationship after an emotional scene such as Deku Vs Kacchan 2, the way they need to push each other’s up to be the best version of themselves in any situation.

It’s not a surprise if these two are mean to be canon (in a platonic or romantic to way, depends about your opinion !) and each little moment highlights this statement.

Think about it : they all learned one of few important things with the other’s presence by their side, on purpose or not. Their dynamic is something unique you can’t find in others shonen or mangas, because they have this specific bond, the one getting stronger though the years because their mistakes became a reason to improve and be a better person for this childhood friend they knew since the early days.

Izuku Midoriya needs Katsuki Bakugo like Katsuki Bakugo needs Izuku Midoriya.

You can’t take away this part of their soul, and even when people like AFO tried, they ended up paying the price by revealing how much they care about each other.

Don’t startd with the Heroees rising thing because I can write an entire novel about them, but this is another proof of how they’re made for each other. Their relationship improve though the years and it’s only the beginning, I can’t help but imagine how future bkdk will have an amazing relationship once they figured out everything and untold truths.

They’re each other’s pillars, holding the other up to do the best and watch from afar their other’s improvement.

That’s why the hospital conversation might be the peak of their relationship: the moment when they’ll both break their shield, welcoming the tears and listening how life is a fragile line on a thread.

None of them refuse to break this meaningful thread, because this is something they’ve built for years, and it’s their biggest strength (and biggest weakness like Shigaraki pulled out)

In conclusion: they’re driving me crazy and I have no regrets following their journey because it’s probably one of the best relationships I’ve seen (and I watched a lot of anime/manga, read a lot of books and they’re still superior !)

Thanks for reading my analysis because it’s one of my guilty pleasures when I’m passionate about something, especially my comfort ship ! Take care of yourself <3

[herecirmsims]

Questions For Storytellers

I have (I think) finally caught up on my list of poses to make, so I wanted to do something a little fun (for me, not for anyone else LMAO) and entirely self-indulgent. I read stories and tell my own over on Instagram, but of course it's harder to post long-form text like this over there.

Special thanks to @freezerbnuuy as I'm copying their post. ❤️

What’s the last screenshot you’ve taken for your story?

This is from the middle of my last post, but it's the last screenshot I took because I went back and added this scene in after finally caving and making my own stupid poses for it hahah.

2. Describe your story in three words or less: Needlessly long tbh

3. Describe (insert character here) in three words or less: Uhhh I'll pick Saxen since he's my MC... wet cat energy (which I think is something @nefaricussims said actually??). Or "90s cocaine chic" as @southernsimmin so beautifully described him. 🤣

4. How did you choose the name of your story? It's called The Cottage because it's... based in and around a cottage. 🥲 I have a very imaginative mind!! 🤣 But also, the cottage plays an important role throughout the whole story and especially in the upcoming finale.

5. How do you choose your characters’ names? My Sim story is based on a novel I never had the confidence to finish - in that version, Sax is an ælf based on Anglo-Saxon belief. I made him a vampire in Sims because that was the only pack I owned at the time, besides base game, and for gameplay purposes I thought vamp put him close to how I imagined him. I now realise I could have easily used CC and my own damn imagination to make him an ælf but I didn't know much about CC at the time, either. 🤣 Because of this, the original story leant into fae lore and the stuff about never revealing your true name. Saxen isn't his real name anyway, but for an added layer it also isn't spelt how you might imagine if you heard it spoken. The same for Thom and Jac who are also characters who came over from the 'original'.

6. How long have you been working on your story for? A little over three years! I have learned soooo much in that time.

7. Whats the biggest risk you’ve taken with your story? Did it pay off? I dunno that I've taken any risks, other than putting it out there in the first place.

8. What about your story are you proud of? I think the fact it exists at all. I've been writing stories since I was a kid, but at some point I lost confidence in myself and have never finished anything/wanted to share it with people because I end up overthinking and deleting it. So I am proud of myself for having maintained a continuous story for three years, and for having other people read it. I think because there was no pressure with a Sims story - with a novel I kept thinking, this has to be perfect and polished so that I can publish it someday. With a Sims story, I'm free to just write the silly tropes I enjoy and allow myself to suck and learn and get better at it.

9. What about your story are you looking to improve on? I read a fantastic article about ma - including pauses in your visual storytelling, space for the characters to sit and breath and reflect. It's ma that makes Ghibli movies so wonderfully distinctive. Being able to make my own poses means that I can show a character's expression or body language in response to a situation, without the need for overlaying text. I'm trying really hard to move away from the "talking heads" style that reads more like a script, and letting the visuals tell the story for me instead. I'm not very good at it because I enjoy my blah blah, but it's fun to try!!

10. Is your story fully planned or are you still working things out? Is there a definitive end? I'm approaching the end of it now, which has been planned for the last three years, so yes - I know pretty much everything that's going to happen. Sometimes the characters still throw a little surprise for me though.

11. Why have you decided to tell this story? Are there any messages or meanings within it? When I got the Sims almost 4 years ago, I had absolutely no idea that there was a) a whole community around it or b) that people used it for storytelling. I'd already made Sax, Thom, and Jac in the game, because I'd wanted to see them come to life during gameplay. Then I discovered poses and started sharing random staged screenshots on Instagram, and became friends with the exceptionally talented TheSimmerKay (now making machinimas!) who showed interest in my silly little characters and suggested that I try telling a story too. I owe her a lot!! As for messages and meaning... I'm very interested in what makes people do the things they do, and how the hero of a story often depends on whose POV we're hearing the story from. There's a fine line between hero and villain sometimes, and a hero acting out of love can cross from protectiveness into control.

12. Do you actually play the game or do you just use it as a storytelling medium? Yep - I have a designated story save, which is the one I take all my screenshots in and which never has gameplay. Then I have a Happy Ever After save for Sax and Fen and another save for for my Globetrotter Challenge Sim, both of which are gameplay only. I think it's important to have that outlet; I can work on my story, make poses, or just play the game, depending on what I fancy.

13. From basic planning to a finished post, how long does that take you? 2-3 evenings. I tend to get everything laid out and text added, then let it sit for a day because I inevitably think of a way to do something better if I give it chance to breath. 🤣

14. Do you have any regrets about your story so far? If you could go back in time, how would you fix these? Not regrets, really, but there are some threads that I put in - fully intending to complete them later in the story - but never did, due to them just not fitting with the story or wanting to try and bring things to an end sooner. But similarly, there are times when I was going to put in a little hint or foreshadowing in and didn't, and then later in my story have wished I had! The tricky part of serialised storytelling is you have to just live with what you have (or don't have), you can't go back and remove or add scenes like you would with a drafted novel.

15. What have been the highlights of creating your story? I've met so many incredible people due to it, oh my goodness. Truly extraordinary Simmers who've shared their time and knowledge with me. We have a little mutual reading group on Insta where we all read and geek out over each other's stories and it's just wonderful. I was honestly shocked when i went to other platforms and realised how much drama there can be in the Sims community. 🤣

16. What about the process do you enjoy? Not that I don't enjoy the process... but I mostly love it when it's finished and I can share it, hahaha.

17. What about the process do you hate? I don't hate any of it... it's a hobby and I do it because I enjoy it. That being said, it does fuck me off when I have multiple Sims in a scene, everyone is in place and has poses queued, and then MCCC Dresser FREEZES MY GAME NOOOOOOOO WHY

18. Choose a song that reminds you of your story:

This is the unofficial theme... specifically this version in Old English, which is Saxen's first language. "It's our destiny then to find love again / Where we failed once before now we'll win"

19. Choose a song that reminds you of (insert character here):

Another one for Sax I guess because he's special. 😌🤣 "But you, a cinder of the fire that's yet to come / Will you just sit and mourn this fragile thing that you've become / Or instead will you consume the very things you can't outrun / Until you finally see all of the strength that you draw from?"

20. Choose your favourite shot from your story so far: Hmmm I think this one, which was me being lazy and reusing a screenshot from an older scene during a flashback-style narration. 🤣 I was trying to achieve something else with the editing but did this by accident and liked it.

21. Choose your least favourite shot so far: Too many to pick from LMAO

22. Choose a favourite character from your story so far: Sax, obviously, he's my lil chew toy/punching bag. But then there's also Idris, for whom I only wish the best. She's going through some trouble right now and I don't enjoy it. It's much more fun to bully Sax.

23. Choose your least favourite character so far: I don't have one! Although Vlad makes me deeply uncomfortable tbh. I find him to be a really creepy villain, and unlike any of my other villains, he's not in any way misrepresented or redeemable. I'm using a makeover version of him by WistfulCastle (I would link, but I don't think he's available anymore?)!

24. Are there any characters who remind you of yourself? No... well. Whenever baby El randomly info-dumps on a niche subject, that's mostly me taking advantage of a captive audience to tell them about karkadanns or medieval torture items or dead bodies on Everest. 🥲

25. What inspirations have you drawn on for your story? I honestly don't know - I can't name anything that I've consciously drawn on, though I know for sure I must have. Funnily enough people have told me things like "oh that's like in Vampire Diaries" or "that's like that part in the Harry Potter films" and I haven't watched either of those, so I think what's happening is we're all drawing from the same well of folklore and mythology and trope. There is occasional story drama about being copied and the thing is... unpopular opinion alert... many of us aren't as unique as we think we are. 😅 What we are unique at is taking a trope and telling it in our own distinctive way. No one else can tell your story quite like you can.

26. Have other sim stories inspired you? I have soooo many talented friends who inspire me to do better when it comes to visuals and storytelling!! @callmedomino is the queen of silent storytelling and a huge inspiration on my journey to discover ma. I really love how well she can tell a story with no words.

27. What genres would you describe your story as? I call it rural fantasy lmao

28. If you could reproduce your story in another medium (movie, novel, comic, etc.) what would you choose and why? I mean obviously I'd say movie because HOW COOL would that be?! Especially an animated one!

29. What would your story’s rating be? (G, PG, M etc.) Ummm probably M because there is the occasional spicy scene. Sometimes three a year LMAO.

30. If you were leaving simblr Simsta and had to choose another creator to continue the story for you, who would you ask? Well tbh I've given Sax and Fen to several good friends already; some of them have them in ongoing cameos in their own stories. I wouldn't ask anyone to continue mine, but I like to think that Sax and Fen could live on in my friend's stories and games if anything were to ever happen to me.

31. Drop some random trivia about your story: When I started I only meant to do short, random vignettes about daily life at the cottage. Somehow it snowballed into a three year epic. 🤣

32. Give a light spoiler: "This is who I am. If I was any other way, I would not be myself."

[virtualtadpole]

Thailand's "cute boy" craze: an explainer

Here's another repost from Reddit, originally from 2022. Since Perfect 10 Liners is currently airing with the "cute boy" page as a key plot point, this seems as good a time as any to re-share (remember that the original novel was first released in 2018). Sorry this one is a wall of text, I wasn't sure it'd be a good idea to include example photos involving people who weren't really public figures at the time.

Those of you following Thai BL will probably have come across this concept of "cute boy" social media fan pages, and might have wondered whether they're an actual thing. Or you may have heard of actors being one of their university's cute boys before joining the industry, and wondered what exactly that meant. Here's my attempt at an explanation.

The roots of the phenomenon go back at least to the popular Thai web forums of the 2000s, especially the youth-oriented Dek-D.com, one of Thailand's biggest and oldest web communities (also known as the web fiction platform which launched many BL novels). Dek-D's forums had a picture-sharing section, with a subsection dedicated to photos of cute guys and girls. It was still the early days of digital cameras and camera phones, and these posts were popular among the site's teen users. A few (mostly girls) who became noticed from these posts became Thailand's first "net idols", many of whom went on to join the entertainment industry.

The arrival of social networking sites around 2007 (first Hi5, then Facebook a few years later) helped facilitate these posts, as publicly posted photos became more easily accessible. The issue of privacy wasn't really on most people's minds then, and most of it was done in a light-hearted spirit. Being featured in these posts meant a boost in followers and online popularity, enabling more teens to become recognized as net idols, but it would be a few more years before this really meant anything. On the other hand, the social networking sites themselves would eventually bypass the traditional forums as a central venue for such posts, and an increasing number of Facebook pages (followed by dedicated Instagram and Twitter accounts) would be created to offer a curated experience instead.

The actual trend of "cute boy" pages took off in 2012, around the same time as the explosive growth of Instagram. Teens flocking to the platform (escaping Facebook, which was now full of parents) filled their public profiles with selfies and portraits of themselves, generating a steady stream of material that these pages could pick up to post and promote. This in turn gave the kids likes and followers, a mutually beneficial arrangement for most thanks to the platform's like-seeking culture.

Of course, not all of these proliferating pages featured teen boys. "Cute girl" pages have their share of followers, though they don't seem to be as visible or talked about, perhaps due to a combination of factors including the way society doesn't consider it as creepy for girls to openly ogle after boys compared to the opposite.

As competition grew, these pages diversified into several niches, including those covering specific schools and universities. Most of the school ones aren't that unusual, given that it's quite natural for students to talk about the popular boys and girls at school, and this had been a trend in school forums long before then. Most of them didn't last long though, as page administrators soon graduated and moved on.

However, things were different for certain high-profile schools, particularly the country's four oldest boys' schools, which participate in the biennial Jaturamitr football competition: Suankularb (SK), Debsirin (DS), Assumption (AC) and Bangkok Christian (BCC). The schools had always been well known, but the Instagram era launched an unprecedented wave of interest in their good-looking students, many of whom attracted huge numbers of followers just by being on Instagram. AC especially stands out in this regard, as Instagram allowed outsiders to glimpse into this exclusive boys' world that served as the basis of Love Sick, the source novel of which was begun in 2008.

Not only were cute boy pages created dedicated to these schools (some by outsiders), some of the boys became minor celebrities in their own right, with fans (mostly sao Y (the Thai term for fujoshi), and also some queer folk) meeting up with and photographing them in real life, especially at school events such as AC's Christmas fair and the Jaturamitr competition. And they were serious about it, coming equipped with professional DLSR cameras and huge telephoto lenses. The schools' student bodies leaned into this popularity, having the popular boys promote fundraising events and selling merchandise to their fans.

The relationship between the boys and their fans seemed to be mostly good, the boys appreciating the positive attention and the fans getting to stan someone much more accessible than the mainstream celebrity. And if they later became famous, then there's the pride of having known them before everyone else. These being sao Y, there sometimes is a bit of shipping, though mostly jokingly. Of course, this was not limited to boys from AC and the other Jaturamitr schools, but they were much more prominent.

This was the backdrop against which Love Sick launched its casting calls in 2014, which generated a huge amount of online buzz throughout the cute boy pages and fan Twitter. There's a reason the series featured such a huge cast with so many minor roles - to provide ample opportunity for fans to latch onto the actors and the show.

In some ways, the cute boy label served as a distancing from the previous term net idol, which by 2014 had begun to develop into a negative stereotype of people using their online fame to sell beauty products for easy profit, especially those livestreaming on emerging platforms such as Socialcam and Bigo Live and whose followers tended to be less sophisticated as opposed to the urban middle-class. Which is why most people appearing on cute boy pages tended to come from higher socioeconomic backgrounds, and much more attention was given to those focusing on elite schools and universities.

At the university level, cute boy (or other similarly named) pages associated with the country's top universities became very prominent online and also offline, often collaborating with the universities' student bodies to promote events and sometimes also assisting in the universities' PR for prospective students. Many universities already had a pageant culture in one form or another, with which these pages tied in well. Most prominent among the pages were Chula Cute Boy and TU Sexy Boy of Chulalongkorn and Thammasat, the country's two oldest universities. The two universities have an annual traditional football match, which the Cute Boy and Sexy Boy pages played large parts promoting in recent years, and is another event that attracts many fangirls.

Some have argued that the net idol phenomenon serves as a democratization of the entertainment industry, opening up opportunities for aspirants to directly connect to audiences as opposed to the traditional model where everything depended on one being picked up by an agency. But it benefits the traditional model as well. While in the old days talent scouts would look for teens hanging out at Siam Square, today they only have to scan the cute boy pages. Many BL actors were discovered this way. Inn Sarin was a long-time favourite of Chula Cute Boy, and Up and Mix first became widely known from there as well. Many others have likewise previously been featured in various cute boy pages, and practically all of the younger actors who joined the industry more recently probably had strong followings before their debut.

But the craze might be coming to an end. While there have long been concerns over today's youth's obsession with looks, and the university cute boy pages have from the beginning been criticized for promoting shallow images of their universities at the expense of academic aspects, they didn't really have any effect on the trend. But this began to change in 2020, when a widespread youth protest movement swept through school and university campuses and liberal progressive ideas rose to the fore. The issue of "beauty privilege" became one of many perpetual topics of discussion, and many began calling for an end to university cute boy pages. Thammasat, long regarded as the university with the strongest student activism, saw the TU Sexy Boy page shutting down (though the admin cited personal reasons and it was never confirmed whether this was in response to the criticism). Many people seem to have stopped tweeting cute boy pictures since then.

On top of the political mood, the pandemic's disruption of normal school life also interrupted the cute boy momentum, as many photo opportunities dried up. Long-time page admins and fans outgrowing the topic and losing interest might also be a factor. The Chula Cute Boy page has also been inactive since late 2020, for undisclosed reasons.

The future seems at best unclear for now. There are still many active pages out there, but on the whole, from what I've seen, there does seem to be a loss of interest. If younger netizens are indeed disinclined to craze after them the same way, the era of cute boy pages might very well soon be over.

Or maybe they've just moved onto TikTok, and I haven't found out how.

----

In the above original post, I neglected to go into the phenomenon of real-people shipping, so I'm attaching this comment from later as an addendum:

Regarding real-people shipping, there are probably two lines of origin that influenced the practice. First is the rise of K-pop and the shipping culture that came with it, which led to a proliferation of online fanfiction in dedicated Thai web communities and a shipping culture forming around the reality singing competitions which were the talk-of-the-town entertainment programs in the 2000s. One of the first really famous shipped pairs was Nat and Tol from Academy Fantasia season 4 in 2007. (That is Nat Sakdatorn, whom you may recognize as the uncle from Never Let Me Go, among many other roles.)

The other origin is the rise of "net idols", which followed the arrival of social media sites (in Thailand this was led by Hi5 in 2006). I covered this in more detail in my post on Thailand's "cute boy" craze, but didn't really touch upon the shipping aspect. Indeed, a significant shipping culture did form (a few years later) around net idols/cute boys. At first this focused more on (people who were believed to be) real-life couples, like Both and Newyear, who became famous in 2012. From there, manufactured/imaginary couples naturally followed in hopes of cashing in on the popularity of such shipped pairs.

I'm a bit hazy on when the shipping of actors as couples actually became a regular thing in the BL industry. While the practice of fanservice moments on the promotion circuit go back at least to The Love of Siam, I don't think there was significant shipping of the actors' real-life persona, and the same seemed to be the case with Love Sick, especially after the series ended. The first actor pair to become shipped as such was probably Krist and Singto from SOTUS, and the practice quite definitely became a thing after that.

----

Postscript: Thanks for reading, and sorry the writing in this one isn't as good as the other posts I've shared. If you're interested in further reading on the topic, I can recommend the article The Yaoi Phenomenon in Thailand and Fan/Industry Interaction. (2019). Plaridel, 16(2), 63–89 by Assoc. Prof. Natthanai Prasannam, one of the leading Thai academics on BL/Y culture in Thailand.

[pinkrangersarah]

some Fearless 7 hc's since i'm sailing this boat by myself

merlin

youngest of the group and arthur doesn't let him forget it, i speculate somewhere between 18, like snow, and 20.

shortest of the group, too, with jack only being an inch or two taller

is honestly the biggest baby and hates scary stories. will put on a brave face, though, especially in front of snow.

100% made up his own theme song at some point. you can't tell me a guy who says "you just got merlin'd" didn't also make up his own dumb theme song.

ambidextrous

hates stagnation. hates to be bored. always needs to be doing something.

arthur

the oldest of the group, 21 at the very least and maybe 24 or 25 at most.

also the tallest and strongest, but i honestly think that's just canon.

puts on that tough guy, macho act, but tbh is really just the biggest softie. a giant teddy bear. gives the best hugs. probably cries during cheesy soap operas and rom coms.

also kind of a baby when it comes to scary stuff. lowkey competes with merlin by mocking him to see who's the most scared.

jack

second youngest, second shortest, but honestly the most mature out of the group. lowkey the mom friend.

scariest temper. is honestly pretty relaxed and doesn't get angry often (irritated and annoyed with the antics of the others a lot though), but when it does happen it will put the fear of god into anyone there to witness it. the triplets are the only ones to have yet to be subjects of his wrath.

has 100% used the invisibility cloak to mess with roommates, typically when they've been annoying and he's feeling exceptionally petty.

has dirt on everybody. no one can prove he's eavesdropping but it is strongly suspected. how else can he hold merlin's theme song over his head?

reads trashy romance novels.

hans

second oldest, second tallest, and the second most mature despite his bumbling and naivety. highkey the mom friend.

the house would literally fall apart if he wasn't around. jack might be a tad bit more mature, but it's jack's indifference that sets them apart. hans is the "should we stop them, we should stop them" to jack's "not yet i want to see how this plays out".

second scariest temper, though. no one has actually yet to see it, but the vibe is there and nobody wants to find out for sure.

is the sole reason why the triplets ever eat because they'll forget if he doesn't practically drag them out of their workshop.

pino, noki, and kio

younger than arthur and hans, but older than merlin and jack. definitely no younger than 20.

no preservation skills whatsoever. very "will leap before looking if there's a lure of scientific excitement". curiosity killed the cat and it'll probably kill them one of these days--if hans and/or jack weren't around to stop them.

different heights if you look closely, but all three are taller than merlin and jack. only one of them is about the same height as hans.

are fairly content in their dwarf bodies! the height change is an inconvenience at most, though they rarely notice since they're hardly ever apart.

at least one of them has found and read jack's trashy romance novels and he isn't sure which one. they won't tell him and lowkey enjoy watching him squirm.

also hate stagnation, being bored. they're always doing something. at least one of them jiggles their legs when they're sitting down.

[storycraftcafe]

Hello there!

Do you have any neurospicy friendly tips for staying motivated? I'd love to write more, especially long-form, multi-chapter works but after a chapter or two I either get bitten by other plot bunnies or real life eats me whole.

Thanks!

Hello friend!

Oh this is right up my alley, grab a cuppa, I get wordy.

As a chronic “too many ideas, too little dopamine” ADHD brain that’s always seeking that lil extra dopamine, I suffer from the exact same problem. My motivation is a fickle thing, as is my ability to focus and my goblin brain is always after the new shiny idea.

But, I’m also at the end of drafting the biggest project I’ve ever completed(it's over 100k words right now), while also planning a novel, developing a few more ideas and writing short stories and doing this blog (intermittently at least for now).

How the hell did I manage that?

I learned to work with my brain, lean into novelty, made things really easy for myself and when needed, got some help and made things fun. 

The truth is, motivation comes and goes, as does inspiration. So we have to figure out how to keep writing without it, and how to wrangle those plot bunnies. That’s the work we do. 

My short answer is this: The solution to focusing on a big project is to make working on this project easier than working on anything else, make it the most enjoyable, and make it the most rewarding.

Here’s some advice on how:

Advice Tidbit the First: Work with your brain

Since us neurospicy types come in so many flavours, it’s impossible to give advice that works for everyone. So find what works for you. You know what helps you focus, you know what your weaknesses are and you know how your brain works. If you don’t, now is the time to find out how to work with your brain chemistry rather than against it. 

If this means having music, using a pomodoro timer, something like a special focus based word processor or a notebook, use it. If this means working with a trusted friend, a community, or alone, do that. 

For me it really means that the big project is always front and centre. It is always open, it is always flagged in my notebook, it is always present and easy to come back to and I always know where I’m going with it.

I’m gonna share some things that work for me and I encourage you to try them, keep what works, and cast off the rest.

Advice Tidbit the Second: Lean into Novelty

My brain relishes novelty, and will happily chase a new idea down a rabbit hole like a Jack Russell on speed and after years of fighting it, I’ve learned sometimes, it’s best to chase the white rabbit and see where it ends up. Just make sure you have a way of putting that idea on a back burner and coming home to the project you want to focus on.

And I do this through a few different means. 

First I write that new idea down, which in turn helps me get it out of my head instead of it repeating ad nauseum like the chewiest earworm. The brain repeats things to remember them, but if you write it down, and then immediately get what you wanna focus on in front of your eyeballs, you might be able to switch gears and get back on track.

Second, I create my own novelty by balancing a few projects at once, that are all at different stages of development, and focus on different ideas. I have the big one that's almost done, I have a novel that’s in planning, a few short story ideas that’s percolating  and this blog which is focused less on creation and more explaining things I’ve learned. And I bounce from these, as needed, to keep things fresh. 

Third, if all else fails, I stop fighting and go wild. I’ve stumbled onto some amazing gems of projects by embracing the mad rush of inspiration until I hit a wall. And the trick for me is, once I hit that wall, I go back to my big project and it always feels a little fresher after that time away.

Writers are creative creatures, and inspiration is a wonderful, amazing, maddening thing that we cannot rely on, but shouldn’t ignore when it strikes. 

Advice Tidbit the Third: Make that shit easy.

A fun, and by fun I mean hellish aspect of my brain chemistry is that the more barriers between me and doing a thing there are, the less likely I am to do the thing. Executive dysfunction is an asshole and should pay but until I can figure out a way to do that, I instead focus on making this as easy for me as possible. 

When it comes to focusing on a specific project, I make sure I have it ready to go when I wanna work on it. I open up the word doc before I go to bed, I leave some notes for myself before leaving it, I never close it unless I absolutely have to, and I always, always have a notebook or my phone on hand to write with, and I have a playlist on hand to get me in the mindset while writing or walking, or working out.

Now if you’re looking at that and going “But Cas, that’s a lot of prep-work”, yeah, it is, and that’s what I do to make things easier to start and stay focused with. Call it the neurospicy-tax. Sometimes shit comes with extra prepwork, but it will help you in the long run.

Thankfully the execution is less painful than it sounds. I just don’t close the word doc for my main project unless I absolutely have to. Opening it first thing is a habit I’ve developed over time as is carrying my notebook around everywhere. Right now I’m trying to build the habit of writing first thing in the morning after breakfast, which means I have the project, or project notes up to read while I eat.

The less I have to think about it, the less steps it takes to start, the easier it is to just do. And do it enough, consistently enough, it becomes habitual. Ish.

Advice Tidbit the Fourth and Most Important: Make the writing easier too.

Yeap. I’m gonna say it. Learn to plan in a way that works for you.

It is so much easier to write freely, consistently and confidently when I have a damn good idea of where I’m going and what targets I’m trying to hit. If you’ve read my waffling about approaching chapters, I go on at length about how that pre-planning makes the work easier. This doesn’t mean you need to have the whole thing planned down to the finest detail, you don’t need every chapter and scene on cards ready to go, unless that’s what works best for you.

However, I have found that I can stick with big projects the best if I have a rough plan consisting of story beats, knowing my character arcs, and solid idea of the ending. With that roadmap, it doesn't matter how lost or distracted I get or how long I spend in the warren of Ploticus Bunnicus, because I have that guide at hand to bring me back to my story. But when I don’t have it… I get lost. And I stay lost. I lose motivation, it’s harder to pick it up again, I lose hope and I abandon that story and feel awful about it.

So if there’s any advice I want you to try it’s this: Figure out where your story is going, where you want it to end up, a few ideas on how you’ll get there, and make a map to keep you heading in the right direction.

It can be as easy as dot points giving you a few ideas about what’s ahead, a few notes from the last writing session to remind you of where you were going, or a paragraph blocking out events in a really condensed summary. Whatever works for you, but have a plan for where you’re going for those moments when something shiny crosses your path. Make working on this main project easier than working on anything else, make it the most enjoyable, make it the most rewarding. Let me know if you want me to talk about my roadmapping/planning process.

Advice Tidbit the Fifth: Get some help.

I would not be as far along in my big project as I am if I didn’t have two really amazing people that helped me along my way as alpha readers. Ie: the two people who got frantic messages at 3am asking if they could look at the raw draft I had just churned out to see if it was okay, and who also, graciously, acted as rubber duckies and brainstorming partners and problem solvers as I figured my own process out.

I owe these two so much.

Writing can be a terribly solitary craft but it doesn’t have to be. So get a buddy, someone that can hold you to task, who can give their opinion, act as a sounding board, who is as excited about the project as you are. I am so glad to be that person for my bestest buddies and they are that person for me.

So find that person, someone you can trust, a friend, another writer, or just someone that has your back. And if you don’t have that person, there are communities aplenty floating around. And I am always, always, ready to cheerlead a fellow writer. Hell, I created a whole damn server just to help other writers that I haven’t been brave enough to advertise yet.  You can find it here. [If the link isn't active, feel free to ask me for one!]

Advice Tidbit the Sixth: Make that shit fun.

Writing is work, there’s no way to get around that and writing a big multi-chapter project is a LOT of work even if you don’t plan, edit, revise, or rewrite (though you should). All my advice so far has been focused on making that work easier, on working with your brain, embracing novelty for your own ends, making the work easier, and working with a friend.

Now we get to have fun.

What makes writing enjoyable for you? Is it having a tasty treat while working or after as a reward? Is it good music? An excuse to go to a cafe? To use a pretty pen? Whatever it is, DO IT. 

I like to have a nice cup of tea in a nice mug while I write. I always have music or something ignorable for background noise on the tv. And I use my very pretty pens in my very nice notebooks.

If you’re anything like me, you possess strong opinions regarding notebooks and pens, and likely have a neglected collection of some pretty stuff. So I’m gonna say something shocking: You should use those nice pens and notebooks.

 No seriously. 

Use them. Use the pretty inks and lovely pens and use them to make writing fun. Switch colours at the drop of a hat or to show scene and pov transitions, practise your handwriting. Use different notebooks for different projects or one big bullet journal style thing for all your writing. 

Create yourself an everyday writers kit and take it everywhere with you. Use it. If you’re doom scrolling, switch your phone for your writing kit and start jotting down some ideas or write a single sentence for your story. Use these pretty shiny things. I dare you.

Keep in mind, you DO NOT need expensive pens or papers ever at all. You can do this with a cheap notebook and a ballpoint. I’m just a stationery nerd and I like using the nice things I’ve bought instead of them sitting there doing nothing.

Here’s my kit, a black traveller’s notebook with three inserts and a kraft folder, two pen loops stuck onto the folder and two TWSBI eco fountain pens. Each insert is for a different kind of project (drafting the long project, brainstorming and planning or short stories, and planning and drafting articles for this blog.) and I have sticky tabs in the folder to make pages and specific projects. Sometimes I add a pouch of yet more fountain pens because I don’t have a problem, I have a collection.

Flex aside, my point is use tools that you enjoy using. If that means a nice clacky keyboard, use it, if that means fancy ass pens, use them, if that means something you’re not scared of breaking, use it. 

Now for gamification: A common bit of advice I hear for ADHD brains specifically is to gamify the tricky things and thank the gods, there’s a bunch of people who have figured out ways to do this.

For writers specifically we have a few tasty choices.

A quick search for ‘gamifying writing’ will turn up a bunch of results but here’s a few favourites of mine.

4thewords is web browser based RPG game where you write to battle monsters and make your way through the story. It is a subscription however but it’s fairly affordable ($4 USD a month) if you end up using it everyday. It comes with progress trackers, avatars you can get cool things for, a big community and it has a 15 day trial that does not need a credit card for. Wahoo. I’ve used it, it's a lot of  fun, but it doesn’t gel with my other needs quite as well but I do turn to it none and then when I really wanna buckle down and focus. Give it a go~

Write Or Die is a classic sprint writing tool that I’ve been a fan of for years. Basically you write or you are ‘punished’ via flashing screen, loud noises or if you’re brave, there’s the mode that eats your words if you stop typing for too long. It is a one man developer that said and a bit old and neglected but Write or Die 2 is worth it if this helps you stay focused.

Too high stress? Think about trying…

Written Kitten is a web browser based writing motivator that gives you a cute kitten picture every time you write a certain number of words. It’s adorable.

Or you can grab that writing buddy of yours, or just yourself, a timer and do a writing sprint. Pick a number of words, set your timer and write until the timer goes off. See how well you did, see how any words you can get and how far above the set number you can go.

In the end all this leads to the same key point, which is to make working on your long multi-chaptered project as easy, fun and rewarding as you possibly can. If you have a mind that chases fun, make the work fun, if it chases novelty, make the work novel, if it lacks focus, figure out how it likes to focus and apply that to your project. 

You can wrangle your brain, but you have to work to its strengths. But before I wrap this up

Advice Tidbit the Seventh: Go easy on yourself.

Neurospicy brains are particular and challenging and common advice doesn’t always work for us and that’s okay. It can be tricky figuring out what works and what doesn’t, and spoons aren’t always plentiful, our moods aren’t always cooperative and sometimes the work really is hard no matter what we do. And that’s okay. What matters, I think, is that we keep trying. A few words a day are still a few words a day.  It adds up.

You got this and I am always happy to have a chat or listen.

Good writing!

[nelladivinita]

A Brahms Heelshire NSFW alphabet!

Mostly gender neutral.

TW - somnophilia, cuckolding mention, and voyeurism.

Enjoy! 💞

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex):

“After… care?” Brahms is a Spoiled Brat and is used to being taken care of. He has never lifted a finger in his life, especially for others, so he’ll need to be taught what exactly aftercare is and why it’s necessary. Once he understands, he’ll usually do what you do for him when he’s overwhelmed: he’ll hold you in his lap and let you nuzzle your face into his neck, maybe even softly rocking you as you come down. He figures it works so well for him, it will for you too. But if you want something else, just ask, and he’ll be happy to deliver.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s):

Loves your chest, your belly, and thighs. When he’s not lying with his face buried into one, it’s always buried into another. It makes him feel safe, and the sounds you make when he starts mouthing you are euphoric to him, so he can never stay there for long without taking things further. As for his own body, Brahms loves his cock. An easy answer, but it’s true. Ever since your jaw dropped and your cheeks flushed red the first time you saw his impressive size he’s begun admiring it in private, and working hard to learn how best to pleasure you with it.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

When you first started fucking, Brahms wanted to cum somewhere new every session. On your face, your chest, in your hair (???), in your mouth, down your throat; but the first time you let him finish inside you, his life was genuinely changed and he became eternally obsessed. The poor thing had been begging to for some time, so when you finally let him, he whimpered and cried and in his big boy voice, practically roared as he emptied into you.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Wants to be cuckolded by the grocery boy. He’d NEVER tell you this, but while he was still hiding in the walls, too afraid to come out and face you, the raging jealousy he had towards Malcolm had nowhere to go but into his pants. Admittedly, he was more so masturbating to the idea of catching you and Malcolm in flagrante delicto and emerging from the walls to murder him in cold blood right in front of you, but that’s neither here nor there.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Take a wild guess <3 Brahms is the biggest virgin to ever live, never even seeing other people unless they were coming to apply as his nanny, and as we all know, that never worked out, and even when it did, it didn’t really, you know? But he has read enough anatomy books and snuck enough of his mothers erotica novels into his room to have a pretty good idea of what goes where and what he might like. Still, once he’s there with you he will be a warbling, awkward mess for the first several months.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Loves to fuck you with your back against a wall and your legs wrapped around his waist. It lets him have control and show off his strength, and because of your height difference, he can also cry hard into your neck if he becomes especially emotional at the affection he’s receiving, or at the idea of you leaving him. He also loves you in missionary too, where he can pound into you with reckless abandon, at times not bothering to thrust, just dropping his hips into you again and again, bottoming out until the sun comes up.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

VERY serious. When Brahms is fucking you he’s a Big Boy, with no time for games or jokes. Giggles and teasing is for Chutes and Ladders later; right now, he’s the scariest and most intimidating thing you’ve ever seen.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

HAIRY HAIRY HAIRY THE HAIRIEST THING TO EVER LIVE. His hair isn’t just on his chest but all across his stomach too, and it all culminates at his pubic hair, which is thick and fluffy and dark, and pokes out the top of his slacks at all times. If you want him to trim it, you’ll have to explain why to him at length, and probably do it yourself.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Honestly, in the beginning Brahms doesn’t understand intimacy. For the first several months he baby talks unless he’s moaning, and he will beg for most of what you have to give him. It isn’t until you begin to actually develop feelings for one another and his emotions extend past lust, into areas previously untouched in his psyche, that he’ll begin to have moments of equality with you. Then he’ll fuck you gently, and plant kisses into your hair, whispering in his grown up voice how thankful he is to have you, how beautiful you are, and how he wants to take care of you too. This likely comes after he finally takes his mask off.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

Call Guinness World Records, Brahms might get a fancy plaque for this one. When you first show up, he practically never stops masturbating. Even as you sleep, he’s pressed panting against his side of the wall, desperate to stay quiet as he cums into his hand, and at times on the wall and floor, as many times as he can bear it. Will steal your underwear constantly to masturbate with and at one point even your shower poof. Once you know of his existence and start fucking, it will drop off some. If you punish him for misbehaving by refusing him though, he will jerk off right at the dinner table, and he loves cumming in his timeout corner.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Somnophilia. It started when he’d masturbate to you sleeping, and partially stems from his initial belief that, because of his disfigurement, sex with him isn’t something that you’ll want if you know it’s him. But in sleep? He could make you feel as good as possible and not have to be himself. Until he felt your love, that was all that felt safe.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

Loves to take you into his dirty creepy room so he can fuck you on his bed rather than the makeshift you that he made. He also delights in the fact that he’s fucking you in a place that was hidden to you for so long; his pervy secret headquarters! But on top of that, this space is His. There are no traces of his parents, he even has his own fridge! So it sort of makes him feel like he’s invited you back to His Place, and he feels very confident and grown up and happy to have you there.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Absolutely everything. You swear you must be a supermodel the way everything you are and do sends him into a frenzy or leaves him straining against a wet spot on the front of his slacks. But it’s not a problem, because he makes you feel the same way, and nothing turns him on more than knowing that.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Brahms will never EVER invite someone else into your bed. Remember that cuckolding fantasy? Well if Malcolm even thinks of thinking of you in realistic terms, Brahms will, as mentioned, put him into an early grave. You are Brahms’ and he is yours, exclusively and eternally.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

He’s absolutely over the moon at both. The first time you go down on him his eyes will be as wide as saucers and he’ll be frozen to the spot lying on his back, only kicking his legs out softly to accentuate the pleasure of your mouth. But as time goes on, he will get more daring and will lose control, fucking the back of your throat with his hands on your head. Giving, giving giving giving. He loves it. He loves the ecstasy of your soft thighs on his scarred skin; so often untouched, even by him. It makes him feel amazing to know you’re aroused by him despite his burns, and they way you grip his curls, the way you grind and fuck his tongue, he’s in heaven at your pleasure, sometimes cumming from the taste, sound, and sight alone.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Initially he is rough and fast the entire way through. He just can’t help himself, and he doesn’t understand that you need more time than he does to be ready to fuck him like that. He’s blinded by how tight and warm you are, and unless you’re in serious pain, you probably won’t have the heart to stop him anyway, seeing just how desperate and ecstatic he is to be there. However, he will listen to you if you really need him to slow down. In time he will learn your body and he will begin to value your slow sessions, where he is able to look into your eyes and share a quiet, pleasure filled space with you.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Brahms LOVES quickies. No matter where you are or what you’re doing 90% of the time, you can expect him to come up behind you and start rutting against your ass, or dropping to his knees to taste you. By the way, the first time he sees you’re not underwear for him will practically kill him on the spot.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

Will ask you every once in a while to leave a note telling Malcolm that you took doll Brahms to the park, asking him to put the groceries away himself. But little does Malcy-boy know, Brahms will be fucking you mercilessly inside the closest wall as he moves around the kitchen. Brahms will keep a hand over your mouth, as he knows how important it is that Malcolm doesn’t know he exists, but he still loves the thrill and the revenge (against what, you’re not sure) of this explicit act.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

Maybe call Guinness again for this one. Brahms gets hard again almost instantly, and no matter how high your sex drive, nothing will satiate him until he’s good and satisfied himself. Initially he doesn’t last long, but as he gains endurance and self control, get used to going for hours at a time, with only half hour breaks in between at most.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

Brahms doesn’t like calling the make-shift you a toy, but at the end of the day, it is in fact a toy. As for yourself, he used to get poisonously jealous of your toys before he got to fuck you like he wanted to. You found so many smashed, water logged vibrators that nothing made you more suspicious of strange happenings in the house as they did. But now that you are fucking, he likes to use the toys to over-stimulate or for you to over-stimulate him. He sees them as fun additions, but prefers when it’s just him and you.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Brahms loves to lift your skirt and reach up to graze your thigh as you do your chores. But usually this is just so you’ll get frustrated with him and punish him, because he LOVES to be teased himself. Surprise him by waking him up topless, ask him to help you wash your body in the shower, and threaten him with no dessert if he touches his red, soap covered cock. He is never so obedient as when you’re dangling everything he’s ever wanted right in front of him.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

SO LOUD it makes you blush as his moans and whimpers and cries and roars echo around the enormous mansion no matter where in it you happen to be. The only time he’s quiet is when he’s fulfilling his “fuck you, Malcolm” fantasy, and when you’re sharing one of your quiet intimate moments, where the focus is as much on pleasure as it is on connecting, showering each other soft and conservative love.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Remember those dirty books Brahms would steal from his mother’s library? Well his favorite had a scene with raspberries and whipped cream that he’s been dying to try since it came into his limited zone of awareness. So expect once every couple of weeks for those ingredients to be added to the grocery list.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes

‘I just know his dick is big!’ We’re talking well above average ladies and gentlemen, about eight inches long and THICK. No matter how many sessions you have in a day, he never really stops feeling like he’s on the edge of being too big.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

We’ve already touched on this but Brahms will “never ever ever” get tired of fucking you. He’s waited his whole life to find someone like you. Someone so kind and beautiful and soft and sexy to fulfill his Every Waking Need, and let’s face it, most of his waking needs are sexual; so he’s going to make the most of every moment, and indulge himself as often as his little heart desires.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Conks out immediately. Brahms will usually cry or whimper before he falls asleep after he’s finally done cumming, so hold him like he holds you, and you’ll fall asleep together safe and warm (but don’t forget the somnophilia).

[purplesoulcollection]

How he show his love

Lloyd Frontera is a man who carefully considers the potential gains from every challenge he encounters, even if the issue originates with him. He not only resolves these problems but often creates new ones in the process.

To those who meet him for the first time, he can seem quite unpredictable, especially if they don’t see him often. However, beneath a facade that might suggest a devilish nature when it comes to scheming.

Lloyd possesses a caring side that is known only to his closest friends and family. And here's the list for his way of loving (Not a spoiler because i didn't seeing the novel)

I like to think that Lloyd love language is giving a present for us.

He dreams of being a wealthy slacker, someone with plenty of money to splurge on lavish gifts for us. He believes that anything less than extravagant just won't do. (In Korea, he feels limited in his ability to buy nice things, so he channels that frustration in another world.)

He's not really the kind of person who openly expresses his love for us. Sometimes, he even embellishes the truth a bit.

He tends to claim that we love him the most, while Lloyd acts all high and mighty, pretending to love us just because it's expected of him. He's not 100% telling the truth.

When it comes to expressing genuine feelings, he often struggles to find the right words and ends up rambling something opposites from what he want to say. He’s not used to being completely vulnerable, and his past experiences have made him wary of that. He was afraid of losing someone he loved again, like his parents

As time passes, Lloyd's love for us continues to grow stronger. He will become bolder in sharing his feelings and will openly acknowledge that he loves us the most. Plus, he'll plan delightful surprises to bring us joy. like make some future home in advance (Poor Javier who has to work hard to keep up with Lloyd's crazy ideas.)

But i think he's also little bit quality time and physical touch person. But he only doing that when he's not having any work to do and not being distracted.

When the construction begin, he will so busy and choose to shut himself away and make us worry about him.

As Lloyd's partner, we must at least be patient enough to accompany him in silence and remind him periodically that he needs rest and food too…

Lloyd might be feeling frustrated with our suggestions, a bit angry and annoyed. However, he wouldn’t trade our concern for a breakup; he understands that we care about him too.

Since his parents passed away, there’s no one to remind him to take breaks while working on his architectural projects. This often leaves him feeling lonely after he finishes his work, missing the moments when his mother would encourage him to take a break for a warm meal, or when his father would urge him to get some rest instead of staying up too late.

Despite his irritation, experiencing the attention he has missed for so long brings him a sense of happiness deep down, even if he would never openly express it to us. We have to be the one to find it through his behavior.

Lloyd has a knack for spotting his opponent's weaknesses and using them to his advantage, but sadly, that keen perception doesn't extend to his partner.

Having never had a partner before, Lloyd lacks the sensitivity and experience that comes with such a relationship. Understanding his partner's feelings is much more challenging for him than it is with others.

Whether his partner is feeling angry, annoyed, or disappointed, Lloyd struggles to provide what they need.

When he finds himself puzzled by his partner's actions, he often turns to Javier for advice. However, since Javier is just as clueless as him, the biggest possibility is they both end up being more confused than before.

He likes to tease us too (no one can escape that) but he wouldn't like it if someone else did it to us, it's his privilage.

Jealous? Despite he being a scammer, when he's jealous it will show in his face for like 5 seconds before he could control himself and managed to drive away the person who made him jealous by sarcastically condescending with his annoyed face.

Please don't make a situation when javier have to choose either lloyd or us in the danger. Whatever choice he choose he and lloyd will regret that.

If Javier chooses us, Lloyd will feel depressed and deem it unimportant to let him die and Javier will feel guilty in his heart for ignoring the person he swore to protect with his life.

But if Javier saves Lloyd, Lloyd will be sad because Javier thinks we are not important and Javier will feel guilty because he couldn't save the person his master loves.

For PDA, I think he will either be so bold to do it or he being considerate, i will lean on the second.

The first choice is in line with his usual nature, but since when someone in love can be in his usual nature? so the second. Even if he's from korea where the guys aren't really the romantic type, especially when it comes to women.

However, Lloyd stands out by treating us with genuine care and affection. He goes out of his way to help us with things that are tough to manage, takes care of us when we're feeling under the weather, and when we're upset, he keeps his feelings in check to avoid causing us any more pain.

Lloyd can't stand the thought of making someone he loves feel sad. He finds it hard to cope with others' sadness because his own life has its challenges.

He also understands that he has a stronger emotional foundation, and he recognizes that his partner may be more vulnerable, so he chooses to remain calm and gentle, no matter how frustrated he might feel.

But you could say that when it comes to sexual matters, Lloyd is quite naughty, this time his face is the same as his heart. I'm sure that we will be tricked into having a sexual scene that can satisfy him. (bless whoever being not so lucky) ref from one headcanon someone made about lloyd.

His design ring for his lover is probably the most simple within all his gift. because in the past he was not rich at all, so at least the thing that could get him the approval of his deceased parents was a simple ring like his parents' rings, which, even though it looked plain, was the most beautiful piece of jewelry that Lloyd knew.

His wedding is the biggest to show off while making everyone happy with a big party and exciting food and entertainment. Frontera family would make it a huge scene.

He's so happy to get a perfect lover for him.

The End

[lurafita]

Raphael is a little shit (and wow, that's an underrepresented trope in this fandom if you ask me). He especially likes to mess with shadowhunters.

Raphael to Alec: "So, what did you get Magnus for tomorrow?" Alec: "Why, what's special about tomorrow?" Raphael: "It's the anniversary of the day he became High Warlock of Brooklyn. He might not say as much, but it's really important to him." Alec, panicked: "I need to go shopping. Underhill, you are in charge!" runs out of the institute Raphael whispers to Izzy: "There is no such anniversary." -

Raphael to Jace: "You know, since Luke is basically Clary's father, and the alpha of the biggest wolf pack around, it wouldn't hurt if you paid tribute to him." Jace: "Tribute? What are you talking about?" Raphael: "You are dating someone he claimed as his child. For werewolves, that makes you pack-adjacent. It's tradition that you offer a gift to both the alpha and the next of kin to your lover. Since Luke is both, you only have to appeal to him in that case." Jace: "Isn't that a little old fashioned? Sounds like a practice from one of those regency novels Izzy denies reading." Raphael: "Oh, because shadowhunter traditions are all up to date according to the times we live in?" Jace: "Point. What kind of gift do I even have to get?" Raphael: "I'm sure you will think of something. It doesn't need to be expensive. Just remember that it has to appeal to his wolf side more than his human side. A pack of bacon, or a raw chewing bone would do." Luke is very confused when Jace invites him to a steak dinner the following evening

[viperwhispered]

New fic idea: Jamil VS the ex

Context: Jamil and s/o have been dating for while. Things are going great and everyone is just happy. There are no real jealousy issues on either side cause they trust each other and Jamil is confident he's the best catch around. If there is any jealousy, they talk it out like mature human beings since being petty doesn't solve anything. Though there is defintley possessiveness, it never leaves the bedroom and they both enjoy it.

Introducing the ex: just a complete toxic dump. As in, shitty romance novels stereotypical male lead toxic dump. Just controlling, verbally/emotionally abusive, physically intimidates people, tries to use sex to fix things, doesn't know when to leave their exes alone, gets physical with love rivals, etc. For reference feel free to look at Christian Grey from 50 Shades, Hardin Scott from After, and Edward Cullen from Twilight. Honestly it didn't last more than a week yet the ex continued to stalk our poor reader and ruin any attempt at a finding a new lover.

Cue them getting to NRC and finally having a chance at a relationship with our boy Jamil. But unfortunately all good things must come to an end when reader invites Jamil home to meet their family. Let's say that if the reader is not from TWST then they have a way to dimension travel and the family is in on it.

Jamil is quickly welcomed into the family and they make it clear that he's the best boyfriend the reader has had so far. The reader and their family are quick to warn Jamil about the ex and the sabotages. He learns the details from his albi's angry rants about all the bullshit this guy did.

At one point the reader turns to him and goes: "you have my permission to be as much of a possessive scheming bastard as you want. Ruin his reputation, frame him, humiliate him, I don't care! He's messed with my life far too much for me to care about him anymore. If we run into him, feel free to shove it in his face that I am yours. Hold me, kiss me, leave hickies, whatever! I trust you to know my boundaries and when to do it. Hell, if you manage to get rid of him, then we might as well skip the formalities and go straight to the alter."

Cue Jamil plotting:

1. Get the ego boost from going PDA in front of your lover’s ex. Note: make sure beloved is wearing his hoodie/jersey for maximum boost.

2. Get rid of the abusive ex who's been harming his beloved for YEARS.

3. Plan the wedding.

Meanwhile, the reader is just enjoying the extra affection while munching popcorn as their dear boyfriend gets rid of the biggest nuisance in their life. Yes they get turned on by it, especially the smirk. They're planning to thoroughly spoil him when this is over, both in and out of the bedroom.

Bonus: in your professional opinion, what route would Jamil take to get rid of the ex and how sadistic does he get?

Hasdkföjask yes just let Jamil loose on the problem and enjoy the fireworks.

Also hasdfads in my professional opinion, huh? I feel honored. 🥺👉👈

Oop this got long so below the cut it goes.

(Also boy am I glad the ex did not get to do too much lasting damage to reader’s ability to have a healthy relationship. Jamil already has enough baggage for both of them to go through. Still, someone get a restraining order on that ex, stat.)

“Yes they get turned on by it, especially the smirk.” Just… too true. Man’s just way too hot when he’s all confident and cocky I swear.

Also ngl this brand of possessive I can definitely get behind.

Also I love that tasklist, just not sure which one I love more, the note to task 1 or just the entirety of task 3. Tho of course, Jamil being Jamil (and I may or may not be projecting here) I’m sure there’d be plenty of subtasks / -steps to each of these.

(Also sidenote yes Jamil definitely would know how to turn up the charm for the in-laws for extra approval points. What a charming well-behaved young man, just delightful 😇)

Now, the options coming to my mind are:

Something “private”: only the ex (and reader) needs to know what happened exactly, but it’s enough to spook the ex and keep him in line. (I mean, getting snake whispered? Should be pretty scary, especially depending on what Jamil does with it. Oh boy, the potential.)

Something public: ruin this guy’s image, future prospects, credit score, everything, make everyone see him for the cretin he is. Might cause backlash depending on just how concerning this guy is, but also long-lasting consequences.

Ignore the gnat, just rub things in his face by just being super sweet and loveydovey wherever he happens to be without ever directly confronting him because he’s not worth the effort (not too likely, Jamil’s definitely way too petty (or incensed) to just leave it at that).

Now, getting information on people may be Azul’s specialty, but I’m sure Jamil won’t have too much trouble finding out enough (like where the ex works, lives, stuff like that. If this is a different world (or even just different country), I’m sure reader can help him with the details of what is possible and all).

And by the sounds of things, this particular jerkwad is bound to turn up anyway. So maybe it’s just a case of waiting and being ready, setting up the favorable circumstances.

So Jamil and s/o would be going out and about. Maybe to the shops, maybe just a walk outside, whatever they know is likely to land them on the ex’s path.

The thing about the hoodie is that it’s not necessarily obvious (to the ex) that it belongs to Jamil, rather than you. So he’d probably go for the jersey (since that name obviously isn’t yours (at least yet)), or weather permitting he’d only loan out his hoodie to you at an opportune time.

Like, as soon as you two realize the ex is around, you’re all oh, it sure is a little chilly isn’t it, have my hoodie my dear, it’ll keep you warm. Cue makeout session (and definitely no smug glances from Jamil to the ex, no siree. Nothing of the sort when he holds you tighter, pulls you closer, lets his hands trail along your back, into your back pockets or perhaps even under your shirt. Definitely.).

When ex comes over, you’re conveniently in a public place (probably conveniently within sight of cameras, too, so there’d be something on record to go to authorities with, if needed, and for extra consequences).

I’m thinking Jamil might be all “innocent”, at least overtly (and as much as he can hold himself back - he’s used to mingling with the high and mighty and keeping face, but this is more personal) - tho there might be some underhanded barbs with plausible deniability, or just all the casual things about how you’re Jamils and how you’ve been together for however long and how Jamil just met your parents etc. Basically just reminding the ex of what he can’t have.

Tho once Jamil distances himself (and you), from the guy, I could see Jamil going to somewhere more secluded (with or without you, depending on how you agreed in advance). And if and when the ex follows, he gets a very different side of Jamil. Sharp tongue, no holds barred, told in no uncertain terms how pathetic and despicable he is, and to keep away from you, your family, and anyone else who has any connection to you. But especially you.

The only problem I have is thinking of just what he’d do to seal the deal. I mean, probably Jamil would make the guy do something bad / unpleasant with snake whisper. Like, make the dude do something humiliating, film it and leave it on his phone for him to find later? Make him go out into the crowds to make a fool out of himself? (Perhaps in a location with his friends / family / whatever around?) Get him to send some very terrible messages to some folks?

I think I’m a bit too nice to think of just how far Jamil could go, and snake whisper does have its limitations, too. Like to really ruin someone, you need to do something more impactful than just one unfortunate action.

(I mean I suppose maybe he could make the dude kill someone and go to prison for that but yeah let’s not.) Robbery, tho? I’m sure there’s some sort of a crime we can squeeze out of the guy that would not be too bad for bystanders (not that Jamil would be that bothered, tbh) but would still be enough of a consequence, and which could still be achieved with snake whisper.

That, or just make the guy walk into a cesspit or something, especially if it’s right before something important.

I’m kinda just spitting this out (and brain’s a bit fried) but also this was such a juicy concept I had to jump on it.

Honestly I feel like there’d be so much more to be said just for the PDA part and the possessiveness and protectiveness Jamil would feel and everything else, and maybe I’ll get back to that another time.

Did you have any particular thoughts of how you think it might go?

[kimbapisnotsushi]

it's akaashi's birthday!!! you guys know what that means!!!!!!!!!! have some timeskip special headcanons about akaashi and co. let's go!!!!

i think akaashi deserves a spin-off about his misadventures in the manga department honestly

gekkan shoujo nozaki kun. sekaiichi hatsukoi. bakuman. there is a lesson to be learned here people!!!!!

tenma gifts him a planner for his birthday and the first thing he does after opening it is mark all of tenma's deadlines. which he also has recorded in his phone calendar. AND he has them memorized. AND on sticky notes scattered throughout the office

tenma: you know i got you this planner so that you wouldn't have to put sticky notes everywhere, right? akaashi, sleep-deprived and running on five cups of coffee: time waits for no one, udai-san

the office has a special "akaashi keiji emergency rest kit" for when he falls asleep at his desk

it's got a blanket if it's cold, a pillow they tuck under his head, a bottle of water and snacks they leave next to him if he gets hungry/thirsty when he wakes up, and an eye mask that they put on him after they take off his glasses

idk i think the whole office really loves akaashi

and he really loves them back!!!! they're a team!!! they work together!!!! deadlines might be hell but at least it's a hell they're united in!!!

akaashi finding love and contentment and happiness in a place he initially wasn't sure about is everything to me okay

also i think he wingmans tenma and akiteru. i think it'd be very funny.

akaashi knows it's bad when he catches tenma drafting a whole new romance plot and he's like "udai-san. please. you have something due in five days you canNOT be doing this right now"

honestly akaashi just wants them to get together so that tenma will stop being dreamy and distracted and ACTUALLY focus on getting his manuscript done on time

and then they DO get together and akaashi is subjected to even more dreamy sighs and staring off into the distance and whatnot

tenma is such a disaster you guys i love him

ALSO YOU KNOW HOW MANGAKAS HAVE A LIL MASCOT TO REPRESENT THEMSELVES IN THE AUTHOR'S NOTE. TENMA'S IS DEFINITELY SOME KIND OF CROW

someone asks tenma if he has a favorite pro vball player and tenma says "hinata shouyou" with the BIGGEST smile on his face and hinata almost cries

LMAO HOW FUNNY WOULD IT BE IF KENMA OFFERED TO BANKROLL AND DEVELOP A ZOMBIE KNIGHTS VIDEO GAME

i mean i barely even know what zkz is about but based on the title i feel like it'd make a good video game

yachi can help design . . . lev and komi can voice act . . . yes . . . it's all coming together . . .

NEVER MIND I KNOW WHAT IT IS I READ A TRANSLATION OF THE LIGHT NOVEL IN THE MIDDLE OF WRITING THIS

he wrote zkz in a restaurant are you SHITTING me udai tenma i love you

so apparently it got discontinued?? instead of allowing tenma to finish it the way he wanted?? so when tenma hears that kenma wants to make a video game out of it he ends up in tears

kenma's like "well it might have failed as a manga. but i think it'd make a pretty good video game, if you want to help out with that"

god everything about it makes me want to cry actually. tenma who is still chasing after his dreams. and akaashi right there, learning how to be better. learning how to be passionate. learning how to give tenma his all. because he's TENMA'S editor and he'll be damned if he doesn't do it well.

udai tenma in an interview about meteo attack: "yes, i am sad i didn't get a chance to end zkz in a way that would have made me happy. it was my first series, and that's always going to be precious to me. but meteo attack is one i'm looking forward to. it's a story about learning how to fly, when everybody else has long since been trampling on your wings and telling you that you can't."

sorry i did NOT mean to get this emotional over them. but now i am. and i am going to be thinking about it forever

meteo attack def gets raving reviews from players in the pro volleyball league, especially from hinata shouyou

[ebonysplendor]

TOUCHSTARVED (Demo) 💔🫴

TL;DR: People are always saying "Touch grass" but even that might be dangerous in this scenario. If you thought Mike Tyson's hands were lethal, wait until you find out how our hands work.

Game Link: https://redspringstudio.itch.io/touchstarved

Notable features: Self-Insert, Multiple LIs, DnD vibe, MC backstory selection, Multiple endings/routes, Choice-Heavy Spiciness: 3.5/5 -- Nothing too explicit and no sex scenes or anything like that, but it does get pretty suggestive and there's some flirty jokes and comments here and there, especially with one particular LI LI(s) Red Flags: ...I mean, aside from one of them being a suspiciously smooth talker and the other essentially implying that they'd corrupt us, the biggest red flag is one of them having the cleanest pickpocket skill in history

Wanna know more? Meh, there's not an age limit, but the game pages does say it's for older audiences so, me personally, ... I'd say at least sixteen, but the older, the better. Anyways, let's get into it!

Okay, I'm sorry, but I have been coming across some damned gems lately!

Once again, this was one of the visual novels I downloaded forever ago, and what the heeeeeell, this was so good! Like, no, it was REALLY damned good. I'm not going to get into my ranting and raving like I tend to do because then the intro will get all long, but just know that, once again, I am geeked. Like, why have these game developers been going in so hard lately?!

I honestly have so much more to say, but I really want to get to the summary and the review portion, so I'm going to half-ass this intro and leave it here. That being said, this is NOT a yandere visual novel; however, it is a dark romance visual novel, so, it's still not the super teeth-rotting, cutesy, fluffy stuff.

Anyways, I'm going to tell you as much about the game as possible without ruining the game itself (like usual). Be mindful that, because it's a demo, there's not really an "end" nor is it even leading up to the end. The best way that I can qualify the demo is deadass...a demo. Like, it's a literal introduction and acts as a showcase to the rest of the game. More accurately, it flows exactly like how you'd think the prologue to a story would, "Chapter 0", honestly speaking.

Anyways, I'm done yapping; let's summarize. Just a heads up, though, it's gonna be a little lengthy, so...get comfy. All right, now let's get into it.

So boom.

In the spirit of keeping things as brief as possible: We're cursed, and that curse flows throughout our hands, front and back; it is for this reason that we keep them completely bandaged to ensure our own safety (kinda) and for everyone else's sanity. We believe that we can find a cure in this city called "Eridia", which is known to be this city of vast knowledge, and within this city of vast knowledge is this place called "Senobium". Senobium is where we're hoping our answers lie.

Lmao, I know that's a hell of an opener, but that's quite literally what's going on. We have been cursed since the start of forever, and we're essentially tired of feeling no sense of belonging anywhere, so we're trying to fix that; however, shit goes very left, very fast.

As we're on the way to this oh so great city of knowledge, we get hit with this ominous fog, and everyone who's travelling with us immediately knows: this is not good. No sooner than later, we're pretty certain that we hear someone getting killed nearby and the carriage that we were in is suddenly flipped over and blood gets shed very quickly. As expected, and for plot purposes, when the carriage got flipped over, our ankle took some extra damage which makes running a very unlikely option. Because of this, this terrifyingly dangerous creature wastes no time approaching us. Wanna see what it looks like?

That, my friends, is what is referred to as a "soulless", and it can rip you to literal shreds within seconds.

For whatever reason, this thing darts past us and disappears into the mist, but we don't ask questions; we just bolt behind the carriage for cover, and we're thankful that there is still someone alive after the attack. It would be much more comforting, though, if the guy wasn't praying, because that meant either one of two things:

We were very much so fucked, and he was trying to put in a good word for himself real quick before he potentially met his maker

or 2. We are very much so fucked, and the only thing that is applicable in this scenario is to pray and hope it disappears

but either way, we are very much so fucked.

That being said, we simply can't accept that. We don't pray, because we don't have the time. We've literally come too far to get taken out right outside the very city that holds our salvation, and that's all the reminder that we need when we see those city lights through the haze.

That reminder doesn't last long, though, because remember that soulless that vanished? Well, it came back, and the guy that was praying essentially brushed up against our hand, trying to get us to dip out with him because, duh, situation kind've popping off. Now, you remember that curse I mentioned? Well, our bandages kind've tore off during all of this ruckus, and all it takes is the slightest touch to make a person go from this

to this.

Yeah, so...not good.

Anyways, the situation essentially keeps escalating until we're one hit point away from death...but it never happens, because the next time we open our eyes, we see him.

Maybe we are dead, because hello~! Lookin' like an ethereal being in all of that white and attractive features! Like, gyatt DAMN. That is one fine ass angel!

Honestly, there are a lot of guys, and a lot of swooning, and a lot of introductions, so I'm going to kind've rush through those parts, especially since I don't want to ruin too much.

So, to get back on topic, essentially what goes down is that he -- his name is Kuras, by the way -- found us pretty much dead where the attack went down and brought us into the city to treat us. Now, this isn't because he's a hero or anything, but because he's a doctor and helping and healing is quite literally his entire thing, and damn, did he heal the hell out of us...suspiciously so.

Kuras tells us that, in Eridia, knowledge and secrets are what really fuels the area because it's so valuable. That being said, he can't get into exactly how he healed us so damn near perfectly. That also being said, he pretty much implies that the Senobium isn't all that's cracked up to be and that we aren't likely to find what we need there. Now although, we aren't fully believing of this due to desperation, he does point us in the direction of someone else. Some guy named Leander that we can find in some place called "The Wet Wick".

We follow Kuras' directions...but who the hell is--

--LEANDEEEEEEER~! HELLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO~! ...Yeeeeah, this is the one I'm gonna romance first lol. Kuras is gonna have to chill for a second.

Anyways, we're here with Leander, and what happens here is...he is so obviously a playboy, but the man is smooth as shit. I mean, damn, the man gave us flowers as soon as he laid eyes on us and was talking about some "New here? I'm certain I would've remembered a face as lovely as yours". A classic playboy line, a fuckboy move, possibly, and I always manage to gravitate towards/pick them in these damn multi-LIs stories. Back on topic though, we ask Leander about the Senobium, and, much like with Kuras, he tells us that it's not only a taboo topic, but that the place is bad news.

That being said though, he's pretty confident that he's able to find an alternative to our ailment, but that we'd have to be willing to trust him a bit, which is a tall order considering the backstory we may have chosen. We bite the bullet though, because we discovered earlier that he was a pretty damn good mage, and we're really desperate. We give into his confidence...and it actually panned out well. So well, in fact, this man, once again, takes the opportunity to spit game and puts the gold in our hands next to the gold on his coat and be like "Look, we match". That man is smoother than damned butter, and I'm down bad.

Anyways, he gets us a room to sleep in for the night, and tells us to go explore, but be careful. So we do, and we run into this guy.

Yeah, so, remember that room that Leander got for us? This guy, monster, thing just swiped the key. Lol here we go...

The thing is, we could easily get it back, but something feels...off...about him. So, we play along with his game for a bit before we're just like "A'ight, can I just get my damn key?" but he kind've avoids the topic and, of course, our desire to reach the Senobium comes up. As expected at this point, he's flatly like "It's overrated" and to simply forget about it. Well, damn...

The encounter goes for a bit more before Vere -- we finally got his name after someone called him out for causing trouble -- leaves with the someone who called after him. Despite all that we've heard about the Senobium, we can't help but see it up close and in person to at least make the journey and trials and suffering worth it.

And we do, we make it there, and we see this figure there.

But when someone calls after us for gawking at the building, the figure disappears as quickly as we saw it. Aside from this though, a feeling of hopeless kind've takes hold and we're just...it's just like damn at this point, ya know? But then something kind've weird happens.

This red-eyed woman, who is clearly supposed to be dead as apparent from this gaping hole that she showed us on her body -- no, you don't get it. It was a literal hole that you could see through -- spoke of this seaspring that could cure, quite literally, anything. Not having much faith in the Senobium anymore, but still desperate for a cure, we follow the woman and receive directions to this mysterious seaspring and are told about some gang leader named Ais.

We get there, and we come to the conclusion that someone probably lives here. We call out, there's no answer...you already know where this is going.

BUT I DID NOT EXPECT THIS MAN TO BE THIS DAMN FINE. AWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO~! Okay, okay, okay, okay, so I'm going to romance Leander first, DEFINITELY this daddy second, and Kuras is gonna be my solid third. Okay, moving on...

He -- this is Ais, by the way -- pops up and scares the shit out of us. Actually, it wasn't him that scared us, it's his loyal pack of red-eyed soulless that scares the shit out of us, and for obvious reasons. Anyways, for the sake of trying to keep this from being longer than it already is, he's actually a pretty chill dude. Once again, he is also anti-Senobium, but he is straightforward in that, "Yes, that seaspring will literally clear up whatever you've got going on, but boy, is it going to drive you batshit crazy". Well, not batshit, but it makes you a part of this thing called a "groupmind"; that explained the red-eyes. Ais described it as "one big happy family in your head". Oh...okay, so...not a good idea. Guess we weren't as desperate as we thought. He gets one of his trained soulless to take us back towards the city.

After everything that had went down today, we decided that we should officially call it a night. On our way to the room Leander funded for us, we run into some...complications.

Ah, yes. Why would we have been able to just walk across the city and to our room? That would've been too easy. Any chance that this one is tamed, too, and Ais is just messing with us again?

Oh...oh wait...this one doesn't have the red eyes. ...Yeah, we bolt. What makes this whole situation worse though? As fast as we are running, this soulless is keeping up pretty damn easily. Also, did I say that this was the worst of it? It's not, it gets so much worse actually. Tell me why, in our panic, we literally ran ourselves into a dead end. Beautiful. What are the odds we'll survive this thing a second time around?

Pretty damn high apparently. Bless this person because we were about to get one-hit'ed!

They help us up and...wait...didn't we...?

Oh yeeeeeeah! This was the person from the Senobium! ...Damn, they're short lmao. That being said, we were all:

"Yo, you were at the Senobium!"

And they were all:

"So what if I was?"

Mmm...a feisty lil stallion. Big sass. I would be, too, if I was that short. Like, damn, they are not as tall as the baes. Kuras could take their ass out with one stomp if he really wanted to.

Anyways, they scold us about being alone at night and how it's not safe and all that. We follow them for a bit, and granted, we saw that they meant business, but it's still weird that if it's so dangerous, why were they travelling alone and why did they stop to help us?

"There was a bounty on that Soulless; you were just in the way. Not killing you isn't the same as helping you." Wha--?

Well, fuck you, too then! You get romanced last, Shorty McDouche.

We essentially get spicy back, and now, they're all blushy and shit as they start walking us back to our room. Yeah, take that shit, Mhin -- their name is Mhin, by the by -- but we don't have to deal with their sass for much longer because guess who comes along?!

IT'S BAAAAAAAE!!!! .....gyatt DAYUM Mhin is short. Then again, they could be taller than or the same height as us, but we did mention that everyone was significantly taller while Mhin was "Huh...they're shorter than I thought".

Anyways, they both escort us back to the Wet Wick, and wouldn't you know it?

Not only are all the baes here, but they all apparently know each other! All those different personalities hanging out together? Well, isn't that a wild concept. Even still, since they're all here...

Maybe we can get to know one of them a little better...

END OF DEMO LOL. Well...actually there's more after this, but of course, it depends on who you go to talk to. This is definitely long enough, though, lol; you'll have to play the game yourself to find out more, not to mention all the details I left out.

Whoo, FINALLY. The summary was long, but that was because the demo was long, and it had a lot going on. I swear I excluded so much detail, you have no idea, but guys...

When I tell you that this game was so good.

When I tell you that this game was so good.

FRIENDS. When I tell you. That this game. Was so. Good.

I don't think I can emphasize that enough, and I'm not even going to lie to you, at first, I was not feeling it. It's crazy to say that now, but I swear, I was not feeling this game at first, because it was feeling real Dungeons and Dragons, and as much I want to get into that...I can't. It just never vibes with me, and it's like I can't ever effectively get into it. That being said, it was rough at first, but then--!!

Listen. The story started storying, and the baes were baeing, and I was like, there is a visual novel to be played here. I knew it was a demo when I had started it, but when I tell you that I was legitimately upset when that "Thanks for playing!" message came up? DISTRAUGHT.

Anyways, my take on the game (as if it wasn't clear enough): it was great. Fantastic, even. It's just really odd how it flows like a fantasy story book but a DnD map at the same time, and yet they made it work so beautifully. The art style; those of you that have been rocking with me know how I feel about art style. Absolutely enthralled with the art. It looks straight out of one of those DnD campaign or character books. The baes! Don't get me wrong, all of them aren't my cup of tea, but the baes that I'm feening for?! Even the ones that I'm not feening for, honestly. They are sooooo handsome. Like, I want them al-- well, I want like 3 of them, to be best friends with 1 of them, and to throw hands with the other one lol. I mean, like, they're a'ight; I'm gonna have to get to know them because they a lil' too slick at the mouth lmao, but we all know that's probably going to be the sweetest of the bunch.

But yeah, this game is legit. Again, absolutely going to spend money on this one, if that's what the full version will entail. Now, just to add a bit of degeneracy...

IF THE DEVS MAKE THIS INTO AN 18+ GAME WITH A SPICY SCENE. MY SOUL. WILL BE THEIRS.

Okay, okay, okay, anyways, but like, the game really does have mad potential. Like, look at this:

You can pick your back story, and look at what it looks like when you pick your LI!

There are routes! You pick your LI by route! Can you imagine how huge this game is going to be if there are routes for each character and choices within those routes? I am literally so excited! Run me the full release, dev(s)!

Anywho, this post is waaaaaay long, and I could ramble way more about this game, but I shall not. If you'd like to give this game a playthrough yourself -- and I'm telling you that you need to -- I'll put a link to it right here for ya. If you'd also like, you can give the dev(s) that ever desperate "Please. I need more. This game is so good. I will literally sell you my lung and both of my kneecaps. I beg" and let them know what it is! Donations are also super helpful should you be in a position and mindset to do so!

All righty, that's finally all from me! Sorry about the length on this one, but there was so much that needed to be said, and I could honestly say more. For the sake of length though, I'll leave you with this:

Play this game, but also, please remember to drink water, don't be dumb, and hope to see you around~!

TOUCHSTARVED (Demo)

[bloody-wonder]

mid-year book tag

1. Best Book You’ve Read So Far in 2024? i have read so many good ones this year but no particular one stands out to me as The Best so i'll name top 5 instead (in the order i read them in): a thousand stitches, doctrine of labyrinths, in other lands, big swiss, my brilliant friend - so, quite a range of genres and tones, as usual :)

2. Best Sequel You’ve Read So Far in 2024? the virtu is definitely my favorite part of doctrine of labyrinths and the tropic of serpents, the second book in the memoirs of lady trent, was just a perfect historical fantasy adventure novel - it's like if jane austen wrote indiana jones except it's also a nature documentary about dragons. last but not least, empire of the damned which came out in march solidified jay kristoff's empire of the vampire as my favorite vampire book series. you might have heard me screaming about it from the rooftops. all three of these sequels, i find, are even better than the previous book in their respective series.

3. New Release You Haven’t Read Yet, But Want To? i'm saving kj charles' death in the spires for the fall since it's a spooky campus murder mystery (i think?) and i also want to read apostles of mercy and so finish lindsay ellis' sci fi series (which i have lost interest in somewhat tbh but i'm nothing if not a completionist lol). i was curious about the familiar but the reviews i've seen don't look too promising so i'm probably not going to prioritize it.

4. Most Anticipated Release For Second Half of 2024? i'm looking forward to kj charles' new romance book, the duke at hazard, as well as the new evander mills mystery, rough pages, but the piece of fiction i'm anticipating the most is actually the radioapple southern gothic au by my favorite fanfic author reminiscentbells. she's going to write the whole thing this summer and start posting in september - i'm so excitedddd😱

5. Biggest Disappointment? emily wilde's encyclopaedia of faeries is the book equivalent of a ghoul wearing the skin of your beloved. i wasn't a fan of a deadly education either😒 was very excited to read gaywyck but the expectations of "jane eyre but gay" which the cover of that book gave me were unfortunately not met🤷‍♀️

6. Biggest Surprise? i didn't think i might be into extreme horror and neither did i fancy myself a sally rooney girlie so i was quite surprised that i liked her conversations with friends as well as the sluts by dennis cooper. will definitely read more from both authors next year. an even bigger surprise however was solitaire which i picked up on a whim after tori came out as ace in the last heartstopper volume. i have a complicated relationship with alice oseman's books mostly due to the fact that i'm years past the target demographic age but still feel compelled to read them bc it seems they're the only mainstream books with prominent aro/ace rep out there. so i didn't expect much and was astonished to discover that tori spring is like looking at a mirror reflection of my 18yo self - uncanny in a fun way. ig i shouldn't be so surprised this turned out to be my favorite oseman book since it's the one with the most mixed reviews lol people like to hate a depressed teenage girl😬

7. Favorite New Author? i have devoured doctrine of labyrinths and the cemeteries of amalo in february so now i can safely say sarah monette aka katherine addison is one of my favorite authors. each of her series has a different tone but there are consistent themes of real or magical disability and non amatonormative relationships which are explored in creative ways throughout her stories. i also like her worldbuilding quite a bit, especially the naming systems and fantasy terminology. i read more books by celeste ng as well as by vale aida - both are likely to become favorite authors too. in the latter's case - provided she writes a sequel to hostis. if not, i shall never forgive her😅

8. Newest Favorite Character? okay this is just impossible to narrow down! first of all, liathe from empire of the damned bc i want her Gender: wearing a porcelain mask and a splendid crimson coat, formally bowing to her adversaries before she beats the shit out of them with her blood sword, referring to herself by the royal we and hissing every time she speaks - character of all time material right there. behold my beautiful girl who has done nothing wrong!🥰

(official illustrations by bon orthwick)

secondly, elliot schafer bc he's the most obnoxious prickly boy in other lands and yet everyone wants him carnally lol. i adore his internal monologue - probably the best i've read in ya. his dialogue too tbh - his cutting repartee game is off the charts. honestly, he's just my favorite type of character: a mean bisexual gremlin who scolds people so creatively that they fall in love with him on the spot. what more can you ask.

finally, i have to mention that to my great surprise i liked mildmay more than felix harrowgate🤯 idk felix is this cunty traumatized savant which is a character archetype i'm used to liking so it was a safe bet. the opposites attract sidekick or love interest of such a character is usually not my cup of tea but mildmay is the exception that proves the rule ig. mostly it's bc of his unusual manner of speaking with those funny slang turns of phrase and just generally the contrast between his expressive internal monologue and his reserved demeanor. as a result, he easily rivals felix as the most interesting guy in the book. such excellent character work! taking my hat off to monette🎩

9. Newest Fictional Crush? i reserve this question for that special kind of obsession only a very particular character can inspire and this year it's alastor from hazbin hotel. which, i know, is not a book but i have read so much alastor fanfic in the last few months that he's basically like a book character to me at this point lol

💕Best Ship💕 elliot schafer and luke sunborn are very cute. i don't usually go for cute but here we are. especially after reading that short story from luke's pov i realized i just need more of these two together😌 felix and mildmay with their unholy magic bdsm union - need i say more? forbidden ship that watered my crops. last but not least, i'm currently trudging through the realm of the elderings bc of fitz and the fool and as of assassin's quest it finally started paying off: i'm being queerbaited and asking for more🥲

10. Book That Made You Cry? a thousand stitches is such a wholesome cozy book and it made me cry multiple times the way that a nostalgic movie from childhood can make you cry sometimes. especially the pug scene😭 the scenes of thara celehar walking the corn maze in the cemeteries of amalo made me cry a lot too. the symbolic depths addison is able to achieve with the labyrinth motif, the exploration of grief and forgiveness and letting go - unparalleled🤌

11. Book That Made You Happy? a thousand stitches made me happy! especially the pug scene!!😅 honestly it was like watching a disney movie back when they were good except also more relatable bc atwater's characters read neurodivergent and aspec-coded to me. love how she maintains that the kiss of true love that breaks the faerie curse doesn't have to be romantic. re-reading the three musketeers made me very happy too - it's one of my top 10 favorite books of all time and i was kinda nervous i might not like it as much as an adult. well the joke's on me bc now i can confirm it's one of the best books ever written😊 reading in other lands and big swiss cheered me up a lot too bc they're just so damn funney😄

12. Favorite Book Adaptation You Saw This Year? haven't seen a lot of adaptations so ig dune part two wins by default. twas a fine movie. the wheel of time is also a nice show in my opinion but i didn't read the source material so idk how good it is adaptation-wise🤷‍♀️

13. Favorite Review You’ve Written This Year? my favorite ones are probably the ones i wrote about the three musketeers and in other lands but i think i also wrote some good critical/negative reviews of the mask of mirrors and of the vorkosigan books i read this year (1 2 3)

14. Most Beautiful Cover? behold the cover of the voyage of the basilisk!🤩 i want to frame it and hang it on my wall so that i can gaze at it adoringly and connect with my inner ishmael

(art by todd lockwood)

i also like this vintage romance cover of gaywyck and the uk covers of the farseer trilogy. it's a shame that the books are not as good as the covers led me to believe. especially in the case of gaywyck - this cover is Such A Vibe! but alas

15. What Books Do You Need To Read By The End of The Year? in terms of series i want to finish the memoirs of lady trent, read one more witcher book, at least a couple vampire chronicles and then reread swordspoint and hopefully complete that series too. other fantasy i want to get to at last is fire & blood and the hands of the emperor - both are big and intimidating tho. for my classics challenge i need to finish a couple of tomes i'm reading slowly throughout the year and then also read the name of the rose. american psycho and mona awad's bunny have been on my tbr for ages - maybe i'll finally read them this fall. and i also want to finish reading kj charles' backlist bc the completionism drive is stronger than the fear of having no kj charles to read lol

i never do things a normal amount - every time i take up new media i go all in. so i had a musicals phase, a movies phase, a tv show phase - each lasting a few years and then i barely watched any of these once the phase ended. which is why i've been wondering if my current Book Phase is about to wrap up soon but, given how many books i managed to read since january, it sure doesn't seem that way. instead, it feels like the more i read the better i am at finding books that i'm likely to enjoy - which leads to more reading. and i cannot complain about that tbh😁📚

tagging @magpiefngrl @doh-rae-me @oliviermiraarmstrongs @fugitoidkry @pinkasrenzo @counterwiddershins @figuringthengsout @sugarbabywenkexing @fandomreferencepending @venndaai @weirdsociology @sixappleseeds @theodoradove

please tell me what you've been reading this year (if you want)! one can't have too many book recs👀

goodreads │ old mid year tags 2020 2021 2022 2023