#episode: guilty pleasures

[cryscendo]

the ABCs of KEH: G IS FOR… GIFTS

Kurt, they’re beautiful. But what are they for?

You killed your audition, Blaine. If anyone else got Tony, including me, the Wrath of Sondheim would fall upon William McKinley like a plague of Shubert Alley locusts. These are to celebrate you. [insp]

[gleesongtournament]

[jauntilyplacedcaps]

[respectthepetty]

I can only watch one show today, so in normal trashy fashion, I picked my Wattpad BL Bad Guy My Boss because I'm ecstatic that PAT had a girlfriend while Elyes has been the gayest motherfucker in all the lands since Day One! Look at him. He doesn't understand bisexuality! He can't even fathom a man wanting to sleep with a woman.

I love this Black Brooder pendejo who won't let his Heavenly Human secretary resign yet won't actually communicate that he loves him.

And it's because I get him! He was so light before and watched his boyfriend just get darker. He communicated everything! His worries. He dreams. HIS LOVE!

Yet Run didn't say he loved him back, and regardless of Run's reasons, he hurt Elyes.

Even at the very end, with a clear barrier between them, Run couldn't even admit that he ever loved Elyes.

So despite how happy Elyes is with Pat,

He will use any means possible to avoid telling Pat the simple truth.

I don't know if Run actually loves Fei Long, but Elyes is now incapable of telling Pat what he wants to because of the way his relationship with Run blew up.

Elyes wants to lighten up!

But he can't for too long because life always reminds him that Pat could be snatched away if he isn't stalking him 90% of the time.

And Lord forbid Elyes go to therapy for his dark past of trust issues! No! Instead, he will threaten Pat as his boss because that is all Elyes has to fall back on, which is why he refuses to let Pat resign.

Thank goodness Pat is a smart cookie, but even when Elyes can't get at Pat directly, he forces others to track him down and make Pat come back to him.

Elyes continues to tell Kim that Pat is the best secretary who he can't live without instead of just owning up to the fact that he loves Pat, but Elyes. Cannot. Do. That!

Pat has always been honest in his relationships, and for it, he has been rewarded with a healthy breakup due to long distance, but Elyes has not! He was honest, and for his honesty, he got his heart ripped out and stomped on.

So he is going to continue to do The Most™ in attempt to avoid doing the bare minimum.

But Pat keeps proving that all he wants is the simple life.

Which is why I'm proud that Elyes, in his attempt to be light, learned his lesson regarding food and continues to bring the two of them closer by eating meals on tinier tables.

Because the first episode emphasized one of the problems was the fact that the distance kept growing between them as the tables got bigger and longer.

And he also picked up his phone just to tell Kim he was busy with another man, which isn't perfect, but is a hell of lot better than him leaving Pat to go to Kim. Evolution doesn't happen overnight for a Black Brooder.

As far as I'm concerned, Elyes is doing everything right according to his color because some Black Brooders are far more comfortable being arrogant assholes.

Who do not utilize space appropriately!

Which is why I want to know why Run, who is dark around Elyes, is so light around Fei Long. Is it really love?! Or is it Maybelline blackmail?

But shit is getting messy before that question can be answered, and now my color-coded boys in a situationship (since Elyes refuses to say love) are being visited by thots of Booty Calls Past AT WORK.

And by the looks of that big ass barrier between these exes, I don't think Elyes is going to lighten up after this conversation.

Because just like bisexuality and viewing women as attractive, Elyes doesn't seem to understand what a healthy relationship or healthy conversation looks like.

I love him.

[locustime]

“I know after last time, Grian, you lost your HotGuy poster. But don’t worry! I got you a new one!”

A friend of mine requested some Buttercups!

[caliblorn]

Cursed to imagine my favourite characters break into a musical number

[onion-morty]

he was so me fr

Morty canonically loved to write so I like to think he probably started off somewhere like in RP chats and wattpad or smn like a normal 14 yr old kid, eventually moving to ao3 (like i did LMAO AM I PROJECTING). His writing would have some errors, a little unpolished but its got heart

Rick probably stumbled upon his acc when Morty left his laptop open and idk, we all know Rick loves to snoop hes a rascal w no boundaries lol

Probably would be judgy abt it at first and laugh at the clumsy writing, something he'd pull up for a little light hate-reading. But despite the clumsiness Mortys writing's got legs. It would be funny if Rick actually looks forward to the next chapter. Like 4am hes crying over the latest update when it was revealed that Brick lost his family before meeting Max. And the story is riddled with spelling mistakes and excessive exclamation marks so the dissonance is real hahdhjakaj.

He makes a code that can give multiple kudos from one account.

Idk I just want an inverse of the crewcoo's morty heist episode where Rick actually supports Morty's hobbies :((

[halyorke-vampiredisaster]

Thank you zdf for supplying me with the most cheesy, kinda gory, a bit stupid (affectionately), very retro feeling (that genre mix is not cool anymore) vampire show in 2024 😭

It was fabulous, truly

[softquietsteadylove]

I have another idea (sorry if this is too spammy, please tell me if it's too much) also sorry if this one is a bit dark, my life long love of true crime is showing. so human au, Thena and Gil have been married for years, Thena has a history of mental health problems but specially seeing/hearing things that aren't there so when she starts talking about someone following her that nobody eles can see people are skeptical, until one day she goes missing, the police don't do much at first because she's a grown woman but then letters start showing up from someone who claims to have her, Gil is frantic trying to find his wife and he feels like he's slowly losing his mind, maybe a hopeful yet open ended end with potential to be expanded. Damm this one is long, sorry

Gil crouched down behind the shrubs as another car passed. He knew very well he could get in a lot of trouble for this. Technically, the cops were supposed to be doing this.

Well, the cops were supposed to be investigating his wife's disappearance. What he thought they were doing was instead standing around with their dicks in their hands talking about how 'wives leave their husbands all the time without explanation'. They didn't know Thena. And they didn't know him either.

And he was damn sure they didn't know Kro. He had mentioned that Thena had an abusive ex-boyfriend who was obsessed with her, but they didn't care. All they saw was that Thena had a diagnosis of schizophrenic episodes. It was more than enough for them to write off her reports of being followed as paranoia.

Gil moved closer to the house. He had been watching for days.

If this bastard was going to stalk Thena then he could do the same. He had watched Kro, watched when he left the house--seldom. Watched what he did when he did go places--always for basic needs like food, never anywhere else. If he had a job, it was remote, or he had quit it to become a full time freak and kidnapping felon.

It started with Thena saying she was being followed. And he had tried to catch a glimpse, but he had never managed to get a look at what she had seen. But she said it wasn't a vision, that she knew what those felt like and this was different. She said it was tall, and that it was watching her.

It certainly sounded like Kro at the time, and the letters confirmed it was him, as far as Gil was concerned. They were printed computer paper, generic and untraceable. They said things like 'I have her' and 'she's mine now'. Cops didn't have proof it was from him, or even about Thena.

Gil knew better. It was the way someone obsessive and possessive would talk about someone. It felt like Kro, saying to her now-husband that she was his, her ex-boyfriend's, again. According to the cops, Kro had an alibi which eliminated him as a suspect. They hadn't even held him for 24 hours.

Gil stuck his finger into the crack of the window being left open. He had found a day when they were left open and stuck a twig in the slider to keep it from latching. It sounded insane, he knew. He was behaving criminally. But he didn't care what he had to do to get Thena back.

He pushed the window up, slipping through slowly. He had done his research. He knew that there was no alarm system because he had a creepy looking dog walking around. The dog would trip any motion sensor that was active.

Said dog lifted its head. It looked like a malnourished, mangy thing. Gil pulled the chicken out of his pocket. If this thing was supposed to be a guard dog, it wasn't very well trained. It hadn't even barked before he tossed the dog toy full of chicken at it. It was some kind of special puzzle, supposedly it would keep a dog busy for hours.

He moved slowly and carefully. The house had a basement, there were little barred windows on the front at the base and the rest of the houses on the street did too. If Thena was anywhere, he had to assume she was there.

"Thena?" he whispered. He was pretty damn sure Kro was upstairs doing his remote work in a home office at the far end of the house.

It was almost foolhardy: man kidnapped a woman and was arrogant enough to leave her two floors down from him all day and night?

"Thena," Gil whispered again as gently twisted the basement door handle. It wasn't even locked. He glanced down, it was pitch black, depriving Thena completely of any comfort. His steps were careful, he didn't want to make the stairs creak too much.

He walked down carefully. He had no proof Kro wasn't just sitting down here, lying in wait for him. And worse yet, he had to be ready for what he might find. He didn't think Kro would hurt Thena, but he didn't have proof that he wouldn't.

"Thena," Gil whispered again. He looked around, hoping his eyes would adjust. Those little windows must have been blacked out as well as barred.

"Gil?"

His heart leapt. He reached in his pocket for his phone. Pulling it out he swung it around with the flashlight on. The basement was actually not so bad, at least more than a dirt floor cellar. His gut twisted, "Thena."

She squinted, although he moved the light away from her, just lighting the corner of the basement that was hers. She was handcuffed to a support post, seated on what seemed to be an old mattress. It looked like the blanket she had been given was one for the dog, and the pillow was somehow worse than that.

"Okay, sweetheart, it's okay, I'm here," Gil rushed, kneeling down and immediately reaching for the handcuff. He had looked this up too, purchasing a cheap pair with keys online just in case.

Thena lurched forward, barely able to hold herself up enough to bury her sobs into his chest.

"I'm here, I'm here," he repeated, stroking her hair. She was in the same clothes she had been wearing friday. It was 37 hours later. He must have gotten her right as she was coming out of her office and before Gil had pulled up to the curb. It was such a slim window.

"Gil," she whispered into his hoodie. She dug her fingers into it, but her nails were bloody. She had tried getting the nail to which her cuffs were attached out of the wooden column. "He told me he would let me go if I promised to leave you."

"It's okay, honey, I've got you," he whispered. Of course this psycho wanted to play some sick game like that. He probably would have let her go, too. Nothing had been proven to link back to him yet, and he knew very well that no one would believe Thena about it.

He didn't have to have her. He just needed no one else to.

Gil rubbed her wrist, which was red and raw from her struggling. He pressed his nose to her hair, "sweetie, did he hurt you?"

"No," she whimpered, to at least some of his relief. "He hasn't touched me. He said he would let me out of here if I told him I never loved you."

Gil had read up on that. Kro was a narcissist, he needed to feel in possession and control. He wanted to know that Thena couldn't be with anyone else the way she had been with him. But they had been married for five years by now, in comparison to the year and a half she had been with Kro, including courtship and the lengthy process of Thena changing all her contacts and moving as far away from him as possible. Only for him to follow her here.

There was no use wondering about it. Gil pulled his hoodie off and wrapped it around her. "Have you been down here since friday?"

She nodded, barely conscious as he threaded her arms through the sleeves. "After work..."

"Did he give you any food or water?"

She shook her head again as he zipped it all the way up. "He would only come down every few hours to check if I was ready to give up."

Gil held her cheeks. He did his best to smile at her instead of crying. "And you never broke. That's my Thena."

She sighed as he kissed her forehead. "Take me home."

"Okay," he whispered. He pulled out a mini bottle of water, just enough to keep her conscious. He also pulled out a baggy with two pills. "Here y'go."

It wasn't an immediate concern, but it couldn't hurt to get her medication into her as soon as possible. Thena took them instinctively.

"Can you walk?" Gil whispered to her. This was the next step he had prepared for. There were a few different actions to take depending on her answer.

She shook her head. Even if he could have gotten her on her feet, she was weak, hadn't eaten or slept, and Kro had taken her shoes.

"Okay," he resolved. He buttoned the cargo pockets of his pants again and crouched down to get Thena in his arms. It was ideal to be ready to fight if he had to, but he wasn't about to sling his wife over his shoulder like old laundry.

Thena pressed her head to his chest as he lifted her.

"Let's get you home, sweetheart."

"You're not going anywhere!"

Gil froze. Thena was in his arms. His phone in his shirt pocket was still the only source of light. Kro was at the top of the stairs. He didn't seem armed, but Kro was 6'5" and decently muscled in his own right. He didn't think he needed a weapon. "It's over."

"It's not," the monster growled at him. He didn't even sound human. "Put her down."

Gil held her tighter as Thena buried her face in his neck. "She's my wife, Kro."

"She's a liar!" he bellowed at them and charged down the stairs to the bottom. "She said she would never get married and she lied!"

Who would want to marry a beast like this? Gil backed up just a step. "That's enough."

"Put her down!"

He really did match the description. Thena had said that a figure had started following her. That it was massive, way higher than six feet, shadowy and lurking around corners to follow her. And none of her visions had ever looked as monstrous as this man did now.

Gil did, but only so he could keep her away from him. He set her down on the mattress again, as much as she tried to cling to him. But he turned around, swinging his fist wide in the hopes of getting him in the face.

Kro did stumble back, but he was far from done.

Gil charged at him. If this was really going to be a fist fight to the death, then he was prepared for that, so long as Thena didn't get hurt in the meantime.

Kro snarled at him as they back into one of a few shelves scattered around the room. Junk and a few loose tools clattered to the ground. Kro clawed at his back but Gil slammed him into the shelf again.

He heard Thena cry out behind him as Kro tossed him away. He tried to stand but Kro sent him into another shelf, this one with paint cans. "I'll kill you!"

"Go to hell!" Gil yelled back at him. He grabbed whichever paint can he could swing, even an empty one. It did the job at least. He scrambled past Kro to Thena. "Go, run, I'm right behind you, go!"

"Gil, no!"

Gil hissed as Kro found his dropped phone and shined the light in his eyes. Next thing he knew, something that felt an awful lot like an empty paint can was colliding with his head. "Shit!"

Kro landed one hell of a punch to his jaw.

"Gil!"

He tried to stay on his feet. He couldn't see and his head was screaming at him. But he came here for a reason: for his wife. "Thena, run!"

His vision was just barely starting to bleed back to him. He could see Kro's massive silhouette. He got his hands up, ready to fight, when a flash of silver arched through his vision.

Thena connected the hammer with Kro's skull so solidly it was audible. She was breathing heavily, probably lightheaded. She looked at Kro's body, watching to see if it moved at all. Then she looked at him.

Gil eyed Kro as well, but he was out like a light. A hammer to the head was hard to beat, he honestly wasn't even sure if he was still alive. He looked at Thean, "sweetie, it's okay."

Thena stumbled back, dropping the hammer. She looked at him, "a-are you okay?"

Gil dragged himself to his feet. He wobbled a little, his knees being worse for wear (he wasn't young anymore). "I'm okay, are you?"

Thena moved numbly, stumbling into his embrace again, still looking at Kro. "Is he alive?"

"I don't know," Gil stared, even as he pressed his lips to her forehead again. "Let's get you outta here first, okay?"

Thena nodded, letting him herd her towards the stairs. "What do we do now?"

He had committed a crime, breaking and entering to get his wife back like this. Although maybe they could get lucky considering Thena was just defending herself against a certified psycho. Either way, he was leaving with his wife. "I don't know. You don't have to worry about that. We're just going to get you home."

[driftingmoonmenace]

So that TSAMS episode today, huh?

[cryscendo]

kurt hummel in every performance

4x17 - Guilty Pleasures

Mamma Mia - Various Artists

[gleesongtournament]

Glee Song Tournament Round 1

[jauntilyplacedcaps]

[respectthepetty]

Elyes/Elias gave Pat head, so I forgive him for all his rich boy antics.

Elyes is a giver . . . of forehead kisses, blowjobs, and problems. He is multi-talented.

He is also light. Even though he is still grumpy, he is the lightest he has been after having sex with Pat.

So, of course, this Black Brooder has to ruin it by being mean and distant to his Happy Human secretary since he cannot sort out his feelings.

He demands to see Kim and puts back on the black like its armor, yet he takes it off and hands it to Kim once it's clear Kim is there for sex.

And he shows up to grab his drunk Happy Human who, just like Elyes, has shed his jacket and color throughout the night.

Both of them are lost in whatever is happening between them. Pat is grey. Elyes is light.

And the mood is just right for head . . . kisses? Kisses on the head! And tears.

Nothing happens, and Pat wakes up in a different grey shirt because not having sex only makes everything murkier.

But just like before when Elyes stayed the night, he remains light.

Well, at least until he gets back to work.

He is upset that Pat didn't stay home, and that Pat is interviewing a person who will probably become his replacement.

Because no matter how light these other boys are, none of them can replace Pat.

And I think that pisses Elyes off; therefore, he must brood.

Pat has always been the balance Elyes needs, but now that the line between them has been crossed, neither one of them knows how to act.

Is this a moment to bite off each other's heads, to give head kisses, or to give head? The Wattpad BL doesn't know and neither do the characters.

So Pat is going to quit in an effort to distance himself from the man who is making his world darker.

And Elyes is going to brood about it.

[shenlis-spear]

THE LEGEND OF SHEN LI 与凤行, 2024

⇢ starring: zhao liying, lin gengxin

If I loved you less, I might be able to talk about it more. (I'm talking about The Legend of Shen Li)

Let me preface this by saying I'm biased. And it's been a million years since I tried to put my thoughts into writing so this is gonna be all over the place and long-winded. And probably wouldn't make any sense. So here it goes.

I really enjoyed The Legend of Shen Li. Do I love it? With all my charred heart. Do I think it's the best drama this year? It's still April. It's hard to say. Are Shen Li and Xing Zhi the best power couple? This shouldn't even be a debate.

Honestly, I didn't even plan to chase this drama while it's ongoing because I binge watching drama is what I enjoy best. However, I was bored. And The Legend of Shen Li's trailer looked interesting. And my heart still needs healing from the mess of an ending that is Princess Agents. I needed closure. So I started watching the drama, and boy oh boy did it drag me down one hell of a roller coaster ride of emotions every single night. (No, I'm not complaining.)

However, before I talk about the things that I really loved about the drama, I have some things to say about the stuff that kind of irked me. Because no drama is perfect (unless it's Nirvana in Fire).

So let me get started on the things that I feel like the drama could've done better.

Musical scoring - the OST's? Chef's kiss. However, they way they're putting music on the scenes are a hit and miss. Most of the time it just distracts me from the scene and I just get bored with the mv-ish scene. I wish cdramas especially custom ones would stop this. I don't need 5 mins of the leads staring at each other in all angles accompanied by a really nice song. I'm here to watch a drama. Although, I kinda did get used to it in the latter episodes (specifically ep35-38) because I definitely needed a minute or two to process the emotions.

The progression of the story - One thing. I'm confused. Not to the point that "I don't understand the plot confusing" but still confusing nonetheless. There was no consistency in the scenes and the dialogues. (Ex fishing village). There was no flow. I feel like someone messed up the storyboard and when they edited the scenes they were also confused. Or maybe this is the issue of the translation of the dialogue? I don't even know. Still, I definitely think this part could've been done better.

The internal monologues - sigh when I said the thing I love most in dramas are their dialogues I don't mean what's happening in The Legend of Shen Li. The characters just talk (or think?) too damn much I can't keep up. They're supposed to be the characters whom their actions should tell the story but the way they're narrating the whole plot to me is just so jarring. Am I watching a drama or listening to an audiobook? Sometimes I can't tell. I wish they'd tone it down but it just got worse with the later episodes.

The camera - this is just me being nitpicky but there are some random camera angles especially the spinning ones that probably is supposed to make the scene dramatic but all it did was make me wanna vomit.

This is not in any way, shape, or form hating on the drama because I genuinely enjoyed it. I've deluded myself into waiting for a Princess Agents S2 but I got a better deal and had Zhao Liying and Lin Gengxin to reunite in a new project which is better in my opinion because Princess Agents is a hot mess. There was really no saving that one.

So moving on to the things I like! But like, where do I even start?

First of all, Zhao Liying and Lin Gengxin. Chemistry so good, they had to be casted in another drama. Everything about them was just so perfect for the drama and the role. Could not ask for a more perfect casting than them. The 7 year wait was almost worth it.

The WOMEN! - so much room for improvement regarding the characters but I loved that the women were not treated as damsels who always needed saving. I have to say 5 1/2 braincells were working throughout the drama, 2 from Shen Li, 1 from You Lan, 1 from Jin Niang Zi and 1 from Shen Mu Yue (1/2 from Xing Zhi because he's too unbothered if it's not related to Shen Li).

Shen Li - might not be the best female character in cdramaland but I think she can hold her own place. She's stubborn, a bit reckless but she's loyal and righteous. She's a strong woman without being a stereotypical cold and ruthless strong woman. Shen Li is a strong woman at the same time also a mad woman in love. She does not have to be one or the other. The more I write this the more I'm falling in love with her character. You just don't find a character like her. She is Shen Li. A capable general. A strong leader. An empathetic comrade. A respectful student. A woman in love. She is not just one of them but all of them.

Lin Gengxin is pretty believable playing as an ancient god. He has that air around him that screams your highness. He played the lofty and aloof Xing Zhi to perfection.

And what can I even say about Zhao Liying? As always miss ma'am played Shen Li perfectly. Whimsical, stubborn, in love and devasted in love, you can feel all those emotions just watching her eyes.

It has angst but not too much that we as viewers would spend multiple episodes pulling out hair of frustration about the misunderstandings and accidental killings. (Not a shade to any specific drama but just to the xanxia genre in general). It has the perfect balance of angst, romance and comedy. You laugh, cry and giggle all in one episode. The comic relief scenes are naturally funny and doesn't feel forced. Zhao Liying and Lin Gengxin's comedic timing are 👌.

The conflict was handled maturely and the confession was direct but still heart fluttering. Throughout the drama, they both got their heads perfectly placed on their shoulders.

The last episode! Let us talk about the last episode because when has a drama provided that kind of fan service just making one whole episode of shenanigans and fluff. After going through the angst, the reward that is the last episode is just too good and definitely worth all the tears.

Also, can we talk about Dong Jie's guest role? I know miss ma'am is good but when I tell you I cried for a minute because of her story arc? Just hands up and mic drop. So so good!

Now that all of these are out of my system, hopefully I can move on to the next obsession, whatever that may be. I'll still probably watch episode 39 on a daily basis though. It's just too enjoyable and it makes my day. Will probably, revisit this "review" in the future and update it because I'm aware that at this point it's not making a lot of sense.

RATING: 9/10 REWATCH VALUE: 10/10 definitely would watch again! ACTING: 10/10 CATEGORY: GUILTY PLEASURE

[horror-aesthete]

Dracula, 2020, dir. Jonny Campbell

SE01E01 The Rules of the Beast