#episode 1 and I am blown away by how good it is

[doyou000me]

[gvenevera]

Kuroshitsuji Musical ~ 寄宿学校の秘密 (Secrets of the Boarding School) 2024 ~ VERA’S REVIEW!

Yes you read that right! I’ve had the most fateful chance to watch the very first performance of the newest Kuromyu in Hyogo last Saturday, so I figured I’ll eternalize some of my best memories here.

Before we begin: the LIVE STREAMING is available for the LAST PERFORMANCE, September 29th 2024, HERE! For only 3800 yen, you’ll get to watch it live at home, or watch it later for up to 1 week (October 6th)! Apparently you need a Japanese VPN though, if anyone knows how to navigate the site, please do share.

A few disclaimers from me:

*Anti-shippers DNI. This post barely has any shipping content at all but I don’t like people who harass others over fictional preferences. I’m a shipper, I can’t help being biased for my OTPs.

**Since photos were prohibited in the venue, I’ve included stage pictures featured in official news websites or accounts.

***This is by no means a critical review but merely a fangirl’s ramblings, and I often drew comparisons to the original stage play Kuroshitsuji Musical: Secrets of the Boarding School (2021). For reference, I suggest you watch it first! I intentionally avoided rewatching the 2021 version close to the airing date though, so my memories may not be accurate. Also my Japanese is mediocre so I apologize if there were important dialogues I didn’t catch.

Introduction

I know, sorry for the dilly-dally intro. But I’d like to first stress that ever since I started following Kuroshitsuji in my first year of university (like 9 years ago now lmao), I’ve ALWAYS dreamed to watch the stage musical live in person. When 2024’s performance was announced immediately after the last episode of the anime, I was overjoyed to see that our old cast was coming back.

And it was fate that gave me the opportunity - my scheduled work program this year was set to be in Kyoto AND during September! Needless to say, I had the Kuromyu ticket bought and reserved first, before my confirmation with the Kyoto office or my visa and plane ticket. Priorities, right?

Quick remark on the ticket process: I hit a snag right in the beginning because the ticket reservation website Eplus required a Japanese phone number to sign up. I contacted multiple people (middle school friend whose brother used to work in Japan, another who was quarter-Japanese, several dealer websites with high rate exchanges), until I settled on my roommate’s friend from high school who was currently working there. Many thanks to her and my roommate for the help!

She took care of registration for me - even so the advance sales was a LOTTERY ticket! We fortunately got the lucky draw - I saw many Japanese fans on X who were not so lucky, while others bought in bulk to sell later. Then, I used the online barcode to exchange for a paper ticket when I arrived in Japan on September 1st. That’s when I get to know my seat number - 3rd floor, 2nd row B. A very far position from the stage, but it’s alright because we’re here for the atmosphere anyway!

The performances for the first 2 days were set in Hyogo Performing Arts Center, KOBELCO grand hall. I’ve honestly never been to any kind of music performance (or even concerts) in my life, so I was blown away by the sheer size of the venue.

By 10 AM, the audience was trickling in. I was in awe of the fact that you can tell who was coming in to watch kuromyu - beautiful women dressed in black-and-white tones, many even sporting gothic lolita bows and dresses to keep up with the Victorian England theme. In fact, it felt like the whole of Ikebukuro were gathered here in this very building!

We were ushered into the hall entrance at 11 AM and let me tell you, the crowd was suffocating! In front of the theater, there was a goods section for Kuromyu merch. I’m so glad I took the time to queue up because it seems some of the merch were starting to sell out by the second day. The booth clerk looked perplex to see a non-Japanese customer here though. Here’s how the line looked like, and this was still early before most of the audiences got in:

(We’re not supposed to take any photos but I saw the warning signs too late…Here’s a view from where I was sitting on the third floor.)

I realized then as we were settling in that some ladies around me had binoculars!! Well how was I supposed to know you could bring those here, instead of trying to find those fancy opera glasses!?! Ah well, I was lucky that I’d recently had my prescription glasses updated and the seat to my left was vacant, so I could lean in to see the center better.

The Performance

While it is true that you can barely see the actors’ faces from the balcony seats, it was the grandness of the performance itself that blew me away. For the first time I could see the stage in all its entirety, all the actors dancing in synchronization, and the special effects…oh it had improved A LOT from 3 years prior!

The stage sets for Weston may look a tad “crowded” in the still photo, as compared to the original where they used white backgrounds but in reality, it blended in so prettily with the flashing stage lights. The middle section was a rotating floor and one of my memorable scenes was where Ciel and Sebastian were discussing their plans while crossing the rotating stage, to give the illusion of “strolling across the school grounds.” Sounds like a simple trick but if looked amazing from above.

On to the story itself - the execution actually barely changed from the 2021 rendition, which for me, was a relief! Now I know, some would argue a rerun should add in different elements, because who would want to see the same thing twice right? From past experiences with Kuromyu, the reruns tend to be hit or miss - different actors, different song remixes, voice changes, and so on. For this performance, I could barely tell that the cast (apart from Ciel, Sebastian and Undertaker) were all new members. Everyone got into character flawlessly!

The story of course followed the entirety of the Public School Arc. The script and choreography was almost identical to the 2021 stage musical version. If you would remember, this Kuroshitsuji arc was the first to be portrayed on stage before the anime adaptation - same as previously, they seemed to take inspiration from the manga only rather than the anime.

Some key moments from the play:

The opening sequence was again a recap of the previous arcs - Jack the Ripper (Lycoris that Blazed the Earth), Book of Circus (Noah’s Ark Circus), Book of the Atlantic (Tango on the Campania). I’ve always loved this part because you could tell they slipped in iconic themes from the past musicals.

Perfect Black: the main theme, and my favorite from this stage! I’m so happy to have heard it live! *swoons* Thank god they didn’t do anything weird to remix it. The whole cast dancing together was beautiful! However I thought 2021 did it better with the dramatic light focus on Sebastian during the chorus drop.

Ciel’s Earl of Phantomhive outfit was changed from the glittery blue suit to a blue-green checkered coat this year. (I’d have bought his Earl photoshoot set if I knew it beforehand) Yana-sensei later tweeted that she was the one to re-design it, to better match Eito. Then Eito Konishi himself replied, saying he was honored to play as Ciel Phantomhive, to which Yana-sensei praised his singing and called him “Eito-bocchan” …boy was he fanboying hard over that. He’s one of us!!

Arrival at Weston: I don’t have a comment on the P4 in particular, they were all straightforward from the manga. I think I like Redmond’s character the most here, he looked very pretty with the side-ponytail and while he was a show-off still, he wasn’t as annoying or arrogant as I somehow expected.

A notable interaction: Violet forcing Greenhill to pose for him at the swan gazebo. Greenhill’s actor really looked strained trying to keep an upside down bridge pose (Edward was supporting his back, but kept getting distracted). When he broke the pose and got up, Violet hit him over the head with his sketchbook so hard that the thump echoed through the hall.

As for the Prefect’s Fags: Edward and Cheslock were giving off some suspiciously gay rivals-to-lovers vibes over here. Which I kinda vibed with, I hope they kept the energy into the Blue Cult Arc!

One important thing: they kept the ALL the Fag lines! Which in Japanese accent also kinda sounded like them repeatedly calling each other “Fućk”. Oh how I wish the anime had kept those!

Soma Asman Kadar: now this guy deserves an ovation just for himself. Not only did he kill the role, he was also the funniest! Soma’s song was greatly improved and lengthened with catchier music and dancing - when his troupe “arrived” at Weston, he even dragged Ciel and Clayton to join in. I can’t do it justice, you have GOT to see those two English gentlemen crack the Indian dance moves! His pestering of Maurice Cole was hilarious and he kept exasperating Ciel out of his character, their chemistry was wonderful. I really didn’t expect to get hooked by Soma in this arc out of all people! Too bad Agni wasn’t here.

Maurice Cole’s miniarc - Flawless. Sometimes I wonder if he was an easy character to play just because his character trait is so extremely over-the-top lol.

The library kabedon scene and sebaciel burning Purple House scene didn’t exist. Another scene cut off from the last musical was where Clayton and the Blue House kids were congratulating Ciel on his fag duties and Sebastian took the chance to blend in with them. Sadly that was one of my favorite adlibs.

Ciel’s dream sequence: this was originally in the 2021 musical. After a talk with Macmillain made him revisit his past trauma, Ciel “dreamed” of the cultists, and Sebastian’s close call with Undertaker in BotA. I actually forgot about this part when I watched it in theater - the highlight was sebaciel reenacting the scene in BotA where they reached for each other, the enactment surprisingly gave me the impression of Ciel’s “worry” over Sebastian’s “vulnerability” here. Unlike the 2021 version though, Undertaker didn’t pull Ciel into a bridal carry or referenced the R!Ciel wake-up scene as clearly.

The second half after the break was the long-awaited Cricket Match. Like the previous version, there was no scene of Ciel jumping into Master Michaelis’ arms, but I think they just couldn’t fit that one into the sequence. The cricket songs were mostly the same as the original - with an improvement being them cutting out Red House’s random beauty pageant contest. It actually felt like the cricket match went by faster this time, which was a win in my book. I’ve heard people complain of Kuromyu 2021 being a “Prince of Cricket” musical, hence the bad reviews back then.

The laxative meat pie scene was hilarious. From Sebastian faking it as a student complete with Red House’s uniform, to the team’s diarrhea horrors. Redmond stole the show again, as he was going to help Harcourt in the middle of the field, but tragedy struck which made him deadpan: “Oh. Someone get Harcourt.” Then immediately left the stage lol. The Blue House kids lifted Harcourt out.

The Green vs Purple house battle was the same as last time. I always felt bad to see Cheslock being the only Purple kid doing his best because without any support member cast while Violet was sitting in the grass. But this time, he gave Cheslock a tree sculpture of his bust as a good-job reward! Good for them.

Lastly Green vs Blue. They incorporated the rotating stage again in the last batting when Greenhill accidentally hit Ciel. The end of the match cut straight to the Thames Boat Ride, then they did the Blue House cheering scene after. Sebastian finally got to do his signature bridal carry, awww.

Midnight tea party: the setting was even more beautiful than last time. Undertaker letting his hair fall from his hat was iconic as usual. I was impressed with Master Agares’ fight scenes because his actor looked quite older than his 2021 predecessor. I always liked how they did Derrick Arden’s death in the musical, it felt more anguished from the P4 POV while in the anime, it just felt like a gruesome horror scene.

Final musical number was Ciel-Sebastian-Undertaker chorus during their fight in the garden. Music and choreography seemed to be similar, EXCEPT they somehow changed the iconic “Your life is my priority” scene!!! 2021’s version had me hold my breath as Sebastian had his arm possessively hooked around Ciel and took off his glove with his teeth (seriously, you have to see it yourself). This time they had Sebastian and Ciel reenact the scene on the highest stage instead of front and center, and I didn’t feel as much suspense nor was there any glove-removal from what I could see. It was also a weird placement because they were so far away, and Undertaker should’ve been the one on the top as he did his goodbye pose holding the moon.

We end the story with Sebastian recapping the aftermath with Weston’s students, and finally sebaciel’s conversation back at the manor. Again, Ciel reiterates that Sebastian is the only one who could never lie nor betray his trust. Perfect Black came on as an outro, and I got chills when Sebastian ended the last verse on a raised note!

The curtain call was the experience I’d waited for. Somehow I only realized just then that the actors would do the full call during their finale performance, which was what we got to see in the recordings! That day, after the cast bowed twice, the exit announcement immediately came on but guess what? The audience, including myself, kept clapping all the way through the announcement, it went for so long that the cast actually came out to take another bow! As they returned on stage, most of us also stood up for a standing ovation - according to twitter this doesn’t seem to be a regular occurrence outside of the finale. It felt like a truly wholesome “welcome back” for the troupe and for Kuromyu, especially after the rather harsh criticisms from the previous stage (due to major cast and style changes, even I took a while to bring myself to watch it) and the long break due to the COVID years.

Overall summary

Kuroshitsuji Musical 2024 was a faithful rerun of its predecessor. They succeeded with the musical numbers, new cast, overall adaptation of the story. The settings, props and special effects were wonderfully upgraded. The original cast carried the show: Eito Konishi’s singing felt greatly improved and I thought he carried himself as more mature than his last performance as Ciel. Sebastian’s Toshiki Tateishi had a mesmerizing voice the more I listened to him, he never went out of breath even while dancing or fighting - truly vocals fit for the troupe leader. Kandai Ueda did well as his own Undertaker too, even with Undertaker’s peculiar accent.

My few complaints: I felt like the P4 cast (bar Redmond) could do to have more distinction in their tones and movements. It felt hard to distinguish who was talking at times. The performance seemed to have a faster pacing this time around, and you get less absorbed in certain conversations between the characters, so I wished they’d added in slow scenes here and there. And of course I miss the signature sebaciel moments that I’ve mentioned - granted, this manga arc had always been my least favored because of the lack of sebaciel interactions anyway! So I’d say they did the best with the source material.

While I enjoyed seeing my favorite production performed live with the music blasting through my eardrums, it was the atmosphere that truly made the experience for me. Sitting in the 4-storeys grand hall full of some 2000 Kuroshitsuji fans really pulled me back in time, especially during the standing ovation. I’m so happy to see my favorite series so loved after all these years. I’m sure Yana-sensei could feel it too.

I wish a successful performance for the cast going forward to Tokyo, and hopeful for many more musicals to come!

[verosvault]

🚨SPOILERS FOR FANTASY HIGH JUNIOR YEAR EPISODE 7🚨

Dimension20 "Fantasy High Junior Year"

Episode 7 "Stress Tested"

Timestamp: 1:28:35

Video Length: 54sec.

Henry is so proud of Gorgug! 🥺👏❤️

Brennan: "Henry takes you aside and says,"

Henry: "I just wanna say, Gorgug, I am blown away by how much you are applying yourself and you should be so proud. You have not been set up for success, frankly, in the bureaucracy of this school. And it's really incredible. You have a gift for this. And I know that you're trying to figure out- There are parts of what you're pursuing that kind of don't click, but I just want you to know that I've never seen someone work as hard as you are working and NOT figure it out."

Gorgug: "Wow. Thank you. Yeah, I feel like, I don't know, I feel like I'm just learning a lot and you know, good class, right?"

Brennan: "You see that Unit, one of your classmates goes"

Unit: *beeping* *clapping*

Brennan: "And claps. Henry's like,"

Henry: "Right on, Unit! All right."

[nobodiesheartlessshitblog45]

Uzumaki Anime... What the hell?

As some of you all know I am big Junji Ito fan. Read some of most his manga, have his art book. And one of my favorite of manga all time is Uzuamki, and like a lot fans I was really happy the it was getting an anime, and I watched the very first episode and was blown away on beauitful anime.

It was perfect, it was like watching the manga come to life and I watched the epsiode 2 and...

And my god!

I have no idea what the hell happen but the animation looks... ... I don't want to a jerk. But it looks so bad.

Like compared too the very frist episode it was stunning and disturding it was so good, and I have no idea what or why or even how

But all I can say he part 2 looks so … lazily animated.

I am very disappointed. I am not trying to be dramatic or mean. But… I feel I was in for something really special after watching episode one, the Watch episode two and just noticed a drastic change in the animation.

I really blown away by part 1 and watched 2 and I am like...

Don’t understand what the hell happened.

Are you in something like this

Perfect animation 

And incredible artwork 

Like this…

I am…

How!?

I don’t understand.

Like if you watched the very first 2 episodes then you know exactly what I’m talking, there is A drastic difference between the two episodes, and it is just so disappointing

Not just animation, but art wise 

This is what episode one looks like 

And episode two.

See!?

I feel they just didn’t give a flying fuck about making this look good anymore and too me that is a huge disrespect to Ito-Sensei.

Like I feel like the people who worked in the very first episode absolutely respected the the manga and Ito’s work.

And I felt like episode two was like “Fuck it” and this is what they made.

I don’t know maybe I’m just thinking too much of a board. I just can’t help but feel rather  disheartening by the Second episode.

I haven’t really watched all of it, but from what I saw … it’s a looks a lot.

[this-blurry-photograph]

The Lost Tomb 2: Ep.7

Fatty: Xiao-ge's talking in full sentences. Shit's about to get real.

Does knee capping Wu Xie with a projectile flashlight to stop him from running down a dangerous corridor while under the influence of some tomb tomfoolery count as Xiao-ge saving him? Yes, in my books, yes it does.

Okay, it's not just me right? Everytime Wu Xie and Xiao-ge make eye contact it is the most intense gazing you've ever seen in your life. And it always lasts way longer than it has any need to.

Wu Xie stopping Fatty and being like, no it's my place to follow directly after Xiao-ge.

Man this episode is giving us so much good interaction between these three!

I love the tiny little nod and blink thing Xiao-ge does. Aaahhhh. I thought I was going to have a hard time with the change in actors, especially since this guy plays Xiao-ge quite differently from the season 1 actor, but I am having such a great time with him!

Do I count the flashback of Xiao-ge saving Wu Xie in the water while going to Lord Shang of Lu's tomb in the count even though it's definitely a remake of a scene that happened in season 1? I am going to say yes. Keeping track of these saves is turning into a much more serious endeavour than I originally predicted.

And here we have Fatty make jokes about Wu Xie and Xiao-ge's age difference. Man this episode has me smiling so much.

Oh no Wu Xie's struggling so much. I kind of really like the characterization we're getting with this climbing scene. Xiao-ge is of course just absurdly competent and parkours his way up. Fatty struggles but is able to use the rope to climb up the pillar. For all that he may struggle with the physical side of things he is an experienced tomb raider and that's evident here. And then you have Wu Xie who has no idea what he's doing and can't even get his feet off the ground. *sobbing*

I'm starting to question how much Wu Xie actually knows about all this and how much he's getting by on confidence, charm, and a ridiculous about of luck.

Aw, Wu Xie is so sweet. 'I'm sorry I got mad at you when you accused my uncle of being a murderer.'

I love the way this weird mummy thing runs.

Oh my goodness that shot where Xiao-ge goes flying away from the explosive. *crying*

I vote this trio should not be let into any more tombs. With the first one they burned it and an entire forest down, and now they've blown a hole in and flooded this one.

+1 to Xiao-ge saving Wu Xie for lassoing the mummy and blowing up the ceiling so they could escape.

It this gonna be the format? They go through the whole tomb together and then as they're escaping Xiao-ge disappears in a way that makes it unclear if he survived or not. Cause if it is he's gonna break my heart, and Wu Xie's too. Gosh I'm actually getting misty eyed. Watching Wu Xie desperately trying to go back for Xiao-ge was heart wrenching.

I started out this episode having just the best time, and now I'm so sad :(

Xiao-ge saving Wu Xie count: |||| |||| |||| |||| |

[harseer]

Curtains on Mayonaka Punch

Mayonaka Punch is over. I loved that show. The characters, the art, the music, the worldbuilding, all of it was lovely and lands it pretty solidly as my anime of the season. But also, as she says, To Love is to Hate, and so here i am with only bitching and moaning to do. (Spoilers for all of Mayonaka Punch)

I remember at the start of the season i wrote down somewhere "If the narrative turns out that Masaki was actually in the right in punching her co-host in the face, instead of having her confront her faults as a person, then this show will only be good as opposed to truly great". Was i right? I guess we'll never know because it ended up way worse than that. Masaki clearly has serious issues not just with violence, but also with being really mean and lowkey abusive at some points, but the show never tries to address it. She gets character development about dealing with online hate, about empathizing with others, about relying on her friends, etc, and these things are somewhat related, but the problematic aspects of her character never get examined and challenged. At the very end of the last episode she just punches Live in the face. On stream. I know it was meant as a joke, but that wasn't funny to me. That was super sad. It's the very thing that drove the people she loved away in episode 1, and now 12 episodes later she does it again and it's supposed to be okay??

The show never shows us what the disagreement that made Masaki punch Otomi even was. We see them make up in episode 10, then we see the making-up video in episode 11. That video shows Otomi giving a light slap at Masaki to get even and Masaki returning it with a full-blown punch, and Masaki gets re-cancelled for it. But that scene wasn't in episode 10. We only see the event through the edited video which is framed so that Masaki is out of frame the whole time. So, the implication here is that there's missing context that makes Masaki look worse than she really is, right? Because without some missing context, the newtube commenters going "Oh man, Masaki is a violent abusive bitch" are just straight up right, both in episode 11 and episode 1. Taken at face value, Masaki just threw 10 episodes of character development in the bin, did the exact same shit that got her cancelled at the start of the season, got cancelled again because of it in the exact same way, and rightfully so. Taken at face value Masaki is absolutely right to say "no one wants me on camera". And you have to take this at face value because this video is never brought up again, there is no extra context. Masaki just randomly physically assaults the people she loves at the slightest of disagreements, all her growth over the season was just about learning to cope with being a shitty person rather than improving as a person. This is pretty much the only logical way to read her as a character.

The disease to this symptom, I think, is that Mayonaka Punch has a structure problem. Let's review some episode synopsis. Episode 1: Masaki gets fired from Hype-sis and meets Live. Episode 2: The gang starts Chuchu Girls, Chuchu Girls gets shut down, They start again with Mayonaka Punch. This episode functions as a "This is why they can't use their powers for easy views" explanation. Episode 3: Tokage is introduced, they film a video cleaning up Tokage's crusty-ass room, but Yuki destroys the footage. Episode 4: Fu Episode (banger). These episodes are individually good, don't get me wrong, but 1/3rd of the season in and we're left still unsure what it is the show is actually about. All they've done is set things up and record food-eating videos and one (1) music cover. What kind of channel has only food-eating videos and one (1) music cover (not the point, Harseer). The show picks up steam from then on, raises its stakes and proves itself very deft in how it weaves its worldbuilding, character development and mystery together in each episode. It makes for a very good show that was entertaining to watch every week. But it can't wrap the whole thing together in the end. This isn't even a "the final episode was bad" situation, the final episode was very good (aside from the punch). It just, sorta... narratively leads nowhere.

I guess this is all my over-the-top snobish way of saying: i wanted more. Masaki was an interesting protagonist, the kind we don't see often in slice of life anime. There could have been something to make me say "It's interesting" when i look back on it in two years, but probably i'll just say "It's good".

B+. Good is still Good, i guess. Also this girl is cute as fuck:

[danpuff-ao3]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love 💙

Oooh, thanks for passing this to me, Lizzy! 😄 Let's see....100 fics, how to choose 5? 🤔 Well all know #1 already, don't we? 😂 So I'll take a leaf out of Lizzy's book and do a countdown to 1!

5.) A Matter of Time

Harry/Severus. Rated: E. Words: 3,686. Written for Snarry Adopt-a-Prompt 2022. Features reverse chronology and alternating POVs! Also: ambiguous/open ending (my love!) It feels like the Snarry of my youth, that angsty and spicy student/teacher, and some good old fashioned tragedy! I really feel like I pulled the thing off with this one! (What is said "thing"? Who knows.) Also, not to pat myself on the back but...that final line? Ouch.

4.) Cruel Summer

Harry/Sirius. Rated: E. Words: 5,445. Minor Harry/Severus. Written for HP Chan Fest 2022-2023. Features gorgeous art by @mrviran. It's a fic I've had floating around my noggin' for a few years but finally felt the call to write for Chan Fest! Our two beloved, troubled boys (Harry and Sirius) live together post PoA, and sees them through plenty of dysfunction, manipulation, and other problematic content 🤭 They have a very complicated (and angsty!) connection and I am so so pleased with how it came out! It's very bit as spicy, sad, and twisted as I'd hoped!

3.) The Curse of Anteros

Harry/Severus. Rated: E. Words: 52,566. Written for Snarry Bang 2023. Inspired by an episode of Charmed called "Magic Hour" (which itself was inspired by a movie called Ladyhawke). This is another idea I've long wanted to write, but never knew how to write it until now. Curses, fairytales, magical animals, true love!! Begins with student/teacher and carries on through time to old men Snarry!!!! This fic really grew way out of control and I'm so glad it did. It feels like...a "proper" story, if that makes sense? Actual plot! Novel length! Who am I even???? Anyway I'm stupidly proud of this one. Also: ART BY MRVILLAIN AGAIN, MY BELOVED TEAMMATE, I'M OBSESSED. Like...idk I'm blown away. Which sounds bad cuz this is my story, but I don't care. This is genuinely a story that not only was I so pumped to create, but one that I'd have LOVED to read as a reader! Had someone else written this I'd have lost my mind reading it. I hate saying that, it sounds so arrogant, but I don't care, I'm losing my mind over this one. I wrote it in like 2 weeks!!!! This fic POURED out of me! And I love it!

2.) Collateral Damage

Draco/Ron. Rated: E. Words: 16,071. Written for Ron-Draco Fest 2021. The first draft of this got to like 10k before I had to scrap it and start totally over. Somehow the original opening kept winding down the wrong path. So finally after fighting with it for way too long (and only 2 weeks to go until it was due), I gave it up and tried again. Decided: "hey, let's open with porn and see what happens." Well...That worked. That did it. All I needed was to open with a BJ for magic to happen, who knew? I ended up with a story I was super jazzed about, and to my great surprise (and pleasure!) others loved it, too!!

1.) Contempt | Devotion

Harry/Severus. Rated: E. Words: 20,400 | 25,843. Written for Snarry-a-Thon 2022 and 2023. This one's cheating a bit since it's technically 2 fics, but it's also the same story in different POVs so...it kinda counts, right? Also I know people have told me they liked Devotion more but I can't help but admit that Contempt itself still holds the top spot in my heart! And while I think say The Curse of Anteros is a better overall story, I don't think any fic ever will top Contempt. I mean, never say never, but Contempt is the story of dreams. It's my heart and soul. It's the Snarry I've always wanted to write. The story, the dynamic, the characterizations, everything. It's everything I've wanted in a Snarry since I first began reading Snarry 20 years ago. Like...I have no words to express just how meaningful this work is to me. This is literally the culmination of all of my Snarry feels. I dragged this story out of my gut. I pulled it out of my skin and wrote it in my blood. That's how connected I am to this work. (Wow that sounds really dramatic but also...true.)

Genuinely I was so cared people would hate it, but I wrote it anyway because I needed it and I loved it. I'm very glad to say that plenty of others love it with me! And this is another one @mrviran offered love to in the form of a podfic! (Plus cover art!) I'm fully obsessed with the podfic (AND ART!) and I get all teary eyed when I think about it, that my dear friend worked so hard to bring more life to my baby. 🥹

Kinda funny how my favorite works (and what i consider some of my best works) were all for fests. Fests really do inspire me, even if they make me want to pull my hair out. 😂

Also is it cheating to give honorary mentions to Lover Boy at Play, In My Veins (In My Blood), Orange Blossoms, Teardrop in Your Palm, and Black Skies? 👀

[darasideblog]

Offloading thoughts on the whole Goshawk season of the White Vault because I need to put to word what didn't land for me with this season and I don't want to annoy my friends babbling about shit

It. Is. So. Slow.

And yet there's no tension whatsoever. Despite that the production value and voice actors are absolutely top notch as always. I have zero critique on that front, everyone's great.

I don't have any reason to root for these characters. At the start of the season I knew one thing about Iffy.

She's a nature photographer.

At the end of the season I know a whole two things about Iffy.

She's a nature photographer. And probably Casner's daughter.

Which is just dropped right at the end in such a abrupt way that I half expected to hear the 'dun dun' music that the Black Tapes used whenever they'd drop a revelation without really setting it up.

I don't mind the change of format, the found footage format worked great for season 1-3, but pretty obviously had gotten forced by season 5.

But if I the listener am no longer privy to the characters' inner thoughts, they need to externalize those thoughts. Within half of the first season you have a good grip on who the Svalbard team is, what they have left behind and want to get back to, which just makes it all the more heartbreaking when they get killed (or transformed). The season 3 expedition is a odd half and half in that the academics are pretty much just there, but Simon, Dragana, Maheer and Raimy get enough presence and dialogue between them for me to care about them.

There's none of that in Goshawk. I can honestly barely keep the sisters apart in my head because there's nothing beyond 'one has a injured leg' to really keep them separate. They don't talk about themselves, and neither do Iffy. Which makes sense for the first half, running from kidnappers in a blizzard doesn't leave room for much chit chat. But once they find shelter there should have been some room to get to know them. Even your shittiest action movie will let one soldier have a line about how much he misses his wife and baby at home, so you'll at least feel a little bit sorry for him when he inevitably gets shot or blown up.

Which really is the second major issue I think there is with this season: the narrative is split between two stories, in every episode.

The whole family stuff is... interesting, in that world building kind of way, but it adds absolutely nothing to the overall horror and survival story. It isn't really helped either that the stakes feels so hilariously low. Dís and her entire family is all acting like the sky is falling, and they're all about to die to various accidents because their protection is disappearing, when Ardna throws herself in front of a car to save a friend, and... walks away with what amounts to a bump on her head that just requires a couple of days in the hospital and off home she goes.

You could pretty much cut out half if not two thirds of the family side of the story, put it in the latter half of the season as a cut away, and ramp up the stakes to build some proper "Oh shit, something is up with this system that's been in place for centuries" feeling. Artifact showed there's plenty of creepy feelings to get when the guardians starts to mess with things, even while you're in the safety of civilization. But aside from the very last bits with one randomly showing up at Dís place and whispering to her, there's nothing really supernatural going on here either. Just a mother concerned for her daughter, which is all well and good but it's not a supernatural horror story.

So one story line feels like it's not really getting any room to establish its cast and do the whole supernatural horror thing, nor actually drop any 'oh, something is suspicious about our saviour' hints in regards to Jason, and the other is honestly taking up too much space with too little substance to it.

Honestly, I was hesitant about this season anyway, since I left season 5 feeling a little sour at how it felt like it just wanted to get rid of this particular story beat and start over, without really giving much payoff to the whole five season story line (and the miniseries' events), but I wanted to give Goshawk a fair shot.

And now I'm not sure if I'll even bother with the next season. Which sucks, I started listening to it shortly before season 2 dropped, and have eagerly awaited each season since then.

[vannahfanfics]

One Piece Live Action: Review

Well, I came home after work yesterday and immediately binged the entirety of the live-action One Piece adaptation. Now that it's morning, I thought I would collect my thoughts (which I rambled to several friends and also into my handy-dandy phone notepad app) and write a review, for anyone who's interested. I'll be honest, it's mostly for me; I have so many feelings as someone who actually loves cinematography and the artistic analysis of film with regard to storytelling—because we all know how much I love my stories—that I just have to rave about this honest-to-goodness masterpiece of a show. Obviously, it will be very spoiler-heavy, so read at your own discretion!

So, I'll start with a blanket statement and reiterate that, again, I thought this show was a masterpiece. Given the history of live-action anime adaptations, I was cautious in not having terribly high expectations, even after learning that Oda was intimately involved in the production; I also went in looking to respect it as its own entity, though, and willing to look past certain things provided there were no egregious insults to the source material. And y'all, when I say I was blown away—I damn near had a smile on my face the whole night watching it. It wasn't just the nostalgia; it was the overbearing feeling that so much love was poured into this show, which I find to be unfortunately lacking in a lot of Hollywood films these days. I found myself thinking of the Peter Jackson adaptations of the Lord of the Rings and The Hobbit. Though there were changes, some of them large, none of them felt averse to the source material; in fact, the changes felt like they came from an admiration of the source material and a strong desire to bring them justice. I dunno, I was just amazed by the pervading feeling that each and every person involved in making this show had a dream to bring One Piece to life, and they poured every ounce of effort into bringing that dream to fruition—which is what One Piece is all about. This has set the standard for live-action anime adaptations, and I finished this show so desperately hungry for more, to see how they could go bigger and better when bringing the subsequent arcs to life in a nostalgic but refreshingly new way. Goda has delivered yet again, and honestly, I will never be the same. Words aren't going to be able to capture the depth of my feelings about this show, but I must ramble on nonetheless because I am just so awed and inspired and emotional about it.

Episode 1: Romance Dawn

First of all, it's a no-brainer to have the first episode of the series titled "Romance Dawn," but it still made me giddy. The opening sequence was sick. Michael Dorman absolutely sells it as Gol D. Roger; his absolute blitheness in the face of his impending death is so spot-on, and his rendition of the "Wealth, Fame, Power" speech was so rousing. I loved that they kept the fact that Dracule, Shanks, Smoker, and Dragon were in attendance, too, and though they were the briefest of blips, their appearances hinted at the personalities and relationships with Roger that manga/anime followers already know well: Dracule, simply intrigued and stoic; little Shanks, distraught at the looming death of his captain; young Smoker, mystified at the downfall of such a legend but not necessarily sad; and Dragon, who is shown only in his green cloak, shrouded in mystery as he is. I liked the inclusion of Garp at the execution, especially given his expanded role in this adaptation of the series, but also because of his close relationship with Roger in canon; it only makes sense that he would be there at the end. I was also pleasantly surprised that they showed Roger's death on-screen. It immediately established that the tone of this version of One Piece would be darker, with the stakes higher, and I honestly love that. Finally, the overhead scene of all the people rushing out of the square to take to the seas was so breathtaking; it really drove home the impact that this one man and his words had on the world, to the point that his legacy is still going strong twenty years later.

I loved the way we are introduced to Luffy, with this new scene of him rambling to the mail pelican while shoveling water out of his sinking dinghy. It was very Jack Sparrow-esque, which was a nice nod to another defining powerhouse of the pirate adventure genre, but also so Luffy. And I maintained that feeling throughout the show. I mean, even down to the little things, like Luffy smiling every time he was in a fight, him holding onto his hat while fighting to keep it from falling off, him cheering and screaming and crowing with glee—all the little nuances were just so Luffy! I'll probably say it a thousand times throughout this, but every single member of the cast is astounding in their roles and how they embody the characters. Iñaki is no exception; he is Luffy, through and through, even if not exactly the same as the anime/manga Luffy that we all know and love. Also, the CGI effects of his rubber abilities are really cool! I imagine that was so hard to pull off, but they really do a good job of trying to make it as believable as possible.

I will scream from the rooftops about how much I love the treatment of Alvida's character. There was not even one single quip of her being "fat" or "ugly"; everything pertaining to how she is "bad" was geared to her cruelty, and I love that we've broken away from that stereotype in this show. Also, Ilia Isorelýs Paulino slayed as Alvida. She was every ounce of strong, brutal, and callous as canon Alvida, and honestly, she looks gorgeous doing it.

Also, I lived for Koby and Luffy's friendship in this series. Morgan Davies did such a fantastic job portraying Koby and his growth, and his chemistry with Iñaki was just so... yes. Every time they are on screen together, I have the biggest, stupidest smile on my face because you can just see how deep their friendship is despite not knowing each other for very long. Their goodbye scene was so, so, so touching; with the lighting, and the music, and the expression on Koby and Luffy's faces... I got misty-eyed in a way I didn't reading the manga. Given how Koby's friendship with Luffy is such a defining part of his character in the manga, the fact that they evolved it after this initial arc made me incredibly happy. If this show goes on, I'd love to see how they continue to show Koby's growth alongside the Straw Hat's adventures, given the pivotal roles he goes on to play in the narrative.

Another thing I love is the fact that the Straw Hat's backgrounds are shown in pieces throughout the narrative at key moments in the present, such that past and present parallel. It's so good and so much more impactful than just having it shown as one big chunk. Since this is largely Luffy and Shanks' background, I'll focus on it. Peter Gadiot did such a compelling job as Shanks. His portrayal of Shanks carried a tenderness and care for Luffy that just tugged at all my heartstrings. Like, his expression when he realized that Luffy ate the Devil Fruit was just so amazingly haunting... The guilt, the horror, the realization that Luffy's life will never be the same, and there's nothing he can do... Simply spectacular. Also, I will comment again on just how amazing the casting was. Even the background characters, such as Shanks' crew, just shined in their brief moments. Like, even Makino—her minimal reactions with Luffy and Shanks were just so her! She and Shanks really had that "husband and wife" energy, and I lived for it. I also have to give a round of applause to the dialogue in the series. The small changes from the manga/anime defined these portrayals of the characters as distinct from those we've come to love, but in the best way. I was on the FLOOR when little Luffy yelled "Why didn't you get his ass?!" at Shanks because it came out of left field yet was so believable and so Luffy with what we'd been shown so far. Iconic.

I loved the introduction to Zoro's character! It was so him, but also, I was amazed by the inclusion of Baroque Works so early on! His fight with the previous Number 7 was badass, and the fact that, again, the show didn't shy away from on-screen death really highlighted how dangerous this world really is. And it contradicts so well with Nami's introduction, which is so playful, with her jaunty little theme in the background. It's just so One Piece, adrenaline-pumping action and high stakes balanced with lighthearted energy and fun. Then, the bar sequence was just... chef's kiss. I love that the original three came together in the first episode; I was so excited to see what it meant as far as changes to the story and how their dynamic develops. The way they wove in scenes from the manga/anime into this new narrative was so clever; we still got Zoro eating the little girl's rice ball off the ground, establishing how good of a character he is despite seeming so ruthless. But also, can we talk about the choreography of Zoro's fight scene against all those Marines? Just... The fact that he didn't even draw his sword once because he didn't even feel them worthy opponents, the languid nonchalance of his movements when he stepped away from the bar interspersed with his crisp agility in cutting them down, the guy he took out with the cup?! Amazing. Mackenyu read the goddamn assignment. Also, Nami using her wiles to flirt with a Marine, then knocking him out to steal his uniform as soon as he's distracted... Classic Nami. And then Luffy, getting super excited at seeing Zoro fight... while Koby immediately crawls under the table to hide, LOL.

Also, props to Aidan Scott for his portrayal of Helmeppo, like, he perfectly captured the whiny bitch energy. Crawling on his hands and knees away as soon as Zoro gets one hit in on him is classic Helmeppo lmao. I also liked that they didn't shy away from hinting at how terribly Morgan treats him, though I do wish we could have seen a little more of it, if only for the sake of rounding out Helmeppo's character to make his growth throughout the show more impactful (and I will rant and rave about his growth because, my gosh, I love what they did with his character!). I died at the infamous naked sword-practicing scene, but like, it was also so perfect? Like, it just gave even more depth to his character, showing that he does desire to be strong and taken seriously, and how much his mistreatment by his father affects him. The fact that Zoro is the one who gave him his curly-bob haircut sends me, though, just... so hysterical. I screamed.

Langley Kirkwood did a great job at playing Axe-Hand Morgan, too; he totally captured his swagger, self-confidence, and tendency to exaggerate his own accomplishments. I liked that they changed the narrative a bit to where Zoro ended up in the yard because he refused to join Morgan rather than just him beating up Helmeppo; like, it just added such a neat spin to his character, showing that he is devoted to being a bounty hunter simply because he is searching for strong opponents for the pursuit of his dream and nothing else.

I also loved the changes to how Zoro, and Nami, end up joining up with Luffy. My heart swelled when Luffy untied Zoro simply because he wanted him to be able to follow his dream, and that's all, not as a means of pressuring Zoro to join him. Then Nami, sneaking around the Marine Base and stumbling upon Luffy, who almost gets them caught time and time again. It's just so them. I was so overjoyed to see Nami get some action with her Climatact, too! It was so nice to not see her overshadowed by the guys, but right there in the thick of it with them. And, speaking of in the thick of it, the fight with Axe-Hand Morgan was so good! The choreography was amazing, and the music accompanying it just made it that much more heart-pumping. I literally starting pumping my fist and whooping when the bandana and third sword came out, like, iconic Zoro moment brought to life.

Finally, Buggy's introduction at the end was so spot-on. The drama. The excessiveness. The madness. It made me so pumped, alongside seeing that Garp going after Luffy was going to be put at the beginning of the series. Some people didn't like the change, but honestly, it made more sense to me that he would go after Luffy immediately, seeing as he was intent on testing Luffy to see if he was ready to take on the world. It's evident that Garp deeply cares for Luffy, and it just makes sense to me that he wouldn't wait.

Episode 2: The Man in the Straw Hat

Honestly, this is one of my favorite episodes, and all because of Jeff Ward's portrayal of Buggy. It was so amazing. But, I also like the beginning segment showing Zoro, Nami, and Luffy's dynamic. There really is tension among them; they are not a crew yet, and seeing them come together over adversities and genuinely beginning to see each other as a crew and a family just gives me the warm and fuzzies. Because trust isn't just immediately given; it's earned, and it takes time, and seeing them slowly realize how special Luffy is and become compelled and inspired to follow him is so special.

Okay, but onto the main act: Buggy. Buggy. BUGGY! I loved the changes they made to this whole thing, honestly. Setting it in a whole circus tent where the audience is kidnapped town members rather than just... a concrete slab in a ruined town, was so smart. Like, as silly as Buggy is, he is still a menacing pirate, and the way they set up this encounter really reminded us of that. And y'all, I cannot praise enough Jeff Ward's Buggy. So amazing. Like, he's so demented yet pathetic in that Buggy way that it blows my mind, and yet, he still brought his own spin to it by really leaning into the fact that Buggy is the way he is because of his insecurities, to the point that he is totally delusional about what really happened between him and Shanks. Like, the personality switch when he realizes that Luffy knows Shanks, and he full-heartedly believes that Luffy was abandoned by Shanks, too, and is an outcast like him, and offers to have him join his crew, but being so spine-chillingly twisted the whole time is just so, so, so good. Also, again, the CGI for his Devil Fruit abilities was so cool and slick. It captured that perfect balance between horrifying and comical that's so Buggy. Finally, again, I love the changes to the dialogue that came with the show. Buggy's "Surprise, shitheads!" is just so him but still had me rolling because I didn't expect it.

And, in true One Piece fashion, Luffy's perilous plight is countered with the relative light-heartedness of Nami and Zoro escaping to rescue him. Seriously, I love the sass that Mackenyu brings to Zoro. The "Yeah, that does sound like me" was just so perfect.

The water tank scene was... oh my gosh. I will say it again and again throughout my review, but it was so clever and symbolic of them to put the flashbacks in places in the present that parallel each other. I knew it was coming, but the scene where Shanks saves Luffy was just so emotional and raw. Again, Peter Gadiot brings such a softness to Shanks that I love; the tenderness when he hugs Luffy and tells him that he doesn't care about his arm, that he's just glad he's okay, looks like it really comes from the heart. I was in tears at the end of the flashback when Shanks bequeathed his hat to Luffy; it was so emotional, and the choice to have Shanks tell Luffy to "Be good" almost killed me. Because it isn't just him telling him to behave... It's telling him to be a good person, and that's the core of Luffy's character: he's just, he's compassionate, he's truly good in a world so corrupt. Literally, that one small moment took my breath away. Finally, just a small note, but God, did I love the way that they showed Conqueror's Haki! I was interested as to how they were going to do it, and it delivered.

Finally, Iñaki has Luffy's "Don't mess with my friend or I'll kick your ass" glare down pat. When he looked at Buggy, I lost my mind with excitement because I knew shit was about to get real!

Episode 3: Tell No Tales

I really like the title of this episode, too. Not only is it clever because it's Usopp's episode, but it foreshadows the horror movie-esque vibe that Kuro's personage brings to the show by bringing to mind the saying "dead men tell no tales."

I love that the episode starts off with another scene of Luffy, Zoro, and Nami on the boat to show how they are coming together. The banter is different, somehow, with an undercurrent of growing care and trust. Also, of course, I love that they kept the janky Jolly Roger and the details of paint splatter on Luffy's face. It was just a classic cute, funny Straw Hats moment. I also loved all their interactions in the mansion, especially the changing room scene. Like, I love that they kept Luffy's acespec overtones by having him totally not react to Nami asking for opinions on how she looks at all.

I love the changes they brought to Syrup Village! Like, it was so clever to make it a shipwright's town with Usopp having a job in the shipyard, which gives more weight to his abilities as a shipwright and inventor plus the deep bond he develops with the Going Merry. Also, I adore Jacob Romero Gibson's rendition of Usopp! He makes his character so funny, so charming, so lighthearted like the comic-relief Usopp we know, but with some slight changes that really define him as a distinct Usopp. His chemistry with Kaya is so good; I loved the treatment they got in this adaptation. You could truly feel the love and deep bond between them.

Again, the side character casting is amazing. Celeste Loots makes the sweetest, most adorable Kaya. Her look of inspired wonder when Luffy was talking about a pirate's love for their ship and how it's a home was so simple, yet so defining for both her and Luffy's characters. I also loved that she and Nami bonded! It was a clever way to give insight into both of their characters. Alexander Maniatis played such a great Kuro; like, the instant I saw him, I got chills down my spine because he seemed such a prim and proper butler yet had such an edge of malice about him. Also, he nailed the Kuro glasses gesture. Also, Sham and Rika were so well done; they really nailed that whimsical horror vibe going on. Finally, Merry was done well, too! Though I adore him, I was glad that they chose to actually kill him this go-around. First of all, from a medical perspective, it's hard to survive that kind of wound LOL; but also, it again showed just how high the stakes are and how frighteningly ruthless and cold Kuro is.

I was fascinated to see the addition of the Marines to this arc, but honestly, I loved it. The scene of Usopp running through the streets screaming for help was so heartbreaking; Jacob killed it, especially with the expression of disbelief, terror, and desperation on his face as he slowly sat down whispering "Why won't anyone believe me?" Again, so clever to superimpose this with the crux of his backstory, with the reveal that his chronic lying stems from the trauma of his mother's illness and believing that if he just kept up this ritual every day, his father would come home and everything would be right again in the world; sympathy for Usopp hit me more than it ever had. Then, for it to pan to Koby leaning over him earnestly saying, "I believe you," I got chills. Absolutely stupendous way to end the episode.

Episode 4: The Pirates Are Coming

This one is also one of my favorite episodes, for multiple reasons, all pertaining to character development.

The scenes of Zoro in the well will haunt me forever in the best way. It was just such an amazing choice, symbolically, to parallel his scenes of backstory with Kuina with him struggling to get out of this well, a deep, dark hole from which he seemingly cannot escape, just like the deep, dark hole of insecurity he struggled to climb out of with Kuina, and the deep, dark hole of trying to honor Kuina's memory that he struggles with early on. Him slipping each time he is defeated by Kuina or something happens to knock him down... Him climbing higher as his childhood self grows and bonds with Kuina... It was just so artistic, so beautiful, that I still get chills thinking about it. The amazing score that accompanies the scenes also has a lot to do with it. I haven't touched on the score much, but honestly, it's so amazing too. Also, shoutout to the actor who played Kuina's dad. Like, the way he delivered the news of Kuina's death to Zoro was so powerful; him trying to be the stoic sensei, but still crying a tear, and them embracing at the end... My heart hurted.

There is a lot of good Koby growth in this episode as well! This is where we really see him struggle with his sense of "justice" that he gains and grows throughout the anime/manga... Wanting to follow orders, but wanting to follow his heart, but not yet having the courage to stand up to authority, all foiled by Helmeppo, who is jaded by the reality of the Marines and lacks empathy for others secondary to his own self-hatred... It's so good, and a wonderful addition, in my opinion, because I hate that a lot of the growth of the other characters in One Piece happens behind the scenes sometimes.

Again, I love the changes to Usopp in this adaptation, and it peaks with him choosing to stay with Kaya in the mansion. It just gives a glimmer of the Usopp we come to see, the one who refuses to run away when the things he cares about are truly threatened, and drives home the fact that Usopp loves Kaya enough to face certain death for her, despite his cowardly tendencies. Just amazing.

But again, I have to give props to the actors of the Kuro crew, and the whole team behind this sequence. It was so creepy! Like, it had such a maliciousness and element of horror that the anime/manga just couldn't capture. I knew what happened in the end, but I was still on pins and needles the whole time because there was just so much tension! I did laugh at the Zoro and Luffy moment out in the woods, though, referencing Zoro's nonexistent sense of direction. And Zoro's fight with the lackeys was amazingly choreographed, as always, with Mackenyu really nailing Zoro getting enraged when Kuina's sword was stolen.

The ending scenes! What a way to end such a tense episode! I screamed at the UsoKaya kiss; it was so unexpected yet delightful! But also, the Straw Hats' reactions were so them. And then, the bliss and exhilaration as they sailed away on the Going Merry, while notes of "We Are" played in the background. Even the small details hit me, like Zoro finding a place to sleep and sleeping with Kuina's sword, and Luffy and Usopp arguing over who's captain, and all of them laughing together... just really captured the world I love. Then, an amazing cliffhanger with them being attacked by Garp and Luffy dropping the "Grandpa?" bomb. Perfect.

Episode 5: Eat At Baratie!

I was so hype for this episode because Sanji was my first One Piece love, and I was so excited to see the takes on his character and arc. I was not disappointed.

I liked howGarp's relationship with Luffy was given slowly over the course of the series. The flashback of him destroying Luffy's boat and hauling him off, with no regard to his dreams, really hit home because of how much value had been placed on dreams up until then. Garp as a character really started to shine here, with him hurling a cannonball with his bare hand, then laughing when Luffy bested him (because we all know how intertwined laughter is to the One Piece narrative, especially with regards to Luffy). The simple bit of Koby saving Helmeppo's life, too, and the look of bewilderment he gives him that heralds the change in his character and impending growth, was just so good, too! And of course, the interactions of the Straw Hats were great; they are coming together, but they still have a long way to go, and that just makes what follows in the Baratie arc that much more meaningful. They aren't a crew yet, but they will be.

So appropriate that Luffy's nose and gullet leads him to the Baratie. And, oh, I love what they did with this set! It's the most magnificent, in my opinion. I love the addition of a lighthouse, since the Baratie is supposed to be a refuge for hungry sailors of all kinds. I thoroughly enjoyed everything about the crew and how they interacted in the restaurant, too; it had so many good moments of them bonding. However, I have to take a moment to acknowledge Usopp, who just killed it throughout this episode; like, strutting into the restaurant tits-out? "I can't eat anymore, but it's so good?" The fishbowl? The dancing? The blabbing to a complete stranger only for it to turn out to be a legendary badass here for his captain? Iconic behavior. But, seriously, so many good character moments here. Luffy ordering milk like the innocent cutie he is. Zoro struggling to sit in the booth with his swords but refusing to check them. Nami being totally unimpressed with Sanji's flirting. The boys teasing Nami for Sanji's flirting. 10/10. And Zoro and Nami bonding by trying to learn more about one another! The shift in her character really is fantastic; Emily Rudd did a bang-up job of showing that Nami truly is a good person, but is so damaged by her childhood and is scared to get close to anyone because she inevitably hurts them. I loved that she called Zoro her friend while trying to dissuade him from fighting Mihawk, and the switch that happens in her debating on betraying them in secret comes from him rebuking her by throwing her own words back in her face.

Also, speaking of Sanji, I adore Taz Skylar's Sanji with all my heart. Like, first of all, I love that they toned down his flirtatiousness. It's still there, but it is at such a more tolerable level because it isn't overbearing or uncomfortable. Then there is his smile. My God, every time he smiles, my heart sings. Like, he just captured the essence of Sanji that is part dapper gentleman badass, part snarky, foul-mouthed asshole, and part pathetic wet beast of a man. I have fallen in love with Sanji all over again. I also loved his relationship with Zeff. It was so them; bickering incessantly, antagonism belying the genuine love they have for each other. Finally, I adore the relationship he gains with the crew. Like, it is so obvious how much he comes to care about Luffy after them talking about dreams and later while helping Luffy process what it really means to be a captain. Also, it's so badass that he did all his own stunts. Him fighting so screams Sanji! I just cherish this Sanji, I really do.

I knew going in that they condensed this arc, and honestly, I'm pleased with how they did it. I thought it was so clever to introduce Mihawk differently, with him absolutely decimating Don Krieg's crew single-handedly and calling it "Killing time." Also, he's so hot, it's honestly unfair. Again, the amazing casting shines through, because Steven Ward made such a spectacular Mihawk, totally encapsulating that devil-may-care attitude of his and his interest in powerful people. Phenomenal. And to pair this with more Koby growth, with him being appalled by Garp using pirates to do his business and that the World Government has the Warlord system. I had to laugh at Helmeppo's "You don't know shit about how the world works" because it was just a funny line in general, but funnier coming from him, who also doesn't know shit about how the world works in a different way. It was sad not to see Sanji shine in combat against the Don Krieg crew (though I loved the Gin appearance and that he lives this time!), I think it was a smart narrative choice to have this episode center around Mihawk vs. Zoro, given what follows. Speaking of, that fight was amazing. It was a dead ringer to how it goes down into the manga, down to the pose at the end when Zoro points his sword at the sky and vows never to lose again. I also love that Nami didn't flee in secret like she did in the manga; she stayed, and there was that tender moment of her holding Usopp's hand for comfort. I just think it does so well to illustrate how Nami is changing, but also, the sheer power that Luffy holds in making people who have given up all hope believe again. Nami stays because, deep down, she has hope that she can be a part of this crew, that she can have the courage to tell Luffy the truth and have him help her save her home, that she can be free of Arlong, and that is so powerful in a way that is different and new than the way things originally go.

Episode 6: The Chef and The Chore Boy

I love that there is so much weight in this episode on Zoro's injury. It was glossed over in the manga, honestly, but this adaptation goes into how grievous it is and uses that as the crux of Luffy's growth as a captain and how they come together. It's amazing, narrative-wise, enough for me to be content with the large plot changes they made to the Baratie arc.

The Mihawk and Garp interaction is so gold, honestly. It really captures Mihawk's thing about doing whatever he wants despite being a dog of the World Government, and the keen interest he takes in Luffy. Also, again, Garp laughing while losing his shit at the fact that his grandson is out there tearing up the East Blue as a pirate is so awesome.

Sanji's backstory is the only one told as a full, uninterrupted narrative, and the fact that it's different because of the circumstances and the fact that Sanji is telling it to show Luffy, who is obviously doubting himself, what it means to be a captain is again so clever. Again, Sanji is one of my all-time favorite characters, and his backstory was always the most gut-wrenching to me; seeing it come to life was so heartbreakingly beautiful and sad and inspiring. Props to the kid that played him, like, he did a stellar job. The way he attacked Zeff with unhinged rage over his food; the way he slowly unraveled throughout the time on the rock, starting out as determined to survive and having the optimism that only a child can have and slowly transitioning into the terrified little boy he is, curled up and sniffling as the days drag on; the look of shock, guilt, and disbelief when he realizes that Zeff gave him all the food and ate his own leg (especially with knowledge from the manga, knowing the way Sanji grew up and how he has never known any sort of love, so the idea that someone would sacrifice for him, especially as a stranger, just shatters his entire world view)... It's simply spectacular. And comparing that to the present Sanji, who is so full of energy and life and hope for finding the All Blue, is just so impactful.

But, seriously, I love the whole thing of the characters' growth revolving around Zoro and his recovery. I was touched by Nami reading the story of Noland to him (and also excited by another crumb for potential sequel seasons), and Luffy struggling with what to say because he is struggling with himself and his ability to captain.

Again, I really enjoyed how they handled the transition from Baratie to Arlong Park. First of all, I loved that they kept Buggy a part of the narrative. It encapsulates that spirit of One Piece in which events and characters hundreds of chapters back can still return to have profound effects on the narrative. Also, Buggy is just downright hysterical in this show, and I enjoy his presence. The fishmen are so intimidating, and I like how they used the Baratie to set that and Arlong's motivations up. Getting to see Sanji really fight was great, and when he lost his shit because Zeff got hurt... Yes, just yes. Finally, I love that Nami just "betrayed" them in person. The fact that it went down like it did made Luffy emotional intelligence and his belief that Nami isn't just a traitor that much more impactful to me. Emily Rudd did such a good job of showing Nami as someone who is callous on the surface but clearly has that undertone of hesitation and guilt about what she is doing, though she knows she is doing it to save their lives. Also, Sanji being shirtless while saving Luffy? Like, I will take the fanservice, but it was just so funny to me LOL

But the end of the episode was so hopeful! After everything going wrong, Luffy finally finds the words he needs to say because he knows now what it means to be a captain; he needs his crew as much as they need him. And Zoro waking up at that moment, and Luffy being so excited to see him that he crawls all over him and flings his arm around LOL, it's so Luffy. And I loved that we got official acknowledgement of Zoro as his first mate! It was so good! And finally, Sanji and Zeff's goodbye. It was so emotional, Taz's voice breaking as he thanked Zeff for everything and putting up with all his shit over the years... I cried. TT.TT And of course, ending it with the twist that Buggy will lead them to Arlong is just so exciting LOL

Chapter 7: The Girl With The Sawfish Tattoo

I was so ready for this episode because some of the scenes in the Arlong Park arc are still some of my favorites. I'll admit that this is the arc that had a few changes that I wish weren't there, but overall, I still like how it was handled, and it kept the spirit of the manga.

Again, I like how Nami's backstory is interspersed with key moments of the present narrative. The initial scene of childhood innocence with her and Nojiko and Belle-mere, so light and happy, and coming to a jarring end as she snaps to reality in Arlong Park... Perfect. Also, I thought it was cool that they turned Arlong Park into an amusement park; it's a clever nod to Arlong's twisted notion of making the world a "paradise" for fishmen. Again, I have to commend the casting. Arlong is so savage in this. He practically radiates bloodlust, and it's so good, even though I know what happens, I was worrying for Nami the whole time because he could so easily turn on her on a whim. Then, pairing the conflict of Nami having to go collect money from her village with the conflict with Belle-mere, her hating that she's poor and weaponizing the fact that they aren't a "real" family, as a frustrated child would... So clever. I will admit that this is where the changes that I don't like come in. I really don't like that they made it to where the town had no clue about the fact that she was trying to buy back the village the whole time, and they pretended not to know to try and keep Nami safe. Like, they kept the idea that Nami felt sh deserved to be hated because she felt guilty for not cherishing Belle-mere as she should have and somehow responsible for what happened to the town, but still, what was special about Nami's arc is that she believed that she hurt everyone around her and that she didn't deserve to be loved, but she had been loved the whole time, and this show completely abolished that. In the same vein, I hated the cuts they made to Genzo's character. Belle-mere was her mother figure, and Genzo was her father figure, and that was largely unseen here. They had the nods to the pinwheels (it was cute that they used the tangerine skills), but, again, I felt it was a disservice to Nami's story and character to make changes like this, and I honestly don't know why they felt the need to do it at all, aside from maybe driving home the fact that Nami felt she deserved to be hated and so let the village hate her.

Again, very interesting how they wove in the Marines here. I honestly loved the dinner with Garp and Zeff; them talking about the old days, and Zeff hinting at the times changing and the upcoming generation that becomes a crux to the overall One Piece narrative, is so good. Also, love the Helmeppo and Koby bonding. Their friendship has become so important to me.

But, seriously, props to Iñaki, and the scriptwriters, for just perfectly capturing Luffy's emotional intelligence. Because Nojiko has no idea that Nami is trying to buy back the town, the cast is left believing that Nami genuinely betrayed them, but Luffy just refuses to abandon his gut feeling that there is something more, and he won't stop until he hears it directly from Nami, whom he knows is not being honest with him. Though I don't like the changes to the story, I do like the scene of Nami and Nojiko's reconciliation. It's very heartfelt and heartbreaking, especially when followed by Nezumi arriving to take Nami's money away; everything finally seems to be going right for Nami, and then it all falls apart. I loved the cinematography of her running through the tangerine fields; it truly captured the desperation, all the way up until her falling to her knees at the sight of her village being razed to the ground. Emily Rudd and Iñaki truly nailed the next sequence, which is my favorite in all the manga; Nami's screaming with rage as she stabs her tattoo, Luffy standing there, waiting for the ask for help that he instinctively knows will come, Nami turning around and whispering a broken "Help me," and then, in a perfect parallel to the manga panel, the rest of the crew, despite still not knowing the full context, all immediately being there for her... It will live in my head rent-free until I die.

Chapter 8: The Worst in the East

A good conclusion to the masterpiece that is the adaptation, but again, I am starving for more. Despite my problems with the changes in the previous episode, I thought the condensation in this episode was pretty all right.

The battle of Arlong Park was much shorter, obviously, but I still enjoyed it a lot! I like that they kept Usopp's first solo fight, and all-in-all, it lined up well with the manga. I am, however, so deeply disappointed at the omission of Usopp Hammer and Rubber Band of Doom. Like, I remember the first time I watched this episode of the anime in dub, and I had to pause it for five minutes because hearing Usopp trill "Rubber Band of Dooooooooom!" had me in hysterics, on the floor, laughing until I cried. They kept him pretending to be dead with hot sauce "blood," but not that? How could they do my boy like that? I did laugh at the whole, "I did it! ... Aaaaaaaaaand there was no one there to see it." That aside, the Zoro and Sanji team-up fight was awesome. The ZoSan banter really begins, and it was gratifying to really get to see Sanji shine in a fight since he didn't get to in the Baratie arc as much, as well as Zoro clutching at his wound throughout the fight! Also, I love that the singular "fuck" in the show went to Zoro, and it was directed at Buggy, "that fuckin' clown." Like, so iconic, so perfect, 100/10 moment right there. And, of course, Luffy's fight with Arlong. The teeth-shedding thing was so horrifying and gross, but again drove home the savagery behind Arlong's character. Obviously, they made some alterations to the fight because it would be hard to replicate in live action, but I was more concerned with them keeping the core of the fight: Luffy bringing down Arlong Park because it was all built upon Nami's pain and sacrifice, and that was rendered beautifully. I loved the shot of Arlong Park collapsing. It was so devastating and destructive in a way the anime wasn't, so the horror of the crew looking on as it came crumbling to the ground, wondering if Luffy was okay, and Luffy emerging from the rubble to validate Nami as their friend and a member of their crew gave me goosebumps.

Of course, it won't be a Straw Hat story without a party. I love that they used it as a way to tie the loose ends of the story together. Koby not only reaches the crux of his character arc by finally standing up to Garp and what he believes in, but Helmeppo begins to, too, but joining him, really cementing their friendship. We finally get to the meat of the tension between Garp and Luffy, and I loved the scene where Luffy grins and laughs, and Garp sees Roger in his head. It's a recurring theme in the manga/anime, and to see it here was gratifying. Also, the fact that Luffy got totally bodied by Garp was a good reminder that Luffy still has a long way to go; he will encounter stronger and stronger enemies henceforth, but will face them with a smile and unshakeable confidence and determination.

I loved the ending. I cried tears of joy at Koby bringing Luffy his wanted poster and them hugging and saying their true goodbyes... Luffy telling Koby to be a good marine, and Koby telling Luffy to be a good pirate. It was just so satisfying, so powerful, so solidifying of the friendship that will persist throughout the manga. Then, of course, it was exciting to see all the little scenes with the poster: Makino reading it, Kayagushing over Usopp in the backgriund, Zeff hanging it on the "Employee of the Month" board, Buggy seeing it and voicing that he'll kill Luffy and Alvida chiming in, hinting their team-up... And of course, the scene where Mihawk brings it to Shanks and they all celebrate. So nostalgic, but also so dripping with the overtone that the adventure doesn't end here; that the Straw Hats are only beginning. And that's paralleled by Koby and Helmeppo, too, beginning their training under Garp. And all of it topped off with the crew sailing forth on the Going Merry, with their sail unfurling to reveal the Jolly Roger, them making their vows on the barrel with it flashing back to their childhood selves... I truly felt like I had been a part of something special and was setting out on a new journey with the Straw Hats, and I can't wait to see where they're taken next, even if that never makes it to the screen.

[andoqin]

List of dramas that I am watching or want to watch, just for personal record reasons:

Cdramas:

The ingenious one (36/36): this drama has blown me away so far with its incredibly nuanced and sharp writing, its love stories between all the major couples and the absolutely magnificent cinematography. FINISHED verdict: HIGHLIGHT drama of the year for me so far. Smart, engaging, complicated, peak romance of all sorts, just what the doctor ordered tbh (overly long review can be found in my tags). 9.5

Chang Feng Du (40/40): I did not realise how close to the end I was. This drama is very pleasant and I adore our mains, but sadly except for a few highlights (the early beating gjs put on himself, the destruction of the gu family and the aftermath, the battle for wangdu) the writing hasn’t been able to keep the narrative tension up which is sad. FINSHED verdict: Very pretty and engaging in the beginning kinda loses me in the second half and then fizzles out emotionally, doesn't crash and burn but doesn't exactly stick the landing either 6.5

Gone with the rain (10/30): adore the gremlin4gremlin couple and from the spoilers I’ve seen not gonna adore much else

An ancient love song (1/16): incredible first episode and with only 30 min per ep and 16 eps in total this is gonna be a short fun ride I hope ( with lots of angst and tears naturally).

Here we meet again (18/32): started this for Wu Qian playing to type and Zhang BinBin being pretty but oh boy I’m struggling I just don’t care about the conflicts and in s surprising twist, I like the flashbacks to high school much much more, which is very funny if you think about the fact that the reason I started liking wu qian in the first place was because of her show stealing performance in the flashbacks of My Sunshine. I’ve been promised kisses in the near future so I’m gonna hold out till then but this might end up another drop.

Hidden Love (5/25): this one promises to be v sweet and kinda short but oh my god I have so many dramas on my plate rn so this might end up the first drop.

Till the end of the moon (22/40): I think I watched ep 1 when it started but then I got busy and now I am just staring at gifsets and crying, it’s definitely on the list to watch tho.

Heroes (6?/38): I started this a while ago, was really into it and then got busy… dammit. I might just rewatch the beginning so I can remember most of the set up for sure but man the visuals on this were so good, aaaa liu yuning.

Blood of youth (0/40): the last 12 months really have spoiled us with interesting looking wuxia dramas and this one is definitely on the list, I have been gifbaited once again.

Ray of light (0/30): usually hs dramas are something I avoid, but because I will not be watching the longest promise, for reasons, and bc @storge is a gifmaking temptress, this has made it on the list.

The legend of anle (0/39): Lmao trust YOUKU to screw up the release with bad subs only 1 ep even for vips and no released schedule… but at least I can put this on the backburner for now. Lmao should have known not to trust a youku dilreba drama, the tl has soundingly spoken and I'm gonna avoid this.

Ancient Detective (0/24): I was recced this by a friend when I mentioned my love for wuxia dramas, and since it’s almost shockingly short for a cdrama it’s on the list. EDIT: this got @purplehanfus seal of approval so it is def going up the list and since it's complete I'll probably at least watch it before the ongoing ones.

Butterflied love (0/22): see I barely made this post and already forgot about the screencap that got me started on writing it, the screencapa look great, but the drama is on mango, so who knows when I’ll truly be able to watch this

When I fly towards you (0/24): Well, I wasn't interested bc modern youth drama, but then I heard it described as "updated It Started with a Kiss" and... I'm weak? ISWAK was pretty much my crack gateway into asian dramas and while IDK if i could rewatch it today, something in me will always love this kind of story. Maybe it's like a quick palate cleanser in between since apparently eps are only about 30 mins.

Mysterious Lotus Casebook(0/40): CHENG YIIIII, in a possibly bromantic role? Or maybe het romance, I'll take it all. Plus I've already seen he's bleeding copious amounts as per his contract, so that's most of the checklist done.

Lost You Forever (0/??): because nature abhors a vacuum I apparently must have?? A minimum to watch pile and this actually and genuinely looks good??? A Yang Zi drama in 2023??? The mind boggles. Anyway I've been reading the recaps with delight, and am def going to watch this when part two airs in a couple of months but until then I have a thankful reprieve...

Kdramas:

See you in my 19th life (4/12): since kdramas release so slowly this is on the backburner but it does have some great gifsets that keep enticing meee

King the land (2/16): I am watching this for junho but it is kinda hard bc I have so much else on my plate and while I don’t mind a classic romcom type story I feel I need a bit more of an emotional hook

Story of the nine-tailed 1938 (0/16): so so many gorgeous and hilarious gifsets so little time. I loved season one so so much and the fact that this focuses on the brotherly relationship?? Extremely smart writing decisions were made!

The red sleeve (0/16): I blame @dangermousie for this she keeps reblogging angsts junho on my dash and I am but god’s weakest warrior.

Love tractor (0/8): gay himbo farmboy falls in love?? You bet this is on the list

Lady durian (0/?): ok this is only on the list for crack reasons but, daughter in law is in love with mother in law and both women are like 40+ truly kdramas have entered a new era and I kinda wanna be here for that

EDIT: Revenant (0/12): Kim Tae Ri in a spooky drama? POSSIBLY POSSESSED KIM TAE RI??? how could i forget to put her on this list, plus it was written by the Kingdom writer and I adore that drama plus it's only 12 eps which is smart in this case so... let's hope i get to it at some point D:

My dearest (2/20): I checked this out because it's got pretty much everything going for it from a production standpoint and boy did the first two eps deliver. This has got 2 seasons though so I'll probably wait until the second season is airing, since it won't be too long till season 2 or so the internet tells me.

My lovely liar (0/16): minhyun learned to act and I wanna see it happen!!

Jdramas:

Our dining table (2/10): ok this category is gonna be a bit shorter bc I haven’t watched too much drama recently but omg the gifs for this I am just crying thinking about it they look so cute??

Jack o‘frost (0/6): people have recced it and it’s short so here it is.

Utsukushii kare s2 (0/4): Season 1 was an unexpected delight so I hope s2 works just as well.

She loves to cook and she loves to eat (0/10): the manga for this is amazing (and hungry making) so I hope this adaptation holds up.

Ok this list is in no way exhaustive (well except for me being exhausted just trying toward this down) and probably subject to change ( I haven’t even looked at thaidramas or twdramas I gotta stop for now) but hopefully this will keep me on the ball and maybe I can add to it whenever a new tempting gifset crosses my dash…

[wen-kexing-apologist]

9 People You’d Like to Know More

tagged by @neuroticbookworm

Last Song I Listened To

The last song I listened to is one of my most very favorites, Gymnopédie No. 1 by Eric Satie. I have been listening to it for the last couple weeks to help me fall asleep. It is so pretty and reminds me of rain drops.

Currently Watching

Be My Favorite

The surprise show for me. I was not interested in this show, in it's concept, or in seeing Krist in anything. Ilike Gawin but didn't think he would be strong enough to carry half of this show. But after everyone I knew was saying week after week how surprised they were that they were actually liking it, I said "fuck it!" and tried it too. It has been very strong so far, and I owe Gawin an apology because he has been killing his role as Piseang.

Law of Attraction

Decided to get myself aboard the LoA train, mostly cause I like talking about shows with my friends, and my friends are watching this show. Also because I figured it is one that isn't deep enough to require my full attention and therefore something that I could watch at work. I've been enjoying it so far.

What Did You Eat Yesterday?

I've been showing my friend different BLs for the last couple of months. We just recently finished I Told Sunset About You and so I decided she needed a reward/cool down show, and this is one of my most favorite shows. So here we are, and can I just say, she is loving it so far!

Breaking Bad

Fun fact! I had seen the first season of Breaking Bad three separate times before I ever got past seeing any more of the show. This was not because I didn't like Breaking Bad, this was because different situations kept arising that prevented me from watching further than season 1, and eventually I gave up trying. But a friend of mine recently wanted me to watch it, because he likes it and thought it would be a good way for us to hang out together. I just finished Season 4 the other day and holy shit it is a really really good show. I was blown away by the episode Crawl Space, I was so shocked that it was not the end of the season because it felt like such a great place to end.

On Deck: Only Friends (coming out this Saturday and I am SO PUMPED, this has definitely been my most anticipated show of the year), Black Sails (@bengiyo has been wanting me to watch this, so my friend and I are gonna start season 1 as a palette cleanser before Season 5 of Breaking Bad)

Currently Reading

Currently, the only thing I am reading is Effective Data Visualization, 2nd Edition by Stephanie D.H. Evergreen. (I am going to be honest with you, I decided to answer this challenge mostly because I thought it would be funny for me to answer this question). I will say though, actually, this is a really easy read, Evergreen writes in a very conversational voice, so it keeps me reading, and I am learning so many Excel skills from it. Honestly, I think the name of this book should be changed from Effective Data Visualization: The Right Chart for the Right Data to Effective Data Visualization: How to Make Excel Your Bitch, but that's just me.

Current Obsession

uhhh, hmm. I think my current obsession is just...BL, I have been watching BL and writing and talking about BL almost non-stop for the last year. Go gays, woohoo!

__

Okay, now that I have made myself seem like the absolutely most boring person in the world, I guess I will tag:

@solitaryandwandering, @respectthepetty, @dribs-and-drabbles, @asdfghjklmpff, @shortpplfedup, @rocketturtle4, @colourme-feral, @bengiyo, @emotionallychargedtowel

[trampledore]

Maryland Opinion

Ok, so. It's late, but I have to share my thoughts. This is spoiler free at first:

- first of all, I am BLOWN AWAY. I loved every minute of it

- it was rather slow and pretty much completely character-driven, but gods, I could not stop watching until I had finished it

- Eve has been chronically underused in most of her roles, but this show really drove home just how much. The acting of literally everyone was phenomenal, but Eve's and Suranne's especially. There was just... so much raw emotions.

- pretty much from the first minute I loved Rosaline, and the character development was hella satisfying

- despite it being mostly tragic all-around, there was a lot of humour, mostly through Rosaline. So I really enjoyed that. And it was the sort of humour that shouldn't crack you up, but does

- all in all, it's a really good show and everyone involved should get awards for it, but I'm not sure how much general audiences will like it. Like I said, it's gripping bc of the characters and not much through the story imo

Here is the spoiler part (episodes 1-3):

- I can't help myself...I'm shipping her with the taxi driver. The scene at the lake might have been slightly cheesy but I totally melted. And the way she talked to him at his house...about her sickness. That really hit me hard.

- then there is the fight between her and Becca, where all the burried resentment comes out and she screams "this conversation makes me want to kill myself". I forgot to breathe for a moment. At the time we still didn't know that the cancer hadn't returned...

- when they read their mum's letter...the way she sobbed. Ngl it broke my heart... completely.

- when they identified their mum's body ... I just knew how their characters would react even before they got there. That's how well they established them in the first like 10min. Also...that tear...pls end me

- the way that I found most of their feelings and reactions so believable...loved it.

- but I have to admit, I am not a huge fan of love declarations and the sort of messages that their mum wrote them, or the discussion between Becca and her husband at the beach. That's the only stuff that seemed slightly artificial to me. The rest was really life-like in my opinion.

- and my concluding statement: Eve looked stunning. That's nothing new, but it had to be said.

Thank you for your attention.

[btstulip]

Begins≠Youth | Official Trailer #2

Begins≠Youth

This show.... it’s so much. I have been blown away by this story and I can’t stop thinking about it. It would have been easy to make this story entertaining and gripping by focusing on action portion of the plot. But the level of time and detail spent developing the characters and their relationships has made this show AMAZING!

Maybe spoilers? No details of the story is discussed, but I do talk about the overall focus of episodes 1-8.

There were a lot of different ways they could have told this story. The webtoon for example, while only a tiny part of the story, focused mainly on the events that happened to the characters. Because it was so short, there was no depth in exploring their relationships, characters, or events that brought them together or pulled them apart. I’ve watched and read many other stories that focus more on the events than on the characters, so I didn’t have any set expectations on how they would handle this story.

I didn’t realize I had any expectations for Begins≠Youth, but after only a couple episodes, it was obvious that the writing and acting was far better than I had I had anticipated. After episode 4, they had done such a good job developing the boys personalities, backgrounds and relationships that I had expected them to jump into the time looping and butterfly effect action part of the story.

So I was surprised when episode 5-8 didn’t start the next faze of the story and instead continued to unfold the storyline by giving us more reason to be invested in these characters and their bonds. There was more backstory, more damage, more gray/complex character development, more tension, until things started breaking in horrible and painful ways.

Now I am getting paranoid... there are only 4 episodes left... are they even going to get to the time looping??? Or will episode 12 end on a cliff hanger, Kim Hwan (Jin) waking up in the past on his first loop? There are still a lot of hours to tell this story, so it’s definitely possible for them to do it all in the remaining 4 episodes. But the level of time and detail they have gone into this far with the individual and group development has been FAR beyond anything I had imagined they would do.

I desperately hope we get a complete story. it would be evil to leave us with a bunch of broken boys.

This series has been incredibly well done so far and it’s a tragedy more people can’t watch it because of how it has been released. I highly recommend everyone try to watch it if you can find it. But be warned, they managed to make this story even more tragic than we could have imagined.

[part-time-zombie]

1, 8, 10 for ask game

For 1, I'd say three positive things about my current fandom(s) would be:

1: how freaking talented everyone is, be it fics or art I am always blown away with everything people make!

2: the awesome headcanons fans make about the Sides! They're all so neat and I often wind up wanting to write them into fics!

3: I love how despite the wait, we're all still here. It doesn't matter how long it's been or will be, I know I'll still be here and it's good knowing others will be too!

For 8: I kind of hope people will come to appreciate the simpler sanders sides episodes. I can't wait for the finale too, but the asides have given us so much for character tropes and dynamics and they're just to much fun to rewatch!

For 10, I'd say some blogs that make my fandom experience brighter will be pretty much all of my mutuals! @britt-ish123 and @lio-the-chaotic-nonbeanie-weenie in particular have really inspired and encouraged me to post my fics and I truly appreciate the kind words they've said, it's helped me become more positive and confident in my abilities!

[mordekaykt]

I can't believe this shit again, but here we go, after seeing recent insane, vapid takes on Becca Butcher's sexual assault and some serious consideration about whether it is worth to finally post this draft sitting around for 3 days and cause a potential shitstorm, I opted for yes. So let's see why Becca having been raped isn't unrealistic/her lying and that Homelander is very much someone with proclivity to commit sexual assault.

My target here is mostly those in the fandom who, even though condemning and clearly disagreeing with the horrible things Homelander does, AND at the same time acknowledge his trauma and the role of his upbringing, somehow ignore and deny that he's a rapist. I love this character and am blown away by Starr's portraying him and feel sorry and for what he's been through since day one of his birth, and understand that he's a result of his environment and inhumane treatment by Vought, a victim of the company himself. And while finding the chance slim, I'm also hoping for some kind of redemption for Homelander at least in the way that he recognizes his crimes and errors, and whatever his punishment will be, it's not just going to end up in a big circlejerk over his deserved downfall and the show watchers' joy over him suffering even more.

The fact that the alpha sigma whatever male shitheads don't believe she was raped isn't even surprising so this post is clearly not meant for them. That would be like trying to explain poetry to a a bag of trash, and if anyone dares come up with the unsubstantiated and proven false, MRA-perpetuated "but evil wahmmen lie about rape often" I'm not even going to bother to engage, since a man is more likely to be raped by another than falsely accused by a woman. Resources on this issue at the bottom of this post.

And if any of you're thinking why I am making this into a big deal because this is just a TV show, well these beliefs and attitudes don't just exist for fiction, they persist in real life, against real rape survivors. But the biggest takeaway for many of you from this is gonna be crying about how toxic and mean this fandom is because someone called you out for your garbage takes anyways.

Particularly are some insane and absurd reasoning that I've seen around here, such as 1)Homelander isn't a rapist because that's unlike him, he exerts power over people in ways other than rape) 2)Why didn't Becca tell Butcher, who would have believed her?

Your reasons and arguments as to why Becca wasn't raped are vapid and can be debunked in a second after watching the necessary scenes. You can like a character all you want, but it's very tiresome and immature how him committing rape is downright rejected and dismissed not to hurt one's worldview. Apart from the fact that Becca explicitly says she was raped, you ignore a major contributor factor, namely that Homelander is a misogynist. It's laughable having to spell this out, but it's glaringly obvious from multiple scenes.

In season 2 episode 5 during the scene where Billy is about to rescue Becca from the Vought facility, but she doesn't bring Ryan and refuses to escape, SHE ALSO VERY CLEARLY TELLS SHE WAS RAPED, explaining to Billy why she didn't disclose her assault.

"He raped me and when I found out I got pregnant, I didn’t come to you. I didn’t come to you because I was scared, cause I knew you that you’d chase after him and you would seek revenge and that wouldn't be good for anyone." She says this word from word, and it's the same conversation where she says Billy was always one bad day away from bludgeoning someone to death in a parking lot. How could you catch onto that part but ignore what I highlighted now?

In season one, after Butcher storms out of the supe collateral damage survivor group, he tells Hughie what happened to Becca. He says that a security camera recorded Becca sitting on the same bench him and Hughie are sitting now, for three hours and she didn't move a muscle, after she left Vought Tower and Homelander (can't attach more screenshots because of the 30 per post limit).

This in itself is already suspicious, but let's say she just committed adultery and is regretful, sitting there reflecting on it, sure. In season one, there is room for some ambiguity (even though from this information alone - sitting there barely moving for hours - one should suspect this truly wasn't a consensual encounter. Obviously, when you only focus on how much you hate Butcher and view everything coming from his as lie and manipulation, you miss the details) since everything we know about what happened to Becca were from Billy and - during the season finale confrontation - Homelander's recollections and words. Season two makes it very clear what happened, at least for people with functional brain cells.

The way so many people dismiss and doubt rape survivors because they aren't perfect victims (not having physical injuries, they willingly stayed alone with the accused rapist - an attitude regarding Becca I see often, dumbfucks saying that she went to the conference room with Homelander on her own, she didn't look hurt , and the Homelander "doesn't come across as a rapist/it's just not in character for him") is vomit inducing.

Billy Butcher is very far from a good man, yes - he is also abusive, violent, manipulative and treats people around him horribly to achieve his goals - and the show going with the Becca fleeing him after a one night stand with Homelander version could have worked, totally, if they decided to go down that route. But their encounter was very clearly not consensual, regardless how hard is it to accept.

Your argument that Homelander being a rapist is OOC because mommy milk fetish and whatnot, completely ignores that Homelander is a massive misogynist, and it clearly manifests. He mocks women, denigrates women all the time. And there are a bunch of examples for this.

When, in S01E05 Stillwell (she is a groomer that's absolutely true) dares not babysit him and takes her son to the doctor he comes with the "strong single mom" which is very typical jab for putting down women.

Moms who raise their children on their own are routinely diminished and made fun of, whereas the same cannot be found for single fathers. It is a misogynistic attitude stemming from viewing the woman as someone who failed to secure herself the father of her child, putting all the blame on her and nothing on the absent father (who might even be deceased in certain circumstances, not just deadbeat). When you write in Google "hatred single mom misogyny" the bloody related searches look like this:

He tries to have Starlight put on a sexualized dance for his birthday, in season 3 to objectify and undermine her, he forces her into a fake pretend relationship, then to anger both her and Hughie he talks about her (“is she a good fuck?”) like a piece of meat he is bargaining about, as if she wasn’t even there as a human being.

In season 1 episode 7 when he confronts the Seven, showing the pictures of Hughie and the Boys and accuses Starlight of being a traitor who’s cooperating with the boys, he mocks her sexual assault by Deep; “I know that you want to make this whole Deep thing an All the single ladies’ moment – power, right?”. His posture and tone clearly indicate he means power in this context as women’s power to call out and have their rapists and abusers face consequences, power as in women’s empowerment altogether – and how ridiculous he finds the whole concept. This shows how lowly he thinks about women’s issues and agencies.

More on the Deep, Homelander brings him back in S03E02 to hurt and distress Starlight, HE DELIBERATELY REINTRODUCES THE MAN INTO THE TEAM WHO ORALLY RAPED HER. He tries to gaslight and use her faith against her very obvious fury (“Doesn’t Christ tell us to turn the other cheek?”) to minimize and dismiss Starlight’s trauma and objection to her rapist’s presence.

He wants to harvest Maeve's eggs (which might not be sexual but is reproductive exploitation - but yeah, a man who'd do this to a woman without consent is definitely not rapey right?), and the passive aggressive touching-almost-kissing her in S01E03 at A-Train's race are signs of a man who is unhealthily jealous and obsessive over his intimate partners (signs of an abuser). Maeve is visibly uncomfortable, tries to brush it off with a grin and refusal to indulge in the topic of their breakup.

Now, this is personal, but I’m sure way too many women can relate to situations when you tried to prevent being hurt at the hands of a violent, emotionally unstable man by a smile and appearing meek and harmless.

And another very important detail the implications of which I'm sure 99% of the viewers miss (unless you've been with a physically abusive partner), is how quick he is to engage in intimate partner violence: and there are two major instances of this during his relationship with Stormfront. After he burns down his trailer when she leaves him for hours as he's waiting for her in the trailer, with the bouquet of flowers, she arrives back and descends onto film set piece he's standing on and tries to explain herself. He reaches for her neck, and doesn't yet strangle her, but the hand and the implication are a clear sign of how he is absolutely ready to act physically violent towards his partner after a single confrontation, just because she was gone for a few hours and didn't tell him where she was.

In another scene, once again following Stormfront being absent, Homelander is standing in her apartment with his back facing her (you can see the scaffolding in this scene after they wrecked the apartment during sex in E05).

"Remember when you said you don't break easily?" He doesn't engage physically, but his posture and words are very much threatening. He is a man who has absolutely zero qualms in using physical intimidation against his partners. He is violent and ready to cause harm to anyone, of course, since he can do whatever the fuck he wants, and his intimate partners aren't an exception.

And an important fact here for real life: a man who puts his hands around your neck to threaten and intimidate is very much likely to kill you next - actually 750% more likely.

An abusive man being a rapist is anything but a rare occurrence. And delving further into his behavior with Becca, it's very far from him trying to pretend that he is a part of some fantasy of an all-American happy family. The fact that some of you go awww at him basically using his son and Becca's love for her child to force her to participate in some kind of nonexistent, loving family scenarios while she is clearly, visible uncomfortable through it all (the breakfast with pancakes scene has it all), is painfully ignorant and shows clear lack of empathy for a mother who has to play nice with the man who ruined her entire life without an ounce of regret. When he is with Ryan and Becca, he further abuses her through the child. He is deliberately trying to alienate him from his mother, turning his against her and undermine Becca's maternal role, which culminates in him and Stormfront taking Ryan away. But he's so cute and babygirl for roleplaying as if he's actually part of a family, right?

"But but Becca was so mean for hiding Ryan and preventing him from experiencing life by having him live in a fake, shut off facility! Homelander just told his son the truth which he deserved to know!" You shitheads missed the part wherein Vogelbaum said she had to sign and NDA and never tell about this to anyone in exchange for Vought providing her with safety during the gestation and birth? You think Vought would have allowed her to take The Homelander's son and live casually like civilians? It was in their interest to keep Ryan, the first natural born supe hidden first and foremost from his father, so they might have a chance at using him as contingency against his father if needed - this is referred to by Butcher in S02E08 during his conversation with Stand Edgar, when Billy was bargaining with him. And Becca had every fucking reason to want to stay hidden and off radar and never want to meet her rapist again.

And while Homelander invades her home where she was basically banished after what he'd done to her, Becca must stand there and hold her mouth shut because she wants to protect her child who is way too young and naive to recognize the patterns his rapist father is utilizing, let alone understand what rape is. In S02E02, after dropping Ryan off at piano practice and she races to talk to Dr. Park, she is enraged, distressed and on the verge of crying, demanding an explanation. She begs to be relocated to safety; she was promised how “I would never have to see him again”. He pleads with the man on the phone, “You have to protect us.”

And when she has to endure her rapist’s presence, she is obviously very uncomfortable with his presence, that much is clear from her body language (SE2E02 when Homelander walks past her after she calls Ryan inside to do his math homework, he brushes her arm, and she flinches away). A screenshot doesn't do this justice but re-watching merely this scene will show you what I mean, on Prime Video at 00:06:52.

You say it's likely she was walking on eggshells around Billy back when they were together (which can be), but you are blind to her actually walking on eggshells and being extremely uncomfortable in Homelander's company?

After Homelander pushes Ryan off the roof she straight out says "you don't get to say that [call himself the father] after what you did to me!" He doesn't deny nor tries to challenge her accusation, he simply responds by saying all he did was give her a son, before he grabs her to intimidate her physically.

And after watching Becca being so tormented, scared and anxious about this man, some of you have the galaxy brain take of “uhm akshuelly, he can’t be a rapist, that’s so unlike him, duh.”

There is a strong correlation between men being rapists and holding misogynistic beliefs. It's a part of rape culture. Just like victim blaming, what you are also doing if you think she couldn't have been raped because she wasn't physically injured, Homelander just "doesn't give off rapist vibes" and so on.

Because the fact is that this man has everything going on - childhood trauma, exposure to violence, stunted emotional development, entitlement, misogynistic attitudes - for him that make it believable and 100% in character for him to rape.

A South-African study involving incarcerated rapists meant to examine perspectives and reasoning behind rape found that

a combination of emotional, social and cognitive adversities have been implicated in deviant behavior (e.g., antisocial behavior and an impaired ability to be accountable for actions) and sexual offenses (Ward and Beech, 2006). Adverse outcomes are shaped by the individual’s social, cultural, physical and interpersonal environment which has an impact on their emotional state, ability to act appropriately, to control emotions, perceptions of reality and modeling memories related to socially acceptable behavior (Ward and Beech, 2006). An important social/environmental factor that shapes emotional and cognitive states in adulthood is childhood trauma exposure (Carr et al., 2013). Men exposed to severe childhood trauma, e.g., abuse, neglect, community violence exposure and adverse parenting styles, are more likely than non-exposed men to develop depression, post-traumatic stress disorders, anxiety disorders, poor cognitive functioning and impaired learning (Gunnar and Vazquez, 2001; Bilbo and Schwarz, 2012; Scoglio et al., 2021). They are also more likely to display violent, antisocial behavior and to become chronic perpetrators of rape (Fox et al., 2015; Piotrowska et al., 2015; Moffitt, 2018). Victimized children also often have more violence supportive attitudes especially when exposed to domestic violence as children along with widespread societal exposure and acceptance of violence against women (Debowska et al., 2021). Social and contextual factors encouraging male entitlement, hyper-masculinity, toxic masculinity and unequal gender norms are other key factors that drive rape perpetration (Maneta et al., 2017; Selepe et al., 2020). Hyper-masculinity and toxic masculinity are associated with insecurities, hypersensitivity, distrust toward women and satisfaction obtained from controlling and dominating women (Malamuth et al., 1996). Rape perpetrators often describe rape as a way to exert power, dominance and control over women and use it indirectly as a tool to conceal insecurities (Selepe et al., 2020). Linked to this, male entitlement, where men believe that they have total control over women and their bodies, influences them to perpetrate sexual violence (Selepe et al., 2020). One study reported that male perpetrators believe that as men, they are entitled to sex with their female partners regardless of their consent, especially if they are married (Adinkrah, 2011).

If you are pondering on "Why didn't she tell?", you are a extremely ignorant and lacking emotional intelligence. You have no idea what it feels to be sexually assaulted, that much is clear. It's not as easy as just going and talking about it, even to someone you love and trust, because of the shame and humiliation the victim feels and how much they blame themselves for what happened. Sometimes, even the victims themselves doubt whether what happened to them was actually rape.

• According to the Arizona Coalition to End Sexual Violence and Assault , there are many reasons why victims may choose not to report to law enforcement or tell anyone about what happened to him/her. From the reasons listed by them, the ones that apply in the context of Becca are concern for not being believed, fear of the attackers getting back at him/her, embarrassment or shame, fear of being blamed.

• A lack of education on consent and misconceptions about sexual violence can make it difficult for someone to identify when an assault or rape is taking place. Research by the End Violence Against Women (Evaw) coalition shows that widespread confusion over rape and its consequences is prevalent. According to Evaw research, 33% of people in Britain think it is not usually rape if a woman is pressed into having sex but there is no physical violence. One in 10 people are not sure or think it is usually not rape to “have sex with a woman who is asleep or too drunk to consent”. Research by the sexual health charity the Family Planning Association has shown that only 47% of people think it is acceptable to withdraw consent if they are already naked.

• Research suggests that it can take years – sometimes decades – for some survivors to realise or accept that their experience amounts to sexual assault or rape. Psychologists refer to this as “unacknowledged rape” or “unacknowledged assault”. One study on the subject from the US estimates a staggering 60% of female university students have experienced unacknowledged rape. Other studies have determined that between 30% and 88% of all sexual assaults go unacknowledged by survivors.

On false rape accusations by Rape Crisis Scotland:

An extensive study into rape case attrition undertaken by Kelly et al in 2005 concluded that the rate of false allegations stood at 3%.

A study produced by the Crown Prosecution Service in England & Wales in March 2013 revealed that over a 17-month period between January 2011 and May 2012 – when all false allegation cases were referred to the DPP – there were 5,651 prosecutions for rape, but only

35 for making false allegations of rape.

In Scotland, rape and attempted rape have the lowest conviction rate of any crime type. However an acquittal does not mean that the allegation was false, it means that the jury did not consider that the Crown had proved the case beyond reasonable doubt.

Weiser’s 2017 overview and analysis of the false report literature highlighted that studies applying rigorous and correct methodologies ‘consistently find that the false report rate is estimated to be between 2% and 10%’.

Channel 4’s 2018 fact check reinforced the fact that false allegations of rape are rare, concluding that ‘Men are more likely to be raped than be falsely accused of rape’.

A separate fact check conducted the same year by Full fact concluded that as a figure for the number of reported rapes based on false allegations: ‘Evidence from England and Wales suggests that 3-4% is a reasonable estimate.’

[vergess]

So, have you watched the new Doctor Who episodes? What do you think of them if yes?

Yes

I LOVED IT ALL SO MUCH

Hugely relieved that the nostalgia tour is now over; I don't think my neurons could tolerate much more of it

I think my favourite is still The Star Beast because I enjoy when Doctor Who gets all hamfisted about social issues. I'm a sucker for that!!

But oh man, oh man, the Giggles!!! The music sequence! The ending!!! AHHHHH

And then the fucking. The direction on Wild Blue Yonder, fuuuuck. Like, I expected the actors to be amazing; it's Tennant and Tate. To describe them as "good actors" does not capture the skill that they have specifically in working together.

But I was blown away by how well it was directed!! The fucking scenes where you as an audience member are realizing "wait, that's not how the Doctor talks to Donna normally.... WAIT THAT'S NOT THE DOCTOR AT ALL" just. Delicious. Perfectly done. Which is extra wild to me when looking at the dirctero's other credits which are ummm. Not that good, shall we say.

And THEN you find out that the torso-and-head framing of each camera shot was So On Purpose and it just!!!

It was all so good.

Oh man, I know I'm the specific target demographic being pandered to (queer millennials who loved Eccleston, obsessed over Tennant, enjoyed Smith, wandered off during Capaldi, and bounced off Whittaker).

I was always going to love it. It's designed to make me love it!

it's designed to bait with nostalgia. I know that. I recognize it.

But the thing is? Oh my god, the thing is, instead of a nasty little trap, the bait was just to get you SO HYPE for Gatwa.

And it worked. I'm so much more excited for his run than I was beforehand. Like. WAY more hype.

I was excited enough for him that I knew I would watch his Christmas special and probably the first 1-3 episodes of his run.

Now? Just from the little sample we got of the way Gatwa will be carrying this role, in the context of the more child-friendly* approach that earmarks Davies as a Doctor Who showrunner?

I'm SO fucking COMMITTED. I wanna see where they take him. I have always preferred the... the times when DW is like... Cringe? But earnestly cringe? Hamfisted social messages. Monsters that sound absurd until you see then. Monsters that stay absurd even as you're hooked. AMVs as threats.

All that shit is MADE to please me specifically.

AND BUDDY!!!!!!!!!! I AM PLEASED!!!!!!!!!!

I cannot WAIT to see the Situations they're going to put Gatwa's doctor in and watch him get out of them. He has the perfect level of charismatic charm and genuine emotion.

Normally I need to see the Doctor and his Companion interact before I can get a sense of the pathos the actor will bring to the role and how they work off the writing and direction.

But shiiiiiiit, Gatwa came out swinging and I already have SUCH high hopes.

And this hasn't even gotten to how fuckin' diverse the backgrounders were in these specials. They really said, "okay, we have filled these scenes out with too many unmarked people, we need to dial that down." And I know, I know, packing your background with diverse actors (race, gender, ability, etc) while you foreground two white, abled actors that were brought in specifically to be nostalgia bait is, like, on paper it's a bad look.

But they gave those backgrounders each a lot more charm and character in their writing than I was expecting. Everything from Sgt Singh's suspicion loosening to military obedience and Shirley saying "don't make me the problem just go" to Rose reframing her mother's tic into a statement of her own independent power.

(Yes I know Davies has a thing about how he writes moms but listen I'm going to let him have that one)

And fuuuuuuck meeeeee, but they just KEEP saying trans rights, even after The Star Beast ended.

I just really, really enjoyed all 3 so much.

*Child-friendly isn't the right term, but I've gotten through the whole post and I can't figure out better phrasing. What I mean is, under Moffat and Chibnall, Doctor Who was not for children. The show didn't go out of its way to exclude them, but it certainly didn't try to provide education, entertainment or even engagement for them.

Doctor Who is not "a kids show" but critically, it shouldn't be "an adult show" either. It functions at its best as a family show. Something you can watch with your parents and your kids both on the same couch, and everyone enjoy it. This is an absurdly difficult line to walk. It's why Disney had so many years of failure before the renaissance.

And one of the ways people fail to walk that line is by treating children as an afterthought (Chibnall), or not at all (Moffat). Meanwhile, Davies's previous stint as Showrunner did a phenomenal job of bringing up The Horrors in ways that would put adults on edge while letting Children also enjoy the ride.

And the same is true of these 3 episodes.

I think "can kids get really into it too" is an extremely important benchmark for this type of scifi (and, I think it's part of why many modern Star Trek properties are so fucking tedious).