#end the gender binary

[roomwithavoid]

trans people in sports/bathrooms

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

This one is for all my fellow "My gender is 'I have a job and I can't worry about that right now"'. I see you.

(part 1, part 2)

[souldagger]

so normal about the gender fuckery of the Polish murderbot translation (lie i am on the verge of tears)

[angel-archivist]

It's so interesting and so exceedingly frustrating how agab is being utilized now within the queer community as a way to isolate and sort nonbinary and genderqueer folks into binary boxes that determine their moral purity levels, and their authority to do and write and exist.

The way nonbinary writers are being put under accusation of fetishizing gay men while their AGAB is continually brought up in a way that feels like queer-space-approved misgendering.

The way feminist circles that are supposedly trans-inclusive will use the word AFAB in a way that implicitly but intentionally isolates nonbinary people who aren't AFAB from joining. It's for women*.

The way the language is already flawed and leaves out intersex folks from the conversations while focusing on a binary of sex that isn't truthful.

The constant obsessing over whether someone is AFAB or AMAB and whether or not that gives them the privilege to join, do, write, or be present in certain spaces really really concerns me. How are we supposed to dismantle a binary system of gender if we can't even move past forcibly assigning and focusing on people's genders assigned at birth?

[genderkoolaid]

i think "nonbinary" can be useful but a lot of times the way it is being used isn't helpful to actually discussing nonbinary people, especially since it is a HUGE umbrella term with very few boundaries. like there are nonbinary men & women, so positioning "nonbinary" as something intrinsically separate from man/woman isn't accurate. or there are times where it would be more useful to name the specific group (like multigender people, androgynes, abinary/aphorians) rather than a much vaguer term

in general the problem is that our language to describe nonbinary existence is basically some scraps held together with duct tape. there's sooo many ways in which nonbinary people are erased or binaried through language. not just through the lack of gender neutral options but the la of blatantly genderqueer ones.

i kinda feel like as of right now, nonbinary-ness is pretty slapdash & all over the place and it would be helpful to have a large-scale discussion on what terminology would be best for discussing things like exorsexism and it's various aspects, and how to talk about nonbinary people without homogenizing us, while ALSO acknowledging the need for umbrella terms that can cover a range of individual identities, even if people don't personally identify with the umbrella term itself. & on that note we should also probably discuss the issue of. like. perfectionism wrt nonbinary language & the way that potentially useful terms get lost bc of it. I don't think nonbinary people can really achieve meaningful equality and inclusion on the same level until we are able to have equally diverse and useful ways of describing ourselves, and a stronger understanding of how we relate to each other as a community.

[mister13eyond]

I think people in general would be less weird about gender and trans people if it were just made more clear how incredibly artificial the idea of a human sexual dichotomy really is

External genitalia is the same basic structures configured in slightly different ways, and it's less of a binary set of options than a spectrum between two poles as intersex people fully prove

Secondary sex characteristics are entirely dependent on hormones, which means they a.) already have a wide variety of natal presentations across genders (ex cis women capable of growing facial hair, cis men with breast tissue etc are all completely normal (if slightly uncommon) outcomes) and b.) Are extremely easy to change with HRT

Hormones can affect PHYSICAL reactions to emotions (higher testosterone making anger an easier physical reaction to stress than tears, and higher estrogen vice versa) but it doesn't actually affect the ways you think about or react to things, just what your body does with that emotion.

Social and behavioral differences are EXTREMELY affected by nurture more so than nature and there are no inherent neurological differences between men and women's brains.

Our bodies are so similar to one another that transition- while socially and financially potentially difficult- is MEDICALLY incredibly fucking easy. The fact that we can just alter our secondary sex characteristics with medications and our external genitalia with fairly simple surgeries should be a clue how incredibly close all human bodies are? We Have the possibility to change so easily because there are not inherent, hardwired unmovable differences. The only real difference at this point is the capability to carry and birth children, and with the way science is going that doesn't seem like an impossible breakthrough at this point.

Idk, I'm so tired of seeing discourse from other trans people that upholds that there are fundamental differences between men and women. Until we all start agreeing that these categories are artificially enforced and that they aren't really biologically inherent whatsoever we're never going to get anywhere

[the-casbah-way]

some people are not going to like this but there is not in fact a rigid red line between cis people and trans people and acting like there is isn't helpful for anyone

[tepli-mravenci]

The genderfluid representation I personally really want to see one day is a reoccurring background/supporting character in a movie/series that just sometimes presents feminine for a few days but then that same character presents masculine next few days, then one feminine day again then you can't even tell

and everyone just uses whatever pronouns for them and noone says anything about the changing presentation the character just exists there and we know it's still the same character and noone calls them genderfluid it's just commonly understood this character is fluid and it's no big deal no profound struggle no "true" sex or gender reveal it's just Sam from the coffee shop he makes the best lattes and she gives a discount to the main character for protagonist reasons

Alternatively every character that knows them thinks they're a different gender Stacy thinks Sam's a girl and has a crush on her, Billy is convinced Sam's a guy and does a handshake with him and they call each other bro, Max is too embarrassed to ask so they just always use they/them pronouns for Sam

It's never "revealed" which pronoun is right because they all are sometimes

[kraviolis]

im god's strongest soldier bcus i've been headcanoning luz as a trans girl since before we even knew she was canonically bi

[isan0rt]

Hot take but insisting on using they/them pronouns for Xion, the LITERAL ONLY character in Kingdom Hearts who aggressively and intentionally tells people she is a girl and expresses dysphoria about being misgendered as not-a-girl, is fundamentally no different than Saix refusing to stop calling her 'it' send post.

[proudfreakmetarusonikku]

genuine question but how is transfem and transmasc meant to be any more inclusive to nonbinary people than trans woman and trans man. bc like in my experience it’s just lead to people forcing nonbinary people to choose what binary gender they’re arbitrarily closer too and categorising them as one of two options depending on that. which like. my experience hasn’t lined up with what ive seen from transmascs or transfems. i don’t like describing myself as either. i'm agender, how are terms that are still incredibly gendered meant to make people like me more comfortable in the community.

[toastysol]

I don't get why everyone's surprised that the brotherhood use the correct pronouns with Dane. I think people have forgotten a major aspect of the fallout environment. The bombs falling destroyed conventional societal norms. This includes any political agenda to erase trans people from history and the future. Also this is fiction. The brotherhood of steel are not a conservative christian political party. They care about what they dub "abuse of technology", this includes the biproducts thereof. The only people who fit that category are synths and mutants who they view as abominations that need to be exterminated. If trans people even counted as abuse of technology (which they don't and shouldn't, as the technology used for transition is helpful and not hurtful), they would be so far down the list the brotherhood wouldn't care. Why would they care. It's really not a big deal imo. It's a big deal in OUR world, but not theirs. Not by a long shot.

[doctor-disc0]

As a trans person, I consider myself very lucky that my birth name is pretty gender neutral and thus doesn't give me dysphoria

[nellasbookplanet]

Mass Effect is this really interesting case study of male-as-default vs female-as-default in non human species, because they give us such prominent examples of both.

Turians, salarians, and krogan all have women, yet none are seen on screen until the third game, and even then we get like, one of each in minor roles. Less prominent species like hanar, volus and elcor all have male voices, despite hanar being canonically genderless and volus' gender being considered a 'mystery'. It would've been easy to include female voice actors to any of these, or have an alien with a typically "male" sounding voice be referred to by she/her pronouns (frankly that would make sense for elcor and krogan, but by the time we finally get a krogan woman she sounds just like an ordinary human woman). And this isn't even getting into referring to genderless aliens with neutral pronouns, which seems to never have occurred to anyone as an option (fair enough, they/them pronouns weren’t exactly mainstream in 2007).

But no. The idea of gender as removed from human defaults to male, either visually, vocally, or in terms of pronouns. Voices meant to sound genderless, such as Legion and the hanar, still have male voice actors. None if of this is ever in-game commented upon. It’s just How It Is. The only species other than human in which we see a fairly equal balance of men to women is the quarians, interestingly one of the most human looking aliens outside of asari.

With the all female asari however, not only are they designed to look explicitly human (which they then in-game try to weasel themselves out of by going 'but ALL species find the asari hot, not just humans!' as if we don’t all have eyes), we are also beaten over the head with it constanly. Every single bar you walk into, there are half naked asari dancers. You are constantly hearing background chatter about how hot they are. A genderless character coded as female HAS to be explicitly and traditionally hot, while anything removed from that defaults to male.

The closest we get to non-human looking women is the rachni queen (which I'm guessing is only because of the age old trope of the queen of an insect hive mind) and EDI before she is given a body (at which point we are again beaten over the head with 'non-human coded as female (EDI) has to be hot' vs 'non-human coded as male (geth) get to be actually removed from human').

[girlboyburger]

Its-using animals club!

Alas i feel your pain, especially when someone's go-to response is "isn't using it/its dehumanizing?"

right. like. it doesn't matter if you think it's dehumanizing. it's what i want to be called, and like my name, you'll call me by it / its or we will not be having further conversation.

to me, personally, that's like. kind of a huge part of the appeal? full respect to those living in the "it can be a moment, it can be the mountains or the sunset" because, me too! but also a massive appeal to it / its is i can easily sum my gender up as some kinda boygirlthing. it/its he/she. like an animal you don't know the gender of.