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alyjojo · 8 months ago

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May 🏋🏻 2024 Monthly - Capricorn

Preshuffle: Justice, Ace of Swords, Justice, a decision is definitely being made, you’ve received all of the clarity you need on a romantic situation. Either it ends here, or it’s time to begin, some of it - simultaneously.

Meditation: Just a song for you, “Knock Three Times”, you always get the older ones, it makes me laugh. And your door was there to knock on. Simple and cute. I’m loving the song 🥰

Main energy: Knight of Swords

I’m just…what? Capricorn is being confrontational? Getting information? Making themselves clear? Drawing a line in the sand? Not leaving any room for confusion? Whew 😅 That’s attractive af, some of y’all tend to be emotionally constipated and have a hard time communicating openly. If this Knight is not you, and it’s someone else, consider the emotionally constipated message. *Someone* is acting this way, it’s this or that. 9 Wands clarifies…it’s been difficult to get something started. Or restarted even, you could be healing a connection and having a brand new beginning with them, or you could be meeting someone new and forming a brand new connection. Manifesting love ❤️ That’s the goal, and if not love then a genuine connection, there is no time for games with these kinds of swords. Very mature of you, I assume it’s you.

What’s going on in May:

Ace of Swords:

Yassss. Communication, clarity, seeing the light 💡 on a situation, this can be an idea that hits you suddenly, the truth. This could be the “where is this going?” conversation or just being completely transparent about your own wants, needs, and long term desires. 2 Wands clarifies with planning the next step, you’re not diving to into anything you’re not prepared for, whatever you’re doing is being done in the most prepared, honest, intelligent way. Or if someone else, then you can count on this person, they make damn sure they’re clear as crystal - no room for interpretation here 💯 You go back and forth on someone’s feelings, maybe your own. Could be same sex or platonic, two Queens showing up, and the goal is victory. Deep connection. Mutual love. So someone is getting to the point of it all, here’s what I want, here’s how I feel, etc., so they may hopefully reach victory, cooperation, the next step. A second date, whichever. I really like this energy 💜

6 Wands:

You want victory, success, overcoming a stage of difficulty - Penguin is at the bottom of the animal oracles, Strength clarifying shows you or someone else has held back how they really feel about something. This. You. Where it’s going. You want this new beginning, The Fool shows you’re ready to take a leap into love, friendship, adventure (also at the bottom). You’re ready for the fun parts of this, enough of the awkwardness or hesitating already. If there’s been some kind of drama, you want to move on from that peacefully.

8 Wands:

There are a lot of messages, a lot of communication going on, I’m kinda surprised by this energy from you. Maybe you’re an airy kind of person, have air placements, or are dealing with someone that does. The Hanged Man clarifies - more beautiful energy - showing you’ve gained perspective in this situation, and want to share all that you know. It doesn’t necessarily have to be with this person, maybe you’ve been dating awhile, you understand the dance of “I don’t know you & let’s act weird for the first few weeks.” You’ve passed this already, either you meet someone initially and it’s like “Here’s who I am and what I want, now you.”, or you’ve had it out with someone - could be minor - and you are like “Lesson learned.” Because you care, you want cooperation from this person, and you’re ready for FUN. Or they are 💯 Your energies of Raspberry & Purple Brick can show pickiness, high standards, fear, unnecessary worries - either that’s going on internally, you’re dealing with that kind of emotion form someone else, or you are the hesitant one and they’re like 👏 chop 👏 chop let’s do this 👏. 9 Cups at the bottom, this is what you want, you or they just aren’t trying to make any wrong decisions.

3 Pentacles:

This is the hope & desire, everyone working together equally in tandem, everyone on the same page feeling-wise. If you’re dealing with a romantic connection, King of Pentacles is here to match the Queen. Having seen the other Queen earlier, someone may have had a difficult relationship that’s now over, and this is the new one, the intention is that this goes how it should, no confusion, no outside parties, no bs. The Pentacles pair mean business. Doesn’t have to be romantic with the other Queen, it could be a friend, coworker, sibling, whoever - or just the deeper feelings of one, and the partners here are just being clear as day to boundaries, what this is, what effort we’re putting in, could be a nanny/babysitter for the kids - if that applies. If a 3rd energy exists at all, it feels transactional, someone you hire (or pay child support to idk). Not someone in the way. It’s possible this 3rd energy has a crush or something, like the babysitter flirts with your person, and it’s just immediate no. Not only no, but they’re not coming back, enjoy your life Susie. Boundaries are being upheld, there is respect and teamwork between two (maybe three) people, and it’s a beautiful thing.

The World:

Clarified by Justice. 10 Cups at the bottom. The correct, responsible, balanced, fair decisions are being made - no foolery. Idk why I keep saying that but it’s important. Happy family, the fairy tale ending, the long term dream is at the bottom of the deck, no one here is playing with that energy. It’s like once you know what you want, that’s what you want and that’s the end of it, isn’t it? I’m not seeing Libra energy strongly, maybe with this Knight, but I’m definitely feeling it - the whole reading is balanced, being very clear, wanting a healthy and transparent connection moving forward - in love. Justice ⚖️ For many. Friendship or partnership for others, you could be working with a couple on something and just being very clear where you stand - if so, it’s appreciated. I don’t get any ill feelings from any direction 💜

Signs you may be dealing with:

Capricorn, Sagittarius, Aries, Leo, Aquarius & Libra

Oracle: ✨

Hesitation 🤔

Decision - Confusion - Worry

Care 🤗

Parenthood - Patron - Support

Blue Heron 🐦

“Make a stand for what you believe in and do what feels right in spite of any judgement or disapproval from others.”

Trust your deepest sense of knowing what the right action is and do it, and don’t rely on others to tell you what to do or how to act. Not everyone will approve of the decisions you make, and if your choice goes against the grain of what others expect from you, you’ll no doubt run into criticism and judgement. Stand still and look around you. You’re doing just fine in spite of others’ assessments of you. Besides, your greatest & most fulfilling support comes from that place inside that guides you by revealing signs that tell you which path to follow. Heeding these signs keeps you in alignment with your true path. You may have to put both feet in the water and dredge through others disapproval, asserting yourself where needed. Trust in your inner knowing, and let it be the source of your strength to keep moving forward.

We enter into May as:

Righteous Raspberry 💅🏽:

“I have the same high standards for myself as I do for others.”

This is a message to lighten up! Notice your present attitude towards others. Perhaps you’re being too hard on yourself, and others as well. Allow others to be as they are. Supporting others around you creates allies. Watch your expectations, you could be setting yourself up for disappointment. You cannot be satisfied if you expect others to live up to standards you can’t even live up to. Besides, others are not you. Do it wrong, mess it up, have flaws. Trying to make the world perfect will only exhaust and alienate. Allow things to simply be. Look for what’s right in your world.

What is to be learned in May:

Royal Purple Brick 🧱

“She resists what she clings to.”

The fear of stepping out, of being abused, has grown so great that you no longer need a wall of fear to prevent you from living - a simple brick will do. Which of course symbolizes that what frightens you is much smaller than you imagine. What we resist, we cannot heal. Royal Purple Brick appears when we are resisting something, and may indicate a loss of faith. This is a sign of fear holding you back in some way and preventing you from moving forward. If you are experiencing pain, holding on tighter will only worsen the situation. Fear may also indicate you’re trying to save yourself from a path that will not serve you! Are you following your true passion? Is it divinely guided?

This can also indicate presently using your energy in a self-defeating way. Use your courage to let go of control and allow Spirit to come in and heal you. The promise of Royal Purple Brick is freedom after surrender. In letting go you may feel some discomfort, but you’ll also allow healing in. The fear of something is always greater than the actual event. This time period will be a life changing experience for you. Accept mystery. Release the brick and be free.

Purple may be a lucky color 💜

#Capricorn #monthly tarot reading #may 2024 #astrology #tarot #monthly #Spotify

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whereisnardo · 3 years ago

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Hetalia rated as boyfriends best to worst:

Germany-hes doting, but still serious. A good communicator. His SO lucked out. He’s not good at romance, but he tries. And he gets better. Not to mention he’s incredibly loyal to the one who holds his heart.

Japan: If you ever get to the stage with Kiki, he’s a great partner. Level headed and responsible, though he isn’t to keen on gift giving and will often just get stuff you need.

Prussia: listen once y’all get past his insecurities and build a solid relationship, he is a dream boyfriend. Is prone to feelings of unworthiness though, so he needs a partner that can reassure him.

Lovino: Once you get over the first couple of months, and he finally trusts you, he’s a Perfect Partner™️. He’s doting, romantic, and he can cook!! Anything for his SO! He, like Gil, is prone to insecurity though. So he needs reassurance from his partner.

China: he has plenty of life experience and he’s a great communicator. He’s also down to earth and loyal to his partner. He’s had plenty of time and learned communication is key to successful endeavors. The only downfall is he fails in the romance category. He makes up for it by providing an incredibly healthy and stable environment for his partner.

America: he can be immature and that can take a toll on a partner. But he’s incredibly loyal, and does his best to keep the romance alive. Not all of his plans are well executed, but he always puts in his best effort. He can tend to be clingy, while also not understanding a clingy partner. But once he’s in it, he’s committed. Very doting.

Sweden: he’s upfront and honest, however is also a bit of a cynic. This can make dating him difficult. He’s also not great at talking about his feelings, and doesn’t do well with romance. But he does communicate with his partner well after enough time has passed and he’s settled into the role.

England: more mature than America, but arguably more emotionally constipated. Arthur has a habit of sabotaging his own relationships. And even though he’s in love, he struggles to verbalize his feelings. Often leaving his partner at a loss.

France: He loves to love, and he loves to be loved. He’s a doting partner and full of romance. However his relationships tend to be the flash in a pan type, and he gets bored before inevitably moving on to someone new. It’s fun while it lasts.

Switzerland: he’s just not a great bf okay?? He’s crotchety, and he won’t so much as buy you a chocolate. Not that money is everything but when there isn’t give and take in a relationship it leaves one party feeling used. He also doesn’t make his SO feel particularly wanted.

Italy: He’s charming and sweet but good fkn lord does this man cheat. It’s like lovino got all the loyal genes and Italy was left with all of Grandpa Rome’s hoe genetics. Do not date.

Spain: listen. Tony is a hoe. Baby he’s lying to you, leave that man. You know what Spain rhymes with? Pain. Yeah I said it.

Greece: He’s a lazy hoe. At least Tony puts in some effort and romance.

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villain-sympathizer · 2 years ago

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here it is!! the dumb cringe thing ive been working on instead of my actual college work lmao

i absolutely ADORE these otp form things, they itch that lil adhd scratch in my brain that loves filling out forms for my characters

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[the original blank sheet can be found here!!] the op changed their twitter handle but its still the same source!

some explanations on their dynamics and backstory under the cut!!

SO. God I think about these idiots so damn much, its insane.

First off, their history:

I have my own lil headcanon (and excuse to merge my own bnha universe with the canon one lmao) that U.A has collaborations with other top Heroics schools across the world to have similar Hero Course curriculums. That way they can avoid drastic differences in heroics styles if heroes need to work internationally (for example, instances like in World Heroes Mission).

Because of this, I think U.A used to have exchange programs with specific countries every-other year before their security cracked down on itself. For one semester, hero students from the American branch would come to U.A to learn alongside their respective class level (meaning American "Juniors" would work with Japanese "Second years"), and at the end of the semester, the Japanese branch would then learn in America for the second semester.

This is likely how Dani and Mirai met, as Dani - once she becomes a Pro Hero - enjoys volunteering her time to assist with the local Heroics high school that she used to attend, and thus jumps at the idea of joining in on one of their bi-yearly exchange trips. It also gives her an excuse to visit her father and sister, who live in Deika after her parents' divorce.

It was no doubt when Mirai was All Might's sidekick, and of course would tail him whenever he wished to "check in" on all the "future pros" training at U.A (aka, he misses his high school years sometimes and this event gives him an excuse to drop in).

Taken by Dani's overall cheery, bubbly, and slightly ditzy personality, as well as her ability to put up a rather good spar with All Might himself - still losing, but proving to be a formidable opponent - it was no wonder Mirai decided to strike up conversation with her. Besides, she seemed to be close with other Pro Heroes like Present Mic, Eraserhead, Midnight, and Best Jeanist, so there had to be more to her. As it turns out, she used to be in this program as well, and trained alongside the aforementioned heroes back when they were baby-cheeked rookies in U.A.

Dani totally won him over with her sense of humor, kindness, and overall open disposition. All Might seemed to approve of her too, which would always be the make-or-break reason for Nigheye. They exchange contact info, spend time together whenever Dani was in the country, and hung out together alongside the other Pros.

It was no wonder when Dani's little sister, Adelynn, got into U.A and was accepted into Nighteye's internship program. Every. Year. He'll tell you it's not favoritism, but we all know it is.

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Their lil symbols:

Dani's is a star, because her name is Slavic/Germanic for Morning Star! Her and her siblings have this celestial theme going: Dani is a star, Adelynn is the moon, and Sunna is the sun!

Nighteye's is based off his eye shape when he uses his quirk!

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Checkbox explanations:

[Confesses first / Initiates first kiss:] This is Dani, I would say, only because she's more bold and open when it comes to her feelings or emotions. Sure, Mirai is someone who is bold and speaks his mind too, but I think we can agree this man will never in his life bring up his feelings first unless it's absolutely dire, or prompted by someone else. So of course, Dani's the one to take the initiative, something Mirai notices is a trait both her and Adelynn share.

[Says "I love you" first:] Despite Mirai being emotionally constipated, like stated above, I feel like he's the one to say it and truly, deeply mean it in a romantic, 'I want to be with you forever' kind of way. Dani, having grown up in Western society, is comfortable telling her family and friends that she loves them all the time - it's just instinct to let them know they mean a lot to her! As far as their relationship goes, Dani's said "Love you!" to Mirai plenty of times, but they both know that it's in that platonic close-friends way, at least until they feel the time is right to fully confess their love. And that's what Mirai does, likely letting it slip while seeing Dani off at the airport after one of her visits.

[Big spoon:] Mirai, a majority of the time. I mean look at this gangly-ass mf, he could wrap around Dani like a cocoon if he tried. However, there are rare times when Dani finishes a patrol in the early, early mornings when Mirai is still asleep, and she'll crawl into bed and spoon him instead.

[Worrier:] DANI, NO CONTEST. Blame 'eldest sister' syndrome on this one, having grown up always looking after Adelynn (before she moves away) and then Sunny. It doesn't help that anxiety runs in the family, too. Mirai can worry sometimes, like if Dani's late from a mission or patrol, the typical stuff, but never on the level of Dani's downright separation anxiety. There is the rare chance that Mirai catches a glimpse of something in her future that worries him, and he practically hovers around her constantly, taking away things or restricting her options to try and lessen the chance of disaster, like a mother with her first-born infant.

[Better w/ money:] Mirai. Not that Dani is bad with money, per say, just that she's a bit of a philanthropist when she has the opportunity to be. Hell, nearly all of Adelynn and Sunny's tuitions were paid by Dani's Pro Hero salary, and she still had more than needed for herself left over. Mirai's also clearly a natural-born desk jockey and instinctually takes charge of any budgeting.

[More experienced:] Dani's had more relationship experience in the past, and likely more sexual experience too. Mirai's just never had the time or interest in that stuff, not till he grew attached to the shadow hero. However, after an incident in college, she grew more reserved in her willingness to date/have one night stands, and instead focused on her career and potential relationship with Mirai.

[Wakes up first:] Now this question is all based on perspective, cause the two of them work literally opposite timeframes of each other. Mirai works that typical 7am to 5pm white-collar shift, running his own agency and all. But Dani, due to the nature of her quirk, works from 10pm to about 5 or 6am, the only exception being Thursday nights so that she can volunteer to teach that next Friday. So sure, Mirai gets up first in the traditional sense, but technically it's Dani who wakes up far before him.

[Steals blankets:] DANI LMAO. She inherited the low-circulation that comes with her quirk from her dad, and runs pretty cold in her hands and feet. It's pretty normal for Mirai to wake up with only a corner of the blankets on him yet. He combats this by just gluing himself to Dani when they're sharing a bed, a win-win.

[Speaks more:] Dani again, but only because she tends to be too friendly and strike up conversations and ramble due to obviously undiagnosed ADHD. Think of a mom who just has to talk to every person she knows at the grocery store, regardless of their connection.

[Normally cooks:] In the off-chance they have the time to have dinner at home, it's always Mirai taking the lead. Dani's cooking skills growing up were mixed: her father was a good cook and loved to teach his little girls, but her mother was a bit of a perfectionist and REFUSED to let anyone help with cooking. Since the divorce, Dani's father was never around to teach her as much as he taught Adelynn, so Dani's a bit of a disaster when it comes to cooking. It's hilarious to them both, but she agrees that Mirai takes control in the kitchen. Though, after the raid incident, and Mirai looses an arm, Dani takes it upon herself to learn to cook in order to help out.

[Apologizes first:] Even if she wasn't in the wrong, Dani will always apologize first, at the very least for arguing. Once again it's likely because of her anxiety (and strained home life as a kid), and how she doesn't want to make people mad or upset at her, despite not giving a flying fuck about her reputation or ranking. So for her to apologize first, no matter what, is kind of her way of inadvertently saying "Please don't be mad at me anymore".

[Ticklish:] BOTH, HANDS DOWN. Dani is by no means immune to tickling, Mirai's proven that plenty of times totally not through fetish means. But Mirai himself, however, is just as ticklish, if not more. Dani found this out after taking advantage of his shirtless form one night as a means of revenge, and it was like she found the holy grail of blackmail.

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Their songs:

VOID - By Lil Nas X [[Yes, I know this one is about LNX's experience with being a gay man, and I'm not trying to take away from that! But without that context I feel like it can fit well for these two.]]

God, this song is so raw and emotional to me, I actually cried a few times when I first heard it just cause it's that GOOD when you really think about it.

For the most part, I see it in the perspective of Dani, admitting her feelings of depression and loneliness despite always being cheery and upbeat around others. She's constantly separated from the comfort of her friends and family in Japan, and clearly seeing that as a true "home" to her than her life in America. Each time she visits and leaves, it's almost as if she's 'running away from home'.

"Oh, Blue, I love you too But today, I'm gonna run away from home"

Now this next line is what REALLY defines them, and what I focus on every time I project them into this song:

I find it hard to get Way too hard to live Tell me what you know Now before I go

I see this taking place after Mirai sees his potential death, keeping quiet about it, but is obviously worried or saddened by something. The next time he sees Dani off at the airport after a visit, she tells him he's clearly upset by something deeper than just her departure. When Mirai denies it and assures her nothings wrong, she immediately knows he must have saw something with his quirk, and asks he tell her what it is before she leaves again. Mirai doesn't tell her, but she gets her answer in the form of an international news report and a rather forlorn call from Toshinori.

The second verse I've only just recently thought harder about, and boy, it makes me almost cry sometimes LMAO

Basically, this next part would take place in the canon universe, where Mirai dies, rather than my au where he survives but with many life-changing injuries:

Oh, I weep through the night Can't find a love who loves me the same Or as much as you do [...] See, I'm getting tired of the way I've been living I'd rather die than to live with these feelings [...] It's too many ups and downs on the ride I spent inordinate 'mounts of time Trapped in a lonely, loner life Looking for love where I'm denied

After losing so many people who were close to her, like Oroboro, her father, Mirai, and Midnight - I can see Dani becoming more reckless and careless with her wellbeing, going through times where she doesn't really care if she dies on a mission or during an attack. This of course never happens, and her sisters manage to convince her to seek help for herself. But the pain and the loneliness never really go away, and in fact, grow worse.

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everything i wanted - By Billie Eilish [tw for suicide mentions/eluding to suicide in the song]

This ones a bit of a given if you've heard it before, but of course I'm going to put a different spin on the song's context for the sake of these two:

The song's about Billie's struggle with depression and suicidal thoughts, how the worry of not being enough or the idea of everyone hating her plagued her mind to the point it manifested in her dreams - however, her brother Finneas was always there for her, and was who she went to to discuss her troubling dream.

In terms of Dani and Mirai, this is once again in the perspective of Dani, with Mirai being the one to assure her and provide comfort.

Danica faced a troubling past and even worse present due to her quirk being seen as "malicious" and fearing the public hates her for it, despite being the #3 Pro Hero in America. She's also put under the stress of what likely every Pro Hero goes through, the feeling of needing to save everyone or else people will berate her for not being a 'true hero'.

'Cause everybody wants something from me now And I don't wanna let 'em down

This is even more prevalent after she learns what Adelynn went through in the psychiatric penitentiary and then the "reformatory camp" after a mishap with her quirk, especially since Dani had the ability to take her out from it - had she known what was happening.

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Comedy - By Bo Burnham

This ones much more lighthearted, and can be seen from both perspectives.

Dani originally wanted to be a comedic musician, or at the very least a musician, but unfortunately was coerced into heroics when her school subtly threatened to have her "reformed" if she couldn't learn to control or use her quirk for something "useful" (aka they threatened her to work for the hero commission since her quirk was useful).

After meeting Mirai, who also enjoyed comedy and making others smile and laugh, it was a breath of fresh air for the both of them to find someone who shared their ideals: making people happy, if only for a moment.

Healing the world with comedy Making a literal difference, metaphorically I swore I'd never be back, and now, I'm back on my feet And I'm healing the world with comedy

This line at the very end hits me every time I hear it, because it pretty much sums up Dani's attitude after she thought she'd never be able to make music again when she became a Pro Hero. Thankfully, after sustaining injuries that required weeks or months to heal - numerous times, mind you - Dani realized that she can spend that time working on her original passion: comedic music.

#writing this instead of finishing a midterm due tomorrow lmao #sir nighteye #mirai sasaki #bnha #mha #bnha oc #mha oc #sir nighteye x oc #knighteye #oc knight owl #dames art

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mypoisonedvine · 4 years ago

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Love, Theoretically | Sebastian Stan x reader (chapter 10 - FINALE)

series masterlist

series summary: having lost your husband, sister, and best friend all to the same extramarital affair, you ran away to a secluded villa in the Hungarian countryside to write and get a little time away from the life you’d left behind. you were only looking for peace and perhaps some inspiration for your novel, but instead you found an unlikely connection with the immigrant repairman– even though the two of you don’t speak the same language.

word count: 6k

warnings: implied smut, angst, fluff, romcom tropes, lots of swearing, pregnancy mention/minor breeding kink

note: click the asterisk for a hyperlink to a translation when the time comes

Six months later...

“It’s good!” she beamed, setting down the last chunk of pages and taking off her reading glasses. “Oh man, that ending hurt, but it’s really, really good!”

You leaned back into the plush chair and sighed with relief. “You think so?”

“It’s best-seller material,” she assured. “With some editing, of course. God, I can’t believe you were sitting on this for so long.”

“What are the biggest changes you want to make?” you asked.

“Well, I’m thinking we’ll cut the romantic subplot,” she mentioned in passing, like it was no big deal. “It’s distracting.

“Distracing?” you repeated. “Nia, it’s the story. It’s a romance.”

“I thought it was a thriller,” she frowned.

“A romance disguised as a thriller,” you corrected.

“Listen, I get what you mean, but I didn’t get this—” she tapped the nameplate on her desk: ‘NIA BROWN, HEAD PUBLISHER’ in shiny letters— “for nothing. I know what I’m talking about, and I know what your readers want. Violence, gore, drama!”

“It has all that!” you defended. “But it’s all there to talk about the real love he finds in her!”

“What do you mean ‘real love’?” she pressed flatly.

“I mean…” you pondered. “I mean love where you feel like a version of yourself that you actually like. Love where you feel unjudged, no precedents or caveats or back-up plans. Love that fucking hurts because you never wanted to rely on anything or anybody. Love that lives in silence because you don’t even need words.”

She furrowed her brow. “That… sounds nice, I guess, but I don’t think anybody really has that. Everybody needs a back-up plan. Everybody needs words— a writer should know that.”

“Oh my god. Oh my god,” you groaned, your face falling into your hands. “I’m so fucking stupid. Jesus Christ, I’m a moron.”

“What? What’s going on?”

“I had that! I had that, and I let it go! I’m the dumbest bitch on the fucking face of the Earth.”

“Don’t say that,” she soothed, but you were already standing up.

“No, I need to find him,” you decided as you grabbed your coat and briefcase. “I need to go back and try to fix this. I love him, I’ve never— I didn’t know I could love like that, I didn’t know I could be loved like that… oh my god, I need to find him. It isn’t over.”

“It isn’t over?” she repeated incredulously. “You said Michael signed the papers!”

“It’s not Michael,” you rolled your eyes as you stormed out of the office. “It was never Michael.”

You ran into the first telephone box you could find, slamming the door shut as you searched your purse for the business card that probably wasn't even in there.

After a moment, you gasped with delight when you pulled it from a very bottom pocket and began punching in the number as fast as possible with shivering hands, long-distance charges be damned.

“Hello?” the confused voice on the other end answered.

“Mrs. Alberti, hi— does Sebastian still work for you?” you asked hastily.

“No, dear," she sighed, apparently recognizing you by just your voice (and likely your request), "he quit recently, and moved away.”

“Moved?" you repeated with a wrinkled brow. "Where?!”

“I assume back home, sweetheart; to Bucharest.”

“Shit,” you sighed. “Shit!”

“Are you having your ‘run through the airport’ moment, sweetheart?” she realized.

“Yes, I think so— do you have his address?”

“Well, no, but I’ll see what I can find.”

You waited rather impatiently as she shuffled through papers in the background, mumbling to herself as she apparently searched for information that could help you.

“All I’ve got is the address of a previous employer… a carpenter,” she finally explained, breaking the silence. “It was his only reference when he came to work here," she explained.

"Wow, you really did just hire him for his looks," you blurted out.

"He was desperate for work, that boy had nowhere else to go,” she defended.

“Right, well, I guess if that’s my only lead then I’ve gotta go for it,” you decided. “Thank you, Mrs. Alberti.”

“I told you to call me when that book was a hit. Did it happen yet?” she piped up.

“It’s not published yet,” you explained. “It needs some more work… but I think it’s almost ready.”

“I think so, too, dear.”

Learn Romanian in 10 Weeks! A practical language guide.

Week 1, Day 1: Greetings

Hello Salut

Goodbye La revedere

Thank you Mulțumesc

You’re welcome Cu plăcere

Good morning Bună dimineata

Good afternoon Bună ziua

Good evening Bună seara

Good night Noapte bună

You brushed your hair back out of your face with a sigh, turning the page as you mumbled the phrases to yourself. Broken Hungarian and your high school education in Latin were not getting you as far with this as you had been hoping.

How are you? Ce mai faci

I love you Te iubesc

“Te iubesc, te iubesc, te iubesc,” you repeated over and over in a whisper.

Each day you had a new routine: practice Romanian for an hour, check flight prices online (or call the airline), research what you knew about Sebastian and the address Mrs. Alberti had given you, and then get back to practicing Romanian again.

Oh, and occasionally you worked on the edits Nia wanted for your manuscript. You were focusing on the minor changes— grammar errors, rearranging sentences— and putting off her big request for the removal and replacement of the romantic aspects. More than ever, they seemed like the most important thing the book had to offer.

You had a small apartment, just a place to sleep and shower really; much too small to fit everything you’d already taken from Michael’s house (you know, the one that used to be your house) along with what he’d shipped to you that you forgot before. He included a letter in the package as well. You threw it out, unopened.

Truthfully, you never really fully unpacked. As much as you realized you probably should, in order to really feel like you had a real home, you couldn’t bring yourself to empty your suitcases when you knew you’d be packing them again any day now.

You also realized how outrageous this all was. Ignoring the unlikelihood of even finding him in the first place, Sebastian probably wouldn’t want anything to do with you after you broke his heart, left, and then randomly tracked him down after over half a year. But to be totally transparent, you weren’t really doing this to get him back, necessarily. You knew that was probably never going to happen. You were doing this because you needed to try. You needed to go there, and get hurt, and come back knowing you did everything you could: you’d never be able to live with yourself if you did anything less than that.

You couldn’t start your new life until you had put everything else to bed. And if that meant being 100%, painfully certain that you and Sebastian could never be together, then that was just how it needed to be.

After two weeks of looking, there still weren’t any reasonable flights to Bucharest, so you booked another trip by train, figuring you could use the three day trip to brush up on the key Romanian phrases you were going to need as well as prepare your speech.

Yes, your plan was a speech. You didn’t have a back-up plan. You didn’t even have a return ticket back to London yet.

A passage by Yeats came to mind; But I, being poor, have only my dreams. I have spread my dreams under your feet. Tread softly, because you tread on my dreams.

In all your life, you’d never understood before why someone would want to only have their dreams. But now, here you were… and yes, it felt terrifying and vulnerable and uncomfortably naked, but it felt pretty damn good, too.

With a sigh, you scribbled out the last sentence you’d written, tossing the trash paper aside. You looked up out the window at the scenery flying by in a blur, worried that if you didn’t look out from the train every once in a while you’d get motion sickness.

The sun was beginning to set already, the green of hills and trees tinted orange. You only indulged in it for a moment, though, before getting back to this god-forsaken speech you were deadset on finishing before you arrived in Bucharest tomorrow. At first, you’d figured the translating would be the most difficult part… but writing in English wasn’t exactly a piece of cake, either. You had so much to say, and suddenly so few words for any of it.

You’d probably done more editing on this than any of your novels combined; the crumpled up pages spilling out of your wastebasket were proof enough of that.

“And I’m a fucking writer!” you groaned aloud, to no one in particular. “How is anybody else supposed to be able to do this, if I can’t?”

Other people aren’t as emotionally constipated as you, the voice of your inner critic reminded you plainly, making you roll your eyes at yourself.

A rap at your door made you sit up straighter and turn around. A stewardess slid open the frosted glass slightly to give you a friendly smile. “Is everything alright, ma’am?”

Your brows furrowed at the sound of her accent. “Is that a Romanian accent?” you asked.

“Yes, ma’am,” she nodded.

“So you’re fluent in Romanian and English,” you concluded.

“And Portuguese, yes ma’am,” she agreed.

“Could you come in here for a moment and help me translate something?”

She seemed slightly confused at the request but stepped forward, sliding the door most of the way shut behind her. Leaning beside you on the desk, she picked up your handwritten letter and blinked her wide, brown eyes a few times. You felt slightly embarrassed knowing she was reading such intimate thoughts, but that was how it felt the first time someone read anything you wrote so you were pretty much used to it by now.

“I usually ask the passengers what brings them to Bucharest,” she mumbled after a moment. “This is the most interesting thing so far. Am I reading this correctly, that you intend to confess your love to someone you met—” she scanned the page quickly— “during a vacation in Hungary?”

“Yup,” you smiled awkwardly, popping the ‘p’ at the end of the word.

“And he doesn’t speak English?” she assumed; you nodded. “And… you don’t speak Romanian?”

You nodded again, and she breathed in and out quickly, sitting beside you as she stared at the letter.

“I’ve never seen anything like this before,” she explained.

“Sorry for sucking you into the entropic vortex that is my life,” you chuckled.

“I don’t mean to pry,” she sighed, setting the letter down, and you laughed a little internally at the idea that she was worried about prying when she just read the most personal piece of writing you’d ever put to the page, “but do you think this is… enough? I mean, to build a relationship on?”

You just gave her a shrug. “I have no idea. But, you know, I spent my whole life worrying about stuff like that. I dated my husband for seven years before we got married, because I wanted to be sure. I was initially interested in him because he was successful and ambitious, and it made me feel like this was a really secure relationship that I could rely on. I double majored in English and Computer Science because I wanted a more stable career to fall back on in case being a writer didn’t work out, and even though it did, I’ve spent most of my career publishing what I thought people wanted to read instead of what I wanted to write, so I’d have a better shot at a good paycheck. I grew up thinking the best thing I could ever have was security. And now I’m divorced, watching my royalties shrink every month, more insecure in every way than I’ve ever been, and I’m realizing that the choices I made didn’t give me what I wanted. I gave up so much in the name of safety, and I let the one good thing I’d ever found go, so I could go back to being the same person I always was. I’m ready to settle again, if this doesn’t work… I’m ready to accept that this is just the way life goes, and be thankful that I got a taste of the kind of stuff I thought only existed in the sort of books I’d read but never write.”

She swallowed as she looked at you, and you felt your eyes water as you stared out the window towards the dimming scenery one more time, smiling at the sight of a distant village, a church with a steeple, vineyards and farms. Someone’s whole life is in that little town, you imagined, and they’re just watching your train go by like they see every other day.

“Sebastian gave me more security than I’d ever had before, even though the whole thing was such a ridiculous little whirlwind, and nothing like I ever imagined my life could be. But he made me want to be honest and raw and write sappy letters like the one you just read. He doesn’t have any money, at least as far as I know, and I haven’t known him for seven years, and on paper it makes no sense… but you would understand if you knew him. If you felt that joy that he radiates, if you saw him live his simple little life like it’s the best thing in the world. You would understand if you knew how much I needed this. You would understand if you had been just as miserable being who I’ve been for so long, and finally had a chance to be somebody you think you were maybe meant to be the whole time. So, if I never see him again, I hope I just get to thank him.”

You waited for her to say something, but furrowed your brow at the long moment of silence, looking back from the window finally and finding her staring at you with a tear running down her cheek. When you met her gaze, she quickly wiped it away with a sniffle and looked down at your desk again. “Let’s get to translating, shall we?” she announced with a half-smile.

You noticed the way the other passengers looked at you as everyone was in line to deboard from the train car; you stuck out like a sore thumb, since everybody else was carrying heavy luggage and all you had was a backpack.

In your defense, you really had no idea how to pack for a trip where you knew neither the duration nor the true final destination. So, it was mainly filled with your essentials, a few clothes for any kind of weather, and enough leu to buy anything else you needed along the way.

The stewardess was waving goodbye to everyone as they shuffled out into the train station, occasionally stopping to shake a hand or give directions to nearby destinations. When you were just about to pass by, though, she pulled you into a tight hug.

“Good luck,” she whispered, holding you just a moment too long before pulling back and giving you an encouraging look. “If he doesn’t take you back, feel free to blame my translation… because if he knows what’s in your heart, I know he’ll say yes.”

“Yeah, that’s the hard part isn’t it?” you laughed weakly. “Thank you for your help. I guess if I come back alone for the return trip tonight, you’ll know how bad it went.”

“Then I hope I don’t see you again,” she winked.

It being a major train station and all, cabs were waiting around every corner so it was pretty easy to grab one and give them the address you already had written down for this exact purpose.

“This is pretty far,” the driver explained, “on the edge of town. Not a tourist spot.”

“Good, because I’m not a tourist,” you nodded, already only giving him half your attention as you pulled out the translated speech to practice.

“And you can afford this?” he pressed. You sighed and dug through your bag, pulling out a haphazard stack of bills and handing them through the plastic partition.

“Is this enough?” you asked, and he didn’t answer, just taking the money and starting the car as you smiled and leaned back in your seat.

As much as you had tried to convince yourself to not get your hopes up, the butterflies in your stomach felt more like whole birds at this point, demanding to break free as you practiced the words hand-written on the page over and over again, committing it all to memory.

“What are you reading?” the cab driver asked after several minutes.

“Oh, nothing,” you mumbled, “sorry if I’m bothering you, you can turn on the radio.”

“No, it’s not bothering me, but what you are saying… it’s very odd. It sounds like something from a play, or movie,” he explained.

“Um, it’s not,” you replied, a little embarrassed. “But does it sound like it’s from a good movie? Like, if you heard a character say this to another character, would you think they should get together?”

“I… don’t know,” he answered, sounding confused. “I mean, it depends on what happened, right? How they met, how well they get along…”

So, you told him the whole story, as succinctly as possible (which is not very succinct at all). By the end, he was actually giving commentary as you spoke.

“Why the hell did you leave?” he interjected, clearly irritated with you. “You loved him!”

“Yeah, well, sometimes love isn’t enough! I loved my husband too, and look how that turned out,” you defended.

“But that’s different. That was love for all the wrong reasons.”

“I promise, it felt very real at the time,” you shrugged.

“And now?” he countered. “You realize that this man— Sebastian, right?— is real.”

“I hope I’m right this time,” you offered. “But even if I am, he may not agree.”

The driver scoffed, taking a hand off the wheel to wave dismissively. “If he’s anything like you said, then he will still be completely in love with you. After all, you still feel the same way after all this time apart, don’t you?”

“If anything, I love him more every day,” you admitted, your heart beating quickly just to say it aloud.

“You know, when I met my wife, she was engaged to another man. He was rich, good-looking, and he wasn’t even a bad guy unlike this husband you describe. He was a good man, but he wasn’t right for her. They were… content together, but she wasn’t truly happy. Every night I would come to her window and beg her to marry me, because I knew that she knew we were meant for each other, but she was scared because her family wouldn’t approve and she would be a poor man’s wife.”

“How did you convince her to marry you instead?” you asked eagerly, sucked into the story already.

“I didn’t. On the day of the wedding, some people told me to go and break it up but I didn’t. I thought it would be wrong, to try to ruin her happiness and take it for myself by making a scene at the wedding. I realized she was her own woman and if she wanted to choose him, I had to let her. I had locked myself in my house, not wanting to see anyone that day, and she appeared at my door. I didn’t need to convince her because she knew the truth in her heart, and called off the wedding herself.”

“Wow,” you smiled.

“She was still in her dress!” he recalled with a hearty laugh. “She looked like an angel. We were married just a few days later. And next month will be thirty years,” he added as he lifted his left hand to show the golden band on his finger.

“Thirty years, that’s… a long time,” you sighed.

“It wasn’t always easy,” he admitted. “But it was always worth it.”

Just as you wondered what you could possibly say to that, you felt the car slow down to a stop.

“This is the address you gave me, this is it,” he explained, pointing out his passenger-side window. You leaned up against the glass and gasped in dawning fear as you saw the storefront dark and empty inside.

“No, nonono,” you whispered rapidly to yourself as you swung open the door and hopped out, pressing your face against the glass to try to get a look inside and finding what was undeniably a closed carpentry business. There was a note on the door, taped on the inside of the glass, and you knew enough Romanian to know it said something about a vacation and three months.

“Shit!” you yelped, holding your face in your hands, wondering if your journey had come to an end before it really began.

“Are you alright?” the driver asked, rolling down his window to speak to you.

“This was my only lead, I don’t have his real address,” you explained. “He used to work here, I thought maybe someone would know him…”

He sighed, giving you a sympathetic look. “Get back in, we can search nearby. You came too far to give in yet.”

But getting back in the car felt like giving in, too, which you realized as you looked back at the note taped to the carpenter's door. This was the closest you'd gotten, and it felt wasteful to leave with nothing.

Just as you were ready to hop in the passenger seat and start searching aimlessly through suburban Bucharest, or maybe look around for a Romanian yellow pages, you heard a noise from behind you, across the street; a laugh. His laugh. But it couldn’t be because it was too good to be true… and yet you found yourself whipping your head around and hoping beyond all reason that it was Sebastian.

Across the street was a restaurant, with a large patio where patrons were dining and chatting as they sat at wrought iron tables, and your eyes searched the crowd for any signs of him.

And then your gaze landed on a head of thick brunette hair, red and gold highlights so obvious now when the sunlight hit it this way. Broad shoulders wrapped in a white button-up shirt. He was facing away from you but he was looking to the side so you could see his face; he was smiling, laughing at something someone had said. And it was his smile that you recognized; it was like everything else faded away, and in that moment you thought maybe you could almost be happy with just this, just seeing him be happy even if it had nothing to do with you.

“Sebastian,” you called out to him, but he didn’t react. “Sebastian!”

His whole body turned, his eyes met yours, and you couldn't help but let the tears well in your eyes as you ran across the road to him.

He looked, understandably, stunned, and you realized he was actually waiting on a table at the moment; he said something to them, apparently excusing himself, and stepped closer to you.

But he stopped walking, not coming any closer, not exactly dragging you into his arms like you might've preferred, but with a breath to try to soothe your racing mind, you summoned your memories of the practiced letter and began. *

“Când am venit în Ungaria…” you started slowly, doing your best to remember the words and hoping your pronunciation wasn’t too awful, “nu căutam dragoste. Căutam spațiu, claritate și poate o idee de carte de un milion de dolari. În schimb, am găsit tot ce am căutat toată viața mea…”

You did your best to bite back tears, especially when his expression was nearly unreadable and you had no idea how well this was going.

“Ești tu, Sebastian, bineînțeles că ești tu,” you sighed, laughing slightly. “Ai fost acolo pentru mine când nici nu știam ce vreau de la nimeni. Ai fost prietenul meu fără să spui vreodată un cuvânt - cel puțin nu un cuvânt pe care l-am înțeles. M-ai iubit și nu știam ce să fac cu asta, pentru că uitasem cu mult timp în urmă cum se simțea să fii iubit. Și ce simțeai să iubești cu adevărat pe cineva. Dar te iubesc. Și am fost prost să te las să pleci, atât de neconceput de prost. Vreau să fim noi, Sebastian. Lasă-mă să te iubesc, mai dă-mi o șansă și îți promit că nu te voi mai lăsa să pleci niciodată.

The first thing he said was your name, and just the way he said it made you fall in love with him all over again.

“I… I dream that you would come back,” he shakily replied. “But now I cannot believe. You are my dream.”

Tears were openly flowing at this point and you wanted to run into his arms, but you tried to stay calm and hear him out. He stepped closer, almost hesitant, like you would run away if he got too close too fast.

“I love you, very much that I am sure I am insane person,” he explained with a grin, and you giggled. “We will live anywhere, do anything you would like— be my wife.”

You gasped as he pulled you into him, gripping your arms tightly as his desperation became apparent.

“Marry me?” he asked softly.

“Da,” you nodded, “yes, of course, anything—”

He kissed you suddenly, but gently, and it said more than any words in any language could.

It was a small wedding, in the Hungarian countryside by the lake. You could remember diving into that lake for lost pages of your manuscript; you could remember looking out over the water and dreaming of this moment you were living right now, thinking it was impossible.

He didn’t have much family, but they welcomed you with open arms.

Your family, well, they were too busy with planning another wedding, for your ex-husband and your ex-sister. A few of them sent cards but the rest were suspiciously quiet. You honestly didn’t even notice… you had a new family to attend to, anyhow. And it wasn’t like you didn’t have any guests, since you were able to track down and invite a stewardess named Maria, and a cab driver named Andrei and his wife, Paola.

Sebastian’s cousins weaved flowers into your hair and his grandmother tailored her dress to fit you like a glove. A picture of his parents was hung nearby in tribute; he told you they would’ve wanted to see him get married but that he felt, in some way, they were able to even if they had passed away quite some time ago.

You realized you’d never seen him in anything even mildly formal before; in fact, the suit he wore was rather casual, all things considered, but he looked so painfully cute in it. Sometimes you thought he actually looked a bit out of place wearing a shirt, though, especially one that was buttoned up all the way.

Luckily, the shirt was halfway unbuttoned about ten minutes into the reception.

Mrs. Alberti cooked a massive dinner for everyone, and even grew the flowers that you carried down the cobblestone aisle.

And wow, can Romanians drink. You had to be careful not to try to keep up with them, because if you had you would’ve been blacked out halfway into the night and the last thing you wanted was to forget even a moment of this.

As the night started to wind down to a close, you and your new husband retired to the lakehouse, running up the stairs and finding them as creaky as always.

He wrapped his arms around you in the hall and kissed you eagerly as you stumbled back into the bedroom, tripping over the doorway and falling onto the bed together.

It felt so right to have his weight on top of you, to feel his smile against your lips, to wrap your arms around his neck.

“This room,” he mumbled into the kiss. “Do you remember first time?”

“Yes,” you nodded, “da, I remember, how could I forget?”

He grinned and moved his lips down to your neck. "I thought of you every day… I love you,” he whispered.

“Te iubesc,” you whispered back.

It was almost like the first time in so many ways: passionate, yet oddly hesitant as you rediscovered each other. It was comfortable, though… you couldn’t think of any other person you felt so comfortable with, somebody who finally got you out of your own head and who made you want to experience everything life had to offer.

You were sure you’d never gone so long without worrying about something in all your life.

“My wife,” he whispered against your skin. “This is all I had wanted… from seeing you in very beginning.”

“You’re all I ever wanted,” you sighed in return, “ești tot ce mi-am dorit vreodată, Sebastian.”

Life with Sebastian was beautifully simple. You spent most of the day writing, usually, while he built furniture to sell and occasionally gardened with his spare time. You could always tell how busy you’d been with a new novel lately by how perfectly groomed the hydrangea bushes were.

You’d told him once that you’d come to Hungary looking for a million-dollar book idea. A Killer in Disguise performed alright, but not anywhere near that. The Language of Love, on the other hand, was definitely a million-dollar idea… about eleven times over. Sebastian didn’t seem to worry too much about how much money you made, though; he was just proud to say that he was the inspiration for your hit novel. You secretly suspected that he was more proud of your work reaching enough international notoriety to be translated into Romanian.

His English still needed some work, but you found it endearing. He was determined to get better and spent at least a half-hour each day practicing, but you hoped he wouldn’t get too perfect because you would miss the silly little mistakes he made. At least you could be sure he’d keep the accent forever… damn, that accent; and he knew exactly what it did to you, too.

In fact, you were crossing through the hall in your robe one evening when your husband’s voice stopped you.

“Darling wife,” you heard Sebastian call from the bedroom in a playful sing-song.

“What is it, Seba?” you asked with a smirk.

“Come in here, please…”

You opened the bedroom door to find most of the room covered in rose petals: most of all the bed, which was surrounded by candles, and topped with a shirtless (as per usual) Sebastian, laid on his side seductively with a long-stemmed rose (one you recognized from his very own garden) between his teeth.

“What are you doing?” you laughed. “Is this some sort of special occasion I’ve forgotten?”

You were already searching your mind for what it could be, but your two-year anniversary had passed a few months ago already and since it was spring it couldn’t be the anniversary of when you first met since that was late in the summer.

“Iss not quite a thpecial occathion yeth,” he answered before taking the rose from his mouth so he actually made sense. “I was considering it could be a special occasion, when we’re done…”

You smirked and climbed over the candles and into bed with him, taking the opportunity to run your hands over his chest. “And what occasion would that be?”

“A year from now, it could be the anniversary of when our child was conceived,” he answered.

Your breath caught in your throat, your voice reduced to a whisper of surprise. “Seba—”

“If you’re not ready, I will be understand,” he instantly added, stern yet soft. “Only if you want this, I just thought that maybe—”

You silenced him with a kiss, lacing your fingers into his hair and letting him roll you onto your back. He pulled back just enough to let you answer, but your noses were still bumping into each other and you smiled.

“I’m ready, Sebastian. More than ready,” you whispered.

He grinned and kissed you again, deeper and slower as he held your face with one hand and gripped your waist with the other. As his lips trailed down to your neck, you were interrupted with one pressing thought.

“Can I ask you something?”

He popped up and looked down at you with a smile. “Sure!”

“Why are you wearing ratty old jeans?” you laughed.

“Hey, these worked on you the first time,” he defended.

You gasped. “You don’t mean those are the jeans—”

“Yes,” he nodded, “the jeans that I had been wearing when I was working on Mrs. Alberti’s cottage. And, truly, when I was finding an excuse to work outside your window.”

“Wait,” you sat up, “did you actually work outside my window on purpose?”

He laughed, hanging his head quickly before looking back at you again with a sparkle in his eye. “You are very smart, my love, except for those times when you are— how do you say? Oblivious.”

You chuckled, unfortunately very aware that he was right.

“Didn’t you ever wonder why I was building a window frame, nearly a dozen metres away from the window it was for?”

You thought for a moment before dropping your face into your hands and laughing. “No, I didn’t notice that. I was too busy giving you a thorough eye-fuck,” you recalled.

“Yes, because I was not wearing a shirt and this distracted you,” he pondered, sounding suddenly like a scientist explaining a theorem or something. “See, that’s the beauty of wearing the jeans and no shirt. The body distracts you while the jeans seduce you.”

“How about you take the jeans off and put that body on me, capisce?” you pleaded; not that you didn’t love his humor or anything, but maybe his funny bone wasn’t exactly the bone you were interested in at the moment.

He grinned devilishly and suddenly pulled your legs apart, settling his body between them as he kissed your neck again, nipping at your jawline and ear. “You’re being impatient, dragă,” he purred. “You want to have my baby that badly?”

You whined involuntarily, arching your back as his hands roamed your body and finally began to untie your robe and push the silk out of the way. “Yes, Sebastian, please—”

“Let’s just say, theoretically, I wanted to have more than one? Would you have another of my children?” he asked softly as he reached up and palmed at your breasts, teasing your nipples which were already much too hard and sensitive for how little he’d touched you. The rough denim rubbing against the inside of your thighs was oddly arousing— maybe it was the sensation itself, or maybe it was just that this was almost like the first thing you imagined when you saw Sebastian all those years ago.

“Yes,” you moaned out your answer, “yes, you know I’d do anything for you.”

“What if I wanted a big family?” he pressed. “Really big? Like, Catholic big?”

“We can have our own fuckin’ Brady Bunch, Seb, I just need you right now,” you begged, grabbing the back of his neck and pulling him into a hot and desperate kiss.

He decided to wait until afterwards to ask what a ‘Brady Bunch’ was. You decided to wait until afterwards to ask when he’d learned how to use the word ‘theoretically’.

sfarsit; the end

#sebastian stan x reader

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ophiuchus-interactive · 3 years ago

Note

Bringing it back to neutral! But boy were those spicies quite hot and tasty. I was wondering: what is something that mc could do that would make the ROs melt? Just pure heart eyes, remind them how hopelessly crushing/in love they are with them!

Under the cut!

Valerian: Laugh at his jokes. It sounds silly and almost vain, but it's true- there's nothing more simple and sweet to him than someone who he has a crush on, laughing along with him at his silly jokes. He'll positively radiate with the power of a thousand suns, it makes him so happy.

Peter: Help with making dinner. Food is a very personal thing for Peter, so joining in (rather keeping him company while HE makes the food, lol) on helping him make food for the crew is something that he'd positively melt seeing.

Rosalie: Standing up for what you believe it. It sounds vague, but being someone who is willing to voice their opinion and will say it on no uncertain terms is something that makes Rosalie's heart fly out of her chest. Rosalie had never had that sorta gumption in her, and so to see it in another person...woof.

Ophelia: Your friendships/other interactions with the crew members. Ophelia, not unlike Sergio, will try her best to ignore the feelings she has for you, and will actively push them down. She prefers to sort of...get that attention via osmosis, and is touched by how well you may get along with Valerian or Thane or whomever it may be. You've made a place for yourself within this crew, and that's something that she founds very...romantic, in a way.

Javier: Similar to Valerian, Javier's heart will explode if you laugh at his jokes or his flirting. His heart will explode at the sound, and it only makes him want to come up with more stupid, silly jokes and pick up lines in hopes that maybe one day, you'll play along ;)

Sergio: The way you fight. It's probably the only way he'd allow himself to actively interact with you once he realizes his own feelings for you. The man is terribly, terribly emotionally constipated and thinks he cannot love you. So he'll just watch you tear through enemies like they were nothing- you're so sure about yourself, how could he not love that?

Thane: Being patient with him. His a snippy kinda guy, and he knows it. Thane might not always say the right thing, and the regret will eat him up on the inside because of it. For someone to take that in stride, particularly with him, almost forces Thane to put his own self-image into perspective, and for that you make his knees weak.

Hope: Experiencing new things with them. Hope has a lot to learn, and often feels like they're flailing hopelessly about for something to grasp onto and hold- it's all so weird, so alien to them. If the MC were to try something out for the first time with Hope, it almost makes Hope feel like they're less alone in all of this. It's a comforting feeling- and a beautiful thing for Hope to watch.

Hawkeye: Snap back at them. It's antagonistic and crude, but there's something about being put in their place that makes Hawkeye relax, in a strange way. Hawkeye has had to look after themself for so long they forgot what it was like to really have people watching what they say and do- and get grumpy about it! It's cute, it's delightful, and...warm, all at once.

#ros asks #anon asks #fluff #fluff asks

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shinebrightlikeanarwhal · 3 years ago

Text

Random SF ideas

It has a lot of Travis ships because that's my feral lil bby. I'm having fun keeping him from bullying people by bullying him instead lol

Every time he enters school Sal mutters “anything can happen in the Bronx”. Todd is the only one that doesn’t understand.

Travis is emotionally constipated and will take it out on others, but later do small things as his form of apologizing. Philip and his mother are the only people that understand him and understand why. Sal thinks he may be bipolar and Larry has probably called him the r-slur under his breath. (Stinky boy probably would say it openly if not for Sal's disdain for that word).

Maple and Travis bonding over jewelry and make up. Travis won’t admit it to anyone but her but he likes the way Maple accessorizes. Obligatory Chug appreciation to keep on her good side, later forms a healthy and wholesome friendship.

Travis and Larry fight verbally. It doesn’t get physical unless Larry loses control and shoved Travis. This prompting a snarky reminder that Larry is no better than Travis’ own father. They cuddle and fall asleep later tho, after Sal puts them in their get along corner.

Nicknames. Travis’ weakness is nicknames. Lisa discovers this and shows Larry and Sal who abuse this power. Travis’ tan cheeks are bright red anytime he’s out public with them because of their stupidly sweet nicknames. Their go to for reactions are baby(boy), sweetheart and bottom

Shameless PDA when Sal is jealous. Travis learns the hard way how easy it is to make him jealous when a hand is in his waist and holding him close to the shorter. Fingers tracing any exposed skin to keep Travis focused on him. Sorry Lar, you took up too much Travis time..

Travis’ mom being an absolute babe. Apple if her eye is her sweet boy. Probably passed while he was young and had to watch him grow in that unhealthy environment.. maybe reaches out to Sal for help since he’s more intuitive. Def terrifies Larry a couple times as a prank. He hit her son, bully or not, it just felt right to braid his hair to his bed post a couple times and paint his nasty thoughts on his chest.

Travis hates surprises and loud noises because of his father. They don’t learn that until they throw a surprise birthday party with cheering and loud pops of confetti balloons, his panic attack damn near gave him a heart attack. (He refused to accept apologies for something they didn’t know. Instead demanding they spoil him for the rest of the week as compensation for his hospital trip on his birthday)

I said it once, and I’ll say it again. Service. Animals. Mr. Phelps legally obligated to give him a service animal and Travis is somewhat saved from Kenneth's abuse. Taking more time outside for walks (the dog can’t bare letting Travis stay in the house for long with his father home). He genuinely bonds with other students over his new dog (the dog allowing contact when not in uniform but if Travis’ needs are present will attach itself to Travis’ hip.

Religious trauma and coping. Because PLS, can we please address the amount of abuse because of the Bible?? That boy may stay and follow the proper words of his lord. Or he could detach himself from the church entirely (especially because of the cult!)

Travis ships: Salvis and Larvis

Asked out: Oh. Oh no. How did they fall for Travis?!? What did they do to find that feral little kitten so cute?? Was it they dyed hair? The dresses when he shows off more legs than they anticipated? Him apologizing and changing for the better?? What happened to him to make him so interesting!? Sal absolutely starts approaching Travis cautiously. Taken aback when he's greeted with a warm smile and compliments. They start to grow as friends and spend time together often. Sharing eachother with their friend groups and on their own. It takes a couple of years before Sal nervously asks Travis if he would be interested in getting closer. Travis doesn't understand and Sal just awkwardly blurts out if he would try dating him... for an experiment or anything. Travis is excited, he wants to be closer and happily hugs onto Sal as his answer.

Larry is a lot ore aggressive. Cornering Travis and glaring down at him. Demanding to know what his game is. Travis doesn't fight he just nervously asks if Larry hates him. Larry almost says he does but gets distracted by the trembling and cowering kitten before him. Fuck, he can't possibly hate Travis. Larry instead starts approaching Travis. At first Travis is afraid that Larry will hit him if he doesn't like something he does. Larry hates to admit it, but Travis infested his mind. Dreams were no longer sacred when teenage hormones and a new love interest were involved. Many a times he had to look away when Travis were a particular skirt or dress because his dreams seemed to run rampant with those items. When they finally talk, Travis initiates it. He Pushes Larry into a bathroom stall and demands he explain himself. He's staring at him like a piece of meat and following him around. Larry is scaring HIS friends. Larry doesn't even hesitate to pounce on Travis. Mouth to mouth and hands on ass. Travis surprised but kinda into it allows the kiss until Larry gets too handsy. He returns to his friends with an angry red hand print on his cheek. It takes a month of apologizing Travis finally agrees to give Larry a chance. (Larry tells his mom and dances around the apartment that night)

First kiss failures: Larry got too into the kiss and starts feeling up the poor boy. Sal pecks him in his sleep and never tells Travis. He just happily holds the memory of kissing his sleeping princess.

First dates: Larry tries to show Travis the fun things to do in this sleepy little town. Travis is excited just to go anywhere other than church and school. At first there are a few hiccups, maybe weather, maybe places are crowded or cancelled. But it still ends well with the boys passed out in the truck, snuggled under a blanket Larry stores with a big smile on their face. Sal is much more romantic. Candles and flowers. Dresses up nice and styles his hair in a neat bun. He wants to impress Travis and assert he can be the man for him by presenting more masculine (Travis snorts and tells him even in a dress Sal could fight a bear). Its a simple dinner at home with Gizmo as their lazy server, sleeping on the couch in a little suit. The night ends well with the boys enjoying a night stroll and admiring the calm and almost desolate surroundings of Nockfell.

First Times: Sal does NOT expect Travis to offer it. In fact, he almost shattered his favorite mug with the tight grip he put on it. Travis thinks this means Sal doesn't want him, but no nono, Sal wants it/ He wants Travis bad. That simp wastes no time scurrying to their room, cleaning his bed and all necessary items are prepared. He was well stocked for... college purposes, but Travis offering to give Sal his first?? (Yes. He did a victory dance and scream in the tree house when he thought he was alone.)

First Time: Larry would waste no time, grabbing Travis and making sure, this is what he wants. Larry may sleep around before they got together but he would never expect Travis to offer his first time so soon. Travis agreeing and Larry in tears hugging onto the confused man. He has never been so gentle with a partner and savored every second, sound and action. It may not have been Larry's first but he was more than happy to say it was his best. Larry would 100% scream to Sal about it later though. He is a man that appreciates his partner and would be an aftercare fiend. Relishing in any reactions Travis gives him while massages and treats the poor tired bum.

Living together: Hell hath no fury like Travis on cleaning day. The boys no not to be in his way if he has his cleaning apron and swiffer. The only one allowed to interrupt his most sacred day is Gizmo and any animals they adopt. Larry has to moderate his metal music or sleep on the porch, he tried to test Travis and found the porch uncomfortable during a rainstorm. No ghost hunting after 11pm. If you even think Travis will allow you in the house after hunting ghosts he will promptly pack your bags and ship them off to your parents. Sal has his own room dedicated entirely to clothes and accessories. His prosthetics he tries to hide at first but after a harsh scolding from Travis (while he literally hand cleans every single prosthetic so Sal doesn't get an infection) Sal starts putting them away where he feels comfortable and clean. They don't expect Travis to be semi nude half the time. Especially before they marry and start a family, no pants. Never wearing pants. Larry hams up the free skin. Sal is too embarrassed of his sinful thoughts.

Proposals: Travis would be terrified of marriage after what happened to his mother. If they were to propose they ould make sure he is fully comfortable and settled in their new life. They would make sure he is loved and never feels any of the fear his father had instilled in him. Larry mentions marriage in passing to gauge his reaction. Ig Travis tenses, he kills the conversation and instead distracts Travis. If Travis reacts positively he would sneak a ring on his finger and just smirk until Travis realizes and smiles. Sal =, however, is sneaky. Keeping close tabs on Travis. If Travis starts showing signs of interest, he would 100% plan the biggest proposal for Travis and make sure he feels cherished during every moment.

#travis phelps #larry johnson #larry x travis #sal fisher #sal x travis #salvis #larvis #laravis #sally face au #sally face #Travis having the absolute power over his simps #Lisa would be surprised Larrys boyfriend is the Phelps boy she saw on the news

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cto10121 · 3 years ago

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Does R&J Play With Gender Stereotypes?

So I came across this piece of meta by @hamliet that rather intrigued me:

There’s also another layer here: the imagery Romeo uses for Juliet (the sun) and that Juliet uses for Romeo (the moon) is the inverse of how imagery was typically presented in those days. The moon was feminine; the sun, masculine. Even if we look at Romeo and Juliet’s respective character traits, Romeo is the flighty, impulsive, love-struck one who cries all the time, while Juliet is the decisive, bold, and loyal one. That’s the first thing Juliet declares to Romeo in the balcony scene: that she will always be loyal, and she shows this in every choice she makes in the story.

Let’s break this down.

“the imagery Romeo uses for Juliet (the sun) and that Juliet uses for Romeo (the moon) is the inverse of how imagery was typically presented in those days. The moon was feminine; the sun, masculine.”

Romeo does indeed call Juliet the sun, but Juliet never calls Romeo the moon—or likens him with anything symbolically feminine, come to think of it. The closest she or the play gets is a small but clear association with night: Romeo has “night’s cloak to hide me from their eyes” and Juliet implores “loving, black-browed” night to give her her Romeo. Even then it is so that he can “make the face of heaven so fine / That all the world will be in love with night / And pay no worship to the garish sun.”

Instead, Juliet consistently uses the same love language of authority as Romeo does with her, calling him her lord, husband, knight, “day-in-night,” “mansion of a love,” “god of my idolatry,” and, (my particular favorite), “tassel-gentle” or “falcon.” “Pilgrim” is the lowest social rank she uses, but of course she is following Romeo’s pilgrim-and-saints flirtation and its wink-wink bilingual allusion to his name. Romeo’s use of “sun,” then, could be viewed in the context of both lovers conferring cosmic/earthly authority, beauty, ownership, and sovereignty to each other—the Elizabethan equivalent of calling each other wife/husband. And of course they begin doing that immediately after they marry.

Even if we look at Romeo and Juliet’s respective character traits, Romeo is the flighty, impulsive, love-struck one who cries all the time, while Juliet is the decisive, bold, and loyal one.

Definitely not. Romeo is plenty decisive and bold—making the first move in wooing Juliet, climbing the orchard wall, showing himself to Juliet, immediately agreeing to marry her, nearly killing himself when he thinks Juliet might not take him back and, er, actually killing himself for her. I wouldn’t say he is impulsive, either—though he makes decisions fairly quickly, it is almost always with some deliberation beforehand (“Can I go forward when my heart is here?” “Shall I hear more or shall I speak at this?” and his monologue after Mercutio’s exit) and of course there are instances in which he restrains himself (“I am too bold” and his monologue after Mercutio’s death). The most accurate description of Romeo is that he is a risk taker—at least when he is well and truly motivated. And even then it does not rob his deliberation or even his wits.

He is also not flighty. In fact, he proves just as loyal as Juliet—as soon as he meets her, he forgets about Rosaline and leaves her clear behind. He doesn’t once waver in his conviction that Juliet is for him and makes plans to die with her (and does!). His love for Rosaline is clearly framed by the narrative as shallow, performative, and passive, and the verse bears this out. He was never in any kind of relationship with Rosaline—his love was an unrequited crush that he was at perfectly liberty to have ditched, frankly. After that, it’s Juliet, Juliet, Juliet until he dies.

Also, once more, Romeo is no crybaby. He explicitly cries a total of two times—one even before the events of the play, when he pines over Rosaline under a grove of sycamore, and another when he’s 1) seen Mercutio get mortally wounded, 2) killed Tybalt, 3) learned that he is banished from the city, and 4) mistakenly believed that Juliet no longer wants him (the Nurse’s reply is vague enough to be misinterpreted); at the very least he is devastated to have been the cause of her pain. Anyone would break down in those circumstances. Juliet herself breaks down on hearing the news and arguably is more verbally vehement than Romeo—namely, that even the words “Romeo is banishèd” are worse than if herself, Romeo, her parents, and Tybalt were dead. She ends that monologue with a passive suicide threat: “And Death, not Romeo, take my maidenhead!” How anyone can argue Juliet isn’t as lovestruck as Romeo is beyond me.

What Shakespeare was most likely aiming for was showing the mutuality of R&J’s love with parallel scenes and even language. Both have chances to act strong, decisive, and bold, both show vulnerability and great emotion and passion, both are lovestruck. Both demonstrate so-called “masculine” and “feminine” traits, which is almost always culturally-and time-based, anyway. There are only a few key differences between the two—almost all of the above traits, however, they both share. It’s almost as if…Shakespeare understood that no man or woman had all masculine or all feminine traits.

Moving on to the conclusion:

In other words, Shakespeare was deliberately playing with gender and its stereotypes in the play, which gains an even more interesting layer to it when you consider that Shakespeare was himself almost certainly bisexual (his sonnets are preeeetty explicit). It’s not a patriarchal narrative; it can well be seen as a queer narrative in a patriarchal society. And it shouldn’t take two kids having to kill themselves to get society to realize how effed up it is. It isn’t an out-of-touch play, but instead one extremely relevant to our society 500+ years later.

You just opened up 200+ years of fandom wank, OP. I’ll just do a quick sum-up.

The Sonnets are a complete mess. They are contradictory as hell, there is clearly more than one persona speaking, there is evidence that Shakespeare edited and revised them, evidence they were published with his permission, quite a few sonnets are based on pre-existing sources, and, most damnably of all, none of the most likely candidates for the so-called Fair Youth and Dark Lady fit the narrative of the Sonnets perfectly or even satisfactorily—if there is even a clear narrative to these things to begin with. Sonnets were artificial works whose clichés and conventions were heavily satirized in Shakespeare’s own works—Berowne’s own rant-y sonnet swearing he would never believe in love sonnets comes most readily to mind. They were usually not meant to denote an actual real-life relationship, although there was a kind of “game” in trying to figure out which parts are true and which ones fiction. At least one sonnet sequence had a completely fictional addressee (Fulke Greville, I think).

Shakespeare’s sonnets do break a lot of these rules and conventions, and radically, and as they seem to have been compiled over many years, they lend themselves to autobiographical speculation. But, as a bit of a poet myself, I feel this: No one writes 154 sonnets—plus a whole narrative poem!—to one lover or even multiple lovers. Poetry is much less personal than laypeople think. Outside the sonnets, Shakespeare is not linked to any man romantically, and, besides his wife, only to two women (unnamed citizen’s wife and Jane Devanant).

Even if we assume Shakespeare’s bi, though, that doesn’t mean R&J is a queer narrative, which brings us to…

It’s not a patriarchal narrative; it can well be seen as a queer narrative in a patriarchal society.

A queer narrative that has its lovers express their love through the language of heterosexual marriage (husband, lord, wife, lady, pilgrim/saint), and commit suicide by a chalice-and-blade symbolism that mimics heterosexual sex (Romeo drinking a “cup” of poison and Juliet stabbing herself with Romeo’s dagger. Freud couldn’t have done it better). If Shakespeare was thinking “gay allegory!!!” he would have had to at least change or erase the symbolism (straight coding?) of the double suicide, or have Juliet attribute to Romeo explicitly feminine imagery. He would have to have done some major plot rejiggering. He would have had to, in short, change the whole story.

(Unless by “queer narrative” you mean “anything that has an emotionally constipated male lead who doesn’t growl sexily and a female lead who doesn’t cry/faint at the drop of a hat.” That’d be most every narrative, lol.)

Also, I’m hard-pressed to think of love romances that are 100% patriarchal narratives, and those that do (Casablanca, maybe?) are not really true ones, anyway. Patriarchy inherently opposes all romances of love and sex, including heterosexual. It demands that men be raised as soldiers to kill enemies, slaughtered, and discarded, and women as chattel and land to be bought and sold. Marriage was that transferral of property. Having children is necessary, not out of love and care for them, but to propagate the species and create even more future warriors and womb incubators. It grudgingly accepts only (mostly straight and like maybe 1 or 2 gay) love narratives that can be subsumed into this narrow paradigm, but the tension of interpretation is always present. Ideally, it prefers to ignore, diminish, scorn and mock, or even suppress them. I suspect most people’s problems and discomfort with R&J stem from this pathology, this deep-seated unease over anything that touches on human experience patriarchy can’t quite control or subsume.

Shakespeare was obviously no lover of patriarchy (in his personal life, though…well, it’s debatable). His plays resist it greatly to various degrees, and R&J is no exception. R&J hews much closer to the reality of heterosexual love and love in general, which are informed by, though are not inherently tied to, patriarchy (as are gay relationships, sadly). Shakespeare is just being a good writer in throwing most of that rotten apple away; it doesn’t apply to what he was trying to do, anyway. R&J’s challenge to patriarchy, though, is heterosexual in nature.

And it shouldn’t take two kids having to kill themselves to get society to realize how effed up it is. It isn’t an out-of-touch play, but instead one extremely relevant to our society 500+ years later.

True dat.

#romeo and juliet #shakespeare #cristina metas #rj meta #r&j meta #rj are just so boyxgirl op #accept it and you will find peace #repressive traditional gender roles are back in fashion it seems #the victorians couldn’t accept romeo as a man either and had him be played by an actress #but if we’re going to take our notions of gender from the victorians of all people well…

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nyctolovian · 4 years ago

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this ship will carry our bodies safe to shore

This was written for @tma-safehouse-fest day 3-5 prompt (pining). But its sorta a dedication to the way the romance is written cos jon and martin legit try so hard to make things work :’ Please enjoy it!!

Summary: A study of Jon's love for Martin and why he kept it. (set in S4)

link to AO3

Jon knew exactly what this was—pining. Very useless and painful pining.

He was surprised by how quickly he recognised it. Less emotionally constipated people have taken longer to notice their romantic feelings for another. It was all rather strange and hilarious, if you asked him. (But he’d heard plenty of people criticise his sense of humour so he suggested you take this opinion with a pinch of salt.)

During the first few months in the hospital, despite his coma, he heard Martin—sensed him even. He noticed Martin not in words, though Jon knew he was being spoken to, but in presence and genuineness. And he came often, and would always be exuding tender care. Then, his presence began to dwindle with each passing visit, before it dropped off altogether.

Jon didn't (or couldn't, given his unconscious state) think much of it. Then, while asking Basira about what happened in the Unknowing, he was abruptly reminded of him—Martin, where was he? How was he?

Then, came the first thing he would Know after becoming an Avatar. Jon was overwhelmed with the somehow already deep-seated knowledge that he had feelings for Martin, something that had apparently been left brewing like wine in his chest during his Not-Death.

Almost immediately after he came to this realisation however, he was also struck with the fact that he hadn't been visiting lately. Not within the last month. Suddenly, cold dread that Martin didn't care about Jon anymore thrummed in his chest. Had their affections missed each other? Like two fleeting trains on opposite sides glancing off one another?

No, Jon was to learn that it was much worse. Martin was working for the Lonely.

Jon's chest tightened with worry at the thought. What was he doing? Didn't he know working for any of the Fears was bad news? Jon didn't want Martin to be put in danger like this. He didn't want Martin to become… like him, whatever that meant—not human, trying hard to be not-monster…

The dread expanded in his chest when he finally saw Martin. The sheer relief he had felt when he first set his eyes upon Martin could easily set him afloat. He had lost a little weight and grown slightly pale, but he was still alive and well nonetheless, cupping a mug of tea and wearing his usual large faded sweaters.

Jon, on the other hand, must have looked awful with his coma-induced haggardness and messy bun.

When Jon called out to Martin, a look of shock passed over his face at the sight of the man. His eyes darted down to Jon's outfit.

Self-consciously, Jon fiddled with the sides of his ankle-length skirt. His usual clothes had been more or less destroyed by his numerous kidnappings and near-deaths so he had to get new ones. He had made the decision to ditch professionalism entirely and gone for 100% comfort as a petty rebellion against the institution he was trapped within. Unfortunately, his outfits of choice resembled that of a little old Grandma, he belatedly realised.

When he glanced back up nervously, Martin's initial shock was already plastered over with composure. Cheekily, however, the Eye had let Jon Know that Martin's glances were rather appreciative ones and that sent his heart fluttering uselessly.

This short interaction replayed in Jon's mind for days and days, and he found himself drenching in mortification. Every interaction after that too. He would find himself thinking back to it and regretting his every word and twitch. (Not seeking Martin though. He never regretted seeking him.) And after the first sting of embarrassment subsided, he was left with the gentle aftertaste of his pining. To be frank, it was a bitter thing, as expected of something left brewing as long as it had.

He often found himself lying in bed, bolster held tightly against his chest, imagining Martin in his arms. And he'd feel a pang of pain. One that could only be relieved by the warmth of another.

Pining was not something Jon was familiar with. He was not the type to develop crushes to begin with. On the off chance he did, however, he had always been quick to stamp out the first flames of affection, with Georgie as the only other exception. Thus, the pain of yearning for someone you could only watch and think about from afar was incredibly foreign to Jon.

It was pathetic. It was embarrassing. It was unbearable.

But he cradled it in his palms, gently cherishing, refusing to let drop. Anyone who so much as implied that this feeling was something he couldn’t help would be dead wrong.

Jon chose Martin.

He had decided for himself—vowed it to whatever sick god that was watching him—that he was going to love Martin. He found the nascent affection growing in his chest and chose to keep it, let it bloom, chose to foster it even. He saw the red string of fate on his pinky and stubbornly wound it around his wrist, twice, thrice, over and over, tethering himself to this stupid love against all rationality.

He wasn't letting go.

He wasn't letting go of Martin.

Because everyone seemed to think he was gone, lost to doing the Lonely’s bidding. Not Jon. When Martin reassured him that he was doing everything for their sake, to protect them, Jon wholeheartedly believed those words. Martin wouldn’t do anything to hurt them. He didn’t just Know this; Jon trusted him.

But if Martin kept giving and giving, what would be left of him by the end? Surely somebody had to give something back. Jon couldn’t just watch him wither away into nothingness under the aegis of the Lonely.

Who was going to pull Martin out of the Lonely when it's time for him to return? (Surely he would come back. He'd come back when this was all over. He had to.)

Jon knew it had to be himself. Because Jon loved Martin, and loving him was the most natural thing to do. And, by god, Jon was fighting tooth and nail till his body fell apart to protect this.

If he had to die to keep his love, he would.

***

“Uh,” Martin muttered. “Jon, I, uh, I appreciate this but um…”

Jon looked down at their interlocked hands, not quite registering.

“I have to open the door.”

“Oh.” Jon’s face heated. “Oh. Yes, of course.” Reluctantly, he released Martin’s right hand, shivering as he did so. This was the first brush of cool air against his now-sweaty palms in hours.

He hadn’t noticed how long they had their hands linked like this. They must have been holding hands since their reunion inside the Lonely’s realm. He had been so petrified of losing Martin again that he had clasped his hand in an almost-death grip while he navigated through the mists and fogs.

Yet, Jon found himself missing the contact already. It hadn’t even been three seconds and already Jon was longing for Martin’s touch like a needy child. His fingers were growing cold and his heart was palpitating with the ferocious urge to just grasp Martin’s hand and superglue it to his. Never in his life had he ever felt this possessive but he really couldn’t be blamed after losing so much.

As soon as Martin got his front door to open though, he turned to look at Jon with the most tender smile, and held his left hand towards him. “How about we switch hands? My other one’s gotten quite moist.”

The warmth that swelled in Jon’s chest was a ridiculous thing but he quickly snatched up that offered hand anyway.

It was stupid, trying to pack clothes into a suitcase with two hands of two different people, but they somehow made it work. And when it was Jon’s turn to pack his bag, they allowed the same silly process to repeat itself. And if they shared a hug in the middle of the living room, no one would ever know.

Jon wasn’t letting go.

And Martin wasn’t letting go either.

#tmasafehousefest #jonmartin #pining #tma #the magnus archives #magpod #tma fanfic #fanfic #my writing #jonathan sims #martin blackwood #hurt/comfort #tma season four

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khunvegas · 5 years ago

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prompt: buck has an onlyfans and eddie finds it

ANON, I’M SO SORRY, SWEETIE. Time is a tricky thing but I did it. Here it is, my greatest attempt.

AO3

Eddie deleted Grindr and Tinder for the nth time that week.

It's always the same: the guy wants to meet, usually at Eddie's place, or sends a picture of themselves and then wants to meet and Eddie can't do that. He can't have a parade of men walking in and out of his house. Christopher might see that and how can you explain your 9-year-old that you're horny as fuck? But that you also catch feelings fast. And what if he catches feelings for a hook up?

Absolutely no.

He needs something more subtle and that doesn't include any sort of meeting.

Eddie can endure this dryness in his life just for the sake of Chris not knowing what's up.

He can't also tell his monumental crush how he feels because turns out Eddie is emotionally constipated and speaking about his feelings turns him into a blabbering mess or he straight-up can't speak.

So, apps like these should do the trick.

Eddie heard from one of his coworkers about this relatively new app called OnlyFans, saying that if he didn't want any awkward meetings, that was the best one.

With that in mind, he opens the app already downloaded in his phone and his log in already saved. Eddie did all of this before but he never had the courage to open it.

When he asked about it to Hen, because he knew she would keep it a secret, she explained to him that it was like Instagram— he knows what that is, he’s not that old and out of touch—, but that he has to pay first before seeing anything. He ignored the fact that Hen knew everything about it; that wasn’t his business.

He scrolls down, trying to find someone that catches his eye but no one really does. Eddie doesn’t consider himself picky but if he’s going to waste money on someone, it should be worth his money, right?

God, that sounds awful.

After 10 minutes of scrolling, he stops when he sees the profile picture of this man. It was just his mouth, nothing out of the ordinary, but there was something so captivating about those plump, rose lips. Kissable lips. And Eddie, well, he’s a weak man. His face is covered with a mask, which is a shame because Eddie has a strong feeling that his face is as beautiful as those lips.

His username is EV-B, which is as vague as the profile picture but Eddie can’t just ignore him, so he pays the subscription and he pays for a pack because he’s horny like that.

What he sees then, it makes him choke on his own saliva, already making him hard because how is this man real?

Again, Eddie can’t see his face but he supposes it’s not that important when he can see the rest. All that skin and hard muscle for Eddie to see, laying on a bed with one hand stroking himself and the other fucking himself with a pink dildo. It’s mind-blowing the effect this stranger has on him and for a short minute, he wishes he could have him here with him just to see if that skin is as soft to the touch as he thinks it is.

Might be his mind and his body aligning themselves just to prove Eddie how horny he is, but the man looks beautiful. The next phot is the man sitting down but the focus of the photo is his hardened cock, all flushed and pink, with a dollop of precum already at the tip.

Eddie swallows dry, and because he can’t stop himself now, he sneaks a hand under his pants and start stroking himself slowly, working up the speed while looking at the photo. He wishes he could be the getting him off, like he supposes the man needs. Eddie imagines getting the sweetest noises and the loudest moans from the man, driving him until the edge, kissing those thick thighs, leaving the most beautiful hickeys on that fair skin. Make him scream his name until he’s throat is sore. His back arching accompanied with a loud gasp, blunt nails digging into his own back and then he’s coming, calling Eddie’s name. Then he would open his eyes and would see hazy, ocean eyes.

And Eddie comes hard, it comes to him like a freight train, with those eyes in mind. He throws his phone to the other side of the bed and sighs loudly. Damnit. Maybe his problem is not the fact that he doesn’t want to bring anyone but the deeply need to bring one man only to his bed.

It’s a shame it’s his best friend.

∞

The next day, he’s putting his things in his locker when he sees Hen walking in.

“I really hope today is like yesterday,” she comments next to him, putting her things in her locker. “We need more days getting cats from a tree. It’s therapeutic.”

Eddie snorts. “We really do.” Nothing like a shift where nothing catastrophic happens and he’s not sore at the end of the day.

He can feel her gaze on him and when he turns, she’s almost studying him. She hums. “You look pretty well rested today. You got those 8 hours of sleep?”

He turns his head back around, successfully avoiding her gaze. Not because he feels like Hen would judge him but it’s kind of embarrassing for one of his coworkers to know that he uses an app like that. “Something like that.”

She hums again and Eddie doesn’t feel her gaze anymore. “That’s good. I’m guessing it worked whatever you did.”

Eddie nods, not trusting himself to speak about it. He’s grateful that Hen explained to him the works and wonders of this app but he wasn’t ready to talk about it like that in the open.

Right at that moment, Chim and Buck showed up, Buck grabbing his attention instantly, his smile already directed towards Eddie

“What are we talking?” Chim asks, plopping himself on the bench and looking at them.

“I was just saying that we should get more shifts like yesterday,” Hen says, raising her foot on the bench to tie her shoelaces.

They start bickering about something but Eddie just tuns them out when he feels Buck next to him, brushing his hand on his shoulder like always.

“Are we in for tonight?” Buck asks, a wide smile still on his lips.

And Eddie wants so kiss him so badly, he doesn’t know how long he will last like this. He nods. “Yeah. Chris won’t be there tonight, though. He’s staying at a friend’s house.”

Buck looks like he’s thinking about it, pondering his options. “Well, you’ll do.”

Rude. “I’m not good enough for you now?”

Buck shrugs, playing cryptic. “I mean, you’re not my favorite Diaz but it’s fine. You’re fine.”

Eddie rolls his eyes at his antics but can’t help to feel elated anyways. Some part of him is always telling him that this feels a lot like flirting but they are not, they are just friends and nothing will change because Buck hasn’t showed any romantic feelings towards him and while he says that he loves Chris, Buck is too young to have a son from another man. He can keep his feelings and his lustful wishes to himself.

“Are you guys done with the flirting?” Chim yells at them, sending them a pointed look. “We on shift now.”

They both roll their eyes and then Buck is ushering Chim out of their locker room with a “shut up. It’s not flirting.”

It just Hen and Eddie this time. Eddie is looking at him like she knows something.

“What?” He barked.

Hen raises her hands, like she doesn’t want anything to do with whatever business Eddie has but she still has a knowing smirk. “Nothing, lover boy.”

She knows. Of course she knows. It’s Hen, she always knows what’s going on. But before he can say anything, she’s already leaving.

He sighs but still he follows her because they have work to do today.

∞

Buck throws the controller on the coffee table and turns to Eddie with a winning smile on his stupid face. Eddie loves him but he also hates him.

“That was the fifth time now,” Buck says, “you need to learn to give up now, Eds.”

He also needs to control himself whenever Buck calls him like that but he can’t, it’s impossible for him now not to feel things for this man right here. “Maybe you should let me win.”

Buck stares at him a moment longer than should be considered normal. “Maybe I should.”

Eddie swallows thickly and turns his head back to the TV, avoiding Buck’s piercing gaze. Looking at those eyes brings back the memories from last night and he feels shameful for using his best friend to get off. It feels all kids of dirty.

“I’m going to the bathroom. Be right back,” Buck says, standing up and leaving the living room.

Eddie needs to get a hold of himself and his feelings. He knows he’s been subtle about it, at least when Buck is around but whenever Buck looks at him like that, like nothing else matters, Eddie wants, wishes, to take that leap of faith and tell him how Eddie feels.

He’s still pondering on his thoughts when Buck’s phone starts ringing. Looking down, he sees an unsaved number but that’s not what catches his attention. Not, it’s the background image. A mask. Same mask that this guy had from the photos.

Maybe he— No that can’t be right. Anyone could have that mask and the guy from the photos doesn’t have tattoos and Buck has plenty of them… Not that he has stared at Buck while naked but they are on plain sight, he can’t just ignore them. But that mask looks very particular to be used by anyone. He has to know if this only a coincidence.

“Ready for another round?” Buck asks when he comes back, smile on his face, cocky as always.

Eddie rolls his eyes but he can’t say no, never to Buck. “Someone was calling you.” Out of the corner of his eye, he sees Buck leaning over the table and grabbing his phone. He’s frowning but he doesn’t pay attention to the missed call and pockets his phone.

Eddie frowns too; maybe this is an annoying hook-up? Is Buck dating again? He should have told him, right? Because they tell each other that kind of things.

They start their sixth round but Eddie can’t let go the thought of that damned mask. “I wasn’t snooping or anything but I saw… Your background picture is a mask,” he says lamely, like that was enough of an explanation. He hates himself.

He sees Buck frowning. “A mask? What about it?”

“Do you wear it a lot?” Eddie asks, and winces at how bad he is to get information as subtle as possible.

Silence. The only sound is the one coming from their controllers and then Buck is pausing the game, turning towards him.

“Where are you getting at?”

“What do you mean?”

“What’s the thing with this mask you’re asking?”

Eddie tries to look at him and hold his gaze; he feels shameful that he’s even asking about this and putting himself on the spot. “Nothing.”

Buck raises an eyebrow like he doesn’t believe him.

He sighs. This is his best friend, surely Buck wouldn’t judge him for his late-night activities. “I downloaded this app that let me buy photos from different people and this guy had the same mask.”

“And you thought it was me?”

“I know it sounds crazy,” Eddie says, trying his hardest not to sound judgmental, “I know it’s not you, it’s just–”

“Oh, you mean photos like these?” And then Buck is getting his phone back out of his pocket and then he’s showing the same photo Eddie was almost salivating last night. He looks past the phone just to see Buck smirking. “I look good, huh?”

Eddie starts stuttering because there’s no way, no way this is happening. “But you– That’s– He doesn’t have tattoos.”

Buck shrugs. “Make-up. And before you ask, no one is forcing me or anything but it would be great is Maddie doesn’t know.” He grabs the controller back.

“You’re not weirded out?” Eddie ask, to which Buck turns to him confused. “I just… saw you naked.” And the whole situation from last night, takes another meaning. Shame and lust are mix right now in the pit of his stomach. Eddie can’t work with convoluted feelings like these.

Instead of Buck being uncomfortable with him, he shoots him a heated look and his smirk turns sharper. “Why would I? That has been my plan all along. Honestly, Eds, I thought you would realize after all this time.”

He knows his eyes are big as saucers and he’s more than confused and horny at the same time. He can’t speak and what is going on?”

“Realize what?”

Buck shrugs and turns back to the TV. “That I like you.”

Eddie wants to say he does too but his words get stuck on his throat and this is really happening.

“If you win this round, I’ll show you the real thing.”

Eddie chokes on his saliva again but he’s not one to back out of a challenge, especially when the “prize” involves this long-time crush he’s been harboring since he came to work with the 118.

“I like you too,” Eddie mumbles, like it’s necessary after this conversation.

Buck is not looking at him but Eddie can see the wide and pride smile he has and Eddie can’t wait until he can finally kiss those lips.

He doesn’t need any other app anymore.

------

(you guys can always support me buying me coffee :’) here)

#this is good i SWEAR #buddie #buddie fanfiction #9 1 1 fox #i wanted to write some smut BUT HEY #i didn't happen. my bad

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aladygrieve · 4 years ago

Text

Merlin/Arthur Fic Rec

** - Favourite

FANDOM CLASSICS

Castle (The Rules by Which We Live) by kickflaw Word count: 16,200 Summary: Merlin knows that getting off fastest when he’s got some BDSM porno playing loud on the computer doesn’t mean he’d really like to be that bloke, gagged and bent over and bound. Right? Notes: Modern AU and the best BDSM I’ve ever read.

Destiny That Darkly Hides Us by Nympha_Alba Word count: 63,000 Summary: It’s 1913, the practice of homosexuality is unlawful, so is the practice of magic. When Arthur Pendragon and Merlin Emrys meet as Cambridge undergrads, they’re both hungry for a real and true connection without secrets. For a short time they believe they may have found it. But war breaks out and separates them, and it seems unlikely that they will meet again. After all, what are the odds? Notes: Includes reincarnation!

Drastically Redefining Protocol by rageprufrock Word count: 46,000 WIP Summary:In which Prince Arthur meets Merlin and all hell promptly breaks loose. Notes: Modern AU in which Merlin is a chain-smoking med student and Arthur is the womanizing Prince of Wales. Includes several companion stories.

**The Student Prince by FayJay Word count: 145,200 Summary: A modern day Merlin AU set at the University of St Andrews, featuring teetotal kickboxers, secret wizards, magnificent bodyguards of various genders, irate fairies, imprisoned dragons, crumbling gothic architecture, arrogant princes, adorable engineering students, stolen gold, magical doorways, attempted assassination, drunken students, shaving foam fights, embarrassing mornings after, The Hammer Dance, duty, responsibility, friendship and true love… Notes: Because really, no rec list is complete without the novel-length jewel of the Merlin fandom. It’s plotty, beautifully written and perfectly in-character, and is especially dear to my heart now that I’ve actually visited St. Andrews. I highly recommend the podfic, as FayJay is an incredible reader.

REINCARNATION/FINALE-COMPLIANT

Hold My Heart Until it Beats by ingberry Word count: 1920 Summary: Arthur dies and waits for Albion to need him again. But most of all he waits for Merlin. Notes: Great use of the Arthur waits trope.

**Hopeless Wanderer by Magnolia822 Word count: 18,500 Summary: Merlin has been wandering the world for hundreds of years alone; one day a young blond man moves into the flat upstairs. But does Arthur remember? Notes: Still my all-time favourite reincarnation fic.

I Keep Going Over the World We Knew (Over and Over) by Mellacita Word count: 51,100 Summary: When Merlin Emrys is sent on a ‘round-the-world assignment, he begins remembering a life of magic, dragons, and kings. To make matters worse, a strange woman starts stalking him along the way. And that’s before he even meets Arthur Pendragon, whose answer to climate change is going to save the world. Because apparently just saving Britain won’t be enough this time around. Notes: Plotty and intricate and very, very cool.

Let Your Heart Hold Fast by Acavall Word count: 3000 Summary: Merlin waits for Arthur’s return, and the only way to hold on to his memories is to write them down. Over and over, again and again, as history marches by. Notes: Works interesting historical references into the reincarnation deal.

Never Let Me Go by LadyVader Word count: 3500 Summary: Merlin has walked the world for a long time waiting for his friends return. Notes: Great use of the rest of the characters.

Now I Will Unsettle the Ground Beneath You by nu_breed Word count: 42,300 Summary: Merlin’s dreams have always fuelled his art, but they’ve always been abstract and removed from reality. Soon after he meets Gwaine, he starts to see vivid images of a past full of death and magic and love for a King who was ripped from him. Things only escalate further when he spends a weekend in the country with Gwaine and meets his group of friends, which includes aristocrat and It Boy, Arthur Pendragon. Merlin soon realises that no matter how hard you try, one thing is certain, you can’t fuck with destiny. Notes: Merlin’s dating Gwaine but he and Arthur can’t keep their hands off each other. I love it.

Old Love, But in Shapes That Renew and Renew Forever by leopardwrites Word count: 3500 Summary: People accept that an old man might live alone. People understand that he might have lost the greatest love he has ever known. Notes: Fics that deal with old!Merlin are never not going to be gut-wrenching.

CANON ERA

A Bet by juxtapose Word count: 1100 Summary: In which the Knights stumble upon a private moment between the Prince and his manservant, Leon is uncomfortable, and Gwaine decides to make a bet. Notes: All the knights are fantastic in this one.

The Accidental Seduction by Ras Elased Word count: 9000 Summary: Arthur’s a bit dim and a prank goes horribly awry, but in the end this works out to the benefit of all involved. Notes: Almost unbearably adorable.

**Finding Home by riventhorn Word count: 7860 Summary: When Gaius retires, a new physician takes over, one that quickly kicks Merlin out of his room and takes it for himself, Arthur finds Merlin sleeping in the stables..and it’s winter. Notes: Good old-fashioned hurt/comfort with a dash of fluff. Probably my favourite canon-era fic.

**Fools of Us All by adelagia Word count: 11,100 Summary: Merlin accidentally makes everybody in Camelot fall in love with him. Everybody except Arthur, that is. Notes: Cute, funny and very in-character.

Freedom Hangs Like Heaven by derryere Word count: 9000 Summary: It’s happened five times and they don’t talk about it. Notes: The unresolved romantic tension will end you.

The Greater Bond by ravenflight21 Word count: 15,500 Summary: When Arthur is kidnapped by slavetraders, Merlin has only one option: to buy him. Playing Arthur’s master has its drawbacks – but it also has extraordinary compensations. Notes: Fabulous trope that also includes fancy dress. What more do you want?

**A Heavy Heart to Carry by ThursdayNext Word count: 12,561 Summary: When Merlin is captured and injured, Arthur must face up to his own feelings for his manservant as well as the many secrets he discovers are being kept from him. Notes: I think this might have been the first merthur fic I ever read. It’s Cold Outside by ionionie Word count: 2500 Summary: Merlin and Arthur get trapped in a cave on a freezing cold night. How do they stay warm? Notes: I’m such a sucker for this trope it’s actually sad.

**Meteorology by fayhe Word count: 4600 Summary: Character study with spot-on cameos from Uther, Morgana, Gaius and even Kilgarrah. Notes: Best Gen.

So That I Might Be Where You Areby cherrybina Word count: 4600 Summary: When a spell goes wrong, Merlin and Arthur are linked together in an unusual way, which leads to lots and lots of UST. Notes: Not kidding about the UST, which works surprisingly well. **Stars Above, Stones Below by Destina Word count: 46,800 Summary: After the disastrous end of his betrothal to Gwen and the regret of his offer to Princess Mithian, Arthur swears off finding a wife until he’s ready to wed. When Merlin offers himself to Arthur as bedmate, Arthur suggests they hand-fast in secret for a single year of mutual pleasure without obligation. As their year together unfolds, and secrets and betrayals unravel around them, Arthur and Merlin learn there is no such thing as uncomplicated pleasure. Everything they thought they knew can change in the span of a single year. Notes: Another one of my absolute favourites. Winterbloom by Shinybug Word count: 6200 Summary: Deep in the woods in the frozen heart of winter, a careless comment leads to a redefinition of Arthur’s relationship with his manservant. Notes: Emotionally-constipated boys shivering in the cold will always be one of my favourite things.

MODERN AU

A Change of Pace by kianspo Word count: 54,600 Summary: The one in which Arthur works in finances and his suits are various (two) shades of grey, Merlin works in advertisement and has no boundaries whatsoever, Morgana drinks rum, Mithian stages a coup, Agravaine is aggravating, and Elena’s house is amazing. Also, Andy Warhol is mentioned in vain, and Arthur and Merlin fall in love in Victorian era style. Notes: In which Arthur has a structured, ordered, boring life, until Merlin comes along.

This Silly ol’ Dance is Perfect for Two by SlantedKnitting Word count: 80,500 Summary: Arthur is young, gorgeous, talented, and captain of one of the best football teams in England; his life should be perfect. But he can’t keep a girlfriend for more than a few months, and it’s not just because he isn’t ready to settle down. When his most recent girlfriend dumps him, he has a rough night at the pub and has to be dragged home by his neighbour, Merlin. Merlin is an archivist, a Ph.D student, and he hates football almost as much as he hates Arthur. They both have their own reasons for not wanting to spend time with each other, but after that disastrous night, remaining silent neighbors doesn’t seem like much of an option anymore. Notes: Plotty and original. Wicked Game by winterstorm Word count: 42,400 Summary: Arthur’s the King of Camelot…nightclub. He can pick and choose who he wants, and he does – often – no promises and absolutely no repeats. The night he chooses Merlin might just be his undoing. Notes: Slight age difference.

#merthur #merlin/arthur #merlin #bbc merlin #fic recs #fanfiction #made rebloggable for your convenience

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sapphim · 4 years ago

Note

sebhawkebela: 1 - 6 for pre relationships; 1, 2, 5, and 8 for general; 1, 2, 5, 6 and 8 for love, 1, 8 and 9 hehehehe

[ship questions] guess this has been sitting in my inbox long enough huh (also pbbbbbbbbt)

Pre-relationship 1. How did they first meet? 2. What was their first impression of each other?

Bela's and Juniper's mutual first impression when they met at the Hanged Man was "is she flirting with me? she IS flirting with me. nice. im gonna tap that."

Juniper's first impression of Seb was "oh is he like a prince or something that's hot" but then her immediate and more important second reaction was "oh he's actually super lame he just wants to hang out in the chantry and talk about andraste all day nvm" and then she immediately forgot about him as soon as he left her field of vision.

mw Seb's first impression of Juniper was "oh this striking angel has appeared out of nowhere to avenge my family for me???" and then his immediate second impression was "oh. she's very mean."

Anyway Seb spent the next three years thinking about Juniper constantly he couldn't stop obsessing over her. Between acts 1 and 2 they had five additional meet-cutes. Juniper remembers absolutely none of them.

When you walk in on Seb and he's like "oh Hawke we were just talking about you :)" literally Seb hasn't once shut up about her and Elthina is so done with this conversation and Juniper's just like "do I know you"

3. Did any of their friends or family want them to get together?

Absolutely the fuck not. Nobody saw this coming. These three emotionally constipated idiots barely manage to communicate their feelings to each other, let alone anyone else. They're kinda all three easy to draw surface-level conclusions about to the point where even some of their friends never quite grok them. When Seb and Juniper get engaged their friends are like "oh okay so it's like a power thing for Hawke and a sex thing for Isabela and who knows what Sebastian's deal is (probably a sex thing)" and okay they're consenting adults and they can do whatever but like. Nobody under any circumstances thought to encourage this relationship. Except Merrill, who thinks they're cute when they're happy.

4. Who felt romantic feelings first? 5. Did either of them try to resist their feelings?

Juniper and Isabela had a casual fwb relationship for three years before they would even almost admit to themselves that they had maybe caught feelings for each other, and it was another three years before they'd admit it to each other. Morons.

Seb resisted actually getting involved in the relationship for a long time, because, you know, he thought they were just teasing him but also he cannot indulge in anything in moderation and he got kicked out of his house for hoïng around and then his family all died so! You know!! But as soon as they do finally get thru to him he is like. "okay :) i love you forever and always"

6. If you had told one of them that the other would be their soulmate, what would they think?

"sounds fake but ok"

General 1. Who initiated the relationship, and how did it go? 2. Did they have an official first date? If so, what was it like?

Bela and Juniper didn't do dates they were just like ;D and then they hooked up and that was that.

Juniper and Bela invited Seb over to a date night at Hawke's estate in act 3 and he like. Went all out. Brought flowers and wine and cooked a meal for them. Memorized some poetry. And the girls were just like "dude take ur clothes off"

5. What’s their height difference? Age difference?

Bela and Seb are teeny tiny. They're pocket sized. They're like 5'1" and 5'5" (155 and 165 cm). Fight me. Juniper is like... not quite 6'0" but 5'9" (175cm) at minimum. Lanky bastard energy.

allow me to demonstrate

No real age difference. Seb and Bela are probably a few years older than Juniper, but they're all like... mid-late-20s at the start of the game and early-mid-30s at the end.

8. Who gets jealous easier?

Juniper's the possessive one. But they're not really jealous types? More like "why yes my partners are very attractive thank u for noticing"

Love 1. Who said “I love you” first?

Look, Sebastian says it right after they all hook up, which is definitely too soon, but it's also the moment Isabela and Juniper realize that they've been together six years and they still haven't said it to each other, so he kinda gets away with it.

2. What are their primary love languages?

Seb's the only one whose love language actually involves using his words. Isabela is very touchy-feely. Juniper, well, the gift giving joke is always there with Dragon Age protags, but tbh, acts of service, primarily in the form of personally destroying anyone who ever hurt, upset, or inconvenienced you. She's not gonna say she cares but it's not that hard to figure out.

5. Who’s better at comforting the other?

Not Juniper lol.

6. Who’s more protective?

Juniper lol.

8. What are some songs that apply to their relationship, in-universe or otherwise?

I skimmed thru my hawkebela playlist and The Pierces - We Are Stars got me feeling some kinda way so let's go with that.

Domestic Life 1. If they get married, who proposes?

Only Seb would be dumb enough to.

8. Who’s more likely to convince the other to come back to sleep in the morning?

Bold of you to assume anyone's getting out of bed before noon.

9. Who’s the better cook?

Look at Sebastian... Does that look like a man who has ever cooked once in his life... No... He eats whatever slop the chantry serves and suffers in silence... When I said he learns to cook I was perhaps being overly generous... He "helps" Orana in the kitchen while she kindly pretends he's not getting in her way...

Isabela will eat or drink anything... She might not enjoy it and she might bitch about it but she cannot afford to have standards... so she does not... You don't live in a tavern in lowtown if you have standards or can cook for yourself... She has eaten boiled shoe leather at least once in her life...

As for Juniper... Do you think Leandra and Malcolm had any idea how to feed themselves when they eloped... absolutely not... A nice neighboring family probably had to take pity on them or they wouldn't survive the first winter... Plus Malcolm was always busy wrangling the girls and preventing things from catching on fire... so if anyone's learned any of Leandra's precious few homemaking skills... it's Carver... tbh he’s the only Hawke who can actually fend for himself...

What I'm saying is the bar is buried in the ground and they’re still tripping over it.

#oc blab #juniper hawke #sandayuoda

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valkerymillenia · 5 years ago

Note

What are ur headcanons for brudick?

That is a VERY good question... I actually need to think about it and add more details to this list later.

Anyway, here are some hc's, many are nsfw.

Autistic Bruce.

Sorry, the way I see it autistic/Aspergers Bruce is basically canon and the reason why I'm mentioning it in ship headcanons is because I hc that Dick learned to understand Bruce well enough that, other than Alfred, he's the only person that figured out Bruce is in the spectrum and thus knows certain things others don't (like how to tell what Bruce is feeling by his stims, knowing what causes sensory overload in Bruce, knowing how Bruce likes to be touched and when not to touch him at all, knowing when Bruce is trying to be humorous, understanding Bruce's SI's, etc, etc, etc).

Basically most people assume Batman is just emotionally and socially constipated, brooding control freak but Dick knows that Bruce actually just has issues interacting and expressing himself (unless he's playing a role like "the billionaire playboy" because scripting) because of how his brain works, and even though he doesn't know how to really express emotions he's actually hyper empathetic.

Surprisingly gentle in bed

They totally have potential to be kinky af in the bedroom (I mean, masks and leather and between Bruce's vigilante persona and Dick's flexibility...) and their relationship is often intense and turbulent but they're actually super dedicated and gentle with each other because Dick is a helpless romantic and Bruce is secretly starved for affection and will take all he can.

Nonetheless, they do have kinky sides, like:

Bruce is more experienced and knows a lot of positions, some of which can only really be performed with someone as bendy as Dick.

Both of them are thrill seekers and kinda get really turned on by danger even if they won't admit it (Bruce keeps trying to be responsible and not get distracted in dangerous situations but when Dick is also around sometimes things happen, specially if Dick gets bored).

Dick kinda really likes roleplaying (and likes the idea of pulling out his old police uniform or Robin costume to play with).

Sparring as foreplay.

They are both pretty flexible in bed when it comes to who tops and who bottoms but ultimately they are both just very generous lovers

Dick is the loudest is bed but the thing he loves most is when he gets Bruce to be a little noisy too

Dick is a damn tease and Bruce secretly gets jealous easily. On the other hand, Bruce knows how to tease back by letting others flirt with him in public because he knows it riles Dick up

Bruce really likes backrubs. Dick really likes cuddling.

Bruce also gets grumpy and jealous of Dick's fanboying over Superman (although they both secretly have Clark as their guilty choice for a threesome)

They actually argue a lot less than people think

A lot of awkward pinning for the longest time

Bruce doesn't mean to but occasionally dads Dick, surprisingly Dick doesn't mind and actually find it kinda... amusing

Bruce learns Dick's Romani dialect specifically to have private (and affectionate) conversations with him in public

Bruce is actually really frustrated by Dick's puns and word play but he doesn't say anything because Dick's smile is worth it

Bruce really, really, really doesn't like Midnighter because he gets irrationally jealous when the man interacts with Dick (he's not sure why)

Sometimes people start talking about vigilantes around Bruce Wayne because it's Gotham, Bruce pretends to be disinterested, however if anyone mentions anything negative about Nightwing, Bruce goes immediately defensive and tense ("what do you mean some people don't like Nightwing? Who? I need names")

Whenever they have a fight, Bruce has a really bad habit of buying Dick gifts instead of apologizing (because he's way too stubborn), they are always thoughtful and interesting gifts though, he actually puts more effort into them than he cares to admit (there was one memorable time that they didn't speak for two weeks and Bruce ended up buying Dick a rare classic car)

Bruce often has nightmares but Dick knows how to soothe him, on the other hand, Dick usually only has nightmares when he's sleeping alone and sometimes he'll call Bruce in the middle of the night because he "misses him" and Bruce immediately knows what's up

Dick is not the best at it but he actually likes to cook for Bruce so sometimes he'll give Alfred evenings off; the one single time Bruce tried to do the same, well, they ended up eating Chinese takeout

Dick is naturally more paternal towards Damian than Bruce is and it's actually a big thing in their relationship that nobody really has the guts to talk about (except Talia, who hates it)

Damian once caught Bruce and Dick making out in the batcave showers and spent the rest of the week avoiding them like the plague because he just didn't know how to cope (Jason actually took the kid out for ice cream and Tim chose not to give him a hard time about it because they can both relate)

Whenever Bruce buys Godiva chocolates for Dick it's because he did something Dick will be mad about

Bruce has had more than one fantasy about proposing to Dick but never actually goes through with it

Dick has a habit of sending flowers to Bruce's office every once in a while just because he likes flowers and wants Bruce to know he was thinking of him (he likes people to know Bruce is taken)

Dick's desktop picture is a photo of him and Bruce at the circus

Their first kiss was a hot mess, all desperate and anxious and intensely emotional. There were a lot of mixed feelings going around because they still kinda had some hang-ups about their past mentor/ward relationship but they also dragged out the pinning and sexual tension for so long that it ended up being a hell of a rush

Dick really likes pet names but Bruce isn't creative in that front so while Dick will call Bruce a myriad of things like "old man", "big bat", "daddy bats", "big guy", "B", "honey", "sweetheart", etc, Bruce usually just sticks to "Dick" and occasionally "dearest" ("Robin" also slips out sometimes, as does "chum" out of habit)

Bruce steals the covers at night (Dick doesn't really care that much though)

Bruce remembers everything, every special date, every little casual comment Dick might have made about something he likes, every kiss, every memory, every request, every birthday, every anniversary. He just remembers everything about Dick (who isn't forgetful either but doesn't make as big a deal out of it)

Bruce doesn't curse often, Dick does but usually not around Bruce. Unless they're in bed, then they both curse but in a good way.

If Dick gets hurt Bruce just automatically feels guilty (even when there's nothing he could have done to prevent it) and will do anything to fix the situation. He will also avoid Dick out of said guilt.

When Bruce gets hurt, Dick also has the unbridled desire to fix everything but rather than blame himself he tends to angry at the situation in general and does all he can to fix it. Unlike Bruce, Dick will actually hover and refuse to leave Bruce alone.

#brudick #brucedick

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ketzwrites · 6 years ago

Text

Rewatch 112: Malec

Love. That’s it. That’s the comment.

No, of course it isn’t.

Teaser

I’m still surprised by how neatly Jace and Clary’s arrival with the Mortal Cup tied things up, but hey, let’s get right to the wedding, then.

We’re underserved when it comes to Jace and Izzy interactions and this one is as impersonal as they come. I want some follow through on Alec saying Izzy is his sister, not his and Jace’s. I want Izzy talking to Jace about his finding out he is Valentine and Jocelyn’s son. Anything more than this bland “Jace is angry, Izzy is not.”

Act One

Clary seems at peace now that Jocelyn is safe. Not happy, of course, but her tone of voice is calmer, more centered. Good acting on Kat’s part in a season she is mostly known for butchering.

Funny how Alec and Clary were smiling at each other and, you know, having a sort-of-friendship in this season only for the writers to go “nope, Alec is back to completely and only hating her” on the start of the next one.

Now, I don’t get this move on Magnus’ part. In their last conversation, he tried to talk Alec out of sacrificing himself. Alec didn’t listen. Now Magnus is… seducing him out of sacrificing himself? Why is Magnus this invested in Alec? I’m glad he is, but why?

Magnus says he will not ask again, but then there is never a scene in which Magnus asks Alec what his choice is. There is only Magnus being passive-aggressive.

Why doesn’t Clary tell Simon she and Jace are siblings? By what she says in this phone call, it sounds like they had a fight. Good thing Simon knows what’s going on.

Jace and Clary are so awkward. I love it.

Interesting how Magnus protests Ragnor being the list, but not Catarina or Tessa. It’s purely Magnus being an ass to his friend.

Alec and Magnus are so awkward. I love it. Still don’t understand why Magnus would act entitled to Alec’s love like this, but I love it.

Awkward exposition delivery by extraordinarily pretty Izzy. I see you, Ed Decter. Good move.

Alec’s jokes are so underrated. Platinum, Turning over a new leaf, Sisters can really drive you nuts sometimes. All very witty, all deserve more recognition.

When you first watched this scene, could you imagine that Jace was right? Jocelyn really didn’t want her son Jonathan. Well, that Jonathan wasn’t Jace, but the point is: Jocelyn really is the asshole that Jace paints her to be. Valentine didn’t even have to lie about that.

Act Two

I honestly see Jace’s discomfort in discussing his feelings for Clary as being nauseated by the notion that he fancied his sister. Not an “I still love her, so I feel bad”. A “how could I think I was in love with my sister?”

Why is the fire green? Because it’s a wink to Ragnor being green in the books. It has to be because green fire on green grass looks awful.

Subtle changes in your eyes? Subtle? Also, if Jocelyn and Ragnor met in the early 90s while they lived in Idris, that means they met while Jocelyn was a Circle Member. Why is Ragnor on her side??

I love how the characters say “the Book of the White”. Everyone says it like it like it’s one word “debukofdewyt”. I also love the friendship between Magnus and Ragnor.

I wish we’d seen something that warned us Jace, Clary, and Magnus were being followed. It would make Ragnor’s death less sudden and, thus, less ridiculous. A warlock considered more powerful than Magnus shouldn’t die out of the attack of one Shax demon.

Act Three

How does Izzy still think the people in Institute are her family when they sat and watched in silence that farce of a trial almost derune and exile her?

Question: if Lydia is Head of the Institute, wouldn’t they have to run the mission to Ragnor Fell through her anyway? In fact, wouldn’t they need her permission? I’m just saying, anyone with high enough access could’ve learned about this mission from looking at the files. We know the mole was Hodge, but it’s a possibility that Jace, Clary, and Izzy should’ve entertained.

There’s no way Lydia would “slip up” with the way Clary conducted that conversation. It’s almost as if Clary doesn’t think Lydia is guilty and just wants to give her a Shovel Talk on behalf of Alec.

“Alec’s love for his family and his desire to restore the Lightwood name have touched me in ways I haven’t felt in a long time” is so uncomfortable to hear coming from a straight woman about to marry a gay man.

Simon ordering around vamps and borrowing Raphael’s clothes is so confusing to me. Does that mean he and Raphael are friends now? Friendly? Is Simon fitting in? What is this?

Regardless, the first instance of Izzy and Simon being friends.

I still don’t get if Ragnor’s apparition is supposed to be magic or if it’s supposed to be a figment of Magnus’ imagination.

Goddammit. I don’t care about Alec and Jace’s friendship. I have no idea what their relationship was before Clary showed up – or rather, the little that I know comes from Simon saying that Jace treats Alec like a lap dog, Izzy defending Alec from Jace, and Jace saying that Alec would die for him. None of that makes me want Alec and Jace to be friends the way they were before.

Okay. I’m not on board of Alec equating his feelings for Magnus to Jace’s feelings for Clary in this context. They are talking about a normal love between two men equated to romantic love between siblings. Those things are not equivalent and that should’ve been pointed out.

What I am on board with is Alec hijacking the conversation and shifting it from Clary to Magnus and Jace going along with it. This is the first and only conversation Jace and Alec have about Alec’s feelings.

Act Four

I absolutely love this scene with Magnus and Ragnor. The only way to make it better would be to link this conversation about love to Magnus grieving for his lost friend.

Maryse being proud of Alec in these circumstances breaks my heart.

Simon’s little smirk over catching Jace staring makes him look like a douche. Congrats, man. The girl you like isn’t in a relationship anymore because she and her boyfriend found out they are both kids of a psychotic blood supremacist who messed up her boyfriend’s mental health. How fortunate for you.

The Malec Kiss. Enough said. Okay, just one thing. I’m glad Magnus didn’t burst in saying he objected to the wedding. He walks in as if he’s just coming to the ceremony and seems genuinely surprised it has already begun. Then, it’s Alec that takes the opportunity and puts an end to this madness.

Act Five

The order of reactions immediately after Alec’s coming out: Magnus. Maryse and Robert. Izzy. Simon??

I’m not going to lie. I shipped Lydia and Jace the first time I saw this scene. I did.

I adore this shot of Magnus’ hand and the objects burning into existence. And the fact that Magnus’ presence in the Institute continues to miraculously make Alec lose pieces of clothing. First, it was his shirt, now it’s his jacket.

So, nobody questions Clary about the Alternate Dimension? Neither Magnus nor Alec has any reason to have known she went there.

Again, I wish there was more of a build-up to an attack on Lydia. Someone following her. We could even learn it was Hodge here. Maybe he pretends to go check on her and then attacks her? Just something so this doesn’t come out of nowhere like this.

Act Six

When I first read the books, I read “JC” in Portuguese in my mind. “Jota Cê.” That’s very different from “Jay Cee”. I don’t know if I would have caught that Jace = JC had I read it in English. I kind of want it to be mentioned earlier in the show just to be dismissed like “Jonathan Christopher was a very common name at the time” or something like that, but I understand the dramatic value of having Jace make the connection now.

Not to be that person, but Jonathan’s hair is in that box. Izzy is a forensic scientist. She could’ve done a simple DNA test to check if the famously manipulative Valentine was telling the truth.

Just as with Alec and Jace’s friendship, I never saw enough darkness in Jace to believe it when he says it has always been there. Arrogant? Yes. Emotionally constipated? Definitely. Evil? Nope. Not the guy who warned Simon about Izzy’s cooking, that studied the Seelies culture, that risk everything for a girl he was crushing on.

Alec standing up to his parents is a delight. Funny how Maryse was the clear villain while Robert is the more sympathetic parent. Not going to call him all the way supportive, but he at least tried to understand what was going on. Also, the little interactions between Alec and Magnus. sdsa;ksk my heart.

Yes. This exchange between Hodge and Luke. This is what Hodge should’ve done with Lydia. By now, we’d be watching Hodge in action and yelling for Luke not to go. Though, there is no reason for Hodge to invoke Valentine in the middle of the training room. That’s kind of a public place in the Institute. You’d think he would be more careful.

#ketz rewatches shadowhunters #sh 112 #sh meta

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