#emmerdale meta

[foreverrhapsody]

#911 is very much a product of its genre#and that's neither a positive nor a negative thing imo#but if you're expecting it to be an intricate longform romance or a work of serious prestige television#you're going to be perpetually disappointed

is it too controversial to say that i think this fandom's biggest mistake was internalizing the idea that 9-1-1 is deeply intelligent and that the writers are on some whole other cosmic level? because. it was. like. this is not a hater post and, unlike some of you (not shade), i don't think 9-1-1 has declined in quality. i think it's a procedural that acts like a procedural. but. i do think that internalizing this idea that the writers are creative geniuses has deluded veeeery many of you into thinking you will like Every Single Idea that comes out of the writer's room. which is not realistic. subsequently, when these stories do not pass your personal muster, 9-1-1 is suddenly a Bad Show with Declining Quality when, really, it's just doing what procedurals do best, which is be campy, outlandish, and predictable. this + the glorification of season three as the Best Season, Perfect Television, No Faults Whatsoever has made very many people very unhappy campers in these later seasons which is... unfortunate. not my problem, but unfortunate nonetheless !

[nightguide]

OBERLIN NEURO-PSYCHOTHERAPY AND PROFESSIONAL PI

LISTEN THICK SHIT, YOU'LL NEVER SING IT AGAIN BUT MAYBE SOMEONE ELSE WILL: REYNOLDS WORLD (YOU HEARD IT HERE FIRST)

VAPE PENS 139: 2ml CAPACITY PER THOUGHT (SOMEONE ELSE WILL DO IT FOR YOU)

GAVISCON ADVANCE PEPPERMINT LIQUID: BAD FOR DIGESTION (INNER TURMOIL BECOMES REALITY TO YOU (PERSONALLY)

HICHWA R.D. : DONT LOOK AT HIM

INTRUSIVE THOUGHT: "THE MAN LOOKED UP AND SAID CHEERFULLY:"

STACK:

CUSTOMER HAS LOST WEIGHT UNINTENTIONALLY?

DIFFICULTY BREATHING OR SWALLOWING?

SWOLLEN GLANDS IN NECK AND/ OR ARMPITS?

NECK STIFFNESS?

SYMPTOMS WORSEN QUICKLY?

HIGH FEVER?

CUSTOMER IS PREGNANT, BREASTFEEDING OR TAKING MEDICATION?

NO

RECOMMEND PRODUCT (PHARMACEUTICAL PULL)

LAST SEEN: 20/12 (THERAPIST DA (DOWAGER PRIMUS)

GENOCIDE ACT: BEVERLY HILLS

GAS: NO AIR

GARROTTE: NO BODY (SINGLE)

OMNISCIENT: PARENTAL CONTROL (AFFINITY)

REALPOLITIK: NEANDERTHAL EXPRESSION (LAST EX BOY SISTER)

PASSABLE: BEST NOWHERE (LIFELIHOOD)

DEAD MAY: RAVEN CALLED

TWINKLE: ANCY

993: PERMISSION ACCESS

ATLAS: SYMBOL PRODUCT (NO VOME)

ACCOMPANIED NEIGHBOURHOODS DENIED ACCESS FOR TREASON:

INSECTICIDE: PERSONS MAY BE INTO A FALLEN ANGEL TROPE CAUSED TO KILL A DIAMOND BABY (RICH HOME PARADOX)

PROLICIDE: HOME HARBOURING A YEASTED ANGEL (WRONG DISCUSSION)

BACILLICIDE: YOURSELF ONLY 'FOR PEOPLE TO BELIEVE YOU AS REYNOLDS TARGET ANGEL (REEVESINIAN PARADOX)'

VITICIDE: NO WORDS (BLEEDING ACID)

SUICIDE: PANGEA

ALIBI: PARKED CAR

ZOOPHYTE: SYNDROME (INCREDIBLES DEFECT)

SPHRAGISTICS: SIGNS ON TELEVISION INDICATING A FUTURE LED WORTH (NO WORTH FOUND IN JEWELLERY MONEY (SOMEBODY ELSE'S FUTURE BEING STOLEN FOR ADAM AND EVE IDIOT PLAN (YOU SHOULD NEVER HAVE HAD SEX)

RADIOPHONICS: FREQUENCY WAVES AFFECTING META-GROUPS OF 15 (ATTRACTION NUMBER BY HATEBREAK (SOCIAL BASTARD PARALYSIS)

WONDERKID CAME THOUGHT: REASON (FEAR ATROPHY)

METABOLISM: CRYING FOR HELP

LESBIANISM: NO HOME CALLER (NEVER PICKING IT UP BECAUSE OF YOUR OWN CONTROVERSY THOUGHT AS A 'DEMI LOVATO' WANNABE (EW)

TRACTARIANISM: NO REASON TO FIND FEUDS TO A GODLY MAN NAMED 'EEVES' (WORLD CORRUPTION TO A DEAD MAN CAMPAIGN (EW, I MADE IT - ANTHEM (ONLY TO BE EATEN ALIVE 'ONCE BABIES ARE SILENCED')

KILLED BY: IN ASSOCIATION WITH

ARCHAISM: NO MAN CAN HAVE YOU

NEOLOGISM: NO BREATH (SEX)

GASCONISM: GLEE RELATIONSHIP PSYCHE BREAKS SKILLS (FAN FICTION DOES NOT HARBOUR BUT MADE)

HYPERBOLISM: FAT JOKES

SPOONERISM: NO FING TO HERG (NORTHERNERS PLAYING YOU ON TV (EMMERDALE)

SOLECISM: FANBASE EQUATED TO SEXUAL ANIMOSITY (EAT ME)

DEAD TO OF THE THOUGHT: TRY ME

ASTACOLOGY

AGRIOLOGY

DYSTELEOLOGY

ELECTROLOGY

CARPOLOGY

KONIOLOGY

HAMARTIOLOGY

MEREOLOGY

NEURYPNOLOGY

NOOLOGY

OSTEOLOGY

OTOLOGY

PESTOLOGY

SINOLOGY

THEROLOGY

UFOLOGY

VIROLOGY

XYLOLOGY

ZYMOLOGY

WHISPER OF THE QUR'AN (ISLAMOPHOBIA): DEAD FANBASE

ANALYSIS

CATALYSIS

BIOLYSIS

CYTOLYSIS

DIALYSIS

FRONTOLYSIS

GLYCOLYSIS

KARYOLYSIS

NEUROLYSIS

ONCOLYSIS

PARALYSIS

MONOEND DESTRUCTION: TRUTH FOUND

DITTOLOGY (SUFFERING OF THE END)

RESSURECTION: PI TERMINATION (NEW LIFE)

BAROMETRY (ATMOSPHERIC PRESSURE)

CHRONOMETRY

CRANIOMETRY

DYNAMOMETRY

MICROSEISMOMETRY

NOTE TO FOUR SCORE:

HALITOSIS

[castielmoriarty]

to anyone who has had any doubts about Aaron’s feelings for Rob vs. for Ben (not that I get how you could); here’s your ultimate proof. only a few days after Ben’s death and Aaron is sitting there talking about how the village hasn’t been the same since Rob was there. going through with a move, and smiling as he drives; he had hardly left the couch at that point after Rob. he got severely depressed for a while after that, to the point where it took him several weeks before he could allow himself to fully feel it, the full impact of that despair, and have that breakdown. he loved Ben but he was ‘just’ a boyfriend. Robert is everything to him - just like Aaron is to Rob. (and they should have played their fucking song.) but there’s also something about him seeing Adam again. Adam was one of his many traumatic losses, and I can just imagine that reunion. and tbh I think that after Rob, Adam is the one who is the best at comforting him. I think he’ll be ok. and I know he’ll be visiting Rob now that his family can’t try to stop him. :)

[bartsugsy]

this is my rebecca white meta lol

ok, for my own reference (bc no joke I’ve tried to find these more than once) (apparently I'll never let some things go), I've decided to compile links to all of the meta I wrote about rebecca white during that one period in 2017 where I was having regular breakdowns over trying to make her anything more than a plot device and failing. 

I'm still missing posts, they’re buried deep in the archive, but even still there truly are.... thousands of words contained within these links. after spending some time revisiting them all... honestly, I stand by most of it. rebecca, specifically in 2017, was a travesty of a character. she existed to tell robert’s story and for no other reason. the writing for her was, across the board, atrocious and I hate to see that for female characters. legitimately, I hate it.

so many people supported her at the time and claimed that not supporting rebecca was just misogyny, but honestly... her entire character is so offensive to me still. and I'm sad because it didn’t have to be that way. and ah did I twist myself up in pretzels to try and find ways for her to not be that way. 

(and I think they redeemed her in 2018 and then ruined it again but oh my god I'm not getting into it it’s fine)

SO. HERE’S A BUNCH OF META ABOUT REBECCA THAT I WROTE, MOSTLY BEMOANING HOW TERRIBLY WRITTEN SHE IS. this is, as best I can tell, in chronological order.

please enjoy this trip down memory lane, featuring my unending frustrations around trying to write meta for a plot that so heavily hinged on the most plot device-y character known to man, rebecca white: 

-- the posts --

ons meta (this is not so much rebecca meta, but still a good place to start and possibly the kindest I'll be towards her in any of these posts)

follow up to the ons meta

the plot device abortion

rebecca isn’t a good friend for Robert (feat. get rob a friend 2k17)

rebecca doesn’t know what aaron knows

i do some rewatching of rebecca’s first scenes

I suddenly realise that rebecca white has zero agency

I talk about the episode where rebecca publicly reveals she’s still pregnant  (feat. that one rebecca/aaron home farm scene yeah you know the one)

don’t write female characters who simply exist to prop up your male characters (an essay, a breakdown)

is rebecca supposed to be the purest of the whites? (feat. a fair amount of consent discussion cw)

I accidentally predict the 2017 break up

were robert and rebecca ever really friends at all?

predicting the future of rebecca white

a conclusion: rebecca is a female character designed entirely to prop up a male character this is the longest and probably most comprehensive post on my thoughts on rebecca in 2017. feat. this quote, which pretty much sums up everything I have to say on the matter and thus serves as the ultimate tl;dr for this post: 

“robert is in many ways a villain in [rebecca’s] story and the story they want to tell is more robert being a villain in his own story. they’re not telling rebecca’s story. not at all.”

[dinglemingle]

I feel like they're gonna kill someone else off because as much as everyone wanted Paul gone,no one's gonna miss him so it's not tragic or sad

So who will it be?

Jimmy? I doubt it,he's the last remaining King (of the original brothers) and a long-standing well loved character. I feel like if they were going to kill him off then it'd be his own big sl. Also it would pretty much end the custody SL as Juliette would probably get Carl. This wouldn't be good as 1) they'd be taking away a young King and be again removing iconic families and 2) what would they do with Nicola? She'd grieve,lose Carl, grieve some more and then...?!! Her and Jimmy's realtio ship is kinda her main thing. If he died would she be able to manage the haulage company? I'm not too sure,which would then take away her other main component. So I'm ruling Jimmy out

Vinny? No. Why? 1) Would they really kill off both of Mandy's main family members? 2) If he dies it'll be Aaron and Liv's word about the abuse?? There's no way Mandy would believe them. If he lives however it'll be good conflict as Vinny probably won't want to say anything because Mandy is grieving,so he'd bottle it up for weeks before it would finally all come out. Great drama and angst. 3) He's technically a Dingle and he's just old enough to have more adult and less teen SL"s. Do I really like Vinny? No,but the show and the general public definitely do,I can see them having Vinny copes with his abuse sl, maybe they'll try make him a knock off Aaron who knows! Either way,he has some potential,I don't think it's him.

Which leaves everyone's favourite pointless ,personality less,plot device ,Liv!

Of course we all dislike for a multitude of reasons but from the producers perspective it also makes sense

1) Sad Aaron being sad. It's the shows biggest gimmick,has been for over a decade. Danny is fantastic at angst heartfelt stuff, they'd be stupid to waste that. Plus it'd give him more screen time which surely they want seen as Aaron is a public favourite.

Also, it'd be a way to introduce Ben again (dramatic sigh). Aaron's sad,he 'needs' Ben. I hate it as much as everyone else but given the show atm,it seems a route the producers would take. Why else would Ben show up?? He turns up having heard of Liv's death, see's Aaron's state decides to stick around and try help him,boom, romance! (What do we do to deserve this honestly)

2) What are they going to do with Liv after this sl? She'll comfort Vinny, they'll get back together and then??? She's an adult now, she's passed getting drunk with Gabby and terrorising pensioners. Everyone else has moved on,she still feels like a child. Gabby is up at home farm, rivalling with Kim Tate,she's had jobs, she's having a baby, she could potential be the next soap bitch. What has Liv done? She isn't in education,she doesn't have a job,she hasn't really had her own story line in 5 whole years! Everything she's been involved with has been as a sideline to the other characters. Robron, Jacob, Vinny. The things she could have had were dropped or not very good. Prison sl didn't really have much impact,no real aftermath. Alcoholism was just glossed over. Asexuality was better than the rest but still a bit lackluster. She's the shows (and maybe soaps??) first explicitly and out asexual character yet they don't explore it that much,a waste! Epilepsy is what, pending? Okay so she hasn't been diagnosed,then show us how she's feeling about that, show us her fear,her anger! Anything!

To me,she feels like a nothing character. There is nothing for her in Emmerdale. Roblivion (shudders) dead, Ryan's gone,they don't know if he's coming back so they can't just wait around. Her wanting a stable family unit made sense when she was 16 but she has the Dingles now?? It doesn't make much sense anymore to have that narrative,she's literally referred to as 'our Liv' so...

Besides even of Ryan does come back she will definitely be in her twenties, maybe thinking about living on her own, having a career or something. The whole kid sister robron doing the dad bit will be past it then. They will be in their thirties, being parents,not really pushing people through floorboards and nicking cars anymore. It's inevitable that they will become a bit less prominent as the younger characters (cough liv cough) take centre stage

But as I've said,she has nothing going for her. Iz is young, she's a great actor and has a flourishing music career (her cover of the winner takes it all is one of my favourites). From that interview she seemed a bit idk bored?? She clearly didn't give a shit about Ben and only mentioned Robron. If were her I'd be sick of being sidelined and only appearing to meddle in my brother's love life. I don't think Iz had much reason to stay,she deserves better.

Anywaysss that's my take, dragged on a bit but I'm passionate

Do I honestly think they'll kill her? Probably not cause Emmerdale hates us and the producers couldn't make a good sl if it slapped them in the face,but I can hope at least, and it's the most logical approach.

[eloquentmydear]

It was written terribly, but perhaps the reason Aaron has taken a step back from the Seb situation is to encourage Ross to take a step back too? After all, Ross said he was there for the same reason Aaron was, and both Robert and Aaron have made a point about Ross being more difficult/unreasonable than Rebecca. It's possible that what he meant by "leaving it to Robert and Rebecca" is him trying to get Ross to butt out?

[regularkat]

I realized something today, my problem with Seb isn’t actually about Seb personally. 

I have a problem with a soap in the year 2017/18 giving a same sex couple a baby through cheating. To make matters worse they seemingly brought in a female character only to get her pregnant and then for her to die/leave so the couple can get the baby. And they didn’t even pretend her existence in the show was for any other purpose (her personality changes, not interacting with anybody apart from the baby sl...).

This whole thing is just so homophobic and biphobic and sexist and misogynistic, not to mention the whole pro choice narrative they pushed, and I project all of this on this tiny baby. 

If Seb stays I will be okay, I will love them as a family, but at the same time I will always see all these issues I just mentioned, it may become smaller in my head, but it will never fully go away. And all of this is the main reason why I don’t want Seb to stay. 

If Seb leaves his existence would make all of these issues a bit less bad because then Rebecca wasn’t just brought in to give Robron a baby, but to challenge them as a couple or make Robert see that he can’t go on the way he is, or whatever the hell they’re trying to do. 

Sorry this became a bit long, but realizing this helped me today, I don’t know why but it kind of took a weight off me, and maybe for somebody else reading this they may realize it’s similar for them and might help them, too. 

[saras-almanac]

What’s so frustrating to me is that there are kernels of good storytelling in Emmerdale currently but they either don’t trust themselves to write it, trust their audience to wait a little for it to happen naturally, or care to actually make it make sense within the narrative and the characters they’ve created. 

So Rebecca... it would be a lot easier to understand that she’s acting completely unlike herself if she, I don’t know, actually had a personality post ONS? Honestly, she came to the village as one person and over time she just changed to be whatever the narrative needed her to be. The problem with that is that she always feels out of character to me. As heartless as it might sound, this trend of Rebecca not caring for her son doesn’t feel as out of character as the show probably means it to be because to me her lack of character leading up to all this made it seem like she was having this baby out of spite for Robert and Chrissie. Of course, the show didn’t play that way, but like, they also didn’t really give Rebecca a voice post her demanding that she’s going to keep the baby because Robert wants her to terminate it. So in all honesty, this lack of care for Seb could just be her actual feelings manifesting because when you don’t want a baby 100% (*cough*Chas/Paddy*cough*), there’s probably going to be some resentment there. 

Of course, this is just one interpretation, but it’s something that could have easily been fixed if the show actually just allowed Rebecca to be a person instead of a plot womb. Everything still could have happened, but there could have been some comments on how Rebecca wasn’t a vicitm in this ONS. Let her own that a bit; the show completely forgets that she chased both before and after the ONS so like... where did her personality go? I’m just going to need more than Vic saying that things are bad and she’s not acting like herself for me to care more about what’s happening to Rebecca. 

Onto the Chas pregnancy thing... It’s so insulting that people have taken the stance to just “give it a go” because this will eventually be a baby? My thoughts are if you’re not 100% excited and sure of your decision to raise a child, then it has to be a no. All this talk of not wanting Chas to make a decision she’ll end up regretting. Not to be crass, but she could have a child after this even if she has an abortion now. The only decision she can’t undo is to actually have the child and decide she didn’t really want to raise it. On top of all that, Chas’s reasonsings for not wanting a baby stem from the fact that she messed Aaron up and doesn’t want to do that again. Why did we need this? She already had really good and valid reasons for not having a baby?? But those are not good enough because their selfish, apparently? It feels like we’ve been getting more of Paddy’s POV on why he wants a baby and not enough on Chas. 

It’s also incredibly rude and insulting that ED seems to think that the only way you can really have a bond with a child is through blood. 

Priya... I’m actually interested in where this situation is going. I can’t, in good faith, believe that ED is actually going to give us a child-abusing Priya because that’s really not something to mess around with. So I’m assuming that it’s not going to happen because I will be furious. 

But Priya’s had a bit of a rough time and all this pressure was bound to come crashing down on her eventually--welcome to the wonderful world of having anxiety my friend. Ever since her husband left, Priya has been trying to keep it all together and then she started an affair with Pete behind Leyla’s back (I’m still not sure why this was the route they went cause it came out of nowhere). Her break-down has been a long time coming in a sense. It’d be nice to see her and Robert maintaining that friendship they built the other week because if anyone knows what it feels like to hit rock bottom, my boy Rob does. 

Now the Laurel and Bob thing... I guess I get it? On one hand at least, but it feels incredibly out of character that Laurel would have slept with Bob to begin with and then is sneaking around Brenda’s back about it. 

That’s the thing with Emmerdale: they rely on cheating plots constantly because that’s Interesting and Fun and Sexy and Drama...but there are other ways to get there? The reason that Robert and Aaron worked so well as an affair storyline was because it was completely unexpected and they have such chemistry together. It doesn’t hurt that it all came crashing down around them when it all came out. 

Now, we have a BUNCH of cheating storylines (Moira and Cain while Cain was with Harriet, Leyla and David while David’s with Tracy, Laurel and Bob while Bob’s with Brenda). Those are just the ones from the past two months. 

Cain’s worked for me because of the emotional weight between him and Moria and then how it all came out to Harriet and she was allowed to feel whatever she was feeling. David’s doesn’t work because he’s an asshole who’s hiding it from his wife and then had the fucking gall to be an asshole to her for her past--from before she even knew him--while pretending like he’s husband of the year. While Tracy’s storyline lately was really good and well-acted, it lost so much of the punch because the entire time I’m like, David’s a dick girl, get out!

Now...Bob and Laurel don’t really have the chemistry to pull off this affair storyline. But you know what would have worked a lot better:  friends that are slowly developing feelings for each other. There’s no sex involved so there’s no actual cheating. It’s just the natural progression of some relationships that they have to work through. Bob’s worried that he just wants to try something new like a mid-life crisis or that he’s projecting onto Laurel. Laurel worried that she’s betraying Ashley and wondering if she’s latching onto Bob because he’s been there for her through so much. Are they really falling in love or is it something else? That could have gone on a bit and they would eventually have to come to some sort of decision. 

In summary, sometimes drama doesn’t have to come from cheating. It can come from other sources. Also... give characters personalities and you’ll be surprised how the story happens around them and to them. (It’s seriously like they’re trying to shove the circle block through the triangle hole and that just doesn’t work)

[stopthefeeling]

I have no problems with the trope of staying in a new relationship while still being in love with your ex, it adds to the drama and tension and makes you root for the original couple to get back together- it keeps you hooked, which is largely what soaps are designed to do.

Robron and Coira have both successfully used the trope with Alex and Harriet, however now they're using it with Paddy/Rhona and Chas. That could work... except the audience don't care enough about Paddy and Rhona so it simply falls flat. It worked for Robron and Coira because they're super couples, but Paddy/Rhona just...isn't, and that's my problem with this storyline.

[robrongifs]

[lonelier-version-of-you]

The saddest thing about Harriet’s scenes recently is how casual she’s being in her self-hate.

She’s saying things like “I’m a lost cause” and “I’m a waste of space” like they’re obvious facts. She talks about how worthless she is like she’s talking about the weather.

She’s just - she’s coming at things with this attitude that of course she’s worthless, of course she doesn’t deserve to be a vicar anymore, why would anyone think otherwise. Her thinking is so distorted and she doesn’t even realise it.

I’m not usually one to throw around phrases like “lacking insight”, but Harriet actually does lack insight about how ill she is and that makes me very sad. She just seems to see the pain she’s in as some kind of punishment she deserves. It’s heartbreaking.

[castielmoriarty]

those of y’all saying things about Vanity such as “I can’t see a way back for them anymore” “they’ve destroyed any hope I had about them at this point :/” etc. need to seriously calm down. it’s a soap. did you expect them to start dating within the first few weeks of Ness coming back? whenever they have a storyline that they know people are tuning in for, they aren’t going to let that story play over quicker than it has to. we also know that adults in soaps act like teenagers and say things with a lot of emotion and emphasis only to go back on it the next day. what people say usually doesn’t mean much, no matter how much they seem to mean it in the moment. you have to focus on their behaviour and the more subtle stuff. it has been clear the whole time that Charity doesn’t feel the way about Mack that she does about Vanessa. but currently she’s backpedaling because she thinks she can’t have Ness, and so she regrets messing things up with her Ness substitute. if Ness had been like “let’s get a room ;)” Charity would have already forgotten about Mack (as she has already done, because of Ness, several times.) and Ness clearly still has feelings for Charity, but she also got hurt, and won’t want to give in to those feelings without a fight. she wants to be over Charity and she’s going to do her best to convince herself that she is. dating someone else is part of it, and it’s the same thing that Charity is doing with Mack. if she focuses on being a little sad about Mack leaving perhaps she doesn’t have to think about how she literally fucked up the relationship with the love of her life by being a complete mess of a person. of course there’s a way back. a hundred couples on Ed has been in similar or worse situations and gotten back together. sooner or later Charity isn’t going to be able to keep pretending she wants Mack over Ness, and Ness’ resolve about fighting her feelings for Charity is going to break down over time. they’re going to build their friendship back up first most likely, and it will go from there. there’s absolutely a way back and it’s not even necessarily that long. just chill.

[bartsugsy]

you probably get this question all the time but when do you think Aaron fell in love with Robert like to the point of no return..

I feel like Aaron pretty much immediately went from zero to THIS IS MY FUTURE NOW, which is insane, but that’s p much robron all over.

This, tbh, helps form the basis of the proof that me and @lesfemmesdangereuses use to present our case for robron’s horrifying emotionally intimate sex life - they were so fucking committed to one another so quickly even though they spent 90% of their time sniping at one another and pretending they wanted nothing to do with each other. The only time they were e v e r not hilariously hostile to one another was whenever they were having sex/about to have sex/had just had sex - and yet it wasn’t just because of the sex because, again, they were entirely committed to one another immediately and literally unable to keep away from one another. EVEN THOUGH IF YOU SAW THEM TOGETHER HALF THE TIME IT LOOKS LIKE THEY COULDNT STAND ONE ANOTHER JFJDDHDJCJD my god

Basically, their sex life is and always has been the softest and most intimate love making experience any two humans have ever known. It’s awful.

Robert was pretty much completely in denial and all over the gaff, but still entirely unable to stay away or make any rational, sensible decision where Aaron was involved. For Aaron, however I think he pretty much knew by Christmas 2014. A whopping fucking 21 days after their first kiss.

LITERALLY THAT MORNING, VIC IS CRYING ABOUT ROB ACTING OUT BC HE ~~~CANT LET THINGS LIE~~~ AND ROBERT IS, AS ALWAYS, JUST A MESS OF DADDY ISSUES

SO AARON GOES AND CONFRONTS HIM BC HE WANTS MORE FROM THE PEOPLE IN HIS LIFE AND HE EXPECTS MORE

WHICH

PROMPTS ROBERT TO GO AND GENUINELY, GENUINELY APOLOGISE TO ANDY

HE LITERALLY STANDS THERE AND GETS EMO IN FRONT OF HIS ENTIRE FAMILY AND AARON COINCIDENTALLY OVERHEARS IT ALL AND ITS THE FIRST TIME WE SEE HOW AARON MAKES ROB A BETTER PERSON AND ITS THE FIRST TIME AARON SEES A GLIMPSE OF THE HUMAN BEING ROB COULD BE UNDERNEATH ALL THE SMUG BITTER BUTTHOLE-ISHNESS

AND THATS IT

THATS???? ALL IT TAKES???

WHEN IT ALL COMES OUT THAT ROB HAD ANDY AND KATIE’S RINGS INSCRIBED

(AND OK OK OK LETS JUST DETOUR AND TALK ABOUT THIS BEING ROB MAKING AM IMPULSIVE DECISION THAT FUCKS UP HIS RELATIONSHIPS AND HURTS THE PEOPLE HE LOVES BECAUSE HE WAS HAVING FEELINGS ABOUT ANDY AND JACK’S RELATIONSHIP AND ON THE SAME DAY ENDED UP IN A GAY BAR WITH AARON - LITERALLY SPENT 45 MINUTES STEWING ABOUT HIS ANDY AND HIS DAD WHILE IN A GAY BAR. ITS FUCKIN TYPICAL ROBERT - HE HAS ALL THE REASON IN THE WORLD TO BE UNDERSTANDABLY UPSET, BUT HE DEALS WITH THOSE FEELINGS IN THE WORST AND MOST DAMAGING WAY THAT HE LATER REGRETS AND HAS TO APOLOGISE FOR. HE DOESNT KNOW HOW TO NOT DO THE STUPID THING)

ANYWAYS, AARON DOESNT GIVE A SHIT BY THIS POINT HES ALREADY HELLA ALL IN - BECAUSE HE ALREADY KNOWS THERES A HUMAN BEING THAT NO ONE ELSE CAN SEE AND HE ALSO… HE CHOOSES TO RECOGNISE THE PART OF ROBERT THAT FEELS GUILT FOR THE STUPID THINGS HE DOES, THAT TRIES, EVEN IF HE FAILS -

AND HES *BARELY* FUCKING TRYING BY THIS POINT BUT ITS A START AND THATS APPARENTLY ALL AARON NEEDS

and it is omg because very very slowly Rob has become a better person with Aaron’s help. Uh. That’s not saying much, he’s still absolutely awful. But you know. Aaron’s about it. At this point he’s totally about it.

AARON, WHO HAS HAD SO MANY PEOPLE TRUST HIS INNER GOODNESS ENOUGH TO GIVE HIM SECOND CHANCES, SAW SOMETHING IN ROB THAT HE FELT DESERVED A SECOND CHANCE

SO HE FOLLOWS ROB OUT OF THE CHURCH AND IS LIKE…. YOU LISTENED TO ME??? YOU TRUSTED ME??? AND YOU WANTED TO DO BETTER???? WE’RE IN LOVE??? LETS BANG.

AND SO, FOR THE FIRST BUT ABSOLUTELY NOT THE LAST TIME, ROBRON MADE THE YULETIDE GAY

and were hella in love

even if only one of them could admit it

incredible

[idealuk]

You: I still can‘t see Buck as being written as bi and ending up with a guy.

Me: *Can easily compare him to Gideon ‘Zero’ Kinkade, Michael Guerin (Alex will definitely be changing his name to Alex Guerin Truman* if we don’t discover Michael’s Antarian surname beforehand), and Robert Sugden-Dingle with out even comparing Abby or Ali to Chrissie* (that’s, count them, 1, 2, 3 canon male bisexual characters Buck already has a lot in common with who either would have, will🤞🏽, or did end up with husbands who are the loves of their lives, I always come with receipts, check the links for the context)

You: But Eddie’s not bi or pan. Think about Shannon.

Me: Okay, then, let’s talk, and think, about Chrissie and Shannon. Take Chrissie, combine her with Rebecca, forget about all of their scheming (and Robert’s), completely ignore the fact that Lachlan is a fucking psychopath/every thing about Lachlan except that he exists as part of Robert’s prior attempt to dismiss his actual sexuality of bisexuality and his attraction to Aaron, also forget that Seb started out as an ill-thought-of plot device (to say the very least), morph those two extremely different, white with a capital W, White boys Robert was/is a father to in to one kid, make the kid even more perfect and precious than Seb already is, and tell me that you’re not left with the British, and completely white and able-bodied, Shannon and Christopher.

You: But--

Me: EDDIE LITERALLY CHECKED OUT BUCK’S ASS ON CAMERA WITH SUCH BLATANCY THAT CHIMNEY OBVIOUSLY NOTICED AND IT👏🏽 WAS👏🏽 NOT👏🏽 CUT👏🏽 FROM👏🏽 THE👏🏽 SCENE👏🏽!!! OPEN YOUR EYES! THAT INTENTIONALLY HAPPENED!

{I was going to just do a cropped version of just Eddie, Buck, and Chimney, but, when I went to make it, I couldn’t help but think that Hen looks like she is thinking that she doesn’t need to see what’s going on to know, and she does know, and that you can even kind of see the knowing smile that we’ve come to be so familiar with during ‘Buddie’ moments on Bobby’s face, even from this back/side stance of his head [don’t make me do yet an other separate post just on that, Bobby Nash/Peter Krause is the actual, and literal (in Bobby’s case), Captain of this ship, I will do it]. To quote @nyx-ic in response to me saying “We basically already know that the rest of the station has a bet on them,” “Every time I see that head!canon I cackle because it’s just fact now. The only debate is whether it’s Hen or Bobby who wins it,” and I’ll add that Chimney doesn’t care about the money. He just wants his future brother-in-law to be happy with their mutual co-worker and, as he’s betting, his future brother-in-law’s future husband. ... Also, Buck doesn’t need to be moving like this while standing in one place, resulting in the foregone conclusion of his ass jiggling, even he seems to know what’s happening behind him. Look at that face!}

Now, in all seriousness, let’s move on to the cropped version:

LOOK!!! LOOK AT IT! ... That is definitely eyes on ass!, there is NO EXPLANATION for the expression that rolls down Chimney’s face other than that of a friend seeing some one doing some thing that they know would embarrass the person, but they, themselves, think that it’s cute, and don’t want them catching on that they saw the thing, and, in the middle, is a man who is certain that his ass is being checked out, and IS HAPPY ABOUT IT!!!!! THIS IS THE ENTIRE MERE 24 FRAMES* (updated from a previous version) (1 SECOND!) FROM THIS CAMERA ANGLE (when they could have just stayed on Bobby’s/Peter’s full-body grin!)!!! WHY DID IT MAKE IT TO AIR IF NOT TO SERVE A NECESSARY PURPOSE?!!!!!!!!!!

“You don’t find it, son, you make it” - Thomas, “Buck, Actually”. What are they MAKING here if not Buddie?!

Buddie shippers aren’t reaching. We’re sitting back and pointing.

(I’ve been laughing to myself since Wednesday afternoon in waiting to be able to post this)

... I’ll just be over here joyfully awaiting the ironic, yet all-too-fitting, name change of Evan ‘Buck’ Diaz with my clown wig on.

[trying-to-get-somewhere-real]

To ring, or not to ring? That is the question...

Hello Vanity fam. I have seen a bit of renewed discussion recently both on here and on Twitter about fandom’s desire for Vanessa to give Charity an engagement ring. And look, I get why that is appealing to people: we haven’t seen many grand gestures from Vanessa, and the idea of her articulating exactly why she loves Charity and wants to spend the rest of her life with her is very attractive. If it happens, I won’t be mad or anything. However, for me, it’s not necessary, and I wanted to put forth a few reasons why I think Vanessa not giving Charity a ring is actually a very powerful thing.

1.      Charity has received fancy rings before, from men who treated her like garbage in the end. And for me, the foundational principal of Vanity is: Vanessa is different, in every possible way you could imagine. I don’t know if the writers actually intended for Vanessa’s lack of ring/proposal for Charity to further symbolize how fundamentally different she is from all of Charity’s past lovers, but for me, it does. That Vanessa is giving only herself to Charity—and not a fancy, expensive object—to demonstrate her commitment, is beautiful and romantic. Especially when Charity already knows well what Vanessa’s steadfast partnership looks like; how valuable it is. The show has insinuated that the reason for the ring omission could be that Charity has done this several times before, and therefore the wedding logistics/rings/etc. aren’t so much the point for her now, but I think it more generally speaks volumes about the fact that what Vanessa gives Charity is utterly unique, and cannot be encompassed by an object. Which leads me to reason #2…

2.      Vanessa is the first person to understand Charity’s love language, and it isn’t gifts, and it isn’t even really words. It has taken a long time for Charity to get to a place where she recognizes what she actually needs from a romantic partner: actions. In particular, being steady, calm, dependable, patient, and staying when Charity does her Charity!Things that always drive people away. Of course, I think Charity has brought so many unique things to Vanessa’s life: fun, a real family, a deep understanding of herself sexually, and so much joy, just to name a few, and hearing Vanessa articulate some or all of those things would be like fanfic come to life. BUT, I think it’s just as powerful, if not more so, for Vanessa to demonstrate her love for Charity by continuing to show up for her. Because no one else ever has.

2(a).       One caveat to 2: Charity’s seeming disbelief that Vanessa actually loves her—as evidenced during the break up reunion—did give me pause about whether Vanessa needs to at least say, “I love you,” more often. Ultimately, however, I think Charity asked, “You love me?” as they were about to reunite because she assumed that Vanessa stopped loving her due to her lies and not because Vanessa did not say it enough while they were together. Moreover, I’m not sure that anything Vanessa does or doesn’t say can single-handedly make Charity feel sufficiently loved—at bottom, Charity doesn’t think she’s lovable because so many people have told her she isn’t, and it’s going to take more than a few years (if ever, honestly) for Vanessa to permanently undo that damage. I think her staying is much more powerful in that regard than any specific words.

3.      On a personal note, I am married, but I don’t have an engagement ring. Neither does my wife. Our wedding bands have in-laid diamonds, which we love! Spending money on engagement rings was not a priority for us, but it is for many, which is great. One of the liberating things about gay weddings is that you are free from the constraints of social conventions, because none exist. Two engagement rings is it’s own form of defying convention, which is probably why it is attractive to many people. (including this fandom?) I would have no problem if Vanity wanted to have two rings. But the point is, I like (and feel represented by) Vanity’s choices to do whatever feels right to them. No pressure, no expectations. This wedding, and everything surrounding it, is just for them. It feels very queer to me.

[suggers-got-dingled]

‪Robert is a little bastard but no longer the self-absorbed bastard he once was before he found a new lease of life and reformed into a man who no longer thinks materialism and power comes before family and genuine love. He’s a bastard for breaking my heart. For being so selflessly wise. For proving just how far he’s come over those five years of learning curves and development and finding his purpose through the man that took all that past repressed suffering away and allowed him to be who he is today (and don’t even get me started on it being a direct parallel for the anniversary of the day he officially came out and told said man he just wants to be true to himself and live a free and happy life with him!)

Robert knew he was going to hand himself as soon as he saw how much this was affecting Aaron and yet he still boosted his spirits by typically teasing, making him laugh, giving him hope, painting the perfect picture of the future life Aaron’s mapped out, reassuring him they’re going to be just fine together. He promised him he’ll get the best life. He held him tight. He told him he loves him, always. He handed him the watch which was a token of their eternal love. All without letting Aaron know it’s his final pledge to always put him first. He literally affirmed he’d rather live out his every day no matter what it brings living his best life with his soulmate and yet he still did what he did because he’s giving up his own needs for Aaron’s. It was the ultimate sacrifice. The proof nothing matters to him but his love and care for Aaron. Wholesome growth on a plate. 

The egotistical, bitter, calculating Robert who entered that village in 2014 would’ve done whatever it took to save himself and now he’s leaving the same village doing everything possible for the people he loves. He loves and worships Aaron so deeply and that much he’d rather let him go than put him through another taxing life on the run and that’s an utmost testament to this wonderful, multifaceted, iconic character who will live on through the hearts of everyone who’s had their own lives firmly altered by that bi disaster with the smug grin, blonde hair and leather jacket. ❤️‬