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[johnnydany]

Just A Girl who Loves Elephants Funny Elephant Lovers T-Shirt

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[dunyabariscetin]

("Mandala Pesign Purple Elephant Oil Painting" Classic T-Shirt for Sale by Dunya Baris Cetin gönderdi)

[aouiaa]

Check Up

Outline: Trouble in paradise? Go to marriage counseling! They’ll teach you the ins and outs! *wink wink*

Word count: 830

Warnings: MINORS DNI — SMUT AHEAD + Dom! Abby + Sub! Reader + Smut with little plot + Roleplaying + A refers to R as “Miss Harding” + Fingering

“You want me to be what?” you laugh nervously with some shock underlying it.

A sigh of regret mixed with embarrassment of her request caused Abby to sit down on the bed, bringing her hand to rub her eyes, “You know what, never mind.”

“No, no, I want to too but it was…just out of the blue.” you say while sitting down beside Abby and placing your hand on her shoulder.

It’s her request that brings back past events when your marriage counselor suggested that you and Abby should “explore each other’s fantasy, to better learn about one another” was a shocker to the two of you. Definitely not what you expected going into counseling, but here you are assigned with homework to, “explore each other.” God was the duration of your ride home lingering with awkwardness. All you could really think about was what the women said after assigning the homework, “Your partner can still always surprise you.”

When the two of you got home, words were barely exchanged until now. Confronting the elephant in the bedroom. Abby was taking her shirt off while you were taking yours off as well when she said it.

“You know what I was thinking?” she says, throwing her shirt in the hamper, leaving her in her undershirt.

An acknowledged hum comes out of you as you struggle to take off your blouse. “Hm? And what is that?”

“I was thinking…” she trails off, her voice sounding more prominent as she walks over to your side of the bed, lifting her hand up to help free the last pesky button which causes you to look up. “…about what the counselor said.” her voice sounding low and soft with every breath wasted on each word leaves a sudden shiver down your spine.

“About the roleplaying?” you inquire.

“Mhm, about the roleplaying. And I was thinking it would be really hot if you were a patient coming into my office for a check up.” she says.

And that’s how you ended up here, with your wife knuckles deep in your cunt. A moan slips your lips as you look up at her now darkened blue eyes. Her fingers pumping in and out of you deliciously which elicits your back to arch off the bed, “Oh abby—“

“Dr. Anderson.” she reprimands with a pause to curl her fingers into your g-spot which causes you to yelp, bucking your hips.

“Dr. Anderson…”

Her last name leaving your lips, the one you so proudly have now once you married her has her underwear soaked. Seeing you in this state because of her only worses it. “Yeah, I’ll have you leaving my office all better up, miss…Harding.” she says, kissing and sucking bruises into your neck which further your overwhelming pleasure.

“Or maybe I won’t. So you can keep coming back here. And be my favorite patient…Yeah?” She smirks, feeling your gummy walls hug around her fingers at the expense of her lewd words. “Yeah, you’d like that a lot, wouldn’t you?”

“Ye-Yes, Doctor Anderson.” you let out a shuddered moan, “Yes…I would love that.”

“Mmm, good girl.”

All her dirty words only bring you closer to the precipice of your climax. And with the way she knew your body like the back of her hand. You weren’t gonna last long with her heaven sent fingers stretching you out perfectly, pumping in and out, and curling into your g-spot. And don’t get yourself start on her carefully calculated movements, how fast she knows to go to make you see the stars. She is a doctor after all. Anatomy is her thing.

“Oh, Doctor—Fuck!—I’m—“ you’re cut off by your own release. Your head falling back on the plush of your pillow. Your heavy breathing followed by the soft ticklish smooches of Abby kissing your neck to your jaw while slowly removing her fingers which makes you whimper at loss and watch her bring her fingers to her mouth to taste you on her tongue.

She moans at the taste of you before looking back at you with a smirk. “Well miss harding..” she jesters with a chuckle. “You made quite the mess, but that can be addressed upon your departure.”

“Oh yeah?” you respond, breathy.

“Mhm, and how do you rate your visit today, miss harding?” she says, not able to contain the smile begging to spread, and leans down to kiss you.

“Quite a ride, Dr. Anderson.” you say in between kisses, giggling.

“A good one?”

“Uhm yeah! A ‘we should definitely try this again’ one.” you chuckle, cupping Abby’s face to kiss her once more.

A soft laugh leaves Abby’s lips as she looks down at you, her expression seeming to soften. “I love you.” She speaks in a quieter tone.

And maybe in that moment, you can thank your counselor instead of constantly insulting her, in your head of course. Because she was right about one thing. Your partner can definitely still surprise you.

“I love you too, abs.”

a/n; Got this idea in the shower. Yeah, I’m 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴𝔂 like that…

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[regressionschool]

little women: dino diapers 

The sunlight streams into the room, casting playful shadows on the pastel walls of the nursery. You hold the envelope in your hand, the official seal glinting in the light, its contents declaring a new chapter for Valerie. Her classification as a Little is now complete, and with it, a delightful transition that she has both dreaded and longed for. "Guess what came in the mail today, Valerie?" you chirp as you enter the room, waving the envelope with a flourish.

Valerie looks up from her plush dinosaur, a blush spreading across her cheeks as she catches the hint of mischief in your eyes. She's seated right in the middle of her play mat, surrounded by soft toys and picture books, dressed in a snug white T-shirt with a cute pink unicorn on it, her diaper peeking out. "Is it... is it my...?" Her words trail off, the anticipation making her fidget with the hem of her shirt.

"Yes, it's official now!" you announce, tearing open the envelope and pulling out the document. "You’re officially a Little. And you know what that means, right?“ Her eyes widen as the realization dawns on her, her lips parting slightly, but no words come out. She simply nods, her hands nervously playing with the edge of her pacifier.

"It means no more pretending to be a big girl," you say as you walk over to her dresser and pull open the bottom drawer, revealing a collection of colorful panties, adorned with playful prints of animals and fruits. "It’s time to say goodbye to these.“ One by one, you hold them up, teasing her gently. "I mean, were these really big girl panties?" you laugh, showing off a pair printed with little elephants. "Or these with the cherries? Pretty sure these are for littles anyway!"

Valerie giggles, covering her face with her hands, peeking through her fingers. The moment is light, her embarrassment mixed with excitement. Then, you reach the back of the drawer, pulling out a few lacy thongs, the only remnants of her previous adult life. "And what about these?" you tease, waggling them before her eyes. Her face turns a deeper shade of red, and a playful spark lights up her eyes.

"Let’s cut these up too, huh?" you suggest, handing her the scissors. With a mischievous grin, Valerie takes the scissors, cutting through the lacy fabric. Each snip is like a ceremonial farewell to her past, and with each piece that falls to the floor, her smile grows wider.

Finally, everything is cut up, the pieces scattered like confetti. You help her up, and she stands in front of you, her eyes shining with joy. She adjusts her diaper and then pops her pacifier back into her mouth, her voice muffled but clear.

"From now on, I wear diapers everywhere," she declares through her pacifier, a declaration of her new start.

[radiansjort]

BEST PARTS OF 2024 OLYMPICS (as someone in the US)

all the buzz around the cardboard beds. idk why the whole idea is so funny 💀

lebron hoisting that flag like george washington crossing the delaware. him and coco were perfect picks for flag bearers fr

POMMEL HORSE GUY. mr clark kent who got picked for the men’s gymnastics team JUST FOR THAT ONE EVENT, showed up, served cunt, and ensured us their first men’s gym medal in 16 years. stephen nedoroscik you will forever be iconic. (the whole team really— i also love seeing fred richards’ parents reactions LMAO)

THE USA WOMENS RUGBY TEAM 🗣️ being down 5 with 7 seconds left to go COAST TO COAST TO SCORE AND WIN THE BRONZE FOR THE FIRST US WOMENS MEDAL IN RUGBY!!! also ilona maher you will forever be iconic. 

flavia saraiva falling in warmups and being like ok bet, slaps a band aid on her black eye and goes out to help brazil win their FIRST MEDAL IN WOMENS GYM OHHH YEAHHH

GUATEMALA EARNED THEIR SECOND MEDAL EVER 🔥🔥🔥‼️‼️GRACIAS JEAN PIERRE BROL CARDENAS 🗣️🗣️🇬🇹🇬🇹🇬🇹🥉LOS CHAPINES FTW ‼️(if it weren’t for the new bib number rule instead of a shootout we could’ve gotten higher but i digress 😔)

THE WOMENS GYMNASTICS TEAM EATS ONCE AGAIN. 🐐🐐🐐

kim yeji’s AURA???!??? she came out there and shot with her hand in her pocket like she graduated from the university of servington, which she did, all while holding her daughters toy elephant 🥹

suni lee’s, simone biles’, and brody malone’s comeback stories were all so heartwarming to see, especially rebeca andrade’s coming back after THREE ACL TEARS?!!?

henrik christiansen (aka muffin guy) is literally so funny 😭🙏 bro actually has SO. MANY. tiktoks about the olympics village chocolate muffins and i give all credit to him for the fact we have the recipe now 😋

GUATEMALA WINNING ITS FIRST GOLD 🥇🥇🥇 ADRIANA RUANO 🐐🐐 PRIMER BRONCE Y AHORA ORO 🥉🥇🇬🇹🇬🇹🇬🇹🔥🔥🔥‼️‼️‼️🗣️🗣️🗣️

that turkish guy who just came out there in a t shirt and rawdogged the olympics 😭😭 imagine doing the shooting event with no eyewear, no ear covers, and just eyeballing it and winning SILVER??? bro is a hit man tryna not be suspicious by winning gold 🤨🤨

snoop dogg just chilling?? bro is participating in trials, trading pins, going to like every event and cheering, wearing FULL equestrian gear with martha stewart 😭? watching skateboarding finals w tony hawk? my guy is on the side quest of all side quests

katie ledecky my GOAT 🐐. i always love seeing her as the only swimmer on screen!! she lowkey has time to get out of the pool, do some interviews, get a snack, and come back to watch second place finish fr 

i do not usually watch cycling but i got so sad when remco evenepoel’s bike broke down BUT he had such a. huge lead he STILL MANAGED TO WIN GOLD!!! 🔥🔥

loving all the countries making history with their first medals!! julian alfred (st. lucia) and thea lafond (dominica) SHOWING UP FR!! also a lot of countries got their first medals in gymnastics specifically like kaylia neymour (algeria), carlos yulo (philippines), ángel barajas (colombia), etc. LIKE OKAYY THE GYMNASTS ARE NOT HERE TO PLAY

all the noah lyles haters been real quiet after he won gold in 100m 🤫🤫

the french pole vaulter who LOST because his peanits was too big. LIKE??!!?? sure you have a big wiener but at the cost of LOSING THE OLYMPCIS LMFAOOO

the women’s balance beam podium was so cute 😭😭 the two italians, alice d’amato and manila esposito, biting their medals together, and zhou yaqin from china looks over and does it too 🥹

armand duplantis hit the turkish hitman celly after breaking the pole vaulting wr AGAIN and winning gold 😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨 tuff. he actually built different cuz tell me why he’s broken the wr LIKE EIGHT TIMES IN A ROW???

YEAHH BRAZIL BEAT FRANCE AND SPAIN EVEN WHEN THE REFS WERE TRYING SOOO HARD TO MAKE EM LOSE ‼️ like they were NOT slick we could tell 🤨

bro the figure skaters from beijing 2022 FINALLY getting their medals like??? i really took two years for the IOC to investigate? okay. AT LEAST THEYRE FINALLY GETTING THE BAG H 🗣️🗣️

imane khelif getting a gold despite ALL THE SHIT BEING THROWN AT HER‼️ she faced all these brain dead critics yet came out to win it, and saying without her haters the win wouldn’t have been so satisfying??? QUEEN SHIT 👑👑

women’s soccer SLAYED SO HARD. like i’ve seen enough build the alyssa naeher statue. that shootout against sweden awakened that dawg in her and she LOCKED IN. 

men’s and women’s basketball wins over france 🔥 imagine being the host country and both ur basketball teams go to the gold medal match just TO LOSE TO THE SAME COUNTRY LLL

usa winning the most medals 🔥💪 they not like U.S. fr 

shoutout to that guy who tried to climb the eiffel tower without ropes at the closing ceremony 😔✊ arrested before he could achieve greatness 🕊️🕊️🕊️

[smellss]

Close quarters

Summary: Never has sharing a bed been so difficult

Warning: australian colloquialism/phrases (swearing soz not soz) and unedited uni is killing me :)

A long long night for the Matilda's, a wonderful game, the longest penalty shoot out in World Cup history. Y/n had never felt so proud to be alongside these women. Well most of them anyways, her feelings towards her Captain still remained unsolved.

Never had a single person frustrated her in her whole life, of course she respected her she's Sam Kerr for god sakes she had to. But that arrogance god, it frustrated her to no means.

Her smirk, her flirty winks and that tongue.

Wait what ew not like that

The way she smugly stuck it out after her goals, it made it her feel something.

Yes how exactly did it make me feel.

That's what Y/n was trying to discover using her vodka and soda as an accomplice on her journey. However, it was still World Cup and she couldn't get too crazy, just one celebratory drink.

Sitting with Hailey at the bar they discussed the game at length her other team mates surrounded around the pool table taking turns with one another. A new tactic of cool down their coaches had suggested as a bonding exercise.

Y/n felt a gaze on her from across the room but when she turned they were gone.

"You alright chicky?" Haley brushed her arm, a concerned frown rippling across her forehead. Y/n smiled at the term of endearment vigorously nodding.

"Just tired that's all, I might head up to the rooms" she yawned, finishing the last sip of her drink. However, just as she stood up two hotel staff came into the bar area.

"Ladies we have an unfortunate announcement to make, due to a leak in our pipe system a few of the rooms we had set aside for you have been damaged by water. Not to worry however, all of your belongings were fine" A few groans, moans and sighs were heard around the room.

"Not to worry girls, we have assigned you roommates to share with based off your positions, a bonding exercise if you will" Your coach chuckled slightly.

Perfect I'll be assigned with Hailey

"Arnold and Kennedy" both woman laughed like 13 year olds sharing a room at camp, walking off to their room.

I cannot believe I am getting an assigned room at 27

"L/N, Kerr is coming to join you" Y/n swear she felt her heart fall out of her arse. She looked over at Kerr who had a mischievous glint in her eye, saluting at her coach with that signature cheeky smile.

You both walked out of the room in silence, Hailey giving you a reassuring smile and thumbs up.

I really hope I can fall asleep quickly

Y/n heard a knock on the door she quickly rushed over opening it hastily.

"Hey roomie" Sam slightly slurred obviously not obeying the one celebratory drink rule, she glided past Y/n, taking in her room and belongings. Spending a long time looking at Y/n's photos she'd brought from home.

"Are these your siblings?" Sam half smiled, glazing over the photo she held it up towards the light.

"Yes, my brother and sister" Y/n stated proudly, extremely grateful of her wonderful supportive family.

Y/n noticed a change in Sam's demeanour once she saw the photo of her and Hailey at the season wrap up party last year. Sam's brow now furrowed as she walked away placing her things down.

Finally she turned around and faced Y/n, drinking in her appearance and forming a very large smile.

"Cute pjs L/n" Y/n quickly flushed a bright shade of red completely forgetting she was in her big Chelsea shirt and matching sweats.

"They were a gift actually, besides I don't know if you can be giving me much heat in those" Y/n quickly retaliated eyeing Sam's kangaroo and koala pj set. She gasped placing a hand on her chest pretending to be offended.

"Well I usually sleep in boxers and no shirt but I thought we'd keep it PG for our first sleep over" She winked, Y/n turning a shade of red she didn't even know was possible.

Both girls turned to face the bed, the one king mattress quickly becoming the elephant in the room.

"Ill take the couch" they both said in unison.

"You were on field longer tonight you deserve the rest more" Sam argued to the best of her slightly intoxicated abilities.

"You're team captain and recovering from injury you're taking it" Y/n retaliated

Sam shook her head, "Lets just share we are teammates, its just fucking bed".

She slipped in the bed switching her beside lamp off, a yawn escaping her she closed her eyes. Y/n stood their hesistantly.

"Y/n come on, I don't bite" The girl sighed slowly sliding in to their shared bed, turning off her bedside lamp, with now only having the light glow of Brisbane CBD shining through their windows.

Y/n could feel her heart beating in her ears.

The silence of the room was killing her.

Everything was so still.

It was as if time was frozen.

Why is this affecting me so much God, just go to sleep Y/n

The only source of comfort to Y/n was the feeling of Sam also tossing and turning, until she stopped facing Y/n's back.

"Psst, Y/n are you awake still?" Sam whispered

Both girls turned now facing one another. Sam feeling y/n's breath softly in hale and exhale.

"Yes Kerr what is it?"

"I just wanted to know...how long have you and Russo been together?" Sam hesitated, her breath tightly in her throat waiting for the response.

"What?" Y/n laughed tears nearly forming in her eyes, "Sam we are not together just very good friends"

"Oh,oh but you must have someone back home" The captain pried more.

"Nope just me" Y/n whispered, Sam's eye intently staring over her face trying to read her expression.

The room was hot, Y/n had never felt so tense she felt like she was melting. She suddenly felt a hand on her cheek, a thumb brushed over eye an eyelash stuck on Sam's thumb.

"Make a wish" Sam whispered, holding out her thumb. Y/n blew it away, Sam's hand now back on her cheek.

"Please don't kill me for this" Sam gently moving y/n's face towards hers.

Their lips slowly interlocking, the warmth flowed through Y/n like nothing ever had before. It felt like her body had finally switched on and every nerve had been sent into overdrive.

Sam's lips sweetly tasting like her strawberry chapstick and minty toothpaste. Sam smiled into the kiss breaking it apart.

"You've had no idea how long I wanted to do that for" Sam smiled stroking Y/n's hair.

I think I know what the feeling is now.

"Oh I might have some idea" she challenged back.

EXTRA:

"Macca I swear to god if you ruin this I'm going to fuck you up" Alannah whisper yelled

"One more shot" Mackenzie hushed leaning over the bed

The girls of course knew this was going to happen and were prepared rightfully so to document the occasion.

Both Y/n and their captain were entangled in one another looking as content as could possibly be.

"Mary you owe me that $15 babe" Hailey grinned

"No way", Mary scoffed hushing everyone out the door "I said August you owe me $40".

"Still worth it" Hailey smiled looking one more time at the couple before leaving them in peace.

[donotpush]

Bumpin' in Europe, 2

second part is here. it's been quite a while, so you might want to check part 1 here :) ALSO, some anons have sent asks with suggestions and stuff about the story, just know that i write them all down and i'll keep them in mind for the future ;)

“Yeah. Just tired. And hot. I mean, it's hot in here…”

So hot in here. You finally spoke, able to spit out a few cohesive words before cleaning your throat as your eyes wandered around the room, avoiding the woman in front of you. A safe one, talk about the weather.

“I haven't seen you in years! You’re all grown up now…” Monica said. “Your mom doesn’t really tells me much about you, but she’s right when she says you’re good looking”

Okay, you know what? There was nothing out of the ordinary in saying the truth, telling her she looked good, right? Everyone loved a compliment from time to time, and being kind was always cool.

“I look different, yeah. But you…” your words lingered in the air, and you waved your hand once again, this time pointing at her middle, tilting your head to emphasize the point. “You look different. I mean, you look amazing… congratulations on the baby.”

She got the point, and the ghost of a smile lingered on her lips for a moment before she looked down at her middle, her hand rubbing her stomach mindlessly. At least the elephant in the room was gone.

“Uh? You mean this?” Looking up at you, she frowned. “Oh. No, I'm not pregnant.”

You lifted your gaze from where it was fixed on the floor, and you swear you could almost feel the color draining from your face as your eyebrows raised and you stammered. Then, she laughed, throwing her head back.

“Just kidding, don't worry” she breathed, “Oh, look at you, poor thing. Of course I'm pregnant…”

Walking next to you with a promptitude that surprised you, all smooth and almost graceful movements, she leaned to grab a mug from the shelf on top of you. Standing on her tiptoes to reach Monica let out a small gasp as she did a visible effort to reach. Her shirt lifted, revealing a bit of her belly that was now right next to your face, and you found yourself with your eyes locked on the sink in front of you as if it were the most interesting thing in the room.

As she moved back, her hand rested on your shoulder for support before she briefly caressed your cheek with a reassuring laugh before she walked back towards the sink.

“Terribly pregnant…” she glanced at you over her shoulder before turning sideways and patting her stomach gently. “Twins, actually. Want some coffee?”

She dropped the fact as if it was nothing, an everyday thing. But you already knew that that was twins, you were just waiting for the official confirmation, and you couldn't help but bite your lip slightly at the thought.

“You and the father must be excited,” you said, trying to sound casual and failing miserably. It came out more like a question than anything else. “You both are, right? I mean… kid's always a blessing or whatever."

“Out of the picture,” she clicked her tongue, raising her eyebrows, but the tone was nonchalant. “In fact, I’m not even sure who the father is. Not that I care either way”. She paused for half a second before continuing, her fingers caressing distractedly her stomach, "We're fine as we are. They say three's a crowd".

Oh. For you, that only meant two things. First, Monica wasn’t taken. Not understandable. Who wouldn’t want to marry a woman like that?

And second, the way her tone was light and her face remained straight, free from all shame or from trying to keep a fake modesty as she spoke about who the baby’s daddy was, made you think that she was as sexually liberated as she looked.

Not like she would lack any chances of having a satisfactory sexual life. Even right now, with that heavily pregnant frame that seemed to be the only thing you could notice about her, you doubted she lacked admirers.

Men, women, you were sure she didn’t lack people that would want to share a bed with this woman.

With the last phrase, she turned to look over her shoulder to wink at you. A smirk played upon her lips before she looked away, bending over to pick up a bunch of bed sheets, and you stared at the back of her legs for a moment, your eyes wandering over to her ass.

"Oh, Monica, don't bother," you snapped out of your dumbfounded state as you rushed up to her, ready to help. “Let me take this." You grabbed two bundles of bedsheets from her arms, and after a moment of hesitation, she nodded silently in approval.

“Ah, darling, that's alright, I do love working on my own… but thank you,” She smiled back as she started walking towards the guest bedroom, with you following behind. "As much as I try to deny it, it's been getting harder and harder with this always on the way," she motioned towards the gravid bulge of her stomach. "Good thing you're here. Could use some help with a few things…" she finished, biting her lip and getting lost in thought for a moment.

You nodded slowly, letting out a small chuckle and scratching the side of your neck. The sound made you cringe internally. Well, at least you were having fun this far.

You helped her to tidy the bedroom a bit and soon you had a far better place to sleep than a room shared with a bunch of strangers.

You found yourself admiring the view outside as the sun started to set behind the mountains in the distance. The heat was starting to die down, but there was still that smell of summertime in the air, and you didn't remember the last time you sat outside like this.

"You will like it here" Monica interrupted your thoughts, startling you. "I know it seems a bit boring. But you have the beach, the food is great… you can go clubbing. There's a lot of people your age around."

You took the glass of lemonade in your hand and pressed it against your neck, leaning back into the chair before turning to stare at the woman.

She took a sip of her own drink, and you watched as she placed the glass on top of her protuberant stomach. Your breath caught in your throat as she leaned back distractedly, and lifted her shirt, placing the glass against the bare skin of her belly.

Monica sighed contently, her eyes closing, and you followed the trajectory of a drop of sweat from the glass that slid down her abdomen, running over her belly button before it disappeared on her waistline.

"So" she exhaled, turning to look at you. "What plans do you have for tonight?"

[heterophobicdyke]

That kthulu woman literally is married to a male and has a kid with him and has whined before about how he's "allowed" to go out at night and spend time with his friends and hobbies and have fun while she has to stay at home taking care of the kid lmao she should be the last one defending het partnerships but I guess she needs that copium. If you tell her something though she will defend him by saying he does more chores around the house than her since she's disabled... alright sis. And last time I visited her blog she announced she was pregnant with a second child lmao soon she will have no time to argue with lesbians on the internet thanks to her useless man god bless

This is why if I didn’t try to normalise non-lesbian “radical” women living celibate/febfem lives for women to properly gain traction on the feminist movement then I’d not be a radical feminist. Me doing so is *because* I’m not leaving radical feminism for heterosexual women to own it and make it libfem again.

I left for a few years because I just couldn’t be bothered with the waste of energy on how bad men are for “radical feminist” women, not just for us individually but as a movement, while they refuse to leave them. Like sure if you’re actually in a threatening situation and can’t leave then that’s different but you aren’t. You love him so much, the moment people start questioning why you stay.

I left because of the hypocrisy - they call TIFs traitors for identifying as men, despite most TIFs being gnc lesbians and forming dysphoria from being treated like they’re a man their entire lives, while they think it’s misogyny to even have their male/female relationships questioned through a radical feminist lens.

I left because if the main objective of radical feminism is a re-ordering of society to eliminate patriarchy and male supremacy, why do we focus so much on what lesbians do in bed? How much lesbians are apparently “so manly” for being sexual - and when lesbians internalise that homophobia and identify as men they’re class traitors?

I now focus on how radical feminist actions align with a “re-ordering of society to eliminate patriarchy and male supremacy.” So, with that in mind, depriving men of sex and romance is literally number one - until they clean their act up. I’m anti-makeup, but whether a woman wears makeup or not is not stopping the radical re-ordering of patriarchal society. Not in any meaningful ways. That’s a reaction to patriarchy, not what necessarily perpetuates it. It’s a cope.

Men need to have less power in society for a re-ordering. So more women need to stop ironing men’s shirts for work, need to stop taking care of his kids while he builds the wealth (and is the only one to have financial literacy), need to stop depending on men for any kind of support, and need to deny them anything else that keeps his class in the powerful position. Because men abuse power. As Jenny Holzer says, “it comes as no surprise.”

After 16 years around radical feminism I’m tired of the venting circles and microanalysing meaningless things women do like paint their nails for whether it’s feminist or not. How about the elephant in the room? The male/female relationships? Let’s get fucking real about how and when women provide men with power that they don’t deserve. Women aren’t angry enough. Radical feminism IS the angry woman’s feminism.

[soccer-love]

Spontaneous

Maxi Rall x reader

“Does it hurt?” I ask my fingertips carefully tracing over the lines of the tattoo on her arm, my head resting on her stomach. 

“Maybe a little in the beginning, but after some time you don't really feel it anymore.” she explains, softly caressing my hair. 

I love the summer in Munich but right now the temperatures are somewhere around 35 degrees celsius (95 Fahrenheit) and at night, it barley cools down, so we decided to sleep on the mattress on the balcony of our shared apartment. 

Maxi is reading some book and I tried to also focus on a book I wanted to read but its too hot so I just lay there and do nothing except thinking. 

I love her tattoos, I always did. And I thought about getting one. 

“I want to get one too.” I say and she looks at me again, putting her book down. 

“Where?” she asks and starts to play with my hair, a thing she often does without realizing it.  

“On my upper arm maybe.” I explain and she nods. 

“Have you thought about a design yet?” 

“Do you remember the elephant I showed you, that my dad always draw for me when I was a little? I think I want this.” I explain. 

“Yeah, you have them as your phone background.” she answers and I turn on my side, one arm over her. 

“Would you come with me?” 

“Of curse.” she softly, rubs her thump over my cheek. 

I love how soft her hands are. 

“Thanks.” I say and lean over, leaving a kiss on her nose. 

Maxi giggles, softly running her hand through my hair. 

“Can you give me a real kiss?” 

“Oh so you think these aren't real kisses?” I ask and place a kiss on her cheek, then one on her temple and again one on her cheek. 

Before I can say or do anything she wraps her arms around my shoulders, pulling me down and kissing me. 

“I like all of your kisses but your lips on mine are my favorite thing.” she says and I feel this warm feeling in my heart, I love her so fucking much. 

I roll off of her and lay down next to her. 

Maxi grabs her phone and I see her searching something but I can't read what it is. 

“Incase you want to get your tattoo within the next days, there is a tattoo shop just a couple of streets away that has walk in night on the weekends.” she says and I sit up. 

“Today is Friday, right. And technically Friday is a night of the weekend.” 

Maxi nods and I stand up. 

“Then lets go, I want to get a tattoo today.” I say and hold out my hand for her. 

Maxi laughs but grabs my hand and I pull her up. 

“I love it when you have this spontaneous moments.” she says and I look up, she's around five inches taller than me. 

“I’m not that spontaneous.” Maxi shakes her head laughing. 

“Oh no...well you asked me to move in with you, in the middle of making out.” she reminds me and I feel my cheeks getting red. 

To be honest, it was like that, we were in her apartment, somewhere in between kissing and getting rid of each others shirts, when I pulled back and asked her to move in with me. 

“But I didn't made that decision that fast, I was thinking about way longer before I asked.” I explain. 

“Love it though.” she says and leans down to kiss me. 

“Then let's go.” I grab her hand and pull her towards the door. 

Grabbing my phone and wallet on the way. 

“Chill babe.” 

Hand in hand we walk outside and down the street to the tattoo shop. 

Therese a women sitting at the front test and she gives us a big smile as we walk in. 

“Hey you two, how can I help you?” she asks and I can see her eyes flickering the the tattoo on Maxis arm. 

“I wanna get a tattoo.” I say and she nods, getting up. 

“Great, I’m Angela but Angie is completely fine.” 

“Y/N.” I say

“Maxi.” 

“Nice to meet you two, come with me please.” 

Angie leads us into a room in the back of the shop. 

“Am I right that this is your first tattoo?” she asks and I nod. 

“Yeah.” 

“Cool, just sit down.” she says pointing to a blue couch while she sits down at the small desk. 

“Do you have thought about the place where you want it and the design yet?” Angie asks turning towards us. 

“Yes, on my left upper arm.” I say and pull out my phone to show her the drawing of the elephant. 

“That looks really good, if you want we can start right now.” she explains and I nod excited. 

“Great, you can sit down at already.” she adds and I get up to sit down at the tattoo chair, while she explains some things to us about tattoos. 

Angie prints out some papers I have to sign before she starts drawing the lines of the tattoo on my arm. Maxi is sitting on my other side, smiling down at me. 

“So I’m gonna start now, it will hurt but just try to focus on your breathing or on something else okay? You can also talk to me or Maxi if it helps you.” Angie says and I nod. 

“Okay then lets go.” as the needle first touches my skin I bite my lip in pain. 

“Can I hold your hand?” Maxi softly asks like she's the one getting a tattoo. 

“Yes.” I say and she places her hand on mine, so I can squeeze it. 

Maxi leans her forehead against mine, giving me a smile. 

“You’re really cool for doing this.” she whispers and I feel her thumb rubbing over the back of my hand. 

“To be honest you two are a really cute couple.” Angie says as she pauses and wipes over the tattoo lines with a towel. 

“Thanks.” Maxi says, the smile on her face growing wider. 

I love that whenever someone tells us that we’re a cute couple or someone talks about me with her, she always gets this big smile on her face, looking incredible proud. 

It takes about twenty minutes for her to finish the tattoo and when she's done I’m incredibly happy. 

“I love it.” I say and Angie smiles. 

While I pay for it she tells me some more about how I should clean it and when it gets red or hurts that I should come back. 

“Well thank you for coming by and have a great night you two.” Angie says as she leads us back to the front door. 

“Thanks to you.” I say. 

As we walk out, Maxi pulls me closer, sliding one arm around my waist. 

“How do you feel?” 

“A little bit like I’m high on drugs, but great. This was the right decision.” I explain and she smiles. 

“That's good....oh and incase you wanna get another one, feel free to make the decision as spontaneous as today.” 

“I will try.” 

[rugbuggk]

Something I think a lot is about Integra’s fashion sense.

Think about it !! Since twelve she’s running this damn organization with no breaks at all, maturing earlier than others kids her age, while some girls thought about what dress would they wear for the weekend, Integra filled mountains of papers until she falls asleep, and such every day. No time to chose dresses, only having to get dressed as fast as she could, to the point she preferred dressing with suits and trousers. Not that they don’t suit her, Lord have mercy every time Integra Hellsing leaves her big coat over her chair while she smokes, she looks like a goddess!

However I do think that, Teggy would somehow after Alucard’s “death” (probably in her late 20s and early 30s) try on new things, listen to the Draculina that dragged for an hour or more about how beautiful she would look if she tried on something more than those suits, she doesn’t have to wear those aaaalll the time, of course Seras sees much more potential in a woman like Integra.

But she doesn’t force her to wear anything, after all if she changes clothes that’s only her choice! Little does she know about what that blonde woman did when locked in her room; carefully contemplating her body in front of the mirror, looking for answers in something else than suits.

She didn’t have that awkward fase where she would mess up her clothes and think of how good it looked on her when it was actually something not even a clown would wear. Integra grew up looking imposing and towering as high as a mountain, behind those suits, rocking them for decades and ignoring the new fashion trends or the latest winter collection.

She really never cared about clothes, but this time, while standing in front of the mirror, she asked herself what harm would a dress do.

It doesn’t even have to be a dress too! She has seen those models, beating the thought of pants being for men only while also adding their little touch of femininity.

It doesn’t have to be feminine either! Those women also wore clothes only the most of classy, fashionable men would wear.

And, if they looked good on them, how would it look on her?

That morning Seras choked while drinking her blood pack, the round table had been waiting for about ten minutes, Integra isn’t a late person, only one thing would make the exception.

“My deepest apologies, gentlemen. I had a last-minute problem. It won’t happen again. “

Seras was speechless, so was the rest of the men in there. Integra presented herself with her cigar over her lips, her only eye blue and her blonde hair long and free as usual, so, what was the elephant in the room this time?

A knee-high emerald green, tube skirt, off shoulder ruched long sleeved shirt, a gold necklace to go with her kitten heels. It was hard to get the eyes out of her, until Sir Integra cleared her throat and dared more than one man there to say anything about her.

Not only that meeting had a start, but also a did her liking towards fashion.

—

Outfit I *tried* to describe for tegra! A little headcanon of mine that got extended lol, what do you think?

[glowinghae]

meet me at midnight || c.three

[Chapter Three - Only Love Can Hurt Like This]

𝐉𝐀𝐒𝐎𝐍 𝐓𝐎𝐃𝐃 + OC

meet me at midnight masterlist 𝟏𝟖+, lots of various torture, trauma, angst, suffering, cheating, violent death, funerals, women not supporting women, arguments, fluff but really a lot of angst. smut [p in v, rough, fingering, etc.] all characters are over 18,

to be a vigilante requires only three things: a broken heart, the resources, and the will.

𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐎𝐑𝐒 𝐃𝐎 𝐍𝐎𝐓 𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐓 𝟏𝟖+ 𝐎𝐍𝐋𝐘! an extremely fat thank you to @hllokttyairhead for being so extremely beautiful, supporting, and lovely in the making of this chapter. pls pls pls go and read her stuff because it is some of the best writing on this site.

Hazy morning light peaked through window shades. Esther Wayne was sleeping on clouds, or that’s what it felt like. Her skin was caressed in soft white linen as far as her dazed eyes could see. The warmth of the sun felt healing against her bare skin.

As her vision began to clear, it became more apparent that she was not in her safe house. Yet, Esther recognized this place. The walls were a deep grayish-blue. She knew it immediately because she had helped pick it out once upon a time.

Sitting up quickly, Esther looked around rapidly. How had she gotten here? This isn’t where she had been the night before. Suddenly, her head began to spin at a dizzying pace. Memories from the night before rushed her like a herd of angry elephants.

It couldn’t be possible what she’d seen. What she’d heard. What she’d felt. Esther reached her hand up and grazed her face; she’d felt his fingers on her cheek. On her lips.

Jason Todd was alive. At least, it seemed like he was. Maybe all last night was just a dream. But then, how did she end up here?

This was Dick Grayson’s apartment in the industrial district of Gotham. She knew because she’d helped him pick it out. There’d been a time when they were supposed to live in it together. 

She didn’t see him anywhere, but Esther could smell food being cooked, which meant Dick was there. 

Usually, she’d be freaking out that Dick knew where she was because that meant that Bruce would know where she was. But if Dick had told Bruce, her older brother would be here waiting to strong-arm her into being his little puppet again.

Not to mention that these sheets were the best she’d slept in so long. And the mattress was so impossibly comfortable. Her suit was folded neatly in the corner of the room, with her blood-stained mask on top.

Wait, if her suit was over there… Then what was she-? Esther lifted the covers and looked down. Someone had undressed her and put her in a pair of boxers and a t-shirt. She touched her skin, its normal post-fight grittiness nonexistent. Someone had washed her off.

Despite all these reasons to be comfortable, Esther’s head was pounding. She ran her tongue over her teeth, the faint taste of chemicals was still there.

Shit. Esther hadn’t really had a choice on how to escape Bane, but it had come with consequences. The venom Bane was so fond of wasn’t sitting well with her. She’d come in contact with it years before when she was younger, and as it turns out, she had a bit of an allergy to it.

Her stomach was churning and sure enough, when she looked at her bare thighs there were deep red splotches painted across them. Those would clear up in a few hours but the dizziness and headaches liked to stick around a bit longer. 

What did any of that matter, though? 

Jason. Jason. Jason was all that ran through her mind. Had it been real? Could it even be possible for it to be real? Esther had cradled his dead body in her arms and watched the bullet steal his life, youth, and future away. Her fingers had been soaked in his blood as she caressed his broken face.

Beautiful Jason. Her Red. It certainly looked like him. Sounded like him too. That permanently sarcastic voice.

Her chest swelled up with something if it had been him last night, despite how unlikely that was. Something light and warm… something she hadn’t felt in so long.

Hope.

But hope for what exactly? And why was Jason running around as Red Hood and working with criminals? There were so many questions that she didn’t understand, but it felt like she’d been holding her breath for the past year, and for once, just now, sweet blissful air filled her lungs.

Esther sighed, she couldn’t stay here all day, and she deeply considered leaving out the window. But man, whatever Dick was cooking smelled great. Rubbing at her temple, Esther threw her blotchy legs off the side of the bed and stood up, the oversized t-shirt dropping to her mid-thigh. 

It still didn’t make sense to her how she ended up here last night. The last thing she remembered was Jason’s green eyes looking at her in concern.

Blood rushed to her head as she took a few steps forward and opened the door to the kitchen. Sure enough, Dick Grayson’s back was to her as he finished frying some bacon. He didn’t notice her entry because his attention was focused on the TV in the living room.

“Sources say that the Joker’s body was found this morning, hanging from the sign of Ace Chemicals. His body was reportedly mutilated and found with a sign pinned to his chest with the words ‘you’re welcome. GCPD is conducting a thorough autopsy to ensure it’s not Joker up to one of his tricks but as of right now, it could be a very Merry Christmas for Gotham City.”

Jack Ryder’s voice was cut out as Dick flicked the tv off. “So… you finally did it then,” Dick said, not looking back at her. He must have realized that she’d come out of the room while Esther was listening to the reporter.

Was last night truly real? Joker was dead. Could that mean that Jason really was alive?

“It wasn’t me,” Esther said in almost a daze. When Dick turned to face her, she noticed how tired his face was. How disappointed it was too. She rolled her eyes, “It wasn’t.”

“It’s just a coincidence then that your suit and weapons are covered in blood?” Dick’s tone wasn't annoyed exactly, more… exasperated.

There was a moment of silence as Esther grabbed a couple plates from the cupboard, knowing for a fact that Dick had made enough food for both of them. “I was there. But it wasn’t me. Someone beat me to it.”

It was nagging at her. Esther wanted to scream that Jason Todd was alive, but she couldn’t. What if it really was some trick? And everyone got their hopes up just to be let down? Somehow she doubted it was a trick. Her gut told her it was really him.

Truthfully speaking, Esther was being selfish. She just wanted to keep this to herself a little longer. Maybe figure out what was going on first. 

Dick turned to look at her, searching her face for something. After a moment, he seemed to have found it. “Hm.” He believed her, “So the blood must be from all the people you killed trying to get to him.”

Well, there was no denying that. Instead, Esther looked him up and down. Over the years, Dick Grayson had not changed much. His hair was overgrown as always, and he had a sleepy look in his eyes. His Romani features had always made her heart swoon, but as Esther looked at Dick now, she felt nothing. 

Nothing wasn’t precisely true. “If you disapproved so much, Bruce would be here dragging me to some rehabilitation center already.” Esther had known Dick since her first day in Wayne Manor. He’d been there before her since the death of his own parents. Dick had brought her hot chocolate on her first night, and she’d told him the bed was too soft after a lifetime of sleeping on a hospital cot. Esther smiled at the memory of him putting a pillow and blanket on the ground for an anxious little girl. 

Dick threw her an uncomfortable look and Esther sighed; she had a feeling about what he was about to say. “Ok, full disclosure? Bruce is on his way here, but it’s unrelated. We’ve got about half an hour since the traffic is bad. I uh- I didn’t really expect to find you in my t-shirt in my bed this morning.”

What? Esther’s brow furrowed, “Wait, I was here when you got back from Bludhaven?” So, he hadn’t found her passed out somewhere. That means… Red Hood had brought her here last night. Red Hood had undressed her and cleaned her injuries.

“You don’t remember?” Dick arranged the food on their plates before throwing the dishes into the sink. His eyes squinted at her, “Are you okay? Did you take any bad hits to the head?” He sat next to her and moved to feel her head with the back of his hand; she blocked him with her arm. Dick paused. He’d almost forgotten that things weren’t normal between them.

It didn’t hurt Esther anymore, what he’d done to her. Those kinds of feelings for him were gone. But she didn’t want him to get his hopes up. She gave him a tight smile. “I got a little beat up last night. I think I might’ve taken one too many blows.” It wasn’t really a lie; she really had been beaten up last night.

“You don’t have Alfred stitching you up anymore, Essie; just make sure you have someone look at your injuries, okay? Regardless, I’m glad you came somewhere safe to rest up.” Dick sighed. They ate silently for a moment before he bit his lip, “So, it’s finally over? This crusade of yours?” Esther’s chewing slowed, “I mean, Joker is dead. That’s what you wanted, right?”

He wasn’t wrong. But all last night had done was beg even more questions. And the one over them all had still yet to be answered. “Joker was hired by someone to take Jay and me.” Esther chewed on her eggs, “I still haven’t figured out who. It’s not over until I do.”

“I was afraid you’d say something like that.” He grumbled, “Why can’t you just come home, Essie? Alfred’s driving himself crazy worrying about you. And Bruce-”

“Is having a hard time finding a batgirl replacement? Has he tried taking out an ad in the paper?” Esther responded snidely and Dick squeezed the bridge of his nose. She did feel a pang of guilt about Alfred, though.

“I already told you the situation with Tim, and he’s still got a broken nose from when you ran into him in the sewers a few weeks ago. He’s fourteen-”

“And we were twelve by the time we knew how to block a simple elbow attack.” Esther rolled her eyes, using her toast to casually soak up some of the yolks on her plate. “I’ve been taking it easy on him every time we’ve run into each other. Let him know that will stop soon if he can’t manage to land even one hit against me.”

Esther would be lying if she said she hated the kid. She hated Bruce for taking him on. It was truthful, however, that she didn’t hold back much when fighting the literal child. Esther didn’t want another dead Robin, and if this Tim kid couldn’t beat her, there were too many people who wouldn’t stop at a broken nose.

Dick knew this, of course. Esther had helped him and Bruce train Jason when he came along, and she used to do the same things to him even as children. That was, of course, until Jason grew to be taller than her, and she’d had to adjust her tactics. The point is that Dick Grayson knew that Esther could be harsh, but only when she felt it necessary.

It was one of the things he’d loved about her.

“I’ll tell him.” Dick gave in as he studied her face, drinking in Esther’s presence. It had been a while since they’d been this at ease around each other, even if they were arguing. “I- We just miss you. Things haven’t been the same in so long. It hasn’t really been a family since… you know.”

This would have made Esther fly off the handle a few days ago. But today? Today felt different. Joker was dead, and Jason… Jason was alive. Maybe. Yet to be confirmed. That black hole inside of her chest felt a little smaller today.

“Dick,” Esther glanced at his hand on the table before placing her own on top of it. Dick’s breathing stopped. “I know you can’t understand this, but when I watched Jason die, Esther Wayne died too. She’s gone. I’m just… Whatever remains.”

Dick nodded. He’d always known that to be true, yet as she held his hand for the first time in over a year, Dick felt like maybe whatever remained of Esther Wayne was still worth fighting for. She had this confidence about her, a spirit Esther had never had before.

He tried not to remember that that confidence was from killing people.

Esther squeezed his hand and sighed, “I’ve been meaning to talk to you for a while, but with everything that happened last night, I need to tell you this now.” Dick swallowed in anticipation, “Dick, I forgave you a while ago for moving on when the Joker had me.”

Dick Grayson choked on his own air. “Y-you did?” He sputtered, and Esther nodded, unphased by his typical inability to function as an ordinary adult man. Once upon a time, she’d found it adorable. Now she found it a little… exhausting.

“Don’t get that look in your eyes, Dick.” Esther took a bite out of the apple slices on her plate, “When we were together, I betrayed myself so many times before you ever betrayed me. How could I have asked you to be true to me when I was never true to myself?”

“Essie-” Dick couldn’t look her in the eyes.

Esther motioned for him to wait, “I gave up so many pieces of me to be with you.” She gestured around the apartment which was covered in Christmas decorations. “I bought all these two years ago… I hate Christmas.” Dick opened his mouth to protest, but Essie continued, “I know you didn’t ask me to. But that’s what I mean. I wanted to be a girl you wanted so badly that I willingly gave up on just being me.”

There was a moment of quiet as Dick looked at her. Esther Wayne had changed so much in more ways than one. It felt almost like he was meeting her for the first time, yet it also felt like she was somehow breaking up with him again?

And then she did something unexpected. Esther smiled. “All of this, despite how terrible it’s been, made me not want to hide anymore. Even if I have to physically hide to do so.” She laughed.

“It sounds like you’re dumping me, which is honestly impressive, seeing as we haven’t been together for over a year now,” Dick smirked.

“Look at me,” Esther commanded softly, and he obeyed, finally looking into her dark gray eyes with his ocean blue ones. She was still so beautiful, even after all this time. “I’ve known you longer than anyone. I hope… One day we can be friends again.”

She removed her hand from his as Esther stood to clean off her plate, but Dick wished she’d have held it just a few moments longer. He watched as Esther washed her dish, thinking to himself how much he wished they could go back to being more than just friends. Just one more chance.

“Well, we can be a family again, too, if you’re still here when Bruce arrives.” He jested and watched as she bristled. 

“Hard pass.” Esther grumbled, “Which reminds me. I can’t exactly leave here in pajamas or in my bloody suit, so….”

Dick Grayson rolled his eyes, “I think I have some of your old clothes packed away.” He gestured for her to follow her, and as he walked towards his closet, Dick wished she wouldn’t take them. She was slowly disappearing from this place, and Dick feared the day Esther was completely gone.

The day Esther wouldn’t need him anymore.

…

Esther smoothed out the fabric of her pants as she walked down the apartment building stairs. These were actually clothes she’d bought herself that her old stylist had never let her wear. 

There was a mirror on one of the landings, and Esther stopped to look at herself. Her hair was still short since the Joker had cut it the year prior, but now she’d styled it into a shaggy mullet. 

For most of her life, someone told her what to wear and how to look. Bruce had turned her into a pop icon like she was nothing more profound than a Kardashian. It had been a good cover; who’d suspect the ditsy socialite to be a midnight vigilante? Yet it seemed unfair; Bruce Wayne got to be a bachelor that was also a genius businessman. 

Esther Wayne adjusted the oversized t-shirt that was layered over a loose hoodie. Her tan cargo pants were extra loose on her since she’d lost weight from when she’d purchased them. And the converse taken were a pair Esther had bought two days before the Joker took her. She’d never gotten to wear them.

It felt good to look in the mirror for once and like what she saw. The past year had been nothing but comfortable clothes she could fight in, and the years before that were spent in clothes so tight she could hardly breathe. For once, looking in the mirror, Esther saw only her. 

The clock on the wall of the hallway caught her attention; there were mere minutes before Bruce was supposed to arrive. Esther swallowed hard; she needed to stop wasting time.

Bolting down the stairs, Essie gripped the straps of the backpack that held her suit and weapons. Dick had given her one of his old college bags, but the Khopesh had barely fit, and the blade was poking into her back.

Just as her feet hit the pavement outside, she noticed the reporters. Damn. Esther had walked right into that.

“The anonymous tip said he’d be here any minute-”

An annoyingly familiar voice caught her attention, and before Esther could slip away, Vicki Vale made eye contact. Double damn. 

“Esther Wayne?” Vicki’s voice was surprised but coy. Esther loathed this woman. But Esther had no time to tuck her tail and run before the cameras were snapping pictures of her. She blinked from the bright flash.

“It’s literally the middle of the day.” Esther used her fingers to shield herself from the lights, “Why the flash?” Her tone was irritated.

Vicki stepped towards her and looked Essie up and down. “We haven’t seen you in a while. I heard from a little birdy that you ran away to South Korea to study abroad. You look… Erm, different.”

Hmm. That must have been the story Bruce came up with to explain her absence. “Uh, gamsahaeyo?” Esther replied she’d learned Korean as a kid. Along with a couple other languages. She didn’t excel in many school subjects, but Essie had a knack for languages. “And is it considered ‘running away’ to study abroad these days? Wow, Gotham’s changed so much.” She feigned an airy voice and Vicki squinted. It wasn’t hard to tell that Esther was mocking her.

Vicki glanced at the building behind Esther before smirking, “A bit early in the morning to be at Dick Grayson’s apartment, isn’t it?” Esther internally rolled her eyes. “Can Gotham assume its favorite love birds are giving it yet another go?”

“No.” Esther snapped at her; for years, Vicki had made it her personal vendetta to embarrass her to the city, but Esther wasn’t pretending to be an airhead anymore. She was sick of it. “How about you and Jack Ryder? Married yet? Or are you still holding on to that engagement ring while he’s getting mouth fucked by the secretary under his desk on the morning news?”

Vicki gaped. Esther Wayne had always let her step all over her; it was part of the charade. Vicki didn’t realize she’d been in over her head for years. “Why, you little-”

“Vicki, always a pleasure. Glad you got to catch my little sister on her way back from the airport.”

Triple damn.

Vicki Vale had held Esther up, and time was out.

Bruce Wayne had made his way around Vicki’s crew and placed a firm hand on Esther’s shoulder. His grip was incredibly tight and sent a clear message. There’s no running.

Vicki was caught off guard and rushed to speak, “Mr. Wayne, what do you have to say about the news this morning? Since Joker’s presumed death, Wayne's stock value has increased by twelve percent. What do you believe the connection of that to be?”

“I’d love to set up an interview sometime. But as you can see, my sister is tired, and I’d really like to have a word with her after months apart...” As Bruce spoke, Esther blurred out whatever he was saying. It was probably something generically charming anyway. 

Why did the reporters only ever ask her about dating and fashion while Bruce got asked questions about the company? Esther held only one share less than her brother. Just another thing that pissed her off.

Those thoughts were cut off as Bruce’s hand pulled her back into the apartment building. Before the door shut behind her Esther turned around and threw Vicki the middle finger, “Najung-e, gaenyeon-a!”

The moment the doors shut behind Bruce and he’d checked that the coast was clear, that dashing smile disappeared. To anyone else, his expression might have looked blank, but the pulse in his temple told Esther a very different story.

Bruce was livid.

“Was it you-?”

“No.” Esther smacked his hand off of her shoulder. Bruce towered above her, and once upon a time, seeing him this angry with her would make her recoil, but now, after everything, she found it almost funny. “I didn’t do it. But I wish I had.” Her lip curled as she snarled at him.

“You don’t get it.” Bruce’s tone was dangerous, but Esther didn’t waver. “This city is about to be torn apart as every Crime Boss in Gotham fights over the Joker’s turf. And maybe you didn’t kill Joker, but explain to me why I found Bane’s body floating in the Gotham river.”

Esther hesitated, “That-”

“Don’t say it wasn’t you. I checked dental records against the chunk bitten out of his neck, and yours was the only match.” Bruce glared down at her, and Esther finally looked away. “I see you’re taking this ‘wolf’ thing a little too literally.” Oh, that was rich coming from him.

“I didn’t have a choice.” Esther said, “He was about to pop my head off like a barbie doll.” The air in this lobby smelled like dust and pennies; it made her head ache. “I- I wasn’t really a match for him.”

Bruce scanned her body. Sure enough, Esther looked roughed up. She hunched slightly to the side, indicating that she probably had a bruised rib. “There’s always a choice, Esther. I trained you better than this. You know what you’re choosing.” He grumbled. Esther looked sick, her skin a bit paler than usual. There was a slight red rash creeping up her neck. “Did you ingest Bane’s Venom when you bit him?”

Esther’s ear twitched at the tinge of concern in his voice. “I’m fine. It wears off in a couple hours.” His words about Gotham becoming a war zone had struck a chord. She’d thought Joker hadn’t gained enough influence for that to happen, but that was just hopeful thinking.

“If you didn’t kill Joker, then who did?” Bruce inquired an edge to his voice again. “It could be someone more dangerous than Joker.”

“What?” Esther’s eye twitched, “More dangerous than Joker? What a fucking joke. I’m sorry. Are you just upset cause someone murdered your soulmate?” She felt bad as soon as she said it, but sometimes it was hard not to believe that Bruce was just as obsessed with the Joker as Joker was with Batman. Esther sighed, “I can’t tell you.”

And that was true. To tell Bruce would put him on the Red Hood’s trail. On Jason’s trail. She couldn’t do that without knowing what Jason’s game plan was or Esther risked ruining it.

Bruce glared at her, “So now we don’t just murder people, we’re protecting other killers too? Where is the line going to be drawn, Esther?”

Now the vein in Esther’s forehead was pulsing. “Not everything in Gotham concerns you, Bruce. Especially when you won’t take the steps necessary to keep Gotham safe. And I only kill people who deserve it-”

“Who are you to decide that?”

“If they line themselves up with people like Joker, that’s all the evidence I need-”

”Killing people isn’t going to bring Jason back, Esther.”

“You wanna bet?”

The air in the lobby went thick at her last couple words, their voices had raised significantly, and Esther was on her tiptoes with her chin up, her stare unrelenting when she realized what she’d just said.

“And what is that supposed to mean?” Bruce squinted. 

“Nothing,” Esther grumbled, turning on her heel to leave.

“Where are you going? We’re not done here.” Bruce grabbed her arm, and Esther ripped it aggressively from his grasp.

“What’re you going to do, arrest me?” They both knew that wasn’t possible. To arrest Esther would mean exposing Bruce Wayne as Batman. “Give Alfred my love. It’s been a pleasure, as always.”

And with that, Esther took one last look at her fuming older brother before ducking out of the room.

…

Gotham was buzzing.

The Joker was dead. Sure, not all of the city’s problems were gone, but one of the cruelest, worst ones was. 

People were smiling on the street, stopping to show friends the article on their phones. Esther couldn’t walk ten feet without hearing people talking about it.

A part of her was still upset about someone else killing him. If it really had been Jason last night, she supposed he deserved to be the one to kill Joker. But didn’t she deserve it a little bit too?

Esther had circled a couple different blocks to be sure Bruce wasn’t tailing her, and she’d checked twice to see if he’d left any bugs or trackers. After pulling one off her book bag, it seemed she was in the clear.  

Gotham, in the daylight, was a completely different place.

The dusting of snow was turning to slush on the busy streets, and city workers rushed to put up final Christmas decorations for the upcoming parade.

During the daytime, Esther was often asleep, researching new leads, training, or working undercover to infiltrate different crime families. But today, she was simply walking around the city. She found herself down at the docks, walking along the old wooden piers. Esther had been here many times in the past. Often with someone by her side.

“If you don’t stop laughing, someone’s going to call the cops.” Jason clamped a hand over the squirming girl’s mouth.

Esther Wayne stared at him through half-lidded eyes, her chest shaking from her giggles. “Mmkay.” His hand muffled the word, which he removed as her body stilled a bit.

The two teenagers were sitting in a small paddle boat underneath the dock. Jason had packed it with blankets so they wouldn’t get cold. A trick he’d come up with a while back after this had become a regular spot for them to go.

It wasn’t too cold that spring night, just a bit wet from the morning's rain. Esther reached across Jason’s lap and snatched the joint from his fingers, quick to take another draw before flicking the dead bud into the water.

“Oh, nice.” Jason rolled his red-tinged eyes, “You always take the last hit.”

“And you always take twice the hits that I do.” Esther fired back, stretching her legs along the bottom of the boat, reveling in how extra soft the blankets felt against her skin.

Jason ruffled her hair, “It’s not my fault that you’re a lightweight.”

“It’s not my fault that you grew to twice my size last summer. Fucking giraffe.” Esther’s laugh rang through the dock again, and this time she clamped her own hand over her mouth, “Be quiet, Esther.” She scolded herself, causing Jason to laugh with her.

“I don’t get it.” Jay reached into his backpack and pulled out a bag of cheese Bugles and two silver Rockstars. She raised an eyebrow at him, urging him to go on. “Why are you only a little shit with me?”

Esther snatched up her drink and huffed, “One: You know I like the red one, and you always get the stupid silvers. And two: I don’t know what you’re talking about.” The can hissed as she popped it open and took a long gulp.

Jason did the same before staring at her. The red around his iris only served to make the green in his eyes a little more vibrant. “Oh, come on. You totally pretend to be someone else all day, but at night when it’s just us, You’re so fucking weird.” He laughed, subconsciously pulling one of the blankets up to sit around Esther’s waist a little bit higher in case she was cold. When Esther gave him an incredulous look, Jason smirked. “You’re telling me that you’d smoke weed with Dick?” 

Shame pulled at Esther’s heart, “So what? That’s a normal thing to keep private.” But she knew he was right.

“Okay, different example. Vicki Vale on the way to school this morning. She literally asked what your advice to other ‘abnormally tall’ teenage girls was. Now, the Esther I know would have commented about how she was wearing the same clothes from yesterday’s afternoon news, but instead, you smiled like a dweeb and said, ‘just wear styles flattering to your body shape'.” Jason raised the pitch of his voice to imitate hers, and Esther stifled a laugh.

“Vicki Vale is a vile bitch who’s dating Jack Ryder. On a scale of one to ten of hotness, that douchebag Ryder is an imaginary number. So I wouldn’t exactly say she’s winning at life.” Esther stuck her tongue out at the thought of that little witch before grabbing a handful of Bugles and shoving them into her mouth. 

“That’s exactly what I mean!” Jason said, “When it’s just you and me, you say fucking funny shit like that. But you’re a goody-goody all over again if anyone else is around.” Jason wondered silently where he fell on her ‘hotness scale’.

Esther shrugged, “I don’t know, Red.” She drowned her Bugles with her energy drink, wishing they hadn’t burned through that joint so quickly. 

He had a point, though. Whenever she tried to be herself at home, she seemed to let other people down. ‘Esther, chill out.’ ‘Esther, act like a lady.’ And then there was Dick. She wanted him to notice her so badly, to see her as someone worthy of his time. Esther loved when he talked to her about improving herself and how hopeful he spoke of her. His attention felt like a gulp of air in her otherwise drowning existence. 

Silence fell over them, but that was okay. They often sat quietly, neither feeling the need to say unnecessary words. After a moment, Esther heaved, “I just want to be easy to understand.” Jason snapped his attention to her, studying her face as Esther glared at the label of her Rockstar. “Whenever I’m ‘just me,’ everyone says something like, ‘I don’t understand you’ or ‘why are you like this’?” She said, “Don’t they know that hurts?”

Jay could hear the strain in her voice. He hadn’t meant to kill the vibe, but this had been on his mind for a while. “But you’re ‘just you’ when it’s the two of us?”

There was a moment as Esther considered that before a smile snuck onto her lips. “Well,” Suddenly, she threw her arms around Jason’s shoulders and placed a saccharine kiss on his cheek, “That’s because you’re my soulmate, Jason Todd.”

Red rushed into Jason’s cheeks, his face burning up. That was weird. He didn’t usually get bashful like that. Normally he’d push her off and tell her how annoying she was. This time though, he savored the moment for just a second. “Whatever, loser.”

It was starting to snow again, snowflakes floating all around Esther, a few landing on her dark lashes. That memory felt so bittersweet. 

As Esther walked along the Gotham River, she felt a bit silly. Stupid, even. It had always been so apparent that Jason liked her.

The cold started to nip at her bare fingers when the burner phone in her pocket buzzed. Esther pulled it out and read the text she’d just received.

“So, are you dead? J’s been all over the news today but I haven’t heard from you. Let me know, xx.”

That’s right. Esther had never gotten back to her secret ally since they told her Joker’s location the night before. Essie quickly typed out a reply and sent it back.

“Alive.”

Her phone buzzed again a moment later.

“Always a lady of many words. That’s what I love about you. Drinks to celebrate?”

Esther blinked. Up until now, it had been strictly business with this person. But now that Joker is dead, a celebration might be in order. And it might not hurt to see if they had some intel on Red Hood, so she could start to piece together what Jason was playing at.

“Sure.” Essie slicked send and rolled her eyes at the text she received next.

“Wear something black and sexy.”

…

Damn, this bar was sleazy, but Esther had come to expect that from her contact at this point.

Esther’s body was exhausted. She’d gotten caught up earlier doing errands to do this meet-up that she hadn’t had any time to go back to her hideout and rest up or drop off her stuff. Which is why the backpack she’d placed behind the bar was literally bursting at the seams with her shit.

The bar was dark and grungy. The loud music made her head pound. At least her rashes had gone away, though.

Esther knew better by now than to ignore this contact’s requests, which is why she’d gone and bought some black clothes on the way here. A pair of low-rise baggy cargo pants (she was getting quite the collection of cargo pants), an oversized NASCAR jacket, and a bralette as a top. The all-black ensemble made her pale skin glow in the bar's red lighting.

The contact wasn’t here yet, and Esther adjusted the black bandana covering her head. It’s not like Esther could meet up with this person without being in disguise. Which is why she’d had to go and get some heavy makeup done, buy brown eye contacts, and why she had to wear these stupid fake nails.

As Clark Kent would say, ‘people don’t notice half of what you think they do,’ which is why he could slap on a pair of glasses and no one could figure out that he’s Superman. 

This was why with a lot of contouring, a heavy black eyeshadow, a bold lip, and an annoying pair of sunglasses, no one had recognized her as Esther Wayne. Just a weirdo who wore sunglasses at night.

“Well, well, well, if it isn’t my favorite vigilante.” The heavy Gotham accent dripped with confidence, and Esther watched as Harley Quinn slid into the chair next to her.

Some explanation might be helpful here. A few years back, Bat-Girl had been tipped off that Harley Quinn was going on a murder spree through Bludhaven. So Esther had shown up where Harley was hiding, only to find her a hysterical mess, her face heavily beaten up.

The Bat-Girl had chosen to take mercy on her and sat down and talked to her. Only to find out that Harley had been abandoned by the Joker only to find out that she was pregnant. Esther remembered sitting there, knowing all the horrible things Harley had done, yet felt nothing but pity for her.

So Esther had helped Harley find a safe, discreet clinic to get treatment and would check in on her as Bat-Girl every so often. When Joker took her and Jason, Harley tried to help Batman locate Bat-Girl. 

After going rogue, Esther revealed only to Harley that She-Wolf had once been Bat-Girl. Harley Quinn was helping her to get revenge on the people who tormented Esther, but a strange friendship had bloomed between them.

“You know, one of these days, you’re going to stop comin’ here in that get-up. I pinky-promise I won’t tell no one who you are.” Harley whined, her pale white skin practically glowing in the dimly lit room. She said this every time they saw each other. “If you’re rollin’ your eyes, I can’t tell.”

Esther had been.

Harley was in a skimpy reflective black dress, her tattooed body on full display. The one thing Essie had always been jealous of Harley for was her confidence. Harley certainly never felt ashamed of her body. Although Harls was definitely toned down seeing as she was a wanted woman.

“So, did you just want to match or..?” Esther nodded to their twinning black get-up.

“It’s a funeral, BFG!” Harley giggled, “Rest in sufferin’, Mr.J!” The white-blonde-haired woman was beaming, but then, when wasn’t she? She reached over the bar and pulled out a bottle of vodka, “Put it on my tab, Steve. Let’s drink to that wretched old bastard!”

…

A few shots later and Harley’s fingers were inside Esther’s mouth.

“I don’t see any flesh chunks in there.” Harley pouted and stopped holding Essie’s mouth wide open. Essie flexed her jaw, her eyes becoming heavy. Truthfully, she didn’t really like to drink; it just made her sluggish. “You better not be pullin’ my leg, BFG.”

“I’m not!” Esther slurred a little bit. “It tasted so bad.” A question was nagging at her, though. “Why do you call me BFG?”

Harley Quinn laughed, “You’re the big friendly giant!” Usually, Esther would be mortified but somehow, coming from Harley, that was actually funny.

Essie covered her mouth as she chortled, “I’m only six inches above the national average.” She said before deciding now was as good a time as any to ask Harley some questions, “Hey, sidenote, have you heard anything about a guy calling himself Red Hood?”

“Aw, business talk?” Harley huffed, drowning another cherry-flavored shot. This woman was a tank. With a sigh, she set her shot glass down, “Yeah, he’s offered protection to some of the smaller mob families from Penguin, Dent, and Black Mask’s guys. In return, they give him a cut of everything and let him use their men. Enough have agreed that he’s risen the ranks pretty quickly. Rumor has it that Black Mask is especially pissed about it and is coming at the guy hard.” Her eyes narrowed, “Why?”

The music filled the silence as Esther bit her lip. “Anything else?”

“Uh ah.” Quinn shook her head, “No deal, BFG. I ain’t tellin’ you nothin’ more unless you tell me why. You’ve neva asked about him before. You two have a little run-in or somethin’?”

Esther tapped the side of her glass with her fingernail, her leg shaking under the bar. “I, uh, yeah, I mean, kind of.” She didn’t want to let Harley down by telling her it had actually been Red Hood that killed the joker.

“Oh my god.” Harley grabbed Essie’s arm suddenly; her face looked like it was going to split in two from her grin. “Ya want to fuck ‘im.”

“What?!” Essie practically screamed before clamping a hand over her own mouth. Esther’s face was turning a bright shade of pink. “No!” She whisper-yelled.

“Come on, BFG. When was the last time you were fucked?” Too damn long ago, but Harley didn’t need to know that. “If ya need to get laid that bad, I can always hook ya up with a friend of Ivy’s. It’s a plant, but, ya know, if you’re that desperate-”

“Harley, please, it’s not like that.” Esther pleaded, taking another shot to forget this absolutely mortifying moment. “I-I, I’m not in the mental space for that kind of thing.”

“Why not? ‘Cause of Robin?” The moment Harley said it, the other girl went silent.“‘Cause ya loved ‘em?”

As if Esther could turn any redder, “Harls, no. It- It was never like that-”

“I know what ya said. He was your best friend before Mr.J killed ‘em. But let me ask ya somethin’; In the past year, after all this time killin’ in the name of your dead friend, have ya even thought about datin’?”

No. Of course not. Losing Jason had consumed her. He’d died without her ever knowing how it would’ve felt to be loved by him. That tormented her every night. To even think about dating at the moment felt hollow and cold. 

Her expression must’ve tipped Harley off to the answer, “Right, that’s what I thought. And I’m willing to bet it’s cause you’ve been in too much pain to even consider it?” When Esther nodded, Harley sighed longingly, “Only love hurts like that, sweetheart. Only love.”

This bar suddenly felt stuffy, like it was ten degrees too hot.

“I’ll tell ya about old Red Face but you gotta promise me you’re gonna get yourself some fuckin’ action.” Harley held out her pinky, and Esther begrudgingly hooked it in her own, “Mmkay. There is this other weird rumor. They say he’s workin’ fa someone. One of Falcone’s guys was tellin’ me that Red Hood’s boss has been real keen on that weird bakery that Falcone runs. He said, Red Hood’s been puttin’ some money into it and the business has been boomin’. Now.” Harley shifted in her seat, “I haven’t confirmed this yet, so don’t get ya panties in a twist, but I also heard that Red’s boss might be the same as whoever hired Joker to take you and the bird.”

“That’s true. I heard that myself.” Essie nodded but bit her cheek. She had known that but now, thinking about it, it didn’t make any sense. Why would Jason be working for the guy that hired the Joker to kill him? “That’s all?”

“That’s all.” Harley mimicked, “Jesus, I get no appreciation for all my hard work. Can we get plastered now?”

…

And plastered they got.

At least, Harley did. Esther just got relatively drunk. She hobbled around a little bit as she walked down the street alone.

Esther had walked Harley to her apartment that she shared with Ivy. Essie was, like, 85 percent sure that those two were fucking. The night air was undoubtedly below freezing, and it was still snowing. A thick layer of snowfall crunched beneath her feet. 

This was Esther’s favorite time of year. The biting cold seeped into her bones; it pricked at her exposed skin. She must have looked crazy, walking the dark Gotham streets alone, but part of her dared someone to mess with her. 

As she careened in the darkness, Esther pulled her bandana and sunglasses from her face, dropping them carelessly on the street. In her buzzed mind, Essie remembered that she’d put a makeup wipe in her pocket earlier. “Thank you, sober Esther.” She slurred, pulling it out and ripping it from its packet.

It’s not that Essie minded how the makeup looked, but she loathed how it felt on her skin. As it melted onto the cloth, the frigid air seemed to caress her face more fiercely. 

The snow was now coming down in heavy flakes. As the cathedral came into view, Essie paused to look up at its gothic architecture. Sure, squatting in its attic wasn’t the ideal situation, but Esther couldn't think of a more beautiful sight on a night like this, with the snow reflected in the lamplight. 

To be fair, she couldn’t really think, period. Her brain was so sluggish, and her stomach felt like it was in a dryer. Esther didn’t feel like digging through the backpack to find her grapple hook, and she also didn’t trust her tits to not fall out of this ‘top’ if she did so. Glancing at her watch, Essie decided it was late enough that all the nuns would be asleep. It was nearly midnight, after all.

Crossing to the west side of the building, Esther counted three windows to the left. This was the one she always purposefully left unlocked. It took a matter of seconds before she’d hoisted herself through the sill and silently closed it behind her. 

Being careful to check around corners and be as quiet as possible, Esther stumbled up the flights of stairs, down the crowded storage room, and finally to the seemingly hidden door. It was warm in the church, so she slipped her leather racing jacket off her shoulders and carried it in her arms.

Brushing away cobwebs, Esther took a deep, exaggerated sigh of relief as she stepped into her haven. Only to freeze as a silhouette in the dim light startled her, but it took only a moment before she realized who was standing in her space.

Jason Todd.

He was in his Red Hood get-up, but his mask was sitting across the room on her desk. Jay was reading something, a red Rockstar in his left hand, a small notebook in the other. Essie recognized it immediately as her journal.

Desperately, Esther wanted to rush forward, smack it out of his hands, punch him, hug him… Do something to him. But she was frozen in place. Her jacket fell to the floor by her feet.

“Nice place.” Jason turned his head to look at her, eyes sweeping over her body. He bit the inside of his cheek as Jason took in the sight of her: Rosy cheeks, disheveled hair, and dressed like she had someone to impress. “And it’s rude to stare.” He said.

There was no helping that. How could she not stare at him? Esther had once believed she would never see his face again, those green eyes, that mischievous smile. He looked exactly as she remembered, and yet, a little bit different. Jay’s black hair now flaunted a white patch just above his left eyebrow, and he looked somehow even taller than she recalled. Maybe even… a little older?

Esther tried to muster words, something, anything. But nothing came. Instead, Esther quietly closed the door and dropped her bag on the floor next to her jacket. Her body swayed a little as she stepped towards him, her legs unsure.

This didn’t go unnoticed by Jason, who set his drink down on the floor. “Have you been drinking? Jesus, Essie, I’d hoped you’d spent the day resting.” His words landed on deaf ears as Esther took a few more slow strides until she stood inches away from him. Jason was completely facing her now, looking down to see her eyes wide and her lips parted. A part of him worried she was in shock again.

Esther’s fingers gradually rose, her breath hitching as they grazed his cheek. His eyes never once looked away from hers as she traced the white ‘J’ on the right side of his jaw. 

Finally, as her flesh touched his, the words came out. “Jason?” It wasn’t much, just his name, but Jason’s eyes fluttered. He’d almost forgotten how sweet his name sounded, rolling off her tongue. God, she smelled like alcohol, but no part of his body complained. Rather the opposite, actually.

“Hey, Cabbage.” His tone was playful, and Jason’s ears rejoiced at the sound of a half-laugh falling from her lips. In the darkly lit room, however, Jay could see that despite her laugh, Essie’s lower lip was quivering, tears threatening to fall from her eyes. “Why the long face?” He teased.

Esther hesitantly pulled her hands back from him, her skeptical mind winning for a moment, “Tell me something only Jason Todd could possibly know.”

The Red Hood loomed over her, holding her gaze, “The field trip to Metropolis-”

“Okay!” Esther interrupted, her face turning a deep shade of scarlet. She could feel herself sobering up a bit, her brain fighting to take back control, especially at the mention of that horrendous day, “Okay, it’s you.” Her breath faltered at the words, and she bit back tears, “It’s really you.”

Jason Todd stood in front of her after so long of wishing and longing for him.

But he looked away, suddenly unable to meet her watery eyes, guilt eating away at him, “I know what you’re going to say, Esther. How could I be alive? How could I keep it a secret from you?” She must be furious at him; Jason wouldn’t be surprised if she started cursing him out. Honestly, he hoped she did. Watching her stare at him in silence was killing him, “Say something; I know you’re mad-”

He stumbled back as Esther flung herself against his body, her arms wrapping tightly around his midriff. “Red,” Her voice was muffled into his chest, “My Red.” The pitch of her voice gave away that she was crying, and Jason frowned. 

Essie didn’t care that Jason had hidden from her? He couldn’t believe it, yet all Jason could hear in her voice was relief. Joy. Comfort. Jason’s frown relaxed, and he tightened his grip on her body, drowning his face in her soft black hair. The smell of her was intoxicating, especially after so long without it.

Her feet left the ground as Jason lifted her up, spinning her gently until a laugh bubbled up out of his chest. Jay laughed with her, his thoughts stilling for the first time in months as he held her in his arms. 

When Jason set her down, Esther had a hard time pulling away. Part of her was afraid that if she let him go, she would turn away and he’d evaporate. Instead, she opted to hold his cheeks in her palms, grinning up at him with tears running down her cheeks.

Gloves hit the floor as he pulled them off to wipe the salt water from her face, “What prick made you cry, Essie? I’ll kick his ass.” The corner of his lips curled up in a teasing smile.

Essie laughed again. She’d laughed more in the past few minutes than she had in months. “How?” Was all she could muster to ask.

Jason sighed, gripping her shoulders and bringing her to sit down on the edge of her bed. He pulled the chair from her desk and placed it, so he was facing her, their knees touching and hands interlocking again.

Their friendship had always been exceptionally touchy, but now Esther couldn’t bear to not have some part of him connected to her. 

“It’s… complicated.” Jason chewed on his lip, looking down at the ground. “I- I don’t really know where to start.”

“You died; start there.” Esther pressed, and Jason squinted.

“Well, see, that’s why it’s hard. Cause it technically started before then.” Esther stared at him expectantly and Jason continued, “It was them. The League of Shadows.”

The girl’s eyes narrowed at the mention of the League. They had been nothing but a source of pain and suffering in her life, and if she found out that they had something to do with all this, she wouldn’t rest until every last one of them was dead.

Jason saw the shift in her face, and he squeezed her hands, “Hold on, let me explain.” He said, “When we got taken, Ra’s al Ghul was in Gotham looking into some things. I guess Bruce was giving him too much trouble,” He spat Bruce’s name like a curse word. “So Ra’s needed a distraction. He was advised that Joker was the only one who could entertain Batman for an extended amount of time. But the Joker went off script and took us as his way of occupying Bruce. He probably didn’t realize how little we actually mean to that fucker.” Jason hissed.

Esther couldn’t say she blamed Jason for his strong feelings toward Bruce. After all, Esther, to this day, still wrestled with her anger towards her brother. And Jason didn’t even know about the Tim situation. It was probably better that he didn't.

His fingers toyed with hers, and she noticed a white line circling his middle finger. Wait, that had been the finger that Joker cut off. Was it… back? The line was definitely a scar, but if Esther remembered correctly, Joker had fed the finger to the rats. Her nimble fingers traced the white ring gently. 

“When I… died, Ra’s swapped my body out a few days after the funeral. And, well…” Jason looked away, his leg shaking nervously, “He… dipped me into his Lazurus pit.”

The room went silent as Esther’s stomach flipped. So Jason really had died. And Ra’s al Ghul had brought him back. The pupils of her eyes fluctuated, and her gaze darkened, “But why? Ra’s doesn’t let just anyone use those pits.”

“It wasn’t in his plan for Joker to take us. He felt guilty, I guess.” Jason’s answer almost made her laugh. Ra’s al Ghul never felt guilty. But Jason seemed almost like he was… defending him.

Esther’s eyes widened, “So it’s true, you’re working for him, aren’t you?” His lack of an answer was all she needed, “Jason, Ra’s is a psychopath. I don’t know what he’s been telling you, but-”

Jason sighed in frustration, “It’s not what he’s told me.” His tone grew cold, “It’s what he did.” His eyes narrowed as anger filled his chest, “Bruce let us suffer in there. He let me watch you wither away; let me wither away. He did nothing.” His voice was poisonous, “I’m only alive because of Ra’s.”

“Yeah, but I don’t understand. Ra’s riled Joker up and then unclipped him from his leash, and now you’re working for him?” Jason’s lip stiffened at her words, and he dropped her hands. “Jason,” Esther’s fingers reached up and stroked the hair hanging in front of his face, her tone softening in an attempt to keep him calm, “You’re alive; that’s all I should ask for.” And, of course, Jay melted into her. How could he not? “But I need to know that there’s a game plan to all of this. A reason. ‘Cause I can’t say that it’s making much sense as of right now.”

The touch of her fingers in his hair was like ecstasy. Everything felt different than before his ‘death.’ Esther had been his best friend for so long, but he’d never really realized what he meant to her. Jason had watched from a distance as she fell apart, only to rebuild herself into something stronger. To see this level of relief in her eyes, to know what lengths she had gone through to get revenge in his name… He bit his lip in hesitancy.

“I just… Need to see some things through.” Jason relented but was quick to add, “But I… You can’t get involved.” Esther dropped her hands, Jay flinching at the sudden loss. Her expression told him everything, “I can’t tell you everything right now; it would only put you in danger.”

“Put me in danger?” Esther stood up from the bed and began pacing the room, “You of all people should know that that doesn’t concern me.” Her face was one that was more familiar to him now: stubborn. It almost made him smile. “None of this makes any sense. Ra’s brought you back to life and has you playing gangster in the streets. He sicked the Joker on us to distract Bruce, but now he’s just buying up fucking bakeries around the city? Like he's playing fucking Cooking Mama? I don’t buy it.”

Pushing the seat back as he stood as well, Jason suddenly looked agitated, “Essie, you need to stop looking into all of this.” He said firmly, “I’m serious. No more.” Jason closed his eyes, coming to the conclusion that coming here may have been a bad idea. It had been selfish, but he’d just so desperately wanted to see her. 

“Why won’t you just let me come with you? I could help. Whatever it is that you’re trying to work out, Jason, I want to go with you.” Esther instinctively grabbed his hands, but he immediately tore them from her grasp. 

“I… can’t get involved with you, Essie.” Jason swallowed hard, turning his back on her, making it as though he was going to leave. “It’s better for you if we pretend you never knew I was alive.”

Esther’s heart plummeted. He was going to leave her again? Just like that? Was it really so easy for him? Her words left her lips before she could even hope to stop them.

 “Does that mean you don’t feel anything for me anymore?” The words hung in the air, Jay’s shoulders tensing up immediately. “I mean… I get it if you don’t… It’s been a long time, and so much is different. I just- It’s just that… what you said on day seventy-two, do you not feel that way anymore?”

The atmosphere felt like she could cut it with her khopesh. Jason turned around slowly, his lips curled up in an almost angry smirk. “Sometimes, Essie, your stupidity surprises even me.” Okay, ouch. That stung until Esther looked into his eyes and saw some mischievous fire burning inside them. “You really think that I’d go this long loving you, and something as trivial as dying could change the way I feel about you?”

His words melted her heart into a dripping, hot mess. He loved her. Jason Todd still loved her. After all this time. After all, that had changed. Through life and through death. He wanted her. The remains of her liquified heart leaked through her body and pooled in the pit of her stomach, twisting and turning there as her body reacted physically to what he’d said.

“But I just… I can’t, Essie. If I let you near me, you could really end up hurt. I don’t know when this will all be over, but… I don’t think I can see you again until it is for your own safety. There are a lot of things I’m willing to risk. But not you. Never you.” Jay’s tone had softened considerably, concern dripping off of his tongue. To hear him speak like this, in a way she’d never heard him talk to her before… Maybe it was the alcohol still running through her blood, but suddenly it felt like Esther’s skin was on fire.

Jay turned away again, unable to look her in the eyes.

Esther hated that. She hated every time he looked away. It wasn’t even twenty-four hours ago that Esther believed those eyes were gone forever. Esther didn’t want to lose sight of that forest green ever again. And for the past year that Jason had been gone, there’d been something that had been nagging the back of her head.

“I can’t do it again.” Her words came out quiet but clear. Yet, again, they stopped Jay dead in his tracks. When he turned back to Esther, there was a desperate look in her gray eyes. Jason studied her, silently wondering why he liked that subtly indignant expression on her pretty face. And not in a decent way.

“Do what?” Jason asked, his heart beating hard against his chest.

“I can’t go back to wondering what it would feel like to be loved by you.” It took every ounce of her courage to say those words. Esther was never the one to initiate anything, but she’d believed that opportunity to be missed, and now that she knew it wasn’t, Esther craved the chance to learn. “I’ve thought about it every day for over a year. Please,” She begged, “Don’t ask me to go back to that hell.”

Jason’s whole body was stiff as he watched her. He could hardly believe his ears. Never in his life did he think he would hear Esther Wayne beg for him. Jay could hear the blood rushing in his ears. 

“Stop.” His eyelids drooped slightly; Jay’s resolve was not strong when it came to her. He could feel his pulse all over his body. “You can’t- Don’t do this to me.” His fingers ran through his black hair, tugging at his nape as if trying to ground himself.

But Esther saw it all. She was so close to getting what she wanted, and her body seemed to know it as Essie’s arms moved of their own accord; Esther’s fingers reached up and twisted behind her back, Jason watching every movement. A second later, the bralette that had been her top this evening hung loosely from her shoulders, the clasp in the back now undone and useless. “Please, Red,” That damned nickname, “Show me.”

And just like that, whatever fight Jason had left in him crumbled. “Fuck this.”

He’d waited too fucking long for this moment as he strode forward and crashed his lips onto hers. Jay’s arms pulled Essie’s body impossibly close to his, his muscles flexing as his fingers dug into the skin of her back.

Jason’s lips devoured her, and Essie arched her back to match his same energy. Fuck, the way his tongue swept against her bottom lip made her wonder what other places she wanted his tongue to be. 

As Jay kissed her forcefully, he pushed her backward, the fingers behind her back pausing their exploration to rip the straps of her bra from her shoulders. The moment her chest was bare Jay froze once more, drinking this moment in.

How many times had he touched himself imagining this exact moment? How many nights had Jason hidden beneath his sheets, thinking about how perfect her tits probably were as he fucked into his own hand? 

And younger Jason had been right. They were perfect. His rough fingers ran over her soft rose petals, Essie’s nipples stiffening at their slightest touch.

The desire to be touched by Jason was only building; Esther pushed herself into his palms, biting her bottom lip as she watched him soak in the vision of her bare breasts. She was becoming painfully aware of her quickly soaked panties.

This desire didn’t go unnoticed. Jay smirked down at her; her tits looked small and delicate against his big hands. “You think you’re so fucking clever.” He spat at her, his breathing thick and heavy, “You always get whatever the fuck you want.”

Esther’s hands sprawled against his chest, and she breathed out a soft “I want you.” That was all the consent he needed as he pulled the hair at the back of her head, forcing her to look up at him into his beautiful emerald eyes that she had missed more than anything.

Jay leaned down and let his lips and nose brush against the tender skin of her exposed neck and clavicle, “Then that’s what you’re going to fucking get.” His tone was low and gravelly; his words were a promise that he was more than willing to keep.

His free hand hooked into her pants and let them drop down to expose the pair of panties she’d been wearing. Jay’s eyes darkened. He could see the outline of her pussy against the thin, seamless undies. 

With a soft push against her shoulders, Esther fell back against her mattress. Her eyes glimmered in the darkness as Jason peeled his top from his body. A look of shame crossed his expression for a moment, which she didn’t understand until her gaze trailed downwards. 

Scars. From their torture but also an enormous t-shaped scar etched across his massive chest. The autopsy stitches. Essie’s eyes followed the white lines downwards. His body, despite the markings, oozed sex appeal. It was perfectly sculpted, and Esther bit back a whine.

The embarrassed look on Jay’s face dropped immediately as he watched Esther pull her bottom lip between her teeth, look up at him innocently, and slowly open her legs until her covered center was completely exposed to him. A clear invitation.

Jay growled, “You want me to wreck you, don’t you?” He sat on the edge of the bed after she nodded, and he forcibly grabbed her legs to pull her until she was laid out belly down across his lap. “Okay, sweetness, but remember, you asked for it.” 

He was so dominant. Esther wasn’t used to it, but she’d be lying if she said she didn’t love how he was manhandling her. Jason threw her around like she weighed nothing to him, driving Essie wild. 

His one arm snaked around her neck, steadying her against his chest as he brought his other hand to her face and traced her lips with his middle finger, “Suck.” He commanded, and Esther immediately obeyed, closing her eyes as she did. “Fuck. My little wild thing is being such a good girl for me.” Jay pulled his finger from her mouth and brought it down to her inner thighs, which Esther gladly parted for him. There was a little dark spot in the middle of her nude panties; her arousal getting the better of her.

Deciding he’d help relieve her a little, Jay pushed her underwear to the side and (pausing first to lick his lips at the sight of her pretty little pussy) sank his middle finger slowly and sensually into her cunt. Esther’s breath sucked in at finally being touched, where she craved it the most.

Her warmth surrounded his finger and Jason suddenly became very aware of how tight his pants were. Truthfully, his cock was aching, but there was nothing he wanted more in this world tonight than to see this woman’s body absolutely writhing around him, so that would just have to wait. Wait just a little bit longer.

 Esther made a sound like a sigh of relief as he gently finger fucked her, her back arching up in satisfaction. Jason added another finger and sped up his pace, kissing Essie’s head as her body tensed. When his fingers curled inside her, Esther gasped, “Fuck.” She whispered, but Jay heard it.

“What was that?” Jason smirked, pausing his movements. Esther whimpered, and his grin only grew. “Did you have something you wanted to say?”

The lack of his fingers made Esther huff in frustration. This body had not been touched in an impossibly long time, and it hungered for release. “Red,” Jay’s dick twitched at the sound of his nickname, “Please.”

That begging was enough for him. Jay happily pushed his fingers into her dripping wet pussy, not so worried about being gentle anymore, his rough skin offering sweet relief, “Use your words, Essie, or I’ll stop.” His pace slowed down, and she knew he wasn’t bluffing.

But it was so hard to breathe, let alone speak. Essie was putty in his arms, her fingers digging into his skin, Jason could see her face turning red as Esther’s hips jutted in attempts to match his pace, those rosy, flustered cheeks drove him wild. “Please,” She started again, a strand of her hair falling into her face, “Jason, please just fuck me,” she whined with a desperation he could almost feel. The weight of her words dug deep into his chest, lighting up a red-hot desire that he could have only Dreamt of feeling.

How could he possibly turn her down? 

Jason grabbed her by the waist, threw Essie off his lap, and pinned her down on the bed, her naked body pressed against the disheveled sheets. “I waited so long to hear you beg for me.” He groaned, using his knee to spread her legs underneath him. “I prayed so many times to show you what you were missing.”

“Show me.” Her voice was a raspy whimper laced with lust for the massive man above her.

Esther was desperate to feel his thick fingers roughly going in and out of her weeping cunt, her eyes looking up at him from beneath her dark lashes. God, she looked so pretty and fuckable. Jason ducked his head down, kissing a trail from her jaw down her chest; His tongue left a wet track on her skin, the cool air turning it electric. When Jay’s lips reached her tits, they had hardened and were surrounded by goosebumps.

That was it; Jason couldn’t take the strain of his dick against his pants. As he latched his lips onto her tender tit, Jay maneuvered his pants off and kicked them to the floor, now in nothing but his boxers, and even that was uncomfortable now.

Kissing down her midriff, Jason peeled his boxers off just as he came face to face with Esther’s sweet cunt. She was so gorgeous and perfect that he could just stare at her pussy for hours. His eyes glimmered as he looked up at her, his tongue slid across his upper lip achingly slowly, and Esther watched in strained anticipation. “Good thing you're a rich girl,” Jason smirked before tearing her panties to shreds in his massive hands.

There wasn’t even a moment to protest before Jay had latched his mouth to her wet folds, his eyes fluttering shut at her sweet taste on his tongue. God, this was better than he’d ever imagined it. Jason flexed his fingers roughly into the skin of her thigh as he held her open for him. 

Esther’s feet pointed into a beautiful arch as her body squirmed at Jason’s tongue. She’d been eaten out before, but this… fuck. Jason acted as though this was his first meal in months and planned on savoring every moment.

“O-Oh shit.” Essie’s lips pouted as Jason slipped a finger into her warm cunt, her hands falling to grip his skunk-striped hair. That drove him fucking wild, his eyes snapping open to gaze up at her. And holy shit, was she a sight to see, her cream thighs squeezing around him. Her mouth fell open in a silent moan.

Silent wasn’t good enough for Jason. He wanted Essie to wake up the nuns sleeping on the bottom floor. 

Jay’s tongue darted out and licked a long stripe along her pussy, the sensation drawing a sweet cry from Esther’s mouth. Jason was sure she was pulling his hair from his head, but that’s exactly how he wanted it.

His patience was running out as Jason’s cock dripped pre-cum onto the bed sheet beneath him. With a single push of his arms, Jay was at eye level with Essie again, interlocking their lips in a passionate kiss. Jay made sure she was able to taste her breathtaking pussy through the kiss. His breath hitched as her soft fingers traced his chest, so unused to the feeling of such caresses.

When they broke from their kiss, the head of Jason’s was pushing against her wet folds. Jason paused, “I should have asked this sooner, but… uh, do you… have a condom?”

“No.” Esther had an impish smile on her swollen lips, eyes sparkling, “I have an IUD.”

“Uh, a what?” Jason kissed the corner of Essie’s lips, loving that sly little smirk she wore. 

Essie's expression was sultry and innocent at the same time. Jay had never seen anything like it. It made his cock twitch in anticipation as she brought her lips to his ear and whispered, “It means… that you can come inside me.” Her voice was like honey on fire, Sweet and hot.

A growl fell from Jason’s mouth as his Cock achingly throbbed in anticipation, and his large hands closed around her neck, “I was fucking hoping you’d say that.” His fingers tightened, tracing her lips with the rough pad of his thumb. 

Jason’s other hand guided the head of his cock to her entrance, pausing to rub his tip against her clit. Electricity shot through Esther’s body as she let out the most beautiful and erotic moan he had ever heard. She pulled her lip between her teeth. Truthfully, she was nervous, Jason was… a lot bigger than she’d ever pictured… or experienced (Sorry Dick, but it’s true).

As if Jay sensed her hesitation, his thumb stroked her skin, and he placed a kiss on her pouty lips, “Relax, you can take it.”

Fuuuuuck. Essie nodded, knowing little else other than the fact that she needed Jason to be inside her. And he was going to oblige her.

The head of his thick cock pushed past her wet folds slowly, Jay’s eyes squeezing shut as he lost himself in the feeling of his dick being hugged by her tight cunt. “That’s it, sweetheart.” He groaned, already breathless, and Esther whimpered in pleasure at how full she felt. “Doin’ so good for me.” Jay opened his eyes as he bottomed out in her with an almost animalistic growl and took in the sight in front of him.

The bed sheets were sticking to Esther’s skin, and a thin layer of sweat covered every inch of flesh; her body glistened like fine silk. Essie’s hair had a damp look to it, sticking to her rosy face. Essie’s brows were scrunched up as she moaned out, “Jay-” Jason wanted nothing more than to sweep her into his arms and run away into the night with her forever. “Please, fuck me.”

Not losing a moment, Jason snapped his hips, eliciting a gasp from Esther, a gasp that turned into a low groan as he fucked into her roughly. Jay was losing his mind at the feeling of her tight walls around him. He couldn't compare the feeling of his longtime crush to anything else. “Oh, you feel even better than I imagined.” The words slipped from his lips, and Esther could barely process them as her body writhed underneath him.

He filled her up so well, hitting every spot inside her that she desperately needed him to. When Jason brought his fingers to play with her clit, Esther’s back lifted off the mattress, and her fingers clawed at his back. Jason didn’t mind a few more scars if they were from her. “Jason…” She couldn’t even finish her thought as he picked up his pace, and a string of curses tumbled from her tongue as she struggled to keep her mind from turning into mush as Jason's fat cock destroyed her insides in the best way possible.

“You like it hard, don’t you?” Jason smirked and decided he would give her exactly what she wanted. He adjusted his position, using both his hands to hold her hips up off the sheets before pounding into her harshly.

The new angle made her stomach twist, and Esther practically screamed Jason’s name, clamping her hand over her own mouth in an attempt to stay quiet. The sound of his cock penetrating her dripping cunt was absolutely sinful, and Esther felt her head go cloudy. “That feels so fucking good, Red.” 

“Yea?” Jason grunted, slowing his movements, “I feel good?” Those innocent eyes never left his as Essie nodded. A devilish smile formed on his face as he rutted slowly and deeply into her, “Better than Dick?”

His words caught Esther by surprise, and she felt fire erupt in her blood, but just as Jay asked it, his slow penetrating stopped, and suddenly he was fucking her into the mattress, his hips snapping mercilessly against her. Esther struggled for breath, struggled to think. Jason was literally fucking the thoughts from her brain. “I, uh- oh, fuck- Jason!” Esther buried her face into his shoulder, whining against the sticky hot skin. She could feel her legs shaking around him.

His unrelenting pounding was all Essie could focus on until he released one hand from her hip to smack against her thigh, the sting sending waves through her core. “Am I, sweetheart? Am I fucking you better than he did?” Esther’s mouth fell open in silent moans, “I shared a wall with that fucker,” He spoke through his own heavy breaths, “How many times did I hear you two, knowing I could do it better.” Jay used his free hand to go back to his ministrations on her clit, Esther biting into her fingers to keep from screaming again. “Did he fuck you like this, Essie?”

“No!” Esther cried as her climax quickly approached, “No, Jason!” She squeaked, “You fuck me better. You fuck me so perfect.” Jason almost came right then and there; he fucking knew it. And he waited so long for her to admit it. He bit his lip and dropped her onto the mattress to pin her thighs to the bed with his hands. The sudden change in position was the last straw for Essie, “Jay, Red, I’m gonna cum!”

“Cum, sweetheart. Cum for me.” Jay felt Esther suddenly clamp her thighs around his body, her body lifting off the bed as she writhed in ecstasy. Her pussy pulsed and clamped around his cock, and Jason sucked his breath in through his teeth as he leaned down and grunted into her neck, “Fuck, Essie.” Her moans didn’t stop because neither had Jason. He was fucking her right through her orgasm. 

Those gray eyes fluttered open, and he pushed the hair from her face, “Jay, please, cum inside me.” She begged, her fingers lacing into the hair at the nape of his neck.

With pleasure. Jason thought as he rutted into her just a few more times before groaning loudly and emptying his load deep inside her. Essie almost wanted to cum again at the feeling of his warmth spreading inside her, at the sight of Jason’s eyes squeezed shut, at the sound of squelching as Jason fucked her until his cum dripped onto the blankets. 

He came for an impossibly long time; even as he pulled himself from her spent pussy, ropes of cum shot into her. Esther drew him in for a sloppy kiss, their bodies molding together in blissful completion. “Fuck.” Jason mumbled into the pillow behind her, shifting his body, so he wasn’t crushing her, but he left his fingers tangled in her hair. “I’d say you’re going to be the death of me, but you already were.” 

It felt like her body was nothing but a puddle, but Esther laughed at his stupid joke. “You prick.” But her tone dripped with affection. Her neck couldn’t even support her head as it lulled to the side. Her eye caught on the Rockstar Jason had placed earlier on the ground, “How long did you tease me about liking the red one?” She grumbled, and Jason chucked.

“It goes with my suit.” He smirked, and Esther rolled her eyes. “Which,” Jason sighed, “I have to put back on.”

A frown etched itself onto Esther’s face, “Why?” Her arms tightened around his waist, and Jason wished more than anything that he could stay and make love to her all night.

“I’ve got an appointment with someone. I’m already late.” He rubbed at his face in exhaustion before sitting up and grabbing a t-shirt from the ground to wipe Esther off. “Trust me, if I didn’t have to be there, I’d be here with you.”

As Jay grabbed his suit and began to dress himself, Essie huffed, sitting up as well, “I’m coming with you-”

“No.” Jay’s tone was firm, not that that scared Essie. “I knew you’d say that.” His voice softened as he unclipped something from his suit and handed it to her. It looked like some kind of chip, “You need to sleep, you GMO-riddled broccoli.” She shot him a death glare which he ignored as he took the chip back and installed it onto her phone, “This is connected to my suits life support systems. If you get worried, you can look, and it will show you I’m okay.” Jay tossed the phone onto her lap.

Her phone lit up and showed the blank screen of a heart rate and blood pressure monitor. As Jason zipped up his suit, the screen suddenly came to life with his stats. “I could just follow you.” Esther griped, and Jason rolled his eyes. He knew she wouldn’t; Essie looked absolutely destroyed. A fact he was pretty proud of. “What if you need to make a quick getaway?” She challenged.

“I’ve got a bike for that.” Jason downed the rest of his previously forgotten drink and clipped on all of his weapons. “I’ve been doing this alone for months, Essie, just like you. But if I think you’re out there trying to find me, I won’t be able to focus. And then I will get hurt.” Jay knelt by the side of the bed, “I promise you, I will be here when you wake up.” He pressed a kiss to Esther’s warm forehead, his hands stroking her naked thigh before laying a blanket sweetly over her.

Essie grumbled in defeat, holding her phone close to her chest, “Fine.”

“Good girl.” Jason grinned, standing up and walking to the latch that led to the bell tower, “I’ll bring you back a menorah. I’m shocked you don’t already have one.” His voice shifted as he put his mask on, the voice scrambler activating. “We’re four days into Hanukkah already, you poser.”

His jab made Esther laugh into her pillow; her eyes suddenly felt so, so heavy. “It’s called a hanukkiyah.” She grumbled, barely hearing what Jason Todd said before disappearing from the room.

“I missed you so much, Esther Wayne.”

…

Once again, Esther was stirred from her peaceful sleep by the warm beams of sunlight that flooded through the small stained glass window at the apex of the roof. This time, however, Esther felt no urge to stay asleep. Because this time, Jason Todd would be in bed next to her.

Essie reached out her arm and searched for the other body that was supposed to be in bed with her. But all she found were empty sheets. Her eyes shot open and Esther sat up in an instant, scanning the bed and then the room.

There was no sign of Jason. No indication that he’d even returned that morning. Her breathing went rapid as Esther swallowed hard. Jason Todd never broke promises. Not once in all her years of knowing him. 

Snatching her phone from where it had laid beside her in her sleep, Esther flicked it on and felt the blood freeze in her veins as the screen blinked red and showed dangerously chaotic vitals. Vitals that were dropping.

Fuck.

tags: @niphredil-14 @honeybee54321

[carminavulcana]

The Toy

For the prompt Lady Catherine Buxton X Toys for @ladydarkey

Women like her were born women. Toys were for little girls.

Women like her were expected to make good marriages. Women like her maintained their looks, coiffed their hair, powdered their cheeks, and dressed themselves in fine gowns with lace petticoats and whalebone corsets underneath.

Women like her wedded for power and wielded it through their husbands.

Jenny had been sent to India with the same purpose, but she had shown no interest in any of her suitors so far.

Instead, she remained absorbed in trying to sing songs for Malli or teaching her to paint and other such nonsense.

Lady Catherine Buxton also did not understand her niece’s strange obsession with buying toys for the little jungle chit that they had brought back from Adilabad. What use did the girl have for toy elephants, lac dolls, and glass beads?

She, Catherine, had never played with these as a child herself. If anything, the sight of toys annoyed her. In fact, she had instructed her own children’s governesses to never give them even a rattle or a teddy bear. Her children, Gordon and Caroline, were the epitome of quality British parenting. And she was proud that all they had had in the way of playthings as children, had been her old books, models of trains, and replicas of great ships of old that had paved the way for the English flag to fly high around the world.

But she allowed her niece the indulgence of toys for Malli. Malli was after all, just a songbird. It was understood that soon after puberty, her pretty nightingale-like voice would darken to the dulcet tones of a woman. And then, she would have to be relegated to the role of a maidservant.

No way was she going to allow a young temptress to live in the palace with herself and her husband. Not when she knew that any fledgling beauty would catch his unfaithful eye.

In fact, she sometimes wondered if it would be better to return Malli to her tribe. After all, she was no longer as interesting or as exotic as she had been in the beginning. However, the knowledge that her tribe’s protector was out there somewhere, looking for her, had put a dent in this thought.

To give up the girl now, would be seen as an act of submission. And that was unthinkable. Even if she had to throw the wretched little brat to the streets, there was no way they were going to return her to her tribe of worthless brown buffoons.

The day her husband was knighted, she felt a great swell of pride in her heart. It was yet another pearl in her chest of treasures. She could hardly wait to return to England for the summer and gloat about it.

But before that, she was excited for the celebration she had planned here in Delhi. It would be an affair to remember for years to come. Her dress, of the heaviest brocade from Benares, bright as a drop of sunshine, would be the talk of the town for the entire season.

It was a blow to her like no other, thus, when her extravagant gala was put to an abrupt end by the appearance of the beastly tribal with his pack of wild animals.  As she hurried inside to the safety of the rose garden in the inner chamber, she heard Malli call out for him.

“ANNA…..”

Her blood boiled! The little titch! How dare she?

Eventually, as the dust settled upon the arrival of her husband, she swore that this time, she would ensure that an example was made out of the so-called shepherd.

As she sat high up in her balcony, she felt something deep stir within herself; an almost childlike joy that she had forgotten even existed. She wanted to watch the toy before her break and bleed and beg.

It irked her that despite the bloody gashes peeking through the torn folds of his shirt, there was hardly any blood at his feet. And how dare he not scream?

She had a toy to break other toys, didn’t she?

It took her but a moment to grab the whip that she knew was never meant to be used against another human being. She had been told as much by the fashioner of the whip when he had presented it to her in London.

“This will look very nice on the wall in the governor’s study, right alongside the head of that magnificent antelope he shot last autumn. Of course, it is just a piece of decoration… can’t be used for real unless you want to use it to shred the meat for your beef casserole….”

The shepherd was hardly a man, was he? Why couldn’t she have the pleasure of seeing her dangerous, beautiful toy in action on something that wasn’t even human.

And that too, in the service of the crown!

“OFFICER,” She called out just as the mustachioed man raised his bullwhip again. “Try this one!” she smirked and threw the barbed bullwhip down. “Use it on the pillar first, officer! Let the wretch see how it will rip him!”

Giddy with pleasure, she sat down and watched as the thorns on the whip sank into the wood and tore out numerous chips and splinters from it.

Her mouth salivated as the new whip whistled through the air and landed with a sickening splatch into the skin and muscles of the beast.

Oh, she was finally enjoying herself. And to think, it was all because of the stupid girl she had been thinking of returning!

How could she have even thought such a thing! Thanks to the girl, she was watching a spectacle that she had never seen before. The beast could sing all he wanted! At some point, he would fall to his knees.

And there would be not just blood, but also screams.

Women like her were born women. Toys were for little girls.

Or so she had thought.

She had finally found a toy she liked very much, especially as it bled and quivered and cried out in torment.

It would bend eventually; she was sure of it. Or else, it would break.

Either way, she would relish it. What a wonderful way to celebrate her husband’s knighting!

@vidhurvrika @bleedinknight @fangirlshrewt97 @rambheemlove @rambheem-is-real @burningsheepcrown

@kookiries @iam-siriuslysher-lokid @fadedscarlets @hufhkbgg @connerwrites @rorapostsbl @ronaldofandom @ronika-writes-stuff @pine-breeze

@bromance-minus-the-b @obsessedtoafault @jrntrtitties @tulodiscord @rambheemisgoated @dumdaradumdaradum @sulthaaan @stanleykubricks @mizutaama @thewinchestergirl1208 @jadebomani @sally-for-sally @waywardmorgan @annieginny @voidsteffy @stuckyandlarrystuff @meastradeur

@mesimpleone @filesbeorganized @doodlesofthelastpage @badtabbywhitecat @bitchy-bi-trash @braveheartinthedark @yonderghostshistories @veteran-fanperson @yehsahihai

@eenadu-varthalu @budugu @ssabriel @teddybat24 @chaanv @jjwolfesworld @milla984 @boochhaan

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[leahnardo-da-veggie]

There! Right there!

Liam strolled through the street, hat tilted down to conceal his face. Then he heard it.

“There! Right there!”

The voice was familiar, self-assured and high-pitched. A silhouette appeared, standing atop of one of the shophouses. “Shit,” Liam hissed. “Not again.”

“Look at that tan, well-tended skin,” the voice he knew to be Rhonda's continued. Liam adjusted his coat to cover himself and began walking faster.

“Look at the killer shape he's in,” Rhonda sang. “Look at that slightly stubbly chin, oh please-”

Liam clenched his fist. “Rhonda, shut the fuck up!”

“He's gay, totally gay!” The resonance of her voice made the passerby turn to look, and Liam felt himself cringe in horror. 

“I'm not about to celebrate,” a woman in the crowd said, flipping her cowl down to reveal red hair and a sly grin. “Every trait could indicate-”

Liam started running. This was so incredibly, utterly ridiculous. Why him, of all people? He wasn't even all that gay! 

“A totally straight expatriate, this guy's not gay, I say no way,” Olive continued, stepping in front of him to block him. She laughed at his horrified expression.

From the crowd, a circle formed, and began chanting, “That is the elephant in the room! Well, is it relevant to assume: That a man who wears perfume is automatically, radically fey?” 

Liam cursed under his breath. He'd only sprayed a few drops of cologne today; It wasn't a big deal! “Stop it, guys,” he snapped.

“But look at his coiffed and crispy locks,” Daphne sung, winking at him. “Look at his silk translucent socks.”

What was these people's problem with him dressing nicely? The socks were perfectly fine! And if he took good care of his hair, was that such a bad thing?

“There's the eternal paradox- Look what we're seein',” she added.

“What are we seeing?” Gloria, Daphne's partner in crime, butted in. Her green eyes met his, and she grinned.

“Is he gay…” 

“Of course he's gay!”

“Or Nyctomachian?” Olive finished with a flourish.

“Huh,” the Oracles all said in unison, peering at him.

“Gay or Nyctomachian? It's hard to guarantee,” they sung, twirling in place around him. “Is he gay or Nyctomachian?”

“Well hey, don't look at me,” Rhonda chirped.

“You see, they bring those boys up different in those charming foreign ports,” she explained.

“Nyctomachia’s not that foreign,” he hissed, still trying to find a way out of the circle.

“They play peculiar sports-” Rhonda gestured for everyone to join in.

“In shiny shirts and tiny shorts!”

“Gay or just exotic? I still can't crack the code,” Gloria crooned. 

“Yea, his accent is hypnotic but his shoes are pointy toed,” Daphne agreed. 

Liam scowled at her. Pointy-toed shoes said nothing about gayness. Women wore pointy-toed shoes all the time!

“Gay or Nyctomachian? So many shades of gray!”

Rhonda leaped off the rooftop to land in the center of the circle, right beside Liam. “But if he turns out straight, I'm free at eight on Saturday,” she announced with a wink.

“I'd not date you if you were the last person alive,” Liam snarled, crossing his arms.

Rhonda stepped back, and the rest of the circle stepped forward, closing in on him. “Is he gay or Nyctomachian? Gay or Nyctomachian? Gay or Nycto-”

“Wait a minute! Give me a chance to crack this guy,” Olive announced. “I have an idea I'd like to try…”

“The floor is yours,” Angel, at the head of the circle, announced. They all stepped back, leaving Liam and Olive to glare at each other.

“So… Mr Jacett,” Olive began, pacing around him. “Your alleged affair with Miss Sabrina has been going on for?”

Liam gave her a distrustful glance. “Two years,” he told her.

“And your first name is?”

Where was she leading with this? “Liam,” he said cautiously.

“And your boyfriend's name is?”

Liam winced. He knew exactly what was going to happen, and even as he tried to keep his mouth shut, he said, “Petras.”

They all gasped in mock horror. “I'm sorry,” he said exhaustedly, letting the flow of the song take him. “I misunderstand! You said ‘boyfriend’, I thought you said ‘Best Friend'! Petras is my… best friend.”

He waited for the gasp, and it didn't disappoint. “You bastard!” Petras forced his way to the center of the circle. “You lying bastard! That's it, I won't cover for you, no more! Peoples, I have a big announcement!”

Liam rolled his eyes. “This man is gay and Nyctomachian! And neither is disgrace! You've got to stop; You're being a completely closet case,” Petra's chided. “It's really not hard to see- No matter what he says, I swear he never ever ever swung the other way.”

Liam placed his hands on his face. Why him? Why now? This eternal farce just never seemed to end? Stupid reader, still continuing to scroll through this damn thing. And stupid godsdamn writer for even thinking this was funny.

“You are so gay, you big parfait, you flaming one-man cabaret,” Petras continued.

“I'm straight,” Liam said stubbornly.

“You were not yesterday,” Petras countered. “So if I may, I'm proud to say… He's gay!”

“And Nyctomachian,” the crowd added.

“And he's gay!”

“And Nyctomachian!”

“And he's gay!”

“And Nyctomachian!”

“And gaaaayyyyy!” 

“Fine, okay, I'm gay,” Liam muttered.

“Hooray!” The crowd cheered and clapped.

Liam turned to Rhonda. “I'm sure you found that very funny,” he snapped. “Now, release my boyfriend and hurry up and wipe these people's memories.”

“Aww, but wasn't it such great fun?” Rhonda fluttered her eyes at him.

“It's not gonna work, cos he's gay,” Gloria said, smirking as she walked over. 

“I'm not gay,” Liam replied, out of reflex.

The Oracles stared at him for a moment. Then they began clapping their hands to the beat again. “There, right there,” Daphne began, tauntingly slow.

[desimoviereviews]

Aiyyaa: Cute Movie, Confusing Logic

Follow me on Instagram: @thatguyanesejournalist

Let’s talk about Sachin Kundalkar’s Aiyyaa.

Meenakshi Deshpande, an outspoken and imaginative girl from a conservative family, chases after the man of her dreams while avoiding an arranged engagement/marriage put together by her family.

I can already feel this is going to be a long post. And not in a good way.

See, here’s the synopsis from Rotten Tomatoes (which is the synopsis that pops up on Google when you do a quick search of the film).

“Meenakshi is a drama queen who falls in love with Surya, a Tamil actor. Although she is engaged to another person, she still dreams of getting married to Surya.”

So naturally, I thought this movie was a fleshed-out story about Meenakshi, who is a fangirl, chasing after an actor named Surya and they both fall in love while her parents are setting up her arranged marriage (the music videos did not help in aiding this delusion)

But I wasn’t even close. In fact, that would’ve been a bit more interesting than what the film actually delivers: cuteness, but confusion if you think too hard about the logistics.

Surya is a painter who is given a few lines at best. Also (maybe it’s because we see everything from Meenakshi’s point of view) it doesn’t seem like he’s that interested in her the entire movie until the ending. You see little hints, like him dropping his handkerchief so she could wipe her tears. But, nothing else. I think the director was trying to mimic an actual crush, but it came through for me as Meenakshi daydreaming about a man who isn’t interested (I get you, girl).

Let’s talk about the other elephant in the room: Meenakshi STALKING this man. I understand the obsession, the fake scenarios in your head, and even talking to people who know him because you’re trying to get close to the guy. But not only did she follow him to his house, she:

Interacted with his mother and lied about her actual identity

Stole a shirt from him to smell his scent without him knowing (although you later find out he did know)

Oh, and let’s not forget the detail that she followed him all the way from his house to the incense factory at the end of the movie because she was “curious about him”. I get this movie is supposed to be feminist-forward (she takes charge of her own love life instead of succumbing to an arranged marriage), but I was too distracted by her actions to acknowledge the "women taking agency over themselves" message.

Stalking someone you “like” is definitely creepy no matter what gender you are.

Aside from that, the dialogue was a bit lackluster. One of the only bright sides is Meenakshi's rant (found here). However, the rest was cringy, especially the "Main daru nahi peeta, nahi peeta, nahi peeta" and the "Main bhi nahi peeti, nahi peeti, nahi peeti" lines (I had to pause after I heard that and force myself to keep going).

The soundtrack, composed by Amit Trivedi, lives up to the plot's wackiness and was possibly one of two things that saved the film (Rani was second). But from the man that released “Navrai Majhi” (English Vinglish) and “Jhallah Wallah” (Ishaqzaade) the same year, this movie’s soundtrack underwhelms a bit for me. This was more because I only remember two songs out of the whole set and not because he made mediocre music. The songs are:

Dreamum Wakeuppam (to my South Indians, I'm sorry but it's catchy as hell)

Sava Dollar (Lavani)

The movie is 152 minutes long (2 hours and 32 minutes). If you want to watch a movie that you don’t have to think too hard about, this is it. Stream Aiyyaa on Netflix, grab a snack, and enjoy!

Do you agree or disagree? Let me know in the comments!

[thelivingmemegod]

Thoughts on the Junior High line? (Both series)

Junior High!

Ruby Anderson!

My sweet girl. She was DEEP in her Supreme phase here it’s very cute, it feels very juvenile, I love her necklace, I love her top, side pony, I love her checker sneakers too. Her under sweater with the red and black sleeves and the scrunchie. Her backpack is really cute too. I wish they had these in Rainbow High too (I wish basically everything things set in school had backpacks though, so not new at all lol-)

Poppy Rowan!

Please I’m hyperventilating SHES SO CUTE-

LOOKIT HER ELEPHANT EAR SLEEVES WITH THE BUTTERFLY LIKE PRINT, LOOK AT HER BOWS AND HER FLOWER CHILD BUILT ASS HAIRSTYLE-

LOOK AT HER SHOES THEY’RE SO CUTE-

I love her backpack too! The sparkle print and the monarch butterfly patch are adorable. Her freckles are kicking my ASS it’s so cute

Sunny “this women is gonna end me” Madison!

This jacket, this shirt, this skirt, THESE SOCKS- all the pins and prints I’m- 😭

Her shoessss, her platformsssss I say she still has these platforms in Rainbow High and you cannot take that away from me.

She’s 100% a victim of the see-through backpack thing in America BUT she made the most of it and it’s adorable.

Her hairstyle is just darling, I love the rainbow clips, I love the buns and the curls and HER BABY HAIRSSSS (chokes)

Jade Hunter!

Jade is super cute!

Love the low cut colorblock pants, love the boxers peaking out, love the stripe croptop moment. All of these dolls have been proof that RH is better when they don’t let them make shoes see through. Love the shoes. Her twin ponytails and her scrunchies and her socks (especially the socks cuz you can’t even see them but they’re still awesome)

Once again, the backpack is fire.

Skylar Bradshaw!

Loveeee her sweatshirt, it looks so comfy. Her jirt (I’m sorry for this stupid ass joke I just love it) looks like she took a silver metallic posca marker and went to town on that pocket.

Her lil topknot hair is cute! Love the fact that her hair tie matches the tag she left on her shoe (which is a real trend!) I also really like the checker on the bottom and the printing on her socks. Another See-through backpack girl, at least it’s cute!

Violet Willow!

This boujee bitch went to a private school LOOK AT HER.

Most popular girl there.

The bangs are MUCH better and I love the pigtails with the fluffy hair ties. I love her cardigan, her button down, her plaid skirt, her knee thick’s and the diamond shoes. Her backpack is giving Channel grandmas couch REALNESS

SERIES TWO

Amaya Raine!

ADORABLE. Her sweatshirt is so, sooo cute, her pleated skirt is kinda weird pattern wise but still pretty cute cuz it’s like an add on to the sweater. Those BOOTS ARE THE STAR; YES GIRL YOU ARE FASHION.

Her white hair is really cute and I love the rainbow backing with the gold everywhere.

BACKPACK IS FIRE

Krystal Bailey!

Her lip color aside.

CUTE ASS PUFF HAIRSTYLE WITH THE BABY HAIRS AAHHHHH

Love the printed Jean jacket and skirt and ooooo those boots are HEAT gimmie.

The sorta satchel backpack with that latch is a nice change

Kendall River- 😭

I’m adding him because TELL ME WHY HE DOWNGRADED BETWEEN JUNIOR HIGH AND HIGH SCHOOL.

SEVENTH GRADE HIM LOOKS LIKE THE MOST POPLAR VAUGELY CUTE BOY IN YOUR CLASS THAT LIKE EIGHT GIRLS LIKE ALL AT THE SAME TIME. HE IS THE MESSIEST BOY HERE.

Karma Nichols!

I like this more than the base doll actually- I like the high waisted shorts set in green and white and the jacket and the shoes. She looks sporty and I like that she’s holding her backpack more like a purse.

Sella Monroe!

Girl you needa learn some CONTRAST. But I do like sequin dress, her crown and her t-strap heels they’re cute. Also like her satchel/pure/backpack

Bella Parker

She has no waist but I actually like it for the juvenile look. I like her little bow tie, the black buttons, the straight on bow and high pony, love that she keeps her socks and heels between these two, cute detail. Her bag is also adorable and giving the same realness as Violet.

[quotesfrommyreading]

Sometime in 1598, Jane Bostocke, a young Shropshire gentlewoman, finished a long worked-over project, carefully stitching her designs and lettering into a piece of linen with various coloured silks, and decorating the result with small beads and seed pearls. As well as intricate geometric designs, she carefully stitched a dog with a collar and a lead, as well as a rather more exotic chained bear. She included trees and flowers and a small heraldic lion. It is clear that Jane changed her mind on more than one occasion, carefully unpicking a castle on an elephant, a squirrel cracking a nut and a raven.

Jane intricately stitched the letters of the alphabet, too, before recording her name, the date and the birth of her cousin, Alice Lee, on 'the 23 of November being Tuesday in the afternoon 1596'. She may already have begun the work before her cousin's birth, later deciding to present it to her as a gift. Undoubtedly, the work of stitchery must have taken her many hours of careful work – sometimes by the light of the window, sometimes with a candle burning close at hand. The result is the earliest surviving English sampler that is dated, and it now resides in London's Victoria and Albert Museum.

Upper-class Tudor girls, such as those at Sherriff Hutton, and women such as Jane Bostocke spent much of their time at their needlework. A sampler of the kind on which Jane worked was intended for the beginner, allowing girls and young women to perfect different types of stitching. Another surviving Elizabethan example, by a girl who stitched her name as 'Susan Neeadri', contains the queen's arms and initials accompanied by heraldic beasts. This sampler, which is long and narrow, is extremely intricate, its top panel embroidered in red and gold silk and the second panel in black and silver. The remaining bands were worked with cheaper, linen thread.

Lower down the social scale, too, girls were taught embroidery. Thomasine Wolters, an orphan living in Sandwich, Kent, in the 1580s-90s, was boarded out in the house of a Mistress Smythe. There, she was taught to sew; she later purchased her sampler from her old mistress when she left to marry. The Sandwich Board of Orphans, which oversaw Thomasine's modest inheritance and paid for her maintenance, also periodically purchased silk thread for her work. As well as producing beautiful embroidery, Thomasine had been taught to stitch her own gowns and coifs to cover her hair, and to make lace.

Sewing was, after all, a practical skill. Tudor women commonly made and repaired their own clothing, and even high-born women stitched clothes. Henry VIII's first wife, Catherine of Aragon, was skilled at shirt-making. The future Elizabeth I sent her half-brother, Edward VI, a shirt 'of her own working' as a New Year's gift when she was just six years old. Women frequently made vestments and other items for churches, too. Elizabeth's lady-in-waiting, Blanche Parry, gave an altar cloth that she had made to the church of St Faith's in Bacton in Herefordshire in 1589.

There was nothing unusual in seeing Tudor girls and women of all classes sitting with their heads bent, stitching.

  —  The Lives of Tudor Women (Elizabeth Norton)